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Speaker 1: Yes, Brandon Bang and I am Rapports Stereo podcast. This here,

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Speaker 1: Have no fear. I am Rappaport Stereo podcast, Museum professional

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Speaker 1: podcasting coming straight from the gloom tomb of New York City.

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Speaker 1: On today's podcast, my Guy, my father Disco Dave took

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Speaker 1: a little fall, but he is fine. He is just fine.

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Speaker 1: I break that down. Plus, Texas is getting sued, The

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Speaker 1: State of Texas is getting sued, and Dean Collins the

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Speaker 1: Young Shooter is back with more sex capades with a Brazilian.

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Speaker 1: Oh yes, all that morning, Brand new, banging, fully loaded.

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Speaker 1: I am Rappaport Stereo podcasts coming up right now. Miles,

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Speaker 1: Jordan A K, The Dust brothers Ak the Bleach brother

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Speaker 1: start propping, real nice, start to pup people with something real,

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Speaker 1: proper think the most important. Start this motherfucker off with

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Speaker 1: something real, loud and real fucking this. This is iron

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Speaker 1: Rappaport Stereo Podcast. Oh let's sucking. Boom huh oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'll do it one more time. Boom. Oh Yes, brand

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Speaker 1: new bang and I am wrapp Reports Stereo podcast is here, Higgy,

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Speaker 1: have no fear. Oh the I Am Wrappaport Stereo podcast

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Speaker 1: is into constant that means in the house. The name

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Speaker 1: is Michael Rappaport a k A Mr. Go funk Yourself

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Speaker 1: a k A Mr New York a KA. Captain Collidus

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Speaker 1: from the Caucus Mountains a k. The Disruptive Warrior. You're

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Speaker 1: now rocking with the very best. See I am Rappaport

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Speaker 1: Stereo Podcast, the Iron Dome of podcasting. Welcome to the

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Speaker 1: Zone of disruption. Hope everybody's good to hope everybody is safe.

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Speaker 1: I hope everybody is sane. I hope everybody's feeling real good,

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Speaker 1: real nice and uh a real proper. I know, I am.

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Speaker 1: The fucking NFL season has started. Oh my goodness, the

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Speaker 1: NFL season has started. Last night, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers

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Speaker 1: went on to defeat dem Boys the Dallas Cowboys. But

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Speaker 1: the NFL is here. Are you ready for some football?

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Speaker 1: I know, I am. I know. My wife ain't not

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Speaker 1: that she don't like football. My wife she likes football players.

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Speaker 1: I don't think she actually likes watching the game, but

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Speaker 1: like hard knocks and inside the NFL it's like soft

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Speaker 1: porn ship to her. For real, straight the funk up.

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Speaker 1: I'm watching it to learn study. She's like watching it

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Speaker 1: it's like a fucking it's like some showtime after dark

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Speaker 1: ship watching these guys pump steel, run, tackle dummies and

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Speaker 1: all that. Ship. She's into that. As far as me

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Speaker 1: watching an entire sunday of games, she complains, I go

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Speaker 1: sit down and watch it. The linebacker for the Detroit Lions,

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Speaker 1: he's cute. Look at him about the score, touched on

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Speaker 1: that big dumb fuck check them out, dummy. She don't

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Speaker 1: want to do that. She'll watch a game here and there.

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Speaker 1: She don't know what the fund is going on, no clue.

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Speaker 1: It's like watching a fashion show. If I got to

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Speaker 1: watch a fashion show women, they're seeing things differently. Football.

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Speaker 1: They're seeing it like if I sat there and went

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Speaker 1: to some I don't know versace show, I'm like, fuck,

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Speaker 1: oh yeah, the model, she's hot. Same thing. But it's

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Speaker 1: not the my wife and telling you I know all

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Speaker 1: the players she likes, the coaches. Okay, the saying about her.

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Speaker 1: This is about Champion Chip weekend. What do you mean

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Speaker 1: it's championship weekend. It just started. This is when you

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Speaker 1: start sucking winning the championship this week, especially in fantasy football,

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Speaker 1: there's no warming up, there's no we're getting into the

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Speaker 1: swing of things. There's no ebbs and flows. You have

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Speaker 1: to get out there. You have to kick fucking ass

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Speaker 1: right off the top. Boom, kick fucking ass right off

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Speaker 1: the top. That's what we do. Okay. The drafts are done,

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Speaker 1: the hemming, the hwing, it's done. Now. Just about fucking,

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Speaker 1: just about fucking not not literally, figuratively, kicking fucking ass

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Speaker 1: week after week. Starts on Thursday, you kick gas on Sunday,

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Speaker 1: and then you finish them on Monday, week after week,

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Speaker 1: week after week. And I love it. I love it all. Okay,

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Speaker 1: hopefully the next time you hear from me, you will

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Speaker 1: be hearing me screaming, yelling in fits of joy. Of course,

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Speaker 1: if I lose, scream yell fits of pain agne. But

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Speaker 1: nonetheless I don't hide, I don't counter when I lose.

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Speaker 1: Anybody who's ship talking extraordinaire, like myself, a ship talking connoisseur,

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Speaker 1: a connoisseura of ship talking. Anyone can talk ship when

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Speaker 1: they are winning. Like Michael Jordan's said in the Last Dance,

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Speaker 1: it takes a real man, a real fucking man to

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Speaker 1: do it. When you're Downplay that clip from the Last Dance,

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Speaker 1: that iconic clip when Michael Jordan was holding his baseball bat.

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Speaker 1: I forgot who they were playing. Maybe they were playing,

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Speaker 1: uh Charlotte. After B J. Armstrong left the Bulls, he

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Speaker 1: started talking greasy, talking greasy on the yard to Michael

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Speaker 1: Jordans like he didn't know what was gonna come. That's

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Speaker 1: when motherfucker you you never wanted to get get going.

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Speaker 1: There's other ones, but that motherfucker you didn't want to

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Speaker 1: get him. Gonna play that clip from the Last Dance

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Speaker 1: Michael Jordan's. I see if all that trash talking starts

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Speaker 1: when it's zero zero instead of five six point league,

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Speaker 1: that's just trying of a good man. If you can

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Speaker 1: talk to it when it even score, or talk when

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Speaker 1: you're behind, but when you're head, it's well put. That

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Speaker 1: is well put from Michael Jordan's. Anybody could and I'm

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Speaker 1: not just talking about fantasy football. I'm talking about life,

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Speaker 1: talking about business, talking about elections, I'm talking about everything.

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Speaker 1: Anybody could talk ship when you're up, it takes a

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Speaker 1: real man to do it when things aren't going your way.

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Speaker 1: And as far as I'm concerned, that's when I'm at

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Speaker 1: my best. When you have me trapped like a fucking

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Speaker 1: caged caged possum. Most people don't use that analogy. I do.

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Speaker 1: That's why you're listening to the podcast. I had a

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Speaker 1: possum caged outside my house once. He wasn't happy, okay,

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Speaker 1: but he was fighting. That's when you're at your best.

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Speaker 1: That's when I'm at my best dress. That's why we

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Speaker 1: drest mock draft. Anyway, I truly hope everybody is feeling good.

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Speaker 1: If you've never listened to the Iron Wrap Ports Stereo podcast, welcome,

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Speaker 1: so so glad to have you here. The Iron Wrap

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Speaker 1: Ports Stereo podcast is no longer behind a paywall. The

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Speaker 1: Iron Wrap Ports Stereo podcast is on Apple, Spotify, Stitcher,

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Speaker 1: and a whole bunch of other places. Okay, if you're

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Speaker 1: listening to this, obviously you know that. But I still

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Speaker 1: have people hitting me, oh I haven't seen anything. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: have you looked on Apple, Spotify, Stitcher. They're like, oh, okay,

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Speaker 1: I've only said it nine thousand times on all of

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Speaker 1: my social media platforms, the Big four on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook,

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Speaker 1: and of course TikTok. You know, I have actual people

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Speaker 1: walk up to me on the street. I'm fifty one.

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Speaker 1: Actual people walk up to me on the street and

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Speaker 1: they say to me, I love your TikTok man, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: you know on my Instagram, Like, no, I'm not. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: you're growing up telling another growing up that you love

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Speaker 1: my TikTok. That's what you're telling me. Out of all

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Speaker 1: the things you can ask me. I'm right here in

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Speaker 1: front of you. Wanna talk to me about the TikTok?

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Speaker 1: But you don't. I'm just happy that you're you're listening.

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Speaker 1: I'm just happy that you're following. I'm happy that you're

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Speaker 1: you're into it. All. Okay, Uh, where should I start? Texas?

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Speaker 1: They shut that ship down. Now you've got problems with

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Speaker 1: the A A G. The Attorney General. They're not they're

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Speaker 1: not playing games out there. Uh, they're cutting this ship,

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Speaker 1: you know, this goofy ship that they're trying to do

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Speaker 1: out there with the abortions in all this cookiness, you

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Speaker 1: can't do it, the Attorney General said. After a careful

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Speaker 1: assessment of the facts and the law, the Justice Department

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Speaker 1: defiling a lawsuit against the entire state of Texas. No

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Speaker 1: thanks to any NBA athletes, No thanks to w NBA athletes,

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Speaker 1: no thanks to any NFL players. Crickets crickets from these people.

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Speaker 1: But hopefully this will do away with this cockamami ship

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Speaker 1: that they're trying to do out there in Texas, with

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Speaker 1: these horrifying rules and regulations that they're trying to set

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Speaker 1: up out there where you can't get an abortion at

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Speaker 1: after six weeks, where you can't do this, where you

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Speaker 1: can't do that, and if you do any of that,

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Speaker 1: Joe Schmo can sue you. That's what's going on out there.

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Speaker 1: And also they have other incentives across this. This this

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Speaker 1: this fucking place man doing some wild ship. They're doing

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Speaker 1: some crazy ship in San Francisco and San Francisco, they're

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Speaker 1: paying people, criminals only, criminals, not regular folks, three hundred

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Speaker 1: dollars a month to not shoot other people. They're paying

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Speaker 1: criminals with records, you have to have a certain kind

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Speaker 1: of record in San Francisco three hundred dollars a month

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Speaker 1: to not well, to not get caught shooting another person.

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Speaker 1: And if you don't get caught shooting another person, you

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Speaker 1: can get three hundred dollars a month. What the fund

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Speaker 1: is the world coming to where you can sue people

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Speaker 1: getting abortions for ten thousand dollars And under this new

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Speaker 1: dream Keeper Fellowship in San Francisco. They will pay ex

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Speaker 1: criminals to stay on the straight and narrow. The funk

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Speaker 1: is going on here. This is like yo, you can

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Speaker 1: make money out of here being a piece of ship,

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Speaker 1: but you have to have a certain record. So you

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Speaker 1: have to have a certain criminal record to get this

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Speaker 1: three d dollars a month to not shoot other people,

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Speaker 1: and you could become a quote unquote public safety ambassador.

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Speaker 1: Buck is going on out here. San Francisco is a mess.

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Speaker 1: I'm performing in San Francisco. I can't wait. I can't wait.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna be in Miami next week too. I can't

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Speaker 1: wait for that. I'm gonna be in Miami doing five

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Speaker 1: shows and three nights eight and nineteen, and then Nashville

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Speaker 1: and then San Diego the thirty, the first and the second.

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Speaker 1: Then I'm gonna be in l A Chilling. Then you know,

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Speaker 1: it's gonna be October. Then I'm gonna be in Philadelphia

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Speaker 1: October six. I'm gonna be in Orlando the of October,

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Speaker 1: and then like I said, I'll be in San Francisco

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Speaker 1: the top of November, the fifth, sixth, and seven. There's

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Speaker 1: plenty of other cities, plenty of other stops on the

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Speaker 1: The Viral Load Comedy Tour. But I'm rocking and rolling

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Speaker 1: with right now The Viral Load Comedy Tour. All tickets,

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Speaker 1: all information is available in Michael Rapperford Comedy dot com.

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Speaker 1: And like I said, I'll be in Miami next week.

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Speaker 1: And yes, the answer to your question is yes, I

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Speaker 1: will be wearing my banana hammock on the beach a

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Speaker 1: few days early. Yes, I will be getting a crisp

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Speaker 1: tan on the beaches in a banana hammock, so I

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Speaker 1: look fantastic from my shows next week in Miami. Yes,

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Speaker 1: A lot of people have asked, I don't even know

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Speaker 1: why I have to keep answering the question. Duh. Of course,

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Speaker 1: banana hammock, crisp tan. I have that banana hammock pulled

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Speaker 1: up my ass so the whole ass can get that

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Speaker 1: nice tan. I don't want those tan lines. Okay, well

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Speaker 1: my cheeks out, okay, get that whole fucking ass nice crisp,

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Speaker 1: light brown. I don't want to become like a fucking

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Speaker 1: turkey out there. I don't want like a char broil, Okay,

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Speaker 1: I want a nice, nice, crisp light brown. What else

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Speaker 1: is going on? I got the shooter coming on here.

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Speaker 1: Apparently he's got some more tales from Tales from Brazil.

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Speaker 1: Well he's got himself into twine with another Brazilian. Scott

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Speaker 1: doesn't know. He think. He thinks the ship is sweet.

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Speaker 1: I go, these girls that are up there from l A,

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Speaker 1: up there from Brazil in l A. They got their

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Speaker 1: only fans account and all this ship. Watch you, you're

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Speaker 1: just a nice, nice guy funk around the still your

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Speaker 1: cat fucking girls up there and playing. I hope this

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Speaker 1: guy don't get a get caught out there. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: get him on the phone in a minute. My father,

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Speaker 1: Disco Dave Rappaport, who's eight. I see this father, this

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Speaker 1: guy the other day, and I'm gonna have coffee with

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Speaker 1: my father. Right I see him. He walks up to me.

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Speaker 1: He's gotta fucking not a little band aid like the

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Speaker 1: double sized bandages on his head. It's got like a

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Speaker 1: little black eye on the side of his Faceicle, what

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Speaker 1: the funk happened to you? He goes. I film, I

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Speaker 1: go what because I fell? I go, what the funk

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Speaker 1: are you talking about? Because I'm worried. You know, I'm

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Speaker 1: not arguing with him, but He's like, I fell a tripped,

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Speaker 1: fell on my head, right on my head. Boom. I go,

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Speaker 1: what the fund are you talking about? No one wants

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Speaker 1: to see your father like this is a big gas

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Speaker 1: bandage on his head and a black eyed thing on

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Speaker 1: his you know, like he felt cut on his head.

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Speaker 1: Tells me the story over and over. I'm like, who

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Speaker 1: who was there? This one that? When his friend was there?

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Speaker 1: I said, you go to the doctor. He goes, no,

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Speaker 1: Why I said, why you didn't call me? Because I

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Speaker 1: knew you would get upset. I go, yeah, I get upset.

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Speaker 1: Eighty eight years old. You fell on your fucking head.

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Speaker 1: You're looking at falling your nose, because if you think

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Speaker 1: I got a big nose, my father's noses, they don't

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Speaker 1: make noses like that. They literally, uh, they don't make

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Speaker 1: noses the size of my father's anymore. These are prehistoric,

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Speaker 1: old school big like, these are old school beaks. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm telling you the evolution of man. They're like, we

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Speaker 1: we don't need this much room to breathe with a

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Speaker 1: nose that size. It's almost twice the size of my nose,

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Speaker 1: and my nose is ginormous. But I was like, very upset,

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Speaker 1: to see my father with the big bandage on his head.

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Speaker 1: He said, you gotta put a hat on. You look

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Speaker 1: insane out here. You look crazy. You got a black guy,

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Speaker 1: you got this big bandage on your head. This is

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Speaker 1: after all you told me it was all right. I

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Speaker 1: made him repeat the story. A bunch of times. Happened

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Speaker 1: a couple of days ago. But it was very, very worrisome.

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Speaker 1: I said, I gotta tell the listeners. Everybody's always asking

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Speaker 1: how's disco date? He's fine right now. But I did

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Speaker 1: not like running into my father with a big bandage

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Speaker 1: on his head and a black eye. Very upsetting. But

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Speaker 1: you know, he's a guy, he's a guy. This is

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Speaker 1: what happens. He's an older guy. They fall. Older people fall. Unfortunately,

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Speaker 1: they fall, you know, they fall, and they hopefully they

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Speaker 1: get up. I don't know. I'm still not exactly sure

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Speaker 1: how it happened and why it happened. But he's fine.

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Speaker 1: He's still out here like me, breaking rules with solid stools.

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Speaker 1: I always asked him, how's your stools? That tell me?

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Speaker 1: Give me, you know, a report, tell me. He said, yeah,

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Speaker 1: they're good. They're good. They're so And I said, okay,

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Speaker 1: good because like me, I'm out of your breaking rules.

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Speaker 1: With solid stools, you always gotta check the stool. You know,

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00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:09,359
Speaker 1: it's not like a pleasant thing to look at, but

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Speaker 1: you gotta look. Okay, how's this looking? Is it healthy?

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Speaker 1: Strong as it? Put together? Father says he, is it

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00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:25,400
Speaker 1: put together? In mind? Are also put together? The NFL

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00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:52,919
Speaker 1: anywhere with my bookie. Now all right, well, now that

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Speaker 1: I mentioned the shooter in Brazil and my concerns about

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Speaker 1: his cat possibly being kidnapped by one of these, uh,

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Speaker 1: these are stragglers he keeps letting in and out of

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Speaker 1: his house in his life. Let me let me just

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Speaker 1: bring in the Young Shooter of Dean Collins, because everybody's

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Speaker 1: worried about you. Everybody's concerned about you, Dean Collins, the

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Speaker 1: young Shooter. How are you, my friends? I'm good man,

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Speaker 1: glad to be back. You were saying that like you

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Speaker 1: were concerned that people are kidnapping. What what did I

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Speaker 1: miss people are kidnapping. What I was saying is is

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Speaker 1: I said, I mentioned that the young shooter was going

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Speaker 1: to be back and tell me about some additional story

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Speaker 1: with a Brazilian. And then it dawned on me that

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Speaker 1: you know, you're letting these randoms into your world, into

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Speaker 1: your life, and you know it's not it's not far

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Speaker 1: fetched to think that maybe one of these girls one

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Speaker 1: day might might you know, who the fuck catfish you

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Speaker 1: or you know, they might scam you. The next thing

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Speaker 1: you know, you're getting phone calls from a a cell

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Speaker 1: phone in Nigeria and they're like, oh, I've got your cat.

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Speaker 1: We stole Pablo. You need to give us five thousand

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Speaker 1: dollars if we're not giving you this fucking cat back.

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Speaker 1: I mean, that could happen to somebody like you. You know,

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Speaker 1: you're not You're not what anybody would call um street smart.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes I'm like, I point thing, I'm like, yo, pay attention,

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00:20:20,359 --> 00:20:22,480
Speaker 1: where the funk you're at? You know, uh, so you

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00:20:22,520 --> 00:20:24,760
Speaker 1: don't know what the fund is going on. You're mixing

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00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:27,560
Speaker 1: and matching here on Tinder or grinder or what not.

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Speaker 1: You keep saying grinder and I've told you maybe a

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Speaker 1: hundred different times. That's actually a gay dating app. Like,

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00:20:32,960 --> 00:20:35,040
Speaker 1: that's not what I'm not on that. I don't have

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Speaker 1: that down it's a gay dating app. So I don't

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Speaker 1: have that downloaded. Like I I'm a straight male, not

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00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:43,399
Speaker 1: nothing against gay people whatsoever. I'm just I'm not I

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Speaker 1: don't go that way. But it's interesting that you say that,

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Speaker 1: because a lot of people are always like, oh, be careful,

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Speaker 1: you know, if you don't know this person, you've got

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Speaker 1: to be careful for yourself. You don't know what you're

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Speaker 1: getting involved in. You don't know them. But I didn't

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Speaker 1: think about the angle of them wanting to maybe kidnap

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Speaker 1: my cat like that. Actually I don't think they're kidnapping

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Speaker 1: your cat for anything but some ransom money. But be like, yo,

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Speaker 1: this guy likes this fucking cat. He thinks this cat

325
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Speaker 1: is like the brad Pit of cats. And I don't

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Speaker 1: think I know, like I know, because it's he just

327
00:21:13,240 --> 00:21:15,480
Speaker 1: happens to be like a really great looking cat. And

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Speaker 1: people always ask me where did you get the cat?

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00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:21,159
Speaker 1: And I tell them Paris, Um, But you didn't get

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Speaker 1: the cat in Paris, No, I did Paris. P E

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Speaker 1: R I s in California it's near San Diego. Um,

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Speaker 1: I actually is that the line you use, Know, it's

333
00:21:31,080 --> 00:21:33,160
Speaker 1: not a line that's it's literally where I got the cat.

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00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:35,479
Speaker 1: I got it in Paris, California. But it's it's just

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00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:38,040
Speaker 1: it happens to be, you know, two hours from my home.

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00:21:38,080 --> 00:21:40,119
Speaker 1: I had to go and get it. Um, he's a

337
00:21:40,119 --> 00:21:42,720
Speaker 1: great looking cat. But you're you're right. And UM, a

338
00:21:42,720 --> 00:21:45,320
Speaker 1: lot of women, they not a lot of women. Who

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00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:46,880
Speaker 1: am I to be like a lot of women, But

340
00:21:47,280 --> 00:21:50,320
Speaker 1: women tend to like Pablo. I mean, he's better looking

341
00:21:50,359 --> 00:21:53,040
Speaker 1: than me, and that's kind of the draw. Um. And

342
00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:55,920
Speaker 1: and that's that is a good looking cat. I don't

343
00:21:55,960 --> 00:21:59,720
Speaker 1: like it's a good looking cat. That does not mean

344
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:01,880
Speaker 1: that I like that cat. I don't like your cat.

345
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:04,480
Speaker 1: I don't think your cat has a warm personality at all.

346
00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:06,560
Speaker 1: But you can I think your cat is a little

347
00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:09,840
Speaker 1: bit okay, And it's Pablo a guy or a girl.

348
00:22:09,840 --> 00:22:11,640
Speaker 1: He's a guy, so you can't say he's a little bit.

349
00:22:12,119 --> 00:22:15,120
Speaker 1: But he's well, I think he acts like a little

350
00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:19,240
Speaker 1: pretty bitch. He acts like he acts like like a

351
00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:21,760
Speaker 1: little pretty bitch who's got a like a TikTok account

352
00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:24,600
Speaker 1: with like five million followers and like if you saw

353
00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:28,520
Speaker 1: Pablo at like a Starbucks, he'd be like Pablo like

354
00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:32,160
Speaker 1: on some Timothy Shamalay ship. Now I've heard Timothy Shamalay

355
00:22:32,240 --> 00:22:35,439
Speaker 1: is is cool. But like your cat like walks around

356
00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:38,800
Speaker 1: like your cats. I don't like your cat. I'm just

357
00:22:38,920 --> 00:22:42,040
Speaker 1: gonna say, get it. Leave it at that. I don't

358
00:22:42,040 --> 00:22:44,400
Speaker 1: like that. Leave it at that. It's just it's it's

359
00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:46,960
Speaker 1: a problem when you tried, you don't need to try.

360
00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:49,320
Speaker 1: He doesn't like anyone. He's evil. He's like grumpy cat.

361
00:22:49,359 --> 00:22:51,879
Speaker 1: But it's a problem when your cat is more attractive

362
00:22:51,920 --> 00:22:55,720
Speaker 1: than you. That that's it's a fact. It's actually a fact. Um.

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00:22:56,520 --> 00:22:59,520
Speaker 1: But anyway, yeah, man, I mean you were talking about Brazil.

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00:23:00,359 --> 00:23:02,919
Speaker 1: I was saying that you told me you had another

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00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:06,239
Speaker 1: situation with a Brazilian woman, and I said, and I

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00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:08,160
Speaker 1: teed it up. I said, I hope this fucking guy

367
00:23:08,240 --> 00:23:10,880
Speaker 1: isn't out here playing games because some of these, uh

368
00:23:10,920 --> 00:23:13,280
Speaker 1: you know, people from South America, they come up here,

369
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:15,960
Speaker 1: they're looking for assholes like you. Next thing, you know,

370
00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:17,879
Speaker 1: they steal your cat and they're like, yeah, we're not

371
00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:19,919
Speaker 1: giving you this fucking cat back unless you give us

372
00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:22,399
Speaker 1: five K. If you're lucky. It's five K. Forget the

373
00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:24,480
Speaker 1: green card and all that ship. We want your cat. No,

374
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:27,000
Speaker 1: they want that cash, motherfucker. They don't want the cat.

375
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:30,280
Speaker 1: They want the punish you under see see how see

376
00:23:30,280 --> 00:23:32,600
Speaker 1: how Gulobal you're you don't even know why they would

377
00:23:32,640 --> 00:23:34,520
Speaker 1: steal the cat. You're like, oh, because it's good looking. No,

378
00:23:34,680 --> 00:23:38,560
Speaker 1: they they know that you stand Look look that's you

379
00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:40,480
Speaker 1: didn't see Man on Fire. You didn't see the movie

380
00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:43,000
Speaker 1: with Dents Man on fire. They saw a man on fire.

381
00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:46,320
Speaker 1: I've seen Rush Hour. Okay, I understand how ransoms work,

382
00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:49,359
Speaker 1: all right, but this was actually a positive experience. This

383
00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:52,159
Speaker 1: wasn't you know what you thought it was. And I

384
00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:54,400
Speaker 1: don't know what it is about Brazilian women coming into

385
00:23:54,400 --> 00:23:57,320
Speaker 1: my life right now, but you know, I the listeners

386
00:23:57,400 --> 00:24:01,199
Speaker 1: heard my story about the first fail Brazilian date that

387
00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:04,000
Speaker 1: I had where she stood me up, and that really, uh,

388
00:24:04,040 --> 00:24:06,199
Speaker 1: you know that hurt u. I'm not gonna lie. It

389
00:24:06,280 --> 00:24:10,240
Speaker 1: did her. I don't know why. I don't know why

390
00:24:10,240 --> 00:24:12,560
Speaker 1: you're laughing, but it actually did hurt um to be

391
00:24:12,600 --> 00:24:15,200
Speaker 1: stood up and to actually, you know, clean my house

392
00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:17,400
Speaker 1: and get a housekeeper and get a fake spray tan.

393
00:24:17,440 --> 00:24:19,600
Speaker 1: Spray tan I know, you don't have to remind me

394
00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:21,680
Speaker 1: that I got a should put the spray tan first,

395
00:24:21,800 --> 00:24:23,840
Speaker 1: because that's the thing that everybody likes the best, is

396
00:24:23,880 --> 00:24:28,359
Speaker 1: like spray tan, clean my house, wash my car, spray tan.

397
00:24:28,520 --> 00:24:30,359
Speaker 1: You know, like it didn't you could say it twice,

398
00:24:30,560 --> 00:24:32,359
Speaker 1: you could do it like you could. You could book

399
00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:34,040
Speaker 1: end it with spray tan, because that's the thing that

400
00:24:34,080 --> 00:24:36,360
Speaker 1: puts it over the top. Thank you, man, I appreciate

401
00:24:36,359 --> 00:24:39,600
Speaker 1: you reminding me that. Um so, yeah, I know this one,

402
00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:42,600
Speaker 1: this one just kind of came about and she reached

403
00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:45,800
Speaker 1: out to me and a very very attractive woman. I

404
00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:48,639
Speaker 1: mean she's Brazilian. You know, it's like it just seems

405
00:24:48,680 --> 00:24:50,600
Speaker 1: like there's just something in the water out there were

406
00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:54,159
Speaker 1: all Brazilian women are just gorgeous, you know, and I

407
00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:58,000
Speaker 1: mean this is yeah, I mean you know, she she

408
00:24:59,080 --> 00:25:01,400
Speaker 1: they have a reputation and for that, she dropped something,

409
00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:03,480
Speaker 1: she dropped her standards. And I said, it nice to

410
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:05,920
Speaker 1: meet you. I'm dean, you know, because now, did you

411
00:25:06,359 --> 00:25:08,359
Speaker 1: crawl into your d M s or one of these

412
00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:11,960
Speaker 1: dating apps? She crawled into my d ms? She crawled

413
00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:15,080
Speaker 1: into your d M s out of nowhere. Yes, I

414
00:25:15,119 --> 00:25:17,720
Speaker 1: think that we may have matched on Tinder or something

415
00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:20,400
Speaker 1: like that, but I wasn't. Okay, Okay, wait wait wait, wait,

416
00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:22,920
Speaker 1: wait wait, because I know you're pretty good. Hold on,

417
00:25:24,080 --> 00:25:26,760
Speaker 1: you may have matched on Tinder somewhere and then she

418
00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:30,200
Speaker 1: crawled into your d M s and you're you're telling

419
00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:33,240
Speaker 1: me the truth here, Because now I feel I caught

420
00:25:33,240 --> 00:25:38,200
Speaker 1: a little a tone, I'm asking you again, let's just clarify,

421
00:25:38,280 --> 00:25:42,119
Speaker 1: because listen, you don't the Iron Report Stereo podcast. Pride

422
00:25:42,119 --> 00:25:44,240
Speaker 1: youself on not fucking the fans, and that means being

423
00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:47,320
Speaker 1: as honest as you possibly can, unless you have to

424
00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:50,320
Speaker 1: cover up a name, unless it's you know, something obvious. Okay,

425
00:25:50,440 --> 00:25:53,720
Speaker 1: So then I'm gonna ask you again, how did you

426
00:25:53,760 --> 00:25:58,600
Speaker 1: meet this Brazilian? Okay, so, if we're being totally honest,

427
00:25:59,200 --> 00:26:04,080
Speaker 1: I did see her on Tinder, and um, I think

428
00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:08,000
Speaker 1: I sent her a message on Instagram, Okay, because in

429
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:09,960
Speaker 1: her bio she had her Instagram and a lot of

430
00:26:10,000 --> 00:26:12,280
Speaker 1: girls like want you to go to their Instagram. I guess,

431
00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:16,760
Speaker 1: like I just so, I reached out to her on there,

432
00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:18,879
Speaker 1: and after a couple of hours, I have like a

433
00:26:18,960 --> 00:26:21,359
Speaker 1: rule of thumb, and and with this one it was different.

434
00:26:21,400 --> 00:26:24,080
Speaker 1: But my rule of thumb is I'll send a girl

435
00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:28,239
Speaker 1: a message on Instagram, and after twenty four hours, if

436
00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:33,040
Speaker 1: they don't respond to that message or they don't go

437
00:26:33,119 --> 00:26:35,719
Speaker 1: to my page or whatever, they don't respond, I unt

438
00:26:35,800 --> 00:26:39,040
Speaker 1: send that message. I don't like that. I don't not

439
00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:41,280
Speaker 1: a thirst, absolutely not. I'm not one of these guys.

440
00:26:41,440 --> 00:26:45,000
Speaker 1: Was like, I don't like to get reminded of my failure.

441
00:26:45,160 --> 00:26:46,680
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't like to take the d M

442
00:26:46,760 --> 00:26:49,119
Speaker 1: in there, so I un send the message. So I

443
00:26:49,160 --> 00:26:51,040
Speaker 1: think what had happened with this I think that's good.

444
00:26:51,320 --> 00:26:54,440
Speaker 1: I think that's a good approach with this girl. This

445
00:26:54,520 --> 00:26:57,560
Speaker 1: girl actually didn't send a message. Um, but what I

446
00:26:57,600 --> 00:26:59,600
Speaker 1: did was I went to her Instagram, I liked two

447
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:02,840
Speaker 1: of her photos, she liked two of my photos, and

448
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:06,280
Speaker 1: then I then I sent her a message. And okay, okay,

449
00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:08,840
Speaker 1: there we go. Because that's different what you said about

450
00:27:08,880 --> 00:27:11,280
Speaker 1: two minutes ago. Yeah, okay, it doesn't feel better. You

451
00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:13,679
Speaker 1: feel better that you're telling everybody that I'm not gonna lie.

452
00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:15,359
Speaker 1: I do feel better. I don't want to be I

453
00:27:15,400 --> 00:27:18,320
Speaker 1: don't want to be known as a liar and um,

454
00:27:18,359 --> 00:27:20,479
Speaker 1: and the fans don't think of you as one. I'm not.

455
00:27:20,680 --> 00:27:22,800
Speaker 1: I'm not one, and but that's I know, and they

456
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:24,280
Speaker 1: don't think of you as one, and we don't want

457
00:27:24,280 --> 00:27:25,800
Speaker 1: to We don't want to breach that. We don't want

458
00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:27,560
Speaker 1: to suck the fans. I I must have got to

459
00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:30,360
Speaker 1: confused with with somebody else from maybe if you call

460
00:27:30,400 --> 00:27:32,639
Speaker 1: it that, let's call it that. You must have got

461
00:27:32,680 --> 00:27:35,840
Speaker 1: it confused. Let's just leave it at that. Okay, that's fine,

462
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:37,679
Speaker 1: all right, Well, no, I must have got to confuse

463
00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:41,720
Speaker 1: and we liked each other. Sure fucking did. Okay, man,

464
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,200
Speaker 1: you just you reminded me of that. I just said,

465
00:27:44,320 --> 00:27:48,120
Speaker 1: sure fucking did, get it confused? I just said that.

466
00:27:50,680 --> 00:27:54,600
Speaker 1: Can I finish the story? Or oh I'm waiting? I can't.

467
00:27:54,640 --> 00:27:57,800
Speaker 1: I'm excited. Okay, So anyway, we like each other's stuff.

468
00:27:57,840 --> 00:28:01,720
Speaker 1: I send her a message, she replies in immediately, um,

469
00:28:01,760 --> 00:28:05,520
Speaker 1: and I gave her my number. She texts me right

470
00:28:05,560 --> 00:28:07,280
Speaker 1: after I give her my number, and she said, hey,

471
00:28:07,320 --> 00:28:10,000
Speaker 1: it's so and so. Um, I mean the first girl

472
00:28:10,080 --> 00:28:11,600
Speaker 1: that we called the City of God. I don't know.

473
00:28:12,160 --> 00:28:13,879
Speaker 1: You're great with your nicknames. I don't know what we

474
00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:16,480
Speaker 1: call this Brazilian girl, but I can't give a real

475
00:28:16,560 --> 00:28:19,040
Speaker 1: name because certain people get a little nutty and go

476
00:28:19,280 --> 00:28:23,160
Speaker 1: find these people online and trying to ruin my ship. Um,

477
00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:30,520
Speaker 1: we'll call her Rio Rio Rio like you know Rio

478
00:28:31,000 --> 00:28:34,400
Speaker 1: Likeno okay, Rio. I like Rio, So we'll call her Rio.

479
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:35,600
Speaker 1: You don't have to do the accident all the time

480
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:37,439
Speaker 1: because I realized it takes a lot of energy to do. Like,

481
00:28:37,520 --> 00:28:40,000
Speaker 1: we'll call her Rio so anyway, Rio okay. So, so

482
00:28:40,320 --> 00:28:43,160
Speaker 1: I get a text message that says, hey, it's Rio

483
00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:49,520
Speaker 1: with a little emoji. Okay, it was a moonface. It

484
00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:53,840
Speaker 1: was like, oh, hey, you know it's me Rio. I

485
00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:56,760
Speaker 1: might be a night owl. I don't know. You don't

486
00:28:56,760 --> 00:28:58,800
Speaker 1: know who I am. I'm an insomniac. I don't know

487
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:05,880
Speaker 1: what the implications were for that. Um, but anyway, she

488
00:29:05,960 --> 00:29:08,680
Speaker 1: sends me the thing. I said, Hey, I might have

489
00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:12,520
Speaker 1: sleep issues exactly, And I was I like that. I

490
00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:15,320
Speaker 1: like that's the thing. I like, I'm gonna be totally

491
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:17,040
Speaker 1: honest because you're talking about honestly, and then I'll get

492
00:29:17,040 --> 00:29:19,360
Speaker 1: into the story. But I really talking about honestly. I

493
00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:24,640
Speaker 1: like women who don't like me. I like women who

494
00:29:25,120 --> 00:29:28,520
Speaker 1: uh need therapy, who have problems. I don't like a

495
00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:30,680
Speaker 1: woman who's like I really like this guy. You seem

496
00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:33,120
Speaker 1: like such a great person. You know, how are you

497
00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:35,440
Speaker 1: still single? Like that turns me off, Like I like

498
00:29:35,520 --> 00:29:37,960
Speaker 1: someone who like treats me like shit. Um, I don't

499
00:29:37,960 --> 00:29:39,960
Speaker 1: know what that's about because my parents are still together.

500
00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:41,880
Speaker 1: I come from a very loving family. But I do

501
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:46,360
Speaker 1: like toxicity. Uh there's something about toxicity that I personally

502
00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:49,800
Speaker 1: enjoy in dating. And um I I don't say that

503
00:29:49,840 --> 00:29:52,320
Speaker 1: with pride. It's it's something that I'm working on, but

504
00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:54,760
Speaker 1: I do like it's just it's something about kind of

505
00:29:54,800 --> 00:29:57,320
Speaker 1: crazy women and it's just it's fun and you don't

506
00:29:57,360 --> 00:29:59,000
Speaker 1: know what's gonna have. One day they like you, the

507
00:29:59,040 --> 00:30:01,080
Speaker 1: next day they they don't ever want to speak to

508
00:30:01,080 --> 00:30:05,720
Speaker 1: you again. I like that. Um so this so don't

509
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:09,600
Speaker 1: we all? I apparently I I apparently? Well yeah, I

510
00:30:09,640 --> 00:30:11,040
Speaker 1: guess so. I mean I have friends that are in

511
00:30:11,120 --> 00:30:13,720
Speaker 1: loving relationships and I'm like, I don't get it, but

512
00:30:14,480 --> 00:30:17,640
Speaker 1: I got you don't get it. You're you're looking for No,

513
00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:20,400
Speaker 1: I don't get I thought i'd outgrow this phase like

514
00:30:20,520 --> 00:30:23,360
Speaker 1: by five. I'm I'm thirty one, and I'm like, when

515
00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:25,160
Speaker 1: when's this gonna be over? Like? When am I gonna

516
00:30:25,160 --> 00:30:27,000
Speaker 1: snap out and start wanting to settle down? But I

517
00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:28,840
Speaker 1: think my forties are gonna be like a real good

518
00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:31,760
Speaker 1: time for me to like start raising children. Maybe, but

519
00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:35,640
Speaker 1: until then, we don't want to say therapy. You were

520
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:38,040
Speaker 1: asking damn it. Okay, you're asked damn it. So I

521
00:30:38,040 --> 00:30:41,560
Speaker 1: get the text message, holy shit, sorry you're asking me

522
00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:44,200
Speaker 1: about it. I get the text message. I mean I

523
00:30:44,240 --> 00:30:46,560
Speaker 1: asked you, but holy shit. All right, man, well something

524
00:30:46,600 --> 00:30:48,480
Speaker 1: this is like some one of my former therapy talking

525
00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:50,840
Speaker 1: to you, like I don't have a therapist. So I

526
00:30:50,880 --> 00:30:53,360
Speaker 1: get the text message. I said, it's you know, I'm

527
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:55,840
Speaker 1: glad you texted me. She said, I'm glad you found me.

528
00:30:56,240 --> 00:30:57,880
Speaker 1: And so I we were already kind of off to

529
00:30:57,920 --> 00:30:59,960
Speaker 1: the races. I said, you know, I like to I don't.

530
00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:03,000
Speaker 1: I don't like to do interview style things where we're

531
00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:05,840
Speaker 1: talking chit chat, small talk, like I'm kind of a

532
00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:08,000
Speaker 1: short text I'm not a good texter. I'd rather see

533
00:31:08,040 --> 00:31:10,239
Speaker 1: you in person and talk and all that stuff. So

534
00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:12,440
Speaker 1: I set up a date with this girl. You ain

535
00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:15,480
Speaker 1: with all along talk. I am not not about any

536
00:31:15,520 --> 00:31:17,760
Speaker 1: of that long talking because I'm not down with the

537
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:19,920
Speaker 1: long talk. So I set up a date. I said, Hey,

538
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:23,120
Speaker 1: some of my friends, some of my girlfriends are going

539
00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:28,320
Speaker 1: to this bar called Zebulon. Okay, in Echo Park area,

540
00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:31,880
Speaker 1: which is like a really happening part of town right now.

541
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:35,000
Speaker 1: It's more popular and and fun than West Hollywood or

542
00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:37,160
Speaker 1: Santa Monica. Right now. You could get stuck up over there.

543
00:31:37,200 --> 00:31:40,320
Speaker 1: I saw a surveillance video somebody getting a gun pulled

544
00:31:40,360 --> 00:31:43,480
Speaker 1: on him again broad Daylight on Melrose. Well, that's see,

545
00:31:43,520 --> 00:31:46,400
Speaker 1: that's that's that's West Hollywood. I was going further east.

546
00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:50,200
Speaker 1: You'd think it's less safe for the East, but apparently no,

547
00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:52,880
Speaker 1: it's crazy. So anyway, I go. I tell her, Hey,

548
00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:55,080
Speaker 1: this is the plan. I'm meeting up with some girls,

549
00:31:55,520 --> 00:31:58,080
Speaker 1: um my friends at this place called Zebulon. It's this

550
00:31:58,160 --> 00:32:01,960
Speaker 1: hot bar spot, it's open area, it's inside the nineties,

551
00:32:02,000 --> 00:32:06,240
Speaker 1: two thousands of music whatever. So okay, okay, I get

552
00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:08,400
Speaker 1: an uber. I'm pretty nervous. I'm not gonna lie because

553
00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:10,160
Speaker 1: it's been it's been a while since I've started to

554
00:32:10,160 --> 00:32:12,080
Speaker 1: get into the dating pool again. I've only had like

555
00:32:12,080 --> 00:32:14,400
Speaker 1: a couple of experiences lately, and I'm trying to get

556
00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:17,720
Speaker 1: myself back out there, and I'm I'm pretty nervous. I'm

557
00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:20,120
Speaker 1: getting my stuff together, all this stuff I get an

558
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 1: uber I call an uber and this Uber driver he

559
00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:26,440
Speaker 1: starts telling me, oh, I don't know. I wasn't gonna

560
00:32:26,520 --> 00:32:28,560
Speaker 1: drop you off at this place because my ex wife

561
00:32:28,560 --> 00:32:31,760
Speaker 1: lives there in that area and and I'm a strange

562
00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:33,760
Speaker 1: from her and I have my she's got a restraining

563
00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:36,160
Speaker 1: order against me. And I'm in the back I'm in

564
00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:38,719
Speaker 1: the back seat of my car, like one shot in

565
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:40,480
Speaker 1: before I left to loosen up. And so I'm thinking,

566
00:32:40,480 --> 00:32:42,520
Speaker 1: all right, may I'll practice my social skills right now

567
00:32:42,520 --> 00:32:44,720
Speaker 1: by talking to this guy. So I start talking to

568
00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:49,040
Speaker 1: the guy and he starts giving me the whole life

569
00:32:49,040 --> 00:32:52,400
Speaker 1: story of how he cheated on his ex wife and

570
00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:54,800
Speaker 1: he doesn't have custody of his daughter. And I'm just saying, hey, man,

571
00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:57,160
Speaker 1: like it'll make you stronger in the end. You got this,

572
00:32:57,640 --> 00:32:59,400
Speaker 1: you know you're gonna move on and be okay. And

573
00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:01,320
Speaker 1: I'm just I'm is nice. I'm a nice guy. And

574
00:33:01,640 --> 00:33:03,360
Speaker 1: he took advantage of me with that. And so as

575
00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:05,920
Speaker 1: we got closer to the bar and my destination, he

576
00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:09,560
Speaker 1: starts taking me on a tour of where his ex

577
00:33:09,600 --> 00:33:12,400
Speaker 1: wife lives and he goes, that's that's her, that's her

578
00:33:12,480 --> 00:33:14,720
Speaker 1: uncle's car. You see that I like this fucking guy.

579
00:33:14,760 --> 00:33:16,920
Speaker 1: He's telling me this is my this is my in

580
00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:20,520
Speaker 1: laws car right there. Oh they're still there, and I'm like, oh, fun,

581
00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:22,120
Speaker 1: get me at. I was like, I was just trying

582
00:33:22,120 --> 00:33:23,640
Speaker 1: to be nice. I gave him a fucking inch. He

583
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:26,720
Speaker 1: took a mile from me. I felt taken advantage of.

584
00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:29,320
Speaker 1: And so then I gotta be honest. I gotta be honest.

585
00:33:29,720 --> 00:33:34,080
Speaker 1: That guy is a sociopath. Um number one number two,

586
00:33:34,160 --> 00:33:36,880
Speaker 1: I understand. I've been in that place. Looked me up.

587
00:33:36,920 --> 00:33:42,800
Speaker 1: Google me, Michael rap Google me number two number two.

588
00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:45,440
Speaker 1: I had an incident today with an Uber driver in

589
00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:49,080
Speaker 1: New York. I wasn't driving my car, and before I

590
00:33:49,120 --> 00:33:52,400
Speaker 1: even got in the car, the motherfucker was screaming at

591
00:33:52,440 --> 00:33:54,880
Speaker 1: me because he had an automatic door. How am I

592
00:33:55,160 --> 00:33:58,480
Speaker 1: postes an automatic door? You like to really get aggressive

593
00:33:58,480 --> 00:34:00,600
Speaker 1: and start like opening I want to open the fucking door.

594
00:34:00,680 --> 00:34:03,040
Speaker 1: I want to get in the car. How are you

595
00:34:03,120 --> 00:34:06,040
Speaker 1: siding with him? Just off the because I stay because

596
00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:09,759
Speaker 1: I know your Uber score and it's absolute dogship. And

597
00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:13,000
Speaker 1: I started to wonder, why is your Uber score so low?

598
00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:16,000
Speaker 1: I was just wondering why, and then I realized were

599
00:34:16,040 --> 00:34:18,440
Speaker 1: traveling with you? You get in the car and it's

600
00:34:18,440 --> 00:34:21,279
Speaker 1: like a reflex. Immediately you get an Uber driver's car

601
00:34:21,320 --> 00:34:23,120
Speaker 1: and it's never just like you sit down, you were lexed.

602
00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:25,400
Speaker 1: You say something right off the back, My man, I

603
00:34:25,440 --> 00:34:28,120
Speaker 1: need you to move the seat up, yo, the windows

604
00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:30,000
Speaker 1: are locked. I need you know where's the air conditioning.

605
00:34:30,120 --> 00:34:31,600
Speaker 1: It's like a reflex. And I don't even think that

606
00:34:31,640 --> 00:34:34,600
Speaker 1: you necessarily want the seat up or that you need it.

607
00:34:35,719 --> 00:34:37,719
Speaker 1: It's it's like, I don't know why if you're driving

608
00:34:37,719 --> 00:34:40,719
Speaker 1: an Uber and it's one passenger or two passengers, why

609
00:34:40,840 --> 00:34:45,520
Speaker 1: you're passenger Your front passenger seat is like reclined, like

610
00:34:45,640 --> 00:34:48,239
Speaker 1: you have like fucking Cheech and Chong in the front row,

611
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:51,360
Speaker 1: like it should be up. And also, I'm you're not

612
00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:54,239
Speaker 1: picking up anybody under eighteen, under twenty one under the

613
00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:57,080
Speaker 1: child protection on the windows, like I wanna because you

614
00:34:57,160 --> 00:34:59,000
Speaker 1: go in there. I went into it was like a

615
00:34:59,080 --> 00:35:01,959
Speaker 1: perfume to spend street. After I said, my wife's gonna

616
00:35:01,960 --> 00:35:04,640
Speaker 1: think I was in a worehouse, right, but it literally

617
00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:06,120
Speaker 1: smelled like I was in a horse I was like,

618
00:35:06,480 --> 00:35:09,319
Speaker 1: she's gonna think I was. I was literally in a

619
00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:11,880
Speaker 1: fucking Brazilian horhouse. That's what it's smell like it was

620
00:35:11,960 --> 00:35:18,640
Speaker 1: so putant. Putant? Is that the word putant? I went

621
00:35:18,680 --> 00:35:20,879
Speaker 1: to film with this man. You're not asking the guy

622
00:35:20,960 --> 00:35:22,800
Speaker 1: what is it? Putant? I thought pungent? Maybe it was

623
00:35:22,840 --> 00:35:26,080
Speaker 1: like a pun smell anyway, And and then when I

624
00:35:26,160 --> 00:35:29,480
Speaker 1: you know, he's the door. I'm not doing the accent

625
00:35:29,600 --> 00:35:31,319
Speaker 1: he had, like some kind of African accent. I'm doing

626
00:35:31,320 --> 00:35:33,239
Speaker 1: Middle Eastern. Was like, dude, the door, I I don't

627
00:35:33,239 --> 00:35:36,120
Speaker 1: know the fucking door. I don't know. It's automatic, man,

628
00:35:36,440 --> 00:35:39,120
Speaker 1: I think that you And then and then when I

629
00:35:39,160 --> 00:35:42,800
Speaker 1: get in there, it's the pugeon smell. Paying the window

630
00:35:42,840 --> 00:35:47,040
Speaker 1: won't go down, pungent Like it's like, I'm fifty one.

631
00:35:47,160 --> 00:35:48,960
Speaker 1: Why do I have to ask? Hey, dad, can you

632
00:35:49,040 --> 00:35:52,320
Speaker 1: can you? Can you roll down the wind? The dude

633
00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:54,799
Speaker 1: and they have your life in their hands, paying and

634
00:35:54,840 --> 00:35:57,600
Speaker 1: the prices are so expensive New York. You know what

635
00:35:57,600 --> 00:35:59,680
Speaker 1: you're gonna start seeing of me, videos of me on

636
00:35:59,719 --> 00:36:04,319
Speaker 1: the TRAI you're on it, You're and you know what

637
00:36:04,360 --> 00:36:06,560
Speaker 1: I was with you and some guy, this poor guy,

638
00:36:06,560 --> 00:36:08,000
Speaker 1: And I'm just gonna put you on blast right here

639
00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:10,600
Speaker 1: on your own podcast. This poor guy. He's not saying

640
00:36:10,600 --> 00:36:12,040
Speaker 1: a word to us in the car, and you, I

641
00:36:12,040 --> 00:36:13,480
Speaker 1: know you don't like people talking to you and all

642
00:36:13,480 --> 00:36:15,680
Speaker 1: that ship. This guy's listening to his music and he's

643
00:36:15,800 --> 00:36:17,600
Speaker 1: he's bopping his head listen to his music. He said,

644
00:36:17,640 --> 00:36:19,560
Speaker 1: my man, I need you to turn that down. I

645
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:21,520
Speaker 1: need you to turn that music down. It's like some

646
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:24,480
Speaker 1: it's like some billy. He's like vibing, it's like I'm

647
00:36:24,520 --> 00:36:26,960
Speaker 1: walking on sunshine. He was like, how loud was it?

648
00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:29,799
Speaker 1: You were in there? It was so But you know what,

649
00:36:29,840 --> 00:36:31,239
Speaker 1: I'm not going to tell him to turn down his

650
00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:33,719
Speaker 1: music unless I have a throbbing headache. And you know what,

651
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:36,200
Speaker 1: at that point, I am not a hit shiker, Okay,

652
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:38,480
Speaker 1: I am a paid customer. So you're like, it's his car.

653
00:36:38,520 --> 00:36:39,680
Speaker 1: It's not like I was on the side of the

654
00:36:39,760 --> 00:36:42,880
Speaker 1: road showing my legs trying to get a ride, you know,

655
00:36:43,200 --> 00:36:46,640
Speaker 1: on the hot sun desert roads of Arizona. I'm paying

656
00:36:46,680 --> 00:36:48,839
Speaker 1: for service. That's why when they say do you want

657
00:36:48,880 --> 00:36:51,319
Speaker 1: to talk? Do you like there should be more that

658
00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:54,520
Speaker 1: talk that I want the seat up, turn your fucking

659
00:36:54,600 --> 00:36:57,600
Speaker 1: music down to a normal a normal volume if you

660
00:36:57,640 --> 00:36:59,560
Speaker 1: if you should even And also when I come in there,

661
00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:01,919
Speaker 1: why don't you say, oh, would you like to listen

662
00:37:01,960 --> 00:37:03,359
Speaker 1: to something I don't. I don't want to hear I'm

663
00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:08,319
Speaker 1: walking on sunshine. That this four guys listening I'm walking

664
00:37:08,320 --> 00:37:10,560
Speaker 1: on such and you you kind of snap, you weren't

665
00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:12,719
Speaker 1: in the best mood, and you said, I need you

666
00:37:12,760 --> 00:37:16,399
Speaker 1: to turn it down. Can you please turn down the music?

667
00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:19,120
Speaker 1: Turn the music down? And this poor guy, because I

668
00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:21,799
Speaker 1: could see his face in the mirror up front there

669
00:37:22,160 --> 00:37:24,839
Speaker 1: and his face the look of defeat that he had.

670
00:37:24,920 --> 00:37:28,360
Speaker 1: And not only did he turn the music down, he

671
00:37:28,520 --> 00:37:31,840
Speaker 1: turned the music off. And you said, my man, you

672
00:37:31,880 --> 00:37:33,200
Speaker 1: don't know if you said, oh, no, yeah, then you

673
00:37:33,200 --> 00:37:34,719
Speaker 1: got all sweet music. Oh you don't have to turn

674
00:37:34,760 --> 00:37:36,920
Speaker 1: the music off. I just wanted to because I didn't.

675
00:37:36,960 --> 00:37:39,600
Speaker 1: It didn't have to be off. But enough, we're not

676
00:37:39,640 --> 00:37:41,920
Speaker 1: going to the club. It's eleven in the morning. It

677
00:37:42,000 --> 00:37:44,600
Speaker 1: was eleven in the morning. And he said no, he said, no,

678
00:37:44,680 --> 00:37:46,799
Speaker 1: it's fine, I'll turn it off. And you know, so

679
00:37:46,880 --> 00:37:49,640
Speaker 1: now now now you're you're playing games. You want keep

680
00:37:49,760 --> 00:37:51,520
Speaker 1: I'll keep playing games. You want to keep throwing me

681
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:53,359
Speaker 1: under the bus. All I got plenty more stories where

682
00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:56,640
Speaker 1: that came from. Okay, so I I was being nice.

683
00:37:56,920 --> 00:37:59,800
Speaker 1: I was being nice to the uber driver. I didn't

684
00:37:59,800 --> 00:38:01,000
Speaker 1: read lies that he was going to give me the

685
00:38:01,000 --> 00:38:04,680
Speaker 1: grand tour of his ex wife's house, um in Echo Park,

686
00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:07,040
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, man, just get me there. And

687
00:38:07,040 --> 00:38:09,520
Speaker 1: then all of a sudden he says, oh my god.

688
00:38:09,960 --> 00:38:11,680
Speaker 1: He says, well, he says, what are you doing here?

689
00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:13,080
Speaker 1: By the way, what's up with you? What are you?

690
00:38:13,120 --> 00:38:14,520
Speaker 1: Where are you going? Where am I dropping you off?

691
00:38:14,520 --> 00:38:16,600
Speaker 1: I said, I'm meeting this Brazilian goal and he goes,

692
00:38:16,719 --> 00:38:18,879
Speaker 1: oh my god. I wouldn't have told him that. Well,

693
00:38:18,920 --> 00:38:20,560
Speaker 1: I told him then that's all I said. And I said,

694
00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:22,600
Speaker 1: I've never met her. I'm meeting her. I'm a little nervous.

695
00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:25,279
Speaker 1: And then he stopped the car and he said, oh

696
00:38:25,360 --> 00:38:29,520
Speaker 1: my god, this is strange. But I'm a messenger from God,

697
00:38:30,440 --> 00:38:35,360
Speaker 1: and I'm a prophet of God, and there's something that

698
00:38:35,600 --> 00:38:37,440
Speaker 1: is telling me that you're gonna have this girl is

699
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:39,560
Speaker 1: going to change your life. And this is going to

700
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:43,680
Speaker 1: be life changing night for you. Your anxiety, your thoughts,

701
00:38:43,719 --> 00:38:45,600
Speaker 1: your worries are all going to go out the window.

702
00:38:45,920 --> 00:38:49,319
Speaker 1: You're gonna have conversation flowing like no other. You're not

703
00:38:49,320 --> 00:38:51,040
Speaker 1: gonna be worried about it. I didn't tell him I

704
00:38:51,080 --> 00:38:53,080
Speaker 1: was worried or anxious about this. By the way, so

705
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:57,960
Speaker 1: this was this is a weird he's a he's avoiding

706
00:38:58,000 --> 00:39:00,839
Speaker 1: God or maybe a lunatic. I don't know, but he

707
00:39:01,239 --> 00:39:03,680
Speaker 1: he's a nuts. He had this feeling. He said, I

708
00:39:03,680 --> 00:39:05,560
Speaker 1: was supposed to drive you. You were supposed to be

709
00:39:05,600 --> 00:39:07,760
Speaker 1: here to help me as whatever. Man, there's my stop.

710
00:39:07,880 --> 00:39:10,040
Speaker 1: I got out of the car. That was over with.

711
00:39:10,120 --> 00:39:12,680
Speaker 1: Thank goodness. I meet up with my girlfriends. They're like,

712
00:39:13,080 --> 00:39:15,000
Speaker 1: this is gonna be a great night. We're gonna go out.

713
00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:17,440
Speaker 1: So I t I text the girl, and my move is,

714
00:39:18,200 --> 00:39:21,200
Speaker 1: I'm gonna send you an uber. Uh. That way, you

715
00:39:21,239 --> 00:39:23,000
Speaker 1: don't have to worry about getting an uber. You don't

716
00:39:23,000 --> 00:39:25,520
Speaker 1: have to worry about driving and drinking and all that bullshit.

717
00:39:25,600 --> 00:39:28,879
Speaker 1: I'm a nice guy, I'm a stand up guy. I said, hey,

718
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:30,799
Speaker 1: whenever you're ready. I just got to the bar because

719
00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:32,160
Speaker 1: I wanted her to meet me there. I'm gonna send

720
00:39:32,200 --> 00:39:34,440
Speaker 1: you an uber to your address because she's a visitor

721
00:39:34,480 --> 00:39:37,960
Speaker 1: in town. She's from New York, Brazil, living in New York,

722
00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:40,960
Speaker 1: who's in in Los Angeles vacationing. So I said, let

723
00:39:40,960 --> 00:39:42,120
Speaker 1: me send you an uber and she said, okay, that

724
00:39:42,120 --> 00:39:44,840
Speaker 1: would be great. I'll text you when I'm ready. The

725
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:46,799
Speaker 1: night's going on a little bit. My girlfriends are kind

726
00:39:46,800 --> 00:39:48,120
Speaker 1: of giving me a hard time and they go and listen,

727
00:39:48,120 --> 00:39:50,319
Speaker 1: this girl's not coming, Like, you know, this girl's hot,

728
00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:53,560
Speaker 1: she's there's nothing against you, but she's not coming. It's

729
00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:56,440
Speaker 1: it's so it's approaching eleven o'clock and I'm like, no, no, no,

730
00:39:56,440 --> 00:39:58,319
Speaker 1: no no. I was like, don't say that, don't put

731
00:39:58,320 --> 00:39:59,640
Speaker 1: that in the air. I had a bad experience with

732
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:03,239
Speaker 1: the last Brazilian. All of a sudden I get and yeah,

733
00:40:03,239 --> 00:40:05,359
Speaker 1: but this girl is like, I'm so excited to meet you.

734
00:40:05,520 --> 00:40:07,839
Speaker 1: I can't wait, and I'm getting a good vibe. So

735
00:40:07,920 --> 00:40:09,480
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, I get a text message, Hey,

736
00:40:09,520 --> 00:40:11,719
Speaker 1: I'm ready. You have an only fans account? Does not

737
00:40:11,760 --> 00:40:14,800
Speaker 1: have an only fans account. I was happy about the

738
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:18,719
Speaker 1: first not yeah, you should be happy about that. I should. Well,

739
00:40:18,719 --> 00:40:20,239
Speaker 1: I know it's like today you gotta be like, what's

740
00:40:20,239 --> 00:40:21,719
Speaker 1: wrong with that? You should have a girlfriend with an

741
00:40:21,719 --> 00:40:24,239
Speaker 1: only fans and nothing that. Nothing's wrong with that. It's

742
00:40:24,320 --> 00:40:26,640
Speaker 1: just saying. Next thing, you know, you're fucking cats in

743
00:40:26,680 --> 00:40:31,360
Speaker 1: a gas station, you know, somewhere, like you know, just anyway,

744
00:40:31,400 --> 00:40:33,400
Speaker 1: go ahead, all right. So anyway, she says, I'm ready

745
00:40:33,400 --> 00:40:34,839
Speaker 1: to come here. I'm ready to go to the bar.

746
00:40:35,280 --> 00:40:37,440
Speaker 1: You can send the uber is a fantastic this is

747
00:40:37,480 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 1: really happening now, Oh my god, Okay, like this is

748
00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:42,000
Speaker 1: really going to go down. This Brazilian is not gonna

749
00:40:42,040 --> 00:40:44,680
Speaker 1: stand me up. She gets in an uber and and

750
00:40:45,520 --> 00:40:48,200
Speaker 1: I can see, you know, she's driving towards me. Whatever,

751
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:50,919
Speaker 1: she's about to be there. It's a great bar. All

752
00:40:50,920 --> 00:40:52,719
Speaker 1: my friends and I are like we were a couple

753
00:40:52,719 --> 00:40:54,839
Speaker 1: of shots in. Now she gets there, she says, hey,

754
00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:57,799
Speaker 1: there's a huge line out the door. I don't know

755
00:40:57,840 --> 00:40:59,520
Speaker 1: what to do. I don't think I'm gonna be able

756
00:40:59,560 --> 00:41:02,359
Speaker 1: to come in. I'm like, fuck, like this is not

757
00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:03,839
Speaker 1: going to be the end of the night. So I

758
00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:05,880
Speaker 1: go to the door guy. I go to one of

759
00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:07,640
Speaker 1: the security guard and say, hey, my friends in the line,

760
00:41:07,640 --> 00:41:09,279
Speaker 1: what should I do? They go go to the door

761
00:41:09,280 --> 00:41:11,480
Speaker 1: guy and offer him a bunch of money to get

762
00:41:11,480 --> 00:41:13,800
Speaker 1: her to cut the line and go meet. Not a bunch,

763
00:41:13,840 --> 00:41:16,520
Speaker 1: but just offer him some money, venmo him or whatever

764
00:41:16,520 --> 00:41:17,719
Speaker 1: the funk it is. So I'm going to have a

765
00:41:17,760 --> 00:41:20,520
Speaker 1: funk all right, whatever I'm I'm already like it is

766
00:41:20,560 --> 00:41:22,800
Speaker 1: now it's listen. If you want to get a drink

767
00:41:22,880 --> 00:41:25,480
Speaker 1: and go uber to a bar, be prepared to spend

768
00:41:25,480 --> 00:41:28,399
Speaker 1: a hundred dollars on that. I just spent seventy eight

769
00:41:28,440 --> 00:41:31,840
Speaker 1: dollars coming from Houston Street to my apartment in a

770
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:34,399
Speaker 1: fucking uber that smelled like a like a whorehouse. Well,

771
00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:37,040
Speaker 1: I know you know what it is. So that's it's

772
00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:39,399
Speaker 1: it's hard out here. And I got screened that by

773
00:41:39,400 --> 00:41:42,000
Speaker 1: this guy. Well you deserve that, I'm sure, but no

774
00:41:42,080 --> 00:41:44,400
Speaker 1: I didn't. Okay, I didn't. All right, man, save it

775
00:41:44,400 --> 00:41:46,279
Speaker 1: for your fucking therapists already told you to say, now

776
00:41:46,320 --> 00:41:49,480
Speaker 1: the therapy session. So she's here. I go to the door. Guy.

777
00:41:49,600 --> 00:41:52,240
Speaker 1: There's a line down the block. It's a popular place.

778
00:41:52,400 --> 00:41:54,840
Speaker 1: And I said, hey, man, this girl that I'm meeting,

779
00:41:55,120 --> 00:41:56,759
Speaker 1: she's at the back of the line. Is there any

780
00:41:56,760 --> 00:42:00,759
Speaker 1: way you've told us that? Yeah, you gotta now I'm

781
00:42:00,800 --> 00:42:02,719
Speaker 1: telling him. So, I said, you had like a brain

782
00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:04,560
Speaker 1: spin there, No, no, no, So I said, this is

783
00:42:04,560 --> 00:42:07,279
Speaker 1: this There is this huge line. Can I venmo you

784
00:42:07,480 --> 00:42:08,920
Speaker 1: to bring her to the front of the line and

785
00:42:08,960 --> 00:42:11,279
Speaker 1: meet me? And I'm expecting nope, fuck you and the

786
00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:13,960
Speaker 1: guy and this is where the uber driver comes in

787
00:42:14,320 --> 00:42:17,000
Speaker 1: like maybe he was right about this prophecy ship. Because

788
00:42:17,000 --> 00:42:19,040
Speaker 1: the guy goes, hey, man, you don't have to pay

789
00:42:19,080 --> 00:42:20,919
Speaker 1: me anything. Bring her up to the front of the line.

790
00:42:20,960 --> 00:42:22,799
Speaker 1: She can come in with you. And I'm like, oh

791
00:42:22,840 --> 00:42:25,440
Speaker 1: my god, fuck yeah. So I bring her up. I

792
00:42:25,560 --> 00:42:28,239
Speaker 1: meet her. Night's going good. Night is going really well

793
00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:31,080
Speaker 1: so far. Now when you meet her, is she does

794
00:42:31,120 --> 00:42:35,839
Speaker 1: she look like the pictures in size scope filter? Does

795
00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:39,239
Speaker 1: she smell normal? She smells great, She looks great, she's exotic.

796
00:42:39,560 --> 00:42:43,080
Speaker 1: She she has high heels on. You know, I'm I'm

797
00:42:43,120 --> 00:42:46,000
Speaker 1: five eight, five eight and a half, still growing um

798
00:42:46,360 --> 00:42:48,440
Speaker 1: and she's got high heels on. So you know, I

799
00:42:48,480 --> 00:42:49,920
Speaker 1: can deal with that. I can work with that. But

800
00:42:50,960 --> 00:42:53,640
Speaker 1: she was tall, but in reality she's like five three.

801
00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:56,160
Speaker 1: I guess so we I I text, I said before

802
00:42:56,200 --> 00:42:57,480
Speaker 1: she got there, what do you want to drink? I'm

803
00:42:57,480 --> 00:42:59,600
Speaker 1: gonna have a drink ready for you. I like, whiskey. Okay,

804
00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:03,000
Speaker 1: So I take go to the bar that brown We're talking, talking,

805
00:43:03,040 --> 00:43:09,560
Speaker 1: talking like it's flowing. No anxious feelings, no weirdness, no awkwardness. No,

806
00:43:09,760 --> 00:43:11,680
Speaker 1: oh I just met you. I don't know what to say.

807
00:43:11,840 --> 00:43:14,360
Speaker 1: You know, she can she's got she spoke pretty good English.

808
00:43:14,400 --> 00:43:16,680
Speaker 1: So I get her a mescal mixed drink. I get

809
00:43:16,680 --> 00:43:19,879
Speaker 1: myself a mesical mixed drink and a beer and for

810
00:43:19,960 --> 00:43:23,479
Speaker 1: three hours we're talking, talking, talking, talking, talking, talking about

811
00:43:23,480 --> 00:43:27,279
Speaker 1: each other everything. It's going really well, so well that

812
00:43:27,360 --> 00:43:31,360
Speaker 1: she doesn't she hasn't even had a quarter of her drink. Okay,

813
00:43:31,480 --> 00:43:34,160
Speaker 1: she hasn't even drank before that. She got to the place,

814
00:43:34,719 --> 00:43:38,640
Speaker 1: and she even says, hey, you know, this is so amazing,

815
00:43:38,760 --> 00:43:41,840
Speaker 1: like you're so easy to talk to. There's you know,

816
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:43,360
Speaker 1: I was kind of nervous that this was going to

817
00:43:43,440 --> 00:43:45,319
Speaker 1: be awkward or whatever it is, and I'm just having

818
00:43:45,360 --> 00:43:47,920
Speaker 1: the best time, and um, I was like, great, this

819
00:43:47,960 --> 00:43:50,720
Speaker 1: is amazing. So I needed to capitalize on the moment.

820
00:43:50,800 --> 00:43:52,799
Speaker 1: And I know that she's leaving, you know, in a

821
00:43:52,840 --> 00:43:54,719
Speaker 1: few days whatever it is. So I said, you know,

822
00:43:54,880 --> 00:43:57,520
Speaker 1: we could either go back to Pasadena where you're staying,

823
00:43:57,600 --> 00:43:59,360
Speaker 1: or we could go to my spot, you know in

824
00:43:59,400 --> 00:44:02,120
Speaker 1: West hollywoo It. And she wants to come over, so

825
00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:04,520
Speaker 1: I get an uber we go back to my house.

826
00:44:04,840 --> 00:44:07,839
Speaker 1: You know. She by the way, like you said, she

827
00:44:08,000 --> 00:44:11,120
Speaker 1: loves the cat. She's like really tripping over the cat.

828
00:44:11,200 --> 00:44:15,480
Speaker 1: And Pablo careful, I understand, and so things things went,

829
00:44:15,880 --> 00:44:19,920
Speaker 1: Things went really really well. We had a great night. Um,

830
00:44:19,960 --> 00:44:22,440
Speaker 1: you know, we hooked up that night. It was a success.

831
00:44:22,600 --> 00:44:25,359
Speaker 1: What does that mean? You know what it means? I mean,

832
00:44:25,600 --> 00:44:28,520
Speaker 1: what does that mean? That mean? Because it was back

833
00:44:28,520 --> 00:44:30,560
Speaker 1: in the days, Yeah, I know, hook up. It was

834
00:44:30,600 --> 00:44:32,799
Speaker 1: like we're meeting each other or something. Yeah, that's why

835
00:44:33,280 --> 00:44:34,719
Speaker 1: that mean, That's why, that's why it makes me a

836
00:44:34,719 --> 00:44:37,600
Speaker 1: comfort because sometimes my dad will be like, hey, did

837
00:44:37,640 --> 00:44:39,960
Speaker 1: you hook up with your sister? Later, I'm like, don't

838
00:44:40,080 --> 00:44:42,040
Speaker 1: don't phrase it like that because he thinks it's like

839
00:44:42,719 --> 00:44:44,719
Speaker 1: you're you're meeting up with each other. So you freaked off.

840
00:44:44,840 --> 00:44:48,120
Speaker 1: I freaked off. We freaked off. We had a great time. Um,

841
00:44:48,680 --> 00:44:51,920
Speaker 1: space lamp, the spacelight was on, I had some nice music.

842
00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:54,839
Speaker 1: We we had some nice drinks in my house, and

843
00:44:54,920 --> 00:44:57,480
Speaker 1: she was she was really into it. And and the

844
00:44:57,600 --> 00:45:00,080
Speaker 1: next day I ended up driving her to Pascity. Know

845
00:45:00,120 --> 00:45:02,040
Speaker 1: it was like almost a forty minute drive, and I

846
00:45:02,080 --> 00:45:05,440
Speaker 1: helped check her into her new hotel and check her

847
00:45:05,440 --> 00:45:07,400
Speaker 1: out of the other hotel. I was carrying her bags.

848
00:45:07,440 --> 00:45:09,120
Speaker 1: It was like it was like I was like a

849
00:45:09,160 --> 00:45:11,919
Speaker 1: boyfriend for twenty four hours. Or something like that. And

850
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:15,319
Speaker 1: but then that's a good little twenty four hour boyfriend. Yeah,

851
00:45:15,480 --> 00:45:17,640
Speaker 1: twenty four hour boyfriend. And then the next night or

852
00:45:17,640 --> 00:45:20,040
Speaker 1: two nights later, I ended up going back to see

853
00:45:20,080 --> 00:45:22,279
Speaker 1: her and driving over her hotel and we had a

854
00:45:22,360 --> 00:45:25,520
Speaker 1: nice time. And the hotel that you checked her into, yes,

855
00:45:25,600 --> 00:45:27,839
Speaker 1: she was in the same one. Yes, And so I

856
00:45:27,880 --> 00:45:29,680
Speaker 1: and as if you told me she moved another one

857
00:45:29,680 --> 00:45:31,200
Speaker 1: that I would be no, no, no, no no the red

858
00:45:31,239 --> 00:45:33,920
Speaker 1: flag again. No, no, no, she so she know she's

859
00:45:34,320 --> 00:45:36,200
Speaker 1: did she mention why she needed to move in the

860
00:45:36,239 --> 00:45:40,080
Speaker 1: first place. She had to because her co workers, you know,

861
00:45:40,160 --> 00:45:42,120
Speaker 1: she does travel and all this stuff, they needed to

862
00:45:42,160 --> 00:45:44,160
Speaker 1: leave and she couldn't afford on her own. Blah blah

863
00:45:44,160 --> 00:45:46,879
Speaker 1: blah blah blah. So you've seen her twice. I've seen

864
00:45:46,920 --> 00:45:49,839
Speaker 1: her twice, and I've already had to have the conversation

865
00:45:49,920 --> 00:45:52,120
Speaker 1: because I'm having a lot of text messages come in

866
00:45:52,360 --> 00:45:54,120
Speaker 1: where it's sort of getting to be a little bit

867
00:45:54,160 --> 00:45:57,560
Speaker 1: of a stage five clinger, not necessarily, but just like,

868
00:45:57,960 --> 00:46:01,360
Speaker 1: why are you single? I really want to clone you.

869
00:46:01,480 --> 00:46:06,480
Speaker 1: So everybody asks why you're single, know that you're fucking nuts.

870
00:46:07,080 --> 00:46:10,319
Speaker 1: They don't write, and so they don't know you're fucking nuts,

871
00:46:10,320 --> 00:46:12,359
Speaker 1: but I mean most people would be like, this guy's great,

872
00:46:12,400 --> 00:46:14,680
Speaker 1: he's sweet, he's nice. No I am, and I am

873
00:46:14,719 --> 00:46:18,279
Speaker 1: sweete nice. I'm just like yeah whatever. So anyway, I

874
00:46:18,360 --> 00:46:20,279
Speaker 1: kind of had to have a conversation like, you know,

875
00:46:21,040 --> 00:46:23,439
Speaker 1: I'm not really looking for anything too serious right now,

876
00:46:23,480 --> 00:46:25,800
Speaker 1: and YadA, YadA, YadA, like you had to be upfront

877
00:46:25,840 --> 00:46:27,960
Speaker 1: with your intentions. But I think that she's great, and

878
00:46:28,280 --> 00:46:30,359
Speaker 1: she was like, that's fine. I really want to see

879
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:31,960
Speaker 1: you before I leave. I want to see you as

880
00:46:32,040 --> 00:46:34,640
Speaker 1: much as I can before I leave. And so everything

881
00:46:34,680 --> 00:46:36,279
Speaker 1: has been going well and she leaves in a couple

882
00:46:36,320 --> 00:46:40,560
Speaker 1: of days and it's a really easy, fun experience that

883
00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:44,640
Speaker 1: I'm having, and it that the Uber driver really was right.

884
00:46:44,840 --> 00:46:47,080
Speaker 1: I mean he was right about the conversation flowing, and

885
00:46:47,080 --> 00:46:48,960
Speaker 1: it was you know, she didn't change my life, but

886
00:46:49,640 --> 00:46:52,400
Speaker 1: things have been really great, and so I wanted to

887
00:46:52,400 --> 00:46:56,080
Speaker 1: show you Mr. Brazil. Yeah. Man, I mean they told

888
00:46:56,080 --> 00:46:57,520
Speaker 1: me to go. They you know, they used to say

889
00:46:57,520 --> 00:46:58,840
Speaker 1: when I was on the TV show with You and

890
00:46:58,880 --> 00:47:00,399
Speaker 1: all that, they'd say, come to Brazil, it will come

891
00:47:00,400 --> 00:47:02,520
Speaker 1: to Brazil. A lot of Brazilian girls say come to Brazil,

892
00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:06,520
Speaker 1: and I really like I'm capitalizing on it now. You

893
00:47:06,560 --> 00:47:08,840
Speaker 1: know I'm not in Brazil, but like maybe you know

894
00:47:08,880 --> 00:47:10,400
Speaker 1: they're coming to me right now. And I don't know

895
00:47:10,440 --> 00:47:12,320
Speaker 1: what it is. I just I love the broken English.

896
00:47:12,400 --> 00:47:14,320
Speaker 1: I love the what did you have in your mind

897
00:47:14,520 --> 00:47:16,399
Speaker 1: for tonight? I mean, I just I love that kind

898
00:47:16,400 --> 00:47:19,160
Speaker 1: of like I love that and um, you know, and

899
00:47:19,200 --> 00:47:21,040
Speaker 1: she and the one thing that she kept telling me,

900
00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:24,240
Speaker 1: which is makes me laugh because this is so crazy

901
00:47:24,239 --> 00:47:26,680
Speaker 1: to me, but she keeps saying, you're just so smart.

902
00:47:26,880 --> 00:47:29,440
Speaker 1: I think you're the smartest guy. I feel dumb around you,

903
00:47:29,480 --> 00:47:32,400
Speaker 1: and I'm like, red flag, my man, how is that?

904
00:47:32,719 --> 00:47:34,400
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you. I'm gonna tell you straight up,

905
00:47:34,400 --> 00:47:36,520
Speaker 1: you ain't you Ain't that smart? Why I'm laughing? And

906
00:47:36,800 --> 00:47:39,600
Speaker 1: that's she's buttering you the funk up? No, buttering you

907
00:47:39,680 --> 00:47:41,560
Speaker 1: up to steal your cat. No. And you know what,

908
00:47:41,640 --> 00:47:43,960
Speaker 1: she actually took a photo of Pablo and she sent

909
00:47:44,040 --> 00:47:45,359
Speaker 1: it to me the other night and she said, I

910
00:47:45,400 --> 00:47:49,240
Speaker 1: really miss seeing Pablo and you I hate you sound

911
00:47:49,280 --> 00:47:52,400
Speaker 1: really satisfied and happy with this and what you're telling

912
00:47:52,400 --> 00:47:57,040
Speaker 1: me right now, you're making me nervous. Why because she's

913
00:47:57,560 --> 00:48:00,799
Speaker 1: she photographed your cat. She's got finger prints on your

914
00:48:00,800 --> 00:48:03,640
Speaker 1: cat like she's got so so that's that same picture

915
00:48:03,680 --> 00:48:06,320
Speaker 1: one day. You better hope that that fucking picture is

916
00:48:06,360 --> 00:48:10,120
Speaker 1: not like I got your cat. I don't want that

917
00:48:10,160 --> 00:48:11,560
Speaker 1: to happen because I don't want you to call him

918
00:48:11,600 --> 00:48:14,919
Speaker 1: your wrap. Yo, know what do I do? Don't say

919
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:17,919
Speaker 1: that what I said, Colt Denzel Washington. Don't you say

920
00:48:17,920 --> 00:48:21,080
Speaker 1: that whole fucking man on fire because and I didn't

921
00:48:21,120 --> 00:48:23,200
Speaker 1: know that, you know, and before I brought up your

922
00:48:23,200 --> 00:48:25,279
Speaker 1: cat and getting your cat kidnapped, I didn't know that

923
00:48:25,320 --> 00:48:27,799
Speaker 1: she was obsessed with That was weird. I know. That's

924
00:48:27,800 --> 00:48:29,640
Speaker 1: why I was like, oh, Ship, you really said that.

925
00:48:29,640 --> 00:48:31,799
Speaker 1: That's crazy. But she did say I miss you and

926
00:48:31,840 --> 00:48:35,359
Speaker 1: I miss your cat a lot. And so anyway, it's

927
00:48:35,360 --> 00:48:37,560
Speaker 1: been a success. It's been about a week and you know,

928
00:48:37,719 --> 00:48:39,879
Speaker 1: she's she's leaving in a couple of days, and it's

929
00:48:39,960 --> 00:48:43,520
Speaker 1: just something fun and spontaneous and something I didn't expect

930
00:48:43,600 --> 00:48:45,839
Speaker 1: and and you know, to be with you traveling for

931
00:48:45,840 --> 00:48:49,000
Speaker 1: so long, this has just felt like a dream, to

932
00:48:49,040 --> 00:48:51,439
Speaker 1: be honest, and not be sharing a room with you

933
00:48:51,520 --> 00:48:53,719
Speaker 1: and hearing all your sounds and your snorts and your

934
00:48:53,760 --> 00:48:56,560
Speaker 1: coughing and and shouting at uber drivers and so it's

935
00:48:56,560 --> 00:48:59,040
Speaker 1: been really nice to have just like, you know, a

936
00:48:59,120 --> 00:49:01,239
Speaker 1: soft woman to go to sleep next to. I've only

937
00:49:01,239 --> 00:49:03,520
Speaker 1: met her, thank hung out with her twice. Not a compliment.

938
00:49:04,600 --> 00:49:07,719
Speaker 1: But now, now let me ask you a question. Last

939
00:49:07,760 --> 00:49:09,839
Speaker 1: time we spoke, you said that you were part of

940
00:49:10,040 --> 00:49:14,880
Speaker 1: um no strip gang called n s G. Yeah, baby, Yo,

941
00:49:15,160 --> 00:49:17,640
Speaker 1: have you been on that breathewright ship? I've been on

942
00:49:17,680 --> 00:49:22,200
Speaker 1: it every single night? Serious? No, I'm dead serious, I'm

943
00:49:22,280 --> 00:49:24,040
Speaker 1: I've been on it. I think I should be the

944
00:49:24,080 --> 00:49:26,879
Speaker 1: sponsor for fucking breathe right No strips. Why aren't you

945
00:49:27,239 --> 00:49:29,920
Speaker 1: Why I don't fucking know why I'm not the sponsor

946
00:49:29,960 --> 00:49:32,439
Speaker 1: for Breathe Right No Strips. I fucking sleep with them

947
00:49:32,520 --> 00:49:36,319
Speaker 1: every single night. Sometimes during the day, I podcast with them.

948
00:49:36,360 --> 00:49:39,160
Speaker 1: Sometimes that's not a This is not a plug of

949
00:49:39,200 --> 00:49:41,600
Speaker 1: Oh maybe we'll get breathed right like you Really, people

950
00:49:41,640 --> 00:49:43,719
Speaker 1: let listen to the podcast know how I get down.

951
00:49:43,760 --> 00:49:45,960
Speaker 1: My nose strip game is insane. They know how I

952
00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:48,440
Speaker 1: get down, and I'm glad. And there's two other people

953
00:49:48,880 --> 00:49:53,120
Speaker 1: that have sent me pictures of the nose strips since

954
00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:56,319
Speaker 1: we talked about the nose strips in Minnesota. They need

955
00:49:56,360 --> 00:50:01,000
Speaker 1: to start people I've converted. Yeah, you're you're changing any

956
00:50:01,080 --> 00:50:04,400
Speaker 1: sponsorships that they've ever had a percent. And you know what,

957
00:50:04,480 --> 00:50:06,239
Speaker 1: I take it up a notch because yes, I am

958
00:50:06,280 --> 00:50:07,880
Speaker 1: on the breathe right and it does open up my

959
00:50:07,960 --> 00:50:11,200
Speaker 1: nasal passages and it does help me breathe. And but

960
00:50:11,320 --> 00:50:13,400
Speaker 1: I am going to be honest with you, and this

961
00:50:13,440 --> 00:50:16,400
Speaker 1: is not something that I like to tell other people,

962
00:50:17,120 --> 00:50:19,439
Speaker 1: but we keep it real on the podcast. I'm having

963
00:50:19,440 --> 00:50:22,200
Speaker 1: a sleep apnea machine coming to my house. It's called

964
00:50:22,200 --> 00:50:24,160
Speaker 1: a c PAT machine. So that's something I have to

965
00:50:24,280 --> 00:50:26,399
Speaker 1: hide if I do have women over or friends over

966
00:50:26,400 --> 00:50:28,560
Speaker 1: for that matter, because I see a lot of Basically,

967
00:50:28,560 --> 00:50:31,600
Speaker 1: a c PAT machine is what what pumps oxygen where

968
00:50:31,600 --> 00:50:33,120
Speaker 1: you have to wear a mask because I have sleep

969
00:50:33,120 --> 00:50:35,080
Speaker 1: apnea where I wake up every two hours. It's kind

970
00:50:35,080 --> 00:50:37,759
Speaker 1: of like what people in six hundred pound Life use.

971
00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:40,760
Speaker 1: You know. It starts out with hey, meet meet Janine,

972
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:42,759
Speaker 1: and then you show her in her bed taking off

973
00:50:42,760 --> 00:50:45,879
Speaker 1: her sleep apnea mask and the oxygen tank. That's That's

974
00:50:45,960 --> 00:50:47,319
Speaker 1: what I'm going to have in a couple of days

975
00:50:47,360 --> 00:50:49,840
Speaker 1: of having an instructional video. Um, but I'm hoping that

976
00:50:49,880 --> 00:50:52,920
Speaker 1: Bat'll keep me asleep because I wake up every two hours,

977
00:50:52,960 --> 00:50:54,960
Speaker 1: and uh yeah, we need, we need whatever we could

978
00:50:54,960 --> 00:50:57,359
Speaker 1: do to keep you asleep, but shut the funk up, yeah, man,

979
00:50:57,680 --> 00:51:00,960
Speaker 1: you know, and whatever we could do to make that happened. Yeah.

980
00:51:00,960 --> 00:51:02,880
Speaker 1: Oh on man, this has been so nice. This is

981
00:51:02,880 --> 00:51:04,960
Speaker 1: like this is really a therapy session for me, like

982
00:51:05,000 --> 00:51:07,560
Speaker 1: in a way, and thank you, thank you, thank you,

983
00:51:08,840 --> 00:51:12,479
Speaker 1: thank you. Well. I appreciate it and appreciate you. Man. Well,

984
00:51:12,680 --> 00:51:14,600
Speaker 1: this is a good story. I know everybody's gonna be

985
00:51:14,640 --> 00:51:17,840
Speaker 1: happy that Mr Brazil is back in business. And I

986
00:51:17,960 --> 00:51:21,359
Speaker 1: wish nothing but the best is nothing but the best

987
00:51:21,360 --> 00:51:24,960
Speaker 1: going forward with your relationship or whatever however UM defines

988
00:51:25,040 --> 00:51:27,360
Speaker 1: itself with Rio, we're calling her Rio for now. I

989
00:51:27,400 --> 00:51:29,759
Speaker 1: don't think things are going to progress with with Rio.

990
00:51:29,840 --> 00:51:31,840
Speaker 1: To be honest with you, she's a really nice person.

991
00:51:32,880 --> 00:51:35,680
Speaker 1: I'm not really looking for that, but but it has

992
00:51:35,719 --> 00:51:41,880
Speaker 1: been really nice. And she's twenty five or twenty six, alright,

993
00:51:41,960 --> 00:51:43,440
Speaker 1: So it's not weird. It's not like you know, a

994
00:51:43,480 --> 00:51:45,400
Speaker 1: nineteen year old who is too dumb to know that

995
00:51:45,440 --> 00:51:47,560
Speaker 1: she could do better than me. It's it's somebody who's

996
00:51:47,880 --> 00:51:50,520
Speaker 1: you know, like her brain is actually like developed, like

997
00:51:50,560 --> 00:51:54,640
Speaker 1: she's making co current decisions. Like, hey, I I don't

998
00:51:54,680 --> 00:51:59,040
Speaker 1: mind being with that guy. That's crazy? Are you that guy?

999
00:51:59,080 --> 00:52:02,400
Speaker 1: I'm that guy? I am that guy. I thought like

1000
00:52:02,560 --> 00:52:05,399
Speaker 1: I wasn't that guy. I'm I apparently that guy. You're

1001
00:52:05,480 --> 00:52:08,440
Speaker 1: your Dean Collins A young shooter a K. Mr Brazil.

1002
00:52:09,160 --> 00:52:12,279
Speaker 1: That's who you are. I really love that's who you are.

1003
00:52:12,480 --> 00:52:15,919
Speaker 1: And everybody's pumped up about it. All right. We came,

1004
00:52:16,960 --> 00:52:20,440
Speaker 1: we saw, we disrupted. I mean, what a diverse, diverse

1005
00:52:20,760 --> 00:52:24,160
Speaker 1: all over the place. I am rappaport Stereo podcast. I'll

1006
00:52:24,239 --> 00:52:26,440
Speaker 1: let you walk us out of here, Shooter. You know

1007
00:52:26,480 --> 00:52:29,400
Speaker 1: how we do it. Um, Miles Jordan a K. The

1008
00:52:29,440 --> 00:52:32,120
Speaker 1: Bleached Brothers. Take me out of here with something real nice. Yes,

1009
00:52:32,239 --> 00:52:33,959
Speaker 1: take me out of here with something real proper, okay,

1010
00:52:33,960 --> 00:52:36,839
Speaker 1: but most importantly take me out of here with something real,

1011
00:52:36,920 --> 00:52:40,839
Speaker 1: real funky. Well, why can't you say it with me?

1012
00:52:40,960 --> 00:52:42,759
Speaker 1: I did say it, We say it with me. No,

1013
00:52:42,880 --> 00:52:45,279
Speaker 1: you're like real, You're you're doing like a nickel. Take

1014
00:52:45,280 --> 00:52:46,680
Speaker 1: me out of with some real nice, take me at

1015
00:52:46,719 --> 00:52:48,560
Speaker 1: some real proper, but most importantly, take me out of

1016
00:52:48,600 --> 00:52:51,680
Speaker 1: with something real funky funky. Dude, say it when I'm saying,

1017
00:52:51,680 --> 00:52:54,799
Speaker 1: because I said real funky UM, I say it the

1018
00:52:54,800 --> 00:52:57,280
Speaker 1: way I want to say it, motherfuck Try and follow

1019
00:52:57,320 --> 00:52:59,719
Speaker 1: your lips. Try it for time to take me out

1020
00:52:59,719 --> 00:53:05,759
Speaker 1: of here. I'm done. Fuck m