1
00:00:00,360 --> 00:00:03,680
Speaker 1: Do you think I'm acting free and feeling free? That's

2
00:00:03,680 --> 00:00:08,080
Speaker 1: what Kanye asked Van, or actually the entire newsroom of TMZ.

3
00:00:08,840 --> 00:00:13,080
Speaker 1: Van's response, most notably, I actually don't think you're thinking anything.

4
00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:15,720
Speaker 1: I think what you're doing right now is actually the

5
00:00:15,880 --> 00:00:20,880
Speaker 1: absence of thought. He said, real world, real life consequences

6
00:00:20,920 --> 00:00:25,400
Speaker 1: behind everything that you just said. What he said was

7
00:00:25,440 --> 00:00:28,880
Speaker 1: that slavery was a choice. You all remember when Kanye

8
00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:31,840
Speaker 1: said slavery was a choice. Well, from that moment on

9
00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:38,040
Speaker 1: My Friend guest on Today's Naked podcast, Van Lathan has

10
00:00:38,120 --> 00:00:40,560
Speaker 1: been using his words to speak for those who can't

11
00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:45,159
Speaker 1: necessarily speak for themselves, but more importantly give us a

12
00:00:45,200 --> 00:00:49,920
Speaker 1: different change, a different perspective, a different breath of fresh air,

13
00:00:49,960 --> 00:00:52,000
Speaker 1: if you will, in a world of people who think

14
00:00:52,040 --> 00:00:56,280
Speaker 1: they have something to say. On the podcast, Van Leathan

15
00:00:57,080 --> 00:00:58,400
Speaker 1: literally is naked.

16
00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:14,720
Speaker 2: Every champion and Kerry Champions to be a champion, out

17
00:01:14,720 --> 00:01:18,039
Speaker 2: a Champion, and Kerry Champion, and Kerry Chappie outa Champion,

18
00:01:18,120 --> 00:01:19,760
Speaker 2: and Kerry Champion and Kerry.

19
00:01:19,600 --> 00:01:22,759
Speaker 3: Champion greatest his sports and entertainment knneked.

20
00:01:22,319 --> 00:01:25,920
Speaker 2: We're in the world were vulnerable considered, we come and

21
00:01:25,959 --> 00:01:29,160
Speaker 2: remove the veil from entertainment's elite. It's the difference between

22
00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:31,679
Speaker 2: what it's reeling with the public seeds. So here's your

23
00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:33,560
Speaker 2: favorite celebrities behind the scenes.

24
00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:35,560
Speaker 3: It's refreshing up there in the whole.

25
00:01:35,319 --> 00:01:38,480
Speaker 2: Story, specific life altering events to shake the person that

26
00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:38,800
Speaker 2: you hear.

27
00:01:38,920 --> 00:01:41,760
Speaker 3: We gotta champion and carry champion. They girl, you did it.

28
00:01:41,760 --> 00:01:44,120
Speaker 3: It's the greatest and sports in the entertainment. Connect it

29
00:01:44,160 --> 00:01:46,440
Speaker 3: with every champion and carry champions.

30
00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:49,000
Speaker 2: To be a champion out of champion and carry champion

31
00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:51,480
Speaker 2: the girl you didn't got a champion and Kerry.

32
00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:54,480
Speaker 3: Champion and carry champion. Great is his sports and entertainment

33
00:01:54,520 --> 00:01:55,280
Speaker 3: Get Naked Wear.

34
00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:59,040
Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, welcome back to another edition of Naked So

35
00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:02,680
Speaker 1: here we go. We have lots to discuss. I went

36
00:02:02,760 --> 00:02:04,760
Speaker 1: on a vacation. I'm gonna take two minutes and just

37
00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:06,240
Speaker 1: tell you all what happened before we get to van.

38
00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:10,560
Speaker 1: I went on a vacation, and you know I could complain,

39
00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:13,040
Speaker 1: so I'm complain for five minutes. But I learned a

40
00:02:13,040 --> 00:02:16,440
Speaker 1: lot about myself. I decided to go to France. That's

41
00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:18,079
Speaker 1: what I try to do every year when I can,

42
00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:19,919
Speaker 1: I save up, I make it the best trip ever.

43
00:02:20,280 --> 00:02:24,080
Speaker 1: I land in France. There is no luggage. My luggage

44
00:02:24,120 --> 00:02:26,400
Speaker 1: somehow got lost in Amsterdam, and who knows what I'm

45
00:02:26,400 --> 00:02:28,640
Speaker 1: gonna get it. They've located it. But if I can

46
00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:30,880
Speaker 1: find it and get it to me before I leave France,

47
00:02:31,320 --> 00:02:35,560
Speaker 1: question mark. I'm here for almost ten days. No clothes,

48
00:02:35,639 --> 00:02:39,000
Speaker 1: no toothbrush, no no face washed, no underwear, no brawl,

49
00:02:39,080 --> 00:02:44,840
Speaker 1: no nothing in France. So I want to feel a way.

50
00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:48,640
Speaker 1: But I'm like effet, settle in. Maybe it'll come, maybe

51
00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:50,880
Speaker 1: it won't. I gotta go shopping, give me some basics,

52
00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:53,800
Speaker 1: and I'm about to become a full minimalist. Of course,

53
00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:56,360
Speaker 1: you know, as Americans traveled with these big ass bags.

54
00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:59,360
Speaker 1: I had a huge ass bag, like the size of children,

55
00:02:59,600 --> 00:03:02,079
Speaker 1: Like I could put two toddlers in this huge luggage

56
00:03:02,080 --> 00:03:04,200
Speaker 1: that I had. So I decided to buy one of

57
00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:06,919
Speaker 1: those European carry ons where you know you can put

58
00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:10,040
Speaker 1: like a shoe in a sock. And I was like, cool,

59
00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:12,880
Speaker 1: I'm using this the whole time I move around Europe.

60
00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:16,360
Speaker 1: I'll buy me some essentials and that's it. And I

61
00:03:16,400 --> 00:03:18,519
Speaker 1: wanted to see if I could do it. And y'all

62
00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:23,480
Speaker 1: guess what, Yes, I did it. And I was like, yo,

63
00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:27,200
Speaker 1: imagine what two things. Two things biggest takeaways for me.

64
00:03:28,160 --> 00:03:31,720
Speaker 1: Your attitude changes everything in your life. My homegirl who

65
00:03:31,760 --> 00:03:33,720
Speaker 1: was with me, I love her. She's hella negative though,

66
00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:36,680
Speaker 1: and she was like, Oh, that sucks, it's awful, it's awful.

67
00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:38,760
Speaker 1: Some other people we were with were like kind of

68
00:03:38,800 --> 00:03:42,000
Speaker 1: complaining and belly aching for me, and I said, you, guys,

69
00:03:42,120 --> 00:03:43,800
Speaker 1: I don't want to hear it. I said, I'm trying

70
00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:45,760
Speaker 1: to stay positive. And if you all remind me how

71
00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:48,440
Speaker 1: pissed you would be if that happened to you, It's

72
00:03:48,480 --> 00:03:50,520
Speaker 1: not gonna make me feel better. I'm gonna tell you

73
00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:52,560
Speaker 1: one thing about me, the older I get, I hate

74
00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:55,240
Speaker 1: negative people. I hate negative energy. I do not want

75
00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:57,200
Speaker 1: to be around it. I nip that in the bud

76
00:03:57,240 --> 00:04:00,520
Speaker 1: right away, because no one has the time. My pet

77
00:04:00,560 --> 00:04:04,000
Speaker 1: peeve is negative energy. If you want to piss me off,

78
00:04:04,480 --> 00:04:07,160
Speaker 1: be stank around me for no damn reason. Excuse my French.

79
00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:08,800
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure they're gonna cuss some of this out,

80
00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:13,960
Speaker 1: cuss and cut. Meanwhile, the day before I get ready

81
00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:17,320
Speaker 1: to leave, they call me and say, we found your luggage.

82
00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:21,800
Speaker 1: My luggage has arrived at one of my little boutique

83
00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:24,320
Speaker 1: Parisian hotels that I stay at with my bougie self,

84
00:04:24,920 --> 00:04:27,200
Speaker 1: and my luggage was waiting for me when I got

85
00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:29,560
Speaker 1: there on Friday, just in time for me to come

86
00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:36,040
Speaker 1: home on Saturday. Coco was like, praise, that's Coco, barking, guys,

87
00:04:36,120 --> 00:04:39,240
Speaker 1: she's here. As I record that's my dog, She's like, good,

88
00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:39,800
Speaker 1: thank you.

89
00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:40,360
Speaker 4: Yeah.

90
00:04:40,360 --> 00:04:43,599
Speaker 1: So my luggage was here here there Europe. I don't

91
00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:45,880
Speaker 1: know where I am. I'm jet lagged right now, forgive me.

92
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:49,440
Speaker 1: But the lesson is it's really how you look at life.

93
00:04:49,440 --> 00:04:52,159
Speaker 1: And with that, I welcome in our next guest, bad Leathan.

94
00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:55,400
Speaker 1: You all remember him, I'm sure, most notably from TMZ.

95
00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:57,720
Speaker 1: He was a black guy on TMZ who always had

96
00:04:57,760 --> 00:05:00,000
Speaker 1: great things to say different perspectives, but he made him

97
00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:02,600
Speaker 1: self known earlier as I talked about in the pre

98
00:05:02,760 --> 00:05:06,400
Speaker 1: role when he went at Kanye. Kanye was saying slavery

99
00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:08,960
Speaker 1: was a choice. He was having a Kanye moment, which

100
00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:13,359
Speaker 1: he does often, and he challenged those in the newsroom

101
00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:15,200
Speaker 1: of TMZ. If y'all don't think I'm a free thinker,

102
00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:17,760
Speaker 1: tell me da da da da, and then like I

103
00:05:17,880 --> 00:05:20,440
Speaker 1: just read, no, I think what you're doing is actually

104
00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:23,200
Speaker 1: the absence of thought. You're not a free thinker. You're

105
00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:25,800
Speaker 1: not thinking by saying slavery was a choice. There are

106
00:05:25,880 --> 00:05:29,240
Speaker 1: consequences to what you're saying. And he let him have it.

107
00:05:29,279 --> 00:05:31,840
Speaker 1: I'm going to estimate a nice minute. But he didn't

108
00:05:31,839 --> 00:05:33,640
Speaker 1: go off on him. He just was like, come on, man,

109
00:05:33,680 --> 00:05:37,040
Speaker 1: be better, think better, think differently. There are people, these

110
00:05:37,040 --> 00:05:39,400
Speaker 1: are these are things that you're talking about that really

111
00:05:40,279 --> 00:05:44,520
Speaker 1: have historical implications, and you're just talking freely. You're not

112
00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:49,520
Speaker 1: thinking freely. I'm paraphrasing. But since then, I've watched his

113
00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:53,520
Speaker 1: career grow in different ways. Right, he was no longer

114
00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:56,040
Speaker 1: at TMZ. I think you know they parted ways. That's

115
00:05:56,360 --> 00:05:58,640
Speaker 1: an official way that I'm going to use it. And

116
00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:02,400
Speaker 1: he got his own podcast and he has this great podcast.

117
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:07,119
Speaker 1: But before that he had been working quietly and behind

118
00:06:07,160 --> 00:06:09,800
Speaker 1: the scenes on other projects, plenty of projects that I'm

119
00:06:09,839 --> 00:06:12,760
Speaker 1: sure many of us didn't know about. But he won

120
00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:17,479
Speaker 1: an OSCA Academy. Would when a Van Laythan is on

121
00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:22,040
Speaker 1: Naked today, I mean that to me is amazing. A

122
00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:24,880
Speaker 1: kid from Bratton Rouge, Louisiana who had dreams, all of

123
00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:27,200
Speaker 1: these dreams that many of you have heard about. You

124
00:06:27,279 --> 00:06:29,200
Speaker 1: move to a city, you want to see things come through,

125
00:06:29,279 --> 00:06:31,799
Speaker 1: You want to do different things, and he was able

126
00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:34,359
Speaker 1: to do it. Two Distant Strangers was amazing. It was

127
00:06:34,360 --> 00:06:38,279
Speaker 1: a short at one an Oscar. It had Joey Badass

128
00:06:38,279 --> 00:06:40,480
Speaker 1: in it. It was amazing. It really was well done,

129
00:06:40,520 --> 00:06:42,120
Speaker 1: and I was happy to see that Van was a

130
00:06:42,120 --> 00:06:45,360
Speaker 1: producer on it. And he gets into it on the podcast,

131
00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:48,120
Speaker 1: we'll talk about it, and he won an Academy award.

132
00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:51,680
Speaker 1: That is something that the average person cannot say. We

133
00:06:51,720 --> 00:06:55,160
Speaker 1: started off the podcast by talking about his book. He

134
00:06:55,200 --> 00:06:57,800
Speaker 1: wrote a book, and I kind of said, just in passing,

135
00:06:57,800 --> 00:07:00,480
Speaker 1: everybody's writing a book, but this book was different, that

136
00:07:00,680 --> 00:07:06,800
Speaker 1: crazy entire Van Lathan is really talking about transformation and

137
00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:11,520
Speaker 1: being caught up in something or a way of life

138
00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:15,520
Speaker 1: that you're not necessarily familiar with as toxic or unhealthy,

139
00:07:16,840 --> 00:07:18,560
Speaker 1: being caught up in a way of life that you're

140
00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:22,200
Speaker 1: not so familiar with that is considered toxic or unhealthy.

141
00:07:22,640 --> 00:07:24,640
Speaker 1: And we get into a lot of different things because

142
00:07:24,680 --> 00:07:26,960
Speaker 1: we just don't talk about the books. That's what Van does.

143
00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:32,040
Speaker 1: But sit back, relaxed, enjoy it. It's pretty juicy.

144
00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:35,360
Speaker 3: And the chatpion and carried chet be and in card.

145
00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:40,640
Speaker 1: So I wanted to ask you, moving here from the South,

146
00:07:41,120 --> 00:07:43,120
Speaker 1: what did you want to do? What was your what

147
00:07:43,200 --> 00:07:45,440
Speaker 1: was your dream coming to La h.

148
00:07:45,640 --> 00:07:48,720
Speaker 4: My dream was to write and produce stuff, to be

149
00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:53,840
Speaker 4: a part of my dream was to write, produce television

150
00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:56,360
Speaker 4: and film, to be in the industry, to be in

151
00:07:56,560 --> 00:08:00,160
Speaker 4: la and to be viable here. And so you know,

152
00:08:00,200 --> 00:08:03,640
Speaker 4: I came out here like pretty wide eyed, but also

153
00:08:03,760 --> 00:08:06,840
Speaker 4: at a time in my life where I had sort

154
00:08:06,840 --> 00:08:10,160
Speaker 4: of you know, if you're from a place and you've

155
00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:12,840
Speaker 4: scouted all the angles, you've looked at all the corners,

156
00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:16,000
Speaker 4: and you're like, I need something more, and I lay

157
00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:16,840
Speaker 4: provided you with that.

158
00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:21,840
Speaker 1: So yeah, okay, everyone comes here with a dream, and

159
00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:24,680
Speaker 1: the fact that that they're able to do it is different.

160
00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:26,760
Speaker 1: You've been able to do it in a major way.

161
00:08:27,280 --> 00:08:30,480
Speaker 1: Oscar Winner, if you will, My old ass dog is

162
00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:33,360
Speaker 1: running ound here like me like, yeah, Oscar Winner, if

163
00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:35,160
Speaker 1: you will? You know what I mean, Like, let's just

164
00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:37,640
Speaker 1: get our let's get our head. I'm sorry. Academy Award

165
00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:44,200
Speaker 1: winning journalist thought provoker Van Lathan on the podcast I'm sorry,

166
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:47,240
Speaker 1: I get together. If I'm gonna give you a title,

167
00:08:47,760 --> 00:08:54,040
Speaker 1: disrespectful and in every possible way, When did you get

168
00:08:54,080 --> 00:08:57,120
Speaker 1: the job. If you don't mind, well, let's go let's

169
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:59,280
Speaker 1: go back. Do you mind if we talk about who

170
00:08:59,320 --> 00:09:03,360
Speaker 1: you are first before we get into Okay.

171
00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:08,240
Speaker 4: We can Hey, are you here for the ride? Literally

172
00:09:09,080 --> 00:09:12,360
Speaker 4: I'm naked right look at this.

173
00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:18,200
Speaker 1: I like what I'm saying. And so everyone knows that

174
00:09:20,920 --> 00:09:22,959
Speaker 1: you come to LA with this big dream and you've

175
00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:26,400
Speaker 1: been able to accomplish it all. And you are on

176
00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:29,559
Speaker 1: a bit of a media tour with your book. And

177
00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:32,680
Speaker 1: everyone has a book, I think like and just the

178
00:09:32,679 --> 00:09:34,680
Speaker 1: way we all have a podcast. Everyone doesn't have a book,

179
00:09:34,720 --> 00:09:37,079
Speaker 1: but everyone has a book or they have something to say.

180
00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:41,240
Speaker 1: You write a book with what in mind when you

181
00:09:41,320 --> 00:09:42,720
Speaker 1: decide it's time for your book.

182
00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:47,920
Speaker 4: I wrote a book, really, I wrote a book with

183
00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:51,439
Speaker 4: odds directly at Bad Rouge. Like everyone laughs, and they

184
00:09:51,480 --> 00:09:56,240
Speaker 4: talk about how much I mentioned Bad Rouge just growing up.

185
00:09:56,880 --> 00:09:59,520
Speaker 4: When when I grew up there, I I just never

186
00:09:59,559 --> 00:10:03,000
Speaker 4: saw my I never saw It's different. Now, you know,

187
00:10:03,040 --> 00:10:05,920
Speaker 4: you got Boosy out there, you got Kevin Gates out there,

188
00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:08,560
Speaker 4: you got in Me, a young boy out there. There's

189
00:10:08,600 --> 00:10:11,839
Speaker 4: a presence there and especially in hip hop and and

190
00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:17,240
Speaker 4: other lots of life. But I never saw myself and

191
00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:22,880
Speaker 4: it was there are so many things there that are

192
00:10:22,920 --> 00:10:25,800
Speaker 4: typical to the Black American experience, but there's so many

193
00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:28,200
Speaker 4: things there that are atypical to it too, because the

194
00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:31,000
Speaker 4: culture is so unique in South Louisiana. So when I

195
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:34,640
Speaker 4: wrote this book, like in writing the book, I wanted

196
00:10:34,679 --> 00:10:42,360
Speaker 4: to explore who my community made me right with love

197
00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:46,040
Speaker 4: and also with sort of a critical eye, looking at

198
00:10:46,040 --> 00:10:48,319
Speaker 4: some of the things that make us healthy and unhealthy.

199
00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:52,839
Speaker 4: And I wanted to talk, using my personal experience to

200
00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:56,920
Speaker 4: all Americans about some of the things that make us

201
00:10:56,920 --> 00:10:58,680
Speaker 4: healthy and some of the things that make us unhealthy.

202
00:10:59,080 --> 00:11:01,559
Speaker 4: But it was very important do it through the perspective

203
00:11:02,360 --> 00:11:04,719
Speaker 4: and the purview of where I grew up because I'm

204
00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:06,000
Speaker 4: just so in love with Louisiana.

205
00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:10,440
Speaker 1: The book and by the way, when you explain it

206
00:11:10,440 --> 00:11:16,080
Speaker 1: in great, great detail, Fat Crazy and Tired explains a lot, right,

207
00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:17,840
Speaker 1: But if you're just looking at it fat crazy entire

208
00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:21,240
Speaker 1: what do you mean? But you go in you I mean,

209
00:11:21,440 --> 00:11:24,600
Speaker 1: not even pain seekingly talk about the food that you ate,

210
00:11:24,679 --> 00:11:27,360
Speaker 1: how you grew up, what size meant to you, how

211
00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:29,880
Speaker 1: you didn't know that you were overweight, like you had

212
00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:32,880
Speaker 1: no idea, and then you and how you then started

213
00:11:32,920 --> 00:11:35,880
Speaker 1: to see other ideas of what this was supposed to

214
00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:38,320
Speaker 1: look like. All of that to me. The way that

215
00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:43,800
Speaker 1: you explain your weight, your journey with weight, your fight

216
00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:49,040
Speaker 1: with staying in shape, is very particulate, and it's very

217
00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:54,040
Speaker 1: not necessarily emotional, but introspective. And you never hear men

218
00:11:54,160 --> 00:11:57,360
Speaker 1: talk about their weight journey like this. Were you at

219
00:11:57,360 --> 00:12:02,200
Speaker 1: all uncomfortable sharing something that I think is just extremely personal?

220
00:12:02,679 --> 00:12:06,920
Speaker 4: No, I think for me, I have a different view

221
00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:12,960
Speaker 4: of manhood. I think then then some men might. I

222
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:18,120
Speaker 4: think my view of manhood is really being as authentic

223
00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:20,160
Speaker 4: as possible. Like I had a father in my life,

224
00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:24,280
Speaker 4: and my father would be like, whenever you're hiding something,

225
00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:27,920
Speaker 4: whenever you're not, oh there were things he hid. Don't

226
00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:32,240
Speaker 4: get me wrong, he hid, he hears some stuff. But

227
00:12:33,080 --> 00:12:35,920
Speaker 4: whenever you're putting off for someone, my dad would be like, okay, well,

228
00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:39,680
Speaker 4: if it's time to cry, cry, And then he'd be like, well,

229
00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:42,640
Speaker 4: who aren't you crying for? Like are you not crying

230
00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:45,600
Speaker 4: for the monk that's around you? And he's like, all right,

231
00:12:45,679 --> 00:12:49,959
Speaker 4: if you, well, then you're there. You're trying to He

232
00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:52,240
Speaker 4: would always tell me the only standard in your life

233
00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:55,200
Speaker 4: is me. But I decide. My father would say, I

234
00:12:55,240 --> 00:12:58,280
Speaker 4: decide when you're a man. I decide when you're grown up.

235
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:00,560
Speaker 4: I decide when you're ready for these things. Understand it

236
00:13:00,559 --> 00:13:03,200
Speaker 4: in your life as me. So, vulnerability is not really

237
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:07,440
Speaker 4: that big of a thing to me because I was

238
00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:09,600
Speaker 4: taught that there are very specific things that you have

239
00:13:09,679 --> 00:13:13,120
Speaker 4: to do to be an asset to your family and

240
00:13:13,120 --> 00:13:16,200
Speaker 4: to your community, and if you do those things, you

241
00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:20,439
Speaker 4: are a man. And so it doesn't matter how you

242
00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:24,800
Speaker 4: present in the world. If you're responsible, dependable, reliable, and

243
00:13:24,840 --> 00:13:27,800
Speaker 4: emotionally emotionally available and protective, you're a man. It doesn't

244
00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:30,040
Speaker 4: matter how much you cried or how much you share

245
00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:32,200
Speaker 4: with people. That's what makes you a man. And I

246
00:13:32,200 --> 00:13:33,360
Speaker 4: got that directly from him.

247
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:36,000
Speaker 1: Where does that come from? And is he writing a

248
00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:40,640
Speaker 1: book the vulnerability of black men is so rare and

249
00:13:40,640 --> 00:13:43,480
Speaker 1: correct me if I'm wrong. Yeah, but it is so rare,

250
00:13:43,600 --> 00:13:47,160
Speaker 1: but not even it's rare. That's why when I'm listening

251
00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:50,200
Speaker 1: to your book, I'm like, he has the words to

252
00:13:50,320 --> 00:13:52,520
Speaker 1: express what he's feeling. And I'm sure therapy has helped

253
00:13:52,520 --> 00:13:55,000
Speaker 1: with that as well. But there's a difference between going

254
00:13:55,040 --> 00:13:58,839
Speaker 1: to therapy accepting it and learning and then actually illustrating

255
00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:01,720
Speaker 1: it in real life for other black men to see.

256
00:14:02,240 --> 00:14:04,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, I mean he's not writing the book because

257
00:14:04,679 --> 00:14:12,280
Speaker 4: he's dead. But I meant like, you know what, right, right,

258
00:14:12,520 --> 00:14:17,359
Speaker 4: so that book's not coming any time. Uh. But but

259
00:14:17,360 --> 00:14:19,480
Speaker 4: but what are you?

260
00:14:19,920 --> 00:14:20,680
Speaker 5: Right from the grain?

261
00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:22,560
Speaker 1: Spiritually range from the grain?

262
00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:25,880
Speaker 4: Right? But no, I think and by the way, I'm

263
00:14:25,920 --> 00:14:28,360
Speaker 4: not saying that all that my relationship with my father was.

264
00:14:28,760 --> 00:14:31,200
Speaker 4: I write about it in the book. He's still in

265
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:34,400
Speaker 4: other ways was very traumatizing to me. He still had

266
00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:37,880
Speaker 4: very old school beliefs on sex, he still had very

267
00:14:37,880 --> 00:14:40,960
Speaker 4: old school beliefs on manhood that didn't job with this.

268
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:45,920
Speaker 4: It's just that he didn't believe in censoring who you

269
00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:48,880
Speaker 4: were for anyone. And so I think vulnerability was a

270
00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:50,880
Speaker 4: part that when I was a kid, I was prone

271
00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:54,480
Speaker 4: to crime. Like, I was very emotional, I was very inquisitive.

272
00:14:54,480 --> 00:14:58,640
Speaker 4: I would take on, I would take on, uh, I

273
00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:00,800
Speaker 4: take on all of these concepts were too big for me.

274
00:15:00,840 --> 00:15:05,440
Speaker 4: I would think about like nuclear war and existentialism. I

275
00:15:05,440 --> 00:15:07,360
Speaker 4: would go through all of this stuff right when I

276
00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:10,400
Speaker 4: was when I was a kid, and at certain times

277
00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:12,200
Speaker 4: my brind would just short circuit and I would just

278
00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:14,640
Speaker 4: freak out, and my dad would just be like, leave

279
00:15:14,680 --> 00:15:18,480
Speaker 4: them alone, like let him like he never once made

280
00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:21,040
Speaker 4: me feel bad for crying and worrying. He would say

281
00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:22,880
Speaker 4: that I needed to do maybe a little bit less

282
00:15:22,920 --> 00:15:25,120
Speaker 4: of it, but he'd be like, leave him alone, let

283
00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,480
Speaker 4: him figure it out. I'd rather give it to us

284
00:15:27,480 --> 00:15:29,680
Speaker 4: here than give it to somebody out in the street.

285
00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:33,840
Speaker 4: So I think that vulnerability for vulnerability for me, I

286
00:15:33,880 --> 00:15:36,960
Speaker 4: don't think it's I think I never looked at it

287
00:15:37,040 --> 00:15:38,880
Speaker 4: as something that I had to be ashamed of. So

288
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:40,640
Speaker 4: I've never been ashamed of it.

289
00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:43,880
Speaker 1: It's crazy, okay, but do you see what I'm talking about?

290
00:15:45,720 --> 00:15:48,920
Speaker 4: No, no, no, you're not crazy, but the thing but yeah, no,

291
00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:52,080
Speaker 4: of course it is. But I think also though, that

292
00:15:52,080 --> 00:15:53,840
Speaker 4: that has to do with people when they feel like

293
00:15:53,880 --> 00:15:57,040
Speaker 4: there's something to protect, like for like for me, I

294
00:15:57,160 --> 00:16:00,720
Speaker 4: never had to worry about whether or not there was somebody.

295
00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:04,440
Speaker 4: I knew that if you with me, there were repercussions

296
00:16:04,440 --> 00:16:06,680
Speaker 4: for that. So if we're somewhere, we're out on the street,

297
00:16:06,680 --> 00:16:09,320
Speaker 4: we're in guard to your lane, back News Louisiana, the

298
00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:11,080
Speaker 4: bottom of the South, all of these hoods that I

299
00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:14,600
Speaker 4: grew up in, right, I know my life is worth something.

300
00:16:15,520 --> 00:16:17,320
Speaker 4: So I don't need to really act tough with you,

301
00:16:17,400 --> 00:16:19,360
Speaker 4: because if you with me, there's a guy with a

302
00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:21,280
Speaker 4: gun and he comes to get you. And you know

303
00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:24,560
Speaker 4: that interesting, right and so and so. Because of that,

304
00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:27,240
Speaker 4: I only fight when I'm mad, So I don't fight

305
00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:29,200
Speaker 4: to prove anything to you. I don't fight to prove

306
00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:31,840
Speaker 4: to you I'm I don't fight to prove him out

307
00:16:31,840 --> 00:16:33,880
Speaker 4: a bitch. I fight when I want to hurt you.

308
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,960
Speaker 4: And in that way, my childhood was actually a little liberating.

309
00:16:38,560 --> 00:16:43,320
Speaker 1: That's fascinating because there are so many people that I know,

310
00:16:43,400 --> 00:16:45,440
Speaker 1: especially growing up in our label, like I know homeboy

311
00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:46,760
Speaker 1: down the road and he can do this, and he

312
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:48,280
Speaker 1: can do that, and I call my I can make

313
00:16:48,280 --> 00:16:51,000
Speaker 1: a phone call and the situation is different, but they

314
00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:54,240
Speaker 1: still have hard time being vulnerable and expressing themselves. Those

315
00:16:54,240 --> 00:16:56,800
Speaker 1: are two separate things. Yes you have safety, Yes you

316
00:16:56,840 --> 00:17:00,560
Speaker 1: have protection, but it was still how do you like

317
00:17:00,720 --> 00:17:03,440
Speaker 1: for your father to let me be emotional? If you will,

318
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:06,359
Speaker 1: whatever that is, right, whatever that means in a negative

319
00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:10,639
Speaker 1: or positive connotation to me, is liberating to me.

320
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:14,879
Speaker 4: That artist liberating, Yeah, but also like it was this

321
00:17:15,040 --> 00:17:18,440
Speaker 4: thing to where I remember I was on the basketball

322
00:17:18,440 --> 00:17:20,119
Speaker 4: court one time, and it was some of the older

323
00:17:20,119 --> 00:17:25,400
Speaker 4: guys in the neighborhood were there, and We're across Guardia

324
00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:27,919
Speaker 4: on the other side, and I'm playing ball and I

325
00:17:27,920 --> 00:17:29,760
Speaker 4: didn't know the kids I was playing ball with. I

326
00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:32,000
Speaker 4: was a big kid, right, and so being a big kid,

327
00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:35,879
Speaker 4: not just being but tall because I played sports, so

328
00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:37,959
Speaker 4: my weight wul fluctuate. But I was tall, right, So

329
00:17:38,400 --> 00:17:41,280
Speaker 4: if you're tall, they play you like shack. I'm six four,

330
00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:46,040
Speaker 4: so yeah, so if if if you're like, if you're

331
00:17:46,080 --> 00:17:48,680
Speaker 4: tall and they play like shack, they beat you up.

332
00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:51,119
Speaker 4: They do all of this stuff. And at one point

333
00:17:51,480 --> 00:17:53,760
Speaker 4: I start to get mad. I remember one of the

334
00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:58,040
Speaker 4: old heads out there saying, if he starts crying, y'all'll

335
00:17:58,080 --> 00:18:01,600
Speaker 4: be ready to fight. Because everyone knew, like they would

336
00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:05,080
Speaker 4: call me cry baby. Everyone knew that my emotion would

337
00:18:05,080 --> 00:18:07,040
Speaker 4: come out on my face. And now we got to go,

338
00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:10,080
Speaker 4: you know. And it's just like I think my dad

339
00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:13,000
Speaker 4: there was a respect now. He never treated me like

340
00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:15,200
Speaker 4: his equal. There were all kinds of things that were

341
00:18:15,760 --> 00:18:17,840
Speaker 4: that was. It was tough to be around him, right.

342
00:18:17,840 --> 00:18:20,280
Speaker 4: He when I grew taller than him, he would make

343
00:18:20,280 --> 00:18:22,399
Speaker 4: me sit down before he would talk to him, you know,

344
00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:24,600
Speaker 4: like sit on the ground like he like sit on

345
00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:26,240
Speaker 4: the ground while I'm talking. He didn't want me to

346
00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:28,760
Speaker 4: little over him and stuff. But so there are all

347
00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:32,520
Speaker 4: kinds of things like in that I had to take

348
00:18:32,560 --> 00:18:34,960
Speaker 4: from him. Don't get me wrong, but I just never

349
00:18:35,040 --> 00:18:38,560
Speaker 4: had to worry. I've never, at one time in my

350
00:18:38,680 --> 00:18:41,920
Speaker 4: life to remember feeling something and not feeling like I

351
00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:45,520
Speaker 4: couldn't express it. And I think, I think if there

352
00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:47,680
Speaker 4: was the neighborhood wasn't afraid of my dad, but they

353
00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:50,439
Speaker 4: respected him, you know what I mean. He would come

354
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:53,560
Speaker 4: home with it with deer on his back, like they

355
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:57,200
Speaker 4: were enamored with him, Like he had this thing about him, right,

356
00:18:57,600 --> 00:19:01,600
Speaker 4: cowboy had gun come home You see him with with

357
00:19:01,680 --> 00:19:03,480
Speaker 4: deer and a bunch of dogs, and he'd have like

358
00:19:03,520 --> 00:19:05,720
Speaker 4: a something that he skinned on him. He was just

359
00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:07,000
Speaker 4: a difference, like a.

360
00:19:06,960 --> 00:19:09,359
Speaker 1: Real like a real one like you like walk down

361
00:19:09,400 --> 00:19:12,359
Speaker 1: the street with deers on their back. By the way,

362
00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:15,960
Speaker 1: like they didn't fear him. You think I think they

363
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,560
Speaker 1: would if he got deer on his back.

364
00:19:17,640 --> 00:19:19,480
Speaker 4: What do you I just think I just think that

365
00:19:19,600 --> 00:19:21,920
Speaker 4: I think that like it was, there was this thing

366
00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:24,000
Speaker 4: that he projected and to reviest job I've never really

367
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:26,439
Speaker 4: had this, but what I did have was just like

368
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:29,800
Speaker 4: a like a knowledge of self. And I always just

369
00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:33,640
Speaker 4: had this thing that I was like, you know, if

370
00:19:33,640 --> 00:19:37,360
Speaker 4: I'm didn't show me and like we one person from

371
00:19:37,359 --> 00:19:39,760
Speaker 4: my neighborhood that was a break fight, literally not one.

372
00:19:40,520 --> 00:19:42,639
Speaker 4: So all of that stuff was was was was was

373
00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:46,000
Speaker 4: like was besides the point, I do know people who

374
00:19:46,040 --> 00:19:48,000
Speaker 4: put on airs a little bit and acted a little

375
00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:50,080
Speaker 4: bit harder, but it was it always came from an

376
00:19:50,080 --> 00:19:52,000
Speaker 4: insecurity to me, and I never really had.

377
00:19:51,880 --> 00:19:55,560
Speaker 1: That first and foremost, the vision of your father with

378
00:19:55,680 --> 00:19:58,400
Speaker 1: deer on his back with dogs is a beautiful thing

379
00:19:58,440 --> 00:19:59,920
Speaker 1: to me, because you know, I'm I grew up he

380
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,520
Speaker 1: I can never even imagine if we saw that here

381
00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:05,000
Speaker 1: in La. Could you imagine going down ventur we see

382
00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:06,239
Speaker 1: a guy with a deer in his back, We call

383
00:20:06,240 --> 00:20:07,959
Speaker 1: on the cops, right, We're like, what's going on? This

384
00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:09,920
Speaker 1: is all this is all odd because of the world

385
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,600
Speaker 1: we live in. So to say that he was a

386
00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:17,080
Speaker 1: different man is is probably in our in our lifetime.

387
00:20:17,080 --> 00:20:21,440
Speaker 1: For me, anyways, growing up here in La is an understatement.

388
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:24,119
Speaker 1: But I read this book and I have just a

389
00:20:24,160 --> 00:20:26,920
Speaker 1: new profound or I listened because I'm to be clear,

390
00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:29,840
Speaker 1: I wasn't reading. I do audible, but I listened to

391
00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:32,959
Speaker 1: the book. So when you think of this book, what

392
00:20:33,119 --> 00:20:35,560
Speaker 1: is the biggest takeaway? Because I want to tell you

393
00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:37,560
Speaker 1: how it's been affecting a friend of mine who's a

394
00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:40,400
Speaker 1: huge fan of yours. What's the biggest takeaway? You wrote

395
00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:41,800
Speaker 1: this for what reason? To help?

396
00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:42,399
Speaker 4: Who? Do? What?

397
00:20:44,720 --> 00:20:44,919
Speaker 3: You know?

398
00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:49,360
Speaker 4: As insufficient answer as this is, I wrote this book

399
00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:51,439
Speaker 4: to exercise some of my own demons. I hope that

400
00:20:51,920 --> 00:20:53,800
Speaker 4: by casting a wide net and talking about some of

401
00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:57,639
Speaker 4: the things that that we go through, that will help someone.

402
00:20:58,440 --> 00:21:00,600
Speaker 4: If I had to pitpoint one thing, I just want

403
00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:07,560
Speaker 4: people to know it's not their fault that society. Society

404
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:09,159
Speaker 4: is this big deal that we've all come together and

405
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,960
Speaker 4: make right. We've all come together to make this big deal.

406
00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:14,159
Speaker 4: That's all it really is. It's like, you know, the serious,

407
00:21:14,359 --> 00:21:18,000
Speaker 4: very small little trees that we all take party to

408
00:21:18,080 --> 00:21:20,320
Speaker 4: live with each other. But so many of the deals

409
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:22,080
Speaker 4: that were made you didn't have a chance, you didn't

410
00:21:22,119 --> 00:21:24,439
Speaker 4: have a hand in making on so many of the

411
00:21:24,680 --> 00:21:27,000
Speaker 4: trees that were signed and were signed before you were born,

412
00:21:27,640 --> 00:21:31,199
Speaker 4: but you're still held to them, and you're raised to

413
00:21:31,280 --> 00:21:33,840
Speaker 4: be really beholden to a lot of deals that you

414
00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:37,360
Speaker 4: didn't make. So really being an adult is about figuring

415
00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:40,280
Speaker 4: out which ones of those to make stronger and which

416
00:21:40,320 --> 00:21:43,840
Speaker 4: ones of them to burn up. And like a lot

417
00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:47,520
Speaker 4: of times you don't find out what you wanted to.

418
00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:50,080
Speaker 4: It's too late, you know, And a lot of times

419
00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:52,400
Speaker 4: you just continue to blame yourself for things that aren't

420
00:21:52,440 --> 00:21:56,240
Speaker 4: your fault. So I think for me, like I would

421
00:21:56,280 --> 00:22:00,560
Speaker 4: look around at different points in my childhood, especially in

422
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:03,879
Speaker 4: college where after college I was really lonely and really wayward,

423
00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:06,479
Speaker 4: and go like, why is this mean? Why is this

424
00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:09,120
Speaker 4: happening to me? Why do I have the anxiety? Why

425
00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:11,680
Speaker 4: am I four hundred pounds or three seventy or whatever

426
00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:14,159
Speaker 4: it is? Like, why why me? I look around and

427
00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:16,520
Speaker 4: see so many people having fun with their lives and stuff,

428
00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:19,920
Speaker 4: And the moment I stopped thinking that there was something

429
00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:24,040
Speaker 4: cosmically wrong with me, my life started to change. The

430
00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:26,280
Speaker 4: moment I started to realize that some things were the

431
00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:30,399
Speaker 4: way they were because of things outside of me. The

432
00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:34,800
Speaker 4: moment I put my faith in my life into inspiration

433
00:22:34,960 --> 00:22:37,399
Speaker 4: and there's something that's that was larger than just like

434
00:22:37,480 --> 00:22:39,840
Speaker 4: loathing myself. My life started to change. And so if

435
00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:42,119
Speaker 4: there was one thing I would want people to to

436
00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:45,239
Speaker 4: take from the book is be general with yourself and

437
00:22:45,359 --> 00:22:47,560
Speaker 4: plant seeds that don't burn down as much as you

438
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:48,240
Speaker 4: think you need to.

439
00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:52,560
Speaker 1: You know, more specifically, with you. What is it that

440
00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:55,280
Speaker 1: you want to burn up? What is the what is

441
00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:57,960
Speaker 1: what have you had to say? That's just not my fault?

442
00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:11,360
Speaker 4: Cyclical generational dysfunction. There is this thing like my family

443
00:23:11,480 --> 00:23:13,560
Speaker 4: is full of some of the my community. It's full

444
00:23:13,560 --> 00:23:18,000
Speaker 4: of some of the most talented, the most beautiful, the

445
00:23:18,040 --> 00:23:21,720
Speaker 4: most amazing people ever, and just nothing happens for them.

446
00:23:22,840 --> 00:23:27,480
Speaker 4: Mm hm, they live, they die. I take my parents

447
00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:31,160
Speaker 4: for example. My mother is is one of the wisest,

448
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:34,119
Speaker 4: most giving women ever. Right, I just had COVID, just

449
00:23:34,119 --> 00:23:39,840
Speaker 4: got over COVID. I'm better now tested negative fund. But yes,

450
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:42,359
Speaker 4: But I didn't tell my mother that I had COVID.

451
00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:46,600
Speaker 4: R she she I didn't tell them. I didn't tell

452
00:23:46,640 --> 00:23:49,560
Speaker 4: my mother I had COVID that she couldn't and she

453
00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:52,240
Speaker 4: can't handle that. That's not going to be a thing.

454
00:23:52,320 --> 00:23:56,440
Speaker 4: See what happens is uh is that I'm gonna have COVID,

455
00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:59,920
Speaker 4: then I'm going to get better. Right, But my mom's

456
00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:05,679
Speaker 4: She loves so hard and worries so much that the

457
00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:08,400
Speaker 4: disease would be way worse for her than it would

458
00:24:08,400 --> 00:24:11,080
Speaker 4: be for me emotionally. And I have to know not

459
00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:12,879
Speaker 4: to give her that burden, even though I might want

460
00:24:12,920 --> 00:24:15,639
Speaker 4: to say, Hey, Mom, what kind of chicken soup? So

461
00:24:15,760 --> 00:24:17,200
Speaker 4: what should I be doing? What should I even I

462
00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:21,119
Speaker 4: don't want to have that conversation. I know that I can't, right,

463
00:24:22,840 --> 00:24:25,000
Speaker 4: but it brings me back to what I was saying

464
00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:28,359
Speaker 4: about my family. My parents around the age that I

465
00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:31,640
Speaker 4: am did something that I couldn't even realize how spectacular

466
00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:35,320
Speaker 4: it was at the time. We grew up in a

467
00:24:35,320 --> 00:24:38,280
Speaker 4: specific part of bad Rouge, but my dad was from Marryngod,

468
00:24:38,680 --> 00:24:43,639
Speaker 4: which is about thirty miles outside of bad Rouge going west.

469
00:24:43,640 --> 00:24:44,880
Speaker 4: I don't know if you've ever been to bad Ruge

470
00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:48,240
Speaker 4: before here I have, I have, okay, so if you

471
00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:48,960
Speaker 4: go over there.

472
00:24:49,520 --> 00:24:51,640
Speaker 1: I note my mother was engaged your man who lived

473
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:53,560
Speaker 1: in bad and Rouge, and I remember we went out

474
00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:54,800
Speaker 1: there when I was like eight years old, so I

475
00:24:54,800 --> 00:24:57,320
Speaker 1: don't remember much, but yes, that was back in the day.

476
00:24:57,359 --> 00:24:59,680
Speaker 4: Going might have been my dad, you never know. Yeah,

477
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:05,000
Speaker 4: he had some things going on that we didn't have

478
00:25:05,080 --> 00:25:09,440
Speaker 4: to know. But but but no, So you go over

479
00:25:09,480 --> 00:25:11,800
Speaker 4: the bridge, you go thirty minutes west Maryland. So he

480
00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:15,159
Speaker 4: lived the country lifestyle. And obviously we from a place

481
00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:19,080
Speaker 4: like VR. We're only one generation moved for people literally

482
00:25:19,119 --> 00:25:22,080
Speaker 4: coming from country areas around right. So it was always

483
00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:25,880
Speaker 4: in my parents' goal and their life goals to get

484
00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:27,960
Speaker 4: back to a place to where we had some land.

485
00:25:27,960 --> 00:25:31,240
Speaker 4: We did that. We built this big house album Zachary

486
00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:36,439
Speaker 4: on about thirty five forty acres. We had a barn,

487
00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:41,199
Speaker 4: we had a pond, We had four horses, thirteen dogs,

488
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:45,480
Speaker 4: and three wheeler, all of this stuff. It was great.

489
00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:49,240
Speaker 4: They built the life that they wanted. It lasted for

490
00:25:49,280 --> 00:25:54,760
Speaker 4: about three years. I'd say we got out there five years.

491
00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:57,280
Speaker 4: We got out there in ninety eight. By two thousand

492
00:25:57,320 --> 00:25:59,520
Speaker 4: and two they were divorced. She had moved back in

493
00:25:59,600 --> 00:26:04,400
Speaker 4: with her and the hurricane came a little bit longer.

494
00:26:04,600 --> 00:26:07,480
Speaker 4: A little bit after that. I put something through the home.

495
00:26:07,520 --> 00:26:10,000
Speaker 4: After that, Dad couldn't afford to keep it. They foreclothes

496
00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:12,440
Speaker 4: on the house. You go there, now, it looks completely different, right,

497
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,439
Speaker 4: That very thing right there is my life's goal to stop.

498
00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:21,480
Speaker 4: My life's goal is to build something lasting that generations

499
00:26:21,520 --> 00:26:23,720
Speaker 4: can build on. When my father died last year, he

500
00:26:23,800 --> 00:26:27,119
Speaker 4: died by himself. Some woman that I'd never met before

501
00:26:28,040 --> 00:26:30,240
Speaker 4: is the woman that took my father to the hospital,

502
00:26:31,880 --> 00:26:34,520
Speaker 4: And I got a DM on Instagram that said, Hey,

503
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:36,919
Speaker 4: you don't know me, but I'm your dad's girlfriend. I

504
00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:38,720
Speaker 4: just dropped the buff at the hospital. You might want

505
00:26:38,720 --> 00:26:40,920
Speaker 4: to kind of figure out what's going on with him.

506
00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:44,159
Speaker 4: I'm not blaming her, but what I'm saying is the

507
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:47,119
Speaker 4: fact that in so many places where I come from,

508
00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:52,480
Speaker 4: families can't grow generationally over time. There's nothing to show

509
00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:54,960
Speaker 4: for these lives and these people that work their asses

510
00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:57,680
Speaker 4: off right because the demons and the trauma that affect

511
00:26:57,720 --> 00:27:03,720
Speaker 4: them just seemed to destroy and disintegrate everything. My life's

512
00:27:03,720 --> 00:27:05,959
Speaker 4: goal is to stop that. My life's goal is to

513
00:27:06,640 --> 00:27:11,080
Speaker 4: build something that the people around me can pick off

514
00:27:11,119 --> 00:27:16,760
Speaker 4: of and see that it meant something. Because to me,

515
00:27:16,880 --> 00:27:19,960
Speaker 4: family is more than a name, It's more than a reputation.

516
00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:24,040
Speaker 4: It's what this group of black people have been able

517
00:27:24,080 --> 00:27:27,720
Speaker 4: over the generations to come together and create. And because

518
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:32,119
Speaker 4: of alcoholism, because of incarceration, because of drug abuse, because

519
00:27:32,119 --> 00:27:36,760
Speaker 4: of philandering, because of all of those things, we just

520
00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:38,800
Speaker 4: haven't been able to do it, and so I would

521
00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:39,399
Speaker 4: like to change that.

522
00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:43,960
Speaker 1: I salute you for that because that's a beautiful, such

523
00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:48,280
Speaker 1: a self aware assessment, and I don't want to get

524
00:27:48,280 --> 00:27:52,720
Speaker 1: into the versus, but but I often do that because

525
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:58,400
Speaker 1: I often feel that there is a lack of very

526
00:27:58,560 --> 00:28:01,920
Speaker 1: bold and loud love from black men about what it

527
00:28:01,920 --> 00:28:04,080
Speaker 1: should look like, about what they should be committed to.

528
00:28:04,359 --> 00:28:04,679
Speaker 5: Now.

529
00:28:04,920 --> 00:28:06,919
Speaker 1: Now, with that being said, every time I mention that

530
00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:09,320
Speaker 1: to a black man who's doing what he's doing, he's like, no,

531
00:28:09,560 --> 00:28:12,040
Speaker 1: because this this, and women are this, like there was

532
00:28:12,080 --> 00:28:16,080
Speaker 1: always this argument over Kevin Samuels, and I feel like

533
00:28:16,119 --> 00:28:18,520
Speaker 1: there's an all out of salt on black love. I

534
00:28:18,560 --> 00:28:22,760
Speaker 1: feel like black men and women are so at odds currently,

535
00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:25,800
Speaker 1: and if you're in a relationship, you may not see it,

536
00:28:25,840 --> 00:28:27,800
Speaker 1: but I feel like we're so at odds and there's

537
00:28:27,840 --> 00:28:29,719
Speaker 1: always but what about when y'all and what about when

538
00:28:29,800 --> 00:28:32,399
Speaker 1: y'all from both sides right? And there's just so much trauma,

539
00:28:33,040 --> 00:28:35,800
Speaker 1: as you talked about, this cyclical trauma that we have,

540
00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:39,880
Speaker 1: this generational trauma that we haven't decided to even understand

541
00:28:39,920 --> 00:28:43,000
Speaker 1: or unpack why we think and feel that way. So

542
00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:48,520
Speaker 1: I absolute you for being like on the front lines

543
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:50,760
Speaker 1: to discuss it, because in my opinion, it's rare, and

544
00:28:50,760 --> 00:28:52,360
Speaker 1: I don't see it a lot. I see it. I

545
00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:53,920
Speaker 1: see it with Shar, I see it with our friend

546
00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:55,600
Speaker 1: Shar I see with But I don't see a lot

547
00:28:55,600 --> 00:28:57,080
Speaker 1: of it. And I don't see a lot of black

548
00:28:57,120 --> 00:28:59,760
Speaker 1: men standing up for us and having our backs as

549
00:29:00,400 --> 00:29:03,760
Speaker 1: as as as I think we should see, because you know,

550
00:29:03,840 --> 00:29:05,800
Speaker 1: there's there's a continental black women who feel like we

551
00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:08,720
Speaker 1: always are doing that. Now, what is your take on that?

552
00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:10,800
Speaker 1: Because black women feel like we always taken carrery out,

553
00:29:10,840 --> 00:29:12,840
Speaker 1: we always on the front lines, we always march, and

554
00:29:12,840 --> 00:29:16,400
Speaker 1: we're always trying to in generational curses to be told

555
00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:19,360
Speaker 1: that we're not good enough or we are to demand

556
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:21,000
Speaker 1: we are too to that.

557
00:29:21,640 --> 00:29:23,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, So this is the way I look at that.

558
00:29:25,120 --> 00:29:30,800
Speaker 4: Number One, It's interesting what uh an experiment like America

559
00:29:30,800 --> 00:29:34,200
Speaker 4: will do to the right. We should be treating each

560
00:29:34,200 --> 00:29:36,120
Speaker 4: other with more grace, but we treat each other with

561
00:29:36,280 --> 00:29:40,800
Speaker 4: less grace because what we what we realize where America

562
00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:44,400
Speaker 4: has has really hammered home to Black people is they

563
00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:49,480
Speaker 4: don't take, they don't take from everybody else a little

564
00:29:49,480 --> 00:29:51,040
Speaker 4: bit of sho because they know a little bit of

565
00:29:51,520 --> 00:29:54,600
Speaker 4: they don't take you know, you know who else don't take,

566
00:29:56,160 --> 00:30:02,800
Speaker 4: just don't take all, right, So we don't we don't write,

567
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:05,680
Speaker 4: and so I think that we don't in an all

568
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:11,840
Speaker 4: out conversation between black women and black men, black men

569
00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:13,920
Speaker 4: are going to make some points and black women are

570
00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:16,040
Speaker 4: going to make some points, and on each side there's

571
00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:19,440
Speaker 4: going to be some valid points. The question is what

572
00:30:19,600 --> 00:30:23,440
Speaker 4: is the point? It's not whether or not you have

573
00:30:23,480 --> 00:30:27,040
Speaker 4: a point about what you think and whether I have

574
00:30:27,120 --> 00:30:29,880
Speaker 4: a point. What is the point? Is we have in

575
00:30:29,880 --> 00:30:33,240
Speaker 4: this conversation so we can understand how to love each

576
00:30:33,240 --> 00:30:36,480
Speaker 4: other better, or we have in this conversation so that

577
00:30:36,600 --> 00:30:38,600
Speaker 4: I can prove I'm better than you and you can

578
00:30:38,640 --> 00:30:41,320
Speaker 4: prove that you're better than me. If you ask me personally,

579
00:30:42,040 --> 00:30:43,640
Speaker 4: I think that there's a death of black men older

580
00:30:43,680 --> 00:30:46,480
Speaker 4: black women, just because the reality is a lot of

581
00:30:46,520 --> 00:30:50,040
Speaker 4: the households that I've seen growing up, besides my own,

582
00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:52,440
Speaker 4: didn't have fathers that were right there every single day.

583
00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:55,000
Speaker 4: I wasn't in those households. I don't know how it worked.

584
00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:56,880
Speaker 4: All I know is that I knew a lot of

585
00:30:56,920 --> 00:30:58,880
Speaker 4: guys that didn't see their dads all the time, right,

586
00:30:59,400 --> 00:31:02,760
Speaker 4: And so you certainly can't come back, and this is

587
00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:05,880
Speaker 4: just common sense, right. If you see a lot of

588
00:31:05,880 --> 00:31:08,400
Speaker 4: mothers doing all of this stuff by themselves, right, you

589
00:31:08,440 --> 00:31:11,720
Speaker 4: certainly can't come back and render too much judgment on

590
00:31:11,760 --> 00:31:13,720
Speaker 4: the way that they live their lives, right, or some

591
00:31:13,800 --> 00:31:15,360
Speaker 4: of the things that might be going on with them,

592
00:31:15,400 --> 00:31:17,840
Speaker 4: because you know, there's a there's a if we're talking

593
00:31:17,880 --> 00:31:20,560
Speaker 4: about community in the hole that we want it to be,

594
00:31:21,000 --> 00:31:22,680
Speaker 4: there's a debt that would be paid, and the debt

595
00:31:22,680 --> 00:31:25,280
Speaker 4: that has to be over. Having said that, all this

596
00:31:25,360 --> 00:31:30,000
Speaker 4: social media stuff is changing our perceptions about what's valuable,

597
00:31:30,640 --> 00:31:33,120
Speaker 4: and everybody has to be responsible for what it is

598
00:31:33,160 --> 00:31:36,520
Speaker 4: that they think is valuable, right Like men have to

599
00:31:36,600 --> 00:31:40,600
Speaker 4: be responsible for being able to go out and procure

600
00:31:40,640 --> 00:31:42,880
Speaker 4: the type of women that they think that they want, right,

601
00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:46,120
Speaker 4: and women are the same, and vice versa. But my

602
00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:48,320
Speaker 4: point by saying to all of this is, do you

603
00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:50,840
Speaker 4: love your sisters? Do you love your brothers? If you

604
00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:53,760
Speaker 4: have that, if you have the If you want to

605
00:31:53,760 --> 00:31:59,640
Speaker 4: see black women uh protected, exalted and value, you'll find

606
00:31:59,680 --> 00:32:02,080
Speaker 4: a way. If you want to see black men protect

607
00:32:02,120 --> 00:32:04,239
Speaker 4: it and value, you'll find a way, find a way. Way.

608
00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:05,760
Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, you know what time it is, We've got

609
00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:07,320
Speaker 1: to pay some bills. If you want to fast forward

610
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:09,040
Speaker 1: through that part, I totally get it, but I need

611
00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:11,440
Speaker 1: y'all to stick around back in a moment with more

612
00:32:11,720 --> 00:32:13,040
Speaker 1: than on naked.

613
00:32:13,560 --> 00:32:16,320
Speaker 2: Every champion and carry chappion is to be a champion,

614
00:32:16,360 --> 00:32:19,840
Speaker 2: outa champion and carry Chappion and carry chatty yata champion

615
00:32:19,880 --> 00:32:21,600
Speaker 2: and carried Sheppi and and carry.

616
00:32:21,400 --> 00:32:23,560
Speaker 3: Chappyfrad Is this sport and entertainment?

617
00:32:23,600 --> 00:32:24,120
Speaker 4: Get naked?

618
00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:24,320
Speaker 3: Weird?

619
00:32:24,600 --> 00:32:24,760
Speaker 4: Look?

620
00:32:26,080 --> 00:32:29,120
Speaker 2: Every champion and carry Chappy is to be a champiata

621
00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:32,480
Speaker 2: champion and carry Sheppy and nigger shot a champion and

622
00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:36,120
Speaker 2: carry Sheppion and carried shepyfraid is entertainment?

623
00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:36,640
Speaker 4: Get naked?

624
00:32:36,720 --> 00:32:40,240
Speaker 1: Were welcome back. If you listen to the commercials, you're

625
00:32:40,240 --> 00:32:43,000
Speaker 1: a saint and you really love me? No, seriously, you

626
00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:47,760
Speaker 1: really do. Van Lathan or naked we gotta go to

627
00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:51,720
Speaker 1: the genesis. The reality is is you're right. Sometimes you're

628
00:32:51,800 --> 00:32:53,800
Speaker 1: arguing to figure out who's right or who's wrong, but

629
00:32:54,080 --> 00:32:56,800
Speaker 1: at the end of the day, it's the actual education

630
00:32:56,840 --> 00:32:58,920
Speaker 1: of understanding what it looks like to value and if

631
00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:01,040
Speaker 1: it's not mirrored, if it's not understood, if you don't

632
00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:02,800
Speaker 1: see the vision of it. It's hard for you to

633
00:33:02,840 --> 00:33:05,960
Speaker 1: illustrate it or replicate it in every in every possible way.

634
00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:09,520
Speaker 1: To your original point, black women have to been the

635
00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:12,400
Speaker 1: breadwinners if you are in the home. And I'm not

636
00:33:12,480 --> 00:33:16,080
Speaker 1: saying that with a like a badge of honor. I

637
00:33:16,120 --> 00:33:18,440
Speaker 1: don't I don't want to do that. I don't want

638
00:33:18,440 --> 00:33:20,760
Speaker 1: to be the only one in here hustling. But there

639
00:33:20,800 --> 00:33:23,400
Speaker 1: is something and I know, I know society plays into

640
00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:25,880
Speaker 1: this as well, but there is something, which is why

641
00:33:25,920 --> 00:33:31,080
Speaker 1: I say to you. I find myself saying to you,

642
00:33:31,160 --> 00:33:34,160
Speaker 1: I'm grateful for your honesty and you being able to

643
00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:37,320
Speaker 1: express yourself and you using your platform to highlight things.

644
00:33:37,480 --> 00:33:39,000
Speaker 1: And I always agree with what you say. That is

645
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:42,120
Speaker 1: that's neither here nor there, but the overall messaging, the

646
00:33:42,160 --> 00:33:45,040
Speaker 1: overall messaging is like I see a black man really

647
00:33:45,040 --> 00:33:48,120
Speaker 1: doing the work, and that is such a beautiful, encouraging

648
00:33:48,200 --> 00:33:52,320
Speaker 1: thing to me. We need to stick together, we need

649
00:33:52,360 --> 00:33:54,440
Speaker 1: to have each other's back, that's all it is at

650
00:33:54,440 --> 00:33:56,200
Speaker 1: the end of the day. And I don't see that.

651
00:33:56,200 --> 00:33:59,160
Speaker 1: That's what makes me sad. But that's what I say

652
00:33:59,160 --> 00:34:00,000
Speaker 1: that I love about you.

653
00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:02,360
Speaker 4: Why don't you see that though, because because I see

654
00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:04,680
Speaker 4: it a lot. Tell me where you like, where you

655
00:34:04,760 --> 00:34:06,600
Speaker 4: where you where you looking?

656
00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:11,760
Speaker 1: Well, I see it in because because i'm.

657
00:34:10,640 --> 00:34:13,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, so im so this is what I'm saying. So

658
00:34:13,520 --> 00:34:16,799
Speaker 4: like a lot of things that we're talking about, they're real,

659
00:34:16,840 --> 00:34:20,200
Speaker 4: but sometimes they can be overstated. Like I know, so, look,

660
00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:25,239
Speaker 4: the absent black father is a thing, but not like

661
00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:27,759
Speaker 4: they say they who you know what I mean?

662
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:30,960
Speaker 1: The white man? They the white people.

663
00:34:31,000 --> 00:34:34,040
Speaker 4: Fox News and white people. Yeah, not like they say,

664
00:34:34,200 --> 00:34:36,000
Speaker 4: you know what I mean. It's not like they say.

665
00:34:36,239 --> 00:34:38,000
Speaker 4: Some of these things are unconvincual. Some of these things

666
00:34:38,080 --> 00:34:41,160
Speaker 4: different for me. I look around and I look at

667
00:34:41,200 --> 00:34:44,920
Speaker 4: my homies who were in the world. You won't find

668
00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:51,600
Speaker 4: a worst group. I agree, But you don't think.

669
00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:54,760
Speaker 1: That's now I agree because I know some of your friends.

670
00:34:54,840 --> 00:35:00,360
Speaker 1: I agree. So what I'm saying is for of the

671
00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:03,759
Speaker 1: feather truly flock together. If I hear this is what

672
00:35:03,840 --> 00:35:05,400
Speaker 1: I hear. Here's what I'm hearing when I'm out in

673
00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:06,920
Speaker 1: the streets. So we do these interviews that we talk

674
00:35:06,960 --> 00:35:09,759
Speaker 1: to different people. And if I have a conversation off

675
00:35:09,760 --> 00:35:12,680
Speaker 1: the record with a black man of note with success

676
00:35:13,360 --> 00:35:17,160
Speaker 1: with value with the platform, like you do, and like

677
00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:19,640
Speaker 1: I said, I'm not including you or the homies in it,

678
00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:23,640
Speaker 1: but I always this would I always hear, well, black

679
00:35:23,680 --> 00:35:26,160
Speaker 1: women always want something they can. They always shoot, and

680
00:35:26,200 --> 00:35:29,200
Speaker 1: they shot, and they always expect this, and they really

681
00:35:29,320 --> 00:35:31,960
Speaker 1: look at them They should look at themselves because you

682
00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:34,200
Speaker 1: know they don't do and it's usually down to vanity.

683
00:35:34,320 --> 00:35:37,719
Speaker 1: It's what was the aesthetic is like, she's not in shape,

684
00:35:37,719 --> 00:35:39,719
Speaker 1: shown workout, but she want a man that's you know,

685
00:35:39,840 --> 00:35:42,800
Speaker 1: makes six figures or just stupid. To me, that doesn't

686
00:35:42,800 --> 00:35:45,680
Speaker 1: even matter, but matters to you all because aesthetics are

687
00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:49,360
Speaker 1: very important. And I believe with and this is not

688
00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:51,000
Speaker 1: a blanket statement, but black women, you.

689
00:35:51,120 --> 00:35:55,680
Speaker 4: Just jumped right over what the purpose of that was though, Wait.

690
00:35:55,520 --> 00:35:57,440
Speaker 1: Go ahead, tell me what did I jump over?

691
00:35:57,600 --> 00:36:03,880
Speaker 4: So aesthetics? Right, So there's a guy that's feeling used

692
00:36:05,440 --> 00:36:06,920
Speaker 4: because he mentioned money.

693
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:10,359
Speaker 1: Well that's so this is great. Let's get into this

694
00:36:10,400 --> 00:36:13,240
Speaker 1: because let's talk about the money into the esthetic.

695
00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 4: Go ahead, well, let's let's talk about it. So there's

696
00:36:16,680 --> 00:36:19,919
Speaker 4: a guy that's saying, like, there's a guy that's saying

697
00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:22,799
Speaker 4: he didn't just say, oh, he said, black women want

698
00:36:22,800 --> 00:36:25,400
Speaker 4: a man that makes this much money, but they're not

699
00:36:25,520 --> 00:36:29,839
Speaker 4: willing to do this. Well, I mean that's nothing but facts, right,

700
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:36,040
Speaker 4: I mean I'm being real with you. Wait wait a second, Wait,

701
00:36:36,239 --> 00:36:38,879
Speaker 4: wait a second, Wait a second. Here's the deal. Here's

702
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:42,680
Speaker 4: the deal. Here's the deal. If if you if you're

703
00:36:42,719 --> 00:36:45,400
Speaker 4: out in the world and you're being open to the universe,

704
00:36:45,840 --> 00:36:49,560
Speaker 4: right to the love speak and you're being open to

705
00:36:49,600 --> 00:36:52,800
Speaker 4: the universe, yes, and and love comes to you, that's fine.

706
00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:54,680
Speaker 4: But if you go out there and you put a

707
00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:59,040
Speaker 4: bunch of standards, not standards, standards, or if you put

708
00:36:59,080 --> 00:37:04,680
Speaker 4: a bunch of qualificing requirements, then it is completely natural

709
00:37:05,160 --> 00:37:09,359
Speaker 4: that there should be requirements coming in the other way. Oh, absolutely.

710
00:37:10,280 --> 00:37:13,719
Speaker 1: Right, I absolutely say something. Can I say something? And

711
00:37:13,760 --> 00:37:14,680
Speaker 1: it works both ways?

712
00:37:14,760 --> 00:37:14,920
Speaker 4: Right?

713
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:18,000
Speaker 1: So I'll start with the women. Like all I hear

714
00:37:18,040 --> 00:37:20,399
Speaker 1: consistently black women if I tell you, and maybe it's

715
00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:21,920
Speaker 1: the world that I live in and work in. If

716
00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:25,239
Speaker 1: I hear black women don't work out and and and

717
00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:28,080
Speaker 1: look at you, you giggling because you know that's what

718
00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:29,160
Speaker 1: is being somebody?

719
00:37:29,600 --> 00:37:34,319
Speaker 4: Yea, even that I don't see that I live in

720
00:37:34,360 --> 00:37:35,200
Speaker 4: Los Angeles.

721
00:37:35,440 --> 00:37:39,120
Speaker 1: Every Oh, you like, this argument hasn't been talking to

722
00:37:39,120 --> 00:37:41,279
Speaker 1: you before? Has this argument been said? You'd be like

723
00:37:41,320 --> 00:37:42,960
Speaker 1: I like your machine to get in shape. If I

724
00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:45,279
Speaker 1: hear something about a black woman doesn't work out, or

725
00:37:45,320 --> 00:37:47,799
Speaker 1: I like her all natural, or I like and I'm

726
00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:49,839
Speaker 1: not even And by the way, this isn't coming from

727
00:37:49,880 --> 00:37:52,680
Speaker 1: a woman that is unattractive and not in shape. I'm

728
00:37:52,680 --> 00:37:54,960
Speaker 1: not referring to me. But I when I hear that,

729
00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:57,319
Speaker 1: When I hear this, I'm like, look at you. You

730
00:37:57,360 --> 00:38:01,279
Speaker 1: gotta you gotta belly. Your head's not shaped. Why you

731
00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:05,920
Speaker 1: you can see I hear men meet a background, the

732
00:38:05,920 --> 00:38:10,160
Speaker 1: way her left toe moves. It's just say, I don't know.

733
00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:14,000
Speaker 4: That's just a yeah, that's that's that is like I

734
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:17,560
Speaker 4: that's a funny thing about men. A funny thing about man?

735
00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:20,680
Speaker 4: Is that's just a funny thing about manny, annoying?

736
00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:21,560
Speaker 1: Going tell me?

737
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:24,840
Speaker 4: Tell me why is a funny thing about a funny

738
00:38:24,840 --> 00:38:27,319
Speaker 4: thing about men? Is so like listen to men like

739
00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:31,719
Speaker 4: critique calle Berry. I don't really do it like that.

740
00:38:31,800 --> 00:38:43,239
Speaker 4: I'm like, is she but but but I was but

741
00:38:43,239 --> 00:38:46,759
Speaker 4: but but I say this though in La though I

742
00:38:46,840 --> 00:38:49,720
Speaker 4: remember it is like if you're going to a club

743
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:52,719
Speaker 4: and a guy can't buy bottles if you don't drive

744
00:38:52,719 --> 00:38:55,920
Speaker 4: a certain car. These men feel like they're scrutinized in

745
00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:59,120
Speaker 4: a very specific way too. And then on Instagram and

746
00:38:59,160 --> 00:39:02,640
Speaker 4: all of this stuff, it's different. All of these guys

747
00:39:02,640 --> 00:39:05,000
Speaker 4: that you know, Carrie, you want to be honest with you,

748
00:39:05,040 --> 00:39:10,000
Speaker 4: they're rich, so so big.

749
00:39:11,280 --> 00:39:17,680
Speaker 1: Wait talking about I love this conversation. Listen, all the

750
00:39:17,760 --> 00:39:21,480
Speaker 1: women I also know have changed as well. Right, So

751
00:39:21,640 --> 00:39:23,960
Speaker 1: if they said, but no, I'm gonna say this, I

752
00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:26,840
Speaker 1: present a bad woman, a whole package. A guy's not

753
00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:30,279
Speaker 1: worried a black man with money. And I'm not gonna

754
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:32,040
Speaker 1: say all black man, but black man of a certain

755
00:39:32,120 --> 00:39:35,319
Speaker 1: means who have because they're so Because because when you

756
00:39:35,320 --> 00:39:37,239
Speaker 1: guys get to this level, there's so few of you.

757
00:39:37,239 --> 00:39:39,400
Speaker 1: You know it. You know it, and you walk like

758
00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:42,239
Speaker 1: it and you carry it and you weaponize it, and

759
00:39:42,360 --> 00:39:44,439
Speaker 1: a lot of in a lot of instances, not most,

760
00:39:44,520 --> 00:39:49,359
Speaker 1: but in a lot of instances. And when I say, oh,

761
00:39:49,400 --> 00:39:50,520
Speaker 1: I got a friend, she's bad.

762
00:39:50,600 --> 00:39:53,000
Speaker 6: She a whole package, she got money, she work out,

763
00:39:53,520 --> 00:39:55,680
Speaker 6: she's this, she's a ah, it's just not my type

764
00:39:55,680 --> 00:39:58,720
Speaker 6: because she doesn't look like what they think they should

765
00:39:58,719 --> 00:40:00,680
Speaker 6: be with because they got a little bit to change.

766
00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:04,279
Speaker 1: Like, that's just crazy to me. We are far more

767
00:40:04,360 --> 00:40:06,520
Speaker 1: women are far more smarter in the way they choose

768
00:40:06,560 --> 00:40:10,120
Speaker 1: their mate. Y'all all right here right? She could be

769
00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:10,759
Speaker 1: dumb as all.

770
00:40:10,680 --> 00:40:12,640
Speaker 4: Get do you do you?

771
00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:15,040
Speaker 1: And you don't even care?

772
00:40:15,280 --> 00:40:19,520
Speaker 4: I don't wait wait, I don't think that's true at all.

773
00:40:19,560 --> 00:40:22,200
Speaker 4: I think women get the picture first. Like let's take

774
00:40:22,239 --> 00:40:26,480
Speaker 4: it like like like Sierra, right, okay, let's take Sierra

775
00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:29,360
Speaker 4: and Russell. They got a perfect little they got a

776
00:40:29,360 --> 00:40:33,000
Speaker 4: perfect little marriage, right, Russell is the Russell is the

777
00:40:33,160 --> 00:40:38,920
Speaker 4: picture perfect husband right for what we know, perfect husband,

778
00:40:39,440 --> 00:40:46,759
Speaker 4: little man. How many stops at boy mansion she made?

779
00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:50,320
Speaker 1: She made a time, So don't tell.

780
00:40:50,160 --> 00:40:52,200
Speaker 4: Me we're better. Don't don't say women are better at

781
00:40:52,239 --> 00:40:56,320
Speaker 4: choosing mates. Like I'm telling you right now, I don't know.

782
00:40:58,239 --> 00:41:00,160
Speaker 1: Let me tell you something. Let me tell you. I'm

783
00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:02,840
Speaker 1: saying what you're seeing. Yes, she did make she was

784
00:41:02,880 --> 00:41:04,680
Speaker 1: dating a bunch of boys. You're right, but what you're

785
00:41:04,719 --> 00:41:09,080
Speaker 1: also seeing is women who we naturally feel like we

786
00:41:09,120 --> 00:41:11,440
Speaker 1: can help you, and we want to help change you,

787
00:41:11,480 --> 00:41:13,359
Speaker 1: and we want to help grow you. It's not so

788
00:41:13,440 --> 00:41:16,399
Speaker 1: much about what you're not at that moment, it's what

789
00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:19,120
Speaker 1: we can see. And I'm sure she thought when she

790
00:41:19,280 --> 00:41:22,840
Speaker 1: was first with old boy future for instance, she decided

791
00:41:22,840 --> 00:41:24,360
Speaker 1: to have a baby with him. This is it, This

792
00:41:24,480 --> 00:41:25,920
Speaker 1: is it. I can see who he's gonna be. I'm

793
00:41:25,920 --> 00:41:28,239
Speaker 1: gonna grow with him. I'm da da da. They break up,

794
00:41:28,280 --> 00:41:29,279
Speaker 1: and how does he be many?

795
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:32,040
Speaker 4: How many children? How many children the future have at

796
00:41:32,080 --> 00:41:32,839
Speaker 4: this point?

797
00:41:33,160 --> 00:41:38,319
Speaker 1: Listen, she saw that he loves So you're right, right, No,

798
00:41:38,400 --> 00:41:39,640
Speaker 1: you're absolutely.

799
00:41:39,280 --> 00:41:43,080
Speaker 4: What I'm saying is the future they need love to

800
00:41:43,239 --> 00:41:46,000
Speaker 4: I'm not taking anything away. Like I know a lot

801
00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:48,080
Speaker 4: of guys who have been future asked, I'm not taking

802
00:41:48,120 --> 00:41:50,719
Speaker 4: anything away from future. I don't have any problems. Y'all

803
00:41:50,719 --> 00:41:53,560
Speaker 4: don't like future. Future is a certain way. That's fine.

804
00:41:53,600 --> 00:41:55,960
Speaker 4: What I'm saying is this. What I'm saying. What I'm

805
00:41:55,960 --> 00:41:59,160
Speaker 4: saying is this. I don't think either side is great

806
00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:02,840
Speaker 4: at choosing mates, because you don't choose a mate. A

807
00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:06,959
Speaker 4: mate chooses you as long as like, as as long

808
00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:11,879
Speaker 4: as you are open or open like it happens all

809
00:42:11,920 --> 00:42:16,160
Speaker 4: the time, it happens all the time.

810
00:42:16,360 --> 00:42:22,440
Speaker 1: That's not true. Yeah, yes, But then you're talking about

811
00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:27,520
Speaker 1: an elevated sense of consciousness that just doesn't exist in

812
00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:29,839
Speaker 1: a community where men have been taught to hold their

813
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:33,120
Speaker 1: feelings back and not express themselves. You were talking about

814
00:42:33,200 --> 00:42:35,719
Speaker 1: being open to love and it will come and find you.

815
00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:39,480
Speaker 1: So you're saying you're operating like people are operating like

816
00:42:39,520 --> 00:42:41,640
Speaker 1: that in our culture and that as the collective. I

817
00:42:41,760 --> 00:42:44,040
Speaker 1: just don't think that that's true on both sides.

818
00:42:45,960 --> 00:42:49,000
Speaker 4: I think that they're saying that they're not, but they're

819
00:42:49,040 --> 00:42:52,680
Speaker 4: going back home and somebody is getting them right. I

820
00:42:52,719 --> 00:42:56,760
Speaker 4: think that they're I think one thing that women don't

821
00:42:57,000 --> 00:42:58,239
Speaker 4: if I was to say there was one thing that

822
00:42:58,280 --> 00:43:04,239
Speaker 4: women don't understand, is that men we are. I'm I'm

823
00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:07,920
Speaker 4: with these guys. I know how they act, I know

824
00:43:08,440 --> 00:43:11,919
Speaker 4: what the deal is. I know why they act out,

825
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:15,600
Speaker 4: I know why they do certain things. They talk a

826
00:43:15,640 --> 00:43:18,920
Speaker 4: lot of shit, but what they want is to be loved.

827
00:43:19,880 --> 00:43:23,600
Speaker 4: No man that I know is with the baddest woman

828
00:43:23,600 --> 00:43:24,520
Speaker 4: that they've ever been with.

829
00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:26,960
Speaker 1: Interesting, I am.

830
00:43:26,920 --> 00:43:32,120
Speaker 4: But no man, but but but but but but but

831
00:43:32,440 --> 00:43:35,799
Speaker 4: no man that I know is with the baddest woman

832
00:43:35,840 --> 00:43:39,120
Speaker 4: they've ever been with. They're not like not that I

833
00:43:39,280 --> 00:43:41,560
Speaker 4: not that I know. Now. Look, I'm also I don't

834
00:43:41,560 --> 00:43:44,160
Speaker 4: hang out with these rappers, and I don't be in

835
00:43:44,200 --> 00:43:48,600
Speaker 4: these different situations like whatever, none of that. Like like,

836
00:43:48,719 --> 00:43:51,319
Speaker 4: people exist on certain wavelengks. I think a lot of

837
00:43:51,320 --> 00:43:54,239
Speaker 4: this Twitter conversation, all of this back and forth. I

838
00:43:54,280 --> 00:43:56,799
Speaker 4: think it's for people's entertainment. And I'll be honest with you,

839
00:43:57,280 --> 00:44:00,480
Speaker 4: I think that our parents and grandparents problem we had

840
00:44:00,560 --> 00:44:04,399
Speaker 4: these same types of conversations. You should marry, You should

841
00:44:04,480 --> 00:44:07,839
Speaker 4: marry mister Johnny. He owns his own story. Sure, don't

842
00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:10,359
Speaker 4: marry that boy, just like you. I think. I think

843
00:44:10,360 --> 00:44:11,680
Speaker 4: this has always been a thing.

844
00:44:11,840 --> 00:44:13,799
Speaker 1: No, but options have change. Here's the thing. I read

845
00:44:13,840 --> 00:44:15,560
Speaker 1: this New York Times article the other day. Your girl

846
00:44:15,560 --> 00:44:17,239
Speaker 1: has sent it to me, probably three months ago. Not

847
00:44:17,239 --> 00:44:19,080
Speaker 1: that it means anything, but it gave me a very

848
00:44:19,120 --> 00:44:25,399
Speaker 1: interesting perspective. Women don't have to although they wanted. God

849
00:44:25,480 --> 00:44:27,719
Speaker 1: made it, made it so that men and women should

850
00:44:27,719 --> 00:44:30,120
Speaker 1: be together and pro create. Right, that's just our natural

851
00:44:30,160 --> 00:44:32,799
Speaker 1: instinct and that's what we should have. But the day

852
00:44:32,960 --> 00:44:35,200
Speaker 1: of settling and being with somebody, even if they're a

853
00:44:35,239 --> 00:44:38,440
Speaker 1: jerk and aren't doing well and he's the only person

854
00:44:38,480 --> 00:44:41,480
Speaker 1: that can work in the family, those days are over.

855
00:44:42,560 --> 00:44:45,960
Speaker 1: My grandmother or my great grandmother, never had an option.

856
00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:48,839
Speaker 1: She had to marry Johnny's little boy because she needs

857
00:44:48,880 --> 00:44:53,000
Speaker 1: she five. She had to marry Johnny's little boy, because

858
00:44:53,000 --> 00:44:56,719
Speaker 1: she had no choice, because she had to do what

859
00:44:56,800 --> 00:44:59,319
Speaker 1: she had to do, because she couldn't make ends meet

860
00:44:59,360 --> 00:45:02,200
Speaker 1: for herself or by yourself to support a family. So

861
00:45:02,239 --> 00:45:06,480
Speaker 1: a lot of women married men out of obligation. You

862
00:45:06,560 --> 00:45:09,920
Speaker 1: know that we've we have come so far from that

863
00:45:10,000 --> 00:45:12,080
Speaker 1: moment now and now that women are I got my

864
00:45:12,160 --> 00:45:13,840
Speaker 1: own and I don't need, and I don't need and

865
00:45:13,880 --> 00:45:17,360
Speaker 1: I got my own, it really is hard for the

866
00:45:17,440 --> 00:45:20,560
Speaker 1: two to meet, especially in our culture. I think. So

867
00:45:20,640 --> 00:45:22,440
Speaker 1: you're talking about a group of men that you're around,

868
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:24,680
Speaker 1: I just feel like you guys are a special sect.

869
00:45:24,920 --> 00:45:26,280
Speaker 1: And you're right at the end of the day, everybody

870
00:45:26,280 --> 00:45:28,440
Speaker 1: wants to be loved, but you're a special sect. I

871
00:45:28,480 --> 00:45:29,319
Speaker 1: think you.

872
00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:31,560
Speaker 4: So let me tell you. Let me tell you. I

873
00:45:32,560 --> 00:45:36,520
Speaker 4: think I think choices. I think choices about a matrix, right,

874
00:45:36,560 --> 00:45:39,080
Speaker 4: I think choices about the choice matrix, right, like you

875
00:45:39,719 --> 00:45:42,920
Speaker 4: like choice is about Okay, So like growing up where

876
00:45:42,920 --> 00:45:45,239
Speaker 4: I grew up, Right, it was like, oh god, that

877
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:48,160
Speaker 4: don't deal drugs, right, It's easy, don't deal drugs? Right? Well,

878
00:45:48,640 --> 00:45:52,560
Speaker 4: what if dealing drugs is on the table? Right? If

879
00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:54,719
Speaker 4: dealing drugs is on the table, if that's like a

880
00:45:54,800 --> 00:45:57,360
Speaker 4: viable thing to do. It's actually not so easy not

881
00:45:57,440 --> 00:45:59,520
Speaker 4: to do it because it's actually a choice. Right, if

882
00:45:59,520 --> 00:46:01,600
Speaker 4: you grew up in another place, it's not even on

883
00:46:01,640 --> 00:46:05,640
Speaker 4: the table. Like if you grew up maybe in I

884
00:46:05,680 --> 00:46:08,600
Speaker 4: don't know, in Bocas or someplace across town. No one

885
00:46:08,640 --> 00:46:10,719
Speaker 4: even thinks that you're gonna deal drugs. You don't. You

886
00:46:10,760 --> 00:46:13,239
Speaker 4: don't run with drug dealers. It's not a choice, right.

887
00:46:13,440 --> 00:46:14,719
Speaker 4: So this while this is how I look at what

888
00:46:14,760 --> 00:46:16,720
Speaker 4: you're saying. Right now, I see a lot of girls

889
00:46:16,719 --> 00:46:19,520
Speaker 4: in Dubai. They go to Dubai. We know that they

890
00:46:19,560 --> 00:46:23,399
Speaker 4: didn't go to Dubai. We know that someone sent them

891
00:46:23,400 --> 00:46:26,960
Speaker 4: to Dubai. Sure is their choice whether or not to

892
00:46:27,000 --> 00:46:30,879
Speaker 4: go to Dubai, But it's actually not a choice because

893
00:46:30,880 --> 00:46:33,120
Speaker 4: if they want to go to Dubai, there are certain

894
00:46:33,160 --> 00:46:38,440
Speaker 4: things they have to do, and that for some people.

895
00:46:38,960 --> 00:46:41,360
Speaker 4: If you want to live a certain lifestyle, if you

896
00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:44,960
Speaker 4: want to live a certain lifestyle, if you're enamored with

897
00:46:45,040 --> 00:46:50,080
Speaker 4: a certain lifestyle, male or female, there's certain things you

898
00:46:50,600 --> 00:46:54,960
Speaker 4: have to do and so and so to me, I look,

899
00:46:55,160 --> 00:46:56,880
Speaker 4: I look at it's kind of like what it is

900
00:46:56,880 --> 00:46:59,800
Speaker 4: that people want. I think, if you want love and connection.

901
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:02,799
Speaker 4: You can find that anywhere. If you want to go

902
00:47:02,840 --> 00:47:05,000
Speaker 4: to win, it's only a couple of niggas that could

903
00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:09,120
Speaker 4: take you there. So you need to, like, you need

904
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:12,160
Speaker 4: to find those gods kind of figure out how are

905
00:47:12,200 --> 00:47:13,200
Speaker 4: you going to get that story.

906
00:47:13,400 --> 00:47:16,719
Speaker 1: Whenever I have this conversation, it ultimately deteriorates into who

907
00:47:16,800 --> 00:47:19,320
Speaker 1: has a bag? Women want a guy with a bag,

908
00:47:19,400 --> 00:47:23,480
Speaker 1: and men want a bad bitch. These conversations only deteriorate

909
00:47:23,560 --> 00:47:26,120
Speaker 1: to this the bitch woman nigga with all the money,

910
00:47:26,320 --> 00:47:28,040
Speaker 1: and they do want the badest bitch in the game.

911
00:47:29,280 --> 00:47:33,239
Speaker 1: I can never have this conversation. And then when someone

912
00:47:33,239 --> 00:47:35,160
Speaker 1: comes in and says, well, no, that's just not true,

913
00:47:35,400 --> 00:47:38,040
Speaker 1: because here's what's happening. I think what you're telling me

914
00:47:38,080 --> 00:47:40,439
Speaker 1: and what I'm hearing is that there's a certain you're

915
00:47:40,480 --> 00:47:42,480
Speaker 1: like in my spercle carry that doesn't exist. I don't

916
00:47:42,480 --> 00:47:44,000
Speaker 1: know what you're talking about black men or emotional. They

917
00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:46,200
Speaker 1: talk about their feeling blah blah blah blah, and I'm like, no,

918
00:47:46,560 --> 00:47:49,000
Speaker 1: actually no, I don't see that. So you see that,

919
00:47:49,239 --> 00:47:51,600
Speaker 1: and then I ultimately hear, but these girls are out

920
00:47:51,600 --> 00:47:54,080
Speaker 1: here big chasing a bag, only dating guys who can

921
00:47:54,080 --> 00:47:55,560
Speaker 1: take them to Jubai. They want to be on the PJ.

922
00:47:55,600 --> 00:47:56,760
Speaker 1: Blah blah blah blah blah.

923
00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:59,480
Speaker 4: I feel like girls the small second.

924
00:48:00,920 --> 00:48:02,760
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. I don't know any girls

925
00:48:02,760 --> 00:48:06,120
Speaker 1: like that, but I always, I always hear that I

926
00:48:06,160 --> 00:48:08,240
Speaker 1: don't know women like that. Everybody I know is busting

927
00:48:08,320 --> 00:48:10,319
Speaker 1: balls and working hard and doing it on their own

928
00:48:10,440 --> 00:48:13,040
Speaker 1: and figuring it out and looking for love in the process,

929
00:48:13,120 --> 00:48:15,000
Speaker 1: right whether or if they're with their mate trying to

930
00:48:15,040 --> 00:48:18,120
Speaker 1: win for their mate too. I don't know that world.

931
00:48:18,160 --> 00:48:21,200
Speaker 1: So I think what's happening is that because of social media,

932
00:48:21,320 --> 00:48:24,759
Speaker 1: we are really blinded by what it is like. We

933
00:48:24,920 --> 00:48:29,080
Speaker 1: just it's it's so confusing and mucky and muddy, and

934
00:48:29,120 --> 00:48:32,520
Speaker 1: you say, I want to back to this point and

935
00:48:32,640 --> 00:48:35,800
Speaker 1: not real like it's not real life. It's not real life.

936
00:48:36,280 --> 00:48:39,160
Speaker 1: But I know men are motivated by getting money because

937
00:48:39,160 --> 00:48:42,279
Speaker 1: they think they can have women. I know men are

938
00:48:42,320 --> 00:48:46,600
Speaker 1: like when they get money, they are ageless, they are weightless,

939
00:48:47,040 --> 00:48:51,919
Speaker 1: they are whatever it is belly ball two thousand years old.

940
00:48:52,200 --> 00:48:54,440
Speaker 1: If I got Brad, I don't care. And to me,

941
00:48:54,640 --> 00:48:56,400
Speaker 1: a lot of that is a motivating factor with a

942
00:48:56,400 --> 00:48:58,280
Speaker 1: lot of men because they want to live this life

943
00:48:58,280 --> 00:49:00,359
Speaker 1: with them. You say they won't love, but I feel

944
00:49:00,400 --> 00:49:02,239
Speaker 1: like I see this. I was like, I want bread,

945
00:49:02,239 --> 00:49:03,759
Speaker 1: I want bread, I want money because I know I'm

946
00:49:03,840 --> 00:49:06,760
Speaker 1: to have women. Literally, Am I wrong? Is that wrong?

947
00:49:06,960 --> 00:49:09,280
Speaker 4: You're not, but I do think but you're not. But

948
00:49:09,280 --> 00:49:11,520
Speaker 4: but I do think this though you're not wrong at all.

949
00:49:11,680 --> 00:49:16,000
Speaker 4: But this only thing I say, number one, it's not

950
00:49:18,320 --> 00:49:21,560
Speaker 4: it's not. So this is an argument I have with

951
00:49:21,640 --> 00:49:26,000
Speaker 4: men about women. Boston College, Nick Sai Nick Saban was

952
00:49:26,040 --> 00:49:28,879
Speaker 4: the coach LSU. I remember a friend of ours, very

953
00:49:28,880 --> 00:49:32,560
Speaker 4: beautiful woman who was like our same age, that said

954
00:49:32,600 --> 00:49:37,239
Speaker 4: she was attracted to Nick Saban. And we at this

955
00:49:37,280 --> 00:49:39,759
Speaker 4: point we look we all we all looked at we

956
00:49:39,800 --> 00:49:43,080
Speaker 4: all looked at Nick sabans Remember we're twenty two, twenty

957
00:49:43,120 --> 00:49:44,920
Speaker 4: three years old. We all looked at Nick Saban. We're like,

958
00:49:45,000 --> 00:49:47,960
Speaker 4: what you're like, are you talking about She's like no,

959
00:49:48,200 --> 00:49:50,720
Speaker 4: She's like, I'm attracted to Nick Saban, Like Nick Saban's

960
00:49:50,719 --> 00:49:53,520
Speaker 4: an attractive god. And I'm like, why would Nick Savan

961
00:49:53,560 --> 00:49:56,920
Speaker 4: be attracted? And what she was talking about and this

962
00:49:57,000 --> 00:49:58,920
Speaker 4: is a this is a difference where there were things

963
00:49:58,960 --> 00:50:02,400
Speaker 4: about coach Saban that were attractive to her didn't have

964
00:50:02,440 --> 00:50:05,759
Speaker 4: anything to do necessarily with how he looked. How he

965
00:50:05,800 --> 00:50:10,240
Speaker 4: looked wasn't just enough of a distraction to take away

966
00:50:10,280 --> 00:50:12,960
Speaker 4: from the fact that he was assertive, the fact that

967
00:50:13,000 --> 00:50:15,480
Speaker 4: he was a leader, the fact that he was secure,

968
00:50:15,640 --> 00:50:17,839
Speaker 4: the fact that he seemed like a protector, all kinds

969
00:50:17,880 --> 00:50:20,640
Speaker 4: of things that women would actually be attracted to a man,

970
00:50:20,840 --> 00:50:25,320
Speaker 4: the same reason why some women were attracted to Bill Clinton.

971
00:50:25,400 --> 00:50:29,200
Speaker 4: Bill Clinton was handsome for a president, you know what

972
00:50:29,280 --> 00:50:30,919
Speaker 4: I mean. Oh, Bill Clinton was doing this thing.

973
00:50:31,320 --> 00:50:33,920
Speaker 1: But the power the power of stars. I just saw

974
00:50:34,000 --> 00:50:35,600
Speaker 1: him the other night. You ain't got to tell me.

975
00:50:35,719 --> 00:50:39,920
Speaker 4: Right, Okay, cool? That doesn't exist for like men. So

976
00:50:40,280 --> 00:50:43,000
Speaker 4: that's the thing, Like men don't look at like, uh,

977
00:50:44,000 --> 00:50:47,279
Speaker 4: like I don't know Angela Merkle from Germany and be

978
00:50:47,400 --> 00:50:50,160
Speaker 4: like shit, God damn, she were all in Germany. Like

979
00:50:50,239 --> 00:50:53,080
Speaker 4: that's what I'm talking about. Like that doesn't exist, right,

980
00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:56,839
Speaker 4: So the etics are different, right, And so what I'm

981
00:50:56,880 --> 00:51:00,360
Speaker 4: saying is when women, like I think some times we

982
00:51:00,400 --> 00:51:03,120
Speaker 4: talk past each other. When women are saying that like

983
00:51:03,320 --> 00:51:06,200
Speaker 4: they're attracted to maybe like a DJ called they're really

984
00:51:06,200 --> 00:51:10,000
Speaker 4: attracted to him. It's not that they're attracted him because

985
00:51:10,040 --> 00:51:14,080
Speaker 4: of the money. It's that the money makes him attractive. See,

986
00:51:14,120 --> 00:51:17,600
Speaker 4: And I think sometimes people get that confused. It's not like, hey,

987
00:51:18,000 --> 00:51:21,680
Speaker 4: I'm attracted to him because he's no the money and

988
00:51:21,719 --> 00:51:23,600
Speaker 4: the fact that he could do anything that he wants.

989
00:51:23,600 --> 00:51:25,640
Speaker 4: He lives a care free lifestyle, he can take care

990
00:51:25,640 --> 00:51:29,200
Speaker 4: of you, he's a provider, he's confident, all the things.

991
00:51:29,239 --> 00:51:32,640
Speaker 4: Sometimes that money makes you. For some people, not everyone,

992
00:51:33,160 --> 00:51:37,400
Speaker 4: that makes that person attractive. And for men it's just

993
00:51:38,080 --> 00:51:41,360
Speaker 4: very a lot of times. A lot of times, normally

994
00:51:41,400 --> 00:51:45,120
Speaker 4: when you're younger, it's very biological. But if you allow

995
00:51:45,200 --> 00:51:48,480
Speaker 4: yourself to be open, you know that as a man,

996
00:51:48,600 --> 00:51:52,560
Speaker 4: you need a companion. You need someone who can listen,

997
00:51:52,840 --> 00:51:56,919
Speaker 4: You need someone who you can nurture, who can nurture you,

998
00:51:56,920 --> 00:52:01,080
Speaker 4: You need someone who actually is a plus to your life.

999
00:52:01,800 --> 00:52:04,439
Speaker 4: A lot of these guys that's running around and still

1000
00:52:04,520 --> 00:52:08,000
Speaker 4: chasing after it after all of this time, it's because

1001
00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:12,560
Speaker 4: they're searching for something, and just because of the patriarchy

1002
00:52:12,600 --> 00:52:16,040
Speaker 4: that we live in, those guys can do more damage

1003
00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:19,799
Speaker 4: than women can. They can like they can, they can

1004
00:52:19,960 --> 00:52:23,719
Speaker 4: do more damage because the reality is if you were

1005
00:52:24,280 --> 00:52:27,200
Speaker 4: I don't know whoever you're puff like puff is day

1006
00:52:27,280 --> 00:52:29,080
Speaker 4: young Miami, shout out to Puff. That's my man. That

1007
00:52:29,120 --> 00:52:32,560
Speaker 4: girl's like twenty seven years old, right and he's and

1008
00:52:32,600 --> 00:52:35,480
Speaker 4: it's at this point in his life right now, it's

1009
00:52:35,680 --> 00:52:39,040
Speaker 4: never gonna be whack for Puff today. A twenty seven

1010
00:52:39,120 --> 00:52:42,120
Speaker 4: year old girl is never gonna be whack or guy

1011
00:52:42,320 --> 00:52:46,279
Speaker 4: like that. Why because that's just the way that that

1012
00:52:46,640 --> 00:52:48,600
Speaker 4: to me, it's not not saying I'm not saying that

1013
00:52:48,680 --> 00:52:50,839
Speaker 4: I'm looking at it that way. What I'm saying is

1014
00:52:51,480 --> 00:52:55,520
Speaker 4: just in the world, that's kind of a thing. Like

1015
00:52:55,840 --> 00:52:59,160
Speaker 4: he's rich, he's he can he can afford it, and

1016
00:52:59,160 --> 00:53:01,800
Speaker 4: people are gonna be like, and he still looks great.

1017
00:53:02,320 --> 00:53:04,080
Speaker 4: If you're a fifty two year old guy that works

1018
00:53:04,120 --> 00:53:06,319
Speaker 4: at the post office, you're a lot different than if

1019
00:53:06,320 --> 00:53:10,680
Speaker 4: you're a sewn kon sure for sure, for sure. Right. So,

1020
00:53:11,200 --> 00:53:14,640
Speaker 4: Like when I'm trying to this is what I want

1021
00:53:14,680 --> 00:53:16,400
Speaker 4: people to come to terms with. I want people to

1022
00:53:16,480 --> 00:53:18,800
Speaker 4: come to terms with what it is if they're attracted

1023
00:53:18,840 --> 00:53:22,680
Speaker 4: to if the reality is it's like, come to terms

1024
00:53:22,680 --> 00:53:25,080
Speaker 4: with it and just be okay with it. Everybody stop

1025
00:53:25,640 --> 00:53:28,680
Speaker 4: billyaching about what it is. Here's the thing we talked

1026
00:53:28,680 --> 00:53:33,640
Speaker 4: about future earlier. We are bullshitting We know why women

1027
00:53:33,719 --> 00:53:38,839
Speaker 4: are attracted to future. Future is good looking, Future is successful,

1028
00:53:39,200 --> 00:53:43,400
Speaker 4: Future is talented. Future has a bad boy aura that

1029
00:53:43,960 --> 00:53:48,960
Speaker 4: you guys did. We know why women are attracted to future.

1030
00:53:49,200 --> 00:53:51,200
Speaker 4: It is the same reason why women have been attracted

1031
00:53:51,239 --> 00:53:55,200
Speaker 4: to futures since the beginning of time. Right, we know

1032
00:53:55,360 --> 00:53:57,920
Speaker 4: why women are attracted to future. We get it, we

1033
00:53:58,080 --> 00:54:00,640
Speaker 4: understand it. Let's turn.

1034
00:54:01,120 --> 00:54:03,040
Speaker 1: Could you call him a funk away? What's wrong with him?

1035
00:54:03,239 --> 00:54:06,560
Speaker 4: Nothing? He What what I'm saying is, I don't think

1036
00:54:06,680 --> 00:54:08,560
Speaker 4: necessarily the future is a fun boy. I think he's

1037
00:54:08,600 --> 00:54:13,160
Speaker 4: the post life. So when I'm like, because he's got

1038
00:54:14,200 --> 00:54:16,960
Speaker 4: a lot of kids with a lot of different ladies, okay,

1039
00:54:17,640 --> 00:54:22,960
Speaker 4: and he does amazingly inappropriate things like that I'm good

1040
00:54:23,000 --> 00:54:26,080
Speaker 4: love and enjoy text and all of that stuff. So

1041
00:54:26,160 --> 00:54:28,839
Speaker 4: I think that I personally, I don't think that he's

1042
00:54:28,880 --> 00:54:32,480
Speaker 4: a bad dude. But I think that I think that

1043
00:54:32,560 --> 00:54:35,120
Speaker 4: if you if people were to put fun boy on

1044
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:37,080
Speaker 4: a deal and look at somebody, it would be future.

1045
00:54:37,160 --> 00:54:38,719
Speaker 4: And that's not to say that we haven't all been

1046
00:54:38,800 --> 00:54:42,600
Speaker 4: futures at one time, because we definitely have. But what

1047
00:54:42,640 --> 00:54:45,759
Speaker 4: I'm saying is that he is somebody who lives in

1048
00:54:45,800 --> 00:54:50,000
Speaker 4: it and embraces it. And if you were, if Russell

1049
00:54:50,040 --> 00:54:53,680
Speaker 4: Wilson would be the square, then future would definitely have

1050
00:54:53,760 --> 00:54:57,040
Speaker 4: to play the funck boy rout and so. And if

1051
00:54:57,040 --> 00:54:59,040
Speaker 4: a fun boy is somebody who just fucks you and

1052
00:54:59,080 --> 00:55:02,200
Speaker 4: it's not serious about it and do whatever or whatever,

1053
00:55:02,760 --> 00:55:05,280
Speaker 4: that's kind of who he would be. All I'm saying

1054
00:55:05,360 --> 00:55:12,120
Speaker 4: is that that's who he is, his persona. That's an aphrodisiact.

1055
00:55:12,400 --> 00:55:12,799
Speaker 4: You're right.

1056
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:15,080
Speaker 1: You know you're right, and by the way, you're right.

1057
00:55:15,239 --> 00:55:17,040
Speaker 1: And so when I and a lot of things that

1058
00:55:17,080 --> 00:55:19,000
Speaker 1: you're saying, I'm like, no, that's not true. But that's

1059
00:55:19,040 --> 00:55:21,680
Speaker 1: I'm referring to myself. And this is when you say

1060
00:55:21,880 --> 00:55:23,759
Speaker 1: I'm getting some jack and jail, I'm like you, that's

1061
00:55:23,800 --> 00:55:25,560
Speaker 1: so funny. I'm so damn hood. I'm glad you're getting

1062
00:55:25,600 --> 00:55:27,680
Speaker 1: jack and jail. I'm glad you think I'm refined, but

1063
00:55:28,600 --> 00:55:33,560
Speaker 1: it's not. It's But the reality is is what you're saying,

1064
00:55:33,640 --> 00:55:37,440
Speaker 1: is I hear you. You're correct, and where you grew up.

1065
00:55:37,480 --> 00:55:39,440
Speaker 1: Karisia's where the ship and there's nothing wrong with a

1066
00:55:39,520 --> 00:55:42,040
Speaker 1: Kreesha and a Diddy. That is the society in which

1067
00:55:42,040 --> 00:55:44,960
Speaker 1: we live in. And they are together and whatever that

1068
00:55:45,040 --> 00:55:49,399
Speaker 1: means right together, whatever that means right, because I mean,

1069
00:55:49,440 --> 00:55:52,759
Speaker 1: we know and and I felt like and it wasn't

1070
00:55:52,800 --> 00:55:53,719
Speaker 1: like it says it's coming off.

1071
00:55:54,680 --> 00:56:05,680
Speaker 5: What I say, what I do, Cary Gary, this is

1072
00:56:07,040 --> 00:56:09,200
Speaker 5: what did I what I say I did it?

1073
00:56:10,160 --> 00:56:13,560
Speaker 1: What are you talking about? My point being is is

1074
00:56:13,560 --> 00:56:16,760
Speaker 1: that we should not belly ache, and we should not complaining.

1075
00:56:16,800 --> 00:56:18,759
Speaker 1: We should be honest about what we're attracted to, and

1076
00:56:18,800 --> 00:56:22,080
Speaker 1: we should be unapologetic in that. You are correct, you are,

1077
00:56:22,200 --> 00:56:24,440
Speaker 1: You are okay. Thank you for therapy, Thank you for

1078
00:56:24,480 --> 00:56:27,839
Speaker 1: getting me all together. You got me all together. You're right.

1079
00:56:27,880 --> 00:56:29,880
Speaker 1: I need to be honest because if someone if I

1080
00:56:29,880 --> 00:56:31,600
Speaker 1: start saying what I'm attracted to do, somebody would be

1081
00:56:31,640 --> 00:56:34,440
Speaker 1: like you sound stupid, Like that's crazy, that's not realistic.

1082
00:56:34,520 --> 00:56:37,279
Speaker 1: That's not a real world, right if I or the

1083
00:56:37,320 --> 00:56:40,120
Speaker 1: men that I've dated, that's not realistic, that's not real world.

1084
00:56:40,160 --> 00:56:42,160
Speaker 1: I get it. So I understand what you're saying. One

1085
00:56:42,200 --> 00:56:46,560
Speaker 1: hundred can's your question? Oh, like serious, serious question.

1086
00:56:46,640 --> 00:56:52,160
Speaker 4: Like like power is attractive? Right, Like power is attraction

1087
00:56:52,200 --> 00:56:53,080
Speaker 4: one thousand percent.

1088
00:56:53,120 --> 00:56:55,560
Speaker 1: The way you described old girl liking Nick Saban was

1089
00:56:55,880 --> 00:56:56,600
Speaker 1: perfectly to it.

1090
00:56:56,960 --> 00:56:58,840
Speaker 4: And by the way, as a younger man. I couldn't

1091
00:56:58,880 --> 00:57:00,960
Speaker 4: understand it. I'm like, uh, you like him because he

1092
00:57:01,040 --> 00:57:03,759
Speaker 4: makes like at that time, we were getting them cheap.

1093
00:57:03,840 --> 00:57:05,600
Speaker 4: He makes three million dollars as the head coach of

1094
00:57:05,680 --> 00:57:07,719
Speaker 4: LSU football. That's why you like him. She's like, no,

1095
00:57:08,160 --> 00:57:10,200
Speaker 4: he's the most powerful man in the state. Like, that's

1096
00:57:10,200 --> 00:57:12,480
Speaker 4: why I like him. And I'm like, that's real and

1097
00:57:12,480 --> 00:57:17,000
Speaker 4: that's and I was telling him the people at like

1098
00:57:17,120 --> 00:57:19,120
Speaker 4: at TMZ this one time and I was like, uh,

1099
00:57:20,040 --> 00:57:21,680
Speaker 4: and this is a crude way to put this, so

1100
00:57:21,880 --> 00:57:25,200
Speaker 4: excuse all of everybody's ears. I was like, they were

1101
00:57:25,240 --> 00:57:27,320
Speaker 4: saying they were talking about some model, and they were like,

1102
00:57:27,360 --> 00:57:30,880
Speaker 4: she's with this, because a lot of times these Victoria's

1103
00:57:30,880 --> 00:57:33,560
Speaker 4: Secret Models, some of the Victoria Secret Models, you'll go

1104
00:57:33,600 --> 00:57:35,160
Speaker 4: and you'll never hear from them again, and then you'll

1105
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:38,440
Speaker 4: find out, oh, well, they're married to the head is

1106
00:57:38,640 --> 00:57:42,680
Speaker 4: Shipping Magnet or whatever billionaires. Yeah right, And so we're

1107
00:57:42,680 --> 00:57:44,920
Speaker 4: on So we're on the show and we're talking about this,

1108
00:57:45,200 --> 00:57:47,720
Speaker 4: like and you go, she married him for his money,

1109
00:57:47,720 --> 00:57:49,080
Speaker 4: and I was like, it depends on what you mean

1110
00:57:49,120 --> 00:57:51,400
Speaker 4: by that, and he goes what I was like, if

1111
00:57:51,480 --> 00:57:54,800
Speaker 4: you're saying that every night they go to bed, and

1112
00:57:54,840 --> 00:57:59,680
Speaker 4: she her skin crawls when he touches her and she grins,

1113
00:57:59,760 --> 00:58:04,160
Speaker 4: and of her entire life because of money. Then the

1114
00:58:04,200 --> 00:58:08,120
Speaker 4: way you're talking about it is wrong. What I'm telling

1115
00:58:08,160 --> 00:58:10,560
Speaker 4: you right now, what I believe is that he picks

1116
00:58:10,560 --> 00:58:12,920
Speaker 4: her up on a private jet. He takes her to

1117
00:58:12,960 --> 00:58:16,720
Speaker 4: the south of France. They chill, She sees him make

1118
00:58:16,880 --> 00:58:20,240
Speaker 4: a million business deals a day. She sees the way

1119
00:58:20,480 --> 00:58:25,840
Speaker 4: people react to him, and her pussy gets like legitimately

1120
00:58:25,640 --> 00:58:31,320
Speaker 4: like one like legitimately like she doesn't have to she

1121
00:58:31,400 --> 00:58:33,120
Speaker 4: have to like just have to bite down for it

1122
00:58:33,200 --> 00:58:37,080
Speaker 4: like it legitimately happens. And if that's the case, the

1123
00:58:37,200 --> 00:58:39,520
Speaker 4: money is just an attribute to who he was, I'm

1124
00:58:39,520 --> 00:58:41,400
Speaker 4: sure he could be like a terrible guy and turn

1125
00:58:41,440 --> 00:58:43,200
Speaker 4: her off. He's me and the dogs, me and the kids,

1126
00:58:43,440 --> 00:58:46,360
Speaker 4: and that would be one thing. But like beyond that,

1127
00:58:46,360 --> 00:58:48,680
Speaker 4: that's like a real thing. And so if that's a

1128
00:58:48,760 --> 00:58:53,160
Speaker 4: real thing, then being a trip to some chick that's

1129
00:58:53,200 --> 00:58:55,439
Speaker 4: like in Maxim magazine, it's kind of like the same

1130
00:58:55,480 --> 00:58:59,680
Speaker 4: thing she has biology. She has biologically the ship that

1131
00:58:59,800 --> 00:59:02,480
Speaker 4: you see that you like, your brain takes over and

1132
00:59:02,480 --> 00:59:05,200
Speaker 4: you go, I like her Massive magazine wouldn't be a magazine.

1133
00:59:05,400 --> 00:59:08,320
Speaker 1: That is the most honestly, I'm not being funny. That

1134
00:59:08,440 --> 00:59:11,960
Speaker 1: is probably the most fair way to describe what it is.

1135
00:59:12,760 --> 00:59:15,880
Speaker 1: And there's no excuse around it. And somebody like me

1136
00:59:15,920 --> 00:59:18,240
Speaker 1: who tries to be like a hibrow, You're right, A

1137
00:59:18,280 --> 00:59:21,160
Speaker 1: power is attractive. And I want to see somebody out

1138
00:59:21,160 --> 00:59:24,080
Speaker 1: there moving and making deals and ambitious because that's attractive.

1139
00:59:24,360 --> 00:59:26,640
Speaker 1: That is attractive. Somebody going out there to get it

1140
00:59:26,680 --> 00:59:29,640
Speaker 1: is attractive. I will add this caveat no one will

1141
00:59:29,640 --> 00:59:32,160
Speaker 1: believe it. You don't have to be a billionaire. You

1142
00:59:32,160 --> 00:59:34,560
Speaker 1: don't have to have a private jet. You don't have.

1143
00:59:34,680 --> 00:59:36,840
Speaker 1: But if I see you out here hustling and get it,

1144
00:59:36,880 --> 00:59:40,840
Speaker 1: and I see people you own a convenience store and

1145
00:59:40,880 --> 00:59:42,960
Speaker 1: your employees react to you in a certain way, I'm like,

1146
00:59:43,000 --> 00:59:46,440
Speaker 1: that's attractive. Like my point is is that it doesn't

1147
00:59:46,440 --> 00:59:51,080
Speaker 1: have to be at that magnitude. And oftentimes I think

1148
00:59:51,240 --> 00:59:54,960
Speaker 1: men can sometimes be delusional about this part of it, right,

1149
00:59:55,000 --> 00:59:57,480
Speaker 1: because it's all aesthetics for men, to be honest, like,

1150
00:59:57,480 --> 01:00:00,520
Speaker 1: because when you see in women too, women too, but

1151
01:00:00,560 --> 01:00:03,280
Speaker 1: a woman is more willing. A guy ain't gonna date

1152
01:00:03,360 --> 01:00:06,680
Speaker 1: a woman because she's powerful and people react to her

1153
01:00:06,720 --> 01:00:08,360
Speaker 1: a certain way. Some guys will because I think guys

1154
01:00:08,360 --> 01:00:10,920
Speaker 1: are groupies as well. But like if she got a belly,

1155
01:00:11,160 --> 01:00:13,680
Speaker 1: like a woman doesn't believe because she's successful she can

1156
01:00:13,720 --> 01:00:16,600
Speaker 1: be ageless because she's successful. She can have a belly

1157
01:00:16,880 --> 01:00:19,320
Speaker 1: because she's successful and the people react to her and

1158
01:00:19,320 --> 01:00:21,680
Speaker 1: she's famous that she can just be like, I'm just here.

1159
01:00:22,280 --> 01:00:27,320
Speaker 1: We don't believe that works in our favor, correct, Carrie.

1160
01:00:26,600 --> 01:00:29,080
Speaker 4: You're so right. I mean I don't think that I

1161
01:00:29,080 --> 01:00:31,840
Speaker 4: think you're right, but I got to be honest with you.

1162
01:00:32,600 --> 01:00:41,520
Speaker 4: This is, let me ask, is fascinating because I haven't

1163
01:00:41,800 --> 01:00:46,640
Speaker 4: because this is fascinating. It's fascinating because look, I remember

1164
01:00:46,640 --> 01:00:49,120
Speaker 4: the first time I met you. I'm like, oh shit,

1165
01:00:49,240 --> 01:00:51,840
Speaker 4: that's like Carrie Champion, Like I wake up. I watch

1166
01:00:51,880 --> 01:00:55,280
Speaker 4: fucking sports centers carry Champion, Like the whole fucking time

1167
01:00:55,920 --> 01:01:00,480
Speaker 4: is like you're in so many we It's like I

1168
01:01:00,560 --> 01:01:03,880
Speaker 4: don't know when somebody's at ESPN, you don't get a

1169
01:01:03,960 --> 01:01:08,480
Speaker 4: chance to like really talk to them, like get their worldview.

1170
01:01:09,080 --> 01:01:12,080
Speaker 4: And this is this is fascinating to hear.

1171
01:01:12,520 --> 01:01:14,320
Speaker 1: Why is it fascinating to you?

1172
01:01:14,720 --> 01:01:19,160
Speaker 4: Because I wouldn't think that I would think that we

1173
01:01:19,200 --> 01:01:21,320
Speaker 4: would talk about the seventy six ers or something like that.

1174
01:01:21,360 --> 01:01:26,360
Speaker 1: I don't know, can I say something? Can I say something?

1175
01:01:26,920 --> 01:01:30,120
Speaker 1: So I've been thinking about doing a podcast about relationships,

1176
01:01:30,560 --> 01:01:34,320
Speaker 1: and I will say this. I've been looking for a

1177
01:01:34,400 --> 01:01:36,560
Speaker 1: counterpart who will go tell total total me because I

1178
01:01:36,600 --> 01:01:39,240
Speaker 1: feel like, and I will say this caveat if someone's listening,

1179
01:01:39,400 --> 01:01:42,240
Speaker 1: I'm dating. I'm happy, I'm in a really good relationship,

1180
01:01:42,640 --> 01:01:44,880
Speaker 1: but I do feel like there are so many of

1181
01:01:44,880 --> 01:01:47,480
Speaker 1: my friends who are going through this battle every single day.

1182
01:01:47,520 --> 01:01:49,640
Speaker 1: And then of course I'm around a bunch of athletes

1183
01:01:49,640 --> 01:01:53,520
Speaker 1: and that they like and that they do. It's so ridiculous.

1184
01:01:53,520 --> 01:01:55,720
Speaker 1: And in my mom I'm like, are you really you're

1185
01:01:55,720 --> 01:01:58,000
Speaker 1: about to have ten babies? You're about to have ten

1186
01:01:58,080 --> 01:01:59,360
Speaker 1: babies with three different women?

1187
01:02:00,120 --> 01:02:02,439
Speaker 4: Or it's just like I employ you to not count them,

1188
01:02:02,640 --> 01:02:06,080
Speaker 4: because that's such a that's such an unrealistic view of

1189
01:02:06,120 --> 01:02:10,640
Speaker 4: how it happens. Like those guys are those guys are

1190
01:02:11,080 --> 01:02:15,720
Speaker 4: little unicorns that throughout their whole life have been told

1191
01:02:16,320 --> 01:02:19,720
Speaker 4: that they're special and because they are right, It's like,

1192
01:02:19,960 --> 01:02:23,800
Speaker 4: you can't like those I understand that because like and

1193
01:02:23,800 --> 01:02:26,440
Speaker 4: and l A will do that, LA will do that

1194
01:02:26,480 --> 01:02:28,720
Speaker 4: to you as well, because you're in when I'm in

1195
01:02:28,800 --> 01:02:30,880
Speaker 4: bad and ruge, right, we all going to the club.

1196
01:02:30,960 --> 01:02:32,960
Speaker 4: We all go in there, we dance till we sweaty.

1197
01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:35,520
Speaker 4: We come out of the club dripping red, wet and sweat.

1198
01:02:35,680 --> 01:02:37,680
Speaker 4: You go into you going to a club in La

1199
01:02:37,840 --> 01:02:41,200
Speaker 4: You look around and it's like, Yo, it's really rich

1200
01:02:41,280 --> 01:02:44,640
Speaker 4: niggas in here, Like it's like they are really rich,

1201
01:02:45,000 --> 01:02:47,120
Speaker 4: Like they're not playing these are These are not the

1202
01:02:47,160 --> 01:02:49,880
Speaker 4: dope dealers off your block or the guys that are

1203
01:02:49,960 --> 01:02:53,080
Speaker 4: the and where I'm from, the dudes that promoted the

1204
01:02:53,120 --> 01:02:55,680
Speaker 4: parties were the dudes that had the most money. To

1205
01:02:55,720 --> 01:02:59,400
Speaker 4: be honest with you, you know what I mean. But here,

1206
01:03:00,440 --> 01:03:03,600
Speaker 4: especially back like before, Like I walk in the club

1207
01:03:03,600 --> 01:03:06,480
Speaker 4: and see fucking Kevin Durant there. You you start to

1208
01:03:06,480 --> 01:03:08,640
Speaker 4: think to yourself, well, what the fuck am I supposed

1209
01:03:08,640 --> 01:03:11,200
Speaker 4: to do? You know, like in the whole days you

1210
01:03:11,200 --> 01:03:13,439
Speaker 4: saw to think you're right. You started to think to yourself, well,

1211
01:03:14,080 --> 01:03:15,919
Speaker 4: what the hell was going on in you? I first

1212
01:03:16,000 --> 01:03:17,800
Speaker 4: got when I first got to l A. The first

1213
01:03:17,880 --> 01:03:21,600
Speaker 4: couple of years I was out here, like I look

1214
01:03:21,640 --> 01:03:25,560
Speaker 4: and I see god damn fucking Leonard Dicaprios like at

1215
01:03:26,120 --> 01:03:29,920
Speaker 4: the skybar, like and it's like a line. It's like

1216
01:03:29,960 --> 01:03:32,520
Speaker 4: a line, like a photo booth to meet him.

1217
01:03:32,840 --> 01:03:34,720
Speaker 1: So you're talking about somebody who grew up here. So

1218
01:03:34,800 --> 01:03:37,640
Speaker 1: if I see George Clooney at Starbucks, I'm like, that's

1219
01:03:37,640 --> 01:03:40,000
Speaker 1: really George Clooney at Starbucks. Like in college, I know

1220
01:03:40,120 --> 01:03:40,560
Speaker 1: there's church.

1221
01:03:40,600 --> 01:03:44,080
Speaker 4: Clear that's different. That's different for me. And so but

1222
01:03:44,200 --> 01:03:47,960
Speaker 4: like I when I go back home, sometimes black people

1223
01:03:48,080 --> 01:03:52,120
Speaker 4: just meet fucking get married. It's just that's it. Sometimes

1224
01:03:52,120 --> 01:03:53,520
Speaker 4: they just mean it's much more.

1225
01:03:53,360 --> 01:03:57,160
Speaker 1: Simple, it's much more easy. Yeah, And you're that's what

1226
01:03:57,320 --> 01:03:59,240
Speaker 1: That's what I started off when I talked about your book.

1227
01:03:59,240 --> 01:04:01,360
Speaker 1: I was like, your mentality is very different, even though

1228
01:04:01,560 --> 01:04:04,560
Speaker 1: you've been indoctrinated into this Hollywood world, your mentality is

1229
01:04:04,640 --> 01:04:05,920
Speaker 1: very different, very different different.

1230
01:04:06,080 --> 01:04:08,840
Speaker 2: Every champion and carry Champion is to be a champion

1231
01:04:08,880 --> 01:04:11,520
Speaker 2: out of champion and carry Chappie and and carry Chappy

1232
01:04:11,600 --> 01:04:14,840
Speaker 2: out a champion and carry Chappie and and carry Chaffrad

1233
01:04:14,920 --> 01:04:19,360
Speaker 2: is his sports and entertainment can naked word. Harry Champion

1234
01:04:19,400 --> 01:04:22,120
Speaker 2: and Carrie Chappie is to be a champion outa champion

1235
01:04:22,200 --> 01:04:24,880
Speaker 2: and Carrie Chappie and the girl play got a champion

1236
01:04:24,960 --> 01:04:29,520
Speaker 2: and carry chappion and carried Sheppy entertainment, can nacke working?

1237
01:04:30,080 --> 01:04:31,720
Speaker 1: I have to say this, Okay, so this is I

1238
01:04:31,800 --> 01:04:33,240
Speaker 1: know you thought I was going to talk about sports,

1239
01:04:33,560 --> 01:04:35,680
Speaker 1: but I have been a fan since TMZ and people

1240
01:04:35,760 --> 01:04:38,920
Speaker 1: often ask you about that moment when you left or

1241
01:04:38,960 --> 01:04:41,040
Speaker 1: when you know, when you I don't know, the y'all

1242
01:04:41,240 --> 01:04:43,320
Speaker 1: y'all broke up. Yeah yeah, I was like, I don't

1243
01:04:43,320 --> 01:04:45,960
Speaker 1: know if I did. You have to say that, yeah, yeah,

1244
01:04:45,960 --> 01:04:48,960
Speaker 1: it's fine. So you get fired. And the first thing

1245
01:04:49,000 --> 01:04:51,200
Speaker 1: I thought was, what a horrible What a horrible loss

1246
01:04:51,240 --> 01:04:54,439
Speaker 1: for TMZ. What a horrible loss for TMZ, But also

1247
01:04:54,560 --> 01:04:56,880
Speaker 1: what a wonderful opportunity for him to make his way

1248
01:04:57,360 --> 01:05:00,240
Speaker 1: and to use his platform to share his message because

1249
01:05:00,240 --> 01:05:02,000
Speaker 1: they kind of got in the way. If I'm being honest,

1250
01:05:02,200 --> 01:05:04,560
Speaker 1: you don't necessarily need that type of platform to tell

1251
01:05:04,640 --> 01:05:07,000
Speaker 1: to give your message. And I've watched you and I

1252
01:05:07,080 --> 01:05:09,120
Speaker 1: don't say anything, but I quietly watch you, and I

1253
01:05:09,200 --> 01:05:12,640
Speaker 1: think he's doing it, and I love it because you're

1254
01:05:12,760 --> 01:05:16,120
Speaker 1: in spite of did you ever think that you would

1255
01:05:16,160 --> 01:05:18,600
Speaker 1: be at a point in your career where your opinion mattered,

1256
01:05:18,600 --> 01:05:20,600
Speaker 1: where people would wake up and look to see what

1257
01:05:20,680 --> 01:05:23,240
Speaker 1: you're tweeting or saying or what your podcast is saying.

1258
01:05:23,360 --> 01:05:25,680
Speaker 1: And I'm saying this from someone who hear the woman

1259
01:05:25,680 --> 01:05:27,280
Speaker 1: who does my makeup, she's like, I was listening to Van.

1260
01:05:27,400 --> 01:05:29,280
Speaker 1: I'm like, if you keep telling me about a van

1261
01:05:29,760 --> 01:05:33,160
Speaker 1: like Van said this today and it's gospel for her.

1262
01:05:33,640 --> 01:05:36,640
Speaker 1: My best friend who who loved your book, who battles

1263
01:05:36,680 --> 01:05:40,080
Speaker 1: with her weight, Oh, it's this gospel for me. Did

1264
01:05:40,160 --> 01:05:41,960
Speaker 1: you ever think that you would be in this position

1265
01:05:43,040 --> 01:05:45,720
Speaker 1: from when you left TMZ or when you got fire

1266
01:05:45,760 --> 01:05:47,760
Speaker 1: from TMZ to where we are now? Do you ever

1267
01:05:48,040 --> 01:05:49,520
Speaker 1: feel like this was the vision?

1268
01:05:49,800 --> 01:05:54,640
Speaker 4: No? Not really, because I think that that when I

1269
01:05:54,760 --> 01:05:56,760
Speaker 4: speak and I say stuff, it feels like stuff that

1270
01:05:56,800 --> 01:05:59,120
Speaker 4: I have to say, Like I was one of those

1271
01:05:59,120 --> 01:06:02,040
Speaker 4: people that would just be I remember it being in

1272
01:06:02,120 --> 01:06:04,760
Speaker 4: the sixth grade and his politician came to UH to

1273
01:06:04,880 --> 01:06:07,600
Speaker 4: our school and he's talking. I just remember sitting there arrested,

1274
01:06:07,720 --> 01:06:09,800
Speaker 4: like I have to be able to say something. I

1275
01:06:09,960 --> 01:06:12,160
Speaker 4: have to say. I have to say Something's almost like

1276
01:06:12,160 --> 01:06:15,080
Speaker 4: an anxiety like or response. I have to say something.

1277
01:06:15,400 --> 01:06:18,000
Speaker 4: And so I never really thought that it would be

1278
01:06:18,080 --> 01:06:20,560
Speaker 4: And I think most people that like Charlotte is like

1279
01:06:20,600 --> 01:06:22,840
Speaker 4: that Charlamaye, just like he'll call you up and rant

1280
01:06:22,880 --> 01:06:26,960
Speaker 4: for like two hours because he'd be high, like over

1281
01:06:27,080 --> 01:06:29,520
Speaker 4: something like He'll he'll call you up and rant for

1282
01:06:29,640 --> 01:06:32,320
Speaker 4: like two hours because he really has shit he has

1283
01:06:32,360 --> 01:06:35,200
Speaker 4: to get off his chest, and he like has a

1284
01:06:35,280 --> 01:06:37,040
Speaker 4: platform to do it. So I never really thought that.

1285
01:06:37,280 --> 01:06:39,600
Speaker 4: And to be honest with you, being at TMZ for

1286
01:06:39,720 --> 01:06:43,080
Speaker 4: as long as I was, it was like it was like,

1287
01:06:43,200 --> 01:06:46,320
Speaker 4: for a time I thought that the reputation of the

1288
01:06:46,560 --> 01:06:49,120
Speaker 4: of the platform would be an albatross around my neck

1289
01:06:49,160 --> 01:06:50,640
Speaker 4: that I would never be able to shake free up.

1290
01:06:51,200 --> 01:06:56,400
Speaker 4: And if it's if anything, that is the divine work

1291
01:06:56,520 --> 01:06:58,400
Speaker 4: of the Kanye West moment, the divine work of the

1292
01:06:58,480 --> 01:07:03,800
Speaker 4: Kanye West moment. It was almost like God saying to me,

1293
01:07:04,440 --> 01:07:06,919
Speaker 4: I'm going to give you an opportunity to show people

1294
01:07:06,960 --> 01:07:09,080
Speaker 4: who you really are, whether or not you take it

1295
01:07:09,160 --> 01:07:11,280
Speaker 4: as on you like, I'm going to give you an opportunity.

1296
01:07:11,720 --> 01:07:13,960
Speaker 4: Even beyond all of this other stuff. I had great

1297
01:07:14,000 --> 01:07:15,840
Speaker 4: relationships with people. I was able to meet up a

1298
01:07:15,960 --> 01:07:18,800
Speaker 4: bunch of people. Most people that watched the show like me,

1299
01:07:18,960 --> 01:07:21,440
Speaker 4: I was the mand there already. But it was like

1300
01:07:22,480 --> 01:07:24,280
Speaker 4: like with him walking in there, it was like, I'm

1301
01:07:24,320 --> 01:07:27,560
Speaker 4: going to give you one moment to show people who

1302
01:07:27,680 --> 01:07:31,600
Speaker 4: you really are, and that can get you, that can

1303
01:07:31,760 --> 01:07:35,280
Speaker 4: change the perception of you. And I think it was

1304
01:07:36,080 --> 01:07:38,400
Speaker 4: luck that it happened that way, But I also think

1305
01:07:38,440 --> 01:07:42,920
Speaker 4: it was divine timing that I met the moment. So

1306
01:07:43,040 --> 01:07:47,680
Speaker 4: that's why, like, no matter what happens, it's like, well,

1307
01:07:47,800 --> 01:07:52,280
Speaker 4: as much work as you've done in your career, I

1308
01:07:52,440 --> 01:07:54,680
Speaker 4: bet that there's a part of you that believes that

1309
01:07:54,880 --> 01:07:58,720
Speaker 4: being prepared for whatever opportunity might come to you is

1310
01:07:58,840 --> 01:08:01,919
Speaker 4: probably the most important thing. Like, at some point you're

1311
01:08:01,960 --> 01:08:04,640
Speaker 4: gonna get that shot. The point is whether or not

1312
01:08:04,760 --> 01:08:07,120
Speaker 4: you're prepared. I would show up to work every day.

1313
01:08:07,680 --> 01:08:09,640
Speaker 4: I would work the holidays at TMZ to get more

1314
01:08:09,720 --> 01:08:12,720
Speaker 4: camera time. Whatever I could do to stretch my legs

1315
01:08:12,800 --> 01:08:15,120
Speaker 4: there to make me a fixuer there, I would so

1316
01:08:15,160 --> 01:08:17,000
Speaker 4: by the time something like that happens, I'm ready for me.

1317
01:08:19,120 --> 01:08:19,479
Speaker 5: Did you.

1318
01:08:21,040 --> 01:08:22,960
Speaker 1: Do you think you're a celebrity now?

1319
01:08:25,200 --> 01:08:30,479
Speaker 4: Yes. I think I think I'm people's homeboy. I think

1320
01:08:30,520 --> 01:08:32,760
Speaker 4: I'm a I think I'm a popular friend. I think

1321
01:08:32,800 --> 01:08:36,320
Speaker 4: Brad Pitt is a celebrity. I think I think when people,

1322
01:08:36,439 --> 01:08:39,160
Speaker 4: when people, when people come up to me, They're like

1323
01:08:39,520 --> 01:08:43,000
Speaker 4: they want to talk. I think that's amazing, Like they

1324
01:08:43,200 --> 01:08:46,400
Speaker 4: want to talk. Like people respond to me from the

1325
01:08:46,439 --> 01:08:49,280
Speaker 4: stuff that I do on the Ringer from the podcast

1326
01:08:49,320 --> 01:08:51,639
Speaker 4: Apache no matter what I'm talking about, whether its Star Wars, whatever,

1327
01:08:51,720 --> 01:08:53,920
Speaker 4: they want to have a conversation with me. They want

1328
01:08:54,000 --> 01:08:58,080
Speaker 4: to engage with me. I think being a celebrity is vastly,

1329
01:08:58,439 --> 01:09:00,960
Speaker 4: vastly overrated, and I think at my time at TMC

1330
01:09:01,280 --> 01:09:07,240
Speaker 4: has driven that home more than anything. I think they

1331
01:09:07,280 --> 01:09:10,320
Speaker 4: are celebrities and then they're there are contributors, and then

1332
01:09:10,320 --> 01:09:14,960
Speaker 4: there are artists. And I'm a contributor right now, but

1333
01:09:15,000 --> 01:09:16,200
Speaker 4: I'm hoping to be an artist.

1334
01:09:18,720 --> 01:09:20,440
Speaker 1: Have you been affected by Hollywood?

1335
01:09:20,600 --> 01:09:25,080
Speaker 4: Sure? I went through a time where I thought I

1336
01:09:25,200 --> 01:09:28,040
Speaker 4: was the man. How could you not? You know? I

1337
01:09:28,880 --> 01:09:31,400
Speaker 4: went through a ten year period of like hiding myself

1338
01:09:31,439 --> 01:09:35,400
Speaker 4: and making sure that nobody saw me, to making sure

1339
01:09:35,400 --> 01:09:37,640
Speaker 4: that everyone saw me because whenever somebody saw me, they

1340
01:09:37,680 --> 01:09:39,680
Speaker 4: had a big smile and a pat on the back

1341
01:09:39,720 --> 01:09:45,360
Speaker 4: for me. So I think, uh, it's super difficult to

1342
01:09:45,479 --> 01:09:48,120
Speaker 4: not lose yourself. And there's and there's a there's mirrored

1343
01:09:48,160 --> 01:09:53,880
Speaker 4: ways that it happens. Right, It's like when when the thing.

1344
01:09:53,920 --> 01:09:57,519
Speaker 4: When ya first happened, I went, I made it very

1345
01:09:58,560 --> 01:10:01,519
Speaker 4: I made a very deliberate point the next day to

1346
01:10:01,680 --> 01:10:05,000
Speaker 4: go on Instagram and make sure that I directed people

1347
01:10:05,280 --> 01:10:09,439
Speaker 4: to Jason Wilson in a cave of adubum in Detroit

1348
01:10:09,720 --> 01:10:11,240
Speaker 4: and what they're doing for the kids up there, just

1349
01:10:11,280 --> 01:10:13,479
Speaker 4: to make sure that I use it for something good. Now,

1350
01:10:13,520 --> 01:10:17,439
Speaker 4: what happened over the course of the next x a

1351
01:10:17,520 --> 01:10:20,439
Speaker 4: couple of months or whatever was that people would send

1352
01:10:20,520 --> 01:10:23,360
Speaker 4: me different videos, send me videos of black people being

1353
01:10:23,400 --> 01:10:27,160
Speaker 4: beat up on buses of all types of different things

1354
01:10:27,200 --> 01:10:29,519
Speaker 4: like that, and like, yo, post this, post this, like

1355
01:10:29,680 --> 01:10:31,240
Speaker 4: have you seen what happened? Blah blah blah. Because I

1356
01:10:31,320 --> 01:10:34,240
Speaker 4: became like an advocate, like a warrior, right, And the

1357
01:10:34,360 --> 01:10:38,759
Speaker 4: reality is is that that's like not me. Like talking

1358
01:10:38,840 --> 01:10:41,720
Speaker 4: about the conditions of black people is something inherent to me.

1359
01:10:42,120 --> 01:10:44,040
Speaker 4: But triggering black people every day and this is not

1360
01:10:44,160 --> 01:10:46,680
Speaker 4: me coming to anybody who does this, because people have

1361
01:10:46,800 --> 01:10:49,599
Speaker 4: to know what's going on, triggering black people every day,

1362
01:10:49,640 --> 01:10:52,439
Speaker 4: and triggering myself by images of black people getting fucked

1363
01:10:52,479 --> 01:10:55,280
Speaker 4: over being by the police, be it at the waffle house,

1364
01:10:55,720 --> 01:10:57,720
Speaker 4: be it at wherever. It's not who I am. I

1365
01:10:57,840 --> 01:11:00,200
Speaker 4: wasn't doing that before, so why would I do it now?

1366
01:11:00,640 --> 01:11:02,479
Speaker 4: When you go to my uh, when you go to

1367
01:11:02,560 --> 01:11:07,960
Speaker 4: my Instagram, you're gonna see like the whole canvas, the

1368
01:11:08,000 --> 01:11:11,400
Speaker 4: whole painting of who I am. Funny shit, dumb shit.

1369
01:11:12,040 --> 01:11:14,360
Speaker 4: You're gonna see some things that I feel like the

1370
01:11:14,400 --> 01:11:16,960
Speaker 4: community should be aware of me. And you're gonna see

1371
01:11:17,000 --> 01:11:18,920
Speaker 4: some things that are that are caused my personal but

1372
01:11:19,080 --> 01:11:22,760
Speaker 4: all away from like my personal life, you know what

1373
01:11:22,800 --> 01:11:26,840
Speaker 4: I mean. And so I decided that rather than do

1374
01:11:27,000 --> 01:11:29,040
Speaker 4: that and try to get to a million, a million

1375
01:11:29,040 --> 01:11:31,479
Speaker 4: and a half two million followers by putting things on

1376
01:11:31,600 --> 01:11:34,320
Speaker 4: there that would trigger people over and over and over again,

1377
01:11:34,360 --> 01:11:36,200
Speaker 4: that I was just gonna be me. I was just

1378
01:11:36,280 --> 01:11:38,679
Speaker 4: gonna be me. Some of the ship was gonna be stupid,

1379
01:11:39,080 --> 01:11:41,920
Speaker 4: some of the ship was going to be uh, gonna

1380
01:11:41,960 --> 01:11:43,240
Speaker 4: have some outreach to it, and some of it was

1381
01:11:43,280 --> 01:11:45,080
Speaker 4: gonna be challenging and wrong. But I'm just going to

1382
01:11:45,160 --> 01:11:47,960
Speaker 4: be me. And I think the hardest thing to do

1383
01:11:48,560 --> 01:11:52,960
Speaker 4: once you've received any sort of notoriety at all. That's

1384
01:11:53,040 --> 01:11:58,080
Speaker 4: even if you just on TMZ in La when you

1385
01:11:58,200 --> 01:11:59,960
Speaker 4: move to La, because the people I know from La,

1386
01:12:00,080 --> 01:12:02,080
Speaker 4: I keep telling people this. People I know from LA

1387
01:12:02,200 --> 01:12:05,360
Speaker 4: are super duper real. They're the realest people. The people

1388
01:12:05,439 --> 01:12:07,280
Speaker 4: I know from LA, they're real. Yeah, you see what

1389
01:12:07,320 --> 01:12:09,360
Speaker 4: I'm saying. People say LA is face. It's like, Nah,

1390
01:12:09,439 --> 01:12:11,640
Speaker 4: y'all came out here to be the prom king and

1391
01:12:12,920 --> 01:12:15,439
Speaker 4: you guys are in Hollywood. You're really not even talking

1392
01:12:15,439 --> 01:12:18,760
Speaker 4: about LA. You're talking about between Santa Monica and fucking out.

1393
01:12:21,000 --> 01:12:21,599
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.

1394
01:12:21,960 --> 01:12:24,200
Speaker 1: By the way you for you to say that it

1395
01:12:24,240 --> 01:12:25,840
Speaker 1: is such bad I say that, so you come here.

1396
01:12:25,920 --> 01:12:27,720
Speaker 1: The people from LA are as honest as they get it.

1397
01:12:27,920 --> 01:12:30,200
Speaker 1: I love you for being like I'm getting jacked. I'm like, no,

1398
01:12:30,280 --> 01:12:31,840
Speaker 1: I'm just being like, this is what I feel like.

1399
01:12:31,960 --> 01:12:33,640
Speaker 1: I don't know any other way to be.

1400
01:12:33,880 --> 01:12:37,000
Speaker 4: Like I was trying to say, to really be honest

1401
01:12:37,040 --> 01:12:39,559
Speaker 4: with you. It's like I was trying to say to you, Damn, Carrie,

1402
01:12:39,600 --> 01:12:41,519
Speaker 4: I didn't know you kept it this gangster. That's why

1403
01:12:41,520 --> 01:12:43,960
Speaker 4: I was trying to That's all I was trying to say.

1404
01:12:44,080 --> 01:12:46,080
Speaker 4: But no, I guess my point is, And so when

1405
01:12:46,080 --> 01:12:48,880
Speaker 4: you come out here and it starts to happen, it's

1406
01:12:49,120 --> 01:12:52,120
Speaker 4: the most important thing to do. It's just man, stay

1407
01:12:52,160 --> 01:12:55,719
Speaker 4: the course of who you are correct, like, just stay

1408
01:12:55,800 --> 01:12:58,400
Speaker 4: the course of who you are. And because it's different,

1409
01:12:58,479 --> 01:13:01,080
Speaker 4: everybody looks at you different, Like you're playing and you're

1410
01:13:01,120 --> 01:13:03,360
Speaker 4: playing basketball in the gym after you've been here for

1411
01:13:03,439 --> 01:13:06,160
Speaker 4: a while, you're playing basketball for at the gym, and

1412
01:13:06,240 --> 01:13:08,519
Speaker 4: you see one of your homies in a commercial and

1413
01:13:08,840 --> 01:13:11,840
Speaker 4: oh shit, he got that commercial. And it's this weird

1414
01:13:12,040 --> 01:13:15,280
Speaker 4: little pecking order that starts to exist everywhere, and once

1415
01:13:15,320 --> 01:13:18,360
Speaker 4: you get on television, it really starts to comfort you.

1416
01:13:18,400 --> 01:13:20,320
Speaker 4: People like, oh, well, you must be doing You're on

1417
01:13:20,400 --> 01:13:22,680
Speaker 4: teams every day, so you must be doing something right,

1418
01:13:23,320 --> 01:13:25,160
Speaker 4: so now I'll let me. So it's just weird. And

1419
01:13:25,280 --> 01:13:27,720
Speaker 4: so sometimes you can lose yourself in it and I

1420
01:13:27,840 --> 01:13:29,760
Speaker 4: try not to, but I did for a little while, my.

1421
01:13:29,800 --> 01:13:32,040
Speaker 1: Heart, you did for a little while. And by the way,

1422
01:13:32,120 --> 01:13:34,120
Speaker 1: that's an honest I ask you that I don't and

1423
01:13:34,240 --> 01:13:36,400
Speaker 1: I wouldn't know. I wouldn't know outside looking in. But

1424
01:13:36,520 --> 01:13:38,640
Speaker 1: it can happen, and it does happen. It's a it's

1425
01:13:38,680 --> 01:13:43,080
Speaker 1: a real thing. You And then and also too, you

1426
01:13:43,160 --> 01:13:45,280
Speaker 1: start to lose patience with a lot of things, like

1427
01:13:45,360 --> 01:13:47,320
Speaker 1: you start to demand or expect a lot of things

1428
01:13:47,400 --> 01:13:49,639
Speaker 1: that you normally wouldn't demand. Or expect.

1429
01:13:50,000 --> 01:13:52,360
Speaker 4: Sure, I we just we.

1430
01:13:52,439 --> 01:13:55,360
Speaker 1: Treat people differently, we act differently, we want differently, We

1431
01:13:55,520 --> 01:13:59,040
Speaker 1: just we just behave differently. And that's okay, and nothing

1432
01:13:59,160 --> 01:14:00,880
Speaker 1: is wrong with that. I don't want that to ever

1433
01:14:01,160 --> 01:14:04,160
Speaker 1: to be a slight. But I am fascinated when you

1434
01:14:04,320 --> 01:14:07,280
Speaker 1: use that word fascinated. I am fascinated by your trajectory.

1435
01:14:07,640 --> 01:14:10,720
Speaker 1: And I also am fascinated by how you chose to

1436
01:14:12,040 --> 01:14:14,360
Speaker 1: do it your way, like you're still out here doing

1437
01:14:14,479 --> 01:14:17,080
Speaker 1: it all. So then you get you get involved with

1438
01:14:17,160 --> 01:14:23,719
Speaker 1: this project which ultimately manifests into an Oscar an Academy Award,

1439
01:14:25,400 --> 01:14:28,160
Speaker 1: And I remember you posting something and I'm thinking, wow,

1440
01:14:28,200 --> 01:14:31,760
Speaker 1: what a powerful moment. Just wow, just wow, Like I

1441
01:14:31,840 --> 01:14:35,400
Speaker 1: think maybe even our our mutual friend did Bozma posts

1442
01:14:35,439 --> 01:14:37,559
Speaker 1: about a text that you guys had had Texas change,

1443
01:14:37,560 --> 01:14:40,880
Speaker 1: You had Posema Saint John shout out to my bestie,

1444
01:14:41,479 --> 01:14:45,880
Speaker 1: and I thought that was really powerful too. Talk to

1445
01:14:46,000 --> 01:14:48,400
Speaker 1: me about the moment that you won the Oscar, How

1446
01:14:48,479 --> 01:14:50,519
Speaker 1: it all came to be the project.

1447
01:14:50,600 --> 01:14:55,160
Speaker 4: That's so Treyvonfrey, like Nick May six feet over Productions,

1448
01:14:55,240 --> 01:15:00,280
Speaker 4: we are. It's let's say it's late twenty nineteen, early

1449
01:15:00,360 --> 01:15:04,000
Speaker 4: twenty twenty We're meeting at Lawrence Bender's house. Treyvon was

1450
01:15:04,000 --> 01:15:06,600
Speaker 4: living at Laura Lawrence Bender's house at this time. So

1451
01:15:06,680 --> 01:15:09,559
Speaker 4: we're meeting at Lawrence Bender's house and we're talking about

1452
01:15:09,640 --> 01:15:12,720
Speaker 4: what we're going to do, Like we're gonna start a

1453
01:15:12,720 --> 01:15:14,920
Speaker 4: production company and we're gonna make We're gonna make a

1454
01:15:15,000 --> 01:15:16,760
Speaker 4: movie or a television show. Where are we gonna sell

1455
01:15:16,800 --> 01:15:19,400
Speaker 4: we're gonna do? So it's pre pandemics that we would

1456
01:15:19,439 --> 01:15:22,559
Speaker 4: go there and we would sit down and we would

1457
01:15:22,600 --> 01:15:23,439
Speaker 4: discuss this stuff.

1458
01:15:23,840 --> 01:15:23,960
Speaker 5: Uh.

1459
01:15:24,479 --> 01:15:27,559
Speaker 4: Nick, Me and Nick had started to work work working together.

1460
01:15:27,640 --> 01:15:30,280
Speaker 4: We had come on as executive producers on another movie

1461
01:15:30,400 --> 01:15:33,960
Speaker 4: called Uppity. Uh. That was about Willie t Ribbs, the

1462
01:15:34,120 --> 01:15:37,840
Speaker 4: first black stock car driver. At the end five hundred.

1463
01:15:38,920 --> 01:15:41,160
Speaker 4: Nick had helped me his Avery Duverne is his sister.

1464
01:15:41,240 --> 01:15:43,080
Speaker 4: He had helped me get aprim My podcast with me

1465
01:15:43,080 --> 01:15:45,839
Speaker 4: and Nick. We were working together. I met Nick through Charlotte.

1466
01:15:46,400 --> 01:15:50,400
Speaker 4: So we're talking about all of this stuff. We're getting

1467
01:15:50,439 --> 01:15:51,880
Speaker 4: ideas together. What are we gonna do, What are we

1468
01:15:51,880 --> 01:15:55,719
Speaker 4: gonna do, where we're gonna do. The pandemic comes. Bendemic comes,

1469
01:15:56,120 --> 01:15:58,960
Speaker 4: and obviously there are no meetings, there's no getting together

1470
01:15:59,040 --> 01:16:02,000
Speaker 4: at Lawrence's house, everybody stops, all of our hair grows out,

1471
01:16:02,080 --> 01:16:12,920
Speaker 4: We look terrible. It is about i'd say four months,

1472
01:16:13,000 --> 01:16:18,400
Speaker 4: so that starts in March. Maybe it's like it's July

1473
01:16:19,680 --> 01:16:22,840
Speaker 4: or June before we all get back together. We get there,

1474
01:16:22,920 --> 01:16:25,879
Speaker 4: we're social distancing, you know. And by this point, everybody

1475
01:16:26,000 --> 01:16:28,360
Speaker 4: that's around that weird point where everyone realized that the

1476
01:16:28,439 --> 01:16:31,880
Speaker 4: pandemic wasn't going anywhere, but everything still wasn't open again.

1477
01:16:32,320 --> 01:16:34,280
Speaker 4: We were still seeing each other moving around, trying to

1478
01:16:34,320 --> 01:16:36,479
Speaker 4: go to dinner outside and all of that stuff. And

1479
01:16:38,080 --> 01:16:39,840
Speaker 4: we're sitting around and with our our claim. So let's

1480
01:16:39,880 --> 01:16:42,400
Speaker 4: let's start moving again, and we're like, it's gonna be impossible.

1481
01:16:42,439 --> 01:16:45,040
Speaker 4: It's like nothing that we can do. What we're gonna

1482
01:16:45,040 --> 01:16:47,400
Speaker 4: be able to do, we're gonna have to wait till

1483
01:16:47,400 --> 01:16:50,360
Speaker 4: after this is over to sell anything and get anything

1484
01:16:50,439 --> 01:16:54,840
Speaker 4: off the ground. So where we're kicking things around, Trevon

1485
01:16:55,040 --> 01:16:59,040
Speaker 4: comes with this idea. And the idea was the uh

1486
01:16:59,800 --> 01:17:02,640
Speaker 4: earth only idea that would become to disant strangers. This

1487
01:17:02,840 --> 01:17:03,960
Speaker 4: is post George Floyd.

1488
01:17:04,040 --> 01:17:06,040
Speaker 1: Now wow.

1489
01:17:06,160 --> 01:17:10,719
Speaker 4: And the feeling that we're all feeling is because people

1490
01:17:10,760 --> 01:17:12,840
Speaker 4: we talk about George Floyd as if it existed in

1491
01:17:12,920 --> 01:17:16,320
Speaker 4: the vacuum. It didn't. It was Ama R. Barry, George Floyd,

1492
01:17:16,360 --> 01:17:22,240
Speaker 4: Breonna Taylor, like all happening together, not time wise, but

1493
01:17:22,320 --> 01:17:24,920
Speaker 4: we were all learning about them at the same time.

1494
01:17:25,000 --> 01:17:26,960
Speaker 4: It was like this huge thing to where we've been

1495
01:17:27,000 --> 01:17:29,040
Speaker 4: inside for so long. Our brains are going to fucking

1496
01:17:29,120 --> 01:17:32,360
Speaker 4: explode with everything that's going wrong right now for America

1497
01:17:32,760 --> 01:17:35,920
Speaker 4: but specifically for Black Americans. And so he comes with

1498
01:17:36,000 --> 01:17:38,120
Speaker 4: this idea and he goes, when we come out of

1499
01:17:38,120 --> 01:17:39,519
Speaker 4: the pandemic, this is what we should do. And I

1500
01:17:39,600 --> 01:17:42,920
Speaker 4: was like, now, we got to do it now. He's like, what,

1501
01:17:43,280 --> 01:17:45,559
Speaker 4: And I have to be honest about this. The reason

1502
01:17:45,600 --> 01:17:47,800
Speaker 4: why we all decided to do it now was two reasons.

1503
01:17:47,960 --> 01:17:51,360
Speaker 4: Number One, we knew that in the climate that we

1504
01:17:51,439 --> 01:17:55,840
Speaker 4: were in that we could get this to the finish

1505
01:17:55,960 --> 01:17:59,920
Speaker 4: line and get it and like and because there weren't

1506
01:18:00,120 --> 01:18:05,080
Speaker 4: many productions and and get significant buzz based upon the

1507
01:18:05,200 --> 01:18:08,599
Speaker 4: social the moment that we were in and the climate

1508
01:18:08,680 --> 01:18:11,559
Speaker 4: that we were in, right if we executed, I knew

1509
01:18:11,600 --> 01:18:12,400
Speaker 4: we could win an Oscar.

1510
01:18:12,520 --> 01:18:15,240
Speaker 1: That's why that that's why that you thought you could

1511
01:18:15,240 --> 01:18:18,040
Speaker 1: win an Oscar with the short Oh wow, oh okay.

1512
01:18:18,240 --> 01:18:20,320
Speaker 4: Go back and look at the text that I said,

1513
01:18:20,720 --> 01:18:25,400
Speaker 4: that's it, I said, Bosama judged Boza like that.

1514
01:18:25,720 --> 01:18:27,439
Speaker 1: It didn't say Oscar on there, it.

1515
01:18:27,680 --> 01:18:32,479
Speaker 4: Said Oscar Bozema who we who? By the way, this

1516
01:18:32,600 --> 01:18:36,000
Speaker 4: is a great pal to have in La. She is amazing.

1517
01:18:36,479 --> 01:18:38,720
Speaker 4: And I was trying to get her to have them

1518
01:18:38,800 --> 01:18:41,519
Speaker 4: buy it or help us, but she couldn't. She couldn't

1519
01:18:41,520 --> 01:18:44,920
Speaker 4: even she couldn't even read the script. Uh she because

1520
01:18:44,960 --> 01:18:48,720
Speaker 4: it was unsolicited material. And she was very professional about it.

1521
01:18:49,120 --> 01:18:52,360
Speaker 4: But was somebody who helped us all throughout the way

1522
01:18:52,400 --> 01:18:54,880
Speaker 4: in terms of coming to screenings, in terms of being

1523
01:18:55,080 --> 01:19:01,000
Speaker 4: just an amazing human being, right an amazing me. So

1524
01:19:02,400 --> 01:19:04,839
Speaker 4: so I told him, I said, we're gonna win Academy

1525
01:19:04,880 --> 01:19:06,720
Speaker 4: war for this. I said it right then, now that

1526
01:19:06,840 --> 01:19:09,280
Speaker 4: day have been shot like like now day havent shot.

1527
01:19:09,320 --> 01:19:12,000
Speaker 4: Said We're gonnain a Cademy war for this. So we

1528
01:19:12,160 --> 01:19:15,680
Speaker 4: do it, we execute, we get the award and the

1529
01:19:15,840 --> 01:19:19,160
Speaker 4: night of standing there being in a room with Jesse Williams,

1530
01:19:19,600 --> 01:19:24,720
Speaker 4: great friend Puff was on that with us, Kevin Durant.

1531
01:19:24,680 --> 01:19:27,560
Speaker 1: That's my guy, don't I like? What was I not

1532
01:19:27,680 --> 01:19:29,400
Speaker 1: supposed to say? What I was supposed to say?

1533
01:19:31,240 --> 01:19:36,040
Speaker 4: Mike, Mike Conley, Kevin Durant, Rich Climbing, everybody came together

1534
01:19:36,120 --> 01:19:39,880
Speaker 4: to make it. It was just like, man, Carrie, it

1535
01:19:39,960 --> 01:19:41,560
Speaker 4: was like, we just said, fuck it, let's do it.

1536
01:19:42,479 --> 01:19:45,320
Speaker 4: Shout to everybody's Rogers and Colin Craig. Everyone is like,

1537
01:19:45,400 --> 01:19:47,240
Speaker 4: we said, fuck it, let's do it, and we did it,

1538
01:19:47,400 --> 01:19:50,840
Speaker 4: and we we did it. And the thing about holding

1539
01:19:50,880 --> 01:19:57,599
Speaker 4: the oscar was the whole entire time I was at TMC,

1540
01:19:58,640 --> 01:20:03,880
Speaker 4: I enjoyed being on television. I enjoyed my co workers immensely, sure, right,

1541
01:20:04,040 --> 01:20:07,240
Speaker 4: and so it's not like I hated it, but it

1542
01:20:07,360 --> 01:20:10,760
Speaker 4: wasn't inspiring. It wasn't anything that I thought, Look what

1543
01:20:10,880 --> 01:20:14,920
Speaker 4: we fucking did. And that feeling, if you ever have

1544
01:20:15,120 --> 01:20:18,080
Speaker 4: that feeling, if you ever have that feeling, look what

1545
01:20:18,240 --> 01:20:22,400
Speaker 4: we fucking did, not me, we Look what we fucking did.

1546
01:20:23,120 --> 01:20:26,240
Speaker 4: If you ever have that feeling, it's just amazing. And

1547
01:20:26,320 --> 01:20:28,519
Speaker 4: sitting there like looking at that when they called our

1548
01:20:28,600 --> 01:20:31,880
Speaker 4: name out, Khalika was there like we're all together. I

1549
01:20:32,080 --> 01:20:36,120
Speaker 4: just I couldn't believe that that actually happened. Like I

1550
01:20:36,160 --> 01:20:37,360
Speaker 4: couldn't believe that it happened.

1551
01:20:39,479 --> 01:20:41,880
Speaker 1: You just gave me a whole entire sermon. And what

1552
01:20:42,040 --> 01:20:44,240
Speaker 1: you just said is so real and I can relate

1553
01:20:44,280 --> 01:20:47,040
Speaker 1: to it on every single level. It's fine, it's all great,

1554
01:20:47,080 --> 01:20:49,360
Speaker 1: but what am I doing to really make change? And

1555
01:20:49,520 --> 01:20:52,479
Speaker 1: then you get this great project done and it was

1556
01:20:52,520 --> 01:20:55,760
Speaker 1: beautiful and the genius of the casting, like I really

1557
01:20:55,800 --> 01:20:58,200
Speaker 1: didn't know Joey had that in him, that skill set,

1558
01:20:58,439 --> 01:21:02,160
Speaker 1: like it was I I was today years old. I

1559
01:21:02,320 --> 01:21:04,559
Speaker 1: was just like, this was special. It was really special.

1560
01:21:05,080 --> 01:21:08,639
Speaker 1: And I and and and I don't know. I think

1561
01:21:08,640 --> 01:21:10,920
Speaker 1: that's a great way to end because you knew that, Yes,

1562
01:21:11,280 --> 01:21:13,160
Speaker 1: while you may have had that one platform at a

1563
01:21:13,200 --> 01:21:15,280
Speaker 1: point where it seemed like it was all end all,

1564
01:21:15,400 --> 01:21:17,880
Speaker 1: it wasn't inspiring. And you're and you change your lives,

1565
01:21:17,960 --> 01:21:19,720
Speaker 1: like you really are in opinions and you're a part

1566
01:21:19,760 --> 01:21:22,240
Speaker 1: of the culture. And I like you describing yourself as

1567
01:21:22,280 --> 01:21:25,360
Speaker 1: a popular contributor. You're that popular friend, popular ditributor, You're

1568
01:21:25,360 --> 01:21:28,000
Speaker 1: the popular friend. I think I think that's I think

1569
01:21:28,040 --> 01:21:30,519
Speaker 1: that's fair. And you're right about living in la we

1570
01:21:30,720 --> 01:21:33,639
Speaker 1: just are like, okay, got it. Like, if anything, we're

1571
01:21:33,720 --> 01:21:35,439
Speaker 1: not trying to be in the scene and be seen.

1572
01:21:35,720 --> 01:21:37,240
Speaker 1: I see you a few times. I don't be in

1573
01:21:37,320 --> 01:21:37,639
Speaker 1: the scene.

1574
01:21:39,240 --> 01:21:45,280
Speaker 4: People from here are legitimately the least Hollywood people that

1575
01:21:45,439 --> 01:21:49,280
Speaker 4: you will ever meet. It's so weird people who are

1576
01:21:49,439 --> 01:21:52,639
Speaker 4: from here. I'm telling you, y'all talking about La people.

1577
01:21:52,680 --> 01:21:55,519
Speaker 4: Y'all never been to the GS. I don't go. I've

1578
01:21:55,560 --> 01:21:58,679
Speaker 4: never been to the gsy' I've never been to the GS.

1579
01:21:59,360 --> 01:22:01,000
Speaker 4: I got, I got, I got, I appreciate it. I

1580
01:22:01,080 --> 01:22:02,800
Speaker 4: gotta ask you one thing before I go, though, because

1581
01:22:02,840 --> 01:22:04,240
Speaker 4: you because you said, oh, let's talk.

1582
01:22:04,360 --> 01:22:06,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, if you want to talk sports, I literally monopulate.

1583
01:22:07,040 --> 01:22:08,880
Speaker 1: I literally only do like forty five minutes a hour.

1584
01:22:08,920 --> 01:22:10,720
Speaker 1: I took twenty five extra minutes because we got into

1585
01:22:10,800 --> 01:22:13,800
Speaker 1: this conversation. Sorry about that. Whatever. If you want to

1586
01:22:13,840 --> 01:22:16,640
Speaker 1: talk sports, you one thing about you?

1587
01:22:17,479 --> 01:22:19,880
Speaker 4: Yes, well, y'all gonna well, y'all gonna kick the bucket

1588
01:22:19,920 --> 01:22:20,720
Speaker 4: on the Chip Kelly thing.

1589
01:22:22,680 --> 01:22:26,479
Speaker 1: Oh gosh, I I listen, and I'm bold about this too.

1590
01:22:26,960 --> 01:22:29,120
Speaker 1: The eighty never wants to hear it. I've told the

1591
01:22:29,200 --> 01:22:31,080
Speaker 1: eighty over and over again. I was like, he's not

1592
01:22:31,200 --> 01:22:33,960
Speaker 1: the man, he's not smart, he's had his moment. It's

1593
01:22:34,000 --> 01:22:36,360
Speaker 1: coming gone go get a real like a hard nosed

1594
01:22:36,439 --> 01:22:38,479
Speaker 1: SEC coach and offer him a ton of money. I

1595
01:22:38,600 --> 01:22:41,800
Speaker 1: was like, because I honestly believe the division is weak.

1596
01:22:41,880 --> 01:22:44,280
Speaker 1: They are losing. They losing transfer. I mean literally, people

1597
01:22:44,280 --> 01:22:46,479
Speaker 1: are transferring all the time because they don't fool with Chip.

1598
01:22:46,560 --> 01:22:48,200
Speaker 1: Chip is always the smartest man in the room.

1599
01:22:48,560 --> 01:22:53,400
Speaker 4: Why, Oh, they're gonna win the division this year?

1600
01:22:54,520 --> 01:22:56,720
Speaker 1: Oh yes, okay, you don't mean like a national champ?

1601
01:22:56,800 --> 01:22:58,280
Speaker 4: No, no, no, no no no. I think I think.

1602
01:22:58,360 --> 01:23:01,519
Speaker 4: I think U c l A is a lie to

1603
01:23:01,640 --> 01:23:02,639
Speaker 4: win a division. Issue.

1604
01:23:04,280 --> 01:23:07,680
Speaker 1: If they don't, it will speak more about who the

1605
01:23:07,800 --> 01:23:10,000
Speaker 1: coaches and than who the players are.

1606
01:23:10,360 --> 01:23:10,880
Speaker 4: You know what I mean?

1607
01:23:11,000 --> 01:23:14,120
Speaker 1: Because in this city where everyone wants to stay in

1608
01:23:14,280 --> 01:23:16,280
Speaker 1: LA or at least come to LA and be famous,

1609
01:23:16,320 --> 01:23:21,479
Speaker 1: people understand. People understand what it means to play here.

1610
01:23:21,600 --> 01:23:25,240
Speaker 1: So here's the point. All the time, when the Lakers

1611
01:23:25,280 --> 01:23:27,240
Speaker 1: are looking for a head coach, they're also looking for

1612
01:23:27,280 --> 01:23:29,080
Speaker 1: somebody who can step out of mastros and be like,

1613
01:23:29,160 --> 01:23:31,840
Speaker 1: I'm with my boo. They looking for the slick shit, right,

1614
01:23:31,960 --> 01:23:35,400
Speaker 1: they're always, But they took a page from Mick Cronin,

1615
01:23:35,439 --> 01:23:37,519
Speaker 1: who isn't slick, just hard nose. Put my head down.

1616
01:23:37,560 --> 01:23:40,280
Speaker 1: I'm this big as a head coach for UCLA, and

1617
01:23:40,360 --> 01:23:42,120
Speaker 1: I'm about winning. I don't care about any of the

1618
01:23:42,200 --> 01:23:44,240
Speaker 1: other shit, which is why the players have done so

1619
01:23:44,400 --> 01:23:47,960
Speaker 1: well getting them over, getting them like minded, the mentality

1620
01:23:48,040 --> 01:23:50,200
Speaker 1: and not being pretty to win is something totally different,

1621
01:23:50,280 --> 01:23:52,320
Speaker 1: like to go for the kill shot, like go take

1622
01:23:52,479 --> 01:23:55,160
Speaker 1: the game, Go take the game. Like a lot of

1623
01:23:55,240 --> 01:23:57,640
Speaker 1: the guys that we recruit or do have this this

1624
01:23:57,960 --> 01:24:01,920
Speaker 1: Hollywood sensibility, and sometimes it's been given to them. They're

1625
01:24:01,960 --> 01:24:04,760
Speaker 1: not I didn't grow up in Baton Rouge. I didn't

1626
01:24:04,760 --> 01:24:06,280
Speaker 1: have to fight for what I had to eat like

1627
01:24:06,360 --> 01:24:08,200
Speaker 1: we don't. These guys we get a lot of these

1628
01:24:08,240 --> 01:24:09,960
Speaker 1: guys are privileged that we get that play on the

1629
01:24:10,000 --> 01:24:12,800
Speaker 1: team like they grew up differently. And so sometimes, as

1630
01:24:12,920 --> 01:24:14,479
Speaker 1: you would say, you need a goon and we need

1631
01:24:14,520 --> 01:24:16,720
Speaker 1: a couple of really just good goons on both on

1632
01:24:16,960 --> 01:24:19,320
Speaker 1: basketball and football, Mick has been able to try to

1633
01:24:19,360 --> 01:24:22,560
Speaker 1: implement that. I'm not a fan of Sure, I just

1634
01:24:22,680 --> 01:24:24,759
Speaker 1: not a fanship Kelly. I work with him a few times.

1635
01:24:24,800 --> 01:24:26,240
Speaker 1: I don't believe him. I don't even know if he

1636
01:24:26,320 --> 01:24:30,560
Speaker 1: believes himself, and he is eight hundred percent he is

1637
01:24:30,680 --> 01:24:36,160
Speaker 1: one affected by Hollywood. Well, you watch some of these

1638
01:24:36,240 --> 01:24:38,439
Speaker 1: coaches that come here, they are affected. They get here

1639
01:24:38,479 --> 01:24:45,400
Speaker 1: and they get lost and they want to be famous. Happens, right, I.

1640
01:24:45,439 --> 01:24:54,120
Speaker 4: Can't say ship that did you? Me and Rachel was there, Me,

1641
01:24:54,360 --> 01:24:58,000
Speaker 4: Rachel Kala and Brian we went. I was there over

1642
01:24:58,120 --> 01:25:01,160
Speaker 4: us like very they looked.

1643
01:25:01,560 --> 01:25:04,439
Speaker 1: I look, you were like, they're gonna take it all

1644
01:25:04,560 --> 01:25:05,160
Speaker 1: you was ready.

1645
01:25:05,880 --> 01:25:08,559
Speaker 4: I wanted them to because I wanted to believe. Obviously

1646
01:25:08,600 --> 01:25:11,519
Speaker 4: the season, yeah, well I wanted us to believe. But

1647
01:25:11,600 --> 01:25:14,960
Speaker 4: so look, I thought it was very interesting when they

1648
01:25:15,040 --> 01:25:17,240
Speaker 4: hired him. So I always talked to UCLA people about

1649
01:25:17,280 --> 01:25:21,800
Speaker 4: UCLA sports because I don't understand like U c l

1650
01:25:21,880 --> 01:25:25,439
Speaker 4: A obviously dominating basketball, and it really didn't really in

1651
01:25:25,560 --> 01:25:27,240
Speaker 4: many sports, right they went.

1652
01:25:27,160 --> 01:25:31,479
Speaker 1: Off in mini sports in many sports, Yes, in many sports.

1653
01:25:31,840 --> 01:25:32,439
Speaker 5: I think.

1654
01:25:34,600 --> 01:25:36,600
Speaker 1: I do believe that it's hard to obviously live up

1655
01:25:36,600 --> 01:25:38,640
Speaker 1: to the Wizard. So Mike is good. No one's ever

1656
01:25:38,680 --> 01:25:40,920
Speaker 1: gonna be John Wooden. And the in the in the

1657
01:25:40,960 --> 01:25:42,640
Speaker 1: script is get here and win. We're gonna give you

1658
01:25:42,640 --> 01:25:43,960
Speaker 1: a couple of years, but get here and where you

1659
01:25:44,040 --> 01:25:46,360
Speaker 1: can't just make it to the final four, that's fine,

1660
01:25:46,640 --> 01:25:48,360
Speaker 1: keep doing it, make it to the championship, great, but

1661
01:25:48,439 --> 01:25:50,680
Speaker 1: did you win? And obviously the last time they had

1662
01:25:50,720 --> 01:25:54,560
Speaker 1: a chip was ninety three, ninety four ninety four with

1663
01:25:54,720 --> 01:25:56,240
Speaker 1: Tyas Edney, remember.

1664
01:25:56,240 --> 01:26:01,200
Speaker 4: Cameron Dollar, Tys Edney and O Band, Charlie, Toby Bailey.

1665
01:26:01,800 --> 01:26:02,800
Speaker 4: Where's Toby.

1666
01:26:05,320 --> 01:26:09,080
Speaker 1: Bailey is an agent now? But yeah, he's a sports agent.

1667
01:26:09,600 --> 01:26:12,000
Speaker 1: But I I my school it's different and I and

1668
01:26:12,040 --> 01:26:13,559
Speaker 1: I respect, but it's a lot of money and it's

1669
01:26:13,560 --> 01:26:15,000
Speaker 1: a lot and it's a lot of politics. Do you

1670
01:26:15,080 --> 01:26:16,680
Speaker 1: talk about a school like that. It's a lot of

1671
01:26:16,720 --> 01:26:18,800
Speaker 1: politics and you know that. But it would be nice

1672
01:26:18,880 --> 01:26:21,759
Speaker 1: if they spent some major bread on somebody who recruited

1673
01:26:22,120 --> 01:26:24,400
Speaker 1: a bunch of like, we need a few goons, we

1674
01:26:24,520 --> 01:26:28,040
Speaker 1: just need, if not a handful, I think the we

1675
01:26:28,120 --> 01:26:31,080
Speaker 1: don't need the you know all the popular stars sons

1676
01:26:31,360 --> 01:26:34,280
Speaker 1: playing there? You know, oh you also know who's on

1677
01:26:34,320 --> 01:26:36,760
Speaker 1: that championship team and that you just mentioned in ninety four.

1678
01:26:36,840 --> 01:26:39,439
Speaker 1: Bob Myers, who is now the GM and president of

1679
01:26:39,840 --> 01:26:42,000
Speaker 1: the Golden State Warrior ever knew that he never played.

1680
01:26:42,640 --> 01:26:45,559
Speaker 1: He never played, not well he got any like trash minutes.

1681
01:26:45,560 --> 01:26:48,160
Speaker 1: Obviously he played trash minutes. But look at that. His

1682
01:26:48,479 --> 01:26:51,720
Speaker 1: career is arguably more successful than one Toby Bailey's or

1683
01:26:52,160 --> 01:26:54,439
Speaker 1: Chris Johnson, like I'd go down the list. Can you

1684
01:26:54,520 --> 01:26:55,920
Speaker 1: believe that isn't that crazy, isn't it.

1685
01:26:55,920 --> 01:26:58,320
Speaker 4: I believed that I always looked at him like he

1686
01:26:58,520 --> 01:27:01,559
Speaker 4: was he was really in for like a GM dude,

1687
01:27:02,160 --> 01:27:05,200
Speaker 4: but like and super tall. Yeah, super Talla.

1688
01:27:06,040 --> 01:27:10,080
Speaker 1: I just want to get its interesting, kay, Okay, So

1689
01:27:10,280 --> 01:27:12,240
Speaker 1: I adore you. Thank you for giving me more time

1690
01:27:12,280 --> 01:27:13,840
Speaker 1: than you should have. You guys, go out and get

1691
01:27:13,880 --> 01:27:16,200
Speaker 1: this book. I really I I And I'm not just

1692
01:27:16,240 --> 01:27:18,840
Speaker 1: saying that. I'm fascinated with your intellect and I love

1693
01:27:18,920 --> 01:27:22,599
Speaker 1: your perspective. That crazy entire Van late than in the house,

1694
01:27:22,680 --> 01:27:24,080
Speaker 1: not to be confused with that other dude.

1695
01:27:25,160 --> 01:27:26,360
Speaker 4: Thank you so much, Garrett.

1696
01:27:27,680 --> 01:27:30,559
Speaker 1: So I hope you all enjoyed Van. He I mean,

1697
01:27:30,600 --> 01:27:33,400
Speaker 1: he really it's interesting. I have a lot of people

1698
01:27:33,479 --> 01:27:35,720
Speaker 1: in my life that I think that can go to

1699
01:27:35,880 --> 01:27:38,120
Speaker 1: level to level to level. And it's not about who's

1700
01:27:38,160 --> 01:27:40,560
Speaker 1: the smartest person in the room, although sometimes it is,

1701
01:27:41,080 --> 01:27:43,880
Speaker 1: but it is the art of understanding what you're feeling

1702
01:27:43,960 --> 01:27:46,040
Speaker 1: and being able to express your thoughts and opinions in

1703
01:27:46,360 --> 01:27:48,639
Speaker 1: a very well crafted way. And sometimes when you express

1704
01:27:48,680 --> 01:27:52,479
Speaker 1: your thoughts and opinions that offends people. But Van has

1705
01:27:52,520 --> 01:27:57,080
Speaker 1: a way of being not necessarily neutral but not necessarily offensive.

1706
01:27:57,160 --> 01:27:59,439
Speaker 1: It's just the truth. And if you follow him on

1707
01:27:59,479 --> 01:28:01,640
Speaker 1: social which I think you do, it's funny. If you

1708
01:28:01,720 --> 01:28:05,720
Speaker 1: read his book, it's funny. You know what Charlemagne told

1709
01:28:05,720 --> 01:28:09,080
Speaker 1: me this. They're really good friends, so it's apropos.

1710
01:28:09,520 --> 01:28:10,000
Speaker 4: He says.

1711
01:28:11,200 --> 01:28:13,280
Speaker 1: One day, we're just laughing about something that was very

1712
01:28:13,360 --> 01:28:16,200
Speaker 1: sad in the culture. He said, Black folks know how

1713
01:28:16,200 --> 01:28:19,040
Speaker 1: to do trauma better than anybody else, meaning we really

1714
01:28:19,120 --> 01:28:21,760
Speaker 1: know how to laugh at our pain. And that is

1715
01:28:21,840 --> 01:28:24,880
Speaker 1: why I think this book is fascinating. And I think

1716
01:28:25,040 --> 01:28:27,800
Speaker 1: that Van being very honest about something I don't hear

1717
01:28:27,840 --> 01:28:30,200
Speaker 1: a lot of men being honest about as special, especially

1718
01:28:30,280 --> 01:28:33,680
Speaker 1: black men. Get the book. It's really something that we

1719
01:28:33,800 --> 01:28:35,559
Speaker 1: all should have, that we should be reading as women,

1720
01:28:35,680 --> 01:28:36,920
Speaker 1: that we should be reading as men, and that we

1721
01:28:36,960 --> 01:28:41,880
Speaker 1: should be telling other people about. And at this moment,

1722
01:28:43,160 --> 01:28:47,720
Speaker 1: I'm pretty tired. I've been overseas without my luggage, but

1723
01:28:47,760 --> 01:28:49,719
Speaker 1: I ain't complaining. Don't fool with Air France. Don't fool

1724
01:28:49,720 --> 01:28:52,760
Speaker 1: with Air France. Don't fool with Air France. If you

1725
01:28:52,880 --> 01:28:58,760
Speaker 1: want your luggage, I got mine though, just the last

1726
01:28:58,840 --> 01:29:03,280
Speaker 1: day at my trip. Gonna stop complaining, though, Stay positive,

1727
01:29:03,360 --> 01:29:05,840
Speaker 1: carry talk to you guys next week.

1728
01:29:07,000 --> 01:29:07,280
Speaker 4: Bye.