Speaker 1: And the fact that like ballroom dancers are wearing those
Speaker 1: and they're dancing backwards and for in high heels. That's
Speaker 1: a banana gram thought.
Speaker 2: It's nuts.
Speaker 3: Women are strong. I've always said it. You have always
Speaker 3: said that. I've always said, I've argued with you a
Speaker 3: few times. You've always said it said. I've said let
Speaker 3: them loose. I say, don't lower the rim, put them
Speaker 3: in heels and raise it up.
Speaker 2: I think they haven't tapped into their true potential. They're like,
Speaker 2: go h, they just need the right trigger.
Speaker 4: Get them super Saiyans. Bears are racist.
Speaker 5: The money.
Speaker 3: Turning stuff can't tell me.
Speaker 2: Last Christmas, I gave you my heart and the very next.
Speaker 3: Day you gave it away.
Speaker 2: There it is. There it is, Ladies and gentlemen. Welcome,
Speaker 2: gentiles and little mama's alike to another phenomenal episode of
Speaker 2: My Mama Told Me.
Speaker 3: The podcast where we dive deep into the pockets of
Speaker 3: black conspiracy.
Speaker 2: Theory and we finally worked to prove that the BPM,
Speaker 2: the beats per minute of the Cupid shovel are engineered
Speaker 2: at a specific frequency that is meant to enter the
Speaker 2: black brain and create order in the black community. Casper
Speaker 2: He wasn't just giving us a hit. He was giving
Speaker 2: us organization. Thank you for your work, sir. We miss
Speaker 2: you every day, alrightp godfort not forgotten, God for but
Speaker 2: not forgotten. And I don't know that I know his
Speaker 2: real name.
Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't know his face.
Speaker 2: I knew he had a cangle. Oh, I know old
Speaker 2: Nigga n.
Speaker 3: Kangle, who I am always inclined to listen to.
Speaker 2: He was a real He dressed I think through the
Speaker 2: whole of his life like we dressed during that era
Speaker 2: where people got dressed up in the club.
Speaker 3: Oh the sweater veg.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he would like keep a blazer and a cago on,
Speaker 2: but jeans.
Speaker 3: Can I say this is embarrassing? I was maybe the
Speaker 3: brokest I had been in my adult life at that point.
Speaker 3: I did not participate in the business casual in the club.
Speaker 2: You know what, history is gonna shine nicely on you
Speaker 2: because of that. Oh that's the good way you look
Speaker 2: at it, you know what I mean? Like I did,
Speaker 2: I was wearing bow ties. Oh, you seem like I
Speaker 2: was in a bad waddy. I was buying clothes and
Speaker 2: being like because I was a teacher at the gyme. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it was like I could wear these to school into
Speaker 2: the club, and that's a bad situation.
Speaker 3: That's never if that age, if you're wearing your work
Speaker 3: close out, it's a problem, dude.
Speaker 2: It was how I designed it, oh.
Speaker 3: Man, because I'm not gonna lie, like there weren't a
Speaker 3: couple of days I left Target, just took the name
Speaker 3: tag off to a party.
Speaker 2: I don't love it.
Speaker 3: I don't love it, but like, yeah, that's never a
Speaker 3: good situation.
Speaker 1: You guys got the factor the dress code in Remember,
Speaker 1: it was a different dress that's sure. That's sure, especially
Speaker 1: at black clubs, direct response to like the Saggy Jean's
Speaker 1: big T shirt era jackets. Yeah, where everybody looked like
Speaker 1: a runner and the wire. Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: And a lot of clubs pushed back on that with
Speaker 1: their no hats with logos on on that kind of
Speaker 1: like coded language.
Speaker 3: It was.
Speaker 2: It was a strict dress code at the time.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 2: And now I think most places are pretty like if
Speaker 2: you look good, you can come in. But but there
Speaker 2: was a strict dress code where it was like you
Speaker 2: cannot have on anything that even resembles clothes that we
Speaker 2: consider like ethnic urban whatever the fuck it is the
Speaker 2: rubber shoes.
Speaker 3: Sold shoes used to piss me off. It was crazy
Speaker 3: because that's like, of all the things that I'm not
Speaker 3: gonna get hard, sold shoes is the one that I'm
Speaker 3: not gonna bro.
Speaker 2: We all had on flat bottoms.
Speaker 1: That's crazy, crazy, Yeah, but I knew cast that had
Speaker 1: a backup pair of like nicer khakis, nicer shoes in case,
Speaker 1: because it would ruin your night if fo The homies
Speaker 1: got in and they were like those are those are
Speaker 1: sweatpants not jeans? You're like, no, I look at them.
Speaker 1: A fashion argument with the bouncer, like you're not getting that.
Speaker 5: You mean that dude in a black T shirt? Yeah, Yeah,
Speaker 5: he's not gonna get it. This is just like fashion innovation.
Speaker 5: Our guests today, you're already hearing from him. He We're
Speaker 5: so happy he's here. We're in Denver, We're at dude
Speaker 5: i DK Studios, the the finest establishment we've ever been
Speaker 5: at in Denver. I would say, we've never been anywhere else,
Speaker 5: but this is the best.
Speaker 3: Yeah, this is too. I shot my special on you.
Speaker 2: Shot your special here? Yeah, and it seems impossible.
Speaker 3: Is this beanie crazy?
Speaker 4: You look crazy?
Speaker 3: You look gorge man, it's like a little guy, cool beanie.
Speaker 3: When you said I had a beanie, I was like, okay,
Speaker 3: and then it was like smaller than I'm used to.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, No, it's not you didn't do anything. This
Speaker 3: was like because of the Santa. We had a whole
Speaker 3: debacle before. Our guess today has nothing to do with
Speaker 3: any of this. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2: I just he's surely been a victim.
Speaker 1: Staring at the beanie because because you can't tell how
Speaker 1: big they are, and then you go to tug down
Speaker 1: and pull it down over your ears and it gets
Speaker 1: no give, and you're like, I gotta commit to this.
Speaker 1: But that's like you need a tough to hair beanie
Speaker 1: and we don't have that.
Speaker 3: Oh so this is not good.
Speaker 1: No, it's a good look. You just got to commit
Speaker 1: to it. It works with the with the jacket, old school.
Speaker 3: Toss it to me.
Speaker 2: It was lighter.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I was already like, yeah, this doesn't have
Speaker 3: to wait.
Speaker 2: This doesn't feel like.
Speaker 3: I'm used to a forty five. Gave me a thirty eight.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, man, it's okay.
Speaker 2: I think you're doing fine, and I'm so happy that
Speaker 2: our guest is there not wearing any shitty clothing, you
Speaker 2: look great.
Speaker 1: Paint on my pants like a concerned dad. This podcast,
Speaker 1: which I am so like, Yeah, shout out.
Speaker 2: He's like Jesus, a person I'm a huge fan of.
Speaker 2: You're a huge fan of. You know him from Comedy Central,
Speaker 2: and you know I'm from his work on FX. You
Speaker 2: know I'm from his work on the goddamn News. You
Speaker 2: do the news sometimes.
Speaker 1: I used to that show has been canceled. Okay, well yeah,
Speaker 1: well I did the News seven years.
Speaker 4: Man.
Speaker 1: You know you in this business, day, in this business,
Speaker 1: it's just like that was a great run. Yeah something else.
Speaker 2: Now you've done it all and it all is amazing.
Speaker 2: And more importantly, you're an amazing comedian. And we're so
Speaker 2: happy he's here with us. Give it up for Al Jackson, everybody.
Speaker 1: Oh do we have to say give it up? And
Speaker 1: we all know each other and there's no one here.
Speaker 2: We usually press a button. Oh, and then there's like
Speaker 2: a sound effect that would follow it. And and I
Speaker 2: didn't keep that didn't account when I said give it up.
Speaker 1: So I still appreciate it. Yeah, thank you, I'll take it.
Speaker 1: And there are there were times started my comedy career
Speaker 1: in South Florida and Miami, and it was a different
Speaker 1: world for stand up in that like doing black rooms
Speaker 1: early in your career when you weren't good anyway. They
Speaker 1: sometimes you would just walk into a nightclub Thursday, it's ladies' night.
Speaker 1: No one knows their stand up, no one knows, and
Speaker 1: then they just stopped the music, trick daddy going that's it. Hey,
Speaker 1: we got some comedians here, and just the intros would
Speaker 1: just all right, y'all. Now you know we don't boo here,
Speaker 1: you know, all right, so we're gonna show him some respect.
Speaker 1: I'm like, god damn, Like, but if you if I
Speaker 1: didn't book him, but be respect, I'm like, just bring me,
Speaker 1: you know. It's like just just please just bring me up.
Speaker 2: You would do better pulling the cord and just letting
Speaker 2: me talk. Yeah, then freshest seeing this with like, look,
Speaker 2: I've never met this boy in my life. It scares
Speaker 2: me that he's here. But we got to be respectful.
Speaker 3: Also, there's no joke I can tell that's better than
Speaker 3: the slipping slide all stars.
Speaker 1: Oh man, you know what I mean? What a period
Speaker 1: of hip hop?
Speaker 2: Come take you to the house.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're from you're from Florida from Cleveland. I went
Speaker 1: down to Florida for grad school and then start I
Speaker 1: taught middle school. Like you do you teach middle school?
Speaker 1: I taught high school. Yeah, I taught middle school for
Speaker 1: five years and started doing open mics at night. But yeah,
Speaker 1: so I started my career in South Florida. But I'm
Speaker 1: from Cleveland.
Speaker 2: But you were there when the trick Daddy rained Supreme.
Speaker 3: That seems like one of the eras of the world.
Speaker 1: It was just it was the last, I feel like,
Speaker 1: period of time where the world was like the wild
Speaker 1: wild West. Like the apartment complex I was in was
Speaker 1: a place where those people don't exist anymore because now
Speaker 1: those people have been fired and like going and now
Speaker 1: they've been replaced with twenty seven year olds that are
Speaker 1: serious about their career. Maintenance men smoking blunts walking down
Speaker 1: the hallway. You go down to the office because your
Speaker 1: sink isn't working, and the woman just tells you, well,
Speaker 1: what the fuck do you want me to do about that?
Speaker 1: To your face, like there's no Yeah, I mean just
Speaker 1: it was. It was a wild time in life, you know,
Speaker 1: and I think it was. It was good for me.
Speaker 1: And I wonder if there's like a part of everybody
Speaker 1: that wasn't alive and kind of an adult at that
Speaker 1: period that is trying to get back to just a
Speaker 1: look worth not even It's so, you know, you're even
Speaker 1: if you're in Vegas, your wife is like, why are
Speaker 1: you still at the ARI? I'm looking at your location.
Speaker 1: You know, it's like it's hard to just Vegas used
Speaker 1: to be just a place where you could just go
Speaker 1: and be a dirt bag coke booze strippers and then
Speaker 1: come back and assume your normal life again and just
Speaker 1: like have that outlet.
Speaker 2: There is no there's no dirtbag release. There's no what
Speaker 2: happens in anywhere, you know what I mean. Like it
Speaker 2: it's everything is documented and if it isn't documented, it
Speaker 2: could be documented. And in that way it forces people
Speaker 2: to never release fully into like oh I'm just a scum,
Speaker 2: I'm just scummed for a little while.
Speaker 3: Now, the problem is they funnel it into YouTube comments, yeah,
Speaker 3: you know what I mean, and like places on the
Speaker 3: Internet where it doesn't feel good to release, you know
Speaker 3: what I mean. But it's like, if you could just
Speaker 3: go to Vegas once a year, kill a prostitute with
Speaker 3: your boys, maybe you don't have to be so mean
Speaker 3: to these female comedians on YouTube.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what's missing is a dead sex worker.
Speaker 3: That's obviously going crazy. But I do, I do, I
Speaker 3: do think that that, like maybe you need to be
Speaker 3: able to go out and get nuts. Like I went
Speaker 3: to New Orleans just recently and it was just not
Speaker 3: it's just the tone of it feels like it shifted
Speaker 3: a little bit. Even on Bourbon Street really yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, or they're just people taking video of themselves. I
Speaker 1: feel like there's a there needs to be a place
Speaker 1: where you know that you're not gonna be videoed. And
Speaker 1: that's even at strip clubs. Even when who was at
Speaker 1: John Moran out here in Denver, Oh yeah, he had
Speaker 1: he had the strap with him at the strip club.
Speaker 1: Not great, but that's not our business, no, and it
Speaker 1: affected his career. And it's just like athletes can't go
Speaker 1: to the strip club. You're twenty two, you know.
Speaker 3: Twenty two and I make millions of dollars and I
Speaker 3: can't party with the naked woman and a gun.
Speaker 2: And those strippers weren't scared, no, you know what I mean,
Speaker 2: Like whatever whatever he was doing with that gun, and again,
Speaker 2: not not my version of a great time. But like,
Speaker 2: whatever he was doing, he made it clear with everybody
Speaker 2: around him, this is okay.
Speaker 3: No, they could they thought in sorry sources say they
Speaker 3: thought he was being corny. They weren't like, yeah, he's
Speaker 3: gonna shoot us. No, it was like, why are him
Speaker 3: and his boys all hanging out with their shirts off
Speaker 3: not talking to us?
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're next to a target.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, that's the thing, bro. People need to know
Speaker 3: that about that is that it is next to a target. WHOA,
Speaker 3: here's a parking lot, what's a target?
Speaker 2: Whoa?
Speaker 3: And a yes, anything you need on that block, which
Speaker 3: is pretty cool. But yeah, it wasn't like yeah.
Speaker 1: It's just it's a it's a greater problem where just
Speaker 1: like I think that I was able to, like when
Speaker 1: I decided to stop drinking, chill out and just be
Speaker 1: a normal person, I got all that out of me.
Speaker 1: And it was a lot in there. It was a lot.
Speaker 1: I was a wild dude, and now I'm just like
Speaker 1: I don't need to be there. I'm good. I know
Speaker 1: they having fun, but like I've seen it kind of
Speaker 1: manifest some of my friends my age, I'm forty seven,
Speaker 1: where they did the right thing straight through college, straight
Speaker 1: through graduate school, got the job, housewife, perfect life, and
Speaker 1: they're like, do you want to go to a beach
Speaker 1: party in Vake. No, they're twenty six year olds, Like
Speaker 1: you look like a silent partner here. Yeah, they'll look
Speaker 1: like you should be mixing it up, but they're still
Speaker 1: trying to get their their twenty seven year old selves back.
Speaker 1: So I don't know, I'm glad I got that out.
Speaker 2: I feel closer probably to what they were in that
Speaker 2: I don't know that I got like all my rocks
Speaker 2: off before I got married and settled into a life,
Speaker 2: and I do know now more than ever that like, oh,
Speaker 2: I'm just never going to have it, Like there's no
Speaker 2: version where I get to go party on the beach
Speaker 2: with a bunch of bad bitches and pretend like that's
Speaker 2: my life again.
Speaker 1: Right, it just isn't, you.
Speaker 3: Know what I mean.
Speaker 2: And that's cool. Like I love my family, I love
Speaker 2: the life that I built. But you just have to
Speaker 2: settle into the fact that, like them days, them days
Speaker 2: were available, you didn't access them quite as much as
Speaker 2: you should have. And you'll live with that, you know
Speaker 2: what I mean. You'll have to say in different ways,
Speaker 2: but it ain't happening with the bad bitches on the beach.
Speaker 3: I was just gonna say, do you think you want
Speaker 3: it more in theory than you do in practice? But
Speaker 3: that's just saying, of course you want it in practice.
Speaker 2: I don't know if you do. I don't know it
Speaker 2: one day like a day.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean in theory, but I think in the
Speaker 1: fantasies that we all have about like whatever scenario that
Speaker 1: you want to paint, whether it's you and six models
Speaker 1: in a penthouse wherever I was. I did this old
Speaker 1: school hip hop show and they're playing jay Z and
Speaker 1: he at that line, I got six model chicks, six
Speaker 1: bottles of Chris and I was thinking, like the owl
Speaker 1: now would hate to be at the bar with six
Speaker 1: models and like just trying to like wrangle him to
Speaker 1: go and be like, yo, where she put her card down,
Speaker 1: My card is down? She did know they you paid yours.
Speaker 1: I would be so frustrat because I'm old now. But
Speaker 1: like I did that and now you want to go
Speaker 1: to Yeah. And I wonder if dudes, when they do
Speaker 1: their fantasy, take their personality into that fantasy.
Speaker 2: I think that's often the problem, right is, And it's
Speaker 2: something I think I was aware of even at a
Speaker 2: younger age was like I would watch the dudes who
Speaker 2: were really like saucing with women and really like going
Speaker 2: crazy out there, and I watched how they talk to
Speaker 2: people and how they like moved with people, and I
Speaker 2: knew I didn't have that in me.
Speaker 3: That is you will learn that first time you go
Speaker 3: to a night club and you're like, oh, that's not
Speaker 3: what I'm doing.
Speaker 2: And that's the problem. It's not that I didn't want
Speaker 2: to do it, Yeah, you know what I mean, I
Speaker 2: just didn't have it. No, And I knew even now, like,
Speaker 2: even with my resources and whatever, I'm gonna be around
Speaker 2: six batties and I'm not gonna talk to him like
Speaker 2: a man that gets six batties.
Speaker 3: You're trying to interject stand up comedy into the commerce.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna fuck around and bring up
Speaker 2: attack on Titan, and then it's ruined.
Speaker 3: That's true. That's true because I have had myself in
Speaker 3: bad bitch situations where I was not converting very nerves,
Speaker 3: and then that feels even worse than the idea. That's
Speaker 3: why it happened is a bad feeling, that's a low
Speaker 3: where you're like I got the I got in if
Speaker 3: you didn't go, you can sleep.
Speaker 2: If you went and you bombed, you awake, you feel
Speaker 2: that that's a tough night, damn.
Speaker 1: But also their personalities might not Like we could hang
Speaker 1: out in any scenario, and I feel like it would
Speaker 1: be funny serious at some points, but just like interactive
Speaker 1: because of the way are the way we talk to
Speaker 1: each other. But a model, for the most part is
Speaker 1: probably not used to comedic banter. And and that's not
Speaker 1: a shot against models, but the people that they interact
Speaker 1: with are people with yachts and the people that are
Speaker 1: short with them, like be ready at nine the chap
Speaker 1: will pick you up on the roof and she's like, okay,
Speaker 1: they're not ready for like David's witty banter to be.
Speaker 3: Funny for the back end of the night. When you
Speaker 3: find out I'm sad.
Speaker 1: You think you first meant to cry in front of me,
Speaker 1: I'm fair.
Speaker 2: Well, we're glad you've changed your ways. We're glad you're
Speaker 2: here with us today. On our most Christian episode, I
Speaker 2: would say, yeah, Christmas, it's our holiday episode. We're excited
Speaker 2: to have you here. Al And you came to us
Speaker 2: with a conspiracy. You came to us with I would
Speaker 2: say a denser conspiracy than we're going to articulate it
Speaker 2: as but we're excited to hear you fully unpack this thing.
Speaker 2: It's it's it's I think gonna evolve as you explain it.
Speaker 2: But you basically said, my mama told me Quanza is
Speaker 2: on the come up. Yes, tell us everything you.
Speaker 1: My relationship up with Kwansa has been slight to non
Speaker 1: existent most of my life. My mom was a very
Speaker 1: progressive black woman, like I always said, like she she
Speaker 1: had us eating kinoa like in eighty when no one
Speaker 1: knew like health food store, Like same kind of store
Speaker 1: that has like carrot juice, you know, like one of
Speaker 1: them co ops. Were you like, why it smells weird?
Speaker 1: It smells like raw vegetables, radishes.
Speaker 2: Why do I have to go to the bad Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah right, It's like my mom was on that grinding
Speaker 1: her own coffee bean. She's like when everybody's going like
Speaker 1: yuppie big cell phone. My mom was just very like
Speaker 1: of progressive, and so she introduced kwanza. But like introducing
Speaker 1: Kwanza in nineteen eighty six to a couple of black
Speaker 1: kids in Cleveland, it's like, wait, one gift and no
Speaker 1: one knows what I'm talking about. I don't know how
Speaker 1: to say it, and I won't say it like it Kwanza.
Speaker 1: There was no place, there was no fertile ground for
Speaker 1: it to grow. But as I look at my kids,
Speaker 1: who are I can't barely call them kids anymore seventeen,
Speaker 1: sixteen to ten, and how they react to not only Christmas,
Speaker 1: but Halloween Thanksgiving to a lesser extent. Kids don't care
Speaker 1: about their Halloween candy. They don't care about Christmas. Because
Speaker 1: before the Internet, if you wanted something, you throw hints
Speaker 1: all year, I want this, I want this dirt mini
Speaker 1: dirt bike, and you say January, March, November, throwing it
Speaker 1: out to Santa. Now you could just get it. And
Speaker 1: so the immediacy my kids get up on Christmas morning
Speaker 1: like a hungover dad, like that'd be off like nine,
Speaker 1: like we were up at four third getting yell, go
Speaker 1: back to bed, parents and wrapping gifts down there, you know.
Speaker 1: So the idea of Christmas and the immediacy of the
Speaker 1: excitement of what they got is gone. It does not exist. Interesting,
Speaker 1: And I look at these kids now, and that just
Speaker 1: on this own is very creepy. But I look at
Speaker 1: these like girls. My dumb. I look at.
Speaker 2: These kids there they like.
Speaker 1: But no, it's like they are incredibly emotionally articulate. My
Speaker 1: daughter and her friends and the way they talk to
Speaker 1: each other and they're like something, we'll just get on
Speaker 1: a zoom call and we'll give each other positive affirmations.
Speaker 3: I'm like, what, bro, how old is she seventeen? But
Speaker 3: I know twenty years older. I want my friends to
Speaker 3: do that.
Speaker 1: Can you imagine? Just like, let me be let me
Speaker 1: just call it Dave, just be like, you were really
Speaker 1: good today.
Speaker 2: Brothers, you're doing great.
Speaker 1: You're inspired, and a lot of people coordinated. We are
Speaker 1: all calling at the same time on purpose. And my
Speaker 1: greater point to that is that they are a lot
Speaker 1: more they're they're going to be a lot less interested
Speaker 1: in celebrating a holiday like Christmas where there's not a
Speaker 1: lot of unless it's a very religious thing for you,
Speaker 1: it's really just seen as like a gift giving and
Speaker 1: taking things. Yeah, Kwanza I found out happens after the
Speaker 1: day after Christmas, so it's the twenty six to New Year,
Speaker 1: so it's that dead week, so it's there's there's territory there.
Speaker 1: It's one thing a day, one days like unity. One
Speaker 1: day's like togetherness, and it's about like it's the kind
Speaker 1: of stuff that I would I wouldn't have even known
Speaker 1: what you were talking about had you suggested that, but
Speaker 1: I could see my daughters and also TikTokers getting this
Speaker 1: big and being like today for unity blah blah blah.
Speaker 1: You get a couple of big people on that and Kwanza.
Speaker 1: I'm saying, Christmas is there to be nice is wobbly.
Speaker 2: So you're saying, if I'm hearing you correctly, you're not
Speaker 2: necessarily tracking it rising. Yet you're on some like future
Speaker 2: stock shit. Yeah, this is this is investing in in
Speaker 2: pork belly for you. Yeah, like it also.
Speaker 1: Charting the drop of right, you think Christmas is on
Speaker 1: the decline, not on the decline. I think what we've
Speaker 1: seen is that, for whatever lies we want to tell ourselves,
Speaker 1: most of these holidays are for adults. Like Halloween. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we say trick or treating, but them kids are in
Speaker 1: the house by dusk. Ain't no late night trick or treating.
Speaker 1: And if there is, it's out in the suburbs. I
Speaker 1: live in Denver, in a house in a nice, safe neighborhood,
Speaker 1: you know, and I've been there, saying, right for COVID
Speaker 1: like four or five years. I don't think I've ever
Speaker 1: gotten a trick or treater. Houses are close to each other.
Speaker 1: It's it was a neighborhood that's like built for you
Speaker 1: can hit ten houses. Yeah, but like now everybody throws
Speaker 1: they kids in the car and they go out to
Speaker 1: the suburbs because the suburbs can block off like the street,
Speaker 1: and then everybody pops their garages and it's kind of
Speaker 1: like a dick measuring contest between how is like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you're giving out candy, but they got music in their
Speaker 1: wife's got her tits out.
Speaker 3: You know, over here giving out scholarship.
Speaker 1: You know, it's like a chance for closeted extroverts to
Speaker 1: act like, oh, I'm just sexy Sherlock Holmes. It's like,
Speaker 1: all right, you know what I'm saying. You just wanted
Speaker 1: to put on some fish nets at being public because
Speaker 1: that's when you are internally. So I feel like Halloween
Speaker 1: parties are big. Halloween last like three four or five days.
Speaker 1: I saw people in November going to Halloween.
Speaker 2: So we were on tour, yeah, and we're in We
Speaker 2: were in Atlanta on Halloween and mostly performing for old
Speaker 2: black ladies who were not participating in.
Speaker 3: Halloween, not having a great time. They were not there
Speaker 3: for it at all. But we then toured.
Speaker 2: We had like four days basically, and went to Austin,
Speaker 2: like three days later. In Austin, three days after Halloween
Speaker 2: was still celebrating. Halloween was still Sixth Street was blocked off.
Speaker 2: Everybody had on a costume, and it was it felt
Speaker 2: very adult in that way and where it had nothing
Speaker 2: to do with children and trick or treating. This was
Speaker 2: grown ups in nasty clothes wearing their shit.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and that's how I think about it. I do
Speaker 3: think about it as it's Halloween's for phone parties or whatever.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean.
Speaker 3: You don't think about the kids, not at all, and
Speaker 3: I don't. I do think I used to see more kids.
Speaker 3: I feel like I used to see more kids. I mean,
Speaker 3: you don't see kids out the house in general anymore,
Speaker 3: but I used to see more. Like even within my neighborhood,
Speaker 3: it's like like yours, like clauses close together set up
Speaker 3: for trick or treating. Hardly anybody had any any kind
Speaker 3: of like lawn ornaments, any kind of lights there just
Speaker 3: really wasn't a lot.
Speaker 2: Of It took all that when we were kids. And
Speaker 2: I grew up in a suburb of Chicago, but when
Speaker 2: we were kids, it felt like we were terrorizing people's homes,
Speaker 2: where like the doorbell ever stopped ringing, Like if you
Speaker 2: shut your door, you were getting ring ring ring all
Speaker 2: night long. And now even at my house, like and
Speaker 2: I live in a pretty like walkable, very nice, pleasant
Speaker 2: neighbors houses around, and like we get some trick or treaters,
Speaker 2: but they don't bother us, Like if we turn the
Speaker 2: porch light off, it's over. Like everybody's very like aware
Speaker 2: and respectful of the holiday. And so I to circle
Speaker 2: this back to Christmas. If it sounds like I'm understanding
Speaker 2: you correctly, It's less that Christmas is disappearing, but more
Speaker 2: that we value it differently than we did as children.
Speaker 1: Absolutely, and only the people that like the kind of
Speaker 1: religious people to go to go to church on Christmas
Speaker 1: Eve or go to church Christmas Day or something like that.
Speaker 1: It really is almost like Thanksgiving. It's a holiday for
Speaker 1: older folks, football and food. That's great for me. I'm
Speaker 1: damn near fifty, but like my son don't care about football.
Speaker 1: Six things so like he's like, I don't eat that much,
Speaker 1: Like Thanksgiving isn't a big deal to him, And there's
Speaker 1: a space for Kwanza and just any other kind of
Speaker 1: like like holidays kind of go up and down, and
Speaker 1: like I feel like there's just going to be adult
Speaker 1: holidays because Halloween, I think it's almost fully adult, but
Speaker 1: just like you need the kids for the for the
Speaker 1: beard of it, but really a lot there's gonna be
Speaker 1: a younger generation that takes like a kind of fringe holiday,
Speaker 1: dust it off and makes it their own.
Speaker 2: I love the idea of the executives at Big Kwanza rubbing.
Speaker 2: They're rubbing their hands together.
Speaker 3: We hear a big Quansa in Detroit.
Speaker 2: Yeah, are you tired of Santa Claus dancing in the
Speaker 2: back of your videos? Come on over here to Big Kwanza.
Speaker 1: That's the thing. And then we're gonna have to watch
Speaker 1: the commodification of Quansa, which is gonna be the most
Speaker 1: American thing you can do. Is like all these things
Speaker 1: that you think are so underground as we look at
Speaker 1: like Snoop selling us, you know, fire pits outside.
Speaker 3: We got we got some of that Snoop whine on Thanksgiving.
Speaker 1: Yeah, wine is just like I mean, all these things
Speaker 1: that were underground, now they're gonna be used to market
Speaker 1: to you.
Speaker 2: We were talking about this before you got here, but
Speaker 2: we were talking about how quickly Juneteenth got you served
Speaker 2: as now a just general national holiday that everybody gets
Speaker 2: the day off for nobody. Yet you ain't gotta pray,
Speaker 2: you ain't gotta to go thank your black neighbor, nothing.
Speaker 2: It's just you get the day off and you ain't
Speaker 2: gotta talk about it. And it happened so fast because
Speaker 2: four years ago even I don't think I knew any
Speaker 2: white people who even would.
Speaker 3: It wasn't even it was It wasn't up for discussion.
Speaker 3: It never came up, no like, and then they found
Speaker 3: about out about that ship, and then white ladies got
Speaker 3: an Instagram filter and it was gone.
Speaker 2: And I don't I mean, I'm not from the South,
Speaker 2: y'all ain't from the South. It wasn't a thing for
Speaker 2: me growing up, not at all, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: Like even in black households, it's not like everybody celebrated June.
Speaker 1: Team you would get a calendar and it'd be like
Speaker 1: Juneteenth was in the same genre as like, you know,
Speaker 1: like there'll be a day that's like Winter Soul System. Yeah,
Speaker 1: is that you know what I'm saying?
Speaker 4: Yeah day?
Speaker 1: Yeah, Yeah, they have to they like that a law
Speaker 1: has been passed. They have to alert you that that's
Speaker 1: a but it wasn't a thing. And then, like you said,
Speaker 1: out of nowhere, it's just like you don't celebrate Junie.
Speaker 1: You don't think we should. I don't think most Americans
Speaker 1: even to say, know exactly what it is. No, they
Speaker 1: probably heard it once, but just like you know, people
Speaker 1: are just coming around MLK Day.
Speaker 2: Yeah. And that's also a fascinating thing because I didn't realize,
Speaker 2: and this is my own ignorance. I didn't realize how
Speaker 2: recently MLK Day was a day. You know what I
Speaker 2: mean that, I don't know how recently it is mokday.
Speaker 2: They were fighting against it during the fucking I think
Speaker 2: bush it, yeah.
Speaker 1: Straight, Arizona, Arizona wouldn't like because, uh, what's it called
Speaker 1: the Public Enemy had a song basically about it by
Speaker 1: the time I get ar Yeah, yeah, yeah, and uh
Speaker 1: it was just like people would not they would not
Speaker 1: take the day off just out of like clear defiance
Speaker 1: of just like fuck that dude.
Speaker 2: It like didn't get declared a national holiday until like
Speaker 2: pretty recently.
Speaker 3: That's crazy. I guess we are. We're at least of
Speaker 3: the age where it's like, that's right when we would
Speaker 3: have been little kids enough to not know because I
Speaker 3: always recall it, but I always remember it.
Speaker 2: But damn, that's cool blooded yeah man, But to that point,
Speaker 2: Juneteenth is now it seems ubiquitous, ye, with like the
Speaker 2: American holiday experience, and then the same feels like it
Speaker 2: will happen to Kwanza should it get this this ineviten.
Speaker 1: It'll be a clear dividing line between the generations. I think, like,
Speaker 1: I think it'll be a younger person thing, and eventually
Speaker 1: they will be older, but for a while it will
Speaker 1: be like twenty four year old students at NYU consciously
Speaker 1: celebrate it and it gets some kind of you know,
Speaker 1: traction on the Internet from it. But like your uncle
Speaker 1: will be like, what now, it.
Speaker 3: Doesn't make sense. I see what you're saying. It's right
Speaker 3: for like, it's the perfect small cause for an internet
Speaker 3: asshole to take up, right, Like that's the perfect thing.
Speaker 3: Everybody's heard of it, but it's still niche enough that
Speaker 3: you you could be interesting by doing it's a perfect
Speaker 3: way to pretend you're interesting.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what I'm saying. It reminds me a little bit.
Speaker 2: I've been watching the Menindez brothers shit, Like, you know,
Speaker 2: they had the show and then they had the documentary
Speaker 2: and they both came out sort of in tandem. But
Speaker 2: part of the reason that the Menendez brothers are now
Speaker 2: getting like this new trial, or at least this new
Speaker 2: assessment of their sentencing, was in part because a bunch
Speaker 2: of TikTok kids started unpacking their story and going like, hey,
Speaker 2: it's fucked up that we didn't address all the sexual
Speaker 2: assault stuff that happened in their family. That like, they
Speaker 2: claimed that they were brutally brutally assaulted by this father
Speaker 2: and the mother to some extent, and that was the
Speaker 2: cause for them needing to kill their parents, and they
Speaker 2: in the trial it gets treated a lot more like
Speaker 2: y'all are just bad boys. You did a bad thing.
Speaker 2: You're going to jail for the rest of your life.
Speaker 2: And that all happened on TikTok. And so the question
Speaker 2: of a person on TikTok being like, we got to
Speaker 2: reassess Kwanza. It feels very in the wheelhouse of some
Speaker 2: TikTok shit.
Speaker 3: I also feel like Christmas is right for a takedown
Speaker 3: just because of blame it on Jeff Bezos. Kids get
Speaker 3: too many packages. They're not as excited about presidents. Yeah,
Speaker 3: think about it. When you were a kid, how many
Speaker 3: packages you got?
Speaker 2: Very rare.
Speaker 3: I got a package I went it was the most.
Speaker 3: It was as exciting as Christmas. My mom's saying, David,
Speaker 3: you got something in the mail that was not it
Speaker 3: was It's the same as Christmas. It was the same exactly.
Speaker 1: You've been thinking about it for weeks when you sent
Speaker 1: away for some of the six to eight weeks. Every
Speaker 1: day at school you'd be like, man, is that is
Speaker 1: that gonna be at home? And then when it is,
Speaker 1: it was trash.
Speaker 3: Whatever it was, it was trash. Nothing damn.
Speaker 2: That's quick, beanie, nothing I could afford.
Speaker 3: In the east Bay magazine, where's that documentary? Netflix?
Speaker 2: Yeah, east By went through it. They had a high
Speaker 2: high and a low low.
Speaker 1: That was that was. You know, there's always this narrative
Speaker 1: that like women be shopping, but like guys looked at
Speaker 1: that catalog in the exact same way that my grandmother
Speaker 1: would look at a sex with avenue catalog and be like,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get that. Look at my grandm would be like,
Speaker 1: look at those Isotona gloves, and we'd be like, look
Speaker 1: at those shorts. You could customize all. We could go
Speaker 1: to the court with the same color shorts. It was
Speaker 1: like the same thing, got all.
Speaker 3: The colors of shocks, every shock.
Speaker 2: The amount of times me and my boys sat in
Speaker 2: a bed feet up just slipping through East Bay talking
Speaker 2: about the shoes we were never gonna have, bro, it's
Speaker 2: the the hours that I wasted.
Speaker 3: I used to look at east By like a real
Speaker 3: magazine where I'd be like, oh, I haven't seen this one.
Speaker 2: It meant the world to me.
Speaker 3: You're planning outfits, planning full East Bay outfit.
Speaker 1: Did you order anything from there?
Speaker 2: Never one time I think I got some Team Jordans once,
Speaker 2: like it talks my dad into getting me some Team
Speaker 2: Jordans out of the again Team Jordans that ain't Jordans.
Speaker 1: That that's the polo club of Yeah, yeah it was.
Speaker 4: It was.
Speaker 2: I should be fair to myself. It was also early
Speaker 2: in the Team Jordan era where we didn't quite understand
Speaker 2: they had they.
Speaker 3: Were relevant for a minute where it was okay they
Speaker 3: had a moment where you didn't quite know that those
Speaker 3: weren't going to be treated like real Jordan's.
Speaker 2: It felt like like twelve and a halfs and you
Speaker 2: were like a school, we got them twelve and a
Speaker 2: half whatever, And now we all know that. Yeah it's
Speaker 2: it's the US Polo Association.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh that's what it is. That sounds like like
Speaker 1: the minor leagues.
Speaker 2: Yeah it was a bad but I got some of those.
Speaker 2: But truly everything else was just a dream that I
Speaker 2: was selling myself.
Speaker 3: I would have myself fitted before football season with that.
Speaker 3: That East Bavi came out right before school started. Of
Speaker 3: course I had the gloves circle, I had the cleat circle.
Speaker 3: Never got any of it, but man, I was ready.
Speaker 1: I ordered two things. I ordered this thing called the
Speaker 1: Aci rim. I used to play hoop, and it was
Speaker 1: like a rim that you put on on the inside
Speaker 1: like it was what an own person would ship in.
Speaker 1: And that ship gets your jumper so nice because you
Speaker 1: it has to be not only just a swish, but
Speaker 1: it puts. You had to put arc on it. So
Speaker 1: when you practice a couple of summers with that, bro,
Speaker 1: my my jumper was worked. Bro. It worked.
Speaker 2: You're the first person I've ever heard who bought like
Speaker 2: a basketball tea that was like, Noah, this should worked.
Speaker 1: Did your dream of just having a rebounder like all
Speaker 1: time rebound? No, but just a person I used to
Speaker 1: think of, like this imaginary guy that would just like rebound,
Speaker 1: Like how many more shots I could get up? If
Speaker 1: you're doing.
Speaker 3: You was a Lobe child.
Speaker 1: Yeah, shooting jumpers is the day giveaway.
Speaker 3: Your least told me. The second thing you got was
Speaker 3: those pliometric shoes. That's the ones I wanted so bad.
Speaker 1: You know, that's exactly what I'm about to tell you. Yes,
Speaker 1: they were called strength shoes. I used to be able
Speaker 1: to dunk with two hands. I rupture my achilles tendon.
Speaker 1: But it absolutely they absolutely worked.
Speaker 3: Oh that fucks me up. Yes, because I remember, like
Speaker 3: your parents are like this is ridiculous. There's no special
Speaker 3: sneakers you're gonna wear. But like I remember looking at
Speaker 3: and being like, this technology makes sense.
Speaker 2: You're on your tiptop.
Speaker 1: This technology makes sense. It really really worked. I obviously
Speaker 1: my kids one of the best days of my life.
Speaker 1: I've had some good highlights in my life. I threw
Speaker 1: down a dunk at my boy Donnie's house in his driveway.
Speaker 1: I still remember that. That's probably thirty years ago.
Speaker 3: No, but that's this is one of the best days
Speaker 3: of my life hearing about it.
Speaker 1: Dude, it was you know who had crazy hops? Is
Speaker 1: Craig Robinson? What he came to our show because he's
Speaker 1: doing the show in deference, so he came on our
Speaker 1: set and I don't know why we were talking about basketball.
Speaker 1: We had the clip ready it was him no comic
Speaker 1: shoes of the hack joke, but it was him two
Speaker 1: hundred pounds ago. But I mean like crazy like threw
Speaker 1: down like uh Darryl Dawkins dunk like what it bruh.
Speaker 1: Craig Robinson was a baller, like you know what.
Speaker 2: I could see that because he's bigger than you think
Speaker 2: he is, right like he's like he's like secretly like
Speaker 2: almost six three six four I think. And then he
Speaker 2: also is like one of them dudes that like had
Speaker 2: a whole life before he got to comedy.
Speaker 1: Another teacher like us.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he was a teacher. He was a musician. He
Speaker 2: did a lot of shit. And I think those kinds
Speaker 2: of guys they always you got one in your pocket
Speaker 2: where you're just like, yeah, I used to play ball, yeah,
Speaker 2: I used to dunk all motherfuckers. I don't do that
Speaker 2: no more. Capefully, those sneakers worked.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, I'm just like they convinced one birthday, dude.
Speaker 1: They looked ridiculous and you looked great. They were like
Speaker 1: snow shoes in the city. They were like it was
Speaker 1: like a wider platform and then the shoe was on top. Right,
Speaker 1: it was like a trophy of a shoe.
Speaker 2: It was like you were walking around like a gi joe,
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, Like you're truly just sitting
Speaker 2: on top of fucking g I Joe platform. Yes, and
Speaker 2: that you just kept you on your tiptoes all day.
Speaker 1: I mean you do see women, I don't know as
Speaker 1: much as you used to when it was like almost
Speaker 1: unacceptable for women to be out without wearing high heels.
Speaker 1: But when when you think, and I've talked to a
Speaker 1: lot of my female friends because I just took it
Speaker 1: for granted, like, oh, they throw heels on, they go
Speaker 1: out to party, think about being on your toes, leaving
Speaker 1: the house, going up and downstairs, dancing back on your toes,
Speaker 1: and then you see it like some chicks would have
Speaker 1: like crazy calves. You'm like, gosh, it's like it makes sense,
Speaker 1: it gets your leg game right.
Speaker 2: For Sam show, we we we all put on high
Speaker 2: heels to like tryumph because that was like part of
Speaker 2: a bid of an episode. Whatever. I walked probably ten feet.
Speaker 2: It was like, I don't want I can't do this
Speaker 2: no more.
Speaker 1: It's amazing. It's just like, man, it's crazy when you
Speaker 1: think about it, like that is something I have thought
Speaker 1: about though, that we are in an era that speaking
Speaker 1: of East Bay, that we would have never thought about
Speaker 1: in terms of sports where women's basketball, pro and college.
Speaker 1: Like I've talked to homies and been like, yo, the
Speaker 1: Iowa games going on, hits you back, and they're talking
Speaker 1: about women's college basketball. Think about how crazy that would
Speaker 1: have sounded eight years ago.
Speaker 2: Now, dog I did. I was a practice player at
Speaker 2: UH for our college, our women's college basketball team.
Speaker 1: That's cool.
Speaker 2: Yeah it was fun college Michigan. Oh Jesus, yeah one,
Speaker 2: yeah it was. They were the worst team.
Speaker 1: And you must can ball though.
Speaker 2: I was pretty good. Yeah I could play. I could
Speaker 2: play some ball. I can't anymore. But at a time
Speaker 2: in my life I was pretty good at basketball. But
Speaker 2: one of the things that that I realized, even when
Speaker 2: doing it this was two thousand seven that I'm doing it.
Speaker 2: There was nobody I told it to that didn't laugh
Speaker 2: in my face, you know what I mean. Like even
Speaker 2: now when I mention it to like executives and stuff,
Speaker 2: they kind of like chuckle and shit because it's as
Speaker 2: a premise, just seems absurd that a man would bow
Speaker 2: the knee to more talented women than him at a
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, at a thing wild lead
Speaker 2: more talented, so much better. I'm giving you props from
Speaker 2: being on the court with them. I just think that.
Speaker 1: It's I forgot what that principle is called. Like, the
Speaker 1: more you learn, the more you realize, the less you know,
Speaker 1: and so you understand how difficult life is. And that's why,
Speaker 1: like a lot of people will look at some amazing
Speaker 1: and be like, oh yeah, all right, yeah basketball, you
Speaker 1: shoot the ball and the hoop, got it. But like
Speaker 1: when you learn basketball, you have to learn how to
Speaker 1: shoot and get your mechanics, then learn how to dribble,
Speaker 1: then learn how to play defense, then learn how to
Speaker 1: play team basketball, and then learn how to play against
Speaker 1: the zone. You just realize that you'll never know all
Speaker 1: the stuff. But if you keep your horizon super low.
Speaker 1: Everything is super easy to you. You're like, it's just
Speaker 1: because you take the simplest. You can't do anything right,
Speaker 1: you can't do nothing. Everything hard seems easy because you've
Speaker 1: never tried to do anything.
Speaker 2: It's the thing that drives me the craziest. I only
Speaker 2: watch the NBA. I'm not really tapped in in any
Speaker 2: other sport, but like you'll see it, probably every day
Speaker 2: that an NBA game is playing, some some player's name
Speaker 2: will be trending, and it's just people saying they're fucking trash,
Speaker 2: just like Gay Vincent for the Lakers, unbelievable. Every week
Speaker 2: they're like, fucking gave n He's the worst player in
Speaker 2: the league. He fucking sucks. He is so good at basketball.
Speaker 3: He's the best athlete you would ever come across if
Speaker 3: you met him in person in your entire life, by
Speaker 3: far and away, every every single NBA athlete.
Speaker 2: I've played against d two dudes that I was like,
Speaker 2: I can't believe how much better you are at basketball
Speaker 2: than I am. You know what I mean, your light
Speaker 2: years above what I'm capable of. So like, what are
Speaker 2: we talking about? He's not trash. You're upset with him,
Speaker 2: and you're in a bad way because your parlay ain't
Speaker 2: gonna hit. But like, no way is this a bad
Speaker 2: basketball player. Watch your fucking mouth.
Speaker 1: There's no respect. Watch your mouth, Doug. It's like in
Speaker 1: terms of just like can you put a little speck
Speaker 1: on anybody's name? Like it? Dude. I remember when the
Speaker 1: Calves won the title from Cleveland. It is the only
Speaker 1: time our city's ever seen a title in my lifetime.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry that's happened to you.
Speaker 1: I mean dysfunctional organizations. I mean, if you think about it,
Speaker 1: if you look at the team, it's just and I
Speaker 1: was telling my my homie this in a weird way.
Speaker 1: If you think about how like just soccer or football whatever.
Speaker 1: In Europe, if you suck, they demote you to basically
Speaker 1: secret late sys it is. But here NFL, they share
Speaker 1: that tea TV money, so there's no incentive for your
Speaker 1: team to get better. Because the good thing about capitalism
Speaker 1: whatever is it eliminates poorly run companies.
Speaker 3: But here with what team do we talked about that with?
Speaker 2: I don't remember, but I do remember the conversation.
Speaker 3: Oh Jerry Jones, right, yeah, yeah, because because it's more
Speaker 3: lucrative than for win than if he's a winner.
Speaker 1: What if what if the Cowboys or the Browns had
Speaker 1: to drop down and play in like the XFL or
Speaker 1: the AFL. If it was the XFL and the Super
Speaker 1: Bowl winner came up and played in the pros like soccer. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like you get, you get, and it would just keep
Speaker 1: your ship. So you're just not like, yo, we got
Speaker 1: an eighty five year old running our team, and your
Speaker 1: team looks like it a good wide receiver. It's like
Speaker 1: the way like a seven year old with draft, like
Speaker 1: I just need a good wide receiver. It's like no,
Speaker 1: you know, but you there, there's no incentive to get
Speaker 1: better because the floor is the same as the ceiling.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we're the split. We still see the bread that
Speaker 2: we're gonna see. Everybody's gonna eat.
Speaker 1: And it increases every year.
Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, you just got to keep on. You just
Speaker 3: gotta hold the team as long as you own it.
Speaker 3: You make that money. That's a bad business.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Before once again, I'm sorry you guys haven't won. We
Speaker 3: recently won. It was pretty great. Yeah, you're a b No,
Speaker 3: this is because it's Christmas. It didn't come across the bit.
Speaker 3: The bit didn't really work. This is coming out on
Speaker 3: Christmas Eve. Yeah, so I wore Christmas colors. Well, you
Speaker 3: had on the Santa hat and then and then I
Speaker 3: gave it to like because I wanted him to be involved.
Speaker 3: That's all what this is about. Yeah, you you swung
Speaker 3: big on Christmas. I swung huge.
Speaker 2: You said I love the Lord. That's not what I want,
Speaker 2: you know, that's what you said. What I said, that's
Speaker 2: not what I said.
Speaker 3: I think women should work more.
Speaker 2: Before we go to break. Do you have you ever
Speaker 2: celebrated kwants in your adult life? No? Not as a child,
Speaker 2: but not even as an adult.
Speaker 1: No, And I don't. Maybe I was thinking, since I
Speaker 1: have this take on my next year, you know, because
Speaker 1: it's too late now to spring it on my kids.
Speaker 1: But I know, I know, it's like, that's my that's
Speaker 1: my I'd be like, I'm ready, Oh, y'all are college?
Speaker 1: All right?
Speaker 2: Then this is gonna be one young child being annihilated
Speaker 2: by a new a new holiday.
Speaker 3: I would be so hard. He knows his brother, he
Speaker 3: knows his siblings at Christmas?
Speaker 1: Yeah, friends, Yeah, it's like, yo, what did you get
Speaker 1: for unity today? Who moji out of coach?
Speaker 2: Coach? It turns out me and my dad held hands
Speaker 2: in the kitchen and said what we're grateful for about
Speaker 2: each other?
Speaker 1: That's that's what it is. But the only time that
Speaker 1: that works hold hands talking about like hey man, we
Speaker 1: live a good life, which I think we should do
Speaker 1: more often, like I have, I've tried to do. But
Speaker 1: you know, comics is like that's a certain time in
Speaker 1: your life that's like post college until you get married,
Speaker 1: where you're trying to figure out who you are and
Speaker 1: there's a there's a space in there where like you
Speaker 1: be open. It's also the same period of time where
Speaker 1: you're open to join in a cult. It's just weird.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's the same thing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean really.
Speaker 3: This is a cult. What do you think there's a
Speaker 3: comedy thing?
Speaker 1: I mean, come on, I was telling my boy the
Speaker 1: other day with cults, like I wonder if, like cause
Speaker 1: if we only see the people that successfully started them,
Speaker 1: and you know that there's something that it failed, But
Speaker 1: what about the kinds of just like you have a
Speaker 1: cult and you try to like five hundred people and
Speaker 1: you got like four, Bro, there's twenty people? Really?
Speaker 3: Yeah, shut up? What's the what's nick? Do you know
Speaker 3: the county where the Frozen Dead Lady was my Mother God. Yeah,
Speaker 3: but in that county, there's several other cults that are
Speaker 3: on the same type of thing where it's just like
Speaker 3: ten people who are on this ship.
Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe that's the way to go, because like next
Speaker 1: to them got too big and once they started branding
Speaker 1: them that, the government was like, we got to get in.
Speaker 2: Have you seen the Mother God documentary?
Speaker 1: I think so. Is that that woman that kind of
Speaker 1: went crazy but like those kids were obsessed with her?
Speaker 1: Which one's the mother got.
Speaker 2: She she starts drinking silver?
Speaker 1: Yes, I saw that one. Absolutely.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's very that one. That part of it. I
Speaker 2: had to carry her around at the end, she like
Speaker 2: drinks herself to death, but specifically with silver and alcohol.
Speaker 1: Right, But you imagine like diagnosing cirrhosis and then also
Speaker 1: having to be like are you drinking liquid silver?
Speaker 4: Yes?
Speaker 2: Yes, because I'm God. But that one, I think is
Speaker 2: an example of like there were only like fifteen people,
Speaker 2: but they fucked with her heart.
Speaker 3: That's that's all you need. Small batched cults is really
Speaker 3: the way to go. I think that's what the problem
Speaker 3: becomes when they scale it up. Like, but if you're
Speaker 3: able to start a religion and it's just like you
Speaker 3: get eight to ten people, but they'll die for that ship.
Speaker 3: I'll get greedy, you know what I mean? How much
Speaker 3: do you need?
Speaker 2: My wife keeps trying to start a cult. What. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I probably shouldn't have done this right before a break,
Speaker 2: but ah, she's actively keeps being her whole thing. She's
Speaker 2: a lawyer, and she keeps saying that a cult in
Speaker 2: order to start to get religious exemption from taxes, all
Speaker 2: you need, technically is a firmly held belief. You don't
Speaker 2: need a lot of paperwork. There isn't even a lot
Speaker 2: of filing because she does nonprofit tax work and so, like,
Speaker 2: part of what she knows is that like religious exemption
Speaker 2: is very different than like if you have to file
Speaker 2: as a nonprofit that services this and this for the
Speaker 2: community whatever. And so she keeps trying to convince her friends,
Speaker 2: if we buy a compound somewhere and we just establish
Speaker 2: a firmly held belief, we can create religious exemption and
Speaker 2: live off the grid, get out of here.
Speaker 3: That's pretty cool.
Speaker 2: It is pretty cool. My issue with it, and this
Speaker 2: is what I keep trying to emphasize with her, is
Speaker 2: that this is a.
Speaker 3: Great because I don't imagine you guys have that fight,
Speaker 3: but you're in a.
Speaker 2: It's most of our fights.
Speaker 1: It's like you have to put that hat on to
Speaker 1: be able to speak in front of the groups on
Speaker 1: the Santa Hat. I understand.
Speaker 2: My issue with it is not that it doesn't sound dope.
Speaker 2: It's that historically we've always seen somebody take it too far,
Speaker 2: do you know what I mean? Like Wild Wild Country
Speaker 2: was about people putting on maroon and fucking in the woods,
Speaker 2: and everybody loved it, and they were doing great, and
Speaker 2: there were no problems until Sheila took it a step
Speaker 2: too far and she poisoned the water supply. And now
Speaker 2: all of a sudden, we don't get to fuck in
Speaker 2: the woods no more because things got crazy, do you
Speaker 2: know what I mean? Like, there's always that You'll be sure.
Speaker 1: I got to step in for Sheila, Doug. You think
Speaker 1: Sheila is a hero in the story. I think Sheila
Speaker 1: is maybe, and this is going to sound crazy. I
Speaker 1: put her in the same pantheon that I put Kobe,
Speaker 1: whoa I swear to God and that somebody that's able
Speaker 1: to have determination on the level where it's unhealthy but
Speaker 1: it's necessary to get what you want done done. Kobe
Speaker 1: is going through a rape trial and balling on his
Speaker 1: off dse the death thousand yard deaths there. That's what
Speaker 1: Sheila had. And Sheila was cool until that county around
Speaker 1: her started trying to pull some Shenanigans with the votes
Speaker 1: and trying to get them up out of there, and
Speaker 1: Sheila was like, it ain't going. What did Marlosa and
Speaker 1: the wire? You wanted to be one way, but it's
Speaker 1: the other way. It was the other way.
Speaker 3: And I don't have that in me. I don't know how.
Speaker 1: Many people do. But if you can get Sheila on
Speaker 1: your side, you're in good shape. If she's going against
Speaker 1: you as a problem.
Speaker 2: But that's my issue is that I think it's not
Speaker 2: that you don't want Sheila on your side, and I
Speaker 2: agree with you. It was much more about those white
Speaker 2: people making problems for them than it was that Sheila
Speaker 2: created the problems.
Speaker 3: But what you do need with this.
Speaker 2: Firmly help belief is a level of sobriety where you go,
Speaker 2: we don't really believe this shit, and Sheila really fucking believed.
Speaker 2: Yeah right, that's dangerous.
Speaker 3: And that's that's just you being too good of a
Speaker 3: cult leader.
Speaker 2: That's the problem is that, like somebody in there is
Speaker 2: really gonna be like, I'll die for this shit. Well
Speaker 2: you need everybody kill you for this. I'll kill you
Speaker 2: for this shit. And that's scary.
Speaker 3: But that's what I like about what your wife's idea is.
Speaker 3: She's like, hey, y'all, we're gonna run a scam. M
Speaker 3: we all know we're scamming that that I think seems reasonable,
Speaker 3: but I've been always starts that way. Yeah, I think
Speaker 3: he pulled me over because I was on you.
Speaker 1: I never thought about the long term because we're imagining
Speaker 1: this in this abstract way, like we are all kind
Speaker 1: of these fixed individuals, but we all know that there
Speaker 1: have been periods of our lives. We got homeboys where
Speaker 1: it's like, yeah, this is a fun thing. After like
Speaker 1: he's had twenty seven nights of threesomes with twenty five
Speaker 1: year olds calling him their lord or whatever. That would change,
Speaker 1: but the chemicals in his mind.
Speaker 3: Truly, But that's not what he's talking about, right Because
Speaker 3: also the way that your wife is describing it, there's
Speaker 3: no growth.
Speaker 2: But I don't know that she can see past that.
Speaker 2: Do you see what I'm saying. I think she's looking
Speaker 2: at as like I have eleven best friends. If me
Speaker 2: and my eleven best friends all lived on a compound
Speaker 2: together and we pretended to have this firmly held belief,
Speaker 2: we'd be fine. But what she's skipping is that we
Speaker 2: are raising children, and our children would be raised on
Speaker 2: this compound with this firmly held belief as a principle
Speaker 2: that they're living under, which means that they will eventually
Speaker 2: want to carry that forward. And maybe my kids are
Speaker 2: cool enough that they get that this is a bit,
Speaker 2: or maybe my son is a weirdo who decides that
Speaker 2: the firmly held belief means he gets four pussies a night,
Speaker 2: and if he doesn't get his four pussies a night,
Speaker 2: he'll chop your feet off. What I'm now is got
Speaker 2: a problem. But what I'm saying is the eleven of you,
Speaker 2: or however of the eleven couples on the compound, right,
Speaker 2: are you actually withhelding to the believer? Is that what
Speaker 2: you're telling the government? I tell the government all kinds
Speaker 2: of shit. You know what I'm saying. Are you in
Speaker 2: that compound practicing a religion? Or is there a set
Speaker 2: of rules that you're telling the government you reside by it?
Speaker 2: But you guys are just living, Because if you guys
Speaker 2: are just living, I don't think it becomes that. I
Speaker 2: think it becomes just like a cool scam you guys
Speaker 2: are running. I think I don't think that's the I
Speaker 2: think that a turn to a religion is a lot
Speaker 2: more purposeful than that. I think what you're saying sounds
Speaker 2: to me idealistic more than what we've seen historically in practice.
Speaker 2: That almost always in practice, somebody takes it too far
Speaker 2: and then you're WACO.
Speaker 3: I mean, what is the firmly hell believe? Are you
Speaker 3: creating a religion or are you hiding from the government
Speaker 3: saying something, Because to me, it sounds like you're just
Speaker 3: hiding from the government and feeding this up.
Speaker 2: And that's part of my problem. She don't have a
Speaker 2: firmly hell belief yet, So until she can come with
Speaker 2: a real argument for what our belief is, I'm not
Speaker 2: buying this until.
Speaker 3: She has a messiah, she has a guy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think again, you do start with a firmly
Speaker 1: hell belief. It doesn't. Hey, all people are great, We're
Speaker 1: all gonna wear Santa hats. That's how it starts. But
Speaker 1: it's not gonna you know, fundamentally, because of the way
Speaker 1: human beings change over the course of times, months, years.
Speaker 1: By the end of it, it's going to be somebody.
Speaker 1: There's going to be because within any faction, you start
Speaker 1: off unified, not just the walking dead. Initially it's like,
Speaker 1: but just the concept we are all trying to not
Speaker 1: get eaten by zombies. We are one unit with that goal.
Speaker 1: But just like any faction Lord of Flies, once you
Speaker 1: get together, that faction is gonna split. Some people are like,
Speaker 1: now let's rate the women, and other people are like,
Speaker 1: let's get sanitation and running water and like have funerals.
Speaker 1: Everything is going to split, and you're going to start
Speaker 1: off like, hey, we all wear Santa hats and we
Speaker 1: have fun. This is all tax scam. Seven years down
Speaker 1: the line, there's no way that you are still that
Speaker 1: is still the model.
Speaker 2: That we're just vibing. No, we're gonna argue about dinner
Speaker 2: one night, and it's gonna create a faction. And now
Speaker 2: suddenly your beliefs and my beliefs are slightly askew, and
Speaker 2: a generation later we're murdering each other. Yes, I don't
Speaker 2: think it's possible nature.
Speaker 3: I don't think it's that talk. I think I think
Speaker 3: I believe in small batch of cults. Who I believe
Speaker 3: in small batch clotes? Well, I think when you try
Speaker 3: to start scaling it up and inviting people from the outside,
Speaker 3: I think you can do it.
Speaker 1: Well.
Speaker 2: Let me tell you about a little country called the
Speaker 2: United States of America. My man, It started with something
Speaker 2: called the Declaration of Independence, right, uh, and.
Speaker 3: It ain't going so well. It's not going so well.
Speaker 2: He won We need to take a break. Yeah, we
Speaker 2: went so long. Then, all right, we're gonna be back
Speaker 2: with mara Al Jackson more.
Speaker 3: My mama told me.
Speaker 2: We are back.
Speaker 3: Happy Kwanza. What is the quanta reading?
Speaker 2: Actually it's uh.
Speaker 1: I think it's Swahili based, so like, I feel very
Speaker 1: uncomfortable black men from Cleveland Swahi.
Speaker 2: Many many quanzas to you, brothers, Okay, I like that.
Speaker 1: Make quantsa be with you.
Speaker 3: The only word I know is jambo.
Speaker 1: What does that mean?
Speaker 3: It means hello. I had a book when I was
Speaker 3: a kid called Jombo means hello. Yeah, okay, there that.
Speaker 2: Guy stayed with me.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: How many books do you read? You remember years later?
Speaker 1: It's impressive.
Speaker 2: I read a lot of.
Speaker 3: Books as a kid. I don't read it as many
Speaker 3: as an adult, but I read a share of books
Speaker 3: as a kid.
Speaker 1: Man I had adhd or do, but dude, I got
Speaker 1: adderall and it changed my life. I started being able
Speaker 1: to read. I got through college without ever really reading.
Speaker 1: I just had to listen because I couldn't read anything.
Speaker 1: And then I just went on a tear and I
Speaker 1: started reading everything.
Speaker 3: Oh no, I don't have it anymore. I'm my brain
Speaker 3: as much. But as a kid, I was like, really,
Speaker 3: you feel the starting to go. Yeah, it's tough because
Speaker 3: I recently realized I ran out of like all the
Speaker 3: knowledge I acquired from reading in my youth.
Speaker 2: I got to the end.
Speaker 3: Does that make sense? Like the porch is over, and
Speaker 3: now I got to acquire new and the muscle at
Speaker 3: your feed from Not like I still read, but I
Speaker 3: read like four or five books in a.
Speaker 2: Year, you know what I mean. There's a very embarrassing
Speaker 2: thing when somebody asks you, like, what's your favorite book,
Speaker 2: and then something from high school pops in your head.
Speaker 1: Truly, Yeah, fences, Yeah, ELI was out like the things
Speaker 1: they carried. Yeah, you just have to act like you
Speaker 1: kept reading. But that books that you're like, look, catching
Speaker 1: a Riot still really good?
Speaker 3: Okay, this is fucked up.
Speaker 4: Though that it is.
Speaker 2: I do feel that way about that book. He literally
Speaker 2: he tried to argue with me the other day about
Speaker 2: how good that book it is.
Speaker 3: It is amazing, It is amazing.
Speaker 1: I need to reread it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we should all reread it.
Speaker 2: I taught it, and I don't feel that way.
Speaker 3: I love it, and I've read other sallengers shit to
Speaker 3: make sure that I love it. But you know what
Speaker 3: I mean.
Speaker 1: Okay, great, I'm giving her to reread. He taught English.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I taught high school English.
Speaker 1: I taught middle school science man middle school.
Speaker 2: I hated them. I briefly did like after school programming
Speaker 2: with middle school kids, and they're truly the greatest nightmare
Speaker 2: I could imagine. So I couldn't handle it. You got
Speaker 2: to get on them wor I was at a weird
Speaker 2: time in my life and that I was just as
Speaker 2: crazy as they were. Like I was partying.
Speaker 3: I was Miami.
Speaker 1: I was at twenty seven in Miami, like pre social media,
Speaker 1: so it was like the nineteen fifties. Yeah, I literally
Speaker 1: you it'll smoke SIGs in the bar, like Miami's a
Speaker 1: loose bro. You can like take a scotch and walk
Speaker 1: outside and like like the glass dog and you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, Like they just don't care it down there.
Speaker 1: And so I think my kids felt my energy. But
Speaker 1: now if I try to teach not on there, they.
Speaker 2: Would writ me apart.
Speaker 1: You know, like when the old like one of the first,
Speaker 1: like the original gang member, like goes back to jail
Speaker 1: and he's like, I'm an old gen Like shut.
Speaker 6: Up, you just don't have that energy anymore. So like
Speaker 6: hold up, like we hold up, you're trying to tell
Speaker 6: you don't know your history, young man.
Speaker 2: You see, when we started, it was about breakdance.
Speaker 1: I'll see you at the club. That's how they used
Speaker 1: to settle beefs. Think about that. It's just like me
Speaker 1: and Davids cool, We're gonna settle this on Friday at
Speaker 1: Club Outlander.
Speaker 3: It's like, what I think there's any dance move I
Speaker 3: could do to you that would feel better than hitting
Speaker 3: somebody in the.
Speaker 2: No, there was one brave man who figured that out.
Speaker 2: He lost that dance battle, and I'm just gonna beat
Speaker 2: him up. I'm gonna punch him in the head. I
Speaker 2: think that's gonna feel that that was ground zero for
Speaker 2: gang violence.
Speaker 1: Can we go back to dancing and and graffiti, y'all.
Speaker 3: It's yeah, that's.
Speaker 2: Why we know the name Stanley Tuki Williams.
Speaker 3: You know what I mean, because his windmill wasn't wind
Speaker 3: Now everybody's gotta die.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean if you.
Speaker 1: Think about like Juice doesn't seem like that long ago,
Speaker 1: but when you watch it, when you see the gun
Speaker 1: that Tupac has, like I would give that to my tech.
Speaker 1: That gun is like he's got like a thirty eight.
Speaker 1: He's like, you would look crazy if you pull that out,
Speaker 1: Like you can get that in the club openly, and
Speaker 1: like how quickly that elevated to like you gotta be
Speaker 1: extra strapped up.
Speaker 2: And even that he only had one gun. The whole movie.
Speaker 1: It's a community gun. Yeah.
Speaker 2: The whole movie is just about Tupac got the gun
Speaker 2: and isn't being nice about it, and then everybody's scared.
Speaker 2: It's like, I bro, everybody's got guns now, and everybody
Speaker 2: they're not revolvers, they're they're really.
Speaker 1: That's how they Juice two got squashed in the uh
Speaker 1: just the early development, Like Juice is successful, it's to
Speaker 1: make Juice two where now another guy's got a gun,
Speaker 1: then it's just a gang. Okay, okay, it only works
Speaker 1: if one if there's one gun, what if.
Speaker 2: Tyrese Gibson has the gun?
Speaker 3: Now pretty good, I would watch Juice two starring I.
Speaker 2: Do believe that they made a Juice to and I
Speaker 2: do believe that it starred uh. If I'm not mistaken,
Speaker 2: I think it might have been either Soldier Boy or
Speaker 2: DC Young Fly.
Speaker 3: Really. Oh, they made a Juice too recently.
Speaker 2: I'm pretty I think that's a conspiracy. Yes, yeah, Belly
Speaker 2: two exists.
Speaker 3: Juice, Yeah, it's I kind of it's not great watching
Speaker 3: the movie start in the game.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, I'm sure you've discussed this, but uh,
Speaker 1: I guess what. I guess No, Pop wasn't the first act.
Speaker 1: I mean, ic Tea is in the first couple of Breakings.
Speaker 1: And here is a weird conspiracy I did have because
Speaker 1: I was like, remember the Olympics this past year that
Speaker 1: Australian breakdancer Ray Gun bruined breakdancing. They took it from
Speaker 1: the Olympics. I'll never forget Breaking two. They put a
Speaker 1: white girl in there. She was horrible and that was
Speaker 1: the end of the Breakings because Breaking one it was
Speaker 1: about New York City breakdance scene. It was it was
Speaker 1: like the culture, hip hop dancing, the gay scene like
Speaker 1: an alt scene was really Breaking one. Breaking Two they
Speaker 1: stucked the rich white girl in there because they needed
Speaker 1: that narrative, like my father is going to tear down
Speaker 1: the community center and make a make a strip mall.
Speaker 3: That was a big thing and like also makes no
Speaker 3: sense story wise.
Speaker 1: Talk to me.
Speaker 3: I watched You with My Girl like six months ago.
Speaker 3: It is a horrible movie.
Speaker 2: Is that electric?
Speaker 3: Yeah, so it doesn't make any sense. It's like terribly
Speaker 3: rat like Breaking One had a plot. Breaking Two it
Speaker 3: was just like bad.
Speaker 2: Admittedly, I've never seen either of the Breakings. I don't Oh,
Speaker 2: what are you a beach street guy? No, I haven't
Speaker 2: seen that either. There are certain films crush groove, that's
Speaker 2: your thing, buddy. There are certain generations of films that
Speaker 2: I know that if I watch it, I'm not gonna
Speaker 2: like it, and I don't want to disrespect it. Do
Speaker 2: you know what I mean? Yeah, Roger, just go, I'm
Speaker 2: too old. The generation has passed. There's nothing they're gonna
Speaker 2: do that's gonna like wow me, they're good. Out of respect,
Speaker 2: I'll acknowledge y'all had it, and I'll move on with
Speaker 2: my life instead of doing that ship where we go? Man,
Speaker 2: what the fuck was Rev Run talking about?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: He was killing it back then. I get it, but
Speaker 2: not no more. And I'm not trying to do.
Speaker 4: You know what.
Speaker 1: I still watch it holds up King of New York, Oh,
Speaker 1: with Frank Whitet.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Really, Christop's dark. Okay have you seen that? Wesley Snipe's
Speaker 1: his character, but he that's I mean, he was coked
Speaker 1: out and probably unmedicated. You know, do you ever think
Speaker 1: about that, Like when you look at our parents, Like
Speaker 1: everybody that they grew up with was not medicated. Yeah,
Speaker 1: all the depression, all the alcoholism. Nobody around them was like,
Speaker 1: hey David, I don't think you should be drinking in
Speaker 1: the morning. Like, no one ever told noone depressed. I mean,
Speaker 1: it's crazy that they made it. It's like really bananas
Speaker 1: when you think about it.
Speaker 2: No, they when they call younger generations like weak, I
Speaker 2: do understand what they're saying. I don't agree with it,
Speaker 2: but I understand it. It's like you were truly raw
Speaker 2: dogging the world and you figured out a way to
Speaker 2: survive this ship, and we're asking for reasonable accommodations and
Speaker 2: you're like, but I didn't. I didn't have that right, right,
Speaker 2: And so it's like, no, you comparatively, we we are
Speaker 2: doing a weaker thing, absolutely, but it also you're tripping
Speaker 2: you shouldn't have done.
Speaker 1: That, right. There's some low key hating because I'm sure
Speaker 1: they're looking like, well, do you know what I could
Speaker 1: have done if it wasn't legal to slap your wife
Speaker 1: in Texas until nineteen ninety one or whatever, these crazy
Speaker 1: laws that they grew up with, like women like I
Speaker 1: don't think people realize like the world that women were
Speaker 1: living in up until probably like the mid early nineties,
Speaker 1: where what was going on at work, like your boss
Speaker 1: would just call it, yeah, what's up, hot chocolate? Like
Speaker 1: your like or shut the fuck like people were.
Speaker 3: It was crazy saw on Miami at work with women.
Speaker 1: I'll just say like in the places I worked, some
Speaker 1: of them were comedy clubs. So we're gonna make this
Speaker 1: real vague, but like it would be I can't. It
Speaker 1: was like Studio fifty four. It's exactly what you think.
Speaker 2: It would be.
Speaker 1: There was blow everywhere everywhere, and especially like when you
Speaker 1: would do the the smaller cities you'd be in like
Speaker 1: Fort Myers or somewhere just the owner would just you
Speaker 1: go back there to get paid, get your check, and
Speaker 1: just blow on the table your check sitting there, waitress
Speaker 1: sitting on his lap, he's half in the bag, his
Speaker 1: wife is up front. I mean, it was fuck it,
Speaker 1: but it didn't it didn't seem weird. It was just
Speaker 1: like I was offered to be paid in cocaine, their money,
Speaker 1: and I was like, I was a teacher. I was like,
Speaker 1: give me my I have nothing. I didn't even know.
Speaker 1: But the idea that somebody would even propose that didn't
Speaker 1: seem crazy. I was like, I'm sure some people would
Speaker 1: do it. I was like, I hope I get in
Speaker 1: a position to shake that, you know. Yeah, just dude,
Speaker 1: it was I will say this. And just to wrap
Speaker 1: that up, there was one place where when a new
Speaker 1: waitress would come uh to the club like oh it's
Speaker 1: it's uh, you know, Norah's first night. All the waiters
Speaker 1: and waitresses would be in the the back area where
Speaker 1: the bar is and they would have her like walk
Speaker 1: down like the you know, the gauntlet, and everybody they'd
Speaker 1: be like, look at her ass. They turn her around
Speaker 1: and then everybody, the men and the women, would smack
Speaker 1: her on the ass, holy shit, every new female weight
Speaker 1: staff that's on god like, But it was just like,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, there's a new checkworking. It's just and that's
Speaker 1: where the me too moved again.
Speaker 2: Put her on the cover of Time magazine. Yeah you
Speaker 2: know what I mean, not Terry Crust's don't give a
Speaker 2: fuck about him getting his dick grabbed that one time.
Speaker 2: That lady deserves a profile of like a I went
Speaker 2: through it. There was no payoff on the other end
Speaker 2: of this. No, I was just a waitress at a
Speaker 2: comedy club in Miami. None of this, none of the
Speaker 2: math here works out in my favor right.
Speaker 1: And that waitress would tell a waitress you know from
Speaker 1: her mom's generation, they hit me on the ass, and
Speaker 1: they'd be like, that's all honey.
Speaker 2: Yeah, congratulations, Like think about I mean, it sounds like
Speaker 2: you had a first a good first night.
Speaker 1: Yeah, what is your is your manager?
Speaker 4: Gaida?
Speaker 1: And like women, it's like, yeah, just a what a
Speaker 1: different world. And it wasn't that long ago, you know.
Speaker 2: Before we wrap this thing up, I guess the question
Speaker 2: on my mind. You you talked about the possibility that
Speaker 2: Kwanta could become more powerful. You talked about the possibility
Speaker 2: that Kwanta could be then overtaken by our white counterparts,
Speaker 2: that it would become sort of a universal holiday. My
Speaker 2: question for you is do you think ultimately that would
Speaker 2: be a good thing for the growth? Is the growth
Speaker 2: of this holiday worth the squeeze of it becoming national
Speaker 2: and subsequently slightly white, if not completely.
Speaker 1: Well, there's nothing that's if you do not cross over
Speaker 1: in a popular culture. Popular culture is not only all cultures,
Speaker 1: but definitely white culture. You are going to hit you
Speaker 1: you have a hard ceiling. Think about how many people
Speaker 1: are famous in the black community and people don't know
Speaker 1: who they are. You know, there's a lot, there's a
Speaker 1: lot of if you don't cross that level into like
Speaker 1: where a thirteen year old white kids know who you are,
Speaker 1: twenty seven year old grad students know who you are.
Speaker 1: There is just a level to how far that you
Speaker 1: can go within any industry anything. It's just it's a
Speaker 1: numbers game.
Speaker 2: Nick, you know who Alan pa is? You do? Okay,
Speaker 2: next one of us?
Speaker 1: It's any one without trying, That's what That's what black
Speaker 1: dudes really feel like. You're trying like that. But yeah,
Speaker 1: there's there's this past Thanksgiving. Just to keep it pretty recent,
Speaker 1: I was floored at the number of people that had
Speaker 1: never tasted or heard of sweet potato pie. Never heard
Speaker 1: of it, never heard of it, they heard a pumpkin pie.
Speaker 1: Pumpkin pie is our culture, is like baseline for a
Speaker 1: holiday pie. Sweet potato pie is baseline, baseline for black
Speaker 1: that's the ceiling. And when people my girl made it,
Speaker 1: and when people tried it, they're like like they were
Speaker 1: just like, why don't people eat this? It was just
Speaker 1: like some of us, like you came out with Kiwi
Speaker 1: or something. They're like, oh, this is some weird you know.
Speaker 1: It was just like try it, but yeah, it's going
Speaker 1: to be popular. But it's like that's the same thing
Speaker 1: with Kwansa. Is Kwanta gonna morph into pumpkin pies? They're
Speaker 1: going to stay sweet potato pie. And that's the question.
Speaker 3: Well, I would love for Patty LaBelle to make my
Speaker 3: kwantas so I'm not.
Speaker 2: Patty LaBelle does Quanta pies. That'd be pretty cool.
Speaker 1: Oh I can't imagine.
Speaker 2: How could that be the crossover we've been waiting for. Patty,
Speaker 2: get on the phone, baby girl. We've been calling you.
Speaker 2: You gotta pick up. We got a lot of ideas
Speaker 2: for you. Patty but more importantly, we want Quanta to
Speaker 2: become very popular. I do worry about it, I guess
Speaker 2: is maybe my my concern is that I do think
Speaker 2: I think about it a lot in terms of larger
Speaker 2: black conversations of how many things do we actually want
Speaker 2: to become as universal as we claim that we do
Speaker 2: that like and it's it's something we see often on
Speaker 2: the Internet where people get upset when our culture becomes
Speaker 2: usurped and we feel like we deserve credit for the
Speaker 2: thing that was a very popular thing with like these
Speaker 2: TikTok dances, where like black kids were creating these choreo, beautiful,
Speaker 2: choreographed dances, and then a white girl would go and
Speaker 2: do it and become much more popular off of this shit,
Speaker 2: And a part of me goes, stop showing these motherfuckers
Speaker 2: that shit, right, just keep it in house.
Speaker 3: Do you do you think that the nature of kwansa though,
Speaker 3: is a little different than even that of a Juneteenth,
Speaker 3: where it's like June teenth is like a celebration of
Speaker 3: a thing that happened in America, so it's able to
Speaker 3: be co opted. Where kwans are specifically created to be
Speaker 3: this like ped African ped africanist, like holiday. I don't
Speaker 3: think that. I so to that, I guess say say
Speaker 3: I don't think it scales up because I don't think
Speaker 3: that they get on board.
Speaker 1: Well, I think I excuse me, I was just having
Speaker 1: this thought. I think the real, real time example that
Speaker 1: we have of it is pride. Look how crossover straight
Speaker 1: white ladies love pride and straight white guys go to
Speaker 1: pride because straight white ladies are a pride And I
Speaker 1: know for a fact gay men that was like I
Speaker 1: used to get my ass kicked, my boyfriend got his
Speaker 1: teeth knocked out because we were holding the hands in
Speaker 1: nineteen eighty two in Green Bay, Wisconsin. And now to
Speaker 1: see those same dudes at our parade, I'm sure infuriates them,
Speaker 1: but they're probably gay, younger LGBTQ plus folks that are like,
Speaker 1: but this is what we want it. So it's the
Speaker 1: it's the price of admission, and the price of admission
Speaker 1: to be accepted by the greater United States or that
Speaker 1: guy's culture, whatever is, you have to give up that
Speaker 1: this is ours, and you have to watch somebody who
Speaker 1: didn't give a fuck about it commodify it and make
Speaker 1: money off it and act like they thought of And
Speaker 1: I think.
Speaker 2: That's really the the where I struggle with it is
Speaker 2: the commodifying. I'm fine with it becoming a commodity we
Speaker 2: all benefit from, but when it starts becoming the type
Speaker 2: of commodity that like, truly only the motherfuckers that didn't
Speaker 2: invest in it in the first place are the ones
Speaker 2: making the money off of it, it gets scary.
Speaker 1: Well, it's every look at the weed business, right, But yeah, it's.
Speaker 3: Gonna be Coca Cola has a Kwanza flavor. And yeah,
Speaker 3: it's hard to know where this starts and stops. But
Speaker 3: I mean, I think that's an American thing more so
Speaker 3: than it's even a black thing. Is It's like, what's
Speaker 3: what's being offered up in culture that isn't eventually going
Speaker 3: to be co opted by corporations?
Speaker 2: I don't know, And that's that's I pray if we
Speaker 2: can wrap this thing up, I pray that Quantza somehow
Speaker 2: becomes the miracle holiday. If there is a miracle inside
Speaker 2: of Quantsa, I think the miracle would be Kwanza some
Speaker 2: by some miracle being the first holiday that remains at
Speaker 2: its core fully black but also gains the popularity that
Speaker 2: it deserves in unifying black people.
Speaker 3: Well, lang Stance is the season I believe in this
Speaker 3: Quanta Dave miracle. Hell yeah, Quanta day a week. What
Speaker 3: do they call the Manura?
Speaker 2: Then the Quanta stick.
Speaker 1: And yet and when you see it at Target and
Speaker 1: it's made by Better Homes and Living. Yeah, you know
Speaker 1: there are no African Americans on that board.
Speaker 2: When has a game for quantity?
Speaker 1: Yeah, Target always wants some white kids.
Speaker 3: Stands up.
Speaker 1: I win, I'm the king of us. Good for him
Speaker 1: because more people know about it. So it's the contant trug.
Speaker 2: Yeah, man, yikes. Al, you want to tell the people
Speaker 2: where they can find you what cool shit you got
Speaker 2: going on?
Speaker 1: You can find me at Al Jackson on I G
Speaker 1: and uh, you can listen to me on Daytime Talk
Speaker 1: after Dark where we uh it's my old Daily Blast
Speaker 1: live show. But we're right here in this here studio.
Speaker 1: Shout out dude, I d K Studios for holding me down.
Speaker 1: Shout out Nick, shout out Jacob. But yeah, and just
Speaker 1: check my website at Al Jackson Live for days, but
Speaker 1: mostly follow me on Instagram.
Speaker 3: Fuck yeah, Cory, cool guy, Joke City seven on Instagram.
Speaker 3: Birth of a Nation on all streaming platforms, Patreon dot
Speaker 3: com back slash.
Speaker 2: Statement bo hell Yeah. Follow me at Langston Kerman on
Speaker 2: all social media platforms, and you can watch my special
Speaker 2: it's called Bad Poetry. It's on Netflix. Watch English Teacher
Speaker 2: It's on FX. And if you want to send us
Speaker 2: your own drops, your own conspiracy theories, if you want
Speaker 2: to tell us what the actual manora for Kwanta is called,
Speaker 2: send it all to Mymama Pod at gmail dot com.
Speaker 2: You can also call us at eight four four Little Moms.
Speaker 2: We would love to hear from you. Hear your sweet
Speaker 2: sweet voices. Send it all, call us rate reviews. Subscribed
Speaker 2: by the merch Celebrate Kwanza, Come On Bye, Bitch. My
Speaker 2: Mama Told Me is a production of Will Ferrell's Big
Speaker 2: Money Players Network and iHeart Podcast.
Speaker 3: Creet it and hosted by Langston correct co hosted by
Speaker 3: David Bori, Executive produced by Will Ferrell, Hansani and Olivia Akilon,
Speaker 3: co produced by Bee Wayne, edited and engineered by Justin Kaffe,
Speaker 3: music by Nick Chambers, artwork by Dogon Kreega.
Speaker 2: You can now watch episodes of My Mama Told Me
Speaker 2: on YouTube. Follow at My Mama Told Me and subscribe
Speaker 2: to our channel.