Speaker 1: Previously on does this murder make me look gay?
Speaker 2: I'm DJ Connelly.
Speaker 3: I was heading back to the city when my car
Speaker 3: broke down.
Speaker 4: I wanted Vandy to mentor me, show me to ropes,
Speaker 4: teach a bloke to fish and all that. Vandy refused.
Speaker 5: All right, Henry spill, I wish I'd killed him.
Speaker 6: I would have killed him, but I didn't.
Speaker 7: Kelly.
Speaker 8: Is that Kelly?
Speaker 9: Ugh?
Speaker 7: Poor Kelly, what a way to go.
Speaker 2: On the bright side, getting choked out was the most
Speaker 2: erotic thing to ever happen to him. And I bet
Speaker 2: that dying a eunuch virgin guarantees won a place in heaven,
Speaker 2: in which case, send me straight to hell. But there
Speaker 2: was something nobody knew. When Kelly's lifeless, lube covered body
Speaker 2: was discovered across the hall, another murder was taking place
Speaker 2: at the very same time. Remember teach our half frozen
Speaker 2: klondike in the green bedroom. After girdling, she decided to
Speaker 2: warm up with the soothing everything shower. What's in everything shower?
Speaker 7: You ask?
Speaker 2: Is it where one eats and everything bagel in the shower? No, no,
Speaker 2: fool and everything shower is what the kids do these
Speaker 2: days to kill time. They spend hours beneath the shower head, washing, dreaming,
Speaker 2: listening to post Malone, Oh, and masturbating there's a lot
Speaker 2: of that, and circling back to my everything bagel reference.
Speaker 2: They eat, so I suppose that yes, one could eat
Speaker 2: in everything bagel while taking in everything shower. TJ, being
Speaker 2: a simple stage hand queer, had never been around so
Speaker 2: many expensive skin products like the one stocked in her bathroom.
Speaker 2: But while she was lathering up and singing a legally
Speaker 2: a loud amount of another Melissa Etheridge tune, she never
Speaker 2: heard the lock on her door click open.
Speaker 10: Come to my window, wave Aline a Moon.
Speaker 2: There was a killer in her room who waited and
Speaker 2: waited and waited for TJ to emerge, but the shower
Speaker 2: never seemed to end. In fact, the killer was still waiting.
Speaker 2: When screams pierced the night of the Monroe Estate, Kelly's
Speaker 2: body had been found. Kelly the killer knew this moment
Speaker 2: amidst the chaos, was the time to strike. While the
Speaker 2: water dripped over her lesbian skin, TJ's soon to be
Speaker 2: murderer tiptoed into the en suite, where they ripped open
Speaker 2: the shower curtain with a devilish grin. It was a
Speaker 2: scene right out of Psycho, only TJ was no Janet Lee,
Speaker 2: Her bmi was far too high and her scream was
Speaker 2: more holly weird than Hollywood. And was the killer as
Speaker 2: undeniably fuckable as Anthony Perkins. I can't tell you that yet.
Speaker 2: What I can say is he was not a stranger.
Speaker 11: I promise I won't tell anyone.
Speaker 12: We know each other.
Speaker 3: You don't have to.
Speaker 7: But it was too late.
Speaker 12: In a house on him lives a kay and his
Speaker 12: friends want him dead.
Speaker 7: Ride why someone wants to.
Speaker 12: Kill him even though it's wrong?
Speaker 7: Since the world is matter wrong? Man is borne.
Speaker 12: It's very closely with yourris. See if you can guess
Speaker 12: switch one of these queens?
Speaker 7: Maybe is the killer? Who is the killer? Who didn't?
Speaker 7: Who wanted? Who crept in?
Speaker 11: Is? Who it was? It?
Speaker 4: Me?
Speaker 7: Who could it be? Who did it? They're dropping like flies?
Speaker 7: Who didn't?
Speaker 13: These guys are like guys?
Speaker 7: Who did it?
Speaker 6: Who was it?
Speaker 11: What?
Speaker 9: Me?
Speaker 7: Wud it? Does this word? Make me?
Speaker 3: Look?
Speaker 11: Now?
Speaker 1: What's where you're going?
Speaker 7: I am you're the one?
Speaker 5: Oh Henry? His legs are dragging.
Speaker 6: Kelly's heavier than he looks. Plus being dead, that's a
Speaker 6: bit of a. Did Kelly just fart from the beyond? Jesus,
Speaker 6: he certainly doesn't smell better in dead.
Speaker 5: Oh God, Wilmer, you dropped Kelly's legs.
Speaker 11: His dead man fart scared me. Bless, He's slippery from
Speaker 11: all that lube.
Speaker 7: How much?
Speaker 5: Five him, mate, just a Vandy's bedroom. We'll put him
Speaker 5: with the others.
Speaker 9: This fucker is like a You must.
Speaker 14: Slip and slide.
Speaker 5: My bad, my bad.
Speaker 8: Oh, okay, here we are. Heave him onto the bed
Speaker 8: one two three.
Speaker 4: A trio of dead bodies, Vandy, Tush and Kinky Kelly.
Speaker 4: And we haven't even been here twenty four hours.
Speaker 5: This is dark.
Speaker 9: I agree. It's far worse than anything that ever happened
Speaker 9: in Sondheim's dungeon, allegedly.
Speaker 6: I don't know about you, but I no longer feel safe.
Speaker 1: This is just occurring to you now, Wilmer.
Speaker 6: What happened to your gun?
Speaker 3: James took it.
Speaker 5: I put it away for safe keeping.
Speaker 6: Well, j James, maybe you should unput it away. I'll
Speaker 6: hold on to it.
Speaker 9: Screw that, Henry, What if you're the killer? Why should
Speaker 9: we give.
Speaker 6: You a gun? Because it would make me feel better?
Speaker 4: All hold on to the gun or played a cop
Speaker 4: once in the Poor No NYPD the D stood for dick.
Speaker 11: Yeah.
Speaker 9: No.
Speaker 1: If anyone should have the gun, it should be me.
Speaker 1: I'm the one who brought it.
Speaker 5: This is exactly why I hit it.
Speaker 14: I agree with James. I do not want a serial
Speaker 14: killer running around my house with a firearm. This is
Speaker 14: not Texas or Florida.
Speaker 5: Or Wilmer Good.
Speaker 14: Is that your stomach?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm pretty hungry.
Speaker 7: I could eat.
Speaker 5: How can you think about dinner at a time.
Speaker 9: Like this easily?
Speaker 6: I can. I'm personally not hungry, but I support the group.
Speaker 9: Mooney, would you like some Moon?
Speaker 5: Where are you?
Speaker 4: I thought Moon was holding Kelly's.
Speaker 3: I'm here, I'm here. I was upset about tush and
Speaker 3: took some of my sleeping pills.
Speaker 7: Who and I woke up.
Speaker 3: All of you were gone.
Speaker 9: Mooney, Kelly's dead?
Speaker 3: I see that? Is she covered in lube?
Speaker 8: Strawberry lube?
Speaker 3: Ugh, I prefer coconut. At least Kelly died surrounded by
Speaker 3: something he loved.
Speaker 4: You slept through everything.
Speaker 5: I have to say, Moon, your absence is a little suspicious.
Speaker 3: I have a sleeping disorder, and this weekend hasn't exactly
Speaker 3: been relaxing. The only saving grace is that I was
Speaker 3: able to switch room side enough to face the street.
Speaker 3: I can't stand the sound of cars.
Speaker 5: You switched rooms with?
Speaker 8: Who?
Speaker 5: Back off, James.
Speaker 3: Moon wouldn't hurt a fly, No, I would. I hate flies.
Speaker 4: I had a pet fly once kept a bowl of
Speaker 4: maple syrup on a counter for him to drink.
Speaker 5: Called him Fred.
Speaker 4: One day I came home when he was gone. My
Speaker 4: roommate left the window open.
Speaker 14: Poor Fred, there there?
Speaker 7: Why don't you rest your head.
Speaker 14: In my lab?
Speaker 4: Oo?
Speaker 5: Okay out, I'm sorry, that was my boner.
Speaker 3: I'm happy to make dinner. I can whip up something
Speaker 3: simple with whatever's downstairs.
Speaker 5: You cook, Do I cook?
Speaker 2: No, dear listener, Moon did not cook. Despite her best intentions,
Speaker 2: Moon put together an awful dinner uncooked pasta, topped with
Speaker 2: natella and shredded cheese. Henry had never been so happy
Speaker 2: to be on a diet. The rest attempted to eat
Speaker 2: the concoction, but mostly pushed it around awkwardly on their plates.
Speaker 1: I can understand why someone wanted Daddy dead, and I
Speaker 1: can sort of understand why someone wanted to pushed it.
Speaker 1: And Kelly was deeply annoying. But who had a motive.
Speaker 2: To murder all three of them.
Speaker 6: Maybe it's like that I got a Christie movie and
Speaker 6: then there were none. I watched it on brick box.
Speaker 6: It's no Harry.
Speaker 14: Potter, But what is that, Agatha Christie? You know it
Speaker 14: was a book long before it was a movie, Henry.
Speaker 14: I remember the day it was published. Everybody was up
Speaker 14: in arms about the plot twists.
Speaker 5: You remember when it was published. That was like in
Speaker 5: the thirties.
Speaker 14: I mean, uh, I remember reading about it being published.
Speaker 6: There's something so compelling about the story. Strangers brought to
Speaker 6: a mysterious house trapped in a storm, all of whom
Speaker 6: are hiding secrets and sins, and they die one by one,
Speaker 6: sort of like us.
Speaker 3: What oh that scared me.
Speaker 9: It's just the wind, Mooney.
Speaker 4: Poor angel Elane's fairy out there in the freezing cold.
Speaker 14: I've been hoping that creature would die for years, but
Speaker 14: she keeps on kicking.
Speaker 3: Uh.
Speaker 6: James, you've been talking to everyone collecting clues. Surely you
Speaker 6: must have a suspicion about the murderer's identity.
Speaker 8: You want to know the truth.
Speaker 5: I got nothing.
Speaker 8: Oh, some detective, you are reminder. I'm not actually a detective.
Speaker 8: I am helping out as a friend.
Speaker 5: That's rich.
Speaker 14: You're a friend of mine. You're the caretaker of my estate.
Speaker 3: My estate, Reginald Wilmer.
Speaker 14: Please, the only thing you inherited from your father is
Speaker 14: a narrow dick and a confusing wasteline.
Speaker 10: That makes no sense. He's not my biological father. He
Speaker 10: adopted me like Daddy Warbucks, doesn't any I.
Speaker 6: Played Daddy Warbucks back in the day at a newdist camp.
Speaker 6: I asked them to change the character's name to Daddy Warballs,
Speaker 6: and they did. All the orphans were played by naked
Speaker 6: old men.
Speaker 8: I'll never forget it.
Speaker 3: I have an idea who the murderer is.
Speaker 7: You do sure?
Speaker 3: I think it was you, Reginald's pratto. Why it's always
Speaker 3: the husband I saw gone girl spouses murder each other.
Speaker 4: That's not what happens.
Speaker 3: No, I didn't see all of it, only the naked
Speaker 3: ben Afflexien.
Speaker 9: If we're going off movies, I think Vandy killed himself
Speaker 9: like in Knives Out.
Speaker 6: Or he has a secret twin like in the Memory
Speaker 6: Keeper's Daughter.
Speaker 14: Or it's like house at the end of the street
Speaker 14: where a scorned neighbor is responsible. That would be you,
Speaker 14: isn't it Henry a scorned neighbor, and isn't that it's
Speaker 14: homophobic personally?
Speaker 4: I love Unfaithful with Diane Lane, so I made a
Speaker 4: porn version called on Eightful, where eight blokes fucked while
Speaker 4: sharing an april and Unfaithful played in a background super meta.
Speaker 4: It's always the secret lover of the partner, who does it?
Speaker 3: That means you're fingering yourself.
Speaker 8: Oh there, never mind, something's weighing on me, weighing on
Speaker 8: me hard. That's her key is still missing. Someone stole it,
Speaker 8: and I'm guessing that's how they got into Kelly's room.
Speaker 8: Here's an idea. We'll search everyone and whoever has it?
Speaker 2: What are you talking about?
Speaker 9: It's right there on the floor.
Speaker 2: A stun James looked at his feet. Sure enough, there
Speaker 2: was the key, camouflaged by the carpet. James bent down
Speaker 2: and picked it up, staring at the thin brass object
Speaker 2: with a baffled expression.
Speaker 8: I don't whoever stole it must have placed it here
Speaker 8: to avoid detection.
Speaker 14: Or you dropped the key, which means anyone could have
Speaker 14: picked it up and gotten into Kelly's room.
Speaker 7: We're lucky, we're alive.
Speaker 5: No, I didn't drop.
Speaker 3: It, seems like you did.
Speaker 5: I'd never be that careless.
Speaker 9: Seems like you were.
Speaker 6: I'll say it, James should no longer be in charge
Speaker 6: of the key.
Speaker 5: Seriously, who do you suggest holds onto it instead?
Speaker 6: I think we should throw it away. That way no
Speaker 6: one has access.
Speaker 3: Ah.
Speaker 8: I like that idea.
Speaker 7: But where.
Speaker 2: Down the toilet it went? My HouseGuests stared as the
Speaker 2: swirling water took the master key into the pipes and
Speaker 2: into wherever those pipes lead.
Speaker 3: Now what do we do?
Speaker 7: Easy?
Speaker 5: Find Vandy's will? Reginald? Where did he keep it? He
Speaker 5: must have a safe, no idea, he was private, secretive.
Speaker 8: Well you're gonna help me. Look, everyone else, stay here,
Speaker 8: and I mean it this time.
Speaker 5: Do not leave. If you do, I'll have you arrested.
Speaker 5: Citizen arrested.
Speaker 7: God, that's hot, guys.
Speaker 2: TJ is still upstairs.
Speaker 1: Shouldn't someone bring her dinner?
Speaker 14: Lesbians don't need food like gay men do. They're fine
Speaker 14: with a lunar bar in the morning and some almonds
Speaker 14: for a snack.
Speaker 6: Why do you hate lesbians so much?
Speaker 14: Hates a strong word. I just don't see a reason
Speaker 14: for their existence.
Speaker 1: But if there were no lesbians, who would foster all
Speaker 1: the stray cats?
Speaker 3: Or chop wood in the Hudson Valley.
Speaker 6: Dray hat this conversation is extremely homeophobic.
Speaker 3: I'll do it. I'll bring TJ dinner now, I'll do it.
Speaker 3: But I'm a very hospitable host. I know what lesbian's like.
Speaker 3: I've been to Cherry Grove.
Speaker 4: I'm sick of everyone here and I want to make
Speaker 4: a new friend. So hard to meet people as an adult.
Speaker 14: Really is it's lonely in the top. And I don't
Speaker 14: mean on top, because I'm not a top, but.
Speaker 2: Nonetheless it's lonely on the bottom. Reginald and James searched
Speaker 2: high and low for my will, and what I mean
Speaker 2: by that is James was feeling low and Reginald was
Speaker 2: getting high. But despite searching nearly every room of the house,
Speaker 2: and my house has a lot of rooms, they were
Speaker 2: as empty handed as Jeremy o'harris on Tony Knight.
Speaker 14: We have looked everywhere and there's not a trace of
Speaker 14: this will. Vandy. I'm done with this shit, Vandy. You
Speaker 14: can suck eggs wherever you are.
Speaker 8: We can't give up. Whoever he left his money to
Speaker 8: has the strongest motive for killing. Besides, we haven't searched everywhere.
Speaker 8: There's still Kelly's bedroom.
Speaker 14: Which is covered in loop.
Speaker 5: Oh, and your art studio.
Speaker 14: There's nothing in my studio except paint and canvases. There's
Speaker 14: certainly not any drugs or spells or anything at all supernatural.
Speaker 8: Gosh, okay, here's Kelly's bedroom. Keep your eyes open and
Speaker 8: I guess let's take off our shoes. Not even Sam
Speaker 8: Smith's parties are looped up like this. It's so spicky, sticky.
Speaker 14: And somehow it seems there's even more than there was before.
Speaker 7: Oh, it's everywhere.
Speaker 14: Nobody wants it, like chest and Buddha.
Speaker 5: Jeedge will will?
Speaker 8: Where would I hide a will or a safe under
Speaker 8: the bed? No, what about the nightstand? Not there either.
Speaker 14: Bandy would never stash his will in such an obvious place.
Speaker 14: I'll tell you what. It would be, tucked away with
Speaker 14: an obscure clue necessary to find it. Oh, Vandy loved games,
Speaker 14: and look where it got him. What was that?
Speaker 5: A scream from down the hall?
Speaker 2: TJ, Reginald, and James raced to TJ's room. Inside they
Speaker 2: found Jacques hands pressed to his cheeks in horror, like
Speaker 2: an image from the depths of Edward Gory's mind. A
Speaker 2: tray of food was splattered on the floor.
Speaker 5: Jock, what's wrong?
Speaker 7: Do you need to fuck someone to calm down? I
Speaker 7: volunteer his.
Speaker 2: Tribute blood Nik Dad James looked in the shower to
Speaker 2: find TJ's limp body covered in blood, stabbed and cut
Speaker 2: to death.
Speaker 8: I can't believe this another murder, Reginald John. Let's move
Speaker 8: it to Vandy's bedroom with the others.
Speaker 14: Quick question. I've never really seen a woman's nude body
Speaker 14: live and in person. Where where would you grab it?
Speaker 14: There's not a handle, right?
Speaker 4: Do we have to touch that woman breast? What about
Speaker 4: the vagina's I'm a gold star guy. I can't get
Speaker 4: it downgrade this lay in life.
Speaker 5: I don't know what to say to either of you.
Speaker 8: Jack, grab a towel from the bathroom.
Speaker 5: Good, all right, lay it down on the floor. Let's
Speaker 5: put her on the towel and roll her up like
Speaker 5: a taco.
Speaker 8: Now, lift and roll and roll and paula, hold on,
Speaker 8: hold on, Shock.
Speaker 5: How did you get in here through the door? But
Speaker 5: I locked it and then threw away the key, so
Speaker 5: the door should have still been locked.
Speaker 4: Nope, the door was unlocked when I arrived. I was
Speaker 4: old in TJ's dinner knock with my elbow and then
Speaker 4: I said, like DJ dinner, but there was no reply,
Speaker 4: so I turned a knob and I found her like this.
Speaker 5: You know what this means?
Speaker 14: Someone else dislikes lesbians as much as I do.
Speaker 7: It.
Speaker 8: No, it means I was right earlier. I didn't drop
Speaker 8: the master key. Someone stole it, used it to enter
Speaker 8: TJ's room and killed her.
Speaker 7: Quick.
Speaker 5: Let's tell the others.
Speaker 2: Back in the living room, James was surprised to see
Speaker 2: everyone sitting calmly. Wilma and Moon were playing chess, Henry
Speaker 2: was not eating, and Polly was at the grand piano.
Speaker 8: Hello, Gaze, Why didn't any of you run upstairs when
Speaker 8: Jacques screamed?
Speaker 9: You said to stay here or you'd have us arrested.
Speaker 9: So that's what we did.
Speaker 5: Oh.
Speaker 8: This weekend has been worse for queer representation than Ryan
Speaker 8: Murphy's Hollywood limited series on Netflix. Promising premise, but was
Speaker 8: ruined by lackluster writing, a meaningless plot, and too many
Speaker 8: straight actors playing gay.
Speaker 6: Don't get me started. Representation matters kids my whole life.
Speaker 6: I thought I could never be an interior designer because
Speaker 6: so many of them are women or straight men. Don't
Speaker 6: people know gays were born to rearrange furniture and select
Speaker 6: paint colors. How dare Britas steal our thunder? Every day
Speaker 6: I have to fight to keep the art of interior
Speaker 6: design queer as queer can be. And I'm tired, folks, efy,
Speaker 6: I'm tied.
Speaker 3: I'm tired too.
Speaker 11: As a cute, rich nepo baby, I thought it was
Speaker 11: my right not to work, but then Daddy was all.
Speaker 1: Get a job and make your own way, and I
Speaker 1: was all why the art.
Speaker 11: Of being gay is built off of the idea that
Speaker 11: some men make money and others reap benefits and spend
Speaker 11: their days at the gym and having white wine and
Speaker 11: fancy salad for lunch.
Speaker 10: If I have to start working to support myself, I
Speaker 10: as well as her fucking.
Speaker 4: Bussy, it's hard for me too.
Speaker 15: Nobody wants to watch gay porn with men who are
Speaker 15: actually gay. There's so much bloody self loaded and it
Speaker 15: makes my brain plead, which is why I have to
Speaker 15: pretend to be straight in order to fuck dudes on screen,
Speaker 15: when really I actually love it. This is why I
Speaker 15: want to work behind the scenes to let actual gays
Speaker 15: open their mouths and butts for other guys to enjoy
Speaker 15: in the privacy of their own homes.
Speaker 14: Please, Honey, I've always been an outcast. I suppose that's
Speaker 14: why I became a gay witch.
Speaker 3: That's not something I personally relate to. But I've been
Speaker 3: shunned by our community, shunned. I say, I'm a drag queen. Honey.
Speaker 3: I used to be roommates with RuPaul back when she
Speaker 3: only had one wig. But the world doesn't want men
Speaker 3: in dresses anymore unless they're starring in lack cluster productions
Speaker 3: of TUTSI missus doubtfire some like it blah on Broadway.
Speaker 3: That's why I have to do my own thing. I
Speaker 3: mean our own thing, Polly and me, Me and you forever, Mooney.
Speaker 3: Straight men can put on lipstick and a dress and
Speaker 3: win an oscar, but me, I'm singing for pennies outside
Speaker 3: the Duplex every Tuesday. If our queer leaders won't stand
Speaker 3: their ground and say, you know what, no, I'm not
Speaker 3: going to cast Terry Styles and the policeman, And not
Speaker 3: because he can't act, which he can't, but because he
Speaker 3: doesn't suck dick, then who will?
Speaker 7: Who will?
Speaker 8: I think about this all the time, an entire generation
Speaker 8: of gay men are gone, and what do we have instead?
Speaker 8: Way too many homos who are only concerned about themselves.
Speaker 8: Where's the mentorship, the generosity? The book imprints dedicated to
Speaker 8: publishing queer works, the theater is dedicated to lifting a
Speaker 8: queer voices. And don't even get me started about gay
Speaker 8: writers or gay directors or gay writer directors who won't
Speaker 8: hire gay actors or gay producers with multimillion overall deals
Speaker 8: who do nothing besides renovate mansions and it's ten fashion
Speaker 8: shows and have children via surrogate raised solely by nannies.
Speaker 8: Shame on you, and shame on us for supporting them
Speaker 8: instead of real queer artists like Fandy, who died in obscurity,
Speaker 8: poisoned in some passage way.
Speaker 7: I will not rest until I find his killer.
Speaker 6: Do you hear me?
Speaker 7: I will not rest. He will not have died in vain.
Speaker 8: I don't know what came over me, but that felt good.
Speaker 5: I bet it did.
Speaker 2: Look it's dark outside.
Speaker 4: I can barely see anything with all that rain and snow.
Speaker 3: Holley, I'm scared.
Speaker 9: I'll protect you Moon forever.
Speaker 8: Everyone go to your rooms, barricade your doors. Surely the
Speaker 8: snow will stop by morning, or the power will come back.
Speaker 5: We just have to last another night.
Speaker 2: And so, dear listener, everyone went upstairs unlocked their doors
Speaker 2: as best they could, hoping they would wake up in
Speaker 2: the morning and be well alive. Everyone except for James,
Speaker 2: that is, there was still an itch he just couldn't scratch.
Speaker 2: So he went to my study, where the audio controls
Speaker 2: were set up for all the hidden microphones.
Speaker 8: Let's see if I can find anything from earlier, anything
Speaker 8: that might help figure out who killed Kelly and TJ.
Speaker 8: This was TJ's room. I can't hear anything with the shower.
Speaker 8: There's the living room.
Speaker 7: You can't move the night there, moon.
Speaker 10: Haven't you ever played chess before?
Speaker 16: Is that what this is called? I thought these are
Speaker 16: pieces of candy. No, definitely not candy. There goes one
Speaker 16: of my crowns.
Speaker 5: That's not it. What about.
Speaker 7: Somebody? Please?
Speaker 8: Well that's fucking weird. I don't know what that is. Huh.
Speaker 8: Here Kelly's room. Hmm, the mic must have gotten covered
Speaker 8: with lube. It's completely dead. I should check it out again. Maybe,
Speaker 8: just maybe I missed something.
Speaker 2: James returned to Kelly's lube covered room for a second look.
Speaker 2: Careful not to wake the others and alert them to
Speaker 2: his plan.
Speaker 5: If TJ's room was unlocked, the murderer must have used
Speaker 5: the key to get in. But why wasn't Kelly's door
Speaker 5: unlocked too? We had to break it down.
Speaker 8: The only thing that makes sense is there's another way
Speaker 8: into Kelly's room, Another secret passage. Here we are, let's see,
Speaker 8: here's the microphone. Yep, completely kicked with lube. What's that?
Speaker 5: It looks like waves of strawberry lube pooled at my feet.
Speaker 8: Gross. Hold on, the lube is streaming along a floor
Speaker 8: over to that wall. Only instead of pooling at the
Speaker 8: base board, it's slipping through a crack underneath. Gay gasp,
Speaker 8: another hidden passageway. Jessica Stain, I was right.
Speaker 5: Here goes nothing.
Speaker 2: James walked through the passageway. There was no light whatsoever,
Speaker 2: and he felt completely trapped. Is this what it's like
Speaker 2: for Olympic diver Tom Daily in his marriage? He wondered.
Speaker 2: Then James hit the end. He pushed on the wall
Speaker 2: and emerged.
Speaker 5: Into Reginald's bedroom.
Speaker 7: Before j could.
Speaker 2: Move, Reginald entered from his bathroom in a gorgeous kimono.
Speaker 2: I bought him on our trip to Japan.
Speaker 14: Wait, a customer, heck, never mind, why are you in
Speaker 14: my bootoir?
Speaker 5: I got lost looking for the circuit breaker. Yeah, I
Speaker 5: was gonna try and fix the power.
Speaker 14: I know why you're here. You came here to fuck. Oh, no,
Speaker 14: to screw, to diddle, my dumpling, no turkey, my lurky pickle.
Speaker 7: My dickle.
Speaker 5: I don't know what that means.
Speaker 7: You've been watching me, wanting me.
Speaker 14: The sexual tension between us is off the charts, is it?
Speaker 2: Let's make love first, though, I want to like my candles.
Speaker 5: Perhaps you'd be open to a little bit of prayer.
Speaker 14: Not religious, Oh neither am I I'm talking about some
Speaker 14: devil worship.
Speaker 8: How did all those candles light at once? Are they electronic?
Speaker 12: Oh?
Speaker 14: Step into mine?
Speaker 2: Pentagram?
Speaker 5: Is that a drum?
Speaker 14: A little one?
Speaker 13: Yes? Clinic clinic, clinic, clinic, Peter Thomas, Row, Peter Thomas Raw, pologicals.
Speaker 5: Whatever you're doing, stop it right now.
Speaker 7: Piologic, melanches laber demo. Can you hear me? Camo? Can
Speaker 7: you hear me? Devil? Can you hear me? Who is that?
Speaker 3: God?
Speaker 7: Who the fuck is Johnny hor here? James? Wait? Wait,
Speaker 7: I can teach you things, nasty things, stop. Let me
Speaker 7: be the Ony Sullivant, dear Helen Yellow.
Speaker 2: But James didn't want to be his Helen Killer, so
Speaker 2: he ran and ran and ran until he found himself
Speaker 2: back in my study, where he closed the door and.
Speaker 5: Blocked it with a leather chair. How could I have
Speaker 5: been so blocked?
Speaker 8: The gay killer has been staring into my gay eyes
Speaker 8: this entire time.
Speaker 7: It's gay, Reginald.
Speaker 2: Meanwhile, in the library, one of my guests decided to strike.
Speaker 2: They broke into my hidden safe, found my will and
Speaker 2: burned it to.
Speaker 7: A Chris.
Speaker 10: Next time on Does this murder make me look gay?
Speaker 2: We won sure it could be a doctor, Oh something believable.
Speaker 6: Midnight time for Daddy's medicine.
Speaker 3: Shall I do the chorus once more?
Speaker 8: Dog Stall, I'm in the Monroe Estate and I just
Speaker 8: caught a murderer.
Speaker 7: Yes, I'll hold.
Speaker 17: Does this murder make me look gay? Stars Michael Ury
Speaker 17: as James Wilson, Douglas Sills as Reginald Divine, Robin de
Speaker 17: Jesus as Wilmer Munroe, Sienne Jackson as Jacques Saint Cox,
Speaker 17: Sean Patrick Doyle as Madame Moon, Brad Oscar as Tush
Speaker 17: von Munch, Nathan Lee Graham as Henry Jacobs, Frankie Grande
Speaker 17: as Kelly Raymore and Flanagan, Seth Radetsky as Polly Barker,
Speaker 17: Leah Delaria as TJ featuring Kate McKinnon as Angela Lansferry
Speaker 17: with Leah Salonga as herself and Jonathan Freeman as Vandy
Speaker 17: Jeremiah Monroe the Third. Additional performances by Ryan Steele, Malory Portnoy,
Speaker 17: Emily Lynn Nacho tem Buonting written and directed by Ted
Speaker 17: Mallower Executive producer Ted Mallow. Executive producers for Ninth Planet
Speaker 17: Audio Elizabeth Baquitt and Jimmy Miller. Hank Wittard served as
Speaker 17: story editor. Original score composed by Peter Lherman. Original score
Speaker 17: produced and mixed by Alex Bonoff. Theme song performed by
Speaker 17: Ted Mallour, written by Ted Mallower and Peter Lherman. Piano
Speaker 17: accompaniment for Madame Moon by Jacob Yates. Casting by Adam Caldwell,
Speaker 17: Karen Cassel, and Rachel Hoffman at Telsey and Company. Audio
Speaker 17: post production by One Thousand Birds principal recording, dialogue, editing,
Speaker 17: sound design and mixing by Torren Geller, Andrew Tracy and
Speaker 17: Haley Livingston Audio Post Executive producers Gwen Frailing and Kiara mcnight.
Speaker 17: Production coordinators Hannah Dickinson, Gillian Langanelli, Isabella Danzi and Rose
Speaker 17: kelso Key. Art by Ben Wiseman, Production accounting by Dill
Speaker 17: pret Singh. Special thanks to Jordan Serf, Daniella Fetterman, Morgan Gould,
Speaker 17: Eric Harper, Aaron Junkin, Chelsea Creps, Will O'Donnell, Don Saltzman,
Speaker 17: Michael Stearns and Murder Make Me Look Gay is a
Speaker 17: production of Ninth Planet Audio in association with iHeart Podcasts.
Speaker 17: This podcast was recorded under a SAG after a collective
Speaker 17: bargaining agreement.
Speaker 2: Has gone on overlanding rentro I don't know, I know no.
Speaker 9: Ninth Planet Audio cap con We're overlanding, You're over landing.
Speaker 7: Over