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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Therapy for Black Girls Podcast, a weekly

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Speaker 1: conversation about mental health, personal development, and all the small

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Speaker 1: decisions we can make to become the best possible versions

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Speaker 1: of ourselves. I'm your host, Dr Joy hard and Bradford,

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Speaker 1: a licensed psychologist in Atlanta, Georgia. For more information or

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Speaker 1: to find a therapist in your area, visit our website

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Speaker 1: at Therapy for Black Girls dot com. While I hope

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Speaker 1: you love listening to and learning from the podcast, it

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Speaker 1: is not meant to be a substitute for relationship with

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Speaker 1: a licensed mental health professional. Hey, y'all, thanks so much

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Speaker 1: for joining me for Session one six of the Therapy

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Speaker 1: for Black Girls Podcast. This is our last session of

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Speaker 1: Can y'all believe it's almost like most of you? As

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Speaker 1: the year wraps up, I tend to get reflective and

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Speaker 1: thinking about what this year has been like and how

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Speaker 1: I like the next year to look, And I thought

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Speaker 1: it might be helpful to share some of the questions

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Speaker 1: I'm pondering with all of you, to perhaps help you

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Speaker 1: to set the tone for your as well. Now, by

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Speaker 1: no means is this list meant to be exhaustive. I

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Speaker 1: don't want you leaving this episode thinking that you have

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Speaker 1: to focus on every single one of these areas next year.

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Speaker 1: I just want to share them in the hopes of

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Speaker 1: getting you to think about what could look like for

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Speaker 1: you in any areas that might need a little bit

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Speaker 1: of extra exploration. Question No. One. What kind of physical

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Speaker 1: activity will you participate in on a regular basis? Have

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Speaker 1: you been doing something that you love that you plan

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Speaker 1: to continue. Will you be trying out something new? What's

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Speaker 1: a plan for moving your body in You heard Dr

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Speaker 1: Jackie and I in Session ninety one talk all about

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Speaker 1: the mental health benefits we received from regular physical activity,

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Speaker 1: so I definitely want you to consider what that will

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Speaker 1: look like for you next year. Number two, how can

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Speaker 1: you add healthier food options to your diet? I don't

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Speaker 1: know if you've seen the most recent episode of Red

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Speaker 1: Table Talk, but if you haven't, you definitely should check

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Speaker 1: it out. The whole episode share the results of some

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Speaker 1: testing the Smith family had done earlier this year to

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Speaker 1: find out more about their health and how what they

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Speaker 1: were eating was impacting their health. I learned quite a

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Speaker 1: lot from the episode and want to do more research

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Speaker 1: into how food impacts our body overall, but more specifically

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Speaker 1: our mood. Question Number three what role is social media

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Speaker 1: playing in your life? So this is one of those

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Speaker 1: areas that can be really complicated. Right. They're some incredibly

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Speaker 1: great things about social media. It allows us to connect

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Speaker 1: with one another, find our people, discussed important issues, etcetera.

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Speaker 1: But it can also impact our mental health and ways

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Speaker 1: that I don't think we always recognize. Something I've noticed

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Speaker 1: about myself is that when I'm procrastinating on working something

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Speaker 1: that I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by, I tend to

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Speaker 1: do more scrolling on social media. I've also heard other

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Speaker 1: share that they've noticed an increase in anxiety after they

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Speaker 1: post things on social media, feeling occupied by how people

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Speaker 1: will respond or worried about the reception it will have. So,

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Speaker 1: like I said, there are lots of great things about

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Speaker 1: social media, but I just want to make sure that

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Speaker 1: we're keeping it in perspective and clear about how we're

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Speaker 1: using it. If you haven't already selected the option on

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Speaker 1: your phone to see how much time you're spending on

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Speaker 1: your phone every week, I'd really encourage you to do

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Speaker 1: this because it can be a great weekly reminder of

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Speaker 1: whether the time you're spending on your phone proportional to

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Speaker 1: the rest of your life. Question number four, what is

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Speaker 1: your bed of time? Do you strive to get seven

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Speaker 1: to nine hours of sleep each night? If not, what's

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Speaker 1: stopping you? Do you have a solid bedtime routine that

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Speaker 1: signals to your brain that it's time to shut down

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Speaker 1: for the day. If not, think about what yours might

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Speaker 1: look like. Does the temperature need to be set to

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Speaker 1: a certain level. Do you need a diffuser with a

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Speaker 1: scent that induces calm? Do you need complete darkness? Whatever

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Speaker 1: works for you, try figuring out a routine that helps

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Speaker 1: you to get optimal sleep each night. Question number five

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Speaker 1: are there ways to deepen your friendships? You might have

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Speaker 1: some girls that you kick it with, grab drinks with,

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Speaker 1: go to church with, but is there a space for

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Speaker 1: these connections to be deepened? Can you all work together

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Speaker 1: to create a space where you can be more vulnerable

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Speaker 1: with one another? Does it feel safe for you to

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Speaker 1: be more transparent with m Can you share how you

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Speaker 1: really think and feel without feeling judged. I want you

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Speaker 1: to try opening up a conversation about this at your

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Speaker 1: next gathering and see where it takes you. Number six,

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Speaker 1: how do you want to grow spiritually? Maybe you've had

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Speaker 1: religious or spiritual practices that you've adopted in the past

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Speaker 1: and they no longer seem to fit, or maybe there's

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Speaker 1: room for you to dive deeper into your current practice.

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Speaker 1: But what do you want your spiritual life to look like?

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Speaker 1: In number seven, how are you giving back? Are you

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Speaker 1: involved in some kind of tutoring program on your campus?

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Speaker 1: Do you volunteer at a local shelter? In what ways

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Speaker 1: are you pouring into someone else? Sometimes when we're feeling

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Speaker 1: overly concerned and really consumed by the things going on

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Speaker 1: in our lives, it can be really helpful to get

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Speaker 1: involved in giving back to others. Question number eight, how

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Speaker 1: will you say no more next year? Y'all know that

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Speaker 1: one of our favorite words around here is boundaries, So

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Speaker 1: how will you be adding any new ones? Are tightening

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Speaker 1: up some old ones? If you're confused about where to start,

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Speaker 1: look around at the interactions in your life that leaves

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Speaker 1: you feeling drained and resentful. It's likely there's some boundary

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Speaker 1: work that needs to be done there. Number nine, Do

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Speaker 1: you have a clear idea of what kinds of things

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Speaker 1: are important to you? And how easy is it to

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Speaker 1: see this in the way that you live? What kinds

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Speaker 1: of issues are really important to you. Are you intentional

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Speaker 1: about crafting your life as much as possible to match

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Speaker 1: these things? Number ten? How are you going to have

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Speaker 1: more fun? You're gonna have more game nights, take a

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Speaker 1: dance class. What is your idea of fun and how

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Speaker 1: can you do it more often? No? For eleven? In

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Speaker 1: which areas of your life do you need to be

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Speaker 1: more present? I know that as busy as many of

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Speaker 1: us are, it can be really easy and tempting to

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Speaker 1: just go from one thing to the next. But where

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Speaker 1: do you need to slow down and make it count

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Speaker 1: a little more? I know for me, I'd like to

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Speaker 1: be more intentional with my little guys. Days often feel

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Speaker 1: like a routine that just plays on repeat, So I

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Speaker 1: want to work on slowing down those moments and really

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Speaker 1: being more intentional. Question number twelve, what are your financial goals?

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Speaker 1: Are you planning to save a certain amount, pay off

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Speaker 1: a credit card, get more educated about finances? There are

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Speaker 1: some incredible resources by black women to help you with this.

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Speaker 1: I want you to check out the Journey to Launch podcast,

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Speaker 1: my fab Finance, the budget Nista, and the Finance Bar

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Speaker 1: are all incredible to get you started on this journey.

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Speaker 1: I'll definitely be sure to link to all those in

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Speaker 1: the show notes. Question number thirteen, are there expectations in

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Speaker 1: any of your relationships that have gone unexpressed? You know

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Speaker 1: how sometimes you have all these ideas about what you

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Speaker 1: would like your relationship with so and so to look like,

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Speaker 1: except that you never tell them that. Let's work on

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Speaker 1: having more conversations about what we expect with the other

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Speaker 1: people in our lives. Question number fourteen, what's working at work?

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Speaker 1: Is it time to chat with your boss about a promotion?

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Speaker 1: Are there additional skills you need to acquire to take

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Speaker 1: things to the next level? Is it time to look

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Speaker 1: for something new? I want you to take an honest

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Speaker 1: assessment of how things are going at work and then

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Speaker 1: plan accordingly. Number fifteen, What books are you planning to

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Speaker 1: read next year? So? I'm guilty. I have a huge

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Speaker 1: habit of starting to read a bunch of books that

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Speaker 1: I never actually finished, and I really want to work

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Speaker 1: on finishing books next year. So what kinds of things

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Speaker 1: have you been wanting to learn more about? Or what

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Speaker 1: kinds of fiction stories leave you feeling thrilled and delighted.

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Speaker 1: I want you to add some of those to your list.

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Speaker 1: Number sixteen have you taken care of your estate planning. Now.

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Speaker 1: I know this can be a hard topic to tackle

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Speaker 1: and it often feels very heavy for me to even

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Speaker 1: think about. But do you have your affairs and order

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Speaker 1: in the event that something happens to you. I want

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Speaker 1: you to find a lawyer who specializes in the state

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Speaker 1: planning and go ahead and get that done in twenty twenty.

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Speaker 1: I'll link you to an excellent podcast episode by my

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Speaker 1: former attorney or Steel that she did all about a

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Speaker 1: state planning that will be in the show notes. Question

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Speaker 1: number seventeen, how do you plan to play bigger and

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Speaker 1: take up more space? Where in your life is there

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Speaker 1: room for you to be more expansive, more expressive? Have

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Speaker 1: you notice that you shriveled a little in one area

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Speaker 1: of your life, perhaps in response to society or someone

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Speaker 1: making you feel like you were too much? It's time

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Speaker 1: to turn it up a notch. You being all of

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Speaker 1: who you are gives others permission to do the same,

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Speaker 1: and the world needs all of who you are. So

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Speaker 1: I want you to come out of that corner you've

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Speaker 1: been hiding in and go after the thing that your

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Speaker 1: heart desires more than anything. Question number eighteen are there

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Speaker 1: any updates or modifications you want to make to your style.

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Speaker 1: Is it time to add a pop of color? Are

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Speaker 1: you thinking about trying a council wardrobe? Now? This is

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Speaker 1: definitely something I'm considering. I mean, even though most days

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Speaker 1: I'm in some version of T shirt, a sweatshirt and

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Speaker 1: some leggings, I'd still like to have a collection of

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Speaker 1: cute and comfy things for when I have to be

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Speaker 1: outside and presentable. Question number nineteen, how can you carve

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Speaker 1: out some time daily for stillness? So you heard Dr

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Speaker 1: Crystal Jones last week discuss the importance of us really

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Speaker 1: centering on focusing on being quiet and still with our

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Speaker 1: thoughts and in our body. We often do so much

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Speaker 1: coming and going, and sometimes this is to avoid being

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Speaker 1: alone with our thoughts. But we know that when we avoid,

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Speaker 1: things tend to become larger than they actually are. So

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Speaker 1: how are you going to create some time in your

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Speaker 1: schedule next year to just be quiet and still? And

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Speaker 1: then question number twenty, what will your word be for?

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Speaker 1: Is there any one thing in particular that you plan

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Speaker 1: to have as your priority next year? Again, if you

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Speaker 1: get really quiet and honest with yourself, is there a

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Speaker 1: theme that comes up for you? Maybe that should be

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Speaker 1: your word. It's really amazing how focusing on a single

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Speaker 1: thing and constant reminding yourself of it can help that

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Speaker 1: thing to grow in your life. My word for next

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Speaker 1: year is a discipline. If you've chosen one, I'd love

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Speaker 1: to hear what yours is as well. Additionally, I'd love

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Speaker 1: to hear if there are other questions you'll be reflecting

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Speaker 1: on as we embark upon. Be sure to share with

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Speaker 1: us on social media using the hashtag tv G and session.

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Speaker 1: And please be sure to share this episode with two

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Speaker 1: of your girls so that they can reflect on the

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Speaker 1: year they'd like to have as well. Remember that if

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Speaker 1: you're searching for a therapist in your area, check out

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Speaker 1: our therapist directory at Therapy for Black Girls dot com

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Speaker 1: slash directory, and please come on over and join us

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Speaker 1: in the Yellow Couse Collective. Y CEC is our private

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Speaker 1: community for the podcast, where we dive deeper into the

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Speaker 1: topics we start here and just about everything else. You

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Speaker 1: can join us at Therapy for Black Girls dot com

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Speaker 1: slash y c C. Thank y'all so much for being

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Speaker 1: a part of the Therapy for Black Girls community this year.

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Speaker 1: I am so thankful for all of your support and

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Speaker 1: can't wait to pick up where we left off in

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Speaker 1: I'm wishing you and your famili's are very happy holiday

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Speaker 1: season and an amazing new year. Take care of yourself.

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Speaker 1: We'll be back on January. A happy do you. Thank

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Speaker 1: for Lancy your Bobby Piker. Bye bye