Speaker 1: The Nicky Guysers. Hello here I am It's Nicky Guyser podcast. Welcome.
Speaker 1: It is Monday and I'm still fixing my makeup. Um.
Speaker 1: I am in Los Angeles, California. And uh Andrew is
Speaker 1: in St. Louis, Noah is in Arizona. What's up you guys.
Speaker 1: We got the country covered. Uh, there's a special episode.
Speaker 1: We're starting out with Andrew and I together on this
Speaker 1: one because um it's a special sponsored episode by HBO
Speaker 1: Max's new series The S The Sex Secret sex Lives
Speaker 1: of college Girls, The sex Lives of college girls, The
Speaker 1: sex Lives of college girls. Yeah, well they should keep
Speaker 1: it a secret. These girls are up to no good.
Speaker 1: Uh no, the sex lives of college girls. Okay, I
Speaker 1: gotta say I just I wasn't even gonna talk about
Speaker 1: at the top of the show because we don't like
Speaker 1: you just heard me do an ad for it. And
Speaker 1: now we're doing an episode all about college stories and
Speaker 1: uh it's a special fan tax episode where we're just
Speaker 1: gonna listen to your college stories. But um, I do
Speaker 1: really like this show and it's really like quirky and
Speaker 1: fun and has like it's just it's quick moving, good
Speaker 1: acting and I'm kind of inspired by it sexually. Andrew,
Speaker 1: did you watch it? I got the synopsis from Noah.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. I just had to be honest. Uh well, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean that we keep it honest on here. What
Speaker 1: what were you? Why couldn't you watch it? What did
Speaker 1: you watch instead? Curb and I've passed out locking Curb.
Speaker 1: I was, you know, pretty tired, long day of travel,
Speaker 1: and then I I didn't. Yeah, but but it's two
Speaker 1: o'clock there. What did you do to I went to
Speaker 1: Whole Food for for us, and then I took picked
Speaker 1: up your packages for you. Um. I packed for Chicago
Speaker 1: because I have to help Brennan move and I got
Speaker 1: drive the Chicago and drive back. So I was doing
Speaker 1: things other than did you just forget to watch it?
Speaker 1: Four girls have sex in freshman year and you forget
Speaker 1: to watch it? Or did you just say I don't
Speaker 1: want to I didn't. I didn't. Uh, I don't know
Speaker 1: exactly how I know I wanted to watch it. I
Speaker 1: went to watch in the living room real quick, and
Speaker 1: our troubleshooting. You can't watch things real quick, because it's
Speaker 1: that's the problem. I tried to watch it on two
Speaker 1: times fast forward because I, I waited until this morning
Speaker 1: to watch it, and UH and I we were supposed
Speaker 1: to watch it before this episode. No big deal, but um,
Speaker 1: I waited until I had. I left myself an hour
Speaker 1: because I was going to watch two episodes. I thought
Speaker 1: there were half hour there an hour long, which actually
Speaker 1: ends up being great because you know, more is better.
Speaker 1: But then um hbo Max took off the little fast
Speaker 1: forward thing they used to when I was watching Fboy
Speaker 1: Island trying to cruise through, I was doing double time
Speaker 1: or at least one point five. But they make you
Speaker 1: watch it in the same speed, um, which is better
Speaker 1: because this show does move fast and it's like almost
Speaker 1: like thirty rock level jokes of like like it's they're
Speaker 1: fast moving and that's what I like about it. Um No,
Speaker 1: you watched it, did you like it? Yeah? I especially
Speaker 1: liked the uh plot twist at the end of episode one.
Speaker 1: That's what I was into too, because I was ready
Speaker 1: to about it as I watched, and I was like,
Speaker 1: you know, I might not get through the first episode.
Speaker 1: I'm like on a time crunch. And she was like,
Speaker 1: I'm wait till you get to the end. You'll be
Speaker 1: very invested. And I did not see that coming, and
Speaker 1: I feel like, uh, that's why I feel like sexually
Speaker 1: empowered by the show that I thought was going to be. Like,
Speaker 1: I don't know. Sometimes I don't want to watch things
Speaker 1: about college else because I get jealous because that seems
Speaker 1: like such a fun time that I kind of missed
Speaker 1: out on because I was not doing I was like
Speaker 1: doing comedy and just kind of tapped out. And um,
Speaker 1: this is Uh, everyone will find some character to relate
Speaker 1: to in this as a girl or even a guy like, um,
Speaker 1: it's fun. I'm excited about the show and I'm in
Speaker 1: that I need to be forced to watch shows. This
Speaker 1: is like a good thing for me. We should get
Speaker 1: more sponsored shows because I will get into more teaving.
Speaker 1: I'm in, so it will be a great Thank you
Speaker 1: for getting my packages though, Andrew, I appreciate it. Did
Speaker 1: anything fun? Cam Actually uh six things? Um, I had
Speaker 1: to use a blue cart so that took time. I
Speaker 1: told you you only had to get the two. I
Speaker 1: only said the ones at the beginning. The ones at
Speaker 1: the beginning are the ones I'm getting fees. I'm sorry
Speaker 1: it wasn't able to U decipher that because it's in
Speaker 1: like it all is under one phone number. So it's like,
Speaker 1: I know, but the ones at the beginning of the
Speaker 1: are it's okay, but I appreciate. I mean it's more
Speaker 1: than okay. You've got them also, thank you, but I
Speaker 1: was trying to make it as easy as possible for you.
Speaker 1: I'm thank you. But I think the show you never
Speaker 1: got laid in your dorm? Did you or did you
Speaker 1: ever even have any sexual experience? Really touched myself in
Speaker 1: my dorm. One time, my friend and a girl were
Speaker 1: watching me masterbate um through like at one point, Uh,
Speaker 1: someone was drunk and we kicked like the metal part
Speaker 1: of the door so you could see through our door,
Speaker 1: and I was like jerking off to the one porn
Speaker 1: I owned, and uh, they were watching I think the
Speaker 1: whole time. What was the porn you owned? Yeah? Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was trying to think what it was. That's every
Speaker 1: guy had one porn, Okay, construction workers, girls gone Wild? No,
Speaker 1: but I met the girls gone Wild guy in college,
Speaker 1: the guy that went to prison. Yeah, yeah, I could
Speaker 1: see why he did, just by the interaction. He had
Speaker 1: a bus and he was like going up to drunk
Speaker 1: college girls. That's what they would do. I mean, it
Speaker 1: was so fucked up, and he was like, hey, I
Speaker 1: don't even know if he ended up dating my buddy's
Speaker 1: ex girlfriend, and uh, yeah, I don't know anyways, but yeah,
Speaker 1: that guy he uh yeah, did you hang out with him?
Speaker 1: I bet you were like kind of trying to be
Speaker 1: friends with them. I mean, that guy was cool for
Speaker 1: a while because girls just like I wanted to hook
Speaker 1: up with him. Flash him he got hot chicks because
Speaker 1: hot chicks wouldn't be on camera. Oh yeah, no, no,
Speaker 1: we're still besties. We definitely, Uh how did you run
Speaker 1: into him? He just came into There's a bar called
Speaker 1: the Boot in New Orleans at two Lane where it's
Speaker 1: just like the biggest it's it's the number two Ernie,
Speaker 1: or at least it was the number two I think
Speaker 1: about all the bars in New Orleans, and it was
Speaker 1: number two behind Pat O'Brien's of like money making. So
Speaker 1: it was just packed, and you know, they just drive
Speaker 1: the bus up around like one am to get these
Speaker 1: drunk college girls to do fucking shit on camera that
Speaker 1: they'll regret the rest of their life, you know, because
Speaker 1: I think they just paid them in like pizza, and
Speaker 1: they they got drunk and then they signed a release,
Speaker 1: I'm sure. I mean, yeah it was. I feel like
Speaker 1: I relate to these girls in this show because they're
Speaker 1: especially the girl Bella, who is trying to get on
Speaker 1: the uh the cool like Harvard Lampoon style paper, like
Speaker 1: the like SNL writers all right on this one. It's
Speaker 1: like a fake college that they're all going to that's
Speaker 1: made up for the show. But it's like kind of
Speaker 1: like this prestigious college that has this really cool comedy
Speaker 1: newspaper that she's trying to get on, and it's like
Speaker 1: a boy's club and it's all boy comedy writers and
Speaker 1: they're like, we already have two girls on staff. Sorry.
Speaker 1: So it's really interesting to see the politics of how
Speaker 1: she's going to try to get into the comedy world.
Speaker 1: UM like her. At first they're like you need to
Speaker 1: call the a c l U and like complained that
Speaker 1: they said that there was only two girls on the
Speaker 1: paper and like this is sexist. And then another girl's
Speaker 1: like just be cool and try to be like one
Speaker 1: of the guys, like try to get them to like you,
Speaker 1: because if they do that, then the what you're around.
Speaker 1: It was just interesting, um techniques for how to get in,
Speaker 1: and then she ends up giving a bunch of hand jobs,
Speaker 1: which I also love because she did the same thing
Speaker 1: I did, which is like she is also hasn't is
Speaker 1: very inexperienced, and it's just like I'm just want to
Speaker 1: like do weird things, and like she's like thrilled by
Speaker 1: giving six hand jobs. She doesn't feel like sad about it. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna watch the show. I had no idea. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's not like girls where you're gonna see a lot
Speaker 1: of awkward sex and like nudity. It's more like, um,
Speaker 1: you know, you you see like you see guys kind
Speaker 1: of their faces when they orgasm and her kind of
Speaker 1: like you furiously vigorously jerking. But it's a it's a
Speaker 1: quick montage. It's not like these uncomfortable sex moments. But
Speaker 1: it's just really funny and it has that thirty rock
Speaker 1: it's you know, it's Mindy Kaling wrote it. So I'm
Speaker 1: guessing this girl, Bella is based off of her trying
Speaker 1: to like navigate the comedy world. And she has a
Speaker 1: Bella has a poster of Seth Meyers on her wall
Speaker 1: of like who she's in love with, and uh yeah,
Speaker 1: it just kind of um. Yeah. Then there's this other
Speaker 1: girl that's like, really she's poor, and so that she's
Speaker 1: and she's also like she slipped with this guy who
Speaker 1: like abandons her right after she sleeps with it. Like
Speaker 1: it's also stuff I'm already talking about, and I wish
Speaker 1: girls would figure out sooner. So I'm kind of glad
Speaker 1: that this is out there for girls to see. And um, yeah,
Speaker 1: and there's a good plot twist at the end. I'm
Speaker 1: I'm gonna keep going. It's cute. It's so cute. I
Speaker 1: want to be on it, but I don't want to
Speaker 1: be a parent because like all the people I know
Speaker 1: and it are playing parents. It's like Rob Hubill and um,
Speaker 1: Nicole Mill Nicole from Mad TV, and um, what's her name?
Speaker 1: Plays this senator who's she's a Sherry Shepherd is playing
Speaker 1: the one of the girl's moms, so like all of
Speaker 1: my I mean, those people are a little bit older
Speaker 1: than me. But I don't know i'd be I'd be
Speaker 1: like a I don't know, a soccer coach or something,
Speaker 1: which is a whole other thing. Then there's a Jesus
Speaker 1: Christ no, like I felt was so good. I mean
Speaker 1: that that storyline, Okay, So if you if you weren't
Speaker 1: sold on it. Now I'm not. I'm not even I
Speaker 1: don't need to even do this. They didn't ask me
Speaker 1: to talk about the show like that much. But I
Speaker 1: just I just got done watching it some kind of
Speaker 1: into it. Um, how's St. Louis Andrews Louis is good?
Speaker 1: I mean it's cold. Uh. We were just in San
Speaker 1: Diego and then Angele You're like, oh yeah, okay, okay, alright, alright,
Speaker 1: weather here you are. But I like, I mean, I
Speaker 1: like it here. There's nothing really going on. Um, I'm
Speaker 1: trying to think of anything has gone on here. I mean,
Speaker 1: I'm just here alone. So I go to Starbucks. Nothing
Speaker 1: weird happened there, and then I walked back, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean? Like that's that's why St. Louis is
Speaker 1: great though, or like it's it's like, oh, I didn't
Speaker 1: see anything that's gonna scar my life for a week.
Speaker 1: What did you see in l a that's going to
Speaker 1: scar your life besides my legs without spray? That in
Speaker 1: a meal's chest hair, I mean it was pretty. I
Speaker 1: was looking at a meal. I was looking at a
Speaker 1: meal because we share a room by choice. Actually, everyone's like,
Speaker 1: how could you I was like, yeah, no, we want
Speaker 1: to be in there together in San Diego because in
Speaker 1: in l A we had a house and we each
Speaker 1: had our own bedroom. But then in San Diego you
Speaker 1: and a Meal were in the same hotel and I
Speaker 1: was looking over and uh, it was like seven am
Speaker 1: and the sun is just coming through the window and
Speaker 1: it's like half on it. He looks So I took
Speaker 1: a photo. I guess send it to you. He looks angelic,
Speaker 1: just sleeping and he snores like I look, you know,
Speaker 1: like he's snore. I look over and I'm like, is
Speaker 1: a Meal like a fat guy in a skinny outfit
Speaker 1: or like a skinny body. I don't know. He snores
Speaker 1: like he's a skinny you know. It's pretty cool. But
Speaker 1: like I did the same ship, like we both think
Speaker 1: we're dying in the middle of the night. And but
Speaker 1: I just looked over and here he probably doesn't I
Speaker 1: think he does, or he's starting to um get there.
Speaker 1: But yeah, just uh, I was just looking at the
Speaker 1: lighting of his face. He looked like a little like
Speaker 1: g if what Jesus I think would look like yeah,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, like because he's you know,
Speaker 1: he's Arabic or half Arabic and like or whatever, and
Speaker 1: he's just got his where's where where's he? His dad from?
Speaker 1: His dad is from Lebanon and no, I was asking
Speaker 1: you just to see if you knew I knew, but
Speaker 1: I'm glad you knew that. And his mom is from
Speaker 1: the suburbs, so if anyone's gonna it was a fun
Speaker 1: time us three living together at the house and then um, yeah,
Speaker 1: you guys shared a hotel room. Uh. In San Diego.
Speaker 1: We had two shows in San Diego. Jason Braz performed
Speaker 1: with us on the early show, which was such a
Speaker 1: treat because Anya is old friends with him. She used
Speaker 1: to open for him on the road. Um, and he
Speaker 1: lives an hour away from San Diego, and so he
Speaker 1: he I think, asked Anya if he could get tickets,
Speaker 1: and then I was like, can he come backstage and
Speaker 1: hang out? And then can he actually perform with us?
Speaker 1: So I got to like do a little comedy bit
Speaker 1: with Jason Raz and sing with him, and he was
Speaker 1: so nice and so cool. Andrew, I mean it was
Speaker 1: I walked in and you know, you're like, yeah, he's
Speaker 1: a big fan, and I was like trying to play cool,
Speaker 1: but not play it cool. You know, like the right away,
Speaker 1: I go, hey, you know, and I'm yours um. When
Speaker 1: he's looking at the tongue in the mirror, what does
Speaker 1: that mean? And He's like, whatever, whatever you want it
Speaker 1: to mean. And I was like, come on, fucking idiot,
Speaker 1: I'm such a loser asking my question what am I doing?
Speaker 1: I have stared at my tongue in the mirror and like,
Speaker 1: have you ever done the thing where you're like, your
Speaker 1: tongue looks like a little animal Like it's like can
Speaker 1: you make it look like it's like peering around, like
Speaker 1: it's like like scared, Like you can go like like
Speaker 1: your tongue becomes if you do it enough, if you
Speaker 1: look at your tongue in the mirror and move it
Speaker 1: around you and start to see it as like a
Speaker 1: little rodent in a hole that's like like scared to
Speaker 1: come out and like and like search like it has
Speaker 1: the twitchy movements of a little mole rat thing the
Speaker 1: tongue when there's a thing on TikTok where people are
Speaker 1: touching the bottom of the tongue. I don't know if
Speaker 1: it makes you horny or whatever, but I feel like
Speaker 1: the tongue really makes if you start touching your tongue
Speaker 1: like oh, we're like we're animals, Like huh, well, it's
Speaker 1: just such a huge muscle that you can manipulate. And
Speaker 1: I didn't know, but you can teach your tongue how
Speaker 1: to do the two, like I could do the one
Speaker 1: and make it a taco. Oh yeah, that one. But
Speaker 1: there's a there's a technique that you really wait, hold on,
Speaker 1: let me see what are you laughing? They look that
Speaker 1: go from TikTok. Be able to do it. I don't
Speaker 1: know why I can't do it anymore. Um. Well, I'm
Speaker 1: still in Los Angeles. It's good. I mean you're at
Speaker 1: the hotel. Yeah, uh, nothing to report here. Um. I
Speaker 1: just filmed a lot yesterday for a thing, and um
Speaker 1: drove back from San Diego. Um had someone drive me,
Speaker 1: which is super nice. I drove down there with Andrew
Speaker 1: drove us. I slept on the way down there on Saturday.
Speaker 1: And then yesterday, Uh, this show that I'm working on,
Speaker 1: they had a production assistant coming meet me at the
Speaker 1: hotel and then drive my car and I just got
Speaker 1: to be in the back seat like and they were like, Nikki,
Speaker 1: we want you to get some sleep. And I was
Speaker 1: like honestly, I just want to be on my phone,
Speaker 1: like I haven't had any time to just scroll and
Speaker 1: be worthless. But you know what I did is I
Speaker 1: watched I just got into like trust sing YouTube to
Speaker 1: suggest things for me and just like letting it roll
Speaker 1: because I think I left the room at one point
Speaker 1: when I was watching a video and it went to
Speaker 1: the next one, and I was like, they kind of
Speaker 1: nailed it. And now I'm I'm really into watching stories
Speaker 1: of like disfigurement or people that like lose a bunch
Speaker 1: of limbs or like become completely disfigured and like their
Speaker 1: partners staying with them and like the Triumphs. And I
Speaker 1: just watched one that I really recommend, and it's the
Speaker 1: it's like the incredible story of Alex Lewis Alex l
Speaker 1: e w I s. He's a guy that got this
Speaker 1: and skin infection that caused him to lose all of
Speaker 1: his limbs except like up to his elbow on on
Speaker 1: one arm and like a stump on the other and
Speaker 1: stumps for legs and half of his face and he
Speaker 1: has this It's it's just an incredible story and I
Speaker 1: really loved it. And then I watched, um something about
Speaker 1: like the Michael Jackson docu. Oh you know what is
Speaker 1: so good that everyone needs to watch before we get
Speaker 1: into your fan th rex college stories. I can't recommend
Speaker 1: it enough. Tony Bennett um is five and he has
Speaker 1: Alzheimer's and he just performed his last concert ever at
Speaker 1: Radio City Music Hall with uh Lady Gaga and he
Speaker 1: is like, you know, he doesn't remember. He's like he's
Speaker 1: had Alzheimer's for like a couple of years now. So
Speaker 1: it's pretty much it's it's taken hold, you know. And
Speaker 1: it's a sixty minutes piece of Anderson Cooper following Tony
Speaker 1: Bennett on his final concert. And I promise you maybe
Speaker 1: that doesn't sell you on it. It is a tear jerker.
Speaker 1: It is inspirational, it's beautiful, it's sad, it's so good
Speaker 1: and um, it's like my new thing that I'm recommending
Speaker 1: to everyone. So check out the Tony Bennett Lady Gaga thing.
Speaker 1: It's so good. He only remembers things when music comes on,
Speaker 1: and then he like everything comes back and he can
Speaker 1: remember everything. And he's just like such a showman at
Speaker 1: the age of ninety five. It's pretty incredible. I wonder
Speaker 1: why why that happened, because like with people with Tourette's
Speaker 1: can also like when they're focused on something, singing or
Speaker 1: playing basketball or a stutter. Yeah, it's wild. It's wild
Speaker 1: how the brain works like that. Well, my foot pain
Speaker 1: goes away when I'm performing, and the second I walk
Speaker 1: off stage my feet are killing me. It's just the
Speaker 1: instant my footsteps off of the light. It's like I
Speaker 1: rip off my shoes, but until them, I don't. I
Speaker 1: don't feel it at all. And I'm on stage for
Speaker 1: two hours. It's very bizarre. Um, but they actually talk
Speaker 1: about why this, like his um, his doctor actually talks
Speaker 1: about why this is and the phenomenon of it. So
Speaker 1: it's it's a really fascinating piece and it's you know,
Speaker 1: fifteen minutes long. All right, let's take a quick break
Speaker 1: and we'll get back with fan trax. Your college story.
Speaker 1: All right, we're back every time we're doing all college stories.
Speaker 1: I know, I love it too. Him just in the
Speaker 1: living room with a sheet over a blanket over his head,
Speaker 1: but there wasn't any like music behind it at the time.
Speaker 1: And then from there here, Hey, what you mind, um,
Speaker 1: you know, uh grabbing a clicker for me? Thanks? Uh,
Speaker 1: this is a special episode of all fan tracks, and
Speaker 1: it's going to be all of your college stories. We
Speaker 1: solicited Andrew put out a video on our um you know,
Speaker 1: Nikki Glazer pod Instagram page and asked for your college stories.
Speaker 1: You know, good for you if you remember stuff from college. Uh,
Speaker 1: so let's get to it. Let's hear from you guys
Speaker 1: and hear some stories. No what you said, they're really good, right,
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, they're so funny. Oh yes, they can't wait. Okay,
Speaker 1: let's get started. All right, let's start with Brian. So
Speaker 1: here's my memory from college. I went to school for woodworking,
Speaker 1: so um, it ended up being an all guys school.
Speaker 1: Even though it wasn't an all guys school. Um, we
Speaker 1: had guys above us that were recording rap music all
Speaker 1: day every day until you know, two or three in
Speaker 1: the morning, listening to the same hip hop beat over
Speaker 1: and over and over again. A bunch of guys in
Speaker 1: the dorm got really piste about it. So I went
Speaker 1: to the janitor's closet and got some buckets, and for
Speaker 1: like two days piste and shipped in these buckets, and
Speaker 1: then one night compiled all the buckets into a trash can,
Speaker 1: leaned it against the guy's door, knocked on the door,
Speaker 1: and ran away. So when he opened the door, this
Speaker 1: entire trash can full of pists and ship flooded his
Speaker 1: dorm um. I was right below, so it came through
Speaker 1: his floor and my ceiling, and uh, you know, not
Speaker 1: only did I have to suffer through this hip hop
Speaker 1: beat that was on loop, but all of my bedding
Speaker 1: and clothes and everything like that were covered in pists
Speaker 1: and ship. There was no washer and dryer on campus,
Speaker 1: so I had to bring it all home to mom's
Speaker 1: house that weekend. Oh my god, I love a guy
Speaker 1: who doesn't waste sheets, even though they have waste on them.
Speaker 1: Wait a second, did this guy take was? Was he
Speaker 1: a part of shipping and pissing in the bucket? I
Speaker 1: kind of missed that. It didn't sound like he was.
Speaker 1: He just seems just like the guys. How do they should?
Speaker 1: I mean, that is a they could be charged for that.
Speaker 1: That's a biological yeah, I think. I mean that dropped
Speaker 1: through the floor into his betting. Uh, I mean that
Speaker 1: is so disgusting. I am horrified. I am I am speechless.
Speaker 1: How that guy's music I'm gonna get I'm gonna get
Speaker 1: some pisting ship on my door because of the sounds
Speaker 1: that just made me make at this hotel room I'm in,
Speaker 1: I'm so it was just I cannot believe how disgusting
Speaker 1: that is. What I mean, kind of an interesting um
Speaker 1: technique home alone type of contraption, you know, homemade like,
Speaker 1: but that is so disgusting and also like, just man,
Speaker 1: that makes the second I heard that, I go the
Speaker 1: things that have happened in this world are like, it
Speaker 1: just opens up a world to me that I hadn't
Speaker 1: even considered of pranking people with buckets of piss and ship.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, that's probably a common thing, okay, but
Speaker 1: how many times do you think they went to the
Speaker 1: door and we're like, hey, can you like not play
Speaker 1: this at two in the morning. We're trying to sleep,
Speaker 1: we're trying to study, we're trying to do keg stands
Speaker 1: like you're really fucking with us, Like it seemed pretty
Speaker 1: selfish to blast music that no one wants to hear
Speaker 1: in a dorm. I don't know. I feel like maybe
Speaker 1: I understand, but I and I know you probably might
Speaker 1: have done something like this in your college years, but
Speaker 1: I do not think the crime and that he fits
Speaker 1: the punishment at all here that is so disgusting. And honestly,
Speaker 1: I bet it was like, you know, I bet they
Speaker 1: were no one is quiet in college. I but he
Speaker 1: was doing something in response to them being loud too.
Speaker 1: Like It's like, but I have you ever experienced that
Speaker 1: where someone just plays a song over and over? Besides
Speaker 1: me with Taylor Swift, But yeah, I mean those guys
Speaker 1: shipped on his dream for sure. I have I ever
Speaker 1: done well, we did stuff in fraternity life where it's
Speaker 1: like that kind of ship like but I'm just trying
Speaker 1: to think of Like I remember one weekend when I
Speaker 1: was staying in Venice with my ex boyfriend and we
Speaker 1: were in a major, major fight, like it was breakup times,
Speaker 1: but we had no I had no car, nowhere to go,
Speaker 1: and I had to stay at this place and we
Speaker 1: were just stuck. It was July four and we were
Speaker 1: stuck in this apartment together in the studio apartment, and
Speaker 1: like it, we just weren't talking. It was the end,
Speaker 1: and but there was nowhere for either of us to go.
Speaker 1: And I remember there was this party next door that
Speaker 1: kept blasting uh Kanye's song Click. There's a lot of
Speaker 1: different you know artists on it. I think jay z
Speaker 1: is on it, Uh maybe not a And anyway, it's
Speaker 1: a great song. And I ended up being so grateful
Speaker 1: that I got to know that song over that weekend
Speaker 1: because I just remember that was kind of the soundtrack
Speaker 1: to our that weekend of just being stuck somewhere with
Speaker 1: someone that just hates you and you both are like
Speaker 1: breaking up but no one said it yet, and like
Speaker 1: it was. It was the worst. It was the worst
Speaker 1: situation I've ever been in with a boyfriend. And but
Speaker 1: Click was playing and then I got really into that
Speaker 1: song as as hot as that click. Yeah. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: such a good song if you haven't checked it out.
Speaker 1: Um yeah, but my relationship was a bunch of ship
Speaker 1: in a bucket that weekend. Um, all right, let's get
Speaker 1: to the next pand Rex. Okay, here's one from Joanna. Hey, Nikki, Andrew, Noah,
Speaker 1: this is Joanna. I just thought insto story, um about
Speaker 1: college memories, and I was thinking, does anyone actually have
Speaker 1: any clear college memories? Just kidding No, I actually didn't
Speaker 1: pretady that much in school. Um, but what I was
Speaker 1: was totally checked out by my fourth year, Like I
Speaker 1: just wanted my diploma get the hell out of there,
Speaker 1: and I had this project. It was really similar, and
Speaker 1: this is probably why this is top of mind for me.
Speaker 1: I was watching scenes from my marriage. In the very
Speaker 1: first episode, there's a college student interviewing an interfaith couple,
Speaker 1: and that's what I was meant to do for this project.
Speaker 1: I was like reaching out to people by email. I
Speaker 1: had my professor connect me with an interfaith couple, and
Speaker 1: no one would respond. I couldn't get anyone to sit
Speaker 1: down with me. It was around the holidays. I was
Speaker 1: trying to get this out the door, and I was like,
Speaker 1: fuck it, I'm going to be using pseudonyms anyway, right,
Speaker 1: So I decided to make up a couple, and every
Speaker 1: quote in that paper was completely made up. I guess
Speaker 1: I'm way more creative than I ever thought possible, because
Speaker 1: I got a pretty good grade on it. And it's
Speaker 1: something that like simultaneously haunts me but also makes me
Speaker 1: laugh every time I think about it. But anyway, thanks
Speaker 1: for putting on the pot every day. I love you guys.
Speaker 1: Hope to see you live sometime soon. I'm in New England,
Speaker 1: so maybe Connecticut. We'll see all right. Bye? I hope
Speaker 1: to see you too. Thank you for that. Yeah that
Speaker 1: is I like how she says it haunts her, but
Speaker 1: she's also like kind of proud because yes, so much
Speaker 1: of college is this like just under the gun. I
Speaker 1: have to get this thing done. I fucking am too
Speaker 1: depressed or too drunk or too hungover or to whatever
Speaker 1: to actually do it. And then you just sometimes you cheat,
Speaker 1: sometimes you fib that. I like that. She's probably of
Speaker 1: an honest person, so that's why bugs so that she
Speaker 1: like had to lie. But also what a what an
Speaker 1: exercise in creating and writing fiction? You know, like what
Speaker 1: was she saying in her faith? In her faith? What
Speaker 1: does that mean? Does that mean two different means? Like
Speaker 1: two different things? Yeah, oh man, I want to hear
Speaker 1: her quotes as a Jew, like I just like it's
Speaker 1: like so like jenner Rick, she just writes all men
Speaker 1: at the end of everything. The wife says, she's like,
Speaker 1: I don't know what Catholics actually do? Um that is
Speaker 1: uh yeah, I like just cheating essentially. Yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: I know that was your emma. I mean that's all
Speaker 1: I did. Yeah. I I got a paper, a twenty
Speaker 1: page term paper. I just my buddy sent it to
Speaker 1: me from his college and I just changed the name
Speaker 1: on top pretty much. Yeah, and like I had to
Speaker 1: change like seven words and I definitely should have changed more.
Speaker 1: And I got like a B minus And I was
Speaker 1: like mad at my buddy for like not being smarter.
Speaker 1: That is wild, Like why did we do that more
Speaker 1: of just like I guess that sometimes the assignments were
Speaker 1: so specifically or just you know, like trade papers across
Speaker 1: state lines, you know, like, oh, I wrote this paper
Speaker 1: about Chaucer for there's gotta be you know, but I guess,
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm almost happy didn't. I couldn't do it internet,
Speaker 1: Like we still had to like go through books. Like
Speaker 1: now with the Internet, I don't see how you could
Speaker 1: not plagiarize or just because well now they can catch you,
Speaker 1: because I think that so much is uploaded electronically that
Speaker 1: it's scaled. It would probably scan every paper that's on
Speaker 1: this database for any kind of you know, repeat sentences
Speaker 1: or word structures, and then they would be able to
Speaker 1: bust you. If I bet there's some kind of with
Speaker 1: technology you could cheat easier, but you can also get caught.
Speaker 1: I mean because I did a paper once. I did
Speaker 1: a paper once, um for physics. It was quantum physics.
Speaker 1: You know, I don't know why I picked that. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, I pretty much plagiarized. I mean, like I
Speaker 1: definitely did not understand it by the end. And when
Speaker 1: I got my paper back, I got a big red
Speaker 1: F on it. And on the last page my professor
Speaker 1: was like, do you even understand what you wrote? At
Speaker 1: least you didn't getting caught plagiarizing, Like, at least you
Speaker 1: just thought you were stupid as opposed to a cheater,
Speaker 1: Because I think that is like the most humiliating thing
Speaker 1: is being caught lying, and it's just like such a lie.
Speaker 1: I would feel. I never cheated in that way of
Speaker 1: of stealing someone else's paper, thank god, but like, I, uh, yeah,
Speaker 1: that I would feel. Oh god, did you ever feel
Speaker 1: like a lot of guilt? Andrew Um. I think underneath
Speaker 1: it all, I might have wanted to get caught, to
Speaker 1: just be able to start over and maybe get help.
Speaker 1: I think that might have been the underlying reason of like,
Speaker 1: because I wasn't going to class, I was very depressed.
Speaker 1: I had horrible anxiety. I couldn't sit in the classroom
Speaker 1: without having a panic attack. But I didn't really know
Speaker 1: what it was so I just cheated and I thought okay,
Speaker 1: like so, like I really didn't feel like I had
Speaker 1: a choice but to cheat to get by, like so
Speaker 1: it didn't. I didn't really feel guilty about it for
Speaker 1: some reason, because is it weird that I trust you
Speaker 1: us because I know that you cheated so easily that like,
Speaker 1: and I feel like you would you still do that?
Speaker 1: Have you? Like, would you go back at a polity? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Have you changed? Like it makes me go God, I
Speaker 1: don't know if he what if he would cheat like
Speaker 1: like or just I feel like you could lie easier
Speaker 1: than I thought before. Um, yeah, this is all like
Speaker 1: you're more honest with it with with lies now because
Speaker 1: I feel like I've I don't think I've caught you
Speaker 1: in a lie, and I feel like either you're really
Speaker 1: good at it or you just don't do it now. Um,
Speaker 1: I mean no, I think I like have changed tremendously
Speaker 1: from that moment. Like I think, uh so much of
Speaker 1: the cheating was just caused by not being able to
Speaker 1: be productive without it, So it's like now I don't Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't see how you know, I picked a profession
Speaker 1: that works for me and so I don't have to
Speaker 1: cheat I could just that was the whole reason why
Speaker 1: I love comedy and doing stand up because I performed
Speaker 1: it and I couldn't. You couldn't cheat, or I couldn't
Speaker 1: um copy someone else or one you get called out
Speaker 1: for copying jokes um. But like that's why I loved
Speaker 1: it so much. I didn't rely on anyone else except
Speaker 1: for myself on stage, and that's why. Yeah. But I
Speaker 1: don't mean like cheating and comedy. I mean like cheating
Speaker 1: just it's what cheating is is a micro It's it's
Speaker 1: a lie. Yeah, yeah, I mean, no, I hear you.
Speaker 1: I mean yeah, I mean I do you try not
Speaker 1: to lie? I mean because I I feel like I
Speaker 1: try not to. But it's just sometimes you just want
Speaker 1: to give people what they fucking want, and it's easier
Speaker 1: to just be like I loved it or whatever the
Speaker 1: funk is. I think what happens is I wouldn't lie
Speaker 1: or or feel that way if I felt like the
Speaker 1: reaction from the other well, that's why everyone lies. Andrew.
Speaker 1: I know, I'm just telling you that to avoid the reaction.
Speaker 1: And I know you're saying that I lie to you
Speaker 1: because I'm scared of you. But the thing is we've
Speaker 1: gotten into this before. What's so bad about a no?
Speaker 1: Or like what you don't want to hear? I think
Speaker 1: you're scared of what you don't want to hear, which
Speaker 1: is scary, but it's um but the person that that
Speaker 1: person is entitled to tell you what they feel, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, And I have to remember that
Speaker 1: too sometimes of like if I tell someone what they
Speaker 1: want to hear because or what they don't want to hear,
Speaker 1: and I know what they want to hear, but I
Speaker 1: just don't think they look good in that outfit, and
Speaker 1: I know they don't have anything else, but I can't
Speaker 1: be like, you look great, so I go, um, it's okay,
Speaker 1: and then they go and then they're mad, and yeah
Speaker 1: that then they're entitled to be mad, just as I
Speaker 1: am entitled to not like them in that and I'm
Speaker 1: entitled to react to them being mad by by like lying,
Speaker 1: not lying by not even like like if if that person,
Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't know exactly how to explain it.
Speaker 1: All I'm saying is that like the reaction, Yeah, that
Speaker 1: person is entitled to whatever fucking reaction they want. But
Speaker 1: if I think it's um uh, not a nice reaction
Speaker 1: or or um like not consider it. Then then I'm
Speaker 1: not even I don't know, so it's like, yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: just saying it's not a good excuse to lie, to
Speaker 1: be like because I well, it's because I just didn't
Speaker 1: want the reaction. I mean, that's why everyone lies, I guess,
Speaker 1: but I don't know. But I think there's like white lies,
Speaker 1: and then I don't know. I feel like there's times
Speaker 1: where people can lie where the reaction is so harsh
Speaker 1: that like the lie is almost okay for me if
Speaker 1: it's a white lie, if it's like it justifies it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because but this is not worth the other end. I've
Speaker 1: done that before, to where it's like this person is
Speaker 1: going to be mad at me for three days and
Speaker 1: I can either just like not be dishonest and a
Speaker 1: little that's not gonna because then how you're saying it
Speaker 1: is like then like the lie is so fucking bad,
Speaker 1: but the reaction is like, well, that's people's reaction, you
Speaker 1: know what I means. So then it's like, well, I'm
Speaker 1: just saying, you know, I don't like to life, not
Speaker 1: because of the other person, but for myself because when
Speaker 1: I lie, it's like betraying who I am. If someone goes,
Speaker 1: did you like my movie? And I'm like, yeah, it's
Speaker 1: like that is a self betrayal that that compounds over
Speaker 1: time and makes me less happy. I feel it's not
Speaker 1: about like a tangent. Yeah, but I do feel like though,
Speaker 1: then to lie truth in that moment and it's going
Speaker 1: to hurt them, that could be. That could be selfish
Speaker 1: on your part because you can't deal with you're lying,
Speaker 1: so you're going to tell them the truth, which is
Speaker 1: actually gonna maybe hurt them, even though it's subjective. I'm serious.
Speaker 1: Pick up that book Lying by Sam Harris. It's on
Speaker 1: the shelf, and they have an argument for why you
Speaker 1: should never lie, and it's just it's just ironclad. There's
Speaker 1: just no excuse to ever lie unless you know. There's
Speaker 1: like one example where he said, it's okay to lie.
Speaker 1: It's if you're you know, a small child runs to
Speaker 1: your house because someone's chasing them to murder them, and
Speaker 1: the guy comes to your the murderer comes to your
Speaker 1: house and says, is the child in your house right now?
Speaker 1: And you actually don't have to lie. You can say
Speaker 1: I don't want to answer that. You don't even have
Speaker 1: to live with then. But that's the only times if
Speaker 1: you're like protecting someone's life and like there's violence, Uh,
Speaker 1: there's someone there's something I immediately in front of you
Speaker 1: that's like a violent act that if you if you lie,
Speaker 1: it's going to preserve your life. That's the only time.
Speaker 1: But really you can just say I don't I don't
Speaker 1: want to answer that, I don't have to answer that,
Speaker 1: or you can just shut the door. That's not a lie. Um,
Speaker 1: all right, moving on, alright, let's talk about our favorite topic, drinking. Hey, pstis,
Speaker 1: I saw some story that you want stories from college,
Speaker 1: So here is my submission. So it used to be
Speaker 1: captain of the cheerleading team. No big deal. So, um,
Speaker 1: so we were a competitive cheerleading team in college, and
Speaker 1: we had a competition coming up that's kind of like
Speaker 1: our big end of your thing that we've been working
Speaker 1: towards all year. And we had kind of told their
Speaker 1: co chis or agreed to just like not drink for
Speaker 1: the month and like we're going to hunker down and
Speaker 1: take care of our bodies and like just really be
Speaker 1: ready for this competition and do well. So like the
Speaker 1: week before we leave for this competition, Um, it's this
Speaker 1: one girl's birthday, and we're all kind of like, okay, well,
Speaker 1: like we're going to have a party for her. So
Speaker 1: we just like all decide that we're just not going
Speaker 1: to tell anybody, Like we're not going to tell the coaches,
Speaker 1: We're not going to post anything on Facebook, because I
Speaker 1: think it was like Facebook at the time with like
Speaker 1: sixty photos per album type chip um like, Okay, we're
Speaker 1: just gonna be secretive and go have fun and then
Speaker 1: go to this competition. So when she leaders drank, they
Speaker 1: start to stunt, and stunting when you're drinking is like
Speaker 1: super fucking dangerous and long short end up putting his
Speaker 1: head through a glass kitchen table and was passed and
Speaker 1: couldn't compete. So we got thanks best. Oh damn. Oh,
Speaker 1: I mean yeah, cheerleaders getting drunk, they're gonna try some
Speaker 1: things that they should be doing. It's like that's that's
Speaker 1: stunting is as drinking, well, you don't don't stunt well
Speaker 1: well drunk, it is so wild to have that in
Speaker 1: your back pocket when you're drinking, Like, it's so scary
Speaker 1: to know that, like at any moment, a guy can
Speaker 1: flip you three times and then like catch you by
Speaker 1: grabbing your vagina, Like who wouldn't want to do that
Speaker 1: when you're drunk, you know, Oh, it's the first thing
Speaker 1: you want to do. And especially if you've been practicing
Speaker 1: it a ton and you nailed it at practice earlier
Speaker 1: that day and you finally got this move that you've
Speaker 1: been working so hard on, you just have this false confidence.
Speaker 1: And and by the way, that is false, Like people
Speaker 1: always go like, I get liquid courage. It's dumb. You're dumber.
Speaker 1: You're not actually courageous. Your stupid or courage is actually
Speaker 1: you know, be going past the fear that's real courage.
Speaker 1: When you're drunk and you think it's courage, it's because
Speaker 1: the things telling you not to do that that you
Speaker 1: should usually overcome them in order to do something are
Speaker 1: just not there because you're dumb. So that's a big
Speaker 1: dismantling of of that that people always go. But it's
Speaker 1: liquid courage, like I gotta have like if he needs
Speaker 1: to get drunk to do something, you shouldn't be doing it. Also,
Speaker 1: I think like, uh, if there were you know, when
Speaker 1: I played football in high school, they made a sign
Speaker 1: you're not gonna drink during season for you know, two
Speaker 1: months or whatever they made you like. So then the
Speaker 1: first thing you want to do as a high school
Speaker 1: kid is go drink because you're like, fuck the patriarchy
Speaker 1: or whatever. So like that coach being like I want
Speaker 1: you on your best behavior, They're like, you're a college kid,
Speaker 1: you're gonna go, Okay, I'm gonna go stunt through a
Speaker 1: glass table. You know, it's like what's his name the
Speaker 1: coach for the Chicago Bulls back in the day, what
Speaker 1: was his name, Phil Jackson? He just goes, yeah, go
Speaker 1: because I'm gonna trust you to do what's right and
Speaker 1: I'm not. I'm not your keeper. And you know that's yeah,
Speaker 1: coaches putting those limits sometimes it makes you want to
Speaker 1: do the opposite. Um for sure, okay, yes, um. And
Speaker 1: and alcohol can stunt your growth and stunt your stunts. Uh,
Speaker 1: let's get to the next one, alright, one more about
Speaker 1: being drunk. Okay from ta Okay, my name is Taylor
Speaker 1: Love the podcast. Taylor's voice currently in the bathroom at work.
Speaker 1: Second Sunless But oh my god, this is really embarrassing.
Speaker 1: But when I was a freshman one time, I was
Speaker 1: so drunk. I don't drink anymorey, I but one time
Speaker 1: I was so drunk I had a piece so bad
Speaker 1: in the bathroom. Lines are insanely long at this bar
Speaker 1: because it was like the main college bar. So I
Speaker 1: had found a cup um on the dance floor and
Speaker 1: I was on like this surface standing up. But anyways,
Speaker 1: I grabbed the cup, stuck it up my skirt, and
Speaker 1: I pad in the cup um and then my friend
Speaker 1: was like, okay, go away, and so I grabbed the
Speaker 1: cup and threw it through a cupful of my pee
Speaker 1: and onto the dance floor, like into the middle of people.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, be funny. I mean, like what was that.
Speaker 1: Now I don't drink, okay, now I don't drink. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean the the idea that you pean a cup,
Speaker 1: you get this, you get it done, you get it
Speaker 1: all in the cup, and then you go and you
Speaker 1: you throw it on the dance floor. That's a drunk
Speaker 1: move there of like just not doing the logical things,
Speaker 1: which is like you just did this amazing feat, which
Speaker 1: is peeing in a cup in a public place, you
Speaker 1: have a skirt on, Like the line is long. You
Speaker 1: just avoided this thing, Like, good job. Like maybe that's
Speaker 1: the kind of liquid courage you needed to get that
Speaker 1: liquid into that cup and then to toss it. And
Speaker 1: that's where the drong person comes in of like just
Speaker 1: throw it away. But like I mean the people that
Speaker 1: had pissed on their shoes that night that didn't realize
Speaker 1: it until. I mean, college is so disgusting. And you
Speaker 1: know what, someone definitely did the running man and slipped
Speaker 1: and not imagine lived underneath that floor, got it all
Speaker 1: over their bedding. I did shit like that all the
Speaker 1: time of just like doing this like just a knee
Speaker 1: jerk thing. That was just the grow the worst thing
Speaker 1: you could do. He's probably trash care right next to her,
Speaker 1: and she just decides to go toss it in it.
Speaker 1: My buddy would pee at the bar, like he'd go
Speaker 1: we'd be ordering drinks and he'd be like, hey, hey,
Speaker 1: hit me on the shoulder, and I looked down and
Speaker 1: he's just pissing on the bar. No, I can't believe
Speaker 1: alcohol is a thing though people. No, Yeah, it's just
Speaker 1: it's just why it's just And then I looked down
Speaker 1: his dicks out he's been I'm drunk, and I'm like
Speaker 1: like like, there's no thought like someone's gonna have to
Speaker 1: clean this. There's none of that, like there's no thoughts
Speaker 1: of others the girls, like people who clean up after
Speaker 1: college storms or like parties after college kids wearing apart.
Speaker 1: It's just those people really deserve our respect because yeah,
Speaker 1: they're just disgusting. Like the whole thing of if you
Speaker 1: miss the paper the trash can with a paper towel,
Speaker 1: always pick it up. If there's little streamers of toilet
Speaker 1: paper when you're trying to get it out of the
Speaker 1: thing and you're on the floor, someone has to pick
Speaker 1: that up. Pick it up. That's what the latest curb
Speaker 1: was all about. That that there was a so a
Speaker 1: girl like a dentist who was dating his friend, dropped
Speaker 1: something on the ground like a pirate booty, just dropped
Speaker 1: a chip, and Larry David saw her not pick it up,
Speaker 1: and so he went back to his friend. He goes,
Speaker 1: she left the chip. She left it for someone else
Speaker 1: to pick up. Not a good person to date. And
Speaker 1: like that was like the whole Yeah, that was the
Speaker 1: true if you are someone who is if you're an
Speaker 1: adult and you haven't reached a place where you know,
Speaker 1: occasionally you slip and you just get selfish and you
Speaker 1: drop something. But like I really have made it a
Speaker 1: superstition of mine that if you leave any trash on
Speaker 1: the floor for someone else to pick up at any point,
Speaker 1: you're bad things will happen to you. That trash is
Speaker 1: gonna amount to bad things coming back to you. And
Speaker 1: so now it's almost like an O. C. D obsession
Speaker 1: of mine. Like even the tiniest little piece of toilet paper,
Speaker 1: I have to pick it up because I'm like, someone
Speaker 1: will either have to sweep it into a thing and
Speaker 1: pick it up. There's going to be a human effort
Speaker 1: going into picking that up. That is not fair because
Speaker 1: I did it, um, even though that's their job or whatever. Um,
Speaker 1: let's get to the next one. Okay, let's do one
Speaker 1: about a mispronunciation from Cato a college Miss drew Indah.
Speaker 1: So I just saw good choices leaving memory from college
Speaker 1: and I wanted to share a good one. Um. I'm
Speaker 1: still in college, but this is from my freshman year
Speaker 1: and this is when I know I should have dropped
Speaker 1: out of college. I had a bio lab report to you,
Speaker 1: and I said Spanish leaves instead of spinach leaves twenty
Speaker 1: times throughout the labport and I saw the red lines
Speaker 1: like the squiggles coming up under Spanish leaves, and I
Speaker 1: was like, that's weird, like why do they want Spanish
Speaker 1: or spinach leaves to be capitalized, but made the connection
Speaker 1: that Spanish leaves was not what I was supposed to
Speaker 1: be writing. Anyways, I love the podcast, Thanks sir, all
Speaker 1: you guys do shredded lead and Spanish leaves. That's an
Speaker 1: order at subway to that, san I went extra Spanish sleaves,
Speaker 1: thought spinach was Spanish, like like you just I think
Speaker 1: you look at that word and it is kind of
Speaker 1: the same e and s in some words, right, like conscious.
Speaker 1: I love that. I love our little listeners, They're so cute.
Speaker 1: Conscious really bugs that one I always get worried about
Speaker 1: before I say it, Like I, it's conscious and conscience,
Speaker 1: conscience and also grantit and grant grant. I also get
Speaker 1: those confused granted and grant it, and then I also get, um, oh,
Speaker 1: there's another one that really gets me all the time.
Speaker 1: What you know. I was looking at my notes the
Speaker 1: other day and my friend was taking notes on my
Speaker 1: set and he typed in molestation, but it auto corrected
Speaker 1: to mole station, which I think is a hilarious new
Speaker 1: way to say that you were a victim of mole
Speaker 1: station and then maybe you can find a like And
Speaker 1: I was just talking about your tongue being a little mole.
Speaker 1: So mole station is so funny if you like, if
Speaker 1: you had a bunch of moles and you made like
Speaker 1: a little, um, little like train station for them, and
Speaker 1: that mole station. Um. Yeah, So that's just a fun
Speaker 1: way to look at that word. What was ano? Oh? Yeah,
Speaker 1: remember when I had those bad thoughts and I was
Speaker 1: thinking killing, Like I want to kill myself. That was
Speaker 1: the thought I kept having. And then I was like,
Speaker 1: change it, So what it means something else? I want
Speaker 1: to kill on stage myself. I want to kill. And
Speaker 1: then it was you can change it, change suicide, like
Speaker 1: you know, like sweet side notes, like when we drove
Speaker 1: by Carl's Bad and it was Carl's bad, like just
Speaker 1: like it's bad. That made me laugh so hard on
Speaker 1: the way to San Diego, Andrew was like, what's Carl's bad?
Speaker 1: Carl's Bad? That made me giggle a lot. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: was happy because you really, Oh my god, Sandy, San
Speaker 1: Diego always makes me think of eating a waffle on
Speaker 1: the beach. It's a Sandy ego lego, my ego yeah.
Speaker 1: I always picture someone eating a waffle on the beach
Speaker 1: whenever I hear San Diego. It's a good Yeah. These
Speaker 1: are fun and picturing, like like different moles you put
Speaker 1: on your face, like you get a Crawford or like
Speaker 1: like I just picture moles with little suitcases waiting at
Speaker 1: a train station and like hugging each other and like
Speaker 1: saying goodbye, and like one running after the train being
Speaker 1: I'll miss you, and the girl is like, yes, that
Speaker 1: look like yes, that guy makes it so much cuter
Speaker 1: than Oh my god. I met a bestie yesterday. Like
Speaker 1: I was in my lobby at my hotel with Carlyle's
Speaker 1: Carlyle's birthday yesterday, as I was with her and her
Speaker 1: boyfriend and we were having um a nightcap and um,
Speaker 1: this girl came up and forget her name, Gabrielle I
Speaker 1: think it was, and she was like, Hi, I'm just
Speaker 1: listening to podcast. I'm a big fan. And I was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god. And I was right in the middle
Speaker 1: of being like and these fucking molesters, they are sneaky cuts.
Speaker 1: Like I was talking about molestation and I go, oh
Speaker 1: my god, I was takeing about I was talking about
Speaker 1: sexual predators and child abuse, and she was like pretty
Speaker 1: on brand for you. She was like, I really appreciate
Speaker 1: those those talks to you do so Um. I was
Speaker 1: like screaming about molestation in a lobby and I got
Speaker 1: approached my fan. Our fans are so great, by the way. Um,
Speaker 1: not only am I deeply soothed by Taylor's voice? And
Speaker 1: whoever who was our last caller? It was three in
Speaker 1: a rum girl in the bathroom. The last one was
Speaker 1: Cat Cat and then who was before Taylor? Um, okay,
Speaker 1: it was Uh, Ali, Ali, Taylor and Cat. Y'all got
Speaker 1: really soothing voices. And I wouldn't mind if you made
Speaker 1: me a voice memo and send it to my d
Speaker 1: M s. That's just like an a SMR of you,
Speaker 1: just like talking about your day in a very calm,
Speaker 1: slow voice. Because I just almost went to sleep listening
Speaker 1: to your voices. I am deeply soothed by women's voices.
Speaker 1: And uh, the other day, my uh, the guy that
Speaker 1: I'm I'm seeing, Chris, he was like, I think I
Speaker 1: figured out why you love Taylor Swift so much because
Speaker 1: he heard this TikTok that she did about fall Um
Speaker 1: and like it's it's about you know, pumpkin lattes and leaves,
Speaker 1: and like it was her voice was so he was
Speaker 1: like her voice was so soothing, and I think you
Speaker 1: just love a voice like that that feels like almost
Speaker 1: maternal and like just calm and soothing. And so I
Speaker 1: think he's onto something because Taylor's voice is is just
Speaker 1: a dream. I want to go to the final thought,
Speaker 1: I it will get to one more fan threax, but
Speaker 1: I do for all our Swifties. Thank you so much
Speaker 1: for allowing me to go off the other day on Red.
Speaker 1: I'm not done going off about everything I just got into.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm taking my time all too well to
Speaker 1: a minute version, got it down, obsessed. I've I've spent
Speaker 1: a lot of hours listening to that over and over
Speaker 1: saying it with Andrew. Andrew almost knows all the new verses.
Speaker 1: It's incredible how much he's picked up of that. Appreciate that, Andrew. Um,
Speaker 1: I bet you Think about Me is my favorite, maybe
Speaker 1: one of my favorite Taylor Sois songs of all time.
Speaker 1: That is off the Red new album. It's from the Vault.
Speaker 1: It's so good and I've talked about it already, but
Speaker 1: I'm in the music video for it. That Blake Lively
Speaker 1: directed was is incredible. I watched it last night for
Speaker 1: the first time. I haven't had really time to dig
Speaker 1: into it. Here's an interesting thing. So for Swift he
Speaker 1: is out there, or for just anyone interested Taylor Swift
Speaker 1: just they She did the Rock and Roll Hall of
Speaker 1: Fame induction ceremony that filmed a little under a month
Speaker 1: ago in Cleveland, and there's footage from it taken from
Speaker 1: people in the audience, but it aired on Saturday night,
Speaker 1: and so we have the official video of it. And
Speaker 1: I was watching it and there's this moment at the
Speaker 1: beginning where and I put on my Instagram and she
Speaker 1: the camera comes up behind her, and um, she's singing, Uh,
Speaker 1: what the Carol Kings song? Does? She sing? Fuck? I
Speaker 1: can't I can't come to mind right now, but it's, Um,
Speaker 1: it's a classic. You you you would know it if you
Speaker 1: reckon if you heard it. And the camera comes up
Speaker 1: behind her and then she sees it and she turns
Speaker 1: and she just shoots at this glance that is so
Speaker 1: hot and sexy, and like, I want you to know,
Speaker 1: if you watch that, do you feel things? Because I
Speaker 1: do anyway, So I know the director of the Rock
Speaker 1: and Roll Hall of Fame show. Joel Gallen, he directed
Speaker 1: um all the roasts, and I've gone to his house
Speaker 1: to watch the roast before and um we become like
Speaker 1: texting buddies because I I was obsessed with this Prince
Speaker 1: video of Prince at the Rock and Roll Hall of
Speaker 1: Fame and he's playing while I a guitar gently weeps
Speaker 1: and he does this incredible guitar solo that's one of
Speaker 1: the best ever. And I found out Joel Gallen directed it,
Speaker 1: so I was texting him about it. So he knows
Speaker 1: I'm a big music fan and love these performances, and
Speaker 1: he invited me to his house on Saturday to watch
Speaker 1: the screening of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame ceremony.
Speaker 1: Unfortunately was in San Diego, but I was like, I
Speaker 1: can't wait to watch Taylor's performance. So I watched it
Speaker 1: last night and I saw this moment and I was
Speaker 1: really interested to know did she ask them to do that?
Speaker 1: Like when she performs, do you think does she have
Speaker 1: the camera come? And like how does that happen? Does
Speaker 1: she just sense it? Is it? Do they tell her
Speaker 1: they're going to come there? And then she knows? Um,
Speaker 1: what do you guys think when when there's a shot
Speaker 1: where the camera comes from behind and then all of
Speaker 1: a sudden it's right here, you know, like from her face,
Speaker 1: and then she looks at it the last second and
Speaker 1: nails this last line. I do think I think she
Speaker 1: is talented enough to to get that feeling and do
Speaker 1: it on her own. I feel like she is a
Speaker 1: perfectionist enough where it's actually timed. Agreed. So I asked him,
Speaker 1: and I said, was that a youth thing? And you
Speaker 1: told her that it was going to be there? Did
Speaker 1: she want it there? And he goes, she just sensed
Speaker 1: that a camera was there. It was they went through
Speaker 1: a run through, you know, with like where the cameras
Speaker 1: were going to be. He didn't even tell her about
Speaker 1: that camera. That wasn't really a planned shot. He goes,
Speaker 1: she's that good, she just sensed the camera. I mean,
Speaker 1: go watch it and see what this girl was capable.
Speaker 1: It looked like a choreographed thing. And honestly, I was
Speaker 1: bummed out that that was the answer, because it was
Speaker 1: just so good I wanted it to be. Actually, it
Speaker 1: was actually happy for the answer because it means that
Speaker 1: maybe I could do that someday, because I'm never going
Speaker 1: to be someone who's going to go through shot by
Speaker 1: shot backstage with someone that ain't ever gonna beat me.
Speaker 1: But if it's an instinctual thing that you learned from
Speaker 1: doing it enough, maybe that could beat me somewhere. Maybe
Speaker 1: I just thought that was your special. You have a
Speaker 1: you know, I know Louie did it on one of
Speaker 1: his specials where he had a camera guy actually on stage,
Speaker 1: and maybe you can, like, maybe not your whole special,
Speaker 1: but like one of your bids, you could kind of
Speaker 1: connect with the audience that way. It's a good idea.
Speaker 1: I might send them that that example of that shot
Speaker 1: because it was just so beautiful and I just want
Speaker 1: to do it. Um, okay, let's get to the last one.
Speaker 1: All right. This one's from just Stine Stein. Hey, Nikki,
Speaker 1: Andrew and Noah, it's Justine in Michigan. Um, so you
Speaker 1: needed voicemails about memories from college. Well, I immediately think
Speaker 1: of this time I was hooking up with this guy.
Speaker 1: It was my sophomore year of college, and um, we're
Speaker 1: in his basement and he started to go down on me,
Speaker 1: and all of a sudden he stops and he puts
Speaker 1: his hand like up to his mouth, back and forth
Speaker 1: and then like looks at his hand, back up to
Speaker 1: his mouth, looks at his hand, and the lights are off.
Speaker 1: I was like, what's wrong, and he's like, I'll be
Speaker 1: right back, and he goes leaves the room. I looked
Speaker 1: down and there's blood all over me. Obviously I'm mortified.
Speaker 1: I think, oh my god, I started my period. I'm
Speaker 1: literally I need to die right here and now in
Speaker 1: this moment. And uh, he comes back from the bathroom
Speaker 1: and said how embarrassed he was that he got a nosebleed,
Speaker 1: and I was thank god. Um, it was still really
Speaker 1: embarrassing and awkward, and obviously we stopped picking up and
Speaker 1: it was just weird. But that is the memory I
Speaker 1: think of in college. It's just really shitty sexual encounters.
Speaker 1: I love you guys. Oh my god, dude, you know
Speaker 1: if you start your period that you can't be at
Speaker 1: fault for that. That that that's you know, if you're
Speaker 1: on your period and you don't tell someone before, or
Speaker 1: you drunk and you forgot, I would even excuse that,
Speaker 1: but like, um, no shame in starting your period if
Speaker 1: it had been but as a freshman in college or
Speaker 1: as sophomore in college devastating if that was the case,
Speaker 1: and thank god he had a bloody nose. And I
Speaker 1: love that it went from you being embarrassed to him
Speaker 1: feeling I mean, getting a nose lead when your boy,
Speaker 1: I feel like it's just a thing that is It's
Speaker 1: almost like the period of for boys because you guys,
Speaker 1: you guys get boners, of course, but like getting nosebads,
Speaker 1: it just means you're a dork. It means you're like,
Speaker 1: it's like, what does it mean dorks? I think it's
Speaker 1: cool kind of it's like I don't know what's happening.
Speaker 1: It's lead like it's always a dork thing. But why
Speaker 1: every movie it's always I know you mean my mom
Speaker 1: told me I shouldn't where these pants are? Like it's
Speaker 1: always just like the altitude in this ship. Why now
Speaker 1: I'll still lead? Keep push bye? Oh my god. I
Speaker 1: I nosed please are hilarious and they are so vulnerable
Speaker 1: because I pick my nose and I have long fingernails.
Speaker 1: Will it will just or all like to be rubbing
Speaker 1: my nose and it'll just hit, it'll nicket. Jason Brows
Speaker 1: this weekend just told us a story backstage that right
Speaker 1: before he came to the show. He was washing his
Speaker 1: face and he had long nails on his picking finger
Speaker 1: for guitar, and it just when he was washing his face,
Speaker 1: one finger just went up his nose and scratched it
Speaker 1: and he was gushing blood down his face. And I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, that happens to me. But I'm actually
Speaker 1: picking my nose. And also when I used to have
Speaker 1: a nose ring in college, constant constantly hitting it and
Speaker 1: it bleeding all the time. Um So it's just very
Speaker 1: sensitive tissue in there and then you put then you
Speaker 1: put sensitive tissue inside it to clog it up. I
Speaker 1: wonder if that guy is somewhere tells that story and
Speaker 1: he's like, oh god, I can't believe I bleed it
Speaker 1: on her. Like I wonder if he's like, I bet
Speaker 1: he's like, I thought it was a nosebleed, but it
Speaker 1: ended up being her period. He switches in it wasn't
Speaker 1: my noseble dog, And it's like a different podcast. He's
Speaker 1: calling into Delia's podcast with that story now and they're like,
Speaker 1: fuck that bit, bloody pussy. Oh my god. Okay, well,
Speaker 1: thank you so much for this special episode. We have
Speaker 1: another episode out for you. It will be out on Thanksgivings,
Speaker 1: so Wednesday and just in time for you to listen
Speaker 1: on Thanksgiving, maybe save it for that. It's gonna be
Speaker 1: our live episode from Cancoon, which UM, you know, oh
Speaker 1: my god, so funny. It's so funny, you guys. I
Speaker 1: was there and I had fun, so I hope that
Speaker 1: you enjoy it. Thank you so much to every Bustie
Speaker 1: that came to a show this weekend in Los Angeles
Speaker 1: and San Diego. I I love meeting you. I can't
Speaker 1: say it enough. I just we're instantly friends. We we
Speaker 1: both feel it whenever we meet. And UM, I'm in
Speaker 1: Denver this weekend. I hope to see you guys. They're
Speaker 1: for shows. I'm taping my HBO special which was announced
Speaker 1: last week. Um. And there will be two shows on
Speaker 1: Saturday night in Denver, and then the following week will
Speaker 1: be in Portland and San Francisco. I'll also be coming
Speaker 1: to Calgary. Uh. Andrew won't be on that one, but
Speaker 1: I'll be in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. UM coming up on
Speaker 1: the December and also we are going to be in
Speaker 1: um uh yeah, We're also going to be in Pittsburgh
Speaker 1: to Pittsburgh and uh I believe Connecticut um in December
Speaker 1: as well, So go to Nick Laser at com slash
Speaker 1: Tour for tickets and uh, I can't wait to see
Speaker 1: you out there. Appreciate you all so much more and
Speaker 1: more of you coming to shows. It's been so cool
Speaker 1: to see since Like we started this toward July and
Speaker 1: when I said the Nick Laser podcast, how many woos
Speaker 1: there were then two? Now it's like most of the
Speaker 1: audience and that's just it's just the best feeling in
Speaker 1: the world. We love you guys, and uh, yeah, we'll
Speaker 1: get through this week of just two episodes. But don't worry.
Speaker 1: We're not like easing out. I know it might be
Speaker 1: feel like that, but that's not what's happening. It's just
Speaker 1: a busy time in the holidays. But we'll stay with you.
Speaker 1: Don't worry, and you you stay with us, so don't
Speaker 1: be care. And Jack and Jil. Someone gave me Jack
Speaker 1: and Jill by the way, I bestie, did I forget who?
Speaker 1: Thank you for that? By the way. Mm hmm