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Speaker 1: My dad started a new family without me, but I

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Speaker 1: realized my stepdad was more of a father. When I

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Speaker 1: was younger, I had a very good relationship with my dad.

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Speaker 1: My parents divorced when I was an infant, but I

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Speaker 1: spent weekdays with my mom and weekends with my dad.

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Speaker 1: My dad and I were like best friends, and we

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Speaker 1: had a simple routine every weekend where we'd get five

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Speaker 1: red box movies to finish. During the weekend, we'd go fishing,

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Speaker 1: we'd play soccer, and we'd bike to this little secret

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Speaker 1: playground near the zoo. By the way says it's gotta

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Speaker 1: be at least like early two thousands, mid maybe no

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Speaker 1: mid two thousands.

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Speaker 2: Do they still have John Times? John Times?

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Speaker 1: This comes from best Reditor Updates subbart. Something else I

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Speaker 1: was used to was my dad always having new girlfriends

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Speaker 1: that never lasted more than two weeks. The only one

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Speaker 1: who lasted longer, a woman I really liked who lasted

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Speaker 1: two years, left my dad when I was ten, But

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Speaker 1: my relationship with my dad was the same as ever

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Speaker 1: until I was twelve and my dad met his now wife.

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Speaker 1: The woman has two kids, one older and one younger

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Speaker 1: than me. They moved into my dad's apartment after only

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Speaker 1: two weeks. Wow, my room was already small, but my

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Speaker 1: tiny mattress and three small plastic drawers were shoved into

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Speaker 1: the corner of the room to make space for the

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Speaker 1: daughter's bunk bed and dress her. Before I knew it,

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Speaker 1: they started putting my bed in a closet until I

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Speaker 1: came to visit, and often would forget to take it

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Speaker 1: out at all.

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Speaker 2: Why is all like all the stories we read? It's like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: everyone's a Harry Potter kid.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, what's going on with your parents? When my dad

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Speaker 1: moved into a bigger house, the older sister got her

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Speaker 1: own room, while I had to share one with the

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Speaker 1: younger sister every weekend. The three small drawers I had

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Speaker 1: were soon just one drawer because the little sister wanted

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Speaker 1: the other two for her toys.

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Speaker 2: Slowly, my second bedroom, you need.

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Speaker 1: My I need both of my bedrooms.

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Speaker 2: Well last year last year I had thirty seven.

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Speaker 1: Last year, Slowly I started visiting my dad less and less.

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Speaker 1: Then everything went especially wrong when my dad got his

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Speaker 1: girlfriend pregnant after one year. Seems like that whole relationship

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Speaker 1: is moving very quickly. They got married, and I didn't

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Speaker 1: know that for a whole month because he didn't tell me.

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Speaker 2: No, I'm told he told you.

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Speaker 1: Were at the wedding. I also didn't know my baby

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Speaker 1: half sister was born until weeks after she came home

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Speaker 1: from the hospital.

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Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, seems like he's.

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Speaker 1: Just moved on to this new family.

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Speaker 2: Well you get one practice family. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: To make his new family happy, he started spoiling them

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Speaker 1: and stopped paying child support for me and my mom.

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Speaker 2: Can't Is that legal doesn't stop chain You can't stop.

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Speaker 1: You can't stop.

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Speaker 2: I don't think you can stop. You can stop at eighteen,

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Speaker 2: Well I go stop at eighteen.

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Speaker 1: But his wife is a jobless gold digger who only

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Speaker 1: cooks and cleans and shops. Her older daughter is having

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Speaker 1: her college paid for by my dad, and the younger

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Speaker 1: daughter is the definition of a ten year old sephor

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Speaker 1: a kid. As for my half sister, she is still

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Speaker 1: a toddler, but is clearly spoiled and hates the word no.

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Speaker 1: To be fair, all toddler's hate the word no. The

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Speaker 1: routine I used to have with my dad is now

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Speaker 1: four a kid. So okay. So there's this thing where

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Speaker 1: a lot of like middle schoolers are just running rampant

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Speaker 1: in Sephora and messing up all the makeup and getting

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Speaker 1: all the new they need. All the new Sephora drops.

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Speaker 2: Are their new drops.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. They just need all the new Stephora

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Speaker 1: stuff and they go in.

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Speaker 2: Why do you need new stuff? It doesn't your face

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Speaker 2: stay the same.

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Speaker 1: I don't know.

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Speaker 2: It's like Prime. It's like ten year olds with Prime. Yeah, well,

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Speaker 2: I guess what there's like there's new looks coming out

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Speaker 2: all yeah.

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Speaker 1: They're just like they're just they want to buy all

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Speaker 1: this expensive makeup and they're like, mummy, Mummy, I need

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Speaker 1: my makeup.

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Speaker 2: They're like ten, how watch his makeup? These days?

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Speaker 1: Makeup is expensive. I mean people who are like into makeup.

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Speaker 1: You get eyeshadow, which is like thirty bucks if it's

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Speaker 1: a cheaper, you know, small palette, and then you're buying

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Speaker 1: like foundation and concealer and mascare.

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Speaker 2: You gotta get your face washed stuff for like and.

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Speaker 1: Your face stuff like I don't know, a couple of

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Speaker 1: months make them longer, but like face care stuff doesn't.

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Speaker 3: But then you get bored of it and you're like, oh,

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Speaker 3: I need a new one. I need a new eyeliner.

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Speaker 3: I need a new eye shadow. Yeah, and it never stops.

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Speaker 1: Never friends, never ending cycle. As for my stepdad, he's

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Speaker 1: been with my mom since I was five, Apparently, though

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Speaker 1: I don't remember it, I once called him dad, and

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Speaker 1: because of that, my dad told me I shouldn't love

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Speaker 1: that man like a dad, because what what's going on?

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Speaker 2: Because you're pressing the wrong button.

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Speaker 1: I'm pressing the same button. Oh, okay, you should have

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Speaker 1: I'm not pressing the wrong button. I'm just pressing the

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Speaker 1: wrong side of the button. I don't use phones. And

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Speaker 1: because of that, my dad told me I shouldn't love

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Speaker 1: that man like a dad because he's not really my father.

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Speaker 1: Apparently that's why I started acting like I hated my stepdad.

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Speaker 1: I never knew I felt that way about him, since

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Speaker 1: he's never been anything but good to me, and in

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Speaker 1: the last few years I have felt much closer to him.

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Speaker 1: He feels like the dad that my birth father should

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Speaker 1: try to be.

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Speaker 2: Okay, so you have like a real dad, you got

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Speaker 2: you got your stepdad? Yeah, your stepdad. You know, sometimes

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Speaker 2: you know your your real dad is just just a

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Speaker 2: stepping stone, you know, through your stepdad. That's way better.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes the are the friends that you made along the way.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you made along the way.

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Speaker 1: Over time, my dad had started to treat me differently.

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Speaker 1: He rants to me about his political beliefs and conspiracy

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Speaker 1: theories about aliens and stuff.

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Speaker 2: Dude, sounds lit.

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Speaker 1: He also brags about his new business and his new family,

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Speaker 1: and if I ever tried to share anything with him,

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Speaker 1: he gets annoyed and shuts me up by continuing with

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Speaker 1: his stories. It's like now he sees me as a

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Speaker 1: buddy rather than his freaking daughter. Also, it was during

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Speaker 1: these last few years that I learned the reason he

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Speaker 1: and my mom divorced was not because they weren't right

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Speaker 1: for each other, but rather because my father cheated on

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Speaker 1: my mom while visiting. Called it in Canada.

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Speaker 2: Damn his girlfriends in Canada.

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Speaker 1: No, No, the mom was visiting her family in Canada.

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Speaker 1: I am now fifteen, and I have become a completely

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Speaker 1: different person than the one my birth dad remembers. I

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Speaker 1: no longer loved the beach or soccer. I now love

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Speaker 1: music and reading and writing.

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Speaker 2: I'm so mature.

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Speaker 1: I have written and published two books since two and

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Speaker 1: am writing the third in my series, Damn What I Was.

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Speaker 2: Like Diary of a Wimpy Kid. She's like one of

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Speaker 2: the Riders. The Diary of Kid is slap Yeah, that

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Speaker 2: would be crazy. Diary would be Kid was like my

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Speaker 2: one of my favorite but I love it.

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Speaker 1: Shows my stepdad supports my dreams and loves me so

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Speaker 1: much that he brags about me to friends and family

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Speaker 1: and calls me his daughter. My stepdad has an actual

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Speaker 1: daughter who I love like a real sister, though she

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Speaker 1: lives up north with her boyfriend and I don't see

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Speaker 1: her often. Still, though I love them more that I

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Speaker 1: loved my birth dad and half sister who I'm actually

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Speaker 1: related to. My dad blames me for never calling, though

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Speaker 1: because of how he's treated me lately, I don't feel

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Speaker 1: like I owe it to him. I also go months

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Speaker 1: at a time without visiting now because I no longer

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Speaker 1: feel comfortable at that house, especially since the bed I

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Speaker 1: sleep on over there is literally considered their guest bed.

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Speaker 1: They don't see his family and it's not cool.

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Speaker 2: Wait, but like if she doesn't live there, and well, she.

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Speaker 1: Doesn't live there full time because she goes back and

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Speaker 1: forth with her and they've never really given her a

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Speaker 1: room in my birth dad's house, I am a guest.

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Speaker 1: Because of all of this, I resent my dad. I

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Speaker 1: haven't told anyone about this, so no one is calling

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Speaker 1: me a jerk. But I'm wondering if I am because

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Speaker 1: my dad is in love with his new family, and

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Speaker 1: I'm wondering if it's bad that I'm not happy for him.

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Speaker 1: Am I the jerk?

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Speaker 2: You know? Sometimes you got to let go of your

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Speaker 2: dad so he can move on.

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Speaker 3: You know, you love something, let it go and if

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Speaker 3: it's meant to be, it'll come back to you.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly. Sometimes you find new dads.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes you find new dads. It's like it's like you're

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Speaker 2: never going to get it right on the first relationship exactly.

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Speaker 2: You're just you're learning, you don't really know what you're doing.

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Speaker 2: But but the second time you're a dad, you're like, okay,

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Speaker 2: like I know how to love you know this this

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Speaker 2: this family, Yeah exactly, toxic. Yeah, it just it just

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Speaker 2: takes some time.

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Speaker 1: Takes some time.

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Speaker 2: So like you know, one, two, three, practice families. By

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Speaker 2: the fourth you.

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Speaker 1: Bet by the fourth, No, no leniency.

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Speaker 2: You got to be a you gotta be a good dad.

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Speaker 1: But that Yeah, but there are some comments, just another

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Speaker 1: Saddie says, not the jerk. Your dad failed you. He's

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Speaker 1: the only reason why you don't have a relationship with him.

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Speaker 1: Glad your stepdad has good to you. Hope you're calling

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Speaker 1: him dad? Now?

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Speaker 2: Whoa Now?

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Speaker 3: A relationship goes two ways? Said your dad failed you

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Speaker 3: and I said, whoa? Now, relationship goes.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you failed your dad says absolutely not the jerk.

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Speaker 1: Your father failed on his only task of being exactly

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Speaker 1: that a father. So you are in your right to

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Speaker 1: cut any connection you want with him. Update. There is

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Speaker 1: an update, though, but I think what update?

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Speaker 2: You were surprised? I was. I mean, I'm like, I guess,

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Speaker 2: like what the core thing is that she now has

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Speaker 2: a better dad, But like what what? What? Like? What's

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Speaker 2: the problem? What's the problem here?

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Speaker 1: You've got you got a better dash. Her other dad sucks.

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Speaker 2: You're yeah, you're the best, and you're feeling.

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Speaker 1: Guilty for being mad at your other dad. It's okay,

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Speaker 1: he left you, he wasn't a father to you. You

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Speaker 1: don't owe him anything. Move on, find a new.

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Speaker 2: Dad, find a new dad. It's like, you know, just because.

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Speaker 1: Just because your stepdad's a rebound doesn't mean nice.

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Speaker 2: Just because he's not still your dad rebound dad. I think,

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Speaker 2: like you know, your real dad may have left you,

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Speaker 2: but that is not a reflection on like who you

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Speaker 2: are as a person. It's not a reflection of like

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Speaker 2: you not being able to find another dad that's gonna

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Speaker 2: be able to like like you more. And who knows,

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Speaker 2: maybe that new dad will have just left another family. Yes, yeah,

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Speaker 2: and yes, and then you could come together and like

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Speaker 2: really enjoy you really enjoy like like rebounding off each

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Speaker 2: other's broken family. Yes, and as I think this is

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Speaker 2: a great quote that I heard recently, But like to

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Speaker 2: rebounds cancel each other out.

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Speaker 1: But there's an update. Hello, there's an update. Oh, we

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Speaker 1: got a Dogie, we got a dog. Oh, she doesn't

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Speaker 1: want to be there. She's immedially trying to run away.

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Speaker 1: Oh it's so cute. So I made a post a

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Speaker 1: few months ago talking about how my dad has basically

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Speaker 1: stopped treating me like his daughter now that he has

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Speaker 1: a new family. Not much has happened since, but here's

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Speaker 1: an update. Anyway, since I made the initial post, I've

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Speaker 1: only visited my dad's house once, and safe to say,

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Speaker 1: I truly am nothing more than an uncomfortable guest in

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Speaker 1: the house. I should start off by saying that every

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Speaker 1: time I spend a few months without going to his house.

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Speaker 1: My dad tries to play all innocent and calls me

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Speaker 1: on Fridays to ask where he should pick me up.

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Speaker 1: I never answer because he always calls me when I'm

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Speaker 1: in class or busy with studying, so he'll call my mom.

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Speaker 1: But because he never asks me in advance, I tend

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Speaker 1: to have plans on weekends with my cousins, friends, or

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Speaker 1: just to work on writing since I'm still working on

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Speaker 1: my third book and it takes a lot of focus

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Speaker 1: that I can't get in his house. Oh, like she

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Speaker 1: can't focus in his house.

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Speaker 2: Okay, So she's splitting her time between her stepdad that's

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Speaker 2: great and her real dad that sucks.

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Speaker 1: Great, and she feels her to drop everything to go

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Speaker 1: hang out with him.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and he's like and like also, it's like, I

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Speaker 2: don't want to talk about you. I want to talk

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Speaker 2: about me.

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Speaker 1: He's like, let me tell you about the aliens. They're

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Speaker 1: coming down. They're taking your job.

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Speaker 2: Your job.

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Speaker 1: That's why you don't have a dad anymore, because I've

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Speaker 1: been replaced by an alien.

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Speaker 2: But that alien is doing a great job.

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Speaker 1: He's doing a really good job. Actually, I'm now just

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Speaker 1: gonna call him Eric. Whoa Eric? He's not your dad anymore.

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Speaker 1: He's Eric, He's a DJ. He's honestly not been as

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Speaker 1: much of a dad figure to my stepdad to me

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Speaker 1: as my stepdad has. Anyway, it was my mom who

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Speaker 1: decided I would go over to his house, despite the

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Speaker 1: fact that Eric hasn't paid child support in over two

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Speaker 1: years now and I hate going to his house. My

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Speaker 1: mom says I should just visit from time to time

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Speaker 1: to keep him from getting the court involved. That's a

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Speaker 1: great reason to get visit.

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Speaker 2: Well, he stopped paying, so you should stop.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you should get the court involved.

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Speaker 2: Get that bag. It's illegal for him not to pay.

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Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. It's illegal. It's illegal.

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Speaker 2: You should one hundred percent get the court of ball.

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Speaker 1: She confuses me, sometimes saying that he's a deadbeat man,

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Speaker 1: but also sometimes saying that he's my loving dad who

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Speaker 1: deserves my respect, and.

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Speaker 2: She probably thinks both of them at Yeah, time, you can.

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Speaker 2: You can hold that cognitive distance.

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Speaker 1: You can have both hold both. However, under the circumstances,

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Speaker 1: I'm fairly certain that nothing would be any different, since

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Speaker 1: I never visit him and he doesn't pay child support anyway.

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Speaker 1: In fact, once on Christmas he bought a bunch of

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Speaker 1: new gifts for his family and wrap them up and everything.

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Speaker 1: But weeks before Christmas, when I was visiting, he drove

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Speaker 1: to Walmart so his wife could do groceries, and he

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Speaker 1: handed me two hundred dollars and said, eh, Merry Christmas

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Speaker 1: by yourself something and then the rest can be child

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Speaker 1: support or whatever.

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Speaker 2: I don't think that's how it works. I don't like

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Speaker 2: child support like a couple hundred bucks at least a month.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I bought two books, but the rest of the

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Speaker 1: money that was supposedly child support was nothing near the

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Speaker 1: amount he owed. Yeah, yeah, I can imagine. I have

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Speaker 1: told my mom I would be happier if he lost

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Speaker 1: custody of me and my stepdad adopted me. But she

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Speaker 1: thinks that's too extreme and says, he's still your dad.

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Speaker 1: He deserves your respect and love. No he doesn't. He's

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Speaker 1: got to earn that respect and love. Yeah, he doesn't

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Speaker 1: just get to have.

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Speaker 2: It just because your blood does not need you have

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Speaker 2: to deal with the mud.

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Speaker 1: So true. Now about the weekend I visited him. From

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Speaker 1: the minute Eric picked me up, all he talked about

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Speaker 1: was his new family. He talked about the older sister

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Speaker 1: and her boyfriend, the younger sister and the shopping she does,

303
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Speaker 1: and my half sister, who can now talk a little bit.

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Speaker 1: I stayed silent the whole ride until he asked me

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Speaker 1: a question about my school, and when I answered his question,

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Speaker 1: he got frustrated and went into a conspiracy theory rant.

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Speaker 2: Wait why did that?

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Speaker 1: Why was that? Yeah? He was like, yeah, you know,

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Speaker 1: I've been going to school. I'm in, I'm in. I've

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Speaker 1: been liking my history classes, history a lot.

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Speaker 2: It's fake history. You know what they used in World

312
00:14:14,880 --> 00:14:23,280
Speaker 2: War one? Cats was actually was they'd put bonds and

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Speaker 2: carry bridges in World War one two.

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Speaker 3: But being around conspiracy theorists, it doesn't take much to

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Speaker 3: tip them over into.

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Speaker 2: A little rant.

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Speaker 1: You know, they always want to be there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I tuned him out for the rest of the drive.

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Speaker 1: After that, the rest of the weekend wasn't any better.

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Speaker 1: The older sister did what she always does when I

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Speaker 1: visit and locked herself in her room, only coming out

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Speaker 1: when I left the house or when I was in

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Speaker 1: the bathroom so she wouldn't have to talk to me.

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Speaker 1: And the younger sister had a friend of hers over

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Speaker 1: and her friend had her stuff tossed on my bed

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Speaker 1: and was sitting on it because it's the bed she sleeps.

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Speaker 1: And when she has sleepovers, you know, all sleep in

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Speaker 1: the same room. You have a sleepover, she has to

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Speaker 1: sleep in the guest room.

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Speaker 2: That's so not fun with a sleepover.

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Speaker 1: It's like a boring sleepover.

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Speaker 2: I feel like it's like putting one person in prison.

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00:15:05,200 --> 00:15:07,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'd be like, why are you even sleeping over

335
00:15:07,520 --> 00:15:07,920
Speaker 1: at that point?

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00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:09,680
Speaker 2: And then you're also like hearing all the fun they're

337
00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:11,520
Speaker 2: having in the other room, and you're just like trying

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Speaker 2: to sleep and you can't.

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Speaker 1: Eric's wife did a poor job of hiding how bothered

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00:15:15,480 --> 00:15:18,160
Speaker 1: she was by me visiting. More than once, she has

341
00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:22,160
Speaker 1: been completely shocked. I was visiting because Eric didn't tell her,

342
00:15:22,240 --> 00:15:25,360
Speaker 1: so she couldn't disagree. What so he's not telling anyone

343
00:15:25,400 --> 00:15:27,760
Speaker 1: that he wants OPI around, like because OPI was saying

344
00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:31,000
Speaker 1: she didn't get a lot of you know, for a warning.

345
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Speaker 2: Makes sense.

346
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Speaker 3: Whenever he has a whole nother family, he has to like,

347
00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:36,520
Speaker 3: one day, you'll have enough energy to be a family

348
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Speaker 3: for two families.

349
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Speaker 2: Work to just be a dad to one family.

350
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Speaker 1: Yeah, you gotta be a deav for two fans.

351
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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's kind of like, it's kind of like the

352
00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:46,600
Speaker 2: whole idea where it's like, you know, if you split

353
00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:48,520
Speaker 2: your focus too much, you're not going to do anything

354
00:15:48,560 --> 00:15:51,440
Speaker 2: right exactly. You just focus in on the one thing.

355
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Speaker 1: It's like, if you split your soul into seven wore cruxes,

356
00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:58,880
Speaker 1: then you're really not even a person anymore, and you

357
00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:01,560
Speaker 1: have to drink unicorn blood to survive.

358
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Speaker 2: And no one wants to do that. No one wants

359
00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:04,680
Speaker 2: to do that. One person wants to do that.

360
00:16:05,040 --> 00:16:08,040
Speaker 1: And also most of the weekend consisted of Error taking

361
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Speaker 1: me and my half sister to a playground so she

362
00:16:10,040 --> 00:16:12,120
Speaker 1: could run around with her friends, and I sat on

363
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:14,080
Speaker 1: a bench to read. But I didn't have much time

364
00:16:14,120 --> 00:16:16,880
Speaker 1: to myself since Eric kept leaving and told me to

365
00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:18,960
Speaker 1: keep an eye on my half sister, who is a

366
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:22,120
Speaker 1: wild and fussy kid. I'm not a babysitter, and while

367
00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:24,520
Speaker 1: I'm good with kids, that doesn't mean I enjoy putting

368
00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:26,920
Speaker 1: my own time aside to look after them when they're

369
00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:29,840
Speaker 1: not my responsibility. I had to spend two days in

370
00:16:29,880 --> 00:16:33,000
Speaker 1: either pure chaos or discomfort, and I had a talk

371
00:16:33,040 --> 00:16:35,160
Speaker 1: with my mom about me not wanting to go over

372
00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:37,680
Speaker 1: there anymore. She said that's fine, and she won't force

373
00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:40,120
Speaker 1: me to go anymore. But since she said that before,

374
00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:42,760
Speaker 1: I don't believe her. I don't have anyone to really

375
00:16:42,800 --> 00:16:45,640
Speaker 1: talk to about this, and this whole situation is stressing

376
00:16:45,680 --> 00:16:48,320
Speaker 1: me out because I don't remember my dad ever being

377
00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:51,280
Speaker 1: as happy as he is now, and I still sometimes

378
00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:53,600
Speaker 1: feel like I should be happy for him. I don't

379
00:16:53,600 --> 00:16:56,240
Speaker 1: know what to do, and any advice on anything I

380
00:16:56,240 --> 00:16:58,560
Speaker 1: could do would be helpful. Everyone who's commented on my

381
00:16:58,640 --> 00:17:00,600
Speaker 1: last post so far as said I'm not the jerk

382
00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:02,840
Speaker 1: and that Eric isn't acting the way a dad should,

383
00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:05,280
Speaker 1: but he still reaches out from time to time and

384
00:17:05,359 --> 00:17:08,800
Speaker 1: says I'm his baby girl he loves. Honestly, I almost

385
00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:11,040
Speaker 1: cry when he says that because it reminds me of

386
00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:13,760
Speaker 1: how we used to be. Am I overthinking all this

387
00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:17,080
Speaker 1: or of reacting? What should I do? Am I the

388
00:17:17,160 --> 00:17:19,520
Speaker 1: jerk here? Because I'm not happy for my dad? And

389
00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:21,439
Speaker 1: there are some comments, No, you're.

390
00:17:21,320 --> 00:17:26,320
Speaker 2: Not the jerk. I feel like he's acting so inconsistent, yeah,

391
00:17:26,359 --> 00:17:29,440
Speaker 2: that it's like causing you more hurt. You know, like

392
00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:32,000
Speaker 2: there's that whole thing in like relationships that it's actually

393
00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:34,920
Speaker 2: not the person that's like a constant that is the

394
00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:40,160
Speaker 2: cruelest person. It's the person that is like hot and cold. Yes,

395
00:17:40,280 --> 00:17:43,920
Speaker 2: Like that's that is more cruel than being consistently cruel.

396
00:17:44,040 --> 00:17:47,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you know what it feels like to you know,

397
00:17:47,040 --> 00:17:48,800
Speaker 1: have a good relationship.

398
00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:50,680
Speaker 2: With Yeah, And it feels like this this back and

399
00:17:50,720 --> 00:17:52,960
Speaker 2: forth of like I want you and then I don't

400
00:17:53,680 --> 00:17:57,760
Speaker 2: is putting ope on this emotional roller coaster that is

401
00:17:58,080 --> 00:18:02,080
Speaker 2: not going to benefit her her sanity and like her

402
00:18:02,119 --> 00:18:04,800
Speaker 2: emotional well being. And so at a certain point you

403
00:18:04,880 --> 00:18:08,520
Speaker 2: have to say, like, Okay, I've been continuously hurt by

404
00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:12,040
Speaker 2: this person. Do I want to subject myself to this

405
00:18:12,560 --> 00:18:15,760
Speaker 2: kind of behavior and this treatment again? Or is it

406
00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:19,760
Speaker 2: more healthy to remove myself and just stay with my stepdad?

407
00:18:19,800 --> 00:18:22,080
Speaker 2: And it feels like it's getting to the point to

408
00:18:22,119 --> 00:18:24,960
Speaker 2: remove where it's like time to just remove yourself a

409
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:25,400
Speaker 2: little bit.

410
00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:27,439
Speaker 1: I think so. I think so.

411
00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:29,280
Speaker 2: I would love to know what y'all think, though.

412
00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:32,919
Speaker 1: Yeah, but your thoughts In the comments, Kimberly finds his

413
00:18:32,960 --> 00:18:35,080
Speaker 1: mom is an enabler. Either she's trying to make make

414
00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:36,959
Speaker 1: up for her own guilt for choosing that dude as

415
00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:39,840
Speaker 1: her kid's bioparent, Like she's at fault for ope's treatment

416
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:43,359
Speaker 1: or she's also toxic and treats biodad as a sitter. Yeah,

417
00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:45,800
Speaker 1: hopefully not this. I don't know she is. I don't know.

418
00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:47,800
Speaker 1: I think she just has this idea that OP should

419
00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:49,320
Speaker 1: have a relationship with her dad, and.

420
00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:51,400
Speaker 2: I think that's just that's just coming from a place

421
00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:53,720
Speaker 2: of like what the norm.

422
00:18:53,520 --> 00:18:56,320
Speaker 1: Is y, But it doesn't seem like he really wants

423
00:18:56,359 --> 00:18:57,160
Speaker 1: to have that, so.

424
00:18:57,240 --> 00:18:59,120
Speaker 2: Rather, can I put my camera down a little bit?

425
00:18:59,280 --> 00:19:00,000
Speaker 2: I'm feeling like.

426
00:19:01,359 --> 00:19:03,760
Speaker 1: He's feeling a little cozy. But there are some comments

427
00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:06,560
Speaker 1: catch haifty five eight seven, who says you should tell

428
00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:08,679
Speaker 1: your mom the more she forces you to go to

429
00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:11,119
Speaker 1: your dad's, the more it's going to ruin your relationship

430
00:19:11,119 --> 00:19:13,400
Speaker 1: with her, as she's not listening to what you want

431
00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:15,639
Speaker 1: and how you feel. You should also tell her you

432
00:19:15,680 --> 00:19:17,800
Speaker 1: no longer trust what she says, as she has told

433
00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:20,200
Speaker 1: you before that she will no longer force you into going,

434
00:19:20,320 --> 00:19:22,359
Speaker 1: but she does it anyway. If you can't talk to

435
00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:24,560
Speaker 1: your mom, have a one on one chat with your

436
00:19:24,560 --> 00:19:26,400
Speaker 1: stepdad and see if he can help when it comes

437
00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:28,840
Speaker 1: to your mom. And there is another update, so let's

438
00:19:28,840 --> 00:19:29,359
Speaker 1: get into it.

439
00:19:29,440 --> 00:19:29,879
Speaker 2: Let's hit it.

440
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,920
Speaker 1: Hello everyone, it's only been a couple of days since

441
00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:35,680
Speaker 1: my last post. Since then, I have taken the advice

442
00:19:35,840 --> 00:19:37,879
Speaker 1: most of you have given me, and I talk to

443
00:19:37,920 --> 00:19:39,920
Speaker 1: my mom about how I don't want to keep being

444
00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:42,880
Speaker 1: forced by her to visit Eric, my owner, as most

445
00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:45,639
Speaker 1: of you refer to MS. Long story short, I'm not

446
00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:48,240
Speaker 1: one hundred percent shore. She won't continue to send me

447
00:19:48,240 --> 00:19:50,600
Speaker 1: over to Eric's house, but she did wind up sending

448
00:19:50,680 --> 00:19:53,360
Speaker 1: him long texts chewing him out for not treating me right,

449
00:19:53,440 --> 00:19:56,639
Speaker 1: and telling him to step up and pay his child support.

450
00:19:56,680 --> 00:19:58,800
Speaker 2: That's what okayz wow about darn time.

451
00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:02,080
Speaker 1: Come on. He did answer, though, so I followed some

452
00:20:02,119 --> 00:20:04,639
Speaker 1: other advice and wrote him a long text myself that

453
00:20:04,760 --> 00:20:07,560
Speaker 1: detailed how I felt about his treatment of me the

454
00:20:07,600 --> 00:20:10,119
Speaker 1: last few years. The thing is, as soon as I

455
00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:12,600
Speaker 1: sent the text, he called me to yell at me

456
00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:15,960
Speaker 1: and called me spoiled and over dramatic. He said it's

457
00:20:16,000 --> 00:20:18,520
Speaker 1: my fault we don't have relationships since I never visit

458
00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:21,000
Speaker 1: or talked to him anymore, and because I mentioned the

459
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:23,479
Speaker 1: unpaid child support, he said that I was only reaching

460
00:20:23,480 --> 00:20:26,280
Speaker 1: out to him for money. This guy sucks. I nearly

461
00:20:26,320 --> 00:20:28,919
Speaker 1: cried during that phone call and wound up just hanging

462
00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:31,320
Speaker 1: up on him. He sent some angry texts to my

463
00:20:31,400 --> 00:20:33,920
Speaker 1: mother as well, but later that day he left a

464
00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:37,199
Speaker 1: voicemail on my phone saying, money is guinda tight for

465
00:20:37,320 --> 00:20:39,760
Speaker 1: me right now. I'm completely broke.

466
00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:42,320
Speaker 2: You know I love you, right. I hope my love

467
00:20:42,760 --> 00:20:44,240
Speaker 2: can make up for the money. I laught.

468
00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:46,280
Speaker 1: He's like, I'm kind of tight on love right now,

469
00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:47,840
Speaker 1: so I can't give you that much either.

470
00:20:48,480 --> 00:20:50,000
Speaker 2: Well, maybe you should put some time in and get

471
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:51,520
Speaker 2: another job to pay for me.

472
00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:54,359
Speaker 1: Maybe you should stop I don't know being the worst.

473
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:56,960
Speaker 1: The thing is that I know that's a lie because

474
00:20:56,960 --> 00:21:00,200
Speaker 1: I'm always seeing my younger stepsister make TikTok videos showing

475
00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:02,959
Speaker 1: off the Sephora and other expensive crap he buys her

476
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,040
Speaker 1: all the time. He just doesn't have enough money to

477
00:21:05,080 --> 00:21:07,440
Speaker 1: give to you because he doesn't want to give you money.

478
00:21:07,440 --> 00:21:08,960
Speaker 1: He's like, oh, I want to pamper all of my

479
00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:11,200
Speaker 1: other kids, and he doesn't see you as like one

480
00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:12,360
Speaker 1: of his children anymore.

481
00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:14,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're a part time child, part time child, which

482
00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:16,000
Speaker 2: means you get part time benefits.

483
00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:21,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, you only get you get minied minimum wage love. Unfortunately, Yeah,

484
00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:24,000
Speaker 1: I think I'm done trying. And some of you suggested

485
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:26,439
Speaker 1: asking my stepdad for help. I wish I could, but

486
00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:28,520
Speaker 1: when I asked my mom again if he could adopt me,

487
00:21:28,840 --> 00:21:32,840
Speaker 1: she said something that absolutely crushed me. Apparently my stepdad

488
00:21:32,920 --> 00:21:35,560
Speaker 1: himself said he doesn't feel like he should adopt me.

489
00:21:35,840 --> 00:21:38,600
Speaker 1: My stepdad is a very kind and sympathetic man, but

490
00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:41,919
Speaker 1: he's also extremely unconfrontational and thinks it would be like

491
00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:44,879
Speaker 1: a slap in the face to Eric if he adopted me. Also,

492
00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:47,159
Speaker 1: because I noticed some confusion about this in the comments

493
00:21:47,160 --> 00:21:49,840
Speaker 1: on my last update, the reason my parents divorced was

494
00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:52,640
Speaker 1: because he cheated, but it wasn't with his current wife.

495
00:21:52,720 --> 00:21:55,520
Speaker 1: My parents split up when I was still basically an infant,

496
00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:58,720
Speaker 1: and Eric lived in Canada, where he jumped from girlfriend

497
00:21:58,720 --> 00:22:01,960
Speaker 1: to girlfriend there before he moved down here and continue

498
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:04,560
Speaker 1: to jump from girlfriend to girlfriend. When I was twelve,

499
00:22:04,760 --> 00:22:07,600
Speaker 1: he met and knocked up his wife, Alexandra, and married

500
00:22:07,640 --> 00:22:11,639
Speaker 1: her without telling me till a month after their courthouse wedding. Also,

501
00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:14,200
Speaker 1: some of you asked how old I am. I'm fifteen.

502
00:22:14,359 --> 00:22:18,000
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, so hard. That's crazy.

503
00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:21,720
Speaker 1: This is real, real bummer. It feels so ridiculous that

504
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:23,840
Speaker 1: I have this stress on me at my age, and

505
00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:26,600
Speaker 1: I really can't talk to anyone about it. I can't

506
00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:29,480
Speaker 1: talk to my stepdad because he's always working and I'm

507
00:22:29,520 --> 00:22:32,000
Speaker 1: only ever with him when my mom is there too,

508
00:22:32,240 --> 00:22:34,639
Speaker 1: And I don't like talking to her because she's always

509
00:22:34,680 --> 00:22:37,160
Speaker 1: telling me that I'm too young to really feel how

510
00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:39,919
Speaker 1: I feel. Ah, you're not too young, you know your

511
00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:40,720
Speaker 1: emotional too.

512
00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:41,920
Speaker 2: Young to feel those feelings.

513
00:22:42,080 --> 00:22:44,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I mean even if your feelings were more

514
00:22:44,880 --> 00:22:46,960
Speaker 1: exaggerated because of your youth, that it doesn't make the

515
00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:50,679
Speaker 1: many less valid. This really sucks. Everyone's no one's there

516
00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:50,879
Speaker 1: for me.

517
00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:53,800
Speaker 2: Like, no one Yeah, no one really understands op Yeah,

518
00:22:54,080 --> 00:22:54,920
Speaker 2: no one understands.

519
00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:56,200
Speaker 1: No one understands me.

520
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:57,439
Speaker 2: Makeup?

521
00:22:57,520 --> 00:22:59,640
Speaker 1: Is that too hard to ask for the last time

522
00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:01,920
Speaker 1: I tried to discuss my mental health with my mom,

523
00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:03,920
Speaker 1: I asked her if I could start going to therapy

524
00:23:04,119 --> 00:23:06,199
Speaker 1: and she said that therapists are dumb and that I

525
00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:08,960
Speaker 1: can just talk to her or pray to God if anything.

526
00:23:08,760 --> 00:23:11,760
Speaker 2: Is right God, or watch okay short Tom. Yeah, it's free,

527
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:13,480
Speaker 2: free therapy. Damn.

528
00:23:13,520 --> 00:23:15,040
Speaker 1: And the thing is that Opie does talk to her

529
00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:18,560
Speaker 1: and she's like, no, it's fine, just go see your dad. Sucks.

530
00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:20,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel like OPI he must feel really.

531
00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:24,919
Speaker 1: Alone, really isolated, and that I'm not super religious and

532
00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:28,600
Speaker 1: talking to her about anything serious makes me deeply uncomfortable.

533
00:23:28,720 --> 00:23:30,639
Speaker 1: It's not that I don't love her, since she's my

534
00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:34,000
Speaker 1: mom after all, but she's pretty intense and intimidating. My

535
00:23:34,119 --> 00:23:37,440
Speaker 1: dad has not reached out to me again since his voicemail. Frankly,

536
00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:39,280
Speaker 1: I don't want to even think about him for a

537
00:23:39,359 --> 00:23:42,240
Speaker 1: long while now. If he suddenly realizes how badly he

538
00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:46,040
Speaker 1: screwed up with me and apologizes, then maybe I'll try

539
00:23:46,040 --> 00:23:49,119
Speaker 1: to rebuild our relationship. As for my stepdad, he may

540
00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:51,199
Speaker 1: not want to adopt me, but he still calls me

541
00:23:51,280 --> 00:23:54,840
Speaker 1: his daughter, never just his stepdaughter, and I truly feel

542
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:57,439
Speaker 1: loved by him. I love his parents like they're my

543
00:23:57,440 --> 00:24:00,840
Speaker 1: own grandparents, and his whole family is so warm and loving.

544
00:24:01,160 --> 00:24:04,119
Speaker 1: I might make another update if anything else happens, but

545
00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:06,679
Speaker 1: for now, I'm just going to focus on school and

546
00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:09,640
Speaker 1: my books. Maybe now that I understand that Eric really

547
00:24:09,720 --> 00:24:12,320
Speaker 1: doesn't care that much about me anymore, I can finally

548
00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:15,760
Speaker 1: focus on finishing my third book. Just write about him

549
00:24:15,760 --> 00:24:16,240
Speaker 1: in your book.

550
00:24:16,320 --> 00:24:18,200
Speaker 3: Wait, I thought she was twenty two and she had

551
00:24:18,240 --> 00:24:21,000
Speaker 3: like two books, or was when she was fifteen.

552
00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:22,760
Speaker 2: So she's written two books at fifteen.

553
00:24:22,840 --> 00:24:25,639
Speaker 1: Yeah what and he doesn't. He can't even get her

554
00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:26,719
Speaker 1: like some child support.

555
00:24:27,080 --> 00:24:29,280
Speaker 2: Come on, wild dude, shout out her.

556
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:31,720
Speaker 1: She's kind of Oh yeah, you're killing the game. Just

557
00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:35,000
Speaker 1: write about your experiences in your books. That's therapy.

558
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:38,520
Speaker 2: I mean, hey, she is writing this experience in the

559
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:41,480
Speaker 2: reddit in reddit and like it's it's kind of novel worthy.

560
00:24:42,160 --> 00:24:44,720
Speaker 1: I dedicated my first book to him, and I honestly

561
00:24:44,760 --> 00:24:47,359
Speaker 1: don't regret it. I dedicated that book to the dad

562
00:24:47,440 --> 00:24:49,560
Speaker 1: he used to be. It's not like he'll ever read

563
00:24:49,560 --> 00:24:51,560
Speaker 1: that book since he doesn't think it's smart that I

564
00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:53,879
Speaker 1: want to be a writer. But I don't care. But

565
00:24:54,160 --> 00:24:55,320
Speaker 1: she's already published them.

566
00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:58,480
Speaker 2: Come on, yeah, come on, give her some support, give

567
00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:00,560
Speaker 2: her like a little bit of support. That's crazy that

568
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:04,879
Speaker 2: you're not supporting your daughter who's like, he's a author,

569
00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:08,720
Speaker 2: two books, working on her third, working on her thirds,

570
00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:10,919
Speaker 2: not even out of college, dude or high school.

571
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:13,760
Speaker 1: Thank you to everyone who gave me advice and told

572
00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:16,320
Speaker 1: me I wasn't the jerk. I feel so much better

573
00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:20,280
Speaker 1: with those reassurances. Thank you. And there are some comments

574
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:24,359
Speaker 1: and and another update.

575
00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:27,960
Speaker 3: Oh wow, wow, it's smart, I would say, This is

576
00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:29,800
Speaker 3: pretty smart. You're going to read it to get other

577
00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:32,640
Speaker 3: people's advice even though you can't go to therapy.

578
00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:35,199
Speaker 2: Yeah, go to the go to the free go to

579
00:25:35,240 --> 00:25:36,200
Speaker 2: the free advice place.

580
00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:38,840
Speaker 1: You know, go to the free advice place, and all

581
00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 1: the people in the comments can give you free therapy.

582
00:25:41,560 --> 00:25:44,680
Speaker 2: Free therapy that is always very tempered.

583
00:25:44,480 --> 00:25:48,320
Speaker 1: Always nice and sweet and helpful.

584
00:25:48,680 --> 00:25:50,399
Speaker 2: Really always even the bad ones.

585
00:25:50,280 --> 00:25:52,800
Speaker 1: Even the bad ones. But there are some comments. A

586
00:25:52,840 --> 00:25:55,360
Speaker 1: tiny dancer says, I've replied that maybe he'd stop being

587
00:25:55,359 --> 00:25:57,840
Speaker 1: broke if he wasn't spoiling his new family and ignoring

588
00:25:57,880 --> 00:26:00,080
Speaker 1: his obligations to his actual daughter, and tell him and

589
00:26:00,119 --> 00:26:02,600
Speaker 1: that honestly, he hasn't acted like your dad in years,

590
00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:04,960
Speaker 1: so let's just stop pretending and he could be happy

591
00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:08,520
Speaker 1: with his replacements. Because you're done being ignored and walking

592
00:26:08,560 --> 00:26:11,960
Speaker 1: on by someone who obviously doesn't want me there, Push

593
00:26:12,040 --> 00:26:14,679
Speaker 1: me away. Tiny dancer Jess Landers says, you say your

594
00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:17,240
Speaker 1: father sent you a text saying you know I love you,

595
00:26:17,280 --> 00:26:20,040
Speaker 1: don't you? You should respond no, no, I don't know

596
00:26:20,080 --> 00:26:22,600
Speaker 1: this at all. I know you say you do, but

597
00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:25,240
Speaker 1: you have never shown me this love. Love isn't just

598
00:26:25,280 --> 00:26:27,320
Speaker 1: a word you can throw at me as you throw

599
00:26:27,359 --> 00:26:31,000
Speaker 1: a bone to a dog. Yeah, a feeling of support

600
00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:34,359
Speaker 1: and safety. It's a deep felt knowledge of total acceptance.

601
00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:37,040
Speaker 1: It's the tissue when I cry the backgroub when I'm

602
00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:39,720
Speaker 1: sad or hurt. It's that wink at a shared joke,

603
00:26:39,760 --> 00:26:43,440
Speaker 1: in the hug of joy and glorious celebration that Daddy,

604
00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:47,040
Speaker 1: dear is love. That is what I both expect a

605
00:26:47,119 --> 00:26:50,080
Speaker 1: need from you as things stand. You're a horrible disappointment

606
00:26:50,119 --> 00:26:51,080
Speaker 1: and a terrible father.

607
00:26:51,200 --> 00:26:55,080
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, but there's an update. Wow. Also just

608
00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:56,440
Speaker 2: kind of vicerated.

609
00:26:56,800 --> 00:27:00,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, these comments are like, here, this is exactly what

610
00:27:00,280 --> 00:27:02,280
Speaker 1: you used to say, word for word, and it'll work.

611
00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:03,160
Speaker 2: And it did well.

612
00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:05,040
Speaker 1: We don't know, they haven't. That wasn't no piecing.

613
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:08,520
Speaker 2: Well I did for me. It worked for me.

614
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:10,240
Speaker 1: I was like, it's been tested.

615
00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:12,800
Speaker 2: I was riveted and ravited.

616
00:27:12,960 --> 00:27:14,320
Speaker 1: This is peer reviewed.

617
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:17,840
Speaker 2: You can you can take it. We are the peers exactly.

618
00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:21,639
Speaker 2: But I feel like OP has been fairly straightforward with

619
00:27:21,880 --> 00:27:24,000
Speaker 2: I think so with the dad, Like it's like, how

620
00:27:24,000 --> 00:27:26,840
Speaker 2: many opportunities can you give real dad before you just

621
00:27:26,880 --> 00:27:28,359
Speaker 2: have to say, like I'm cutting you off?

622
00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:31,600
Speaker 1: I think I think yeah, I think so I don't

623
00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:34,480
Speaker 1: know if I think he's made no efforts and it

624
00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:37,080
Speaker 1: shouldn't be on her to constantly have to kind of

625
00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 1: whip him back into dad shape. Yeah, you should want

626
00:27:40,040 --> 00:27:42,480
Speaker 1: to do that himself and take him to court to

627
00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:44,800
Speaker 1: a rat bot. You shouldn't have to beg for. Love

628
00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:47,520
Speaker 1: should be given willingly. But there is an update.

629
00:27:47,920 --> 00:27:48,360
Speaker 2: That's it.

630
00:27:48,520 --> 00:27:51,639
Speaker 1: Hi everyone, it's been about nine days since my last update.

631
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:53,359
Speaker 1: I just want to say thank you all for your

632
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:56,000
Speaker 1: support and advice. There were a lot of people asking

633
00:27:56,040 --> 00:27:58,720
Speaker 1: similar questions and it was all a bit overwhelming, so

634
00:27:58,840 --> 00:28:01,080
Speaker 1: I didn't respond to any of them directly, but I

635
00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:03,840
Speaker 1: will answer those questions here before I get onto the

636
00:28:03,880 --> 00:28:06,040
Speaker 1: actual reason for this update. So a lot of you

637
00:28:06,080 --> 00:28:08,000
Speaker 1: were saying that I should talk to a school counselor

638
00:28:08,040 --> 00:28:09,600
Speaker 1: or something, which actually I was kind of thinking. I

639
00:28:09,640 --> 00:28:12,000
Speaker 1: was like they saw in a teacher.

640
00:28:12,240 --> 00:28:14,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, I saw that in one of the comments. Yeah,

641
00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:15,840
Speaker 2: that said like, oh, yeah, maybe you can talk to

642
00:28:15,840 --> 00:28:18,240
Speaker 2: a school counselor. That is what I say, a good

643
00:28:18,359 --> 00:28:20,520
Speaker 2: free option for what you are trying to do here.

644
00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:22,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe not as like they don't They probably don't

645
00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:23,200
Speaker 1: have all of.

646
00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:26,280
Speaker 2: These the resources or the equipment, but it's a good

647
00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:28,600
Speaker 2: starting blow. It's like, I mean, the same as Reddit, right,

648
00:28:28,640 --> 00:28:31,200
Speaker 2: It's like Reddit is not the end all be all. Yeah,

649
00:28:31,240 --> 00:28:34,560
Speaker 2: it is the starting point for helping yourself exactly.

650
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:36,760
Speaker 1: And sometimes you don't even need a person to give

651
00:28:36,760 --> 00:28:39,200
Speaker 1: you advice, you just need to rant.

652
00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:39,720
Speaker 2: That's true.

653
00:28:39,840 --> 00:28:42,720
Speaker 1: The thing is that I do virtual homeschool. Oh no,

654
00:28:43,120 --> 00:28:46,120
Speaker 1: So she's so isolated and my mom works from home

655
00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:48,080
Speaker 1: a lot, so I'm honestly just a bit scared to

656
00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:50,560
Speaker 1: try that. Plus, even if I did talk to my

657
00:28:50,640 --> 00:28:53,200
Speaker 1: counselor without my mom being around to hear, I really

658
00:28:53,200 --> 00:28:55,600
Speaker 1: don't trust any adults to keep these kinds of things

659
00:28:55,640 --> 00:28:58,560
Speaker 1: to themselves. I know that sounds a bit dumb and paranoid,

660
00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:00,880
Speaker 1: but it's really just how my brains. A lot of

661
00:29:00,880 --> 00:29:02,800
Speaker 1: you also said that I should bring up the therapy

662
00:29:02,840 --> 00:29:04,840
Speaker 1: thing with my mom again, but I know for a

663
00:29:04,920 --> 00:29:07,520
Speaker 1: fact that won't work. My mom really doesn't believe in

664
00:29:07,600 --> 00:29:10,400
Speaker 1: therapy and believes that praying to God or having her

665
00:29:10,440 --> 00:29:13,920
Speaker 1: preach about the Bible to me will solve everything. As

666
00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:16,880
Speaker 1: for my stepdad, I love the guy like a real father,

667
00:29:17,080 --> 00:29:19,600
Speaker 1: and I see him as my true dad, even if

668
00:29:19,640 --> 00:29:21,760
Speaker 1: he doesn't want to adopt me, but he really is

669
00:29:21,840 --> 00:29:24,360
Speaker 1: no help with the therapy issue either, because he always

670
00:29:24,400 --> 00:29:27,320
Speaker 1: just agrees with whatever my mom says to avoid arguments.

671
00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:30,000
Speaker 2: And I also understand the stepdad not wanting to adopt

672
00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:33,880
Speaker 2: because it could be that if he did adopt, the

673
00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:37,040
Speaker 2: real dad would cause a whole ruckus and it would

674
00:29:37,080 --> 00:29:40,040
Speaker 2: actually be more pain for op yeah, than if he

675
00:29:40,080 --> 00:29:40,760
Speaker 2: didn't adopt.

676
00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:42,400
Speaker 1: No, there's a lot of I think there's a lot

677
00:29:42,440 --> 00:29:45,640
Speaker 1: of things that would potentially go wrong in that situation.

678
00:29:46,080 --> 00:29:48,920
Speaker 2: Yes, it's understandable, it's understandable.

679
00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:51,120
Speaker 1: But I am doing fun right now though, And I

680
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:53,640
Speaker 1: honestly think things are going to start getting better. And

681
00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:55,720
Speaker 1: I think this is because I'm pretty sure my mom's

682
00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:59,280
Speaker 1: finally got a file for soul custody and court order

683
00:29:59,400 --> 00:30:01,160
Speaker 1: child support. Right there, we.

684
00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:03,000
Speaker 2: Go, Wow, that's what we need.

685
00:30:03,960 --> 00:30:05,760
Speaker 1: Change, Yeah, at least in the mom.

686
00:30:05,880 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 2: Yeah.

687
00:30:06,320 --> 00:30:08,160
Speaker 1: One thing I guess I should have made clear is

688
00:30:08,160 --> 00:30:10,640
Speaker 1: that my parents sorted out their custody in child support

689
00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:14,760
Speaker 1: agreement amongst themselves when they divorced. The agreement is that

690
00:30:14,800 --> 00:30:17,040
Speaker 1: I spend weekends with my dad and he pays my

691
00:30:17,080 --> 00:30:19,720
Speaker 1: mom one hundred dollars per week. I'm pretty sure my

692
00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:22,400
Speaker 1: dad only stuck to that agreement to keep himself looking

693
00:30:22,440 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 1: good until he could finish his US legalization process since

694
00:30:26,600 --> 00:30:29,080
Speaker 1: he used to be in an immigrant from Canada. Once

695
00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:32,000
Speaker 1: he was legalized, he stopped paying child support and began

696
00:30:32,120 --> 00:30:35,200
Speaker 1: spoiling his new family. Anyway, I went to my dad's

697
00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:38,640
Speaker 1: house last weekend. This time, my mom didn't force me,

698
00:30:38,800 --> 00:30:41,560
Speaker 1: and I actually decided I wanted to go because I

699
00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:45,000
Speaker 1: wanted to give my dad one last chance. He picked

700
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:47,120
Speaker 1: me up from my mom's house. We didn't get down

701
00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:51,640
Speaker 1: the street before we were fighting. I was excitedly telling

702
00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:53,760
Speaker 1: him about a business idea I had where I can

703
00:30:53,840 --> 00:30:56,960
Speaker 1: make book boxes and sell books with DIY necklaces and

704
00:30:57,000 --> 00:30:59,960
Speaker 1: hand painted bookmarks that match book covers. And he was

705
00:31:00,120 --> 00:31:03,760
Speaker 1: telling me my idea was stupid and unprofitable and a

706
00:31:03,800 --> 00:31:04,880
Speaker 1: waste of money and time.

707
00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:09,480
Speaker 2: Waste of money and time, like you're the one who's broke. Yeah,

708
00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:11,720
Speaker 2: who are you to be lecturing someone on business?

709
00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:14,560
Speaker 1: You don't know anything about business or family or that.

710
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:18,440
Speaker 2: Okay with dadding this is on topic, but like a

711
00:31:18,480 --> 00:31:21,160
Speaker 2: little bit off. I'm a big fan of if you

712
00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:24,280
Speaker 2: see someone's going in the right direction with an interest,

713
00:31:24,840 --> 00:31:30,040
Speaker 2: be very supportive, even if it's initially bad exactly, then

714
00:31:30,120 --> 00:31:32,960
Speaker 2: be hyper critical of like the second, or then be

715
00:31:33,000 --> 00:31:36,200
Speaker 2: critical as they are like getting into it. Yes, I

716
00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:40,320
Speaker 2: generally don't think it's helpful to be critical with a

717
00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:45,040
Speaker 2: new art form or a new interest right out the gate,

718
00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:50,040
Speaker 2: because then you'll kids, you'll squash creativity and their their

719
00:31:50,320 --> 00:31:51,040
Speaker 2: their motivation.

720
00:31:51,160 --> 00:31:53,400
Speaker 1: Yeah. It's like if you know, a little kid came

721
00:31:53,480 --> 00:31:55,719
Speaker 1: up to you and showed you a drawing that they

722
00:31:55,760 --> 00:31:58,760
Speaker 1: made and you're like, wow, the proportions on this is

723
00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:03,920
Speaker 1: completely wrong. He's don't much at all. It's like, no,

724
00:32:04,040 --> 00:32:06,360
Speaker 1: you support them, and then they get better.

725
00:32:06,600 --> 00:32:09,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, but there's there's a certain point where you offer

726
00:32:09,360 --> 00:32:11,320
Speaker 2: like feedback because like for you, like one of my

727
00:32:11,360 --> 00:32:13,840
Speaker 2: friends came with a video and he's like, ah, what

728
00:32:13,880 --> 00:32:15,520
Speaker 2: do you think. I'm like, dude, this is great, which

729
00:32:15,560 --> 00:32:18,720
Speaker 2: it was like the initial framework was really good, but

730
00:32:18,760 --> 00:32:21,400
Speaker 2: it wasn't like like amazing, amazing, But then the second

731
00:32:21,400 --> 00:32:24,240
Speaker 2: one he made was leagues better. I'm like, dude, this

732
00:32:24,320 --> 00:32:27,080
Speaker 2: second one is so much better. And I said all

733
00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:29,200
Speaker 2: the ways that it was better, even though it's like

734
00:32:29,280 --> 00:32:30,880
Speaker 2: not perfect, but it was so much better than the

735
00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:32,680
Speaker 2: first one. Yeah, and then you can kind of give

736
00:32:32,680 --> 00:32:35,640
Speaker 2: this feedback of like okay, like this is how things

737
00:32:35,680 --> 00:32:40,040
Speaker 2: are better, how they're improving without so you're giving constructive criticism,

738
00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:42,520
Speaker 2: but with like a frame of reference of what's come before,

739
00:32:42,640 --> 00:32:43,800
Speaker 2: rather than just saying it's bad.

740
00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:46,560
Speaker 1: Exactly. It was an hour long drive to his house,

741
00:32:46,640 --> 00:32:49,640
Speaker 1: and he was getting political or angry over every little

742
00:32:49,680 --> 00:32:51,480
Speaker 1: thing I said. When I told him I was thinking

743
00:32:51,520 --> 00:32:54,640
Speaker 1: about applying to colleges like Harvard or University of Chicago

744
00:32:54,720 --> 00:32:55,240
Speaker 1: in the future.

745
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:56,600
Speaker 2: Harvard, you went to Harvard fear right?

746
00:32:56,800 --> 00:33:00,760
Speaker 1: Yes. He began to yell about all the dayangerous Cuban

747
00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:04,120
Speaker 1: and Mexican immigrants in Chicago, and began saying that Harvard

748
00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:06,200
Speaker 1: is a waste of time since it's just as good

749
00:33:06,200 --> 00:33:08,960
Speaker 1: as any other college, but rich people go there, which

750
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:10,560
Speaker 1: is why it's so famous.

751
00:33:10,800 --> 00:33:12,760
Speaker 2: I mean true, I mean a little bit true. You

752
00:33:13,200 --> 00:33:15,800
Speaker 2: don't go to Harvard for the education. Yeah, it's like

753
00:33:15,880 --> 00:33:17,080
Speaker 2: go to the Harvard for the network.

754
00:33:17,240 --> 00:33:19,520
Speaker 1: I wound up yelling at him that he can't act

755
00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:22,240
Speaker 1: so high and mighty over non white immigrants because he

756
00:33:22,320 --> 00:33:24,959
Speaker 1: was also an immigrant not too long ago. Also, I

757
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:28,160
Speaker 1: never understood why my dad is always so racist about

758
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:30,880
Speaker 1: Hispanic people when my mom and his current wife are

759
00:33:30,920 --> 00:33:31,840
Speaker 1: both Latinas.

760
00:33:32,040 --> 00:33:36,280
Speaker 2: He's like, I can't have any more Mexicans coming in

761
00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:39,320
Speaker 2: because they might steal my wife because they're so good looking.

762
00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:43,040
Speaker 2: I'm very attracted all these Latinas.

763
00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:47,200
Speaker 1: He's like, if I see another Latina, I'm good at

764
00:33:47,240 --> 00:33:51,320
Speaker 1: starting a family. He went on one rant after another,

765
00:33:51,440 --> 00:33:53,320
Speaker 1: and I was so sick of it that instead of

766
00:33:53,360 --> 00:33:56,720
Speaker 1: staying quiet like always, I actually argued back. Because of that,

767
00:33:56,920 --> 00:33:59,880
Speaker 1: my dad spent the whole weekend complaining about my bad attitude.

768
00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:02,240
Speaker 1: I told my mom about all of this. I think

769
00:34:02,280 --> 00:34:04,680
Speaker 1: the final nail in the coffin that finally pushed her

770
00:34:04,680 --> 00:34:07,080
Speaker 1: to want soul custody was when I told her about

771
00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:09,600
Speaker 1: a rant my dad went on about the difference between

772
00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:12,919
Speaker 1: men and women. I wound up memorizing and writing down

773
00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:15,680
Speaker 1: everything he said and texted it to my mom. I

774
00:34:15,719 --> 00:34:17,799
Speaker 1: asked her not to talk to him about it, but

775
00:34:17,840 --> 00:34:21,200
Speaker 1: she was so pissed at him. Here are some of

776
00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:23,719
Speaker 1: the things he said. Ninety nine percent of women want

777
00:34:23,719 --> 00:34:26,440
Speaker 1: to latch onto rich men. Didn't you say you're broke?

778
00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:28,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm part of the one percent.

779
00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:33,000
Speaker 1: Nearly all women are greedy and unloyal. Men don't like

780
00:34:33,480 --> 00:34:37,040
Speaker 1: successful and independent women because they're prideful and bossy. It's

781
00:34:37,040 --> 00:34:39,480
Speaker 1: more important for a wife to respect her husband than

782
00:34:39,480 --> 00:34:41,799
Speaker 1: it is for him to respect her. It's wrong for

783
00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:44,719
Speaker 1: wives to make more than their husbands, and so much

784
00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:47,880
Speaker 1: more this guy is. He's a piece of work. And

785
00:34:47,920 --> 00:34:51,480
Speaker 1: then he smiled and said, but you're the exception, pretty girl.

786
00:34:51,920 --> 00:34:53,359
Speaker 1: Oh wow, I hate this man.

787
00:34:53,680 --> 00:34:55,719
Speaker 2: I hate everything that this guy's did.

788
00:34:55,840 --> 00:34:58,399
Speaker 1: I hate him so much. There was so much more

789
00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:01,040
Speaker 1: that happened just last weekend, like him saying some of

790
00:35:01,080 --> 00:35:03,880
Speaker 1: my guy friends don't really count as real men since

791
00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:06,120
Speaker 1: some of them are gay, and trying to tell me

792
00:35:06,160 --> 00:35:09,360
Speaker 1: my summer volunteering opportunity is a bad idea since the

793
00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:12,319
Speaker 1: people there are different, even though my mom's side of

794
00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:15,120
Speaker 1: the family comes from there. I won't list every annoying

795
00:35:15,160 --> 00:35:17,920
Speaker 1: thing he did. And I'm finally done. This was his

796
00:35:18,000 --> 00:35:20,080
Speaker 1: last chance and he blew it. I just want to say,

797
00:35:20,120 --> 00:35:22,600
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure my mom is not sending me over anymore.

798
00:35:22,800 --> 00:35:26,120
Speaker 1: She's spent all morning looking for my birth certificate because

799
00:35:26,120 --> 00:35:28,640
Speaker 1: she's wondering if she needs it in court. She wants

800
00:35:28,680 --> 00:35:30,680
Speaker 1: to get me full time and have my dad paid

801
00:35:30,760 --> 00:35:33,400
Speaker 1: child support. At the moment, he owes a lot of

802
00:35:33,480 --> 00:35:36,680
Speaker 1: child support and having him contribute financially would help me

803
00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:40,080
Speaker 1: so much with preparing for college, get into Harvard, make

804
00:35:40,160 --> 00:35:43,399
Speaker 1: him pay for Harvard money. Although he did not mention

805
00:35:43,440 --> 00:35:45,279
Speaker 1: the names of my books in the other posts, I

806
00:35:45,320 --> 00:35:47,040
Speaker 1: didn't share them because I didn't want a bunch of

807
00:35:47,120 --> 00:35:49,400
Speaker 1: Internet strangers seeing my social media.

808
00:35:49,200 --> 00:35:50,320
Speaker 2: Attack secret marketing.

809
00:35:50,640 --> 00:35:52,800
Speaker 1: Yeah at the book at the back of the book,

810
00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:55,680
Speaker 1: but I will share the titles with anyone who dms me.

811
00:35:55,960 --> 00:35:59,080
Speaker 1: I will probably make another update if anything else happens

812
00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:01,320
Speaker 1: and they're is another.

813
00:36:01,040 --> 00:36:03,000
Speaker 2: Update, another update, if.

814
00:36:02,840 --> 00:36:04,799
Speaker 1: He says, hopefully, my next update will be after we've

815
00:36:04,840 --> 00:36:05,440
Speaker 1: gone to court.

816
00:36:05,960 --> 00:36:14,040
Speaker 2: Oh right, money child support comes through. I'm assuming yep,

817
00:36:14,160 --> 00:36:17,040
Speaker 2: oh boy, yep, oh boy. All right, let's see oh.

818
00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:22,600
Speaker 1: Boy, just launching rite into it. Update. Hey everyone, it's

819
00:36:22,640 --> 00:36:25,360
Speaker 1: been three months since my last post and quite a

820
00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:27,399
Speaker 1: lot of crappy stuff has gone down.

821
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:30,480
Speaker 2: Oh I still canak.

822
00:36:29,760 --> 00:36:33,280
Speaker 1: Okay, just let her freaking write her books in peace.

823
00:36:33,760 --> 00:36:35,800
Speaker 1: Let me start off by saying thank you to everyone

824
00:36:35,840 --> 00:36:38,279
Speaker 1: who DM me and sent me their support. I know

825
00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:40,360
Speaker 1: I haven't answered a lot of you, but that's just

826
00:36:40,360 --> 00:36:43,239
Speaker 1: because the amount of messages is well over fifty and

827
00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:46,319
Speaker 1: it's kind of overwhelming, But I appreciate all of you,

828
00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:49,080
Speaker 1: especially those who have reached out and said that they're

829
00:36:49,080 --> 00:36:52,040
Speaker 1: going through similar things. Oh, that they've gone through similar things.

830
00:36:52,120 --> 00:36:54,680
Speaker 3: This exact same thing where you write three books and

831
00:36:54,719 --> 00:36:55,759
Speaker 3: your dad doesn't support you.

832
00:36:55,960 --> 00:36:56,440
Speaker 2: I hope not.

833
00:36:56,560 --> 00:36:59,600
Speaker 1: It's a really common it's a really common thing. You're

834
00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:01,719
Speaker 1: all so strong, and I hope you're doing all right.

835
00:37:02,080 --> 00:37:05,080
Speaker 1: So as for the actual update, my mom never took

836
00:37:05,239 --> 00:37:06,800
Speaker 1: Eric Bio dad to court.

837
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:10,719
Speaker 2: What the heck?

838
00:37:11,120 --> 00:37:13,520
Speaker 1: After three days of listening to my mom and Eric

839
00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:16,399
Speaker 1: scream at each other over the phone, insulting each other

840
00:37:16,440 --> 00:37:19,239
Speaker 1: and hearing Eric yell about child support, being stupid at

841
00:37:19,239 --> 00:37:22,320
Speaker 1: a government con he sent two hundred dollars to shut

842
00:37:22,320 --> 00:37:24,480
Speaker 1: my mom up and now sends that same amount of

843
00:37:24,480 --> 00:37:25,440
Speaker 1: money randomly.

844
00:37:25,840 --> 00:37:29,320
Speaker 2: That is that is the same as what's been happening.

845
00:37:29,320 --> 00:37:30,360
Speaker 2: Nothing has been resolved.

846
00:37:30,360 --> 00:37:32,760
Speaker 1: My mom lied about not forcing me to see him again.

847
00:37:33,080 --> 00:37:35,399
Speaker 1: I remembered we were in the car when Eric called

848
00:37:35,440 --> 00:37:37,440
Speaker 1: on a random Friday to ask if I wanted to

849
00:37:37,480 --> 00:37:40,239
Speaker 1: come over, and maybe I was a little cold, but

850
00:37:40,280 --> 00:37:41,840
Speaker 1: my mom got mad at me after I said I

851
00:37:41,880 --> 00:37:44,520
Speaker 1: didn't want to go. I reminded her that she promised

852
00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:46,520
Speaker 1: not to force me, and I got yelled at and

853
00:37:46,560 --> 00:37:50,520
Speaker 1: guilt tripped into calling Eric back and agreeing that weekend

854
00:37:50,680 --> 00:37:52,960
Speaker 1: was awful. Eric tried to fight with me on his

855
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:55,920
Speaker 1: sexist beliefs. He complained that I was complaining too much

856
00:37:56,000 --> 00:37:58,960
Speaker 1: about his inappropriate jokes and stories, and then there was

857
00:37:59,000 --> 00:38:03,000
Speaker 1: a whole issue you about us arguing over women's workout

858
00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:05,759
Speaker 1: clothes for some contacts. On last one, Eric and I

859
00:38:05,800 --> 00:38:08,000
Speaker 1: saw a couple biking together in the neighborhood and he

860
00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:10,759
Speaker 1: commented that the lady was trying to get some because

861
00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:12,799
Speaker 1: she was in leggings and a crop top.

862
00:38:13,000 --> 00:38:16,200
Speaker 2: This, guys sucks, audio kind of man.

863
00:38:16,280 --> 00:38:18,319
Speaker 1: I told him she was just working out and that

864
00:38:18,440 --> 00:38:20,960
Speaker 1: the guy she was with was probably her boyfriend. Plus

865
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:23,000
Speaker 1: she was at least ten years younger than Eric. But

866
00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:25,080
Speaker 1: he just said that doesn't mean she's not trying to

867
00:38:25,080 --> 00:38:28,320
Speaker 1: get more guys with those clothes. Women only wear workout

868
00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:30,960
Speaker 1: clothes to attract men and get laid. It's definitely not

869
00:38:31,000 --> 00:38:32,080
Speaker 1: to work out. I can tell you that.

870
00:38:32,760 --> 00:38:36,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe he just thinks everyone is wearing workout clothes

871
00:38:36,080 --> 00:38:37,960
Speaker 2: to get laid. I guess he puts on a pair

872
00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:40,120
Speaker 2: of gym shorts. He's like he takes us back.

873
00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:42,560
Speaker 1: To a jim. Yeah, And I argued with him, I

874
00:38:42,680 --> 00:38:44,760
Speaker 1: just gave up what I said, if I wear workout

875
00:38:44,760 --> 00:38:47,480
Speaker 1: clothes to exercise and lose weight to be healthier, am

876
00:38:47,520 --> 00:38:48,960
Speaker 1: I trying to get a man's attention?

877
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:53,160
Speaker 2: And he said, yes, dude, that I has the worst

878
00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:54,759
Speaker 2: set of beliefs.

879
00:38:54,239 --> 00:38:56,080
Speaker 1: Of anyone, truly the worst.

880
00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:58,400
Speaker 2: But also like this is I feel like this is

881
00:38:58,440 --> 00:39:01,399
Speaker 2: a surprising amount of people that have He's kind of yeah,

882
00:39:01,880 --> 00:39:02,480
Speaker 2: not in our.

883
00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:04,920
Speaker 1: Circles, no, but like a lot of people do think this,

884
00:39:04,960 --> 00:39:07,280
Speaker 1: And I'm like, you'd get a grip. Get a grip

885
00:39:07,600 --> 00:39:10,000
Speaker 1: that was that. If there was any respect in me

886
00:39:10,080 --> 00:39:13,200
Speaker 1: left for that man, it's now completely gone. Plus he

887
00:39:13,239 --> 00:39:16,680
Speaker 1: spent the whole weekend disrespecting his wife and insulting her.

888
00:39:16,800 --> 00:39:19,080
Speaker 1: And despite how awkward I feel around her, I wish

889
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:21,120
Speaker 1: I'd known what kind of person my dad was three

890
00:39:21,200 --> 00:39:23,399
Speaker 1: years ago, so I could have told her to leave

891
00:39:23,440 --> 00:39:26,560
Speaker 1: him when she had the chance to. No woman deserves

892
00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:29,040
Speaker 1: a man as awful as my dad. Yeah, why is

893
00:39:29,080 --> 00:39:30,440
Speaker 1: this other woman putting up with him?

894
00:39:30,680 --> 00:39:33,600
Speaker 2: Maybe he shows a different side of himself to her

895
00:39:33,680 --> 00:39:34,120
Speaker 2: or something.

896
00:39:34,440 --> 00:39:36,120
Speaker 1: Doesn't sound like he has any good side And I'm

897
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:38,440
Speaker 1: sure some of you noticed what I put in the title.

898
00:39:38,680 --> 00:39:41,040
Speaker 1: I now feel like I no longer have any father

899
00:39:41,160 --> 00:39:42,520
Speaker 1: figure at all in my life.

900
00:39:43,200 --> 00:39:46,040
Speaker 2: No, the step dad, no, no, what?

901
00:39:46,480 --> 00:39:49,359
Speaker 1: And here's why. Weeks ago, I got into a little

902
00:39:49,360 --> 00:39:52,400
Speaker 1: bit of a debate with my mom about adopted kids.

903
00:39:52,640 --> 00:39:54,120
Speaker 1: I told her I didn't want to give birth as

904
00:39:54,120 --> 00:39:57,120
Speaker 1: an adult and would rather adopt. And she said I

905
00:39:57,160 --> 00:40:01,279
Speaker 1: shouldn't bring another person's dirty kids into my home. And

906
00:40:01,320 --> 00:40:03,400
Speaker 1: she said it would be hard to love grandkids that

907
00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:04,480
Speaker 1: didn't look like me.

908
00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:07,080
Speaker 2: Oh, my goshamn.

909
00:40:07,320 --> 00:40:11,360
Speaker 1: Both your parents suck. Oh that's really tough. I know

910
00:40:11,400 --> 00:40:13,680
Speaker 1: it's kind of a weird conversation for a sixteen year

911
00:40:13,719 --> 00:40:17,600
Speaker 1: old to have. I recently turned sixteen this summer. Congrats,

912
00:40:20,239 --> 00:40:22,680
Speaker 1: but it came up anyway. When I asked for my

913
00:40:22,760 --> 00:40:25,840
Speaker 1: dad's opinion, I found what is probably the real reason

914
00:40:25,880 --> 00:40:28,040
Speaker 1: he doesn't want to adopt me. He told me that

915
00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:30,520
Speaker 1: he doesn't think adopted kids can be loved the same

916
00:40:30,560 --> 00:40:35,360
Speaker 1: way as blood kids. Oh, now, the dad sucks, doe.

917
00:40:35,640 --> 00:40:38,760
Speaker 1: He said adopted children aren't as lovable. And I realized

918
00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:41,400
Speaker 1: that despite calling me his daughter and talking about me

919
00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:43,719
Speaker 1: and how much he loves me, he doesn't love me

920
00:40:43,760 --> 00:40:46,040
Speaker 1: as much as his birth kids, and also I have

921
00:40:46,120 --> 00:40:48,719
Speaker 1: lost all respect for him after this past weekend. There

922
00:40:48,760 --> 00:40:51,120
Speaker 1: was a lot of stuff that happened in my family,

923
00:40:51,320 --> 00:40:53,520
Speaker 1: and my mom tried to blind me from all of it,

924
00:40:53,680 --> 00:40:56,040
Speaker 1: so my cousins are my only source of information. I

925
00:40:56,080 --> 00:40:58,840
Speaker 1: spent the weekend with my oldest cousins, twenty one female

926
00:40:58,880 --> 00:41:02,160
Speaker 1: and another one of my female, and I ranted to

927
00:41:02,200 --> 00:41:05,279
Speaker 1: them about what my stepdad had said. After that, they

928
00:41:05,320 --> 00:41:08,600
Speaker 1: told me something that made me feel more disgusted and

929
00:41:08,680 --> 00:41:11,200
Speaker 1: betrayed more than I've ever felt.

930
00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:14,800
Speaker 2: Its just are they all awful?

931
00:41:15,920 --> 00:41:17,879
Speaker 1: But he has no adults in her life that are,

932
00:41:18,040 --> 00:41:22,400
Speaker 1: you know, good? This really sucks. My stepdad cheated on

933
00:41:22,440 --> 00:41:26,160
Speaker 1: my mom a few years back AH, and she stayed

934
00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:26,560
Speaker 1: with him.

935
00:41:26,920 --> 00:41:27,920
Speaker 2: AH.

936
00:41:27,960 --> 00:41:31,319
Speaker 1: The reason my mom divorced Eric was due to his indidelity,

937
00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:34,560
Speaker 1: but she chose to forgive my stepdad and never told

938
00:41:34,560 --> 00:41:36,680
Speaker 1: me about it, letting me continue to live with a

939
00:41:36,680 --> 00:41:39,080
Speaker 1: man who did the same thing that Eric did to her.

940
00:41:39,520 --> 00:41:42,200
Speaker 1: Eric's cheating ruined my life and I don't think I

941
00:41:42,200 --> 00:41:46,040
Speaker 1: can look at my stepdad the same way again. Damn.

942
00:41:46,120 --> 00:41:49,120
Speaker 1: Before the past weekend, I was laughing with my stepdad

943
00:41:49,160 --> 00:41:51,799
Speaker 1: and hanging out with him now. I'm glad my mom

944
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:54,160
Speaker 1: is having me spend time with my grandma because it

945
00:41:54,200 --> 00:41:56,160
Speaker 1: means I have more time to process all of this

946
00:41:56,560 --> 00:41:59,359
Speaker 1: before I have to see him again. I'm a junior

947
00:41:59,400 --> 00:42:02,560
Speaker 1: in high school. I'm planning to work harder on online jobs,

948
00:42:02,640 --> 00:42:05,760
Speaker 1: applying for scholarships, and more so so that I'm ready

949
00:42:05,760 --> 00:42:08,080
Speaker 1: to get away from all of this as soon as

950
00:42:08,080 --> 00:42:11,080
Speaker 1: I get to college. If anything else major happens, I'll

951
00:42:11,160 --> 00:42:13,680
Speaker 1: update again, but this is it for now. I know

952
00:42:13,719 --> 00:42:15,480
Speaker 1: I'm not the jerk. I'm just the one who has

953
00:42:15,560 --> 00:42:18,400
Speaker 1: to deal with a ton of unfair crap. Damn, but

954
00:42:18,480 --> 00:42:21,800
Speaker 1: you know it's not unfair. Joinings Live every weekday three PMPST.

955
00:42:22,120 --> 00:42:22,960
Speaker 1: Just tap our profile.

956
00:42:23,080 --> 00:42:23,960
Speaker 2: I'm sad.

957
00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:26,000
Speaker 1: This was really this was such a sad ending.

958
00:42:26,080 --> 00:42:29,240
Speaker 2: This end terribly, terribly. So what's her advice to ope?

959
00:42:29,480 --> 00:42:29,520
Speaker 3: Like?

960
00:42:29,680 --> 00:42:31,439
Speaker 2: It seems like everyone's deserting her.

961
00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:33,840
Speaker 1: Like I feel like you unfortunately, I mean.

962
00:42:34,239 --> 00:42:35,759
Speaker 2: But again, she's sixteen.

963
00:42:35,800 --> 00:42:39,200
Speaker 1: She's sixteen, she goes to online school. So it seems

964
00:42:39,239 --> 00:42:41,040
Speaker 1: like you said that you do have some other friends

965
00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:44,239
Speaker 1: and stuff, so I guess you know, try and rely

966
00:42:44,360 --> 00:42:45,160
Speaker 1: on those friends.

967
00:42:45,280 --> 00:42:48,400
Speaker 2: I do love you. Sucks though, because it's like she

968
00:42:48,560 --> 00:42:51,160
Speaker 2: really doesn't have any familial support. Struck.

969
00:42:51,400 --> 00:42:54,000
Speaker 1: No, literally everyone in her life has been lett.

970
00:42:53,840 --> 00:42:57,480
Speaker 2: Me like, like, I mean maybe like aunts, uncles anyway, maybe.

971
00:42:57,360 --> 00:42:59,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, if you have any extended family, I.

972
00:43:00,080 --> 00:43:02,879
Speaker 2: Mean, talking to the counselor could be good too. But yeah,

973
00:43:02,920 --> 00:43:05,560
Speaker 2: it's like, well she can't because she's on online school. Well,

974
00:43:05,600 --> 00:43:07,400
Speaker 2: but you could. You could do like an online session

975
00:43:07,440 --> 00:43:08,000
Speaker 2: with the counselor.

976
00:43:08,040 --> 00:43:11,360
Speaker 1: I think yeah, they would, the counselor unless you're unless

977
00:43:11,400 --> 00:43:13,480
Speaker 1: you tell them that your life is in danger or

978
00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:16,080
Speaker 1: you're putting someone else's life in danger. I don't think

979
00:43:16,120 --> 00:43:21,360
Speaker 1: they're allowed to tell anything to your parents. Yeah, honestly,

980
00:43:21,440 --> 00:43:23,360
Speaker 1: I feel like it's you just kind of have to

981
00:43:23,719 --> 00:43:26,640
Speaker 1: rely on your friends if you can the counselor, and

982
00:43:26,840 --> 00:43:28,400
Speaker 1: just wait until you can get to college.

983
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:32,399
Speaker 2: God, this really sucks. You know what doesn't suck?

984
00:43:32,800 --> 00:43:33,480
Speaker 1: This next story