WEBVTT - #53 Girl Talk

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<v Speaker 1>I Suck a Dating with Dean, Vanessa and Jared and

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<v Speaker 1>I Heart radio podcast. Hey guys, thank you for tuning

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<v Speaker 1>in to another episode of Help I Second Dating. It's

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<v Speaker 1>me your fellow Canadian and single actually single Canadian Vanessa.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm joined in studio by myself. Actually, Easton and Mark

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<v Speaker 1>are in today. Um. I don't even know where Jared

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<v Speaker 1>and Dina in Mexico. He's a world traveler lader. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>he's been traveling quite a bit. I think he's going

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<v Speaker 1>with Courtney. And I thought Courtney was a female, but

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<v Speaker 1>it's Courtney from him. He's a nice guy and I

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<v Speaker 1>like instagram stocking him, Like, oh he's cute, and that

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<v Speaker 1>was it. I just instagram stocked him. You didn't actually

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<v Speaker 1>like any pictures or anything? Single? No, because actually, what

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<v Speaker 1>do I want to talk about today? Um? We have

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<v Speaker 1>a quite we have a few guests coming in. Um.

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<v Speaker 1>And I teased it in the last episode talking about

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<v Speaker 1>how I had a date on at Justin and Cody's wedding. Um,

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<v Speaker 1>I thought it was actually the only single person. I

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<v Speaker 1>was a bridesmaid. I thought was the only single person

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<v Speaker 1>UM in her wedding party. She was like, no, I

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<v Speaker 1>think everyone else's single, because I was like, okay, if not,

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<v Speaker 1>this would be pathetic. I had to walk her dog

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<v Speaker 1>down the aisle, which is so funny because as soon

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<v Speaker 1>as I started walking the dog down the aisle, the

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<v Speaker 1>collar he like was so petrified he managed to get

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<v Speaker 1>away from like his collar just popped out and he

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<v Speaker 1>started running, so I had to chase him down. At No,

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<v Speaker 1>definitely not. My thoughts seem like I can never keep

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<v Speaker 1>them guys. They just run away from me. So that

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<v Speaker 1>was my day to the wedding spectacular. So you haven't

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<v Speaker 1>kissed the recently. I actually did kiss the boy recently.

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<v Speaker 1>So I was casually dating someone over the summer um

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<v Speaker 1>and this recently ended not long ago, I would say

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<v Speaker 1>maybe a week ago. This is uh. I was dating

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<v Speaker 1>someone that I met in Montreal. He wasn't from Montreal, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>but we decided to end things. I kind of knew

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<v Speaker 1>and I want to get into it today. We actually

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<v Speaker 1>have l from Men coming in, which is she's I

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<v Speaker 1>think this is the third time she's gonna be doing

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<v Speaker 1>the podcast with with us um and I want to

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<v Speaker 1>talk about getting over someone, and I think I tend

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<v Speaker 1>to instead of focusing on what did I learn about

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<v Speaker 1>this breakup. I focus on like, how could I have

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<v Speaker 1>done things better? Or um, what did I do to? Um?

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<v Speaker 1>You know, what did I do so that the relationship fizzled? Well,

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<v Speaker 1>you're you trying to find a way to blame yourself.

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<v Speaker 1>I try to find it. Yeah, and so this was

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<v Speaker 1>hard for you because it sounded casually. You made it

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<v Speaker 1>sound real. It was it was. I think it's just

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<v Speaker 1>like another one. You know, was it an ugly ending

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<v Speaker 1>or did it was? It just fizzled? It wasn't an

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<v Speaker 1>ugly end and you didn't want to fizzle. You're fighting

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<v Speaker 1>the fizzle. I was fighting the fizzle. I don't even

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<v Speaker 1>know why. I think was my ego and I have

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<v Speaker 1>to like, yeah, I have to learn how to um

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<v Speaker 1>train my brain. So what happens is I think I

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<v Speaker 1>tend to I'm very black and white, so the areas

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<v Speaker 1>of gray for me are very uncomfortable, and when I'm

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<v Speaker 1>when it there's a high, it's like, yeah, the high

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<v Speaker 1>is so good, but then the low is so low,

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm like, why why am I upset? I knew

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<v Speaker 1>this person wasn't someone I was gonna end up with,

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<v Speaker 1>or I couldn't picture him being like the father of

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<v Speaker 1>my kids. Um, and I think it's just like the

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<v Speaker 1>ego comes into play, right, and it kind of was

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<v Speaker 1>at first and then like the ball was in his

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<v Speaker 1>court and I and I want to be open and

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<v Speaker 1>I want to talk about this. Of course, this is

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<v Speaker 1>a dating podcast, but I you know, I like listening

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<v Speaker 1>to other people's experiences and learning through their experiences. So

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<v Speaker 1>that's why I want to be open about. You know,

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<v Speaker 1>even if it was something casual, I still want to

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<v Speaker 1>be able to talk about. You know, it hurts, it sucks,

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<v Speaker 1>it's a it's a bit. In a perfect world, would

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<v Speaker 1>you have broken it off and he would be begging

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<v Speaker 1>you to come back? Absolute lutely absolutely, But that's not

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<v Speaker 1>the case. Yeah, did you try to get it going

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<v Speaker 1>again or no? I just yeah. And it's like I'm

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<v Speaker 1>trying to understand, Like I think it's the power of manifestation, right, Um,

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<v Speaker 1>do you know Abraham Hicks. So Abraham Hicks is I

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<v Speaker 1>think is the person behind The Secret, the book The Secret.

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<v Speaker 1>And I've been listening to actually Aimy some send me

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<v Speaker 1>some of her videos and I've been listening to some

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<v Speaker 1>of her videos and basically I think I've been manifesting

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<v Speaker 1>these men that are afraid of commitment, and deep down,

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think I'm at a point where I'm actually

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<v Speaker 1>ready to find someone who wants to settle down and

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<v Speaker 1>have kids and all of that. You know what I mean?

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<v Speaker 1>Does that make sense? You're not ready, so you're not

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<v Speaker 1>manifesting who are ready? Right? And I think the universe

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<v Speaker 1>responds to what you want, and if you don't know

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<v Speaker 1>what you want, the universe is going to send you

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<v Speaker 1>all these different signs for you to pick from, but

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<v Speaker 1>they're they're like just like whatever, they're not they're not

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<v Speaker 1>specific to what you want. And I think that's what's

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<v Speaker 1>been happening because I have I have friends who are like,

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<v Speaker 1>oh my god, I know this guy. He's perfect, he

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<v Speaker 1>wants to settle down, he wants to have kids, he

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<v Speaker 1>wants to get married. And I'm like, find me the

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<v Speaker 1>guy who doesn't, and I want to turn him into

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<v Speaker 1>that guy. But that's interesting, So how do you get

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<v Speaker 1>to that point in your life? Though? If you're not

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<v Speaker 1>there now, how do you get there? Um? I guess

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<v Speaker 1>that's why we're going to have these people coming and

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<v Speaker 1>calling in today to professional help issue or is it

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<v Speaker 1>a patience issue? Now? I think it's a patience issue.

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<v Speaker 1>I think it's also you have this idea when you're younger, right, um.

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<v Speaker 1>And I come from a very traditional Italian family, and

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<v Speaker 1>I think at some point I thought I wanted exactly

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<v Speaker 1>what my Italian traditional family had, like you you go

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<v Speaker 1>to school, you get your degree, you find someone, you

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<v Speaker 1>get married, you have kids. I ended up on the Bachelor, Like,

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<v Speaker 1>that's so far off from what my family would have

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<v Speaker 1>expected from me. Um. So I think I'm at a

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<v Speaker 1>stage right now where I'm it just turned thirty one,

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<v Speaker 1>So of course, is that pressure of I want kids,

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<v Speaker 1>Like I've been wanting kids ever since I was a kid,

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<v Speaker 1>ever since I was a kid myself. So I think

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<v Speaker 1>it's it's it's a mix of getting older and realizing, Okay, well,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm also in an era where there's so many options

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<v Speaker 1>out there for other men and for women as well, um,

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<v Speaker 1>and finding exactly what it is that I want. What

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<v Speaker 1>kind of lifestyle do I want? What kind of family

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<v Speaker 1>do I want? What kind of um, you know, career

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<v Speaker 1>do I envision myself having. I was also the type

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<v Speaker 1>of girlfriend that would drop everything for the guy I

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<v Speaker 1>was dating and just be their cheerleader all the time,

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<v Speaker 1>and I want to find someone who's going to root

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<v Speaker 1>for me and and want me to succeed just as

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<v Speaker 1>much as they're succeeding. So it's finding that balance. There's

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<v Speaker 1>a chicken or egg component here, like you haven't found

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<v Speaker 1>the right guy because you're think you're not ready. But

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<v Speaker 1>also if you found the right guy, would you become

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<v Speaker 1>read get that point? Maybe that's part of it. Yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>if you've met Ah, this is the guy. I could

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<v Speaker 1>raise kids with this guy. This guy's everything I'm looking for.

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<v Speaker 1>Suddenly I'm ready to settle down. Yeah. Yeah, And actually,

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<v Speaker 1>you know what, I take that word back. I don't

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<v Speaker 1>like the words settling down because I feel like there's

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<v Speaker 1>a negative connotation to it. I want to be able

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<v Speaker 1>to you know, I think deep down, were you guys

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<v Speaker 1>afraid of commitment before? Yes? And that's that's kind of

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<v Speaker 1>what I'm saying, is with the wrong people. I was

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<v Speaker 1>a commitment with a number of different women that was

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<v Speaker 1>going in that direction. I was like, this isn't for me.

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<v Speaker 1>I gotta get out of this. Even though it's going great,

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<v Speaker 1>I gotta get out because this isn't the one for me.

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<v Speaker 1>But with Amy, my wife, that all went out the window. Yeah. Interesting,

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<v Speaker 1>that was the same way. In fact, I didn't even

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<v Speaker 1>believe in the idea of marriage. My my parents are divorced. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>and I was like, uh, this isn't for humans, Like

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<v Speaker 1>people aren't supposed to get married and be of one

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<v Speaker 1>person forever. You know, this is this isn't gonna work

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<v Speaker 1>for me. I'll just do whatever. And then um, I

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<v Speaker 1>met Alison and I saw how well life could work

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<v Speaker 1>with some when you were compatible with and that supports

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<v Speaker 1>you and helps you grow in such a way. And

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<v Speaker 1>now I have a ring on my finger and I'm

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<v Speaker 1>very staunchly believe in marriage. There it is there, there

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<v Speaker 1>you go is finding the one changes everything? Vanessa, would

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<v Speaker 1>you ever have kids on your own? I'm gonna start crying.

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<v Speaker 1>Actually that just triggered me. That sounds like not your

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<v Speaker 1>first choice. And we had this conversation. Um it wasn't. Yeah, sorry,

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<v Speaker 1>I actually woke up crying this morning. I'm such a baby. Um,

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<v Speaker 1>I think, oh damn it. And my makeup was so

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<v Speaker 1>good this morning. I think. You know, people ask me

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<v Speaker 1>what do you aspire to be? Um, and they think

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<v Speaker 1>I'm going to say something. The thing I'm gonna say

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<v Speaker 1>something career wise. But for me, I've always wanted to

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<v Speaker 1>be a mom, And I think, um, when you're you

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<v Speaker 1>want something so badly, you're afraid that it's just not

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<v Speaker 1>going to happen for you, And so I'm trying to

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<v Speaker 1>suppress that feeling and trying to focus on other things

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<v Speaker 1>so that I don't UM, I guess I don't put

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<v Speaker 1>expectations right on the idea of finding that person to

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<v Speaker 1>have that family with. What if instead of trying to

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<v Speaker 1>suppress it, you surrender it, you turn it over two

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<v Speaker 1>the universe or God or fate or whatever, because I

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<v Speaker 1>think sometimes when you bury it, bury it. No, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>not going to think about that. I'm gonna think about

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<v Speaker 1>something else. It makes it more powerful. And if you

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<v Speaker 1>let it go and all that emotion, he's a little

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<v Speaker 1>bit Yeah. I mean it's weird because when I'm I'm

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<v Speaker 1>I'm either single, perpetually single, like I'm not talking to anyone,

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<v Speaker 1>or if I have a little bit of interest in someone,

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<v Speaker 1>all my attention goes to them. And I think that's

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<v Speaker 1>what I've been doing wrong. Instead of being able to

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<v Speaker 1>date multiple people at the same time to kind of

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<v Speaker 1>put the pressure off of one specific person, that you're

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<v Speaker 1>really into I I focus on that relationship and then

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<v Speaker 1>when that doesn't work out, it's just it's heartbreaking because

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<v Speaker 1>it's like, oh, like here we go again, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>back to square one, but back to your question mark. Um, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>and I apologize, Yeah, and I'm gonna start crying about

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<v Speaker 1>it again, but absolutely like that's what I want, UM,

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<v Speaker 1>And I haven't. I've had that discussion with myself and

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<v Speaker 1>with my friends and my family about freezing my eggs.

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<v Speaker 1>And you know, I actually have a friend who's in

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<v Speaker 1>her forties and she she's like, the one piece of

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<v Speaker 1>advice that I can give you, um, is freeze your

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<v Speaker 1>eggs because you just don't know when you will find

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<v Speaker 1>that person, or you might not find that person at

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<v Speaker 1>the specific time that you want to find him to

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<v Speaker 1>have kids. You know, that's a conversation that women have

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<v Speaker 1>to have with ourselves. And um, she froze her eggs

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<v Speaker 1>later on in life, so I think that I don't

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<v Speaker 1>know how the process works exactly, But anyways, it's harder

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<v Speaker 1>for her now to to um to have a baby,

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<v Speaker 1>but she she encouraged it. So definitely a conversation I'm

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<v Speaker 1>having with myself. Well, I think You're gonna be a

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<v Speaker 1>great mom. Thank you. I'm I'm you know, it's gonna happen.

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<v Speaker 1>It's gonna happen. I was actually with UM. I went

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<v Speaker 1>on Dancing with the Stars last night to see Joe

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<v Speaker 1>and Jordan perform, and UM Kendall and Kylie were there.

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<v Speaker 1>So Kendall's twin sister, and we were talking they're twins,

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<v Speaker 1>and my publicists she has twin boys as well, sisters.

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<v Speaker 1>No no, no, not the gender sisters, right, and actually

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<v Speaker 1>it's just so funny. So it's Kylie, Kendall and their

0:11:54.120 --> 0:11:58.800
<v Speaker 1>brothers Robert, like like the Cardassians. So she took out

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<v Speaker 1>this thing and it's a pend I don't know what

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<v Speaker 1>it's called pendulum pendulum. Yeah, so she's like, let me

0:12:04.720 --> 0:12:07.040
<v Speaker 1>see how many babies you're gonna have, and I literally

0:12:07.120 --> 0:12:09.560
<v Speaker 1>just froze and almost started crying. So I'm like, if

0:12:09.600 --> 0:12:13.120
<v Speaker 1>that thing doesn't move, I'm gonna have a panic attack.

0:12:13.960 --> 0:12:16.960
<v Speaker 1>So it did and it was boy girl boy. So

0:12:17.040 --> 0:12:23.520
<v Speaker 1>apparently I gonna have three babies. Okay, So before we

0:12:23.559 --> 0:12:27.480
<v Speaker 1>go any further, UM, I need you guys to check

0:12:27.480 --> 0:12:30.760
<v Speaker 1>out Spit. It's actually a new podcast, UM, and it

0:12:30.760 --> 0:12:33.959
<v Speaker 1>talks about how we're actually all connected, and we have

0:12:34.080 --> 0:12:37.560
<v Speaker 1>this idea that we feel like we're more divided. Um

0:12:37.679 --> 0:12:39.400
<v Speaker 1>And if you're tired of hearing all about the things

0:12:39.440 --> 0:12:41.760
<v Speaker 1>that separate us, and you have to check out Spit.

0:12:41.800 --> 0:12:44.600
<v Speaker 1>It's a new podcast from my Heart Radio with twenty

0:12:44.600 --> 0:12:46.880
<v Speaker 1>three and me where they explore all things DNA and

0:12:46.920 --> 0:12:51.880
<v Speaker 1>how we're all point five percent genetically Like that is insane.

0:12:51.920 --> 0:12:54.400
<v Speaker 1>So the host sits Down, Sits Down with the biggest

0:12:54.480 --> 0:12:59.080
<v Speaker 1>artists including John Legend, Pete Wentz, Mike Posner, and influencers

0:12:59.080 --> 0:13:01.160
<v Speaker 1>of our time to talk about how the world of

0:13:01.200 --> 0:13:03.960
<v Speaker 1>genetic testing is changing who we are and the world

0:13:04.000 --> 0:13:07.079
<v Speaker 1>around us. To explore a variety of important topics such

0:13:07.120 --> 0:13:09.800
<v Speaker 1>as how signs stacks up against the stories we've been told,

0:13:10.320 --> 0:13:14.000
<v Speaker 1>how much nature versus nurture impacts who we become, the

0:13:14.080 --> 0:13:17.439
<v Speaker 1>modern definition of family genetics, and race outsmarting our jeans,

0:13:17.720 --> 0:13:19.480
<v Speaker 1>and a whole lot more. Make sure to check out

0:13:19.480 --> 0:13:22.439
<v Speaker 1>full episodes now on the I Heart Radio app or

0:13:22.480 --> 0:13:25.920
<v Speaker 1>wherever you listen to podcasts. Okay, so we actually have

0:13:26.240 --> 0:13:28.720
<v Speaker 1>l from mend in studio right now. This is thank

0:13:28.760 --> 0:13:30.800
<v Speaker 1>you for coming and this is your third time and

0:13:30.800 --> 0:13:32.720
<v Speaker 1>this is the first time I'm meeting you, I know,

0:13:32.800 --> 0:13:34.720
<v Speaker 1>it's so good to meet, so good to me, And

0:13:34.720 --> 0:13:36.640
<v Speaker 1>this is the perfect timing right now because I'm kind

0:13:36.640 --> 0:13:38.240
<v Speaker 1>of I mean, I don't want to make it bigger

0:13:38.240 --> 0:13:39.719
<v Speaker 1>than what it is. It wasn't like, oh my god,

0:13:39.760 --> 0:13:41.840
<v Speaker 1>I'm heartbroken over this guy. I was just like, I

0:13:41.880 --> 0:13:44.760
<v Speaker 1>want to understand. I think I want to understand the

0:13:44.800 --> 0:13:48.960
<v Speaker 1>process of breaking up because I'm so used to, um

0:13:49.000 --> 0:13:51.680
<v Speaker 1>having relationships kind of end, even if it's like a

0:13:51.720 --> 0:13:53.800
<v Speaker 1>one week thing, a two week thing. Um, you have

0:13:53.880 --> 0:13:56.240
<v Speaker 1>those expectations and when they're not met, you think I

0:13:56.280 --> 0:13:59.160
<v Speaker 1>would be a pro ad breakups, but I'm not. I

0:13:59.280 --> 0:14:01.720
<v Speaker 1>still like, you know, and I still suck at this.

0:14:01.840 --> 0:14:04.439
<v Speaker 1>So what are some tips that you can give? Well,

0:14:04.480 --> 0:14:06.680
<v Speaker 1>it depends on what phase you're in. So are you

0:14:07.040 --> 0:14:09.760
<v Speaker 1>when was the breakup? And and what phase are you

0:14:09.760 --> 0:14:11.840
<v Speaker 1>in right now? Are you in the really physical part

0:14:11.840 --> 0:14:14.320
<v Speaker 1>where you're going through withdrawal? Are you? And I think

0:14:14.320 --> 0:14:17.240
<v Speaker 1>that's what it is. Yeah, when was it? This is

0:14:17.280 --> 0:14:21.400
<v Speaker 1>a week ago? Oh my god? So fresh? Okay, but

0:14:21.440 --> 0:14:24.160
<v Speaker 1>I want to be like, come on, Vanessa, like get

0:14:24.160 --> 0:14:26.840
<v Speaker 1>it together. He was not like not a guy that

0:14:26.840 --> 0:14:28.440
<v Speaker 1>I was like, oh my god, I'm gonna end up

0:14:28.440 --> 0:14:30.000
<v Speaker 1>with him. It was a guy that was like, this

0:14:30.040 --> 0:14:31.800
<v Speaker 1>is fun, and I think it was the first time

0:14:31.800 --> 0:14:36.200
<v Speaker 1>that I was enjoying a casual relationship. Um. But I

0:14:36.200 --> 0:14:37.840
<v Speaker 1>guess like, deep down I didn't want it to be

0:14:37.960 --> 0:14:39.840
<v Speaker 1>you know what I mean, because I'm not used to that. Yeah.

0:14:39.840 --> 0:14:43.080
<v Speaker 1>So that's interesting what you just said, because it sounds

0:14:43.120 --> 0:14:46.200
<v Speaker 1>like maybe you didn't even really want a relationship with him,

0:14:46.200 --> 0:14:48.880
<v Speaker 1>but you're still heartbroken. Yeah, okay, and so you're trying

0:14:48.920 --> 0:14:53.560
<v Speaker 1>to understand that. Yeah, I wonder if, um, do we

0:14:53.720 --> 0:14:56.040
<v Speaker 1>have Dr Jennifer Freed on the line right now, and

0:14:56.040 --> 0:15:00.720
<v Speaker 1>if she's listening into what we're talking about. Hi, Dr Jennifer,

0:15:00.720 --> 0:15:04.800
<v Speaker 1>how are you? I'm excellent. How are you all doing? That?

0:15:04.840 --> 0:15:08.000
<v Speaker 1>Could be better? Yeah, we're doing well. We're half heartbroken

0:15:08.000 --> 0:15:12.240
<v Speaker 1>over here. So, um, which half half of the heart

0:15:12.320 --> 0:15:15.320
<v Speaker 1>is broken? I mean actually not in tire. It's just

0:15:15.320 --> 0:15:18.120
<v Speaker 1>as a little crack, you know. It's like it's like

0:15:18.120 --> 0:15:20.800
<v Speaker 1>a many heartbreak. Um. So Dr Jennifer Freed, can you

0:15:20.840 --> 0:15:25.840
<v Speaker 1>give us a little intro to what you do? Okay?

0:15:25.880 --> 0:15:31.520
<v Speaker 1>I am a worldwide specialist in social emotional learning, which

0:15:31.560 --> 0:15:36.640
<v Speaker 1>is about how to have healthy relationships Additionally, I'm a

0:15:36.680 --> 0:15:42.040
<v Speaker 1>psychological astrologer and a fault with people around the world

0:15:42.240 --> 0:15:47.960
<v Speaker 1>about all matters of the heart and soul. Okay, psychological astrologer,

0:15:48.040 --> 0:15:51.920
<v Speaker 1>can you get into details about what that entails. It

0:15:51.960 --> 0:15:55.840
<v Speaker 1>means that I'm both a PhD in psychology and an

0:15:55.840 --> 0:16:00.720
<v Speaker 1>internationally certified astrologer, and I combine those two actices so

0:16:00.920 --> 0:16:05.640
<v Speaker 1>people really get through an astrological reading to understand their

0:16:05.760 --> 0:16:14.160
<v Speaker 1>patterns and their neuroses, but also their potentials and divine timing. Yeah.

0:16:14.200 --> 0:16:17.680
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, okay, so can we do like a little

0:16:17.960 --> 0:16:24.000
<v Speaker 1>um analysis on me? Absolutely? If you're September thirtieth, that

0:16:24.160 --> 0:16:29.680
<v Speaker 1>is me. People just turn First of all, congratulations, you

0:16:29.760 --> 0:16:36.320
<v Speaker 1>finished your Saturn return. You're now an astrological adult. Everyone's

0:16:36.360 --> 0:16:38.880
<v Speaker 1>like nodding in the room. I'm like, I'm from Montreal.

0:16:38.920 --> 0:16:42.400
<v Speaker 1>We don't know any of this stuff. What does that mean? Quickly?

0:16:42.440 --> 0:16:48.000
<v Speaker 1>It means that the Saturn planet was in Sagittarius at

0:16:48.040 --> 0:16:51.240
<v Speaker 1>the moments of your birth, and after thirty years it

0:16:51.320 --> 0:16:55.480
<v Speaker 1>goes back to that original position. And what we've learned

0:16:55.600 --> 0:16:59.840
<v Speaker 1>through hundreds of years of reading is that when Saturn

0:17:00.080 --> 0:17:03.640
<v Speaker 1>turns to its original position, which takes about thirty years.

0:17:03.840 --> 0:17:08.040
<v Speaker 1>It means that you've completed a cycle of learning and maturation,

0:17:08.560 --> 0:17:11.040
<v Speaker 1>and whatever it is you've learned will carry on for

0:17:11.080 --> 0:17:16.200
<v Speaker 1>the rest of your life. WHOA, that's deep. So I've

0:17:16.240 --> 0:17:19.879
<v Speaker 1>completed that cycle. Yes, you have, and now you're in

0:17:19.880 --> 0:17:23.360
<v Speaker 1>a new cycle. And the one cycle that you're in

0:17:23.400 --> 0:17:28.800
<v Speaker 1>that we can talk about is called Saturn square the moon.

0:17:29.119 --> 0:17:32.600
<v Speaker 1>And when we have Saturn square the moon, it's when

0:17:32.640 --> 0:17:36.800
<v Speaker 1>we experience emotional pain for the purpose of becoming more

0:17:36.920 --> 0:17:43.000
<v Speaker 1>authoritative and clear about our deepest core needs. Oh well,

0:17:44.440 --> 0:17:48.560
<v Speaker 1>so I'm in a process of experiencing emotional pain. Can

0:17:48.560 --> 0:17:51.919
<v Speaker 1>you repeat that. I'm writing this down. Okay, Vanessa, you

0:17:52.000 --> 0:17:56.200
<v Speaker 1>are in the process of experiencing emotional pain in order

0:17:56.720 --> 0:18:00.879
<v Speaker 1>to get more clear and defined about your core names.

0:18:01.760 --> 0:18:05.680
<v Speaker 1>You would you ever again, Yeah, you would. You would

0:18:05.720 --> 0:18:10.919
<v Speaker 1>never again pick an unsuitable partner who does not really

0:18:11.080 --> 0:18:15.320
<v Speaker 1>get you at a core level. You You're here to

0:18:15.440 --> 0:18:22.120
<v Speaker 1>be deeply, traditionally loved. Yes you want, Dr Jennifer. Yes,

0:18:22.160 --> 0:18:25.880
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna start crying again. Yes, that's what I want. Well,

0:18:25.960 --> 0:18:28.359
<v Speaker 1>you will have that, I have no doubt about it.

0:18:28.359 --> 0:18:30.840
<v Speaker 1>It's just that this is not that moment because there's

0:18:30.880 --> 0:18:36.720
<v Speaker 1>some material that you've uncovered around self worth and feeling

0:18:37.000 --> 0:18:41.320
<v Speaker 1>deserving of the kind of really supreme love you want.

0:18:41.440 --> 0:18:44.160
<v Speaker 1>And I feel like you're going through the next six

0:18:44.240 --> 0:18:46.800
<v Speaker 1>months clear that crap out of you so that you

0:18:46.840 --> 0:18:51.679
<v Speaker 1>can find the person that is really suitable for your future. Okay.

0:18:51.720 --> 0:18:54.720
<v Speaker 1>So does that mean does that mean I'm going to

0:18:54.880 --> 0:18:57.720
<v Speaker 1>find someone in the next six months or I'm just

0:18:57.760 --> 0:19:00.280
<v Speaker 1>gonna detox from all of this garbage for the next

0:19:00.320 --> 0:19:04.120
<v Speaker 1>six months. Well, I would put it to you this way.

0:19:04.440 --> 0:19:09.560
<v Speaker 1>You want to be thank you clean inside and out emotionally,

0:19:10.080 --> 0:19:13.760
<v Speaker 1>so that you attract and magnetize towards you a man

0:19:14.000 --> 0:19:17.360
<v Speaker 1>that can handle you, that can appreciate you, and it's

0:19:17.440 --> 0:19:22.840
<v Speaker 1>going to be a rock for you. Okay. Yeah. And

0:19:23.119 --> 0:19:25.960
<v Speaker 1>I think that sometimes we keep coming up against the

0:19:26.040 --> 0:19:30.600
<v Speaker 1>same people so that we until we learn the lesson. Right.

0:19:30.640 --> 0:19:33.040
<v Speaker 1>So you were saying this person that you were just dating,

0:19:33.640 --> 0:19:36.399
<v Speaker 1>you weren't even that emotionally invested in it. It seemed

0:19:36.440 --> 0:19:38.879
<v Speaker 1>like when you were dating them, but then you were

0:19:38.920 --> 0:19:42.800
<v Speaker 1>still heartbroken about it. Um, And that's interesting. Do you

0:19:42.840 --> 0:19:45.080
<v Speaker 1>think that he had any similarities to guys that you

0:19:45.240 --> 0:19:50.159
<v Speaker 1>dated in the past. Yeah? Absolutely, So it's like a pattern. Yeah,

0:19:50.240 --> 0:19:52.480
<v Speaker 1>The other piece of your chart I'm looking at it

0:19:52.520 --> 0:19:55.359
<v Speaker 1>is that you have something called in your natal chart

0:19:55.400 --> 0:19:59.800
<v Speaker 1>meaning from Firth Venus square neptune, which I happen to

0:19:59.800 --> 0:20:01.879
<v Speaker 1>have also, so I'm an expert on it, which is

0:20:02.440 --> 0:20:09.199
<v Speaker 1>hopelessly romantic. Your romantic ideas live in the heavens, not

0:20:09.440 --> 0:20:13.320
<v Speaker 1>in clay feet, And so part of what you're learning, Vanessa,

0:20:13.600 --> 0:20:20.800
<v Speaker 1>is that you're extraordinary, magical fantasy life about romance belongs

0:20:21.040 --> 0:20:25.919
<v Speaker 1>in TV shows and art and music, and you have

0:20:26.080 --> 0:20:30.879
<v Speaker 1>to make room for real people to love you. So

0:20:31.000 --> 0:20:34.720
<v Speaker 1>that doesn't exist. It doesn't exist in the way you think.

0:20:34.760 --> 0:20:37.439
<v Speaker 1>It says, I live a highly romantic life, but a

0:20:37.480 --> 0:20:42.320
<v Speaker 1>lot of what I experience is generated through my romantic lens,

0:20:42.720 --> 0:20:46.520
<v Speaker 1>not through reality. It's a very subtle shift. It's like

0:20:46.680 --> 0:20:51.119
<v Speaker 1>you are a manufacturer of romance. Everywhere you go. You

0:20:51.160 --> 0:20:55.000
<v Speaker 1>can romance the grocery person, you can romance your slippers

0:20:55.040 --> 0:20:59.000
<v Speaker 1>because you see life through this beautiful rose colored glasses.

0:20:59.080 --> 0:21:02.000
<v Speaker 1>It's beautiful, it is. Don't ever don't ever lose it.

0:21:02.359 --> 0:21:08.199
<v Speaker 1>But when people are not that romantic antasy that you've created,

0:21:08.920 --> 0:21:11.280
<v Speaker 1>lets them have clay feet and see how beautiful they're

0:21:11.359 --> 0:21:13.960
<v Speaker 1>clay feet are the guy that you're going to really

0:21:14.080 --> 0:21:17.040
<v Speaker 1>end up with is not going to be the sweep

0:21:17.119 --> 0:21:19.320
<v Speaker 1>you off your feet kind of guy. He's going to

0:21:19.400 --> 0:21:22.040
<v Speaker 1>be the guy that grounds your romantic fantasy so that

0:21:22.080 --> 0:21:25.199
<v Speaker 1>you get to live them all out. Mm hmmm, I

0:21:25.280 --> 0:21:27.879
<v Speaker 1>like that. And are you able to see into the

0:21:27.960 --> 0:21:34.800
<v Speaker 1>future like what this guy looks like? I'm not that type.

0:21:34.840 --> 0:21:38.520
<v Speaker 1>I don't see the future. I can tell you, you you

0:21:38.640 --> 0:21:40.879
<v Speaker 1>know you're you're very sexy. I don't know you. I

0:21:40.920 --> 0:21:43.639
<v Speaker 1>don't know anything about you to be truthful, but I

0:21:43.640 --> 0:21:46.520
<v Speaker 1>would say to you, you're very sexy, You're very alluring,

0:21:46.560 --> 0:21:49.960
<v Speaker 1>you're very charming, you're very giving. So the guy's got

0:21:49.960 --> 0:21:52.320
<v Speaker 1>to have the goods. I don't know what he looks like,

0:21:52.480 --> 0:21:57.960
<v Speaker 1>but he can't be some schlump. Well see that. I mean.

0:21:58.119 --> 0:22:00.080
<v Speaker 1>The funny thing is if you line up every re

0:22:00.160 --> 0:22:03.639
<v Speaker 1>guy that I've dated, no one looks alike. I've dated

0:22:03.760 --> 0:22:09.520
<v Speaker 1>half Jamaican, half Chinese, I've dated like tall, shut um,

0:22:09.520 --> 0:22:12.800
<v Speaker 1>like no one like physically, no one looks the same.

0:22:13.400 --> 0:22:18.880
<v Speaker 1>But they're all very highly motivated people and extremely funny.

0:22:19.480 --> 0:22:22.439
<v Speaker 1>So now that good. It does seem good, But then

0:22:22.480 --> 0:22:25.760
<v Speaker 1>it's also room for are they family men? Because I

0:22:25.880 --> 0:22:28.760
<v Speaker 1>know that you really want a family, so most of

0:22:28.800 --> 0:22:32.640
<v Speaker 1>them aren't. That's the issue. And I think, Um, when

0:22:32.680 --> 0:22:34.840
<v Speaker 1>I start talking about how close I am to my family,

0:22:34.960 --> 0:22:37.320
<v Speaker 1>and I understand, like I've my expectations now are a

0:22:37.320 --> 0:22:39.360
<v Speaker 1>lot lower when it comes to that, because it's hard

0:22:39.400 --> 0:22:41.399
<v Speaker 1>to find someone who is as close to their family

0:22:41.440 --> 0:22:45.840
<v Speaker 1>as I am unless I date like strictly Italian. Um.

0:22:45.880 --> 0:22:47.639
<v Speaker 1>Not really opposed to that, but not like, you know,

0:22:48.160 --> 0:22:52.160
<v Speaker 1>super excited about that idea either. Um, So I think

0:22:52.400 --> 0:22:55.960
<v Speaker 1>I need to I think I know my issue. My

0:22:56.080 --> 0:22:59.280
<v Speaker 1>issue is, and I said this before, I tend to

0:22:59.320 --> 0:23:03.520
<v Speaker 1>go all in way too quick. And if I like

0:23:03.640 --> 0:23:06.760
<v Speaker 1>someone and I'll see potential in them, I'll want to

0:23:06.840 --> 0:23:09.320
<v Speaker 1>make sure I can try it out with them and

0:23:09.400 --> 0:23:11.720
<v Speaker 1>see how far we can take it and try every

0:23:11.760 --> 0:23:14.320
<v Speaker 1>avenue we can we can take to make it work.

0:23:14.320 --> 0:23:15.879
<v Speaker 1>And if it doesn't work, then I'm like all right,

0:23:15.880 --> 0:23:17.920
<v Speaker 1>and then I'm good onto the next. Do you fall

0:23:17.920 --> 0:23:21.720
<v Speaker 1>in love with the potential of someone? Absolutely, I romanticize relationships.

0:23:22.359 --> 0:23:27.600
<v Speaker 1>I I'm this is this is like the beautiful part

0:23:27.680 --> 0:23:31.359
<v Speaker 1>of heartbreak. Right. You're you're learning more about yourself and

0:23:31.760 --> 0:23:34.359
<v Speaker 1>what you want and what you need, and that's what

0:23:34.400 --> 0:23:36.080
<v Speaker 1>I want to I want to start learning how to

0:23:36.119 --> 0:23:40.960
<v Speaker 1>train my brain to um, I guess I get outside

0:23:40.960 --> 0:23:43.360
<v Speaker 1>of that bachelor world, right, because like that bachelor world

0:23:43.480 --> 0:23:46.720
<v Speaker 1>is so like romantic and lovely and you know, every

0:23:46.800 --> 0:23:49.280
<v Speaker 1>date is perfect and you're loved and all of that.

0:23:49.600 --> 0:23:51.880
<v Speaker 1>But in the real world, like you're saying, Dr Jennifer,

0:23:52.000 --> 0:23:55.159
<v Speaker 1>it's not like that, And I think I have a

0:23:55.200 --> 0:23:57.639
<v Speaker 1>hard time. You know, if I'm able to do that,

0:23:57.680 --> 0:24:00.600
<v Speaker 1>why can a guy do that? Why can I to

0:24:00.640 --> 0:24:03.159
<v Speaker 1>tell you that? Because the way it is in the

0:24:03.280 --> 0:24:08.359
<v Speaker 1>universe is other news attracts. You don't actually fall in

0:24:08.400 --> 0:24:10.920
<v Speaker 1>love with somebody like you because there would be no

0:24:11.080 --> 0:24:14.560
<v Speaker 1>purpose and no learning. So in your case, you carry

0:24:14.640 --> 0:24:17.760
<v Speaker 1>enough romanticism for the whole world. So who you will

0:24:17.880 --> 0:24:20.919
<v Speaker 1>end up with, it will be quite satisfied with, is

0:24:21.040 --> 0:24:25.720
<v Speaker 1>somebody that actually loved and adored how over the top

0:24:25.840 --> 0:24:28.600
<v Speaker 1>you are. But they are not going to be matching

0:24:28.640 --> 0:24:30.800
<v Speaker 1>you on that. They're going to be receiving it and

0:24:30.840 --> 0:24:36.200
<v Speaker 1>feeling grateful and feeling reciprocal in terms of energy and

0:24:36.240 --> 0:24:39.359
<v Speaker 1>time and devotion. But they're not going to be hitting

0:24:39.400 --> 0:24:42.359
<v Speaker 1>the high notes with you, because that would crash, that

0:24:42.400 --> 0:24:47.080
<v Speaker 1>would not laugh interesting. So someone I guess who has

0:24:47.080 --> 0:24:50.119
<v Speaker 1>the same love languages as I do. Yes, but also

0:24:50.240 --> 0:24:54.800
<v Speaker 1>just gets off on how freaking imaginative you are, like, oh,

0:24:54.840 --> 0:24:57.920
<v Speaker 1>bring that. Banes said, yes, let's do that. But they're

0:24:57.920 --> 0:25:00.600
<v Speaker 1>not going to be the initiators of that, except for

0:25:00.640 --> 0:25:04.000
<v Speaker 1>maybe in a subtle, quiet way. You're looking for somebody

0:25:04.400 --> 0:25:08.200
<v Speaker 1>that actually is very secure inside themselves and doesn't need

0:25:08.240 --> 0:25:11.080
<v Speaker 1>to be fixed up. That's who you're looking for. It's

0:25:11.160 --> 0:25:13.840
<v Speaker 1>that meaning there's no fixing to do on them. I

0:25:13.840 --> 0:25:15.760
<v Speaker 1>want to ask you a question about when you're dating

0:25:15.880 --> 0:25:17.520
<v Speaker 1>and when you're meeting these guys. So you said that

0:25:17.520 --> 0:25:19.960
<v Speaker 1>there's a pattern not in how they look, but in

0:25:20.080 --> 0:25:24.080
<v Speaker 1>in sort of how they are. Um when you are

0:25:24.119 --> 0:25:26.480
<v Speaker 1>on the first couple of dates, do you feel like

0:25:27.359 --> 0:25:30.879
<v Speaker 1>you have a gut feeling about them and whether or

0:25:30.920 --> 0:25:32.840
<v Speaker 1>not they're a good match for you and you decide

0:25:32.880 --> 0:25:35.879
<v Speaker 1>to pursue it anyway, or do you really feel like

0:25:35.920 --> 0:25:38.240
<v Speaker 1>you don't have all of the information that you need

0:25:38.359 --> 0:25:41.560
<v Speaker 1>and that's why you keep pursuing the relationship. I think

0:25:41.600 --> 0:25:47.360
<v Speaker 1>the issue that I have I'm very intuitive, and I

0:25:47.359 --> 0:25:50.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, I'm so intuitive, but sometimes I'm like, oh,

0:25:50.080 --> 0:25:52.480
<v Speaker 1>you know what, maybe it's just like I'm being crazy

0:25:52.560 --> 0:25:54.200
<v Speaker 1>right now and I'm just gonna go with the flow

0:25:54.480 --> 0:25:57.880
<v Speaker 1>and and not think too much into it. But then

0:25:57.920 --> 0:26:03.520
<v Speaker 1>my intuition after either ends or they actually show their

0:26:03.560 --> 0:26:06.040
<v Speaker 1>true colors. Like I knew it all along. I knew

0:26:06.119 --> 0:26:09.080
<v Speaker 1>from the beginning, So then why is it that I

0:26:09.119 --> 0:26:11.560
<v Speaker 1>decide to keep going with it instead of just ending

0:26:11.560 --> 0:26:14.119
<v Speaker 1>it when I know I should end it? Right? That's

0:26:14.119 --> 0:26:19.240
<v Speaker 1>my issue. Yeah, I don't know if it's an issue,

0:26:19.240 --> 0:26:22.280
<v Speaker 1>but it's like it's the lesson, right, It's like what

0:26:22.400 --> 0:26:25.560
<v Speaker 1>you are aware of now, what you've learned, and I

0:26:25.600 --> 0:26:28.399
<v Speaker 1>think the next step is actually acting on it. So

0:26:28.480 --> 0:26:30.199
<v Speaker 1>the next time you're on a date and you have

0:26:30.320 --> 0:26:33.280
<v Speaker 1>that feeling, it's not saying yes to the second date.

0:26:33.880 --> 0:26:36.840
<v Speaker 1>You know, it's like knowing trusting your gut that you

0:26:37.160 --> 0:26:39.880
<v Speaker 1>know yourself the best and you know what you want,

0:26:39.880 --> 0:26:42.760
<v Speaker 1>you know what you're looking for, and you know, look

0:26:42.880 --> 0:26:47.240
<v Speaker 1>like gathering all of the information isn't going to outweigh

0:26:47.240 --> 0:26:49.920
<v Speaker 1>what you knew from the very beginning. That's a really

0:26:50.000 --> 0:26:53.080
<v Speaker 1>huge lesson. It's it's I mean, I've learned that lesson

0:26:53.200 --> 0:26:58.359
<v Speaker 1>just recently too, um so I think it actually sounds

0:26:58.359 --> 0:27:02.159
<v Speaker 1>like you've learned a lot. Yeah. I think with every

0:27:02.200 --> 0:27:06.320
<v Speaker 1>person that I let into my personal space, um, I

0:27:06.400 --> 0:27:11.160
<v Speaker 1>learned a lot about my strengths and my weaknesses when

0:27:11.160 --> 0:27:15.119
<v Speaker 1>it comes to romantic relationships, interpersonal relationships with friends and

0:27:15.119 --> 0:27:19.080
<v Speaker 1>family and all that. Like it's solid. But then, of course,

0:27:19.119 --> 0:27:21.719
<v Speaker 1>like when Dr Jennifer was saying, like I romantics, like,

0:27:21.760 --> 0:27:25.560
<v Speaker 1>I love love, I love love. There's nothing more for me,

0:27:25.600 --> 0:27:28.719
<v Speaker 1>there's nothing more powerful. I love connecting with people. And

0:27:28.720 --> 0:27:32.399
<v Speaker 1>that's even with you know, family members or friends. UM, Like,

0:27:32.440 --> 0:27:36.000
<v Speaker 1>I truly value that. So I guess when that connection

0:27:36.560 --> 0:27:40.240
<v Speaker 1>just ends, it's heartbreaking because it's a connection that you

0:27:40.320 --> 0:27:45.280
<v Speaker 1>had and it's not necessarily about that specific person. Yes,

0:27:45.400 --> 0:27:48.400
<v Speaker 1>and I would want to say to you that it's

0:27:48.400 --> 0:27:52.240
<v Speaker 1>the beautiful, noble quality in you, but that the that

0:27:52.400 --> 0:27:57.120
<v Speaker 1>you allow yourself to dream big, and it's equally it's

0:27:57.240 --> 0:28:00.639
<v Speaker 1>tender and poignant that you cry a lot when the

0:28:00.720 --> 0:28:04.919
<v Speaker 1>dreams don't materialize, because it's just a part of life

0:28:05.000 --> 0:28:08.919
<v Speaker 1>that the idealize things and they disappoint us. But in

0:28:08.960 --> 0:28:11.920
<v Speaker 1>the end, wouldn't you rather be somebody that's been all

0:28:11.960 --> 0:28:15.639
<v Speaker 1>the possibility and living in the possibility than being jaded

0:28:15.720 --> 0:28:18.480
<v Speaker 1>or cynical. Yeah, And you think at this point I

0:28:18.520 --> 0:28:20.680
<v Speaker 1>would be. I had an engagement that didn't work out.

0:28:21.040 --> 0:28:23.080
<v Speaker 1>I've dated a few people throughout the year and it

0:28:23.080 --> 0:28:25.840
<v Speaker 1>hasn't worked out for me, but I still believe in it.

0:28:26.240 --> 0:28:28.440
<v Speaker 1>I still I still want to find that love. And

0:28:28.480 --> 0:28:31.639
<v Speaker 1>I remember I was talking to someone and I had

0:28:31.680 --> 0:28:33.760
<v Speaker 1>gone through a breakup and they're like, your light is

0:28:34.040 --> 0:28:36.840
<v Speaker 1>just dimmer. It's getting dimmer and dimmer. And they've known

0:28:36.840 --> 0:28:39.440
<v Speaker 1>me to be this vibrant person who loves to love,

0:28:40.040 --> 0:28:42.880
<v Speaker 1>and she's like, get back to that sixteen year old

0:28:42.880 --> 0:28:46.040
<v Speaker 1>self that just was so youthful when it came to

0:28:46.120 --> 0:28:50.280
<v Speaker 1>love and really believed in it. And yeah, so I get.

0:28:50.320 --> 0:28:52.640
<v Speaker 1>I have a coaching direction for you, which is in

0:28:52.680 --> 0:28:55.560
<v Speaker 1>these next few months that you're working on this, and

0:28:55.600 --> 0:28:57.680
<v Speaker 1>you are doing great work with it. By the way,

0:28:57.720 --> 0:29:01.400
<v Speaker 1>I commend you high, thank you. I would distribute your

0:29:01.480 --> 0:29:08.400
<v Speaker 1>love more enthusiastically to strangers, to work, colleagues, to friends,

0:29:08.480 --> 0:29:12.400
<v Speaker 1>because it is your power spot. You will never ever

0:29:12.640 --> 0:29:19.040
<v Speaker 1>regret showering love ordinary people because that's what also makes

0:29:19.120 --> 0:29:22.960
<v Speaker 1>your light much brighter. Autely, and your man is coming.

0:29:23.080 --> 0:29:26.000
<v Speaker 1>I assure you that. So if you move deep down

0:29:26.040 --> 0:29:30.120
<v Speaker 1>in your bones of bones your husband's coming. It's not

0:29:30.240 --> 0:29:33.120
<v Speaker 1>like it's an if, it's just a when, and just

0:29:33.400 --> 0:29:36.200
<v Speaker 1>act as if this is your last time in your

0:29:36.240 --> 0:29:40.280
<v Speaker 1>life to be the street and single, to distribute non

0:29:40.480 --> 0:29:43.840
<v Speaker 1>romantic love to everyone, you know. Yeah, and you're absolutely right.

0:29:43.920 --> 0:29:46.480
<v Speaker 1>I am a special education teacher and I love giving

0:29:46.480 --> 0:29:51.560
<v Speaker 1>my students that attention and that. Yeah. So for me,

0:29:51.600 --> 0:29:55.720
<v Speaker 1>that's you're right on the ball with that. It's it's

0:29:55.760 --> 0:29:59.760
<v Speaker 1>something that it fills my my heart to be able to,

0:30:00.120 --> 0:30:03.280
<v Speaker 1>you know, give that to other people. So I will

0:30:03.480 --> 0:30:06.680
<v Speaker 1>take that. I'm actually high. Wrote down up a list

0:30:06.720 --> 0:30:09.720
<v Speaker 1>of things that you said today. Um. Dr Jennifer Free,

0:30:09.760 --> 0:30:11.760
<v Speaker 1>thank you so much for calling in. Thank you for

0:30:11.800 --> 0:30:14.000
<v Speaker 1>all of your advice. Um. So, I can't wait for

0:30:14.000 --> 0:30:18.040
<v Speaker 1>the six months to clear and for me to detox

0:30:18.120 --> 0:30:20.120
<v Speaker 1>and to find my future husband. Thank you so much

0:30:20.160 --> 0:30:29.480
<v Speaker 1>for calling. Congratulations, Thank you bye. Wow, guys, I can't wait.

0:30:29.560 --> 0:30:31.719
<v Speaker 1>And I was talking to my friend, Um, we're at

0:30:31.720 --> 0:30:34.640
<v Speaker 1>the wedding. My friend got married on Sunday, and we

0:30:34.720 --> 0:30:36.920
<v Speaker 1>look at each other. She's like, I cannot wait to

0:30:37.000 --> 0:30:40.680
<v Speaker 1>give a speech at your wedding. Yeah. And because she's

0:30:40.760 --> 0:30:44.200
<v Speaker 1>she's seen like everything that I've gone through, and I

0:30:44.240 --> 0:30:46.080
<v Speaker 1>guess for some people, it's like, oh, who gives a

0:30:46.360 --> 0:30:49.000
<v Speaker 1>It's a guy that you've known for like a split

0:30:49.160 --> 0:30:51.600
<v Speaker 1>second in your life, not a big deal. But I

0:30:51.600 --> 0:30:53.520
<v Speaker 1>guess it's the idea, Like you know, I guess it's

0:30:53.560 --> 0:30:57.400
<v Speaker 1>the idea. I think I like the idea of him.

0:30:57.440 --> 0:31:01.160
<v Speaker 1>And you know, he wasn't in like our world, in

0:31:01.320 --> 0:31:03.160
<v Speaker 1>like the Batchel the world. He wasn't part of the

0:31:03.200 --> 0:31:08.880
<v Speaker 1>franchise or part of you know that industry. So for me,

0:31:08.920 --> 0:31:10.560
<v Speaker 1>it was like, oh, it's such a breath of fresh air.

0:31:10.600 --> 0:31:12.800
<v Speaker 1>But he he understood where I was coming from and

0:31:12.800 --> 0:31:17.360
<v Speaker 1>and he understood my needs. So I take away from that, um,

0:31:17.400 --> 0:31:21.760
<v Speaker 1>that I could appreciate a person for what they're bringing

0:31:21.800 --> 0:31:28.160
<v Speaker 1>into the relationship and into for you know, to better me. Um.

0:31:28.200 --> 0:31:32.719
<v Speaker 1>But yeah, I mean, heartbreak hurt. It does hurt, and

0:31:32.760 --> 0:31:35.360
<v Speaker 1>I and I think, um, you know, even if you've

0:31:35.360 --> 0:31:37.680
<v Speaker 1>been through in a million times, it's still really painful.

0:31:38.080 --> 0:31:39.520
<v Speaker 1>Like people ask me all the time, like, oh, you

0:31:39.560 --> 0:31:41.760
<v Speaker 1>must be the breakup experts, so you must just get

0:31:41.760 --> 0:31:44.840
<v Speaker 1>over breakups really quickly, and it's like, no, it's not

0:31:44.920 --> 0:31:48.720
<v Speaker 1>how it works, Like it's totally democratic. Everyone gets heartbroken

0:31:48.760 --> 0:31:53.600
<v Speaker 1>and it's still painful. But this guy came along because

0:31:53.640 --> 0:31:57.360
<v Speaker 1>he needed to show you this very important lesson or information.

0:31:57.760 --> 0:31:59.840
<v Speaker 1>And that's why it impacts you so much or you're

0:31:59.840 --> 0:32:05.800
<v Speaker 1>so because subconsciously you know that like something's happening, something happening,

0:32:05.800 --> 0:32:09.000
<v Speaker 1>this means something. And then we just displaced everything and

0:32:09.000 --> 0:32:10.960
<v Speaker 1>we get it all jumbled. Yeah. Absolutely, And that's what

0:32:11.000 --> 0:32:13.600
<v Speaker 1>I was trying to figure out too, Like I you know,

0:32:13.840 --> 0:32:16.600
<v Speaker 1>I've spoken about this on my Instagram and stuff. Um, Like,

0:32:16.880 --> 0:32:18.880
<v Speaker 1>sometimes I get anxiety, and this morning I woke up

0:32:18.920 --> 0:32:20.920
<v Speaker 1>with a ton of anxiety in my heart, like you

0:32:20.960 --> 0:32:23.280
<v Speaker 1>could have if you're sleeping next to me. My bed

0:32:23.440 --> 0:32:26.880
<v Speaker 1>was like and I woke up and I'm like, okay,

0:32:26.880 --> 0:32:28.440
<v Speaker 1>I just gotta cry it out. So I cried it out,

0:32:28.440 --> 0:32:30.560
<v Speaker 1>and I'm like, where is this anxiety coming from? You know?

0:32:30.560 --> 0:32:33.360
<v Speaker 1>And I think it it comes from a bunch of

0:32:33.400 --> 0:32:38.000
<v Speaker 1>different places. Obviously, it comes from, um, the idea, the

0:32:38.000 --> 0:32:41.760
<v Speaker 1>the the ending of the idea of something just sucks, right,

0:32:42.000 --> 0:32:46.800
<v Speaker 1>And I think mourning it's the the death of someone

0:32:47.040 --> 0:32:50.120
<v Speaker 1>or the ending of mourning anything. It's just it's hard

0:32:50.160 --> 0:32:52.640
<v Speaker 1>to do and hard to process. Yeah, it's grieving. I mean,

0:32:52.680 --> 0:32:54.720
<v Speaker 1>even if you weren't in a long term relationship with

0:32:54.760 --> 0:32:58.400
<v Speaker 1>this person. You weren't necessarily mourning them, You were mourning

0:32:58.480 --> 0:33:02.120
<v Speaker 1>the idea of what could have been. Right. Um, but

0:33:02.200 --> 0:33:04.640
<v Speaker 1>I think that I do think that the really big

0:33:04.720 --> 0:33:08.440
<v Speaker 1>lesson here is that you do know early on whether

0:33:08.520 --> 0:33:10.640
<v Speaker 1>or not that person is someone that you should invest

0:33:10.680 --> 0:33:13.320
<v Speaker 1>more time in. And that was my mistake because I

0:33:13.320 --> 0:33:15.760
<v Speaker 1>said this from the beginning. I and I told him

0:33:15.760 --> 0:33:20.560
<v Speaker 1>to I'm like, I didn't picture us being anything serious. Yeah,

0:33:20.560 --> 0:33:23.400
<v Speaker 1>I told him, I'm like, I don't picture this going

0:33:23.480 --> 0:33:26.280
<v Speaker 1>anywhere further. But I think it's just like the way

0:33:26.320 --> 0:33:30.240
<v Speaker 1>it happened. Um, I'm very big on respect, So be

0:33:30.440 --> 0:33:33.000
<v Speaker 1>onest and honesty. Just like, tell me what you're feeling, like,

0:33:33.000 --> 0:33:34.400
<v Speaker 1>tell me what you're doing, tell me what you're feeling.

0:33:34.440 --> 0:33:36.600
<v Speaker 1>Let's just like be too mature adults here and and

0:33:36.640 --> 0:33:39.080
<v Speaker 1>be honest with it. So I think that's where I was, like,

0:33:39.240 --> 0:33:41.960
<v Speaker 1>I feel disrespected because you weren't honest with me. I

0:33:41.960 --> 0:33:44.120
<v Speaker 1>want Mark to comment on this, because I think guys

0:33:44.800 --> 0:33:47.680
<v Speaker 1>aren't feeling what we feel. Oh yeah, acous, they don't

0:33:47.720 --> 0:33:49.840
<v Speaker 1>feel what we feel. As I get older, I realized

0:33:49.840 --> 0:33:53.520
<v Speaker 1>like we are really really different the way they handle

0:33:53.560 --> 0:33:55.160
<v Speaker 1>things the way they look at things. They can do

0:33:55.240 --> 0:33:57.720
<v Speaker 1>things like the lights, and that's not a bad thing.

0:33:57.720 --> 0:34:01.640
<v Speaker 1>We just have to accept that. It's like I always say,

0:34:01.680 --> 0:34:03.959
<v Speaker 1>it's like you're speaking of foreign language, like they're like,

0:34:04.160 --> 0:34:06.360
<v Speaker 1>I don't know what you're talking about. Or it's like

0:34:07.000 --> 0:34:10.760
<v Speaker 1>trying to make a left handed person a right handed person. Listen,

0:34:11.320 --> 0:34:13.400
<v Speaker 1>do you think he's going to be sick? Like, do

0:34:13.400 --> 0:34:16.320
<v Speaker 1>you think right now I'm talking about him, I highly

0:34:16.440 --> 0:34:18.919
<v Speaker 1>doubt he's sitting around with his friends out for cough

0:34:19.000 --> 0:34:21.440
<v Speaker 1>and be like, oh so Vanessa, like you know, I

0:34:21.480 --> 0:34:24.080
<v Speaker 1>decided to end him with horror cales long ago. No,

0:34:24.160 --> 0:34:26.680
<v Speaker 1>he's not doing that. He's probably watching football or whatever

0:34:26.840 --> 0:34:31.319
<v Speaker 1>sport is playing on it. So I don't know if

0:34:31.320 --> 0:34:33.960
<v Speaker 1>that's true or not, because I'm an overthinker and I

0:34:34.000 --> 0:34:35.880
<v Speaker 1>tend to overthink, and I tend to be a talker,

0:34:35.960 --> 0:34:38.080
<v Speaker 1>so I tend to talk it out. I bore my friends.

0:34:38.120 --> 0:34:40.319
<v Speaker 1>I mean, this is all a long time ago now,

0:34:40.400 --> 0:34:42.279
<v Speaker 1>but I used to really talk about my friend, my

0:34:42.320 --> 0:34:44.439
<v Speaker 1>poor friend Kurt. Oh my gosh, he used to listen

0:34:44.480 --> 0:34:47.080
<v Speaker 1>to me wine and about different girls, over and over

0:34:47.120 --> 0:34:51.680
<v Speaker 1>and over again. Slingers. Yeah, it was a lot like that,

0:34:51.800 --> 0:34:55.359
<v Speaker 1>so I think that I think it depends on the guy. Yeah,

0:34:55.560 --> 0:34:57.279
<v Speaker 1>and I think Easton's probably a lot like me. I

0:34:57.280 --> 0:34:59.640
<v Speaker 1>think he's an emotional guy as well. Yeah, I'm very

0:34:59.640 --> 0:35:03.200
<v Speaker 1>in touched my feelings. That's why none of us are

0:35:03.239 --> 0:35:09.200
<v Speaker 1>attracted to either of you. No, but that's a good point.

0:35:09.239 --> 0:35:12.560
<v Speaker 1>But it does depend on the person, right, And there

0:35:12.600 --> 0:35:15.319
<v Speaker 1>are women that are not in touch with their emotions, right,

0:35:15.560 --> 0:35:18.920
<v Speaker 1>I know. But it's like, and the thing is that

0:35:18.960 --> 0:35:21.080
<v Speaker 1>I was say, I was telling Mark this before. I

0:35:21.120 --> 0:35:24.120
<v Speaker 1>think I'm and I'm making a vision board this weekend

0:35:24.120 --> 0:35:27.439
<v Speaker 1>when I go back home, and I'm gonna be more

0:35:27.520 --> 0:35:30.759
<v Speaker 1>specific about the things that i want, not only romantically,

0:35:30.800 --> 0:35:33.600
<v Speaker 1>but career wise. And I've been traveling so much, and

0:35:33.640 --> 0:35:35.879
<v Speaker 1>I lived in l A. I was living back home

0:35:35.920 --> 0:35:38.399
<v Speaker 1>and I kept flip flopping. And I want to feel

0:35:38.400 --> 0:35:41.480
<v Speaker 1>more grounded with my decisions and where I am. What

0:35:41.520 --> 0:35:45.600
<v Speaker 1>do you focused on? You? There's a lot of like

0:35:45.960 --> 0:35:47.640
<v Speaker 1>I need to figure out what I want. I'd be

0:35:47.640 --> 0:35:49.520
<v Speaker 1>specific about what I want. What I mean, I mean

0:35:50.440 --> 0:35:53.600
<v Speaker 1>what if you just is that how I look? Do

0:35:53.680 --> 0:35:59.680
<v Speaker 1>it a little bit chilled? And I knew what you're worth.

0:36:00.040 --> 0:36:03.200
<v Speaker 1>I think googling these articles because obviously I share like

0:36:03.360 --> 0:36:06.560
<v Speaker 1>the same diseases that you have. But it's like we

0:36:06.640 --> 0:36:10.120
<v Speaker 1>are so unkind to ourselves. So what if you just

0:36:10.200 --> 0:36:13.920
<v Speaker 1>said it's all okay, yeah, Like that's what I'm just

0:36:14.040 --> 0:36:16.399
<v Speaker 1>encouraging you because I think, yeah, go make your vision

0:36:16.400 --> 0:36:18.200
<v Speaker 1>board and write it down eighties seven times. And then

0:36:18.600 --> 0:36:20.640
<v Speaker 1>it's like it's so much pressure on you, Like you're

0:36:20.640 --> 0:36:22.960
<v Speaker 1>putting pressure on you to make the vision board and

0:36:23.040 --> 0:36:26.840
<v Speaker 1>like get it right this time, Vanessa, don't. I wouldn't know,

0:36:26.920 --> 0:36:28.799
<v Speaker 1>but I wouldn't say that kind of pressure. I think

0:36:28.800 --> 0:36:31.120
<v Speaker 1>it's like I have a lot of self love. I

0:36:31.200 --> 0:36:35.239
<v Speaker 1>know my self worth. I like, UM, I feel like

0:36:35.280 --> 0:36:39.520
<v Speaker 1>I do UM. I just think even just career wise,

0:36:39.560 --> 0:36:41.440
<v Speaker 1>like there's a lot of things right now, there's a

0:36:41.480 --> 0:36:44.319
<v Speaker 1>lot of opportunities coming my way, but it's like I'm

0:36:44.320 --> 0:36:46.080
<v Speaker 1>not a hunch of percent happy with that one or

0:36:46.080 --> 0:36:47.759
<v Speaker 1>that one or that one. So I want to be

0:36:47.800 --> 0:36:50.400
<v Speaker 1>more specific with my intentions. That's all I'm saying, Like

0:36:50.440 --> 0:36:54.160
<v Speaker 1>my vision board in terms of like you know, planning

0:36:54.200 --> 0:36:56.759
<v Speaker 1>things out, I guess with what I want. I think

0:36:56.760 --> 0:37:00.280
<v Speaker 1>you also have to be um. Just like the flip

0:37:00.280 --> 0:37:02.520
<v Speaker 1>side of it, you also have to reject and say

0:37:02.600 --> 0:37:04.960
<v Speaker 1>no and walk away from the things that aren't right

0:37:05.000 --> 0:37:09.040
<v Speaker 1>for you. Um. I think maybe that's, you know, the

0:37:09.080 --> 0:37:11.040
<v Speaker 1>biggest lesson that you've learned out of the people that

0:37:11.080 --> 0:37:13.080
<v Speaker 1>you've dated, and so the next time you're faced with

0:37:13.120 --> 0:37:18.440
<v Speaker 1>that there was there were so many signs, there were

0:37:18.480 --> 0:37:21.719
<v Speaker 1>so many signs we just we had uh. He was

0:37:21.800 --> 0:37:24.080
<v Speaker 1>very funny. We had kind of the same sense of humor,

0:37:24.160 --> 0:37:26.799
<v Speaker 1>but he kind of went off sometimes with his It

0:37:26.840 --> 0:37:29.200
<v Speaker 1>was a little bit crude and disrespectful, and I'm like that,

0:37:29.280 --> 0:37:32.480
<v Speaker 1>I'm not like, I'm sorry, I'm my Italian blood started

0:37:32.520 --> 0:37:34.440
<v Speaker 1>boiling and I was like, I'm not going to take that,

0:37:34.520 --> 0:37:37.560
<v Speaker 1>and but then I did. I was like, I'm so stupid, right.

0:37:38.239 --> 0:37:40.120
<v Speaker 1>But I think that when you I think when you

0:37:40.160 --> 0:37:42.520
<v Speaker 1>do walk away from that next time, I think that's

0:37:42.520 --> 0:37:45.440
<v Speaker 1>when you start being rewarded for for that decision making,

0:37:45.480 --> 0:37:48.040
<v Speaker 1>you know, And until you do that, I don't think

0:37:48.080 --> 0:37:50.480
<v Speaker 1>the lesson is fully even learned. I have a question

0:37:51.040 --> 0:37:55.360
<v Speaker 1>for everyone in this room and everyone listening. So, um,

0:37:55.400 --> 0:37:58.480
<v Speaker 1>he actually, well, I'm not gonna say he, but someone

0:37:59.000 --> 0:38:03.520
<v Speaker 1>told me that eight cheated on their significant other and

0:38:03.560 --> 0:38:07.440
<v Speaker 1>then broke up with them but never told them that

0:38:07.520 --> 0:38:09.359
<v Speaker 1>they cheated on them, because they're like, well, if I'm

0:38:09.360 --> 0:38:11.160
<v Speaker 1>breaking up with them, what's the point of me telling

0:38:11.200 --> 0:38:13.839
<v Speaker 1>them that I cheated on them? Oh? You guys agree

0:38:13.880 --> 0:38:17.359
<v Speaker 1>with that? That? Oh? I was like, what there might

0:38:17.400 --> 0:38:22.440
<v Speaker 1>be around now? I'm saying, like, I find it if

0:38:22.520 --> 0:38:24.120
<v Speaker 1>you know, and this is the thing like that, And

0:38:24.280 --> 0:38:26.520
<v Speaker 1>I had this discussion with Dean and Jared and like,

0:38:26.680 --> 0:38:31.200
<v Speaker 1>I want to be the person that's breaking up with

0:38:31.400 --> 0:38:33.920
<v Speaker 1>the other person, not the other way around. Because if

0:38:33.960 --> 0:38:36.839
<v Speaker 1>you're breaking up with me, you've had time to think

0:38:36.840 --> 0:38:39.640
<v Speaker 1>about it, you've had time to process it, and you

0:38:39.719 --> 0:38:41.960
<v Speaker 1>have you've had time to like kind of get over it,

0:38:42.200 --> 0:38:43.839
<v Speaker 1>and then you're going to break up with me. So

0:38:43.880 --> 0:38:46.640
<v Speaker 1>why so you want if someone breaks up with you,

0:38:47.640 --> 0:38:49.000
<v Speaker 1>you want them to say and by the way, while

0:38:49.000 --> 0:38:51.799
<v Speaker 1>we were together, right, No, okay, this is okay. I

0:38:51.840 --> 0:38:54.080
<v Speaker 1>think you guys are getting I'm not explaining myself to

0:38:54.160 --> 0:38:56.520
<v Speaker 1>what would I feel like that would be helpful? I

0:38:56.560 --> 0:38:59.120
<v Speaker 1>just I wouldn't cheat, first of all. Second of all,

0:38:59.360 --> 0:39:03.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm saying, isn't that a warning sign that the person

0:39:03.719 --> 0:39:08.160
<v Speaker 1>is able if it is able to cheat on the

0:39:08.200 --> 0:39:10.279
<v Speaker 1>person they know they're breaking up with, just break up

0:39:10.280 --> 0:39:12.200
<v Speaker 1>with them first and then go to someone. It's like

0:39:12.239 --> 0:39:14.279
<v Speaker 1>you're trying to make that person that's breaking up with

0:39:14.280 --> 0:39:17.640
<v Speaker 1>you like a worse person, like or something. No, I

0:39:17.680 --> 0:39:20.600
<v Speaker 1>think it vindicated and like, well he broke up with me,

0:39:20.640 --> 0:39:23.399
<v Speaker 1>but I didn't want him anyway. No, I just think

0:39:23.440 --> 0:39:26.400
<v Speaker 1>it's a warning sign. If someone that you're you're dating

0:39:26.600 --> 0:39:28.879
<v Speaker 1>tells you this and you're like, oh, so wait, you're

0:39:29.480 --> 0:39:31.480
<v Speaker 1>is it hard for you to be faithful? That's a

0:39:31.520 --> 0:39:34.560
<v Speaker 1>major red flag. If someone tells you that, yeah, of course, like,

0:39:34.560 --> 0:39:36.239
<v Speaker 1>oh I cheated on her, then I then I left

0:39:36.239 --> 0:39:40.120
<v Speaker 1>her white you know what I mean. I'd be like, well,

0:39:40.640 --> 0:39:44.320
<v Speaker 1>why are you telling me this? Like okay, cool. Second

0:39:44.360 --> 0:39:47.840
<v Speaker 1>of all, just leave her and then there's plenty of

0:39:48.000 --> 0:39:50.879
<v Speaker 1>women with open legs that you can run to, Like,

0:39:51.040 --> 0:39:53.320
<v Speaker 1>I don't understand, why do you have to do before

0:39:54.040 --> 0:39:59.480
<v Speaker 1>and then break up with her rights talking about it,

0:39:59.560 --> 0:40:02.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm saying, why cheat if you know you're going to

0:40:02.320 --> 0:40:05.520
<v Speaker 1>break up with the person anyway, Just leave this monkey

0:40:05.520 --> 0:40:07.840
<v Speaker 1>branching like they want they want to have something stable,

0:40:07.880 --> 0:40:09.600
<v Speaker 1>and then they want to leap to something else stable

0:40:09.640 --> 0:40:11.640
<v Speaker 1>and they're cheating while this is falling apart, but they

0:40:11.680 --> 0:40:12.920
<v Speaker 1>want to keep it going because they don't want to

0:40:12.920 --> 0:40:15.400
<v Speaker 1>be alone. It's a fear of being alone. I guess

0:40:15.480 --> 0:40:17.960
<v Speaker 1>I don't even think it's the cheating thing. Like I

0:40:17.960 --> 0:40:19.920
<v Speaker 1>think you're focusing on the wrong thing. Like you said, like,

0:40:19.920 --> 0:40:22.319
<v Speaker 1>why would you tell someone that? Like is that his

0:40:22.440 --> 0:40:26.600
<v Speaker 1>game to tell the girl he's dating that he did that?

0:40:26.600 --> 0:40:32.080
<v Speaker 1>That's like I think you should have kind of ran. No, no,

0:40:32.120 --> 0:40:34.600
<v Speaker 1>I know, but what he told you that, right, he

0:40:34.719 --> 0:40:38.120
<v Speaker 1>told it's like a friend. It happened to a friend

0:40:38.160 --> 0:40:40.799
<v Speaker 1>of mine. Yeah, And I was like, you should run,

0:40:40.920 --> 0:40:42.480
<v Speaker 1>but see, and that's the thing. And I was like,

0:40:42.520 --> 0:40:44.320
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if I should give her advice because

0:40:44.360 --> 0:40:46.319
<v Speaker 1>I'm very black and white, so I would have been

0:40:46.360 --> 0:40:50.000
<v Speaker 1>like nope, yeah, like run, yeah. I mean, I think everybody,

0:40:50.080 --> 0:40:52.439
<v Speaker 1>everybody has a different place on the spectrum in terms

0:40:52.480 --> 0:40:54.480
<v Speaker 1>of cheating. But I feel like if that rubs you

0:40:54.560 --> 0:40:57.800
<v Speaker 1>the wrong way, you just have to follow your intuition

0:40:57.880 --> 0:41:00.359
<v Speaker 1>on it. I was like that that's a major it's

0:41:00.360 --> 0:41:02.399
<v Speaker 1>a red flag for you to subscribe to. Once a cheat,

0:41:02.400 --> 0:41:09.640
<v Speaker 1>are always a cheater, um on a cheater. So you've

0:41:09.680 --> 0:41:12.720
<v Speaker 1>never cheated on anyone ever before? Even high school? Anytime? Nothing?

0:41:12.840 --> 0:41:15.239
<v Speaker 1>No high school and my first kiss was like when

0:41:15.280 --> 0:41:19.920
<v Speaker 1>I was sixte seventeen, eighteen. Um, No, I've never cheated

0:41:19.960 --> 0:41:22.960
<v Speaker 1>on anyone. I think I have way too much guilt.

0:41:23.400 --> 0:41:27.319
<v Speaker 1>Um my, my, my conscious would not I would not

0:41:27.360 --> 0:41:29.439
<v Speaker 1>be able to see that at night. Um So, I've

0:41:29.520 --> 0:41:34.399
<v Speaker 1>never personally cheated on anyone, and I don't think I've

0:41:34.400 --> 0:41:37.719
<v Speaker 1>been cheated on. But now I've heard a story like

0:41:37.760 --> 0:41:40.120
<v Speaker 1>this that happened to my friend, and I was like, oh,

0:41:40.160 --> 0:41:43.400
<v Speaker 1>what if a guy was breaking up with me and

0:41:43.520 --> 0:41:45.879
<v Speaker 1>was sleeping with someone else the week before, or even

0:41:45.880 --> 0:41:49.439
<v Speaker 1>to be cheated on you? I just never told relationship ended.

0:41:49.560 --> 0:41:54.839
<v Speaker 1>You would not want to know if your wife, if

0:41:54.880 --> 0:41:58.000
<v Speaker 1>your boyfriend it's cheating. I think it's water under the

0:41:58.000 --> 0:42:02.440
<v Speaker 1>bridge if the relationship is over anyway, Okay, I would

0:42:02.440 --> 0:42:06.160
<v Speaker 1>like to know if my wife is cheating at Amy.

0:42:06.200 --> 0:42:10.799
<v Speaker 1>I hope you're listening. I think there's a lot of

0:42:10.840 --> 0:42:14.520
<v Speaker 1>black and white with you, which I respect. Relationships for

0:42:14.600 --> 0:42:16.799
<v Speaker 1>me are a whole bunch of grey. I know, and

0:42:16.880 --> 0:42:19.400
<v Speaker 1>that's the issue. But that's the issue. That's why. Like,

0:42:19.400 --> 0:42:22.120
<v Speaker 1>I've had the same friends since I was like five,

0:42:22.280 --> 0:42:24.640
<v Speaker 1>you know, like my I'm super close to my family.

0:42:25.080 --> 0:42:29.920
<v Speaker 1>I like I loyalty to me, is so big. Um.

0:42:29.960 --> 0:42:31.919
<v Speaker 1>And then you know, you start dating and of course

0:42:31.960 --> 0:42:35.040
<v Speaker 1>as those areas of gray and listen, when I was

0:42:35.080 --> 0:42:37.040
<v Speaker 1>on The Bachelor, that was the first time I did

0:42:37.080 --> 0:42:40.120
<v Speaker 1>therapy and the therapist was like, Vanessa, you have to

0:42:40.160 --> 0:42:43.120
<v Speaker 1>start learning to like swim in those gray areas. And

0:42:43.160 --> 0:42:45.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, I don't want to do it. It's so uncomfortable.

0:42:45.440 --> 0:42:48.600
<v Speaker 1>I can't lean into that. But I'm I'm starting to

0:42:49.040 --> 0:42:51.800
<v Speaker 1>definitely starting to do. You when you start dating someone,

0:42:51.880 --> 0:42:54.160
<v Speaker 1>is that something that you talk about, like what your

0:42:54.239 --> 0:42:58.160
<v Speaker 1>boundaries are what you consider cheating? No, like micro cheating,

0:42:58.200 --> 0:43:01.400
<v Speaker 1>because there's a whole gray area of micro cheating too.

0:43:01.600 --> 0:43:04.719
<v Speaker 1>What's micro cheating? Micro cheating is like when it's not

0:43:05.080 --> 0:43:08.440
<v Speaker 1>really overt cheating, like maybe you're not sleeping with someone,

0:43:08.600 --> 0:43:14.320
<v Speaker 1>but you yeah, like having an emotional affair kind tender

0:43:14.600 --> 0:43:17.880
<v Speaker 1>rya and stuff. Uh, it could be like it's different

0:43:17.920 --> 0:43:20.640
<v Speaker 1>for everyone, but um, I think everyone has a different

0:43:20.640 --> 0:43:24.280
<v Speaker 1>measure of what what is considered cheating, Which is why

0:43:24.320 --> 0:43:26.719
<v Speaker 1>if you know this about yourself, that loyalty is so

0:43:26.760 --> 0:43:30.680
<v Speaker 1>important to you and that's something that you really value. Um,

0:43:30.719 --> 0:43:33.040
<v Speaker 1>that should be a point of conversation when you're starting

0:43:33.040 --> 0:43:37.439
<v Speaker 1>to date someone like wh did limb here? Okay? I

0:43:37.480 --> 0:43:42.359
<v Speaker 1>think there's all sort of things that people need, and

0:43:42.440 --> 0:43:47.000
<v Speaker 1>I think you have an immense need for certainty. It's like, okay,

0:43:47.040 --> 0:43:48.520
<v Speaker 1>let me let me give an example. When you break

0:43:48.560 --> 0:43:50.400
<v Speaker 1>up with someone, do you look at their Instagram or

0:43:50.440 --> 0:43:54.040
<v Speaker 1>their Facebook? So you don't know my willpower? Girl is

0:43:54.080 --> 0:43:57.360
<v Speaker 1>so strong? Okay, someone breaks up with you, do you

0:43:57.440 --> 0:44:00.960
<v Speaker 1>have that? Why? Why? Oh are they doing now? No?

0:44:01.160 --> 0:44:03.560
<v Speaker 1>I don't ask what they're doing now? Ever, I actually

0:44:03.560 --> 0:44:05.719
<v Speaker 1>don't care. And that's the thing like once, once it's

0:44:05.760 --> 0:44:08.359
<v Speaker 1>over for me, it's over, and I think that's where

0:44:08.360 --> 0:44:11.359
<v Speaker 1>it becomes black and white. I'll never ever go back

0:44:11.440 --> 0:44:14.880
<v Speaker 1>to someone I dated because I'm like, listen to the timing. No,

0:44:15.120 --> 0:44:18.800
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, it's over. I'm like, no, it doesn't. It doesn't.

0:44:18.800 --> 0:44:21.520
<v Speaker 1>There's time and place maybe years down the line, but not.

0:44:22.160 --> 0:44:24.200
<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh, is anybody else going to help me

0:44:24.400 --> 0:44:29.000
<v Speaker 1>that she's very when it's like if she loosened up,

0:44:29.440 --> 0:44:31.320
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. I'm just no girl, I am tight.

0:44:31.440 --> 0:44:34.560
<v Speaker 1>Let me tell you. I don't know. Mark. I agree

0:44:34.600 --> 0:44:36.719
<v Speaker 1>that maybe there is the time and place could be

0:44:36.760 --> 0:44:38.839
<v Speaker 1>wrong for certain people. Are there people from your past?

0:44:38.880 --> 0:44:45.719
<v Speaker 1>You pine over like the one that got away. No, none, zero, no, No,

0:44:45.960 --> 0:44:49.120
<v Speaker 1>I'm all about moving forward. There's anything wrong with that.

0:44:49.520 --> 0:44:51.560
<v Speaker 1>I don't think that's a bad thing. Yeah, I really don't.

0:44:51.840 --> 0:44:54.400
<v Speaker 1>And listen, there's no I'm not like un lonely. I

0:44:54.440 --> 0:44:56.040
<v Speaker 1>want to get I want to be with someone. If

0:44:56.080 --> 0:44:58.120
<v Speaker 1>I really did, yeah, i'd have a i'd have a

0:44:58.120 --> 0:45:00.319
<v Speaker 1>guy right now, or i'd be dating someone that that

0:45:00.560 --> 0:45:03.160
<v Speaker 1>you know I dated. Like no, I'm proud to say

0:45:03.200 --> 0:45:07.120
<v Speaker 1>that I don't like going back to people that I've dated.

0:45:07.640 --> 0:45:11.080
<v Speaker 1>And there's nothing wrong with that. What about so you've

0:45:11.080 --> 0:45:15.040
<v Speaker 1>never had like your friends with benefits like nobody just

0:45:15.120 --> 0:45:17.239
<v Speaker 1>kind of if you Saturday night, not even for the

0:45:17.280 --> 0:45:20.520
<v Speaker 1>benefits that are typical Saturday night, you need a date

0:45:20.520 --> 0:45:23.400
<v Speaker 1>for something, there's a guy you can call. Oh, I

0:45:23.440 --> 0:45:26.560
<v Speaker 1>mean yeah, but nothing sexually is going to happen. Yeah,

0:45:26.719 --> 0:45:30.920
<v Speaker 1>that's too great experimenting, Yes, that's experiment because like what

0:45:30.920 --> 0:45:34.560
<v Speaker 1>we're doing is not working. So what if you tried

0:45:34.600 --> 0:45:37.120
<v Speaker 1>some of these things? What if you maybe just were

0:45:37.160 --> 0:45:39.279
<v Speaker 1>a little bit more like, well, maybe I'll just try

0:45:39.320 --> 0:45:40.400
<v Speaker 1>and make it out with that guy. You don't have

0:45:40.400 --> 0:45:42.640
<v Speaker 1>to be like oh making out sure, whatever, But I'm

0:45:42.640 --> 0:45:46.160
<v Speaker 1>saying he's not getting in my pants, that's fine. Yeah,

0:45:46.360 --> 0:45:51.200
<v Speaker 1>Or what if maybe maybe there's someone from your past

0:45:51.239 --> 0:45:54.200
<v Speaker 1>that you called to what I don't know, go out

0:45:54.200 --> 0:45:56.640
<v Speaker 1>to dinner, see what happens. I tried that once and

0:45:56.719 --> 0:45:59.360
<v Speaker 1>I was like, we're just at two different places. Still.

0:46:00.120 --> 0:46:02.560
<v Speaker 1>Do you guys know that meme about going back to

0:46:02.760 --> 0:46:07.480
<v Speaker 1>McDonald's stage, yes, reheating yourself fries like yeah, yeah, yeah,

0:46:07.520 --> 0:46:10.560
<v Speaker 1>I saw that. That was like recently on Instagram. Yeah.

0:46:10.760 --> 0:46:13.680
<v Speaker 1>I have that feeling. I feel like, if you if

0:46:13.719 --> 0:46:16.160
<v Speaker 1>it didn't work the first time around, there was a

0:46:16.200 --> 0:46:19.799
<v Speaker 1>clear reason it didn't work. Sometimes there are exceptions and

0:46:19.840 --> 0:46:22.680
<v Speaker 1>someone has changed enough for the situation is enough, But

0:46:22.800 --> 0:46:25.440
<v Speaker 1>it's an exception. Yeah, if it's if it's really all

0:46:25.480 --> 0:46:27.600
<v Speaker 1>about timing and it's like we're a different places in

0:46:27.640 --> 0:46:31.280
<v Speaker 1>our lives, that's one thing. But if it's like, um,

0:46:31.320 --> 0:46:33.120
<v Speaker 1>you know, he didn't want kids. I had an ex

0:46:33.160 --> 0:46:34.839
<v Speaker 1>of mine, the love of my life, didn't want kids.

0:46:34.880 --> 0:46:38.919
<v Speaker 1>Like yeah, a little story, one little story. See look

0:46:38.920 --> 0:46:44.480
<v Speaker 1>behind you see that girl Tanya. Yeah, her parents were married,

0:46:45.640 --> 0:46:49.719
<v Speaker 1>great marriage, three kids, they got divorced. They were divorced

0:46:50.000 --> 0:46:55.560
<v Speaker 1>for ten years. They got remarried to each other and

0:46:55.600 --> 0:46:59.399
<v Speaker 1>are the happiest couple you've ever seen. So I tell

0:46:59.440 --> 0:47:01.320
<v Speaker 1>you that story, Antonia, can you come in for a second.

0:47:01.760 --> 0:47:05.760
<v Speaker 1>So I tell you that story because again, the world

0:47:05.840 --> 0:47:08.000
<v Speaker 1>is not black and white, right, But I mean, ten

0:47:08.080 --> 0:47:11.719
<v Speaker 1>years hasn't passed since I first dated someone. So you said,

0:47:11.719 --> 0:47:13.520
<v Speaker 1>the love of my life, but he didn't want kids.

0:47:13.520 --> 0:47:15.320
<v Speaker 1>So if you're reconnected with that guy, and he's a

0:47:15.360 --> 0:47:21.279
<v Speaker 1>whole different place in his life. And I did just

0:47:21.320 --> 0:47:24.120
<v Speaker 1>tell the story a little bit because I want, I

0:47:24.160 --> 0:47:26.439
<v Speaker 1>just want Vanessa to open her mind a little bit

0:47:26.520 --> 0:47:30.680
<v Speaker 1>and I think things could come to her easier. Uh,

0:47:30.719 --> 0:47:33.799
<v Speaker 1>my parents were married for I don't even know how

0:47:33.760 --> 0:47:36.840
<v Speaker 1>many years before, but they got divorced, like fully divorced,

0:47:36.920 --> 0:47:40.040
<v Speaker 1>like two separate homes from when I was five, and

0:47:40.080 --> 0:47:41.560
<v Speaker 1>then they got back to the when I was fifteen.

0:47:42.000 --> 0:47:43.959
<v Speaker 1>So they were apart for a really really long time.

0:47:44.080 --> 0:47:47.480
<v Speaker 1>They needed that time because I don't even know the

0:47:47.560 --> 0:47:51.440
<v Speaker 1>details of like what all went down, but I know

0:47:51.520 --> 0:47:53.520
<v Speaker 1>that it wasn't like a lack of love or respect,

0:47:54.239 --> 0:47:56.600
<v Speaker 1>and um they got back to other. I would never

0:47:56.680 --> 0:47:59.600
<v Speaker 1>imagine them a partner. Like they're so in loved, so happy.

0:47:59.640 --> 0:48:04.919
<v Speaker 1>They've been re married now for ten years, twelve years more,

0:48:05.960 --> 0:48:08.440
<v Speaker 1>and I can even imagine them apart. I mean, I

0:48:08.480 --> 0:48:10.120
<v Speaker 1>have a friend of mine who has a similar story.

0:48:10.280 --> 0:48:13.680
<v Speaker 1>She her mom got pregnant, they were dating. Her mom

0:48:13.719 --> 0:48:16.919
<v Speaker 1>and her boyfriend were dating. She got pregnant, she had

0:48:17.000 --> 0:48:21.880
<v Speaker 1>my friend, and then they didn't talk for fifteen years,

0:48:22.960 --> 0:48:26.080
<v Speaker 1>and then they reconnected, had another baby, and are now

0:48:26.200 --> 0:48:30.920
<v Speaker 1>back together. So I know it doesn't listen, but I'm saying, like,

0:48:30.960 --> 0:48:32.919
<v Speaker 1>I wouldn't go back to someone I dated a month

0:48:32.960 --> 0:48:35.279
<v Speaker 1>ago or someone I dated, you know, I would need

0:48:35.320 --> 0:48:38.080
<v Speaker 1>time to to to process it and for me to

0:48:38.160 --> 0:48:40.480
<v Speaker 1>be in a place where I'm happy with I like

0:48:41.000 --> 0:48:44.640
<v Speaker 1>when I like being after going through a breakup or

0:48:44.719 --> 0:48:47.239
<v Speaker 1>an ending of something, I like going back to that

0:48:47.239 --> 0:48:50.239
<v Speaker 1>place from like so good on my own and that's

0:48:50.239 --> 0:48:52.799
<v Speaker 1>when and that's where guys end up like coming into

0:48:52.800 --> 0:48:54.120
<v Speaker 1>my life. I never knew I was going to meet

0:48:54.120 --> 0:48:56.160
<v Speaker 1>this guy. It was I was at an event and

0:48:56.200 --> 0:48:58.480
<v Speaker 1>we just like connected. But I was just at a

0:48:58.560 --> 0:49:02.480
<v Speaker 1>really good place, you know. Yeah, you're like on your path,

0:49:02.560 --> 0:49:05.200
<v Speaker 1>in your lane, just enjoying life, and that's when things

0:49:05.200 --> 0:49:08.880
<v Speaker 1>come to you. I believe that when how are you

0:49:08.920 --> 0:49:11.919
<v Speaker 1>normally meeting these guys so the ones that have worked out.

0:49:12.040 --> 0:49:15.960
<v Speaker 1>I'm not on any dating apps. UM, not that I'm

0:49:16.000 --> 0:49:20.200
<v Speaker 1>against it, I just I'm I don't know. I think

0:49:20.239 --> 0:49:22.000
<v Speaker 1>I spent way too much time on my phone to

0:49:22.120 --> 0:49:28.400
<v Speaker 1>start off with. And I love meeting people not organically.

0:49:29.120 --> 0:49:32.200
<v Speaker 1>And maybe this is what Jennifer dr. Jennifer was saying, like, oh,

0:49:32.239 --> 0:49:34.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm going to romanticize the guy I meet at the

0:49:34.120 --> 0:49:37.839
<v Speaker 1>grocery store. But you know, I think, Um, I do

0:49:37.960 --> 0:49:41.919
<v Speaker 1>think things happen for a reason, and you will meet

0:49:42.000 --> 0:49:46.400
<v Speaker 1>people for a reason. Um, so maybe dating app is

0:49:46.480 --> 0:49:48.759
<v Speaker 1>my next my next way to go. I don't know,

0:49:49.480 --> 0:49:52.160
<v Speaker 1>I think you should. I mean, we actually have a

0:49:52.160 --> 0:49:55.640
<v Speaker 1>friend of mine that's just sitting down right now. The

0:49:55.800 --> 0:50:01.480
<v Speaker 1>lovely Brandy Cyrus is in the house. Hi, um, thank

0:50:01.520 --> 0:50:03.920
<v Speaker 1>you for coming in. Actually, she just I'm in l A.

0:50:04.000 --> 0:50:06.720
<v Speaker 1>You just recently you got into l A what yesterday

0:50:06.800 --> 0:50:08.920
<v Speaker 1>or something Sunday night, on Sunday night, and I'm like,

0:50:08.960 --> 0:50:10.239
<v Speaker 1>oh my god, I want you to come on and

0:50:10.280 --> 0:50:15.959
<v Speaker 1>just I'm like, let's bash boys. I'm like, I'm in Um,

0:50:16.000 --> 0:50:19.480
<v Speaker 1>so you're single, I'm single, and so around my birthday

0:50:19.480 --> 0:50:21.960
<v Speaker 1>I messaged Brandy. I'm like, I ate guys, it's like

0:50:22.000 --> 0:50:23.960
<v Speaker 1>what happened. I'm like, this guy that I was talking

0:50:24.000 --> 0:50:27.440
<v Speaker 1>to just send me like the most like generic happy birthday,

0:50:27.440 --> 0:50:30.680
<v Speaker 1>not even a happy born day text message, yeah exactly.

0:50:30.719 --> 0:50:32.239
<v Speaker 1>And I was like I just felt like a piece

0:50:32.280 --> 0:50:34.560
<v Speaker 1>of meat for him. After I was like, guys just suck.

0:50:34.719 --> 0:50:37.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah they do. And I woke up to your text

0:50:37.600 --> 0:50:40.160
<v Speaker 1>and it was like insane timing because when my other

0:50:40.239 --> 0:50:42.600
<v Speaker 1>really good girlfriends just went through like a horrible experience

0:50:42.600 --> 0:50:44.919
<v Speaker 1>with a guy, um, and so I was just like, oh,

0:50:44.960 --> 0:50:47.080
<v Speaker 1>what is this. Like every time I start to think

0:50:47.120 --> 0:50:49.960
<v Speaker 1>like I'm missing out by being single, all my girlfriends

0:50:49.960 --> 0:50:52.560
<v Speaker 1>start having like the worst issues with their guys, and

0:50:52.560 --> 0:50:54.640
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, see, yeah, this is it. I'm better off,

0:50:55.040 --> 0:50:58.200
<v Speaker 1>better off, I know. And I'm like, I people have

0:50:58.239 --> 0:51:00.560
<v Speaker 1>been opening up to me about like their marry their

0:51:00.560 --> 0:51:04.120
<v Speaker 1>marital issues or you know, I've had a couple of

0:51:04.160 --> 0:51:07.920
<v Speaker 1>friends now who ended their engagement a month before their wedding,

0:51:08.480 --> 0:51:11.040
<v Speaker 1>and I'm like, I'd rather be in my position, and

0:51:11.440 --> 0:51:13.080
<v Speaker 1>you know, wake up with the anxiety that I have

0:51:13.200 --> 0:51:14.600
<v Speaker 1>over a guy that I'm like, I know it was

0:51:14.680 --> 0:51:16.960
<v Speaker 1>going to not end up with anyway than being in

0:51:17.239 --> 0:51:21.359
<v Speaker 1>in in those positions, but it's I think everyone has

0:51:21.400 --> 0:51:23.960
<v Speaker 1>a story and we all are going through our own

0:51:24.200 --> 0:51:29.040
<v Speaker 1>romantic issues. You know, can you look back now, and

0:51:29.080 --> 0:51:31.040
<v Speaker 1>I don't want to like bring up a bad topic,

0:51:31.080 --> 0:51:35.000
<v Speaker 1>but look back on your engagement to Nick. Looking back now,

0:51:35.600 --> 0:51:37.960
<v Speaker 1>do you see are you able to have clarity on

0:51:38.160 --> 0:51:44.480
<v Speaker 1>why it didn't want? I mean yes, So can we

0:51:44.640 --> 0:51:50.280
<v Speaker 1>not try just trusting that everything's happening exactly how I listen?

0:51:50.480 --> 0:51:54.319
<v Speaker 1>I I always say that, um, and I said this

0:51:54.360 --> 0:51:56.400
<v Speaker 1>while I was on the show. I said, every heartbreak

0:51:56.440 --> 0:51:59.560
<v Speaker 1>that I went through led me to being on the show,

0:52:00.200 --> 0:52:02.440
<v Speaker 1>meet to meeting you guys, lead me to be you know,

0:52:02.560 --> 0:52:06.200
<v Speaker 1>like I do believe in that stuff. I really really do.

0:52:06.280 --> 0:52:08.799
<v Speaker 1>But in the moment, like it's stings, and I'm like,

0:52:08.880 --> 0:52:11.120
<v Speaker 1>I'm not someone that's like, oh, I'm just gonna like

0:52:11.640 --> 0:52:13.600
<v Speaker 1>not think about how I'm feeling and just go on

0:52:13.680 --> 0:52:15.879
<v Speaker 1>with my day. I'm like, no, I'm feeling like this,

0:52:16.160 --> 0:52:18.240
<v Speaker 1>and I'm gonna feel sorry for myself for five minutes

0:52:18.400 --> 0:52:21.719
<v Speaker 1>and then I'll go on with my day. Yeah that's good.

0:52:21.840 --> 0:52:23.560
<v Speaker 1>But yeah, I think it's good to like definitely process

0:52:23.600 --> 0:52:25.799
<v Speaker 1>all your feelings before you move on. But I do

0:52:25.920 --> 0:52:28.120
<v Speaker 1>think that playing off what Amy said, there is something

0:52:28.160 --> 0:52:31.480
<v Speaker 1>to say about like looking back on all my relationships,

0:52:31.520 --> 0:52:33.799
<v Speaker 1>every single one, Like the minute you meet somebody knew,

0:52:33.840 --> 0:52:35.560
<v Speaker 1>you realize why I didn't work out with the last one.

0:52:35.880 --> 0:52:37.319
<v Speaker 1>And so it's like, even though you don't have someone

0:52:37.320 --> 0:52:39.640
<v Speaker 1>new right now, like you have to keep that belief

0:52:39.719 --> 0:52:41.360
<v Speaker 1>that when you do meet the next person or the

0:52:41.440 --> 0:52:43.200
<v Speaker 1>right person or whoever it is, that all the other

0:52:43.239 --> 0:52:46.560
<v Speaker 1>ones that failed, it's going to make complete sense. You know.

0:52:46.880 --> 0:52:50.320
<v Speaker 1>So are you dating anyone? No bleak out here. Although

0:52:50.520 --> 0:52:54.120
<v Speaker 1>I did just move to Denver, Menver, and I'm very

0:52:55.200 --> 0:52:57.520
<v Speaker 1>when you told me this, I was like, huh, You're like,

0:52:57.600 --> 0:53:00.279
<v Speaker 1>come come visit on like on the next there is

0:53:00.320 --> 0:53:02.200
<v Speaker 1>a good things to be single. I moved there on

0:53:02.239 --> 0:53:04.479
<v Speaker 1>Thursday and then had to fly here Sunday. But those

0:53:04.520 --> 0:53:06.759
<v Speaker 1>three days, even just those three days are hot men

0:53:06.840 --> 0:53:09.719
<v Speaker 1>everywhere really Already my mom came to help me move in,

0:53:10.239 --> 0:53:12.439
<v Speaker 1>and we were leaving my apartment building to go see

0:53:12.480 --> 0:53:15.719
<v Speaker 1>my sister's show, and this like gorgeous dude was like

0:53:15.760 --> 0:53:17.960
<v Speaker 1>coming in from a run. He was like helping this

0:53:18.000 --> 0:53:20.239
<v Speaker 1>old lady with her pup. Like I was like, oh

0:53:20.280 --> 0:53:22.719
<v Speaker 1>my god, I was like, that's my husband. He listed

0:53:22.760 --> 0:53:24.680
<v Speaker 1>my building and my mom was like, you gotta find

0:53:24.680 --> 0:53:27.719
<v Speaker 1>out who that is already, and then went to your mom.

0:53:27.840 --> 0:53:30.200
<v Speaker 1>By the way, it's just like I love her, you know,

0:53:30.239 --> 0:53:32.879
<v Speaker 1>you gotta get her on this podcast. Yeah, um, but

0:53:32.960 --> 0:53:34.359
<v Speaker 1>yeah she And then we went to a block party

0:53:34.360 --> 0:53:35.880
<v Speaker 1>and they're just like hot guys everywhere. I was like,

0:53:35.960 --> 0:53:38.160
<v Speaker 1>this is where I'm meant to be. There are nineteen

0:53:38.280 --> 0:53:41.920
<v Speaker 1>thousand more available men than women in Denver. What And

0:53:42.040 --> 0:53:44.600
<v Speaker 1>let me tell you, Nashville, where I'm from, is the

0:53:44.640 --> 0:53:47.440
<v Speaker 1>complete opposite. There are no men in nash really, can

0:53:47.520 --> 0:53:51.080
<v Speaker 1>you what are the stats in Montreal? Okay, because I'm

0:53:51.080 --> 0:53:53.120
<v Speaker 1>in Montreal now. First of all, I was in l A.

0:53:55.120 --> 0:53:58.560
<v Speaker 1>We're beautiful people, but just the worst if yeah, Eli

0:53:58.680 --> 0:54:01.239
<v Speaker 1>is rough right, Yeah yeah, I'm the only one yea

0:54:01.920 --> 0:54:03.480
<v Speaker 1>And it was rough. Now I'm back in Montreil and

0:54:03.480 --> 0:54:07.760
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, Brandy's got a real good attitude though she's

0:54:07.800 --> 0:54:11.840
<v Speaker 1>got complete, total certainty that it's all going to happen.

0:54:11.960 --> 0:54:14.760
<v Speaker 1>I understand that asked me. If you would have asked

0:54:14.760 --> 0:54:18.000
<v Speaker 1>me this a couple of months ago, have been like yeah.

0:54:18.200 --> 0:54:24.240
<v Speaker 1>But right now I'm like yeah, break, which is why

0:54:24.520 --> 0:54:27.759
<v Speaker 1>I'm a little bitter guys, and you know what, I'm

0:54:27.760 --> 0:54:29.920
<v Speaker 1>being honest about it. And I said, I want to

0:54:29.920 --> 0:54:31.560
<v Speaker 1>be able to talk about this because a lot of

0:54:31.600 --> 0:54:34.359
<v Speaker 1>people could relate to this, and they're They're like, I don't.

0:54:34.400 --> 0:54:36.279
<v Speaker 1>I don't want to be ashamed to say like I

0:54:36.400 --> 0:54:40.720
<v Speaker 1>was a little but hurt. My ego was bruised. Um,

0:54:40.760 --> 0:54:43.560
<v Speaker 1>are you, Brandy? Are you on on any dating apps?

0:54:43.640 --> 0:54:46.880
<v Speaker 1>I'm not so. I was on ya ya oh you

0:54:46.920 --> 0:54:50.760
<v Speaker 1>were stupid app? Yeah, I was that. Why is it stupid?

0:54:50.840 --> 0:54:53.120
<v Speaker 1>I might I was about to go on, Well, it's

0:54:53.160 --> 0:54:55.319
<v Speaker 1>like it's like the running joke, like people literally writing

0:54:55.360 --> 0:54:57.400
<v Speaker 1>their bios now like this is the app where no

0:54:57.400 --> 0:54:59.680
<v Speaker 1>one talks to each other because it's true, like everyone

0:54:59.719 --> 0:55:01.480
<v Speaker 1>will actually each other and no one will actually start

0:55:01.520 --> 0:55:03.920
<v Speaker 1>a conversation or like actually go on a date. But

0:55:04.000 --> 0:55:09.879
<v Speaker 1>I did go on went on a date. I did

0:55:09.920 --> 0:55:13.200
<v Speaker 1>go on to ride it. So they both suck. They

0:55:13.680 --> 0:55:16.799
<v Speaker 1>hold on. I want to know about this date, about

0:55:16.800 --> 0:55:18.480
<v Speaker 1>the good stuff. Yeah, yeah, it's go with the good.

0:55:18.600 --> 0:55:22.640
<v Speaker 1>So I just joined drya like a couple of weeks ago. Okay, Um,

0:55:22.960 --> 0:55:25.759
<v Speaker 1>after like a lot of convincing and thinking about it.

0:55:25.880 --> 0:55:28.920
<v Speaker 1>What theme song did you choose? Do you have to

0:55:28.960 --> 0:55:33.719
<v Speaker 1>have a song so much work. Yes, yeah, I don't

0:55:33.719 --> 0:55:35.640
<v Speaker 1>know that someone's musical taste has a lot about that.

0:55:35.680 --> 0:55:38.400
<v Speaker 1>Oh yeah, especially in your world too. I actually think

0:55:38.480 --> 0:55:40.960
<v Speaker 1>it's brilliant because you really get a good sense of

0:55:40.960 --> 0:55:44.920
<v Speaker 1>the person. So my song is Leboa. It's very obscure,

0:55:45.040 --> 0:55:47.719
<v Speaker 1>like no one's going to know that it's a Spanish song. Yeah,

0:55:47.760 --> 0:55:51.320
<v Speaker 1>do you want to play it? Right? But still play it?

0:55:51.400 --> 0:55:54.320
<v Speaker 1>And I've like I've mixed together pictures of like myself

0:55:54.360 --> 0:55:57.880
<v Speaker 1>and then like chutty safarita like salsa, so there's like

0:55:57.920 --> 0:55:59.719
<v Speaker 1>a vibe gun. But that tells us a lot about

0:56:01.600 --> 0:56:07.799
<v Speaker 1>Brandy thought my song it was no scrubs. Yeah, yeah,

0:56:07.800 --> 0:56:09.759
<v Speaker 1>that's a good one. I deleted the app. I don't

0:56:09.760 --> 0:56:12.160
<v Speaker 1>have any work, but that was it. Oh so then

0:56:12.160 --> 0:56:13.880
<v Speaker 1>I shouldn't go on I don't know. I had a

0:56:13.880 --> 0:56:16.359
<v Speaker 1>bad experience, okay, so, but L had a good one.

0:56:16.440 --> 0:56:19.000
<v Speaker 1>I think that you can have a bad experience on

0:56:19.040 --> 0:56:22.640
<v Speaker 1>any dating app, right, but I think that, um, I

0:56:22.680 --> 0:56:24.719
<v Speaker 1>think that you should try one since you've never you've

0:56:24.760 --> 0:56:26.719
<v Speaker 1>never been on it, I've never, guys. I was on

0:56:26.800 --> 0:56:29.680
<v Speaker 1>the biggest dating app, The Bachelor, Like, yeah, okay, but

0:56:29.760 --> 0:56:33.520
<v Speaker 1>that's that's true. That is true. But I think you

0:56:33.520 --> 0:56:35.680
<v Speaker 1>have to try. You just have to try it. You

0:56:35.680 --> 0:56:38.880
<v Speaker 1>have to experiment. Yeah, it's something, right, I'm open to

0:56:38.960 --> 0:56:44.239
<v Speaker 1>it now because, um I guess, I guess. Yeah, I

0:56:44.280 --> 0:56:46.840
<v Speaker 1>know that you want to meet someone organically, like to

0:56:47.239 --> 0:56:49.279
<v Speaker 1>bump into them and you like drop something and like

0:56:49.320 --> 0:56:51.319
<v Speaker 1>the whole meat cute from the movie. Like, I get

0:56:51.360 --> 0:56:55.440
<v Speaker 1>that totally because I'm a huge romantic too. But I

0:56:55.480 --> 0:56:57.200
<v Speaker 1>do think you just have to have like a lot

0:56:57.200 --> 0:56:59.680
<v Speaker 1>of different irons from fire. You know, you have to

0:56:59.719 --> 0:57:02.160
<v Speaker 1>like versify. Listen. I said, I was never going to

0:57:02.239 --> 0:57:04.280
<v Speaker 1>do anything like The Bachelor. I went on it worked

0:57:04.280 --> 0:57:06.040
<v Speaker 1>out for me for a short amount of time, so

0:57:06.600 --> 0:57:08.919
<v Speaker 1>could be like nothing. Next is the dating App. I'll

0:57:08.960 --> 0:57:10.840
<v Speaker 1>have so many good stories for you guys if I go.

0:57:11.800 --> 0:57:14.440
<v Speaker 1>I'm going to do it just for the podcast. I

0:57:14.480 --> 0:57:19.439
<v Speaker 1>have Montreal's fats, more women than men in Montreal and

0:57:19.600 --> 0:57:23.080
<v Speaker 1>a sizeable gay male community, which also makes it tough

0:57:23.120 --> 0:57:27.200
<v Speaker 1>to Yeah, girl, I'm I am coming to Denver. You

0:57:27.200 --> 0:57:29.120
<v Speaker 1>got to come. Also, think about the guys that are

0:57:29.160 --> 0:57:33.000
<v Speaker 1>attracted to Denver, like that they're there. They're like men, right,

0:57:33.280 --> 0:57:39.440
<v Speaker 1>like cowboys and dogs and like sports. Yeah, I think. Wait,

0:57:39.560 --> 0:57:41.680
<v Speaker 1>I don't think any of the things we just said.

0:57:41.800 --> 0:57:45.800
<v Speaker 1>But yeah, BENI so you have a lot of friends

0:57:45.800 --> 0:57:48.360
<v Speaker 1>in Denver too. Yeah, so you're saying that your childhood

0:57:48.360 --> 0:57:50.160
<v Speaker 1>friends live in Denver. It wasn't just like I'm moving

0:57:50.160 --> 0:57:53.120
<v Speaker 1>to Denver. There's men. The long story short, I went

0:57:53.160 --> 0:57:55.240
<v Speaker 1>a year ago because I had never been to Red Rocks.

0:57:55.760 --> 0:57:57.960
<v Speaker 1>A friend of mine, his country artist, was playing Red Rocks,

0:57:57.960 --> 0:57:59.439
<v Speaker 1>and I was like, all, great, excuse. So we went

0:57:59.760 --> 0:58:01.560
<v Speaker 1>and ung out for like six days and I loved

0:58:01.600 --> 0:58:04.040
<v Speaker 1>the city and then I've been back like five times

0:58:04.040 --> 0:58:06.480
<v Speaker 1>since then, and every time I was there, it's the

0:58:06.520 --> 0:58:08.840
<v Speaker 1>only place I've ever been that I was sad to leave.

0:58:09.120 --> 0:58:11.680
<v Speaker 1>Usually when I travel, I'm ready to go home, and

0:58:11.720 --> 0:58:13.480
<v Speaker 1>every time I'm in Denver, I'm like so bummed and

0:58:13.560 --> 0:58:14.800
<v Speaker 1>want to stay. So I was like, you know what,

0:58:14.840 --> 0:58:18.120
<v Speaker 1>I'm still do it six I give six month lease

0:58:18.200 --> 0:58:21.480
<v Speaker 1>commitment and like, I'm gonna try it. Why not? And

0:58:21.520 --> 0:58:23.480
<v Speaker 1>your work allows you to do that, So I think

0:58:23.480 --> 0:58:25.680
<v Speaker 1>I'll actually work more. There's more nightclubs and stuff there

0:58:25.680 --> 0:58:27.800
<v Speaker 1>to dj and um, I just think it's a better

0:58:27.880 --> 0:58:30.800
<v Speaker 1>scene for me right now. No, I've never been to Denver.

0:58:30.840 --> 0:58:33.919
<v Speaker 1>Where is Denver on the map like in the middle. Sorry, guys,

0:58:33.920 --> 0:58:43.280
<v Speaker 1>I'm Canadian middle, So it's in midwest? Is that what it's? Okay? Alright,

0:58:43.360 --> 0:58:45.960
<v Speaker 1>let's talk about let's talk about relationships. I'm better at that.

0:58:46.000 --> 0:58:48.800
<v Speaker 1>Would you ever move? Yeah, I'm so open to that,

0:58:49.440 --> 0:58:51.720
<v Speaker 1>and so I'm open to moving. I'm open to long

0:58:51.760 --> 0:58:54.680
<v Speaker 1>distance relationships. I'm open to a lot of things. I'm

0:58:54.680 --> 0:59:03.160
<v Speaker 1>gonna be open to threesome soon, not someone from her

0:59:07.800 --> 0:59:11.480
<v Speaker 1>very loyal yeah, so romantic funny. Um, So, Brandy, do

0:59:11.480 --> 0:59:15.880
<v Speaker 1>you have any fun like dating stories you want to share? Oh? Man,

0:59:15.960 --> 0:59:17.720
<v Speaker 1>it's been so long since I've been on an actual

0:59:17.840 --> 0:59:21.040
<v Speaker 1>date that I can't even really Like my last real

0:59:21.160 --> 0:59:23.320
<v Speaker 1>date honestly was this Riot date and it was awful,

0:59:23.720 --> 0:59:27.720
<v Speaker 1>Like what was Yeah, how much did you talk before

0:59:27.720 --> 0:59:29.200
<v Speaker 1>you went on the date? Like not at all? Like

0:59:29.240 --> 0:59:30.960
<v Speaker 1>it was like we matched and like I was just

0:59:31.000 --> 0:59:32.880
<v Speaker 1>so impressed that he actually was like, hey, let's get

0:59:32.880 --> 0:59:34.479
<v Speaker 1>coffee because most of the time you match the people

0:59:34.520 --> 0:59:36.160
<v Speaker 1>on there and then it's just like sien and no

0:59:36.160 --> 0:59:37.560
<v Speaker 1>one ever speaks. So I'm like, all right, well, at

0:59:37.600 --> 0:59:38.960
<v Speaker 1>least this guy in the balls to ask me on

0:59:39.080 --> 0:59:41.200
<v Speaker 1>on an actual date. So and it was in l A.

0:59:41.480 --> 0:59:42.840
<v Speaker 1>So it was a red flag number one does he

0:59:42.880 --> 0:59:45.120
<v Speaker 1>lives in l A? And red flag number two was

0:59:45.120 --> 0:59:47.720
<v Speaker 1>that he looked like either like an Instagram model, Yeah

0:59:48.200 --> 0:59:50.640
<v Speaker 1>like that. No listen, I like, I like dad bods,

0:59:50.760 --> 0:59:52.560
<v Speaker 1>like if you have no if you have a six

0:59:52.600 --> 0:59:54.080
<v Speaker 1>pack or even a two pack, I don't want to

0:59:54.120 --> 0:59:59.280
<v Speaker 1>see any packs on you. Yeah. Nothing. Anyway, he was like,

0:59:59.280 --> 1:00:01.360
<v Speaker 1>way to looking. I was because it's a bad idea.

1:00:01.400 --> 1:00:03.400
<v Speaker 1>But so I went to coffee with him. Literally I

1:00:03.440 --> 1:00:05.240
<v Speaker 1>don't think I got a word in for an entire hour.

1:00:05.600 --> 1:00:07.120
<v Speaker 1>Like all he did was talking about himself. He was

1:00:07.160 --> 1:00:10.040
<v Speaker 1>from Germany apparently, I don't know, and like he just

1:00:10.080 --> 1:00:12.600
<v Speaker 1>talked and talked and talked, didn't ask me anything, Like

1:00:12.640 --> 1:00:16.840
<v Speaker 1>I never asked me one question. And so then after

1:00:16.880 --> 1:00:18.800
<v Speaker 1>an hour of that, I was like I really gotta go,

1:00:18.920 --> 1:00:21.320
<v Speaker 1>like I gotta be somewhere. I hated it. And then

1:00:21.600 --> 1:00:24.920
<v Speaker 1>the next day I was with my manager actually and

1:00:25.040 --> 1:00:26.600
<v Speaker 1>was telling her about it, and she was like, wait

1:00:26.600 --> 1:00:28.720
<v Speaker 1>a second, what's the guy's name. It's like I looked

1:00:28.760 --> 1:00:30.600
<v Speaker 1>back and looked at up. She was like a girl

1:00:30.600 --> 1:00:32.439
<v Speaker 1>in her office just went on a date with this guy.

1:00:32.600 --> 1:00:34.240
<v Speaker 1>And it blew my mind because one of the things

1:00:34.240 --> 1:00:36.880
<v Speaker 1>he told me, like and he volunteered this information. He

1:00:36.880 --> 1:00:38.080
<v Speaker 1>was like, you, I've never been the kind of guy

1:00:38.080 --> 1:00:39.840
<v Speaker 1>that can like date multile people at once. Like I

1:00:39.920 --> 1:00:42.200
<v Speaker 1>just don't understand that concept. He said that. Yeah, he

1:00:42.240 --> 1:00:43.560
<v Speaker 1>was like, this is like an l a thing or

1:00:43.600 --> 1:00:46.000
<v Speaker 1>people date most people at once. Yeah, And then I

1:00:46.040 --> 1:00:47.720
<v Speaker 1>find out that he was dating a girl in the

1:00:47.760 --> 1:00:49.680
<v Speaker 1>office of my my manager's office, like at the same

1:00:49.720 --> 1:00:53.440
<v Speaker 1>time were we so we on our last episode we

1:00:53.440 --> 1:00:57.600
<v Speaker 1>were talking to um Susan Shaw Betty who like does

1:00:57.720 --> 1:00:59.720
<v Speaker 1>investigation and stuff on guys that you dated. What she

1:00:59.720 --> 1:01:01.360
<v Speaker 1>actually emailed me, She's like, I'm like, I don't know

1:01:01.400 --> 1:01:04.600
<v Speaker 1>if I want to know anything, UM, but you don't

1:01:04.600 --> 1:01:06.160
<v Speaker 1>have I feel like you don't have to go looking

1:01:06.200 --> 1:01:08.760
<v Speaker 1>for information. It just ends up showing. You know, the

1:01:08.800 --> 1:01:10.160
<v Speaker 1>more you look for something, the more you're going to

1:01:10.200 --> 1:01:13.120
<v Speaker 1>find something that you don't like. And I feel like

1:01:13.160 --> 1:01:15.240
<v Speaker 1>the universe will always work in your favor if you're

1:01:15.240 --> 1:01:16.920
<v Speaker 1>in it for the right reasons. It sounds like I'm

1:01:16.960 --> 1:01:19.600
<v Speaker 1>on the Bachelor episode, but it's true, like you'll you'll

1:01:19.680 --> 1:01:22.280
<v Speaker 1>end up finding out what you need to find out. UM,

1:01:22.440 --> 1:01:27.600
<v Speaker 1>have you guys found celebs on RYA because no way,

1:01:30.680 --> 1:01:34.280
<v Speaker 1>that's fun. Anybody that we can name I. When I

1:01:34.320 --> 1:01:36.240
<v Speaker 1>was on it, I matched with a lot of athletes,

1:01:37.440 --> 1:01:39.800
<v Speaker 1>which I know but like. And then I found out

1:01:39.880 --> 1:01:42.240
<v Speaker 1>later a buddy of mine that plays for the Grizzlies.

1:01:42.360 --> 1:01:43.520
<v Speaker 1>I was like talking to him about it and I

1:01:43.520 --> 1:01:45.040
<v Speaker 1>was like, why are all these athletes on this app?

1:01:45.120 --> 1:01:47.040
<v Speaker 1>And he was like, oh, because a good friend of ours,

1:01:47.200 --> 1:01:50.960
<v Speaker 1>like everyone knows, started the app. Yeah, yeah, I know

1:01:51.000 --> 1:01:53.600
<v Speaker 1>the person that started. Yeah, there you go. And I

1:01:53.640 --> 1:01:55.880
<v Speaker 1>messaged him like, hey, I think I'm ready for Ryeah.

1:01:56.200 --> 1:01:59.080
<v Speaker 1>He's like, all right, send a new application. Um. Actually,

1:01:59.320 --> 1:02:02.600
<v Speaker 1>speaking of a Dancing with the Stars, there was this

1:02:02.760 --> 1:02:07.560
<v Speaker 1>UM football player that it was Trio night Trio Yeah, yeah,

1:02:07.720 --> 1:02:11.080
<v Speaker 1>what's his name? Rashad Jennings was there. Dude, he's oh

1:02:11.120 --> 1:02:16.120
<v Speaker 1>my god, he's beautiful and he was there with he

1:02:16.200 --> 1:02:18.760
<v Speaker 1>wasn't it was the other guy that was the Dancing

1:02:18.760 --> 1:02:21.320
<v Speaker 1>with the Star guy this of this season with him.

1:02:21.440 --> 1:02:23.440
<v Speaker 1>Rashad was the guy that did the trio. Let me

1:02:23.440 --> 1:02:28.960
<v Speaker 1>tell you that dance. We were all like, I have

1:02:29.040 --> 1:02:31.800
<v Speaker 1>no idea. Shaw did really well and his he was

1:02:31.840 --> 1:02:35.800
<v Speaker 1>on NICK season. Oh yeah. I was like every time

1:02:35.800 --> 1:02:38.800
<v Speaker 1>when I was like, yeah, he's super high. I think

1:02:38.840 --> 1:02:42.280
<v Speaker 1>he is single. He would a beautiful human being and

1:02:42.360 --> 1:02:48.240
<v Speaker 1>so sweet professional athlete. I was gonna say, I'm just

1:02:48.280 --> 1:02:51.320
<v Speaker 1>saying he's just like physically like, he's gorgeous. With the

1:02:51.400 --> 1:02:54.880
<v Speaker 1>professional athlete, I highly recommend the rock star. No, I

1:02:55.440 --> 1:02:57.120
<v Speaker 1>never No, I'm not going to date it for I'm

1:02:57.160 --> 1:02:59.560
<v Speaker 1>just saying he was very it was good looking. I

1:02:59.560 --> 1:03:03.920
<v Speaker 1>feel like a retired professional athlete though, was doable. No,

1:03:04.080 --> 1:03:06.520
<v Speaker 1>everyone's like, I feel like, I don't know if they're

1:03:06.520 --> 1:03:08.360
<v Speaker 1>not actually playing anymore and they're kind of a has

1:03:08.360 --> 1:03:10.000
<v Speaker 1>been maybe they're like a little more down to earth.

1:03:13.720 --> 1:03:18.600
<v Speaker 1>So everybody just chill, Wait, are you single? I'm single? Yeah,

1:03:18.600 --> 1:03:22.960
<v Speaker 1>she does run on a riot date each other because

1:03:23.000 --> 1:03:25.080
<v Speaker 1>I think that's the way to do it. Well, obviously,

1:03:25.880 --> 1:03:28.560
<v Speaker 1>I have a really good person to set you up with.

1:03:28.680 --> 1:03:33.880
<v Speaker 1>I've actually been thinking about it. So wait with me

1:03:33.960 --> 1:03:36.680
<v Speaker 1>at least one if does he have a brother for Brandy?

1:03:36.800 --> 1:03:40.640
<v Speaker 1>Yeah right, I actually don't know if he has a brother. Okay,

1:03:40.680 --> 1:03:46.400
<v Speaker 1>I'll take him, but find out so you can make

1:03:46.400 --> 1:03:48.320
<v Speaker 1>it a double date. How old is this guy? This

1:03:48.320 --> 1:03:51.600
<v Speaker 1>as long as my first question, he is, okay, because

1:03:51.600 --> 1:03:54.720
<v Speaker 1>I think I agree with what maybe you're saying in

1:03:54.720 --> 1:03:57.360
<v Speaker 1>between the lines, which is that guys aren't really ready

1:03:57.440 --> 1:04:01.120
<v Speaker 1>until later. Well, also, i'm old, so and everybody like

1:04:01.120 --> 1:04:02.439
<v Speaker 1>it always has to set me up with these guys.

1:04:02.440 --> 1:04:05.720
<v Speaker 1>And you're not old, you're my age. You're not old,

1:04:06.200 --> 1:04:07.920
<v Speaker 1>very old. I feel I say that too. I say

1:04:07.920 --> 1:04:09.880
<v Speaker 1>I'm old too. But when someone else says in their

1:04:09.880 --> 1:04:12.000
<v Speaker 1>my age, I'm like than both of you, I'm sure, No,

1:04:12.120 --> 1:04:14.919
<v Speaker 1>you're not. I don't look how old are you? And

1:04:15.080 --> 1:04:22.439
<v Speaker 1>thirty two? Oh? Okay, yeah, no, I'm thirty one. What

1:04:22.480 --> 1:04:26.440
<v Speaker 1>was I going to say about this guy? Oh about age?

1:04:26.640 --> 1:04:29.920
<v Speaker 1>He's forty two, which my mind is like a really

1:04:29.960 --> 1:04:33.480
<v Speaker 1>good age, who's forty two? They got your dating that

1:04:33.560 --> 1:04:40.800
<v Speaker 1>you want to send me? What do we think about this? Okay?

1:04:40.880 --> 1:04:45.600
<v Speaker 1>My open, yes, totally, totally. My thing is, yeah, My

1:04:45.720 --> 1:04:50.160
<v Speaker 1>thing is I've dated guys usually that are old, yeah,

1:04:50.200 --> 1:04:53.320
<v Speaker 1>between like thirty five and thirty nine or even forty,

1:04:53.640 --> 1:04:57.040
<v Speaker 1>And I'm like, if you're still single past that age,

1:04:58.080 --> 1:05:02.640
<v Speaker 1>there's something up. I don't know. That's not no, I'm

1:05:02.640 --> 1:05:05.600
<v Speaker 1>saying there's something up in terms of like commitment maybe.

1:05:05.680 --> 1:05:08.760
<v Speaker 1>But here's here's my reason for for when you get

1:05:08.800 --> 1:05:11.200
<v Speaker 1>older is when you're that age, you're so set in

1:05:11.200 --> 1:05:13.920
<v Speaker 1>your ways and you're so comfortable with being single that

1:05:13.960 --> 1:05:16.400
<v Speaker 1>I think it's it's got to be very hard to

1:05:16.520 --> 1:05:19.880
<v Speaker 1>change your lifestyle to accommodate somebody else, isn't. That's just

1:05:19.880 --> 1:05:21.720
<v Speaker 1>how Because the older I get, the more I feel

1:05:21.720 --> 1:05:24.200
<v Speaker 1>myself slipping into that direct where it's like, I don't know,

1:05:24.240 --> 1:05:26.640
<v Speaker 1>I'm so set in my ways the way it is,

1:05:26.680 --> 1:05:28.200
<v Speaker 1>and I like the way it is. I like my

1:05:28.240 --> 1:05:31.000
<v Speaker 1>time alone exactly all these things, and I'm like, the

1:05:31.040 --> 1:05:34.120
<v Speaker 1>longer I'm single and older I get, the harder I

1:05:34.160 --> 1:05:37.240
<v Speaker 1>can see that it is to like let somebody else in. Right,

1:05:37.480 --> 1:05:39.880
<v Speaker 1>Here's a question we've discussed on the radio show before.

1:05:39.920 --> 1:05:43.360
<v Speaker 1>If you meet a guy and he's forty, which is

1:05:43.400 --> 1:05:49.880
<v Speaker 1>more desirable divorced or never married? Yeah, I mean, I

1:05:49.920 --> 1:05:53.160
<v Speaker 1>think it totally depends on the person, because there are

1:05:53.200 --> 1:05:56.400
<v Speaker 1>some forty year old who have just been so focused

1:05:56.400 --> 1:05:59.960
<v Speaker 1>on something else, like they prioritized something else in their life.

1:06:00.400 --> 1:06:02.520
<v Speaker 1>And I think, Um, I was just talking to a

1:06:02.560 --> 1:06:07.000
<v Speaker 1>guy friend who got married later in life, and he's

1:06:07.040 --> 1:06:09.320
<v Speaker 1>such a romantic, but he was just focused on other

1:06:09.440 --> 1:06:11.760
<v Speaker 1>things when he was in his thirties and He described

1:06:11.760 --> 1:06:14.480
<v Speaker 1>it as like men are like avocados. They're like not ripe,

1:06:14.520 --> 1:06:17.400
<v Speaker 1>not righte, not ripe, not right then they're like really ripe,

1:06:17.400 --> 1:06:20.120
<v Speaker 1>and they're ready and they're just like right there with you.

1:06:20.320 --> 1:06:23.320
<v Speaker 1>And I think some men are like that. Um So

1:06:23.320 --> 1:06:25.000
<v Speaker 1>I don't think it's a bad thing if they're single

1:06:25.040 --> 1:06:29.000
<v Speaker 1>in their forty at all. I'm open to it. Divorce

1:06:29.080 --> 1:06:32.800
<v Speaker 1>isn't bad though. Divorces they learn a lot, They learned

1:06:32.800 --> 1:06:36.520
<v Speaker 1>a lot of lessons and committed. Yeah. For me, like,

1:06:36.840 --> 1:06:38.680
<v Speaker 1>I'm not saying I don't want kids, but I I

1:06:39.000 --> 1:06:42.000
<v Speaker 1>go either way. So to me, the idea of somebody

1:06:42.040 --> 1:06:44.160
<v Speaker 1>that maybe has kids, like I'm the cool step mom

1:06:44.240 --> 1:06:46.840
<v Speaker 1>is really appealing. That's a good that's a good thing.

1:06:47.000 --> 1:06:51.480
<v Speaker 1>So if I didn't want kids, I don't think I

1:06:51.480 --> 1:06:53.120
<v Speaker 1>would want I don't think i'd be like, oh my god,

1:06:53.160 --> 1:06:55.360
<v Speaker 1>I want a relationship. I want love. You know, I'd

1:06:55.360 --> 1:06:57.080
<v Speaker 1>be like, I'm good, I'm like going to focus on

1:06:57.120 --> 1:07:02.000
<v Speaker 1>other things. Well that's interesting. I don't really yeah, really, yeah,

1:07:02.320 --> 1:07:03.760
<v Speaker 1>I don't think. I don't think I would put as

1:07:03.880 --> 1:07:06.880
<v Speaker 1>I don't think i'd put as much pressure just do that. Yeah,

1:07:06.920 --> 1:07:09.480
<v Speaker 1>because that's I really could go either way. With kids,

1:07:09.520 --> 1:07:11.320
<v Speaker 1>Like I just been a point where I'm just not sure,

1:07:11.560 --> 1:07:13.320
<v Speaker 1>Like I'm not confident enough to say, like I don't

1:07:13.360 --> 1:07:15.680
<v Speaker 1>want them, but I definitely it's not. And you come

1:07:15.720 --> 1:07:18.120
<v Speaker 1>from a big family, I know, maybe that ruined me.

1:07:19.320 --> 1:07:23.000
<v Speaker 1>That's four younger siblings ruined me. Um. But that's why

1:07:23.080 --> 1:07:24.960
<v Speaker 1>I don't feel like a time like a time pressure

1:07:25.040 --> 1:07:28.640
<v Speaker 1>on it. But like, actually, my last real actual boyfriend,

1:07:28.640 --> 1:07:30.480
<v Speaker 1>like long term relationship, he had a kid. He had

1:07:30.480 --> 1:07:33.120
<v Speaker 1>an eight year old and I loved that, loved it.

1:07:33.160 --> 1:07:34.600
<v Speaker 1>We didn't have him all the time, he had him

1:07:34.640 --> 1:07:36.560
<v Speaker 1>half the time, and like I was the step you know,

1:07:36.560 --> 1:07:38.520
<v Speaker 1>the cool like step parents listened to sense and like

1:07:38.920 --> 1:07:42.480
<v Speaker 1>the bottom gifts loved me, you know, and like I

1:07:42.520 --> 1:07:44.800
<v Speaker 1>really enjoyed that role. Is that sad though, that you're

1:07:44.840 --> 1:07:46.920
<v Speaker 1>not part of that kid's life anymore? A little bit?

1:07:47.680 --> 1:07:51.080
<v Speaker 1>The breakup was the hardest because of that. Right, do

1:07:51.120 --> 1:07:52.680
<v Speaker 1>you feel like you have a time crunch because you're

1:07:52.720 --> 1:07:55.040
<v Speaker 1>only there? No, I don't feel like there's a time

1:07:55.120 --> 1:07:57.400
<v Speaker 1>crunch because guys, I thought by this age I would

1:07:57.400 --> 1:08:01.320
<v Speaker 1>have been already married with kids. Thing that. Yeah, I

1:08:01.320 --> 1:08:03.920
<v Speaker 1>feel like we were brainwashed as children. That's what I'm saying,

1:08:03.960 --> 1:08:05.800
<v Speaker 1>I mean at least in the South for me, girl,

1:08:05.840 --> 1:08:09.280
<v Speaker 1>I'm Italian. Yeah, like, yeah, you're just like everyone's my friends,

1:08:09.320 --> 1:08:11.840
<v Speaker 1>Like are are one of my friends who was married?

1:08:11.880 --> 1:08:13.760
<v Speaker 1>She's like, you know, Vanessa, like it's time, it's time.

1:08:13.800 --> 1:08:15.680
<v Speaker 1>I'm like stop, like you just had your baby. You're

1:08:15.760 --> 1:08:19.000
<v Speaker 1>not even your thirties yet. Like, I'm so happy being

1:08:19.000 --> 1:08:21.040
<v Speaker 1>in the position I am right now. Like, I don't

1:08:21.160 --> 1:08:23.720
<v Speaker 1>envy anyone's life. I'm not going to start comparing my

1:08:23.760 --> 1:08:26.680
<v Speaker 1>life to someone else's life. I'm really happy where I

1:08:26.680 --> 1:08:29.440
<v Speaker 1>am career wise, where I am, you know, like everything

1:08:29.920 --> 1:08:33.360
<v Speaker 1>I think it's just you meet someone and it's like no, no, no,

1:08:33.360 --> 1:08:36.000
<v Speaker 1>no no, it's like, oh, come on, just one and

1:08:36.120 --> 1:08:38.320
<v Speaker 1>prove me wrong, you know. But no, I don't. I

1:08:38.320 --> 1:08:40.000
<v Speaker 1>don't feel it's the time crunch. I definitely want to

1:08:40.040 --> 1:08:44.800
<v Speaker 1>have kids. I want to have kids before and yeah yeah,

1:08:44.960 --> 1:08:47.280
<v Speaker 1>and also what you just said about only wanting a

1:08:47.280 --> 1:08:49.320
<v Speaker 1>guy for the purpose of having babies. You've also said

1:08:49.320 --> 1:08:52.840
<v Speaker 1>that you're so romantic. You believe in love and all

1:08:52.880 --> 1:08:55.439
<v Speaker 1>these things, right, I believe in I believe in the

1:08:55.160 --> 1:08:58.280
<v Speaker 1>fai the unity of family, the family units that make sense.

1:08:58.400 --> 1:09:02.720
<v Speaker 1>Yeah yeah, um, And because I come from. I come

1:09:02.760 --> 1:09:05.839
<v Speaker 1>from like my family's everything. You know, we spend every

1:09:05.880 --> 1:09:09.439
<v Speaker 1>Sunday together. Um. Having moved out to l A for

1:09:09.479 --> 1:09:12.599
<v Speaker 1>that year, I was back home in Montreal once a month. Like,

1:09:12.640 --> 1:09:14.439
<v Speaker 1>I'm super close to my family and you're a super

1:09:14.439 --> 1:09:17.599
<v Speaker 1>branded you're super close to your family too. Um, so

1:09:18.040 --> 1:09:22.559
<v Speaker 1>I'm I. Yeah, I think I want to have a

1:09:22.600 --> 1:09:25.800
<v Speaker 1>relationship because I want to be able to have those

1:09:25.840 --> 1:09:28.759
<v Speaker 1>babies and I want my babies to have the father

1:09:29.160 --> 1:09:33.559
<v Speaker 1>that I had. Yeah. You know, do you find that

1:09:33.600 --> 1:09:37.320
<v Speaker 1>it's hard to find somebody that fits into your family? Yeah?

1:09:37.400 --> 1:09:40.400
<v Speaker 1>Because I definitely have that problem. And and it's like

1:09:40.680 --> 1:09:43.400
<v Speaker 1>this is gonna sound terrible, but one of my siblings,

1:09:43.439 --> 1:09:46.200
<v Speaker 1>significan another my mom just the other day was like,

1:09:46.240 --> 1:09:48.120
<v Speaker 1>I just don't feel like they fit in. I just

1:09:48.120 --> 1:09:49.760
<v Speaker 1>don't know. I don't want this. I don't want this

1:09:49.800 --> 1:09:51.719
<v Speaker 1>to work out. I just don't feel like get fits.

1:09:52.000 --> 1:09:53.960
<v Speaker 1>And it's but it's but it's hard because we're so

1:09:54.040 --> 1:09:56.640
<v Speaker 1>tight and so close that when we do we all

1:09:56.680 --> 1:09:58.600
<v Speaker 1>get together, like if you can't keep up, then you

1:09:58.640 --> 1:10:03.680
<v Speaker 1>can't hang. Just absolutely happening, absolutely, and my family is

1:10:03.680 --> 1:10:05.800
<v Speaker 1>allowed to keep up with Sam to sum it all up,

1:10:05.840 --> 1:10:07.400
<v Speaker 1>I think the three of you all need to chill

1:10:07.960 --> 1:10:11.479
<v Speaker 1>and what we're going to how to keep our next

1:10:11.520 --> 1:10:17.479
<v Speaker 1>looking actually brought it for you, Amy. So we actually

1:10:17.520 --> 1:10:20.479
<v Speaker 1>have um a makeup artist on the phone right now.

1:10:20.520 --> 1:10:22.040
<v Speaker 1>Who's a friend of mine who did my makeup for

1:10:22.080 --> 1:10:27.040
<v Speaker 1>Justin Cody's wedding, Spencer Barnes. Yeah, thank you. He's he's

1:10:27.240 --> 1:10:29.000
<v Speaker 1>a magician when it comes to make up. Spencer, are

1:10:29.000 --> 1:10:32.160
<v Speaker 1>you on the line, Yes, thank you. Hi. How are you?

1:10:32.960 --> 1:10:35.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm great? How are you? I'm good? So I posted

1:10:35.439 --> 1:10:37.439
<v Speaker 1>that picture of us and everyone was like, I'm so

1:10:37.479 --> 1:10:41.600
<v Speaker 1>happy you found love. But that's how we swing the

1:10:41.600 --> 1:10:44.240
<v Speaker 1>opposite ways, by the way, So I was like, that

1:10:44.360 --> 1:10:46.680
<v Speaker 1>was hilarious. That's the best you've ever looked. Yeah. No.

1:10:46.880 --> 1:10:48.560
<v Speaker 1>But so I met him when I was hosting the

1:10:48.680 --> 1:10:50.400
<v Speaker 1>news and he did my makeup and I was like, damn,

1:10:50.439 --> 1:10:53.120
<v Speaker 1>I look so good. I'm going out tonight. And I

1:10:53.160 --> 1:10:54.559
<v Speaker 1>went out that night and I was like, yeah, I

1:10:54.600 --> 1:10:58.479
<v Speaker 1>need Spencer for all my events whenever I'm in l A. Yeah.

1:10:58.760 --> 1:11:01.559
<v Speaker 1>So we So was actually talking to Amy about this

1:11:01.880 --> 1:11:03.720
<v Speaker 1>the you have this new line that just came out.

1:11:03.760 --> 1:11:06.080
<v Speaker 1>He actually filmed It's crazy you're out here in l A.

1:11:06.200 --> 1:11:07.880
<v Speaker 1>You're based in l A. But he came out to

1:11:07.920 --> 1:11:11.360
<v Speaker 1>Montreal to film, Um, this new product that you just launched, um,

1:11:11.400 --> 1:11:13.599
<v Speaker 1>and it's a it's can you actually go into details

1:11:13.600 --> 1:11:17.120
<v Speaker 1>so I don't want to screw it up? You're absolutely yes.

1:11:17.160 --> 1:11:20.680
<v Speaker 1>I was in Montreal filming some collateral materials about my

1:11:20.760 --> 1:11:23.760
<v Speaker 1>new product. It's called the Facial Instant Culpting wand is

1:11:23.880 --> 1:11:26.400
<v Speaker 1>to follow up to my also pretty new product, the

1:11:26.520 --> 1:11:29.760
<v Speaker 1>next Culpting One. And they're best designed to instantly lift

1:11:29.880 --> 1:11:34.320
<v Speaker 1>firm and tightened as a super hydrate and deliver incredible

1:11:34.400 --> 1:11:37.880
<v Speaker 1>nutrients that helped rebuild and regenerate collagen, which is the

1:11:37.960 --> 1:11:40.840
<v Speaker 1>look of youth that we all are so now much

1:11:40.880 --> 1:11:44.519
<v Speaker 1>after keeping and maintaining. That's amazing. I mean, it's it's

1:11:44.560 --> 1:11:46.599
<v Speaker 1>such an interesting product because usually we think of our

1:11:46.680 --> 1:11:49.000
<v Speaker 1>face and we kind of neglect our neck and our

1:11:49.040 --> 1:11:50.920
<v Speaker 1>neck as an extension of our face. And I always

1:11:50.960 --> 1:11:54.519
<v Speaker 1>talk about like washing our face at night, um, you know,

1:11:54.560 --> 1:11:56.479
<v Speaker 1>and people ask me about my beauty routine and stuff,

1:11:56.479 --> 1:11:58.639
<v Speaker 1>and you actually use this on my face for the wedding,

1:11:58.720 --> 1:12:00.320
<v Speaker 1>and I did feel like a little bit of you

1:12:00.400 --> 1:12:02.000
<v Speaker 1>use it around my eyes. We didn't do the neck one.

1:12:02.000 --> 1:12:04.599
<v Speaker 1>I haven't tried that one yet, um, but I've seen

1:12:04.640 --> 1:12:06.960
<v Speaker 1>the before and afters on your Instagram page and it's

1:12:06.960 --> 1:12:10.519
<v Speaker 1>incredible just the results that you get from this he has.

1:12:10.960 --> 1:12:13.800
<v Speaker 1>People are loving the way that it works and um

1:12:14.000 --> 1:12:17.799
<v Speaker 1>many noticed instant results, but also as they used the product,

1:12:17.880 --> 1:12:21.000
<v Speaker 1>over time they develop and build more and more results.

1:12:21.000 --> 1:12:24.720
<v Speaker 1>So it's designed to give both immediate and long term results.

1:12:25.920 --> 1:12:27.880
<v Speaker 1>So on a scale from one to ten, how's my

1:12:27.920 --> 1:12:31.360
<v Speaker 1>neck looking? That the issue? Is? That? Why I'm single?

1:12:31.400 --> 1:12:35.400
<v Speaker 1>S hardly? You know, the neck is an area that

1:12:35.439 --> 1:12:37.720
<v Speaker 1>I wanted to bring attention to your right. We have

1:12:37.920 --> 1:12:41.680
<v Speaker 1>so many cool products and you know, little micro procedures

1:12:41.680 --> 1:12:44.439
<v Speaker 1>for the faith, but the neck area has been too

1:12:44.439 --> 1:12:47.400
<v Speaker 1>long neglected. It's part of the body we moved the

1:12:47.400 --> 1:12:49.960
<v Speaker 1>most and it houses our voice and our throat chakra.

1:12:50.120 --> 1:12:52.040
<v Speaker 1>So I thought if there was a way we could

1:12:52.080 --> 1:12:56.000
<v Speaker 1>really target this area. It's got spin and battle skin

1:12:56.080 --> 1:12:58.960
<v Speaker 1>that more you know, prone to showing the signs of aging,

1:12:59.040 --> 1:13:02.360
<v Speaker 1>and also fun on it. So this product was something

1:13:02.400 --> 1:13:04.400
<v Speaker 1>that was a labor of love. I worked on a

1:13:04.479 --> 1:13:07.640
<v Speaker 1>couple of years to help women and even men everywhere

1:13:08.080 --> 1:13:11.280
<v Speaker 1>work on this incredible area that we move all day.

1:13:11.320 --> 1:13:16.880
<v Speaker 1>Every day. I see all those cet as I saw

1:13:17.000 --> 1:13:18.400
<v Speaker 1>Amy was as you were. I don't know if you

1:13:18.479 --> 1:13:20.400
<v Speaker 1>notice you were rubbing your neck like five seconds. I've

1:13:20.439 --> 1:13:22.600
<v Speaker 1>seen Angie Harmon with that thing on her neck and

1:13:22.680 --> 1:13:24.680
<v Speaker 1>Julianne huh yeah, thing on her neck, and I'm like,

1:13:25.680 --> 1:13:29.240
<v Speaker 1>the deal, Why is this all on my Facebook? And

1:13:29.520 --> 1:13:32.360
<v Speaker 1>why you message me like a midnight last night? Why

1:13:32.479 --> 1:13:35.360
<v Speaker 1>is everybody rubbing this thing on their neck? And is it?

1:13:35.400 --> 1:13:37.800
<v Speaker 1>Is there any like side effects or anything? No, it's

1:13:37.800 --> 1:13:41.400
<v Speaker 1>like parabin free. It's like there's all like these. It's

1:13:41.439 --> 1:13:45.639
<v Speaker 1>all organic. Is it organic? Yes, it's it's mostly organic.

1:13:45.720 --> 1:13:50.080
<v Speaker 1>It's parabin free, it's gluten free, it is uh free

1:13:50.080 --> 1:13:53.439
<v Speaker 1>of any harsh chemicals or preservatives, and it also is

1:13:53.840 --> 1:13:57.120
<v Speaker 1>cruelty free. We don't have any animal testing. And it's

1:13:57.160 --> 1:14:01.360
<v Speaker 1>also fragrance free for people who have allergies with fragrances

1:14:01.360 --> 1:14:03.280
<v Speaker 1>and things like that. So he's made it as as

1:14:03.320 --> 1:14:07.120
<v Speaker 1>consciously and friendly as possible. And you're right, there's people

1:14:07.120 --> 1:14:10.320
<v Speaker 1>are using it, you know, even in their thirties, because

1:14:11.080 --> 1:14:14.160
<v Speaker 1>we know that Presenter is so much easier than you know,

1:14:14.360 --> 1:14:17.439
<v Speaker 1>doing serious corrections. So there's really no time that's too

1:14:17.439 --> 1:14:21.439
<v Speaker 1>soon to start taking excellent care of your skin. Absolutely well. Spencer,

1:14:21.479 --> 1:14:24.720
<v Speaker 1>where can when people find us? It's really easy to

1:14:24.760 --> 1:14:26.840
<v Speaker 1>get and we shipped anywhere in the world, but also

1:14:26.920 --> 1:14:29.960
<v Speaker 1>free shipping in the US. It's right on my website

1:14:30.000 --> 1:14:34.599
<v Speaker 1>Spencer Barnes l a dot com or senter Barnes dot com. Amazing, Spencer,

1:14:34.640 --> 1:14:36.400
<v Speaker 1>thank you so much for calling in. Thank you for

1:14:36.439 --> 1:14:39.760
<v Speaker 1>making me look bomb on Sunday at the wedding. Um,

1:14:39.840 --> 1:14:41.720
<v Speaker 1>there's so much fun. I'm glad you had a great

1:14:41.760 --> 1:14:44.640
<v Speaker 1>time at the wedding. It looked like everyone had a

1:14:44.720 --> 1:14:47.640
<v Speaker 1>marvelous time celebrating that special union. It was. It was

1:14:47.680 --> 1:14:50.759
<v Speaker 1>a beautiful wedding. Thanks again for calling in. You're welcome.

1:14:51.080 --> 1:14:57.000
<v Speaker 1>I love you. He's on and he's so like in person,

1:14:57.000 --> 1:14:58.760
<v Speaker 1>he's so striking. I remember when I first met him.

1:14:58.800 --> 1:15:01.679
<v Speaker 1>I was like, is this guy? And then they're like, Vanessa,

1:15:01.720 --> 1:15:05.360
<v Speaker 1>he's gay, and I was like, oh, and he's such

1:15:05.479 --> 1:15:09.519
<v Speaker 1>a sweetheart. Like his energy, yeah, I know, his his

1:15:09.640 --> 1:15:13.559
<v Speaker 1>energy is just infectious. So this has been I feel

1:15:13.600 --> 1:15:16.880
<v Speaker 1>like it's been a let's shut on Vanessa today. But

1:15:17.200 --> 1:15:21.799
<v Speaker 1>I hope, I hope everyone tuning in. And I posted

1:15:21.840 --> 1:15:23.960
<v Speaker 1>this on my Instagram. If you're single. I hope you're

1:15:23.960 --> 1:15:27.280
<v Speaker 1>listening to this, UM. I hope you learned something from

1:15:27.280 --> 1:15:31.040
<v Speaker 1>my mistakes and from what I'm going through. Heartbreak is

1:15:31.080 --> 1:15:33.360
<v Speaker 1>a real thing, even if you're dating someone for a

1:15:33.479 --> 1:15:37.679
<v Speaker 1>split second. I mean, there's three of us here, three beautiful.

1:15:37.800 --> 1:15:40.519
<v Speaker 1>I can call myself beautiful. Is that weird? But three three,

1:15:40.960 --> 1:15:43.479
<v Speaker 1>you know, like amazing women, and we're all single and

1:15:43.520 --> 1:15:46.000
<v Speaker 1>we're all going through the same stuff. So I wanted

1:15:46.040 --> 1:15:49.240
<v Speaker 1>to say a big thank you to l Where from

1:15:49.280 --> 1:15:50.680
<v Speaker 1>the men DApp. This is the third time you're on

1:15:50.720 --> 1:15:52.280
<v Speaker 1>the show. I love having you and I'm so happy

1:15:52.320 --> 1:15:58.320
<v Speaker 1>that I met you in person today pronouncing my name correctly. Where? Yeah,

1:15:58.600 --> 1:16:03.800
<v Speaker 1>how did you say I worked out? Yeah, something like that. Yeah. Uh.

1:16:03.840 --> 1:16:06.160
<v Speaker 1>And for my friend Brandy Size for coming in. Dr

1:16:06.280 --> 1:16:08.640
<v Speaker 1>Jennifer Freed for seeing then the next six months, you know,

1:16:08.680 --> 1:16:10.559
<v Speaker 1>some magical stuff is going to start happening for me

1:16:10.880 --> 1:16:13.439
<v Speaker 1>and for my dear friend Spencer Barnes Um. You can

1:16:13.520 --> 1:16:16.679
<v Speaker 1>check out his neck wand on his Instagram account. Brandy

1:16:16.720 --> 1:16:20.960
<v Speaker 1>has a podcast UM recording later today with wells okay

1:16:21.680 --> 1:16:25.280
<v Speaker 1>and what's your podcast? Call Work Thing Podcast. You can

1:16:25.320 --> 1:16:29.439
<v Speaker 1>find it on iTunes and all the things. Um, yeah,

1:16:29.520 --> 1:16:31.559
<v Speaker 1>Wells is awesome. I was actually gonna say earlier. Wells

1:16:31.600 --> 1:16:33.960
<v Speaker 1>is a great example of like, if he had never

1:16:33.960 --> 1:16:36.120
<v Speaker 1>gone on The Bachelor, you would have never met Sarah.

1:16:36.280 --> 1:16:38.400
<v Speaker 1>And they're so cute together, so they just together. I

1:16:38.400 --> 1:16:42.160
<v Speaker 1>think they celebrate their first when you're so cute. Yeah,

1:16:42.240 --> 1:16:45.040
<v Speaker 1>and where can we find you on Instagram? At Brandy Cyrus.

1:16:45.080 --> 1:16:47.880
<v Speaker 1>It's Brandy with an eye. Follow me if you like

1:16:47.960 --> 1:16:51.519
<v Speaker 1>horses and bachelor people and if you're in Denver, And

1:16:51.560 --> 1:16:55.840
<v Speaker 1>if you're in Denver and you're a single, dude, you're

1:16:55.880 --> 1:17:00.360
<v Speaker 1>the hottie in my apartment building. And you can see

1:17:00.479 --> 1:17:02.759
<v Speaker 1>download the Men DApp if you're going through a breakup.

1:17:02.920 --> 1:17:05.439
<v Speaker 1>Um l, you're an expert at this. Thank you so

1:17:05.520 --> 1:17:07.760
<v Speaker 1>much for joining in, Thank you for having me, and

1:17:08.160 --> 1:17:10.880
<v Speaker 1>please join in next week and hopefully I will suck

1:17:10.920 --> 1:17:13.439
<v Speaker 1>a little bit less at dating hell by Suck at

1:17:13.520 --> 1:17:16.439
<v Speaker 1>Dating with Dean, Vanessa and Jared on I Heart Radio

1:17:16.600 --> 1:17:19.120
<v Speaker 1>or wherever you listen to podcast