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Speaker 1: Oh John, Oh Sam, I love you so much. I

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Speaker 1: love you almost as much as the great stories that

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Speaker 1: are about to come up. And you know what, I

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Speaker 1: love equally as much as the two minutes of sponsors

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Speaker 1: coming up, because they support the show and make sure

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Speaker 1: that we will have our happily Ever after.

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Speaker 2: I hired an actor to pretend to be my long

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Speaker 2: lost son to trick my wife. It was all fake

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Speaker 2: and it's I'm Not your Father week on Okay Storytime,

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Speaker 2: where we are diving into jaw dropping paternity twist and

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Speaker 2: family confessions that have you asking is this really my dad?

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Speaker 2: December twenty first, twenty twenty four, my wife and I

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Speaker 2: are watching Elf together and we saw the part where

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Speaker 2: Buddy will Ferrell's real dad, James Can tells his wife

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Speaker 2: about Buddy and his wife Mary gets excited about the

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Speaker 2: surprise adult kid that pops into their life from a

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Speaker 2: time before they knew each other. I point out to

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Speaker 2: my wife that it's a little unbelievable that she Mary

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Speaker 2: would immediately be on board I See You.

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Speaker 3: Based on title I See You as well.

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Speaker 1: Oh My, You're gonna go so far to prove a point.

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Speaker 3: I love that.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I'm so on board. I then comment that she

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Speaker 2: my wife, would actually be mad at me in the situation,

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Speaker 2: even if I genuinely did not know this kid existed

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Speaker 2: and it was conceived. Ah, yes, that's the right word,

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Speaker 2: and it was conceived before I had met her. She

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Speaker 2: denies it, but I know my wife. By the way,

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Speaker 2: this comes from Mark Weston, and if you want to

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Speaker 2: submit your own stories, go to our slash Okay story time.

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Speaker 2: Sub at it. So we are in our early forties

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Speaker 2: and have been married for ten years, together for twelve.

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Speaker 2: So I need a twentiesh kid to knock on the

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Speaker 2: door and tell me that they're my kid and that

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Speaker 2: they just want to meet me. Gotta be convincing and

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Speaker 2: really talk about how your mom and I were once

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Speaker 2: really happy before she passed away from something tragic. Dealer's choice, gender, race,

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Speaker 2: ethnicity don't matter. So long you can pass for early

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Speaker 2: twenty shouldn't take more than an hour of conversation. Then

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Speaker 2: you get a call or something and you have to

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Speaker 2: leave more than an hour. Want to do this soon

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Speaker 2: after the new year. You come up with the backstory

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Speaker 2: and play along. I'll give you a little infro up

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Speaker 2: top after you take the job, and we have an edit,

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Speaker 2: so he posts it looking for people near you. Edit

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Speaker 2: Holy cow, I have several interested potential fake offspring. I

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Speaker 2: am no longer taking applications. Do not expect so many

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Speaker 2: people willing. I'll post the winning candidate in the coming days.

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Speaker 2: Edit two. It looks like I not only have a

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Speaker 2: potential fake kid, but the kid could actually pass as

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Speaker 2: a genetically like me. I will post an up day

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Speaker 2: after the first week of January, hopefully not from a shelter.

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Speaker 2: Notable comments. This sounds like a bad idea, but please

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Speaker 2: post the follow up once you go through it. Days

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Speaker 2: you Go says worst case scenario. Okay, yeah, this could

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Speaker 2: go badly, but sometimes being right in a marriage is

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Speaker 2: worth it, Opie says. Another comment says you should hire

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Speaker 2: every single commenter here and have a whole week where

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Speaker 2: every day another new kids show up or slammer sixty

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Speaker 2: nine K says that why do I see in a

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Speaker 2: couple of weeks a post saying my wife punting me

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Speaker 2: out what cheap in is the best bit? Outside says

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Speaker 2: I want to have the courage to post that here,

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Speaker 2: but you might see and am I d hole along

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Speaker 2: those lines? In a couple of weeks we got an

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Speaker 2: update January seventh, twenty twenty five. Sixteen days later, Op

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Speaker 2: got excited and ran with it.

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Speaker 3: Ohp, He's like, okay, it's got time.

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Speaker 2: First off, I am still married, nice and my wife

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Speaker 2: thoroughly enjoyed the prank. I didn't have to sleep on

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Speaker 2: the couch.

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Speaker 3: Wow. Okay, we jumped to the end of the story.

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Speaker 2: You probably practiced making kids after that. Yeah, so to

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Speaker 2: the very dramatic nay serres, one of which compared my

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Speaker 2: prank to spousal abuse. Several dying knows me with a

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Speaker 2: numerous mental illnesses. Oh come on, and at least as

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Speaker 2: many of you said, I was childish and cruel.

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Speaker 3: I mean childish, yeah, but like in a funny way.

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Speaker 2: To you, I say, you're probably right. However, nah nah

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Speaker 2: boo boo, stick your head and doodoo. I hated saying that. Wow,

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Speaker 2: that was super childish. I didn't like it. Again, We've

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Speaker 2: been married for a decade. We know each other very

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Speaker 2: well to know what's over the line and what's funny.

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Speaker 3: That's what I was saying. Like, it feels like Op

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Speaker 3: knows what type of humor his wife would like.

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Speaker 2: I think Op knows what's like black and white, but

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Speaker 2: this is totally gray, and he's like, I think I

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Speaker 2: could get.

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Speaker 3: By think I could get by it. He knows that

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Speaker 3: she wouldn't divorce him over it. Yeah, yeah, he's like,

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Speaker 3: I'm might be in trouble for a night.

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Speaker 2: That said, it was harder than I thought to secure

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Speaker 2: a fake child. Sure, I had a large number of

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Speaker 2: interested parties and even a couple of fabulous candidates, one

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Speaker 2: of which actually looked like me. That I started wondering

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Speaker 2: if one of you got to be my wife and

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Speaker 2: we're pulling the ultimate una reverse card on my brak Nfortunately,

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Speaker 2: interested and committed are two very different things. Multiple potential

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Speaker 2: sons and daughters made it to the planning stage and

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Speaker 2: found out one reason or another to bail out. Let

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Speaker 2: me be clear, I do not blame these folks at all.

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Speaker 2: I don't think i'd have the courage to send the

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Speaker 2: first DM let alone actually go through with the prank

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Speaker 2: orchestrated by some complete stranger. But I did find suitable

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Speaker 2: actor with the courage to come through, and I still

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Speaker 2: think it was money well spent. So here's the synopsis

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Speaker 2: of how it played out. No, there is not a video, Dude,

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Speaker 2: Rink is a thing.

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Speaker 3: Why didn't you record this? You literally set this all up.

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Speaker 3: You got an actor. Now that poor actor can't use

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Speaker 3: this for is real.

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Speaker 2: Also, you know how much money you missed out on

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Speaker 2: a good thumbnail and some crappy video would go. You'd

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Speaker 2: get probably thousands of dollars.

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Speaker 3: Here, I pulled a fake child prank on my wife.

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Speaker 2: There you go, there's your title. Sophia does titles. Sophia's

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Speaker 2: a pro titles, aw shucks and thumbnails.

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Speaker 3: You should have just had LUs on the dude, I

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Speaker 3: could have done all of this.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you could have made the thumbnail.

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Speaker 3: I could have acted. I could have made the thumbnail,

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Speaker 3: and I could have made the.

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Speaker 2: Title, made the title, I could have got the video

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Speaker 2: stuff going.

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Speaker 3: Dude, what oh my gosh, missed opportunity? Opee.

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Speaker 2: Sounds like we're spies. You can hire us today to

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Speaker 2: be your fake child, to prove your.

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Speaker 3: Spouse wrong, your spouse wrong.

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Speaker 2: Saturday afternoon, my doorbell rang, my dog lost his mine,

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Speaker 2: as he has won to do, and my wife answered

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Speaker 2: the door since I had pretended to take a call

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Speaker 2: moments earlier. My son, looking about twenty to twenty five,

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Speaker 2: taller and better looking than I, asked if I was home.

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Speaker 2: My wife motioned to me. I conveniently just ended my

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Speaker 2: fake phone call. I came to the door. My son,

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Speaker 2: we even shared my first name. His idiot, not mine,

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Speaker 2: said he had something kind of strange to talk to

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Speaker 2: me about. I asked if he wanted to come in,

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Speaker 2: which literally almost blew the whole thing, because I would

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Speaker 2: rather saw off my own foot than invite people in

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Speaker 2: my own house. But my wife didn't think any more

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Speaker 2: thing of it. We came into the living room. I

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Speaker 2: offered him a drink, he declined, My son, it's an

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Speaker 2: excellent actor. By the way, he would later say, it

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Speaker 2: was the anxiety of the situation and not wanting to

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Speaker 2: mess up that made his nervous demeanor so convincing. This

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Speaker 2: is from memory, but it's pretty much everything. I'll let

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Speaker 2: my son chime in with details should he feel like

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Speaker 2: outing himself. Do you remember old ex girlfriend I mentioned

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Speaker 2: at least once in my ten years of marriage in

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Speaker 2: front of my wife. Yeah, that's my mother. It was

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Speaker 2: my wife who reacted first with oh, no way. So

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Speaker 2: I looked at her beaning ignorance, and then back at

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Speaker 2: my son, said is she okay? Yes, she's fine. That's

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Speaker 2: not why I'm here. My wife was nearly busting out

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Speaker 2: of her chair, totally engrossed and completely consumed two strong theories.

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Speaker 2: Her husband had a long lost son, and more importantly,

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Speaker 2: her husband hasn't figured out yet he has a long

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Speaker 2: lost son. So I say, out with the kid, what's

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Speaker 2: going on. I'm twenty two years old. My wife eyes

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Speaker 2: essentially bugged out of her head, having now confirmed her

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Speaker 2: theories in her mind. She looks at me, seemingly annoyed

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Speaker 2: that I hadn't put the obvious puzzle pieces together, and interrupts.

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Speaker 2: My fake kid nearly laughed, but I held it in together.

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Speaker 2: I think he's telling you that he thinks you're his father.

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Speaker 3: She's so into this, and I love that. She's like,

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Speaker 3: oh my god, you need a big faster. He's her kid.

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Speaker 2: She's not even mad at the fact that he is

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Speaker 2: like a long lost son.

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Speaker 3: No, he's mad that he's like put it together. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: he's like, put the two pieces together.

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Speaker 2: My iting is not that great, but I gave it

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Speaker 2: a shot with wait what I look of shot could

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Speaker 2: use some work, but it played for the audience. My

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Speaker 2: son looked at me. She's right, not here to ask

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Speaker 2: for anything in fact, I don't have a lot of

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Speaker 2: time to say, but I just wanted to meet you

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Speaker 2: and maybe exchange numbers. Me, this is a lot to

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Speaker 2: take in on your mother a long time ago. She

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Speaker 2: never said, I mean, I didn't know. I'm prayaphrasing, but

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Speaker 2: this kid deserves an oxscar. She never told you. She

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Speaker 2: only told me on Christmas morning. She didn't say anything

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Speaker 2: bad about you, just that it was over and she

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Speaker 2: already was dating my dad when she found out she

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Speaker 2: was pregnant with me me, wait, does your dad know him?

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Speaker 2: Of course, and I've always known he isn't my biological father.

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Speaker 2: He's a great dad, But lately I've been wondering who

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Speaker 2: my real father was. So I asked my mom and

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Speaker 2: she told me me.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: I freely admit I had the easy part.

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Speaker 3: My wife, this kid is doing a great job. He's

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Speaker 3: got a whole backstory that he wrote up.

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Speaker 2: He's getting his rent right now. My wife, I'm not

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Speaker 2: saying anything. She's taking it all in. Not much else

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Speaker 2: to tell in terms of production. We exchanged numbers and

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Speaker 2: then he got into his own fake phone call reminding

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Speaker 2: him he was late for something or another, and I

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Speaker 2: walked him out the rest of the production was just

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Speaker 2: my wife and I. I came back to the living

201
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Speaker 2: room doing my best bewilder act. We just talked about it,

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Speaker 2: cover things like paternity tests, things like that, And turns

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Speaker 2: out I was way wrong. My wife wasn't mad, miffled,

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Speaker 2: or even slightly annoyed. She was full, un amazed, excited

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Speaker 2: and entertained by the whole thing.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it was like, I know my wife, she would

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Speaker 3: be so mad about this and that She's like, this

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Speaker 3: is great. This is the most interesting thing that's happened

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Speaker 3: in my own marriage. And he's like, hmm, okay, maybe

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Speaker 3: I need to learn more things about my wife.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, either your wife smarter than you and knows about this,

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Speaker 2: and like did a I don't know what do you

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Speaker 2: call that? A double double fake out? I don't know

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Speaker 2: a double fake out? Or you just proved yourself wrong.

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Speaker 2: Oh this is beautiful. I waited a few hours before

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Speaker 2: I fessed up, but before I did, she kept saying

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Speaker 2: how cool it was that I wan't to have a song.

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Speaker 2: And then when I told her it was all be

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Speaker 2: a sly I made out to prove a point, she

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Speaker 2: laughed a lot. I can't decide what amused her more

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Speaker 2: the effort I put the ruse in, or the fact

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Speaker 2: that I ended up proving her right in the process.

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Speaker 3: That would be so great if someone prank me in

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Speaker 3: this way, I would like, I think, the shock of

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Speaker 3: finding out that it was a prank. Yeah, and then

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Speaker 3: also finding out that I had been proved by it

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Speaker 3: would be so great, such a great feeling.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I love the story. Here are a couple of

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Speaker 2: gems from what my wife said after I told her

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Speaker 2: the truth. Where the heck did you find that guy?

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Speaker 2: I'm glad your son wasn't a serial Unlaliver, I might

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Speaker 2: have been mad if he came here looking for money.

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Speaker 2: Next time you could save one hundred bucks and just

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Speaker 2: assume you're wrong. You know I'm gonna get you back right.

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Speaker 2: That last one has me a little worried. That was beautiful.

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Speaker 3: That was cute. I have a nice marriage.

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Speaker 2: Yes, And if you want to hear more crazy stories

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Speaker 2: just like this one, please go to your favorite podcast platform.

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Speaker 2: Search up Okay story Time and go to Apple, Spotify,

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Speaker 2: iHeartRadio wherever, and we will have crazy stories just like

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Speaker 2: this one. I love it.

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Speaker 3: I loved it.

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Speaker 2: Favorite story of the day probably the week I agree.

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Speaker 3: I feel like we always read stories where someone cheats

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Speaker 3: and it's sad, and this one's just funny and it's cute.

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Speaker 2: And guys, we have another day of I'm Not Your

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Speaker 2: Father Week coming up. We got another story right now,

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Speaker 2: and I'm gonna let Sophia theat honor, do us the honors,

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Speaker 2: a donor.

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Speaker 3: Do the honor. I'm finally meeting my online girlfriend, but

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Speaker 3: her anxiety is raging.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's scary meeting up in public and in

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Speaker 1: person me for real.

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Speaker 3: A couple of years ago, I twenty nine male, met

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Speaker 3: a girl twenty nine female through an online circle. We

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Speaker 3: talked frequently and it was always a great time. She's

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Speaker 3: very passionate about a lot of the same things I am,

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Speaker 3: and is very career driven, which is something I'm looking for.

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Speaker 1: Cute.

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Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from throw Away the US

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Speaker 3: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

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Speaker 3: to our slash Okay story time Separate. So early last year,

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Speaker 3: she opened up about having feelings for me, which I

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Speaker 3: was receptive to.

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Speaker 1: Let's go.

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Speaker 3: We started spending more time online together and eventually it

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Speaker 3: got to the point where she would be telling her

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Speaker 3: coworkers and family members about her boyfriend. This didn't bother

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Speaker 3: me too much, very interested, but for me, I had

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Speaker 3: to meet her to seal that deal. Fast forward to

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Speaker 3: Christmas and my gift to her was going to be

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Speaker 3: a trip up to meet her USA to Canada. The

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Speaker 3: trip was very expensive, but worth it. We had talked

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Speaker 3: about me going to meet her a few times and

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Speaker 3: thought it was better that way as she has a

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Speaker 3: lot of anxiety. Very important for later.

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Speaker 1: Wait, so are they boyfriend girlfriend now but they have

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Speaker 1: not yet met in person.

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Speaker 3: Well, it seems like they're a boyfriend girlfriend on her

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Speaker 3: side and he's just like I guess.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, we're boyfriend girlfriend on my mom's side and.

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Speaker 3: Health issues that would make it much harder for her,

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Speaker 3: especially in this current political climate. Well, that trip happened

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Speaker 3: this weekend. I'm currently typing this out from my hotel room,

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Speaker 3: which I've spent them the vast majority of my time here.

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Speaker 1: Alone in cash money.

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Speaker 3: The trip to see her started off how I expected.

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Speaker 3: I don't know the city at all. It's a country

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Speaker 3: I've only been to a few times, and I was

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Speaker 3: nervous myself. I took a forty minute Uber to my

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Speaker 3: hotel and expected that by the time I got there,

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Speaker 3: she would have worked out her nerves and be ready

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Speaker 3: to meet me. Unfortunately, her ing's was extra bad and

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Speaker 3: it took her another two hours to work up the

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Speaker 3: courage to drive five minutes to come see me. This

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Speaker 3: didn't bother me at the time. I knew it'd be rough,

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Speaker 3: and I'm a patient dude. For the most part we met,

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Speaker 3: she was shaking and bawling her eyes out, but overall

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Speaker 3: it was great. Dang, that's tough.

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Speaker 1: I guess there's a lot of build up.

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Speaker 3: We shared some hugs and we drove to her place.

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Speaker 3: She lives with her brother, so I was able to

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Speaker 3: meet him and we chilled out for a little while.

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Speaker 3: Her anxiety was still through the roof, though, so we

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Speaker 3: didn't actually do much for the next couple of hours.

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Speaker 3: She wanted to drive around and show me stuff, but couldn't.

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Speaker 3: Eventually she decided I should probably uber back instead of

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Speaker 3: her driving me. The next morning, I was up extra early.

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Speaker 3: She usually works nights, so I figured she wouldn't be

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Speaker 3: up for a bit. Not knowing the city, I chose

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Speaker 3: to stay in and wait until she was wake. Four

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Speaker 3: hours later, she messaged me. We talked for a bit

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Speaker 3: and she told me she wasn't quite ready to see me,

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Speaker 3: as the nerves were still there. That's fine. I found

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Speaker 3: a substance store in walking distance where I could pick

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Speaker 3: some stuff up and get us some food at a

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Speaker 3: local spot before meeting up. We asked forward About two

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Speaker 3: hours later and I finally get back to her place.

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Speaker 3: She doesn't eat anything and tells me that her brother,

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Speaker 3: her and I are going to go. Do we get

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Speaker 3: together and hang out with a bunch of the friends.

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Speaker 3: That's cool. I ask her how long we'll be there,

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Speaker 3: and she said a few hours. We leave and it's about.

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Speaker 1: An hour drive, So it sounds like right now, she's

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Speaker 1: kind of introducing him to her world. Yeah, besides all

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Speaker 1: the anxiety and stuff, I don't know if I see

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Speaker 1: like too many red flags.

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Speaker 3: Which also it seems like she thoroughly prepared him for it,

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Speaker 3: because he was like, yeah, I expected to wait three hours.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Every one of her friends was great, super welcoming, and

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Speaker 3: she seemed really happy to introduce me as her boyfriend.

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Speaker 3: The little party lasted a good portion of the night.

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Speaker 3: We didn't talk much, as I was usually getting bounded

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Speaker 3: by our friends or she was playing a game or something.

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Speaker 3: Around ten when we go to leave and there's still

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Speaker 3: plenty of night left. I figured she tends to be

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Speaker 3: up until three or four in the morning, so get

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Speaker 3: some sleep, girl. Well I mean he said you woke

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Speaker 3: up and she.

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Speaker 1: Texted like four hours later, so that's crazy.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I was pretty pumped to get to spend the

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Speaker 3: rest of the night together. However, as we get in

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Speaker 3: the car, she asks her brother if it's cool that

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Speaker 3: she takes me to the hotel before they go home.

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Speaker 3: He says yeah, and I just get to sit and

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Speaker 3: shock the whole way back that she's too drained to

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Speaker 3: spend a couple of hours of quality time with her

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Speaker 3: boyfriend she just met. At this point, it's all starting

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Speaker 3: to catch up to me and I'm feeling pretty bad.

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Speaker 1: So he's like, oh, I'm being left out.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, But the thing is, it seems like he's expecting

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Speaker 3: a lot more closeness, which is valid.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I do think that is valid, seeing that

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Speaker 1: he flew out to a country he's never been to

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Speaker 1: spend time with her, and.

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Speaker 3: She's also calling him her boyfriend.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but not necessarily acting with the closeness that that

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Speaker 1: title kind of title.

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Speaker 3: However, it's also kind of somewhat understandable that she's treating

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Speaker 3: him like a stranger or you know, a new friend,

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Speaker 3: because he is like they've never met in person.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I think they have enough closeness that at

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Speaker 1: least like the communication should be there, But it seems

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Speaker 1: like the main issue is that she's not spending time

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Speaker 1: with him. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I get back to the hotel room and I'm just

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Speaker 3: confused by this whole trip. I'm alone in a hotel

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Speaker 3: room in a country I don't know, with my girlfriend

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Speaker 3: a few minutes away, not knowing what to do, what

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Speaker 3: the heck is going on. I fear messaging her about

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Speaker 3: it is going to make her anxiety worse, But at

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Speaker 3: this point, I don't know what to do communicate. I

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Speaker 3: think that if you are afraid that you can't even

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Speaker 3: communicate because of her anxiety, that's not gonna work. You

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Speaker 3: have to communicate, and also it probably would help with

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Speaker 3: alleviate some areas of anxiety, because she, you know, a

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Speaker 3: lot of anxiety, is making up terrible scenarios about, you know,

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Speaker 3: things that you don't know for sure. I'm set to

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Speaker 3: meet her mom in the evening for dinner, and at

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Speaker 3: this point I feel like I've met everyone except for

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Speaker 3: my girlfriend, so I message for that. She's very apologetic,

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Speaker 3: saying her anxiety is through the roof still and she

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Speaker 3: wanted to make this trip worth it for me, but

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Speaker 3: she's just drained. She makes an effort to let me

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Speaker 3: know she's still very interested in everything, but she knows

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Speaker 3: if we're alone together nothing would happen because she's just

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Speaker 3: too nervous. She hasn't been in a relationship in a

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Speaker 3: couple of years, so it's hard for her. I tell her,

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Speaker 3: I don't even want to try anything intimate. If that

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Speaker 3: was her fear. I've barely hugged her this trip, and

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Speaker 3: there's a lot more steps in that process before anything

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Speaker 3: like that could happen. I just want to spend more

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Speaker 3: quality time together, and she said tomorrow after I meet

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Speaker 3: her mom, there will probably be time. I mean, I

396
00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:24,919
Speaker 3: understand that he literally flew out, but it does feel

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Speaker 3: like everything is being rushed, and also simultaneously, this feels

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Speaker 3: like the first meeting.

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Speaker 1: It's like, let me introduce you to all my family

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Speaker 1: and all my friends, but also let's not spend too

401
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Speaker 1: much time together. I feel like if we were to

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Speaker 1: rewrite this a little bit and try to maybe take

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Speaker 1: it a little more balanced. On either side. It would

404
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Speaker 1: be like, let's not meet the whole family.

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Speaker 3: Let's not call each other boyfriend girlfriend until we met each.

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Speaker 1: Other, see how it is to hang out one on one,

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Speaker 1: and then maybe let's add the title of boyfriend and

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Speaker 1: all the parents meeting.

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Speaker 3: I do think it is fair that she wanted to

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Speaker 3: meet him with other people around. I think that's kind

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Speaker 3: of a safety thing. But I feel like it's weird

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Speaker 3: to do that and call him your boyfriend. I feel

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Speaker 3: like it sends some kind of mixed messages.

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00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:09,480
Speaker 1: I feel like spending some time one on one, if

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Speaker 1: you want this relationship to progress, you gotta do it.

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Speaker 1: Might be scary, but you gotta do it.

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Speaker 3: All that said, today is my last day here. I

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Speaker 3: leave early tomorrow morning on a flight. I feel like

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Speaker 3: this whole thing has been a waste, and I'm still

420
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Speaker 3: just confused. I wanted to spend quality time with her,

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Speaker 3: not sit in a hotel room alone for most of

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Speaker 3: my trip. In my mind, she would want to be

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Speaker 3: with me every waking moment of the trip. Our time

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Speaker 3: is so short. We've talked about it for ages, and

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Speaker 3: I thought that was going to be the case. I

426
00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:39,320
Speaker 3: don't know if the relationship can last after this, and

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00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:42,840
Speaker 3: there are some comments and an update, any thoughts.

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Speaker 1: I mean, if she can't spend one on one time

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Speaker 1: with you, the relationship isn't gonna work. So yeah, I

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Speaker 1: can understand this kind of like this trip shaking your

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00:19:52,720 --> 00:19:55,800
Speaker 1: trust in the relationship again. I would talk to her

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Speaker 1: about that as soon as you can.

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Speaker 3: The problem is that everything that she's probably worried about

434
00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:03,119
Speaker 3: of getting to know you can't be fixed once you

435
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Speaker 3: go back to just an online relationship.

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Speaker 1: Exactly like that. He is right, this is precious time.

437
00:20:08,520 --> 00:20:09,400
Speaker 1: You gotta use it.

438
00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:11,440
Speaker 3: Aren't you? On email says you have one more night

439
00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:14,280
Speaker 3: in this city you will probably not visit again. I say,

440
00:20:14,320 --> 00:20:16,800
Speaker 3: go out, explore the city with whatever time you have left,

441
00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:18,840
Speaker 3: find some cool local food stuff, and go to a

442
00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:21,280
Speaker 3: bar or two. Sorry, your trip has not worked out

443
00:20:21,320 --> 00:20:23,280
Speaker 3: like you would have liked it too, but might as

444
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:25,080
Speaker 3: well make the most of what little time you have left.

445
00:20:25,200 --> 00:20:27,760
Speaker 3: Franjo Manjo says, you had to give it a shot,

446
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:29,760
Speaker 3: but it sounds like it didn't work out. You need

447
00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:31,600
Speaker 3: to be honest and tell her how this made you feel.

448
00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:33,720
Speaker 3: If she wants to keep seeing you, she's got to

449
00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:36,280
Speaker 3: travel to you next time. If she's too anxious for that,

450
00:20:36,359 --> 00:20:39,520
Speaker 3: then you're not compatible and wasting your time. Yesterday morning,

451
00:20:39,520 --> 00:20:42,360
Speaker 3: I woke up, made the original post, and waited nervously

452
00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:44,320
Speaker 3: for her to wake up. It once again took a

453
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:47,600
Speaker 3: couple of hours. A little after noon, she finally messaged me.

454
00:20:47,800 --> 00:20:49,280
Speaker 3: Is this girl going at about at three in the

455
00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:50,040
Speaker 3: morning every day?

456
00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:52,080
Speaker 1: You know what time difference?

457
00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:54,720
Speaker 3: She said. We had dinner in the later afternoon with

458
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:57,199
Speaker 3: her mother, and I could uber over to her place whenever.

459
00:20:57,359 --> 00:20:59,360
Speaker 3: A few of you suggested I should just call off

460
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:02,040
Speaker 3: the dinner plan, but I decided to stick it through.

461
00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:05,119
Speaker 1: I don't like how he traveled all the way over

462
00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:07,760
Speaker 1: to there and now he's having to like uber to her.

463
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:10,560
Speaker 3: Yeah. I went up to her place shortly after that,

464
00:21:10,680 --> 00:21:13,000
Speaker 3: and we spent some time watching things. She was having

465
00:21:13,040 --> 00:21:15,560
Speaker 3: a better day, so we sat close and while we

466
00:21:15,680 --> 00:21:18,240
Speaker 3: didn't do anything, a brother was in the small house.

467
00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:20,520
Speaker 3: It was some quality time I had been looking for,

468
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:21,600
Speaker 3: so she brought it back.

469
00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:24,239
Speaker 1: Ah, dude, maybe she can save it, but I'm not

470
00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:25,440
Speaker 1: super hopeful right yet.

471
00:21:25,480 --> 00:21:28,760
Speaker 3: Dinner with her mother was great. We connected well, and

472
00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:32,159
Speaker 3: she seemed to genuinely be excited for me and her daughter.

473
00:21:32,320 --> 00:21:34,400
Speaker 3: We left with a hug from her mom and went

474
00:21:34,440 --> 00:21:36,439
Speaker 3: back to her place. It was a lot more of

475
00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:38,960
Speaker 3: the same thing as before, so while it wasn't alone

476
00:21:39,040 --> 00:21:41,440
Speaker 3: time with her, it did feel more one on one

477
00:21:41,560 --> 00:21:43,760
Speaker 3: and we had a good time. Was it exactly what

478
00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:45,719
Speaker 3: I was expecting on the last day of the strip?

479
00:21:45,960 --> 00:21:49,520
Speaker 3: Not really, but was it nice? Definitely. It was getting

480
00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:51,320
Speaker 3: late and I was half expecting her to want me

481
00:21:51,359 --> 00:21:54,000
Speaker 3: to uber back, but she drove me herself. She helped

482
00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:56,520
Speaker 3: me confirm my packing for the fight early this morning,

483
00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:57,840
Speaker 3: and we ended with a kiss.

484
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:02,520
Speaker 1: Okay, they smooched. We brought it back, let's go. I

485
00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:04,440
Speaker 1: think if they hadn't smooched, it would have been done

486
00:22:04,480 --> 00:22:06,720
Speaker 1: dead in the water, but the smooch. The smooch might

487
00:22:06,760 --> 00:22:08,640
Speaker 1: give it a few more months at the very least.

488
00:22:08,680 --> 00:22:11,159
Speaker 3: We got to texting a bit and we realized she

489
00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:13,320
Speaker 3: hadn't taken a photo of us for a frame she

490
00:22:13,359 --> 00:22:15,879
Speaker 3: had bought. I was pretty sad that we hadn't, and

491
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:18,000
Speaker 3: the few pictures of us from that weekend didn't really

492
00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:20,280
Speaker 3: fit the vibe she was going for. I mentioned that

493
00:22:20,320 --> 00:22:22,960
Speaker 3: I should just uber back. Ten minutes later, waiting for

494
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:26,200
Speaker 3: a response, and she tells me to come down. Anxiety

495
00:22:26,240 --> 00:22:29,119
Speaker 3: be danged. She did drive back just for the photo

496
00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:30,480
Speaker 3: and another goodbye smooch.

497
00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:36,080
Speaker 1: Okay, I think we are looking much better than the

498
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:37,080
Speaker 1: last updates.

499
00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:39,960
Speaker 3: So overall, it wasn't the perfect weekend, but I'm going

500
00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:42,959
Speaker 3: to stay cautiously optimistic. I think it was a mistake

501
00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:46,439
Speaker 3: to not make the trip longer. Honestly, it seems like

502
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:49,480
Speaker 3: a couple days. Honestly, it probably would have been better

503
00:22:49,680 --> 00:22:53,440
Speaker 3: for you to have that kind of awkwardness buffer. We'll

504
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:55,840
Speaker 3: we'll see how things go when she has to decide

505
00:22:55,840 --> 00:22:57,800
Speaker 3: if she wants to make the solo trip down here

506
00:22:57,880 --> 00:23:00,520
Speaker 3: for an event closer to this summer. By the way,

507
00:23:00,960 --> 00:23:04,959
Speaker 3: you can make a solo trip down to your favorite

508
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:08,399
Speaker 3: podcast app such as Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or iHeartRadio and

509
00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:11,119
Speaker 3: search a booky story time because we got episodes just

510
00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:11,800
Speaker 3: like this.

511
00:23:12,119 --> 00:23:16,400
Speaker 1: Plus more days and days and days of NonStop audio

512
00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:17,439
Speaker 1: into your ear holes.

513
00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:20,680
Speaker 3: But there's a little bit left to this story. Do

514
00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:21,639
Speaker 3: you have the final thoughts?

515
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:23,760
Speaker 1: I mean, so what he said is like, I want

516
00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:27,320
Speaker 1: her to come to me next time. I doubt that

517
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:29,520
Speaker 1: she's going to be able to if she's having this

518
00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:33,920
Speaker 1: much anxiety. On her home turf. There's no way she's

519
00:23:33,920 --> 00:23:36,679
Speaker 1: gonna get on a whole plane. She can't even get

520
00:23:36,720 --> 00:23:38,720
Speaker 1: in a car. She worked up to it, She worked

521
00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:41,000
Speaker 1: up to it. But I guess I'm just like, let's

522
00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:43,520
Speaker 1: see if she can handle you going there again.

523
00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:46,440
Speaker 3: I think you just have to talk about her chipping

524
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:49,879
Speaker 3: into the flight stuff, you know. Like I think, in

525
00:23:49,960 --> 00:23:52,159
Speaker 3: her ideal world, it probably would have been best to

526
00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:54,520
Speaker 3: go for someone who is a little bit closer to home.

527
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:56,600
Speaker 3: But this is kind of how it worked out, and

528
00:23:56,680 --> 00:23:59,360
Speaker 3: it seems like her anxiety's not gonna go away. It's

529
00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:01,160
Speaker 3: gonna be a big part part of your relationship.

530
00:24:01,359 --> 00:24:03,240
Speaker 1: I guess I just don't want him to build up

531
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:05,320
Speaker 1: this expectation. She's like, Yeah, she's gonna come to me next,

532
00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:07,760
Speaker 1: you know, I just don't think that's realistic. But we

533
00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:08,920
Speaker 1: got a little bit more of the story.

534
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:11,440
Speaker 3: Let's see to clear some things up. She's on medication

535
00:24:11,520 --> 00:24:13,960
Speaker 3: and goes to a therapist, though her current therapist is

536
00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:16,639
Speaker 3: very new to her. Normally I wouldn't be into a

537
00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:19,840
Speaker 3: long distant relationship, but our likes and interests a line well,

538
00:24:19,960 --> 00:24:22,400
Speaker 3: and it's something I've struggled to find around me. Back home,

539
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:25,119
Speaker 3: my last relationship was decently long and taught me that

540
00:24:25,240 --> 00:24:28,159
Speaker 3: was something I valued a lot. And some last comments,

541
00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:30,399
Speaker 3: grim Work says, Hey, I just wanted to say that

542
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:33,240
Speaker 3: I get where you're coming from. Years ago, I met

543
00:24:33,280 --> 00:24:35,919
Speaker 3: someone online and we talked and connected in ways I

544
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:38,880
Speaker 3: never had with another person. But she was three thousand

545
00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:41,280
Speaker 3: miles away from me. Me and the US her in

546
00:24:41,359 --> 00:24:44,399
Speaker 3: the UK. We did the whole online thing for months,

547
00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:47,440
Speaker 3: and even online it got spicy. But when she came

548
00:24:47,480 --> 00:24:49,040
Speaker 3: with her brother to meet me in New York, it

549
00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:51,560
Speaker 3: was weird for the first few days. I think the

550
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:54,320
Speaker 3: issue here is it was a very short time for her,

551
00:24:54,440 --> 00:24:57,080
Speaker 3: especially since she has all kinds of anxiety. Meeting you

552
00:24:57,320 --> 00:24:59,560
Speaker 3: was probably the most anxious thing for her, so in

553
00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:02,200
Speaker 3: a way, you were the reason why she was so standoffish.

554
00:25:02,320 --> 00:25:04,880
Speaker 3: I will say for me, it's now seventeen years later

555
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:07,440
Speaker 3: and we've been married for fifteen of those I love

556
00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:09,880
Speaker 3: that I'm now in the UK with her after years

557
00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:12,639
Speaker 3: of her living in the US. For me, the bemused muse,

558
00:25:12,920 --> 00:25:14,680
Speaker 3: I had an online friend and we were chatting for

559
00:25:14,720 --> 00:25:16,560
Speaker 3: a decade or more. It became a parent that we

560
00:25:16,560 --> 00:25:18,520
Speaker 3: were probably in love with each other. But one or

561
00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:21,120
Speaker 3: other of us has always been in a relationship. Well,

562
00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:23,440
Speaker 3: one day we were both single and we were like, well,

563
00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:27,320
Speaker 3: should probably find out. So I traveled five thousand miles

564
00:25:27,320 --> 00:25:29,720
Speaker 3: to see her and there was no spark. All the

565
00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:33,760
Speaker 3: ten years of friendship, flirting, closeness, nothing in person. Anyhow,

566
00:25:33,800 --> 00:25:36,040
Speaker 3: my man, you're doing better than me. I wish you luck.

567
00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:38,480
Speaker 3: You know what I think this comment right before this comment,

568
00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:41,760
Speaker 3: I think had a great point of sometimes meeting people

569
00:25:41,800 --> 00:25:44,840
Speaker 3: in person is just really awkward, and then you need

570
00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:47,639
Speaker 3: a minute to get over the awkwardness. Like that's just

571
00:25:47,680 --> 00:25:48,200
Speaker 3: how it is.

572
00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:52,040
Speaker 1: So I'm meeting up with one of my friends that

573
00:25:52,119 --> 00:25:55,439
Speaker 1: I haven't seen in like five or six years for

574
00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:57,600
Speaker 1: the first time. I think that's going to be kind

575
00:25:57,600 --> 00:25:59,560
Speaker 1: of weird. I'm like, I'm a little nervous.

576
00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:01,520
Speaker 3: But as at the end of that story, that is

577
00:26:01,560 --> 00:26:02,520
Speaker 3: the end of that story.

578
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:07,520
Speaker 1: My boyfriend's baby mama still calls him husband.

579
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:11,800
Speaker 3: Should I leave, Well, don't let your husbands.

580
00:26:11,560 --> 00:26:14,600
Speaker 1: Stop you from finding your new husband. This isn't just

581
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,240
Speaker 1: a little am I the a whole post. It's a

582
00:26:17,280 --> 00:26:21,119
Speaker 1: deep dive into two years of a relationship that started

583
00:26:21,160 --> 00:26:26,040
Speaker 1: with promises and quickly devolved into a confusing, often hurtful,

584
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:32,040
Speaker 1: and ultimately unsustainable situation. I thirty four female, need your

585
00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:36,800
Speaker 1: raw unfiltered judgment on whether I'm the villain for finally

586
00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:40,560
Speaker 1: choosing my well being by moving out even if it

587
00:26:40,720 --> 00:26:43,480
Speaker 1: shatters my boyfriend's forty two male feelings.

588
00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:44,359
Speaker 3: And we're gonna give it.

589
00:26:44,359 --> 00:26:46,760
Speaker 1: We're gonna give you the raw on filteredness. By the way,

590
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:49,959
Speaker 1: this comes from Space Apprehensive one ninety four And if

591
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:51,679
Speaker 1: you want to submit your own stories, go to our

592
00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:54,720
Speaker 1: slash Okay story times. I'll write it. So our story

593
00:26:54,760 --> 00:26:57,440
Speaker 1: began about two years ago in a small rural town

594
00:26:57,560 --> 00:27:00,840
Speaker 1: in West Virginia. We're both working for the same staffing

595
00:27:00,880 --> 00:27:05,200
Speaker 1: agency where I was briefly his supervisor, and he says

596
00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:08,280
Speaker 1: that to everybody knew that he stops in the street

597
00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:10,640
Speaker 1: and speaks. I was working directly under her, and then

598
00:27:10,680 --> 00:27:13,680
Speaker 1: I was working it directly under her. Weeks before our

599
00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:17,080
Speaker 1: contracts were set to expire, along with everyone else from

600
00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:21,000
Speaker 1: our agency, a romantic connection sparked, or so I thought,

601
00:27:21,119 --> 00:27:23,840
Speaker 1: what does that mean? He seemed to mirror everything I

602
00:27:23,960 --> 00:27:26,280
Speaker 1: liked and wanted, or we having a yes man on him.

603
00:27:26,359 --> 00:27:29,320
Speaker 1: I mentioned my passion for travel, and suddenly he has

604
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:33,920
Speaker 1: and was a seasoned traveler himself, recounting tales of job

605
00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:39,120
Speaker 1: hunting across various Latin American countries he identifies as Latino Caribbean.

606
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:42,439
Speaker 1: I expressed my love for roses and the desire for

607
00:27:42,480 --> 00:27:45,040
Speaker 1: a partner who would surprised me with them, and he

608
00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:50,719
Speaker 1: declared himself a true romantic looking back at feels almost rehearsed.

609
00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:55,760
Speaker 1: Then came the inevitable question, what were my plans after

610
00:27:56,119 --> 00:27:59,080
Speaker 1: our contracts ended? I had come to West Virginia from

611
00:27:59,080 --> 00:28:02,040
Speaker 1: a large city in or specifically seeking a change of

612
00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:04,439
Speaker 1: scenery and a place to heal. I was in the

613
00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:08,080
Speaker 1: midst of a particularly difficult time navigating the legal aftermath

614
00:28:08,119 --> 00:28:11,679
Speaker 1: of a felony case involving my ex boyfriend, where I

615
00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:16,560
Speaker 1: was the victim and witness whoo. All I craved was

616
00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:20,359
Speaker 1: peace and a fresh start, and the temporary, well paying

617
00:28:20,440 --> 00:28:23,320
Speaker 1: job in West Virginia seemed like a perfect stepping stone.

618
00:28:23,359 --> 00:28:26,560
Speaker 1: I told him my plan was simple. Stay in West Virginia,

619
00:28:27,080 --> 00:28:30,119
Speaker 1: find a room or an apartment before the hotel we

620
00:28:30,119 --> 00:28:33,600
Speaker 1: were all temporarily housed, and punted everyone out, and that's

621
00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:37,000
Speaker 1: when he made his move. He urged me to come

622
00:28:37,160 --> 00:28:38,440
Speaker 1: with him to Miami.

623
00:28:38,600 --> 00:28:40,400
Speaker 3: Don't do a girl, don't do it.

624
00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:45,000
Speaker 1: You got a plan. You must give yourself your own sanctity. Anyway,

625
00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:48,480
Speaker 1: he framed it as taking our relationship seriously, dropping the

626
00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:52,960
Speaker 1: bombshell question, don't you want to put the eggs in already?

627
00:28:53,360 --> 00:28:55,880
Speaker 1: Don't you want to start a family? He even used

628
00:28:55,880 --> 00:29:00,280
Speaker 1: his cultural background, saying, come with me, us Latinos, we

629
00:29:00,320 --> 00:29:02,800
Speaker 1: take care of our girl. Being the hopeless romantic I am,

630
00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:05,560
Speaker 1: and perhaps a little vulnerable in my desire for connection

631
00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:09,400
Speaker 1: and stability, I agreed. You don't shop at a grocery

632
00:29:09,440 --> 00:29:11,640
Speaker 1: store while hungry, and ideally, you don't get into a

633
00:29:11,680 --> 00:29:15,760
Speaker 1: relationship while desperate for connection. I had never been to Miami,

634
00:29:16,040 --> 00:29:19,600
Speaker 1: and the idea was exciting, a complete change from everything

635
00:29:19,640 --> 00:29:22,360
Speaker 1: I had been through. However, even before we packed our

636
00:29:22,400 --> 00:29:26,240
Speaker 1: bags from Miami, the first major red flag slapped me

637
00:29:26,360 --> 00:29:28,720
Speaker 1: in the face. And again, none of what we saw

638
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:31,560
Speaker 1: before was a red flag. Oh, that was normal.

639
00:29:31,800 --> 00:29:34,000
Speaker 3: We're just getting to the red flags now.

640
00:29:34,440 --> 00:29:38,120
Speaker 1: Well, this is the red flag. I saw text messages

641
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:43,320
Speaker 1: on his phone from a woman calling him my husband.

642
00:29:43,440 --> 00:29:43,760
Speaker 2: Girl.

643
00:29:44,080 --> 00:29:46,760
Speaker 1: That is more than a red flag. That is a

644
00:29:46,840 --> 00:29:50,480
Speaker 1: wingsuit made out of red going by you, just like

645
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:51,240
Speaker 1: once a second.

646
00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:54,200
Speaker 3: I think he's someone's husband. If I were a hazard,

647
00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:55,040
Speaker 3: A guess.

648
00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:57,600
Speaker 1: I feel like I would believe it. Well. When I

649
00:29:57,680 --> 00:30:01,760
Speaker 1: confronted him, his explanation was dismissed. He claimed she was

650
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:04,000
Speaker 1: his second baby mama.

651
00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:06,880
Speaker 3: Just finding out that he has children. He's got multiple

652
00:30:06,880 --> 00:30:10,400
Speaker 3: baby mamas and also multiple children, presumably that he hasn't

653
00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:10,960
Speaker 3: told you about.

654
00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:13,240
Speaker 1: That they weren't actually married, and that he had told

655
00:30:13,280 --> 00:30:16,680
Speaker 1: her to stop using that term, but she persisted, just

656
00:30:16,840 --> 00:30:18,360
Speaker 1: like his first baby mama.

657
00:30:18,400 --> 00:30:21,600
Speaker 3: He's like, they won't stop asking me for child support.

658
00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:23,760
Speaker 3: I keep telling them to leave me alone.

659
00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:26,560
Speaker 1: You know what I actually think. I think they're both

660
00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:29,120
Speaker 1: still married, and I think he's doing a long distance

661
00:30:29,160 --> 00:30:31,960
Speaker 1: with all of them. That's my conspiracy theory. So my

662
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:35,400
Speaker 1: alarm bells were ringing, but I perhaps foolishly tried to

663
00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:39,120
Speaker 1: keep and push my concerns aside, telling myself to keep

664
00:30:39,160 --> 00:30:41,640
Speaker 1: an eye on things, especially since they both lived outside

665
00:30:41,680 --> 00:30:45,360
Speaker 1: the US double marriage. I even had the stereotypical thought

666
00:30:45,440 --> 00:30:48,840
Speaker 1: that maybe Latina's my own internalized bias is creeping in.

667
00:30:48,920 --> 00:30:52,240
Speaker 1: I admit could be crazy crazy. Once in Miami, living

668
00:30:52,240 --> 00:30:55,200
Speaker 1: in his rented place, things settled into a strange rhythm.

669
00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:57,239
Speaker 1: He paid the rent and covered expenses when we went

670
00:30:57,280 --> 00:31:01,280
Speaker 1: out well, I primarily handled the grocery shopping our mutual friends.

671
00:31:01,320 --> 00:31:05,440
Speaker 1: When I castually mentioned the baby mama situation, we're surprisingly nonchalant.

672
00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:08,000
Speaker 1: They chocked it up to him being a man, charismatic

673
00:31:08,040 --> 00:31:08,880
Speaker 1: and easy to fall for.

674
00:31:09,200 --> 00:31:12,080
Speaker 3: Your friends were like, oh, he's such a man, having

675
00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:13,760
Speaker 3: two baby mamas.

676
00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:17,240
Speaker 1: Man is supporting so many people. It's like a small village.

677
00:31:17,320 --> 00:31:20,160
Speaker 3: It's called community. I don't know who your friends are,

678
00:31:20,240 --> 00:31:23,080
Speaker 3: but maybe you should get friends with better advice.

679
00:31:23,360 --> 00:31:27,000
Speaker 1: Maybe it's just his friends and he's telling them all

680
00:31:27,240 --> 00:31:30,440
Speaker 1: the plant seeds their validation. Looking back feels like a

681
00:31:30,480 --> 00:31:35,040
Speaker 1: dismissal of my very real concerns. Then came the car.

682
00:31:35,760 --> 00:31:37,880
Speaker 1: We decided to get one and he was the only

683
00:31:37,920 --> 00:31:41,480
Speaker 1: one with a driver's license. I contributed two thousand of

684
00:31:41,520 --> 00:31:44,240
Speaker 1: my hard earned savings while he put in a thousand,

685
00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:47,200
Speaker 1: promising to pay me back as soon as possible. What

686
00:31:47,320 --> 00:31:48,720
Speaker 1: happened to taking care of everything?

687
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:49,000
Speaker 4: Yeah?

688
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:50,680
Speaker 3: I thought his whole thing was like, you're gonna come

689
00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:52,520
Speaker 3: to Miami and I'm gonna take care of you.

690
00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:55,680
Speaker 1: Like op, he's taking care of you. Well, the irony

691
00:31:55,760 --> 00:31:58,280
Speaker 1: is thick here Not long after, I stumbled upon text

692
00:31:58,280 --> 00:32:02,560
Speaker 1: messages between him and one of his baby mamas discussing

693
00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:05,720
Speaker 1: the car. He referred to it as a vehicle for

694
00:32:06,120 --> 00:32:09,880
Speaker 1: the family, lamenting only the absence of her and their daughter.

695
00:32:10,160 --> 00:32:11,640
Speaker 3: What that's his wife?

696
00:32:11,920 --> 00:32:13,760
Speaker 1: I think he has a whole second family. When I

697
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:17,719
Speaker 1: confronted him, his excuse was that it was just to

698
00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:21,120
Speaker 1: make her feel good for their daughter's sake. Girl, He's

699
00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:23,920
Speaker 1: just making you feel good for your sake. My frustration

700
00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:27,080
Speaker 1: was mounting. I pressed him again about his marital status,

701
00:32:27,360 --> 00:32:33,040
Speaker 1: and his answer was infuratively vague. He said, maybe there

702
00:32:33,080 --> 00:32:33,960
Speaker 1: is no maybe.

703
00:32:33,720 --> 00:32:35,840
Speaker 3: In marriage, either you're married or you're not.

704
00:32:36,320 --> 00:32:38,800
Speaker 1: He wasn't even sure because the government in their country

705
00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:42,400
Speaker 1: couldn't locate their marriage certificate, so it looked like no.

706
00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:47,120
Speaker 1: During this time, my already limited savings began to dwindle rapidly.

707
00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:50,480
Speaker 1: What happened to him paying for everything? I was unable

708
00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:53,280
Speaker 1: to secure employment in Florida without a work permit, which

709
00:32:53,280 --> 00:32:56,960
Speaker 1: was still in processing. I felt increasingly trapped independent. My

710
00:32:57,000 --> 00:33:00,600
Speaker 1: initial plan of finding stability in West Virginia was completely

711
00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:02,120
Speaker 1: derailed by you.

712
00:33:02,120 --> 00:33:03,880
Speaker 3: You turn that train off the tracks.

713
00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:07,360
Speaker 1: I don't want to blame Ope, you know, for being

714
00:33:07,440 --> 00:33:10,680
Speaker 1: swindled by a man that you know knew how to

715
00:33:10,760 --> 00:33:13,440
Speaker 1: wave red flags in a in a really fun way,

716
00:33:13,480 --> 00:33:15,360
Speaker 1: like one of those birds that just like jumps and

717
00:33:15,480 --> 00:33:16,640
Speaker 1: just like look at me dancing.

718
00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:21,000
Speaker 3: I don't want to blame op for being swindled by

719
00:33:21,120 --> 00:33:24,360
Speaker 3: Count Oloff in the most obvious disguise.

720
00:33:25,520 --> 00:33:29,400
Speaker 1: I do want to say, like, learn please, I hope

721
00:33:29,440 --> 00:33:30,880
Speaker 1: this has been a learning lesson.

722
00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:33,400
Speaker 3: When a man comes to you and says I am

723
00:33:33,480 --> 00:33:35,680
Speaker 3: a stone off, it's probably Count Olof.

724
00:33:35,880 --> 00:33:38,680
Speaker 1: I am bachelor, o off, I totally don't have any

725
00:33:38,880 --> 00:33:42,160
Speaker 1: children or wives. Come with me, O way to Miami.

726
00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:43,920
Speaker 3: Normally I'd say, trust your gun.

727
00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:45,600
Speaker 1: I think your guts off. I clung to the hope

728
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:48,080
Speaker 1: of returning to Virginia, where I knew getting a driver's

729
00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:51,200
Speaker 1: license would be easier, opening up possibilities for temporary work

730
00:33:51,520 --> 00:33:54,000
Speaker 1: like Uber while I waited for my work permit to

731
00:33:54,040 --> 00:33:56,880
Speaker 1: finally come through. As I felt more and more stuck,

732
00:33:57,160 --> 00:34:00,920
Speaker 1: his behavior began to shift. He oh, is your dependant?

733
00:34:01,120 --> 00:34:04,040
Speaker 1: He feels that he senses it. The initial charm seemed

734
00:34:04,040 --> 00:34:07,680
Speaker 1: to fade, replaced by growing irritability and a lack of empathy.

735
00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:10,480
Speaker 1: Being confined to his apartment day in and day out,

736
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:12,719
Speaker 1: unable to work or build any semblance of my own

737
00:34:12,760 --> 00:34:15,920
Speaker 1: life led me into a deep depression. Eventually, out of

738
00:34:15,960 --> 00:34:18,880
Speaker 1: sheer desperation, I started looking for staffing agencies that it

739
00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:22,279
Speaker 1: would accept the limited paperwork I had. I managed to

740
00:34:22,320 --> 00:34:24,600
Speaker 1: find a factory job and work there for about a

741
00:34:24,640 --> 00:34:27,840
Speaker 1: month until we finally made the move back to Virginia.

742
00:34:28,239 --> 00:34:32,160
Speaker 1: You're moving with him back to Virginia. What's going on?

743
00:34:33,080 --> 00:34:35,120
Speaker 3: He's going to realize, Oh, I have to leave him.

744
00:34:35,200 --> 00:34:37,279
Speaker 3: But you know what, this is a step because we're

745
00:34:37,320 --> 00:34:39,800
Speaker 3: going back to Virginia.

746
00:34:39,160 --> 00:34:40,759
Speaker 1: And Virginia's where we felt good.

747
00:34:40,760 --> 00:34:42,160
Speaker 3: We're kind of half on the track.

748
00:34:42,280 --> 00:34:46,399
Speaker 1: So for brief period, things felt somewhat normal until we

749
00:34:46,400 --> 00:34:49,160
Speaker 1: were involved in a car accident and lost the car,

750
00:34:49,400 --> 00:34:52,200
Speaker 1: the one I had contributed the majority of the funds for,

751
00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:55,000
Speaker 1: and the car accident seemed to be a turning point

752
00:34:55,160 --> 00:34:56,280
Speaker 1: for the worse.

753
00:34:56,560 --> 00:34:57,960
Speaker 3: I hope you guys have insurance.

754
00:34:58,160 --> 00:35:01,279
Speaker 1: Doesn't sound like it, Yeah, Yai. My anxiety was through

755
00:35:01,320 --> 00:35:04,600
Speaker 1: the roof and my distrust in him had solidified. I

756
00:35:04,640 --> 00:35:07,959
Speaker 1: started looking through his phone again. You obviously don't trust him.

757
00:35:08,200 --> 00:35:10,600
Speaker 3: The thing is that if you look through the phone

758
00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:13,799
Speaker 3: and you see something that says red flag, you have

759
00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:15,440
Speaker 3: to take it for what it is. You can't just

760
00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:19,520
Speaker 3: be like, oh, well, someone's calling him their husband. I

761
00:35:19,560 --> 00:35:22,239
Speaker 3: guess I'll ignore that. And also if you're snooping through

762
00:35:22,280 --> 00:35:23,400
Speaker 3: someone's phone none.

763
00:35:23,560 --> 00:35:26,440
Speaker 1: I know it's not ideal, but my gut was screaming, finally,

764
00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:29,080
Speaker 1: you're got telling you something right. I discovered a series

765
00:35:29,120 --> 00:35:33,279
Speaker 1: of disturbing voice messages from his wife. One in particular

766
00:35:33,800 --> 00:35:38,800
Speaker 1: sent chills down my spine. She described a dream involving

767
00:35:38,880 --> 00:35:43,880
Speaker 1: a black hand with long nails, honestly suggesting that someone,

768
00:35:44,520 --> 00:35:48,759
Speaker 1: presumably me, was doing something to him. At the same time,

769
00:35:48,800 --> 00:35:51,680
Speaker 1: he was confiding in me about his wife, calling her

770
00:35:51,719 --> 00:35:55,320
Speaker 1: by her first name, trying to create a sense of distance,

771
00:35:55,360 --> 00:35:58,640
Speaker 1: and claiming their marriage was over because he suspected her

772
00:35:58,680 --> 00:36:02,680
Speaker 1: of infidelity, something he apparently couldn't tolerate. The irony was

773
00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:05,360
Speaker 1: not lost on me. Then came the smallera, equally telling

774
00:36:05,400 --> 00:36:07,719
Speaker 1: incident that chipped away at my self respect. He asked

775
00:36:07,719 --> 00:36:09,279
Speaker 1: me to help him set up a Netflix account. I

776
00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:12,040
Speaker 1: explained the different plan options. He insisted on the cheapest

777
00:36:12,040 --> 00:36:14,760
Speaker 1: one with ads, and later I found a voice message

778
00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:18,680
Speaker 1: he sent to his wife complaining about my choice using

779
00:36:18,920 --> 00:36:23,319
Speaker 1: a deeply offensive and discriminary term. This dumb black did

780
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:27,359
Speaker 1: that and falsely claiming he had asked for the AD

781
00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:30,920
Speaker 1: free version, never communicated this preference to me. But the

782
00:36:30,960 --> 00:36:34,680
Speaker 1: absolute lowest blow, the one that truly revealed the depths

783
00:36:34,680 --> 00:36:36,839
Speaker 1: of his disrespect and cruelty, occurred during one of our

784
00:36:36,840 --> 00:36:41,400
Speaker 1: many arguments. So he's complaining to his wife, his actual wife,

785
00:36:41,640 --> 00:36:44,440
Speaker 1: that it seems like it's his actual wife about his

786
00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:48,880
Speaker 1: girlfriend Op getting the AD free version of Netflix.

787
00:36:48,719 --> 00:36:53,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, and also being racist towards her and OPI also

788
00:36:53,280 --> 00:36:56,839
Speaker 3: finds out that the wife is I guess accusing her

789
00:36:56,880 --> 00:37:01,640
Speaker 3: of witchcraft, apparently given that last sentence, did not break

790
00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:05,239
Speaker 3: up with him. After finding out that information.

791
00:37:05,160 --> 00:37:07,840
Speaker 1: Like to recount, the wife has not broken up, and

792
00:37:07,880 --> 00:37:12,080
Speaker 1: it seems like she knows n Op has not broken up,

793
00:37:12,239 --> 00:37:15,560
Speaker 1: and it seems like she knows what kind of game

794
00:37:15,840 --> 00:37:20,279
Speaker 1: is this man slinging that these people are not? Like, no,

795
00:37:20,760 --> 00:37:24,200
Speaker 1: I won't accept this, Like this guy must have something

796
00:37:24,239 --> 00:37:28,280
Speaker 1: going for him because he is an absolute trash bag

797
00:37:28,320 --> 00:37:32,560
Speaker 1: and somehow he's got multiple people hook line and sinker

798
00:37:32,880 --> 00:37:33,640
Speaker 1: fallen for him.

799
00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:36,399
Speaker 3: They're like, oh, yeah, I'm gonna crap talk the baby Mama,

800
00:37:36,400 --> 00:37:39,320
Speaker 3: I'm going to crap talk the girlfriend with my husband

801
00:37:39,320 --> 00:37:40,160
Speaker 3: slash boyfriend.

802
00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:46,600
Speaker 1: Everyone knows, everyone freaking knows. I'm so confused. So in

803
00:37:46,640 --> 00:37:49,080
Speaker 1: the heat of the moment, he spat out the words

804
00:37:49,200 --> 00:37:52,040
Speaker 1: you deserve someone like your ex, someone who beat you

805
00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:55,800
Speaker 1: up and affected you. This was direct reference to horrific

806
00:37:55,840 --> 00:37:58,640
Speaker 1: trauma confided to him, and the very reason I saw

807
00:37:59,040 --> 00:38:01,560
Speaker 1: refuge in West virgin in the first place. The fact

808
00:38:01,560 --> 00:38:03,520
Speaker 1: that he weaponized my pass against me is such a

809
00:38:03,600 --> 00:38:07,359
Speaker 1: vile way. Was a betrayal I couldn't comprehend. And then

810
00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:10,839
Speaker 1: he left right, No, no, no, I should have left then.

811
00:38:11,120 --> 00:38:15,640
Speaker 1: What I see that now with painful clarity, the final catalyst,

812
00:38:15,640 --> 00:38:17,640
Speaker 1: a moment I knew I had to escape. Happened last year.

813
00:38:18,080 --> 00:38:21,120
Speaker 1: Arguments had become frequent, and since our return from Miami,

814
00:38:21,440 --> 00:38:23,080
Speaker 1: his go to tactic was to punt me out of

815
00:38:23,120 --> 00:38:26,799
Speaker 1: the house during these fights. One particularly exhausting day, after

816
00:38:26,840 --> 00:38:29,080
Speaker 1: another such argument, I was simply too drained to play

817
00:38:29,120 --> 00:38:32,239
Speaker 1: his game. I told him, with a wary finality, that

818
00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:35,400
Speaker 1: I was moving out. So he reacted by storming out

819
00:38:35,440 --> 00:38:37,600
Speaker 1: of the house, and in a petty act of control,

820
00:38:37,640 --> 00:38:39,719
Speaker 1: he took some of my belongings with him. I was

821
00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:41,560
Speaker 1: left in town where I had few connections, in no

822
00:38:41,600 --> 00:38:45,200
Speaker 1: immediate place to go. Exhausted, defeated, I fell asleep while

823
00:38:45,239 --> 00:38:48,279
Speaker 1: half heartedly packing. My phone jolted me awake. It was

824
00:38:48,280 --> 00:38:51,279
Speaker 1: his mother. I initially ignored the calls, not in the

825
00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:53,399
Speaker 1: mood for any drama. I assumed she wanted to speak

826
00:38:53,440 --> 00:38:55,680
Speaker 1: to her son, as she often called me when she

827
00:38:55,719 --> 00:38:56,840
Speaker 1: couldn't reach him directly.

828
00:38:56,920 --> 00:39:00,560
Speaker 3: So the mom is aware of you, and also were

829
00:39:00,600 --> 00:39:01,280
Speaker 3: of the wife.

830
00:39:01,560 --> 00:39:05,479
Speaker 1: How did everyone know about this? And everyone's log sounds good?

831
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:08,880
Speaker 3: Like absolutely, it seems like this is getting into an

832
00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:11,919
Speaker 3: place chip. This is not a good relationship at all.

833
00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:15,200
Speaker 1: The Mama's boy label felt increasingly accurate, but then came

834
00:39:15,239 --> 00:39:18,040
Speaker 1: the barrage of demanding voice messages. Her tone was sharp,

835
00:39:18,360 --> 00:39:21,799
Speaker 1: almost accusatory, insisting I pick up the phone. When I

836
00:39:21,840 --> 00:39:25,680
Speaker 1: finally did, her tone was surprisingly gentle. She asked if

837
00:39:25,680 --> 00:39:28,640
Speaker 1: I could vacate her son's apartment because a cousin was

838
00:39:28,680 --> 00:39:31,279
Speaker 1: coming to stay. I told her I hadn't found anywhere yet,

839
00:39:31,320 --> 00:39:34,640
Speaker 1: and she retorted with a lie, claiming he had told

840
00:39:34,719 --> 00:39:36,919
Speaker 1: her I had found a place but was refusing to leave.

841
00:39:37,120 --> 00:39:39,759
Speaker 1: I told her I would call her son, which she

842
00:39:39,920 --> 00:39:42,960
Speaker 1: strongly advised against. Of course I called him. He was

843
00:39:43,000 --> 00:39:46,440
Speaker 1: furious with his mother, vehemently denying that a cousin was

844
00:39:46,480 --> 00:39:49,799
Speaker 1: coming and expressing his disappointment in her for interfering.

845
00:39:49,960 --> 00:39:51,799
Speaker 3: His mom is trying to get you out of there.

846
00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:53,480
Speaker 3: His mom's trying to help you.

847
00:39:53,800 --> 00:39:55,680
Speaker 1: He told me not to listen to her and not

848
00:39:55,760 --> 00:39:58,440
Speaker 1: to leave. He even spoke with his mother, who later

849
00:39:58,560 --> 00:40:02,720
Speaker 1: sent me a sheepish apologetic voice message. But the damage

850
00:40:02,760 --> 00:40:05,440
Speaker 1: was done. My trust in both of them was eroded.

851
00:40:05,600 --> 00:40:09,000
Speaker 1: That trust should have been eroded eons ago. I feel

852
00:40:09,040 --> 00:40:11,520
Speaker 1: like this is the grand canyon. That crap has been

853
00:40:11,520 --> 00:40:15,160
Speaker 1: eroded for millions of years. Yet you're sitting there is like,

854
00:40:15,440 --> 00:40:17,319
Speaker 1: is there a canyon here? Or is this just like

855
00:40:17,360 --> 00:40:20,319
Speaker 1: a little stream? Well days later, driven by a need

856
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:22,640
Speaker 1: to understand the full extent of their conversation, I looked

857
00:40:22,640 --> 00:40:25,760
Speaker 1: at his phone again. What I found were audio messages

858
00:40:25,800 --> 00:40:29,040
Speaker 1: between him and his mother from that day. He berated

859
00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:33,000
Speaker 1: her for causing trouble and not consulting him before contacting me,

860
00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:36,760
Speaker 1: and then came his mother's worried response about his temper

861
00:40:36,840 --> 00:40:40,200
Speaker 1: and character, and then his reply. He dismissed the situation,

862
00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:42,799
Speaker 1: stating that she will leave eventually. It's just that she

863
00:40:42,920 --> 00:40:46,520
Speaker 1: doesn't want to let go of the titties. He was

864
00:40:46,520 --> 00:40:49,240
Speaker 1: referring to me, implying that my inability to leave stem

865
00:40:49,640 --> 00:40:52,600
Speaker 1: from some form of dependence on him in the most

866
00:40:52,760 --> 00:40:55,920
Speaker 1: vulgar and demeaning way imaginable. Is he talking about like

867
00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:57,560
Speaker 1: his financial titties.

868
00:40:57,640 --> 00:40:59,200
Speaker 3: He's like the titties of my money.

869
00:40:59,719 --> 00:41:03,520
Speaker 1: What money? She was your supervisor and she paid more

870
00:41:03,560 --> 00:41:06,480
Speaker 1: for the car. You have no money. He was absolutely

871
00:41:06,880 --> 00:41:09,759
Speaker 1: no idea. I heard this. This was the ultimate betrayal.

872
00:41:10,000 --> 00:41:12,480
Speaker 3: Not every betrayal could be the ultimate one. You have

873
00:41:12,600 --> 00:41:15,960
Speaker 3: said this is the ultimate betrayal, like six times.

874
00:41:15,640 --> 00:41:18,040
Speaker 1: And again each time you stay, and then you really.

875
00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:20,360
Speaker 3: It's the ultimate betrayal. I couldn't go back.

876
00:41:20,600 --> 00:41:23,239
Speaker 1: Well, here we are in the present. A few weeks ago,

877
00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:27,480
Speaker 1: the landlord of our complex reached out informing me of

878
00:41:27,520 --> 00:41:34,680
Speaker 1: an available apartment. Big win. Without a second thought, I said, yes, yes, Opie, Yes, Well,

879
00:41:34,760 --> 00:41:38,360
Speaker 1: surface level interactions with my boyfriend might seem relatively calm

880
00:41:38,400 --> 00:41:42,520
Speaker 1: most because I've emotionally detached and I'm actively avoiding conflict.

881
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:44,080
Speaker 1: The truth is the way of the past two years,

882
00:41:44,080 --> 00:41:48,600
Speaker 1: the manipulation, the disrespect, the emotional. The blatant disregard for

883
00:41:48,760 --> 00:41:52,239
Speaker 1: my feelings and well being has finally pushed me to

884
00:41:52,360 --> 00:41:53,240
Speaker 1: my breaking point.

885
00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:55,360
Speaker 3: Thank god, I'm proud of you, Opie.

886
00:41:55,480 --> 00:41:57,880
Speaker 1: I hate that you're at a breaking point, but this

887
00:41:58,000 --> 00:42:00,520
Speaker 1: crap needed to break a long time ago. So long

888
00:42:00,800 --> 00:42:04,960
Speaker 1: the apartment represents not just a change of address, but

889
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:08,360
Speaker 1: a chance to reclaim my life, my sanity, and my

890
00:42:08,480 --> 00:42:11,680
Speaker 1: self respect. By the way, if you have any self

891
00:42:11,680 --> 00:42:14,160
Speaker 1: respect at all, you would have listened to our podcast,

892
00:42:14,239 --> 00:42:17,480
Speaker 1: Okay Storytime. Wherever you get your podcast, Just search Okay

893
00:42:17,480 --> 00:42:22,080
Speaker 1: Storytime on iHeart app, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite

894
00:42:22,080 --> 00:42:24,560
Speaker 1: podcast app. Just search Okay story on. Through it, we

895
00:42:24,640 --> 00:42:29,200
Speaker 1: got fifty days or more, fifty three days of NonStop

896
00:42:29,320 --> 00:42:33,480
Speaker 1: Okay Storytime stories just like this. So there's another relevant update.

897
00:42:33,560 --> 00:42:36,480
Speaker 1: But how can we not get in situations like this?

898
00:42:36,800 --> 00:42:40,440
Speaker 3: Well, I think it's just recognizing the signs when they start.

899
00:42:40,800 --> 00:42:44,279
Speaker 3: So the science here was this man was trying to

900
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:46,640
Speaker 3: be exactly what you.

901
00:42:46,640 --> 00:42:50,839
Speaker 1: Wanted and trying to say, baby, don't worry about a thing.

902
00:42:51,040 --> 00:42:51,680
Speaker 1: I got you.

903
00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:54,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, So he's trying to make you dependent on him.

904
00:42:54,600 --> 00:42:57,480
Speaker 3: He's trying to isolate you by bringing you to Miami

905
00:42:58,080 --> 00:43:01,160
Speaker 3: he's making himself into this per pon. Like when you

906
00:43:01,200 --> 00:43:03,080
Speaker 3: see a person and you start dating a person and

907
00:43:03,120 --> 00:43:05,759
Speaker 3: they seem maybe too perfect, and you're like.

908
00:43:05,719 --> 00:43:09,480
Speaker 1: Wow, if a person never disagrees with you, they're probably

909
00:43:09,480 --> 00:43:12,800
Speaker 1: not sharing what they actually think. But we got a

910
00:43:12,840 --> 00:43:15,880
Speaker 1: little bit more of this story. So after hearing every

911
00:43:15,960 --> 00:43:21,560
Speaker 1: single painful detail, am I the A hole for prioritizing

912
00:43:21,560 --> 00:43:24,800
Speaker 1: my own desperate need for a safe, independent, and peaceful

913
00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:28,240
Speaker 1: existence by moving out, even if it shatters the feelings

914
00:43:28,239 --> 00:43:30,799
Speaker 1: of a man who consistently has shown me profound lack

915
00:43:30,840 --> 00:43:33,800
Speaker 1: of consideration kindness. I am tired of feeling like an afterthought,

916
00:43:33,840 --> 00:43:37,600
Speaker 1: a convenience. I deserve my own space, my own peace,

917
00:43:37,719 --> 00:43:40,840
Speaker 1: and to finally heal from the emotional wounds this relationship

918
00:43:40,840 --> 00:43:44,360
Speaker 1: has inflicted. Lay your judgment. I'm ready or as ready

919
00:43:44,520 --> 00:43:45,600
Speaker 1: as I can be.

920
00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:50,360
Speaker 3: Obviously, not the A hole for that, Yeah, leave self

921
00:43:50,400 --> 00:43:53,040
Speaker 3: a hole for staying so long, but not the a

922
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:54,520
Speaker 3: hole for leaving please leave.

923
00:43:54,719 --> 00:43:56,680
Speaker 1: No, you're not the a hole for leaving. You're the

924
00:43:56,719 --> 00:43:59,359
Speaker 1: a hole to yourself for saying get out of that thing.

925
00:43:59,560 --> 00:44:03,320
Speaker 1: So that is the end of that story. Hey's johniog

926
00:44:03,440 --> 00:44:04,880
Speaker 1: host here. We're gonna get back to the stories, but

927
00:44:04,920 --> 00:44:07,320
Speaker 1: he's a quick three minute break of ass from our sponsors.

928
00:44:08,160 --> 00:44:11,680
Speaker 5: I called the cops on my brother because my parents.

929
00:44:11,360 --> 00:44:13,120
Speaker 3: Wouldn't address his actions.

930
00:44:13,840 --> 00:44:14,320
Speaker 2: Police.

931
00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:16,520
Speaker 6: My mommy won't ground my brother.

932
00:44:16,719 --> 00:44:18,080
Speaker 3: Hello, police, I'd like to tattle.

933
00:44:18,280 --> 00:44:20,200
Speaker 6: It's probably a lot more serious than that.

934
00:44:21,160 --> 00:44:21,920
Speaker 2: What's going on here?

935
00:44:22,600 --> 00:44:25,959
Speaker 3: March sixteenth, twenty twenty five. This is a recent one.

936
00:44:26,040 --> 00:44:29,279
Speaker 5: Me nineteen female, and my brother, seventeen male have never

937
00:44:29,360 --> 00:44:32,080
Speaker 5: really gotten along. He's always been kind of reckless, but

938
00:44:32,239 --> 00:44:36,240
Speaker 5: lately he's been getting worse, sneaking, out, lying, and now stealing.

939
00:44:36,360 --> 00:44:38,520
Speaker 5: By the way, this comes from Glimmeringly in fifty six

940
00:44:38,560 --> 00:44:40,040
Speaker 5: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

941
00:44:40,040 --> 00:44:42,120
Speaker 5: to the r slash okay storytime Supreddit.

942
00:44:42,440 --> 00:44:44,880
Speaker 3: So a few days ago, I noticed some money missing

943
00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:45,640
Speaker 3: from my room.

944
00:44:45,719 --> 00:44:47,399
Speaker 5: I don't keep a ton of cash, but I had

945
00:44:47,440 --> 00:44:49,960
Speaker 5: about three hundred dollars saved up for something important and

946
00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:53,520
Speaker 5: that was all gone. At first, I thought I misplaced it,

947
00:44:53,560 --> 00:44:55,799
Speaker 5: but then I checked my brother's room and guess what,

948
00:44:56,200 --> 00:44:58,960
Speaker 5: found some bills crumpled up in his drawer.

949
00:44:59,160 --> 00:45:02,200
Speaker 3: I confronted him and he straight up denied it. Even

950
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:05,680
Speaker 3: when I showed him the money. He said he ftarted outside, like, bro,

951
00:45:06,040 --> 00:45:07,040
Speaker 3: be serious.

952
00:45:06,760 --> 00:45:09,920
Speaker 7: I mean, technically, is that even a lie outside of

953
00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:10,560
Speaker 7: what his room?

954
00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:12,920
Speaker 6: Just like I found it outside, I'd say it was

955
00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:15,280
Speaker 6: outside of my pocket. It was outside my It's.

956
00:45:15,120 --> 00:45:16,880
Speaker 7: Like a good old wife like if you if you

957
00:45:16,960 --> 00:45:19,200
Speaker 7: zoom out far enough, it's like, that's not even a lot,

958
00:45:20,560 --> 00:45:21,120
Speaker 7: I guess.

959
00:45:22,640 --> 00:45:24,839
Speaker 5: I told my parents, expecting them to back me up,

960
00:45:24,880 --> 00:45:26,799
Speaker 5: but they brushed it off, like he's just a kid.

961
00:45:26,840 --> 00:45:29,520
Speaker 5: He probably needed it for something that pissed me off.

962
00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:31,560
Speaker 5: So I told my parents either he gives it back

963
00:45:31,640 --> 00:45:34,040
Speaker 5: or I called the cops. They didn't take me seriously,

964
00:45:34,280 --> 00:45:35,759
Speaker 5: so I actually did it.

965
00:45:35,840 --> 00:45:36,160
Speaker 1: Damn.

966
00:45:36,160 --> 00:45:40,160
Speaker 7: So you were actually on point, You're like, oh, now

967
00:45:40,200 --> 00:45:41,360
Speaker 7: on one, I'd like to tattle.

968
00:45:41,680 --> 00:45:44,960
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, that's an adventure time reference, not get him

969
00:45:45,040 --> 00:45:48,279
Speaker 5: arrested or anything, but just to scare him. The cops came,

970
00:45:48,400 --> 00:45:50,880
Speaker 5: talked to him and made him give the money back.

971
00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:53,359
Speaker 5: They didn't charge him, just gave him a warning. Now

972
00:45:53,400 --> 00:45:55,960
Speaker 5: my family is mad at me, saying I took it

973
00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:58,400
Speaker 5: too far and should have just let my parents handle it.

974
00:45:58,440 --> 00:46:00,600
Speaker 6: They weren't gonna handle it, yeah.

975
00:46:00,400 --> 00:46:03,280
Speaker 5: But they weren't going to do anything, and I'm tired

976
00:46:03,320 --> 00:46:04,560
Speaker 5: of him getting away with stuff?

977
00:46:04,560 --> 00:46:06,280
Speaker 3: So am I the a hole for calling the cops

978
00:46:06,280 --> 00:46:09,080
Speaker 3: on my own brother? And there's additional information?

979
00:46:09,560 --> 00:46:12,120
Speaker 5: Really quick, Opie says wild how I'm the bad guy

980
00:46:12,160 --> 00:46:14,360
Speaker 5: for expecting basic respect and not wanting my money to

981
00:46:14,400 --> 00:46:15,360
Speaker 5: mysteriously disappear.

982
00:46:15,480 --> 00:46:18,520
Speaker 3: Guess accountability is optional in this family? So what do

983
00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:20,360
Speaker 3: we think? Quick answer? Am the ahle or not?

984
00:46:20,440 --> 00:46:21,279
Speaker 2: How much money was it?

985
00:46:21,280 --> 00:46:22,160
Speaker 3: It's three hundred dollars?

986
00:46:22,520 --> 00:46:23,600
Speaker 6: Oh, not the hole?

987
00:46:23,760 --> 00:46:24,000
Speaker 3: Uh.

988
00:46:24,040 --> 00:46:27,120
Speaker 5: The consensus was that Opie is not the a hole

989
00:46:27,160 --> 00:46:30,040
Speaker 5: from all the comments. So we do have an update though,

990
00:46:30,120 --> 00:46:33,160
Speaker 5: all right, So update March seventeenth, the very next day.

991
00:46:33,280 --> 00:46:35,600
Speaker 3: So things have been awkward as heck. At home.

992
00:46:35,680 --> 00:46:37,719
Speaker 5: My parents are still acting like I'm the villain, and

993
00:46:37,800 --> 00:46:40,200
Speaker 5: my brother has been giving me the silent treatment, which

994
00:46:40,239 --> 00:46:42,280
Speaker 5: honestly isn't the worst thing in the world. But here's

995
00:46:42,320 --> 00:46:45,120
Speaker 5: where it gets interesting. Turns out I wasn't the only

996
00:46:45,160 --> 00:46:47,520
Speaker 5: one he was stealing from. A few days after everything

997
00:46:47,560 --> 00:46:49,799
Speaker 5: went down, my mom pulled me aside and admitted that

998
00:46:49,880 --> 00:46:53,359
Speaker 5: some of her money has been gone missing too. Would

999
00:46:53,440 --> 00:46:54,920
Speaker 5: you look at that, huh?

1000
00:46:55,080 --> 00:46:58,120
Speaker 7: Now when the shoes on the other foot, it's pretty stinky,

1001
00:46:58,239 --> 00:46:58,680
Speaker 7: isn't it.

1002
00:46:58,840 --> 00:46:59,799
Speaker 3: Yeah? She thought this.

1003
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:02,719
Speaker 5: He had just misplaced it, but now she's realizing it

1004
00:47:02,800 --> 00:47:05,480
Speaker 5: was probably him. I didn't say I told you so,

1005
00:47:05,800 --> 00:47:08,319
Speaker 5: even though I really wanted to, but I just gave

1006
00:47:08,360 --> 00:47:09,359
Speaker 5: her a look and was like.

1007
00:47:09,520 --> 00:47:13,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly. Now my parents are finally taking it seriously.

1008
00:47:13,080 --> 00:47:13,680
Speaker 3: But instead of.

1009
00:47:13,640 --> 00:47:15,640
Speaker 5: Being mad at him, they're talking about how he's just

1010
00:47:15,680 --> 00:47:18,000
Speaker 5: going through a phase and how they don't want to be.

1011
00:47:17,960 --> 00:47:20,120
Speaker 3: Too hard on him. Girl, he's seventeen, he's about to

1012
00:47:20,120 --> 00:47:20,600
Speaker 3: be an adult.

1013
00:47:20,719 --> 00:47:22,560
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's like, if you want to be hard on him,

1014
00:47:22,600 --> 00:47:24,480
Speaker 7: now's the time to do it, because if you wait

1015
00:47:24,560 --> 00:47:26,359
Speaker 7: much longer, you know who's gonna be hard on him.

1016
00:47:26,680 --> 00:47:27,400
Speaker 6: The state.

1017
00:47:27,880 --> 00:47:29,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, you can go to jail for real.

1018
00:47:29,840 --> 00:47:30,480
Speaker 6: Yeah.

1019
00:47:30,520 --> 00:47:33,600
Speaker 5: Meanwhile, he's still stopping around the house acting like I

1020
00:47:33,840 --> 00:47:37,040
Speaker 5: ruined his life. At this point, I've just distanced myself completely.

1021
00:47:37,120 --> 00:47:39,840
Speaker 5: I'm keeping my door locked and not leaving anything valuable

1022
00:47:39,880 --> 00:47:42,480
Speaker 5: around and honestly counting down the days until I can

1023
00:47:42,480 --> 00:47:42,799
Speaker 5: move out.

1024
00:47:42,880 --> 00:47:46,080
Speaker 6: Oh brother, Okay, guys, come on. Family meeting. Family meeting

1025
00:47:46,120 --> 00:47:47,040
Speaker 6: needs to happen now.

1026
00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:49,400
Speaker 5: Yeah, didn't expect this to get so much attention, but

1027
00:47:49,440 --> 00:47:51,759
Speaker 5: I really appreciate all the comments. It helps me see

1028
00:47:51,760 --> 00:47:54,520
Speaker 5: that I wasn't overreacting, and honestly, it's been reassuring to

1029
00:47:54,520 --> 00:47:56,400
Speaker 5: know that I wasn't crazy for standing my ground.

1030
00:47:56,520 --> 00:47:57,439
Speaker 3: So do I feel bad?

1031
00:47:57,560 --> 00:47:57,799
Speaker 1: Nope?

1032
00:47:57,800 --> 00:47:59,000
Speaker 3: Do I regret it? Still?

1033
00:47:59,000 --> 00:47:59,040
Speaker 4: No?

1034
00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:01,200
Speaker 5: If no one else else is going to hold him accountable,

1035
00:48:01,239 --> 00:48:03,600
Speaker 5: at least now he knows I will. And there's some

1036
00:48:03,640 --> 00:48:06,640
Speaker 5: additional information from Ope, didn't think this would blow up

1037
00:48:06,640 --> 00:48:08,480
Speaker 5: like it did. Be glad to know I wasn't reacting.

1038
00:48:08,600 --> 00:48:10,839
Speaker 5: Keeping my guard up from now, Thank you guys. There's

1039
00:48:10,880 --> 00:48:13,080
Speaker 5: some comments. So one of the comments says, good for

1040
00:48:13,120 --> 00:48:15,719
Speaker 5: you for standing your ground. Unaddressed phases, it becomes a

1041
00:48:15,760 --> 00:48:18,080
Speaker 5: way of life. Oh he doesn't know it, but you're

1042
00:48:18,120 --> 00:48:20,200
Speaker 5: the only one actually interested in helping your brother.

1043
00:48:20,280 --> 00:48:20,440
Speaker 1: Dude.

1044
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:21,080
Speaker 3: That's a good point.

1045
00:48:21,200 --> 00:48:23,200
Speaker 6: Bars the bars right there.

1046
00:48:23,360 --> 00:48:26,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, unaddressed phases become ways of life.

1047
00:48:26,360 --> 00:48:28,799
Speaker 6: Yeah, that's like an okay fortune right there.

1048
00:48:29,120 --> 00:48:30,799
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'll just kip to comment. But three.

1049
00:48:30,800 --> 00:48:34,040
Speaker 5: Also, people need to stop acting like teenagers are just kids,

1050
00:48:34,160 --> 00:48:36,359
Speaker 5: as if they simply don't know any better and can't

1051
00:48:36,360 --> 00:48:39,520
Speaker 5: help it. If they don't or can't, yes, they're still

1052
00:48:39,560 --> 00:48:41,680
Speaker 5: technically not adults, but that doesn't mean that they can

1053
00:48:41,719 --> 00:48:44,000
Speaker 5: do whatever they want without consequence. They're old enough to

1054
00:48:44,040 --> 00:48:46,640
Speaker 5: know better. Heck, ten is old enough to know better

1055
00:48:46,920 --> 00:48:50,680
Speaker 5: much of the time. I'm just so sick of enabling parents. Yeah, honestly,

1056
00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:51,719
Speaker 5: like what age do.

1057
00:48:51,640 --> 00:48:53,880
Speaker 6: You think it is really when you learn like stealing

1058
00:48:54,000 --> 00:48:57,760
Speaker 6: is bad? Five? Like what swipe or no swipe?

1059
00:48:57,800 --> 00:49:00,000
Speaker 5: As Yeah, exactly, And that's just the thing with parents,

1060
00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:03,160
Speaker 5: like at all. It's like, yeah, it's probably not gonna

1061
00:49:03,200 --> 00:49:05,319
Speaker 5: be much of an issue. However you have to still

1062
00:49:05,360 --> 00:49:08,320
Speaker 5: punish them for that and like hand get them in

1063
00:49:08,520 --> 00:49:11,560
Speaker 5: trouble because they have to learn that they can't do that.

1064
00:49:11,640 --> 00:49:13,600
Speaker 5: So it's like the same thing when this man is

1065
00:49:13,640 --> 00:49:17,880
Speaker 5: six seventeen, this is way like, yeah, this is not

1066
00:49:17,920 --> 00:49:19,520
Speaker 5: just a phase that you could just let pass, you

1067
00:49:19,560 --> 00:49:22,520
Speaker 5: know what I mean. Yeah, there's another update, so March twentieth.

1068
00:49:22,520 --> 00:49:25,360
Speaker 5: This is three days later now, so things have escalated

1069
00:49:25,360 --> 00:49:28,040
Speaker 5: a bit since my last update. My parents finally started

1070
00:49:28,040 --> 00:49:31,560
Speaker 5: taking things more seriously, but not in the way I expected.

1071
00:49:32,200 --> 00:49:34,839
Speaker 5: Instead of actually holding my brother accountable, they're now in

1072
00:49:34,920 --> 00:49:37,399
Speaker 5: full on damage control mode, acting like this whole thing

1073
00:49:37,480 --> 00:49:40,520
Speaker 5: is just a family issue that got blown out of proportion.

1074
00:49:40,680 --> 00:49:42,239
Speaker 5: A few days ago, my dad sat me down and

1075
00:49:42,280 --> 00:49:44,359
Speaker 5: basically told me that I need to let this go

1076
00:49:44,480 --> 00:49:47,040
Speaker 5: because my brother is apparently really struggling and I might

1077
00:49:47,120 --> 00:49:49,080
Speaker 5: think we're just by involving cops. He said that my

1078
00:49:49,120 --> 00:49:51,080
Speaker 5: brother feels like I betrayed him and that I should

1079
00:49:51,080 --> 00:49:53,080
Speaker 5: be the bigger person and try to fix the thing. Meanwhile,

1080
00:49:53,120 --> 00:49:56,759
Speaker 5: my brother, yeah, no, he hasn't apologized, hasn't even acknowledged

1081
00:49:56,800 --> 00:49:59,120
Speaker 5: what he did. He's just soulking around the house acting

1082
00:49:59,160 --> 00:50:01,319
Speaker 5: like I ruined his life, and now he's trying to

1083
00:50:01,320 --> 00:50:03,160
Speaker 5: turn things on me and telling family members that I

1084
00:50:03,239 --> 00:50:06,319
Speaker 5: overreacted and made things way worse than they were. I

1085
00:50:06,480 --> 00:50:08,879
Speaker 5: have completely checked out at this point. My parents are

1086
00:50:08,880 --> 00:50:11,440
Speaker 5: clearly more worried about keeping the peace than actually teaching

1087
00:50:11,480 --> 00:50:14,560
Speaker 5: them consequences, and I'm just tired of I'm looking at

1088
00:50:14,600 --> 00:50:16,799
Speaker 5: moving out sooner than I plan, because honestly, I don't

1089
00:50:16,800 --> 00:50:18,440
Speaker 5: feel like being in a house where my own stuff

1090
00:50:18,480 --> 00:50:21,080
Speaker 5: isn't safe, and I'm the bad guy for expecting a

1091
00:50:21,080 --> 00:50:23,879
Speaker 5: basic respect. Not sure if I'll update again, but yeah,

1092
00:50:24,040 --> 00:50:26,879
Speaker 5: that's where things stand. Didn't think calling out theft would

1093
00:50:26,960 --> 00:50:29,799
Speaker 5: turn into a full family drama, but here we are

1094
00:50:30,000 --> 00:50:33,120
Speaker 5: additional information. Didn't think standing up for myself would turn

1095
00:50:33,160 --> 00:50:35,200
Speaker 5: into a whole family crisis, but I guess expecting basic

1096
00:50:35,280 --> 00:50:36,359
Speaker 5: respect was too much to ask.

1097
00:50:36,440 --> 00:50:38,840
Speaker 3: That's kind of the same thing. But there are some comments.

1098
00:50:38,880 --> 00:50:41,359
Speaker 5: One of them says, they're saying to keep it in

1099
00:50:41,400 --> 00:50:45,240
Speaker 5: the family, right, I'm not seeing any specifications of immediate family.

1100
00:50:45,400 --> 00:50:48,120
Speaker 5: Maybe talk to some extended family and have them give

1101
00:50:48,160 --> 00:50:49,080
Speaker 5: their opinions as well.

1102
00:50:49,160 --> 00:50:49,360
Speaker 6: Come in.

1103
00:50:49,440 --> 00:50:50,520
Speaker 3: Number two says, turn it.

1104
00:50:50,480 --> 00:50:53,720
Speaker 5: Around, Ask dad, is it a bigger problem if brother

1105
00:50:54,160 --> 00:50:56,680
Speaker 5: learns that it's okay to steal or if he's hurt

1106
00:50:56,680 --> 00:50:58,000
Speaker 5: from a little valid feedback.

1107
00:50:58,080 --> 00:50:59,040
Speaker 3: That's a good point.

1108
00:50:59,080 --> 00:51:01,600
Speaker 7: Yeah, and brother learn it's not okay to steal when

1109
00:51:01,600 --> 00:51:05,960
Speaker 7: he gets inevitably arrested for you, exactly as an adult,

1110
00:51:06,200 --> 00:51:08,239
Speaker 7: exactly where they don't just go and we're going to

1111
00:51:08,280 --> 00:51:09,480
Speaker 7: give you a little warning.

1112
00:51:09,440 --> 00:51:10,680
Speaker 3: Right, the common continues.

1113
00:51:10,840 --> 00:51:12,640
Speaker 5: Or tell dad if he feels like it's no big deal,

1114
00:51:12,719 --> 00:51:14,280
Speaker 5: he can give you the three hundred dollars.

1115
00:51:14,400 --> 00:51:16,440
Speaker 3: Waked that up. See if he likes.

1116
00:51:16,239 --> 00:51:18,560
Speaker 5: Losing three hundred dollars, not the a hole. There's a

1117
00:51:18,600 --> 00:51:21,680
Speaker 5: few more comments, but yeah, basically say the same update.

1118
00:51:21,920 --> 00:51:26,319
Speaker 3: Now there is another off. Give any final thoughts really

1119
00:51:26,360 --> 00:51:27,239
Speaker 3: quick before we jump in.

1120
00:51:27,719 --> 00:51:31,360
Speaker 7: No accountability folks, pass it on. I mean, like, exactly

1121
00:51:31,400 --> 00:51:33,279
Speaker 7: if it was twenty bucks, I'd be like, you went

1122
00:51:33,320 --> 00:51:35,680
Speaker 7: too far. It's three hundred dollars and he's seventeen.

1123
00:51:35,880 --> 00:51:36,080
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1124
00:51:36,200 --> 00:51:38,640
Speaker 3: There is another update March twenty fourth, four days later.

1125
00:51:38,719 --> 00:51:40,960
Speaker 5: So I ended up having another conversation with my parents,

1126
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:43,520
Speaker 5: mostly because I couldn't keep walking around the house with

1127
00:51:43,560 --> 00:51:45,960
Speaker 5: this giant cloud over everything. I told him again that

1128
00:51:46,000 --> 00:51:47,879
Speaker 5: I'm not trying to ruin anyone's life. I just want

1129
00:51:47,880 --> 00:51:49,640
Speaker 5: to live in a home where my stuff doesn't get

1130
00:51:49,680 --> 00:51:51,840
Speaker 5: touched and I'm not made out to be the problem

1131
00:51:51,840 --> 00:51:53,960
Speaker 5: for setting a boundary. My mom kind of softened a

1132
00:51:53,960 --> 00:51:55,919
Speaker 5: bit and admitted that they might have been too quick

1133
00:51:55,920 --> 00:51:57,839
Speaker 5: to defend him, but she also said that they were

1134
00:51:57,880 --> 00:51:58,560
Speaker 5: just scared of.

1135
00:51:58,480 --> 00:52:01,120
Speaker 3: Pushing him further away. I get that, I really do.

1136
00:52:01,239 --> 00:52:03,360
Speaker 3: But I told her that protecting him doesn't mean ignoring

1137
00:52:03,360 --> 00:52:04,239
Speaker 3: the things that he's doing.

1138
00:52:04,280 --> 00:52:06,560
Speaker 7: And that's a cop out, dude, because you literally went

1139
00:52:06,640 --> 00:52:08,600
Speaker 7: to them and was like, hey, he stole my money,

1140
00:52:08,640 --> 00:52:10,719
Speaker 7: like we need to do something about this, and they thought, oh,

1141
00:52:10,760 --> 00:52:13,680
Speaker 7: he probably needed it for something. That's not being like.

1142
00:52:13,640 --> 00:52:15,080
Speaker 6: Well, I don't want to push him away. That's in

1143
00:52:15,080 --> 00:52:17,120
Speaker 6: a complete dismissal.

1144
00:52:16,600 --> 00:52:17,320
Speaker 3: Of an issue.

1145
00:52:17,360 --> 00:52:20,719
Speaker 5: Absolutely, my brother still hasn't apologized directly, but he did

1146
00:52:20,719 --> 00:52:23,120
Speaker 5: stop talking crap about me to the rest of the family.

1147
00:52:23,280 --> 00:52:25,279
Speaker 5: I think someone, maybe my aunt, told him that he

1148
00:52:25,320 --> 00:52:27,160
Speaker 5: was being immature and making it worse for himself.

1149
00:52:27,200 --> 00:52:27,600
Speaker 1: Good job.

1150
00:52:27,719 --> 00:52:31,640
Speaker 5: Since then, things have been quieter, not better, just less tense.

1151
00:52:31,880 --> 00:52:34,640
Speaker 5: I've started looking at part time jobs and roommate listening

1152
00:52:34,680 --> 00:52:36,600
Speaker 5: so I can move out sooner. I don't hate my family,

1153
00:52:36,680 --> 00:52:38,520
Speaker 5: I'm just tired of being treated like I'm the one

1154
00:52:38,560 --> 00:52:41,160
Speaker 5: who crossed the line for wanting basic trust and honestly

1155
00:52:41,239 --> 00:52:43,399
Speaker 5: in my open home anyway. I didn't think i'd post

1156
00:52:43,480 --> 00:52:45,439
Speaker 5: a third update, but I guess I wanted to say

1157
00:52:45,440 --> 00:52:47,759
Speaker 5: thank you to everyone who helped me feel like.

1158
00:52:47,719 --> 00:52:48,600
Speaker 3: I wasn't insane.

1159
00:52:48,719 --> 00:52:50,840
Speaker 5: Still kind of stinks, but at least now I know

1160
00:52:50,960 --> 00:52:53,240
Speaker 5: I'm not alone, and who knows, if things get weirder,

1161
00:52:53,400 --> 00:52:57,239
Speaker 5: maybe there'll be before. Another comment says moving out sounds like

1162
00:52:57,280 --> 00:52:59,759
Speaker 5: the healthiest option. You deserve peace, not tension in your

1163
00:52:59,760 --> 00:53:00,319
Speaker 5: own home.

1164
00:53:00,440 --> 00:53:01,359
Speaker 3: Comment to number two.

1165
00:53:01,280 --> 00:53:02,840
Speaker 5: Says, oh, pee, tell your mom that she doesn't have

1166
00:53:02,880 --> 00:53:05,040
Speaker 5: to worry about pushing him away because in less than

1167
00:53:05,040 --> 00:53:07,120
Speaker 5: three years he will be in prison and won't be

1168
00:53:07,120 --> 00:53:09,719
Speaker 5: able to get away from them. Tell her that they

1169
00:53:09,840 --> 00:53:12,960
Speaker 5: have created this monster, so don't act the victim when

1170
00:53:12,960 --> 00:53:15,880
Speaker 5: the spoiled, enabled and title boy becomes a spoiled, enabled,

1171
00:53:16,040 --> 00:53:16,680
Speaker 5: entitled man.

1172
00:53:16,800 --> 00:53:18,759
Speaker 3: But when you're an adult, it isn't just boys will

1173
00:53:18,760 --> 00:53:21,879
Speaker 3: be boys. Thing you steal, you go to jail, tell

1174
00:53:21,880 --> 00:53:23,600
Speaker 3: her that this is the future they have made for

1175
00:53:23,680 --> 00:53:24,239
Speaker 3: their son.

1176
00:53:25,440 --> 00:53:27,560
Speaker 7: The other thing is it's like, uh, I think someone

1177
00:53:27,560 --> 00:53:29,360
Speaker 7: said this earlier because it's like, well, it's like the

1178
00:53:29,440 --> 00:53:31,600
Speaker 7: comment of like, well, maybe he needed the money for something.

1179
00:53:31,600 --> 00:53:34,480
Speaker 7: It's like, yeah, I wonder what a seventeen year old

1180
00:53:34,520 --> 00:53:36,120
Speaker 7: would need three hundred dollars.

1181
00:53:35,920 --> 00:53:40,000
Speaker 6: For, probably nothing good. Yeah, Also too, what is he

1182
00:53:40,040 --> 00:53:41,280
Speaker 6: getting with three hundred bucks?

1183
00:53:41,320 --> 00:53:43,040
Speaker 5: Yeah? If he needed it so bad, then wouldn't you

1184
00:53:43,080 --> 00:53:45,680
Speaker 5: have spent it already? It was sitting on his deskled up.

1185
00:53:46,040 --> 00:53:49,160
Speaker 7: I mean, those are the times where people get into substances,

1186
00:53:49,440 --> 00:53:52,440
Speaker 7: They get into the drinking, they get into the whatever.

1187
00:53:52,760 --> 00:53:55,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's like, what's it like, if you money,

1188
00:53:56,040 --> 00:53:59,000
Speaker 3: then why wouldn't they be like, Okay, I'll give you

1189
00:53:59,040 --> 00:53:59,440
Speaker 3: the money.

1190
00:53:59,480 --> 00:54:01,719
Speaker 5: Oh as your parents will give you the money if

1191
00:54:01,760 --> 00:54:03,480
Speaker 5: you really need it, right, It's like if you if

1192
00:54:03,480 --> 00:54:04,239
Speaker 5: this isn't like a.

1193
00:54:04,280 --> 00:54:06,680
Speaker 1: Oh I really don't want to upgrade my PC.

1194
00:54:06,920 --> 00:54:09,759
Speaker 7: It's like it's like, uh, who knows, or maybe he's

1195
00:54:09,840 --> 00:54:12,200
Speaker 7: just a thief, and it's like, you know, people develop

1196
00:54:12,239 --> 00:54:14,799
Speaker 7: a thing where it's like I just like I like

1197
00:54:15,000 --> 00:54:16,680
Speaker 7: taking things that aren't mine.

1198
00:54:16,920 --> 00:54:19,320
Speaker 6: Exactly exactly anyone seen Tintin.

1199
00:54:19,520 --> 00:54:22,480
Speaker 3: But I mean that last comment there was the end

1200
00:54:22,520 --> 00:54:26,760
Speaker 3: of the story. So that was it.

1201
00:54:26,840 --> 00:54:30,720
Speaker 5: But by the way, if you check us out on iHeartRadio,

1202
00:54:30,840 --> 00:54:34,439
Speaker 5: Apple Podcasts, Spotify, whatever your favorite podcast is to find

1203
00:54:34,640 --> 00:54:37,200
Speaker 5: more episodes with full stories just like this one.

1204
00:54:37,280 --> 00:54:42,640
Speaker 3: Just go to your favorite podcast and story. Yeah.

1205
00:54:43,719 --> 00:54:45,799
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam, your og host here. Bring it back

1206
00:54:45,800 --> 00:54:47,920
Speaker 1: to the stories. But here's three minutes bads from our sponsor.

1207
00:54:48,480 --> 00:54:51,200
Speaker 3: My wife is obsessed with going to Disney World, and

1208
00:54:51,280 --> 00:54:52,759
Speaker 3: I'm so tired of it.

1209
00:54:53,160 --> 00:54:56,080
Speaker 4: I'll go with your wife. Yeah, I'll marry your wife.

1210
00:54:56,080 --> 00:54:57,840
Speaker 4: That's fine. I'm I'm not a Disney adult. I'm I

1211
00:54:57,840 --> 00:55:00,120
Speaker 4: got dox myself, but I love Disney my if.

1212
00:55:00,280 --> 00:55:03,400
Speaker 3: Jess and I have been married for the past thirteen years.

1213
00:55:03,400 --> 00:55:07,040
Speaker 3: We're both thirty nine. After experiencing financial hardship throughout our

1214
00:55:07,080 --> 00:55:09,640
Speaker 3: twenties and early thirties, Jess and I are now fortunate

1215
00:55:09,760 --> 00:55:11,799
Speaker 3: enough to have the means to travel once or twice

1216
00:55:11,800 --> 00:55:14,840
Speaker 3: a year. The only problem is that Jess literally only

1217
00:55:14,880 --> 00:55:16,759
Speaker 3: wants to go to Disney World. We have been to

1218
00:55:16,800 --> 00:55:20,279
Speaker 3: Disney nine times now, and every vacation we have ever

1219
00:55:20,400 --> 00:55:23,280
Speaker 3: taken together it was to go there, including our honeymoon.

1220
00:55:23,600 --> 00:55:26,200
Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from either Ambassador of fifty

1221
00:55:26,200 --> 00:55:27,800
Speaker 3: four and if you want to submit your own stories,

1222
00:55:27,840 --> 00:55:30,560
Speaker 3: go to our slash. Okay, storytime separate it. So we go.

1223
00:55:30,880 --> 00:55:33,840
Speaker 3: We eat Mickey Mouse ice cream, we wear the mouse ears,

1224
00:55:33,920 --> 00:55:37,239
Speaker 3: we stay in the official hotels. Ok We see the characters,

1225
00:55:37,440 --> 00:55:40,040
Speaker 3: we ride the rides, we take pictures in front of

1226
00:55:40,040 --> 00:55:42,960
Speaker 3: Cinderella's castle, and we come home every.

1227
00:55:42,760 --> 00:55:45,080
Speaker 4: Trip perfect day. I hope you come home after the trip.

1228
00:55:45,480 --> 00:55:46,160
Speaker 4: Where are you going to go?

1229
00:55:46,400 --> 00:55:49,760
Speaker 3: I'm honestly beyond sick of Disney, and I never really

1230
00:55:49,800 --> 00:55:52,239
Speaker 3: like going in the first place. Jess knows this, but

1231
00:55:52,320 --> 00:55:55,359
Speaker 3: she has no concept of travel beyond Disney. We are

1232
00:55:55,520 --> 00:55:58,080
Speaker 3: currently planning a trip for April, and Jess, as usual,

1233
00:55:58,200 --> 00:56:00,600
Speaker 3: said that we can just go to Disney. I explained

1234
00:56:00,640 --> 00:56:02,680
Speaker 3: that it sounds fun, but hey, why don't we go

1235
00:56:02,760 --> 00:56:05,879
Speaker 3: somewhere like Hawaii? This time Jess was confused. She asked

1236
00:56:05,920 --> 00:56:07,880
Speaker 3: why we would go to Hawaite. I responded that we

1237
00:56:07,880 --> 00:56:10,279
Speaker 3: could enjoy the spas and go to the beach. Jess

1238
00:56:10,320 --> 00:56:13,279
Speaker 3: mumbled a half hearted answer and walked away. A few

1239
00:56:13,360 --> 00:56:16,000
Speaker 3: days later, she approached me saying that she made hotel

1240
00:56:16,080 --> 00:56:19,080
Speaker 3: reservations for Hawaii. At first, I was excited because although

1241
00:56:19,120 --> 00:56:21,440
Speaker 3: she did so without consulting me, it seemed like she

1242
00:56:21,520 --> 00:56:22,360
Speaker 3: was really listening.

1243
00:56:22,400 --> 00:56:23,120
Speaker 1: I think I know where.

1244
00:56:24,520 --> 00:56:26,720
Speaker 3: But then when she showed me the hotel she booked,

1245
00:56:26,719 --> 00:56:30,360
Speaker 3: I found she had made reservations for Alani, the Disney

1246
00:56:30,440 --> 00:56:31,800
Speaker 3: resort in Hawaii.

1247
00:56:31,960 --> 00:56:32,400
Speaker 1: I knew it.

1248
00:56:32,480 --> 00:56:32,880
Speaker 4: I knew it.

1249
00:56:33,120 --> 00:56:36,040
Speaker 3: Drive me crazy if I had already expressed to my partner,

1250
00:56:36,320 --> 00:56:39,440
Speaker 3: Hey like, Disney's fun, but let's try something new, let's

1251
00:56:39,480 --> 00:56:41,719
Speaker 3: go to a different place. And they're like yeah, and

1252
00:56:41,760 --> 00:56:44,960
Speaker 3: then still chose the one Disney thing.

1253
00:56:45,280 --> 00:56:48,040
Speaker 4: Can we say this? Can we say that sound sponsorship?

1254
00:56:48,040 --> 00:56:48,560
Speaker 3: It's a hate?

1255
00:56:48,600 --> 00:56:52,160
Speaker 4: Oh okay, well I'm gonna say yeah that your wife

1256
00:56:52,400 --> 00:56:53,760
Speaker 4: is one of those Disney adults.

1257
00:56:54,000 --> 00:56:56,040
Speaker 3: I think she's like literally has an addiction.

1258
00:56:56,239 --> 00:56:58,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's an addiction that to not be.

1259
00:56:58,120 --> 00:57:00,320
Speaker 3: Able to go to any other place is so actially

1260
00:57:00,320 --> 00:57:01,600
Speaker 3: when you know your partner doesn't like it.

1261
00:57:01,719 --> 00:57:04,240
Speaker 4: Listen, get, I get. It's the most magical place on earth. Yeah,

1262
00:57:04,280 --> 00:57:05,680
Speaker 4: there are other places you can go.

1263
00:57:05,920 --> 00:57:08,000
Speaker 3: You got to expand your horizons.

1264
00:57:07,520 --> 00:57:09,640
Speaker 4: Especially that she's not being fair to you. Yeah, because

1265
00:57:09,680 --> 00:57:12,080
Speaker 4: you're going to what she wants to do exactly and

1266
00:57:12,320 --> 00:57:13,000
Speaker 4: you're tired of it.

1267
00:57:13,040 --> 00:57:15,040
Speaker 3: Like at that point, I'd be like, girl, you can

1268
00:57:15,080 --> 00:57:16,760
Speaker 3: do it if you want, but I'm going to y

1269
00:57:17,000 --> 00:57:21,280
Speaker 3: Murray universal Frustrated. I told her that I'm honestly tired

1270
00:57:21,320 --> 00:57:23,360
Speaker 3: of Disney and that I just want to have different

1271
00:57:23,440 --> 00:57:26,560
Speaker 3: experiences this time. She told me that she was compromising

1272
00:57:26,640 --> 00:57:29,080
Speaker 3: with me. It's not a compromise and that I should

1273
00:57:29,080 --> 00:57:31,680
Speaker 3: be appreciative for the time she spent. I asked her

1274
00:57:31,720 --> 00:57:34,200
Speaker 3: if she was willing to consider anything other than Disney

1275
00:57:34,200 --> 00:57:36,200
Speaker 3: for our trip, and she said no. At this point,

1276
00:57:36,240 --> 00:57:39,400
Speaker 3: I said that I wasn't going. Now she's furious, she

1277
00:57:39,600 --> 00:57:42,080
Speaker 3: canceled the reservation she made, and now she's looking for

1278
00:57:42,120 --> 00:57:45,120
Speaker 3: a friend to go to Disney World with again without me.

1279
00:57:45,560 --> 00:57:47,360
Speaker 3: Was I the a hole here for not trying to

1280
00:57:47,400 --> 00:57:48,680
Speaker 3: accommodate her request?

1281
00:57:49,000 --> 00:57:50,080
Speaker 4: No?

1282
00:57:50,080 --> 00:57:54,080
Speaker 3: No, no, because you've already accommodated nine times and you said, hey,

1283
00:57:54,160 --> 00:57:56,720
Speaker 3: let's go somewhere else. And she tried to trick you

1284
00:57:57,040 --> 00:57:59,400
Speaker 3: and then didn't at all listen to you when you said, hey,

1285
00:57:59,400 --> 00:58:00,520
Speaker 3: I like, I don't want.

1286
00:58:00,400 --> 00:58:00,640
Speaker 2: To do that.

1287
00:58:00,640 --> 00:58:03,320
Speaker 4: When he said Hawaii, I knew about the Hawaii Hotel

1288
00:58:03,360 --> 00:58:04,040
Speaker 4: and I was like, all.

1289
00:58:04,120 --> 00:58:06,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's like, let's go to France, and she's like.

1290
00:58:05,960 --> 00:58:09,880
Speaker 4: Okay, we're going to go to the European Japan.

1291
00:58:10,320 --> 00:58:11,640
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1292
00:58:11,400 --> 00:58:14,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, It's just like, that's not that No, No. Disney.

1293
00:58:14,560 --> 00:58:16,840
Speaker 3: Commenter one says, how the f did this go on

1294
00:58:16,960 --> 00:58:19,800
Speaker 3: for nine trips without you saying something? I'd have gone

1295
00:58:19,800 --> 00:58:22,800
Speaker 3: mad after going a second time. Commoner two says, uh,

1296
00:58:23,080 --> 00:58:25,640
Speaker 3: does she realize there's a whole non Disney world out

1297
00:58:25,640 --> 00:58:28,640
Speaker 3: there and as and it's much less expensive with shorter.

1298
00:58:28,400 --> 00:58:31,600
Speaker 4: Line, I can show you the world I can't.

1299
00:58:32,080 --> 00:58:35,120
Speaker 3: Commoner three, However, you should also consider being more truthful

1300
00:58:35,160 --> 00:58:37,080
Speaker 3: with your wife. If you can't even be truthful to

1301
00:58:37,120 --> 00:58:39,680
Speaker 3: your wife, who can you be truthful with? It Obviously

1302
00:58:39,720 --> 00:58:41,760
Speaker 3: did not sound fun at all to you, so just

1303
00:58:41,800 --> 00:58:44,080
Speaker 3: be clear on that. In fact, the second time she

1304
00:58:44,120 --> 00:58:45,920
Speaker 3: booked the Disney trip, you should have been honest with

1305
00:58:45,960 --> 00:58:48,560
Speaker 3: her and suggested something else. Common Er four says, at

1306
00:58:48,560 --> 00:58:51,200
Speaker 3: thirty nine, it might be time to consider broadening her

1307
00:58:51,240 --> 00:58:54,200
Speaker 3: horizons and embracing more of what the world has to offer.

1308
00:58:54,280 --> 00:58:56,720
Speaker 3: Life is too short to be spent solely between home

1309
00:58:56,760 --> 00:58:59,080
Speaker 3: and Disney when there's so much out there waiting to

1310
00:58:59,120 --> 00:59:01,280
Speaker 3: be explored. And there is an update. But yeah, I

1311
00:59:01,280 --> 00:59:04,680
Speaker 3: think it's like, sometimes you find it's really hard traveling

1312
00:59:04,680 --> 00:59:07,960
Speaker 3: with people who have just like the opposite travel styles

1313
00:59:08,040 --> 00:59:11,160
Speaker 3: to you, and this is like the most opposite, because yeah,

1314
00:59:11,160 --> 00:59:13,640
Speaker 3: it's just Disney World, because like for me, I don't

1315
00:59:13,680 --> 00:59:15,720
Speaker 3: like going on trips where it's just like like he

1316
00:59:15,800 --> 00:59:17,480
Speaker 3: was saying, Oh, I want to go to a spa

1317
00:59:17,520 --> 00:59:19,920
Speaker 3: and like resort on. That's not my travel style. I

1318
00:59:19,920 --> 00:59:21,600
Speaker 3: would not like to do that. And it seems like

1319
00:59:21,760 --> 00:59:23,320
Speaker 3: she only wants to go to Disney World and.

1320
00:59:23,280 --> 00:59:26,280
Speaker 4: You don't like to do that, so like, hey, let's

1321
00:59:26,320 --> 00:59:27,560
Speaker 4: do what you want to do and then we'll do

1322
00:59:27,640 --> 00:59:29,720
Speaker 4: it when I will. Would you compromise? It's very selfish

1323
00:59:29,760 --> 00:59:31,160
Speaker 4: of her, It's very selfish.

1324
00:59:31,280 --> 00:59:33,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, But there is an update. About a week ago,

1325
00:59:33,440 --> 00:59:35,480
Speaker 3: I made a post about an argument my wife Jess

1326
00:59:35,520 --> 00:59:37,640
Speaker 3: and I had. The TLDR version of it is just

1327
00:59:37,760 --> 00:59:39,760
Speaker 3: loves going to Disney World and we have gone there

1328
00:59:39,760 --> 00:59:42,400
Speaker 3: for literally every trip during our marriage, which is now

1329
00:59:42,480 --> 00:59:45,080
Speaker 3: at an impressive nine times. When I asked Jess if

1330
00:59:45,080 --> 00:59:48,120
Speaker 3: we could go somewhere like Hawaii, she suggested Alani, the

1331
00:59:48,120 --> 00:59:51,440
Speaker 3: Disney resort, and I dismissed the idea immediately. This upset Jess.

1332
00:59:51,560 --> 00:59:54,560
Speaker 3: Here is the update I screwed up. I know most

1333
00:59:54,600 --> 00:59:56,640
Speaker 3: people were giving me the not the a whole judgment,

1334
00:59:56,720 --> 00:59:59,120
Speaker 3: but Jess actually showed a great deal of openness to

1335
00:59:59,160 --> 01:00:02,200
Speaker 3: my idea. Took a initiative by reserving the hotel because

1336
01:00:02,240 --> 01:00:04,360
Speaker 3: she wanted me to be happy. When I said Nope,

1337
01:00:04,400 --> 01:00:06,720
Speaker 3: no Disney, she felt that I hadn't put any effort

1338
01:00:06,760 --> 01:00:08,640
Speaker 3: into taking her feelings into consideration.

1339
01:00:09,120 --> 01:00:13,880
Speaker 4: You're being ghastly and you're following for it. You for it,

1340
01:00:14,040 --> 01:00:14,840
Speaker 4: you felt for it.

1341
01:00:14,880 --> 01:00:17,840
Speaker 3: She's not taking your feelings into considerations. She's trying to

1342
01:00:17,960 --> 01:00:19,120
Speaker 3: slip one past.

1343
01:00:19,240 --> 01:00:22,000
Speaker 4: Yet she's making you feel bad because you're like, oh, yeah, that's.

1344
01:00:22,040 --> 01:00:25,880
Speaker 3: She's pouting in the corner, going I did this for you. No,

1345
01:00:26,240 --> 01:00:28,640
Speaker 3: she did it for her, and she was completely right.

1346
01:00:28,880 --> 01:00:31,760
Speaker 3: I hadn't. It was, in a twisted way, my form

1347
01:00:31,800 --> 01:00:34,800
Speaker 3: of revenge for dragging me to Disney World all those times.

1348
01:00:34,880 --> 01:00:37,200
Speaker 3: In the last post, some people commented about how Alani

1349
01:00:37,280 --> 01:00:40,120
Speaker 3: barely even looks like a Disney resort at all. This

1350
01:00:40,240 --> 01:00:42,840
Speaker 3: is something I should have researched myself before I threw

1351
01:00:42,880 --> 01:00:45,400
Speaker 3: the gauntlet down with Jess. When I looked into it,

1352
01:00:45,400 --> 01:00:47,360
Speaker 3: it looks like a run of the mill Hawaiian resort.

1353
01:00:47,680 --> 01:00:50,200
Speaker 3: In my defense, going to Disney World nine times has

1354
01:00:50,320 --> 01:00:52,680
Speaker 3: kind of made me sensitive, and I'm fairly sure that

1355
01:00:52,760 --> 01:00:55,680
Speaker 3: on urshock test i'd see nothing but mouse ears at

1356
01:00:55,680 --> 01:00:57,920
Speaker 3: this point. Yes, but I really should not have jumped

1357
01:00:57,960 --> 01:01:00,920
Speaker 3: to conclusions. A day after I made the I approached

1358
01:01:01,000 --> 01:01:03,080
Speaker 3: Jess and apologized I was wrong.

1359
01:01:03,240 --> 01:01:10,120
Speaker 2: No, No, it's so hard like this job.

1360
01:01:11,040 --> 01:01:13,640
Speaker 3: Yes, she might be a Disney adult, but aside from

1361
01:01:13,680 --> 01:01:16,040
Speaker 3: always wanting to go to their theme parks, she's never

1362
01:01:16,120 --> 01:01:19,040
Speaker 3: obnoxious about it. I said I was sorry again and

1363
01:01:19,120 --> 01:01:21,640
Speaker 3: asked for permission to preserve the hotel again, and Jess

1364
01:01:21,640 --> 01:01:23,920
Speaker 3: responded that she'd love to go to Elanie with me

1365
01:01:24,120 --> 01:01:25,720
Speaker 3: when I told her that it's not really all that

1366
01:01:25,840 --> 01:01:28,400
Speaker 3: Disney just said. Of course, I knew that I wanted

1367
01:01:28,400 --> 01:01:30,360
Speaker 3: to go because my sister said it was beautiful.

1368
01:01:30,400 --> 01:01:31,080
Speaker 2: It's a nightmare.

1369
01:01:31,160 --> 01:01:32,080
Speaker 4: This is a nightmare.

1370
01:01:32,360 --> 01:01:36,120
Speaker 3: I'm a moron. Yeah, that's true, Jess and I have

1371
01:01:36,200 --> 01:01:39,040
Speaker 3: replanned our vacation and we're super excited to be going now.

1372
01:01:39,160 --> 01:01:41,320
Speaker 3: I came to this realization because a lot of people

1373
01:01:41,360 --> 01:01:43,800
Speaker 3: pointed out some things I should have figured out myself.

1374
01:01:43,920 --> 01:01:47,560
Speaker 3: Thank you comments. Who are I think saying what we're saying?

1375
01:01:47,680 --> 01:01:52,320
Speaker 3: Commoner one? Man? Did you get gaslot nine FFing vacations

1376
01:01:52,320 --> 01:01:54,400
Speaker 3: in a road to Disney? Did she take your feelings

1377
01:01:54,440 --> 01:01:57,760
Speaker 3: into account any of those nine times? Nope? Common Er two,

1378
01:01:57,880 --> 01:01:59,960
Speaker 3: what do you mean she's never been obnoxious about it?

1379
01:02:00,080 --> 01:02:02,760
Speaker 3: She dragged you to Disney nine times in your marriage,

1380
01:02:03,000 --> 01:02:05,720
Speaker 3: ignoring your communicating that you wanted to go somewhere else

1381
01:02:05,960 --> 01:02:08,720
Speaker 3: when you put your foot down, she scheduled the tenth

1382
01:02:08,960 --> 01:02:12,080
Speaker 3: Disney vacation, just at a different Disney location.

1383
01:02:12,320 --> 01:02:12,560
Speaker 1: I like.

1384
01:02:12,840 --> 01:02:15,000
Speaker 4: I like this line. The next line is this even?

1385
01:02:15,080 --> 01:02:17,440
Speaker 3: Ope? Did she tie you up and gag you with

1386
01:02:17,520 --> 01:02:20,600
Speaker 3: Mickey mouse ears typing on your account? Because her behavior

1387
01:02:20,680 --> 01:02:23,360
Speaker 3: is not okay? And a tenth Disney trip when you

1388
01:02:23,440 --> 01:02:26,640
Speaker 3: said no more Disney is zero compromise on her part.

1389
01:02:26,720 --> 01:02:31,280
Speaker 3: Do you need to be extracted? You need to communicate respectfully, calmly,

1390
01:02:31,640 --> 01:02:34,280
Speaker 3: and like adults. Maybe this is a good bridge to

1391
01:02:34,400 --> 01:02:38,680
Speaker 3: less Disney centric vacations. Maybe not, but unless you communicate

1392
01:02:38,720 --> 01:02:41,520
Speaker 3: your frustrations, you're going to be going to something Disney

1393
01:02:41,600 --> 01:02:46,040
Speaker 3: theme next time. To update two, Hi again everybody. This

1394
01:02:46,120 --> 01:02:48,520
Speaker 3: situation all started because my wife, Essin and I had

1395
01:02:48,520 --> 01:02:51,240
Speaker 3: an argument about going to Disney World on vacation again.

1396
01:02:51,360 --> 01:02:53,480
Speaker 3: I didn't want to go because we had already been

1397
01:02:53,600 --> 01:02:57,120
Speaker 3: nine times. And when I suggested why just made reservations

1398
01:02:57,120 --> 01:03:00,000
Speaker 3: for Alannie, which is a Disney owned resort, HI immediately

1399
01:03:00,080 --> 01:03:03,360
Speaker 3: he rejected this idea, mistakenly believing it was just another

1400
01:03:03,400 --> 01:03:06,640
Speaker 3: Disney vacation. Eventually, I realized that I was wrong and

1401
01:03:06,680 --> 01:03:10,080
Speaker 3: that Alanni was a perfectly fine compromise. Unfortunately, we're not

1402
01:03:10,280 --> 01:03:13,440
Speaker 3: going to Alani for our upcoming vacation. A couple of

1403
01:03:13,560 --> 01:03:16,680
Speaker 3: days after Christmas, Jess had a minor car accident. She

1404
01:03:16,760 --> 01:03:20,160
Speaker 3: mistook the drive for reverse and backed into her garage door.

1405
01:03:21,120 --> 01:03:22,280
Speaker 2: What okay?

1406
01:03:22,400 --> 01:03:24,720
Speaker 3: And I found Jess holding her neck in the car. Oh.

1407
01:03:24,720 --> 01:03:26,960
Speaker 3: When I heard the lound bang, I ran outside and

1408
01:03:27,000 --> 01:03:29,160
Speaker 3: I found Jess holding her neck in the car. I

1409
01:03:29,160 --> 01:03:31,520
Speaker 3: immediately drove her to the hospital where she got X

1410
01:03:31,600 --> 01:03:34,000
Speaker 3: raised one. She seemed fine, but the doctor said that

1411
01:03:34,040 --> 01:03:37,760
Speaker 3: based on her symptoms, headache, neck pain, numbness in her fingers.

1412
01:03:37,880 --> 01:03:39,040
Speaker 3: She could have whiplashed.

1413
01:03:40,320 --> 01:03:42,600
Speaker 4: How hard did she If you're backing your car up

1414
01:03:42,680 --> 01:03:45,400
Speaker 4: like you press the pedal, you could back up pretty ding.

1415
01:03:46,280 --> 01:03:48,320
Speaker 3: Jess and I figured that she would be fine in

1416
01:03:48,360 --> 01:03:50,800
Speaker 3: a couple of days, but almost two weeks later, she

1417
01:03:50,920 --> 01:03:54,120
Speaker 3: is still complaining about back pain. Yesterday, she approached me

1418
01:03:54,240 --> 01:03:56,760
Speaker 3: saying that she wasn't confident she could go to Hawaii

1419
01:03:56,760 --> 01:03:57,440
Speaker 3: in a few months.

1420
01:03:57,840 --> 01:04:02,040
Speaker 4: A few months. No no no, Sophia, no no no

1421
01:04:02,040 --> 01:04:06,360
Speaker 4: no no no no, Sophia, donner no, do not do not.

1422
01:04:07,480 --> 01:04:08,160
Speaker 3: I see you.

1423
01:04:08,520 --> 01:04:12,240
Speaker 2: Oh read it? Read it please?

1424
01:04:12,320 --> 01:04:16,240
Speaker 3: I asked what she wanted to do, and while apologizing profusely,

1425
01:04:16,320 --> 01:04:18,560
Speaker 3: she asked me if we could postpone that trip. I

1426
01:04:18,640 --> 01:04:22,360
Speaker 3: responded that she's absolutely nothing to apologize for. After that,

1427
01:04:22,560 --> 01:04:25,120
Speaker 3: she said that she felt bad about not being able

1428
01:04:25,160 --> 01:04:28,200
Speaker 3: to go to Hawaii, but she might be able to

1429
01:04:28,280 --> 01:04:35,240
Speaker 3: make it to Disney World. You freaking liar, You freaking liar.

1430
01:04:35,760 --> 01:04:39,520
Speaker 3: She set it all up. She didn't have wit lash,

1431
01:04:39,800 --> 01:04:41,800
Speaker 3: or if she did, it went away after a couple

1432
01:04:41,880 --> 01:04:46,960
Speaker 3: of days. And I've had with blas, I've had whiplash.

1433
01:04:47,000 --> 01:04:50,280
Speaker 3: I was in a car accident on a freeway, and

1434
01:04:50,640 --> 01:04:53,840
Speaker 3: I probably had worse whiplash than her. It went away

1435
01:04:53,880 --> 01:04:57,680
Speaker 3: after at most a week. An yeah, I know a

1436
01:04:57,720 --> 01:04:59,400
Speaker 3: person who had it for like a month. There's no

1437
01:04:59,520 --> 01:05:02,760
Speaker 3: way that she backing into a car like a garage

1438
01:05:02,920 --> 01:05:04,840
Speaker 3: would have had it for more than a week.

1439
01:05:04,960 --> 01:05:06,040
Speaker 2: Who is this woman?

1440
01:05:06,440 --> 01:05:09,280
Speaker 3: Liar well, I didn't understand at first. She told me

1441
01:05:09,320 --> 01:05:12,040
Speaker 3: that it has a very high accessibility and in worst

1442
01:05:12,040 --> 01:05:16,240
Speaker 3: case scenarios, ecv rentals. She doubts that will be necessary,

1443
01:05:16,280 --> 01:05:18,240
Speaker 3: but assured me that we could take it there. I

1444
01:05:18,360 --> 01:05:22,000
Speaker 3: know that this isn't the conclusion people here wanted, and

1445
01:05:22,040 --> 01:05:24,240
Speaker 3: it's certainly not what I wanted to do with my

1446
01:05:24,320 --> 01:05:27,560
Speaker 3: next vacation, but Jess's health has to come first here,

1447
01:05:27,720 --> 01:05:28,440
Speaker 3: you idiot.

1448
01:05:28,720 --> 01:05:29,960
Speaker 4: I'm gonna pull a Sophia.

1449
01:05:30,040 --> 01:05:33,200
Speaker 3: You're an idiot. We've made our reservations. It's not where

1450
01:05:33,200 --> 01:05:36,560
Speaker 3: I want to go, but just is super happy right now. Shocking.

1451
01:05:37,000 --> 01:05:38,880
Speaker 3: This is not shocking. This is not and that's what

1452
01:05:38,960 --> 01:05:41,040
Speaker 3: matters most to me. Thank you for all your input,

1453
01:05:41,080 --> 01:05:44,080
Speaker 3: which you didn't listen to comment or one. A resort

1454
01:05:44,320 --> 01:05:47,920
Speaker 3: is infinitely more relaxing and easier than Disney, even for

1455
01:05:48,080 --> 01:05:51,040
Speaker 3: non injured people. I think you got played, buddy, Disney

1456
01:05:51,080 --> 01:05:54,320
Speaker 3: adults be scheme and Commoner two says, dang, she's good

1457
01:05:54,360 --> 01:05:56,760
Speaker 3: a master manipulator. Time to get out, bro, or you

1458
01:05:56,840 --> 01:05:59,280
Speaker 3: gotta be miserable for the rest of your life. Commonda

1459
01:05:59,320 --> 01:06:01,840
Speaker 3: three says, she literally did that on purpose. LMO, you

1460
01:06:01,960 --> 01:06:04,480
Speaker 3: keep getting sucked into it, and you'll get sucked into

1461
01:06:04,480 --> 01:06:06,680
Speaker 3: it because you have no backbone. Good luck with the

1462
01:06:06,720 --> 01:06:08,560
Speaker 3: rest of your life. And there is an update.

1463
01:06:08,920 --> 01:06:11,200
Speaker 4: There is an update, and this is the most aggravating

1464
01:06:11,200 --> 01:06:12,240
Speaker 4: story I think we've ever read.

1465
01:06:12,360 --> 01:06:15,760
Speaker 3: If this update isn't, I'm so my wife tricked me

1466
01:06:15,800 --> 01:06:17,680
Speaker 3: into going to Disney, and I realized, and then I,

1467
01:06:18,000 --> 01:06:20,680
Speaker 3: you know, separated from her because I realized that she's

1468
01:06:20,880 --> 01:06:23,720
Speaker 3: gaslit me throughout all of our time together. Then I

1469
01:06:23,760 --> 01:06:24,440
Speaker 3: don't want it.

1470
01:06:24,520 --> 01:06:28,160
Speaker 4: Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice. Shame

1471
01:06:28,240 --> 01:06:31,120
Speaker 4: on Hugh full me three times. You're just a fool

1472
01:06:31,400 --> 01:06:32,360
Speaker 4: Update three.

1473
01:06:33,000 --> 01:06:36,600
Speaker 3: So long story short. Last week, Jess overplayed her hand.

1474
01:06:36,920 --> 01:06:40,560
Speaker 3: I'm sorry. That was the most obvious plot I've ever seen.

1475
01:06:40,960 --> 01:06:43,320
Speaker 3: Even before that, I found her recounting of the car

1476
01:06:43,360 --> 01:06:46,360
Speaker 3: accident and the extent of her injuries suspicious. When she

1477
01:06:46,400 --> 01:06:49,040
Speaker 3: doesn't know I'm watching. She moves normally, we'll pick things

1478
01:06:49,080 --> 01:06:53,080
Speaker 3: up off the floor, and generally seems perfectly healthy. When

1479
01:06:53,080 --> 01:06:56,600
Speaker 3: she sees me nearby, she exaggerates every movement, holds her

1480
01:06:56,600 --> 01:07:00,200
Speaker 3: lower back and limbs well. On Saturday, Jess approach to

1481
01:07:00,240 --> 01:07:03,760
Speaker 3: me saying that she wanted to move. I wonder where

1482
01:07:03,840 --> 01:07:08,320
Speaker 3: she wants to move to, perhaps sunny Florida. This made

1483
01:07:08,360 --> 01:07:11,160
Speaker 3: no sense. We had so little money throughout our twenties

1484
01:07:11,160 --> 01:07:13,960
Speaker 3: and early thirties, and now we're financially well off, solely

1485
01:07:14,000 --> 01:07:16,120
Speaker 3: because I finally have an amazing job in her area.

1486
01:07:16,320 --> 01:07:18,840
Speaker 3: Jess that she understood this, but she argued that she

1487
01:07:18,920 --> 01:07:21,760
Speaker 3: wanted to live closer to her parents. She asked me

1488
01:07:21,960 --> 01:07:24,560
Speaker 3: to move to Orlando with her. So, first off, her

1489
01:07:24,600 --> 01:07:27,600
Speaker 3: parents do not live in Orlando. They live in Atlanta,

1490
01:07:27,640 --> 01:07:30,880
Speaker 3: no Way, which is smack dab right in between where

1491
01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:32,440
Speaker 3: we currently live in Orlando.

1492
01:07:32,560 --> 01:07:33,360
Speaker 4: She's psychotic.

1493
01:07:33,640 --> 01:07:36,160
Speaker 3: Jess cited there being more flight options, and then she

1494
01:07:36,240 --> 01:07:39,120
Speaker 3: tackled on that she may have a job opportunity in Orlando.

1495
01:07:39,280 --> 01:07:41,000
Speaker 3: When I asked her to show me the job, she

1496
01:07:41,040 --> 01:07:44,640
Speaker 3: showed me a sixteen dollars per hour sales associate position

1497
01:07:44,720 --> 01:07:47,760
Speaker 3: for a sector where she has absolutely zero knowledge and experience.

1498
01:07:47,920 --> 01:07:50,520
Speaker 3: That's a terrible job prospect. I'm sorry, you're moving for

1499
01:07:50,640 --> 01:07:54,440
Speaker 3: sixteen dollars an hour. That's like, that's the that's terrible.

1500
01:07:54,520 --> 01:07:57,120
Speaker 3: This is insane. Why would you move for minimum wage?

1501
01:07:57,280 --> 01:07:58,000
Speaker 4: This is insane.

1502
01:07:58,160 --> 01:07:59,680
Speaker 3: I mean, actually, I don't know if that's minimum wage

1503
01:07:59,680 --> 01:08:05,080
Speaker 3: in Florida. I'm not proud of this, but I snapped, Finally, brother, finally.

1504
01:08:04,640 --> 01:08:06,480
Speaker 4: What did you say? Okay?

1505
01:08:06,720 --> 01:08:08,800
Speaker 3: I told her she just wanted to move closer to

1506
01:08:08,920 --> 01:08:11,480
Speaker 3: Disney World, that she was tearing our lives up so

1507
01:08:11,480 --> 01:08:13,840
Speaker 3: she could go take pictures with Disney princesses, and that

1508
01:08:13,880 --> 01:08:17,400
Speaker 3: she was a horrible life. All true, all true facts.

1509
01:08:17,680 --> 01:08:20,160
Speaker 3: Just deny this naturally. And she told me that she's

1510
01:08:20,200 --> 01:08:22,719
Speaker 3: moving to Orlando with or without me because her parents

1511
01:08:22,760 --> 01:08:26,240
Speaker 3: need her. Okay, bye, let her go, dude, let her go.

1512
01:08:26,840 --> 01:08:29,439
Speaker 3: But you know what I would never do without you, guys,

1513
01:08:29,880 --> 01:08:32,640
Speaker 3: listen to full episodes with stories just like this. Just

1514
01:08:32,640 --> 01:08:35,519
Speaker 3: go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast app

1515
01:08:35,520 --> 01:08:36,559
Speaker 3: and search a book is storytime.

1516
01:08:36,640 --> 01:08:38,040
Speaker 4: This is one of the craziest stories.

1517
01:08:38,200 --> 01:08:41,160
Speaker 3: Insane, insane word No, the worst part, it's not even

1518
01:08:41,240 --> 01:08:43,920
Speaker 3: like that, she's insane. And like a full on Disney adult.

1519
01:08:44,080 --> 01:08:46,280
Speaker 3: It's that he didn't catch on to any of it.

1520
01:08:46,360 --> 01:08:50,200
Speaker 4: I mean both, both, both, No, both, it's.

1521
01:08:50,000 --> 01:08:52,320
Speaker 3: Both, but it's it's coupled with that he's stupid.

1522
01:08:52,400 --> 01:08:53,439
Speaker 4: I think this is one of the one of the

1523
01:08:53,439 --> 01:08:56,120
Speaker 4: stories where I get the most aggravated, because the Internet

1524
01:08:56,320 --> 01:08:58,400
Speaker 4: is never wrong, and you still and.

1525
01:08:58,400 --> 01:09:00,640
Speaker 3: You're ignoring it, and you're ignoring it three times in

1526
01:09:00,680 --> 01:09:02,920
Speaker 3: her After this, Jess went to her room and started

1527
01:09:02,960 --> 01:09:06,519
Speaker 3: listening to Disney music with the volume at max, singing along.

1528
01:09:06,560 --> 01:09:07,720
Speaker 4: I guarantee you is let it Go.

1529
01:09:08,080 --> 01:09:10,479
Speaker 3: I listened to rendition of let It Go. Oh my God,

1530
01:09:10,720 --> 01:09:14,799
Speaker 3: oh yo yo correct more times than I can count.

1531
01:09:14,960 --> 01:09:17,439
Speaker 3: Maybe it refers to me here. The next morning, she

1532
01:09:17,479 --> 01:09:19,200
Speaker 3: told me that she was moving to Orlando with her

1533
01:09:19,240 --> 01:09:20,840
Speaker 3: without me, and said that if I want to be

1534
01:09:20,880 --> 01:09:23,599
Speaker 3: a piece of crap husband, I can just stay where

1535
01:09:23,600 --> 01:09:25,400
Speaker 3: I am. I'm going to just be a piece of

1536
01:09:25,439 --> 01:09:28,599
Speaker 3: crap husband. I've tried. I've tried to deny the obvious

1537
01:09:28,640 --> 01:09:31,040
Speaker 3: because it would make just happy, but I can't anymore.

1538
01:09:31,200 --> 01:09:33,559
Speaker 3: I just want to be alone. I wasn't responding to

1539
01:09:33,600 --> 01:09:35,800
Speaker 3: your comments, but they've helped me more than you can know.

1540
01:09:36,080 --> 01:09:39,360
Speaker 3: Thank you to everyone who posted and commentar One says

1541
01:09:39,560 --> 01:09:42,360
Speaker 3: Jess has truly reached the ultimate level of Disney obsession,

1542
01:09:42,479 --> 01:09:45,160
Speaker 3: moving just to be closer to Disney World. We stand

1543
01:09:45,240 --> 01:09:48,720
Speaker 3: a committed fan. Opie says, yeah, I'm nothing idiot for

1544
01:09:48,800 --> 01:09:51,160
Speaker 3: going along with it this long. I just wanted her

1545
01:09:51,160 --> 01:09:54,240
Speaker 3: to be happy. Commenter says, let her go, Let her go.

1546
01:09:54,880 --> 01:09:57,599
Speaker 3: Opie says, dude, please, and she kept delivering that the

1547
01:09:57,600 --> 01:10:01,439
Speaker 3: code never bothered me anyway. Such a caddyway. Like, Bro,

1548
01:10:01,560 --> 01:10:04,760
Speaker 3: you're moving to Florida. It's the end of January and

1549
01:10:04,800 --> 01:10:07,640
Speaker 3: it's seventy one having degrees there, and that's the end

1550
01:10:07,680 --> 01:10:08,200
Speaker 3: of that story.