WEBVTT - Bert Kreischer (pt. 2) 0:00:01.840 --> 0:00:04.320 Oh we're rolling back. Okay, So here's the deal. It 0:00:04.400 --> 0:00:07.520 is Monday right now, to me, to you, it's Thursday. 0:00:07.560 --> 0:00:10.280 The reason why is your boy steps in here Monday 0:00:10.280 --> 0:00:12.959 at one point thirty. The boys in the back setup, 0:00:13.000 --> 0:00:15.520 they do all the technical stuff, do little Rayman type shit, 0:00:15.600 --> 0:00:19.000 little napster type shit, Italian job type shit. I come in, 0:00:19.200 --> 0:00:22.720 I say, hey, welcome to Busting with the Boys, the 0:00:22.760 --> 0:00:26.680 greatest podcast of all time, presented by the beautiful, durable, 0:00:26.880 --> 0:00:29.920 reliable Chevy Silverado. And as soon as Jack can get 0:00:29.920 --> 0:00:31.639 the ad read up for me, I'm gonna hit that 0:00:31.720 --> 0:00:33.880 thing for you. Guys, don't mention the model year. Don't 0:00:33.880 --> 0:00:36.320 know why I read that. The most serable, reliable vehicle 0:00:36.400 --> 0:00:38.680 on the road. Silverado is as strong and dependable as 0:00:38.680 --> 0:00:41.720 the people who drive them. Chevy Silverado, modern and advance, 0:00:41.760 --> 0:00:43.960 with a ton of a partner and getting things done, 0:00:44.159 --> 0:00:45.680 especially when it comes to the heart and soul of 0:00:45.720 --> 0:00:50.440 the pickup truck the bed. With Silverado, you get the 0:00:50.440 --> 0:00:53.680 most functional bed of any competitor, best in class, standard 0:00:53.720 --> 0:00:57.240 cargo volume. The inner gate folds up to a large 0:00:57.240 --> 0:00:59.080 step for easily getting in and out of the bed. 0:00:59.240 --> 0:01:01.000 That's a big deal for those of you have little 0:01:01.280 --> 0:01:05.080 orthopedic issues available industry. First, power up and down tailgate 0:01:05.120 --> 0:01:07.280 that's up, that's down, dude. Those are the two moves, 0:01:07.400 --> 0:01:09.520 and they do them both with the touch of a button. 0:01:09.640 --> 0:01:13.080 That's unbelievable. Or the available multi flex teal here we've 0:01:13.080 --> 0:01:16.679 been telling you about, with six convenient configurations. All this 0:01:16.840 --> 0:01:21.000 makes the bed of the Silverado work harder and smarter. Silverado, 0:01:21.240 --> 0:01:26.440 It's strong, it's advanced, it's dependable. Listen, I hope you 0:01:26.440 --> 0:01:29.039 guys enjoyed Tuesday, and I know I hope that. God 0:01:29.200 --> 0:01:32.080 when Tuesday hit, you guys thought, damn, I can't wait 0:01:32.120 --> 0:01:34.360 for forty eight hours when this thing drops again. And 0:01:34.440 --> 0:01:36.360 I hope you guys all came back, and I hope 0:01:36.360 --> 0:01:39.560 you called. A couple friends said, hey, buddy, looks like penises, 0:01:39.560 --> 0:01:42.040 but it's also just the phones. Hey buddy, I need 0:01:42.080 --> 0:01:43.160 you to look at bust on to the boys and 0:01:43.160 --> 0:01:45.760 you subscribe and he's unscribing as your resubscribe. Why Because 0:01:45.800 --> 0:01:47.880 I'm a Tier one motherfucker, and that's how we do 0:01:47.920 --> 0:01:51.080 shit around here, all right, King Kong ain't got shit 0:01:51.160 --> 0:01:53.240 on me type shit. You know what I'm saying. Den's 0:01:53.280 --> 0:01:56.360 on Washington let's jump right into the episode. I don't 0:01:56.360 --> 0:01:58.400 want to do this bullshit. Hey, we're back and forth. 0:01:58.400 --> 0:02:01.560 We're having a great time. The boys you, I love you, 0:02:01.680 --> 0:02:03.880 WE love you. Will is not here because it's still Monday. 0:02:03.880 --> 0:02:06.080 When we did the first intro for the Tuesday, but 0:02:06.080 --> 0:02:08.399 now it's Thursday, there's no more intro anymore. We'll still 0:02:08.440 --> 0:02:11.320 gone because he's sick. He's in bed, he's got the 0:02:11.320 --> 0:02:14.280 thermometer under his tongue. Same bit as last time. Jump 0:02:14.320 --> 0:02:17.920 in Burt Kreischer Part two. Please God enjoy it. I 0:02:18.000 --> 0:02:20.680 know you will. Ladist, gentlemen, we break up the second 0:02:20.720 --> 0:02:22.840 part of the greatest podcast of all time, Busting with 0:02:22.880 --> 0:02:24.919 the Boys with Burt Kreischer, to let you know two 0:02:24.919 --> 0:02:28.000 things one same old song and dance. Ladies, gentlemen, as 0:02:28.040 --> 0:02:30.840 you just subscribe, unsubscribe or resubscribe to Busting with the Boys. 0:02:31.080 --> 0:02:32.720 If you do that, the boys get paid. When the 0:02:32.720 --> 0:02:34.760 boys get paid, we do more stuff. We do more stuff. 0:02:34.760 --> 0:02:36.920 That's more content for you, guys to absorb. It's people 0:02:36.919 --> 0:02:38.880 helping people. That's powerful stuff. That's stuff we can do. 0:02:39.160 --> 0:02:43.080 Another thing that's gonna help you in life and making 0:02:43.120 --> 0:02:45.360 yourself feel a little bit better from your shoulders, to 0:02:45.400 --> 0:02:46.959 your toes and in your ears. A little bit on 0:02:47.040 --> 0:02:49.560 the back of the ears is Duke Canon. You follow 0:02:49.560 --> 0:02:51.520 their social you go to it. You're like, this is 0:02:51.560 --> 0:02:54.120 not a This is not a soap place. This is 0:02:54.160 --> 0:02:55.920 not a place where I get my shampoo. This is 0:02:55.960 --> 0:02:59.760 a meme website, is what this is? Their shit is hilarious? 0:02:59.800 --> 0:03:02.480 Do you And not only is their product also hilarious. 0:03:02.520 --> 0:03:04.760 It smells great. It makes you feel warman fuzzy inside. 0:03:04.840 --> 0:03:07.959 And when you finished, dud, you're like, oh man, I'm 0:03:08.240 --> 0:03:10.840 kind of ready for my day, or hey, oh man, 0:03:10.960 --> 0:03:13.280 I'm kind of ready to end my day. However you 0:03:13.280 --> 0:03:14.560 want to do it. When you get a little shower 0:03:14.600 --> 0:03:17.079 in their big icepick of soap, dude, you look at it, 0:03:17.080 --> 0:03:18.639 it says like bush on it and a bunch of 0:03:18.680 --> 0:03:20.880 other stuff. You're like, this can't smell good. Pop the top, 0:03:20.919 --> 0:03:25.000 give a sniff, guess what happens, and doorphins. I'm feeling great. 0:03:25.720 --> 0:03:28.160 It's not that kind of soap. But you feel pretty 0:03:28.200 --> 0:03:30.760 good when you smell you know what I'm saying. That 0:03:30.960 --> 0:03:33.040 hair selling stuff, dude, I have, But because I always 0:03:33.040 --> 0:03:34.280 do a work here before I come here, so I 0:03:34.280 --> 0:03:37.040 look like a homeless person. They got beard care, which 0:03:37.080 --> 0:03:38.520 I try my best to use. But you know your 0:03:38.520 --> 0:03:40.240 boy doesn't really have a beard. So here we are. 0:03:40.840 --> 0:03:42.720 You shave your boy doesn't shave because if I shave, 0:03:42.760 --> 0:03:44.360 then I have no jaw line and I get insecure 0:03:44.360 --> 0:03:46.840 about my body. And then you got facial skincare for 0:03:46.840 --> 0:03:48.280 those of you want to make them poorest. Kind of 0:03:48.280 --> 0:03:50.440 go away a little bit, dude, it's amazing. Show me 0:03:50.440 --> 0:03:52.240 done that called action. Quick give a little scroll o 0:03:52.320 --> 0:03:55.240 quick check out Duke Cannon at any target or on 0:03:55.360 --> 0:03:57.680 Duke Cannon dot com and use code busting for fifty 0:03:57.680 --> 0:04:01.680 percent off your first order. Duke Cannon. It's not for clowns. 0:04:01.960 --> 0:04:02.240 Uh? 0:04:02.280 --> 0:04:05.720 Are we rolling back? Uh? I? Did you get my question? 0:04:05.960 --> 0:04:06.120 Or no? 0:04:07.840 --> 0:04:08.000 Hey? 0:04:08.040 --> 0:04:09.960 A lot of adversity on the bus so far, boys, 0:04:10.000 --> 0:04:13.560 a lot of it. What's that little pivot? Little pivot? 0:04:13.560 --> 0:04:15.440 Boss looked at I said, we lost thirty minutes, but 0:04:15.480 --> 0:04:16.600 we actually didn't lose any minutes. 0:04:16.720 --> 0:04:17.200 Little panic. 0:04:17.240 --> 0:04:19.039 It's like when you're pregnant and then she goes, I 0:04:19.080 --> 0:04:20.680 haven't felt it kick in a while, and you're like 0:04:20.720 --> 0:04:22.520 what yeah, And then that's why I couldn't have a 0:04:22.520 --> 0:04:24.920 baby inside me, because I would be so nervous that 0:04:24.960 --> 0:04:26.400 it's stopped kicking, and then she goes out there it 0:04:26.440 --> 0:04:27.719 goes and you're like, like when you're. 0:04:27.680 --> 0:04:29.440 To bring it up when you're in high school and 0:04:29.480 --> 0:04:30.680 your girls like, oh, I'm late. 0:04:31.600 --> 0:04:33.560 Oh I've never had that. Oh for real, I never 0:04:33.600 --> 0:04:36.160 had about wearing condoms, Like I didn't wear. 0:04:36.400 --> 0:04:38.880 No, I don't wear a yeah, I work condom. One time, 0:04:39.240 --> 0:04:40.280 girl was on birth control. 0:04:40.360 --> 0:04:43.599 Like it's like, oh yeah, yan, those were fucking those 0:04:43.600 --> 0:04:45.040 were corns in college. 0:04:45.080 --> 0:04:49.960 But I didn't. We're talking high school cameras see meat. 0:04:50.000 --> 0:04:52.520 For me, I wore a condom the first time, like 0:04:52.560 --> 0:04:54.640 the second time, and like the third time and then 0:04:54.720 --> 0:04:56.679 but by the fourth time it was the same girl 0:04:57.080 --> 0:04:59.560 and she was like, go ahead, rip it off, and 0:05:00.080 --> 0:05:02.520 me it was like, this is actual sex, Like there 0:05:02.600 --> 0:05:05.400 is the greatest thing. One of him is Like the 0:05:05.400 --> 0:05:07.600 economy is just a wasteland. 0:05:07.600 --> 0:05:08.400 That's fuck it. 0:05:08.440 --> 0:05:10.440 I'll never rather not have sex. Yeah. If I shen't 0:05:10.440 --> 0:05:13.200 my wife, I'm definitely not wearing a condom. She should 0:05:13.320 --> 0:05:14.960 know that. He yeh yeah yeah. 0:05:15.120 --> 0:05:16.360 But we were on the bus, we were talking about 0:05:16.360 --> 0:05:18.720 close calls. We were in Tallahassee, and I was I was, 0:05:18.839 --> 0:05:20.120 I looked at a place where a girl. 0:05:19.960 --> 0:05:21.239 Told me she thought she was pregnant. 0:05:21.320 --> 0:05:22.520 I looked at it and I was like, yeah, man, 0:05:22.560 --> 0:05:24.880 that was a close call in our camp and we're like, 0:05:25.160 --> 0:05:27.680 anyone ever had a close call? And our cameraman, John 0:05:27.720 --> 0:05:30.120 Mann's goes, I had a close call once. We're like really, 0:05:30.120 --> 0:05:32.080 He's like, yeah, luckily she took care of it. And 0:05:32.120 --> 0:05:34.600 we're like, oh, that's not a close call. That's an importion. 0:05:35.760 --> 0:05:38.520 Hopefully sh d oh. 0:05:38.680 --> 0:05:39.160 Comedy. 0:05:39.760 --> 0:05:41.640 Yeah, yeah, when did you start doing comedy? 0:05:41.720 --> 0:05:42.799 First time I did comedy? 0:05:43.000 --> 0:05:45.600 I was It was nineteen ninety seven in Tallahassee at 0:05:45.600 --> 0:05:49.839 pop Elli's. Now, I played baseball with the guy. You 0:05:49.880 --> 0:05:51.640 know what, I don't even think it's just I guess 0:05:51.680 --> 0:05:53.080 it is. I guess there is this part of the 0:05:53.160 --> 0:05:55.920 chain now. But uh, I played baseball guy named Brad 0:05:56.000 --> 0:05:59.560 Radkey my whole life. He ended up playing for the Twins. Uh. 0:05:59.760 --> 0:06:03.400 What amazing baseball player, amazing pitcher my whole life. 0:06:03.440 --> 0:06:03.960 Growing up. 0:06:04.400 --> 0:06:05.880 I would get in the car with my dad and go, 0:06:05.920 --> 0:06:10.919 how come everyone says he'll definitely go pro? But no 0:06:10.920 --> 0:06:13.440 one says that about me, and my Dad's like, buddy, 0:06:13.600 --> 0:06:16.640 he just does it differently. Like, there's something effortless when 0:06:16.640 --> 0:06:19.320 Brad plays that you don't question if it's going to 0:06:19.360 --> 0:06:21.680 be great. You just wonder how great it's gonna get. 0:06:22.040 --> 0:06:25.120 And he was like, Brad could. Brad would come out 0:06:25.160 --> 0:06:28.039 to baseball practice. He played basketball also, he'd come out 0:06:28.080 --> 0:06:31.159 in high tops and his basketball offit to just take VP. 0:06:31.920 --> 0:06:33.880 And he was a pitcher and he's hit. 0:06:33.920 --> 0:06:38.280 Twelve home runs, just hit twelve home runs effortlessly, and 0:06:38.320 --> 0:06:40.760 when he pitched, there was so much movement on his 0:06:40.839 --> 0:06:43.120 ball that he didn't even know why. 0:06:43.279 --> 0:06:45.839 It's just it's the way he was built different. 0:06:46.200 --> 0:06:48.800 And my dad goes, Buddy, the goal in your life 0:06:48.839 --> 0:06:52.280 should be to find the thing that's Brad Radkeys baseball. 0:06:52.320 --> 0:06:55.000 Like find the thing that you love that it's effortless 0:06:55.040 --> 0:06:57.120 and that you that you go, oh, I think I'm 0:06:57.160 --> 0:06:58.800 pretty good at this. And when I first did stand up, 0:06:58.839 --> 0:06:59.920 I called my dad and when I got back to 0:07:00.040 --> 0:07:02.680 my apartment and I said, I think I found my 0:07:02.680 --> 0:07:03.960 my Brad Radkey baseball. 0:07:04.000 --> 0:07:05.120 He actually said that same term. 0:07:05.160 --> 0:07:05.920 Well, it was it was. 0:07:05.960 --> 0:07:08.040 It was just something that we talked about because that 0:07:08.080 --> 0:07:10.160 it bothered me that because I thought I'd go pro 0:07:10.240 --> 0:07:13.120 and baseball. I mean, I got recruited to play by 0:07:13.320 --> 0:07:15.640 Duke in the Citadel, but I thought I would. I 0:07:15.720 --> 0:07:18.920 thought I'd end up playing professional baseball. And it just 0:07:19.080 --> 0:07:22.480 didn't like it. It didn't manifest. I didn't have whatever 0:07:22.480 --> 0:07:26.960 the long strand DNA is that fucking makes gives you explosivity, 0:07:27.360 --> 0:07:29.480 didn't have it. But when I did stand up, I 0:07:29.480 --> 0:07:31.440 went on stage for the first time in pop Elli's, 0:07:31.480 --> 0:07:33.440 I did four comics when ahead to me that you 0:07:33.440 --> 0:07:36.280 said twenty minutes, and I did thirty minutes, and it 0:07:36.320 --> 0:07:38.600 didn't I didn't even try. I mean, it just like 0:07:38.720 --> 0:07:41.400 came out. And I could think very quickly. The second 0:07:41.400 --> 0:07:43.960 I got on stage, I could think quicker than everyone else, 0:07:44.000 --> 0:07:46.360 and I could talk very quickly, and I could I 0:07:46.360 --> 0:07:48.400 could manage the story in my head, and I could 0:07:48.440 --> 0:07:51.040 write on stage, and it was amazing. 0:07:51.080 --> 0:07:53.480 And then the next time I went on stage it 0:07:53.520 --> 0:07:55.240 was even better. And it was in New. 0:07:55.200 --> 0:07:58.600 York and I destroyed, I mean me and Dimitri Martin 0:07:58.600 --> 0:08:01.280 with the two people that night that killed on stage. 0:08:01.840 --> 0:08:03.160 And then I was like, yeah, this is my thing. 0:08:03.240 --> 0:08:07.000 I mean, I really loved it. I mean it connected 0:08:07.000 --> 0:08:09.640 with everything about me. The things that people got bothered 0:08:09.720 --> 0:08:13.040 with me about that were like Jesus Christ for dinner. 0:08:13.160 --> 0:08:15.520 I won't shut up. He keeps selling stories. Well, you 0:08:15.560 --> 0:08:17.560 do get on stage and it's like, oh, tell more stories, 0:08:17.600 --> 0:08:20.320 and I was like, oh, I'm not annoying anymore. Oh 0:08:20.440 --> 0:08:24.280 and so and and you know you could, you could, 0:08:24.280 --> 0:08:26.160 you could punch up a story and you didn't have 0:08:26.200 --> 0:08:28.960 that dick at the lunch table going. That didn't happen 0:08:29.560 --> 0:08:31.840 like a fuck off. I'm just trying to make you laugh, asshole, 0:08:32.240 --> 0:08:34.520 you know. And so it was just connected with everything 0:08:34.559 --> 0:08:37.360 I loved and I really loved. I really figured out 0:08:37.400 --> 0:08:40.200 who I was those first two times on stage, and 0:08:40.240 --> 0:08:41.760 then New York fucked me up and I tried to 0:08:41.760 --> 0:08:43.840 be a joke writer and I tried to be alty, 0:08:43.920 --> 0:08:44.520 and I tried to. 0:08:44.480 --> 0:08:47.800 Be something else, and then it wasn't really like. 0:08:47.800 --> 0:08:54.520 Uh, like I don't know, ironic or like clever clever 0:08:54.920 --> 0:08:56.959 with your comedy where it's like where you go, oh yeah, 0:08:57.000 --> 0:09:00.600 that math does work out, you know, like it's explain this. 0:09:00.679 --> 0:09:02.640 It was big then, it's not very big right now. 0:09:03.120 --> 0:09:06.920 But it's like Jenny Garofo is an alt comic the 0:09:07.000 --> 0:09:09.839 State Patton Oswald technically, although. 0:09:09.600 --> 0:09:12.199 I think he's never he's fucking hilarious. 0:09:13.160 --> 0:09:15.880 But and then, and then when I started doing podcasts, 0:09:15.880 --> 0:09:18.079 I started really finding my voice of a comic where 0:09:18.120 --> 0:09:20.680 I was like, oh yeah, storytelling. I like storytelling. It's 0:09:20.679 --> 0:09:22.040 like when I when you tell the story about the 0:09:22.080 --> 0:09:27.280 roll NECKX and for me, I I love a good story. 0:09:27.400 --> 0:09:29.880 I love it. I love the show. 0:09:30.120 --> 0:09:32.760 It's a great story. It's a great story. 0:09:33.480 --> 0:09:38.959 Here's how can I tell you what you know? 0:09:39.080 --> 0:09:40.480 Here's can I so I. 0:09:42.160 --> 0:09:42.840 What you want to know? 0:09:42.920 --> 0:09:44.480 So I at one point I wanted to do a 0:09:44.480 --> 0:09:46.720 podcast called let Me tell you Your Story because people 0:09:46.720 --> 0:09:49.240 can tell stories that sucks stories. They have good stories, 0:09:49.640 --> 0:09:51.840 but I can always see the punch up in the story. 0:09:52.240 --> 0:09:54.960 So like the punch up in your story. The thing 0:09:55.000 --> 0:09:59.400 that makes your story amazing is you start this story. 0:09:59.520 --> 0:10:02.320 Is you need to start your story with I'm usually 0:10:02.320 --> 0:10:03.719 want to be the life of the party, but when 0:10:03.760 --> 0:10:05.559 it comes to weddings, I like to take a back seat. 0:10:05.920 --> 0:10:08.400 I love to take a back seat. I just like 0:10:08.480 --> 0:10:10.320 to sit back because I know it's not my day. 0:10:10.720 --> 0:10:13.079 But he's my best friend, so I want to get 0:10:13.120 --> 0:10:13.880 him something special. 0:10:13.960 --> 0:10:15.320 I get him. Then then you want to the roll 0:10:15.400 --> 0:10:15.720 X story. 0:10:15.800 --> 0:10:18.360 Right then you go into this, but then your story 0:10:18.440 --> 0:10:21.000 ends with you in the river and you go so 0:10:21.080 --> 0:10:23.679 like you start trying to be noble. This is the 0:10:23.800 --> 0:10:27.440 journey of every everyone in the Bible. You try to 0:10:27.440 --> 0:10:30.480 be noble, you try to be great, Temptation comes your way. 0:10:30.640 --> 0:10:31.840 It's not your fault. 0:10:32.120 --> 0:10:34.880 God damn it. I was just being a friend. You're 0:10:34.920 --> 0:10:37.680 on the hook. I'm taking bullets everywhere. I got to 0:10:37.840 --> 0:10:38.400 watches on. 0:10:38.679 --> 0:10:39.320 I look over. 0:10:39.720 --> 0:10:42.640 He's in the fucking river like a beaver passed out. 0:10:42.880 --> 0:10:45.520 Picture comes up, boom, thank you, good night. 0:10:45.640 --> 0:10:47.000 That's all life show story. 0:10:47.360 --> 0:10:51.920 Because hey that picture. Use me up. I'm over there too, 0:10:52.080 --> 0:10:53.320 Watches I look over. 0:10:53.679 --> 0:10:56.640 I told, uh, there's a guy I tell this. 0:10:56.720 --> 0:10:57.360 I tell him. 0:10:57.960 --> 0:11:00.520 He he we've talked about it. I don't know if 0:11:00.520 --> 0:11:03.280 we've talked about it totally. So Brenney Shaw had a great, 0:11:03.520 --> 0:11:06.120 great fucking story. He's a good storyteller. Well, he had 0:11:06.160 --> 0:11:11.319 a great story about fighting uh Kyle uh fighting the 0:11:11.320 --> 0:11:12.439 guy for the championship. 0:11:13.240 --> 0:11:13.400 Right. 0:11:13.600 --> 0:11:18.800 If you know that name, it's the big Waian Travis 0:11:19.080 --> 0:11:19.720 Travis Brown. 0:11:21.559 --> 0:11:23.400 So he goes, hey, man, I'm doing this story, Alrea. 0:11:23.400 --> 0:11:23.840 He hit me up. 0:11:23.880 --> 0:11:26.319 He's like, he's telling the story on storytelling show. Can 0:11:26.320 --> 0:11:28.040 you help him tell his story, and I was like, yeah, 0:11:28.080 --> 0:11:30.600 it's easy tof It's easy, very easy when you hear 0:11:30.640 --> 0:11:34.439 someone's story to find the peaks, the arcs, the where 0:11:34.480 --> 0:11:36.800 it needs to land. So he came to my house 0:11:36.840 --> 0:11:38.480 and he told me the story. It was an hour long. 0:11:38.520 --> 0:11:41.320 I've recorded all but I recorded all of it. And 0:11:41.360 --> 0:11:44.840 then I said, it's a great fucking story when fighting 0:11:44.840 --> 0:11:46.200 for the championship in the UFC. 0:11:46.600 --> 0:11:49.800 How does this not a great story? It's just long? 0:11:50.240 --> 0:11:53.920 And what he found important in the story were things 0:11:53.920 --> 0:11:56.120 that I didn't find important. He wanted to tell you 0:11:56.200 --> 0:11:57.800 how hard he was training for the fight, which I 0:11:57.800 --> 0:12:00.880 don't give a fuck, and I'm sure you are. He 0:12:00.920 --> 0:12:04.040 wanted to tell you the things that he didn't find 0:12:04.080 --> 0:12:09.520 important I found really important, like the walk out, like 0:12:09.559 --> 0:12:11.959 the walk in versus the walk out, Like I found 0:12:12.000 --> 0:12:15.679 that fucking fascinating, of like you're the greatest and then 0:12:15.679 --> 0:12:17.840 you're walking out you're a fucking bum, you know, Like 0:12:17.920 --> 0:12:19.080 I found that fascinating. 0:12:19.520 --> 0:12:20.280 So I say we. 0:12:20.240 --> 0:12:22.520 Get done, and I go, okay, can I. 0:12:21.960 --> 0:12:23.880 Can I just tell you your story? And he was 0:12:23.920 --> 0:12:24.719 like yeah. 0:12:24.800 --> 0:12:26.160 So I told him his story back to him in 0:12:26.160 --> 0:12:28.400 ten minutes, and the look on his face was like 0:12:29.040 --> 0:12:31.760 and then what happened? And it was like so much fun? 0:12:32.000 --> 0:12:34.400 But you can do that. My cameraman, John Mann's has 0:12:34.480 --> 0:12:37.040 the greatest stories ever, the guy about the post call, 0:12:37.360 --> 0:12:38.920 but he can't tell his story to save his life. 0:12:39.000 --> 0:12:42.120 One time he was shooting for National Geographic and they're 0:12:42.120 --> 0:12:43.360 shooting the ten most deadly snakes. 0:12:43.360 --> 0:12:44.439 So they take him out in the middle of the 0:12:44.440 --> 0:12:46.040 desert to film them. 0:12:46.120 --> 0:12:48.000 Right, they want to film them in their national habitat, 0:12:48.280 --> 0:12:49.600 and so the first one they're gonna do is a 0:12:49.600 --> 0:12:51.840 spitting co but they have nine other snakes. They're gonna 0:12:51.880 --> 0:12:54.200 have spitting cobra first. So they're like, we go to 0:12:54.240 --> 0:12:55.800 the camera set up. They're the middle of the desert. 0:12:55.800 --> 0:12:58.079 The jeep's over there, all right, is everyone ready? And 0:12:58.080 --> 0:13:00.360 they're like yep. They're like all right, everyone's got protection, 0:13:00.480 --> 0:13:02.640 everyone's ready, and they're like yeah. So they let it 0:13:02.679 --> 0:13:04.920 go and it fucking takes off and it climbs up 0:13:04.920 --> 0:13:08.320 in the rigging of the jeep and they're like okay. 0:13:09.120 --> 0:13:12.040 They're like, well, does anyone want to look up and 0:13:12.080 --> 0:13:13.520 see if they can see the snake? And they're like 0:13:13.600 --> 0:13:16.080 it's a spitting cobra. No, and they're like, what do 0:13:16.120 --> 0:13:17.559 we do? And they're like, let's just wait it out. 0:13:18.120 --> 0:13:20.079 So they're like okay, So they just sit around the 0:13:20.120 --> 0:13:22.120 jeep waiting for a cobra to leave, and it doesn't. 0:13:22.520 --> 0:13:24.520 It doesn't, and the sun starts setting and they're like, 0:13:25.640 --> 0:13:28.240 all right, everyone in the jeep, we gotta leave. So 0:13:28.280 --> 0:13:30.280 everyone gets in a jeep with a spitting cobra and 0:13:30.360 --> 0:13:34.280 the letter rigging and they drive four hours, bouncing around 0:13:34.320 --> 0:13:37.400 the desert, just any movement. 0:13:37.400 --> 0:13:38.520 They're like, motherfucker. 0:13:38.760 --> 0:13:39.000 Yeah. 0:13:39.040 --> 0:13:39.839 They get to. 0:13:39.840 --> 0:13:42.840 Their camp where it's all open air tents and they 0:13:42.840 --> 0:13:44.520 park the jeep and they're like, everyone go to bed 0:13:44.520 --> 0:13:45.439 and they're like, is. 0:13:45.400 --> 0:13:48.000 It cobra still in the fucking jeep And they're. 0:13:47.880 --> 0:13:48.480 Like no, no. 0:13:49.360 --> 0:13:49.760 He goes. 0:13:49.800 --> 0:13:52.240 I had the worst night sleep of my life. But 0:13:52.400 --> 0:13:55.480 he tells this story and it's so boring. It's so 0:13:55.640 --> 0:13:57.079 boring because he tells you the stuff. 0:13:57.080 --> 0:13:57.600 You don't care. 0:13:57.760 --> 0:14:00.959 We're shooting on the camera. The cana next fells, these cameras, know, 0:14:01.040 --> 0:14:03.880 these cameras, and you're like, get the fucking camera out 0:14:03.880 --> 0:14:07.880 of the story. My wife, My wife can't tell a 0:14:07.920 --> 0:14:10.079 story to save her fucking life. Really, it's like you 0:14:10.120 --> 0:14:12.120 were three pages out of Moby Dick and just starts 0:14:12.160 --> 0:14:13.440 there there was a whale. 0:14:13.520 --> 0:14:15.000 You're like, wait, what the fuck are you talking about? 0:14:15.559 --> 0:14:15.760 Yeah? 0:14:16.840 --> 0:14:19.240 How did you become so well versed telling stories? 0:14:19.760 --> 0:14:22.080 I think I think going to an all boys cap 0:14:22.200 --> 0:14:25.880 high school started it, and then I think a lot 0:14:25.880 --> 0:14:28.280 of a lot of telling the machine and figuring out 0:14:28.640 --> 0:14:31.480 how to tell the machine, and then within telling the machine, 0:14:31.600 --> 0:14:35.560 getting ready for especially I started realizing the number one 0:14:35.560 --> 0:14:36.400 thing a story needs. 0:14:36.320 --> 0:14:37.760 Is an end, like it's got it. 0:14:37.880 --> 0:14:40.240 People have to know it's over and and and if 0:14:40.280 --> 0:14:42.360 you don't have an end to a story, it doesn't 0:14:42.520 --> 0:14:45.880 it doesn't work. And that was with the machine. The 0:14:46.040 --> 0:14:52.040 end was initially so I understand, you're in the machine. 0:14:52.040 --> 0:14:53.600 Tonight you party with us. That's what I thought the 0:14:53.680 --> 0:14:56.240 end was. But it wasn't because the audience tells you 0:14:56.240 --> 0:14:58.560 what the end is. They'll tell you by applause. So 0:14:58.640 --> 0:15:00.640 I goes to tonight You're party with us, and everyone 0:15:00.760 --> 0:15:03.440 was still on the thing. They're like, did you party 0:15:03.520 --> 0:15:05.680 with him? And then I'd keep talking, oh yeah, I 0:15:06.120 --> 0:15:08.160 ended up going to strip club. And then they're like 0:15:08.200 --> 0:15:10.440 and then what happened? And You're like, well, I'm done. 0:15:11.000 --> 0:15:14.120 And then it wasn't until it wasn't until one night 0:15:14.320 --> 0:15:17.080 I randomly had this chunk where this teacher comes in, 0:15:17.120 --> 0:15:19.040 sticks her head and goes, this is over, you're done, 0:15:19.160 --> 0:15:22.280 You're coming with us, and I focused on the wrong thing. 0:15:22.320 --> 0:15:24.560 I focused on the fact that she was Puerto Rican 0:15:24.640 --> 0:15:26.720 and this guy was Russian. That was what I was 0:15:26.720 --> 0:15:28.560 fascinating to me. So he spits fog in her eyes, 0:15:28.760 --> 0:15:31.000 shuts the doorner face, and then we robbed the train. 0:15:31.960 --> 0:15:33.920 But in one night, I was drunk. It's always good 0:15:33.920 --> 0:15:35.760 to get drunk or high on stage every now and then. 0:15:36.360 --> 0:15:40.360 And he shuts the door in her face and he goes, 0:15:42.000 --> 0:15:43.440 he goes, no one talks to the machine like that, 0:15:43.560 --> 0:15:45.320 shuts the doorner face. Then he turns around to me 0:15:45.600 --> 0:15:47.840 and at randomly I said, and he goes, fuck that bitch, 0:15:47.920 --> 0:15:50.040 this is Russia. As soon as I said that, I went, 0:15:50.160 --> 0:15:51.840 that's the end of the story. That's the end of 0:15:51.880 --> 0:15:53.520 the story. The cop says it too. If the cop 0:15:53.560 --> 0:15:55.240 says it too, that's the end of the story. And 0:15:55.240 --> 0:15:57.440 then they know it's over. So then I that night, 0:15:58.080 --> 0:16:00.680 I was so excited. It's the greatest in the world. 0:16:00.800 --> 0:16:02.800 It's got to be what it feels like to pick 0:16:02.880 --> 0:16:05.120 up a fumble and see nothing but open field, to 0:16:05.240 --> 0:16:06.880 know that you have an end to a story and 0:16:06.920 --> 0:16:09.160 you have the story and I get to the end. 0:16:09.640 --> 0:16:11.920 He says, uh, so I'm understanding the machine. Tonight you 0:16:11.960 --> 0:16:14.280 parted with us, and now I'm feeling it. And I'm like, 0:16:14.680 --> 0:16:16.280 I'm like, wait, I'm not in trouble, and he's like, 0:16:16.360 --> 0:16:18.120 of course not. Do you like strip clubs? I was like, fuck, 0:16:18.200 --> 0:16:22.000 I like strip clubs. I go, wait, I'm not in trouble, 0:16:22.040 --> 0:16:23.920 and he leans into me real close, so close, and 0:16:23.960 --> 0:16:26.160 I love small details. I do remember I could smell 0:16:26.160 --> 0:16:28.280 his morning cigarette and he goes so close I could 0:16:28.280 --> 0:16:31.280 smell his morning cigarette. He goes, no, fuck that beach, 0:16:31.360 --> 0:16:33.760 this is Rasha, and the place goes fucking nuts, and 0:16:33.800 --> 0:16:35.800 I go, I got my end. I got my fucking end. 0:16:35.960 --> 0:16:38.080 And that is the greatest feeling when you know you 0:16:38.080 --> 0:16:40.160 have an end to a story, when in doubt spread 0:16:40.240 --> 0:16:44.160 him out like that. It's so fun that it's like, 0:16:44.240 --> 0:16:46.520 it's the thing that drives me to write is that 0:16:46.760 --> 0:16:48.040 you get a story, like right now, I have this 0:16:48.440 --> 0:16:50.840 great story about going to an escape room with my family, 0:16:51.080 --> 0:16:51.720 true story. 0:16:53.880 --> 0:16:55.040 But I don't have an end to it because I. 0:16:55.040 --> 0:16:57.040 Don't remember it. I don't really remember it. Yeah, Like 0:16:57.080 --> 0:16:58.720 I didn't. I was never telling it. And then my 0:16:58.800 --> 0:17:01.040 daughter called one night on stage and I answered it. 0:17:01.080 --> 0:17:02.560 She goes, are you telling me the escape room story? 0:17:02.600 --> 0:17:04.600 And I was like, no, should I? She was like, 0:17:04.680 --> 0:17:05.840 it was hilarious. 0:17:06.280 --> 0:17:06.520 Dad. 0:17:06.640 --> 0:17:09.080 Papa threw Nana into a wall and I was like, oh, 0:17:09.119 --> 0:17:11.280 she goes, you remember you farted in the crawl space. 0:17:11.680 --> 0:17:12.919 I was like, no, I don't. 0:17:13.240 --> 0:17:15.560 She goes, Dad, the only reason when we went is 0:17:15.560 --> 0:17:18.400 to watch you and Papa meltdown, and I went for real. 0:17:18.800 --> 0:17:20.000 She was like, Dad, you've got to tell it. 0:17:20.080 --> 0:17:21.800 So I tell it with her on the phone and 0:17:21.840 --> 0:17:23.360 she's punching it up because she was there. 0:17:23.440 --> 0:17:24.280 She remembers it. 0:17:24.720 --> 0:17:26.760 And I'm like, it's on stage, just on stage in 0:17:26.800 --> 0:17:29.800 some fucking theaters, three thousand people. And I'm like, she's 0:17:29.840 --> 0:17:33.479 on the phone, FaceTime, Georgia, I'm telling it. She's punching 0:17:33.480 --> 0:17:34.760 it up, telling me what happened. 0:17:35.040 --> 0:17:35.639 Do you remember, Dad? 0:17:35.680 --> 0:17:37.800 It was fucking The house was painting black because it 0:17:37.880 --> 0:17:40.120 was an escape room, but they're normally a mall's sister 0:17:40.160 --> 0:17:42.200 was in a dude's house and it was paint in black, 0:17:42.320 --> 0:17:44.640 and he was in character He's like have you seen mother? 0:17:44.960 --> 0:17:46.240 My Dad's like fuck this. 0:17:46.720 --> 0:17:48.560 And so I started out, but I don't have an 0:17:48.640 --> 0:17:50.359 end of the story because I really don't remember the story. 0:17:50.600 --> 0:17:52.320 I mean, I know I was there, but I was 0:17:52.320 --> 0:17:54.639 having a panic attack the whole time, and so I 0:17:54.640 --> 0:17:55.880 don't remember much of it. 0:17:56.080 --> 0:17:57.000 Like I remember having a. 0:17:57.000 --> 0:17:57.960 Panic attack the whole time. 0:17:58.040 --> 0:17:59.840 I was having a panic cooct because I don't, like, 0:18:00.080 --> 0:18:03.640 I can't be in confined spaces, like like if you. 0:18:03.560 --> 0:18:07.040 Lock a door on me, I start going like what's 0:18:07.080 --> 0:18:09.760 going on here? You know? And so like I can't. 0:18:09.520 --> 0:18:11.520 Scuba dive because I feel like I have to be 0:18:11.600 --> 0:18:12.679 down there for that period of time. 0:18:12.960 --> 0:18:14.560 I don't know whatever it is. I had a panic attack. 0:18:14.560 --> 0:18:16.359 I thought I was gonna ship my pants the whole time, 0:18:16.720 --> 0:18:18.080 And so I don't have an end to the story yet. 0:18:18.080 --> 0:18:19.080 And once I find that end. 0:18:19.320 --> 0:18:21.760 Once I find that end, then the middle stuff gets 0:18:21.800 --> 0:18:24.720 great because one, because right now you're just kind of 0:18:24.760 --> 0:18:27.320 like like doing this in a story like this worked, 0:18:27.320 --> 0:18:29.440 you know, like you're scrambling, and then once you get 0:18:29.440 --> 0:18:32.280 that end, then you can you can really work out it. 0:18:32.280 --> 0:18:35.840 I had this great story about winning a raffle. It's 0:18:35.880 --> 0:18:39.240 a great story, true story, great story, great story that 0:18:39.280 --> 0:18:41.679 I told on the podcast a couple of times. But 0:18:41.720 --> 0:18:44.199 I didn't have an end to it, like I just 0:18:44.320 --> 0:18:47.840 want all the prizes. It's the story. But yeah, yeah, 0:18:47.920 --> 0:18:50.400 but I just overbought. I put put in six hundred 0:18:50.400 --> 0:18:51.840 and sixty bucks. There were forty bucks in the pot 0:18:51.880 --> 0:18:54.119 I bought. I want all the prizes. Yeah, I didn't 0:18:54.280 --> 0:18:57.679 win one prize and I my wife won it. And 0:18:57.680 --> 0:19:00.080 then that's the end of the story. And it's and 0:19:00.800 --> 0:19:02.479 once I got the end of the story, then I 0:19:02.520 --> 0:19:04.439 was like, oh, I can now, I can let the 0:19:04.480 --> 0:19:06.639 middle part breathe, because I it's if you don't have 0:19:06.680 --> 0:19:08.600 an end, you're panicking throughout the story, going how does 0:19:08.640 --> 0:19:08.919 this end? 0:19:08.920 --> 0:19:09.720 How does this figure it out? 0:19:09.840 --> 0:19:11.360 Once you know you have the end, you can take 0:19:11.359 --> 0:19:12.639 as much time as you want in the middle and 0:19:12.680 --> 0:19:14.760 make it great. The end of your story is you 0:19:14.840 --> 0:19:17.159 in the fucking river. The end of the story is 0:19:17.280 --> 0:19:19.600 you told me a story. We said, I don't I 0:19:19.720 --> 0:19:21.639 like to be the end of the attention. But I 0:19:21.680 --> 0:19:25.000 don't like to do that. At weddings, I remind myself 0:19:25.359 --> 0:19:29.160 there's such a noble mirror and sleep in a river, 0:19:29.560 --> 0:19:32.200 and I go, wait, tell me, tell me how we 0:19:32.240 --> 0:19:34.560 got there, and you didn't. You told me kind of 0:19:35.119 --> 0:19:37.840 It started with I just wanted to do the right thing. 0:19:38.280 --> 0:19:39.920 And then the fucking text you yet. 0:19:39.960 --> 0:19:40.600 I mean, there's so. 0:19:40.680 --> 0:19:42.800 Much meat to that story that if I had that story, 0:19:42.800 --> 0:19:44.520 I'd be like, oh, fucking off to the race. 0:19:44.520 --> 0:19:50.000 You have it. I gotta do five minutes as Zanny's 0:19:50.240 --> 0:19:52.280 day after tomorrow, it's. 0:19:52.119 --> 0:19:53.679 Five minutes you came. No one tell one story in 0:19:53.720 --> 0:19:55.920 five minutes. Do you know what joke? Do you know 0:19:55.920 --> 0:19:56.760 what jokes you want to tell? 0:19:57.640 --> 0:19:58.600 New dad jokes? 0:19:58.800 --> 0:20:00.879 Okay, to run a by me, I'll help you. 0:20:01.000 --> 0:20:02.879 I don't want to do it. I want to hear that. 0:20:03.080 --> 0:20:04.120 No, No, that is why. 0:20:04.240 --> 0:20:05.440 That is why I don't want any of my boy 0:20:05.440 --> 0:20:07.080 We're not going to say, okay, I would talk with 0:20:07.119 --> 0:20:07.800 burd in private. 0:20:08.359 --> 0:20:10.399 That's crazy. What you're gonna have to go and see. 0:20:10.960 --> 0:20:13.000 I'm gonna be there, That's what I told you. I 0:20:13.040 --> 0:20:15.640 know you are. I'm gonna last super hard, no matter 0:20:15.680 --> 0:20:16.639 what I know. But you can't hear. 0:20:17.320 --> 0:20:20.760 Don't give a joke about being defensive, being playing defense 0:20:20.800 --> 0:20:23.320 your whole life, and so your natural instinct me. You 0:20:23.320 --> 0:20:25.159 see something holding it is to try to swat it 0:20:25.200 --> 0:20:26.880 and get it out of their hands. And so that's 0:20:26.880 --> 0:20:28.880 been pretty problematic with your wife carrying the baby around 0:20:28.880 --> 0:20:29.200 the house. 0:20:29.880 --> 0:20:32.920 No, it's a good joke, but. 0:20:32.920 --> 0:20:35.479 If you do the real terminology of whatever, we've been 0:20:35.480 --> 0:20:37.920 doing drills. I've been doing drills to get that fuck. 0:20:38.080 --> 0:20:40.760 You don't swat, you stab. You gotta stab through, stab 0:20:40.880 --> 0:20:43.480 through the way to get through. If you stab, you're 0:20:43.560 --> 0:20:44.879 much more likely to get that ball out. 0:20:45.040 --> 0:20:46.560 You got to get it out of that brown blanket. 0:20:46.600 --> 0:20:47.320 I got, I got? 0:20:47.600 --> 0:20:49.480 What is it? What is it called? When you have PTSD? 0:20:49.560 --> 0:20:51.040 Or I got? You can't came wrap the baby in 0:20:51.080 --> 0:20:51.639 a brown blanket? 0:20:52.320 --> 0:20:52.960 Have a flashback? 0:20:53.119 --> 0:20:53.720 Having a flashback. 0:20:55.160 --> 0:20:55.879 That's a good one. 0:20:55.800 --> 0:20:58.400 Comment because I don't want to talk about that's crazy. 0:20:58.480 --> 0:21:01.200 Dude, you when you or did you writing? So? Is 0:21:01.200 --> 0:21:04.320 that what you do is your whole stand up stories 0:21:04.720 --> 0:21:06.359 and you tell or do you kind of hit some punch? 0:21:06.640 --> 0:21:10.520 I have? So what I do is I write. I 0:21:10.560 --> 0:21:14.200 write very broadly. I write everything. I write everything in 0:21:14.240 --> 0:21:17.800 little jokes, big jokes. I have some tent poles where 0:21:17.800 --> 0:21:20.040 I go escape room. Has been something that that I've 0:21:20.160 --> 0:21:22.919 I've wanted to do but I couldn't do And then 0:21:22.920 --> 0:21:24.720 it wasn't until Georgia brought it up that I thought 0:21:24.760 --> 0:21:27.160 I could do it. But I have some tent poles 0:21:27.520 --> 0:21:30.600 of like bigger stories, and then I have little stuff 0:21:30.640 --> 0:21:33.920 that I write, like I was at a soccer game 0:21:33.920 --> 0:21:36.400 with Tom and I wrote a joke. I was sitting 0:21:36.400 --> 0:21:38.399 and having a beer and I with all these Austin 0:21:38.440 --> 0:21:40.879 friends and I said, uh, I. 0:21:41.200 --> 0:21:43.000 Says soccer is a lot like strip clubs. 0:21:43.280 --> 0:21:45.520 And he's like, how so I go, you can't use 0:21:45.520 --> 0:21:47.280 your hands, No one scores, and it's better when they 0:21:47.320 --> 0:21:49.680 don't speak English. And he was like, it's good joke, 0:21:49.720 --> 0:21:51.680 and I went cool. And then I go, I put 0:21:51.680 --> 0:21:54.520 that somewhere. And so now my goal is to do 0:21:54.560 --> 0:21:58.639 the hour you form the hour. No, you want to 0:21:58.640 --> 0:22:01.000 structure it so you're not repeating your but you want 0:22:01.000 --> 0:22:02.359 to have a lot of little jokes that you can 0:22:02.400 --> 0:22:03.479 sprinkle in, like uh. 0:22:03.880 --> 0:22:05.679 And then sometimes you'll tell a joke you didn't even know, 0:22:05.800 --> 0:22:06.479 like Dad of the Night. 0:22:06.480 --> 0:22:07.840 I almost said I went for a jog, and they 0:22:07.920 --> 0:22:09.919 just started laughing and I went, oh, that's right, you 0:22:09.920 --> 0:22:13.040 don't think I jog, Yeah, of course, yeah. And then 0:22:13.080 --> 0:22:14.600 I was in Baltimore, and I was like, I went 0:22:14.680 --> 0:22:18.200 for a jog here today. It's amazing this city. If 0:22:18.200 --> 0:22:20.120 you're in the wrong neighborhood, a jog really quick turns 0:22:20.119 --> 0:22:22.320 into a run and and and I was like, okay, 0:22:22.320 --> 0:22:24.320 that works. And then I had this one where I 0:22:24.359 --> 0:22:26.240 was like, I got I said true story. I was 0:22:26.320 --> 0:22:27.800 running under an underass in LA and I saw a 0:22:27.800 --> 0:22:29.800 homeless woman scratching off a lottery ticket and I was like, 0:22:29.920 --> 0:22:31.960 what a fucking waste of time. And then I wondered 0:22:31.960 --> 0:22:33.720 if she saw me jogging. I was like, I want 0:22:33.760 --> 0:22:36.000 to fucking waste the time, right, So, like you write 0:22:36.040 --> 0:22:38.480 those and then you put those within the one story 0:22:38.520 --> 0:22:40.640 I have about jogging that I want to tell. Yeah, 0:22:40.640 --> 0:22:43.679 and then and then you and like right now, my, my, My, 0:22:43.840 --> 0:22:46.960 where I'm letting down is jokes for my daughters because 0:22:46.960 --> 0:22:48.560 they've always been a tent poll of my act. 0:22:48.920 --> 0:22:50.720 I've got a good couple of good stories. 0:22:50.359 --> 0:22:53.640 With Ilah, but I don't have anything like standing out 0:22:53.720 --> 0:22:57.320 for me that's really like and there's little things she 0:22:57.359 --> 0:22:59.120 said because she's growing up. But like the other day, 0:22:59.160 --> 0:23:01.760 I was to a documentar around Gandhi and I was like, 0:23:01.840 --> 0:23:03.320 I just I didn't realize what I said. But I 0:23:03.359 --> 0:23:06.359 was like, I don't really get hunger strikes. And Eila 0:23:06.400 --> 0:23:09.199 looks at me and he goes, no shit, and I 0:23:09.280 --> 0:23:10.840 was like, I was like, I was like, that's a 0:23:10.880 --> 0:23:13.000 good one. And then Georgia, I just said this to 0:23:13.040 --> 0:23:14.720 these guys this morning. I walked out one morning and 0:23:14.760 --> 0:23:16.879 I have my reading glasses on and Georgie goes, hey, 0:23:16.880 --> 0:23:18.240 big I you start your reading glasses on. 0:23:18.320 --> 0:23:20.560 I was like, oh, I must have been bed reading something. 0:23:20.640 --> 0:23:22.880 She goes, oh, were you reading or you just heard 0:23:22.880 --> 0:23:24.640 you weren't just looking at Instagram? 0:23:25.080 --> 0:23:26.800 And I was like, oh, this fucking kid knows me 0:23:26.880 --> 0:23:29.480 so well. Yeah. Meaner jokes, like meaner jokes don't work 0:23:29.520 --> 0:23:29.760 for me. 0:23:30.400 --> 0:23:32.800 I had a joke about, uh, I can't use this, 0:23:33.200 --> 0:23:38.360 but uh about cat calling and it I think, for 0:23:38.400 --> 0:23:41.680 some reason, I think my audience doesn't want to see 0:23:41.720 --> 0:23:44.800 negativity from me. They don't want to be like, come on, 0:23:45.040 --> 0:23:47.840 just that's that fun. I can argue. 0:23:47.640 --> 0:23:49.239 Yeah, a fun little time. 0:23:49.320 --> 0:23:49.760 Yeah. Yeah. 0:23:49.760 --> 0:23:51.720 And it's like Tom can tell a joke about his 0:23:51.800 --> 0:23:55.000 mom eating pussy or something and everyone's like, yeah, or 0:23:55.040 --> 0:23:56.280 sixty nine ing or his mom. 0:23:56.240 --> 0:23:57.720 Or I don't know what he's saying what the joke is? 0:23:57.960 --> 0:24:01.159 Yeah, but people love it, you know, And then for me, 0:24:02.000 --> 0:24:03.960 I can do jokes, but like, I can't be mean 0:24:03.960 --> 0:24:07.840 about Leanne, like I have a joke about if I 0:24:07.880 --> 0:24:09.440 have a joke, that's pretty rough on her. Right now, 0:24:09.800 --> 0:24:11.840 I've got to figure my way out of it. 0:24:12.000 --> 0:24:12.320 I gotta. 0:24:12.320 --> 0:24:14.200 I gotta get my way out of it in order 0:24:14.240 --> 0:24:17.159 to earn the right to tell it, because people love Leanne. 0:24:17.160 --> 0:24:19.400 Like if I start saying something, they go, we love Leanne. 0:24:19.440 --> 0:24:21.720 I'm always like, you don't even fucking know her, Like right, 0:24:22.080 --> 0:24:23.960 how the fuck you? Like I'm married to her, Let 0:24:24.040 --> 0:24:26.040 me say what I want to say, Like. 0:24:26.000 --> 0:24:27.560 But did she get upsett with you at all when. 0:24:27.480 --> 0:24:29.480 You're doing never told me told me jokes I'm not 0:24:29.520 --> 0:24:32.359 allowed to tell Oh really yeah, like this one. 0:24:33.040 --> 0:24:36.240 Yeah, I wasn't gonna. I do want to hear she 0:24:36.320 --> 0:24:37.200 does not like this joke. 0:24:37.280 --> 0:24:37.960 She hates this joke. 0:24:38.160 --> 0:24:38.280 Uh. 0:24:38.840 --> 0:24:40.520 I wanted to have anal sex with her when we 0:24:40.520 --> 0:24:42.639 were dating, and she said why, And I said, I 0:24:42.680 --> 0:24:45.240 don't know. Do I need a reason? Yeah, yeah, I'm 0:24:45.240 --> 0:24:46.400 not going to do it until you have a reason. 0:24:46.400 --> 0:24:47.840 And I go, I don't know. Why do we want 0:24:47.880 --> 0:24:49.320 to get to the moon to beat the Russians there. 0:24:49.320 --> 0:24:51.359 I want to beat the Russians there, and she goes, no, 0:24:51.520 --> 0:24:52.680 I'm not gonna do it until you have a reason. 0:24:52.720 --> 0:24:54.479 And then we got married and I found out when 0:24:54.480 --> 0:24:57.560 you get married, you a crew your partner's debt. So 0:24:57.640 --> 0:24:58.800 I went to my wife and I was like, I 0:24:58.840 --> 0:25:00.400 think I want to have anal sex now, like why, 0:25:00.440 --> 0:25:02.359 and I said, for twenty five grand I want to 0:25:02.359 --> 0:25:03.280 fuck you in the ass. 0:25:03.720 --> 0:25:05.639 And she was like, she was like, I like that joke. 0:25:05.680 --> 0:25:07.080 I don't like that joke, and i'llowed to tell it. 0:25:07.240 --> 0:25:10.399 But she I've told jokes about her, like she farted 0:25:10.440 --> 0:25:13.439 one time during an orgasm and I was like, and 0:25:13.560 --> 0:25:15.320 I was like, I forget the joke. But I was like, 0:25:15.920 --> 0:25:18.040 I was like, you almost shit in my mouth, Like 0:25:18.080 --> 0:25:19.440 you gotta let me know fire in the hole? 0:25:19.520 --> 0:25:19.760 Like what. 0:25:19.800 --> 0:25:21.840 It was a big thing about her farting during an orgasm. 0:25:21.840 --> 0:25:23.679 When I was going down on her, she farted on 0:25:23.680 --> 0:25:27.800 my chin and and and she was like, oh, and 0:25:27.880 --> 0:25:30.679 she's at the end, she started crying and I go, 0:25:30.800 --> 0:25:32.399 what are you crying about? I'm the one that fucking 0:25:32.400 --> 0:25:34.960 got shit in his mouth, Like what are you crying about? 0:25:35.040 --> 0:25:37.359 She goes, you talk about this one stage and I 0:25:37.400 --> 0:25:38.359 was like, oh, you're right. 0:25:38.400 --> 0:25:40.440 I am, Yeah, you're right. The other night I was 0:25:41.400 --> 0:25:42.359 there's been a big one. 0:25:42.680 --> 0:25:44.680 I've had a number of times where I've eaten hot 0:25:44.680 --> 0:25:48.000 wings and then fingered her and fucking lit her up. 0:25:48.200 --> 0:25:50.760 Noh, yeah, there was one time. 0:25:51.080 --> 0:25:53.520 One time I said, I said, I said, hey, Siri, 0:25:53.600 --> 0:25:55.200 how do you get hot sauce out of a pussy? 0:25:55.440 --> 0:25:57.400 And Siri goes, how do you get a football out 0:25:57.400 --> 0:25:59.119 of a pussy? And I went, yeah, how do you 0:25:59.119 --> 0:26:03.639 get a football? It's like stop, just good And I 0:26:03.760 --> 0:26:09.520 was like, oh the knife. 0:26:10.800 --> 0:26:13.639 But yeah, oh my god, dude, I think we've all 0:26:13.680 --> 0:26:16.399 seen that nerve video on on like porn Hub or something. 0:26:16.680 --> 0:26:18.520 What nerve video on the chick like pushes out the 0:26:18.560 --> 0:26:21.320 NERF football. Yeah yeah, yeah, no, shoots it up. 0:26:21.280 --> 0:26:23.400 In the air. You watched it in college? No, I've 0:26:23.400 --> 0:26:25.640 never seen that. I've seen one guy, one cup. I've 0:26:25.640 --> 0:26:26.280 never got it. 0:26:26.320 --> 0:26:29.720 I can't see you guys one three guys one hammer. 0:26:29.840 --> 0:26:32.080 Oh, it's just it's just three guys killing another man. 0:26:32.280 --> 0:26:35.040 It's terrible, it's awful. 0:26:35.400 --> 0:26:37.280 Yeah, there's some weird ship out there. When the dude's 0:26:37.280 --> 0:26:39.800 like beating the funk out of the chick. What yeah, 0:26:39.880 --> 0:26:41.399 bro like slapping the hell out of it. 0:26:41.520 --> 0:26:43.080 I can't. I can't get into the I can't get 0:26:43.080 --> 0:26:43.800 into the I don't. 0:26:43.680 --> 0:26:46.159 Think it's about sexual if you're I'm not into it. 0:26:47.440 --> 0:26:48.200 No, I can't. 0:26:48.280 --> 0:26:50.760 I can't cat like because you know the next thing 0:26:51.160 --> 0:26:53.679 is they're going to take our porn hub searches and 0:26:53.760 --> 0:26:57.200 post them online. Oh man, I want anything that says 0:26:57.720 --> 0:27:04.000 uh step daughter daddy nope, anything that says uh milf nope, 0:27:04.040 --> 0:27:08.199 anything that says step brother, steps sister nope, teenage nope. 0:27:08.359 --> 0:27:12.000 Nothing like that is in my fucking queue. And if 0:27:12.000 --> 0:27:13.639 I have clicked on it, I get out of it immediately. 0:27:13.720 --> 0:27:15.040 I go no, no, no, no, no no. 0:27:15.240 --> 0:27:20.679 I'm like respectable fat wife wants whatever the fuck she wants, 0:27:20.920 --> 0:27:21.960 and the husband. 0:27:21.600 --> 0:27:24.960 Says, man, yeah, because ch missionary. Yeah, you finish in 0:27:24.960 --> 0:27:25.440 your own hand. 0:27:25.520 --> 0:27:26.200 It's all the matters. 0:27:26.240 --> 0:27:29.240 If they release Making Love, if they released what people 0:27:29.280 --> 0:27:33.560 watch like they they it would be like, I mean that, 0:27:33.680 --> 0:27:35.400 the shame is what counts. It's like when they release 0:27:35.480 --> 0:27:38.199 the Sony emails, it was it was a shame that 0:27:38.280 --> 0:27:40.200 they were like, oh my god, you talked about who 0:27:40.320 --> 0:27:42.160 like that and you're like, oh, you can't take that back. 0:27:42.200 --> 0:27:43.720 I know you're not allowed to do that, but they 0:27:43.840 --> 0:27:44.520 just ruined my career. 0:27:44.720 --> 0:27:45.879 I think we'd all figure out that they were all 0:27:45.920 --> 0:27:47.680 pretty fucked up in him, and yeah, no, no, no, 0:27:48.720 --> 0:27:52.000 there's righteous there's righteousness. Like that's why I don't text. 0:27:52.040 --> 0:27:54.320 I don't text it to people that I don't want 0:27:54.359 --> 0:27:54.960 everyone to know. 0:27:55.080 --> 0:27:56.760 See, Okay, here's one thing where I kind of agree 0:27:56.760 --> 0:27:58.600 with you on. When I was in college, when I 0:27:58.600 --> 0:28:00.399 was dating in general, it was like my mission to 0:28:00.400 --> 0:28:03.320 get nudies because in my head I had what I had, 0:28:03.359 --> 0:28:06.199 Like I knew if we ever broke up, i'd have 0:28:06.280 --> 0:28:07.880 those forever. And those are mine now and you can't 0:28:07.920 --> 0:28:10.520 have those back. Like it was a weird, like controlling thing. 0:28:10.960 --> 0:28:13.439 Now with my wife, I don't want any nudity at 0:28:13.480 --> 0:28:16.199 all on my phone. This is zero zero nudity on 0:28:16.240 --> 0:28:17.919 my phone? Is it from me? 0:28:18.520 --> 0:28:18.760 Yeah? 0:28:18.880 --> 0:28:21.080 You know what I'm saying. I take pictures. 0:28:20.720 --> 0:28:21.120 Of my cock. 0:28:21.200 --> 0:28:22.920 Yeah you got it. You got some nudity of me. 0:28:23.440 --> 0:28:26.359 You don't take pictures of the cock. Oh yeah, by the. 0:28:26.359 --> 0:28:28.200 Way, I do. If I got a photo of my 0:28:28.280 --> 0:28:29.400 cock on his phone, I do. 0:28:29.520 --> 0:28:33.560 I I sent Shane gillis a picture of my dick 0:28:34.040 --> 0:28:39.240 the other day and uh and he uh he, I'll 0:28:39.240 --> 0:28:39.719 pull it up. 0:28:40.360 --> 0:28:43.560 And he was on a plane. Oh no, yeah, do 0:28:43.600 --> 0:28:45.480 you guys know Shane. Yeah, he was in the pod 0:28:45.480 --> 0:28:46.160 a couple of days ago. 0:28:47.120 --> 0:28:47.360 Great. 0:28:47.960 --> 0:28:51.400 I sent Shane a picture of my dick and he 0:28:54.000 --> 0:28:57.440 and he goes, I'm on a plane now and the 0:28:57.440 --> 0:29:02.760 guys sitting next to me saw peaceful pictures of my dick, Like, 0:29:03.280 --> 0:29:05.080 I send them pictures of a picture of my dick. 0:29:05.120 --> 0:29:07.360 One time to su girl. But it was a shadow 0:29:07.480 --> 0:29:10.040 of my dick. It was breaking into a house. Yeah, 0:29:10.360 --> 0:29:12.280 and the shadow you can't Yeah, I just had the 0:29:12.400 --> 0:29:15.640 light the shadow against the wall, so it's a shadow 0:29:15.680 --> 0:29:18.080 like towards the door handle dick. 0:29:18.120 --> 0:29:19.640 And it was like he was like, is that your dick? 0:29:19.680 --> 0:29:23.680 And I was like, yeah, that's fucking hilarious. 0:29:23.800 --> 0:29:25.360 Yeah, what are you taking a picture of your dick now? 0:29:25.440 --> 0:29:27.719 No, No, I'm trying to show you some u a 0:29:27.760 --> 0:29:30.120 buddy that reminds me of you. He would always send 0:29:30.120 --> 0:29:32.080 me these kinds of photos. This is way back in 0:29:32.120 --> 0:29:32.400 the day. 0:29:32.400 --> 0:29:37.000 This is two thousand and nine. That's I love this 0:29:37.080 --> 0:29:44.120 guy already. Yeah, let me see that photos of him 0:29:44.160 --> 0:29:45.880 doing that. Sometimes he like tuck and just like pose 0:29:45.920 --> 0:29:46.520 against the wall. 0:29:46.920 --> 0:29:47.520 Ninth grade. 0:29:47.600 --> 0:29:50.440 Ninth grade, my big fucking move was, and we're talking 0:29:50.440 --> 0:29:54.400 about huge parties, is I could tuck my dick and 0:29:54.480 --> 0:29:58.760 balls between my leg but not enough and just enough 0:29:58.800 --> 0:30:01.800 that it looked like an actual well vagina like I had. 0:30:01.920 --> 0:30:04.680 I had shaped it dick on one side, ball on 0:30:04.720 --> 0:30:06.800 the other right and pull them back to. 0:30:06.760 --> 0:30:09.120 What looked like a pussy. And it was. 0:30:09.520 --> 0:30:12.200 I mean, and there are so many pictures of me 0:30:12.520 --> 0:30:17.080 in ninth grade just like and and this was my move, 0:30:17.160 --> 0:30:19.360 Like these were like this was my move up until 0:30:19.360 --> 0:30:20.520 like senior year of high school. 0:30:20.520 --> 0:30:21.960 I was like, I think I'm getting old for this, 0:30:22.080 --> 0:30:25.920 guys and getting over this. And they were we were girls. 0:30:25.960 --> 0:30:28.160 We're like, do the fucking vagina, and they're going, it 0:30:28.160 --> 0:30:30.440 looks just like it, and I fucking the Tomio twins 0:30:30.440 --> 0:30:31.320 were like do it. 0:30:31.440 --> 0:30:32.680 Do it? It looks just like it. 0:30:32.760 --> 0:30:33.000 Do it? 0:30:33.040 --> 0:30:35.240 And then I do it and everyone be like should 0:30:35.440 --> 0:30:37.560 It looked identical. And by the way, I had never 0:30:37.560 --> 0:30:39.760 seen a pussy at that time. Yeah, and you were 0:30:39.760 --> 0:30:44.440 in the fight then, yeah, yeah, I was. I I 0:30:44.520 --> 0:30:46.480 was fucking I thought i'd be slaying pussy and then 0:30:46.600 --> 0:30:47.640 alone I'm making them. 0:30:47.800 --> 0:30:49.040 Yeah, you put yourself in a little bit of a 0:30:49.080 --> 0:30:50.360 box when you're showing your own pussy. 0:30:50.440 --> 0:30:50.640 Yeah. 0:30:50.720 --> 0:30:52.880 Yeah, yeah, you become the funny guy that it's hard 0:30:52.880 --> 0:30:55.120 to kiss. You can't turn it off, and you're like. 0:30:55.080 --> 0:30:58.120 Hey, hey, want to see the pussy. Hey, o game. 0:30:59.360 --> 0:31:03.160 I've never been the guy that could kiss like I couldn't. No, no, 0:31:03.200 --> 0:31:06.239 I can kiss for the first kiss. I can't lean 0:31:06.320 --> 0:31:08.560 him for the first tough deal. I always had a 0:31:08.560 --> 0:31:11.240 hard time navigating that as well. This is a this 0:31:11.280 --> 0:31:15.160 should be a ted talk is I would like to know? 0:31:15.680 --> 0:31:17.240 I mean I don't need to know now, but like 0:31:18.400 --> 0:31:20.320 I would have, I would have signed up for like 0:31:20.360 --> 0:31:23.400 a twenty dollars online class of like how to lean 0:31:23.440 --> 0:31:24.320 in for the front. 0:31:24.360 --> 0:31:26.880 Oh they've done that, they do that. It's on Hitch, 0:31:27.040 --> 0:31:27.720 the movie Hitch. 0:31:28.040 --> 0:31:28.640 Really yeah? 0:31:28.680 --> 0:31:32.080 Oh yeah you go you go you yeah? Yeah? Will 0:31:32.080 --> 0:31:34.120 Smith thinks you in Hitch with Kevin James. 0:31:34.640 --> 0:31:37.040 You go ninety they go ten. Yeah you haven't seen Hitch. 0:31:37.480 --> 0:31:39.000 Yeah I have, I don't remember the movie. 0:31:39.040 --> 0:31:41.960 He goes up, he's teaching was it Kevin what Kevin James? 0:31:42.040 --> 0:31:44.800 Kevin James. He's leaning in his I ninety, you go ten. 0:31:45.280 --> 0:31:47.400 If you're the guy, you're supposed to go ninety kind 0:31:47.400 --> 0:31:48.720 of linger, there a way for them to go ten, 0:31:48.880 --> 0:31:50.320 Dowar at the end of the night, after the Yeah, 0:31:50.360 --> 0:31:52.320 I was I was so bad at it. 0:31:52.560 --> 0:31:54.480 I was so bad at it that I would go 0:31:54.520 --> 0:31:56.480 on a first date and if I if, I would 0:31:56.480 --> 0:31:58.440 be like, all right, I'm not gonna go in for 0:31:58.480 --> 0:32:00.200 the kiss on the first date. If it feels right, 0:32:00.200 --> 0:32:02.880 I will never felt right. Second date, okay, we'll see 0:32:02.880 --> 0:32:05.000 how it will goes. And then by the fourth date, 0:32:05.040 --> 0:32:07.960 I'm like, all right, I'm just gonna tell her I'm gay. 0:32:10.360 --> 0:32:12.360 I mean there are girls, there are girls friend, Yeah, 0:32:12.600 --> 0:32:15.240 there are girls that I dated that I never kissed. 0:32:15.360 --> 0:32:17.640 I dated I never kissed, and I just was like 0:32:18.240 --> 0:32:20.160 and then it gets too awkward. And then when you 0:32:20.200 --> 0:32:21.640 do kiss them, their eyes are like this, like what 0:32:21.680 --> 0:32:22.920 are you doing? You're like, I don't know. This is 0:32:22.960 --> 0:32:25.000 what I wanted to do a week ago, but I 0:32:25.000 --> 0:32:25.760 didn't try it. 0:32:26.280 --> 0:32:29.160 That's a bad combo. Man couldn't kiss or have sex 0:32:29.360 --> 0:32:33.560 when you're young. Yeah, that's hard me too, Hashag. I'll 0:32:33.560 --> 0:32:34.000 tell you that. 0:32:34.080 --> 0:32:35.960 Yeah, you mean the gay guy that. 0:32:35.960 --> 0:32:38.800 Couldn't kiss me. Yeah, I think we're good guy. 0:32:38.800 --> 0:32:41.160 They coudn't kiss me. As far as Will Smith goes, 0:32:41.160 --> 0:32:42.720 your boys or girl really drew a line in the 0:32:42.720 --> 0:32:45.640 sand love that was stand with him and Chris Rock 0:32:46.040 --> 0:32:46.600 He uh. 0:32:46.520 --> 0:32:48.240 Yeah, it's a good guy to be a business partner 0:32:48.240 --> 0:32:49.840 with the guy that don't mind burning it to the 0:32:49.880 --> 0:32:52.440 fucking ground in Hollywood. I was like, hey, fuck face, 0:32:52.520 --> 0:32:54.840 we have a TV movie deal set up. Let's let's 0:32:54.880 --> 0:32:56.840 maybe not go after everyone. 0:32:57.080 --> 0:32:57.320 Yeah. 0:32:57.400 --> 0:33:00.600 He was like, fuck him. That's Tom though he he 0:33:00.720 --> 0:33:01.080 is not. 0:33:01.200 --> 0:33:02.360 He likes in the world burn. 0:33:02.480 --> 0:33:06.320 He does not give a fuck Like I give a fuck. 0:33:06.400 --> 0:33:08.719 I give a fuck about a lot of things. Tom 0:33:08.920 --> 0:33:13.160 genuinely I do not get it. Just does not care 0:33:14.320 --> 0:33:17.400 pro wrestling. Pro wrestling is fake and if you like it, 0:33:17.640 --> 0:33:20.840 you're retarded. That's Tom Segura. And then and and do 0:33:20.880 --> 0:33:24.400 you know how passionate wrestling fans are. When wrestler goes, hey, man, 0:33:24.760 --> 0:33:26.560 I'll show you how fake it is, and Tom's like, 0:33:26.880 --> 0:33:30.600 come over here, catches smoke and this guy's like, guy's like, 0:33:30.840 --> 0:33:33.000 I'm scary, and Tom goes, you're not real. 0:33:36.320 --> 0:33:38.160 He just doesn't care. He does not care. 0:33:39.320 --> 0:33:43.440 The guy I mean, it's it's it's the beauty of 0:33:43.520 --> 0:33:46.480 him on a podcast. It's the beauty of him as 0:33:46.520 --> 0:33:48.320 a person, it's a beauty of him as a comic. 0:33:48.640 --> 0:33:50.800 I mean, we we did a bit when we first 0:33:50.840 --> 0:33:51.680 started the podcast. 0:33:51.800 --> 0:33:55.440 He goes, let's say the most horrific things we can 0:33:55.520 --> 0:33:58.640 think of that, taken out of context, would ruin our career. 0:33:59.000 --> 0:34:00.560 Let's see who can out to each other. 0:34:01.720 --> 0:34:03.320 That is h lyrics. I can't believe we did it. 0:34:03.480 --> 0:34:06.360 We did it, and now those clips are everywhere. I'm 0:34:06.400 --> 0:34:07.080 not doing it again. 0:34:07.880 --> 0:34:08.600 Yeah, fair enough. 0:34:09.120 --> 0:34:11.399 It was. It was the worst, Like. 0:34:11.600 --> 0:34:13.680 I think personally, I think that kind of gets a 0:34:13.719 --> 0:34:16.600 bad rap like and it's just like and the most 0:34:16.960 --> 0:34:19.040 and we just and we couldn't stop laughing at how 0:34:19.120 --> 0:34:21.239 fucking bad it was. And then and then like a 0:34:21.280 --> 0:34:23.000 year later, we're like, maybe we shouldn't have done that, 0:34:23.239 --> 0:34:25.080 and you're like, well, when you are doing it right 0:34:25.080 --> 0:34:26.800 when we started two Bears, like that's the first episode 0:34:26.800 --> 0:34:32.400 I think Bears, Uh, I don't know, Uh, it's before 0:34:32.440 --> 0:34:35.439 the pandemic. And then we were doing it every other 0:34:35.760 --> 0:34:37.520 week and we were like, we'll just have fun with it. 0:34:37.560 --> 0:34:39.319 And I was doing the Bill Bird at the time. 0:34:39.800 --> 0:34:41.960 And so it was like Bill Burt one week, Two 0:34:42.000 --> 0:34:44.680 Bears another week. And then when the pandemic hit, we 0:34:44.719 --> 0:34:45.920 were like, we got nothing but time. You want to 0:34:45.960 --> 0:34:47.600 do it every week? And once we started doing it 0:34:47.600 --> 0:34:50.680 every week, we had a couple viral moments where like, uh, 0:34:50.760 --> 0:34:52.160 he found out I was drinking a gallon. 0:34:51.960 --> 0:34:52.839 Of kool Aid every day? 0:34:53.080 --> 0:34:57.240 Dude, that was you know what, it's so funny. I remember, 0:34:57.640 --> 0:35:01.239 I remember doing it. I remember there, I remember it 0:35:01.320 --> 0:35:03.520 being funny to us, but I don't remember being as 0:35:03.560 --> 0:35:07.880 funny as it was to watch. Because we're at my 0:35:07.960 --> 0:35:11.520 sister's house one time and my brother in law goes, 0:35:12.160 --> 0:35:13.759 hey to my dadd He goes, have you ever seen 0:35:13.840 --> 0:35:16.960 Bert and Tom's show Two Bears? 0:35:16.960 --> 0:35:18.719 And my dad goes, no, is it? Is it any good? 0:35:18.719 --> 0:35:19.200 What I like it? 0:35:19.239 --> 0:35:20.560 And he goes, let me show you a clip, and 0:35:20.600 --> 0:35:23.200 he played the kool Aid clip, and I was My 0:35:23.320 --> 0:35:26.920 daughters were laughing, my wife was laughing, but me and 0:35:26.920 --> 0:35:28.080 my daughter's my wife, they know I. 0:35:28.120 --> 0:35:30.040 Drink a gawn of kol Aid every day, and so 0:35:30.080 --> 0:35:30.680 they to. 0:35:30.640 --> 0:35:33.440 Them it wasn't They didn't realize how ridiculous it was 0:35:33.760 --> 0:35:37.960 until Tom said it, and we were crying laughing, and 0:35:38.000 --> 0:35:39.680 then the Jennifer Andiston clip went. 0:35:39.600 --> 0:35:43.680 Viral of like, oh, bro, so funny Tom does. 0:35:43.960 --> 0:35:45.000 Tom tells a story. 0:35:44.800 --> 0:35:47.840 About going over to Jennifer Anderson's house and and he 0:35:47.960 --> 0:35:50.000 knows that like, out of the two of us, out 0:35:50.000 --> 0:35:52.000 of the two of us, Tom is friends with all 0:35:52.000 --> 0:35:53.520 the celebrities he's on the d L. 0:35:53.600 --> 0:35:54.680 He's like, pretty cool about it. 0:35:54.760 --> 0:35:57.000 He doesn't tell you that, like Brad Pitt's one of 0:35:57.040 --> 0:36:00.160 his friends, right right, but he knows that that I 0:36:00.200 --> 0:36:02.560 would love to be Brad's Pitt friend. I also, I'm 0:36:02.560 --> 0:36:04.759 not the guy that's gonna try to be Brad Pitt's friend. Look, 0:36:04.800 --> 0:36:06.520 Tom's the guy that's like, hey, tell my agent Tom 0:36:06.520 --> 0:36:08.160 me coming down to my show. I'd love to meet him. 0:36:08.360 --> 0:36:10.560 That's why I text him about Aaron Rodgers. Tom's good, 0:36:10.560 --> 0:36:12.000 but that shit, and he knows how to do it. 0:36:12.120 --> 0:36:14.280 I don't know how to navigate those but he knows 0:36:14.840 --> 0:36:16.920 that I would love to meet Jannier Ranason. I'd love 0:36:16.920 --> 0:36:18.520 to meet Brad bad I'd love to meet all those people. 0:36:19.320 --> 0:36:21.400 So he says, I told you I met Jenna Ranison. 0:36:21.440 --> 0:36:23.520 I go hold on, you know we were supposed to 0:36:23.520 --> 0:36:24.640 do this is the theme and he was like, well, 0:36:24.719 --> 0:36:25.319 let me tell you the story. 0:36:25.400 --> 0:36:26.759 He tells me the fucking story. 0:36:27.040 --> 0:36:32.319 And and it's a lie and I go, you motherfucker 0:36:32.440 --> 0:36:32.959 and he goes. 0:36:33.239 --> 0:36:35.120 He goes, I thought it would piss you off. I said, 0:36:35.120 --> 0:36:35.440 what if? 0:36:35.480 --> 0:36:37.600 But let's make rules if we ever meet Janner Brandiston 0:36:38.000 --> 0:36:40.960 and he says okay. I was like, should we do it? 0:36:41.280 --> 0:36:43.719 Should we bring our wives? And he goes no, not, 0:36:43.760 --> 0:36:46.799 definitely not. And I go, okay, should we do it 0:36:46.800 --> 0:36:47.279 at your house? 0:36:47.360 --> 0:36:47.600 Or I go? 0:36:47.600 --> 0:36:48.840 I go, should we do it at your house or 0:36:48.880 --> 0:36:51.239 my house? And he goes, we'll do it. I go, 0:36:51.320 --> 0:36:52.480 when I do it at my house, it's a piece 0:36:52.480 --> 0:36:53.680 of shit. We're doing it at your house. He goes, 0:36:53.680 --> 0:36:55.439 we should do it at her house. I go, ye, yeah, yeah, 0:36:55.440 --> 0:36:56.800 we'll do it at her house. And I go should 0:36:56.800 --> 0:36:58.560 we bring our wives? And we're like no, And I 0:36:58.640 --> 0:37:01.680 go can she bring someone? He goes, yeah, maybe like 0:37:01.719 --> 0:37:04.120 a guy for safety. And then he stops himself and 0:37:04.120 --> 0:37:05.600 he goes, maybe that's not the message you want to 0:37:05.640 --> 0:37:09.759 be sending. And I could not stop laughing because it's 0:37:09.800 --> 0:37:12.200 the thing. It's the thing that I like about Tom 0:37:12.280 --> 0:37:14.800 that no one I don't underthink the other people see 0:37:15.160 --> 0:37:16.560 was when he goes, maybe that's not the message you 0:37:16.560 --> 0:37:17.120 want to be sending. 0:37:17.280 --> 0:37:18.400 I could not stop laughing. 0:37:18.600 --> 0:37:20.560 I could not stop laughing that we would go bring 0:37:20.560 --> 0:37:22.920 someone for safety, and we could not stop laughing. And 0:37:22.920 --> 0:37:25.640 then Jennifer Anderson saw it and fucking hit us up. 0:37:25.880 --> 0:37:28.360 Tom texted me, he goes check your fucking DMS. I 0:37:28.400 --> 0:37:31.200 go why, and he goes, just check your DMS And 0:37:31.280 --> 0:37:33.239 I go to my damns and he starts going done. 0:37:33.239 --> 0:37:36.000 No no, no, no, no no no. I'm like what and 0:37:36.000 --> 0:37:38.120 he's Jennifer Anison. You guys are fucking hilarious. This is 0:37:38.160 --> 0:37:39.720 so great. I just saw this and we're. 0:37:39.520 --> 0:37:40.640 Like, shut the fuck up. 0:37:40.719 --> 0:37:43.000 He's like, Jen'm like losing our shit. 0:37:43.239 --> 0:37:43.439 Yeah. 0:37:43.520 --> 0:37:46.520 But like those two moments went viral on and then 0:37:46.600 --> 0:37:48.239 and then I think, you know, there's we've had some 0:37:48.280 --> 0:37:50.920 good episodes. The last episode we did, we ended up 0:37:50.960 --> 0:37:54.000 both ended up crying at the end randomly, randomly, didn't 0:37:54.040 --> 0:37:56.680 mean to. It was his birthday episode. These next two 0:37:56.680 --> 0:38:00.640 episodes are fucking bangers because we were in a good place. 0:38:00.680 --> 0:38:03.520 I just got in stem cells and like it's We've 0:38:03.520 --> 0:38:05.680 been on a run lately of having really good episodes, 0:38:05.960 --> 0:38:07.000 really good episodes, but. 0:38:07.200 --> 0:38:09.640 Uh, a lot of that had taken off for you guys, 0:38:09.640 --> 0:38:11.600 like during the pandemic with both of your specials coming 0:38:11.600 --> 0:38:13.920 out and then you're going weekly, you go viral a 0:38:13.960 --> 0:38:14.600 couple of times. 0:38:14.680 --> 0:38:14.879 Yeah. 0:38:14.920 --> 0:38:18.120 Yeah, both our specials came out during that pandemic and 0:38:18.160 --> 0:38:21.520 that was really fucking huge and we started leaning in 0:38:21.640 --> 0:38:25.239 double down on content and uh. And then I did 0:38:25.239 --> 0:38:30.920 the part of the tour and the movie theaters out 0:38:30.920 --> 0:38:33.920 to our movie theaters drive in, and that was big. 0:38:34.000 --> 0:38:35.680 And I think we both just had big moments. I 0:38:35.680 --> 0:38:38.239 did the movie. I think all that started coming in 0:38:38.280 --> 0:38:42.319 and adding up and and I don't know, I love it. 0:38:42.360 --> 0:38:43.440 I love doing Two Bears. 0:38:43.440 --> 0:38:45.440 It's one of my favorite things in the world because I, 0:38:45.600 --> 0:38:47.960 like I said, I mean, I know Tom is a 0:38:48.040 --> 0:38:50.080 very funny comic and I know that people like him. 0:38:50.160 --> 0:38:52.120 But the thing I like about him is when we're 0:38:52.280 --> 0:38:55.000 doing Two Bearers, like the way he makes me laugh. 0:38:55.320 --> 0:38:57.480 I don't think he does that for everybody, but but 0:38:57.520 --> 0:39:00.279 when he makes me laugh, dude, it's my favorite. 0:39:00.040 --> 0:39:02.400 Thing in the world too. Well. 0:39:02.440 --> 0:39:04.480 I love I love laughing. 0:39:04.800 --> 0:39:07.440 But the things he does is like when we're in 0:39:07.440 --> 0:39:09.920 a car one time and he goes how many times. 0:39:09.960 --> 0:39:12.600 Do you think you burp a day? And I went, 0:39:12.840 --> 0:39:14.799 I don't know. I don't think I burp very often. 0:39:14.840 --> 0:39:17.360 He goes, You're wrong. He goes, I've counted twelve in 0:39:17.360 --> 0:39:20.400 the last fifteen minutes, and I went for real, He's like, 0:39:20.480 --> 0:39:22.160 you don't know you're doing this. They smell like shit, 0:39:22.239 --> 0:39:24.399 and I'm like, are you am I burping? And he goes, 0:39:24.840 --> 0:39:26.440 are you being serious? He goes give it a second, 0:39:26.760 --> 0:39:28.000 and then all of a sudden, I burp. I go, God, 0:39:28.040 --> 0:39:31.320 damn it, I'm burping. He goes, yeah, and like that's Tom. 0:39:31.480 --> 0:39:35.719 That Like there's so many things I fucking that makes 0:39:35.760 --> 0:39:38.439 me giggle from that dude, and especially like the Will 0:39:38.480 --> 0:39:42.200 Smith tweet. Tom Like when he goes he goes, he 0:39:42.239 --> 0:39:44.000 calls me. He goes, have you seen my Will Smith sweet? 0:39:44.000 --> 0:39:45.239 And I saw that one earlier. I go yeah, and 0:39:45.320 --> 0:39:47.239 he goes, no, the new one, I went, Tom, and 0:39:47.280 --> 0:39:50.640 he goes, it's worse and then I fucking look at 0:39:50.680 --> 0:39:53.440 it and he's crying, laughing, and he goes read it 0:39:53.440 --> 0:39:55.480 out loud to me, and then I read it back 0:39:55.520 --> 0:39:55.879 to him. 0:39:56.360 --> 0:39:59.279 I mean, he is just why does he hate Will 0:39:59.320 --> 0:40:00.280 Smith so much? 0:40:00.600 --> 0:40:03.200 He because I love Will Smith. Oh yeah, yeah, because 0:40:03.239 --> 0:40:05.040 I think he just knows. I've talked about how much 0:40:05.040 --> 0:40:07.200 I love Hill Smith, Lady. 0:40:09.920 --> 0:40:12.520 His sense of humor is so fucking different. 0:40:13.520 --> 0:40:15.759 Like he goes, this is one of my favorite This 0:40:15.800 --> 0:40:18.480 is just a quote A Tom's a quote that I 0:40:18.520 --> 0:40:21.880 think of all the time he was in he was 0:40:21.880 --> 0:40:24.279 doing a show. He can deny that this happened. He's 0:40:24.320 --> 0:40:26.120 allowed to exciting. It's pretty agressive, but it's one of 0:40:26.160 --> 0:40:28.880 my favorite things ever. Shane Torres says it's the favorite 0:40:28.920 --> 0:40:30.520 thing he's ever seen Tom do. 0:40:31.160 --> 0:40:33.680 Tom's talking to a black dude in the audience. 0:40:33.760 --> 0:40:39.520 Now, for whatever reason, Tom gets along with black dudes 0:40:39.560 --> 0:40:40.600 easier than anyone. 0:40:40.600 --> 0:40:41.440 I think it's sports. 0:40:41.719 --> 0:40:45.280 But like he's friends with Mike Tyson, friends with DJ Premier, 0:40:45.560 --> 0:40:48.400 friends with Big Daddy Kane, friends with all these dudes 0:40:48.719 --> 0:40:52.640 like friends. So he's talking to this guy in the 0:40:52.719 --> 0:40:57.359 audience and he goes he said, says something about being 0:40:57.400 --> 0:41:00.400 a black dude, and the guy goes, I'm a right up, 0:41:00.800 --> 0:41:04.000 straight up black dude, BROV. And Tom goes, no, you're not. 0:41:04.040 --> 0:41:07.080 Where the fuck are you from? He goes live BROV 0:41:07.520 --> 0:41:10.600 and he goes, I was talking about a real black guy. 0:41:10.880 --> 0:41:13.200 The kind that licks his lips and plays with his dick. 0:41:19.760 --> 0:41:23.680 This piece of fucking picture and there you go, How the. 0:41:23.520 --> 0:41:24.680 Fuck did you think of that? 0:41:24.800 --> 0:41:27.000 Like lists a place in his dick. 0:41:29.440 --> 0:41:32.720 It's such one of my favorite things he's ever said, 0:41:32.840 --> 0:41:34.840 and it was it was told to me by a friend. 0:41:35.080 --> 0:41:37.000 He goes, I was just watching, he was just doing 0:41:37.040 --> 0:41:41.400 crowd work. That's the fucking that's the you know what 0:41:41.440 --> 0:41:43.839 I mean. No, you're not real. It's funny you get 0:41:43.880 --> 0:41:44.399 so many of those. 0:41:44.440 --> 0:41:46.120 I remember one time seeing a dude, black dude in 0:41:46.120 --> 0:41:49.279 the audience and I go and his chick. He was 0:41:49.280 --> 0:41:52.279 on first date with the chick, and I go, I 0:41:52.280 --> 0:41:54.200 said something about black dudes. She goes, he's black, and 0:41:54.200 --> 0:41:56.840 I went, nah, he's from uh, from somewhere. 0:41:57.200 --> 0:41:59.560 He's not. He's not like American black dude. He goes, 0:41:59.680 --> 0:42:00.319 yes he is. 0:42:00.840 --> 0:42:03.880 I go, no, you don't know them apparently, and the 0:42:03.960 --> 0:42:04.880 guy hasn't said anything. 0:42:05.440 --> 0:42:07.719 Go. She goes, no, we're not on a date. 0:42:07.760 --> 0:42:09.560 I'm looking at him and I go, no, no, no, no, 0:42:09.800 --> 0:42:12.120 we need to look at his shoes real quick. I go, no, 0:42:12.120 --> 0:42:14.399 American black dude, whatever wear those shoes. Where are you from, buddy, 0:42:14.440 --> 0:42:18.080 where are you from? And he goes, Manchesta and I went, yeah. 0:42:18.200 --> 0:42:20.080 She goes, wait, how did you figure that on his shoes? 0:42:20.120 --> 0:42:22.000 I go, they're racing shoes. They're Ferrari shoes. 0:42:22.000 --> 0:42:25.440 They're like the tiny sold They're not anything that an 0:42:25.440 --> 0:42:28.120 American would wear. They look like they're f one shoes, 0:42:28.160 --> 0:42:30.439 you know, like little tiny shoes. I go, that's something 0:42:30.480 --> 0:42:33.319 Americans don't wear. Let alone, brothers don't wear that shit. 0:42:33.680 --> 0:42:36.279 There's like, but you call that shit out huh oh, yeah, 0:42:36.280 --> 0:42:38.799 well there's been. There's well, there's certain things that made 0:42:38.800 --> 0:42:40.960 me fucking crazy a stand up, and that's when like 0:42:41.280 --> 0:42:43.680 people aren't going to be honest with themselves. That's the 0:42:43.719 --> 0:42:46.600 one thing that makes me the fucking craziest. And especially 0:42:46.680 --> 0:42:50.080 when they think they're being politically correct and they're they're 0:42:50.160 --> 0:42:53.760 lying to themselves like I was. I remember I learned 0:42:53.760 --> 0:42:57.279 one time that the hard way. I went to go 0:42:57.360 --> 0:42:59.640 play basketball and I bought a pair of Jordan's and 0:42:59.719 --> 0:43:01.839 Kevin Heart saw me in those Jordans and they said 0:43:01.880 --> 0:43:02.960 where are you going? And I said, I'm going to 0:43:02.960 --> 0:43:05.040 play basketball and he went, you don't play basketball in 0:43:05.080 --> 0:43:08.480 Jordan's And I went, hm. He goes, He's like, you 0:43:08.560 --> 0:43:10.240 just put a one hundred twenty dollars a pair of shoes. 0:43:10.360 --> 0:43:11.719 You're not gonna go fuck them up on a back. 0:43:11.760 --> 0:43:13.839 He goes, do not wear them to a basketball court. 0:43:14.000 --> 0:43:16.640 You will get you. They won't let you play. And 0:43:16.680 --> 0:43:18.480 I said, I said, you're out of your mind. I 0:43:18.520 --> 0:43:21.359 go to a basketball court with these Jordans on, and 0:43:21.400 --> 0:43:23.279 these black dudes are like, take them off. We'll beat 0:43:23.320 --> 0:43:25.440 your asset and take them off you before we let 0:43:25.440 --> 0:43:27.960 you ruin those shoes. Do not play in those fucking shoes. 0:43:28.040 --> 0:43:29.320 Get to a pair of shoes from the trunk of 0:43:29.360 --> 0:43:31.200 your car. Take those off right now. And I go, 0:43:31.239 --> 0:43:32.640 I'm gonna play in their shoes, and like, we're not 0:43:32.640 --> 0:43:34.680 gonna let You're not allowed to play. And I was like, what, 0:43:35.440 --> 0:43:39.440 brothers do not play basketball in Jordan's Like their Jordans are, 0:43:39.480 --> 0:43:42.080 like they're nice shoes. They're really nice shoes, by the way, 0:43:42.320 --> 0:43:44.360 And now that I know shoes the way I know shoes, 0:43:44.560 --> 0:43:47.880 I would never buy a pair of fucking Jordans to 0:43:47.920 --> 0:43:48.640 play basketball. 0:43:48.640 --> 0:43:49.440 I buy a pair of. 0:43:49.480 --> 0:43:52.000 Basketball shoes, right, like a nice pair of basketball shoes. 0:43:53.880 --> 0:43:57.520 So we're in Hollywood and I'm listening to this this 0:43:57.680 --> 0:44:02.000 actor talk and he's waxing poetically about racism and indifference 0:44:02.040 --> 0:44:05.239 and then you know whatever, and he said, then, then 0:44:05.239 --> 0:44:08.440 they're going to suggest that black kids don't play hockey 0:44:08.520 --> 0:44:11.400 because of the gear, and they don't play golf because 0:44:11.440 --> 0:44:13.040 of the gear, that it's too expensive. 0:44:13.320 --> 0:44:14.160 That's bullshit. 0:44:14.600 --> 0:44:17.879 And I went, no, I that's actually totally why. That's 0:44:17.920 --> 0:44:20.040 totally why that you don't see a lot of black 0:44:20.200 --> 0:44:23.200 is playing. If you're you can't, if you're from the 0:44:23.239 --> 0:44:25.359 inner city, you can't just buy a whole hockey gear 0:44:25.360 --> 0:44:27.600 and it's just expensive. And then that's that's kind of 0:44:27.640 --> 0:44:30.880 the the green fees. That's why, that's how racism works. 0:44:30.920 --> 0:44:34.160 And he goes, bullshit, explain to me how they explain 0:44:34.239 --> 0:44:36.680 to me how they can afford these Jordans to play 0:44:36.719 --> 0:44:38.319 basketball then, and I said, oh, you don't know any 0:44:38.320 --> 0:44:40.920 black people. And he goes what I said, you've never 0:44:40.960 --> 0:44:43.160 met a black person. Oh, you need to meet black people, 0:44:43.280 --> 0:44:45.680 because I have a friend Kevin Hardy told me you 0:44:45.719 --> 0:44:49.080 don't play basketball in Jordan's And then the guy's adopted 0:44:49.160 --> 0:44:53.239 son comes out and he's black and he is fucked. 0:44:52.960 --> 0:44:53.839 Up Jordan's. 0:44:59.040 --> 0:45:00.759 Dinner party. My wife it was like, we'll be going 0:45:00.800 --> 0:45:03.080 thank you everybody. He's a big fucking actor. He was 0:45:03.120 --> 0:45:07.680 a big fucking actor. And I was like, he walked 0:45:07.719 --> 0:45:10.480 in with the basketball and just trash brand. 0:45:10.239 --> 0:45:13.720 New jordans Man. I was like a dinner party. 0:45:14.200 --> 0:45:14.399 Yeah. 0:45:14.440 --> 0:45:18.200 He had good, fucked up dinner parties so bad. I 0:45:18.239 --> 0:45:20.120 remember one time there were these two gay dudes and 0:45:20.120 --> 0:45:22.040 they were talking about not liking the taste to come, 0:45:22.360 --> 0:45:24.919 and I thought they were talking about rum and I. 0:45:24.920 --> 0:45:27.640 Just joined in with my story of my first experience 0:45:27.640 --> 0:45:27.920 with it. 0:45:28.000 --> 0:45:29.480 Yeah, and I was like, I remember when I tried 0:45:29.480 --> 0:45:30.799 it the first time. I'm like, what the fuck are 0:45:30.800 --> 0:45:32.400 you talking about? And I was like I was like 0:45:32.520 --> 0:45:33.960 ninth grade. We're out at the beach my buddies and 0:45:34.000 --> 0:45:35.680 are like, pirates do it? We should try it right, 0:45:35.760 --> 0:45:39.279 and they're like it was like there was a lot 0:45:39.280 --> 0:45:41.120 of gag in that night, boys, but we got it 0:45:41.200 --> 0:45:42.880 down now. It wasn't until I did it with my 0:45:42.960 --> 0:45:44.839 dad and he's like a little pineapple makes it taste better. 0:45:44.840 --> 0:45:46.719 And my wife's like, what the fuck are you talking about? 0:45:46.760 --> 0:45:48.600 And I go rum right, she goes no com and 0:45:48.600 --> 0:45:55.400 I went ahead, never mind the way he do fucking 0:45:55.400 --> 0:45:56.920 five hours with you guys, this is a. 0:45:58.920 --> 0:46:02.919 We're having a great time. Georgia Boot. Georgia Boot makes 0:46:03.160 --> 0:46:07.120 super good looking and super comfortable boots, so comfortable you 0:46:07.239 --> 0:46:09.839 never want to take them off. These boots hold up 0:46:09.840 --> 0:46:12.480 in any condition without sacrifice or comfort. For those of 0:46:12.520 --> 0:46:15.960 you who live in Nashville, Tennessee, you know the times 0:46:15.960 --> 0:46:21.120 between January and April you want to your life because 0:46:21.120 --> 0:46:25.080 the weather is out of hand. So your boys got ducks. 0:46:25.280 --> 0:46:27.720 And when I bought the ducks, I thought, raise the ducks, 0:46:27.800 --> 0:46:30.680 Ducks leave. Ducks are happy, they have duck babies, they 0:46:30.719 --> 0:46:33.759 live duck lives, and they move on. They didn't do that. 0:46:34.360 --> 0:46:36.919 So now every day your boys gotta get up, put 0:46:36.960 --> 0:46:42.360 his Georgia boots on and make the trek rain, sleet, snow, sunshine, 0:46:42.400 --> 0:46:44.600 and you hope it's the fourth, but it's usually those three. 0:46:45.000 --> 0:46:47.719 And those times I walk over to the coop, I 0:46:47.760 --> 0:46:50.440 open the coop up. The ducks I know are talking 0:46:50.600 --> 0:46:52.680 about me when I'm walking up to them, dude, because 0:46:52.719 --> 0:46:56.160 they don't just do regular quacking noises. They go and 0:46:56.160 --> 0:46:58.040 they're looking at each other and they kind of look 0:46:58.080 --> 0:46:59.400 over at me, and they come back and they go 0:46:59.560 --> 0:47:02.080 and I open the door and then they stare at 0:47:02.080 --> 0:47:03.319 me for a second, like, what do you want me 0:47:03.400 --> 0:47:05.640 to do? Ducks? Do you want me to pick you 0:47:05.760 --> 0:47:08.239 up right now? Bro? No, go back down to the 0:47:08.239 --> 0:47:09.920 pond and I'll see you at five pm when the 0:47:09.920 --> 0:47:11.799 sun is setting in the winter time, and I'll bring 0:47:11.840 --> 0:47:13.480 you back up to the damn coop. But you know 0:47:13.560 --> 0:47:17.080 what helps me every single time. The comfort and the 0:47:17.160 --> 0:47:20.640 durability of Georgia boots is the only thing that does this. 0:47:20.880 --> 0:47:25.360 Maybe do this when they're going when they I want to, 0:47:25.840 --> 0:47:28.359 you know what I'm saying. But Georgia boot, the way 0:47:28.400 --> 0:47:30.040 it wraps around my foot, the way it makes me 0:47:30.080 --> 0:47:32.920 feel so comfortable, like I'm still inside. I might be 0:47:32.960 --> 0:47:34.839 cold up top and in the middle, but but down 0:47:34.920 --> 0:47:37.280 low by my little tosies, I'm feeling great because Georgia 0:47:37.320 --> 0:47:41.359 boot is not only durable, Liabel, but also comfortable. It's 0:47:41.400 --> 0:47:43.239 a win win. Head over to georgiaboot dot com and 0:47:43.320 --> 0:47:45.880 use code busting for twenty percent off. Would probably do 0:47:45.920 --> 0:47:49.560 tear talk. Oh sure, I forget we have tear talk. Yeah, 0:47:49.600 --> 0:47:51.000 and this is kind of a big one. Does this 0:47:51.040 --> 0:47:53.080 has been a huge argument of ours for a while. 0:47:53.160 --> 0:47:56.160 Oh yeah, this has been a fucking a big deal. 0:47:56.280 --> 0:47:57.759 Draw a line in the sandst where are you from? 0:47:57.840 --> 0:47:58.680 Born and raised. 0:48:00.000 --> 0:48:03.920 Saint Petersburg, Florida. Uh, raised in Tampa, Florida, guy, your 0:48:03.960 --> 0:48:06.440 Florida guy through and through La. Okay, so well he's 0:48:06.520 --> 0:48:07.040 West coast. 0:48:07.120 --> 0:48:09.440 Yeah, but he's from Florida, so he might have different views. 0:48:09.840 --> 0:48:12.400 So tier talk is the way the bus works is 0:48:12.400 --> 0:48:13.920 that we have tier one guys. Those are the dudes. 0:48:13.960 --> 0:48:16.480 They get like bust with the boys tattoos, which fucking 0:48:16.520 --> 0:48:18.440 if we were like, hey, drink this, drink it and 0:48:18.480 --> 0:48:21.440 die that, kuy. Those are the tier ones, Tier twos. 0:48:21.480 --> 0:48:23.480 They follow the comment, they like it, and so on 0:48:23.520 --> 0:48:25.680 and so forth. It just gets lower and lower, and 0:48:25.760 --> 0:48:29.359 our tier talk as we're rating today as burgers and 0:48:29.760 --> 0:48:33.680 Will and I really have a strong, a strong opinion 0:48:33.719 --> 0:48:35.279 of what is best and what is not. 0:48:35.680 --> 0:48:37.799 I would like to say that I feel like I 0:48:37.840 --> 0:48:40.840 have a fair opinion versus strong. 0:48:41.080 --> 0:48:42.080 Oh my god, what do we do? 0:48:42.280 --> 0:48:43.920 We both have fair opinions. I think yours is a 0:48:43.920 --> 0:48:49.000 little more prideful than mine. I disagree. This is okay. Now, 0:48:49.080 --> 0:48:51.279 you grew up on the West Coast. I grew up 0:48:51.320 --> 0:48:55.000 in Arizona of sacrament and I grew up in Arizona. 0:48:55.080 --> 0:48:57.080 And for context, I grew up in Missouri, so I 0:48:57.080 --> 0:48:59.399 didn't have the ones that were I mean, I guess 0:48:59.440 --> 0:49:02.760 we had five, guy, but we didn't have it near Bonter, Missouri. 0:49:02.840 --> 0:49:04.880 So here's what we need to do. Right now, you 0:49:04.880 --> 0:49:07.240 can put your tiers in. We're not going to comment 0:49:07.320 --> 0:49:09.480 on it because we can comment after. Well, we'll put 0:49:09.480 --> 0:49:11.880 all you'll do your first three tiers. You'll do your 0:49:11.880 --> 0:49:13.480 first three tiers, and I'll do my last and then 0:49:13.560 --> 0:49:15.040 and then we'll discuss. 0:49:14.719 --> 0:49:15.920 First three tiers meaning. 0:49:17.200 --> 0:49:20.240 Middle and then below that. So top three best burgers, 0:49:20.239 --> 0:49:22.440 and you're a pretty best burgers. Now we're gonna leave 0:49:22.480 --> 0:49:27.520 it alone. Yeah. No, I guess this is like a 0:49:27.560 --> 0:49:30.720 point of reference fast food burgers. 0:49:30.760 --> 0:49:30.960 Yeah. 0:49:30.960 --> 0:49:33.520 So, like, have you been to Jack Browns here in Nashville. No, 0:49:34.080 --> 0:49:35.120 it's an out standing burger. 0:49:35.160 --> 0:49:38.919 You love it, Like, uh, yes, it's not Nashville though. 0:49:38.880 --> 0:49:41.960 Right No, no, No, that's the gourmet burger. Yeah, thank you, boss. 0:49:41.960 --> 0:49:43.320 That's one of my favorite things in the world to 0:49:44.280 --> 0:49:47.600 go into McDonald's or a Burger King and give them 0:49:47.600 --> 0:49:49.560 two hundred bucks and just say surprise me. 0:49:50.200 --> 0:49:50.560 Really. 0:49:50.680 --> 0:49:52.440 Yeah, I do it all the time. I do it 0:49:52.440 --> 0:49:55.960 at del taco move. It's really fun when you're with 0:49:56.000 --> 0:49:57.200 a bunch of guys. When you were with a bunch 0:49:57.200 --> 0:49:58.680 of guys, we did it? Did we do it the 0:49:58.719 --> 0:49:59.160 other night? 0:50:00.000 --> 0:50:00.480 Where's Peter? 0:50:01.239 --> 0:50:04.320 Did we do it the other night? And Hugh babies, 0:50:06.239 --> 0:50:10.719 Uh the Peter? Where do we get burgers out the 0:50:10.719 --> 0:50:13.640 other night? Cookout? 0:50:14.120 --> 0:50:14.520 Cook it? 0:50:15.320 --> 0:50:17.239 We Well, we were drinking across the street at the 0:50:17.320 --> 0:50:19.839 Hunton and we went over there and the doors were 0:50:19.880 --> 0:50:22.279 locked and they were closed. They were just doing drive 0:50:22.320 --> 0:50:24.920 through and a guy recognized me. So we got in 0:50:24.920 --> 0:50:27.560 his car and we sat in the drive through line 0:50:28.000 --> 0:50:29.920 and I said, he said, what do you guys want 0:50:29.960 --> 0:50:32.480 to order? I said, let me handle this. I said, uh, 0:50:33.280 --> 0:50:36.000 I got a hundred bucks. Surprised me. And they gave 0:50:36.080 --> 0:50:39.879 us like twenty hot dogs, twenty burgers, some fries. They 0:50:39.920 --> 0:50:43.080 just loaded us up and then we got it. I said, 0:50:43.080 --> 0:50:44.840 pull it out, whatever you want. And then he just 0:50:44.840 --> 0:50:46.120 pulled it out and we got out of his car 0:50:46.160 --> 0:50:50.520 and we got an uber home and so taco, it's 0:50:50.560 --> 0:50:53.200 always great. Took going to make your tear list you. 0:50:53.360 --> 0:50:54.920 No no no no no no no no no no. 0:50:54.960 --> 0:50:56.680 I was saying, where your taste buds are at no 0:50:56.760 --> 0:50:58.279 so already throwing a little judgment at him. 0:50:58.280 --> 0:50:59.839 You got to be you're right on one of my 0:51:00.560 --> 0:51:02.120 one of my favorite things also to do on the 0:51:02.200 --> 0:51:05.520 road is snee seine snackers, which is we then take 0:51:05.640 --> 0:51:07.640 our leftovers, so we've we call it. 0:51:07.600 --> 0:51:08.200 Making it rain. 0:51:08.440 --> 0:51:13.480 We'll make it rain at white Castle, UH, Wendy's and McDonald's, 0:51:13.520 --> 0:51:16.319 and then we will take all our burgers and try 0:51:16.360 --> 0:51:18.600 to will each challenge each other to make the best 0:51:18.640 --> 0:51:20.160 burger with the leftovers we have. 0:51:20.680 --> 0:51:22.480 So we will take the. 0:51:22.320 --> 0:51:26.760 In and Out UH patties and order the White Castle 0:51:26.800 --> 0:51:29.719 patties and make a layer of that with the McDonald's 0:51:29.760 --> 0:51:33.160 cheeseburger all in the big mac bun, and present that 0:51:33.200 --> 0:51:35.440 to everyone. See what they think, and it's it's the 0:51:35.680 --> 0:51:38.400 funnest we have these challenges. Will everyone like do their 0:51:38.400 --> 0:51:40.879 best Frankenstein creation and then present it to the group. 0:51:40.920 --> 0:51:42.799 And we're like, oh, that fucking that's good. 0:51:42.880 --> 0:51:43.440 So it sounds like. 0:51:44.000 --> 0:51:47.399 He's good, You've done this, I've got I've got, I've 0:51:47.400 --> 0:51:48.520 got my take right now. 0:51:48.440 --> 0:51:51.200 Okay, let's go and no reactions, no reactions, voice, We 0:51:51.200 --> 0:51:52.080 just want to sit and eat it. 0:51:52.800 --> 0:51:54.839 Number one is in and Out. 0:51:55.040 --> 0:51:59.560 Number two is burger king, uh whopper with cheese, and 0:51:59.640 --> 0:52:04.400 number three this is the sleeper is the Carls Junior 0:52:04.440 --> 0:52:05.320 five dollars burger. 0:52:08.360 --> 0:52:13.560 Will, just don't react, just let it eat so he 0:52:13.719 --> 0:52:14.879 can repeat this one more time. 0:52:15.160 --> 0:52:18.960 Number one in and out double double animal style. Number 0:52:18.960 --> 0:52:21.720 two burger king whopper with cheese, preferably a double whopper 0:52:21.760 --> 0:52:22.320 with cheese. 0:52:23.200 --> 0:52:31.400 Number three Carl's Junior, the five dollars burger. Well, what 0:52:31.440 --> 0:52:31.759 do you do? 0:52:31.800 --> 0:52:33.279 You want my thoughts or you want me? Oh? I 0:52:33.320 --> 0:52:35.680 want and I don't want your thoughts on that? Okay? 0:52:36.520 --> 0:52:39.360 And Bert, please don't respond to Will when he's a start. 0:52:39.239 --> 0:52:45.960 Hears My number one is uh five guys cheese burger, lettuce, tomato, 0:52:46.280 --> 0:52:50.719 mayo onions, Bert. 0:52:50.480 --> 0:53:06.759 Please sorry, respect. My two is shakeshack. My three. I 0:53:06.800 --> 0:53:08.920 agree with Burt on the Carls Junior five dollars burger. 0:53:11.600 --> 0:53:14.200 I have the floor. You have the floor. My number 0:53:14.239 --> 0:53:18.319 one in and out double double is my number one. 0:53:18.360 --> 0:53:21.719 Figured you would dick grid with Burt. My number two 0:53:22.360 --> 0:53:25.760 remember when not I have the floor. My fall, number 0:53:25.760 --> 0:53:31.160 two fat burger, and number three. I'm going to stick 0:53:31.160 --> 0:53:32.960 with all of you at Carls Junior, but it's not 0:53:32.960 --> 0:53:35.120 gonna be the five dollar burger. It's going to be 0:53:35.400 --> 0:53:40.520 the double Western bacon cheeseburger. Those are my three. 0:53:40.600 --> 0:53:43.799 Okay, so first thing, first things first, well, first thing 0:53:43.880 --> 0:53:45.799 really stoock out and that's the fact that you chose 0:53:45.840 --> 0:53:47.719 in and out and five guys did not make your list. 0:53:47.880 --> 0:53:50.680 Well, I would like to say very pedestrian of you 0:53:50.719 --> 0:53:51.760 for your first two choices. 0:53:52.360 --> 0:53:56.280 Very pedestrian. Well, well, yeah, yeah, it means. 0:53:56.520 --> 0:53:59.440 It means I guess you have YELP on your phone. 0:54:00.000 --> 0:54:02.000 I guess whoa come on now, five guys? 0:54:05.840 --> 0:54:12.640 Five guys is what everyone says. Everyone says shake shack everyone. 0:54:13.160 --> 0:54:16.560 Everyone who doesn't want to step out of the crowd, 0:54:16.719 --> 0:54:19.439 not be a sheep and find the thing they love. 0:54:19.880 --> 0:54:22.880 They say that those shake shack. Do you remember the 0:54:22.920 --> 0:54:25.480 first time someone was like, but you've you had shakeshack? 0:54:25.680 --> 0:54:28.040 And I was like, yeah, oh, I see what they're doing. 0:54:28.200 --> 0:54:31.279 They're trying to do what everyone else has done. Oh 0:54:31.480 --> 0:54:32.719 have you had five guys? 0:54:33.040 --> 0:54:34.759 I think so? I think so? 0:54:35.000 --> 0:54:37.400 You mean the guys are doing what everyone else has done. 0:54:37.640 --> 0:54:44.120 Five guys is trying to do when Carls Junior, Carls 0:54:44.200 --> 0:54:47.480 Junior stood itself, out stood it so I bought a 0:54:47.520 --> 0:54:51.120 house because there was a Carls Junior behind it. 0:54:51.200 --> 0:54:53.719 Carls Junior Fox is so hard Fox. Well, I don't 0:54:53.760 --> 0:54:54.920 think we all disagree on the Carls. 0:54:55.239 --> 0:54:57.719 When I when I I had an audition for the 0:54:57.840 --> 0:55:01.040 five dollars burger to do commercial for the five dollar burger. 0:55:01.120 --> 0:55:03.280 They told me you'll be eating a five Carls Junior 0:55:03.280 --> 0:55:06.719 five dollar burger. Don't come in hungry. And I have 0:55:06.840 --> 0:55:09.600 never been more excited for an audition. I get there 0:55:09.600 --> 0:55:12.040 and the woman says, the audition's been canceled. And I said, 0:55:12.600 --> 0:55:14.120 but how about that five dollar burger. 0:55:14.200 --> 0:55:15.640 That's how much you love carl gun She. 0:55:15.560 --> 0:55:19.359 Said, I have one, and I said, can I have one? 0:55:19.520 --> 0:55:21.160 She goes, I have thirty of them, and I went, 0:55:21.719 --> 0:55:23.839 can I have all of them? She said, you can 0:55:23.920 --> 0:55:26.520 have all of them? And I took thirty five dollars 0:55:26.520 --> 0:55:29.160 burgers home. I ate one in the car, I ate one. 0:55:29.160 --> 0:55:31.320 When I got there, I ate one. I couldn't stop 0:55:31.320 --> 0:55:34.360 eating them. And then I called fifteen friends and said, 0:55:34.440 --> 0:55:36.480 who wants to have dinner at my house tonight? I'm 0:55:36.520 --> 0:55:39.759 making burgers right and then wrap them in ten foil. 0:55:39.840 --> 0:55:42.160 I put them in the oven. I warmed them up 0:55:42.360 --> 0:55:45.719 and I bring them out thinking I've made these burgers. 0:55:46.120 --> 0:55:48.319 If I had told them it's Carls Junior, they would 0:55:48.360 --> 0:55:52.040 have been like h I had experienced them because on 0:55:52.080 --> 0:55:54.560 the ride to Sacramento, Carls Junior is littered on the 0:55:54.600 --> 0:55:58.160 five and I loved this burger. I brought out five 0:55:58.200 --> 0:56:01.000 dollar burgers that they thought I fucking made, and they 0:56:01.000 --> 0:56:04.200 were like, this is the best goddamn burger I've ever 0:56:04.280 --> 0:56:04.919 fucking had. 0:56:04.960 --> 0:56:05.520 Oh shit. 0:56:06.000 --> 0:56:06.960 And I came out and. 0:56:06.880 --> 0:56:08.680 Those are the same people that say five guys is 0:56:08.719 --> 0:56:11.200 the best burger. Yep. Those the same fucking people that 0:56:11.239 --> 0:56:12.040 say five guys. 0:56:12.080 --> 0:56:16.160 So the problem I have, Number one, I find it 0:56:16.239 --> 0:56:18.920 respectful that you say everybody that that's the most popular 0:56:18.920 --> 0:56:20.320 opinion is five guys, because. 0:56:20.080 --> 0:56:21.720 I do agree that it is the best burger. 0:56:22.320 --> 0:56:26.600 And as somebody who you know is ecstatic anytime I 0:56:26.600 --> 0:56:29.040 get to trouble somewhere, what a burger that could be 0:56:29.120 --> 0:56:30.440 up there. But I had a bad experience the last 0:56:30.440 --> 0:56:32.120 time with wa burger down in Textas Shout out Texas. 0:56:32.200 --> 0:56:34.920 What Burger's washed a lot. 0:56:34.920 --> 0:56:36.839 There's a lot on this Okay, there's a lot of 0:56:37.480 --> 0:56:40.359 blonde haired, blue eyes women on this list, right That's 0:56:40.360 --> 0:56:43.200 That's my point is like Waterburger, blonde hair, blue eyes 0:56:43.200 --> 0:56:46.759 Shakeshack water blond hair, blue eyes shakeshack and and taking shake. 0:56:46.840 --> 0:56:49.560 I mean they should their cousins their cousins. Yeah, I 0:56:49.600 --> 0:56:51.960 mean Sonic. I don't even know why it's on the list. 0:56:52.760 --> 0:56:55.239 I don't think that Dairy Queen. What the fuck is 0:56:55.280 --> 0:56:56.040 dairy Queen doing on this? 0:56:56.239 --> 0:56:58.600 I think Derek Quin's a very underrated burger. I'll be honest. 0:56:58.840 --> 0:57:00.239 I'll tell you when we went. Did it? 0:57:00.239 --> 0:57:02.080 Because you know I love Blizzards? Yeah, no, I fucking 0:57:02.120 --> 0:57:03.960 love Blizzards. That's the best ice cream on the planet. 0:57:04.080 --> 0:57:07.160 Nothing can beat soft or of ice cream. But they're burgers. 0:57:07.200 --> 0:57:08.680 It was like all tomato, all mayo. 0:57:08.760 --> 0:57:08.960 It was. 0:57:09.120 --> 0:57:10.880 It was okay, So it wasn't what it needs to be. 0:57:11.000 --> 0:57:13.239 I mean I had one a few months ago and 0:57:13.280 --> 0:57:14.400 I thought it was pretty fantastic. 0:57:14.440 --> 0:57:16.680 But it be the establishment. The people are moving. You 0:57:16.680 --> 0:57:19.560 do got a white castle, beautiful redhead. Do I want 0:57:19.560 --> 0:57:21.440 to marry her? No, I just I want to have 0:57:21.480 --> 0:57:23.160 sex with her. I want to see puffing nipol. Sure, 0:57:23.280 --> 0:57:24.480 but I'm not gonna marry her. 0:57:24.520 --> 0:57:26.640 Castle is like a closet. You enjoy it. Every now 0:57:26.840 --> 0:57:29.000 I want to I have to disagree with both those students. 0:57:29.000 --> 0:57:32.760 I think I think White Castle's preposterous. Really, she's she's 0:57:32.800 --> 0:57:34.520 a haggard woman I see in the street with her 0:57:34.840 --> 0:57:36.760 worst spaghetti strap shoulder. 0:57:36.840 --> 0:57:40.600 She focks hard, fucks hard without a condom. 0:57:42.000 --> 0:57:44.640 Naughty stuff to that girl. Bro that crave case with 0:57:44.720 --> 0:57:47.160 a suitcase, that's nice. 0:57:47.280 --> 0:57:49.760 That's one of my best moves in fucking Just grab 0:57:49.800 --> 0:57:53.000 a case, just come in and just light them up. 0:57:53.120 --> 0:57:59.040 I mean, like Domino's falling in my mouth. But like, 0:57:59.360 --> 0:58:00.840 but like I said, you're right, it's not I don't 0:58:00.840 --> 0:58:01.400 want to live there. 0:58:01.440 --> 0:58:02.840 No, you don't want to You don't want to live there. 0:58:02.840 --> 0:58:04.280 You're not gonna go. What do you guys want for dinner? 0:58:04.280 --> 0:58:04.720 White Castle? 0:58:04.720 --> 0:58:07.840 Everyone's like, what did da do? Coke this afternoon? Are 0:58:07.880 --> 0:58:09.040 you getting white Castle for ye? 0:58:09.120 --> 0:58:12.400 I would love this afternoon where you leave Nashville hit 0:58:12.520 --> 0:58:15.880 up Hugh Babies. It's not nationally It would have been 0:58:15.920 --> 0:58:18.000 on my list, but I think hugh Baby's is really. 0:58:17.760 --> 0:58:20.360 Big Mac is way too much. So what what you 0:58:20.360 --> 0:58:22.200 can do with McDonald's is you can do special orders. 0:58:22.440 --> 0:58:25.440 They do a big Mac with the quarter pounder patty, 0:58:25.640 --> 0:58:28.919 which is so much more ratio to bun to burger. Yeah, 0:58:29.040 --> 0:58:30.720 the way they do it now, it's a great burger. 0:58:31.160 --> 0:58:33.840 Our dog is my daughter's fucking We bought a dog 0:58:34.120 --> 0:58:36.160 in Arizona and on the right home they'd never had 0:58:36.160 --> 0:58:39.600 a big Mac and we they had a big Mac 0:58:39.640 --> 0:58:41.920 and they're like, these are amazing, and I was like, yeah, everyone, 0:58:42.200 --> 0:58:44.520 it's it's a big maccause everyone likes them. Yeah, and 0:58:44.560 --> 0:58:46.480 they go, we should name our dog big Mac. I went, no, 0:58:46.560 --> 0:58:48.640 we're not doing that. Now we have a dog named 0:58:48.680 --> 0:58:50.840 big Mac. Yeah fucking Mac. 0:58:51.000 --> 0:58:52.400 So tell me why tee me on the journey of 0:58:52.400 --> 0:58:54.240 why he shows in and Out Burger? Why did you 0:58:54.240 --> 0:58:56.000 show I get to speak. 0:58:55.760 --> 0:58:57.920 On I think you've spoke No, no, no, no, bird 0:58:58.000 --> 0:59:00.560 poked the whole time, called me a bit estuary, and 0:59:00.560 --> 0:59:02.800 then he's went on like stories, he's done comedy hour 0:59:02.880 --> 0:59:03.440 on burgers. 0:59:03.520 --> 0:59:06.200 Okay, go ahead, we know he has a dog named 0:59:06.200 --> 0:59:06.520 big Mac. 0:59:07.600 --> 0:59:08.600 What do you have to say this? 0:59:09.560 --> 0:59:15.960 Because In and Out is over fucking rated. It's my 0:59:16.080 --> 0:59:18.480 turn to talk. So when I went when I went 0:59:18.480 --> 0:59:20.959 out to Oakland, was ecstatic to get in and Out Burger. 0:59:20.960 --> 0:59:22.400 After games got it, loved it. 0:59:23.640 --> 0:59:25.919 Either way, we're in and Out Burger, Like I think 0:59:25.960 --> 0:59:27.880 In and Out Burger is a good burger. Do not 0:59:27.920 --> 0:59:30.120 get it twisted. I do think it is a good burger. 0:59:30.160 --> 0:59:31.919 It is not great to me. It is a Chick 0:59:31.960 --> 0:59:35.720 fil A of burgers, very great customer service, phenomenal experience. 0:59:35.760 --> 0:59:37.320 When you go and you have an in and out, 0:59:37.440 --> 0:59:38.920 you want to go hit an in and out burger. 0:59:39.000 --> 0:59:40.880 When I went to my boys' wedding last year, I 0:59:40.920 --> 0:59:43.480 was in his wedding, I could not wait to fucking 0:59:43.480 --> 0:59:45.200 get a burger. Not only that, I couldn't wait to 0:59:45.200 --> 0:59:47.919 get high around the fire, starved myself. 0:59:47.640 --> 0:59:48.880 Until we went to go get the burger. 0:59:49.080 --> 0:59:51.240 Went to one in and out, way too crowded, way 0:59:51.240 --> 0:59:52.480 too much traffic there, but I loved it. 0:59:52.520 --> 0:59:53.480 I couldn't wait. Baby. 0:59:53.520 --> 0:59:55.400 We got to go to another one, because this is 0:59:55.440 --> 0:59:57.440 the hype of fucking in and out burger. We go 0:59:57.520 --> 0:59:59.439 to another in and out burger, go to that one 0:59:59.440 --> 1:00:01.360 waiting line and again it's like Chick fil a. They 1:00:01.360 --> 1:00:03.920 got workers everywhere working and you're not gonna find a 1:00:03.960 --> 1:00:06.600 backup drive through like you do it in and out. 1:00:06.640 --> 1:00:09.240 I will give you that, it is extremely popular out there. 1:00:09.320 --> 1:00:11.800 But again back to my overrated talk. I get the 1:00:11.800 --> 1:00:14.240 double double, I have animal style with the fries. You 1:00:14.240 --> 1:00:17.360 gotta eat the fries quick because they get a little soggy. Okay, yeah, 1:00:17.520 --> 1:00:20.320 order it extra crispy. Okay, cool, everybody can get for 1:00:20.400 --> 1:00:23.520 crispy fries. But you get the in and out burger, 1:00:23.840 --> 1:00:26.960 and it is I am fucking high, bro, and I 1:00:27.000 --> 1:00:27.560 can't wait. 1:00:27.840 --> 1:00:31.200 My mouth is salivating. I bite into the burger learn 1:00:31.200 --> 1:00:31.560 and think. 1:00:31.480 --> 1:00:37.200 To myself, hey, and now I go back to I'm 1:00:37.200 --> 1:00:39.560 not gonna astro yet. And then I take another bite 1:00:39.600 --> 1:00:42.600 of the burger and I'm thinking, Yo, this isn't what 1:00:42.840 --> 1:00:45.000 I've built up. Like I've been in Oakland. I couldn't 1:00:45.000 --> 1:00:46.520 wait to tell the boys. I try it in and out. Yeah, 1:00:46.520 --> 1:00:48.480 it's the best fucking burger in the world. But the 1:00:48.560 --> 1:00:51.760 consistency of the bun it ends up breaking. It doesn't 1:00:52.000 --> 1:00:56.880 not mush in a disgusting way, but it doesn't down 1:00:56.920 --> 1:01:02.520 into the ingredients. Again, top notch quality presentation. It looks 1:01:02.560 --> 1:01:06.040 deceivingly good, but you bite down and the bread breaks 1:01:06.080 --> 1:01:08.280 before it really gets to the ingredients. And it is 1:01:08.360 --> 1:01:12.280 an over hyped burger. Yes quality they you know they 1:01:12.520 --> 1:01:15.680 get their ingredients within fifty miles of a fucking farm. 1:01:16.040 --> 1:01:18.080 Whatever it is, that's awesome. But I think it is 1:01:18.120 --> 1:01:21.360 the most overrated burger out there. I think it is good, 1:01:21.480 --> 1:01:23.840 not great. Don't get it fucking twisted in and Out 1:01:23.880 --> 1:01:26.280 Burger is good, but it is not great to me 1:01:26.440 --> 1:01:29.240 five guys like dude, every time I have it, I'm 1:01:29.320 --> 1:01:32.600 just like, fuck and and mind you, I do feel 1:01:32.640 --> 1:01:36.000 like I took a pedestrian, say with Shakeshack when I 1:01:36.000 --> 1:01:38.160 see it. All the pictures on there, but Shakeshak changed 1:01:38.200 --> 1:01:39.280 my life a little bit when I was out in 1:01:39.320 --> 1:01:40.520 DC and I tried it and I was drunk. For 1:01:40.520 --> 1:01:42.240 the first time, I had the peppers on it. The 1:01:42.320 --> 1:01:45.440 cherry peppers was phenomenal. But one night I ordered because. 1:01:45.200 --> 1:01:46.840 I'm like, you know, I'm telling Charlie like I gotta 1:01:46.880 --> 1:01:48.040 figure out by the way. 1:01:48.040 --> 1:01:49.560 I looked at Charles, said, hey, babe, what do you 1:01:49.600 --> 1:01:51.240 think of this in and out bur She's like, you know, 1:01:51.320 --> 1:01:53.360 it's not as good as what you're sitting You've been 1:01:53.440 --> 1:01:56.040 hyping it up. And I was like, I fucking agree, bro, 1:01:56.200 --> 1:01:57.640 And I'm h you know, I'm high. And then I 1:01:57.640 --> 1:01:58.880 go back to eating the rest of the burger. 1:01:59.040 --> 1:02:01.480 I eat it all, but it just wasn't what I 1:02:01.520 --> 1:02:02.320 thought it was gonna be. 1:02:02.680 --> 1:02:04.960 Now we go to uh, We're back in Nashville, and 1:02:05.000 --> 1:02:07.120 I'm like, hey, babe, got like I'm on a I 1:02:07.120 --> 1:02:10.400 gotta figure out, Like, I gotta find my taste with burgers, 1:02:10.400 --> 1:02:11.840 just like I want to do with whiskey, because I 1:02:11.880 --> 1:02:12.360 like whiskey. 1:02:13.200 --> 1:02:14.640 And you know how you kind of like like whiskey 1:02:14.640 --> 1:02:15.640 and you're just in circles and. 1:02:15.640 --> 1:02:17.680 You're like, oh, yeah, I dabbling whiskey, and guys are like, 1:02:17.680 --> 1:02:19.320 oh this whiskey, that whiskey, And I'm like, I gotta 1:02:19.320 --> 1:02:20.280 find my taste with whiskey. 1:02:20.280 --> 1:02:22.920 Same with burgers. So I get I go and get 1:02:22.920 --> 1:02:23.800 a five guys burger. 1:02:23.840 --> 1:02:25.200 I go and get a shake Shack burger, and I 1:02:25.240 --> 1:02:27.240 have them fucking side by side, and I take my 1:02:27.320 --> 1:02:31.360 bites and Shakeshack tastes way more manufacturer than a five 1:02:31.360 --> 1:02:32.120 guys burger. 1:02:32.320 --> 1:02:35.960 Five Guys legitimately is the best tasting burger. 1:02:36.000 --> 1:02:38.400 Yeah, it might cost a lot, but hey, fucking make 1:02:38.440 --> 1:02:40.800 a little bit more money, spend a little bit more 1:02:40.800 --> 1:02:42.520 on a burger if you want to have a great. 1:02:42.400 --> 1:02:43.800 Yeah, you want to treat yourself. 1:02:43.960 --> 1:02:45.720 But that is why I think five Guys is the 1:02:45.760 --> 1:02:48.000 best again, I think in and Out is good. I 1:02:48.040 --> 1:02:49.840 do not think it is great, and I for damn 1:02:49.840 --> 1:02:50.840 sure do not think it's e lak. 1:02:51.000 --> 1:02:53.080 I will tell you this, that was a very That 1:02:53.160 --> 1:02:55.600 was a very wealth thought out wealth. 1:02:56.400 --> 1:02:58.240 Yeah, you were ready. I thought about it a while 1:02:59.000 --> 1:03:00.280 and I tell you where. I tell you where. 1:03:00.280 --> 1:03:02.440 You started to sway me and I can't believe I'm 1:03:02.440 --> 1:03:02.960 gonna say that. 1:03:03.000 --> 1:03:06.200 I no, here's fucked up. As you started, he started going, well. 1:03:06.120 --> 1:03:07.560 You know what it is as soon as he said, 1:03:08.000 --> 1:03:10.120 you get to the line. And then I started thinking, 1:03:10.160 --> 1:03:12.640 if we're making these women right, because that's how you 1:03:12.800 --> 1:03:14.320 everything's gonna translate into women? 1:03:16.120 --> 1:03:16.640 Do I mean? 1:03:16.680 --> 1:03:19.200 Do I want to marry the chick that spends an 1:03:19.240 --> 1:03:22.120 hour on makeup and is a model and is gonna 1:03:22.120 --> 1:03:23.880 be a little difficult in this relationship? 1:03:23.960 --> 1:03:25.280 Because that is in and out is. 1:03:25.680 --> 1:03:28.680 It's the lines through the fucking roof, and it's you 1:03:28.760 --> 1:03:30.320 think you're in a turn lane and you're like, did 1:03:30.320 --> 1:03:32.439 I accidentally get in the line for in and out? 1:03:32.720 --> 1:03:34.680 And then you're like the accessibility of in and out, 1:03:35.400 --> 1:03:38.640 which obviously speaks how great the burger is, but you go, 1:03:38.760 --> 1:03:40.960 but you started talking to me about accessibility and I go. 1:03:41.480 --> 1:03:43.600 I hate to say this is a lot of times I. 1:03:43.560 --> 1:03:46.000 Don't get in and out because getting in and out 1:03:46.080 --> 1:03:49.520 is such a fucking hassle, Like getting in and out 1:03:49.640 --> 1:03:54.360 is so difficult that you gotta be you gotta you 1:03:54.400 --> 1:03:56.920 actually got to be not hungry to want to get 1:03:56.920 --> 1:03:59.200 in and out, because you're gonna get if you get 1:03:59.200 --> 1:04:02.200 into that line hungry, you end up wondering fucking five burgers. 1:04:02.280 --> 1:04:04.440 Okay, I disagree with everything you just said. Here's why 1:04:04.640 --> 1:04:07.000 when you're talking about if we're gonna shape these beautiful 1:04:07.000 --> 1:04:10.440 burgers into beautiful women, the reason why it's the in 1:04:10.480 --> 1:04:12.479 and out burger is so solid after is because she's 1:04:13.080 --> 1:04:15.160 far and few between. There's not a lot of other 1:04:15.200 --> 1:04:17.000 women out there. You can go anywhere and find that 1:04:17.040 --> 1:04:21.240 five guys, blonde hair, blue eyes, small waist, fat ass, 1:04:21.360 --> 1:04:27.360 and but probably to talk to you though over and 1:04:27.440 --> 1:04:28.120 over and. 1:04:28.120 --> 1:04:31.080 Says and says the same, that's so lit. 1:04:31.480 --> 1:04:33.080 Yeah, Yeah, that's a vibe. 1:04:33.120 --> 1:04:33.880 That's a vibe. 1:04:33.880 --> 1:04:36.000 That's a vibe put on Put that on Instagram, and 1:04:36.040 --> 1:04:42.360 you're like, again, really good sealing your own personality now, 1:04:42.480 --> 1:04:44.240 in and out. The way it goes is, look, there's 1:04:44.280 --> 1:04:45.800 way less in and out Burgers out there in the 1:04:45.880 --> 1:04:48.600 United States of America, and there are five guys just 1:04:48.800 --> 1:04:51.959 like women. There's so many the phrase, what's the phrase? 1:04:52.080 --> 1:04:54.480 So many fish in the sea, But there's the In 1:04:54.520 --> 1:04:57.160 and Out Burger is the rare, the one you want 1:04:57.200 --> 1:04:59.480 to Everybody wants it, but can you get it? And 1:04:59.520 --> 1:05:02.760 if you're a able to achieve getting her to go 1:05:02.880 --> 1:05:05.480 with you, you know, not only do you have to 1:05:05.520 --> 1:05:08.400 make yourself better as a man to compete with her 1:05:08.680 --> 1:05:11.160 and being like moving towards the trajectory of wife. You 1:05:11.160 --> 1:05:14.400 guys want to create together or do you realize, Hey, 1:05:14.400 --> 1:05:15.840 I'm going where I'm at right now. I'll just go 1:05:15.840 --> 1:05:17.600 with this five guys. Now listen. If you want to 1:05:17.600 --> 1:05:19.360 talk about models who put all this stuff on their 1:05:19.360 --> 1:05:21.520 face and everything like that, you got to five guys, 1:05:21.840 --> 1:05:24.960 what do you have? Every single condiment, every single topping, 1:05:25.280 --> 1:05:28.040 every single cheese. You can choose anything you want. But 1:05:28.120 --> 1:05:30.400 if you go to In and Out Burger, here's the deal. 1:05:30.680 --> 1:05:34.160 It's simple. It's sweet, but it's organic, it's delicious, and 1:05:34.200 --> 1:05:37.400 it's fresh. And for those who know it, who have 1:05:37.440 --> 1:05:39.160 spent enough time with her or went to summer camp 1:05:39.200 --> 1:05:40.760 with her, maybe you felt her up when you guys 1:05:40.760 --> 1:05:42.320 are in the seventh grade, right, you know what I'm 1:05:42.360 --> 1:05:45.560 talking about. And she comes to you and she goes, Hey, 1:05:45.560 --> 1:05:47.520 in case you're wondering, I do have fries that are 1:05:47.560 --> 1:05:49.560 well done if you want them. You know what I'm saying. 1:05:49.720 --> 1:05:51.600 And hey, you like your onions growth. There's a thing 1:05:51.640 --> 1:05:53.560 called animal style. Hey, you're trying to watch your way 1:05:53.600 --> 1:05:54.760 a little bit, don't worry. I'll help you out. This 1:05:54.800 --> 1:05:56.720 is a thing called protein style. Cut the carbs a 1:05:56.760 --> 1:05:58.440 little bit, everybody. I'm not going to show you that. 1:05:58.680 --> 1:06:00.280 But I'm not going to show you that. 1:06:00.880 --> 1:06:02.919 I'm not going to show you that Nick Who's dad 1:06:02.960 --> 1:06:06.640 taught her how to change a tire exactly exactly. 1:06:06.680 --> 1:06:08.960 There was a girl at Michigan. I don't remember her name, 1:06:08.960 --> 1:06:11.680 but I remember we sat down and she was She's 1:06:11.720 --> 1:06:13.520 a really good looking girl. And we all go to 1:06:13.560 --> 1:06:15.840 eat and a couple of the girls order like, you know, 1:06:15.880 --> 1:06:17.800 fruit food, drinks whatever. She has. Let me get a 1:06:17.840 --> 1:06:21.440 cheeseburger and a Miller Lite place and she slams the 1:06:21.440 --> 1:06:23.000 thing down eight send me and the boys are like, 1:06:23.040 --> 1:06:26.080 who the fuck is this girl? We all loved her, right, 1:06:26.400 --> 1:06:28.320 I have no idea what she's doing in this world. Now, 1:06:28.400 --> 1:06:30.280 I have no idea. I wasn't prepared. I wasn't ready 1:06:30.280 --> 1:06:32.160 for a woman like that. Where is that once? I 1:06:32.160 --> 1:06:34.360 need the app to find those women? Right, you have 1:06:34.480 --> 1:06:36.400 the app and it's in the West Coast and her 1:06:36.480 --> 1:06:39.800 name's in and Out? All right? Now, are you back 1:06:42.760 --> 1:06:46.040 my cousin videos? Hang on? Hang on, hang on? 1:06:46.480 --> 1:06:49.880 I will say, just like I explained, what happens. There 1:06:50.320 --> 1:06:53.880 is this you get outside of the actual fucking burger, 1:06:54.040 --> 1:06:57.400 and it's bells and whistles and fucking storytelling about chicks. 1:06:57.400 --> 1:07:00.320 And you're selling stories. You're not selling the burger. When 1:07:00.320 --> 1:07:03.160 I talked, it was about fucking ingredients. It was about 1:07:03.200 --> 1:07:05.520 how I bit through the burger and how that's what 1:07:05.640 --> 1:07:07.480 swayed my mind. You got you start getting into the 1:07:07.520 --> 1:07:10.280 girl conversations, start getting that you're a phenomenal storyteller. You're 1:07:10.360 --> 1:07:12.880 exactly what an in and Out is. You're a great experience. 1:07:12.920 --> 1:07:15.320 You're a great experience. You're you're entertainingble I lack though. 1:07:15.400 --> 1:07:18.800 It's the quality of the taste of the burger is 1:07:18.840 --> 1:07:21.400 not there. What's the quality that's not good? Men? Great, 1:07:22.040 --> 1:07:24.360 you're good, You're not great. Here's what I'll say, about it. 1:07:24.360 --> 1:07:26.080 If you want to go into the ingredients, let's undress 1:07:26.200 --> 1:07:28.600 not one thing about the burger about because I bought 1:07:28.600 --> 1:07:33.600 it a burger. I bought it to the woman. I 1:07:33.640 --> 1:07:37.760 will tell you this when you go to in and out, Yes, 1:07:37.880 --> 1:07:39.800 after you get through the fluff, after you get past 1:07:39.800 --> 1:07:43.240 the red fucking rope and you walk in and you 1:07:43.280 --> 1:07:45.600 see all the bells and whistles, the DJ is going heavy. 1:07:45.680 --> 1:07:47.240 You got a couple of girls grinding their teeth, and 1:07:47.240 --> 1:07:49.000 you go over and you want to undress this lady 1:07:49.040 --> 1:07:52.000 the way you want to see her now, only the bun. 1:07:52.160 --> 1:07:53.560 When you take it and you say, hey, let me 1:07:53.560 --> 1:07:55.680 get that devil double. They're gonna take the buns. They 1:07:55.720 --> 1:07:57.040 look at them like this and go, what do I 1:07:57.040 --> 1:07:58.560 do with this? I'm gonna put it on top of 1:07:58.600 --> 1:08:00.120 the stove because I want a little bit of to 1:08:00.160 --> 1:08:02.000 do it when you bite it in there, because texture 1:08:02.080 --> 1:08:04.760 is everything. You look at the ice breaks, what's up? 1:08:06.000 --> 1:08:07.680 It really doesn't. I've never had a bun break. 1:08:07.720 --> 1:08:11.760 I never because anytime I go, you're like, You're like, 1:08:11.960 --> 1:08:12.760 you're like a fucking bird. 1:08:12.800 --> 1:08:14.720 You get the lettuce ones. Yeah, sorry, it takes a 1:08:14.720 --> 1:08:16.320 lot to lose this average will I'm doing the best 1:08:16.360 --> 1:08:18.920 I can. Okay, we're talking quality now. When I go 1:08:19.080 --> 1:08:20.640 there and I get the bun, I bite it into it. 1:08:20.680 --> 1:08:22.320 I've never had an issue with that. I'm sorry that 1:08:22.400 --> 1:08:24.320 was your experience. But for me, she's always treated me 1:08:24.400 --> 1:08:27.519 right well and respectful, and she's always always called me 1:08:27.600 --> 1:08:31.200 back the iceberg lettuce once again, Is there any nutritional 1:08:31.280 --> 1:08:33.360 value the iceberg lettuce? Will I'll give you that answer. No, 1:08:33.439 --> 1:08:36.559 it's like celery. But texture is what you're looking for. 1:08:36.800 --> 1:08:39.840 It's crisp, it's dark green to a lighter green, making 1:08:39.840 --> 1:08:42.960 sure when you bite in, especially in that middle you 1:08:43.840 --> 1:08:47.760 when you bite into it, you know, for unbelievable you 1:08:47.760 --> 1:08:48.240 can get. 1:08:48.120 --> 1:08:52.120 That crunch starving. I'm hungry right now. 1:08:54.000 --> 1:08:54.200 Bad. 1:08:54.400 --> 1:08:55.559 Here's mass watering. 1:08:55.880 --> 1:08:59.240 Here's what I will say is the thing that people 1:08:59.280 --> 1:09:01.120 will argue again in and out burger. But I don't 1:09:01.120 --> 1:09:03.320 think it's an issue the size of the meat, the 1:09:03.320 --> 1:09:05.560 size of the patty, because you can always do the 1:09:05.600 --> 1:09:07.800 double double, the triple, triple, the four by four. You 1:09:07.800 --> 1:09:09.519 can do whatever you want. I guess the triple is 1:09:09.520 --> 1:09:12.960 fucking insane. Okay, that's an opinion, right, and we all 1:09:13.000 --> 1:09:14.640 have them saying like I'm not saying that against you. 1:09:14.640 --> 1:09:16.920 I'm just speaking to everybody. I I hear you, I 1:09:17.000 --> 1:09:21.439 hear you, millions of viewers, viewers, I get it. But 1:09:21.520 --> 1:09:23.800 I'm saying that the meat is a little bit, but 1:09:24.040 --> 1:09:27.000 it's not overwhelming. The cheese it's perfectly placed on top. 1:09:27.080 --> 1:09:29.680 The ratio is amazing. And I have never had the 1:09:29.680 --> 1:09:31.720 bun break on me in my entire life. I love 1:09:31.720 --> 1:09:33.599 the idea that you can get pickles, even though pickles 1:09:33.600 --> 1:09:35.400 don't come on it. You can have the onions raw 1:09:35.439 --> 1:09:38.120 if you want it. There's enough choices that you can 1:09:38.200 --> 1:09:40.760 have to where it's like, Okay, I have a little 1:09:40.760 --> 1:09:42.960 bit of freedom here, but it's not so many choices. 1:09:43.000 --> 1:09:45.439 We are like, give me the give me the barbecue sauce, 1:09:45.520 --> 1:09:47.120 give me the ketchup, give me this, give me that, 1:09:47.120 --> 1:09:48.200 And then all of a sudden youre eating. You're like, 1:09:48.240 --> 1:09:50.000 what the fuck am I eating? Is just like a 1:09:50.000 --> 1:09:52.080 weird stew with some meat in it, you know what 1:09:52.080 --> 1:09:52.479 I'm saying. 1:09:52.520 --> 1:09:54.559 So many secrets they have that you don't know, Like 1:09:54.600 --> 1:09:57.000 did you know that before in and out grills a 1:09:57.040 --> 1:09:59.880 burger they rub mustard all over it? I did not know, 1:10:00.200 --> 1:10:03.639 and that is why it has the crispiness to it. 1:10:03.800 --> 1:10:05.880 That's why it has that extra flavor to it. 1:10:06.120 --> 1:10:11.920 Fucking slap me in the arm like that, dude, Hey listen, 1:10:11.960 --> 1:10:14.080 and it's so great. I knew this would go because 1:10:14.080 --> 1:10:15.200 we talked. We were on the test. Hey, what are 1:10:15.200 --> 1:10:17.879 we to do? Botaie? What's your talking? I believe someone said burgers. 1:10:18.320 --> 1:10:19.280 I don't remember who said it. 1:10:19.720 --> 1:10:21.960 Jack. I had a viral moment because I eat my 1:10:22.840 --> 1:10:26.439 McDonald's cheeseburgers. I taco them, and everyone was like, what 1:10:26.560 --> 1:10:29.080 the fuck's that? I take the bottom bun off, flip 1:10:29.120 --> 1:10:31.080 it up, all the good ships on top, pickles, let 1:10:31.120 --> 1:10:34.800 us tomato or pickles, ketchup mustard and cheese, and I 1:10:34.840 --> 1:10:38.439 taco them. It's half the calories. And they were like, whoa, 1:10:38.479 --> 1:10:40.280 what else do you do? And I was like, I 1:10:40.600 --> 1:10:41.680 have I have a sport. 1:10:41.800 --> 1:10:43.320 What else do you do? 1:10:43.400 --> 1:10:45.679 I have a bunch. And so then everyone started hitting 1:10:45.720 --> 1:10:47.559 me up. Oh you know what I do? I get 1:10:47.600 --> 1:10:53.080 the mcfucking or something mcgang bang Yeah, And so they 1:10:53.080 --> 1:10:55.719 were like, all these orders you can get at McDonald's 1:10:55.720 --> 1:10:58.200 and the McDonald's I think hit us up and they're like, O, hey, 1:10:58.280 --> 1:10:59.960 don't do this. We don't want to make things compil, 1:11:00.439 --> 1:11:02.760 like order what's on our fucking menu? To I was like, 1:11:03.760 --> 1:11:06.840 but yeah, the I wanted I need to eat a 1:11:06.840 --> 1:11:07.519 burger now. 1:11:07.560 --> 1:11:09.280 When I would also threw me up a little. I 1:11:09.320 --> 1:11:11.320 was I thought you'd like fat burger. I thought you'd 1:11:11.320 --> 1:11:12.360 be into fat burger. 1:11:12.439 --> 1:11:14.960 I ever had in La was a fat burger, and 1:11:14.960 --> 1:11:17.160 it's the first time I ever had an egg on 1:11:17.200 --> 1:11:22.120 a burger. And they fucked me up so big that 1:11:22.240 --> 1:11:23.440 I only fucked. 1:11:23.200 --> 1:11:23.880 With fat burger. 1:11:24.000 --> 1:11:26.080 Okay, there was a fat burger on the quarter I 1:11:26.120 --> 1:11:27.559 lived at the Universal Sheridan. 1:11:27.640 --> 1:11:30.360 There was a corner house fat burger too, and there 1:11:30.400 --> 1:11:31.080 was a there was a. 1:11:31.040 --> 1:11:33.160 Fat burger and a poquito moss and they have great, 1:11:33.240 --> 1:11:33.959 great milkshakes. 1:11:33.960 --> 1:11:36.400 I know you never had fat burger. I think is unbelievable. 1:11:36.400 --> 1:11:39.760 Wait, fat burger fucking awesome. Yeah, but I didn't see 1:11:39.760 --> 1:11:41.240 fatburger on the list to be I was with you. 1:11:41.280 --> 1:11:42.920 Yeah, but didn't kind of like you didn't have to. 1:11:42.920 --> 1:11:44.280 That's what to me. I kind of feel like I 1:11:44.320 --> 1:11:45.760 fucked up on the shakescheck because I thought it was 1:11:45.800 --> 1:11:47.640 better than the ones that were. None always talked do 1:11:47.640 --> 1:11:49.439 you want to re rate? Wait? How come no? 1:11:49.439 --> 1:11:52.080 One's going to talk about how great, how much better 1:11:52.240 --> 1:11:55.000 a whopper with cheese is than a big mac, Like, 1:11:55.560 --> 1:11:56.759 I see, I haven't. 1:11:56.640 --> 1:11:58.680 Had it so long, I haven't read long to. 1:11:58.760 --> 1:12:01.920 Do that twelve hundred calories? Who is the whopper which 1:12:02.000 --> 1:12:03.280 used is twelve? 1:12:03.280 --> 1:12:05.920 Well that's a big girl. That's a fucking sounds good. 1:12:05.960 --> 1:12:07.960 But it's like like one of my boys, Derrick Henry, 1:12:08.160 --> 1:12:10.599 was talking about Windy's being so good, and I went 1:12:10.640 --> 1:12:12.559 there right after practice, right after the locker room. 1:12:12.560 --> 1:12:15.599 Fucking went there and it was like, dude, what are 1:12:15.640 --> 1:12:16.000 we doing. 1:12:16.040 --> 1:12:18.920 We're at a fast food, a legit fast food burger joint. 1:12:18.960 --> 1:12:21.960 We were at McDonald's in Arizona. What was that February? Yeah, 1:12:22.040 --> 1:12:24.200 and we walked in there. First off, the mcflury is 1:12:24.240 --> 1:12:26.800 they come in one size and thimble and then the 1:12:27.040 --> 1:12:30.719 monopoly Oh so small made will real real. 1:12:30.640 --> 1:12:34.280 Fucking in the pocket. Dude, you literally could so pissed 1:12:34.560 --> 1:12:36.840 large mcflury. And they come out with this little dink 1:12:36.920 --> 1:12:40.519 ass fucking yeah one size, Like. 1:12:41.120 --> 1:12:44.080 All right, give me the size, give me that one size, 1:12:44.240 --> 1:12:46.080 we'll get Superman. He gets so many He's like, this 1:12:46.120 --> 1:12:48.320 isn't enough of a tasty treat for me we need 1:12:48.360 --> 1:12:50.240 to go somewhere else. What's down the road to Sonic. 1:12:50.800 --> 1:12:54.240 We go to Sonic. I I was driving a pickup 1:12:54.240 --> 1:12:57.160 truck over there, real wide vehicle, and I go to 1:12:57.200 --> 1:13:00.759 pull in totally just fucking cash side of the vehicle, 1:13:00.920 --> 1:13:04.400 trying to get the percent. And we're getting Sonic selling 1:13:04.479 --> 1:13:08.519 foot long Glizzies. That's unbelievable, which I know is a 1:13:08.600 --> 1:13:10.880 JP thing. He loves the hot dogs. He loves hot dogs. 1:13:10.880 --> 1:13:11.519 But I love that. 1:13:11.680 --> 1:13:11.920 Dude. 1:13:11.920 --> 1:13:13.160 I fuck up hot dogs? 1:13:13.200 --> 1:13:13.800 Do you really? 1:13:14.000 --> 1:13:18.599 I fuck up hot I'm four percent like a homophobic adult. 1:13:18.640 --> 1:13:20.760 There's nothing like sexual things that really bothered me. On 1:13:20.800 --> 1:13:22.120 my knees. You can hold the back of my head, 1:13:22.920 --> 1:13:24.559 there is. 1:13:24.560 --> 1:13:27.080 On my face. That's almost I love him, really, dude. 1:13:27.280 --> 1:13:29.360 I have not been through the Chicago airport in my 1:13:29.479 --> 1:13:31.120 life without getting a Chicago hot dog. 1:13:31.240 --> 1:13:31.559 Really. 1:13:31.720 --> 1:13:33.400 Second I get off the plane, I find the first 1:13:33.479 --> 1:13:34.760 Chicago hot dog murder. 1:13:34.800 --> 1:13:35.160 Two of them. 1:13:35.520 --> 1:13:37.719 The one in Chicago's the green that has green billboard 1:13:37.720 --> 1:13:38.280 on it. Green. 1:13:38.439 --> 1:13:40.040 It's got the green building you. 1:13:40.160 --> 1:13:41.920 No, no, no, The one in uh in the airport 1:13:42.000 --> 1:13:47.000 in Chicago, Tony Island. No code is AH is Michigan, right, 1:13:47.200 --> 1:13:48.320 that's Detroit. 1:13:48.240 --> 1:13:50.120 Dude, I fuck up hot dogs. 1:13:50.479 --> 1:13:52.280 I love you, hot dogger burger guy. 1:13:52.600 --> 1:13:55.160 So if I'm making a big cookout, first of all, 1:13:55.280 --> 1:13:56.439 I make gray burgers. 1:13:56.439 --> 1:13:57.280 We just got a flat top. 1:13:57.320 --> 1:13:59.679 We have two flat tops, and I'm doing smash burgers 1:13:59.680 --> 1:14:04.320 for my is. They're amazing. They're amazing. But man, if 1:14:04.360 --> 1:14:06.200 I make a bunch of burgers, there's something about that 1:14:06.240 --> 1:14:11.280 hot dog. It was like, hey, start with me, and 1:14:11.360 --> 1:14:13.559 I go, okay, he said, do you know how we 1:14:13.720 --> 1:14:16.240 like it. Let's do it how we like it. And 1:14:16.320 --> 1:14:18.840 I'll do half the bun right, half the bottom, a 1:14:18.880 --> 1:14:22.160 hot half half carb guy. And and I'm still fat, 1:14:22.200 --> 1:14:24.320 but I go, I'm not as fat as I should be, right, 1:14:25.200 --> 1:14:27.680 And so I'll eat and I'll load it up all 1:14:27.720 --> 1:14:30.559 on the top. Oh, I love hot dogs. I remember 1:14:30.560 --> 1:14:31.360 one time Sagirl and. 1:14:31.320 --> 1:14:33.759 I were in Uh you could squirre mayonnaise on my face. 1:14:34.240 --> 1:14:37.240 I like brats over hot dogs. Tell me you make 1:14:37.280 --> 1:14:38.759 a hot dog? I was. I was on a journey 1:14:38.800 --> 1:14:40.639 with you right now. I think I was being lulled asleep. 1:14:40.960 --> 1:14:42.679 Was you make this hot dog? You cut it off? 1:14:42.680 --> 1:14:43.479 What do you put on it? 1:14:43.520 --> 1:14:47.920 Oh? Mustard, hot mustard, the hot mustard, The one that 1:14:48.040 --> 1:14:49.920 comes in a little jar that burns when it goes 1:14:49.920 --> 1:14:52.120 to your nose. When I went first time I went 1:14:52.160 --> 1:14:56.439 to Germany, they had they had hot dogs everywhere in 1:14:56.439 --> 1:14:58.960 this park. Everyone had like every place had a hot 1:14:58.960 --> 1:15:00.920 dog and beer. Me and my weo were just like, 1:15:01.600 --> 1:15:04.559 let's get drunkest fucking eat hot dogs and they're mustard 1:15:04.760 --> 1:15:09.559 burned and it burns. I love mustard that burns. I one, 1:15:09.640 --> 1:15:11.800 I'm Cigar, and Cigar and I were at the beach 1:15:11.880 --> 1:15:15.559 together and he watched me eat a pack of hot 1:15:15.600 --> 1:15:18.759 dogs in a day and I had diarrhea and I said. 1:15:19.280 --> 1:15:21.080 I said, like, goddamnit, I got diarrhea. And he goes, 1:15:21.160 --> 1:15:23.400 no shit, And I was like, I was like, what 1:15:23.439 --> 1:15:24.760 do you think it is? And he goes, oh, I 1:15:24.800 --> 1:15:27.519 don't know. You ate twelve glitcering sticks. And I go, 1:15:27.640 --> 1:15:30.320 what's the glycering stick? He goes, dude, lips and assholes. 1:15:30.479 --> 1:15:32.400 You've been eating hot dogs all I watched you eat 1:15:32.439 --> 1:15:34.519 twelve hot dogs and I went, yeah, they're good. 1:15:35.040 --> 1:15:36.040 And he was like, but. 1:15:36.040 --> 1:15:38.200 That's why you're sick and not supposed to eat twelve 1:15:38.240 --> 1:15:41.320 hot dogs. And I was like for real. He was like, yeah, 1:15:41.360 --> 1:15:43.519 I have a problem. With hot dogs. Man, you can't. 1:15:43.560 --> 1:15:45.280 I can't go to a Rams gaming not get the 1:15:45.280 --> 1:15:50.640 fucking street dogs. I'm just swallowing a lots. I'm like, 1:15:50.800 --> 1:15:59.920 I'm salvating. I'm so fucking hungry. But man, I fuck 1:16:00.240 --> 1:16:02.320 love hot talks. Goddamn it. I want a hot talk now. 1:16:02.520 --> 1:16:04.200 So did you rather have a hot dog or a burger? 1:16:04.520 --> 1:16:04.960 Hot talk? 1:16:05.439 --> 1:16:05.759 Really? 1:16:05.960 --> 1:16:07.920 If I go to a football game, hot talk, hot 1:16:07.920 --> 1:16:08.519 talk immediately. 1:16:08.560 --> 1:16:09.760 If you go to a football game, like, there's not 1:16:09.800 --> 1:16:11.400 gonna be like good burgers at the football I heard 1:16:11.439 --> 1:16:12.080 you mentioned the Rams. 1:16:12.080 --> 1:16:12.800 You're a Rams guy? 1:16:15.320 --> 1:16:17.800 No, no, no, like no, I had to make a 1:16:17.920 --> 1:16:21.160 conscious decision. The Rams show up in LA and my 1:16:21.240 --> 1:16:23.920 daughters wanted to be I wanted to go to football games, 1:16:23.920 --> 1:16:26.680 and so I got season tickets and my wife is like, 1:16:26.720 --> 1:16:28.759 we're a Rams family now, and I was like, okay, 1:16:29.439 --> 1:16:31.760 and uh and then and then I and then I. 1:16:31.840 --> 1:16:33.559 But I'm really a Bucks fan because I grew up 1:16:33.560 --> 1:16:37.160 in Tampa. But I I found what I liked on 1:16:37.160 --> 1:16:38.800 the Rams. He's I think he just left as Johnny 1:16:38.840 --> 1:16:42.000 Hacker to kick her. He's fucking so great and he's 1:16:42.000 --> 1:16:44.000 one of the best putters, best in the league, and 1:16:44.040 --> 1:16:46.519 I loved when I love that in Hard Knocks when 1:16:46.560 --> 1:16:49.759 he looked at uh golf and he had the football 1:16:49.800 --> 1:16:51.240 and he goes, one hundred bucks, is I cand hit 1:16:51.280 --> 1:16:53.920 the side of the field goal right now? And he's like, 1:16:54.040 --> 1:16:56.040 Gof's like, huh, there's a hundred bucks as I can 1:16:56.120 --> 1:16:58.479 hit up with the pass. He was like okay, and 1:16:58.520 --> 1:17:00.920 he just takes it and fucking and he goes, you're 1:17:01.000 --> 1:17:02.000 up in gops. 1:17:01.680 --> 1:17:04.840 Like no, and just walked away. And I love that. 1:17:05.000 --> 1:17:08.800 I love it that guy. Oh for real, no's the 1:17:08.840 --> 1:17:11.400 same thing. We do it. We live it right. Oh yeah, yeah, 1:17:11.560 --> 1:17:13.519 we put that stuff's gassed up too. Like if the 1:17:13.560 --> 1:17:16.320 Titans ever had Hard Knocks wearing it, there'd be so 1:17:16.360 --> 1:17:17.960 many fucking go hard. Do you think the same thing? 1:17:18.640 --> 1:17:21.759 Oh yeah, I see the cameras on. They'd be yeah, 1:17:21.840 --> 1:17:24.160 oh yeah, sure it would be blown up to what 1:17:24.160 --> 1:17:26.720 it really is. Camp is miserable, and I've seen a 1:17:26.760 --> 1:17:28.360 couple of clips. I've never seen a full episode. But 1:17:28.360 --> 1:17:30.080 they make Camp belly. It's a fun little deal. 1:17:30.240 --> 1:17:30.920 What they should do. 1:17:31.040 --> 1:17:34.200 What they should do is they should bring in guys 1:17:34.360 --> 1:17:36.640 like me that have a little money and let us 1:17:37.280 --> 1:17:38.840 pay to see if we can get on the team. 1:17:38.880 --> 1:17:40.639 But if we can't, that money goes to a player. 1:17:41.560 --> 1:17:43.800 I like that, Like money goes to a player, yeah, 1:17:43.800 --> 1:17:47.280 like like like someone who's doing like like because if 1:17:47.280 --> 1:17:51.040 you're if you if you went to a training camp, 1:17:51.080 --> 1:17:53.200 they you just and by the way, you tap people 1:17:53.240 --> 1:17:54.880 out right, so people would have to ring the bell 1:17:54.920 --> 1:17:56.760 and be like, I'm done. I can't do it anymore. Coach, 1:17:56.920 --> 1:17:59.040 like you're done, tottlem allhead, you gotta get out, say 1:17:59.160 --> 1:18:01.240 say it's a ten time dollars, right, So you get 1:18:01.280 --> 1:18:03.519 a bunch of guys first day of training camp, first. 1:18:03.280 --> 1:18:04.120 Gise like a bunch of. 1:18:04.120 --> 1:18:05.880 Guys got ten thousand dollars that want to pad up, 1:18:06.000 --> 1:18:07.600 see if they got what it takes. And when this 1:18:07.880 --> 1:18:09.360 second they bring the bell, they're out. And all that 1:18:09.400 --> 1:18:12.960 money then goes to players that are trying to negotiate contracts. 1:18:12.960 --> 1:18:14.479 You go, hey, we found the money for you. These 1:18:14.479 --> 1:18:15.599 guys fucking taps out. 1:18:15.760 --> 1:18:18.759 Then also you become a bigger fan of that team. 1:18:19.200 --> 1:18:21.240 I think, like I think they're doing. I think they're 1:18:21.240 --> 1:18:26.000 doing usflos is that what the Rock's doing? Usfl xfl xfl. 1:18:26.040 --> 1:18:27.599 I think he's fucking it up. And I'll tell you why. 1:18:27.920 --> 1:18:30.000 And I'll tell them how to fix it. This is 1:18:30.040 --> 1:18:32.120 how you fix it. Rock, If you're listening, this is 1:18:32.120 --> 1:18:36.400 how you fix it, and you will have a billion 1:18:36.520 --> 1:18:41.920 dollar business on your hands. Number one teams in a 1:18:42.040 --> 1:18:45.800 state can only get players from the colleges in that state. 1:18:46.560 --> 1:18:50.240 Boom you got right now, you got it Florida. You 1:18:50.320 --> 1:18:53.959 get all the guys that didn't make the cut from FSU, 1:18:54.280 --> 1:18:56.280 from UF guys that people have been cheering for for 1:18:56.320 --> 1:18:58.720 the past four years. That they know these guys, they 1:18:58.760 --> 1:19:01.639 know their stories, they they did make it, they're rooting 1:19:01.680 --> 1:19:03.960 for them. So you got great college towns, and you 1:19:04.040 --> 1:19:08.480 put those teams in the big college towns like Michigan, Ohio, 1:19:08.920 --> 1:19:14.200 fucking Oregon, Florida, fucking Alabama, you know, like and those 1:19:14.240 --> 1:19:16.280 teams and then you and then that's you can only 1:19:16.320 --> 1:19:19.000 recouverrom there because that gives civic pride. I went, I 1:19:19.000 --> 1:19:20.360 want The first thing I did, I went to an 1:19:20.360 --> 1:19:22.240 next NFL game. The first thing I did is I went, 1:19:22.600 --> 1:19:24.479 I wonder if any of these guys played for Florida State. 1:19:24.520 --> 1:19:26.920 I'm gonna go get his jersey, right And then I 1:19:26.960 --> 1:19:28.880 was like, Oh, they're no one from Florida State. I 1:19:28.920 --> 1:19:30.920 was like Oh, they don't have anyone from UCLA. Where 1:19:30.960 --> 1:19:33.360 are these guys from? And you're like, oh, just everywhere. 1:19:33.640 --> 1:19:35.720 I was like, oh, man, if fans in Florida State guys, 1:19:35.720 --> 1:19:37.160 I would have bought their jerseys. So that's kind of 1:19:37.160 --> 1:19:38.560 how it works, right. I'm not from Michigan, but I 1:19:38.600 --> 1:19:41.880 went to Michigan. I'm not from Michigan, but no, you played. 1:19:41.880 --> 1:19:43.960 Right, So like if so they say they have it's 1:19:44.000 --> 1:19:48.839 like Michigan State or like some Northeast area of recruiting. Yeah, draft, 1:19:49.160 --> 1:19:51.360 so you get picked to play on the Michigan Ohio 1:19:51.439 --> 1:19:53.519 team team. 1:19:53.720 --> 1:19:56.479 Oh yeah, that makes sense. I don't know if you'd 1:19:56.520 --> 1:19:58.839 be give enough players though, that might be difficult. 1:19:58.880 --> 1:19:59.920 Like what if there was a team in the Bran 1:20:00.120 --> 1:20:03.040 Nebraska that you would almost have to combine some states. 1:20:02.760 --> 1:20:07.160 You can region or back regions like regions. 1:20:07.200 --> 1:20:09.240 You would be like, you just had to stick to Florida, Yeah, 1:20:09.720 --> 1:20:12.080 Florida Region. 1:20:12.200 --> 1:20:15.960 Yeah, Florida and those like those kind of regions would 1:20:15.960 --> 1:20:16.479 be I. 1:20:16.520 --> 1:20:17.960 Like that because I like that a lot. 1:20:18.200 --> 1:20:20.519 What you do like that idea because what will happen 1:20:20.640 --> 1:20:23.320 is you will get people rooting for the team because 1:20:23.360 --> 1:20:26.479 they followed these kids their whole fucking careers. Yeah, and 1:20:26.520 --> 1:20:28.479 they're like, oh, fuck yeah, we used to play against 1:20:28.479 --> 1:20:30.439 that kid. He's fucking good. I didn't like him when 1:20:30.439 --> 1:20:32.679 he played with Florida, but fuck he's on our team. 1:20:32.680 --> 1:20:34.880 Now I'm getting jersey. The whole thing is like the 1:20:34.920 --> 1:20:37.320 whole thing about football. Man, I'm so sorry I started 1:20:37.320 --> 1:20:40.320 this conversation because I don't know shit. But the whole 1:20:40.320 --> 1:20:45.640 thing about football, from my perspective is you want me 1:20:45.800 --> 1:20:48.360 to know that team. You want me to know those players, 1:20:48.400 --> 1:20:50.920 You want me to know their stories. You want the 1:20:50.960 --> 1:20:53.719 more invested I am in the human beings on that field, 1:20:54.200 --> 1:20:57.040 the more I want to buy their jersey, the more 1:20:57.479 --> 1:21:00.720 that's where that is. That's the connectivity. That's what I 1:21:00.760 --> 1:21:02.680 liked about Hard Knocks is it would introduce you to 1:21:02.760 --> 1:21:04.960 a team and you get to know the players. And 1:21:05.000 --> 1:21:07.000 granted there would be a couple of standouts, but those 1:21:07.000 --> 1:21:09.320 ones that got cut, it was like, fucking don't even 1:21:09.360 --> 1:21:11.240 tell me their story because I love that kid now, 1:21:11.640 --> 1:21:12.080 like you just. 1:21:12.040 --> 1:21:13.160 Feel like I'm gonna fall in love with them. 1:21:13.200 --> 1:21:13.960 And now we're. 1:21:15.320 --> 1:21:17.400 Ndola Danny am Mandola, right, yeah. 1:21:17.360 --> 1:21:17.920 Danny Mandola. 1:21:18.040 --> 1:21:20.920 Yeah, was he got cut from the fucking Rams And 1:21:20.920 --> 1:21:23.000 then you're like, oh fuck, and then he shows up 1:21:23.000 --> 1:21:24.559 and he's like I root for that guy all the 1:21:24.600 --> 1:21:27.200 time because I watched him struggle and so like. 1:21:27.200 --> 1:21:29.000 Man, he went off on us. He lived for Houston 1:21:29.000 --> 1:21:30.680 this year, last game of the year, he went off 1:21:30.680 --> 1:21:33.519 on us. He almost lost the game, dude, because. 1:21:33.439 --> 1:21:36.800 Danny Mandola, you guys did almost lose. 1:21:36.720 --> 1:21:38.280 That Like, oh yeah, yeah, I thought you were talking, 1:21:38.560 --> 1:21:38.840 but yeah. 1:21:38.840 --> 1:21:42.320 But it's the funnest thing is to know the like 1:21:42.320 --> 1:21:45.439 like Hecker. I follow him on Instagram, I know his life, 1:21:45.439 --> 1:21:47.840 and that's part of what social media is these days. 1:21:47.840 --> 1:21:49.280 It's part of what what I think you guys were 1:21:49.320 --> 1:21:51.320 doing brilliantly. It's part of the reason I wish Pat 1:21:51.400 --> 1:21:54.880 mcabe went back to started kicking again. Is that, dude, 1:21:55.680 --> 1:21:58.000 when you become a fan, when you so explain to 1:21:58.000 --> 1:22:00.360 me this way, I'm gonna try to parallel it when 1:22:00.400 --> 1:22:02.240 you I had this kid come up to me, and 1:22:02.280 --> 1:22:04.200 people for me said this before, But this kid come 1:22:04.240 --> 1:22:06.639 up to me New Year's Eve a few years ago, 1:22:06.720 --> 1:22:08.760 a bunch of years ago back and I was at 1:22:08.960 --> 1:22:11.120 for Lauderdale Improv and he said, came up to me, 1:22:11.280 --> 1:22:14.200 Hollywood Improv, and he goes, uh, he's drunks focky shirtless. 1:22:14.200 --> 1:22:16.360 He's like, hey, man, I need I need two seconds 1:22:16.360 --> 1:22:18.160 of your time. And I was like, I was like, 1:22:18.200 --> 1:22:19.760 what do you need? And the guy's like get him 1:22:19.760 --> 1:22:20.040 out of here. 1:22:20.040 --> 1:22:20.559 I go what do you need? 1:22:20.600 --> 1:22:22.760 And he goes, no, I need to explain something to you. 1:22:23.320 --> 1:22:25.040 And I was like, okay, what is it? And he goes, 1:22:25.080 --> 1:22:27.040 I'm a fan of yours. And I was like cool. 1:22:27.640 --> 1:22:29.360 And he was like, no, you don't know what that means. 1:22:29.800 --> 1:22:31.120 And I was like, mam, yeah, I get it. Your 1:22:31.120 --> 1:22:32.320 shirt's off. You want to you want to get a 1:22:32.320 --> 1:22:34.519 shirt or picture? And he goes no, no, no, He goes, 1:22:34.560 --> 1:22:36.920 I don't have shit going on in my life. He's 1:22:37.200 --> 1:22:39.760 I don't have a girlfriend, I don't have anything. My 1:22:39.840 --> 1:22:42.880 job sucks. I don't expect much out of my life. 1:22:43.320 --> 1:22:46.320 But I'm a fan of yours. And when you succeed, 1:22:46.760 --> 1:22:49.519 it makes me feel like I succeed because I picked you. 1:22:49.960 --> 1:22:52.679 So when you have good things happen to you share 1:22:52.760 --> 1:22:55.400 them online. I want to know about them because it 1:22:55.479 --> 1:22:57.880 makes me feel like I picked the right one. And 1:22:57.920 --> 1:23:00.280 he goes, yeah I And I was like, it me 1:23:00.280 --> 1:23:02.479 away and I was like and then and I was 1:23:02.520 --> 1:23:06.240 like fuck. And then I started going, wait, what am 1:23:06.280 --> 1:23:08.400 I a fan of? Like I'm a fan of Brogans. 1:23:08.439 --> 1:23:10.960 I mean, he's my friend. I was a fan first. 1:23:11.200 --> 1:23:14.439 When Joe succeeds, I get excited. I remember reading that 1:23:14.479 --> 1:23:17.120 Spotify deal in the paper. I was like, on paper 1:23:17.200 --> 1:23:19.960 whatever fucking internet and I was like and I was like, 1:23:19.960 --> 1:23:21.840 paper makes it seem more nostalogic, though, And I got 1:23:21.880 --> 1:23:23.880 I got the chance to call him and be like, dude, 1:23:24.600 --> 1:23:27.040 fucking Congratt and he's like, yeah, yeah, I know man, 1:23:27.120 --> 1:23:30.400 And You're like, no, I pitched you start downloaded your 1:23:30.520 --> 1:23:32.439 I've been listening for nine fucking years. 1:23:32.800 --> 1:23:35.040 I wanted to say we did it, but I didn't 1:23:35.040 --> 1:23:35.840 do it. He did it. 1:23:36.000 --> 1:23:37.040 But that's what a fan is. 1:23:37.200 --> 1:23:39.080 And then I and that's when I started looking at 1:23:39.120 --> 1:23:40.840 sports and going what do I want to be a 1:23:40.880 --> 1:23:43.400 fan of? Like I want to fucking invest in something emotionally, 1:23:43.640 --> 1:23:44.120 I want. 1:23:43.920 --> 1:23:44.760 To be investing them. 1:23:44.960 --> 1:23:49.320 And it's so cool to go to an airport bar 1:23:49.400 --> 1:23:51.200 and go, hey, you guys got the Rams game on? 1:23:51.520 --> 1:23:54.439 And someone goes, oh, Rams and you're like yeah or whatever. 1:23:54.439 --> 1:23:54.760 The team. 1:23:54.880 --> 1:23:56.080 For a long time, when I was on the road, lote, 1:23:56.080 --> 1:23:58.000 I was always fan of the Cowboys only because they 1:23:58.040 --> 1:23:59.760 were played everywhere and I wanted to be a fan 1:23:59.800 --> 1:24:02.120 of And so I go, you guys got the Cowboys 1:24:02.120 --> 1:24:03.799 game on, and you'd always find someone in an airport 1:24:03.800 --> 1:24:07.479 part for the other Cowboys. And so when the Rams came, 1:24:07.479 --> 1:24:08.559 my wife's like, we're gonna be fans. 1:24:08.600 --> 1:24:10.479 I was like, all right. I watched Hard Knocks that year. 1:24:11.000 --> 1:24:13.600 I couldn't really fall in love with Gough a parallel 1:24:13.439 --> 1:24:16.960 a lot I could, but like Stafford, I love that kid. 1:24:17.120 --> 1:24:18.880 Seems like a fucking he seems like the. 1:24:18.880 --> 1:24:20.240 Kind of guy I would have liked to have played 1:24:20.240 --> 1:24:22.680 a sport with, you know, like just like withiffle ball. 1:24:22.720 --> 1:24:24.000 He seems like a kind of guy that would be. 1:24:24.040 --> 1:24:26.360 Like no, no, no, no, streetlights are coming on, my 1:24:26.360 --> 1:24:28.120 mom is there, said anything? Let's go like yeah, I 1:24:28.200 --> 1:24:32.040 love that energy, right, And I found Hecker. It is 1:24:32.120 --> 1:24:34.120 so fun to be a fan of a punter because 1:24:34.120 --> 1:24:36.120 they come up so often, and when you got a 1:24:36.160 --> 1:24:40.000 guy like Hacker. He I would make arguments that he 1:24:40.120 --> 1:24:44.160 was the MVP of the Rams every year because of 1:24:44.200 --> 1:24:47.360 the position he would put them in. The reason they 1:24:47.360 --> 1:24:49.840 were good, I'm I'm not even fucking around the reason 1:24:49.840 --> 1:24:52.479 the rams were good. We're not all the standouts. It 1:24:52.520 --> 1:24:57.639 was Johnny Hecker. He would consistently put them within five yards. 1:24:57.680 --> 1:24:59.680 Every time he punted, he would put them on their 1:24:59.720 --> 1:25:02.559 fuck asses. So the defense was given such a head 1:25:02.600 --> 1:25:06.120 start every time they were playing consistently. I mean, if 1:25:06.160 --> 1:25:07.599 you look at his stats, I gear you could pull 1:25:07.640 --> 1:25:09.479 him up and you'd be like, his stats are through 1:25:09.479 --> 1:25:10.200 the fucking roof. 1:25:10.400 --> 1:25:13.479 Guy knows placement on a fucking ball. Yeah. And it 1:25:13.560 --> 1:25:14.120 was so fun. 1:25:14.040 --> 1:25:15.640 Because he'd come out and me and my buddy Eric 1:25:15.640 --> 1:25:17.880 Crews would be like, it's our guy and we and 1:25:17.920 --> 1:25:20.519 it was like not everyone roots for a punter, but 1:25:20.600 --> 1:25:22.719 made it so much fun to root for a punter. 1:25:23.000 --> 1:25:24.679 And then when he got traded, I got so bummed. 1:25:24.680 --> 1:25:27.599 I was like, where do you go? They fucking got him, 1:25:27.840 --> 1:25:29.639 moved him any more a free agency? 1:25:29.640 --> 1:25:30.840 Now, will you guys look up where he's at? 1:25:31.040 --> 1:25:34.479 Yeah, but it's it's but having being a fan of 1:25:34.479 --> 1:25:37.680 a team is so much fun because. 1:25:37.680 --> 1:25:39.759 I think as players, you lose that, like you lose 1:25:39.800 --> 1:25:42.320 the understanding of Like when I grew up, I was 1:25:42.360 --> 1:25:43.880 never a fan of sports teams, and I was like 1:25:43.920 --> 1:25:45.360 a fan of John l Way and the Broncos when 1:25:45.360 --> 1:25:46.920 they were good in like ninety seven, ninety eight, whatever 1:25:46.920 --> 1:25:47.240 that was. 1:25:47.240 --> 1:25:51.040 Wait, how great? I mean, let's for two seconds, how 1:25:51.080 --> 1:25:53.000 great were early? 1:25:53.040 --> 1:25:53.080 So? 1:25:53.240 --> 1:25:55.400 I mean for me, I was in Florida Sunday nights 1:25:56.040 --> 1:25:59.000 when when the sun was setting over my High stadium 1:25:59.160 --> 1:26:01.040 and it was the two minutes morning and Elway was 1:26:01.080 --> 1:26:03.040 taking him down the field and your mom. 1:26:02.960 --> 1:26:05.280 Was like, hey, dinner's ready. You're like one second, mom, 1:26:05.360 --> 1:26:05.840 one second. 1:26:06.160 --> 1:26:10.000 That energy of John went Elway those Sunday nights of 1:26:10.040 --> 1:26:13.799 the fucking two minutes. They're three points down and Elway's 1:26:13.800 --> 1:26:15.479 got the ball in the eleven and he's like and 1:26:15.520 --> 1:26:17.160 you're like, and he's in the shotgun and you're like. 1:26:17.840 --> 1:26:21.240 Fucking that made that made your Monday. 1:26:20.840 --> 1:26:22.320 Because you show up at school and be like, did 1:26:22.320 --> 1:26:25.160 you see fucking the Broncos? And it seemed like every him. 1:26:25.200 --> 1:26:27.759 And the only guy I ever compared to John Elway 1:26:27.760 --> 1:26:30.240 too was Charlie Ward. Charlie Ward when he touched the 1:26:30.280 --> 1:26:33.680 ball playing for FSU, every time. 1:26:33.400 --> 1:26:34.639 You knew he was going to succeed. 1:26:34.800 --> 1:26:37.959 That's when we won the national championship third and seventeen. 1:26:38.000 --> 1:26:40.000 You're like, Charlie Ward's got this. That guy was so 1:26:40.200 --> 1:26:43.559 fucking money every time he fucking touched the ball. But 1:26:43.640 --> 1:26:46.240 that energy, that's fucking I said to my daughter, and 1:26:46.400 --> 1:26:48.240 you know it's funny. You can't appreciate it if you're 1:26:48.240 --> 1:26:52.439 not a fan. This last playoff run was so fun 1:26:52.520 --> 1:26:55.680 because every game in the last minute was changing back and. 1:26:55.800 --> 1:26:57.680 Forth and that playoffs are insane this year. 1:26:57.960 --> 1:27:00.080 And I bought my daughter's down and I go, this 1:27:00.120 --> 1:27:02.559 is why you watched the whole game. This is why 1:27:02.600 --> 1:27:04.880 you watch football, This is why you pick a team. 1:27:05.120 --> 1:27:06.360 I go, this energy. 1:27:06.439 --> 1:27:10.080 It's Sunday, the fucking sunsetting, you got a cold beer, 1:27:10.479 --> 1:27:13.160 the fucking we don't know what's gonna happen. And oh 1:27:13.240 --> 1:27:15.560 my god, and my daughters just they were like, I 1:27:15.600 --> 1:27:17.640 don't get it. And I was like, I should have 1:27:17.640 --> 1:27:19.880 had boys, boys. 1:27:21.720 --> 1:27:24.719 On the fans. Talking with Mike Stunn, we were talking 1:27:24.760 --> 1:27:28.080 on like a different level of Mike was basically on 1:27:28.080 --> 1:27:29.360 the on the game plan of like you need to 1:27:29.400 --> 1:27:31.599 live your life. Let me need to live their own life. 1:27:31.640 --> 1:27:34.400 No no, no, let me tell you. Uh no no 1:27:34.600 --> 1:27:41.120 no no no uh uh wide receiver for the Buffalo Bills. 1:27:41.400 --> 1:27:44.799 Uh no, no, no, no no no. The White Boys, 1:27:44.840 --> 1:27:48.040 Cap Davis, you want to talk about how fun this is. 1:27:48.240 --> 1:27:54.840 Check this out, Gabe Davis. Gabe Davis tweets type in 1:27:54.920 --> 1:27:59.479 two bears one cave. Gabe Davis tweets a picture of 1:27:59.520 --> 1:28:05.400 his cleat. Do you wo yeah? Two as in three. 1:28:06.360 --> 1:28:10.000 So Gave Davis gets these cleats made right, all this 1:28:11.080 --> 1:28:13.800 he makes my buddy Mashie, he makes. He makes our 1:28:13.880 --> 1:28:16.360 two Barry shoe. He makes these for Gabe Davis. 1:28:16.920 --> 1:28:17.120 Right. 1:28:17.240 --> 1:28:19.200 Check the date on this. I'm not only because I 1:28:19.200 --> 1:28:21.000 think you'll figure out when when when? 1:28:21.000 --> 1:28:24.400 This was? Uh no? 1:28:25.000 --> 1:28:27.320 So he makes his shoes. I guess you wear them 1:28:27.320 --> 1:28:28.800 in warm ups. It's a warm up shoe. 1:28:28.800 --> 1:28:29.960 I don't. I'm not really sure how shoes. 1:28:30.160 --> 1:28:32.080 I think you can wear like my cause my cleat, 1:28:32.120 --> 1:28:33.800 but I don't think those are my cauts, right, those 1:28:33.960 --> 1:28:36.000 can wear those for like warm ups before a game, 1:28:36.000 --> 1:28:37.800 but then you have to put on other shoes. 1:28:38.200 --> 1:28:41.000 So he wears them. He wears them. We watched the. 1:28:40.960 --> 1:28:43.639 Game and Tom and I are like, fucking Gabe Davis, dude, 1:28:43.680 --> 1:28:46.400 how cool is this? The next game, he goes and 1:28:46.400 --> 1:28:49.320 has one of the most spectacular performances of his career. 1:28:49.360 --> 1:28:51.599 I would argue he went off against the Cheese. Yes, 1:28:52.120 --> 1:28:54.639 and then that they ended up losing. But he has 1:28:54.960 --> 1:29:01.040 a spectacular fucking yes, why don't see this? Holy shit, 1:29:01.960 --> 1:29:04.680 I haven't seen this, but but he has four tds 1:29:04.720 --> 1:29:09.400 for Buffalo and me and Tom had just become fans 1:29:09.439 --> 1:29:12.000 of his the week before, right, he's now our guy. 1:29:12.040 --> 1:29:14.439 He made clean some star faces on it, where Tom's like, 1:29:14.479 --> 1:29:16.080 you know, Gabe Davis. I was like fuck, no, I 1:29:16.080 --> 1:29:18.240 don't fucking know anything, and he's like, dude, the guy 1:29:18.280 --> 1:29:20.080 made cleans fus and we're like fuck, so we watching 1:29:20.080 --> 1:29:22.000 that week is a good game. The next week, Tom's 1:29:22.040 --> 1:29:24.800 text me, dude, Gave Davis is going off, and we're like, fuck, 1:29:25.600 --> 1:29:28.280 now it's our guy and we're fucking losing it. And 1:29:28.320 --> 1:29:31.280 that energy it's only akin to gambling. Like when gambling, 1:29:31.320 --> 1:29:33.040 when you put money on a game, it makes the 1:29:33.040 --> 1:29:34.840 game so much more fun. The only thing better than 1:29:34.840 --> 1:29:36.880 that is to have a guy you're invested in and 1:29:36.920 --> 1:29:39.240 to be texting with a friend like dude Gave Davis 1:29:39.360 --> 1:29:41.479 is going off. Shut the fuck up. Everyone's text me 1:29:41.520 --> 1:29:43.519 Eric Cruz and you see gay Davis out there. Everyone's 1:29:43.560 --> 1:29:46.280 talking about Gab Davis and we're fans of his now 1:29:46.600 --> 1:29:49.439 and we're watching it and you're that energy when wait, 1:29:49.479 --> 1:29:51.800 how often in the day do you how often in 1:29:51.840 --> 1:29:54.200 anyone's day thinking right now, no sports can't talk about 1:29:54.200 --> 1:29:56.080 sports right now? How often do you go sit in 1:29:56.080 --> 1:30:00.559 your couch go fuck yeah? Never never, never, big never 1:30:00.720 --> 1:30:02.759 you get your even when your wife tells you you're pregnant, 1:30:02.800 --> 1:30:05.240 it's not that energy of when gave Davis scores a touchdown, 1:30:05.560 --> 1:30:07.280 like it's just like, oh, Coig, it's riving a baby. 1:30:07.360 --> 1:30:08.280 But when how. 1:30:08.120 --> 1:30:09.120 Often do you get to go. 1:30:09.240 --> 1:30:11.880 Fuck God, damn it, go go. 1:30:11.560 --> 1:30:12.960 Go like that energy? 1:30:13.240 --> 1:30:15.400 You get that when you're a fucking fan, When you're 1:30:15.439 --> 1:30:18.160 a fucking fan, and he's telling me, will he's telling me, dude, 1:30:18.240 --> 1:30:21.280 when you're a fan, Okay, I'll tell you. I'll tell you. Uh, 1:30:21.560 --> 1:30:23.960 Anthony jessel Nick. I'm a fan of Anthony chessel Nicks. Right, 1:30:24.160 --> 1:30:27.200 Anthony jessel Nick does this last special and he opens 1:30:27.240 --> 1:30:30.160 with the best joke I've ever heard in my fucking life. 1:30:30.560 --> 1:30:32.599 In my life, I'm gonna tell you the joke. I'm sorry, Anthony, 1:30:32.640 --> 1:30:35.479 I know I'm raping it, but he wants to play 1:30:35.520 --> 1:30:38.559 every quick Uh yes see, if you have it, Anthony jessel. 1:30:38.400 --> 1:30:42.439 Nicks, we's just keep this energy going, but this energy. 1:30:42.520 --> 1:30:44.680 So I'm a fan of Anthony's. I love Anthony's the 1:30:44.680 --> 1:30:48.479 greatest guy. And he he tells the joke opening joke 1:30:48.520 --> 1:30:50.160 of a spout. My favorite thing on a good special 1:30:50.439 --> 1:30:52.320 is you tell me a fucking joke. You tell me 1:30:52.320 --> 1:30:54.439 a fucking joke. I don't want to hear where you're sitting. 1:30:54.920 --> 1:30:56.240 I don't want to hear the city you're in. I 1:30:56.240 --> 1:30:58.200 don't want to hear about them. I want you to 1:30:58.240 --> 1:31:00.200 tell me a joke. That's when I know you're doing right. 1:31:00.200 --> 1:31:00.640 And that's me. 1:31:00.680 --> 1:31:03.160 That's my role, that's my role. Anthony Jeslin tells a joke. 1:31:03.280 --> 1:31:05.240 You come out, you don't say, hey, welcome away. 1:31:05.840 --> 1:31:08.000 Thank you. I don't go philly. 1:31:08.600 --> 1:31:11.640 Yeah, like like I go up and I mean, I 1:31:11.680 --> 1:31:15.080 try to have my food in my words ten first words. 1:31:15.160 --> 1:31:17.320 There's a joke coming out of my mouth. Yeah, you 1:31:17.320 --> 1:31:19.559 do not care anything but get drinking and telling secrets. 1:31:19.560 --> 1:31:21.960 Secret time. Sometimes when I wipe my ass, I spin 1:31:22.040 --> 1:31:23.680 on the toilet paper. It's called a Misissippi wht wipe 1:31:23.720 --> 1:31:26.080 Secret time, Serie time. Sometimes the other shower, I draw 1:31:26.120 --> 1:31:28.360 my ass on the bed boom, Secret time, ser your time. 1:31:28.360 --> 1:31:30.200 When my phone was an orgasm. She looks like Elvis 1:31:30.960 --> 1:31:33.080 sect time. All right, and then we're in right, three 1:31:33.160 --> 1:31:35.880 jokes right there. Boom boom, boom boom, And I hope 1:31:35.960 --> 1:31:38.200 that the feeling I give you is if you're a 1:31:38.240 --> 1:31:39.760 fan of mine, you go boom burnt. 1:31:39.760 --> 1:31:40.280 Did it again? 1:31:40.680 --> 1:31:42.679 Oh and we got a good special, honey, hip pause, 1:31:42.760 --> 1:31:44.920 get a cocktail. Let's light it up, turn the lights down. 1:31:45.000 --> 1:31:47.240 Fuck you know what, Let's save this, save this for tonight, 1:31:47.320 --> 1:31:49.320 late night. That's what I want when you watch my 1:31:49.360 --> 1:31:52.000 special Anthony Jeslyll It tells his first fucking joke. 1:31:52.040 --> 1:31:52.639 Do you find it? 1:31:53.680 --> 1:31:56.040 Don't worry, I'm gonna tell you the joke. He says. 1:31:56.160 --> 1:32:00.799 Uh, my friend's married. My friend is married to a woman. 1:32:01.640 --> 1:32:04.439 Uh oh, yep, this is This is the best fucking joke. 1:32:04.680 --> 1:32:05.200 Turn it up. 1:32:05.360 --> 1:32:08.800 This is this is funny. This friend's life is born again. 1:32:08.960 --> 1:32:10.679 Christians, hit pause, hit pause, hit pause. 1:32:11.720 --> 1:32:14.600 Uh, ladies, jolemen. I know we're we're interrupting again, and 1:32:14.640 --> 1:32:16.960 it's fucking pissing everybody off. But here's the deal. If 1:32:17.000 --> 1:32:19.280 it's Tuesday and you're watching part one, if it's Thursday 1:32:19.320 --> 1:32:21.479 and you're watching part two right now, in between those 1:32:21.520 --> 1:32:24.600 two right here, like my noses. Merch is dropping. We 1:32:24.640 --> 1:32:26.640 got hats, we got t shirts, we got everything is 1:32:26.920 --> 1:32:30.519 dropping on our website. It's new, it's beautiful. You're gonna 1:32:30.520 --> 1:32:32.720 love it. Please enjoy the rest of the show. Whether 1:32:32.800 --> 1:32:34.479 it's you can buy us tomorrow or you could have 1:32:34.479 --> 1:32:36.920 bought this yesterday. Please enjoy the rest of the show. 1:32:37.000 --> 1:32:39.519 Love you so much, big Hugstanny kisses this. 1:32:41.160 --> 1:32:44.439 You got put in context. The special opens Ladies and Gentlemen, 1:32:44.479 --> 1:32:47.400 Anthony jess Nick. We are talking ten seconds into especially 1:32:47.400 --> 1:32:47.959 he tells. 1:32:47.720 --> 1:32:50.240 This joke right right. His best friend's wife is a 1:32:50.280 --> 1:32:52.960 borning and Christian hit play and we get a. 1:32:57.640 --> 1:33:05.080 Terrible influence on her husband because her what did he 1:33:05.160 --> 1:33:12.200 call you a bitch? He did not use the word. 1:33:19.560 --> 1:33:28.000 Did he call you a cut? I said, Well, then 1:33:28.000 --> 1:33:29.519 he didn't hear it from me? 1:33:32.479 --> 1:33:35.599 Fucking I hit pause, I go make a cocktail. 1:33:36.040 --> 1:33:37.360 I got something to do for the next hour. 1:33:37.800 --> 1:33:40.639 Yeah, because he's my guy, I like, I love, I 1:33:40.760 --> 1:33:43.000 love being a fan of something. And it's and it's 1:33:43.040 --> 1:33:45.559 the coolest thing to hear your perspective because you guys 1:33:45.600 --> 1:33:48.400 are so into weeds on it. But like it's the dude, 1:33:49.160 --> 1:33:50.800 I mean, you guys have so many fans of this 1:33:50.840 --> 1:33:53.800 podcast that when they watch you on the weekend, they're 1:33:53.800 --> 1:33:56.519 seeing so much more than you think. They're seeing so 1:33:56.680 --> 1:33:59.439 much more. And that's why I think, and when we 1:33:59.479 --> 1:34:01.439 get back to the very beginning of this podcast, you're like, 1:34:01.439 --> 1:34:04.360 what got you to this podcast? It was that I'm 1:34:04.400 --> 1:34:06.280 seeing a different side of two guys that I would 1:34:06.360 --> 1:34:08.759 normally see. Same with Pat McAfee. I'm seeing a different 1:34:08.760 --> 1:34:10.800 side of them. They're opening up a part of the 1:34:10.880 --> 1:34:14.479 personality that they wouldn't they're only sharing with their teammates 1:34:14.479 --> 1:34:17.000 and their family, they're sharing it with us, and it's like, 1:34:17.280 --> 1:34:18.960 holy shit, man, that's cool as fuck. 1:34:19.040 --> 1:34:21.519 Like and that's when I say they get it. 1:34:21.520 --> 1:34:25.040 It's like, you have no idea, Like what what a 1:34:25.040 --> 1:34:27.559 connection you have with the people watching this? You're you're 1:34:27.920 --> 1:34:31.000 you guys drop names casually because you know them, but 1:34:31.040 --> 1:34:33.120 everyone else is like, oh, shut shut the fuck up 1:34:33.240 --> 1:34:38.599 for real, Like it's my favorite thing about about life 1:34:38.760 --> 1:34:42.680 is for real, is getting into something, really getting into it, 1:34:42.720 --> 1:34:46.919 like whether it be watches or bull mastiffs or or cars, 1:34:47.400 --> 1:34:49.640 or begetting into it, getting Passionate's why we started Two 1:34:49.640 --> 1:34:51.720 Bears Racing because Tom is so into racing, and I 1:34:51.720 --> 1:34:54.840 thought passion begets passion. You talked to Tom about when I 1:34:54.880 --> 1:34:56.800 talk about Tom, that race car. You know, the first 1:34:56.800 --> 1:34:59.880 person he called his racing coach, not his wife, his 1:35:00.200 --> 1:35:03.160 racing coach and said, look what I got for my birthday. 1:35:03.680 --> 1:35:06.360 It's like a child. I was like, fuck, yeah, man, 1:35:06.479 --> 1:35:08.320 it's awesome. And then he called me that night and 1:35:08.320 --> 1:35:10.559 he goes, hey, I'm with my boys. Can you send 1:35:10.600 --> 1:35:11.960 me some pictures of the car. I don't have any 1:35:11.960 --> 1:35:13.599 on my phone. I want to show them what I got. 1:35:13.680 --> 1:35:16.240 And I hear them fast sticks send pictures. Now they 1:35:16.280 --> 1:35:18.920 call me fast sticks. Yeah, So I send, and so 1:35:18.960 --> 1:35:22.920 I send pictures and but that. But Tom's a fan 1:35:22.960 --> 1:35:25.320 of racing. He loves that shit. So to watch that 1:35:25.640 --> 1:35:28.360 kind of swell in him, it's fun to see and 1:35:28.400 --> 1:35:30.280 it's fun to be a part of, man. And that's 1:35:30.280 --> 1:35:31.920 what I will go back to the old school. Rogan 1:35:32.200 --> 1:35:34.519 is you hit up just fans of the podcast, and 1:35:34.560 --> 1:35:36.759 you just talk about shit you like talking about. 1:35:36.960 --> 1:35:38.400 You know, it's the coolest thing. 1:35:38.439 --> 1:35:40.599 I love being a fan and I'm glad I found 1:35:40.600 --> 1:35:42.120 you guys to be a fan of God. 1:35:42.120 --> 1:35:45.040 That's fucking dude. You fired us up like nothing other 1:35:45.160 --> 1:35:48.439 just now. I was unbelievable because there's so many people 1:35:48.439 --> 1:35:51.360 that take that, take that for granted. Us included, absolutely, 1:35:51.400 --> 1:35:53.840 we take that for granted, and we don't know because 1:35:53.880 --> 1:35:56.320 you're so conditioned to focus on the next thing, next day, 1:35:56.360 --> 1:35:58.040 next thing all the time that you forget to be 1:35:58.080 --> 1:35:59.760 present where you're at. Yeah. 1:35:59.840 --> 1:36:02.920 My wife gave me a great quote one time about. 1:36:04.120 --> 1:36:06.680 Because there's a week, you can get focused on that, 1:36:06.680 --> 1:36:09.320 and you also get focused on humility and like I 1:36:09.320 --> 1:36:10.800 don't want to I don't want to flash too much 1:36:10.880 --> 1:36:13.200 or whatever. I don't want to, you know, live my 1:36:13.240 --> 1:36:15.280 life too bright or whatever. And my wife gave me 1:36:15.320 --> 1:36:17.799 a great quote and I read it to Ari Shafer 1:36:17.920 --> 1:36:20.720 because Ari is always about like not putting your life 1:36:20.760 --> 1:36:23.360 out on Instagram. Like, do you know who Jack Whitehall is. 1:36:23.520 --> 1:36:27.960 He's a comedian. He's very talented. He did a show 1:36:28.000 --> 1:36:30.840 on Netflix called Traveling with My Father. I think it's 1:36:30.880 --> 1:36:32.519 really good. 1:36:33.240 --> 1:36:33.479 Dude. 1:36:33.479 --> 1:36:35.680 I looked at his Instagram today. I pull up his 1:36:35.760 --> 1:36:39.680 Instagram and I know I know him, like I think 1:36:39.680 --> 1:36:42.400 I've met him and with whatever. I looked at his 1:36:42.479 --> 1:36:44.800 Instagram and I was like, I want to beat him. 1:36:45.280 --> 1:36:48.360 Go scroll down of like like like, look at it. 1:36:48.400 --> 1:36:50.240 There's him at the super Bowl, like everything he does. 1:36:50.240 --> 1:36:52.040 Look at him and his chick. His chick is one 1:36:52.080 --> 1:36:53.600 of the most beautiful women I've ever seen in my 1:36:53.600 --> 1:36:57.559 fucking life. And like, he just lives this really cool life. 1:36:57.600 --> 1:36:59.960 And what he's doing is he's allowing himself to show 1:37:00.800 --> 1:37:03.120 and not being humble or being like He's like, this 1:37:03.160 --> 1:37:04.720 is what I do, this is my life, and this 1:37:04.800 --> 1:37:07.760 is my authentic representation of it as a dude sitting 1:37:07.800 --> 1:37:09.800 on a tour bus throwing up in his throat last 1:37:09.840 --> 1:37:12.880 night all night I see my new thing. I was 1:37:12.880 --> 1:37:15.200 sitting there and I was like, goddamn it, man, I 1:37:15.280 --> 1:37:17.360 fucking like Jack Why. He's funny as fucking shit. He's 1:37:17.360 --> 1:37:19.599 a fucking Hilaiero's comic. And I was like, I like him. 1:37:19.640 --> 1:37:21.320 I'm gonna I'm gonna follow him. I don't even know 1:37:21.360 --> 1:37:23.800 if he follows me. I'm gonna follow him, and man, 1:37:23.840 --> 1:37:25.519 I hope I get to meet him. He seems like 1:37:25.520 --> 1:37:28.000 a really cool dude. But that's all that, you know, 1:37:28.479 --> 1:37:30.160 It's all that being a fan is. And then when 1:37:30.160 --> 1:37:32.400 he sells his next book, I'm gonna be like, oh, 1:37:32.400 --> 1:37:33.880 I get it. Like Colin Quinn writes a book, I 1:37:33.920 --> 1:37:35.160 buy it. I love Colin Quinn. 1:37:35.240 --> 1:37:39.439 Really yeah, it's unbelievable, dude. What a unique perspective to 1:37:39.479 --> 1:37:41.519 have on something from somebody that has done so much 1:37:41.560 --> 1:37:42.599 and has lots of fans. 1:37:42.840 --> 1:37:45.960 Well, yeah, thank you. I think. 1:37:46.120 --> 1:37:48.040 I think I that's one of the things that I'm 1:37:48.200 --> 1:37:51.519 very accessible, like, I'm way too accessible. And I think 1:37:51.560 --> 1:37:53.960 one of the reasons is is because I see myself 1:37:54.000 --> 1:37:55.920 as them in the audience, because that would be me. 1:37:56.080 --> 1:37:56.600 It was me. 1:37:57.000 --> 1:37:59.679 I would go see comics like the place I'm forming 1:37:59.680 --> 1:38:03.080 out to an the Ryman I was at probably six 1:38:03.120 --> 1:38:05.200 seven years ago, and I was Slarry the Cable Guy, 1:38:05.200 --> 1:38:07.360 and Angela Johnson there, Me and Nate Bargozzi and Ri 1:38:07.439 --> 1:38:10.320 Shafear went and watched them, and I had a very 1:38:10.320 --> 1:38:13.600 different perspective than both of those guys. Nates was, I 1:38:13.640 --> 1:38:16.760 mean this respectfully, but Nates was, I'll be here one day. 1:38:17.720 --> 1:38:20.479 Nate very confidently knows how talented he is. And I 1:38:20.479 --> 1:38:23.680 don't mean that he's not arrogant. He knows he is 1:38:23.760 --> 1:38:27.200 extremely talented, and he knows he's not dirty, and he 1:38:27.280 --> 1:38:31.360 knows that he knows, he really knows everyone should like him. 1:38:31.400 --> 1:38:34.240 He knows that and he's not wrong. Everyone should like 1:38:34.320 --> 1:38:39.439 Nate Bargotzi. He is fucking undeniable. He is hilarious. Ari's 1:38:39.439 --> 1:38:42.680 perspective is I'll never perform here. That was as perspective. 1:38:43.120 --> 1:38:45.800 My perspective was, why do you think his was like that, 1:38:45.800 --> 1:38:47.920 that's not me. Oddly enough, I already performed there the 1:38:48.000 --> 1:38:50.840 other night, but really, yeah, oddly enough. But he just 1:38:50.880 --> 1:38:53.120 was like, don't care about it, don't need it. 1:38:53.120 --> 1:38:54.280 It's not me, it's not my books. 1:38:54.320 --> 1:38:56.760 Don't care, don't need money, don't need fame, don't need fans, 1:38:56.760 --> 1:38:58.679 don't need anything. All I want to do is comedy. 1:38:58.760 --> 1:39:00.800 Don't give a fuck about any of the trappings. That's sorry, 1:39:00.920 --> 1:39:03.120 I don't give a fuck about it. I just not 1:39:03.600 --> 1:39:06.720 on my not on my radar. Really, I sat there 1:39:06.720 --> 1:39:10.200 and I thought, I thought, how do I get here? 1:39:10.800 --> 1:39:13.320 Like I remember thinking I wonder if I will perform here? 1:39:13.880 --> 1:39:16.320 And then I remember like meeting Angela. Angel Johnson has 1:39:16.320 --> 1:39:18.519 this great nail salon bit that like made her really famous. 1:39:18.520 --> 1:39:20.280 But I remember saying to God, I was like, God, 1:39:20.880 --> 1:39:23.360 give me one bit. I'll milk it for my If 1:39:23.400 --> 1:39:25.080 you're telling me that the only way I get here 1:39:25.080 --> 1:39:26.320 is I gotta tell the machine story. 1:39:26.200 --> 1:39:28.800 Down the show in a fucking heart beat. 1:39:28.920 --> 1:39:30.760 I get to do an hour from original material and 1:39:30.760 --> 1:39:32.600 then tell the machine give it to me. Then we 1:39:32.680 --> 1:39:36.160 go backstage, meet Larry the cable guy. Cable guys like, hey, 1:39:36.240 --> 1:39:38.600 let's have a beer and bullshit once talk comedy. But 1:39:38.680 --> 1:39:40.200 I got a private jet to cash and I was like, 1:39:40.920 --> 1:39:43.559 can you imagine getting on a private jet after a 1:39:43.600 --> 1:39:47.000 show at the Ryman? And then I come here and 1:39:47.040 --> 1:39:49.320 I do one show at the grand old Opry two 1:39:49.320 --> 1:39:52.519 with the Ryman. Next time I'll be at the fucking 1:39:52.520 --> 1:39:55.599 bridge Stone and private jets are and then I go. 1:39:56.360 --> 1:39:57.639 Man, if I think if I. 1:39:57.560 --> 1:40:01.639 Didn't appreciate for me, if I was the negative guy, 1:40:01.920 --> 1:40:04.000 or if I was for me, if I was confident, 1:40:04.160 --> 1:40:06.000 I would never have gotten there. I need to really 1:40:06.040 --> 1:40:08.599 appreciate the moment and go. I'll do whatever I can 1:40:08.680 --> 1:40:10.320 to get here. I can see it from this side 1:40:10.320 --> 1:40:13.519 of the fence right now, Like it's like do you 1:40:13.560 --> 1:40:15.880 ever see like do you ever see like guys that 1:40:16.640 --> 1:40:20.439 I don't know. A A D is his name, ab 1:40:20.720 --> 1:40:23.520 A B. I don't know him Brown, I don't know him. 1:40:24.600 --> 1:40:28.799 He strikes me as someone who maybe takes some stuff 1:40:28.800 --> 1:40:32.960 for granted. And I look at someone like myself who 1:40:33.080 --> 1:40:35.840 made success later in his career, where I go, I'll 1:40:35.880 --> 1:40:38.400 never take anything for granted, Like and I know guys 1:40:38.439 --> 1:40:40.840 that got success very early on and they took it 1:40:40.880 --> 1:40:42.400 for granted and then they just kind of went away. 1:40:42.880 --> 1:40:45.479 And I imagine that would be what you guys see 1:40:45.479 --> 1:40:47.840 in the NFL as like dudes who have been in 1:40:47.880 --> 1:40:51.439 the hustle all the time, always struggling to make sure 1:40:51.439 --> 1:40:54.679 they make the team, always struggling, always training, always trying 1:40:54.680 --> 1:40:56.720 to make sure that they make the cut, and they 1:40:56.760 --> 1:40:58.920 never take it for granted. Like that's what I and 1:40:59.000 --> 1:41:01.760 I think that's the closest thing I am to that 1:41:01.840 --> 1:41:04.760 and that comes from the fans. Shit, you know really? Yeah, yeah, 1:41:05.000 --> 1:41:06.479 I was, dude, I was. I told you I was 1:41:06.479 --> 1:41:08.559 at the bottom of my career. Thomas making more money 1:41:08.560 --> 1:41:12.040 than I was. I was fucking I didn't have any 1:41:12.080 --> 1:41:13.400 tour days and I had to figure it out on 1:41:13.400 --> 1:41:17.040 my own. And trust me when I say there's a 1:41:17.080 --> 1:41:19.799 thing called survivor's remorse. 1:41:21.760 --> 1:41:23.439 It's meant for like guys to go. 1:41:23.360 --> 1:41:24.640 To war and they come home and lay in their 1:41:24.640 --> 1:41:26.400 pool and they have a hard time enjoying it because 1:41:26.400 --> 1:41:28.000 they remember all the guys that didn't get to come 1:41:28.040 --> 1:41:30.120 home and go to the pool. Well, you can get that, 1:41:30.200 --> 1:41:31.680 and you probably can get it in the NFL. I'm 1:41:31.680 --> 1:41:33.680 certain you can. I'm certain you can, and I know 1:41:33.720 --> 1:41:36.160 you can get it in comedy because when I was 1:41:36.720 --> 1:41:38.600 dead and I wasn't going anywhere and I was like, 1:41:38.600 --> 1:41:40.439 I don't know how I'm gonna fucking make money. 1:41:40.240 --> 1:41:40.959 In this business. 1:41:41.280 --> 1:41:43.200 I would be at the store and you'd watch people 1:41:43.240 --> 1:41:46.360 talk to you and go like this, like look over 1:41:46.400 --> 1:41:48.120 your shoulder, and you be in the middle of sentence 1:41:48.120 --> 1:41:50.479 and they'd be like, oh, hey, Chris Rock, what's up, 1:41:50.479 --> 1:41:51.920 and then just leave you in the middle of sentence, 1:41:51.960 --> 1:41:54.559 and you'd be like, I guess I have no currency 1:41:54.600 --> 1:41:55.200 with this person. 1:41:55.280 --> 1:41:58.600 I'm not famous. I remember that happening to me a lot. 1:41:58.720 --> 1:42:01.120 And then you pop and become the guy that everyone 1:42:01.640 --> 1:42:04.320 looks you in the eye and you see them talk 1:42:04.400 --> 1:42:06.800 to your buddy who you were always here and here 1:42:06.800 --> 1:42:08.599 with they're talking to them, and then they do it 1:42:08.640 --> 1:42:12.320 for you and you go, oh, fuck, man, I was 1:42:12.360 --> 1:42:15.880 that guy a year ago now in this guy, but 1:42:15.960 --> 1:42:17.720 I could have always been this guy. That guy was 1:42:17.720 --> 1:42:20.800 my career, and so I'm sure you guys have to 1:42:20.840 --> 1:42:22.920 see that in the NFL, but we see it in 1:42:22.960 --> 1:42:24.400 the in comedy. 1:42:24.400 --> 1:42:27.120 It's like people look past you all the time. It's Hollywood. 1:42:27.160 --> 1:42:28.680 They don't give anything that has to do is like 1:42:28.720 --> 1:42:31.800 celebrity status, anything that puts you or people want to 1:42:31.840 --> 1:42:34.600 be one hundred percent. That happens all the time. Like 1:42:34.720 --> 1:42:37.000 Derrick Henry. If Derek Henry is walking behind me or 1:42:37.080 --> 1:42:39.479 running back, whoever I'm talking to is no longer just 1:42:39.560 --> 1:42:42.000 did what I'm talking to them about. They are on 1:42:42.200 --> 1:42:45.439 him a J. Ryan like it's it's really like that. 1:42:45.840 --> 1:42:48.200 But how do you think when you when you were 1:42:48.240 --> 1:42:50.400 at that point in your life where it's like, all right, 1:42:50.479 --> 1:42:52.679 Tom's doing so much better than I am. I'm getting 1:42:52.680 --> 1:42:54.960 paid two thousand things. You're doing a lot of stuff, 1:42:55.280 --> 1:42:58.519 but there's not a lot coming from it. Like what changes, 1:42:58.680 --> 1:43:00.760 like dramatic changes? Did you have to like right away 1:43:00.760 --> 1:43:03.640 that someone who's listening could be like, that's what I 1:43:03.680 --> 1:43:04.040 gotta do. 1:43:04.320 --> 1:43:05.920 Oh oh, I'll tell you. 1:43:06.000 --> 1:43:08.360 I said this to someone, said this is someone the 1:43:08.360 --> 1:43:11.400 other day They were they were like, what am I 1:43:11.479 --> 1:43:13.800 doing wrong that you didn't do? And I said, first 1:43:13.800 --> 1:43:16.559 of all, you're with me, like you're I would never 1:43:16.600 --> 1:43:17.120 have been with me. 1:43:17.320 --> 1:43:17.680 I would have. 1:43:18.160 --> 1:43:21.760 I would have I never turned my fucking brain off. 1:43:21.840 --> 1:43:27.120 I was obsessed. I was obsessed about every aspect of 1:43:27.160 --> 1:43:30.160 stand up comedy. I was obsessive about jokes. I was 1:43:30.160 --> 1:43:33.400 obsessive about stage time. I was obsessed with about content. 1:43:33.600 --> 1:43:35.920 I was obsessive about ideas I would. 1:43:35.960 --> 1:43:36.840 And I and I. 1:43:37.240 --> 1:43:39.640 The other thing is I didn't listen to anyone. I 1:43:39.640 --> 1:43:42.560 started listening to myself. Perfect example, I wanted to do 1:43:42.600 --> 1:43:44.799 a dance video. I wanted to do a dance challenge 1:43:44.800 --> 1:43:47.400 for so Brocktober one year, and Rogan was like, I 1:43:47.400 --> 1:43:50.519 think it's stupid, and and then Ari and Tom are like, yeah, 1:43:50.920 --> 1:43:52.080 I want to do it. And I was like okay, 1:43:52.400 --> 1:43:53.960 and I was like I still think it's a good idea. 1:43:54.040 --> 1:43:56.000 So I took dance lessons from a hip hop dancer 1:43:56.240 --> 1:43:58.559 and I did a dance video and I promoted my 1:43:58.600 --> 1:44:02.760 tour dates on the side, and I sold out every show, immediately, 1:44:02.880 --> 1:44:05.720 added second shows, sold out all of them. I was 1:44:05.760 --> 1:44:08.640 obsessed with it. I was just like like, yeah, this 1:44:08.720 --> 1:44:12.519 is the video. I did this video and then and 1:44:12.560 --> 1:44:16.120 this is the interesting story is that I was obsessed 1:44:16.160 --> 1:44:18.439 about I was obsessed about selling tickets. 1:44:18.760 --> 1:44:21.200 Yeah, this is uh Glazer. 1:44:21.720 --> 1:44:23.519 I was obsessed with selling tickets and I and I 1:44:24.560 --> 1:44:25.559 I just wouldn't stop thinking. 1:44:25.600 --> 1:44:26.479 I had a million ideas. 1:44:26.600 --> 1:44:26.920 I and I. 1:44:27.439 --> 1:44:30.920 I never sat back and enjoyed the roses and smelled them. 1:44:30.920 --> 1:44:33.040 I just was going, like, I got a tour coming up, 1:44:33.080 --> 1:44:34.639 how do I sell tickets? And I was like, it's 1:44:34.640 --> 1:44:36.880 gotta It's gotta be something. It can't just be like 1:44:36.920 --> 1:44:39.000 hey guys, Cause hey guys, I got a brand new tour. 1:44:39.040 --> 1:44:39.439 Come out of there. 1:44:39.479 --> 1:44:41.320 I go, I want to. I want to razzle dazzle it. 1:44:41.360 --> 1:44:41.680 I want to. 1:44:41.920 --> 1:44:43.640 So I rese out this girl. My daughter and I 1:44:43.720 --> 1:44:46.160 liked her dancing. D Glazer and my daughters and I 1:44:46.160 --> 1:44:48.479 would past video. She's a great dancer. I said, hey, 1:44:48.560 --> 1:44:50.360 how much would it cost me to coach me in dancing? 1:44:50.400 --> 1:44:52.760 She goes twelve hundred bucks. I said great, So we went, 1:44:53.080 --> 1:44:55.240 we designed a dance, we did a dance. We shot 1:44:55.280 --> 1:45:00.160 this in two takes. I posted it, uh and it 1:45:00.160 --> 1:45:04.760 went it blew up, and immediately my agent called me 1:45:04.760 --> 1:45:06.880 and he goes, we just sold out your whole tour. 1:45:07.000 --> 1:45:09.160 It was like fifteen minutes after I posted it. It's 1:45:09.200 --> 1:45:11.880 like fucking six hundred thousand views fifteen minutes after I 1:45:11.960 --> 1:45:14.559 mean like took off. He's like, we sold out your 1:45:14.560 --> 1:45:17.400 whole tour. We're adding second shows. Second shows sell out. 1:45:17.439 --> 1:45:20.200 The next day. He goes, hey, we're gonna add third shows. 1:45:20.200 --> 1:45:22.639 Four shows. We add third and four shows. Go ahead 1:45:22.640 --> 1:45:29.680 and play the video. It's it's just very simple. The 1:45:29.680 --> 1:45:33.040 best part of this video. The best part of this 1:45:33.200 --> 1:45:35.760 video is Tom sees it. 1:45:35.880 --> 1:45:38.840 Bro Tom's and look cloud bike is so funny. 1:45:38.520 --> 1:45:40.120 And so Tom does this. 1:45:40.439 --> 1:45:42.040 Tom. I tell you know, Tom and I share everything. 1:45:42.040 --> 1:45:42.439 I tell him. 1:45:42.479 --> 1:45:44.479 I said, yeah, I sold out all my tour days 1:45:44.520 --> 1:45:46.479 and he was like, you're fucking serious. I was like, yeah, 1:45:46.479 --> 1:45:48.240 I sold out everything, all the all the dates roll 1:45:48.360 --> 1:45:51.200 at the end of this sold everything. And he was like, hum. 1:45:51.840 --> 1:45:58.639 So Tom spends sixty thousand dollars when I say, no problem, 1:45:58.680 --> 1:46:02.439 sell money. Make this video all right? 1:46:02.680 --> 1:46:04.640 I put this. I got to hear it. 1:46:06.920 --> 1:46:12.360 There's no music right now, hip pause. So a fucking 1:46:13.200 --> 1:46:15.840 two weeks before this video comes out, he says to 1:46:15.880 --> 1:46:18.719 me him, man, I want to change up our profile 1:46:18.840 --> 1:46:20.160 picture online. 1:46:20.280 --> 1:46:22.160 Is it cool? We're both gonna do this? Is it cool? 1:46:22.160 --> 1:46:24.719 If this guy romy shoots some pictures of your face, 1:46:24.760 --> 1:46:27.360 and I was like, yeah, sure, and he goes all right, cool. 1:46:27.360 --> 1:46:29.640 So I go out and I stand up to this 1:46:29.680 --> 1:46:31.360 thing and they don't even put a mike. They put 1:46:31.400 --> 1:46:32.960 a mic call me. It's not even connected to anything. 1:46:32.960 --> 1:46:35.840 I didn't even notice. And he goes all right, look sad, 1:46:35.880 --> 1:46:38.479 and I'm like and then like, look like you got stabbed. 1:46:38.479 --> 1:46:40.599 I'm like, oh, I do all. 1:46:40.400 --> 1:46:43.960 The fucking deep fake for this without knowing I was 1:46:43.960 --> 1:46:45.800 doing it for him, and I did all of that. 1:46:45.840 --> 1:46:48.080 I sat there for an hour doing all these faces, 1:46:48.240 --> 1:46:51.360 thinking we're doing promos for two bears, and then he 1:46:51.400 --> 1:46:52.400 fucking plays it for me. 1:46:52.479 --> 1:46:55.720 I go, you fucking kunt I go, that is me. 1:46:55.960 --> 1:47:01.960 I did all these like oh, and so that's me. 1:47:02.680 --> 1:47:05.880 It's someone else's body with my face on it. Sold 1:47:05.880 --> 1:47:11.880 out everything. He did not sold out everything everything immediately. 1:47:12.080 --> 1:47:14.400 Holy shit, dude, that's fucking hilarious. 1:47:14.479 --> 1:47:16.640 But it's like it's like that's when when you know, 1:47:17.360 --> 1:47:20.040 you know, obviously you know. When I was at that point, 1:47:20.040 --> 1:47:23.320 I remember I remember being like everything was it was. 1:47:23.360 --> 1:47:25.120 It cannibalized my life a little bit, but I was like, 1:47:25.120 --> 1:47:27.479 everything is this about this business? Everything is about this career, 1:47:27.520 --> 1:47:31.360 everything's about everything. I'm never turning it off. I'm only 1:47:31.400 --> 1:47:34.320 thinking about ideas and how can I make things better 1:47:34.400 --> 1:47:37.800 and focusing on my podcast. And I was doing it 1:47:37.840 --> 1:47:41.479 all myself too, making videos, editing videos, promo videos like 1:47:41.880 --> 1:47:43.960 I was exhausting to my daughters. I did this video, 1:47:44.360 --> 1:47:45.720 I'd like come up to him and be like I do, 1:47:45.760 --> 1:47:49.000 I'd sell I have this one video. I don't see 1:47:49.000 --> 1:47:51.280 if you can site type in Burt American flag, but 1:47:51.360 --> 1:47:53.439 I had. I came out. I mean, this is like 1:47:53.560 --> 1:47:56.160 right after school, like everyone stopped doing homework. George, I 1:47:56.160 --> 1:47:59.040 need you to operate a drone. Love, I need you 1:47:59.120 --> 1:48:04.040 to hold a air blower, Leanne. I need you to 1:48:04.400 --> 1:48:07.360 put the hose on Misted and then Georgia pulled the 1:48:07.439 --> 1:48:09.599 drone back and then rise up and then we'll put 1:48:09.640 --> 1:48:13.200 tour dates and and it. And my kids are like, 1:48:13.760 --> 1:48:14.720 are you fucking kidding me? 1:48:14.920 --> 1:48:16.160 That's fucking wild. 1:48:17.160 --> 1:48:19.920 It's an American fight. I mean, I just it was, 1:48:20.080 --> 1:48:22.439 but I was obsessed with it. And I think once 1:48:22.479 --> 1:48:25.400 you beat and that's not it, but once you become 1:48:25.439 --> 1:48:27.200 obsessed with it, I mean, it's the only way to succeed. 1:48:27.200 --> 1:48:28.559 I think you should have to be obsessed with it. 1:48:28.680 --> 1:48:30.280 Have to be everything in your life and that and 1:48:30.560 --> 1:48:32.800 either whether it's writing jokes or promoting tour dates or 1:48:33.040 --> 1:48:34.559 thinking about things that would pop. 1:48:34.600 --> 1:48:35.880 I think you've got to be obsessed with it. 1:48:35.920 --> 1:48:37.320 And if you're not, does your family life go when 1:48:37.320 --> 1:48:39.040 you're that obsessed with it? I don't know. 1:48:39.720 --> 1:48:41.599 It was kind of like it was good, I guess. 1:48:43.400 --> 1:48:45.400 I mean, I'm certain we pay. I'm certain I'm fucking 1:48:45.439 --> 1:48:48.080 paid for it. But like they were like there were 1:48:48.120 --> 1:48:49.960 times it was fun. Like I had to promote tour 1:48:50.040 --> 1:48:52.840 dates in Australia and so I got a big inflatable 1:48:52.880 --> 1:48:54.400 thing and I was like, I'll do a thing where 1:48:54.400 --> 1:48:56.519 I fly down the inflatable thing and I fall off 1:48:56.560 --> 1:48:59.280 and then and then uh, I'll kill a beer and 1:48:59.320 --> 1:49:01.599 all to have the kids going to Ozzy Auzzy Oi Oi. 1:49:01.920 --> 1:49:03.120 And I was like I did that and I sold 1:49:03.160 --> 1:49:05.680 out Australia, but like yeah, yeah, but it was like 1:49:05.720 --> 1:49:08.880 it was about coming out with promos constantly, like the 1:49:08.880 --> 1:49:11.360 body shots tour is this is a great one. This 1:49:11.400 --> 1:49:14.040 is at a fucking this is with all our families, 1:49:14.479 --> 1:49:16.400 we should be having dinner together. I put them all on, 1:49:16.560 --> 1:49:19.120 all the kids in my tour shirts, and then I 1:49:19.200 --> 1:49:21.840 just got on roller skates, my buddy, my wife's shooting 1:49:21.840 --> 1:49:22.679 it out of the back of a truck. 1:49:22.680 --> 1:49:31.920 My buddy, Stephen Prompkin's driving sold it out. 1:49:32.439 --> 1:49:34.880 And so but it's like, but imagine how what it's 1:49:34.880 --> 1:49:36.439 like to go to dinner with dad over your friend's 1:49:36.439 --> 1:49:38.120 house and I've got a speed on roller skates and 1:49:38.160 --> 1:49:40.400 I'm like, no, hey, everyone put on these shirts, get 1:49:40.439 --> 1:49:42.160 on your skateboards, get on your bikes, let's do it. 1:49:42.400 --> 1:49:43.280 And the kids loved it. 1:49:43.320 --> 1:49:44.840 The kids were I mean, the kids are always getting 1:49:45.240 --> 1:49:48.519 low key, pulling away from everybody too. They get on 1:49:48.520 --> 1:49:50.880 the skateboard, was next to you when it started, Yeah, 1:49:51.160 --> 1:49:51.720 getting high. 1:49:52.120 --> 1:49:54.120 So I but I was obsessed with it and I'm 1:49:54.120 --> 1:49:56.360 still obsessed with it, you know, Like we're going out 1:49:56.520 --> 1:49:58.320 I'm doing I haven't announced it. Yep, I'm doing Red 1:49:58.400 --> 1:50:00.200 Rocks again. I haven't announced so I guess I didn 1:50:00.200 --> 1:50:03.400 announce it right now, but uh yeah, and so and 1:50:03.479 --> 1:50:06.960 so I'm flying from Columbus on Sunday out to Red 1:50:07.000 --> 1:50:09.200 Rocks to shoot promos out at Red Rocks and then 1:50:09.240 --> 1:50:11.559 hanging out in Colorado and shooting some shit in Colorado. 1:50:11.760 --> 1:50:14.000 So they have promos to promote Red Rocks you know, 1:50:14.120 --> 1:50:16.720 it's like that's where my head's at, and it's like 1:50:16.760 --> 1:50:19.040 it's it. I remember feeling guilty because I was like, 1:50:19.040 --> 1:50:20.840 I'm always working. And I remember sitting on a plane 1:50:20.840 --> 1:50:23.000 next to a dad that was like, hey, bro, I'm 1:50:23.040 --> 1:50:25.360 in the military. I was Afghanistan for two fucking years. 1:50:25.640 --> 1:50:27.439 I think we're good. And I was like, oh yeah, 1:50:27.640 --> 1:50:30.080 certain dads just give up their life to fucking I mean, 1:50:30.080 --> 1:50:31.920 that's what you gotta do. You gotta work, you know. 1:50:32.120 --> 1:50:34.080 And I I'm cool with my kids and my wife 1:50:34.120 --> 1:50:36.519 were all cool. They get it, but their dad leaves 1:50:36.560 --> 1:50:38.080 for a month. I saw them the other night. I said, 1:50:39.280 --> 1:50:41.479 I'm out for a month. I love you guys, and 1:50:41.520 --> 1:50:43.280 they're like, I love you too. And you just go 1:50:43.360 --> 1:50:44.720 for a month and you're on the road, you're on tour, 1:50:44.760 --> 1:50:47.759 you're in a bus, you're partying. You fucking come home, 1:50:48.479 --> 1:50:52.519 and you get like, I'm come home. Maybe sometime within there, 1:50:52.560 --> 1:50:55.600 I'll go to fucking Portugal or Lithuania. 1:50:55.880 --> 1:50:58.320 Go take some guys on the trip o Jay then 1:50:58.720 --> 1:50:59.679 and then uh. 1:50:59.479 --> 1:51:01.759 Where's that New York. 1:51:03.720 --> 1:51:06.360 Boy? And then uh, you know, by the way, if 1:51:06.400 --> 1:51:07.920 we do this, if we do this and you guys 1:51:07.960 --> 1:51:09.680 go to you know, Big Cat's gonna be like. 1:51:09.680 --> 1:51:10.479 What the fuck, dude? 1:51:10.560 --> 1:51:15.120 Oh yeah, right now for real, Yeah, Cat, there's been 1:51:15.160 --> 1:51:17.719 a situation with Big Cat. There's a there's a group 1:51:17.800 --> 1:51:20.000 chat with me, Will and Big Cat in it, and 1:51:20.960 --> 1:51:22.479 I don't know how it really began, but wait. We 1:51:22.479 --> 1:51:24.360 were trying to sell like for the boys t shirts 1:51:24.360 --> 1:51:27.919 like Michigan and Nebraska Nebraska, and Michigan was playing Wisconsin, 1:51:27.960 --> 1:51:30.559 which is where Big Cat wins or loves, and I 1:51:30.600 --> 1:51:32.920 was like, hey, if Michigan wins, you have to buy 1:51:33.000 --> 1:51:35.120 like twenty of these shirts, something small you win. Tried 1:51:35.160 --> 1:51:38.000 to get Dave Portnoy to help promote mission shirts, and 1:51:38.120 --> 1:51:40.760 Dave went around. Yeah, I went around there, and we're 1:51:40.760 --> 1:51:42.320 trying to sell things that they're gonna make money on. 1:51:42.400 --> 1:51:43.840 David just did not respond to my tax. 1:51:43.960 --> 1:51:46.440 Dave's a Michian guy, but yeah, big Cat, he's Wisconsin. 1:51:46.479 --> 1:51:49.160 But I tried going and get Big Cat because Big 1:51:49.200 --> 1:51:51.599 Cat will respond like, yeah, Dave Will. 1:51:51.400 --> 1:51:54.080 Will play chess a lot better than me. So but 1:51:54.160 --> 1:51:56.080 I thought, if I can get one tweet from Dave, 1:51:56.240 --> 1:52:00.800 I'm gonna fucking sell these things out, no problem. So Wisconsin, 1:52:00.800 --> 1:52:03.320 Wisconsin gets donkeyed by Michigan, and so we're in this 1:52:03.360 --> 1:52:05.960 group chat now like hey, you gotta pay blah blah blah, 1:52:06.000 --> 1:52:08.080 and Big Cat decides in his mind, I'm no longer 1:52:08.120 --> 1:52:10.600 a part of the group chat. So he responds to 1:52:10.760 --> 1:52:13.519 Will being, hey, Will, will you tell Taylor that album? 1:52:13.520 --> 1:52:15.519 I'll buy the shirts. You know, I'm not happy we lost. 1:52:15.800 --> 1:52:17.720 I'm in the group chat, and so now I'm like 1:52:17.760 --> 1:52:19.840 trying to figure out a way to like be a 1:52:19.840 --> 1:52:22.800 part of the conversation. Yeah, be a part of the 1:52:22.800 --> 1:52:26.920 conversation while like he's just blatantly ignoring me. And I'll 1:52:26.960 --> 1:52:29.880 be like, hey, big Cat, can we're cool right or 1:52:29.880 --> 1:52:31.639 something whatever. I never said that, but like I would 1:52:31.680 --> 1:52:34.519 say something like that, and Bi Catt would be like, 1:52:34.560 --> 1:52:36.280 hey Will, I'm sure Taylor's wondering if for cool, Like 1:52:36.280 --> 1:52:37.800 we're definitely not, you know what I'm saying like that. 1:52:39.439 --> 1:52:41.960 On the side, Big Kevin taking screenshot by Hey Will, 1:52:41.960 --> 1:52:43.160 Taylor's trying to text me outside. 1:52:43.160 --> 1:52:44.560 I said that, yeah, because I would text him. On 1:52:44.600 --> 1:52:47.920 the side, if I pulled up my phone of just 1:52:48.240 --> 1:52:50.479 me and Big Cat, it would be me texting him 1:52:50.760 --> 1:52:52.880 and no responses because then he was screenshot and putt 1:52:52.880 --> 1:52:57.080 in the group chet Will. So we have Mike just 1:52:57.160 --> 1:52:59.639 Mike no longer Mike stud on the podcast and he's 1:52:59.680 --> 1:53:09.320 talking about yeah youah this there is some like overweight 1:53:09.400 --> 1:53:11.640 guy who's like a sports media guy. I don't know 1:53:11.680 --> 1:53:15.360 his name off no no so Will so Will chaps him. 1:53:15.400 --> 1:53:18.080 That's literally that's the clip. That's Lily the clip, and 1:53:18.120 --> 1:53:22.280 so big Cat makes this this fucking picture that's like 1:53:22.680 --> 1:53:25.479 obviously photoshop, like his head, Will's had in my head 1:53:25.479 --> 1:53:28.120 and it's like big Cat no longer friends with Will Compton, 1:53:28.560 --> 1:53:32.240 best friends with Lawan. Yeah, I'll never forget this. And 1:53:32.479 --> 1:53:35.040 he he texts me, He's like, hey, I think you 1:53:35.080 --> 1:53:36.519 and I it's like time for us to team up. 1:53:36.560 --> 1:53:39.519 Basically fuck Will, and so I hit him back. I go, hey, 1:53:39.520 --> 1:53:44.280 Will Bill tell big Cat, Yeah, tell Baked if you're worried, 1:53:44.560 --> 1:53:47.280 if he's upset with you that we're not cool, like 1:53:47.840 --> 1:53:49.479 where I don't want to be friends with him anymore, 1:53:49.520 --> 1:53:53.040 something like that. The last fucking two days, forty eight 1:53:53.040 --> 1:53:56.479 hours has been Big Cat doing so many things literally 1:53:56.479 --> 1:53:57.920 were it's me and Will just talking in the group 1:53:57.960 --> 1:54:00.599 chat without Big Cat. Now big Cat has talk about 1:54:00.600 --> 1:54:02.759 our day to day. Big Cat goes, I'll kill myself. 1:54:02.760 --> 1:54:05.200 If you guys keep doing this, we keep doing this. 1:54:05.640 --> 1:54:08.000 Big Cat texting goes, hey, this is Big Cat's son. 1:54:08.080 --> 1:54:12.559 What did I find my dad? Hey? Will explains, Will 1:54:12.600 --> 1:54:17.479 explains the Big Cat son, while the Big Cat's son 1:54:17.680 --> 1:54:21.240 responds with did you guys kill my dad? We keep 1:54:21.360 --> 1:54:25.639 going and then big Cat Big Cat goes Big Cat says, uh. 1:54:25.760 --> 1:54:28.040 He goes, hey, this is Big Cat's ghosts like, I 1:54:28.160 --> 1:54:29.600 just want you guys to know we're cool. I'm not 1:54:29.600 --> 1:54:33.040 gonna haunt you guys for eternity scurry like that. It's 1:54:33.080 --> 1:54:35.800 fucking hilarious, dude, it was hilarious. 1:54:35.840 --> 1:54:38.240 But what was the I ended up texting Taylor and 1:54:38.320 --> 1:54:40.320 we're all this is all in the group chat, and 1:54:40.360 --> 1:54:42.080 by the end of the night, I just text Taylor. 1:54:42.120 --> 1:54:44.000 He goes, did you guys kill my dad? Did you 1:54:44.040 --> 1:54:46.080 guys kill my dad? I'm not even three, Like Big 1:54:46.120 --> 1:54:48.440 Cat's playing like his son and I just text I 1:54:48.480 --> 1:54:50.360 go Taylor. I tried texting him. He's doing this thing 1:54:50.360 --> 1:54:52.879 where he acts like his two year old son is texting. 1:54:53.040 --> 1:54:54.680 I'm just gonna give him time. Dudes in a weird 1:54:54.680 --> 1:54:57.320 headspace right now, and he keeps trying to tag and 1:54:57.560 --> 1:55:03.160 because at the beginning, he goes, he goes Taylor, he goes, Taylor, 1:55:03.200 --> 1:55:04.320 I'd like to speak with you again. 1:55:04.400 --> 1:55:06.440 I think the titles turning. There's someone else on this 1:55:06.560 --> 1:55:06.920 chain that. 1:55:06.880 --> 1:55:09.360 I will be squeezing out old school big ten guys, 1:55:09.560 --> 1:55:11.839 none of the new expanse and shit back to our roots. 1:55:12.080 --> 1:55:13.040 That just quite interesting. 1:55:13.080 --> 1:55:14.680 And so that's when Taylor goes, Will, can you please 1:55:14.720 --> 1:55:16.080 tell Big Cat when you see him that if he's 1:55:16.080 --> 1:55:18.680 looking to fix our relationship after it comms today, I'm 1:55:18.720 --> 1:55:19.520 no longer interested. 1:55:19.680 --> 1:55:21.000 And then that's when the whole chain goes. 1:55:21.360 --> 1:55:24.080 Big Cat wakes up this morning, he's like, guys, apologies accepted, 1:55:24.600 --> 1:55:25.760 one team, one heartbeat. 1:55:26.400 --> 1:55:29.320 We're all crew now. So Will and I, Will and 1:55:29.320 --> 1:55:31.160 I have made the decision that Will and I are 1:55:31.160 --> 1:55:33.640 no longer texting each other like whatever, we're using our 1:55:33.640 --> 1:55:35.360 group chat with Big Cat, but we're seeing at North 1:55:35.400 --> 1:55:36.280 Big Cat in the whole time. 1:55:36.360 --> 1:55:37.400 Oh that's fucking great. 1:55:37.400 --> 1:55:39.240 So it's fucking been a hilarious. 1:55:39.840 --> 1:55:43.080 How much fun would it be to find out all 1:55:43.320 --> 1:55:47.720 the all the group chats with all the fucking different people, meaning, like, 1:55:48.120 --> 1:55:51.480 what's George Clooney's group chat? M Like, you know he's 1:55:51.520 --> 1:55:53.040 got an Ocean of eleven group chat. 1:55:53.080 --> 1:55:55.720 Oh, he's gotta have one, Yeah, probably called Ocean eleven. 1:55:55.840 --> 1:55:57.840 Ocean's eleven. Yeah, now it's probably. 1:55:57.520 --> 1:56:00.640 Something way cooler. Dude. They were in fucking Palm Springs 1:56:01.040 --> 1:56:04.320 or Joshua Tree and they did fucking Payoti And there's 1:56:04.360 --> 1:56:06.200 a cool name that they all fucking saw. 1:56:06.400 --> 1:56:08.960 Who do you think Tom Brady's group chats are him 1:56:09.080 --> 1:56:11.080 Gronk Edelman, him Gnkttleman. 1:56:11.640 --> 1:56:12.960 Off the top of my head, that would be it, 1:56:13.000 --> 1:56:15.760 I bet you, But I bet you there's another one 1:56:16.320 --> 1:56:21.800 with Tom and Rabel are Titans head coach? Yeah, and 1:56:22.600 --> 1:56:25.040 I don't know. I don't know who else would be 1:56:25.040 --> 1:56:25.680 in the chat. 1:56:25.960 --> 1:56:29.080 Manager says, gotta wrap up soon. Who's manager? 1:56:29.600 --> 1:56:33.800 Whoever? Your manager? What time is it? Oh? 1:56:33.840 --> 1:56:34.280 Man? Maybe? 1:56:34.440 --> 1:56:37.720 Holy shit, maybe I do have to do a show tonight. Wait, 1:56:37.720 --> 1:56:38.880 what's up a show? 1:56:38.920 --> 1:56:40.400 Seven seven o'clock? 1:56:40.480 --> 1:56:45.720 Yeah, I got the ryman like, that's fucking huge. Yeah, yeah, 1:56:45.720 --> 1:56:47.760 I gotta show in an hour forty seven minutes. 1:56:48.240 --> 1:56:51.600 I mean, I'm sure there's the same as sports. 1:56:51.640 --> 1:56:53.600 As you go, I'm ready for it. 1:56:54.360 --> 1:56:57.080 Yeah. No, And when you play sports, you're literally thinking yourself, 1:56:57.120 --> 1:56:58.640 what if this get Like, what if this happens. What 1:56:58.680 --> 1:57:01.520 if that happens, because it's not like I think the 1:57:01.520 --> 1:57:03.360 biggest difference is is like, you're not going you're going 1:57:03.400 --> 1:57:04.000 ast yourself. 1:57:04.080 --> 1:57:07.280 Well a picture of the Titans coach Mike Rabel. Yeah, 1:57:07.600 --> 1:57:08.480 it's I can look for. 1:57:08.440 --> 1:57:14.120 Him, Okay, oh cool, yeah, easy. 1:57:14.880 --> 1:57:17.840 Yeah, you'll be able to tell him right away. He's 1:57:17.840 --> 1:57:19.640 a little thicker. He's a little thicker now than he 1:57:19.680 --> 1:57:20.320 has in that photo. 1:57:20.400 --> 1:57:21.959 But apparently someone. 1:57:23.640 --> 1:57:25.920 Someone told me he's coming to the show, first show 1:57:25.920 --> 1:57:28.480 with the Rhyman and they're like his his his wife's 1:57:28.640 --> 1:57:31.160 a fan of yours and they're coming to. 1:57:31.520 --> 1:57:34.400 He uses his wife as a fan for everything. Yeah, 1:57:34.560 --> 1:57:36.640 he'll tell us that he he doesn't use Twitter. 1:57:37.000 --> 1:57:39.120 I wanted to tell him feel free to come backstage, 1:57:39.200 --> 1:57:41.720 but I don't, you know, I don't. Also, it's like 1:57:42.160 --> 1:57:44.440 maybe guys like that don't want to be noticed. They 1:57:44.480 --> 1:57:45.840 just want to just do something regular. 1:57:46.360 --> 1:57:49.760 No, he wants to be He wants he wants to. 1:57:49.800 --> 1:57:52.520 He wants you to somehow reach out and be like, hey, 1:57:52.560 --> 1:57:53.600 if you guys want to, if you want to come 1:57:53.600 --> 1:57:55.280 backstation and I would love to meet you guys. 1:57:55.080 --> 1:57:55.720 But it might be wrong. 1:57:59.280 --> 1:57:59.840 He'll be like. 1:58:00.040 --> 1:58:04.000 Coold baby he'll like text him, IV, Can you text him? 1:58:04.000 --> 1:58:06.480 I don't want to, but I will. 1:58:06.920 --> 1:58:08.440 If he's coming to my show, he can come back to. 1:58:10.720 --> 1:58:11.280 Let you know. 1:58:11.320 --> 1:58:12.720 By the way, I'd love if he wrote back, who 1:58:12.760 --> 1:58:16.360 the fuck's Burt, and like it's the offensive coordinator. Okay 1:58:16.720 --> 1:58:18.960 you A lot of offensive coordinators wanted us to let 1:58:19.000 --> 1:58:20.640 you know what that you can come backstation night. 1:58:20.720 --> 1:58:23.000 Bert wanted us to tell you to let you know. 1:58:23.000 --> 1:58:24.959 If he's coming to the show, come back stations. 1:58:24.720 --> 1:58:28.160 Show tonight, you can come backstage. But also he didn't 1:58:28.200 --> 1:58:34.400 want to, Okay, hold on, but also if you're coming 1:58:34.440 --> 1:58:35.640 to the show tonight. 1:58:36.760 --> 1:58:41.040 I hope he writes back, who's Burt. It's a'm as 1:58:41.080 --> 1:58:42.000 long as you're cool. 1:58:42.080 --> 1:58:42.400 He said. 1:58:42.440 --> 1:58:44.080 But also he didn't want us to give you his 1:58:44.160 --> 1:58:46.080 number because he keeps us stuff. 1:58:46.080 --> 1:58:50.240 Probably he'll know. 1:58:50.280 --> 1:58:53.280 Like we're fucking with it. He'll text us about something 1:58:53.360 --> 1:58:56.440 on Twitter all the time, really and he'll like like 1:58:56.480 --> 1:58:58.720 it's Jin his social media manager, like, oh gin, she 1:58:58.800 --> 1:59:00.640 shows me these tweets and he's fuck line. Like I 1:59:00.640 --> 1:59:03.200 sat with him in a meeting one time, and this 1:59:03.240 --> 1:59:05.680 motherfucker's just scrolling on Instagram being like, hey, check out this, 1:59:06.320 --> 1:59:08.280 Like it's it was during an offensive meeting. But the 1:59:08.400 --> 1:59:11.360 dude loves social media. He loves bantering with the boys. 1:59:11.800 --> 1:59:13.000 He's all time. You'd love him. 1:59:13.280 --> 1:59:16.960 Look, this is him chirping me on fucking on social media. 1:59:18.640 --> 1:59:19.520 That's fucking great. 1:59:19.760 --> 1:59:23.920 He's hilarious. He's hilarious, but he's also like he comes 1:59:23.920 --> 1:59:27.000 from blood on his chirps. Yeah, like when you're a guy. 1:59:27.080 --> 1:59:28.600 Let's say we all got super close to three of 1:59:28.680 --> 1:59:30.400 us and eventually be like, oh, you're a piece of shit. No, 1:59:30.440 --> 1:59:31.640 you're a piece of shit, and we'd like joke and 1:59:31.680 --> 1:59:34.120 like be able to jab deeper with Rabel because there's 1:59:34.160 --> 1:59:36.960 like an authoritative figure with him. He's my boss, or 1:59:37.200 --> 1:59:40.080 was Will's boss. When we start tripping him, he comes 1:59:40.080 --> 1:59:42.240 in with a haymaker and you can't one up. Eventually, 1:59:42.280 --> 1:59:46.000 eventually you can't do anything about it. Yeah, yeah, like, look. 1:59:45.920 --> 1:59:48.120 The fuck another one one of the courts I've always 1:59:48.120 --> 1:59:49.720 remember from Coach Rabel was the great ones to make 1:59:49.760 --> 1:59:51.000 it look easy and then he fucking I hope you 1:59:51.000 --> 1:59:52.080 didn't think I was talking about. 1:59:51.880 --> 1:59:53.840 You when I said that. Oh I love this guy, 1:59:54.480 --> 1:59:55.120 I texted him. 1:59:55.160 --> 1:59:57.680 He does go for the throat though, you gotta come correct. 1:59:57.680 --> 2:00:00.720 It's much better being his uh, his buddy now that 2:00:00.800 --> 2:00:01.920 it is this fucking player. 2:00:02.520 --> 2:00:06.920 Yeah yeah, you two are boys, yeah Will, Will and 2:00:07.040 --> 2:00:11.360 Raves are blocking boys. Yeah yeah, absolutely, they've gotten real close. 2:00:12.080 --> 2:00:14.040 I'll tell you what, dude, this has been has been 2:00:14.640 --> 2:00:17.280 when when we when we found out you were coming 2:00:17.280 --> 2:00:18.840 on the pod, when we found you were coming to 2:00:18.840 --> 2:00:21.600 the pot, were like, fuck yeah, dude for crushes coming 2:00:21.600 --> 2:00:23.600 on the pot. This gonna be fucking awesome. Today we 2:00:23.640 --> 2:00:25.720 called each other, Hey, big day, Big day for the boys. 2:00:25.720 --> 2:00:30.880 We've been tweeting today, Hey, big day for the boys. Yeah. 2:00:34.040 --> 2:00:34.560 Yeah right. 2:00:35.160 --> 2:00:37.440 And there's obviously a whole lot of expectations, but there's 2:00:37.480 --> 2:00:39.040 one point I'm sure you had it in the middle 2:00:39.040 --> 2:00:40.640 of the day where you're like, man, I hope it 2:00:40.680 --> 2:00:42.560 goes as well as we think it's gonna go. And 2:00:42.560 --> 2:00:47.160 it truly exceeded expectations. It was we have this thing 2:00:47.160 --> 2:00:53.480 called Mount Bushmore. Yeah, it's Mount bus More. Couldn't wait more? 2:00:53.800 --> 2:00:58.360 Yeah yeah bus Moore. So anyway, this is definitely one 2:00:58.400 --> 2:00:59.160 of those episodes. 2:00:59.200 --> 2:01:00.960 Oh thank you. It's definitely one of those. 2:01:01.080 --> 2:01:05.480 Like, uh, you're just so personable, yeah, stories and like 2:01:05.560 --> 2:01:09.080 your perspective and like sounds gay, but like being where 2:01:09.120 --> 2:01:13.320 your feet are, like appreciating, appreciating, like where you came from, 2:01:13.360 --> 2:01:15.520 and like understanding, like yeah, I'm gonna soak up all 2:01:15.520 --> 2:01:15.880 these moms. 2:01:15.920 --> 2:01:17.280 I don't know, I really fuck with your perspective. 2:01:17.280 --> 2:01:18.560 I appreciate it, man, Thank you. Yeah. 2:01:18.840 --> 2:01:21.080 I feel like I keep saying. My thing I say 2:01:21.160 --> 2:01:23.280 is like make hey while the sun shines, and as 2:01:23.320 --> 2:01:25.440 I go, I'm healthy right now, I got my blood 2:01:25.440 --> 2:01:25.920 work back. 2:01:26.240 --> 2:01:26.720 I'm good. 2:01:26.760 --> 2:01:29.240 It's the first thing you say when you walk in alcoholic. Yeah. 2:01:29.320 --> 2:01:30.600 Oh you think, bro? 2:01:30.680 --> 2:01:32.760 Did you see his take on cost Oh yeah, no, 2:01:32.800 --> 2:01:34.800 I'll tell you what some conversations. 2:01:34.240 --> 2:01:36.800 That was that one take, that beautiful thing you talked 2:01:36.800 --> 2:01:37.839 about drinking. 2:01:37.920 --> 2:01:39.920 I was telling I told this to someone the other day, 2:01:39.960 --> 2:01:41.040 Sunday conversation, that. 2:01:41.720 --> 2:01:45.800 It was one take. But I it's so funny. Do 2:01:45.880 --> 2:01:49.480 you guys know who Patty Pimblington is. Yeah, yeah, the fighter, Yeah, 2:01:49.520 --> 2:01:52.120 Patty the Batty. And I made that speech and it 2:01:52.200 --> 2:01:55.480 started like people started sending it around. I was like, God, 2:01:55.600 --> 2:01:58.280 damn it, I called my shot. You know, it's like 2:01:58.280 --> 2:02:00.760 when he goes scouses, don't get in allucked out, you 2:02:01.320 --> 2:02:03.480 all anyone's waiting face for him to get knocked out. 2:02:04.200 --> 2:02:05.880 Come on, what are you gonna say? Do you know 2:02:05.880 --> 2:02:08.320 they're gonna go? It turns out Scouser's getting knocked out. 2:02:08.640 --> 2:02:11.080 As soon as I did this, I will never stop partying. 2:02:11.200 --> 2:02:13.000 And then all of a sudden, I'm like today because 2:02:13.000 --> 2:02:14.560 I'm getting ready to go to the doctor, I'm sitting there going 2:02:14.640 --> 2:02:15.520 tod I just do my. 2:02:15.720 --> 2:02:17.560 Scousers don't get knocked out. 2:02:17.680 --> 2:02:21.640 Yeah, I'm never quit partying. Imagine who is stay healthy enough? 2:02:21.640 --> 2:02:23.280 And then all of a sudden, like your liver's failing, 2:02:23.360 --> 2:02:28.320 I'm like, get knocked out. It's crazy too. 2:02:28.320 --> 2:02:30.200 Like you were talking about that Sunday conversation, the way 2:02:30.240 --> 2:02:33.720 he painted beautifully like it was beautiful and just up 2:02:33.760 --> 2:02:36.920 to what he said, the fan, the fans story the 2:02:37.000 --> 2:02:37.560 same thing. 2:02:37.920 --> 2:02:40.520 Just an elite storyteller. Honestly, we can literally do a 2:02:40.520 --> 2:02:42.480 cut up like that, by the way, like Sunday the 2:02:42.480 --> 2:02:45.440 Conversation did. When you're talking about being a fan waking up, dude, 2:02:45.480 --> 2:02:46.920 somebody times left you get to go. I'll tell you 2:02:46.960 --> 2:02:47.720 what I'm saying. 2:02:47.880 --> 2:02:50.560 It's I believe this is the thing that people listening 2:02:50.600 --> 2:02:52.480 to this podcast will really relate to. 2:02:52.640 --> 2:02:54.400 Is that because I'm the same as they are. 2:02:54.600 --> 2:02:58.320 It's just like, dude, like if if you guys, if 2:02:58.720 --> 2:03:01.000 like remember when McAfee went on to Monday Night Football 2:03:01.440 --> 2:03:03.920 and you were like, fuck yeah, our guy made it. 2:03:04.280 --> 2:03:07.360 Our guy made it, Like fuck yeah. Like those that's 2:03:07.480 --> 2:03:09.120 I mean, that's the thing that people, you know, the 2:03:09.160 --> 2:03:11.400 same thing with drinking is like, not everyone's gonna be 2:03:11.440 --> 2:03:15.600 Rogan and fucking or David Goggins and run or Cam 2:03:15.640 --> 2:03:19.760 Haynes or fucking Jesse Sweets or Ceciler. They're not gonna 2:03:19.760 --> 2:03:22.800 be these guys, but they're definitely gonna have drinks on Friday. 2:03:23.360 --> 2:03:25.400 I need something to fire them up for. And I 2:03:25.640 --> 2:03:28.240 didn't I didn't mean to say that that way. By 2:03:28.280 --> 2:03:29.480 he came out and I was like. 2:03:29.920 --> 2:03:32.800 Beautiful, Oh yeah, he's what almosis, Oh yeah, I It's 2:03:32.800 --> 2:03:35.040 gonna be one of those kind of days. It's so 2:03:35.160 --> 2:03:38.640 fucking awesome, great fucking podcasts. Longest podcast we've ever done, 2:03:38.640 --> 2:03:41.640 by far, for real, oh by far. Subscribe, subscribe. 2:03:41.720 --> 2:03:44.600 The boys come out, just come out probably next week. 2:03:46.720 --> 2:03:50.880 Hey, do mean favor Go to fully loaded festival dot com. 2:03:50.880 --> 2:03:51.840 I'm putting on a tour. 2:03:52.720 --> 2:03:56.520 It's gonna be uh, it's gonna be about twelve comics 2:03:56.560 --> 2:03:59.960 per show. David heel Mark, Norman, Big jay O, Christine, 2:04:00.080 --> 2:04:07.000 Shane Gillis, Joey Diaz, Nicky Glazer, Taylor, Tomlinson, Fortune Femester. 2:04:07.840 --> 2:04:08.640 We're adding more. 2:04:08.760 --> 2:04:12.880 We're doing minor league stadiums, arenas and amphitheaters for two 2:04:12.920 --> 2:04:15.720 weeks in June. The middle two weeks in June go 2:04:15.760 --> 2:04:18.200 to Fully Loaded Festival. It's going to be huge. We're 2:04:18.240 --> 2:04:20.920 also I mean, the offer is going to be out 2:04:20.920 --> 2:04:22.440 to if people want to come out to podcasts. We 2:04:22.440 --> 2:04:24.280 have so much talent out there that I was going 2:04:24.320 --> 2:04:26.720 to say, you know, I think the trash Tuesday girls 2:04:26.760 --> 2:04:28.920 are going to come out for like a day and 2:04:29.440 --> 2:04:31.280 bang out a bunch of podcasts. So if you guys 2:04:31.280 --> 2:04:34.000 want to come out and do some podcasts, I mean, legit. 2:04:34.040 --> 2:04:35.960 The talent that's out there, and I know how much 2:04:36.000 --> 2:04:38.879 it costs. It's hundreds and hundreds of thousands of dollars. 2:04:38.880 --> 2:04:42.880 So put the festival together. Myself, I'm paying everyone. You 2:04:42.880 --> 2:04:45.640 guys come out, pick a date. We're gonna do a 2:04:45.640 --> 2:04:49.200 big one and we're doing South Bend. Shane Gillis is 2:04:49.200 --> 2:04:51.680 obsessed with Notre Dame, so we're doing a whole day 2:04:51.720 --> 2:04:54.400 for him at Notre Dame. And so if you guys 2:04:54.400 --> 2:04:56.080 want to come out to any of the dates, let 2:04:56.120 --> 2:04:56.400 me know. 2:04:56.600 --> 2:04:57.880 Do you know when the dates exactly are? 2:04:58.000 --> 2:05:05.240 Yeah, you can July eighteenth, June eighteenth, June eighteenth, and 2:05:05.280 --> 2:05:09.440 then uh sing goode mayo im at the Greek and 2:05:09.480 --> 2:05:10.760 then I'll haven't announced. 2:05:10.760 --> 2:05:12.960 I announced, I already announced red Rocks. 2:05:13.000 --> 2:05:13.960 I just don't know what day it is. 2:05:14.200 --> 2:05:16.680 All right, go to burberbert dot com to get your tickets, everybody, 2:05:16.680 --> 2:05:17.560 burburber dot com. 2:05:17.640 --> 2:05:19.160 Yeah, Burburbert, burburbert dot com. 2:05:19.400 --> 2:05:22.240 Fucking go man. Fuck yea to Sandy CLASTI standing out 2:05:22.280 --> 2:05:24.640 of standing. Subscribe