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Speaker 1: My daughter in law told me she was infertile. I

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Speaker 1: laughed in her face. But what happened next. I never

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Speaker 1: would have expected that.

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Speaker 2: Opie is pregnant. No, that would be unexpected. Oh if

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Speaker 2: Opi is pregnant, yeah, or if Opie's partner was pregnant.

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Speaker 1: And then they laugh in Opita's face. Ooh, the reverse

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Speaker 1: laugh payback. Or maybe just maybe Opie's daughter is a

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Speaker 1: comedian and it was a joke and the mother was

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Speaker 1: just being a supportive audience member by laughing, Come on

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Speaker 1: her face, not at her with her.

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Speaker 2: It's called timing.

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Speaker 1: It's called timing. Okay, No, that's not what's happening. But

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Speaker 1: I will tell you what's happening. I'm sixty four, rainy

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Speaker 1: on reddish, let's go, and I have one son, Robert,

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Speaker 1: with my late husband James.

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Speaker 3: What was he late for a living?

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Speaker 2: You're they?

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Speaker 1: Robert is Cage's Zarah, who was thirty five. Last Sunday,

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Speaker 1: Sarah and Robert came to my house for dinner. We

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Speaker 1: were chatting and I told them a story about James,

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Speaker 1: who Sarah unfortunately never got to meet, you know, because

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Speaker 1: he was late.

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Speaker 3: Where is he James?

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Speaker 2: James?

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Speaker 1: Why are you always late for everything. While I was pregnant,

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Speaker 1: James was very excited and insisted on putting together everything,

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Speaker 1: cribs and changing tables. Bless his poor little dead heart.

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Speaker 1: But my James was not much of a carpenter, and

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Speaker 1: one day, when I was putting Robert in his crib,

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Speaker 1: the whole thing broke and our baby died.

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Speaker 2: You're on one today.

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Speaker 1: I managed to catch Robert just in time, so no

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Speaker 1: harm was done, thankfully. Why would you put your precious

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Speaker 1: child in some shoddy craftsmanship.

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Speaker 2: And like, if you built it, you low key know

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Speaker 2: that it ain't good.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, like I'm imagining, Like I don't know if you've

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Speaker 1: ever seen that Simpsons thing where they like make a

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Speaker 1: birdhouse and it's just his birdhouse ever Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, dude,

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Speaker 1: you know you made a shitty birdhouse.

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Speaker 2: Come on.

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Speaker 1: After the story, I made a joke along the lines

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Speaker 1: of Sarah never having that problem if they have children,

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Speaker 1: because Robert is actually a carpenter.

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Speaker 3: But then she burst into tears and asked me why

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Speaker 3: I was being so cruel.

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Speaker 1: I was taken aback and asked her what was wrong,

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Speaker 1: as I certainly had it meant to make her upset,

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Speaker 1: and I was sorry.

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Speaker 2: If I asked, don't you compliment my husband's carpeage?

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Speaker 1: How dare you bring up woodworking? Would you know why

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Speaker 1: husband's would don't work? She told me that she discovered

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Speaker 1: recently that Sarah is infertile. Ah, so it's not the

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Speaker 1: wood that don't work, it's what's under her hood that

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Speaker 1: don't work. And she would never be able to have

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Speaker 1: children even with IVF Oh, that sucks.

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Speaker 3: That sucks.

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Speaker 1: Literally the last story, like the last lady was able

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Speaker 1: to have three kids.

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Speaker 3: A punch in the face.

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Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, this is cousin. This is cousin. E

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Speaker 2: villain origin story has come out of the woodwork.

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Speaker 1: I apologize profusely and said if I had known, I

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Speaker 1: would never have made a joke about it, but we would,

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Speaker 1: ye Dave's I struggled with having Robert and we were

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Speaker 1: never able to give him siblings. So I felt awful

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Speaker 1: that I had hurt Sarah like that. The mood was ruined,

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Speaker 1: really say after that, and Robert and Sarah decided to

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Speaker 1: leave early. Dang, than that's you know, at least they

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Speaker 1: didn't leave. Late on Tuesday, I ran into Robert's best

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Speaker 1: friend and his wife while I was out shopping. His

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Speaker 1: wife is good friends with Sarah and seemed unusually cold

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Speaker 1: to me. Maybe they were in the frozen food session.

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Speaker 1: Oh God, like Lego Tobagoes, he's cold arted. I asked why,

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Speaker 1: and she said she hadn't known I was rude, and

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Speaker 1: that I would be ashamed of mocking Sarah's infertility. But

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Speaker 1: it's not what happened, not all what happened. Sometimes the

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Speaker 1: grape vine gives bad info.

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Speaker 2: It's really that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, who would have thought the grapevine is usually one

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Speaker 1: hundred percent quality?

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Speaker 2: Exactly?

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Speaker 1: No one gossips changes the story as it goes from

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Speaker 1: Burson to Berson. It turns out that the story has

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Speaker 1: been spread, and it was told that I viciously inshulted

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Speaker 1: Sarah and insinuated she shouldn't marry Robert.

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Speaker 2: We literally went from a compliment on carpentry too. You

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Speaker 2: should not be married like Robert would don't work.

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Speaker 3: I know, woom don't work.

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Speaker 2: Y'all shouldn't be married them ws ain't working.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, those Peni and Vagina aren't coupled the way

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Speaker 1: that they should know.

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Speaker 2: They ain't.

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Speaker 3: No, they ain't.

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Speaker 2: This is so ridiculous.

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Speaker 1: The story even got back to our family, and a

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Speaker 1: lot of her relatives are quite upset with me the

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Speaker 1: story what's going on. But now I'm wondering if I

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Speaker 1: really did overstep that badly and insult Sarah horribly. I

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Speaker 1: don't want to be a bad mother in law, and

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Speaker 1: I get along quite well with Sarah ordinarily.

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Speaker 3: Am I the whole here? John? Give me your quick

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Speaker 3: input one sentence, but of I is she the a hole?

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Speaker 2: And what you.

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Speaker 1: Predict is gonna happen next? Because damn bad, godly gosh,

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Speaker 1: there's an update.

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Speaker 2: Like like a conservative Mormon, I see no a holes here.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if that made sense, But.

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Speaker 1: The a whole might be the Mormon loophole for not

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Speaker 1: having sex before marriage.

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Speaker 2: That is true, only the loophole that is another loophole.

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Speaker 1: There's multiple idea, there's multiples that you can loop into.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but you know, not the hill, I say, I say,

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Speaker 2: not that.

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Speaker 3: Hill, not the ahole.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Well, there is a little bit of an update,

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Speaker 1: at least some questions that were answered that you might

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Speaker 1: have sided to answer some questions. I haven't spoken to

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Speaker 1: Robert about the story spreading the way it did. I

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Speaker 1: thought it was best to give them space after the

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Speaker 1: dinner to process Sarah's diagnosis, but a lot of the

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Speaker 1: commenters are saying I should ask him about it and

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Speaker 1: thinking maybe right, that makes me think OPI is even

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Speaker 1: less the a hole than she already isn't two. I

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Speaker 1: haven't discussed future children with them before, as my own

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Speaker 1: mother in law was quite cruel to myself and James,

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Speaker 1: especially me since we only had Robert. James's siblings all

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Speaker 1: quite have large families, and until she sided, my mother

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Speaker 1: in law was very clear about who she blamed for

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Speaker 1: a lack of children. I decided early on in Sarah

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Speaker 1: and Robert's relationship that I wouldn't ask the typical questions

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Speaker 1: of when they would have children. But I've only met

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Speaker 1: Sarah's family once, so I don't know if her own relatives.

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Speaker 3: Pressure her in the way my mother law pressured me. Three.

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Speaker 1: I've also decided to reach out to Sarah and ask

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Speaker 1: if the two of us can talk. I think the

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Speaker 1: story spreading was really a case of telephone for sure. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but I would like to clear the air. The air

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Speaker 1: needs to be cleared, and the telephone wire needs to

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Speaker 1: be stripped down and replaced with the new telephone wire,

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Speaker 1: because that connection is following that I'm going to discuss

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Speaker 1: and ask both of them over for a chat and

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Speaker 1: discuss the situation, as I don't want this to fester.

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Speaker 1: I haven't decided what I'm going to do about clearing

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Speaker 1: everything up with family, but it's not my concern. Robert

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Speaker 1: and Sarah are John, I'm gonna direct the attention over

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Speaker 1: to you. What do you think in that beautiful nogin

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Speaker 1: of yours?

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Speaker 2: Oh God, for sure, Opie not the ahole.

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Speaker 3: Opie not the ahole.

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Speaker 2: Honestly, probably Opie is the angel because like everyone's just

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Speaker 2: been like crapping on op left, right center.

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Speaker 3: She's covered poop.

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Speaker 2: And she's literally she's just taking it like like a champ.

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Speaker 2: You're like, oh, like, you know, it seems like a

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Speaker 2: game of tell fun all this stuff, and she like

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Speaker 2: feels so bad that she accidentally caused this pain. I

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Speaker 2: don't think that they were necessarily the ones that kind

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Speaker 2: of like start like fanning the flames and like the

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Speaker 2: you know what it evolved through in the game of telephone.

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Speaker 2: Do we know it could be? It could be, it

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Speaker 2: could be.

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Speaker 1: I'm not saying they definitely are the a hole right right,

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Speaker 1: like a guy with a match stick and a forest

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Speaker 1: fire behind him. I'm smelling smoke. I see you with

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Speaker 1: a match stick. Maybe they didn't cause a whole forest fire,

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Speaker 1: but they brought that first lee for sure.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah yeah maybe yeah. I was so I mean,

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Speaker 2: what do you think do you would you classify them

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Speaker 2: in the a whole category?

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Speaker 1: Not with one hundred yeah right, Like they could have

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Speaker 1: just said, you know this, you know, like rough situation

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Speaker 1: happened with her mother or like Sarah, I'm Sarah right now,

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Speaker 1: it's that rough sessuies happened her.

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Speaker 3: This rough situation happened with my mother in La and

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Speaker 3: she accidentally brought up something that made me sad. I

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Speaker 3: don't know why.

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Speaker 1: She's like a little bit of Glish right there, and

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Speaker 1: I could see like her starting that, and then there's like,

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Speaker 1: I know, like some freaking Karen.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, did that?

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Speaker 3: Like I can't believe she literally inssaulted you to her friends.

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Speaker 1: I can imagine like Karen, like a Karen friend being

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Speaker 1: like you should not take off.

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Speaker 3: So what we know?

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Speaker 1: What we know for a fact that it's either Sarah

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Speaker 1: or Robert, or it's someone within this telephone game, someone

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Speaker 1: in the grape vine there's a grape in the grapevine

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Speaker 1: that's rotten. We don't know who could be at the beginning,

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Speaker 1: could it be the middle, could be at the end.

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Speaker 1: But there's a rotten grape, and that grape is the

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Speaker 1: Ahle for sure.

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Speaker 2: You know what I wonder if someone in that line

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Speaker 2: of communication thought that like has a vendetta against op

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Speaker 2: and they're like, bro, this is my opportunity. Like Sarah

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Speaker 2: and Robert are already upset, so let me just like

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Speaker 2: kick in another like another little lie. That'll just snowball

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Speaker 2: even harder.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, see, we know this is what we need to do.

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Speaker 1: We need to go detective mode. We need to go

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Speaker 1: to the person that she saw in the grocery store

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Speaker 1: and be.

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Speaker 3: Like, ooh, dold you who don't do like hang her

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Speaker 3: off the building? Oh don't do.

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Speaker 2: They'll be like, who are you? Don't worry am or podcasters.

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Speaker 1: We're trying to get to the bottom, but we like

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Speaker 1: start a true crime podcast.

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Speaker 2: I mean podcasters are low key like crimes. They're low

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Speaker 2: key the new like investigators now, like come on solving

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Speaker 2: all the crimes out here.

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Speaker 1: If you don't have a couple of podcasters in your city,

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Speaker 1: it's gonna be rife with crime.

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Speaker 2: That would be a story is Batman, but it's a podcaster.

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Speaker 3: It's like, this is a city that knows how to

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Speaker 3: keep it secrets. But there's one man, one microphone that

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Speaker 3: stands between you and.

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Speaker 2: The com It's Mike Man, Mike Man or Mike woman, Mike,

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Speaker 2: Mike not non binary, not having a stroke, non binary.

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Speaker 3: Non binary mic man, Mike.

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Speaker 2: Or you just call them Mike.

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Speaker 1: But John, I heard you have a few thunk a

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Speaker 1: thought story.

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Speaker 2: I got a fat funk.

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Speaker 3: Give me that funky thunk.

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Speaker 2: So am we made some pregnancy observations here, Oh we did,

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Speaker 2: But I am switching gears to ovulation situations.

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Speaker 1: Ovulation. I'm always scared of that time. Well, let's just

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Speaker 1: say that me and my girlfriend. I track my girlfriend's periods.

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Speaker 1: Let's just say just say that. Just just say that

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Speaker 1: and nothing more. Professor accuses me of cheating, but I

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Speaker 1: prove him wrong.

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Speaker 3: I'm actually a genius. Okay, OPI this is okay, op.

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Speaker 1: I'm Samuel Daughter and I'm John Fry and we tell

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Speaker 1: the funniest stories on the Internet. And John, I used

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Speaker 1: to So I used to study engineering at UCLA and

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Speaker 1: one of the main ways you would prepare for the

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Speaker 1: test is you would go to the test bank. Do

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Speaker 1: you have did you ever have a test test bank? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: the test bank. You know about test banks. So basically

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Speaker 1: it was a either you had it for for your

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Speaker 1: fraternity or your club, or sometimes the school would have

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Speaker 1: it and every person that was part of that club

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Speaker 1: that came before would give their old tests to the

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Speaker 1: test bank and to study, you would go look through

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Speaker 1: all these old tests.

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Speaker 2: Right.

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Speaker 1: Often for our ancient, ridiculously old professors, they were like,

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Speaker 1: I gave up teaching a long time ago, so they

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Speaker 1: wouldn't really teach the class. But two they would reuse

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Speaker 1: all of their questions for like decades, let's go. And

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Speaker 1: so often you would go and get you know, get

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Speaker 1: a get a test from the test bank, and it

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Speaker 1: would be question for question what was on the test

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Speaker 1: that was given that day? Glorious, But what really sucked

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Speaker 1: is if you didn't have the test bank or didn't

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Speaker 1: know about the test bank, the test was really hard. Right,

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Speaker 1: So this story actually relates to that that dilemma of

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Speaker 1: test or be tested.

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Speaker 2: One very quick quip, I passed my online driver's perma

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Speaker 2: test entirely through y'all who answers, So shout out yeah,

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Speaker 2: who answers.

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Speaker 1: Shout out Yahoo answers. Thank you for taking it before.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for taking the test before us.

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Speaker 2: That's right. Professor accuses me of cheating, but I prove

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Speaker 2: him wrong.

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Speaker 3: I'm actually a genius.

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Speaker 1: When I was in college, I took a class with

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Speaker 1: this gem of a professor.

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Speaker 3: On the first day of class, he house, oh.

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Speaker 2: Many people thought they would get today?

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Speaker 1: This being an engineering school where a sea actually was average.

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Speaker 1: Something like five students at the class of sixty raised

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Speaker 1: their hands and then he announced, that's so many a's

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Speaker 1: he would give out, that's some MESSU. So you just

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Speaker 1: asked the students, Hey, how many a's you want? Five

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Speaker 1: people raise their hands?

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Speaker 2: Have more self confidence?

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Speaker 3: Come on.

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Speaker 1: All of our tests for that class were multiple choice

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Speaker 1: exams we took online. We were allowed to refer to

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Speaker 1: our notes during the test, and we were allowed to

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Speaker 1: study from old tests as long as we didn't refer

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Speaker 1: to the old test during the exam. Fair enough, I

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Speaker 1: studied for the first test but didn't have access to

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Speaker 1: any old exams, so I did fine but not great.

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Speaker 1: By the time the second exam rolled around, I had

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Speaker 1: made a friend who was in a fraternity that had

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Speaker 1: multiple copies of old exams from this professor. Huh, We

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Speaker 1: and a couple of others took advantage of the rule

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Speaker 1: allowing us to study for old tests. We quickly discovered

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Speaker 1: that on these fifty question tests, the professor had a

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Speaker 1: repertoire of about seventy five questions he pulled from on

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Speaker 1: the first copy of the test we studied from. We

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Speaker 1: took the time to work through the answers to make

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Speaker 1: sure that we understood each in every one of them.

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Speaker 1: But the time we got to the fourth copy, we

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Speaker 1: could answer before we even finished reading the question, so

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Speaker 1: they were freaking prepared. Wow, exam time rolls around, just

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Speaker 1: as with previous years. He pulled the questions he asked

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Speaker 1: in the exam from the same file of questions. I

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Speaker 1: think it took me about twelve minutes to answer everything correctly.

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Speaker 1: It was supposed to be an hour test.

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Speaker 2: Okay, you can't. You can't go that hard. They like

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Speaker 2: that hard. Just do the twelve minutes and then just

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Speaker 2: doodle for just wait, eighteen minutes he nail himself away.

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Speaker 1: Oh good, hindsight, I probably should have let the clock

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Speaker 1: run for a bit. We had an hour, but I

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Speaker 1: went ahead and submitted it because I had other things

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Speaker 1: to do. I checked in with the others I studied

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Speaker 1: with the next day, and all of them had gotten

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Speaker 1: that ninety percent plus sweet definitely using that plan for

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Speaker 1: test three and the final. The next day, we all

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Speaker 1: received an email from the professor letting us know that

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Speaker 1: we are being reported to the dean for an hoor

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Speaker 1: A code violation. No he claimed that he had never

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Speaker 1: in all his skears had anyone make better than in

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Speaker 1: eighty on one of his tests before, so the fact

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Speaker 1: that we made all over ninety percent was clear proof

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Speaker 1: that we had d.

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Speaker 2: And he's been teaching for one hundred years, so you know,

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Speaker 2: it's rare.

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Speaker 1: This being an engineering school. We were all nerds and

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Speaker 1: we're pretty scared about receiving such an email, but we

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Speaker 1: agreed the best course of action was to talk to

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Speaker 1: the professor before he went to the dean, to tell

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Speaker 1: our side of the story and see if we could

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Speaker 1: sort things out. We reached out to him and he

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Speaker 1: agreed to meet with us after class. When we met

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Speaker 1: with him and laid out our case, he was surprisingly

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Speaker 1: receptive to our explanation. I think in reality he didn't

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Speaker 1: want to go through the hassle of reporting us all

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Speaker 1: to the Dean because he was old, said in his ways,

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Speaker 1: and didn't want to do much work. So we left

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Speaker 1: the meeting feeling pretty good and agreed within our study

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Speaker 1: group we would keep studying from the old tests. Well

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Speaker 1: about a week before test three, this professor announces to

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Speaker 1: the class that.

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Speaker 3: Because some of us had found the previous t just

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Speaker 3: so easy, the next one would have twice as many

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Speaker 3: questions in the same amount of time.

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Speaker 1: And then, being the cheeky sob I am, I asked

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Speaker 1: him as I was leaving the class, what would happen

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Speaker 1: if someone made one hundred on this test? He said,

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Speaker 1: God help you on the final. So we use the

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Speaker 1: same approach in studying for the test and found the

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Speaker 1: same pattern of a limited set of questions. Of course,

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Speaker 1: in addition to the extra questions, he had promised all

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Speaker 1: the questions on this test would be new. So while

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Speaker 1: we again got to the point we had the questions

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Speaker 1: and answers memorized, we tried to make sure we understood

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Speaker 1: the concepts as much as possible to deal with what

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Speaker 1: we expected to be his wrath. So basically they were

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Speaker 1: just studying really well. Yeah, yeah, they were actually understanding.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, just to understand.

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Speaker 1: The answer test day comes around, and lo and behold,

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Speaker 1: eighty seven of the questions are pulled directly from old tests,

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Speaker 1: ten are from a guest lecture where he basically pulled

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Speaker 1: the question and answered directly from the slides, and three

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Speaker 1: were filler questions like what's one plus one equal? And

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Speaker 1: the earth revolves around the sun for a false?

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Speaker 2: This guy's so lazy.

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Speaker 1: I know he can't even he says, face my wrath

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Speaker 1: and his wrath are.

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Speaker 3: What's one plus one two?

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Speaker 1: I knew I had everything right. I also knew I

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Speaker 1: didn't want to screw myself and everyone else for the final.

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Speaker 1: I purposely answered the filler questions incorrectly, so if he

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Speaker 1: looked at the results, he.

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Speaker 3: Would know what I had done.

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Speaker 1: I got my ninety seven, and I never heard from

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Speaker 1: the professor about that third test, but I like to

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Speaker 1: think of him rage scrolling through the results.

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Speaker 3: Like, oh get those kids?

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Speaker 2: What day.

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Speaker 1: I don't remember the details about the final, but I

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Speaker 1: do remember the form that being the same exact thing

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Speaker 1: as what had been announced at the beginning of the semester.

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Speaker 1: My study group also worked together on the group project

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Speaker 1: where we made a's and so on. So if he

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Speaker 1: really only gave out five a's that semester, we received

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Speaker 1: all of them.

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Speaker 2: Wow. Man, oh great, great job. I'm a college dropout,

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Speaker 2: so I appreciate cheating and stuff like that.

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Speaker 1: Oh he just studied, well like that's you know, he

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Speaker 1: he just did. He just used the resources at his

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Speaker 1: disposal and and uh and got around the system.

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Speaker 2: It was. It was kind of a combination deep study

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Speaker 2: and cheating. I feel like, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 1: Like, well, it wasn't cheating because the professor said he could,

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Speaker 1: they could study from old tests.

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Speaker 2: He could. They just got is true. But they memorized

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Speaker 2: lots of questions that right.

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Speaker 1: Well you're so you're like, study from this test, but

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Speaker 1: don't memorize any answers. Well yeah, yeah, if he really

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Speaker 1: got everything down, he memorized everything.

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Speaker 3: But you know what you should memorize.

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Speaker 2: Ooh. The subscribe button for okop.

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Speaker 1: Subscribe on YouTube, follow us on Spotify and TikTok, and

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Speaker 1: if you really want to be a support, support us

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Speaker 1: on Patreon.

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Speaker 2: Join Amanda Wilcomb's, Conor van Buren, Keegan Simmons, and Kathy Quigley.

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Speaker 3: See soon