WEBVTT - You Ain't Married - 10.5.26

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<v Speaker 1>Right now, it is time for The Nephew and today's

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<v Speaker 1>prank phone call.

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<v Speaker 2>Run That Prank is brought to you by Morgan &amp; Morgan,

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<v Speaker 2>America's largest injury law firm.

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<v Speaker 1>If you've been injured, don't take on the insurance company alone.

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<v Speaker 2>Contact Morgan &amp; Morgan at ForThePeople.com slash Harvey Radio.

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<v Speaker 1>The fee is free unless you win. Nephew, what you

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<v Speaker 1>got for us?

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<v Speaker 2>Y'all ain't married. It's just not looking good. I just

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<v Speaker 2>want to let y'all know y'all ain't married. Let's go

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<v Speaker 2>get them.

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<v Speaker 3>Hello?

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<v Speaker 4>Hello, I'm trying to reach Brian.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, this is me.

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<v Speaker 4>How you doing, Brian? My name is Daniel. I wanted

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<v Speaker 4>to give you a call today. You got a minute? Yeah. Okay, listen,

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<v Speaker 4>you're Brian, right? You're married to Althea? Yeah. Hello?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I'm here. Yeah, that's me. That's my wife. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay. Got a question for you. How long have you

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<v Speaker 4>guys been married?

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<v Speaker 3>Going on nine years now. We've been married. Now, who

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<v Speaker 3>is this?

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<v Speaker 4>My name is Daniel. Were you guys married at Greater

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<v Speaker 4>New * * * Missionary Baptist Church?

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<v Speaker 3>Let me see. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>Yep.

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<v Speaker 2>Yep.

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<v Speaker 3>That's the name of that church.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>Great * * *. Yeah, that's right.

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<v Speaker 4>Why?

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<v Speaker 3>What's going on? What are you asking me all these

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<v Speaker 3>questions for?

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<v Speaker 4>Okay. Do you remember the minister that officiated your actual

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<v Speaker 4>wedding ceremony? Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>Reverend * * * * * *.

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<v Speaker 4>Reverend * * * * * *. Right. Yeah. Okay.

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<v Speaker 4>I got the right person. I wanted to make sure

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<v Speaker 4>I had the right person, Brian, so I'm sorry if

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<v Speaker 4>it seemed a little weird to you. Here's what's going on.

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<v Speaker 4>We've just come up with a new discovery, a lot

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<v Speaker 4>of information that Reverend * * * * * *

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<v Speaker 4>None of his credentials are true. Everything is false. He's

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<v Speaker 4>not a minister at all. He never was a minister.

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<v Speaker 4>And every single wedding ceremony that he officiated is basically

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<v Speaker 4>null and void. And I hate to be the bearer

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<v Speaker 4>of bad news, but you and Althea, even though you

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<v Speaker 4>think you've been married for nine years, you guys are

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<v Speaker 4>not married at all.

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<v Speaker 3>No, no, no, no, no. Doc, you've got to have

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<v Speaker 3>the wrong person. Because me and that thing, we got

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<v Speaker 3>married about nine years ago.

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<v Speaker 4>I know that. What I'm telling you is he never

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<v Speaker 4>was ordained. He's never been an ordained minister. He's not

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<v Speaker 4>a minister at all. So when he performed this ceremony,

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<v Speaker 4>your wedding ceremony, he had no right to be doing that.

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<v Speaker 4>You guys are not married. You know, you guys have

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<v Speaker 4>been living in sin for nine years.

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<v Speaker 3>Hold on, hold on, Doc. Let me tell you something.

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<v Speaker 3>I ain't been living in no fin. Me and my wife,

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<v Speaker 3>we have been married for nine years, and that man,

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<v Speaker 3>he's a preacher. I'm telling you, he's a preacher. I

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<v Speaker 3>heard him preach last Sunday.

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<v Speaker 4>Sir, as of today, he has no right to be

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<v Speaker 4>in anybody's pulpit. He has no right to be officiating,

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<v Speaker 4>whether it's weddings or funerals, no matter what it is,

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<v Speaker 4>christenings for children. He's not allowed to do that, and

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<v Speaker 4>we have officially stopped him from doing anything serving under

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<v Speaker 4>as being a pastor or a minister. We have stopped that.

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<v Speaker 4>But what I want you to know is that you

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<v Speaker 4>have been living in sin, and we want to try

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<v Speaker 4>and get you guys married as soon as possible so

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<v Speaker 4>you're not living in sin.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh, no, Doc. I ain't been living in no sin ever.

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<v Speaker 3>I have been married for nine years. This woman, she

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<v Speaker 3>has been taking care of me and my kids for

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<v Speaker 3>the past nine years.

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<v Speaker 4>Wait, wait, wait a minute. Wait a minute. You guys

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<v Speaker 4>have children?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, we got two kids, two beautiful kids.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay, then those kids are bastards.

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<v Speaker 3>Bastards? Hold on. Hold on. Let me tell you something.

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<v Speaker 3>My kids ain't no bastards. What about your kids? Your

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<v Speaker 3>kids aren't bastards?

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<v Speaker 4>No, sir. My kids were born in wedlock. Your kids

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<v Speaker 4>have been born out of wedlock.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm telling you. That man did my service, and he

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<v Speaker 3>is a preacher. He's a man after God's own heart himself.

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<v Speaker 3>He done done everything that he could for me and

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<v Speaker 3>my family. He is a preacher.

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<v Speaker 4>Sir, I know it's hard for you to swallow the truth,

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<v Speaker 4>but I want you to know and I need you

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<v Speaker 4>to be able to tell Althea that you guys are

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<v Speaker 4>not married, not as of right now. No, no.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, so hold on, hold on, hold on. Now, back

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<v Speaker 3>in the olden days, before all these cottages and stuff

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<v Speaker 3>came about, you telling me that them men back in

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<v Speaker 3>the old days, that they wasn't no preachers? That they

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<v Speaker 3>wasn't men after the call? Is that what you're saying

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<v Speaker 3>to me?

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<v Speaker 4>What are you getting at, sir?

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<v Speaker 3>What I'm trying to say is back in the olden days,

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<v Speaker 3>back in the 20s and 30s, they didn't have all

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<v Speaker 3>these colleges and all these degrees and stuff like these

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<v Speaker 3>new preachers got these days. That man, now, he was

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<v Speaker 3>from back then. And God called him, and that's.

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<v Speaker 4>What they went on to.

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<v Speaker 3>And all them people that they married back then, they

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<v Speaker 3>did the same thing today. You don't need no degree

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<v Speaker 3>to say that you're a preacher. You don't need no

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<v Speaker 3>license to say you're a preacher. Me and my wife,

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<v Speaker 3>we've been married for nine years. My kids have been

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<v Speaker 3>born in wedlock. We were married. We were married by

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<v Speaker 3>red and white. My friends and family, they was all there.

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<v Speaker 4>Sir, the bottom line is that you have been living

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<v Speaker 4>in sin because you have not been married with your

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<v Speaker 4>wife for the last nine years. And your kids, I

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<v Speaker 4>hate to say it, your kids are bastards.

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<v Speaker 3>Now, hold on now. I done told you. Don't say

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<v Speaker 3>nothing else about my kids. See, I ain't no cusser,

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<v Speaker 3>but don't push me. My kids ain't no bastards. You

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<v Speaker 3>understand me? You don't get me.

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<v Speaker 4>Sir, I'm trying to give you the truth and try

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<v Speaker 4>to get you in here and get you married so

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<v Speaker 4>you will not be living in sin any more than

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<v Speaker 4>what you are.

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<v Speaker 3>I ain't living in no sin. Look, now you're going

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<v Speaker 3>to make me whoop your ass. You understand? Me and

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<v Speaker 3>my wife, we have been married for nine years. Don't

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<v Speaker 3>sit up here and call me talking about the we

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<v Speaker 3>ain't married. That man ain't no preacher. You understand? Now

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<v Speaker 3>get off my phone. That's my wife. Those are my kids.

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<v Speaker 3>They have been born and wedlocked. You understand?

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<v Speaker 4>Sir, I just wanted to call and give you the

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<v Speaker 4>information so that you could probably stop living in sin.

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<v Speaker 4>That's all I wanted to do.

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<v Speaker 3>I ain't living in no sin. That's what I just

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<v Speaker 3>told you. You ain't hear me? I ain't living in

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<v Speaker 3>no sin. Maybe you're the one that's living up here

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<v Speaker 3>some sin. Now, you ain't got nothing to say to me.

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<v Speaker 3>That man had married us nine years ago. Now, get

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<v Speaker 3>your ASS off my phone.

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<v Speaker 4>Sir, I have one more thing I'd like to say

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<v Speaker 4>to you.

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<v Speaker 3>You ain't got nothing else to say to me. You

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<v Speaker 3>ain't get your A.S.S. off my C.A.M.

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<v Speaker 4>Phone.

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<v Speaker 3>Now, do you understand me? I ain't got time for

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<v Speaker 3>this pollution.

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<v Speaker 4>Sir, can I say one more thing?

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<v Speaker 3>What you got to say to me now?

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<v Speaker 4>I just wanted to let you know that this is

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<v Speaker 4>Nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvey Morning Show. Your wife, Althea,

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<v Speaker 4>got me to prank phone call you.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh, man, no. Oh, Lordy. Doc, Doc, yeah. Uh-huh. Doc, yeah,

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<v Speaker 3>I almost went in on you, Doc. You almost made

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<v Speaker 3>me go there. Yeah, I'm good.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel you.

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<v Speaker 3>I feel you put you up to this.

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<v Speaker 4>I feel you got me to prank you, man.

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<v Speaker 3>Wow, man.

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<v Speaker 4>So I got to ask you something, man. What is

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<v Speaker 4>the baddest, and I mean the baddest, radio show in

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<v Speaker 4>the land?

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<v Speaker 3>The Steve Harvey Morning Show, man.

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<v Speaker 4>What?

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<v Speaker 1>And there you have it.

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<v Speaker 2>So some of y'all might want to, you know, you

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<v Speaker 2>might want to check these pastors that officiated your wedding.

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<v Speaker 2>You might want to talk to them.

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<v Speaker 1>What about you, Nephew Tommy? Are you married? Yeah, I'm married. Yeah, well,

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<v Speaker 1>we got, man, we had two pastors there. I know

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<v Speaker 1>we married. A second opinion. We had two of them.

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<v Speaker 1>They orchestrated it together. It was two of them. Yes, yes,

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<v Speaker 1>we is married.

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<v Speaker 2>All right, October 22nd, 23rd, 24th, Comedy Zone, that is

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<v Speaker 2>in Greensboro, Greensboro, North Cackalacky. The Nephew is coming to

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<v Speaker 2>town October 22nd, 23rd, 24th. Y'all come up in there.

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<v Speaker 2>The Nephew coming to town. Comedy Zone laying in the cut.

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<v Speaker 2>Halloween weekend. Jacksonville, Florida. 29, 30, 31. Nephew coming. Tickets

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<v Speaker 2>on sale right now. That's what's laying in the cut

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<v Speaker 2>for October.

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<v Speaker 3>All right?

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<v Speaker 1>All my ass clear.

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<v Speaker 2>Laying in the cut after that. Pensacola, Florida. That would

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<v Speaker 2>be y'all raw. November the 14th.

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<v Speaker 1>All right. Yeah, that's where that is. Pensacola. Yes.

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<v Speaker 2>At the Sanger Theater in Pensacola. Thank you, Shirley, so kindly.

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<v Speaker 1>You are so welcome. You're listening to the Steve Harvey

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<v Speaker 1>Morning Show.