1 00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:04,120 Speaker 1: Hello, Hello, Hi? Is this Lars? 2 00:00:05,880 --> 00:00:06,400 Speaker 2: It sure is? 3 00:00:07,600 --> 00:00:11,280 Speaker 1: How is life Lars? Uh? 4 00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:13,240 Speaker 2: Life is okay? 5 00:00:13,960 --> 00:00:14,040 Speaker 1: Is? 6 00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:15,360 Speaker 2: How is yours? 7 00:00:15,560 --> 00:00:15,880 Speaker 3: Man? 8 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:21,120 Speaker 1: Why? Why is life okay? Ish? 9 00:00:21,360 --> 00:00:21,599 Speaker 2: Well? 10 00:00:24,120 --> 00:00:26,200 Speaker 3: This year I was. 11 00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:31,840 Speaker 2: Uh, I just graduated from college and I got hired 12 00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:37,680 Speaker 2: at like my dream job, and I for an art teacher, 13 00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:44,360 Speaker 2: and I am non binary, and that was something kind 14 00:00:44,360 --> 00:00:51,320 Speaker 2: of private in my own life, and I dressed more masculinely, 15 00:00:51,400 --> 00:01:00,600 Speaker 2: I guess, And so the school district hired me obviously, 16 00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:04,319 Speaker 2: and it was going really really well, and I taught 17 00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:08,920 Speaker 2: for about three days, and the parents very wealthy. 18 00:01:08,959 --> 00:01:10,440 Speaker 3: It was a very wealthy school district. 19 00:01:12,160 --> 00:01:18,800 Speaker 2: They basically took one look at me and decided that 20 00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:21,520 Speaker 2: they weren't or I wasn't the look that they wanted 21 00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:26,520 Speaker 2: in their school district, and they found a way to 22 00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:30,920 Speaker 2: get me put on administrative leave. And I was just 23 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:34,679 Speaker 2: kind of disgraced from the area and discriminated against. 24 00:01:36,080 --> 00:01:41,000 Speaker 1: I'm sorry to hear that. How long were you teaching 25 00:01:41,080 --> 00:01:45,880 Speaker 1: there before that happens? 26 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:52,200 Speaker 2: I worked there for several months, but the kids came 27 00:01:52,240 --> 00:01:58,000 Speaker 2: back on a Wednesday, and by the next Monday, I 28 00:01:58,080 --> 00:01:59,840 Speaker 2: was already put on leave. 29 00:02:02,040 --> 00:02:05,960 Speaker 1: What did they tell you was the reason as to 30 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:10,400 Speaker 1: why they were putting you on leaves. 31 00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:16,960 Speaker 2: They actually had found my instagram, which was not connected 32 00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:21,040 Speaker 2: to my career as an educator like at all, and 33 00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:24,520 Speaker 2: it was my art instagram that I had when I 34 00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:27,280 Speaker 2: was in art school to become an art teacher, and 35 00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:36,440 Speaker 2: they basically went online found me somehow, and then like 36 00:02:36,480 --> 00:02:38,880 Speaker 2: there was it was a picture like three years ago, 37 00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:45,320 Speaker 2: fourth photo into a post of a charcoal nude that 38 00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:49,280 Speaker 2: I did, as you do in art school. Yes, and 39 00:02:49,639 --> 00:02:53,000 Speaker 2: this new drawing that I just happened to do, it 40 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:57,360 Speaker 2: just happens to be a transgender woman. And so I 41 00:02:57,440 --> 00:03:00,320 Speaker 2: drew returned to true deform. She had a you know, 42 00:03:00,520 --> 00:03:08,440 Speaker 2: her genitals and like a premature like breasts. And they 43 00:03:08,600 --> 00:03:14,880 Speaker 2: saw this photo and they started this rumor that I 44 00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:20,720 Speaker 2: was drying minors. And so I went into HR Monday 45 00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:24,119 Speaker 2: morning because they had called me in and they said 46 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:26,959 Speaker 2: that you know, the parents had called nine one one 47 00:03:27,120 --> 00:03:30,239 Speaker 2: saying that they're if their students were placed in my classroom, 48 00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:35,440 Speaker 2: then you know, they'd be in danger. And I was 49 00:03:35,480 --> 00:03:38,960 Speaker 2: put on leave right then and there like no questions 50 00:03:39,040 --> 00:03:43,200 Speaker 2: asked because I was a distraction. 51 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:49,720 Speaker 1: Now are you pursuing a lawsuit against the school. 52 00:03:52,760 --> 00:03:55,840 Speaker 2: I'm really really scared too. They said that I have 53 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:59,560 Speaker 2: grounds of defamation and all these things. But like, you know, 54 00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:02,720 Speaker 2: I've I met with a lawyer once and he basically 55 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:04,160 Speaker 2: told me, he was like, do you want to be 56 00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:08,000 Speaker 2: a poster child? And I was like, I don't know 57 00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:11,440 Speaker 2: if I can handle that. You know, all I wanted 58 00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:12,280 Speaker 2: to do is teach. 59 00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:19,040 Speaker 1: Okay, So you did have a consultation with a lawyer, 60 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:25,880 Speaker 1: I did, okay. And when they said to you, are 61 00:04:25,880 --> 00:04:29,720 Speaker 1: you sure you want to be a poster child? What 62 00:04:29,720 --> 00:04:30,320 Speaker 1: do you feel? 63 00:04:30,320 --> 00:04:30,400 Speaker 2: Like? 64 00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:36,000 Speaker 1: That meant, are you afraid of this becoming some form 65 00:04:36,120 --> 00:04:40,160 Speaker 1: of local or even national news? Are you like, what 66 00:04:41,440 --> 00:04:46,520 Speaker 1: in what you know of of the process of pursuing 67 00:04:46,560 --> 00:04:50,320 Speaker 1: this legally would be the things that you are afraid of. 68 00:04:51,839 --> 00:04:55,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's definitely it. It's well as of right now, 69 00:04:55,680 --> 00:04:59,480 Speaker 2: the district has done a okay job of keeping my 70 00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:02,719 Speaker 2: legal name out of it, the name I was going 71 00:05:02,960 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 2: as a teacher, you know. And but I mean there's 72 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:10,760 Speaker 2: still articles about this online and all these horrible things, 73 00:05:10,839 --> 00:05:12,400 Speaker 2: and I just know if my name was out there, 74 00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:15,160 Speaker 2: then like that would be it. And I don't even 75 00:05:15,200 --> 00:05:17,240 Speaker 2: know if I could teach after that, because who wants 76 00:05:17,320 --> 00:05:20,520 Speaker 2: to hire a teacher who's had their name dragged through 77 00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:20,880 Speaker 2: the mud. 78 00:05:21,560 --> 00:05:24,680 Speaker 1: Yeah, sure, sure, you said so. You said that there 79 00:05:24,720 --> 00:05:26,560 Speaker 1: are already articles out. 80 00:05:26,440 --> 00:05:29,280 Speaker 2: About this, there is? Yeah? 81 00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:30,520 Speaker 1: What? 82 00:05:30,839 --> 00:05:34,200 Speaker 2: How? Really? No? 83 00:05:34,360 --> 00:05:35,120 Speaker 1: Go ahead? 84 00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:39,039 Speaker 2: Well, I was gonna say, from like really like right 85 00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:45,360 Speaker 2: leaning articles that obviously are not favoring LGBTQ lives in 86 00:05:45,400 --> 00:05:46,080 Speaker 2: any sense. 87 00:05:46,839 --> 00:05:48,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what I was gonna ask you, is in 88 00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:57,160 Speaker 1: in what already exists? How do these articles paint you. 89 00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:59,200 Speaker 2: Like a groomer, like a a person that shouldn't be 90 00:05:59,240 --> 00:05:59,920 Speaker 2: around children. 91 00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:06,120 Speaker 1: Mm hmmm mm hmm mmmmm. Yeah, I can tell, I can, 92 00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:11,960 Speaker 1: I can. I can totally understand why you would not 93 00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:17,080 Speaker 1: want to pursue this. I mean, you're not here to 94 00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:20,480 Speaker 1: get into litigations with people or getting money out of people. 95 00:06:20,560 --> 00:06:21,839 Speaker 1: You're here to teach. 96 00:06:23,320 --> 00:06:26,000 Speaker 2: Exactly exactly. 97 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:29,359 Speaker 1: And these articles they don't they don't mention your real name. 98 00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:34,640 Speaker 2: Right right exactly or else they know that they'd be 99 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:40,640 Speaker 2: going against my leave or resignation or whatever is actually 100 00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:43,800 Speaker 2: in the books. Like they know that if they say 101 00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:47,159 Speaker 2: my name, my real name, then I mean, it'd be. 102 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:47,840 Speaker 3: A whole thing. 103 00:06:49,920 --> 00:06:53,320 Speaker 1: What are your friends and family telling you to do 104 00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:54,240 Speaker 1: about this situation? 105 00:06:56,279 --> 00:06:59,160 Speaker 2: Oh gosh, it's it's so mixed. You know, if I 106 00:06:59,240 --> 00:07:01,840 Speaker 2: if I tell someone out my situation, then they get 107 00:07:01,920 --> 00:07:04,160 Speaker 2: really heated and excited say we need to see it 108 00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:06,440 Speaker 2: and take down, like awfully can a tree like this? 109 00:07:07,520 --> 00:07:09,600 Speaker 2: And then there are people who have been, have been, 110 00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:13,239 Speaker 2: you know, sitting back on it with me saying like, dude, 111 00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:19,160 Speaker 2: like leave, move away, try something else, or you try 112 00:07:19,240 --> 00:07:23,320 Speaker 2: teaching somewhere else, like obviously, you know, not everywhere's going 113 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:25,080 Speaker 2: to shoot you like this. You know, I'm in a 114 00:07:25,160 --> 00:07:29,840 Speaker 2: red state, very red state, and you know, maybe if 115 00:07:29,880 --> 00:07:32,160 Speaker 2: I just go somewhere else and not get my name 116 00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:35,600 Speaker 2: out there, then I have a chance. But at this point, 117 00:07:35,640 --> 00:07:37,880 Speaker 2: I'm just I'm scared to do anything, like I just 118 00:07:37,960 --> 00:07:41,679 Speaker 2: don't even want to. I do want to teach still 119 00:07:42,240 --> 00:07:48,120 Speaker 2: in my heart, but I'm so anxious and nervous now 120 00:07:48,120 --> 00:07:49,640 Speaker 2: about everything m. 121 00:07:52,720 --> 00:07:55,440 Speaker 1: In What you've kind of been weighing around in your 122 00:07:55,560 --> 00:08:00,360 Speaker 1: mind between what you believe personally and what people you 123 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:03,920 Speaker 1: trust are telling you to do. What are what are 124 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,560 Speaker 1: some of the options that you've been considering as to 125 00:08:06,640 --> 00:08:07,640 Speaker 1: how you want to move forward. 126 00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:14,880 Speaker 2: I think the easy, the physically easiest thing it could 127 00:08:14,920 --> 00:08:21,200 Speaker 2: do is move on and move away and try to 128 00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:25,440 Speaker 2: teach in a place that's more welcoming of quote unquote 129 00:08:25,440 --> 00:08:32,960 Speaker 2: people like me. But the thing that would maybe help 130 00:08:33,080 --> 00:08:37,480 Speaker 2: me like spiritually, where it would be to get some 131 00:08:37,760 --> 00:08:40,520 Speaker 2: kind of justice out of this, even if it's like, 132 00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:44,160 Speaker 2: you know, the defamation case against the parents that made 133 00:08:44,200 --> 00:08:49,040 Speaker 2: up the horrible rumors, or the grandiose option of going 134 00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:52,040 Speaker 2: for the whole school district, which is sure probably the 135 00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:52,880 Speaker 2: scariest part. 136 00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:58,120 Speaker 1: Sure, sure, m. What can I ask? 137 00:08:58,200 --> 00:08:59,040 Speaker 4: What is in. 138 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:03,840 Speaker 1: Looking at the option of trying to get some kind 139 00:09:03,920 --> 00:09:08,880 Speaker 1: of justice? What is compelling you towards that option? 140 00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:16,920 Speaker 2: Just the fact that it still keeps me up at night. 141 00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:21,800 Speaker 2: It's been months, and you know, I am in real 142 00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:25,480 Speaker 2: therapy as well, and you know I've tried all these things, 143 00:09:26,559 --> 00:09:29,480 Speaker 2: but I still talk and turn about it. And it's 144 00:09:29,559 --> 00:09:32,640 Speaker 2: not fair that people can just rip the rug out 145 00:09:32,679 --> 00:09:35,240 Speaker 2: from underneath you. And again like this was my first 146 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:39,439 Speaker 2: job right out of school, Like I'm young, and I 147 00:09:39,920 --> 00:09:46,080 Speaker 2: this is my dream. So it's just it's just frustrating. 148 00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:49,319 Speaker 1: Could I ask if you're if you're cool for telling me, 149 00:09:49,559 --> 00:09:53,040 Speaker 1: what kinds of things has your reveal therapist told you 150 00:09:53,360 --> 00:09:56,000 Speaker 1: about this situation? And have they been helpful for you? 151 00:09:59,160 --> 00:09:59,360 Speaker 3: Yeah? 152 00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:03,400 Speaker 2: They've been really helpful, just trying to get me through 153 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:06,840 Speaker 2: day by day. At this point, when this first started happening, 154 00:10:06,920 --> 00:10:12,320 Speaker 2: you know, she was obviously very concerned and saying like, well, 155 00:10:12,480 --> 00:10:14,920 Speaker 2: you know, if you go to the court, they might 156 00:10:15,120 --> 00:10:18,240 Speaker 2: like bring me in because you know, the big thing 157 00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:22,280 Speaker 2: with the right is that they think that people of 158 00:10:23,480 --> 00:10:26,240 Speaker 2: varying genders are mentally ill, and so they would have 159 00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:31,000 Speaker 2: my therapists come in and all that. And she's tried 160 00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:34,240 Speaker 2: to like work me through some plans for that, which 161 00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:38,199 Speaker 2: is even more so scaring me away from legal action 162 00:10:38,320 --> 00:10:39,960 Speaker 2: because it's like I don't want to involve all these 163 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:45,559 Speaker 2: people in my life. But other than that, she would say, like, 164 00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:50,360 Speaker 2: you know, again, not everywhere is going to treat you 165 00:10:50,480 --> 00:10:52,880 Speaker 2: like this. This was a special case with the really 166 00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:56,959 Speaker 2: wealthy district and a really red area, and you know, 167 00:10:57,200 --> 00:11:02,040 Speaker 2: just trying to like tell me that there there's no 168 00:11:02,720 --> 00:11:07,720 Speaker 2: like there's there's still hope, right, But it's a different 169 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:11,120 Speaker 2: thing working through the trauma, I guess even though like 170 00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:16,839 Speaker 2: logically I'm like, yeah, it's fine, I'll be okay, but 171 00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:19,160 Speaker 2: people still hurt me. 172 00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:22,719 Speaker 1: Yeah, when you you said that it's a thing that's 173 00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:26,959 Speaker 1: keeping you up at night, yeah, exactly, what are what 174 00:11:27,160 --> 00:11:33,480 Speaker 1: are like the persistent thoughts at you know, whatever it 175 00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:38,240 Speaker 1: is three am that you're having about this whole situation. 176 00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:40,200 Speaker 1: What is like that one of the most more most 177 00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:41,160 Speaker 1: persistent things. 178 00:11:48,200 --> 00:11:53,000 Speaker 2: I guess it's it's the feeling of like, you know, 179 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:57,120 Speaker 2: I've always believed everything happens for a reason, and I've 180 00:11:57,200 --> 00:12:01,200 Speaker 2: thought like, well, maybe i got shoot away from teaching 181 00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:03,880 Speaker 2: because not meant to be a teacher, or maybe i 182 00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:07,560 Speaker 2: got shoot away from the area because I'm not supposed 183 00:12:07,559 --> 00:12:13,199 Speaker 2: to be here, which I already moved cities to pursue 184 00:12:13,320 --> 00:12:16,760 Speaker 2: this one job as is, and so to make another 185 00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:19,720 Speaker 2: big move is like a whole other journey. 186 00:12:20,520 --> 00:12:20,760 Speaker 1: Yeah. 187 00:12:21,360 --> 00:12:24,640 Speaker 2: But yeah, I'm just I'm I just been trying to 188 00:12:24,800 --> 00:12:29,480 Speaker 2: find a reason that just happened to me, just trying 189 00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:32,880 Speaker 2: to think not not you know, stay away from like 190 00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:34,920 Speaker 2: you know, I'm just not a good enough teacher because 191 00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:37,319 Speaker 2: I was. They were you know, my actual like Adaman 192 00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:38,880 Speaker 2: was like, you know, you're gonna be teacher of the year. 193 00:12:38,920 --> 00:12:41,679 Speaker 2: You're amazing, Like we love you. But it was just 194 00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:44,880 Speaker 2: the parents that they. 195 00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:46,760 Speaker 1: Looked, I'm glad you've I'm glad you feel that way. 196 00:12:48,640 --> 00:12:49,400 Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you. 197 00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:55,160 Speaker 1: Tell me let's talk about this for a second. Tell 198 00:12:55,240 --> 00:12:59,000 Speaker 1: me away from all of this, what made you want 199 00:12:59,080 --> 00:12:59,760 Speaker 1: to go be a teacher? 200 00:13:02,640 --> 00:13:05,720 Speaker 2: Uh, I'm super passionate about art, and I want people 201 00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:07,960 Speaker 2: to be passionate about art in their own lives because 202 00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:10,760 Speaker 2: it's through my other you know, things that happened to 203 00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:13,240 Speaker 2: me in my life, Like this has been my escape 204 00:13:13,320 --> 00:13:16,599 Speaker 2: through like traditional media or whatever. Art history. I'm a 205 00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:20,439 Speaker 2: big nerd about it and that was really exciting to me. 206 00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:24,160 Speaker 2: Like at the school I taught was was younger kids, 207 00:13:24,559 --> 00:13:27,680 Speaker 2: and just to see them like kind of like get 208 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:30,960 Speaker 2: a concept like that is like worth a whole day work. 209 00:13:31,040 --> 00:13:31,240 Speaker 2: You know. 210 00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:39,959 Speaker 1: Good, good, you know. I have a I have a 211 00:13:40,400 --> 00:13:43,719 Speaker 1: sort of a thought about this, which is like, you know, 212 00:13:43,880 --> 00:13:45,640 Speaker 1: kind of what you just told like like what you 213 00:13:45,840 --> 00:13:51,520 Speaker 1: just told me of you know, remove everything and just 214 00:13:51,880 --> 00:13:56,760 Speaker 1: like what is your passion? What do you want out 215 00:13:56,800 --> 00:14:01,800 Speaker 1: of life? What is important to you? And really like 216 00:14:03,120 --> 00:14:06,760 Speaker 1: like let everything go and just think about that in 217 00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:09,719 Speaker 1: a vacuum. And you know the things that you told me. 218 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:13,800 Speaker 1: I'm passionate about teaching. I'm passionate about art. I like 219 00:14:15,040 --> 00:14:19,320 Speaker 1: when when I get a kid to get something, you know, 220 00:14:19,880 --> 00:14:25,800 Speaker 1: and I would really think about that and then when 221 00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:29,200 Speaker 1: you bring everything back in and you're thinking about how 222 00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:31,600 Speaker 1: you want to move forward. Do I do a lawsuit? 223 00:14:31,760 --> 00:14:33,760 Speaker 1: Do I move do I do this? Do I do that? 224 00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:37,840 Speaker 1: I would think about the answers to those questions in 225 00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:46,880 Speaker 1: terms of which way forward best serves that passion. And 226 00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:48,560 Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't, I don't know the answer 227 00:14:48,600 --> 00:14:53,120 Speaker 1: to that question, but that's kind of the framework of 228 00:14:53,160 --> 00:14:55,160 Speaker 1: how I feel like I would think about that. 229 00:14:57,080 --> 00:15:00,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree. I think that's really enlightening actually, because 230 00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:05,000 Speaker 2: I mean, it gets so lost in all of that, right, like, yeah, 231 00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:07,840 Speaker 2: my original passion for everything, it's so lost. 232 00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:11,280 Speaker 1: Right, it gets lost. I mean, I'm sure there's feelings 233 00:15:11,360 --> 00:15:15,200 Speaker 1: of like, you know, feeling like you need to be 234 00:15:15,600 --> 00:15:18,480 Speaker 1: a voice for other people, or that you need to 235 00:15:18,640 --> 00:15:22,480 Speaker 1: do this, or you know, I don't, I don't know. 236 00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:24,120 Speaker 1: I don't know what all the sort of thoughts you 237 00:15:24,280 --> 00:15:28,080 Speaker 1: you might be having, But I can see how they 238 00:15:28,560 --> 00:15:33,240 Speaker 1: would take you away from what the core was of 239 00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,640 Speaker 1: why you were doing all of this in the first place. 240 00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:42,360 Speaker 1: And I would hope that you really operate out of 241 00:15:42,480 --> 00:15:44,640 Speaker 1: that core because it's so easy in talking to the 242 00:15:44,720 --> 00:15:47,280 Speaker 1: lawyer and talking to your friends who are getting heated 243 00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:50,280 Speaker 1: to and talking to other people in the care It's 244 00:15:50,320 --> 00:15:53,080 Speaker 1: just it's just so many things that are gonna take 245 00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:56,560 Speaker 1: you away from the core of I'm passionate about art, 246 00:15:57,000 --> 00:16:00,280 Speaker 1: I'm passionate about teaching, and I want to move forward 247 00:16:00,320 --> 00:16:04,000 Speaker 1: in a direction in my life that best serves those passions. 248 00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:08,200 Speaker 1: And I hope that as you're figuring all this stuff out, 249 00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:12,680 Speaker 1: you're not letting yourself get too dragged away from that. 250 00:16:14,960 --> 00:16:17,520 Speaker 2: Absolutely, I really needed to hear that, Hyle. 251 00:16:17,600 --> 00:16:22,080 Speaker 1: Thank you, good good and I'm sorry again that this 252 00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:26,200 Speaker 1: happened to you and I and I I hope that 253 00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:35,320 Speaker 1: you know, I hope that, like I said, you know, 254 00:16:35,720 --> 00:16:40,240 Speaker 1: people being however they're going to be, is not dragging 255 00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:44,560 Speaker 1: you away from from the passions that you have in life. 256 00:16:46,160 --> 00:16:47,600 Speaker 2: Absolutely, thank you very much. 257 00:16:49,360 --> 00:16:52,080 Speaker 1: Thanks for sharing all of this with us, Lars. I 258 00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:53,840 Speaker 1: know this is a is a tough thing for you. 259 00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:58,120 Speaker 1: Is there any other aspect of this or anything at 260 00:16:58,160 --> 00:17:01,360 Speaker 1: all that you want to say to me or to 261 00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:04,000 Speaker 1: the people of the computer before we go. 262 00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:10,280 Speaker 2: Unfortunately, through all this, I've learned of a lot of 263 00:17:10,400 --> 00:17:13,479 Speaker 2: horse stories that have happened to young teachers. Even though 264 00:17:13,520 --> 00:17:17,240 Speaker 2: our country is begging and yearning for more teachers. We're 265 00:17:17,280 --> 00:17:19,920 Speaker 2: still pushing them away, and I just want to talk 266 00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:24,960 Speaker 2: to other disgraced teachers and tell them, well, what what 267 00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:30,400 Speaker 2: you said is, don't lose your passion, and there's there's 268 00:17:30,560 --> 00:17:32,800 Speaker 2: got to be, you know, a way that we can 269 00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:35,560 Speaker 2: still be in the field and do what we want 270 00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:38,640 Speaker 2: to do because they do need us at. 271 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:39,160 Speaker 3: The end of the day. 272 00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:43,879 Speaker 1: Thank you very much for calling and sharing Lars. Good 273 00:17:43,920 --> 00:17:44,200 Speaker 1: luck to you. 274 00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:46,400 Speaker 2: Thank you so much. 275 00:17:46,720 --> 00:17:48,400 Speaker 1: Have a great day, Lyle you too. 276 00:17:49,840 --> 00:17:50,080 Speaker 2: Bye. 277 00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:51,240 Speaker 3: Mm. 278 00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:56,080 Speaker 1: Wow, that was a that was a tough one. Yeah, 279 00:17:56,119 --> 00:17:58,360 Speaker 1: shout out to Lars. I'm sorry that that happened to them, 280 00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:05,359 Speaker 1: But they did say that thing of what they like 281 00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:09,560 Speaker 1: that was. I think what I picked up on in 282 00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:13,720 Speaker 1: when they were talking was when Lars was like, I 283 00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:16,119 Speaker 1: know I'm a good teacher. I know I did a 284 00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:18,919 Speaker 1: good job. I know I'm good at it. And they 285 00:18:18,960 --> 00:18:23,359 Speaker 1: said to that very confidently just now, and I was 286 00:18:23,520 --> 00:18:27,080 Speaker 1: glad to hear that, because, you know, through all of this, 287 00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:31,320 Speaker 1: the confidence and certainty that they had in their own 288 00:18:31,400 --> 00:18:34,560 Speaker 1: abilities to do the thing that they like to do 289 00:18:35,359 --> 00:18:41,640 Speaker 1: appears to not have been rattled too heavily, which is great. 290 00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:48,760 Speaker 1: So I hope they move forward again in the direction 291 00:18:49,080 --> 00:18:53,600 Speaker 1: that best suits them. I can understand again the multitude 292 00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:58,320 Speaker 1: of ways that with the freaking news and this and that, 293 00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:00,760 Speaker 1: and your friends, who are you do this thing that 294 00:19:00,840 --> 00:19:02,760 Speaker 1: you're people were telling you to do the other thing? 295 00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:04,400 Speaker 1: I can see how you can kind of get away 296 00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:09,880 Speaker 1: from yourself. And I hope that doesn't happen to Lars, 297 00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:12,120 Speaker 1: and it sounds like it won't. I think they're gonna 298 00:19:12,119 --> 00:19:17,320 Speaker 1: be okay. I hope Hello, Hello, David. How's it going, man? 299 00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:18,760 Speaker 1: What's what's what's life like? 300 00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:28,200 Speaker 5: Life is good. I'm just just living, working, trying to 301 00:19:28,240 --> 00:19:30,320 Speaker 5: make the best out of it. How's your life going? 302 00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:34,119 Speaker 1: Is there anything in particular that you called in to 303 00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:34,760 Speaker 1: talk about? 304 00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:37,200 Speaker 2: Yeah? 305 00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:46,640 Speaker 5: So, man, it's kind of embarrassing. But back in the day, 306 00:19:47,680 --> 00:19:50,920 Speaker 5: when I was in middle school, around twelve years old, 307 00:19:54,119 --> 00:20:01,520 Speaker 5: my buddies and I probably around seven guys collected our 308 00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:07,560 Speaker 5: pee in so you know those like Arizona gallon jugs, 309 00:20:07,880 --> 00:20:16,000 Speaker 5: like Arizona t gallon jugs. Yes, So it all started 310 00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:18,639 Speaker 5: because he didn't have a bathroom in his basement, right, 311 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:24,800 Speaker 5: and uh, one day he had to go pee and 312 00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:26,600 Speaker 5: we have this gallon jug and he's like, oh, I 313 00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:30,719 Speaker 5: was pissing this we did, and then one thing led 314 00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:34,879 Speaker 5: to another, and then I pissed in it, and then 315 00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:38,320 Speaker 5: a couple other people did, and then it got to 316 00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:46,680 Speaker 5: the point where we had probably like six gallon jugs 317 00:20:48,440 --> 00:21:00,280 Speaker 5: of of piss in his basement. And then after a 318 00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:05,560 Speaker 5: few months, then I'm saying this, like, in my head, 319 00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:08,119 Speaker 5: it didn't seem that bad, but as I'm talking about it, 320 00:21:08,320 --> 00:21:17,160 Speaker 5: it sounds like really fucking bad. But after a few months, 321 00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:24,280 Speaker 5: we dumped it off of a bridge in our hometown. 322 00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:38,600 Speaker 1: You dumped it off of a bridge, Yeah, I did 323 00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:43,080 Speaker 1: it get on anyone or anything, No, it. 324 00:21:43,200 --> 00:21:45,840 Speaker 5: Was it was kind of an abandoned bridge over just 325 00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:51,840 Speaker 5: a forested area. But it smelled pretty bad. That was 326 00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:53,480 Speaker 5: a key factor. 327 00:21:55,359 --> 00:21:58,680 Speaker 1: How long did you guys keep the bottles before you 328 00:21:58,800 --> 00:21:59,760 Speaker 1: decided to dump them? 329 00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:04,400 Speaker 5: It was a long time ago, but I'm pretty sure 330 00:22:04,520 --> 00:22:07,240 Speaker 5: it was a couple of months, Like probably like at 331 00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:12,800 Speaker 5: least two of them were a couple months old, Like 332 00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:18,280 Speaker 5: they got to the point where they smelled like like pneumonia. 333 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:24,960 Speaker 1: What was it that convinced you to finally dump them 334 00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:25,840 Speaker 1: after two months? 335 00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:31,000 Speaker 5: Well, we were storing them in like a rubber made 336 00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:39,840 Speaker 5: toat you know, and eventually the tote was full, and 337 00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:43,879 Speaker 5: then we thought to ourselves, you know, maybe maybe this 338 00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:48,800 Speaker 5: tradition has gone on long enough and we should. 339 00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:49,080 Speaker 4: Get rid of it. 340 00:22:51,240 --> 00:22:53,680 Speaker 1: What do you feel like you learned from this situation. 341 00:22:59,359 --> 00:23:03,280 Speaker 5: That hive mind is a real thing and when enough 342 00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:09,280 Speaker 5: close friends or anyone that have the same goal put 343 00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:13,800 Speaker 5: their heads together, they can really accomplish something pointless. 344 00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:21,080 Speaker 1: Do you feel like this has brought you closer together 345 00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:21,840 Speaker 1: with your friends? 346 00:23:23,560 --> 00:23:23,720 Speaker 2: Oh? 347 00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:30,840 Speaker 5: Yeah, sometimes, I mean the main people involved. We did 348 00:23:30,880 --> 00:23:33,200 Speaker 5: a lot of stupid shit during that time in our lives, 349 00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:36,920 Speaker 5: but we're all still friends and sometimes we'll reminisce about 350 00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:44,560 Speaker 5: the really embarrassing stupid shit that we did, and only 351 00:23:44,640 --> 00:23:45,600 Speaker 5: we really know about it. 352 00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:46,840 Speaker 4: And now you know about it. 353 00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:51,639 Speaker 1: How do you feel that other people not know about this? 354 00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:57,480 Speaker 5: How do I feel about other people not knowing about it? 355 00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:00,800 Speaker 1: How do you feel about other people knowing about this? 356 00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:02,400 Speaker 4: Oh? 357 00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:03,359 Speaker 5: Knowing about it? 358 00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:04,640 Speaker 2: Man? 359 00:24:04,760 --> 00:24:07,000 Speaker 5: I mean, this is the only time I've talked about 360 00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:11,000 Speaker 5: it with anyone other than my friends. Like when I 361 00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:15,919 Speaker 5: told the call screener, it just felt kind of icky 362 00:24:16,119 --> 00:24:17,119 Speaker 5: coming out of my mouth. 363 00:24:18,600 --> 00:24:21,760 Speaker 1: Mhm. Has as talking about it given you a different 364 00:24:21,800 --> 00:24:22,480 Speaker 1: perspective on it? 365 00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:29,639 Speaker 5: Yeah, I kind of I knew it was pretty weird, 366 00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:31,560 Speaker 5: but now I feel like it's really weird. Like I'm 367 00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:35,720 Speaker 5: a normal guy, but you know, like middle school age. 368 00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:37,600 Speaker 4: Stuff is always really weird. 369 00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:40,480 Speaker 1: You know, I'm gonna tell you, I'm gonna about it. 370 00:24:41,080 --> 00:24:46,600 Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you something because you gave us this, David, 371 00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:49,920 Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'm gonna give you something, all right. I 372 00:24:49,960 --> 00:24:52,040 Speaker 1: don't know if I've talked about this before, but I 373 00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:58,040 Speaker 1: I was involved in a Jewish youth group in high 374 00:24:58,080 --> 00:25:03,760 Speaker 1: school that was about fifteen years old, and we had 375 00:25:03,800 --> 00:25:09,240 Speaker 1: there was like a retreat at a hotel, and I 376 00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:14,120 Speaker 1: once peed in a coffee cup. Wait, no, it wasn't 377 00:25:14,160 --> 00:25:15,440 Speaker 1: a coffee cup. It was a clean It was like 378 00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:18,960 Speaker 1: a glass cup. I once peed in a glass cup 379 00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:25,320 Speaker 1: and then left it on a coffee table in the 380 00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:28,080 Speaker 1: lobby of the hotel. 381 00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:34,320 Speaker 5: Oh no, wait, where did you pee in it? 382 00:25:34,520 --> 00:25:37,080 Speaker 4: Originally I think. 383 00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:38,320 Speaker 1: I might have taken it to the bad I think 384 00:25:38,320 --> 00:25:41,560 Speaker 1: I probably took it to the bathroom and peed in 385 00:25:41,680 --> 00:25:44,040 Speaker 1: it and then left it on a coffee table in 386 00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:45,080 Speaker 1: the middle of the hotel. 387 00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:52,520 Speaker 5: Okay, I've never seen you outside of your gecko costume. 388 00:25:52,880 --> 00:25:56,080 Speaker 5: So even though you're fifteen I'm still imagining you in 389 00:25:56,160 --> 00:25:56,720 Speaker 5: your get. 390 00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:58,879 Speaker 1: Go, just as a younger Gecko doing that. 391 00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:02,720 Speaker 5: Yeah, just like walking into this hotel, Bobby. 392 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:05,000 Speaker 1: I feel like that might have made it worse flat. 393 00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:10,800 Speaker 5: Yeah, I just hope no one picked it up and 394 00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:14,520 Speaker 5: I thought it was their apple juice. 395 00:26:14,359 --> 00:26:14,960 Speaker 4: That they left. 396 00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:21,080 Speaker 1: Well, you know, hoping is all you can really do. 397 00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:26,080 Speaker 5: Thanks for sharing that, though. It makes me feel slightly 398 00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:29,880 Speaker 5: less downcast about what I did back in the day. 399 00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:32,760 Speaker 1: David, is there anything else you want to say to 400 00:26:32,800 --> 00:26:34,080 Speaker 1: the people of the computer before we go. 401 00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:36,480 Speaker 4: Now? 402 00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:38,560 Speaker 5: I just want to say I saw you in Chicago. Man, 403 00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:40,400 Speaker 5: that was a really awesome show. 404 00:26:41,200 --> 00:26:44,920 Speaker 1: Hell yeah, beautiful. Ah, that's sick. 405 00:26:46,240 --> 00:26:49,520 Speaker 5: I wasn't expecting that venue to be that that, Like 406 00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:51,280 Speaker 5: this the room to be that small. 407 00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:51,960 Speaker 2: It was cool. 408 00:26:53,080 --> 00:26:54,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, that was great. I love that n That was 409 00:26:54,960 --> 00:26:57,840 Speaker 1: super intimate. People were like right up against the stage. 410 00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:01,560 Speaker 1: People really shared some ship that night. It was great. 411 00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:04,280 Speaker 1: I'm loving doing those live shows. I'll be back. I'll 412 00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:09,400 Speaker 1: be back in Chicago next year. Awesome, I'll see that beautiful. 413 00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:09,960 Speaker 1: Thank you, David. 414 00:27:11,640 --> 00:27:11,920 Speaker 4: Thanks. 415 00:27:16,480 --> 00:27:18,800 Speaker 1: Uh you know, listen, I I feel like so many 416 00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:23,200 Speaker 1: people come to me with pissed stories. What kind of 417 00:27:23,240 --> 00:27:25,720 Speaker 1: guy would I be if I didn't return one of 418 00:27:25,840 --> 00:27:28,639 Speaker 1: my own Hello? Hi, how are you? 419 00:27:29,119 --> 00:27:29,879 Speaker 3: I'm good? How are you? 420 00:27:30,600 --> 00:27:31,240 Speaker 1: What is your name? 421 00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:36,399 Speaker 3: My name is Jules. I'm low key, very fucking shocked 422 00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:38,960 Speaker 3: right now and a little excited. 423 00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:41,920 Speaker 1: Just be in the moment with me. This is it. 424 00:27:42,080 --> 00:27:43,920 Speaker 1: This is right now. You're on the phone with a gecko. 425 00:27:45,920 --> 00:27:48,720 Speaker 1: I am on a phone with and we we need 426 00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:52,040 Speaker 1: to we need to squeeze this and make it the 427 00:27:52,119 --> 00:27:55,520 Speaker 1: most it possibly can be. Jules, what's going on? 428 00:27:58,119 --> 00:27:58,720 Speaker 4: What is going on? 429 00:27:58,920 --> 00:28:01,400 Speaker 3: Is I am nineteen and married to my best friend 430 00:28:01,440 --> 00:28:06,320 Speaker 3: of twenty one? You know the idea of like everybody 431 00:28:06,400 --> 00:28:08,600 Speaker 3: talks about or jokes about getting married to like their 432 00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:12,040 Speaker 3: best friend if they don't get married by a certain age. Well, 433 00:28:12,119 --> 00:28:15,000 Speaker 3: me and my friend are actually doing it. This is 434 00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:15,600 Speaker 3: a little joke. 435 00:28:16,440 --> 00:28:19,399 Speaker 1: I feel like you picked a too young for an age. 436 00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:22,840 Speaker 1: I feel like you picked a little too young. I 437 00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:24,359 Speaker 1: understand I picked too. 438 00:28:24,280 --> 00:28:28,879 Speaker 3: Young of an age, but this is more so me 439 00:28:28,960 --> 00:28:32,399 Speaker 3: and my friend after a late workshift, we're talking about 440 00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:37,680 Speaker 3: how most marriages end in divorce, over half do in America. 441 00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:43,680 Speaker 3: So our conclusion was because everybody doesn't take a practice 442 00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:46,520 Speaker 3: run at marriage before they get married. For the first time. 443 00:28:47,120 --> 00:28:50,320 Speaker 3: So we decided to be each other's practice run of marriage. 444 00:28:50,800 --> 00:28:54,600 Speaker 3: We've applied for the license. Our wedding date is actually 445 00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:57,520 Speaker 3: going to be February third, twenty twenty three, so we 446 00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:03,160 Speaker 3: have a two three going. Neither one of our parents 447 00:29:03,280 --> 00:29:08,960 Speaker 3: know we bought each other rings. I'm pretty we We 448 00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:11,400 Speaker 3: did get a little bit of cold feet a couple 449 00:29:11,400 --> 00:29:15,480 Speaker 3: of days after we bought the marriage license, but we've 450 00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:18,240 Speaker 3: decided to like fully commit and we are going to 451 00:29:18,320 --> 00:29:18,560 Speaker 3: do it. 452 00:29:19,960 --> 00:29:25,320 Speaker 1: So yeah, uh so you are committing to a practice run. 453 00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:29,840 Speaker 3: Of marriage to my best friends. 454 00:29:31,240 --> 00:29:36,400 Speaker 1: And how is this a practice if you're actually getting married? 455 00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:42,560 Speaker 3: Well, it's uh, I think it's a good practice run 456 00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:47,360 Speaker 3: because we love each other. We get to practice like 457 00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:51,000 Speaker 3: the actual ceremony part, the paperwork and all of that, 458 00:29:51,320 --> 00:29:55,680 Speaker 3: and then being together having to jointly file taxes and 459 00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:58,520 Speaker 3: all of that is a good practice run. And then 460 00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:03,320 Speaker 3: we get a practice run of divorcing when time comes 461 00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:07,360 Speaker 3: to be for when we actually marry the people we. 462 00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:07,920 Speaker 4: Want to marry. 463 00:30:09,080 --> 00:30:15,480 Speaker 1: Okay, so you are getting married. You're getting actually married. Yes, 464 00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:21,120 Speaker 1: you are codifying it into law that you are married. 465 00:30:21,160 --> 00:30:23,920 Speaker 1: You're filing your taxes together, and you are doing so 466 00:30:25,840 --> 00:30:30,920 Speaker 1: with the full knowledge that you plan on getting divorced 467 00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:42,240 Speaker 1: at some point. Yes, okay, Now what how long do 468 00:30:42,320 --> 00:30:44,160 Speaker 1: you think you'll get married? How long do you think 469 00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:45,640 Speaker 1: you'll be married for before the divorce? 470 00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:51,200 Speaker 3: Well, I asked about I asked her this, and she 471 00:30:51,520 --> 00:30:53,680 Speaker 3: did leave me on red and then the next day 472 00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:58,440 Speaker 3: responded that she forgot to respond back to the text. 473 00:30:59,240 --> 00:31:02,160 Speaker 3: But we we talked about it more in person, and 474 00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:06,040 Speaker 3: it was about a ten to eleven year run we 475 00:31:06,160 --> 00:31:06,800 Speaker 3: were planning on. 476 00:31:10,360 --> 00:31:14,280 Speaker 1: So you were planning on getting married with a ten 477 00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:15,600 Speaker 1: year expiration date? 478 00:31:18,240 --> 00:31:20,640 Speaker 3: Yes, with a ten year expiration date. 479 00:31:21,000 --> 00:31:22,680 Speaker 1: Well, you know, I'll tell you this. I like the 480 00:31:22,840 --> 00:31:26,920 Speaker 1: idea that you put a ten years on You put 481 00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:29,720 Speaker 1: ten years on it, and then at ten years you go, 482 00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:31,960 Speaker 1: it's almost like it's a contract. I mean it is 483 00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:35,640 Speaker 1: a contract. I think, uh where at the end of 484 00:31:35,720 --> 00:31:37,760 Speaker 1: ten years you're like, all right, should we renew or 485 00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:40,360 Speaker 1: should we just call it quits? 486 00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:47,360 Speaker 3: Basicly, and our whole thing was like, well not even 487 00:31:47,440 --> 00:31:49,720 Speaker 3: our whole thing, A lot of our friends things was like, 488 00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:53,680 Speaker 3: how are you going to prove this if it's like 489 00:31:53,840 --> 00:31:57,240 Speaker 3: taken to court like that? Were like being like doing 490 00:31:57,360 --> 00:32:00,960 Speaker 3: fraud for taxes We've known each other for fourteen years, 491 00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:03,239 Speaker 3: and I'd say of those fourteen years of fall at 492 00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:05,920 Speaker 3: ten of those we've been very best close friends. So 493 00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:08,920 Speaker 3: we have text messages, photos, all of those types of 494 00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:11,920 Speaker 3: things to like prove our quote unquote love. And also 495 00:32:12,320 --> 00:32:15,760 Speaker 3: since Wynda's marriage, say that it has to be romantic 496 00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:18,560 Speaker 3: love and that it can't be platonic love. You know, 497 00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:22,120 Speaker 3: me and her are very very good platonic lovers. 498 00:32:22,600 --> 00:32:27,720 Speaker 1: I feel like, so, Jules, you're not committing fraud. 499 00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:33,600 Speaker 3: See, And that's what I was telling people, that I 500 00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:36,840 Speaker 3: was not committing tax fraud. We were getting legitimately married, 501 00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:38,440 Speaker 3: we are legitimately together. 502 00:32:41,680 --> 00:32:44,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, I the fraud thing is not the thing that 503 00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:48,840 Speaker 1: I'm I'm interested in here. Well, do you have any 504 00:32:49,600 --> 00:32:51,840 Speaker 1: do you have any concerns about this at all? 505 00:32:55,760 --> 00:32:59,959 Speaker 3: I do have some concerns. I'm concerned that she might 506 00:33:00,400 --> 00:33:05,440 Speaker 3: just be she might just be plotting my death in 507 00:33:05,520 --> 00:33:08,720 Speaker 3: the future to take all my money and that would 508 00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:10,640 Speaker 3: be like guaranteed with us being marriaged and all of that. 509 00:33:11,160 --> 00:33:13,480 Speaker 3: But she did just put me on her four oh 510 00:33:13,520 --> 00:33:18,680 Speaker 3: one k as her beneficiary primary one, so like that 511 00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:24,520 Speaker 3: kind of killed my my only relief concern. 512 00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:27,440 Speaker 1: So you could kill her for her money just as 513 00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:31,960 Speaker 1: much as she could kill you for yours. Yes, okay, 514 00:33:32,400 --> 00:33:36,960 Speaker 1: I suppose that love is the playing field. Okay, do 515 00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:38,240 Speaker 1: you have any other concerns about this? 516 00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:44,800 Speaker 3: Probably just how my parents are going to react, because 517 00:33:45,040 --> 00:33:47,280 Speaker 3: me and this girl have been best friends. She actually 518 00:33:47,320 --> 00:33:48,959 Speaker 3: lived with me and my parents for a little bit. 519 00:33:50,360 --> 00:33:52,920 Speaker 3: But my concern is how they're going to react. I 520 00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:54,760 Speaker 3: feel like they're going to be like this is stupid 521 00:33:55,280 --> 00:33:59,400 Speaker 3: and not understand like that it's a good practice run. 522 00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:08,200 Speaker 1: I feel like, so, are you concerned at all with 523 00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:14,440 Speaker 1: what might happen if your relationship with your friend, uh, 524 00:34:15,280 --> 00:34:18,960 Speaker 1: you know, takes a hit in any way and now 525 00:34:19,120 --> 00:34:25,600 Speaker 1: your your finances are fully entangled with them. Oh and 526 00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:27,960 Speaker 1: and that is a that is a difficult thing to navigate, 527 00:34:31,200 --> 00:34:31,520 Speaker 1: you know what. 528 00:34:31,840 --> 00:34:35,360 Speaker 3: I didn't give that any thought. I felt like me 529 00:34:35,520 --> 00:34:40,480 Speaker 3: and my friend's relationship our track records. While it hasn't 530 00:34:40,520 --> 00:34:47,000 Speaker 3: been like the cleanest relationship, it's been very devoted relationship. 531 00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:52,280 Speaker 3: We've fought often, we've gone a few months without talking, 532 00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:56,160 Speaker 3: but we've always somehow come back around to patching things up. 533 00:34:58,920 --> 00:35:02,359 Speaker 1: Just tell me again, and what your motivation for doing 534 00:35:02,440 --> 00:35:02,719 Speaker 1: this is? 535 00:35:05,080 --> 00:35:08,200 Speaker 3: My motivation to get married to my friend was to 536 00:35:08,360 --> 00:35:10,520 Speaker 3: give marriage a practice round? 537 00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:16,680 Speaker 1: Can I can? I? Can I tell you something though, Yes, 538 00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:22,560 Speaker 1: what you're describing is not a practice. It's it is. 539 00:35:23,600 --> 00:35:26,840 Speaker 1: You are getting married. You're not practicing getting married. You 540 00:35:26,960 --> 00:35:32,240 Speaker 1: are getting married practicing it would be pretending to get married. 541 00:35:33,239 --> 00:35:36,080 Speaker 1: There's no pretending or practicing. This is your going out 542 00:35:36,120 --> 00:35:38,560 Speaker 1: on the field and doing it. This is not a 543 00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:43,080 Speaker 1: practice if you're actually getting married. This is you getting married. 544 00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:45,960 Speaker 2: To me. 545 00:35:46,080 --> 00:35:50,680 Speaker 3: It's a practice because it's to a friend. But I 546 00:35:50,800 --> 00:35:53,960 Speaker 3: see your point of it not being practiced because it 547 00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:56,800 Speaker 3: is not pretend. It is real. So this is I 548 00:35:56,920 --> 00:35:58,600 Speaker 3: really try at marriage. 549 00:35:59,239 --> 00:36:01,880 Speaker 1: Well, ideally you're always getting married to a friend. 550 00:36:08,080 --> 00:36:08,720 Speaker 4: This is true. 551 00:36:08,960 --> 00:36:11,520 Speaker 3: This should be a vital thing. 552 00:36:13,480 --> 00:36:15,239 Speaker 1: I don't listen, Jules. I'm not here to tell you 553 00:36:15,320 --> 00:36:18,279 Speaker 1: what to do with your life. But I don't can 554 00:36:18,320 --> 00:36:20,680 Speaker 1: I How many how many people have you? How many 555 00:36:20,719 --> 00:36:22,879 Speaker 1: people have you ran this by in your life? 556 00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:25,920 Speaker 2: How many people have. 557 00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:34,040 Speaker 3: I ran this by? I've personally told three people in person, 558 00:36:34,480 --> 00:36:37,960 Speaker 3: and I've like hinted towards it on my social media. 559 00:36:38,160 --> 00:36:41,839 Speaker 3: But the only like real heart to heart conversation I've 560 00:36:41,880 --> 00:36:44,840 Speaker 3: had about it was probably with the person I'm getting 561 00:36:44,840 --> 00:36:45,200 Speaker 3: married to. 562 00:36:46,239 --> 00:36:49,719 Speaker 1: Okay, again, I'm not here to burst your butt or 563 00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:53,400 Speaker 1: tell you what to do with your life, but I 564 00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:56,880 Speaker 1: guess I'm having trouble seeing how this is a practice 565 00:36:57,040 --> 00:37:01,080 Speaker 1: when you are just fully straight up getting married. 566 00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:08,240 Speaker 3: To me, it's a practice because it's like the friend. 567 00:37:08,719 --> 00:37:10,840 Speaker 3: It's like the joke that everybody talks about, but like 568 00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:15,200 Speaker 3: us actually doing it and like getting the knowledge of, 569 00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:18,680 Speaker 3: like the actual marriage ceremony, the divorce to like having 570 00:37:18,719 --> 00:37:21,960 Speaker 3: to file taxes is like practice with her instead of 571 00:37:22,080 --> 00:37:24,800 Speaker 3: like somebody I might have ass love. 572 00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:34,160 Speaker 1: Jewels. If you get you will always be getting married 573 00:37:34,200 --> 00:37:39,600 Speaker 1: to somebody who, hopefully you believe you love. This is 574 00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:41,600 Speaker 1: this is. This is I'm gonna I'm gonna just tell you, 575 00:37:41,640 --> 00:37:44,399 Speaker 1: schadw this is. This is no different from you getting married, 576 00:37:44,440 --> 00:37:47,400 Speaker 1: how however you view it in your head. This is 577 00:37:47,480 --> 00:37:50,040 Speaker 1: no different from you just getting it. And you said 578 00:37:50,040 --> 00:37:52,520 Speaker 1: it yourself, you said, we're actually doing it. This is 579 00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:56,880 Speaker 1: There's there's no practicing here. This is you actually getting 580 00:37:56,960 --> 00:38:03,920 Speaker 1: married to a person who emotions, thoughts, feelings, and actions 581 00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:10,360 Speaker 1: you do not have any control over. That's what getting 582 00:38:10,360 --> 00:38:14,000 Speaker 1: married is. So like again, I'm not going to tell 583 00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:17,960 Speaker 1: you what to do with your life. But I mean, 584 00:38:18,080 --> 00:38:26,960 Speaker 1: on this call right now, you've said that there were 585 00:38:27,040 --> 00:38:30,719 Speaker 1: aspects that you did not think through, such as the 586 00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:35,040 Speaker 1: idea that your relationship might not be beautiful and amazing forever, 587 00:38:35,680 --> 00:38:41,000 Speaker 1: and I hope it is. I will say that, well, 588 00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:45,480 Speaker 1: it's not even that. It's just like incorporating financial aspects 589 00:38:45,520 --> 00:38:50,440 Speaker 1: into this changes the dynamics of your relationship that might 590 00:38:50,480 --> 00:38:53,960 Speaker 1: make it less likely for it to be amazing and 591 00:38:54,000 --> 00:38:57,239 Speaker 1: beautiful forever. So I again, I'm not going to tell 592 00:38:57,239 --> 00:39:02,040 Speaker 1: you what to do. But if I've brought up some 593 00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:04,480 Speaker 1: things on this call that you have not yet thought about, 594 00:39:05,520 --> 00:39:08,000 Speaker 1: you should you should think about them. 595 00:39:10,680 --> 00:39:14,279 Speaker 3: I appreciate that advice very much because I did think 596 00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:17,719 Speaker 3: I thought everything through, like we were planning on getting 597 00:39:17,800 --> 00:39:22,200 Speaker 3: an account together to put in money specifically for a divorce. 598 00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:27,600 Speaker 3: But that whole idea of maybe our relationship not prospering 599 00:39:28,000 --> 00:39:34,000 Speaker 3: like it has been does give me a thought on it. 600 00:39:35,600 --> 00:39:39,399 Speaker 1: Get it again? Who say that again? 601 00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:43,680 Speaker 3: I don't think I'm going to change my mind. I 602 00:39:43,760 --> 00:39:46,480 Speaker 3: do think I will talk to the person more about it, though. 603 00:39:47,920 --> 00:39:49,120 Speaker 1: Have you thought about getting a pre nup? 604 00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:54,200 Speaker 3: Yes, we talked about our pre nup. 605 00:39:57,600 --> 00:40:00,080 Speaker 1: And what were the conclusions of that talk. 606 00:40:02,760 --> 00:40:06,320 Speaker 3: Just more so of us like talking about if we 607 00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:08,960 Speaker 3: want one or not, and then we decided we do. 608 00:40:09,400 --> 00:40:13,320 Speaker 3: We haven't gotten to the like lawyer paperwork part of 609 00:40:13,440 --> 00:40:16,480 Speaker 3: the prenup, but we were going to do that before 610 00:40:16,719 --> 00:40:17,600 Speaker 3: the ceremony. 611 00:40:18,560 --> 00:40:24,400 Speaker 1: Okay, if I I just would encourage you to not 612 00:40:24,560 --> 00:40:27,800 Speaker 1: think about this as a practice, because you're it's not 613 00:40:28,320 --> 00:40:33,279 Speaker 1: you're you're doing it. A practice would not involve you 614 00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:36,040 Speaker 1: going down to the courthouse and actually getting married. 615 00:40:44,239 --> 00:40:47,000 Speaker 3: Fair enough, so I'm actually getting married to my friend. 616 00:40:47,400 --> 00:40:49,400 Speaker 3: To you actually try marriage. 617 00:40:50,040 --> 00:40:54,120 Speaker 1: You are and you know what, You're an adult with 618 00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:57,680 Speaker 1: agency over your own life, and you you're free to 619 00:40:57,719 --> 00:41:01,080 Speaker 1: do whatever you want with that agency. But I guess 620 00:41:01,200 --> 00:41:02,520 Speaker 1: if I'm on the phone with you right now and 621 00:41:02,600 --> 00:41:05,200 Speaker 1: we're talking about it, I would just encourage you to 622 00:41:06,719 --> 00:41:11,319 Speaker 1: think about what you're doing as as as thoroughly as 623 00:41:11,360 --> 00:41:12,880 Speaker 1: you possibly can before you do it. 624 00:41:18,680 --> 00:41:21,520 Speaker 3: I will put even more thought than I already have 625 00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:25,480 Speaker 3: into this for you and for me and the other person. 626 00:41:26,160 --> 00:41:27,480 Speaker 1: Jules, is there anything else you want to say to 627 00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:28,640 Speaker 1: the people the computer before we go? 628 00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:35,680 Speaker 3: Let those intrusive thoughts within, because I'm getting married because 629 00:41:35,719 --> 00:41:38,040 Speaker 3: of it. Thank you have a great day. 630 00:41:38,160 --> 00:41:43,720 Speaker 1: Geck you as well, good night, good night. I don't know, dude, 631 00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:47,040 Speaker 1: I a fuck, I've said fucked fuck. I've said this 632 00:41:47,239 --> 00:41:49,279 Speaker 1: so many times on this podcast that and I hate 633 00:41:49,320 --> 00:41:55,880 Speaker 1: repeating myself. But I'm not going to tell her what 634 00:41:56,040 --> 00:41:59,520 Speaker 1: to do. But I hate the idea of getting married 635 00:42:00,120 --> 00:42:05,160 Speaker 1: at nineteen years old. There are so many infinite other 636 00:42:05,400 --> 00:42:09,200 Speaker 1: things that you could be doing to positively and productively 637 00:42:09,960 --> 00:42:13,080 Speaker 1: affect your life. But then again, I don't know. Man, 638 00:42:13,160 --> 00:42:16,480 Speaker 1: We're all wired differently, and different things bring us happiness. 639 00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:18,920 Speaker 1: So I'm not going to tell people what is going 640 00:42:18,960 --> 00:42:21,120 Speaker 1: to make them happy in their life. But I do 641 00:42:21,480 --> 00:42:27,919 Speaker 1: hope at Jules thinks about this, and I hopefully gets 642 00:42:27,920 --> 00:42:31,320 Speaker 1: out of the idea that you know, she's in a practice, 643 00:42:32,239 --> 00:42:36,480 Speaker 1: because nothing about what she described seemed to be a 644 00:42:36,560 --> 00:42:41,600 Speaker 1: practice to me. And I mean, look, I'm thinking of 645 00:42:41,719 --> 00:42:44,759 Speaker 1: I'm really thinking about it now. All of life is 646 00:42:44,840 --> 00:42:47,960 Speaker 1: a practice, pretty much, right. I don't know if that 647 00:42:48,120 --> 00:42:49,960 Speaker 1: makes sense, but I'm thinking about the ways in which 648 00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:52,680 Speaker 1: it does. Because let's say that she does get married 649 00:42:54,520 --> 00:43:00,279 Speaker 1: and her finances become entangled with this other part, and 650 00:43:00,960 --> 00:43:04,600 Speaker 1: she loses a bunch of money and gets totally fucked. 651 00:43:06,880 --> 00:43:11,520 Speaker 1: I mean whatever, she'll be like twenty one, She'll be 652 00:43:11,840 --> 00:43:15,440 Speaker 1: have her youth and hopefully her arms and legs. She'll 653 00:43:15,520 --> 00:43:17,799 Speaker 1: be fine. I think she'll be fine, is what I'm 654 00:43:17,840 --> 00:43:24,239 Speaker 1: trying to say. But I hope she thinks about it. Hello. Hello, 655 00:43:24,920 --> 00:43:27,759 Speaker 1: it says here you're twenty two years old from Colorado, 656 00:43:27,840 --> 00:43:33,160 Speaker 1: and it says that you were born without a butthole. Yeah. 657 00:43:33,760 --> 00:43:38,200 Speaker 4: So, yeah, I was born with a lot of medical problems, 658 00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:41,640 Speaker 4: one of which was a bubble. I had a lot 659 00:43:41,680 --> 00:43:45,680 Speaker 4: of cemmety issues, so like, for instance, my lungs and 660 00:43:45,719 --> 00:43:49,120 Speaker 4: I switched, my heart is on the opposite side of 661 00:43:49,160 --> 00:43:52,839 Speaker 4: the body, and I have to cheese vertebrae. But also 662 00:43:52,920 --> 00:43:58,880 Speaker 4: another feature is having a no bubble. Originally, it started 663 00:43:58,920 --> 00:44:02,760 Speaker 4: out as my orinary track in my large intestines were switched. 664 00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:05,719 Speaker 4: So I was making little deer poops out of my 665 00:44:06,360 --> 00:44:08,800 Speaker 4: ppe when I was about two days old. So I 666 00:44:08,840 --> 00:44:12,520 Speaker 4: had emergency surgery to correct that, and so I had 667 00:44:12,840 --> 00:44:16,440 Speaker 4: a butthole, but it just wasn't formed yet. So I 668 00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:19,480 Speaker 4: had all that tissue structures and all the good stuff 669 00:44:19,560 --> 00:44:24,279 Speaker 4: for the doctors to use, and yeah, just surgically made 670 00:44:24,280 --> 00:44:26,919 Speaker 4: a butt butthole. But I had a butt crack. 671 00:44:28,440 --> 00:44:31,640 Speaker 1: Okay, so you had the beginnings of a butthole, but 672 00:44:31,880 --> 00:44:33,120 Speaker 1: not a completed butthole. 673 00:44:34,880 --> 00:44:37,800 Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly a pre butthole. 674 00:44:38,640 --> 00:44:41,560 Speaker 1: And so currently this and so you're talking about when 675 00:44:41,600 --> 00:44:43,480 Speaker 1: you were a baby, currently as a twenty two year old, 676 00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:46,000 Speaker 1: what is the status of your butthole. 677 00:44:47,880 --> 00:44:54,080 Speaker 4: That perfectly functional? Normal? It's actually funny. I actually kind 678 00:44:54,120 --> 00:44:56,480 Speaker 4: of had an access a little shot in my parents 679 00:44:56,480 --> 00:44:59,800 Speaker 4: a little bit the other day, just climbing. But I 680 00:45:00,360 --> 00:45:04,800 Speaker 4: was out all day outside climbing, rock climbing, and you know, 681 00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:07,840 Speaker 4: in the harness of just basically forced in that position, 682 00:45:08,520 --> 00:45:11,799 Speaker 4: a little came out, but you know, it just kind 683 00:45:11,840 --> 00:45:14,359 Speaker 4: of sucked it up and dealt with it, and then 684 00:45:14,560 --> 00:45:19,480 Speaker 4: when I got home just kind of cleaned up. But yeah, no, 685 00:45:19,600 --> 00:45:21,840 Speaker 4: it's pretty normal now. I had a lot of issues 686 00:45:21,880 --> 00:45:25,600 Speaker 4: growing up with it, but now it's yeah, shit happens, 687 00:45:25,680 --> 00:45:31,279 Speaker 4: and I'm pretty normal as any other normal butthole user is. 688 00:45:34,280 --> 00:45:38,319 Speaker 1: So how long did it take around? What age did 689 00:45:38,400 --> 00:45:42,120 Speaker 1: your butthole arrive at some sense of normality? 690 00:45:43,920 --> 00:45:48,080 Speaker 4: Oh, good question. I would say I would say like 691 00:45:48,480 --> 00:45:51,800 Speaker 4: high school, kind of late high school, late high school. 692 00:45:52,000 --> 00:45:52,920 Speaker 4: That's when I kind of. 693 00:45:55,120 --> 00:45:58,040 Speaker 1: So, so you did experience many years. I mean, I 694 00:45:58,160 --> 00:46:01,520 Speaker 1: think you know, if you where a toddler or a baby, 695 00:46:03,320 --> 00:46:06,440 Speaker 1: you wouldn't have had enough consciousness to even remember what 696 00:46:06,600 --> 00:46:10,200 Speaker 1: life was like with without a normal butthole. But you 697 00:46:10,600 --> 00:46:14,640 Speaker 1: have had in your youth conscious years where you did 698 00:46:14,719 --> 00:46:15,720 Speaker 1: not have a butthole. 699 00:46:17,880 --> 00:46:20,440 Speaker 4: Well, I had it, but I just didn't have like 700 00:46:20,760 --> 00:46:23,960 Speaker 4: normal function. So I just it wasn't as strong as 701 00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:27,000 Speaker 4: your butthole per se. And so when you could like 702 00:46:27,480 --> 00:46:32,080 Speaker 4: hold in your poop, I couldn't as well. And so 703 00:46:32,239 --> 00:46:34,840 Speaker 4: it took a lot of like just growing up and 704 00:46:35,120 --> 00:46:39,160 Speaker 4: just strength training specifically like keegels, in order to like 705 00:46:39,400 --> 00:46:43,560 Speaker 4: strengthen that and enable me to like hold my poop 706 00:46:43,600 --> 00:46:43,960 Speaker 4: per se. 707 00:46:45,080 --> 00:46:48,080 Speaker 1: So, Michael, you're thirteen years old, you have an abnormal butthole. 708 00:46:49,960 --> 00:46:54,160 Speaker 1: How does this affect your day to day life? 709 00:46:57,120 --> 00:47:00,239 Speaker 4: I would say not a lot. Like I was still 710 00:47:00,239 --> 00:47:04,719 Speaker 4: a three sport athlete. I played football, I wrestled, and 711 00:47:04,880 --> 00:47:08,880 Speaker 4: I ran track and whatnot. But I'd always like come prepared. 712 00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:09,880 Speaker 4: I'd come like with a. 713 00:47:11,400 --> 00:47:11,960 Speaker 2: Bag and. 714 00:47:13,840 --> 00:47:16,720 Speaker 4: Underwear and whatnot, just in case if anything did happen, 715 00:47:16,960 --> 00:47:21,680 Speaker 4: and I would be prepared for it. But like inevitably, 716 00:47:21,760 --> 00:47:23,560 Speaker 4: you just have to like prepare for it and then 717 00:47:24,040 --> 00:47:26,640 Speaker 4: kind of like not be ashamed of yourself and just 718 00:47:26,800 --> 00:47:29,279 Speaker 4: accept that, like, you know, this is who I am, 719 00:47:29,440 --> 00:47:33,239 Speaker 4: and you know I'm not there yet, but I will 720 00:47:33,360 --> 00:47:35,160 Speaker 4: be and this is just part of process. 721 00:47:36,040 --> 00:47:40,080 Speaker 1: Interesting, So has this process of accepting yourself and your 722 00:47:40,160 --> 00:47:48,040 Speaker 1: physical abnormalities been helpful to you just as a general 723 00:47:48,719 --> 00:47:51,239 Speaker 1: practice of being okay with who you are? 724 00:47:53,080 --> 00:47:53,279 Speaker 2: Yeah? 725 00:47:53,320 --> 00:47:57,279 Speaker 4: Absolutely. Like another big thing about my personality per se 726 00:47:57,440 --> 00:48:02,200 Speaker 4: is I'm autistic. I or was diagnosed with Aspergers, even 727 00:48:02,239 --> 00:48:05,680 Speaker 4: though it's not formally anymore. But that was another thing. 728 00:48:05,760 --> 00:48:09,600 Speaker 4: I was just really socially awkward as younger, as a kid, 729 00:48:09,680 --> 00:48:12,839 Speaker 4: and just really was hard accepting like who I am, 730 00:48:13,080 --> 00:48:15,120 Speaker 4: and like I have a huge scar across my stomach. 731 00:48:15,160 --> 00:48:18,080 Speaker 4: So I was really ashamed of like being shirtless in 732 00:48:18,160 --> 00:48:20,920 Speaker 4: front of a large crowd because I just didn't want 733 00:48:20,960 --> 00:48:24,680 Speaker 4: people to ask questions about my scars and whatnot. But 734 00:48:25,160 --> 00:48:28,160 Speaker 4: now I love to work out and whatnot, and I 735 00:48:28,640 --> 00:48:31,360 Speaker 4: you know, more than comfortable with like climbing with my 736 00:48:31,440 --> 00:48:33,279 Speaker 4: shirt off and just going out in public without my 737 00:48:33,360 --> 00:48:36,680 Speaker 4: shirt on, you know, because I developed muscles. But it's 738 00:48:36,680 --> 00:48:39,560 Speaker 4: also it's just it doesn't matter because it doesn't define me, 739 00:48:40,200 --> 00:48:44,840 Speaker 4: I define those characters like like for autism, growing up, 740 00:48:44,920 --> 00:48:47,360 Speaker 4: my parents treated me normally like they would with my 741 00:48:47,440 --> 00:48:49,840 Speaker 4: other siblings, and that was probably the best thing that 742 00:48:49,840 --> 00:48:52,040 Speaker 4: could have happened to me. It's just like, you know, 743 00:48:52,320 --> 00:48:54,920 Speaker 4: not being treated special because of my conditions. 744 00:48:55,920 --> 00:49:01,000 Speaker 1: Have you had times maybe by teachers or by other 745 00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:04,480 Speaker 1: students growing up where you were treated differently because you 746 00:49:04,560 --> 00:49:05,040 Speaker 1: had autism? 747 00:49:09,920 --> 00:49:13,680 Speaker 4: I would say I was pretty pretty reluctant actually, just 748 00:49:13,719 --> 00:49:17,440 Speaker 4: growing up a good family environment and just good friends 749 00:49:17,480 --> 00:49:20,840 Speaker 4: around me. I would say that, like I was just 750 00:49:21,000 --> 00:49:26,120 Speaker 4: more unaware of like how they were treating me, like 751 00:49:26,280 --> 00:49:30,480 Speaker 4: viewing that as like something negative, some like reflecting and 752 00:49:30,600 --> 00:49:33,120 Speaker 4: like oh wow, they're an asshole. But like maybe before 753 00:49:33,160 --> 00:49:34,920 Speaker 4: I was like holy shit, someone's talking to me or 754 00:49:34,960 --> 00:49:40,640 Speaker 4: something like that. But I try not to view it 755 00:49:40,719 --> 00:49:45,320 Speaker 4: as like something that they're like directly negative towards me. 756 00:49:45,440 --> 00:49:47,680 Speaker 4: It's more of like a misunderstanding on their part. 757 00:49:48,600 --> 00:49:52,839 Speaker 1: Mmm. I mean, so it sounds like, you know, growing 758 00:49:52,920 --> 00:49:56,680 Speaker 1: up you had to deal with a lot of physical 759 00:49:56,760 --> 00:50:00,879 Speaker 1: and mental challenges. To where you are at in your 760 00:50:00,960 --> 00:50:05,560 Speaker 1: life right now, what degree are these things still challenging you, 761 00:50:05,760 --> 00:50:06,719 Speaker 1: if if any at all? 762 00:50:10,200 --> 00:50:14,400 Speaker 4: Yeah, I would say it's it's I'm in college right now, 763 00:50:14,880 --> 00:50:19,200 Speaker 4: I'm on my final setch of that, and I'm still 764 00:50:19,840 --> 00:50:22,640 Speaker 4: kind of discovering myself and still trying to figure out myself. 765 00:50:22,680 --> 00:50:24,800 Speaker 4: I've been living alone for about two years now, and 766 00:50:24,840 --> 00:50:27,640 Speaker 4: I'm still running a lot about myself, and a lot 767 00:50:27,680 --> 00:50:30,279 Speaker 4: of it is, you know, not positive, like you know, 768 00:50:30,440 --> 00:50:34,000 Speaker 4: I'm not as outgoing as I thought I was, or 769 00:50:34,480 --> 00:50:37,759 Speaker 4: probably blah, I want more friends or something like this 770 00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:42,359 Speaker 4: as all just stemming from my own issues. But it's 771 00:50:42,440 --> 00:50:45,400 Speaker 4: like just realizing that it's my problems and it's not 772 00:50:45,600 --> 00:50:46,239 Speaker 4: like other people. 773 00:50:46,280 --> 00:50:48,000 Speaker 1: What can I can I start kind of stopping for something? 774 00:50:48,040 --> 00:50:50,520 Speaker 1: When you when you say when you say in this 775 00:50:50,719 --> 00:50:54,200 Speaker 1: discovery process that you're talking about, when you say you 776 00:50:54,400 --> 00:50:57,520 Speaker 1: discovered you're not as outgoing as you thought you were, 777 00:50:58,040 --> 00:50:59,040 Speaker 1: what does that mean? 778 00:50:59,160 --> 00:50:59,200 Speaker 2: What? 779 00:50:59,440 --> 00:51:01,320 Speaker 1: What did that discovery look like? 780 00:51:04,239 --> 00:51:10,920 Speaker 4: Well, it's a really good question. I would say that 781 00:51:12,080 --> 00:51:16,880 Speaker 4: I mean that by like like in kind of first introductions, 782 00:51:17,000 --> 00:51:20,000 Speaker 4: Like if I would say I'm outgoing with with people 783 00:51:20,080 --> 00:51:22,320 Speaker 4: I'm comfortable with and people that I know, but like 784 00:51:22,840 --> 00:51:26,040 Speaker 4: you know, and being introduced or talking to a job 785 00:51:26,040 --> 00:51:29,560 Speaker 4: at the bar, or just like a random student that 786 00:51:29,680 --> 00:51:31,920 Speaker 4: I haven't met before. It's just like a lot more 787 00:51:32,120 --> 00:51:34,680 Speaker 4: nerve wracking, and I can't really be my true self 788 00:51:34,760 --> 00:51:38,000 Speaker 4: and be as outgoing as I think I am, just 789 00:51:38,080 --> 00:51:41,200 Speaker 4: because I kind of freeze up and and so forth. 790 00:51:43,760 --> 00:51:49,040 Speaker 1: And is this something that you are optimistic about being 791 00:51:49,120 --> 00:51:51,680 Speaker 1: able to kind of overcome in the future. 792 00:51:54,480 --> 00:51:59,800 Speaker 4: H Yeah, yeah, I would say so. I like sitting 793 00:51:59,840 --> 00:52:03,800 Speaker 4: in as I like education because I just like failing 794 00:52:03,960 --> 00:52:07,920 Speaker 4: and I like seeing progress because that's the one thing 795 00:52:08,239 --> 00:52:11,440 Speaker 4: I'm starting to realize is like failure is good and 796 00:52:11,719 --> 00:52:13,520 Speaker 4: even though it doesn't feel good in the moment, it's 797 00:52:13,520 --> 00:52:17,239 Speaker 4: a really good teaching point and you can become better 798 00:52:17,360 --> 00:52:19,840 Speaker 4: off of it. And so that's like me becoming a 799 00:52:19,920 --> 00:52:23,440 Speaker 4: better out, more outgoing person. It's just me more willing 800 00:52:23,520 --> 00:52:27,239 Speaker 4: to become uncomfortable with those situations that I try to 801 00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:28,399 Speaker 4: exclude myself from. 802 00:52:29,400 --> 00:52:32,920 Speaker 1: It is interesting, It is interesting, and I feel like 803 00:52:33,440 --> 00:52:35,839 Speaker 1: you've had to do that a lot in your life, 804 00:52:35,880 --> 00:52:37,320 Speaker 1: so you're kind of used to the process. 805 00:52:39,040 --> 00:52:39,239 Speaker 2: Yeah. 806 00:52:39,520 --> 00:52:42,680 Speaker 4: No, I've also been like leaking spinal fluid. That was 807 00:52:42,760 --> 00:52:46,600 Speaker 4: one of my seat surgeries caused me to leak spinal 808 00:52:46,680 --> 00:52:49,719 Speaker 4: fluid for eighteen years of my life, and that was 809 00:52:49,840 --> 00:52:52,880 Speaker 4: just me getting used to being uncomfortable and so now 810 00:52:53,000 --> 00:52:56,440 Speaker 4: it's like a lot of times I'm either extremely uncomfortable 811 00:52:56,520 --> 00:53:00,279 Speaker 4: or not uncomfortable, and like when I am comfortable, it's 812 00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:03,320 Speaker 4: it's a weird feeling, you know. It's like it's just 813 00:53:03,480 --> 00:53:05,480 Speaker 4: like I can't say still, I have to be doing 814 00:53:05,560 --> 00:53:08,200 Speaker 4: something consistently, or I have to be putting myself in 815 00:53:08,680 --> 00:53:12,200 Speaker 4: these uncomfortable situations, or else I just like get bored 816 00:53:12,280 --> 00:53:13,080 Speaker 4: and complacent. 817 00:53:14,840 --> 00:53:16,920 Speaker 1: Well this is cool, man, because you know you still 818 00:53:18,160 --> 00:53:21,920 Speaker 1: you know, like everyone have problems and challenges with your life. 819 00:53:21,960 --> 00:53:26,920 Speaker 1: You haven't, you you have not solved the game of existence. 820 00:53:27,719 --> 00:53:31,920 Speaker 1: But it sounds like you're it sounds like you're like 821 00:53:32,280 --> 00:53:37,320 Speaker 1: sitting on a good foundation of dealing with your problems, 822 00:53:37,960 --> 00:53:40,160 Speaker 1: you know, a better one than maybe you had growing 823 00:53:40,280 --> 00:53:43,960 Speaker 1: up as a result of those experiences growing up. Is 824 00:53:44,040 --> 00:53:44,640 Speaker 1: that accurate? 825 00:53:46,120 --> 00:53:46,279 Speaker 2: Yeah? 826 00:53:46,320 --> 00:53:50,640 Speaker 4: Absolutely, Like everybody has adversity, it's just like kind of 827 00:53:51,400 --> 00:53:53,760 Speaker 4: where that is in their life and like what areas 828 00:53:53,880 --> 00:53:57,440 Speaker 4: that adversity is, And you know, kind of your character 829 00:53:57,600 --> 00:53:59,960 Speaker 4: is defined by how you overcome those adversities. 830 00:54:01,160 --> 00:54:02,640 Speaker 1: But did you say at one point that you have 831 00:54:02,800 --> 00:54:06,200 Speaker 1: a poop out of your penis? Yeah? 832 00:54:06,360 --> 00:54:09,200 Speaker 4: No, that's how the doctors found it out is they 833 00:54:09,320 --> 00:54:13,520 Speaker 4: saw like like I don't know if you've ever very 834 00:54:14,000 --> 00:54:18,560 Speaker 4: vivid like graphic explanation, but if you've ever skinned the 835 00:54:18,640 --> 00:54:22,239 Speaker 4: deer and you take out a digestive track, you see 836 00:54:22,280 --> 00:54:27,120 Speaker 4: a bunch of like poop pellets, like in the digestic track, 837 00:54:27,280 --> 00:54:30,960 Speaker 4: and they're like little pellets, and then space. It's like 838 00:54:31,040 --> 00:54:34,000 Speaker 4: a snake eating these pellets for safe and so that's 839 00:54:34,040 --> 00:54:37,440 Speaker 4: what my penis looked like, was like these little pellets 840 00:54:37,760 --> 00:54:41,000 Speaker 4: like space style, and they're like, holy shit, it would 841 00:54:41,000 --> 00:54:41,359 Speaker 4: be good. 842 00:54:42,080 --> 00:54:44,000 Speaker 1: I feel like the fact that you had to poop 843 00:54:44,040 --> 00:54:46,000 Speaker 1: out of your penis at a young age, it's set 844 00:54:46,040 --> 00:54:51,120 Speaker 1: you because that is like you've already done the hardest thing, 845 00:54:52,239 --> 00:54:55,960 Speaker 1: so everything gets a little bit easier from there. So 846 00:54:56,120 --> 00:54:58,200 Speaker 1: it's kind of you got said nicely with that. 847 00:55:00,000 --> 00:55:02,920 Speaker 4: Absolutely it sets the pace and gives you some perspective. 848 00:55:04,520 --> 00:55:05,719 Speaker 1: Michael, is there anyth else you want to say to 849 00:55:05,760 --> 00:55:06,920 Speaker 1: the people the computer before we go? 850 00:55:09,840 --> 00:55:12,400 Speaker 4: I would just say, you know whatever, you're going to 851 00:55:12,680 --> 00:55:17,239 Speaker 4: keep your head up and there's always silver lining and 852 00:55:17,760 --> 00:55:19,680 Speaker 4: you always pop up through. It's enough time. 853 00:55:21,000 --> 00:55:24,200 Speaker 1: Thank you for calling, Michael, Yeah, thank you. 854 00:55:24,360 --> 00:55:26,360 Speaker 4: Ile I a good rest of your day, man. 855 00:55:28,360 --> 00:55:32,160 Speaker 1: I like that guy because he had a very interesting 856 00:55:32,280 --> 00:55:37,640 Speaker 1: perspective on how he's living his life. No, he started 857 00:55:37,719 --> 00:55:43,000 Speaker 1: off at like level ten difficulty and then everything just 858 00:55:43,040 --> 00:55:47,920 Speaker 1: got a little bit easier from there. I'm kind of inspiring. 859 00:55:47,960 --> 00:55:50,360 Speaker 1: I kind of inspired to attempt to poop out of 860 00:55:50,440 --> 00:55:55,160 Speaker 1: my own penis so that every challenge that I go 861 00:55:55,360 --> 00:55:59,920 Speaker 1: through in life seems comparatively easier. But I don't know 862 00:56:00,000 --> 00:56:03,279 Speaker 1: how to do that, so I will not there. 863 00:56:03,360 --> 00:56:06,600 Speaker 4: Rep Cant goes on the line taking your phone calls 864 00:56:06,680 --> 00:56:07,279 Speaker 4: every night. 865 00:56:07,600 --> 00:56:10,440 Speaker 2: The repeat Can goes doing his ride's teaching. 866 00:56:10,239 --> 00:56:11,400 Speaker 1: You cloud liver your 867 00:56:11,480 --> 00:56:14,280 Speaker 2: Life, but he's not really an expert.