WEBVTT - Emma Grede: #1 Trick Successful People Use Every Day (THIS Will Open Doors You Didn’t Know Existed!) 0:00:00.200 --> 0:00:02.440 I am so excited to be here tonight at the 0:00:02.480 --> 0:00:06.360 Bill Graham Civic Auditorium in San Francisco with the one 0:00:06.400 --> 0:00:11.280 and only Emma Greed. Emma, I can just keep saying 0:00:11.280 --> 0:00:14.680 your name. It's just like you are. First of all, 0:00:14.720 --> 0:00:16.880 I want to say, you're one of my dear friends. 0:00:17.120 --> 0:00:20.360 I adore you, I love you. I think you're incredible. 0:00:20.680 --> 0:00:21.320 Thank you, Darlan. 0:00:21.440 --> 0:00:23.160 The fact that you came out here to do this 0:00:23.280 --> 0:00:26.400 means the absolute world to me. And you heard the 0:00:26.480 --> 0:00:31.560 excitement and the energy in the room and yeah, honestly. 0:00:31.280 --> 0:00:34.400 J until about three hours ago, I thought it was 0:00:34.520 --> 0:00:36.680 eight hundred people that were here tonight, So I'm in 0:00:36.720 --> 0:00:39.640 a little bit of shock, to be totally honest, I'm like, what, 0:00:41.280 --> 0:00:41.680 I love it. 0:00:41.680 --> 0:00:45.280 It's definitely like thousands of people. I want to start 0:00:45.320 --> 0:00:47.040 with something that we've been talking about this evening, and 0:00:47.040 --> 0:00:48.800 it's interesting because you're actually talking about it in the 0:00:48.840 --> 0:00:51.120 clip that we heard from the show when you were 0:00:51.159 --> 0:00:55.240 on the podcast. We find that we spend so much 0:00:55.240 --> 0:00:58.080 of our times worrying about what people think of us. 0:00:58.400 --> 0:01:01.400 We're constantly our worst career in our mind with thinking, 0:01:01.480 --> 0:01:03.800 oh does this person think I'm this, think I'm that? 0:01:04.480 --> 0:01:06.240 I want you to take us to a time when 0:01:06.319 --> 0:01:08.480 that was in your head, and what were the kind 0:01:08.520 --> 0:01:10.360 of things you worried about that people thought of you, 0:01:10.800 --> 0:01:11.920 and what did you do about it? 0:01:12.480 --> 0:01:14.720 Well, you know, I think, like so many of us, 0:01:14.959 --> 0:01:18.880 I spent my entire life worried about that. And I'd 0:01:18.880 --> 0:01:21.000 be lying if I said there weren't parts of me 0:01:21.120 --> 0:01:25.479 that still feel like that now. But I honestly got 0:01:25.480 --> 0:01:29.080 to a certain point in my life where I thought, well, 0:01:29.280 --> 0:01:32.680 if not you, then who right? And I really feel 0:01:32.720 --> 0:01:35.560 like so much of my life has been about trying 0:01:35.600 --> 0:01:37.760 to prove something, and you get to the point where 0:01:37.800 --> 0:01:40.480 you're like, I don't really have anything to prove anymore. 0:01:40.880 --> 0:01:44.520 I wake up every single day and make a decision 0:01:44.640 --> 0:01:47.080 to do my very best, and who am I doing 0:01:47.080 --> 0:01:47.520 my best for? 0:01:47.920 --> 0:01:48.080 Well? 0:01:48.120 --> 0:01:50.920 For me? Right, I have to meet my own expectations. 0:01:51.000 --> 0:01:53.280 I have to get to the point where I can 0:01:53.360 --> 0:01:55.400 lay my head back down on that pillow at night 0:01:55.440 --> 0:01:58.640 and feel really, really good. And I've just got to 0:01:58.680 --> 0:02:01.360 the point where I feel like that is real for me. 0:02:01.560 --> 0:02:04.360 But you know, in my teens in my twenties, like 0:02:05.000 --> 0:02:08.120 you don't feel that way. That's just not your reality, 0:02:08.160 --> 0:02:11.160 And you spend a lot of time worried about what 0:02:11.200 --> 0:02:12.240 other people think. 0:02:12.520 --> 0:02:15.280 Yeah, and you get stuck, like we get so stifled 0:02:15.280 --> 0:02:17.320 by it, and we get so restricted by it. Do 0:02:17.360 --> 0:02:20.120 you remember ever, like missing out on an opportunity or 0:02:20.200 --> 0:02:22.480 not doing something because you're so worried. 0:02:22.800 --> 0:02:24.760 I mean, I have lists of things like that, because 0:02:24.800 --> 0:02:27.960 you imagine that everybody is watching you, like you're watching you. 0:02:28.400 --> 0:02:30.600 And I think that there were times in my life 0:02:30.639 --> 0:02:32.960 where I didn't speak up. There were times in my 0:02:33.000 --> 0:02:35.600 life where I didn't put myself forward. There were times 0:02:35.600 --> 0:02:38.760 in my life where I just not only kept quiet, 0:02:38.800 --> 0:02:41.919 but I kept out of the conversation, right like, not 0:02:42.680 --> 0:02:45.679 even in it, not really even putting myself out there. 0:02:46.000 --> 0:02:48.919 And so yeah, I feel like that was my reality 0:02:48.960 --> 0:02:51.600 for a very very long time. And I also think 0:02:51.680 --> 0:02:56.800 that there's part of being certainly a woman, but a 0:02:56.880 --> 0:03:01.040 younger woman in business, where there's this idea that everybody 0:03:01.080 --> 0:03:03.560 knows better than you. And the older you get, the 0:03:03.560 --> 0:03:06.919 more you realize no one knows anything. Every one of us. 0:03:07.000 --> 0:03:09.320 We're making it up as we go along. And you know, 0:03:09.360 --> 0:03:12.000 it's so interesting for me because at this stage of 0:03:12.000 --> 0:03:15.160 my career, I find myself in the rooms, you know, 0:03:15.280 --> 0:03:20.280 with the best investors with people that are doing incredible things, 0:03:20.320 --> 0:03:23.480 people that are in very very high level positions running 0:03:23.840 --> 0:03:27.519 companies or countries even and you do get to the 0:03:27.520 --> 0:03:29.320 point where you go, well, you know what I think. 0:03:29.720 --> 0:03:31.560 You know, you're not that different from me, and so 0:03:32.080 --> 0:03:34.560 there is a part of you that goes. You start 0:03:34.600 --> 0:03:38.160 to feel so much more confidence. But and I talk 0:03:38.200 --> 0:03:42.120 about this all the time, it isn't without some fear. 0:03:42.280 --> 0:03:45.160 And I do think that taking risks, and again, it's 0:03:45.200 --> 0:03:49.240 an inherently female thing sometimes to be risk adverse, and 0:03:49.600 --> 0:03:51.960 we're like that for so many reasons. But when the 0:03:52.120 --> 0:03:54.720 only reason is for self preservation, you really have to 0:03:54.760 --> 0:03:58.080 start thinking about what fear is doing negatively to you. 0:03:58.200 --> 0:04:00.480 And so I've spent a lot of time thinking about 0:04:00.760 --> 0:04:03.760 how I can park my fear and what else I 0:04:03.800 --> 0:04:05.040 can use that energy for. 0:04:05.640 --> 0:04:09.360 Oh so good, so good. Ever, I love that, and 0:04:09.360 --> 0:04:10.840 I want to talk to you about that. Let's let's 0:04:10.880 --> 0:04:12.280 dive into that. I was going to say that for later, 0:04:12.280 --> 0:04:13.840 but I'll dive into it as soon as you took 0:04:13.880 --> 0:04:16.520 it there. I remember reading a study that showed that 0:04:16.680 --> 0:04:21.479 when men see a job description, even if they can 0:04:21.640 --> 0:04:25.479 only do forty percent of it, they'll apply. But when 0:04:25.520 --> 0:04:27.839 women see a job description, even if they can do 0:04:27.960 --> 0:04:31.240 eighty percent of it, they won't apply it. And so 0:04:31.320 --> 0:04:36.480 there's this shift that definitely exists, this confidence, this feeling 0:04:36.560 --> 0:04:39.919 of trusting yourself, this feeling of oh, I'm worthy that 0:04:40.040 --> 0:04:43.440 comes in. Walk me through that experience that you've had 0:04:43.760 --> 0:04:45.599 since day one of feeling like, as a woman you 0:04:45.640 --> 0:04:47.920 had to prove more, You're to work harder. What does 0:04:47.960 --> 0:04:49.919 that actually look like? And what are women out there? 0:04:49.960 --> 0:04:52.160 I'm sure there's so many people in he who want 0:04:52.160 --> 0:04:55.279 to be entrepreneurs, have started something, but as seeing that, 0:04:55.760 --> 0:04:57.680 how do you see it but then live through it 0:04:57.720 --> 0:04:59.320 and build an empire like you have? 0:04:59.480 --> 0:05:01.480 Well, let's just be honest about some of that, right, 0:05:01.480 --> 0:05:04.760 because it isn't just about women holding themselves back. The 0:05:04.800 --> 0:05:08.080 barriers are real. They're really real, and so we should 0:05:08.320 --> 0:05:11.640 all recognize that. And it's one of the reasons that 0:05:11.680 --> 0:05:14.000 I've built the companies that I have with women at 0:05:14.000 --> 0:05:16.919 the helm, with women in positions of power, and with 0:05:17.040 --> 0:05:19.839 women as the decision makers, because we actually make better 0:05:19.880 --> 0:05:22.839 decisions about who to bring in the company in the 0:05:22.880 --> 0:05:27.160 first place. But I do, and it's true, it's true. 0:05:27.279 --> 0:05:29.479 You know, if you have a female banker. If you 0:05:29.520 --> 0:05:31.600 have a you know, somebody investing your money, that's a 0:05:31.640 --> 0:05:33.680 woman like she will do better for you. The facts 0:05:33.720 --> 0:05:37.240 and the figures are out there. So I want to 0:05:37.279 --> 0:05:40.240 be honest about these things, not just as what happens 0:05:40.240 --> 0:05:42.320 in our minds as women, but some of them are 0:05:42.640 --> 0:05:45.920 the societal barriers that truly truly exist. And I know 0:05:45.960 --> 0:05:47.920 it because I see it every day in my own company. 0:05:47.960 --> 0:05:50.080 And just to your point, you know, I'll have a 0:05:50.200 --> 0:05:53.240 role that I need a Spanish or a French speaker, 0:05:53.560 --> 0:05:56.360 and a man will come in with very limited abilities 0:05:56.360 --> 0:05:58.720 and tell me he's like a pro and completely fluent. 0:05:58.760 --> 0:06:01.240 And a woman who maybe just needs to brush up 0:06:01.240 --> 0:06:03.520 a bit, but she's basically fluent is like, oh, I'm 0:06:03.520 --> 0:06:07.159 not so sure. But again, I think that's about what 0:06:08.120 --> 0:06:12.000 has been allowed for women. And as soon as we 0:06:12.080 --> 0:06:17.800 start saying things and doing things that are considered braggadocious, 0:06:18.040 --> 0:06:21.360 getting out of our you know space, women face an 0:06:21.520 --> 0:06:24.279 enormous amount of criticism. And I get this all the time. 0:06:24.560 --> 0:06:26.400 You know, I was speaking about a subject and my 0:06:26.440 --> 0:06:29.600 team are like, don't show the subject. But I, you know, 0:06:29.760 --> 0:06:31.800 had a little thing a couple of weeks ago and 0:06:31.839 --> 0:06:36.320 on the same day, a very very prominent American businessman 0:06:36.480 --> 0:06:40.479 was having a very very similar like Twitter attack, X attack, 0:06:40.560 --> 0:06:42.560 whatever you want to call it, and I got so 0:06:42.720 --> 0:06:45.560 much backlash and no one said anything to him. In fact, 0:06:45.600 --> 0:06:48.160 he's got millions and millions of likes. So the standards 0:06:48.200 --> 0:06:51.360 are just very very different. But instead of shying away 0:06:51.360 --> 0:06:54.880 from those conversations, what I do is lean into those conversations, 0:06:54.920 --> 0:06:58.039 because the very idea that you have to be demure, 0:06:58.200 --> 0:06:59.960 that you have to be likable, that you have to 0:07:00.600 --> 0:07:02.920 lean into a certain convention of what it means to 0:07:02.960 --> 0:07:06.800 be a business a woman in business, if you do that, 0:07:06.960 --> 0:07:09.640 and I display that I'm actually holding women back. So 0:07:09.800 --> 0:07:12.320 I've just decided, like I'm not playing that game anymore. 0:07:12.480 --> 0:07:14.880 I'm going to do me, be me, and everyone else 0:07:14.960 --> 0:07:19.240 is going to have to like it. 0:07:18.520 --> 0:07:22.840 It's so important, it's so important. But what I love 0:07:22.880 --> 0:07:24.880 about what you've done with that is because there's one thing, 0:07:24.960 --> 0:07:28.080 like when we see injustice, when we see that kind 0:07:28.120 --> 0:07:30.800 of treatment in the world, we all notice it and 0:07:30.880 --> 0:07:33.160 we can talk about it. But then you've been able 0:07:33.240 --> 0:07:36.160 to get involved, get stuck in. You haven't let that 0:07:36.880 --> 0:07:39.960 hamper your growth. And I think that's the mindset that 0:07:39.960 --> 0:07:42.560 I'm always fascinated by. We all see things happening in 0:07:42.600 --> 0:07:44.240 the world that we hate, that we don't love, that 0:07:44.760 --> 0:07:47.640 don't feel fair, But then we still got to learn 0:07:47.680 --> 0:07:49.240 to play that game. We've still got to learn to 0:07:49.280 --> 0:07:52.040 win it that game, and you've done that multiple times. 0:07:52.360 --> 0:07:55.160 If someone's at the beginning of their journey, there's people 0:07:55.160 --> 0:07:58.160 in here of ideas, who have dreams, who have things 0:07:58.160 --> 0:08:01.560 that they want to start. They're concerned about whether it's fair, 0:08:01.560 --> 0:08:04.200 whether there's a meritocracy, whether it's set up for making 0:08:04.280 --> 0:08:08.040 them fail or succeed. What's the first thing they have 0:08:08.120 --> 0:08:10.320 to build in their mind and their heart, in their 0:08:10.360 --> 0:08:13.600 resolve or externally that you'd recommend they start with. 0:08:13.840 --> 0:08:15.560 You know, the first thing I want to say is 0:08:15.560 --> 0:08:19.560 that it's really important to start with yourself. We can 0:08:19.600 --> 0:08:22.800 be so concerned about everything that's happening around us. And 0:08:22.840 --> 0:08:25.840 I think what I did pretty well in early in 0:08:25.840 --> 0:08:29.280 my career was center my decisions around what it is 0:08:29.360 --> 0:08:33.520 that was important to me, and I never ever sacrificed 0:08:33.679 --> 0:08:37.160 my ambition. I was pretty out there and open and honest, 0:08:37.200 --> 0:08:40.480 and so I think if you want something, you have 0:08:40.520 --> 0:08:42.840 to go after it. You can't be shy about it. 0:08:42.880 --> 0:08:46.520 You've got to be very very honest and open about 0:08:46.559 --> 0:08:48.560 what it is that you need and what you're looking 0:08:48.600 --> 0:08:51.439 for all the time. And I do think a lot 0:08:51.480 --> 0:08:54.160 of us think, you know, we think a lot about 0:08:54.160 --> 0:08:56.880 what we want, but we don't necessarily make it known. 0:08:57.240 --> 0:08:59.480 And I speak to people about this all the time. 0:08:59.559 --> 0:09:02.400 Whatever you want and whatever you're thinking about doing in 0:09:02.440 --> 0:09:05.120 your life, the most important thing is to focus on 0:09:05.240 --> 0:09:07.880 what you're doing and what you can do right now. 0:09:08.200 --> 0:09:11.959 Be excellent in whatever it is that you're doing right now. 0:09:12.080 --> 0:09:13.520 You know, when I worked in a deli and I 0:09:13.520 --> 0:09:15.480 made the sandwiches and I spoke to you about it before, 0:09:15.840 --> 0:09:19.440 I was an amazing sandwich maker in the same way 0:09:19.480 --> 0:09:23.000 that I make amazing genes now. But whatever it is, 0:09:23.120 --> 0:09:26.480 I will apply myself in that way. And so I 0:09:26.520 --> 0:09:29.880 do think there's this idea of what it means to 0:09:29.920 --> 0:09:33.920 be like, really truly excellent at something, and that's how 0:09:33.960 --> 0:09:37.280 we can propel ourselves into the unimaginable. That's how we 0:09:37.320 --> 0:09:40.000 get to do new things. That's how people start to 0:09:40.120 --> 0:09:44.560 recognize us as individuals with skills outside of where we 0:09:44.640 --> 0:09:46.640 may be seen right now. So that's what I try 0:09:46.640 --> 0:09:49.920 to focus on. I focus on myself, and again, sounds 0:09:49.920 --> 0:09:52.600 really selfish, but that's what you have to be sometimes, 0:09:52.640 --> 0:09:55.240 and it's okay for a period in your life as 0:09:55.240 --> 0:09:57.080 a means to an end, to get somewhere. 0:09:57.360 --> 0:10:00.280 I really appreciate that mindset because I feel like it's 0:10:00.320 --> 0:10:03.040 a magnetic feeling that someone gives you when you see 0:10:03.080 --> 0:10:06.480 someone just be really good. I remember a few months ago, 0:10:06.520 --> 0:10:08.360 me and my friends were out for dinner in La 0:10:08.880 --> 0:10:12.040 and we're at this restaurant and the lady who was 0:10:12.280 --> 0:10:15.520 serving and taking our orders, she was just amazing, Like 0:10:15.600 --> 0:10:18.600 she had the recommendations. And this wasn't a fancy place, 0:10:18.920 --> 0:10:21.320 this was this was a casual spot on a Sunday. 0:10:21.640 --> 0:10:24.760 She knew every special she knew every little thing, she 0:10:24.800 --> 0:10:27.679 had great recommendations, she had great energy, and literally all 0:10:27.720 --> 0:10:29.000 three of us were like, so what do you do? 0:10:29.040 --> 0:10:30.880 What job do you want to do? Like literally everyone 0:10:30.880 --> 0:10:32.240 wants to everyone there. 0:10:32.400 --> 0:10:34.040 You want more of that. We all want to attract 0:10:34.200 --> 0:10:34.640 more of that. 0:10:34.840 --> 0:10:38.120 Yeah, And it goes to your exact point that sometimes 0:10:38.120 --> 0:10:39.760 we think, oh, I hate what I do right now, 0:10:40.000 --> 0:10:42.199 and I've got to find what I love. But actually, 0:10:42.240 --> 0:10:44.240 if you can be excellent even at what you hate, 0:10:44.360 --> 0:10:46.680 imagine how good you'll be at what you love doing, oh, 0:10:46.880 --> 0:10:47.679 one hundred percent. 0:10:47.720 --> 0:10:49.600 And I say it all the time because you know, 0:10:49.720 --> 0:10:53.880 I think that the three most important words for career 0:10:54.040 --> 0:10:58.440 acceleration is I'll do that. I spent my whole life 0:10:58.480 --> 0:11:01.880 with my hand up going I'll I'll do that. I'll 0:11:01.880 --> 0:11:04.520 do that, And it's so important, you know, just again, 0:11:04.559 --> 0:11:07.760 But it's about putting yourself out there and not imagining 0:11:07.800 --> 0:11:09.719 that you can't do something, or that you won't be 0:11:09.840 --> 0:11:11.839 chosen for it, or that it's not right for you 0:11:12.200 --> 0:11:14.680 because you're not doing it yet. So sometimes that little 0:11:14.720 --> 0:11:19.080 bit of vulnerability like really helps us three two. 0:11:18.679 --> 0:11:23.360 One three two one. 0:11:23.720 --> 0:11:24.360 I'll do that. 0:11:24.880 --> 0:11:27.559 I love that, I'll do that. I'll do that great one. Yeah. 0:11:27.800 --> 0:11:30.360 I remember reading a quote from Richard Branson when I 0:11:30.360 --> 0:11:31.760 was a kid, and he was always like, if you 0:11:31.760 --> 0:11:34.840 get an opportunity to do something, say yes and then 0:11:34.840 --> 0:11:37.960 figure out how to do it afterwards my whole life 0:11:37.160 --> 0:11:38.640 and I love it, and you. 0:11:38.679 --> 0:11:41.559 That's what I'm doing now, Jack, And. 0:11:41.559 --> 0:11:45.280 I think people underestimate that sometimes that's the pressure that 0:11:45.440 --> 0:11:48.960 actually gets you to step up, because if you don't 0:11:48.960 --> 0:11:50.640 have the opportunity, you keep waiting for it. When I 0:11:50.679 --> 0:11:52.800 get that chance, when I get that chance, and I 0:11:52.840 --> 0:11:55.480 love I'll do that because often we think, oh, that's 0:11:55.520 --> 0:11:57.560 not my thing. I won't do that. I'm not sure 0:11:57.600 --> 0:11:59.400 about that. I won't do that. I mean, you were 0:11:59.440 --> 0:12:03.520 saving to buy fashion magazines as a young girl. True, 0:12:03.640 --> 0:12:05.480 that blows my mind. Did you ever think you'd be 0:12:06.080 --> 0:12:09.080 in those fashion magazines or creating the fashion that is 0:12:09.120 --> 0:12:13.160 in those magazines? You do? 0:12:13.400 --> 0:12:15.680 I did. I'm going to sound so arrogant, but yes, 0:12:15.840 --> 0:12:17.800 I did. I really did. I love that. 0:12:18.080 --> 0:12:19.920 Well, you know what, I love that. Yeah, we love 0:12:19.960 --> 0:12:20.480 that energy. 0:12:20.640 --> 0:12:24.120 It's interesting, right because now we call it manifestation, But 0:12:24.360 --> 0:12:28.760 I as a kid really visualized the life that I wanted. 0:12:28.880 --> 0:12:30.640 And I remember, you know, because I grew up in 0:12:30.679 --> 0:12:33.600 the time where Oprah was on the TV every single day, 0:12:34.080 --> 0:12:37.439 and you know, she would talk about the ideas of gratitude, 0:12:37.480 --> 0:12:40.400 she would talk about mindfulness, she would talk about manifestation. 0:12:41.880 --> 0:12:44.480 I tell you what, the greatest thing that ever happened 0:12:44.520 --> 0:12:46.760 to me is that I was raised in a place 0:12:46.800 --> 0:12:50.839 and with a family where there honestly were no limitations 0:12:51.040 --> 0:12:54.000 ever put on me, and I truly believed it. I 0:12:54.160 --> 0:12:58.000 really honestly believed that I could do anything so long 0:12:58.040 --> 0:13:00.200 as I was willing to put the work in. So 0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:03.000 despite my education, despite where I came from, despite the 0:13:03.080 --> 0:13:06.760 mountain of excuses that I could have had, I really 0:13:06.880 --> 0:13:09.600 truly believed it if I applied myself, it would work. 0:13:09.640 --> 0:13:12.120 And as you know, a mother of four now, I 0:13:12.120 --> 0:13:14.640 think about that every day because my kids don't have 0:13:15.040 --> 0:13:17.440 the same hunger as I do. They don't want for 0:13:17.480 --> 0:13:20.040 the same things that I do. But in the same token, 0:13:20.480 --> 0:13:22.960 I want them and need them to find their purpose 0:13:23.040 --> 0:13:25.079 and their passion and what they're going to be good at. 0:13:25.280 --> 0:13:27.400 And so I think again, it is all comes back 0:13:27.440 --> 0:13:30.960 down to how you see yourself and the stories that 0:13:31.040 --> 0:13:34.400 you tell yourself, and how kind we can be to ourselves, 0:13:34.480 --> 0:13:37.840 because you've got like one big relationship, one big love 0:13:37.880 --> 0:13:40.480 in your life, and that's you. The person I hear 0:13:40.520 --> 0:13:43.200 from most is me. I wake up with me in 0:13:43.240 --> 0:13:45.000 the you know, in the morning, I go to bed 0:13:45.040 --> 0:13:47.600 with me at night. I'm chatting to myself the whole day. 0:13:47.920 --> 0:13:50.559 And I can choose that narrative, right. I can choose 0:13:50.600 --> 0:13:53.400 to be kind to myself. I can choose to tell 0:13:53.480 --> 0:13:56.200 me that I can do it, or I can create 0:13:56.240 --> 0:13:59.640 a really really negative narrative in really negative patterns. And 0:13:59.720 --> 0:14:02.400 so I wake up every day and I choose to 0:14:02.480 --> 0:14:05.880 tell myself that whatever it is, I can probably do 0:14:05.960 --> 0:14:08.760 it if I apply, if I learn, if I put 0:14:08.800 --> 0:14:11.320 one hundred percent effort in, if I surround myself with 0:14:11.360 --> 0:14:13.840 the right people, all of those things. And so I 0:14:13.840 --> 0:14:18.080 think it's just like constantly practice who you want to be. 0:14:18.280 --> 0:14:20.160 And I just feel like I'm in like a forever 0:14:20.280 --> 0:14:21.760 practice of who it is I want to be. 0:14:22.160 --> 0:14:26.240 Yeah, I love that, Yeah, absolutely give it up. It's 0:14:27.800 --> 0:14:31.400 it's such good advice and it's so true. And I 0:14:31.440 --> 0:14:34.240 feel like with you, you were always certain from an 0:14:34.280 --> 0:14:37.880 early age what you were passionate about, and fashion became 0:14:37.960 --> 0:14:40.560 your whole life, like you've been obsessed with it since 0:14:40.600 --> 0:14:42.920 you're a young kid. And I feel like today either 0:14:42.920 --> 0:14:45.960 it's because we're exposed to too many things, or there's 0:14:46.000 --> 0:14:48.920 too many stories of success and all this kind of 0:14:48.920 --> 0:14:51.960 stuff I think people are getting. People are struggling to 0:14:52.000 --> 0:14:55.040 know what they're passionate. Yes, And I'm sure you get 0:14:55.040 --> 0:14:56.680 this question all the time. And how do I find 0:14:56.680 --> 0:14:58.640 my passion? How do I know what I'm passionate about? 0:14:59.400 --> 0:15:01.560 Is passionate the right thing to look at? What do 0:15:01.640 --> 0:15:04.320 you suggest when people are like, am I all these ideas? 0:15:04.360 --> 0:15:06.840 I don't know where to start. How should people pick 0:15:06.960 --> 0:15:09.960 something their lane to focus on becoming excellent that. 0:15:09.960 --> 0:15:13.720 Oh you're going to hate this, don't look for your passion, like, don't, don't, don't, don't. 0:15:13.960 --> 0:15:16.800 It's so difficult because if some oftentimes the things that 0:15:16.840 --> 0:15:21.400 we love, I mean, they're not always great. Right. I 0:15:21.520 --> 0:15:23.240 love a glass of red wine. I would have had 0:15:23.280 --> 0:15:25.200 three before I came on this stage if I was 0:15:25.400 --> 0:15:27.640 following my passion and what my heart was telling me 0:15:27.680 --> 0:15:30.960 to do. But it didn't seem right for on purpose. 0:15:31.360 --> 0:15:33.800 So I think that what you have to do is 0:15:34.520 --> 0:15:38.280 find what you're good at, find what lights you up. 0:15:38.400 --> 0:15:41.760 And you know, often I think about the things that 0:15:42.240 --> 0:15:45.720 give you energy versus the things that take energy away. 0:15:45.880 --> 0:15:47.960 You know, when I saw you backstage, I was like, oh, 0:15:48.000 --> 0:15:51.520 my goodness, you must be exhausted and you must just 0:15:51.560 --> 0:15:54.000 want to go straight to sleep. And you said to me, actually, 0:15:54.000 --> 0:15:56.040 it takes me three hours to get to sleep after 0:15:56.080 --> 0:15:59.680 these shows because I'm so excited after. And I was like, yeah, 0:15:59.680 --> 0:16:02.600 because you are living your purpose, you are doing what 0:16:02.680 --> 0:16:05.240 gives you energy, and so I think you should go 0:16:05.400 --> 0:16:08.640 around and find what gives you energy and what you 0:16:08.720 --> 0:16:13.280 are good at, where your natural skills are, you know, leaning, 0:16:13.880 --> 0:16:17.120 and then you figure out your purpose. I don't think 0:16:17.120 --> 0:16:19.600 you can go around looking for the thing that's going 0:16:19.680 --> 0:16:23.400 to you know, be you know, you can't look around 0:16:23.440 --> 0:16:26.000 trying to figure out like, I am going to have 0:16:26.080 --> 0:16:29.320 this big purpose, because it's so it's so rare that 0:16:29.360 --> 0:16:31.840 you ever get there, and oftentimes, you know, I don't 0:16:31.840 --> 0:16:34.600 think fashion was a purpose for me. I think I 0:16:34.760 --> 0:16:37.560 liked really nice things, and I think I needed to 0:16:37.600 --> 0:16:40.920 find a career that paid me really well so I 0:16:40.920 --> 0:16:45.120 could buy those nice things, right, Like, it wasn't kind 0:16:45.160 --> 0:16:46.160 of true. 0:16:46.240 --> 0:16:48.160 No, But the advice to follow what you're good at 0:16:48.480 --> 0:16:52.560 is brilliant because competence build confidence, yes, And I think 0:16:52.560 --> 0:16:53.600 a lot of us are trying to do it the 0:16:53.640 --> 0:16:55.520 other way around. We're like, I want to be confident, 0:16:56.080 --> 0:16:58.160 but you can't be confident if you don't feel competent. 0:16:58.200 --> 0:16:59.960 And the only time you feel competent is when you 0:17:00.160 --> 0:17:02.440 do something you're really good at and something you're willing 0:17:02.480 --> 0:17:04.879 to get really good at. Yes, right, it's not like 0:17:05.160 --> 0:17:07.040 you may not be good at the thing you want 0:17:07.040 --> 0:17:09.359 to be good at right now, But You're more likely 0:17:09.400 --> 0:17:12.080 to dedicate time to it if you think, oh, I 0:17:12.119 --> 0:17:13.760 really want to excel at that. I think one of 0:17:13.800 --> 0:17:16.119 the biggest challenges I see for a lot of people 0:17:16.200 --> 0:17:18.719 is if you only focus on passion, which, by the way, 0:17:18.760 --> 0:17:21.720 I love your advice. If you only follow your passion 0:17:22.000 --> 0:17:25.560 when things get hard, you then feel not passionate about it, 0:17:25.640 --> 0:17:28.040 Whereas if you follow what you're good at, you realize, 0:17:28.080 --> 0:17:30.120 whether things are going well or not, you just got 0:17:30.160 --> 0:17:30.920 to get better than. 0:17:30.920 --> 0:17:33.040 A million percent. And I love that you talk about 0:17:33.040 --> 0:17:36.840 focus because I'm obsessed with this idea of true focus. 0:17:36.920 --> 0:17:40.640 You know, focus is a force multiplier in business, it's 0:17:40.640 --> 0:17:45.000 a force multiplier in work. When you figure out what 0:17:45.280 --> 0:17:48.480 you can actually dedicate yourself to and give all of 0:17:48.520 --> 0:17:50.880 your focus, and you truly do that, whether in your 0:17:50.880 --> 0:17:53.679 life and your business and your relationships, you will find 0:17:53.960 --> 0:17:58.920 unbelievable unlocks. I don't know anyone who is successful who 0:17:59.040 --> 0:18:04.520 hasn't been unbelievably unequivocally focused on something and gone deep 0:18:04.600 --> 0:18:06.560 and deep and deep and figured it more and more 0:18:06.600 --> 0:18:09.480 things out and then found and unlock. And so I 0:18:09.600 --> 0:18:13.119 really think about that as something that completely opens up 0:18:13.160 --> 0:18:15.080 a new well to you. And when you are willing 0:18:15.160 --> 0:18:19.200 to learn and to go really deep in one place, 0:18:19.600 --> 0:18:22.359 amazing things start happening like they do. It's like it 0:18:22.440 --> 0:18:23.560 really is like magic. 0:18:23.920 --> 0:18:26.359 What distracts us from focus? Like? What is it that's 0:18:26.359 --> 0:18:29.800 blocking us from becoming that single minded that? You reminded 0:18:29.840 --> 0:18:32.360 me of one of my favorite pieces of wisdom from 0:18:32.640 --> 0:18:36.000 Bruce Lee. Bruce Lee once said, I'm not scared of 0:18:36.040 --> 0:18:40.439 the person who's practiced ten thousand kicks once each I'm 0:18:40.520 --> 0:18:44.960 scared of the person who's practiced one kick ten thousand times, right, Like, 0:18:45.040 --> 0:18:48.240 that's the person that's scary. That the person who's practiced 0:18:48.280 --> 0:18:51.840 the same thing over and over again, that laser like focus, 0:18:52.240 --> 0:18:55.480 that's the scary person. Yes, the person who's got scattered attention, 0:18:56.240 --> 0:18:59.359 they're not even in the competition. But why is it 0:18:59.359 --> 0:19:01.120 that we all end up being those kind of people 0:19:01.160 --> 0:19:02.520 who are like, Okay, I've got to spend time with 0:19:02.520 --> 0:19:04.200 my family, got to figure this out, I've got to 0:19:04.240 --> 0:19:06.080 do these three things over here, Like that's what we 0:19:06.119 --> 0:19:07.040 all fill our life with. 0:19:07.359 --> 0:19:09.639 Because I feel like we're in a culture right now 0:19:09.720 --> 0:19:12.040 that tells us that you have to do and be 0:19:12.359 --> 0:19:15.200 so many different things. You know, when I grew up 0:19:15.240 --> 0:19:18.240 it's like you drove a van, you're a carpenter, you 0:19:18.320 --> 0:19:20.399 worked in a store, you're a chef, like, do you 0:19:20.400 --> 0:19:22.320 know what I mean? Like you were a thing. And 0:19:22.400 --> 0:19:25.359 now we all believe that we should be so many 0:19:25.400 --> 0:19:30.160 different things. And the truth is that it's so rewarding 0:19:30.359 --> 0:19:33.800 to get good at something like I consider myself. People 0:19:33.840 --> 0:19:35.800 say to me, Emma, how do you do so many things? 0:19:35.840 --> 0:19:37.960 You have so many businesses. It's like, I do one 0:19:38.000 --> 0:19:41.960 thing really really well. I'm an excellent merchant. I understand 0:19:42.040 --> 0:19:44.800 what people want to buy and how much they're willing 0:19:44.840 --> 0:19:47.040 to pay for it, and I do that over and 0:19:47.119 --> 0:19:49.520 over and over and over again. That's that. That's it. 0:19:50.160 --> 0:19:53.480 That's all I do. And it's really important to know 0:19:53.840 --> 0:19:56.320 and to figure out how you can go deep on 0:19:56.400 --> 0:19:59.760 something and not spread yourself too thinly. And I think 0:19:59.760 --> 0:20:03.000 this idea, you know, we as a as a society, 0:20:03.160 --> 0:20:07.919 we really believe these stories of like, you know, overnight success. 0:20:08.520 --> 0:20:12.040 But it isn't true, right, it's not a career plan 0:20:12.200 --> 0:20:15.040 to think like that. And if I'm really really honest, 0:20:15.400 --> 0:20:18.520 I have never ever worked harder in my life than 0:20:18.520 --> 0:20:21.679 I do today. That's that's the honest truth. It doesn't 0:20:21.720 --> 0:20:24.880 get easier. When you get more successful, it gets much 0:20:24.920 --> 0:20:27.320 more difficult. And so I think, if that's the life 0:20:27.400 --> 0:20:29.800 that you're looking for and you want to do great things, 0:20:29.960 --> 0:20:33.159 you've got to be willing to sacrifice some other stuff 0:20:33.240 --> 0:20:34.680 and go deep on one thing. 0:20:34.920 --> 0:20:36.840 Yeah, and when you do it, it doesn't feel like 0:20:36.880 --> 0:20:40.679 a sacrifice. No, it's so fulfilling one hundred percent. It 0:20:40.800 --> 0:20:42.800 just might feel like, oh my goodness. 0:20:42.880 --> 0:20:45.040 There were all of these options that I had, But 0:20:45.160 --> 0:20:48.520 to me, it's really interesting to think about where your 0:20:48.560 --> 0:20:50.879 strengths are and find what you're good at and go 0:20:51.080 --> 0:20:51.880 into that thing. 0:20:52.080 --> 0:20:54.399 Yeah. I love the way you articulate your strengths. I 0:20:54.440 --> 0:20:57.840 remember years ago, and I have no affiliation with this platform, 0:20:57.840 --> 0:21:00.480 but it's amazing. I remember years ago I did something 0:21:00.520 --> 0:21:03.399 called Strengths Finder, and it's this test that asks you 0:21:03.440 --> 0:21:06.080 all these questions. It's like fifty dollars on the Internet. 0:21:06.320 --> 0:21:08.000 You fill it out and it will give you your 0:21:08.040 --> 0:21:09.560 top thirty four strengths. 0:21:09.560 --> 0:21:11.479 Oh wow, in order thirty four strengths. 0:21:12.160 --> 0:21:14.320 You know, everyone ever on ever on histaty four strengths. 0:21:14.359 --> 0:21:15.480 It ranks them in order. 0:21:15.680 --> 0:21:19.320 Yes, Jay had thirty four, stroke we all had three. 0:21:20.640 --> 0:21:22.880 No, No, No. The model is thirty four strengths. Everyone 0:21:22.880 --> 0:21:25.160 will get thirty four, I promise. But it's all about 0:21:25.200 --> 0:21:28.159 your top five strengths. And what's fascinating to me is 0:21:28.200 --> 0:21:30.120 when I did that, and it's a thing you've got 0:21:30.119 --> 0:21:32.399 to take an hour to do properly. Of course, the 0:21:32.440 --> 0:21:35.280 more self aware you are, the better it is. When 0:21:35.320 --> 0:21:37.200 I look to my top five strengths, and I imagine 0:21:37.200 --> 0:21:38.680 if you look to yours. And I use this when 0:21:38.680 --> 0:21:41.240 I'm hiring, I use this when I'm meeting people. I 0:21:41.320 --> 0:21:43.800 use it with clients. When I look at my top 0:21:43.800 --> 0:21:47.439 five strengds, I knew four of them, but I didn't 0:21:47.480 --> 0:21:50.920 know the first one. Wow. Really, we're on that piece 0:21:50.960 --> 0:21:53.119 of paper, I mean, sorry, on the digital PDF that 0:21:53.160 --> 0:21:56.199 it sends you back. I was like, I had no 0:21:56.800 --> 0:21:59.879 idea that that was my top strength, and from that 0:22:00.080 --> 0:22:02.040 day on I leaned into that strength. 0:22:02.040 --> 0:22:03.520 Well, well, now you've got to tell us what you're touching, 0:22:04.200 --> 0:22:04.760 what is happening. 0:22:05.000 --> 0:22:07.120 So my top five, I'll tell the four first before 0:22:07.119 --> 0:22:10.680 the first one. There's communications is in my top five? 0:22:11.600 --> 0:22:12.080 We agree? 0:22:12.320 --> 0:22:18.920 Yeah, Ideation, intellections, ideations, coming up with original ideas and intellections, 0:22:19.320 --> 0:22:26.040 having thoughtful, reflective discussions and then the fourth one ideation, intellection, 0:22:26.800 --> 0:22:29.240 what I say, communication, And there's one more in there 0:22:29.240 --> 0:22:31.440 I can't remember. And the top one, number one was strategy. 0:22:32.080 --> 0:22:34.280 Strategy, Yeah, was my number one skill and. 0:22:34.240 --> 0:22:37.000 I never knew that, Like I wasn't conscious of that. 0:22:37.440 --> 0:22:39.440 And the moment I became conscious of the fact that 0:22:39.480 --> 0:22:44.240 I'm extremely strategic, it shifted my entire way everything. It 0:22:44.280 --> 0:22:47.840 shifted everything. And I would encourage, Like I said, I 0:22:47.840 --> 0:22:49.840 have no affiliation with the company, I highly recommend you 0:22:49.880 --> 0:22:51.800 do it because you might look at those and go, 0:22:51.880 --> 0:22:54.439 wait a minute. Like when you articulated your strength, you 0:22:54.440 --> 0:22:57.440 are so clear, You're like, this is what I'm good at. Yeah, 0:22:57.480 --> 0:22:59.440 And when you're able to do that, it filled you 0:22:59.480 --> 0:23:01.960 with confidence, to fills you with competence, and all of 0:23:02.000 --> 0:23:04.560 a sudden you realize why your life's been going wrong. Yeah. 0:23:04.600 --> 0:23:06.840 Not only that, you realize what you need around you, 0:23:07.160 --> 0:23:09.879 because my whole thing is that none of us are 0:23:09.920 --> 0:23:11.000 successful alone. 0:23:11.080 --> 0:23:11.280 Right. 0:23:11.320 --> 0:23:15.320 I've arrived here tonight with like a smuttering of people 0:23:15.400 --> 0:23:17.600 with me, right, because you don't just wake up and 0:23:18.280 --> 0:23:22.960 turn up like that. Sadly, I don't look it took 0:23:22.960 --> 0:23:26.480 a lot to roll me out here tonight. But I 0:23:26.520 --> 0:23:29.080 do think it's kind of interesting because I think about 0:23:29.080 --> 0:23:33.520 my own strengths, like I have an unbelievable ability to focus, 0:23:33.840 --> 0:23:36.080 Like that is something that I'm very very good at. 0:23:36.359 --> 0:23:39.760 I am as resilient as a person gets, like it 0:23:39.840 --> 0:23:42.080 takes a lot to get to me, and I can 0:23:42.080 --> 0:23:43.840 take a lot of knockbacks, and I can take a 0:23:43.880 --> 0:23:47.640 lot of bad news. And I have a work ethic 0:23:48.200 --> 0:23:51.320 like you wouldn't believe, Like it's just I can work 0:23:51.400 --> 0:23:53.440 and work and go and go and go, and I've 0:23:53.480 --> 0:23:56.560 needed those three things. But there's an enormous amount of 0:23:56.560 --> 0:24:01.440 things that I'm just horrendous, not just a little bit bad, 0:24:01.840 --> 0:24:05.200 like really bad. I am super impatient, like I have 0:24:05.280 --> 0:24:08.119 no patience, and so I have to surround myself with 0:24:08.160 --> 0:24:11.080 people that have the things that I don't have. And 0:24:11.119 --> 0:24:15.040 I think that it's again so important to understand like 0:24:15.720 --> 0:24:19.159 who you are, not like, where are your weaknesses? What 0:24:19.240 --> 0:24:21.480 are you not good at? And again we always go 0:24:21.520 --> 0:24:23.880 around going you know, what do I need? Who am 0:24:23.880 --> 0:24:24.280 I like? 0:24:24.359 --> 0:24:24.520 Me? 0:24:24.520 --> 0:24:27.280 Me? Me, me me, And it's like it's so important 0:24:27.280 --> 0:24:31.760 in your life to surround yourself with friends, with business partners, 0:24:31.800 --> 0:24:35.679 with colleagues that have all the things that you don't have, 0:24:35.800 --> 0:24:37.399 and I think that that is one of the reasons 0:24:37.440 --> 0:24:40.320 I've been really successful. I surround myself with the right 0:24:40.359 --> 0:24:41.600 people constantly. 0:25:00.600 --> 0:25:02.800 As I'm listening to you, I'm just thinking about how 0:25:03.359 --> 0:25:06.640 this self awareness principle for everyone sitting here is. It's 0:25:06.680 --> 0:25:09.960 so powerful. And we're so told in society to get 0:25:10.000 --> 0:25:14.040 better at what we're bad at. And I remember, and 0:25:14.359 --> 0:25:16.160 this is real for me. When I became a consultant, 0:25:16.200 --> 0:25:18.679 after I left the monastery, finally got a job. I 0:25:18.720 --> 0:25:20.880 was lucky to get a job. I was rejected by 0:25:20.880 --> 0:25:24.400 forty companies before I got it. And when I finally 0:25:24.440 --> 0:25:26.480 got that job, they were telling me, you've got to 0:25:26.480 --> 0:25:28.800 be good at Excel. You've got to be good at PowerPoint, 0:25:28.920 --> 0:25:30.119 You've got to be good at this, you got to 0:25:30.160 --> 0:25:31.560 be good at this. And it was like a suite 0:25:31.600 --> 0:25:33.320 of things you had to be good at. And I 0:25:33.400 --> 0:25:35.159 was like, I do not want to be good at 0:25:35.200 --> 0:25:40.239 Microsoft Excel. I still don't. I still don't know how 0:25:40.280 --> 0:25:41.880 to do a v look up. All right, For any 0:25:41.920 --> 0:25:44.440 of you geeks out there and there's. 0:25:44.280 --> 0:25:46.840 The wrong town to you, admit that. Let me tell you. 0:25:47.440 --> 0:25:49.280 They're like so pasted out here. 0:25:49.480 --> 0:25:52.600 I know they're like, oh, you right, bro, seriously. 0:25:52.320 --> 0:25:55.359 Well, like Ai and Oba, but it's that kind of 0:25:55.400 --> 0:25:58.359 idea of like you're so you're drawt you're told to 0:25:58.400 --> 0:26:01.520 get good at things that aren't your thing, and you 0:26:01.640 --> 0:26:03.600 constantly are wasting all this time and energy. 0:26:03.680 --> 0:26:06.960 Focus. Talking about focus, You've got a finite amount of focus, 0:26:07.359 --> 0:26:10.359 and if you're spending it on all the things you're 0:26:10.400 --> 0:26:13.120 not that great at, maybe you'll get average at those. 0:26:13.680 --> 0:26:15.280 But if you put it in the things, as Emma saying, 0:26:15.359 --> 0:26:17.760 the things you're good at, you can become phenomenal at those. 0:26:18.080 --> 0:26:19.800 And that's what we need to encourage people to do. 0:26:19.920 --> 0:26:21.119 Yes, it's really true. 0:26:21.240 --> 0:26:24.920 Yeah, I wanted to ask you. You have four adorable 0:26:25.000 --> 0:26:28.919 children adore like the cutest, like truly the cutest. You 0:26:28.960 --> 0:26:30.720 post about them all the time as well. You have 0:26:30.800 --> 0:26:32.959 an amazing husband as well, who I love yends like 0:26:33.280 --> 0:26:34.000 what a great man. 0:26:34.160 --> 0:26:34.720 Lucky girl. 0:26:35.200 --> 0:26:37.480 Yeah, and it's just beautiful to see what you've been 0:26:37.480 --> 0:26:39.440 able to create. And what did you say? 0:26:39.480 --> 0:26:40.560 I said, I'm a lucky girl. 0:26:42.400 --> 0:26:47.760 He's a lucky And when I look at I was 0:26:47.760 --> 0:26:50.679 wondering if we ask your kids what does mum do? 0:26:50.920 --> 0:26:52.320 How would they explain it? Oh? 0:26:52.359 --> 0:26:55.679 My goodness, So my kids like, this is like a 0:26:55.680 --> 0:26:57.760 big graduation week for everybody. 0:26:57.840 --> 0:26:57.959 Right. 0:26:57.960 --> 0:27:00.000 So I've an eleven year old and eight and twins 0:27:00.000 --> 0:27:02.280 three year olds, and the three year olds had like 0:27:02.320 --> 0:27:04.040 one of those projects where it was like, you know, 0:27:04.119 --> 0:27:06.919 what's your mom's name? Your dad named Da Da? And 0:27:06.960 --> 0:27:11.600 my kid said, our mum goes to work all the time. 0:27:11.680 --> 0:27:15.040 And I was like, you know, it's one of those things. 0:27:15.119 --> 0:27:16.159 I'm like, what are you going to do? 0:27:16.240 --> 0:27:16.439 You know? 0:27:16.520 --> 0:27:18.040 And and there was a part of me that I 0:27:18.080 --> 0:27:21.439 was like, do I feel shame about that? Am I 0:27:21.680 --> 0:27:25.119 comfortable with that? But you know, I've really made it 0:27:25.240 --> 0:27:29.560 a point to tell my kids how much I love work, 0:27:29.680 --> 0:27:32.560 because I felt that with my first two I was 0:27:32.680 --> 0:27:36.760 constantly in some cycle of apologies. I'm sorry that I'm leaving, 0:27:36.840 --> 0:27:39.280 I'm sorry that I'm going to New York. I'm sorry 0:27:39.280 --> 0:27:42.439 that I'll be back late tonight. And what I realized 0:27:43.200 --> 0:27:46.240 is that I created a narrative that I didn't really 0:27:46.320 --> 0:27:48.520 like what I was doing. And I had this conversation 0:27:48.600 --> 0:27:50.760 with my daughter as I was going to New York, like, 0:27:51.080 --> 0:27:53.200 you know a few months ago, and she said, I'm 0:27:53.280 --> 0:27:55.320 so sorry You've got to go on this trip. And 0:27:55.359 --> 0:27:57.440 I said, lo when I go to New York, I 0:27:57.480 --> 0:27:59.879 have an amazing time. I sleep diagonally. I go out, 0:28:00.040 --> 0:28:02.399 my friends are drink too much wine, like, I have 0:28:02.520 --> 0:28:06.040 the best time. And she said to me, Oh, Okay, 0:28:06.280 --> 0:28:08.280 have an amazing time. I'll see you in three days. 0:28:08.280 --> 0:28:11.240 And I thought, wow, I did that. So I'm working 0:28:11.359 --> 0:28:14.360 really hard to let my kids know. Yeah, like, I'm 0:28:14.400 --> 0:28:16.840 not the mom that is at every drop off, I'm 0:28:16.840 --> 0:28:19.119 not the mom that is volunteering at the school. But 0:28:19.240 --> 0:28:22.159 guess what, there are all of these other amazing things 0:28:22.160 --> 0:28:25.080 that I do that I enjoy, and I'm not trying 0:28:25.080 --> 0:28:27.840 to make you guys feel guilty about it. I'm not 0:28:27.880 --> 0:28:29.760 trying to play a marda. These are things that I 0:28:29.880 --> 0:28:32.439 really love and enjoy, and I kind of feel like 0:28:32.600 --> 0:28:35.639 my kids are cool with it because they've been raised 0:28:35.680 --> 0:28:37.639 like that and they know that they can go after 0:28:37.680 --> 0:28:40.960 their dreams unashamedly. And I feel like if we start 0:28:41.000 --> 0:28:43.360 to shift that narrative with our children, it will make 0:28:43.640 --> 0:28:46.800 everything so much easier because nobody wants mum guilt. Nobody 0:28:46.840 --> 0:28:49.520 wants any parental guilt, and we all know it's there, 0:28:49.600 --> 0:28:50.440 but we don't need that. 0:28:52.160 --> 0:28:54.680 Yeah, it's you know, I can only speak about it 0:28:54.720 --> 0:28:57.160 from being a son to a mom that I love. 0:28:57.200 --> 0:29:01.560 And I've told you this before. Like my mom was 0:29:01.600 --> 0:29:03.560 the bread wren of the house. She'd wake up in 0:29:03.600 --> 0:29:06.840 the morning, make me and my sister lunch to take 0:29:06.880 --> 0:29:09.480 with us to school, make us breakfast, she'd drop us 0:29:09.520 --> 0:29:13.120 to school, go to work. We'd get picked up by 0:29:14.400 --> 0:29:16.360 a nanny from school. We'd wait there for a couple 0:29:16.400 --> 0:29:18.480 of hours. My mom would come back from work, pick 0:29:18.560 --> 0:29:20.600 us up, make us dinner, help us with our homework, 0:29:21.280 --> 0:29:24.040 and then go back to work in the evening. And 0:29:25.000 --> 0:29:27.480 I really believe that my work ethic is because of 0:29:27.520 --> 0:29:30.120 watching my mom work. Yes, And here's the interesting thing. 0:29:30.400 --> 0:29:32.560 I didn't have a lot of time with my mom 0:29:32.600 --> 0:29:36.480 growing up, but I never felt unloved. And I've started 0:29:36.520 --> 0:29:41.000 to realize that time doesn't equal love. But that's what 0:29:41.040 --> 0:29:42.960 we've all convinced ourselves. We're like, if I'm there for 0:29:43.000 --> 0:29:45.520 you all the time, then that means I love you. 0:29:46.160 --> 0:29:48.000 And actually that's not the case, because I I'm there 0:29:48.040 --> 0:29:50.720 all the time, but I'm not happy, I'm not really present, 0:29:51.160 --> 0:29:54.400 I'm on my phone, I'm distracted, I'm over entertaining you. 0:29:54.400 --> 0:29:55.880 You don't get time to be bored. You don't get 0:29:55.920 --> 0:29:59.280 time to be disconnect. Time doesn't equal love. And I 0:29:59.280 --> 0:30:02.440 feel like today put a lot of pressure on parents 0:30:02.440 --> 0:30:05.400 to have to be everything at home and perform at 0:30:05.400 --> 0:30:08.520 work and be amazing partners. When I look around, it's 0:30:08.840 --> 0:30:11.200 really hard on my friends that I see having that 0:30:11.240 --> 0:30:14.239 pressure to be a perfect parent, a perfect professional, a 0:30:14.240 --> 0:30:17.640 perfect partner, a perfect everything. Yeah, because it wasn't like that. 0:30:17.800 --> 0:30:19.560 But we also have to figure out where does that 0:30:19.600 --> 0:30:22.600 pressure come from, right, because oftentimes it's coming from some 0:30:22.800 --> 0:30:26.720 outside source or we're putting it on ourselves. And I 0:30:26.760 --> 0:30:30.720 did an exercise for myself when I first had Grace, 0:30:30.800 --> 0:30:34.640 so like eleven years ago, and I wrote down what 0:30:34.760 --> 0:30:37.719 was important to me, because you know what, there are 0:30:37.800 --> 0:30:40.520 certain non negotiables, like if my kids in a play, 0:30:40.960 --> 0:30:43.320 if they're you know, like we had a big graduation 0:30:43.520 --> 0:30:46.640 thing today, Like I am there, but I don't know 0:30:46.680 --> 0:30:51.320 that I think it's important to make like instagrammable lunch boxes, 0:30:51.600 --> 0:30:54.920 Like that's not something I need to do, you know, 0:30:55.160 --> 0:30:57.760 And so I don't do that. But you know, it's 0:30:57.760 --> 0:30:59.560 like it's so it's really important to figure out, like 0:30:59.680 --> 0:31:03.040 these my standards or are these somebody else's standards? And 0:31:03.080 --> 0:31:05.360 one of my non negotiables, and so I feel like 0:31:05.440 --> 0:31:09.520 once you get there, everything suddenly falls into place, and 0:31:09.560 --> 0:31:12.280 that's the important thing, Like in all parts of our life, 0:31:12.360 --> 0:31:15.080 like where are my standards? Where are the places that 0:31:15.320 --> 0:31:20.440 I feel that I will absolutely not be happy if 0:31:20.480 --> 0:31:22.959 these things are happening in my life? Where are the 0:31:22.960 --> 0:31:25.960 places that I feel like I would be making a 0:31:26.000 --> 0:31:29.040 sacrifice versus what is everybody else thinking of me? Or 0:31:29.080 --> 0:31:30.560 did I see that? I feel like I need to 0:31:30.560 --> 0:31:32.600 be keeping up with what do the school tell me? 0:31:33.080 --> 0:31:35.600 You know I need to do? Because half the time, 0:31:35.920 --> 0:31:38.120 if you know, if you can level with things in 0:31:38.160 --> 0:31:40.480 your own life, like you'll be okay. So I think 0:31:40.520 --> 0:31:44.320 it's really important and I constantly have those conversations with 0:31:44.360 --> 0:31:47.440 myself because life that you're you're in this constant change 0:31:47.480 --> 0:31:50.480 mode hopefully right, Like what worked for my kids when 0:31:50.480 --> 0:31:53.160 they were five doesn't work for them at eleven, And 0:31:53.240 --> 0:31:56.760 so I try to reassess constantly, like how do I 0:31:56.920 --> 0:31:59.880 really feel about these things? And I write it down. 0:32:00.040 --> 0:32:02.600 I'm like, it's really important for me to have a 0:32:02.640 --> 0:32:05.640 girl's trip once a year, and I do that every 0:32:05.760 --> 0:32:09.520 single year without fail, Like like I don't negotiate, I 0:32:09.520 --> 0:32:11.600 don't like say to my husband. Oh, I can't like 0:32:11.880 --> 0:32:14.320 can't figure out the data. It's like it is happening. 0:32:14.360 --> 0:32:15.960 That is one of the things that makes me happy 0:32:16.000 --> 0:32:19.840 because those connections, those relationships are something that I find 0:32:20.160 --> 0:32:22.680 absolutely precious. And so I just have a bunch of 0:32:22.680 --> 0:32:25.120 things that I feel and non negotiable in my life. 0:32:25.320 --> 0:32:27.600 But they're mine. It's my list. I own it. It 0:32:27.640 --> 0:32:29.720 doesn't belong to anyone else and it doesn't come from 0:32:29.720 --> 0:32:32.440 anywhere else. And the rest I just say, like, I'm 0:32:32.440 --> 0:32:32.959 not doing it. 0:32:35.880 --> 0:32:40.200 So good, so good, honestly, Like I love the standard 0:32:40.240 --> 0:32:44.080 piece because maybe someone's standard is to make instagrammable lunches. Yes, 0:32:44.320 --> 0:32:45.200 beautiful and good for them. 0:32:45.240 --> 0:32:46.400 I love watching those videos. 0:32:46.480 --> 0:32:47.360 I watched the video. 0:32:47.680 --> 0:32:48.600 I just don't want to make. 0:32:48.480 --> 0:32:51.760 The lunch and that's what's so beautiful. And that's that's 0:32:51.840 --> 0:32:54.440 kind of where we're struggling. I feel where we're making 0:32:54.480 --> 0:32:57.680 someone else's standards are standards, as you said, and that's 0:32:57.680 --> 0:33:00.440 where everything goes wrong. You know again, I want to 0:33:00.480 --> 0:33:02.240 go back to the point you made earlier about this. 0:33:02.960 --> 0:33:07.040 Women get this asked this question, especially as CEOs, especially 0:33:07.080 --> 0:33:10.560 as business builders, far more disproportionately than men. To be honest, 0:33:10.560 --> 0:33:12.240 I don't think men you get asked this, And so 0:33:12.280 --> 0:33:15.280 when I'm asking this, I'm asking it self aware and 0:33:15.400 --> 0:33:17.960 want to make that point that women always get asked 0:33:18.200 --> 0:33:20.600 how do you balance it all? Right, which men don't 0:33:20.640 --> 0:33:22.400 get asked, Like if I'm sitting with a male CEO 0:33:22.720 --> 0:33:24.320 E fact, no one goes, hey, wait a minute, how 0:33:24.320 --> 0:33:25.080 do you balance it all? 0:33:25.120 --> 0:33:28.400 Yeah? Yo, elon, how's the balance going? We were seventeen 0:33:28.480 --> 0:33:29.120 kids like. 0:33:32.600 --> 0:33:41.280 But and so I asked it for that reaction, right, 0:33:41.960 --> 0:33:44.160 and you get asked and all the rest of it. 0:33:44.320 --> 0:33:48.760 And then how have you been able to And this 0:33:48.880 --> 0:33:50.320 is true for me too, and I think about it, 0:33:50.360 --> 0:33:53.360 but you've done it with you do have beautiful We 0:33:53.360 --> 0:33:56.040 were just literally when I saw you this today, you 0:33:56.080 --> 0:33:59.200 were facetiming your daughter and she was building a crown. 0:33:59.360 --> 0:34:00.600 It made a man natile. 0:34:00.800 --> 0:34:03.560 Yeah, it was so happy with it, so happy. 0:34:03.680 --> 0:34:05.600 It's beautiful and we're talking to that and then and 0:34:05.640 --> 0:34:08.319 then Yen's your husband who I know too, and he's 0:34:08.320 --> 0:34:11.200 like having dinner while you're getting ready and you chatting, 0:34:11.239 --> 0:34:13.399 and it's so beautiful to see, right, and like you're 0:34:13.480 --> 0:34:16.719 finding time for all of these really important relationships, even 0:34:16.760 --> 0:34:18.839 though you've been so kind to come out and help 0:34:18.880 --> 0:34:22.040 me out with this. And so when I see that happening, 0:34:22.080 --> 0:34:24.120 I'm like, what does it take? What does it take 0:34:24.760 --> 0:34:29.160 to be the powerhouse CEO, to be a present wife, 0:34:29.200 --> 0:34:31.240 to be a connected mum? Like, what is that taking? 0:34:31.320 --> 0:34:33.840 And I know you, I know you don't believe in perfection? 0:34:34.640 --> 0:34:36.040 What is that? What does it take? 0:34:37.520 --> 0:34:41.000 So, at the risk of sounding and saying things that 0:34:41.040 --> 0:34:43.840 I've said a lot, I do talk about the ideas 0:34:43.880 --> 0:34:46.040 of trade offs all the time. I talk about the 0:34:46.080 --> 0:34:51.279 idea of an unbelievable amount of help. But I think 0:34:51.320 --> 0:34:53.839 the most important thing to talk about in the context 0:34:53.880 --> 0:35:00.000 of where we are today is really thinking about ourselves, 0:35:01.440 --> 0:35:05.399 really thinking about ourselves, because if the standard and if 0:35:05.400 --> 0:35:08.399 people look at me and think, well, you know, her 0:35:08.480 --> 0:35:11.880 hair's done, and the husband's nice, and the kids look perfect, 0:35:11.960 --> 0:35:14.360 and that house is good and she's running all these companies, 0:35:14.480 --> 0:35:17.360 you would have missed the entire point of me. Because 0:35:17.400 --> 0:35:22.919 what I do well is what works for me. That's 0:35:22.960 --> 0:35:25.480 what works for me. And I think that if we 0:35:25.680 --> 0:35:28.560 think for one second that we have to emulate and 0:35:28.600 --> 0:35:31.279 we have to take pieces of everybody's life, like, that's 0:35:31.320 --> 0:35:34.120 where we start to go wrong. So for me, I 0:35:34.239 --> 0:35:37.719 have nanny's, I have other people that do things in 0:35:37.760 --> 0:35:40.520 the house. I have like so much help, But I've 0:35:40.560 --> 0:35:43.560 never had a problem my whole life in asking for help. 0:35:43.600 --> 0:35:46.160 It's something that I do all the time. If I 0:35:46.200 --> 0:35:48.600 have a problem in my business, I'll call a competitor. 0:35:48.719 --> 0:35:51.600 If I can't figure something out, like I'm on the 0:35:51.680 --> 0:35:54.600 phone trying to work it through. And that becomes a 0:35:54.640 --> 0:35:58.360 pattern in your life, like asking for help, not comparing yourself. 0:35:58.640 --> 0:36:01.000 And so what I say to not just women, to 0:36:01.680 --> 0:36:04.399 everyone who's trying to figure out how to do all 0:36:04.400 --> 0:36:09.239 their stuff is work it out for yourself. Don't let 0:36:09.320 --> 0:36:12.319 the standards of what you see around you impede on 0:36:12.480 --> 0:36:16.399 how you feel, because the idea that anyone's got it 0:36:16.480 --> 0:36:21.080 all down is just fake, and I don't like that's 0:36:21.080 --> 0:36:25.160 the truth. Every single day, if you see me here, 0:36:25.800 --> 0:36:29.160 it means that my kids didn't have me at dinner tonight. 0:36:29.200 --> 0:36:31.680 If you see me here right now, it means that 0:36:31.719 --> 0:36:35.359 I'm giving something else up. And so my life is 0:36:35.400 --> 0:36:37.799 this series of trade offs. It is this series of 0:36:38.040 --> 0:36:40.879 I'm doing one thing. But I made this decision today 0:36:40.880 --> 0:36:42.120 because I was like, I want to go to Jay 0:36:42.120 --> 0:36:44.279 s Sheddy and talk to peoboss, you know, and it's like, 0:36:44.520 --> 0:36:46.799 and that's fine, but I don't feel bad about that. 0:36:46.840 --> 0:36:49.040 I'm not going to talture myself about it. But I 0:36:49.080 --> 0:36:52.560 think that we have to really look into ourselves and 0:36:52.640 --> 0:36:55.920 decide what's right for us and stop trying to chase 0:36:55.960 --> 0:37:00.680 this idea of balance, and also stop lying. You know, 0:37:00.840 --> 0:37:03.960 I just stopped lying about it. I started to say, 0:37:04.360 --> 0:37:08.719 this is really hard. I really have to make difficult choices. 0:37:08.920 --> 0:37:12.920 And when I made choices that were seemingly selfish or 0:37:12.960 --> 0:37:16.400 about me, I stopped hiding them because I thought that 0:37:16.600 --> 0:37:19.799 was doing a disservice to other women. So when I'm out, 0:37:19.880 --> 0:37:21.520 I'm going to say I'm out when I'm not with 0:37:21.560 --> 0:37:23.200 my kids. I'm going to say I'm not with my kids. 0:37:23.200 --> 0:37:25.160 When I say I only do school drop up twice 0:37:25.160 --> 0:37:27.680 a week, that's on a good week. So I'm just 0:37:27.680 --> 0:37:30.359 going to stop lying and everyone else comes fallow suit. 0:37:33.920 --> 0:37:36.480 You're changing the game, like you actually changed the game. 0:37:36.520 --> 0:37:38.600 And that's why I was so excited by the way. 0:37:38.640 --> 0:37:41.239 I was so excited because literally just a couple of 0:37:41.280 --> 0:37:45.640 weeks ago, Emma launched her own podcast, I Aspire with 0:37:45.719 --> 0:37:49.279 Emma Greed, and I want everyone in here to go 0:37:49.400 --> 0:37:51.680 on their Spotify or their Apple app or whatever app 0:37:51.719 --> 0:37:53.840 you use when you leave tonight, and I want you 0:37:53.880 --> 0:37:56.040 to go subscribe to Aspire by Emma Greed. 0:37:57.000 --> 0:37:57.759 You're so loud. 0:37:57.840 --> 0:38:00.560 If you're not already, I mean, I loved because I 0:38:00.680 --> 0:38:04.680 really feel like your voice in this space is so refreshing. 0:38:05.160 --> 0:38:10.240 It's so revolutionary. It's totally redefining what women can think about, 0:38:10.280 --> 0:38:14.960 of what's possible, what's expected of them, what's perfect, what's not, 0:38:15.120 --> 0:38:17.480 what's real. And I feel like you just being real 0:38:17.960 --> 0:38:21.520 and honest is genuinely what's needed in this space. I 0:38:21.520 --> 0:38:24.200 don't know anyone else who's doing it, and it's so 0:38:24.280 --> 0:38:25.800 It's something I love about you. I'm in awe of 0:38:25.840 --> 0:38:27.880 you and I admire it so so deeply. 0:38:27.920 --> 0:38:30.600 I mean it, No, I love it so Thanks Jay, 0:38:30.640 --> 0:38:33.600 I'll pull you later. I mean, I love you. But 0:38:33.719 --> 0:38:35.879 I have to tell everyone that on my first day 0:38:35.920 --> 0:38:38.919 of filming, I filmed with Jay and I wanted to die. 0:38:38.960 --> 0:38:42.120 I was like, why are you the first person I'm 0:38:42.160 --> 0:38:45.200 filming with? You know you because and I tell you why, 0:38:45.239 --> 0:38:47.600 because this is and it speaks so much to who 0:38:47.640 --> 0:38:49.920 you are, you know. I thought about my dream guests. 0:38:49.960 --> 0:38:51.440 I was like, who do I want to talk to it? 0:38:51.760 --> 0:38:53.600 And so I text Jay and I thought, you know what, 0:38:53.960 --> 0:38:56.279 He'll want to see the show and he'll watch a 0:38:56.320 --> 0:38:58.680 couple of episodes and maybe, if I'm super lucky, in 0:38:58.719 --> 0:39:00.640 like six or nine months, he'll come on the pod. 0:39:00.920 --> 0:39:03.520 But of course you were like, yeah, when should I come? 0:39:03.560 --> 0:39:06.520 And I was like, oh shit, I can't believe it. 0:39:06.760 --> 0:39:09.080 So you were the first person, which was so crazy. 0:39:09.120 --> 0:39:11.440 But you know, I'm really happy to be doing this 0:39:11.440 --> 0:39:15.719 thing because I've spent my entire career building businesses and 0:39:15.800 --> 0:39:18.719 after a while, you start to realize that as much 0:39:18.760 --> 0:39:22.239 as a solution you are, you're also part of the problem, right, 0:39:22.239 --> 0:39:24.799 You're part of the problem of what people look to 0:39:25.080 --> 0:39:28.240 and see sometimes as unattainable. And so what I wanted 0:39:28.280 --> 0:39:30.880 to do with this podcast was a start telling the truth, 0:39:31.440 --> 0:39:35.520 b to really talk about like what it takes, because 0:39:35.520 --> 0:39:39.120 I feel like there's so much toxic positivity out there 0:39:39.320 --> 0:39:41.879 and it's totally unhelpful for all of us. So I 0:39:41.920 --> 0:39:44.720 was like, I'm going to tell the truth. I'm gonna, 0:39:44.800 --> 0:39:47.800 you know, be me from East London, which means like 0:39:47.920 --> 0:39:51.400 really tell the truth, and you know, I'm going to 0:39:51.440 --> 0:39:54.719 get the people that I have worked so hard to 0:39:54.800 --> 0:39:57.600 get to know, because they will come on and they 0:39:57.680 --> 0:39:59.839 will speak to me in a way that perhaps they 0:40:00.360 --> 0:40:03.440 to somebody else. And it's been amazing because I really 0:40:03.480 --> 0:40:06.120 look at you know, we're all, in some way trying 0:40:06.120 --> 0:40:08.800 to build the life of our dreams. We're all trying 0:40:08.840 --> 0:40:12.360 to live out this idea of what we find aspiring. 0:40:12.680 --> 0:40:14.920 But it's different for different people, and we all have 0:40:14.960 --> 0:40:18.480 different opportunities. And the more I would go around this country, 0:40:18.600 --> 0:40:21.080 I get constantly stopped by people that would say to me, 0:40:21.520 --> 0:40:24.520 I've got two kids and I'm like thirty five, and 0:40:24.560 --> 0:40:26.640 I just want to change, and could you give me 0:40:26.719 --> 0:40:29.319 some advice? And I thought, wouldn't it be amazing if 0:40:29.320 --> 0:40:32.040 you could figure out how you could scale mentorship. And 0:40:32.080 --> 0:40:34.759 so for me, the idea was just that simple. Just 0:40:35.160 --> 0:40:39.000 have conversations, be really honest, talk to the people that 0:40:39.120 --> 0:40:43.520 I aspire to the most, and give people the tools 0:40:43.560 --> 0:40:45.799 so that they can make and build the life of 0:40:45.800 --> 0:40:49.200 their dreams. And it's honestly been like the biggest privilege 0:40:49.239 --> 0:40:51.840 because I feel like when you come at something with 0:40:52.440 --> 0:40:56.560 a really good intention, like unbelievable things happen. And it's 0:40:56.560 --> 0:40:59.480 only been I don't know. It's been like a couple 0:40:59.520 --> 0:41:01.640 of months filming, but I feel like it's been pretty 0:41:01.640 --> 0:41:04.839 magical and people are doing exactly that they're coming there, 0:41:05.120 --> 0:41:08.560 they're telling the truth and it's actually helping people. 0:41:09.480 --> 0:41:12.359 What more do you need? I love it. I love 0:41:12.400 --> 0:41:14.600 it all right. I want to take you up on that. 0:41:14.920 --> 0:41:17.080 I want to take you up on the Emma. I'm 0:41:17.080 --> 0:41:19.840 going to give someone a really special opportunity today, and 0:41:19.840 --> 0:41:21.600 therefore I want you to really honor it. If you 0:41:21.680 --> 0:41:24.719 raise your hand, I want it to be because you 0:41:24.800 --> 0:41:28.640 have something really valuable and something really thought through and 0:41:28.680 --> 0:41:32.480 something really mature in new idea, because I believe it's 0:41:32.480 --> 0:41:36.760 such a special opportunity. Tonight it's been all about doing things, 0:41:36.880 --> 0:41:39.680 not caring about what people think. To take your moment 0:41:39.800 --> 0:41:42.160 to make sure that you don't miss out to say 0:41:42.200 --> 0:41:46.120 I'll do that. As Emma taught us earlier, I want 0:41:46.160 --> 0:41:49.239 to give someone the opportunity in a moment to come 0:41:49.320 --> 0:41:54.520 up here and have sixty seconds to elevate a pitch 0:41:54.880 --> 0:41:59.200 their idea to the one and only Emma. So if 0:41:59.200 --> 0:42:04.760 anyone had a business idea, a dream for a business idea, company, AI, 0:42:04.920 --> 0:42:07.760 whatever it is, I want you to raise your hand. 0:42:08.320 --> 0:42:10.560 I'm taking a look around, raise your hand, raise your hand, 0:42:10.840 --> 0:42:13.000 and seeing a lot of people. This is great. I'm 0:42:13.000 --> 0:42:14.919 looking up there off the top. I see the light 0:42:14.960 --> 0:42:18.040 as well. I see the light as well. Let me go, 0:42:18.160 --> 0:42:19.520 let me go to it. I'm gonna come out and 0:42:19.520 --> 0:42:22.239 talk to it a reporter. That's so they won't say. 0:42:22.239 --> 0:42:24.600 I'm going to get up from the audience. Give it 0:42:24.680 --> 0:42:26.839 up for k everyone. 0:42:28.040 --> 0:42:33.560 Well done. I love it, so nice to meet you. Congratulations, 0:42:33.719 --> 0:42:36.200 well done for standing. I chose you because you stood up. 0:42:37.480 --> 0:42:39.719 Kate. I'm gonna ask you to come over here on 0:42:39.760 --> 0:42:43.799 our spot. This is for you. We're going to give 0:42:43.800 --> 0:42:48.480 you sixty seconds to share your elevator pitch to the 0:42:48.480 --> 0:42:51.800 one and only Emma Read and the audience of Hello. 0:42:52.760 --> 0:42:56.759 My name is Kate Wood. I'm from Reading, California. In 0:42:56.960 --> 0:43:02.040 twenty twenty, I had twins as well. About eight months later, 0:43:02.120 --> 0:43:05.480 I opened my first restaurant. About six weeks ago, I 0:43:05.560 --> 0:43:09.600 opened my second restaurant. But I've always had this. I've 0:43:09.600 --> 0:43:14.040 always had this dream to have a YouTube show and 0:43:14.080 --> 0:43:17.760 take it to the Food Network. My dream is to 0:43:17.800 --> 0:43:21.960 start a show called Stage and where you can either 0:43:22.040 --> 0:43:29.160 take celebrities or other people influencers, and each season would 0:43:29.200 --> 0:43:32.000 be that person and you put them in different spaces 0:43:32.040 --> 0:43:35.960 for an episode. So each episode would have an adventure challenge, 0:43:35.960 --> 0:43:38.279 it would have like a high end challenge, and it 0:43:38.320 --> 0:43:41.360 would also have something really like heartwarming. All in the 0:43:41.360 --> 0:43:45.880 food industry, we expose. You can expose meat packaging places, 0:43:45.920 --> 0:43:48.480 you could go into prisons, you could go to high 0:43:48.560 --> 0:43:53.480 end Michelin Star restaurants. But each episode, that celebrity or 0:43:53.520 --> 0:43:55.560 that person would be a stage and you'd have to 0:43:55.600 --> 0:43:59.480 take on those challenges. You'd have to step into that risk, 0:44:00.120 --> 0:44:03.399 have to expose different parts of this industry. And it's 0:44:03.440 --> 0:44:09.719 sort of this meeting between Triple D and Dirty Jobs, 0:44:10.000 --> 0:44:12.920 but all in the food industry, because it's such a 0:44:13.040 --> 0:44:15.880 huge industry that I love so much, and it takes 0:44:15.920 --> 0:44:19.440 so much every day for us to make this happen, 0:44:19.880 --> 0:44:23.760 and we all just love creating food and feeding people, 0:44:24.080 --> 0:44:25.960 and so I just thought it'd be a really lovely 0:44:26.120 --> 0:44:29.080 TV show idea, and I would have to take that 0:44:29.160 --> 0:44:30.360 first step to be a starch. 0:44:30.840 --> 0:44:34.080 And so that's my idea anyway, right not okay, everyone, 0:44:34.960 --> 0:44:40.840 thank you. It's amazing, amazing insight advice. Here we go, 0:44:40.960 --> 0:44:43.279 ready advice. So the first thing I want to say 0:44:43.480 --> 0:44:46.239 is I love that you stood because you were the 0:44:46.280 --> 0:44:48.839 first person that I saw, and that's why I was like, 0:44:48.880 --> 0:44:50.799 I'm going for you there, because you just stood out. 0:44:51.000 --> 0:44:53.399 So the idea that you would even put yourself out 0:44:53.400 --> 0:44:56.480 there in that way is a really big and important 0:44:56.480 --> 0:45:00.279 first step. Also, on restaurant number two, congratulations to you. 0:45:00.400 --> 0:45:04.000 That's like insane, insane, it really is. I think the 0:45:04.040 --> 0:45:06.719 beauty about the media climate and where we are right 0:45:06.760 --> 0:45:11.000 now is that you can do things in a really big, shiny, Netflix, 0:45:11.080 --> 0:45:15.200 big budget, beautiful way, or you can scale ideas down 0:45:15.280 --> 0:45:17.279 and you can test into them. And I think that 0:45:17.480 --> 0:45:20.560 one of the most amazing things that I've seen really 0:45:20.600 --> 0:45:23.920 really work in my career is when we've taken things 0:45:23.920 --> 0:45:27.440 that we thought had potential to be really big and 0:45:27.520 --> 0:45:31.239 really global and we've tested them on smaller platforms, like 0:45:31.600 --> 0:45:34.640 figuring something out on YouTube or figuring out like an 0:45:34.719 --> 0:45:38.080 Instagram version of what you're trying to do. Your idea 0:45:38.200 --> 0:45:41.360 is to take something you know, like a whole industry, 0:45:41.560 --> 0:45:44.120 and to go into somewhere you know, like the prisons 0:45:44.120 --> 0:45:46.319 that you mentioned or whatever it might be. But why 0:45:46.360 --> 0:45:48.839 would you not test that instead of with an influencer 0:45:49.200 --> 0:45:52.200 with one of your friends in a more localized situation 0:45:52.680 --> 0:45:56.160 and figure out how it works. Because there's some beauty 0:45:56.200 --> 0:45:58.319 to this idea of test and learn. One of the 0:45:58.360 --> 0:46:01.400 things that I want that thousand percent no as an 0:46:01.600 --> 0:46:04.520 entrepreneur is that you've just got to start. Like if 0:46:04.560 --> 0:46:07.400 you have figured it all out and you've written a 0:46:07.400 --> 0:46:10.279 big presentation and you're waiting for the one magical day 0:46:10.280 --> 0:46:12.440 that you're going to, you know, meet Ted Surrandos some 0:46:12.480 --> 0:46:15.279 pictures in Netflix like that day might never come, but 0:46:15.360 --> 0:46:17.600 you could get out of the starting block and just 0:46:17.760 --> 0:46:20.799 try something. And then the beauty of that is that 0:46:20.840 --> 0:46:22.719 you get to test and learn, and you fail and 0:46:22.760 --> 0:46:25.200 you iterate and you start again. So I would take 0:46:25.239 --> 0:46:29.040 this idea that you've got and extraculate the best pieces 0:46:29.080 --> 0:46:31.520 of it and try it in some really little small way, 0:46:31.600 --> 0:46:37.360 whatever you can. I will do it tomorrow. Tomorrow. Forget everyone, 0:46:41.480 --> 0:46:44.440 Thank you, it's very nice to meet. 0:46:45.840 --> 0:46:49.240 Bye, give it. I forget everyone. 0:46:49.680 --> 0:46:53.160 I don't believe we did that that. I can't believe 0:46:53.200 --> 0:46:53.640 we did that. 0:46:53.680 --> 0:46:57.160 I know that's much fun. It's like that. It's what 0:46:57.200 --> 0:46:59.880 you said, like someone saying, I'll do that. Raising a 0:47:00.080 --> 0:47:03.920 and Kate's courage and also just having a great idea, 0:47:04.000 --> 0:47:06.359 having a great thought, and and that advice you gave 0:47:06.520 --> 0:47:08.680 was spot on. I love the advice you gave. I 0:47:08.680 --> 0:47:13.600 think it's so valuable to hear that. It's interesting you 0:47:13.640 --> 0:47:17.040 said that when I first wanted this show to exist, 0:47:17.960 --> 0:47:21.680 I actually started on purpose because I pitched a TV 0:47:21.760 --> 0:47:26.160 show that got rejected. Now seven years ago, No, yeah, 0:47:26.320 --> 0:47:29.840 I had a TV show idea. I actually had the 0:47:29.880 --> 0:47:34.160 opportunity to pitch at Netflix and pitch at ABC and 0:47:34.200 --> 0:47:38.359 pitch at MTV was still around then. And did they 0:47:38.400 --> 0:47:41.360 turn you down and I got rejected? They rejected my 0:47:41.440 --> 0:47:46.000 TV show idea and so a podcast. Yes, yes, So 0:47:46.400 --> 0:47:48.640 you know, like, just just hearing that I gave me 0:47:48.719 --> 0:47:53.280 goosebumps because that was exactly what happened to me. Emma, 0:47:53.480 --> 0:47:56.520 you have been phenomenal tonight. You are truly one of 0:47:56.520 --> 0:48:01.520 my favorite people in the world. Everyone make sure you 0:48:01.560 --> 0:48:07.240 go and subscribe to Aspire with Emma Greed, Apple, Spotify, YouTube, 0:48:07.320 --> 0:48:09.960 all the platforms. Follow Emma on Instagram if you don't 0:48:10.000 --> 0:48:12.640 already give it up for Emma Reed. 0:48:14.200 --> 0:48:16.880 Thank you, thank you, thank you, You're the best. I 0:48:16.920 --> 0:48:17.399 love you. 0:48:17.960 --> 0:48:21.440 Thank you so much for listening to this conversation. If 0:48:21.480 --> 0:48:24.840 you enjoyed it, you'll love my chat with Adam Grant 0:48:25.160 --> 0:48:28.200 on why discomfort is the key to growth and the 0:48:28.280 --> 0:48:32.400 strategies for unlocking your hidden potential. If you know you 0:48:32.440 --> 0:48:35.040 want to be more and achieve more this year, go 0:48:35.160 --> 0:48:36.480 check it out right now. 0:48:36.680 --> 0:48:39.360 You set a goal today, you achieve it in six months, 0:48:39.760 --> 0:48:42.680 and then by the time it happens, it's almost a relief. 0:48:42.800 --> 0:48:44.360 There's no sense of meaning and purpose. 0:48:44.520 --> 0:48:46.200 You sort of expected it, and you would have been 0:48:46.239 --> 0:48:47.680 disappointed if it didn't happen.