1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:03,160 Speaker 1: There's really no way to say that without him getting offended. 2 00:00:03,720 --> 00:00:06,040 Speaker 1: But guess what the best thing for him to be 3 00:00:06,360 --> 00:00:23,439 Speaker 1: is right now offended by you. What's up? Everybody? Welcome 4 00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:27,320 Speaker 1: to the podcast. Thanks for listening wherever you're coming from. 5 00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:31,760 Speaker 1: I love to do this. Happy Monday to everybody. Happy bingers. 6 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:35,040 Speaker 1: If you've been binging this podcast, I love you. The 7 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:36,920 Speaker 1: way you could help me with this podcast. If you 8 00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:39,400 Speaker 1: want to help me, the best thing you could do 9 00:00:39,560 --> 00:00:42,000 Speaker 1: is tell a friend. I mean, you could share it 10 00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:44,120 Speaker 1: on whatever social media, but you know, like the best 11 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:47,159 Speaker 1: thing to do is just say, you know what, Granger 12 00:00:47,159 --> 00:00:49,199 Speaker 1: Smith podcast. I love listening to it. People are like, 13 00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:52,280 Speaker 1: where's that, and you're like, it's on the Apple podcast 14 00:00:52,360 --> 00:00:55,120 Speaker 1: app or on Spotify or on YouTube or wherever else. 15 00:00:55,200 --> 00:00:57,639 Speaker 1: You just tell them. That really helps me. I love 16 00:00:57,680 --> 00:00:59,680 Speaker 1: you guys. I love doing this. I love reading your 17 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:03,400 Speaker 1: questions as if we're just having a conversation between each other. 18 00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:07,320 Speaker 1: And you could email me Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. 19 00:01:07,480 --> 00:01:11,320 Speaker 1: Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. The question could be 20 00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:16,839 Speaker 1: about anything. First question subdecline says me, and the question says, 21 00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:19,720 Speaker 1: hey Granger, my name is Carter and I'm fifteen. I'm 22 00:01:19,720 --> 00:01:24,199 Speaker 1: from Madina, Ohio. I recently got hit and hospitalized during 23 00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:27,360 Speaker 1: a football game. The doctors found a non cancer assist 24 00:01:27,440 --> 00:01:30,280 Speaker 1: on my brain that needs brain surgery to remove it. 25 00:01:30,720 --> 00:01:33,120 Speaker 1: I'm contacting you because I don't know. You'll just give 26 00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:35,640 Speaker 1: me good advice, but I'm scared something bad is gonna 27 00:01:35,640 --> 00:01:38,200 Speaker 1: happen and I'll never be the same again. I know 28 00:01:38,360 --> 00:01:42,399 Speaker 1: God is with me, but for some reason, that's not helping. Sincerely, Carter, 29 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:47,080 Speaker 1: what's up, buddy? Shout out to Ohio. I've been to 30 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:50,160 Speaker 1: your town. I like it a lot, and I'm so 31 00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:52,600 Speaker 1: sorry that you're going through this. It's got to be 32 00:01:53,360 --> 00:01:58,320 Speaker 1: really scary and really tough for you, and a blessing 33 00:01:58,640 --> 00:02:00,640 Speaker 1: they could think about this, Carter, think about, first of all, 34 00:02:00,640 --> 00:02:04,960 Speaker 1: the blessing that you got hit in football and hospitalized 35 00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:07,480 Speaker 1: and through that they found this cyst on your brain. 36 00:02:09,360 --> 00:02:12,720 Speaker 1: So right now, I'm like, Okay, well, somebody's looking after you. 37 00:02:13,240 --> 00:02:15,840 Speaker 1: That's the first thing I could say, is that a coincidence. 38 00:02:15,880 --> 00:02:19,080 Speaker 1: I don't believe in coincidences. I don't believe in accidents. 39 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:22,320 Speaker 1: I don't believe in luck. I believe in God's purpose. 40 00:02:23,040 --> 00:02:25,520 Speaker 1: So let's get right to what you know. I'm probably 41 00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:28,760 Speaker 1: gonna say your last sentence says, I know God is 42 00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:31,560 Speaker 1: with me, but for some reason it's not helping. I'll 43 00:02:31,639 --> 00:02:36,160 Speaker 1: say this to you lovingly as a friend and been 44 00:02:36,200 --> 00:02:40,200 Speaker 1: I've been fifteen, and I'll say this straight up. You 45 00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:44,519 Speaker 1: don't know God's with you. You don't know. Let me 46 00:02:44,560 --> 00:02:49,240 Speaker 1: go one step further. You don't know God. You don't Carter. 47 00:02:50,320 --> 00:02:53,480 Speaker 1: Otherwise you wouldn't have said what you just said. You 48 00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:55,920 Speaker 1: would never say I know God is with me, but 49 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:59,720 Speaker 1: for some reason it's not helping. Well, my easy answers, 50 00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:04,160 Speaker 1: you don't know God, because if you knew God, as 51 00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:07,720 Speaker 1: revealed in the Bible, you wouldn't hesitate. You would be 52 00:03:07,800 --> 00:03:13,320 Speaker 1: bold and courageous. Go through the Bible. Look at some 53 00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:16,160 Speaker 1: of the promises, look at the character, the nature of him, 54 00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:19,520 Speaker 1: the sovereignty of him that means he is in control 55 00:03:19,680 --> 00:03:24,280 Speaker 1: of everything, everything is in his hands. You see that 56 00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:28,720 Speaker 1: as revealed in the Bible. You're not gonna You're not 57 00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:32,320 Speaker 1: gonna question if he's helping you or not, or if 58 00:03:32,320 --> 00:03:33,960 Speaker 1: he's with you or not, or if he is who 59 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:37,840 Speaker 1: he says he is or not. It's just plain and simple. 60 00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:42,360 Speaker 1: You'll come back to me and you'll go, Man, I'm scared. 61 00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:48,720 Speaker 1: I'm worried about the surgery, but I know God has 62 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:52,840 Speaker 1: a purpose in this. And so instead of asking why God, 63 00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:56,000 Speaker 1: or are you here God? Or is this gonna be okay? God, 64 00:03:56,040 --> 00:03:59,560 Speaker 1: You'll say, God, what am I gonna learn from? This? 65 00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:02,200 Speaker 1: Is the this is the biggest thing I've ever gone through. 66 00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:05,200 Speaker 1: I'm assuming Carter, this is your biggest thing you've ever 67 00:04:05,240 --> 00:04:08,119 Speaker 1: gone through, the most impactful thing you've ever gone through 68 00:04:08,120 --> 00:04:10,520 Speaker 1: in your life. And so you sit back on that 69 00:04:10,680 --> 00:04:14,120 Speaker 1: rock that he is and you go, I trust you. 70 00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:17,400 Speaker 1: I don't know what's going to happen. I'm praying that 71 00:04:17,440 --> 00:04:19,760 Speaker 1: the doctors have a steady hand and that the surgery 72 00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:22,560 Speaker 1: goes well, and that their education comes through and their 73 00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:25,360 Speaker 1: knowledge of my brain comes through, and that they perform 74 00:04:25,520 --> 00:04:28,960 Speaker 1: this surgery on the cyst and they remove it perfectly. 75 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:30,719 Speaker 1: And then I wake up and they tell me everything 76 00:04:30,839 --> 00:04:35,479 Speaker 1: is okay. I pray for that, But otherwise, if not, 77 00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:40,239 Speaker 1: I'm also praying for your purpose. I'm praying for whatever 78 00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:43,120 Speaker 1: needs to happen according to your purpose, for your will, 79 00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:47,000 Speaker 1: for your good will happen. And I trust that if 80 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:49,440 Speaker 1: I wake up and there was a problem, God forbid 81 00:04:49,440 --> 00:04:51,960 Speaker 1: that happen to you, buddy, But God forbid if there 82 00:04:52,080 --> 00:04:57,680 Speaker 1: was a problem. You go, God, Okay, Level two, what 83 00:04:57,760 --> 00:04:59,880 Speaker 1: are you telling me through this? Now? What do I 84 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:03,480 Speaker 1: need to learn through this? How do you find this stuff? 85 00:05:03,920 --> 00:05:06,040 Speaker 1: How do you find what I'm talking about? There's only 86 00:05:06,080 --> 00:05:09,479 Speaker 1: one book. It's called the Bible. You start going through that, 87 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:12,719 Speaker 1: You start reading some of his promises over and over 88 00:05:12,839 --> 00:05:15,880 Speaker 1: and over. You read the experiences that men had when 89 00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:18,479 Speaker 1: they encountered the glory of God. You find it in 90 00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:23,760 Speaker 1: Ezekiel chapter one. You find it in Daniel chapter ten. 91 00:05:24,279 --> 00:05:27,480 Speaker 1: You find it. In Revelation. You find it. Paul had 92 00:05:27,520 --> 00:05:31,160 Speaker 1: an encounter, Moses had an encounter, Elijah had an encounter. 93 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:35,440 Speaker 1: All these times when men encountered, Peter and John and 94 00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:39,320 Speaker 1: James had an encounter. When you see these men encountered 95 00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:42,800 Speaker 1: the glory of God, they all do the same thing. 96 00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:47,640 Speaker 1: They fall on their face. They fall on their face 97 00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:52,760 Speaker 1: because of the crazy glory that they're encountering. So if 98 00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:55,320 Speaker 1: you saw that, if you knew him in that way, 99 00:05:55,839 --> 00:06:00,440 Speaker 1: the Almighty Creator, in that way, you wouldn't say you here, 100 00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:04,520 Speaker 1: I don't really know. It's not helping this brain surgery thing. 101 00:06:04,920 --> 00:06:07,360 Speaker 1: I don't mean to downplay it because brain surgery is crazy. 102 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:11,640 Speaker 1: It's crazy serious. But if you saw that image, that 103 00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:13,680 Speaker 1: glory of God, you'd just be like you just fall 104 00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:15,680 Speaker 1: in your face and be like, I trust you, I 105 00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:19,000 Speaker 1: trust you. You're going to lead me through this, whatever 106 00:06:19,040 --> 00:06:23,280 Speaker 1: it means for my life. I trust you. That's it, man, 107 00:06:23,880 --> 00:06:31,960 Speaker 1: That's it. Carter. Next email, the subject line says connecting 108 00:06:32,279 --> 00:06:36,200 Speaker 1: reconnecting with my husband. Hey grangeer, I'd like to stay anonymous. 109 00:06:36,240 --> 00:06:39,600 Speaker 1: My husband is in the military. We're currently stationed in Maryland, 110 00:06:39,640 --> 00:06:42,320 Speaker 1: twenty four hours from my home state of Texas. When 111 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,960 Speaker 1: I first moved here, my husband had been stationed here 112 00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:48,160 Speaker 1: for a while, so he had already found a church 113 00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:50,520 Speaker 1: for us to go to. The first day I walked 114 00:06:50,520 --> 00:06:53,200 Speaker 1: into this church was the first day I finally felt 115 00:06:53,279 --> 00:06:57,320 Speaker 1: like home away from home. We quickly connected and began 116 00:06:57,400 --> 00:07:00,520 Speaker 1: going to every service and activity we could. That didn't 117 00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:03,039 Speaker 1: last long. After a couple months of going, my husband 118 00:07:03,080 --> 00:07:05,520 Speaker 1: Will switched to a night shift where he works every 119 00:07:05,520 --> 00:07:09,200 Speaker 1: other weekend, so it became hard to attend regularly. He 120 00:07:09,240 --> 00:07:11,480 Speaker 1: would go, I would go by myself on the weeks 121 00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:14,440 Speaker 1: that he was working, but then it got to where 122 00:07:14,440 --> 00:07:16,560 Speaker 1: my husband stopped going even on the days that he 123 00:07:16,640 --> 00:07:19,320 Speaker 1: was off. I mentioned going to church, and he always 124 00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:21,440 Speaker 1: has an excuse of why not to go. This really 125 00:07:21,520 --> 00:07:24,400 Speaker 1: upsets me because we both have always believed that it's 126 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:26,760 Speaker 1: important to be connected in the church wherever you are. 127 00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:31,560 Speaker 1: Since he's been on the night shift, he's become closer 128 00:07:31,640 --> 00:07:33,520 Speaker 1: with the men he works with who are atheist and 129 00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:37,880 Speaker 1: have expressed that anytime we mentioned God, they say that 130 00:07:39,840 --> 00:07:43,120 Speaker 1: they have spoken very disrespectful about God, and still my 131 00:07:43,200 --> 00:07:46,240 Speaker 1: husband likes to hang around them. He's been sleeping all 132 00:07:46,320 --> 00:07:47,920 Speaker 1: day until he has to get up and get ready 133 00:07:47,920 --> 00:07:50,520 Speaker 1: for work, and even on his days off, so we 134 00:07:50,560 --> 00:07:52,760 Speaker 1: barely even have time together anymore. It just seems like 135 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:55,720 Speaker 1: he has no motivation anymore, and it breaks my heart. 136 00:07:55,920 --> 00:07:58,840 Speaker 1: He was so full of life and joy and I 137 00:07:58,920 --> 00:08:01,200 Speaker 1: hate to see that it's gone. I've talked to him 138 00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:04,200 Speaker 1: about this, but he's just not really taking it seriously, 139 00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:06,360 Speaker 1: and I don't know how to get through to him. 140 00:08:06,440 --> 00:08:10,760 Speaker 1: Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you. Okay, Anonymous, 141 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:16,520 Speaker 1: it's a tough situation, but you're not alone. You're not 142 00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:20,600 Speaker 1: alone in a situation like this. Let me start here. 143 00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:28,480 Speaker 1: Don't nag him, don't nag him. He's he's he's working hard, 144 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:32,520 Speaker 1: he has a difficult job in the military. He's away 145 00:08:32,520 --> 00:08:36,439 Speaker 1: from home as well. He is he is stationed here 146 00:08:36,440 --> 00:08:41,360 Speaker 1: in Maryland and he's got a lot going on. Don't 147 00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:45,120 Speaker 1: nag him about this. Don't say you used to have joy, 148 00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:47,719 Speaker 1: you used to love the Lord. You're hanging around those 149 00:08:47,760 --> 00:08:50,120 Speaker 1: atheist guys and they're just bringing you down. And I 150 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:53,560 Speaker 1: don't want to go by myself to church. And hey, 151 00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:58,120 Speaker 1: is that stuff not true? No, it's it's true. But 152 00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:00,600 Speaker 1: you don't need to nag him about it. You don't 153 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:05,280 Speaker 1: need to talk in that way. Instead, you love him 154 00:09:06,160 --> 00:09:09,600 Speaker 1: and you forgive him, and you're there for him whenever 155 00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:12,440 Speaker 1: he needs you. You are there for him. That's hard 156 00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:15,040 Speaker 1: to do. It's easy for me to sit here on 157 00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:18,760 Speaker 1: this podcast and say it. It's harder to do. But 158 00:09:18,800 --> 00:09:22,079 Speaker 1: you get up on Sunday morning and you get dressed 159 00:09:22,559 --> 00:09:24,959 Speaker 1: and you say, hey, babe, I'm going to church. Do 160 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,880 Speaker 1: you want to go with me? And he says, no, 161 00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:30,719 Speaker 1: I'm tired, I'm just going to sleep, And you go, okay, 162 00:09:31,559 --> 00:09:33,760 Speaker 1: do you want to meet for lunch when I'm coming home? 163 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:38,520 Speaker 1: And he's like, yeah, I guess You're like Hey, since 164 00:09:38,559 --> 00:09:40,600 Speaker 1: you've been working so hard and you're tired, you want 165 00:09:40,600 --> 00:09:42,120 Speaker 1: me to just pick something up. I can pick some 166 00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:43,800 Speaker 1: lunch on the way. I could pick it up and 167 00:09:43,880 --> 00:09:46,480 Speaker 1: bring it to us. And he's like, yeah, I guess 168 00:09:46,480 --> 00:09:50,160 Speaker 1: I'll take a burger. And you're like okay, and you 169 00:09:50,240 --> 00:09:51,920 Speaker 1: leave it at that, and you get dressed and you 170 00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:53,440 Speaker 1: go and you come back and you get the burger 171 00:09:53,480 --> 00:09:56,560 Speaker 1: and you bring it back home and you go, hear you, babe, 172 00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:58,840 Speaker 1: you're feeling a little bit better. You're still tired. And 173 00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:01,360 Speaker 1: he's like, of course he's got a burger in his hands. 174 00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:03,880 Speaker 1: So he's like, I'm feeling a little better now, You're 175 00:10:03,880 --> 00:10:07,440 Speaker 1: be like good, You're like, man, church was pastor so 176 00:10:07,520 --> 00:10:10,040 Speaker 1: and so it was so good this morning. It was good. 177 00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:13,760 Speaker 1: It was exactly what I needed to hear it. Just ah, 178 00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:15,959 Speaker 1: it just gives me so much peace. It just gives me. 179 00:10:16,280 --> 00:10:19,640 Speaker 1: I just I just feel the presence of God when 180 00:10:19,640 --> 00:10:21,480 Speaker 1: I hear him speak. And it was really good today 181 00:10:22,720 --> 00:10:26,320 Speaker 1: and he's like, yeah, I don't know. And then you 182 00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:30,440 Speaker 1: just leave it at that, over and over and over 183 00:10:30,559 --> 00:10:32,640 Speaker 1: on repeat. This is what you do. And you just 184 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:35,200 Speaker 1: love him and you're just there for him. You just 185 00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:37,720 Speaker 1: forgive him. You don't nag about his friends or who 186 00:10:37,760 --> 00:10:41,199 Speaker 1: he's hanging out with. Now on the outside, you can 187 00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:43,320 Speaker 1: go to others, some other people, and you can go, hey, 188 00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:48,240 Speaker 1: hey pastor hey mister elder or small group leader or whatever, 189 00:10:49,080 --> 00:10:51,600 Speaker 1: my husband's slipping. What can I do? What can I do? 190 00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:54,000 Speaker 1: So you're seeking wise counsel. You're going to like a 191 00:10:54,040 --> 00:10:56,160 Speaker 1: women's group and you're you're part of a small group 192 00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:58,840 Speaker 1: with other women, and you just pour into these women 193 00:10:58,880 --> 00:11:01,000 Speaker 1: and you just tell them ruggling with my husband. And 194 00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:02,920 Speaker 1: someone else in that group is going to go me too, 195 00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:05,959 Speaker 1: same thing, same story, and you go, what do we do? 196 00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:09,800 Speaker 1: And some of the older ladies then go, honey, here's 197 00:11:09,880 --> 00:11:12,520 Speaker 1: what we would recommend. And then you just follow that 198 00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:15,800 Speaker 1: and what should I say to him? And then in 199 00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:18,400 Speaker 1: the meantime, you're coming home, you're bringing food, you're just 200 00:11:18,440 --> 00:11:22,400 Speaker 1: super sweet. Don't let it get to you. You can't 201 00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:24,959 Speaker 1: control him. You can only control how you react. I 202 00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:28,800 Speaker 1: say that all the time on this podcast. Right, Just 203 00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:32,480 Speaker 1: love him, love him, be there for him, don't let 204 00:11:32,480 --> 00:11:36,599 Speaker 1: this eat away at you live it, live out the gospel. 205 00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:40,080 Speaker 1: You think Jesus went out and just drug people around 206 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:42,440 Speaker 1: and said why did you believe? Turn around? Hurry up, 207 00:11:42,480 --> 00:11:45,880 Speaker 1: believe what's wrong with you? He didn't do that, He 208 00:11:46,040 --> 00:11:49,480 Speaker 1: just loved him. Do that. Read your Bible, follow Jesus. 209 00:11:49,600 --> 00:11:56,680 Speaker 1: Do that. That's my answer. Next question, subject Cline says, 210 00:11:56,720 --> 00:11:59,600 Speaker 1: struggling with grief losing my grandpa. Hey, Grandeur, my name 211 00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:03,439 Speaker 1: is Marie. Thanks for your podcast. I thirst listening to them. 212 00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:06,920 Speaker 1: I love that. I've been struggling for years with the 213 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:11,000 Speaker 1: grief of losing my grandpa. I know it doesn't come 214 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:14,080 Speaker 1: close to what you've been through, but maybe you can 215 00:12:14,120 --> 00:12:16,760 Speaker 1: give me some pointers or advice about grieving. Let me stop, 216 00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:20,360 Speaker 1: let me start right there, Marissa, that is not true. 217 00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:24,400 Speaker 1: You cannot relate anybody's grief to each other. Grief is different. 218 00:12:24,640 --> 00:12:29,240 Speaker 1: It's always relative to the life you're living. You loved 219 00:12:29,240 --> 00:12:32,880 Speaker 1: your grandpa a lot. I didn't. I didn't know your 220 00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:36,000 Speaker 1: grandpa at all, so I can't relate at all to 221 00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:39,320 Speaker 1: your grief. You're probably talking about me and River. You 222 00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:41,280 Speaker 1: didn't know River, so you can't relate to that either. 223 00:12:42,040 --> 00:12:44,240 Speaker 1: So we are relative only in our own space, of 224 00:12:44,240 --> 00:12:47,079 Speaker 1: our own lives that we're living in, so we can't compare. 225 00:12:47,679 --> 00:12:49,840 Speaker 1: I don't care if you lost a dog, or a job, 226 00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:52,760 Speaker 1: or a car, or a grandpa or a son, or 227 00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:56,520 Speaker 1: a father or a mother. I don't care. It's relative 228 00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:59,200 Speaker 1: to who you are in your life, in your space, 229 00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:01,439 Speaker 1: and what you know right now. So this is hard 230 00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,880 Speaker 1: for you. Don't downplay that, and don't think that you 231 00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:06,320 Speaker 1: can compare and act like you're less than me. It's 232 00:13:06,360 --> 00:13:10,679 Speaker 1: not true. Okay, let me continue. You said, even though 233 00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:12,400 Speaker 1: I lost him in two thousand and eight, it still 234 00:13:12,480 --> 00:13:15,679 Speaker 1: replays in my head the day that it happened, and 235 00:13:15,760 --> 00:13:18,360 Speaker 1: where it was at that moment, and where I was 236 00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:20,840 Speaker 1: when I found out. He was my best friend. He 237 00:13:20,880 --> 00:13:23,240 Speaker 1: taught me a lot about life and fishing and horses, 238 00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:25,080 Speaker 1: and I talked to God and I asked him why 239 00:13:25,120 --> 00:13:28,319 Speaker 1: did he take him away? And I just struggle with 240 00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:31,040 Speaker 1: him being gone. Your song, that's why I love Dirt 241 00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:33,440 Speaker 1: Roads makes me think of him, and I thank you 242 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:37,040 Speaker 1: for that song. If you can please read this, I'm 243 00:13:37,040 --> 00:13:39,480 Speaker 1: really craving for your advice and the Holy Spirit in 244 00:13:39,559 --> 00:13:44,800 Speaker 1: you and your words. Thank you, Granger Marissa. So I'm sorry. 245 00:13:45,080 --> 00:13:48,600 Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. That's the first thing I could say. 246 00:13:48,840 --> 00:13:53,079 Speaker 1: Grandpa's are tough. Grandpa's are tough to lose because we're 247 00:13:53,080 --> 00:13:56,679 Speaker 1: so close to them. You know something else about Grandpa's 248 00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:03,560 Speaker 1: We're going to lose him. That's like, that's the one 249 00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:06,080 Speaker 1: person in our family that we're most likely to lose. 250 00:14:07,160 --> 00:14:09,560 Speaker 1: I don't know statistics. I'm just guessing, but I'm gonna say, 251 00:14:09,559 --> 00:14:13,120 Speaker 1: if there's anybody in your family, the most likely person 252 00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:16,880 Speaker 1: for everyone that's listening right now to lose or has 253 00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:20,960 Speaker 1: already lost, is Grandpa. That was my first loss. I 254 00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:22,960 Speaker 1: was eight years old when I lost my grandpa on 255 00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:26,600 Speaker 1: my mom's side. It's my first funeral. It was my 256 00:14:26,680 --> 00:14:31,400 Speaker 1: first reality check of mortality and death. And I sat 257 00:14:31,440 --> 00:14:33,880 Speaker 1: next to my mom as she was grieving the loss 258 00:14:33,920 --> 00:14:36,920 Speaker 1: of her dad, and I sat next to my grandma 259 00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:39,440 Speaker 1: who was grieving the loss of her husband. And I 260 00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:42,600 Speaker 1: saw that from the eight year old eyes and it 261 00:14:42,720 --> 00:14:47,640 Speaker 1: affected me. And we're all going to lose Grandpa's. Like 262 00:14:48,160 --> 00:14:51,640 Speaker 1: nobody listening, it's very rare that you would die before 263 00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:54,600 Speaker 1: your grandpa, unless it's unless you die of a young age. 264 00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:59,400 Speaker 1: Right that being said, that doesn't change the grief. Grief 265 00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:02,800 Speaker 1: is equal to the amount of love we have for him. 266 00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:05,600 Speaker 1: So if you loved your grandpa a lot, which it 267 00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:08,320 Speaker 1: sounds like you did, you're gonna miss him, You're gonna 268 00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:11,720 Speaker 1: grieve him, You're gonna mourn for him a lot equal 269 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:14,320 Speaker 1: to the amount of love you had. So the first 270 00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:16,200 Speaker 1: thing to see there and what I just said, the 271 00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:19,280 Speaker 1: way we unpack that, it's like, I'm grieving a lot 272 00:15:19,320 --> 00:15:22,400 Speaker 1: because I loved a lot. So the next question is 273 00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:27,400 Speaker 1: would I rather have not loved so that I would 274 00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:32,920 Speaker 1: not grieve? It's like, of course not, that's ridiculous. There's 275 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,880 Speaker 1: no way I would trade the love I had for 276 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:39,120 Speaker 1: my grandpa just so that I wouldn't grieve. Okay, Well, 277 00:15:39,160 --> 00:15:42,560 Speaker 1: right there, there's a positive thing there, like we already 278 00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:46,680 Speaker 1: realize the love is worth it so much. The love 279 00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:49,240 Speaker 1: you had for him is so valuable to you and 280 00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:53,160 Speaker 1: your life and still will be forever, that it's worth 281 00:15:53,480 --> 00:15:59,200 Speaker 1: the pain of losing him. That's crazy, right, two thousand 282 00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:01,800 Speaker 1: and eight. It's a long time. It's a long time 283 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:05,400 Speaker 1: to still struggle and to sit down and to type 284 00:16:05,440 --> 00:16:09,040 Speaker 1: this email out to me for something that happened, what 285 00:16:09,200 --> 00:16:14,040 Speaker 1: fourteen years ago? So I need you to I need 286 00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:20,400 Speaker 1: you to think about this. You obviously loved him a lot, Okay, 287 00:16:21,560 --> 00:16:24,400 Speaker 1: at this point in your grieving, if this was six months, 288 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:27,800 Speaker 1: this is a different conversation fourteen years. Here's the deal. 289 00:16:28,920 --> 00:16:31,080 Speaker 1: You're gonna have to start taking the things that make 290 00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:33,480 Speaker 1: you sad, like the day that had happened and where 291 00:16:33,520 --> 00:16:35,800 Speaker 1: you were when you found out. You're going to have 292 00:16:35,840 --> 00:16:39,160 Speaker 1: to start using these things to your advantage, and you're 293 00:16:39,160 --> 00:16:42,320 Speaker 1: gonna have to start finding all the good things about 294 00:16:42,360 --> 00:16:45,200 Speaker 1: him that still live on. For instance, you said some 295 00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:48,200 Speaker 1: of it in your email. He taught you to fish, 296 00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:52,960 Speaker 1: He taught you about horses, about life. So now every 297 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:55,800 Speaker 1: time you get around a horse, you have this little 298 00:16:55,840 --> 00:17:00,400 Speaker 1: bit of gratefulness that's like, huh, thank you grandpa. This 299 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:02,800 Speaker 1: every time you get that fishing pole in your hand 300 00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:05,600 Speaker 1: and you cast out into the water and that lure 301 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:09,560 Speaker 1: hits the water and bounces off and sinks, ripples come out, 302 00:17:09,920 --> 00:17:14,520 Speaker 1: big bass comes and hits it, you think, thank you, Grandpa, 303 00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:17,000 Speaker 1: you taught me how to do this, and you smile. 304 00:17:18,040 --> 00:17:20,720 Speaker 1: You smile about it. You're not sad about it. You're like, oh, man, 305 00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:23,560 Speaker 1: I lost him. I I don't have them anymore. It's 306 00:17:23,560 --> 00:17:28,960 Speaker 1: like you still do because you're fishing, and that extends 307 00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:32,040 Speaker 1: his life with you in your heart because you're fishing 308 00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:35,080 Speaker 1: and you're doing that with him. Because he taught you that, 309 00:17:36,520 --> 00:17:38,679 Speaker 1: and then you smile and you're like, man, I'm so 310 00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:41,920 Speaker 1: I'm so blessed that I had a grandpa that top 311 00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:44,280 Speaker 1: me a fish because I know a lot of people 312 00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:46,520 Speaker 1: and I do personally, and you do too. I'm sure 313 00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:51,800 Speaker 1: Marissa that didn't have a grandpa in this way. My 314 00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:57,800 Speaker 1: kids good example. My dad died in twenty fourteen. London 315 00:17:57,960 --> 00:18:04,400 Speaker 1: was two and Lincoln was a newborn. River and Maverick, 316 00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:09,160 Speaker 1: my other two sons, never knew their papa. My dad. 317 00:18:09,440 --> 00:18:13,520 Speaker 1: My dad would have been such a good grandpa. He 318 00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:16,119 Speaker 1: would have been so good at teaching him how to fish, 319 00:18:16,320 --> 00:18:18,440 Speaker 1: teaching him how to drive a truck on a dirt road, 320 00:18:18,840 --> 00:18:22,240 Speaker 1: teaching them about animals and cows and deer and horses. 321 00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:25,439 Speaker 1: He would have been so good with that stuff. But 322 00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:29,560 Speaker 1: they never got it because they never knew him. They 323 00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:32,400 Speaker 1: never loved him in that way, so they don't grieve 324 00:18:32,480 --> 00:18:36,359 Speaker 1: him at all. Would you rather trade with them? Would 325 00:18:36,359 --> 00:18:39,280 Speaker 1: you rather trade places with my kids and go, well, 326 00:18:39,280 --> 00:18:40,760 Speaker 1: I never had a grandpa. I don't even know what 327 00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:44,920 Speaker 1: it's like. Or would you rather say, Man, I miss 328 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,560 Speaker 1: my grandpa every day, but I'm so blessed to have 329 00:18:48,680 --> 00:18:52,000 Speaker 1: had him. Because he loved me and I loved him, 330 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:54,200 Speaker 1: and he taught me so much stuff that I still 331 00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:58,360 Speaker 1: have today. And now when you teach somebody how to fish, 332 00:18:58,800 --> 00:19:03,840 Speaker 1: guess who's teaching that persons Your grandpa and most likely 333 00:19:04,480 --> 00:19:07,720 Speaker 1: his daddy or his grandpa taught him, and it just 334 00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:10,920 Speaker 1: passes down in that way. You are so blessed. Think 335 00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:15,439 Speaker 1: of it that way. It's not a tragedy. Nothing in 336 00:19:15,480 --> 00:19:19,600 Speaker 1: life is a tragedy. It's all purposed. God purposes everything. 337 00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:24,120 Speaker 1: Use that. Realize that it's not meaningless. It's not an accident. 338 00:19:24,119 --> 00:19:28,000 Speaker 1: It's not a tragedy. It's something you're using. It's preparing 339 00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:33,160 Speaker 1: you for something. What is it? Listen to my words, Marissa, 340 00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:38,920 Speaker 1: this is your road to healing. Just take a break 341 00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:46,399 Speaker 1: and bear it back. Thanks for listening to the podcast. 342 00:19:46,400 --> 00:19:47,919 Speaker 1: A few things I want to tell you. First of all, 343 00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:50,359 Speaker 1: if you want to meet me, you could always find 344 00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:53,760 Speaker 1: my tour dates hopefully coming close to you at grangersmith 345 00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:57,119 Speaker 1: dot com. Click on the tab meet granger If we 346 00:19:57,200 --> 00:19:59,320 Speaker 1: don't have that many more tour dates this year, so 347 00:19:59,359 --> 00:20:01,520 Speaker 1: I'd love to see at one of them. Second of all, 348 00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:03,600 Speaker 1: you could always get a hold of me at Cameo 349 00:20:03,720 --> 00:20:06,600 Speaker 1: dot com slash Grangersmith. That's how you can get a 350 00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:10,560 Speaker 1: video announcement from me of some sort telling you happy 351 00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:13,800 Speaker 1: birthday or happy anniversary, or maybe some pep talk for 352 00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:15,879 Speaker 1: you or anyone else that you want to send it to. 353 00:20:16,000 --> 00:20:17,960 Speaker 1: Holidays is a great time to do this. You could 354 00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:22,239 Speaker 1: also download the cameo app at came eo and then 355 00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:25,159 Speaker 1: search for me Granger Smith. It's super easy. I do 356 00:20:25,240 --> 00:20:27,840 Speaker 1: these every day. I'll make a video message for you 357 00:20:28,080 --> 00:20:31,320 Speaker 1: or whoever you want me to. Finally, the ee Apparel 358 00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:34,800 Speaker 1: Fall launch comes out September the thirtieth. I just did 359 00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:37,359 Speaker 1: a photoshoot for this yesterday and I love all the 360 00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:42,080 Speaker 1: new stuff. New coats, jackets, long sleeve tees, short sleeve tees, hoodies, 361 00:20:42,160 --> 00:20:44,879 Speaker 1: and caps all ready for you. Go to yee ye 362 00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:47,719 Speaker 1: dot com. Make sure you log in at ten am 363 00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:50,200 Speaker 1: Central because you don't want your favorite sizes to be 364 00:20:50,280 --> 00:20:57,320 Speaker 1: sold out. Back to the podcast. If you want to 365 00:20:57,320 --> 00:21:01,920 Speaker 1: email me, email granger Smith popc Cast at gmail dot com, 366 00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:05,639 Speaker 1: Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. And the next question, 367 00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:08,520 Speaker 1: sebjict Line says could use your advice. Hey Granger, my 368 00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:11,240 Speaker 1: name is Brittany. I'm thirty five years old. I've never 369 00:21:11,320 --> 00:21:14,119 Speaker 1: had a boyfriend. It hit me hard this year that 370 00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:16,640 Speaker 1: I may never have a chance to be a mom. 371 00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:19,760 Speaker 1: I would love to find someone to love and possibly 372 00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:22,600 Speaker 1: have a family with, but unfortunately my time to have 373 00:21:22,720 --> 00:21:25,200 Speaker 1: kids is getting closer to the end and I don't 374 00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:28,159 Speaker 1: have anyone in my life. I ask God daily if 375 00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:30,919 Speaker 1: I'm meant to have a family or not. I just 376 00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:33,600 Speaker 1: don't know where to find somebody. My life consists of work. 377 00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:37,720 Speaker 1: I'm a medical assistant Jim and the Park. I love 378 00:21:37,760 --> 00:21:41,000 Speaker 1: listening to your podcast while working. I do go to 379 00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:44,199 Speaker 1: many concerts each year, about thirty this year alone. I 380 00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:47,879 Speaker 1: love music, but I haven't found anyone. Would love to 381 00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:50,919 Speaker 1: get your thoughts. You give really good advice. Some of 382 00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:55,120 Speaker 1: your advice has hit me close to home. Thanks Brittany 383 00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:58,640 Speaker 1: from Gray, Tennessee. PS. I've had the pleasure of seeing 384 00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:01,880 Speaker 1: you twice in concert. First was in twenty sixteen and 385 00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:04,280 Speaker 1: last year at Bristol Motor Speedway. Hope to see you 386 00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:07,320 Speaker 1: in concert again. And then she puts a picture here 387 00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:13,760 Speaker 1: of me and her. I love that. Thank you. I 388 00:22:13,840 --> 00:22:15,719 Speaker 1: love to see a picture with this. It helps me, 389 00:22:16,080 --> 00:22:19,240 Speaker 1: helps you. I remember you Brittany very well, so thank 390 00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:21,600 Speaker 1: you for doing that. And thanks for your email. I 391 00:22:21,680 --> 00:22:26,720 Speaker 1: think I think your email is very sincere and very 392 00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:34,720 Speaker 1: heartfelt and very understandable. You are not alone. Man. How 393 00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:38,119 Speaker 1: many times could I say that? It probably feels like 394 00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:42,040 Speaker 1: you're looking at your clock and you're going, I'm thirty five, 395 00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:46,439 Speaker 1: I'm alone. I don't know anyone else that's alone at 396 00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:49,879 Speaker 1: thirty five. That's what you're thinking. Right everywhere I look, 397 00:22:50,359 --> 00:22:54,800 Speaker 1: someone has somebody that they love and they have kids, 398 00:22:55,359 --> 00:22:57,440 Speaker 1: and my clock is ticking it and I might run 399 00:22:57,480 --> 00:23:00,960 Speaker 1: out of time, and I'm the only one, and I'm 400 00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:04,320 Speaker 1: here to tell you first and foremost, you're not alone. 401 00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:08,800 Speaker 1: I know that because I see them. I know that 402 00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:10,960 Speaker 1: because of all the emails I get to this podcast. 403 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:14,280 Speaker 1: I get thousands of emails, y'all. I see all different scenarios. 404 00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:19,240 Speaker 1: I see yours, Brittany, your scenario, your age, your same questions. 405 00:23:20,200 --> 00:23:23,520 Speaker 1: I also see people your age that are divorced three 406 00:23:23,560 --> 00:23:27,200 Speaker 1: times and they're battling custody with the kids, or they're 407 00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:30,480 Speaker 1: paying child support, or they're in a rough, abusive, emotionally 408 00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:34,879 Speaker 1: disturbing marriage of some sort, or they're locked in a 409 00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:37,520 Speaker 1: relationship where there's no love and they don't know what 410 00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:39,720 Speaker 1: to do. And they feel lost, and they too feel 411 00:23:39,760 --> 00:23:44,800 Speaker 1: like they're the only ones. Part of the reason I 412 00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:47,639 Speaker 1: tell you this, Brittany, is because a big piece of 413 00:23:47,640 --> 00:23:52,200 Speaker 1: what I want to tell you is be still, Be still, wait, 414 00:23:53,359 --> 00:23:58,879 Speaker 1: wait for the Lord. Because you're in a pretty good situation. 415 00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:01,800 Speaker 1: And you don't think you are, but I'm telling you, 416 00:24:01,880 --> 00:24:04,159 Speaker 1: and I'm looking at your picture, you're in a really 417 00:24:04,560 --> 00:24:08,080 Speaker 1: good place because you have no ties. You have a 418 00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:12,399 Speaker 1: clean slate. You just turn the chapter to your book 419 00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:14,600 Speaker 1: and there's nothing on the page jet it's waiting to 420 00:24:14,680 --> 00:24:18,879 Speaker 1: be written. You don't have tons of ghosts in the 421 00:24:18,880 --> 00:24:23,359 Speaker 1: closet skeletons, you don't have tons of baggage, you don't 422 00:24:23,359 --> 00:24:26,359 Speaker 1: have some You don't have a husband that's at home 423 00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:29,680 Speaker 1: that's an atheist. Now, like the first question I read, 424 00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:34,080 Speaker 1: you don't have to worry about counseling or problems with 425 00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:38,679 Speaker 1: kids and a father that's abusive to them. You have 426 00:24:38,720 --> 00:24:42,679 Speaker 1: none of that. All you have right now is time 427 00:24:43,640 --> 00:24:48,479 Speaker 1: to wait. You. Let me say this really clearly. You 428 00:24:49,240 --> 00:24:55,600 Speaker 1: are not too old to find love. You are not 429 00:24:56,240 --> 00:25:01,960 Speaker 1: too old to have a baby. If it does happen, 430 00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:08,560 Speaker 1: God willing, it could happen fast. You could meet someone 431 00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:13,320 Speaker 1: today you can get engaged in six months, you could 432 00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:18,000 Speaker 1: be pregnant in eight months. You could have a baby 433 00:25:18,080 --> 00:25:21,960 Speaker 1: next year. I'm saying it could happen that fast. And 434 00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:23,679 Speaker 1: then you have a baby in you're thirty six, and 435 00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:27,160 Speaker 1: it's like, why was I even worried? God, Like, why 436 00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:31,439 Speaker 1: why did they question? You were setting this up for me. 437 00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:34,040 Speaker 1: You were setting You're giving me space so that the 438 00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:37,600 Speaker 1: perfect man could come at the perfect time and everything 439 00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:40,520 Speaker 1: aligned just right. And then you look back and you go, God, Lee, 440 00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:44,680 Speaker 1: I questioned this, and this is this is exactly where 441 00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:47,280 Speaker 1: I need to be now. And I can't believe I 442 00:25:47,359 --> 00:25:50,040 Speaker 1: questioned it. I can't believe I even wrote an email 443 00:25:50,119 --> 00:25:52,840 Speaker 1: to Granger Smith and you write it on this podcast, 444 00:25:53,480 --> 00:25:56,200 Speaker 1: and I'm looking back in hindsight, I was exactly where 445 00:25:56,200 --> 00:26:00,960 Speaker 1: I need it to be. You're you're a beautiful girl, 446 00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:07,160 Speaker 1: you have passions, you love music. Strategically, this is where 447 00:26:07,160 --> 00:26:11,600 Speaker 1: I would go. I'd go to church. What a great 448 00:26:11,640 --> 00:26:14,399 Speaker 1: place to meet a guy. You're going in the house 449 00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:17,800 Speaker 1: of God. You're meeting someone that's just chasing after Christ. 450 00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:20,600 Speaker 1: I've got a brother. I'm just saying I got a brother, 451 00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:24,800 Speaker 1: and he's thirty nine and he's single. Okay, there's many 452 00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:28,080 Speaker 1: people like that out there. So you go to church 453 00:26:28,119 --> 00:26:31,000 Speaker 1: and you're just like, God, I'm gonna glorify you. I'm 454 00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:34,919 Speaker 1: gonna praise you. I'm gonna praise you in my singleness 455 00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:38,399 Speaker 1: right now. I'm gonna praise you that you have protected 456 00:26:38,400 --> 00:26:41,679 Speaker 1: me and kept me single. I don't know the reason, 457 00:26:42,359 --> 00:26:45,520 Speaker 1: and I'm not gonna ask you. You ever think about this. 458 00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:50,040 Speaker 1: God has a planning, He's purposed everything, he has aligned everything. 459 00:26:50,080 --> 00:26:52,800 Speaker 1: It's like this. It's like, have you ever seen in 460 00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:55,960 Speaker 1: Europe or somewhere where they have mosaics where it's like 461 00:26:56,040 --> 00:26:59,400 Speaker 1: little tiny pieces of tile and they're all different colors, 462 00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:04,119 Speaker 1: and they're random, thousands of them, and you put them together. 463 00:27:04,160 --> 00:27:06,719 Speaker 1: And you put all these tiny pieces of tile together 464 00:27:07,240 --> 00:27:09,760 Speaker 1: and you start attaching them here, and it doesn't look 465 00:27:09,800 --> 00:27:12,879 Speaker 1: like anything but a blob of color. And then you 466 00:27:13,040 --> 00:27:16,399 Speaker 1: climb up on like a ladder, six foot ladder, and 467 00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:19,560 Speaker 1: you look down at the mosaic of what you've been doing, 468 00:27:20,280 --> 00:27:25,359 Speaker 1: and there's this beautiful painting, this beautiful image of this 469 00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:30,280 Speaker 1: great piece of perfect art, and you go, ah, that's 470 00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:33,160 Speaker 1: what this was. I was just I was just down 471 00:27:33,200 --> 00:27:35,040 Speaker 1: here and looking at these tiny pieces of tile, and 472 00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:39,040 Speaker 1: it looked like nothing. It looked worthless to me. But 473 00:27:39,080 --> 00:27:40,359 Speaker 1: now I got up here on this ladder and I 474 00:27:40,400 --> 00:27:43,960 Speaker 1: looked down and this this beautiful piece of art. That's 475 00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:49,240 Speaker 1: what my life was. Yes, you're down there on the tile, 476 00:27:50,359 --> 00:27:53,440 Speaker 1: and that's okay. That's where. That's all we can handle. 477 00:27:54,040 --> 00:27:56,399 Speaker 1: The only thing we can handle is being on the 478 00:27:56,440 --> 00:27:58,919 Speaker 1: ground with the tiny tiles, because if we got up 479 00:27:58,920 --> 00:28:00,959 Speaker 1: on the ladder and we saw all the full picture 480 00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:03,560 Speaker 1: of what's going on, we would start planning things out 481 00:28:03,560 --> 00:28:05,920 Speaker 1: on our own and be like, oh, that's where we're going. 482 00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:08,200 Speaker 1: There's is gonna be a mountain scene with a sunset 483 00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:11,000 Speaker 1: and a river and beautiful trees. Okay, then I'm gonna 484 00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:13,520 Speaker 1: start working on the clouds. And God's like, I don't 485 00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:17,040 Speaker 1: want you on the clouds. You're working on the trees. 486 00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:21,080 Speaker 1: Keep working on the green tiles. I'll get you to 487 00:28:21,119 --> 00:28:23,440 Speaker 1: the blue when you need to get to the blue. 488 00:28:25,640 --> 00:28:27,600 Speaker 1: So you go to God and you go God, I 489 00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:30,880 Speaker 1: know I've been asking you daily, like you said, I've 490 00:28:30,880 --> 00:28:32,800 Speaker 1: been asking you daily if I'm meant to have a 491 00:28:32,800 --> 00:28:34,879 Speaker 1: family or not. God. I'm just want to know am 492 00:28:34,920 --> 00:28:36,480 Speaker 1: I gonna have a family or not. I've been asking 493 00:28:36,520 --> 00:28:40,120 Speaker 1: you this every single day. Change it, change the prayer. 494 00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:44,520 Speaker 1: So now it's like God, you have a plant, you 495 00:28:44,560 --> 00:28:49,720 Speaker 1: have a purpose. I was wonderfully made for your purpose, 496 00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:53,120 Speaker 1: and so I'm gonna trust that purpose. Now, you know 497 00:28:53,240 --> 00:28:55,680 Speaker 1: my heart. You know my desire is to be a 498 00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:58,640 Speaker 1: mother and to have someone that I love and cherish 499 00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:01,360 Speaker 1: as a husband. But I'm not gonna ask you for that. 500 00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:04,360 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna keep serving you and praising you for 501 00:29:04,600 --> 00:29:06,360 Speaker 1: the work that you're doing in my life because I 502 00:29:06,360 --> 00:29:08,320 Speaker 1: don't know what it is. And You're a lamp to 503 00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:11,520 Speaker 1: my feet, meaning I get step by step, I get 504 00:29:11,600 --> 00:29:15,440 Speaker 1: the light every step, but don't shine the light too 505 00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:17,880 Speaker 1: right ahead of me, because I'll start making plans and 506 00:29:17,880 --> 00:29:21,280 Speaker 1: I'll screw them up. So I'm gonna trust you, God, 507 00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:23,320 Speaker 1: you know my heart. But I'm just gonna trust you. 508 00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:28,280 Speaker 1: I'm gonna be still. I'm gonna wait for you. And so, Brittany, 509 00:29:28,280 --> 00:29:30,840 Speaker 1: I would go to church. I would go to church, 510 00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:33,760 Speaker 1: and I would I would get involved in groups there, 511 00:29:34,680 --> 00:29:36,360 Speaker 1: not just Sunday morning and you come in and you 512 00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:37,880 Speaker 1: and you go out and you sit in the back 513 00:29:37,920 --> 00:29:40,920 Speaker 1: row and you come out. I'm talking about front row church, 514 00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:43,840 Speaker 1: and I'm talking about, Hey, well, how can I get involved? 515 00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:47,240 Speaker 1: How do we serve? Are we serving? Like, actually, we 516 00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:50,960 Speaker 1: serve every other Saturday. We serve the community. We go 517 00:29:51,040 --> 00:29:54,120 Speaker 1: out and we feed or we we repair houses or 518 00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:58,040 Speaker 1: we fix broken limbs. But we do that every other Saturday. Brittany, 519 00:29:58,080 --> 00:29:59,960 Speaker 1: That's what they're telling you. And you're like, cool, sign 520 00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:02,000 Speaker 1: me up. And they're like, okay, we'll see you at 521 00:30:02,040 --> 00:30:04,000 Speaker 1: noon on Saturday, and we're gonna give you a T 522 00:30:04,120 --> 00:30:06,280 Speaker 1: shirt and you just show up at this location. So 523 00:30:06,360 --> 00:30:09,320 Speaker 1: you show up and you're like, okay, God, I'm serving you. 524 00:30:10,080 --> 00:30:13,120 Speaker 1: I'm doing this for you. God, I'm pouring into you, right, 525 00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:17,720 Speaker 1: And then you do this Saturday after Saturday after Saturday, 526 00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:19,200 Speaker 1: and then you're like, hey, what else could I do? 527 00:30:19,360 --> 00:30:21,520 Speaker 1: They're like, well, we have a women's small group. The 528 00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:24,400 Speaker 1: women's group meets on Friday mornings at seven am. You're like, 529 00:30:24,440 --> 00:30:26,400 Speaker 1: sign me up and cool, we gotta we got a 530 00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:28,640 Speaker 1: space at a table for you. So you show up. 531 00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:33,200 Speaker 1: You're like, here, I am showing up. I'm content, i'm single, 532 00:30:33,360 --> 00:30:36,600 Speaker 1: I'm trusting, and I'm showing up and you're like, what 533 00:30:36,640 --> 00:30:38,760 Speaker 1: else could I do? And they're like, well, we got 534 00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:43,640 Speaker 1: a mission trip to Mexico. It's next June. We're gonna 535 00:30:43,640 --> 00:30:45,600 Speaker 1: go there and we're gonna help this community. We're gonna 536 00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:47,840 Speaker 1: help a local church there. And you're like, sign me up, 537 00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:51,320 Speaker 1: and you show up again. You got you gotta back 538 00:30:51,320 --> 00:30:53,080 Speaker 1: off a few of the concerts. I know that might 539 00:30:53,120 --> 00:30:55,800 Speaker 1: be tough, but give give a few of the concerts 540 00:30:55,800 --> 00:30:58,840 Speaker 1: a break. Then you go to Mexico and you show 541 00:30:58,920 --> 00:31:01,680 Speaker 1: up and you're like, here, I am God, I'm yours. 542 00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:05,560 Speaker 1: I'm not gonna ask you questions. I'm not gonna wonder. 543 00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:08,280 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna trust and I'm gonna show up and 544 00:31:08,280 --> 00:31:12,440 Speaker 1: I'm gonna serve. And then you go back home from 545 00:31:12,480 --> 00:31:14,920 Speaker 1: Mexico and you go to your small group and you 546 00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:17,480 Speaker 1: come back home, and then on Saturday, this new guy 547 00:31:17,520 --> 00:31:22,200 Speaker 1: shows up. Just moved to town, thirty eight years old, 548 00:31:22,840 --> 00:31:28,320 Speaker 1: handsome guy, and he's like, hey, I just moved, but 549 00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:30,440 Speaker 1: I wanted to be part of this church and I 550 00:31:30,440 --> 00:31:33,200 Speaker 1: want to serve. I got a heart for God. And 551 00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:34,840 Speaker 1: so I showed up here at noon and they gave 552 00:31:34,880 --> 00:31:37,200 Speaker 1: me a T shirt. But I don't know anything about 553 00:31:37,240 --> 00:31:39,479 Speaker 1: this town. And you're like, well, I'm Brittany, and I 554 00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:40,959 Speaker 1: do know a lot about this town. And I've been 555 00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:42,880 Speaker 1: serving at the church for a couple of years now, 556 00:31:43,640 --> 00:31:46,360 Speaker 1: and I could show you and then your heart starts 557 00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:48,320 Speaker 1: beating and you're like, Hey, God, what are you doing? 558 00:31:48,440 --> 00:31:53,040 Speaker 1: What are you doing? And God's like, just wait for me. 559 00:31:54,520 --> 00:31:58,160 Speaker 1: Now that's a hypothetical situation here, but I'm just saying, Brittany, 560 00:31:58,640 --> 00:32:00,920 Speaker 1: this is the kind of stuff I could see happening 561 00:32:00,960 --> 00:32:03,680 Speaker 1: to you. And then you're gonna email me back. In fact, 562 00:32:03,840 --> 00:32:06,720 Speaker 1: do this. I'm gonna call it right now. I want 563 00:32:06,760 --> 00:32:08,520 Speaker 1: you to do what I said, and I want you 564 00:32:08,600 --> 00:32:10,560 Speaker 1: to have a heart like I mentioned, and I want 565 00:32:10,600 --> 00:32:12,959 Speaker 1: you to email me back and say, Granger, guess what, 566 00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:15,760 Speaker 1: I've found this guy. And then you send me a 567 00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:17,120 Speaker 1: picture of that, don't send me a picture of me, 568 00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:19,200 Speaker 1: and you again, send a picture of you and the guy. 569 00:32:20,920 --> 00:32:23,480 Speaker 1: And then eight months down the road, you send me 570 00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:26,360 Speaker 1: a picture of that little pregnancy test that says positive. Okay, 571 00:32:26,720 --> 00:32:32,000 Speaker 1: just saying I'm pouring that into you right now. Next question, 572 00:32:33,320 --> 00:32:38,000 Speaker 1: I'm all worked up. Subjecline here says thanks for all 573 00:32:38,040 --> 00:32:41,040 Speaker 1: you do. Hey, this is Harrison. I emailed you a 574 00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:43,080 Speaker 1: while back about a friend. I took the advice you 575 00:32:43,160 --> 00:32:46,719 Speaker 1: gave me. It's definitely been a huge help. Another thing 576 00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:49,840 Speaker 1: I'm struggling with is the same friend is not Christian 577 00:32:49,920 --> 00:32:53,200 Speaker 1: anymore used to be though side note, I am a Christian. 578 00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:55,800 Speaker 1: The thing I'm struggling with is whenever I hang out 579 00:32:55,800 --> 00:32:58,760 Speaker 1: with him or talk with him, or find myself find 580 00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:03,160 Speaker 1: myself doing stuff that's not glorifying God, with him talking 581 00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:06,840 Speaker 1: bad about people, swearing, etc. How do I best go 582 00:33:06,880 --> 00:33:09,600 Speaker 1: about telling him that I'm trying to strengthen my walk 583 00:33:09,640 --> 00:33:12,880 Speaker 1: with God, but he's hindering it being a bad friend. 584 00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:17,320 Speaker 1: Meaning I'm just not I'm just not very good to 585 00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:19,880 Speaker 1: hang out with him because he is now the opposite 586 00:33:19,920 --> 00:33:24,000 Speaker 1: of a Christian pretty much. He's been a longtime friend. 587 00:33:24,280 --> 00:33:27,520 Speaker 1: It's just really hard. What are your thoughts, Harrison, Buddy, 588 00:33:27,560 --> 00:33:33,480 Speaker 1: thanks for emailing, Thanks for emailing again. And here's the deal, dude, 589 00:33:33,640 --> 00:33:37,880 Speaker 1: if you're struggling, like if this is a problem for you, 590 00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:41,880 Speaker 1: if you are wavering in your faith and it's creating 591 00:33:41,880 --> 00:33:47,040 Speaker 1: a problem, you have to cut this guy off lovingly, 592 00:33:48,200 --> 00:33:50,920 Speaker 1: and you've got to do it in a way where 593 00:33:50,960 --> 00:33:58,479 Speaker 1: you're like, hey, buddy, I need I need some space 594 00:33:58,560 --> 00:34:01,000 Speaker 1: because I'm not in a good place right now, and 595 00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:03,200 Speaker 1: I know this is hard to understand. I need you 596 00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:06,440 Speaker 1: to know that I respect you as a friend and 597 00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:10,360 Speaker 1: we've been friends for a long time. But I'm really 598 00:34:10,800 --> 00:34:15,680 Speaker 1: trying to better myself and I need I need to 599 00:34:15,719 --> 00:34:19,319 Speaker 1: find a new routine. And he's gonna take this pretty bad. 600 00:34:19,400 --> 00:34:22,040 Speaker 1: I mean, there's really no way to say that without 601 00:34:22,080 --> 00:34:25,120 Speaker 1: him getting offended. But guess what the best thing for 602 00:34:25,239 --> 00:34:33,279 Speaker 1: him to be is right now offended by you. He's 603 00:34:33,280 --> 00:34:36,239 Speaker 1: heading down a bad path, you're saying yourself. He's a 604 00:34:36,239 --> 00:34:39,440 Speaker 1: bad influence on you. Understandable. That's what happens when we 605 00:34:39,480 --> 00:34:42,920 Speaker 1: get around bad influences. It starts wearing off. That's what 606 00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:45,640 Speaker 1: we do as humans. When we collect in groups and tribes, 607 00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:49,080 Speaker 1: we start becoming the core of the tribe. We start 608 00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:52,720 Speaker 1: dressing alike and talking alike, and watching the same movies 609 00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:55,560 Speaker 1: and acting the same way. That's what we do as people. 610 00:34:55,640 --> 00:34:58,319 Speaker 1: So it's not a surprise that you're saying it. So 611 00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:00,839 Speaker 1: you got to cut it off. And guess what the 612 00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:04,399 Speaker 1: best thing for him is His good buddy that he's 613 00:35:04,400 --> 00:35:07,880 Speaker 1: known forever is cutting him off because his good buddy 614 00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:12,680 Speaker 1: needs to better himself and be closer with God. So 615 00:35:12,800 --> 00:35:16,360 Speaker 1: that's going to leave him going what man, but we 616 00:35:16,400 --> 00:35:19,880 Speaker 1: had so much fun, and he's going to start questioning, like, mate, 617 00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:22,360 Speaker 1: if he's if he's doing that, maybe I should be 618 00:35:22,440 --> 00:35:25,080 Speaker 1: doing that, like what's wrong with me? And all these 619 00:35:25,160 --> 00:35:27,960 Speaker 1: questions start kicking up, and that's really good for him. 620 00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:32,319 Speaker 1: It's also really good for you. So that's my suggestion. Man, 621 00:35:33,480 --> 00:35:37,200 Speaker 1: you gotta cut it off, not forever, but right now, 622 00:35:37,440 --> 00:35:40,239 Speaker 1: until you get stronger in your faith, until you could 623 00:35:40,239 --> 00:35:42,680 Speaker 1: speak up, until you could be convicted enough to not 624 00:35:42,800 --> 00:35:45,000 Speaker 1: speak the way that he does, to not do what 625 00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:48,080 Speaker 1: he does, to not follow him into these dark corners 626 00:35:48,080 --> 00:35:50,480 Speaker 1: that he's going, until you could have enough strength to 627 00:35:50,560 --> 00:35:54,080 Speaker 1: go Nope, not laughing at that joke. Nope, not going 628 00:35:54,120 --> 00:35:58,080 Speaker 1: down that dark alley with you. Until you're there and 629 00:35:58,080 --> 00:36:00,279 Speaker 1: it sounds like you're not yet, which is okay. Then 630 00:36:00,320 --> 00:36:06,360 Speaker 1: you just go, hey, man, I got plans Friday. I'm sorry. 631 00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:11,360 Speaker 1: It's tough love. That's what you got to do. Next question, 632 00:36:11,760 --> 00:36:14,200 Speaker 1: no subject here, says Hey Granger, hope your day's going well. 633 00:36:14,239 --> 00:36:16,560 Speaker 1: I'd like to stay anonymous. I'm in a bit of 634 00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:19,480 Speaker 1: a slump. My dad and I have a farm. Our 635 00:36:19,520 --> 00:36:23,719 Speaker 1: farm consists of a small feed lot, grain farming and 636 00:36:23,760 --> 00:36:28,400 Speaker 1: haying and a few cow calf pairs. We can't seem 637 00:36:28,440 --> 00:36:30,600 Speaker 1: to get everything done, and my dad is getting a 638 00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:33,520 Speaker 1: little older. He's in his mid sixties. Don't get me wrong, 639 00:36:33,560 --> 00:36:36,000 Speaker 1: I love my dad, but it seems like he isn't 640 00:36:36,080 --> 00:36:40,280 Speaker 1: open to hiring anybody to help or trying any different 641 00:36:40,320 --> 00:36:43,839 Speaker 1: ways of doing things to make this farm work better financially. 642 00:36:44,080 --> 00:36:48,160 Speaker 1: What are your thoughts or ideas? Yeah, Anonymous, thanks for 643 00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:51,920 Speaker 1: the email, man, And I actually read this email on 644 00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:56,040 Speaker 1: after midnight a few days ago, and I think it's 645 00:36:56,040 --> 00:36:57,680 Speaker 1: a good email, and I think it's a great question. 646 00:36:57,760 --> 00:36:59,160 Speaker 1: And this is what I would say to you, brother 647 00:37:00,320 --> 00:37:05,359 Speaker 1: number one. It's your dad's farm. I know that's tough 648 00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:08,080 Speaker 1: to hear, but it's it's his farm. It's his way. 649 00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:11,600 Speaker 1: One day, God willing, this will be your farm, or 650 00:37:11,600 --> 00:37:15,399 Speaker 1: you'll have another farm, But right now it's not. It's 651 00:37:15,440 --> 00:37:19,560 Speaker 1: your dad's. So I can understand why you're you want 652 00:37:19,600 --> 00:37:21,680 Speaker 1: to You know, you have this hustle mentality and you 653 00:37:21,680 --> 00:37:23,759 Speaker 1: want to just grow this farm and make it make 654 00:37:23,800 --> 00:37:26,759 Speaker 1: it huge financially and fix all these loose ends. And 655 00:37:26,800 --> 00:37:29,160 Speaker 1: your Dad's like, that's not the way I do it. 656 00:37:30,280 --> 00:37:34,520 Speaker 1: And you have to respect and honor him for what 657 00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:38,000 Speaker 1: he wants to do for his farm and one day 658 00:37:38,480 --> 00:37:42,799 Speaker 1: you could do it your way. So right now you 659 00:37:42,840 --> 00:37:46,239 Speaker 1: could have open conversation with him and you could say, Dad, 660 00:37:46,400 --> 00:37:49,040 Speaker 1: could I suggest some things? Now here's the key, The 661 00:37:49,120 --> 00:37:52,160 Speaker 1: key to this whole thing is when you have suggestions, 662 00:37:52,200 --> 00:37:54,640 Speaker 1: you have a different way of going about this farm. 663 00:37:56,040 --> 00:37:58,759 Speaker 1: You can't just bring this idea to him so that 664 00:37:58,800 --> 00:38:01,600 Speaker 1: you guys can implement it. You have to start and 665 00:38:01,719 --> 00:38:06,200 Speaker 1: involve him from the get go. What I mean by 666 00:38:06,200 --> 00:38:09,040 Speaker 1: that is he has to own it with you. He 667 00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:13,000 Speaker 1: has to own the new idea. So it's open communication. 668 00:38:13,080 --> 00:38:16,880 Speaker 1: It's like, Dad, do you recognize that this is a 669 00:38:16,960 --> 00:38:20,920 Speaker 1: problem this? And he's like I don't really see that 670 00:38:20,920 --> 00:38:24,879 Speaker 1: as a problem. And you're like, well, let me show 671 00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:27,160 Speaker 1: you some examples of other farms that could do it 672 00:38:27,560 --> 00:38:30,279 Speaker 1: this way. But we need to figure out and maybe 673 00:38:30,280 --> 00:38:32,839 Speaker 1: you know the way right, but you go, I need 674 00:38:32,880 --> 00:38:35,000 Speaker 1: to figure out a way to get from A to B. 675 00:38:35,719 --> 00:38:38,040 Speaker 1: And you already have the answer, but you're not saying 676 00:38:38,080 --> 00:38:41,120 Speaker 1: it yet because because you don't want to own it yourself. 677 00:38:41,520 --> 00:38:44,239 Speaker 1: So you're saying, Dad, I would love to get from 678 00:38:44,320 --> 00:38:47,880 Speaker 1: A to B. Is there anything your dad you've been 679 00:38:47,920 --> 00:38:50,080 Speaker 1: farming for a long time. Surely you have an idea 680 00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:54,719 Speaker 1: and he's like, I don't know. Now, you're still not 681 00:38:54,880 --> 00:38:58,759 Speaker 1: revealing that you've already researched how to get to b right, Dad, 682 00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:00,880 Speaker 1: how do you do this? You're a farm? What kind 683 00:39:00,920 --> 00:39:03,160 Speaker 1: of stuff have you done? And he goes, you know, 684 00:39:03,200 --> 00:39:06,320 Speaker 1: what we could do if we were going to do anything, 685 00:39:06,640 --> 00:39:10,759 Speaker 1: we could do this and you're like, yeah, Dad, that's 686 00:39:10,760 --> 00:39:14,280 Speaker 1: a great idea. We could try that. And then Dad, 687 00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:16,520 Speaker 1: if we do that, then you kind of that's when 688 00:39:16,520 --> 00:39:19,080 Speaker 1: you sprinkle your idea in. We could also do a 689 00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:22,880 Speaker 1: little bit of this, and your dad's like, that's actually 690 00:39:22,880 --> 00:39:26,160 Speaker 1: not a bad idea. Okay, Well maybe we start at harvest, 691 00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:28,560 Speaker 1: or maybe we start in the spring. We start implementing 692 00:39:28,560 --> 00:39:33,160 Speaker 1: this new thing in the spring, and let's split it up. 693 00:39:33,200 --> 00:39:35,080 Speaker 1: Dad like, what am I going to do to help this? 694 00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:36,680 Speaker 1: And what are you going to do? And he's like, well, 695 00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:39,160 Speaker 1: I'll do this part and you do this part and 696 00:39:39,200 --> 00:39:42,359 Speaker 1: you go done. Cool. So that way, anonymous, you're both 697 00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:46,040 Speaker 1: owning it. You're both owning the solution together. You're honoring 698 00:39:46,080 --> 00:39:48,279 Speaker 1: your dad. It's his farm. You're not changing it on 699 00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:51,760 Speaker 1: your own will. You're involving him. From the very beginning 700 00:39:51,760 --> 00:39:56,239 Speaker 1: of the problem, and you're bringing him in together from 701 00:39:56,280 --> 00:39:58,759 Speaker 1: the get go, from the ground up. And so then 702 00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:01,480 Speaker 1: when you have success and you look back and you 703 00:40:01,520 --> 00:40:03,840 Speaker 1: celebrate and you go, Dad, we did it. Look we 704 00:40:03,960 --> 00:40:06,359 Speaker 1: raised our gain by this, or we did this or 705 00:40:07,120 --> 00:40:12,399 Speaker 1: whatever measure of success you're looking at Dad, Look what 706 00:40:12,480 --> 00:40:18,160 Speaker 1: you did. What a great idea you had. Dad, give him, 707 00:40:18,280 --> 00:40:22,040 Speaker 1: give it to him, give him the trophy. And he's like, well, 708 00:40:22,320 --> 00:40:25,840 Speaker 1: I mean it wasn't all me. You helped too, And 709 00:40:25,840 --> 00:40:27,799 Speaker 1: you're like, yeah, I mean I helped a little bit, 710 00:40:27,840 --> 00:40:31,080 Speaker 1: but Dad, you crushed it. I mean, look what we're doing. 711 00:40:31,480 --> 00:40:34,880 Speaker 1: What you're doing anonymous. Then now you're building this confidence 712 00:40:34,920 --> 00:40:37,720 Speaker 1: with him that he now feels confident that the farm 713 00:40:37,960 --> 00:40:41,760 Speaker 1: can adapt and can change and it can be his idea, 714 00:40:42,320 --> 00:40:46,919 Speaker 1: and you're just guiding him through the whole thing. There's 715 00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:50,400 Speaker 1: a chance that from the very beginning he says, nope, nope, nope, 716 00:40:50,440 --> 00:40:54,120 Speaker 1: not doing anything. If that's the answer, you're asking the 717 00:40:54,120 --> 00:41:02,759 Speaker 1: wrong questions. If he's denying everything, keep changing the question. Ultimately, 718 00:41:03,280 --> 00:41:06,200 Speaker 1: the most important thing you could do is honor your father. 719 00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:10,239 Speaker 1: It's his farm. Try not to be frustrated. I know 720 00:41:10,440 --> 00:41:14,440 Speaker 1: you see, you're younger than him, and you see a 721 00:41:14,480 --> 00:41:18,160 Speaker 1: bigger picture. Because of the Internet or social media, our 722 00:41:18,239 --> 00:41:20,240 Speaker 1: friends that are doing it a different way. You're seeing 723 00:41:20,239 --> 00:41:23,040 Speaker 1: the results in a different way. He can't see that yet. 724 00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:26,239 Speaker 1: But don't let that worry you. Don't let that bother you. 725 00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:31,040 Speaker 1: It's not your farm, it's Dad's. The most important thing 726 00:41:31,400 --> 00:41:35,000 Speaker 1: in this whole deal is your relationship with him, Not 727 00:41:35,120 --> 00:41:41,799 Speaker 1: the farm, not the financial success, your relationship with your dad. 728 00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:46,040 Speaker 1: That's it. Love you guys, See you next Monday. Gee, 729 00:41:46,560 --> 00:41:49,600 Speaker 1: thanks for joining me on the Grangersmith Podcast. I appreciate 730 00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:51,799 Speaker 1: all of you. Guys. You could help me out by 731 00:41:51,920 --> 00:41:55,719 Speaker 1: rating this podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube, subscribe 732 00:41:55,760 --> 00:41:59,160 Speaker 1: to this channel, hit that little like button and notification 733 00:41:59,280 --> 00:42:03,120 Speaker 1: spell so that you never miss anytime I upload a video. 734 00:42:03,440 --> 00:42:05,080 Speaker 1: If you have a question for me that you would 735 00:42:05,120 --> 00:42:10,440 Speaker 1: like me to answer, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. 736 00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:11,040 Speaker 1: Ye