Speaker 1: Hell, I Suck at Dating with the Nonglert and Dared
Speaker 1: Haven and I heard radio podcast What's going on? Everyone?
Speaker 1: Welcome to an all new episode of Help I Suck
Speaker 1: at Dating? Uh, and I wish you know. Every time
Speaker 1: we start these episodes, I say we've got a great
Speaker 1: episode in the store for us, We've got something going
Speaker 1: on with Jared, we got a great guest, and well
Speaker 1: we do have a great guest. Today I can't confidently
Speaker 1: say that we're gonna have a great episode. And the
Speaker 1: reason is, uh, it's just me by myself. There's no
Speaker 1: more ARC or Eastern to fall back on. Riley is
Speaker 1: here as she usually is, but I don't know um
Speaker 1: of her interest in being involved regularly in this episode,
Speaker 1: So it's true. I guess it's gonna be me talking
Speaker 1: about whatever comes to my mind. But before we uh
Speaker 1: get into whatever I want to talk about, I do
Speaker 1: want to let you guys know we have Vanessa in
Speaker 1: a rusion us from the new dating show, The Armenian
Speaker 1: Dating Show, which is actually kind of funny to say that.
Speaker 1: But she'll be joining us a little bit later after
Speaker 1: the first break. Um, so just if you're interested in that,
Speaker 1: stick around for that but I guess I can update
Speaker 1: you guys on where I am. So right now I
Speaker 1: am in uh Nashville, Tennessee, because tomorrow is well as
Speaker 1: of I guess this recording being aired yesterday was Ben
Speaker 1: and Justice wedding here in Nashville. So there's a bunch
Speaker 1: of us out here. Kaylin, Nick, Natalie, and myself are
Speaker 1: all staying in a nice little house near downtown Nashville.
Speaker 1: Nick was actually supposed to guest host this episode with me,
Speaker 1: but there are some small fears that I might have COVID,
Speaker 1: but that's not confirmed. It's also not tonight. I uh so,
Speaker 1: I've been doing a lot of like renovating of our
Speaker 1: house in Las Vegas, and I inhaled a lot of
Speaker 1: saw us and I wasn't wearing a mask, and I
Speaker 1: was like standing and cutting and doing a bunch of
Speaker 1: stuff with wood, and I think I inhaled a lot
Speaker 1: of sawdust. And so my sinuses are really really messed
Speaker 1: up right now, like they're clogged. I can't really breathe
Speaker 1: through my nose very well. It's got a little bit better, actually,
Speaker 1: but that's why it's just me hosting today. Jared is
Speaker 1: in Mexico at his best friend's wedding. I think he's
Speaker 1: a groomsman. He actually was going to come on today
Speaker 1: and I said, no, Jared, you can take the day
Speaker 1: off because Nick and I are going to co host,
Speaker 1: and then right before we started go hosting rightfully, so
Speaker 1: Nick was like, yeah, maybe I don't think I want
Speaker 1: to do that anymore. So here I am just rambling
Speaker 1: and rambling on. I'm gonna go into our hot topics
Speaker 1: here because I don't really know what else to talk about. Honestly, Riley,
Speaker 1: do you want to jump in on this podcast with me?
Speaker 1: Because I feel just weird talking and talking and talking.
Speaker 1: I'm happy to jump on with you, and I think
Speaker 1: you're doing a great job. Oh thanks, Well, I need
Speaker 1: you here, so I appreciate you joining me. Um rally,
Speaker 1: Before we jump into the hot topics, can you just
Speaker 1: give us an update on where your parents are since
Speaker 1: the last time we talked to them. Um, my parents
Speaker 1: are still traveling around and living their lives and having fun. Um,
Speaker 1: they're so excited about what they're doing and um, you know,
Speaker 1: this new stage in their life. So they're just careless
Speaker 1: and worry free. And their YouTube video is still going
Speaker 1: strong or their YouTube channel they're going strong. Yep. Have
Speaker 1: you been featured on the YouTube channel yet? I have not. Um,
Speaker 1: I know my brother for sure does not want anything
Speaker 1: to do with it, a little more open to it,
Speaker 1: but I think I want them to, you know, have
Speaker 1: the spotlight and do what they want to do. So
Speaker 1: but if they'd like me too, I'm happy to that's
Speaker 1: nice to you. Are you gonna be asking them for Thanksgiving?
Speaker 1: I am. We are actually going out this weekend to
Speaker 1: visit my grandparents and do an early Thanksgiving with them.
Speaker 1: So where's that palm springs? Oh? Nice palm springs. That's
Speaker 1: exactly what I think about when I think about that Thanksgiving. Yes,
Speaker 1: nice and warm? Nice and warm? Um. All right, Riley, Well,
Speaker 1: so you and I thank you for again jumping in
Speaker 1: and coasting this podcast with me because we all know
Speaker 1: how much I struggled to do things on my own. Um. So,
Speaker 1: the hot topics that we have today, there are five
Speaker 1: big big red flash to look out for wild dating,
Speaker 1: according to our relationship expert, and I want to go
Speaker 1: through all five of those with you. Is that okay?
Speaker 1: And I also want to talk about whether you've experiencing
Speaker 1: these or not, because I'm sure at some point in
Speaker 1: another we have either experienced that aren't done them ourselves.
Speaker 1: So the first one is, uh, they want you to
Speaker 1: move too fast as a couple, and I feel like
Speaker 1: this is typically um, well, actually no, I guess I
Speaker 1: was gonna say this typically is women experiencing it, but
Speaker 1: I bet you it probably goes both ways. So have
Speaker 1: you ever been like dating someone and then they wanted
Speaker 1: to progress their relationship too quickly and you're like turned
Speaker 1: off by it? Definitely? I think you know, it wasn't
Speaker 1: so much just a relationship they want to progress, but
Speaker 1: they like talk to me right off the bat like
Speaker 1: we were in a relationship, you know, like meeting somebody
Speaker 1: for the first time. They were always they were like
Speaker 1: quick to just like pet names like baby and stuff
Speaker 1: like that. And I was like, yeah, yeah, I think
Speaker 1: that's definitely a reflect too. I Um, I've I've had
Speaker 1: to go both ways. I've been like, I guess it's
Speaker 1: hard not to like, like, let's say you have like
Speaker 1: a great night with someone, right and you guys like
Speaker 1: hang out, um, and you're hanging out the next day
Speaker 1: and like you are just like lovey dovey, holding hands
Speaker 1: kissing in public like that kind of stuff. I feel
Speaker 1: like that can sometimes be um easy, but I feel
Speaker 1: like there are a lot of occasions where you're right,
Speaker 1: like you're talking to someone too for not very long,
Speaker 1: and then they start like turning it on the way
Speaker 1: too much and calling you baby, and like, oh, that's
Speaker 1: kind of aggress I guess I'm trying to think, like,
Speaker 1: I don't know if I've ever experienced that personally though,
Speaker 1: I feel like, especially from the Bachelor show that happened,
Speaker 1: it is pretty frequently like people fall in love and
Speaker 1: less than a a week, But personally, like, outside of
Speaker 1: my show experience, I can't think I've ever had that happen.
Speaker 1: Have you found yourself talking too soon, like saying things
Speaker 1: that you normally wouldn't Well, my brain is musch again.
Speaker 1: I want to remind you that, um, have I ever
Speaker 1: done that? I mean, I want to say no, but
Speaker 1: the answer is probably yes, Like at some point or another,
Speaker 1: I'm sure I had done something very ridiculous like that.
Speaker 1: I think. I think even if I was really into someone, though,
Speaker 1: I would always try to slow play it to the
Speaker 1: best of my ability. Um, So maybe not so much.
Speaker 1: But I don't know. That's a hard question to ask
Speaker 1: to answer because as uh, you obviously know, it's like
Speaker 1: it's hard to recall every every moment of every dating
Speaker 1: experience you've ever had in your entire life. But we're
Speaker 1: gonna be move on the next one because that one's tricky.
Speaker 1: So that's the number one is they want you to
Speaker 1: move too fast as a couple. Um. Number two is
Speaker 1: they only communicate via text or social media. And I
Speaker 1: have definitely been involved with people that are like this,
Speaker 1: and I wonder, I wonder why it is too. I
Speaker 1: think that there are well, there's obviously like the cat
Speaker 1: fishing purposes, right, like they don't want to talk on
Speaker 1: the phone because they're worried about like their voice, or
Speaker 1: they don't want to meet in person because they don't
Speaker 1: want you to see what they actually look like. So
Speaker 1: I think there's a lot of issues that surround that, um.
Speaker 1: But I think that even even beyond that, like let's
Speaker 1: say you have met them in person and you don't
Speaker 1: know exactly who they are and they still only want
Speaker 1: to text or they still only want to like chat
Speaker 1: on social media, I think that can be a bit
Speaker 1: of a red flag too, because it's like, well, like,
Speaker 1: why is this your only form of communication? I'm recalling
Speaker 1: like one person in particular that like I feel like
Speaker 1: she was like dating like maybe like five other guys
Speaker 1: at the time, and that's why that was like her
Speaker 1: way of keeping everything organized was by texting full time
Speaker 1: instead of talking on the phone. So that's why that's
Speaker 1: like what I related to. But that definitely is a
Speaker 1: red flag. Have you ever experienced that where someone never
Speaker 1: wants to call or meet in person or anything like that,
Speaker 1: especially being on dating apps, Like people don't want to
Speaker 1: get off dating apps most of the time. They just
Speaker 1: want to stick there and they know we had we
Speaker 1: had that guest not too long ago. That made that
Speaker 1: good point too. There's like a rule where it's like
Speaker 1: after a week or two weeks, if they haven't asked
Speaker 1: you to like move from the app to like get
Speaker 1: your phone number or something like that, then it's just
Speaker 1: time to give up on it because they're taking too long.
Speaker 1: And I agree with that. I think a lot of
Speaker 1: people just like to like sit on their on their
Speaker 1: hands and twidet of the thumbs and now one of
Speaker 1: the next thing, um this one actually kind of it
Speaker 1: is ironic to me because not ironic, but timely. Number
Speaker 1: three is they trash talk their X. And the reason
Speaker 1: I say it's timely is because Caitlin and I were
Speaker 1: actually just talking about this last night. I feel like
Speaker 1: I got under a lot of uh scrutiny for doing
Speaker 1: the opposite of that, for talking highly of my ax,
Speaker 1: who is now on Clayton's season. So uh, I guess
Speaker 1: they're both red flags. You don't want to talk trash
Speaker 1: about your ex and you don't want talk highlight about
Speaker 1: your ex, because either way you're going to um be
Speaker 1: in red flag there. All right, we gotta guests waiting
Speaker 1: in the waiting. Um, So I'm just gonna go through
Speaker 1: these last two real quick. They just got out of
Speaker 1: a relationship. That's not really a red flag to me.
Speaker 1: That just means bad timing, I guess. Or number five,
Speaker 1: they got drunk on the first date, also not a
Speaker 1: red flag to me, um, because getting drunk on the
Speaker 1: first date is a great way to take the edge off. UM. Okay, Well,
Speaker 1: we're gonna take a quick break and we're gonna get
Speaker 1: to our guests. Stay tuned through the break, we'll be
Speaker 1: it back. All right, everybody, welcome back to help I
Speaker 1: suck at dating. And I know I promised to have
Speaker 1: Vanessa here joining me, but I actually I'm gonna do
Speaker 1: you guys one better. I have Vanessa and Natasha joining
Speaker 1: us from the Armenian Dating Show. UM, how are you guys?
Speaker 1: Thank you so much? Thanks, I'm great, Thanks for asking,
Speaker 1: Thanks so much for joining. UM. I appreciate you guys
Speaker 1: joining the episode of how by Second Dating. So I
Speaker 1: I just gotta ask because I've never really heard of
Speaker 1: the Armenian Dating Show, so I just need to know
Speaker 1: all about it. Can you start from the finish or
Speaker 1: start from the beginning and go all the way to
Speaker 1: the end for me? Like what it's about? What? What
Speaker 1: can we expected for watching all that kind of stuff? UM? Basically,
Speaker 1: it is the brainchild of our amazing producer, Anthony Abocci
Speaker 1: and the production team that he founded Mia Seen UM
Speaker 1: And it's an unscripted show that basically, over ten episodes,
Speaker 1: serializes what it's like to date UM as an Armenian
Speaker 1: in l a UM, the struggles of it all while
Speaker 1: still trying to like be connected to our roots and
Speaker 1: our culture and our heritage and all of that. And
Speaker 1: you know basically how much we also suck at dating?
Speaker 1: So are we gonna see something of that? We we
Speaker 1: gotta see you guys dating on the show then obviously
Speaker 1: mm hmmmm. And there's there's a little twist to it.
Speaker 1: So before the main singles go out on their dates,
Speaker 1: they're eates have to meet their families first. How can
Speaker 1: I forget that? That was the big like surprise? Why
Speaker 1: is that? Is? It? Is family super important in Armenian
Speaker 1: dating culture? Is that why? Yeah? Definitely? I don't think
Speaker 1: Natasha and I a lot of people like our friends,
Speaker 1: we wouldn't date people who are not very family oriented.
Speaker 1: Like our family is our foundation, it's our bedrock. They
Speaker 1: are biggest support system and our biggest critics. Um mainly
Speaker 1: our critics, but you know we um. Basically the whole
Speaker 1: point of it is that they meet our friends and
Speaker 1: family before they meet us, and and just how stressful
Speaker 1: that is because I personally have never had anyone meet
Speaker 1: my friends or family anyone that I've dated, so it
Speaker 1: was very like anxiety inducing for me. Well wait, I
Speaker 1: gotta I gotta stop here there then, So if if
Speaker 1: it's so important, why have you never had anyone meets
Speaker 1: your family or friends before? Now? Because no one made
Speaker 1: the cut the important enough that it was just that
Speaker 1: they weren't important enough exactly. I think it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: there's a big emotional burden involved with having someone meet
Speaker 1: the people that matter to you the most, and I
Speaker 1: just never really thought anyone that I dated met my
Speaker 1: family and friends standards. So sorry. So then this was
Speaker 1: a major twist for you. Then, rather than going from
Speaker 1: someone never meeting your parents and your family, uh, to
Speaker 1: then meeting them before you even get so you you
Speaker 1: haven't even had a chance to meet these people, right,
Speaker 1: they go through the ringer with the family first. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's basically like they meet my friends and family, and
Speaker 1: then I'm sitting on a blind date with these guys.
Speaker 1: I have no idea what they look like or anything,
Speaker 1: and they're talking to me about my parents, like, oh
Speaker 1: your mom's though, who your dad's like this? Your friends
Speaker 1: were asking crazy questions and I'm like, how is this happening? Natasha?
Speaker 1: What was your experience like with it too? Are you
Speaker 1: stressed out with them meeting your family before? So my
Speaker 1: experience is different than van Usas because I'm not a
Speaker 1: main single so I had to meet the guy's parents
Speaker 1: that I went on a date. Oh great, So we
Speaker 1: get both sides of it. Then, so what was that
Speaker 1: like then walking in to meet them. I mean, it's
Speaker 1: interesting because you learn a lot about that person, like
Speaker 1: through someone else's eyes. But to be fair, I feel
Speaker 1: like the families are going to only put, you know,
Speaker 1: the good stuff out there. I tried to get some
Speaker 1: some gossip or like embarrassing stuff out, but they were very,
Speaker 1: very protective on revealing any of that information. So yeah,
Speaker 1: just like hearing all the good things about this person
Speaker 1: and like I guess, like getting excited without meeting them.
Speaker 1: Yet it doesn't kind of go both ways. Like let's
Speaker 1: say you walk in to meet some guys family and
Speaker 1: you like, don't mesh well with the family, right, And
Speaker 1: then what if they're like, we really like you, we
Speaker 1: want you to meet our son, and then in your
Speaker 1: back of your head, you're like, well, I don't even
Speaker 1: know if I want to meet your son. Now did
Speaker 1: that ever happen at all? Um? I mean I can't
Speaker 1: say on the show, but I never had to do that,
Speaker 1: So no, that hasn't that happened in my life before.
Speaker 1: But yess you'll just have to watch the show to see.
Speaker 1: And I don't think, like, as a rule of thumb,
Speaker 1: I don't think Natasha and I are like willing to
Speaker 1: meet people's friends and family before we meet them moving forward.
Speaker 1: It was it was a one, one time experiment, maybe
Speaker 1: not gonna happen again. Before before having done the Armenian
Speaker 1: Dating Show, had you guys ever been on like a
Speaker 1: blind date or anything like that? I have been on
Speaker 1: a blind date once and I told myself never again.
Speaker 1: It was that bad. What was the first blind date? Like?
Speaker 1: Was it was just that bad that you decided you
Speaker 1: never wanted to give it a shot. So this is
Speaker 1: gonna sound very shallow. I'm not a shallow person, Like,
Speaker 1: I've attracted to a lot more things than looks. That's
Speaker 1: actually like the bottom of the radar. But this person
Speaker 1: just looked twice my age um at the time, and
Speaker 1: I was not down with that. But also some of
Speaker 1: the values that spoke about. I was like, yeah, this
Speaker 1: is not gonna work right. But it was an okay date,
Speaker 1: like it went smooth but totally. But I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: but what about you? Had you ever been on a
Speaker 1: blind date? Before the show? Um? I joke with my
Speaker 1: friends that I've been on a blind dat because I
Speaker 1: swear to god, I feel like I was catfished once,
Speaker 1: like this guy was not using like current photos of himself.
Speaker 1: I was at the bar, like where is so you
Speaker 1: where it? But you know, I mean, it's a dangerous
Speaker 1: world out there with online dating, and I felt like
Speaker 1: I have done such a crappy job picking them myself
Speaker 1: that maybe I should just put in the hands of
Speaker 1: someone else. I mean, can't get much worse. Yeah, So
Speaker 1: can you guys here a little bit more? I know
Speaker 1: you said you're Armenian. Dating is very family oriented and
Speaker 1: you're you know, everyone's kind of involved in the process.
Speaker 1: But can you guys kind of like compare and contrast
Speaker 1: or like share maybe, like what's unique about Armenian dating
Speaker 1: culture more so than just like the family, Like is
Speaker 1: there anything us beyond that? I mean, like for me,
Speaker 1: it's just everything in one so like knowing the language
Speaker 1: and like the culture, the traditions, the holidays and just
Speaker 1: like having the appreciation for that. Um, I guess that
Speaker 1: doesn't necessarily mean that they have to be Armenian, like
Speaker 1: I think, I mean myself. I don't know if I
Speaker 1: speak on finesss we have, but like are are open
Speaker 1: to non Armians, but as as long as the respect
Speaker 1: for the culture is there Um, I know a handful
Speaker 1: of people who you know, are not Armian and love
Speaker 1: our culture and almost seem more Armenian than I am
Speaker 1: sometimes because they're surrounded by like so many other friends
Speaker 1: and um that are Yeah. I think just having it's
Speaker 1: just easier. I guess if it's easier to have someone
Speaker 1: who understands like the mannerisms of your family and like
Speaker 1: just the way things are and like the strictness or
Speaker 1: like the you know, just the different culture is traditions
Speaker 1: and like practices that that um with being Armian. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and you know, someone you can talk crap about in
Speaker 1: the same language about other people is always apt. I
Speaker 1: mean yeah for me personally, like my my parents they're
Speaker 1: both Armenian but completely opposite experiences, Like my dad is
Speaker 1: third generation Armyian born in America and my mom is
Speaker 1: arming and born in Syria, So like my dad doesn't
Speaker 1: read write anything like that. And I think assimilation was
Speaker 1: like a really big fear for them with you know,
Speaker 1: me and my siblings, so they really instilled from like
Speaker 1: day one, you've got to be with an army, and
Speaker 1: you've got to be with an army, and and like
Speaker 1: a true rebellious teenager you know, twenty year old in college,
Speaker 1: I was like, screw you guys, I'm gonna date whatever
Speaker 1: I want. And then as I got older, I was like,
Speaker 1: it is just a little bit easier, you know. And
Speaker 1: I'm not I'm not closed off to being or dating
Speaker 1: a non Army and but I think it's just my
Speaker 1: preference and um, you know, so we'll just see if
Speaker 1: if he's out there. Yeah, well in Vanessa to your
Speaker 1: point too, I remember, um, many many many years ago,
Speaker 1: I was dating this this French girl and she uh
Speaker 1: like introduced me to her family and whenever I was around,
Speaker 1: I was I would always like beg them. I was like,
Speaker 1: please don't speak French when I'm around, because I feel
Speaker 1: like you're talking crap about me behind my back because
Speaker 1: I can't understand anything you're saying. So it must be
Speaker 1: nice to be able to talk crap to people in
Speaker 1: Armenian that might not be able to understand what's going on. Um. So,
Speaker 1: so both of your dating histories then it's been mostly Armenian. Right.
Speaker 1: Have you guys tried dating other cultures and it just
Speaker 1: wasn't um what you wanted or have you guys just
Speaker 1: basically strictly stuck to dating other Armenians. I'd safe. For me,
Speaker 1: it was it's mainly been Armenians. I've been on dates
Speaker 1: with non Armenians as well, and I think ultimately like
Speaker 1: we didn't connect for other reasons as well. I don't
Speaker 1: think it was just the fact that he wasn't Armenian,
Speaker 1: but I think now I just kind of like I
Speaker 1: look and I swee, and I'm like, is that an
Speaker 1: Armanian name or not? Like, oh, look at the pictures
Speaker 1: and try to figure out going on because like I
Speaker 1: don't have an Armyian name. I don't I've been told
Speaker 1: I don't really look Armenians, so I you know, I
Speaker 1: had to like add like an Armenian flag in my profile.
Speaker 1: I don't know it. For me, it's it's mainly been Armenians,
Speaker 1: and trust me, that's come with its own baggage of
Speaker 1: like you know, kissing frogs. They're not all great either,
Speaker 1: but I'm sure Natalka can relate it. Well. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: would say mine is like I'm definitely open to dating
Speaker 1: non Armenians, but for the long run, ideally I would
Speaker 1: like to marry on an Armenian. But of course, like
Speaker 1: if someone else comes along, then I'm like, Okay, you're
Speaker 1: an amazing person. You treat me well, like you respect
Speaker 1: me and my family, and like we get along and
Speaker 1: it just works. Then I wouldn't necessarily say no, but yeah,
Speaker 1: ideally I would. I want to end up with an Armenian.
Speaker 1: But I'm not opposed to dating and honor. What is
Speaker 1: what is Armanian culture in Los Angeles? Like, like, obviously
Speaker 1: it's it's Americanized to a degree, but is it still
Speaker 1: pretty culturally representative of back in Armenia. Um? Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's true. Like are you in the valley, are you
Speaker 1: in Glendell, are you in like Los Angeles? Um? I
Speaker 1: mean we both went to private Armyian schools, so we
Speaker 1: were very much in that community and like we grew
Speaker 1: up with that. But if you are an Armenian that
Speaker 1: wasn't necessarily like part of an Armenian school or like
Speaker 1: an Armenian organization, then I guess you might not be
Speaker 1: as ingraining culture or like know as many people in
Speaker 1: the community. But I think that's mostly I would say
Speaker 1: up to the parents to decide like how involved want
Speaker 1: their kids to be, right, Yeah, And I'd say even
Speaker 1: I mean, I think the beauty of this show as
Speaker 1: well as kind of how much it highlights how many
Speaker 1: like eclectic, different types of our means there are. That
Speaker 1: we're not like this monolithic idea like every other ethnic group.
Speaker 1: We're not all the Kardashians were not everything that you
Speaker 1: see in Glendale. We're not you know where. There's so
Speaker 1: many different facets to us, and that's the beauty of
Speaker 1: it all. Like we're not a complete picture without having
Speaker 1: the you know, maybe a little bit more fresh off
Speaker 1: the boat arm means. We're not a complete picture without
Speaker 1: some of the army means who don't speak the language
Speaker 1: or anything but identify as that. And um, you know,
Speaker 1: it's just it does depend on different areas of l a.
Speaker 1: But ultimately, everyone tells a beautiful story about being ar
Speaker 1: mean and it's unique to them and and we should
Speaker 1: all respect that. Yeah, absolutely, that's beautifully said. Okay, So
Speaker 1: the show premiers on YouTube on November I believe, right.
Speaker 1: So have you guys been able to see the episodes yet?
Speaker 1: Are you nervous about what it holds or I haven't
Speaker 1: seen them yet? Were it on the day before the
Speaker 1: night before? Okay, And we're your nerves right now? Are
Speaker 1: you guys? Nervous. Oh my god. Yeah, especially personally because
Speaker 1: I've been told I don't hide emotion on my face,
Speaker 1: which I thought I was like a you know, a
Speaker 1: bluffing expert. But um, now it has come to my
Speaker 1: attention that I'm like like like and everything is read
Speaker 1: in my face. So that's problematic. I mean, it premiers November,
Speaker 1: and I'm pretty sure it's the end of my dating
Speaker 1: life November. So well, let's just open that by the
Speaker 1: end of the show that means you found your future husband,
Speaker 1: or that I have locked myself into my house because
Speaker 1: I can't go out anymore. No, I think you'll be fine,
Speaker 1: do you? So I guess on that note, then do
Speaker 1: you have any regrets that maybe you would change if
Speaker 1: you go back and change time with the show or
Speaker 1: in life? The loaded question. We'll keep it, We'll keep
Speaker 1: it more more topical with just the show. Then, Okay,
Speaker 1: I don't regret doing it at all. I think it
Speaker 1: was a really great experience and honestly, like the crew
Speaker 1: was so fun to be with, so like everything else aside, Like,
Speaker 1: you know, I think we both just met a lot
Speaker 1: of really fun and cool people that we would ties
Speaker 1: with in the future. Um, Yeah, it was. It was
Speaker 1: a very something, very different and out of the box,
Speaker 1: and this is the first time that a show like
Speaker 1: this exists, so it's kind of cool to be the
Speaker 1: the pavers of the way. Yeah, I mean I I didn't.
Speaker 1: I was worried initially that like this whole thing was
Speaker 1: a mail order bride situation. I was like, what am
Speaker 1: I getting yourself into? Um? But you know, in talking
Speaker 1: to the producers and the director and everyone, and just
Speaker 1: how much time they spent into getting to know me,
Speaker 1: getting to know um my likes, my dislikes, what I
Speaker 1: am looking for in someone. I thought to myself, like,
Speaker 1: if they spend half this much time with interviewing the candidates,
Speaker 1: like I'll be okay. If nothing else, they'll behalf decent.
Speaker 1: So yeah, I have no regrets with doing the show.
Speaker 1: I made great friends along the way, great experiences. Um
Speaker 1: complicated love stories now, but people will have to watch
Speaker 1: and see hopefully a successful one at the end of
Speaker 1: the day. That did you do? Did you know each
Speaker 1: other before going on the show? No, we did not.
Speaker 1: We were united because of this podcast and then we
Speaker 1: actually met in person last week so that we can,
Speaker 1: you know, vibe together. What the other person is, and
Speaker 1: we're not just like an imaginary figure. And like she said,
Speaker 1: Popoth went to army in private schools and are a
Speaker 1: couple of years apart and never met each other. So
Speaker 1: so on the show, do we gonna watch you guys
Speaker 1: form friendships or is it mostly just like dating stuff? No,
Speaker 1: it's separate. So like you know, no one meets on
Speaker 1: the show except for like the people they're dating or
Speaker 1: going on dates with. So yeah, we we hadn't seen
Speaker 1: each other until literally last week. How come we don't
Speaker 1: see any, if at all, Armenian representation on The Bachelor.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know. I have a phone
Speaker 1: to pick with my boss because he's the president of
Speaker 1: AB two. So I'm gonna need to get up in there. Heck,
Speaker 1: yeah you do. We gotta start seeing some more of that.
Speaker 1: I would you guys be Would you guys go on
Speaker 1: the show if you were single and interested? No, I
Speaker 1: can't do it. I give you guys all so much
Speaker 1: credit for every contestant that has ever part took in
Speaker 1: The Bachelor, the Bachelorette like that is Oh, I mean
Speaker 1: it's you know, a national globe. There's a fan base
Speaker 1: everywhere for it. I mean, we will only be seen
Speaker 1: by like I don't know, I don't know. Talking about
Speaker 1: what I keep hearing, it sounds like it's gonna be
Speaker 1: a hit. So yeah, I mean I there definitely should be.
Speaker 1: But I think all arming and women are just a
Speaker 1: little bit more like I don't want to be pegged
Speaker 1: as like the villain or the this person or the that.
Speaker 1: So maybe, look, if things don't work out for me,
Speaker 1: maybe I'll be on it next season. I'll just yeah,
Speaker 1: well hopefully next season. If you do decide to go
Speaker 1: on it. It's not some vanilla white red bachelor that
Speaker 1: isn't your family is not gonna like you know, I
Speaker 1: think that's a big part of it, right, right, that's
Speaker 1: a big part of it too. All right, well, guys,
Speaker 1: before I let you go, is there anything you can
Speaker 1: tease for us before the series premiere is on November
Speaker 1: fift Like, what can we expect to see? Oh, there
Speaker 1: there is a surprise in there. I will say that
Speaker 1: you probably won't expect. Um. I don't know. I feel
Speaker 1: like we can't give away anything. There really isn't anything
Speaker 1: that we can give away other than the fact that
Speaker 1: like it's truly you know, if you like saying like
Speaker 1: there's these painful attempts of like small banter and whatnot,
Speaker 1: Like it's just so like some of the dates are
Speaker 1: just absolute cringe worthy and it's like you love to
Speaker 1: watch a train wrecks. Therefore, you like we're talking like
Speaker 1: like awkward. Yeah, oh yeah, yeah yeah, I think we
Speaker 1: both experienced like an awkward date where just like, what
Speaker 1: was this happening? You're on camera? Just smile if they
Speaker 1: put those cuts in there, though, I'm sure they will
Speaker 1: incorporate some. I will say it's very it's very real
Speaker 1: and raw, like it's it's unscripted and like just a
Speaker 1: very natural, like um happening of of dating. So um, yeah,
Speaker 1: I guess I'll say that it's like more of a
Speaker 1: documentary than a reality or entertainment. Yeah, you know, do
Speaker 1: you know how they're going to roll out the episodes.
Speaker 1: It's going to be all the episodes at once or
Speaker 1: is it going to be like weekly or so the
Speaker 1: first two episodes are going to be released on Monday, November,
Speaker 1: and then after that it's one episode every Thursday and Monday,
Speaker 1: and there's ten episodes and sometime in December, so we
Speaker 1: got four weeks of our media and dating show to
Speaker 1: look forward to on YouTube. Let's yeah, we're ready, I'm stuck. Well,
Speaker 1: thank you guys so much for joining us. We appreciate it. Um,
Speaker 1: I'm excited to watch you guys love story unfold again.
Speaker 1: It's premiering on YouTube November. First two episodes, Uh right,
Speaker 1: first week and then every Thursday and Sunday after that. Um, Monday,
Speaker 1: Oh my mistake. I appreciate you that. Um. Well, thank
Speaker 1: you guys so much for joining us. Best of luck
Speaker 1: with everything, and I can't wait to watch. Thanks thanks
Speaker 1: for having us. Yeah of course, yeah, al right, everybody,
Speaker 1: welcome back to help I suck at dating. And it's
Speaker 1: time for my favorite segment. And although we don't have
Speaker 1: Jared here, we don't have Mark here, and we don't
Speaker 1: have Eastern here, we do have Hannah here. So she
Speaker 1: is going to very kindly read these emails for us.
Speaker 1: And funny enough, Hannah, the first email is from a Hannah.
Speaker 1: Why is that funny enough? That's not even my name?
Speaker 1: Similar enough, you have every letter, every letter of your
Speaker 1: name is in her name. She just has a couple extrass,
Speaker 1: that's true. I do respond to both. But this email
Speaker 1: is from Hannah, not Hannah, and Hannah says, I've been
Speaker 1: dating my boyfriend for a little under two years. Thinking
Speaker 1: back to the first six months of our relationship, I
Speaker 1: could cry of how happily in love I was, and
Speaker 1: I envy it so much. It breaks my heart to
Speaker 1: think that I am no longer in love with him.
Speaker 1: I find myself fantasizing about other guys all the time.
Speaker 1: I get annoyed at every little thing he does, and
Speaker 1: I don't get excited to talk to him anymore. Is
Speaker 1: this normal and long term relationships? I know the honeymoon
Speaker 1: phase doesn't last forever, but I'm also twenty four years old.
Speaker 1: Aren't I too young not to get betterflies and to
Speaker 1: not be obsessed with my man? Oh? I, well, I
Speaker 1: think this is actually more appropriate, fat answer, because you
Speaker 1: were right around the same age and you have a
Speaker 1: boyfriend who you still seem very much in love with.
Speaker 1: So can you? I mean again, you don't have to,
Speaker 1: but would you be willing to share your experience with
Speaker 1: boyfriend and how in love with him you still are? Yeah?
Speaker 1: So I met um Trevor when I was seventeen. I'm
Speaker 1: now twenty two, so we've been dating for a little
Speaker 1: over four years now, we've had a couple of breaks
Speaker 1: here and there. Um, But I definitely think that that
Speaker 1: is a bad sign Hannah. Um, I still get excited
Speaker 1: to talk to him every time. Um, I'm on the
Speaker 1: phone with him or I see him. I still obviously
Speaker 1: get butterflies. Um. I totally get what she's saying about
Speaker 1: the honeymoon phase, like that excitement and kind of the
Speaker 1: jitter that I don't know, you know, that feeling when
Speaker 1: you first start meeting someone and you're like getting to
Speaker 1: know them and you kind of are so giddy all
Speaker 1: the time. That definitely goes away and fades. But the
Speaker 1: butterflies and the excitement I don't think should ever go away.
Speaker 1: At least it hasn't for me, And I think if
Speaker 1: it did go away, then I would start to get
Speaker 1: a little bit worried and a doubt if we should
Speaker 1: even be together. Well, speaking from someone that maybe has
Speaker 1: a little bit more time under his belt, I will
Speaker 1: say a little more cynically here that I do think
Speaker 1: that those things tend to fade after a while, and
Speaker 1: it's not necessarily a bad thing. I just think, you huh,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say this, but I don't want it to
Speaker 1: come across this condescending. So I just think that you
Speaker 1: just become a little bit more like emotionally mature and
Speaker 1: like in tune with your emotions the older you get.
Speaker 1: And I'm gonna go ahead on record and say, Hannah,
Speaker 1: I'm sure you're more emotionally mature than I am as
Speaker 1: a twenty two year old versus my thirty years old.
Speaker 1: But I think it's just a matter of like learning
Speaker 1: more about yourself personally as you age. So for me,
Speaker 1: for instance, I used to get the butterflies all the time, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, all of those lovey dovey feelings that you get.
Speaker 1: And the older I got the like, the less I
Speaker 1: got them. And I do love Caitlin dearly, but I
Speaker 1: mean I don't get like butterflies all that often. Um,
Speaker 1: but I would still, you know, do whatever I needed
Speaker 1: to do for her, and I make sure that she
Speaker 1: knows that I love her as often as I possibly can.
Speaker 1: And I think that I'm now I'm more in love
Speaker 1: with Caitlin and I have ever been in love with anyone,
Speaker 1: even though I don't get those butterflies or like that
Speaker 1: random excitement every once in a while, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. So I do agree with what you're saying.
Speaker 1: I don't think it's necessarily a good thing that you
Speaker 1: had them and you lost them. But I also just
Speaker 1: think that twenty four is very young, um, and twenty
Speaker 1: two is you know, again, this isn't for you obviously,
Speaker 1: because you're still very happily in love with your boyfriend, UM,
Speaker 1: but twenty four, hand is very young for you. So
Speaker 1: it's like it seems like like maybe the relationship could
Speaker 1: be over, but like you still have so much like
Speaker 1: learning to do for yourself about yourself and whether that's
Speaker 1: gonna be with your current boyfriend or with someone else.
Speaker 1: Like I I feel like it's just natural for that
Speaker 1: to happen, because like the butterflies that you were getting
Speaker 1: when you were twenty two are different because you're not
Speaker 1: the same person that you were when you were twenty
Speaker 1: two because you're twenty four now. So all that to say,
Speaker 1: I don't think it's the reason to throw away your relationship,
Speaker 1: but if you're fantasizing about other guys, like, that's definitely
Speaker 1: a red flag and that's definitely something that you should
Speaker 1: like look into a little bit, because I'm sure if
Speaker 1: you told him that he would be really bummed out
Speaker 1: by it, um, and I'm sure you feel guilty for
Speaker 1: even having those those thoughts. So that's my that's my
Speaker 1: take on it. You're not too young to get butterflies,
Speaker 1: or your question was, aren't I too young to not
Speaker 1: get butterflies and be obsessed with my man? You can
Speaker 1: be obsessed like I'm obsessed with Kalin. I don't get
Speaker 1: replies whenever every time I see her, but I'm still
Speaker 1: obsessed with her, And I bet you should probably go
Speaker 1: as far as to say the same thing about me.
Speaker 1: So as long as you love the person and as
Speaker 1: long as you're happy with the person, I think that's
Speaker 1: more important than constantly getting butterflies and doing all those things.
Speaker 1: But that's just my take. I do think having thoughts
Speaker 1: and finding other people attractive when you're in a relationship
Speaker 1: is totally normal, and it kind of is like a
Speaker 1: good indication, Like if I find someone else attractive or
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, like whatever, I'm like having like good
Speaker 1: thoughts or something about someone else, then that's healthy because
Speaker 1: at the end of the day, I still choose to
Speaker 1: be with my boyfriend, but I never find myself ever fantasizing.
Speaker 1: I think that's where it crosses the line. Like I'd
Speaker 1: be really scared if I was just sitting on my
Speaker 1: couch fantasizing about other people and I was in a relationship,
Speaker 1: I'd be like, probably shouldn't be in this relationship then, right. Well,
Speaker 1: you know you make a good point too. I think
Speaker 1: that because Caitlin and I do that all the time too.
Speaker 1: We're like, oh, that person is really attractive, like that
Speaker 1: person is really hard, that person is really handsome or
Speaker 1: pretty or whatever. Um. And I think that is healthy
Speaker 1: because it's just a basically an observation. But yeah, you're
Speaker 1: at the second he's like start to fantasize about that
Speaker 1: or like even worse, you like start to act on
Speaker 1: those impulses. I think that's definitely when it gets really bad.
Speaker 1: So having those, uh, those thoughts are totally normal, like
Speaker 1: you said, but yeah, once you start to take a
Speaker 1: step further, that's when it gets bad. Um. Well, Hana,
Speaker 1: hopefully that helps you. I think I think it might.
Speaker 1: But you're twenty four year so young. I mean, it's
Speaker 1: it's weird for me to say that to you because
Speaker 1: I know you're younger than Hannah is, but um, just
Speaker 1: it's just so young. You know, Yeah, who knows. Maybe
Speaker 1: this is the guy. Maybe it isn't. Just follow your heart, Hannah,
Speaker 1: I would say, odds are it's not, um, but let's
Speaker 1: move on to just send you. Yes, this EMA is
Speaker 1: from just Senya, She says. My boyfriend and I are
Speaker 1: going to my best friend's wedding at the end of
Speaker 1: the month. Since we've only been dating for four months,
Speaker 1: I don't know what our boundaries are when it comes
Speaker 1: to talking about our past hookups and relationships. Long story short,
Speaker 1: Three guys I've slept within the past will be at
Speaker 1: this wedding, and I'm going to have to introduce my
Speaker 1: boyfriend to them, and I don't know how to be honest.
Speaker 1: Should I just attend the wedding, introduce them like normal,
Speaker 1: and spare him the details. What if later he finds
Speaker 1: out and gets mad at me for keeping that information
Speaker 1: from him? Would you guys want to know? Help? That's
Speaker 1: actually a good question too. Um, that's a that's a
Speaker 1: hard one. I I'm in the camp of always being honest, um,
Speaker 1: and proactive is always good, but it sometimes proactive can
Speaker 1: kind of bite you in the butt where you're like, oh,
Speaker 1: I you know I hooked up with this person at
Speaker 1: one point or another one like that information is like, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's good to know, but it's always necessary for the
Speaker 1: other person to know. So it's like it can just
Speaker 1: kind of complicate things. I with Kalen specifically, I UM
Speaker 1: have been honest about everything all the time, and I'm
Speaker 1: just like this is like, this is what it was, UM,
Speaker 1: just to avoid any awkwardness. So I guess. I guess
Speaker 1: I'm always kind of in the camp of beat them
Speaker 1: to the punch and tell them beforehand. I don't think
Speaker 1: being honest can ever backfire at the at the end
Speaker 1: of the day, do you know what I mean? Like,
Speaker 1: not being honest and keeping something from the person you're
Speaker 1: with can cause issues, But I think everyone appreciates being
Speaker 1: kept in the loop to a certain extent. But then
Speaker 1: what's your what's your take on something where it's like,
Speaker 1: why would you tell someone that? Why would you tell
Speaker 1: someone something that has no effect on any situation? You're
Speaker 1: just telling But then you're kind of like getting there,
Speaker 1: could be getting their head, like you're just telling them
Speaker 1: that because for some reason you want them to know that, right. No,
Speaker 1: I think I think in this situation, if he if
Speaker 1: just Sendia's boyfriend is going to be around people she's
Speaker 1: slept within the past, and I think she owes him
Speaker 1: respect to give him the heads up, But I don't
Speaker 1: think she needs to sit him down and be honest
Speaker 1: about every single thing that's happened in her entire life.
Speaker 1: But when it has to do with him and could
Speaker 1: affect him, I think I would want to know if
Speaker 1: I were in his shoes. But I don't know, and
Speaker 1: they haven't been dating for that month or that long.
Speaker 1: They've haven't been dating for would you say, four months?
Speaker 1: Four months? But I feel like that kind of complicates
Speaker 1: it too, because that kind of makes her more on
Speaker 1: like the maybe I shouldn't share a sort of side. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't know. That's a tough one. I've I'm in
Speaker 1: the same boat as you. Like I've told Trevor everything
Speaker 1: because I met him in college, and so when he
Speaker 1: came to my hometown and met people from my life
Speaker 1: before college, like I would just give them the heads
Speaker 1: up if I knew he was going to be around
Speaker 1: people from my past, just because I would want to know.
Speaker 1: But then it kind of I mean, I get what
Speaker 1: you're saying too, because then he kind of got in
Speaker 1: his head about things and it just makes you question things.
Speaker 1: But at the end of the day, I would want
Speaker 1: to know, also, are you only telling them that because
Speaker 1: you're gonna be around them, And like if you weren't
Speaker 1: around them, they would never would have been told about
Speaker 1: it in the first place. That's kind of where I
Speaker 1: feel like the Big Bay area is where it's like,
Speaker 1: you know, it's so circumstantial. No, that is a that
Speaker 1: is a good question. I think, yeah, it is circumstantial,
Speaker 1: And like, if I know he's going to be around
Speaker 1: someone that I've hooked up with in the past, I'll
Speaker 1: tell him. But I don't know if I would have
Speaker 1: just told him about these people if I knew he
Speaker 1: wasn't going to be around them, because it just literally
Speaker 1: meant nothing and didn't order at all. But now he
Speaker 1: just like knows everything because he's been around everyone. Four
Speaker 1: years is a long time to it. You learned a
Speaker 1: lot about someone over that amount of time. I kind
Speaker 1: of a similar situation I think I shared on this
Speaker 1: podcast before too. Back when I was in college, I
Speaker 1: would get drunk and I would like tell girls to
Speaker 1: like punch me in the face for some reason, for
Speaker 1: whatever reason, because I'm a sick twisted human, I guess
Speaker 1: um and one of them was like my really good friends,
Speaker 1: and uh she I went to high school with her
Speaker 1: and then she went to this other college, but she
Speaker 1: went to college with a bunch of my other friends.
Speaker 1: So I would visit my friends and she would be
Speaker 1: there and I'd be like, punched me in the face whatever.
Speaker 1: And I've told that story a couple of times, and
Speaker 1: she like always loses it, like it's like like dies
Speaker 1: laughing kind of thing. And she was out at the
Speaker 1: bungalow like a month or two ago and she goes, Hey,
Speaker 1: I just met your friend from high school. She's so
Speaker 1: nice blah blah blah. And then uh, she like gets
Speaker 1: home that night and I was like, oh, yeah, you
Speaker 1: met Maggie. Remember when I told you that girl that
Speaker 1: would always punch me in the face in college, Like
Speaker 1: that was the girl that would always punch me in
Speaker 1: the face. And so I feel like by being honest
Speaker 1: about those things and you can kind of like come
Speaker 1: back to it later on and like like laugh about it.
Speaker 1: Caitlin was like dying laughing. She was like, I can't
Speaker 1: believe that's the girl that used to punch you in
Speaker 1: the face. That's so funny, like ha ha, So I
Speaker 1: think that I think like by being honest about those
Speaker 1: types of things, you kind of like gain like power
Speaker 1: over them, um in a good way, you know, like
Speaker 1: to be able to kind of look at them with
Speaker 1: the humor perspective. So yeah, exactly at the wedding with
Speaker 1: the three guys that you might have hooked up with, UM,
Speaker 1: I think you should tell him. I agree, I don't think.
Speaker 1: I think honesty in this situation is probably best. You
Speaker 1: can even make a game of it and be like, hey, um,
Speaker 1: just so you know this wedding that we're going to,
Speaker 1: I hooked up with three of the guys, and if
Speaker 1: you can guess all three of the guy guys, I'll
Speaker 1: take you to dinner or something. That's good. I hope
Speaker 1: she hears this before she goes to the wedding. Funny,
Speaker 1: that's a good that way. That way you can kind
Speaker 1: of like make a fun game out of it. I
Speaker 1: don't know, that'd be that'd be that'd be funny. I
Speaker 1: think that's what you should do. Um. All right, well, Hanna,
Speaker 1: thank you so much for reading those emails for us,
Speaker 1: of course anytime, and uh, your perspective was actually really
Speaker 1: helpful there too, so I appreciate that. UM. Big thank
Speaker 1: you to the listeners for sticking through this. Oh my gosh,
Speaker 1: just this horrible, horrible episode. I don't know why anyone's
Speaker 1: uh host episodes by myself, but here we are. Anyways,
Speaker 1: that's gonna do it. For this week's episode of Help
Speaker 1: I Suck at Dating, Big thank you to Hannah of course,
Speaker 1: Big thank you to Vanessa and Natasha from The Armenian
Speaker 1: Dating Show. Be sure to check out their YouTube series
Speaker 1: premaring on November. And big thank you to Hannah and
Speaker 1: just send you for emailing us. UM, if you have
Speaker 1: any similar situations or you know, need some unsolicited advice,
Speaker 1: give us an email I Suck at Dating at iHeart
Speaker 1: media dot com. Um, you know, maybe maybe even weigh
Speaker 1: in on the device that we're giving, because I feel
Speaker 1: like that could be pretty beneficial too. But thank you
Speaker 1: guys so much for listening. UM. Hopefully next week we
Speaker 1: have Jared back and maybe we'll suck just a little
Speaker 1: bit less. Follow help by Suck at Dating on I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast