1 00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:06,680 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio. 2 00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:15,040 Speaker 1: Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. 3 00:00:16,239 --> 00:00:20,439 Speaker 1: Today's tip is that people are a good use of time. 4 00:00:21,840 --> 00:00:26,000 Speaker 1: On this Valentine's Day, we think of romantic love, but 5 00:00:26,079 --> 00:00:29,400 Speaker 1: there are lots of forms of love, and all these 6 00:00:29,440 --> 00:00:35,360 Speaker 1: forms of love benefit from frequency in expressing them. So 7 00:00:35,520 --> 00:00:39,760 Speaker 1: for those you are closest to, aim to create three 8 00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:45,199 Speaker 1: moments of genuine connection each week. You will make your 9 00:00:45,240 --> 00:00:50,080 Speaker 1: loved ones feel good and you will probably be happier too. 10 00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:54,960 Speaker 1: Long time listeners know that one of my favorite time 11 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:59,120 Speaker 1: management rules is that three times a week is a habit. 12 00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:03,640 Speaker 1: Anything we do three times a week is a regular 13 00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:07,840 Speaker 1: part of our lives. This can be a helpful mindset 14 00:01:08,319 --> 00:01:12,600 Speaker 1: in situations where it might be difficult or impossible to 15 00:01:12,680 --> 00:01:17,800 Speaker 1: do something daily. If you travel frequently for work, you 16 00:01:17,920 --> 00:01:20,720 Speaker 1: might not be able to read to your kids every night, 17 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:25,000 Speaker 1: but you probably can read to them three times per week. 18 00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:29,680 Speaker 1: So rather than lament that you often aren't there on 19 00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:33,320 Speaker 1: Tuesday night, you can make the most of the nights 20 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:38,320 Speaker 1: you are there and relish your identity as a dedicated 21 00:01:38,680 --> 00:01:44,160 Speaker 1: bedtime literary guide. I find this is also a helpful 22 00:01:44,200 --> 00:01:47,800 Speaker 1: mindset for connecting with friends and family members who you 23 00:01:47,880 --> 00:01:51,520 Speaker 1: might not spend huge amounts of time with every single day. 24 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:56,480 Speaker 1: With my kids, for instance, I spend a lot of 25 00:01:56,520 --> 00:01:59,720 Speaker 1: time with a toddler by virtue of him being little 26 00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:04,800 Speaker 1: and needing constant care. The four older kids, on the 27 00:02:04,840 --> 00:02:09,000 Speaker 1: other hand, are in school all day and they have activities, 28 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:12,799 Speaker 1: and when they are home, they can often disappear into 29 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:18,040 Speaker 1: their rooms seemingly for days, emerging only when required to 30 00:02:19,120 --> 00:02:23,000 Speaker 1: or to eat. So as I think about my time 31 00:02:23,080 --> 00:02:26,240 Speaker 1: and think about my weeks, I try to engineer at 32 00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:29,800 Speaker 1: least a handful of moments where connection might be possible. 33 00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:36,639 Speaker 1: Often this involves driving a kid somewhere. They don't always 34 00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:38,960 Speaker 1: want to talk in the car, but sometimes they do. 35 00:02:40,520 --> 00:02:44,000 Speaker 1: I like Legos for their own sake, but I definitely 36 00:02:44,120 --> 00:02:47,520 Speaker 1: enjoy the fact that I can do complicated sets with 37 00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:51,600 Speaker 1: my older kids. I find the pieces for each step, 38 00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:56,839 Speaker 1: they put the pieces together. I think about this with 39 00:02:56,919 --> 00:03:00,880 Speaker 1: my husband as well. Even on weeks when we don't 40 00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:03,960 Speaker 1: have a date night, we might be able to eat 41 00:03:04,040 --> 00:03:08,160 Speaker 1: lunch together three times while we are both working from home. 42 00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:13,400 Speaker 1: During the busy years when people are building careers and 43 00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:17,800 Speaker 1: raising families, getting together with friends can be really challenging. 44 00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:22,519 Speaker 1: But if you broaden your actions to connecting in some 45 00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:26,880 Speaker 1: form or another, perhaps you can aim for three moments 46 00:03:26,880 --> 00:03:30,440 Speaker 1: of connection during the week with at least your closest friends. 47 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:35,160 Speaker 1: Maybe you get together once and have one call and 48 00:03:35,240 --> 00:03:40,200 Speaker 1: one text conversation, or maybe it's three texts if it 49 00:03:40,280 --> 00:03:44,320 Speaker 1: is that sort of week, but at least it is frequent. 50 00:03:46,040 --> 00:03:48,320 Speaker 1: So as you think about how you spend your time, 51 00:03:49,240 --> 00:03:52,920 Speaker 1: think about the people you feel closest to. Would it 52 00:03:52,960 --> 00:03:56,960 Speaker 1: be possible to connect in some way three times per week. 53 00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:01,440 Speaker 1: The forms of connection might be front for different people, 54 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:05,840 Speaker 1: but with three as your target, you will generally be 55 00:04:05,920 --> 00:04:09,280 Speaker 1: aiming for a little more than might naturally happen with 56 00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:13,400 Speaker 1: folks who are harder to connect with, but it will 57 00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:20,120 Speaker 1: still feel doable. And when things feel doable, we do them. 58 00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:22,560 Speaker 1: Now I realized for some folks listening to this, it 59 00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:25,800 Speaker 1: might sound a little funny to put numbers on connecting 60 00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:29,600 Speaker 1: with people, or to set targets at all. In this area. 61 00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:32,719 Speaker 1: We should just do what feels authentic. We should seize 62 00:04:32,760 --> 00:04:37,120 Speaker 1: the moment, and that's a great idea. I certainly take 63 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:43,440 Speaker 1: opportunities to connect when they arise, but in our distracted world, 64 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:49,480 Speaker 1: it is easy to do other things. Love is shown 65 00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:55,440 Speaker 1: in ours. Relationships are built on frequency. There are many 66 00:04:55,480 --> 00:05:00,320 Speaker 1: things in life outside our control, but some things are 67 00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:04,960 Speaker 1: in our control. We can't control how people will respond, 68 00:05:05,880 --> 00:05:10,400 Speaker 1: but we can control our actions. Thinking through and planning 69 00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:17,000 Speaker 1: connection helps to make it happen. In the meantime, This 70 00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:21,760 Speaker 1: is Laura. Thanks for listening, and here's to making the 71 00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:31,640 Speaker 1: most of our time. Hey everybody, I'd love to hear 72 00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:34,440 Speaker 1: from you. You can send me your tips, your questions, 73 00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:38,320 Speaker 1: or anything else. Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook 74 00:05:38,400 --> 00:05:43,920 Speaker 1: and Instagram at Before Breakfast pod that's B the number four, 75 00:05:44,440 --> 00:05:47,920 Speaker 1: then Breakfast p o D. You can also shoot me 76 00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:51,640 Speaker 1: an email at Before Breakfast Podcasts at i heeart media 77 00:05:51,720 --> 00:05:54,320 Speaker 1: dot com. That Before Breakfast is spelled out with all 78 00:05:54,360 --> 00:05:57,160 Speaker 1: the letters. Thanks so much, I look forward to staying 79 00:05:57,160 --> 00:06:05,839 Speaker 1: in touch. Before Breakfast is a production of I Heart Radio. 80 00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:09,320 Speaker 1: For more podcasts from I Heart Radio, visit the I 81 00:06:09,440 --> 00:06:12,919 Speaker 1: heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to 82 00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:14,719 Speaker 1: your favorite shows. Yea