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Speaker 1: Every day Up the Breakfast Club, y'all done.

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Speaker 2: It's the World More Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club,

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Speaker 2: Charlamade and the God just Hilarious. DJ Envy Envy had

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Speaker 2: to step out, but ll Cool Bay Lauren Lorosa is

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Speaker 2: here and we got some special guests. Man, Big Stunning

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Speaker 2: for Vegas, Big Monola. What's happening?

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Speaker 1: How y'all feeling? But I love your music.

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Speaker 2: By the way, I can't pronounce the title of it either.

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Speaker 2: I call it you Ain't Black, but I did study

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Speaker 2: what it was though. Solarian is a I say, I'm

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Speaker 2: saying solon.

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Speaker 3: So it's a new way to describe Black America, Black

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Speaker 3: America exactly. So it's like an interpretation of like black culture,

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Speaker 3: black history, and it relates to like descending slaves specifically.

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Speaker 1: I love.

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Speaker 3: So that's what the.

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Speaker 4: Term I want to take. Congratulations on the wedding, the

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Speaker 4: tie in, the not the baby, the family, everything. Congratulations King,

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Speaker 4: I appreciate that. Yeah, and congratulations you too, beautiful all

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Speaker 4: pink wedding. Ye, you agreed to it? Huh yeah, you

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Speaker 4: said man, happy white, happy life.

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Speaker 3: You didn't suggest agreed to it?

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Speaker 4: Okay, So that's obviously a favorite color. It's always extent

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Speaker 4: sent and all your videos, I've seen everything.

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Speaker 3: The only color that I wear.

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Speaker 5: Okay, how did you get him.

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Speaker 3: To tell him? I was like, we can compromise if

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Speaker 3: you want.

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Speaker 6: To do what you have to do all that you

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Speaker 6: feel me. I was with it right right, you have

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Speaker 6: to do all that you.

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Speaker 5: Just love but you you love us so much like

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Speaker 5: I just give her.

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Speaker 6: But I love that.

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Speaker 1: What made you finally want to want to settle down? Sir?

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Speaker 6: We're being settled down there just like we put it

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Speaker 6: on the internet just last month, being together like four

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Speaker 6: years for sure. My first year of meeting her though,

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Speaker 6: it was like kind of just taking a break, falling

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Speaker 6: back from like the or whatever anything I was going through.

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Speaker 6: She probably not, Probably she like helped me get through

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Speaker 6: whatever everything like a homeboy would, yeah experience that from

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Speaker 6: no female.

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Speaker 2: You knew she was the one immediately, Like yeah, like

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Speaker 2: you like God told you, like, man, lock this one down.

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Speaker 5: And that black woman behind you, I know that's.

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Speaker 1: How did you know he was the one?

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Speaker 6: Yeah? He was just already.

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Speaker 3: That didn't That didn't mean that I knew he was

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Speaker 3: the one when I'm I just felt like he was

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Speaker 3: very he was just as intentional as I was, and

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Speaker 3: I really appreciated that, and he took good care of

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Speaker 3: me the same way I wanted to take care of him.

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Speaker 3: So I feel like we were on the same page

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Speaker 3: at the same time.

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Speaker 5: I love that.

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Speaker 3: What was the beauty of keeping everything off the end?

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Speaker 5: Like what did it was.

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Speaker 6: On the internet. It's just like they chose to bite

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Speaker 6: down when they did. We've been popping out though, Yeah,

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Speaker 6: we've been.

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Speaker 3: But it's because just protecting our something that's personal to us.

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Speaker 3: It's something that we care about and we love. So

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Speaker 3: it was like protecting our relationship was super important. But

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Speaker 3: we both have supporters that have been with us on

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Speaker 3: our journeys, so it was important to include them in

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Speaker 3: these pivotal moments in our life, like the wedding. I

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Speaker 3: feel like that was a no brainer. Like so many

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Speaker 3: people support us and love us and have been rooting

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Speaker 3: for our union, so it was important for us to

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Speaker 3: invite them virtually to the wedding.

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Speaker 7: You had us crying, girl when you posted the moment

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Speaker 7: with your dad. I was like, I literally was like,

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Speaker 7: oh my God. And you talked about him going through

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Speaker 7: his cancer battle and getting to see you married, and

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Speaker 7: like wow, like that was really emotional for me. So

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Speaker 7: just speak to like kind of you know you because

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Speaker 7: my mom is a stage four cancer survivor and one

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Speaker 7: of the things that she's always asked me, it's.

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Speaker 3: All, why did you ask me that question?

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Speaker 5: Okay?

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Speaker 7: Hard thing is now is like she's like, I've been

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Speaker 7: sick before. I want to see you be able to

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Speaker 7: do things. I don't know if I'll be able to

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Speaker 7: be here tomorrow. So when you posted that, I was like, dang,

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Speaker 7: like time is of the essence, Like it made me

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Speaker 7: start thinking like, wow, I want my mom to be

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Speaker 7: able to see me get married and have kids. And

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Speaker 7: you know, like it's I don't think people understand the

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Speaker 7: cancer battle, how scared it gets.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true.

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Speaker 2: Your mom will see you be successful before she sees

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Speaker 2: you get.

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Speaker 7: When I when I when I saw your posts and

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Speaker 7: I read the caption, it just really made me think

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Speaker 7: because you know, when you know, parents are always trying.

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Speaker 3: To be like superheroes always.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, so even through my mom's cancer battle, she was like,

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Speaker 7: it's going to be fine. Just make sure you get

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Speaker 7: some grand babies here because I want to see my grandbabies.

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Speaker 7: When I read that, I'm like, oh, like this is serious,

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Speaker 7: like I gotta figure this out, so serious. It was

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Speaker 7: such an important moment for me to share with my dad,

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Speaker 7: and so I'm so glad you brought that up at

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Speaker 7: the top of the interview because I can't wait for

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Speaker 7: him to hear this. But even during his cancer battle,

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Speaker 7: he was very secretive.

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Speaker 3: He was private. He didn't tell anybody for six months. Obviously,

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Speaker 3: I feel like me being kind of tapped in spiritually,

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Speaker 3: I felt like something was going on with him, but

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Speaker 3: he never had explicitly told me that he was battling cancer.

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Speaker 3: I just saw him deteriorating in a sense, like he

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Speaker 3: was getting smaller and it's his hair was going and

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Speaker 3: I was just like, Dad, what's going on with you? Like,

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Speaker 3: and he was distancing himself from me, wouldn't even him

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Speaker 3: no more. My son when't and my son loves my dad,

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Speaker 3: but he was he didn't. Every time my dad picked

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Speaker 3: him up, he would be crying, and I was just like, Dad,

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Speaker 3: something's going on. And I just kind of pressured him

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Speaker 3: a little bit and I was like, tell me what's

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Speaker 3: wrong or else. And he showed me his scans and

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Speaker 3: I could see he had it real zoomed in so

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Speaker 3: that I couldn't see that it said hoskins and foma.

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Speaker 3: But when I took his phone and I literally took

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Speaker 3: off running down the street, and I assumed and I

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Speaker 3: started to say hoskins and foam, and I'll just bust

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Speaker 3: out crying because it was such Anymore, I've never seen

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Speaker 3: my dad cough, sneeze me, either, have a cold, none

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Speaker 3: of the things. So to know that he was that

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Speaker 3: he was battling cancer without my full support really touched me.

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Speaker 3: And it really really really hurt me. But thankfully he's

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Speaker 3: beat cancer.

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Speaker 1: God.

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Speaker 3: Afterwards, he I guess the chemotherapy had done a number

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Speaker 3: on his heart, so he was he had heart failure

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Speaker 3: and he had to have a triple bypass surgery. That

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Speaker 3: he also wasn't clear about either. One thing about my dad,

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Speaker 3: he is truly superman like. He doesn't want to He

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Speaker 3: doesn't want people worried about him, even if it's something

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Speaker 3: that I should be concerned about. He doesn't want us

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Speaker 3: to be worried about him. So when I found out

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Speaker 3: what he was battling, I was so emotional and I

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Speaker 3: was so all over the place. So and I kind

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Speaker 3: of put, if I'm being candidate, put it made me

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Speaker 3: want to expedite this the process for everything, because I realized, like,

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Speaker 3: I don't know what I was waiting on. I think

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Speaker 3: it was I was feeling the pressures from society, and

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Speaker 3: I'm like, maybe I'm too young to be doing this,

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Speaker 3: and you know, you think about all these things in

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Speaker 3: your mind, and then that kind of really snapped me

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Speaker 3: back to reality and it made me live for myself

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Speaker 3: and for my family, for my village, for my community.

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Speaker 3: So it kind of made me want to expedite the

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Speaker 3: wedding process. And we did it.

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Speaker 1: And to my dad, walking on the as be there, Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, walk me down the aisle was a dream.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, why do you Why do y'all think the adults, Oh,

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Speaker 2: the adults feel like keeping that from the kids is

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Speaker 2: the right thing to do.

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Speaker 1: Like why fight a battle like that alone?

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Speaker 5: What's scary?

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Speaker 3: It's like a nightmare. Yeah. I don't think he knew.

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Speaker 3: I think he wanted to keep hope. But he was

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Speaker 3: diagnosed as stay straight, stay straight for it, so he

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Speaker 3: I think he he was optimistic, but I truly think

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Speaker 3: he didn't know. And I think he wanted me to,

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Speaker 3: you know, focus on my tour and my career. He

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Speaker 3: didn't want me to leave and abandon what I was

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Speaker 3: doing because he knew I would have done that. Nothing

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Speaker 3: more important than me than my family.

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Speaker 7: You have a song on your mixtape, Diary of an

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Speaker 7: og and when even that song too, I was thinking

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Speaker 7: about this. You're the oldest, the oldest girl, yes, and

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Speaker 7: you talk about the responsibility of being the oldest girl

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Speaker 7: in your family and not being able to think about yourself,

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Speaker 7: and that made me think about your relationship with your

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Speaker 7: dad and everything you went through as well while having

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Speaker 7: a career. Because another thing too, I think why like

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Speaker 7: the older people hide it is because they know drop

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Speaker 7: of a dime, you're not on tour no more, You're

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Speaker 7: not dropping songs, not doing nothing.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm not complying with anything career related. I would

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Speaker 3: have dropped everything to be at his side every single day,

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Speaker 3: every chemotherapy appointment. I would have been cooking his meals

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Speaker 3: every day. So to a degree, I'm grateful that he

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Speaker 3: was selfless in those moments and allowed me to continue

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Speaker 3: following what it is that I'm passionate about because he

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Speaker 3: knows I wouldn't have I wouldn't have pursued it. I

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Speaker 3: wouldn't even be here. I would have taken a complete

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Speaker 3: I wouldn't have recorded any music videos, photo shoot, nothing

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Speaker 3: would have mattered to me other than making sure that

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Speaker 3: he was okay. So I think now that time has passed,

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Speaker 3: I feel like maybe he did make the right decision

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Speaker 3: and this shit. I was upset because I was like, Dad,

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Speaker 3: I want to be there for you. This is a

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Speaker 3: really scary time in your life. And he didn't tell anybody,

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Speaker 3: not my siblings, not his mom. He didn't tell anybody

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Speaker 3: other than his wife, so it was just them too,

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Speaker 3: and she had just lost her mom, so it was

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Speaker 3: really difficult for them to manage at the time. So

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Speaker 3: I'm so and I'm glad Charlamagne that you talk about

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Speaker 3: therapy as much as you do, because he's in therapy

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Speaker 3: now and we're getting back to a place of trusting

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Speaker 3: each other and loving each other and supporting each other.

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Speaker 3: And I feel like the wedding was just a way

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Speaker 3: to extend olive branches to everybody in our village, in

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Speaker 3: our community. So I'm glad that he was there.

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Speaker 2: It's incredible how God works, because you know that once situation,

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Speaker 2: which could be deemed as negative, let to all of

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Speaker 2: this positive. You know, it said it means you put

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Speaker 2: your gas press the gas on your career and made

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Speaker 2: y'all get married.

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Speaker 1: And I'm gonna tell you something.

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Speaker 2: When I look at y'all, man, forget to look when

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Speaker 2: I'm sitting next to y'all, I can feel it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, family like y'all.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, y'all are a unit. Like it's something like y'all

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Speaker 2: are supposed to be together. Like even looking at Stunt,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, I think a Proverbs eighteen twenty two man,

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Speaker 2: when a man find a good wife, man, you know

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Speaker 2: he gained a different favor from the lord. Like I

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Speaker 2: even see something different in your spirit.

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Speaker 6: Oh yeah, I do too. Already know though, because I'm like,

224
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Speaker 6: I'm like deeply involved to like how she is spiritually,

225
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Speaker 6: So I already know.

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Speaker 5: And when we saw you get emotional, right, what were

227
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Speaker 5: your thoughts?

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Speaker 6: I was like, yeah, I was like looking at gangsters

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Speaker 6: in the crowd crying you feel me. I was looking

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Speaker 6: at my mama, my dad that I just met, feel me,

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Speaker 6: her grandma because even her family and me alone, like

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Speaker 6: after the wedding, it's like both of our family's family now,

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Speaker 6: but like before it was, I was already like this

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Speaker 6: with her dad, Grandma, Grandpa, great grandpa all of so

235
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Speaker 6: I was just like getting ready for her to walk out.

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Speaker 6: You feel me, And that's what it was like, because

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Speaker 6: I was crying before she walked out, but when she did,

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Speaker 6: I was just like, damn, it's like I've been through

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Speaker 6: a lot of stuff. You feel me, And I don't

240
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Speaker 6: like get on the internet to public make it public.

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Speaker 6: I don't. I don't. I don't really do nothing but

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Speaker 6: deal with it. You feel me on my own too,

243
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Speaker 6: So it was just like all that was just like, man,

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Speaker 6: all that ship out the window, now, like this is

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Speaker 6: what I'm walking into. When she was walking down, it

246
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Speaker 6: was just like I'll let everything go that she wants

247
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Speaker 6: me to let go, stuff that I'll be mad about

248
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Speaker 6: one month and be fine with it the next. Like

249
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Speaker 6: I just let it go because it's all that mattered.

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Speaker 1: You said your father had just met Yeah, my.

251
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Speaker 6: Dad on Father's Day was no cap, no cap. I

252
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Speaker 6: met him on Father's Day. My wife got me to

253
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Speaker 6: do a DNA ancestory kid. We was doing that. As

254
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Speaker 6: we're getting ready for the wedding, I'm like, boom, I

255
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Speaker 6: probably ain't talked to my grandma, my mom mom in

256
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Speaker 6: like ten years. Ain't hugged or nothing. Uh, family too,

257
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Speaker 6: like uncles and aunts, but it always being me and

258
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Speaker 6: my mom. Like my siblings had their dad, so they'll

259
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Speaker 6: go live with them. If we anything, gotta go to

260
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Speaker 6: a shelter whatever, if it me is me and my mama.

261
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Speaker 6: So I'm like telling my wife, like, damn, I want

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Speaker 6: my family to be at the wedding. I want my

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Speaker 6: mama to be there with her mama, my aunt, my uncle.

264
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Speaker 6: Like that's how I grew up around family. Whatever I'm

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Speaker 6: doing it, we're doing the ancestry Kid. Probably a month

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Speaker 6: before we go sit down with my family, I'm like,

267
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Speaker 6: I'm about to sit my mom and my grandparents down,

268
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Speaker 6: my uncles and aunts. All that long story short, that

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Speaker 6: was like not meant to happen. And that same day

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Speaker 6: I was just like, damn, it ain't gonna never be

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Speaker 6: like what it's supposed to be with my family again.

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Speaker 6: It was like five o'clock in the morning. We was

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Speaker 6: in North Carolina because that's what we was meeting up

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Speaker 6: with everybody. My wife woke me up like, man, babe,

275
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Speaker 6: I'm finding your cousins right now. Like on my dad's side.

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Speaker 6: The ancestry Kid had hit like that that day the

277
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Speaker 6: results came back to day that I tried to sit

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Speaker 6: my mama down with her mom, brother and sister and

279
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Speaker 6: it went left. Then we found a few cousins. They

280
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Speaker 6: was telling me, you look like this guy. You look

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Speaker 6: like this guy. We went on a month trying to

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Speaker 6: find my dad, and then on follow the day we

283
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Speaker 6: got a.

284
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Speaker 3: Hired the genealogist to interpret the to interpret the ancestry

285
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Speaker 3: in the results, and it took her about six weeks

286
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Speaker 3: to give us the full report. And then when she

287
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Speaker 3: sent the full report back, she said that, you know,

288
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Speaker 3: his dad could be one of these three people and

289
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Speaker 3: there were three brothers, and so we kind of went

290
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Speaker 3: down the line and I called she had numbers listed

291
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Speaker 3: in emails. I reached out to everybody. Person that I

292
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Speaker 3: was able to contact was his grandmother. And initially they

293
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Speaker 3: thought it was like a scam. They were like, you know,

294
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Speaker 3: why are you calling us? And I was like, listen,

295
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Speaker 3: we don't want any we don't want child support, we

296
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Speaker 3: want anything. We are well off people. We just want

297
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Speaker 3: to mend the relationship between him and who we believe

298
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Speaker 3: is his dad. And so we kind of went through

299
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Speaker 3: the three different options. His two uncles and his dad,

300
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Speaker 3: and we called it. We called it, we called the

301
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Speaker 3: first option, and she the genealogist, had him listed as

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Speaker 3: the first option because he was the closest in age

303
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Speaker 3: to his mom. So we initially thought that it was

304
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Speaker 3: his uncle, so we FaceTime them. They didn't all the

305
00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:41,000
Speaker 3: way look alike, but they had some sort of similarity.

306
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Speaker 3: So we were like, hey, you know, we're just trying

307
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Speaker 3: to figure this out. And he was like, Hey, I

308
00:14:44,680 --> 00:14:46,240
Speaker 3: don't think it's me, but it might be my brother

309
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Speaker 3: because I think he looks more like my brother. And

310
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Speaker 3: then we FaceTime, we know, FaceTime with him later on

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Speaker 3: Father's Day, and when at his grandmother's house and him

312
00:14:57,040 --> 00:14:59,160
Speaker 3: and his dad, they looked just alike and the synergy

313
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Speaker 3: was their immediate and we flew out the next day.

314
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Speaker 3: He's from these dads from Detroit. We flew out the

315
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Speaker 3: next day. We met his dad, We met the rest

316
00:15:07,080 --> 00:15:09,520
Speaker 3: of his family, and his dad was his siblings. He

317
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Speaker 3: found out he had two a brother and a sister

318
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Speaker 3: that he didn't know about. So this has been almost

319
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Speaker 3: thirty years that he didn't know his dad. So to

320
00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:21,400
Speaker 3: be able for them to be able to reconnect right

321
00:15:21,440 --> 00:15:23,680
Speaker 3: before the wedding was so it was a lot of

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Speaker 3: emotions going on. When people see the clip, they think

323
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Speaker 3: it's like, oh, he just up there tore up about

324
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Speaker 3: his wife, And I think that to a degree, he

325
00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:33,720
Speaker 3: was emotional, but there were so many different things going on.

326
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Speaker 3: There were so many different reasons for us to be

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Speaker 3: happy crying that day.

328
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Speaker 1: So how whole that made you feel?

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Speaker 6: Son, I don't know yet. I don't know yet. I

330
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Speaker 6: don't know yet.

331
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Speaker 5: That's honest. That's honest.

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Speaker 4: The conversations with you and your dad, are they like

333
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Speaker 4: what you dreamed of or did you want like you know,

334
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Speaker 4: were you nervousy with this whole process?

335
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Speaker 6: Nah? I don't think so.

336
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:04,080
Speaker 3: I feel like I think there were a little bit

337
00:16:04,120 --> 00:16:04,880
Speaker 3: of nerves.

338
00:16:05,160 --> 00:16:08,040
Speaker 6: Yeah, But I'm just like a difficult person to deal with.

339
00:16:08,440 --> 00:16:10,880
Speaker 6: So I don't know. I mean, like, you know, like

340
00:16:12,600 --> 00:16:15,160
Speaker 6: I mean, like as far as nothing like against my

341
00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:18,360
Speaker 6: dad though, But I just don't I don't know. I

342
00:16:18,400 --> 00:16:20,560
Speaker 6: don't know how it made me feel. Sometimes he called

343
00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:23,120
Speaker 6: he gonna see this and be like sometimes the call

344
00:16:23,840 --> 00:16:26,640
Speaker 6: and I might not even know like what we should

345
00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:30,600
Speaker 6: talk about, so I might not ask and I call

346
00:16:30,680 --> 00:16:34,480
Speaker 6: her dad though immediately yeah, like whatever, as soon as

347
00:16:34,520 --> 00:16:36,080
Speaker 6: we leave out of here, I'm gonna call him probably

348
00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:38,680
Speaker 6: like or he gonna call me. We talked. It's like

349
00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:42,760
Speaker 6: we got the relationship that I was like looking for

350
00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:44,800
Speaker 6: for a long time because I was in there with

351
00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:46,440
Speaker 6: him when she when she was at work. I was

352
00:16:46,480 --> 00:16:49,560
Speaker 6: going to chemotherapy or I'll be whatever I need. He

353
00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:52,520
Speaker 6: gonna pick up, he gonna drop whatever I asked him

354
00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:54,200
Speaker 6: to drop for me right then and there. So he

355
00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:58,720
Speaker 6: kind of like build the void before my dad could

356
00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:01,120
Speaker 6: come in and like feel it. But it was just

357
00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:03,120
Speaker 6: good also to meet my dad and I see like

358
00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:05,959
Speaker 6: we look alike. He looked, my son look like him.

359
00:17:06,080 --> 00:17:09,040
Speaker 6: You feel me, We walk alike. I met my grandma,

360
00:17:09,119 --> 00:17:10,840
Speaker 6: I got a sister, my age, You feel me.

361
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,960
Speaker 2: But you learn a lot about yourself though, because you

362
00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:16,240
Speaker 2: could be dealing with physical health issues, mental health issues,

363
00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:19,119
Speaker 2: and not even nowhere but your dad might have been

364
00:17:19,119 --> 00:17:20,600
Speaker 2: dealing with it. You learned a lot about yourself when

365
00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:21,400
Speaker 2: you connect those dots.

366
00:17:21,560 --> 00:17:23,919
Speaker 3: You think it was a nerve wreaking experience too, like

367
00:17:24,640 --> 00:17:28,080
Speaker 3: just for me trying to facilitate, I was really nervous

368
00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:32,320
Speaker 3: because I didn't know how his dad would receive him

369
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:35,639
Speaker 3: and receive the situation as a whole. I was just

370
00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:41,200
Speaker 3: hoping that he wanted to connect as badly as Sonna

371
00:17:41,240 --> 00:17:46,040
Speaker 3: wanted to connect. That was my main goal, I guess

372
00:17:46,040 --> 00:17:47,680
Speaker 3: in my mind, because you never really know how people

373
00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:49,320
Speaker 3: will receive things. Some people will be like, oh no,

374
00:17:49,359 --> 00:17:52,520
Speaker 3: I'm not dealing with this, it's too much. But I

375
00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:55,600
Speaker 3: think it's been difficult for both of them to process it,

376
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:58,160
Speaker 3: and his dad as well, like how do you really

377
00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:00,879
Speaker 3: process having a son and not knowing that you had

378
00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:04,400
Speaker 3: a son for almost thirty years and then he's an artist.

379
00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:06,960
Speaker 3: But he was telling us too. He was like, I've

380
00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:09,040
Speaker 3: seen him before, I know his music. He was able

381
00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:10,440
Speaker 3: to tell us some of the songs that he did

382
00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:14,080
Speaker 3: that he really liked. So it was just like I

383
00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:17,760
Speaker 3: could tell he was stunned. Yeah, he had no idea though,

384
00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:21,080
Speaker 3: because if you look him up he's from you will

385
00:18:21,080 --> 00:18:23,200
Speaker 3: see that he's from North Carolina. His dad had never

386
00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:25,800
Speaker 3: been to North Carolina. He had met his mom in

387
00:18:25,880 --> 00:18:31,199
Speaker 3: Atlanta and they were young. Things happened, they moved apart,

388
00:18:31,720 --> 00:18:34,000
Speaker 3: she was pregnant, she moved back home to North Carolina

389
00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:36,800
Speaker 3: to kind of go throughout her pregnancy. So it was

390
00:18:36,840 --> 00:18:42,280
Speaker 3: like there was never really he never really knew anything

391
00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:44,760
Speaker 3: about him so I imagine that that's a lot for

392
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:46,960
Speaker 3: him to process as well, and his mom as well too,

393
00:18:47,080 --> 00:18:49,440
Speaker 3: because I know that she lives with some of those

394
00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:52,320
Speaker 3: feelings and like, you know, just being young and being

395
00:18:52,359 --> 00:18:54,760
Speaker 3: a human being and making mistakes, but not really a

396
00:18:54,760 --> 00:18:57,440
Speaker 3: mistake because I needed him, so it's not I don't

397
00:18:57,520 --> 00:19:00,200
Speaker 3: perceive it as a mistake. So it was like, it's

398
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:03,639
Speaker 3: a lot for everybody to process in this experience. So

399
00:19:03,680 --> 00:19:07,160
Speaker 3: I'm just trying to be the glue in this situation

400
00:19:07,240 --> 00:19:10,320
Speaker 3: and keep us all close, keep us connected, and keep

401
00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:12,360
Speaker 3: us in this healing process.

402
00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:19,359
Speaker 2: Generational crust breaking moment, I'm just.

403
00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:24,639
Speaker 3: General some generational curse breakers. I love that, And that's where.

404
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:27,879
Speaker 6: We live, that's what that's what we stand on.

405
00:19:28,480 --> 00:19:30,080
Speaker 3: That's what we swear by. Where does that come from?

406
00:19:30,119 --> 00:19:35,960
Speaker 7: Because in your music, yes, are you raised that way

407
00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:37,359
Speaker 7: that something like where does it come from?

408
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:40,200
Speaker 3: For sure? I have a family full of matriarchs, full

409
00:19:40,240 --> 00:19:44,000
Speaker 3: of very strong matriarchs, my mother, both of my grandmothers,

410
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,800
Speaker 3: my stepmother. I have a family full of women who

411
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:49,560
Speaker 3: are the glue for their families. So I have a

412
00:19:49,560 --> 00:19:53,679
Speaker 3: really good example of like how to keep a family together.

413
00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:58,639
Speaker 3: And I think they've done a lot for our family,

414
00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:01,760
Speaker 3: but it's with me. I feel like my purpose is

415
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:08,200
Speaker 3: to usher in change and bring about a certain type

416
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:12,159
Speaker 3: of energy that it's real and that's raw, and that's unapologetic.

417
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:16,320
Speaker 3: And if that means we often to put our mess

418
00:20:16,359 --> 00:20:19,240
Speaker 3: on the table, that's what we have to do so

419
00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:22,520
Speaker 3: that we can really get somewhere. Because I love my

420
00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:25,239
Speaker 3: son with everything in me, and I don't want him

421
00:20:25,280 --> 00:20:27,840
Speaker 3: to experience half of the things that I experience growing up.

422
00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:32,720
Speaker 3: I want him to have a pure, a pure life,

423
00:20:33,359 --> 00:20:35,800
Speaker 3: and so I want to if that means uncovering everybody's

424
00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:40,400
Speaker 3: secrets and just my son deserves to know his grandparents,

425
00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:44,080
Speaker 3: his grandfather, He deserves to have a relationship with everybody

426
00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:47,960
Speaker 3: that is healthy. So whatever I have to do to

427
00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:50,639
Speaker 3: bring in these healthy relationships, I'm willing to do.

428
00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:52,280
Speaker 1: All I want to do. All I want to do

429
00:20:52,359 --> 00:20:53,600
Speaker 1: is raise trauma free kids.

430
00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:54,720
Speaker 3: That's all I want to do.

431
00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:57,080
Speaker 2: Please God, is give me the power and the ability

432
00:20:57,119 --> 00:20:59,520
Speaker 2: to raise or trauma free young lady.

433
00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:00,000
Speaker 3: Please.

434
00:21:00,119 --> 00:21:00,520
Speaker 1: That's it.

435
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:03,560
Speaker 3: That's odd because I can only imagine what that looks like.

436
00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:06,080
Speaker 3: I can't imagine what that will look like on my

437
00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:09,840
Speaker 3: son as an adult. I can't wait to see you know,

438
00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:12,840
Speaker 3: the fruits of my labor. I can't wait to see

439
00:21:13,280 --> 00:21:16,840
Speaker 3: how he grows up to be. And like, I don't

440
00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:18,680
Speaker 3: really know very many people in my life, just as

441
00:21:18,720 --> 00:21:21,720
Speaker 3: a young Black American, Southern Black American girl, I don't

442
00:21:21,720 --> 00:21:24,720
Speaker 3: know many people in my life who haven't experienced some

443
00:21:24,760 --> 00:21:27,159
Speaker 3: sort of trauma. So I'm excited to see what that

444
00:21:27,200 --> 00:21:29,000
Speaker 3: looks like on him. And I just want him to

445
00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:31,879
Speaker 3: be everything that he wants to be, an astronaut or

446
00:21:32,400 --> 00:21:34,760
Speaker 3: school bus drop, whatever you want to be. I just

447
00:21:34,800 --> 00:21:37,240
Speaker 3: want to be here to facilitate that in the healthiest way.

448
00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:37,600
Speaker 6: Yeah.

449
00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:39,560
Speaker 5: Now, are you in therapy? It stunning?

450
00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:41,680
Speaker 2: No, but.

451
00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:45,439
Speaker 6: Mm hmm. I'll be talking to her so I'll be like,

452
00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:48,280
Speaker 6: I don't really need that type of stuff because like

453
00:21:48,359 --> 00:21:50,159
Speaker 6: she can get me to a point where I'm not

454
00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:54,359
Speaker 6: mentally like out of it. Yeah, so I'll be like

455
00:21:54,800 --> 00:21:56,879
Speaker 6: kind of like, maybe I don't need it like that.

456
00:21:57,560 --> 00:21:59,679
Speaker 3: We've tried. We tried therapy, though we have. We did

457
00:21:59,720 --> 00:22:03,320
Speaker 3: pre counseling before we got married, and then you did

458
00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:08,120
Speaker 3: your own individual therapy before we did premieral counseling. You did. Yeah,

459
00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:12,439
Speaker 3: a start, It's a start. It takes a minute to

460
00:22:12,520 --> 00:22:19,159
Speaker 3: get people. I grew up hospitalized in different mental health institutions,

461
00:22:19,200 --> 00:22:21,480
Speaker 3: and I grew up in therapy. I really struggled with

462
00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:23,560
Speaker 3: my mental health growing up, so that was kind of

463
00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:27,520
Speaker 3: It's not that it was normalized. But my grandmother, she

464
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:30,960
Speaker 3: works at a mental health hospital, so she was always diagnosing,

465
00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:33,760
Speaker 3: and you know, I grew up taking medication, like I

466
00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:38,359
Speaker 3: really grew up trying to fix whatever was wrong with me.

467
00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:41,280
Speaker 3: So that's something that was normal for me. But when

468
00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:43,400
Speaker 3: we got in our relationship, it wasn't really a thing

469
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:45,760
Speaker 3: that was talked about with him. So I try to

470
00:22:45,840 --> 00:22:50,120
Speaker 3: encourage him to do therapy, and I think he's coming

471
00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:52,639
Speaker 3: around to it, for sure. It's not that he's anti therapy.

472
00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:54,560
Speaker 3: I think he's coming around to it for sure. But

473
00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:57,680
Speaker 3: I think his main priority is just surviving.

474
00:22:58,520 --> 00:23:02,240
Speaker 1: So and you got to find the right therapist.

475
00:23:02,920 --> 00:23:03,359
Speaker 6: I feel like that.

476
00:23:04,960 --> 00:23:07,040
Speaker 3: Too. But I think we've we've really reached a point

477
00:23:07,080 --> 00:23:12,080
Speaker 3: of like bliss and happiness currently, like we're really in

478
00:23:12,119 --> 00:23:15,680
Speaker 3: a really happy space. But I know therapy is preventative,

479
00:23:16,240 --> 00:23:20,160
Speaker 3: so it's not necessarily reactive like some I don't think

480
00:23:20,160 --> 00:23:21,919
Speaker 3: feel like something has to happen and then you go

481
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:24,000
Speaker 3: to therapy. I think you should be in therapy period,

482
00:23:24,119 --> 00:23:27,280
Speaker 3: just to process what it is that you've experienced in

483
00:23:27,320 --> 00:23:30,720
Speaker 3: your life. But we're slowly but surely we're coming around

484
00:23:30,760 --> 00:23:32,760
Speaker 3: to it. But I'm really proud of him for the man,

485
00:23:32,760 --> 00:23:37,400
Speaker 3: and he's become his sobriety journey. Like there's so many

486
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:38,639
Speaker 3: things that people don't.

487
00:23:38,920 --> 00:23:40,400
Speaker 1: Come ahead and bring me the big bottle and head

488
00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:40,800
Speaker 1: to see them.

489
00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:47,840
Speaker 3: No, no, no, not liquor, sir.

490
00:23:48,119 --> 00:23:49,800
Speaker 6: I used to do that every day before I ate,

491
00:23:50,240 --> 00:23:53,520
Speaker 6: like real talk and not saying I don't know, like

492
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:57,200
Speaker 6: making it cool. Yeah, because even when I was doing that,

493
00:23:57,200 --> 00:23:58,640
Speaker 6: I don't think I was making it cool. I think

494
00:23:58,680 --> 00:24:02,280
Speaker 6: I was like doing therapy. Yeah, And when I met her,

495
00:24:02,280 --> 00:24:03,960
Speaker 6: I kind of found out that, like, damn, that's all

496
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:06,800
Speaker 6: that was because of Medicaid. I started going to the gym,

497
00:24:07,359 --> 00:24:10,560
Speaker 6: I want to pick up a pert or bottle or

498
00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:13,639
Speaker 6: nothing like. Even now I don't like to drink unless

499
00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:14,160
Speaker 6: I'm with her.

500
00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:22,040
Speaker 7: That sounds crazy, that's so bad, No, but he's yeah, yeah.

501
00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:22,760
Speaker 6: Yeah, I do.

502
00:24:23,520 --> 00:24:26,320
Speaker 2: What did stunt to do that made you feel so

503
00:24:26,480 --> 00:24:27,560
Speaker 2: safe and protected?

504
00:24:28,359 --> 00:24:32,199
Speaker 3: I think he showed this level of care that I

505
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:38,200
Speaker 3: hadn't experienced yet. Yeah, that Southern hospitality that I hadn't

506
00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:40,359
Speaker 3: experienced yet. Like I said, I grew, I grew. I

507
00:24:40,400 --> 00:24:44,320
Speaker 3: went through a lot growing up. I was abused. Please

508
00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:46,120
Speaker 3: put a trigger winning on this too, because I don't

509
00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:49,000
Speaker 3: I'm not here to trauma dump. But I'm just being

510
00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:52,080
Speaker 3: candid because I prayed for this opportunity to get on

511
00:24:52,119 --> 00:24:53,960
Speaker 3: Breakfast Club. I actually wrote it in my journal five

512
00:24:54,040 --> 00:24:56,400
Speaker 3: years ago. I wrote this in my journal, I will

513
00:24:56,400 --> 00:24:58,440
Speaker 3: be on Breakfast Club before I was even putting music out.

514
00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:02,000
Speaker 3: So I'm just making sure that I do my due

515
00:25:02,040 --> 00:25:05,280
Speaker 3: diligence to my younger self because I told myself I

516
00:25:05,320 --> 00:25:06,560
Speaker 3: was going to be here, and I'm here, and I

517
00:25:06,560 --> 00:25:09,680
Speaker 3: want us to see us this opportunity to be candid

518
00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:13,000
Speaker 3: and clear and concise. I went through a lot growing up,

519
00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:17,000
Speaker 3: so and I feel like there was a lot of neglect.

520
00:25:17,200 --> 00:25:21,440
Speaker 3: And that's not to shame anyone or shame my parents,

521
00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:24,520
Speaker 3: but they were young and they were learning, and my

522
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:28,480
Speaker 3: experience is my experience, and what happened to me happened

523
00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:31,280
Speaker 3: to me, and I can't erase that. So I want

524
00:25:31,280 --> 00:25:33,160
Speaker 3: to be clear about that too, because sometimes I feel

525
00:25:33,160 --> 00:25:36,680
Speaker 3: like when you talk about certain things, especially in the

526
00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:39,359
Speaker 3: black community, it's like what happens in the house stays

527
00:25:39,359 --> 00:25:42,080
Speaker 3: in the house, and I want to free myself from

528
00:25:42,080 --> 00:25:45,600
Speaker 3: those experiences as I grow into this woman that I'm becoming.

529
00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:49,480
Speaker 3: I experienced some things, some abuse, things happened to me

530
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:51,439
Speaker 3: that should have never happened to me. So when I

531
00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:56,000
Speaker 3: met him and I didn't feel taken advantage of. I

532
00:25:56,080 --> 00:26:02,120
Speaker 3: felt celebrated, I felt appreciated, and I felt valued. Yeah,

533
00:26:02,880 --> 00:26:06,719
Speaker 3: so that made me feel like this is where I belong,

534
00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:10,280
Speaker 3: this is where I should be in his family, they

535
00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:14,680
Speaker 3: were receptive. We went through our things, but we they

536
00:26:14,800 --> 00:26:16,879
Speaker 3: reminded me a lot of my family. So we have

537
00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:19,040
Speaker 3: so many similarities that we shared and I was just like,

538
00:26:19,080 --> 00:26:21,199
Speaker 3: this feels like home for me.

539
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:26,320
Speaker 2: Since we having this conversation, Is it true that you

540
00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:28,560
Speaker 2: attempted suicide in the fourth grade?

541
00:26:30,760 --> 00:26:30,879
Speaker 6: Hm?

542
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:39,000
Speaker 5: Hm, there's a baby, you're a baby.

543
00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:45,960
Speaker 6: Yeah, there's more. She donet been through. I go down

544
00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:46,800
Speaker 6: the list myself.

545
00:26:46,840 --> 00:26:47,360
Speaker 5: She doesn't.

546
00:26:49,560 --> 00:26:52,919
Speaker 6: Through a lot. That was another thing that when I

547
00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:56,480
Speaker 6: got around, she wasn't like trauma dumping on me, but

548
00:26:56,560 --> 00:26:59,120
Speaker 6: it was like, she'll be telling me stuff and I'd

549
00:26:59,160 --> 00:27:02,200
Speaker 6: be like, man, I was just with you as four

550
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:06,000
Speaker 6: five niggas over there. Yeah, Like in North Carolina. We

551
00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:09,280
Speaker 6: could see a bum getting be a woman and we're

552
00:27:09,280 --> 00:27:11,520
Speaker 6: gonna go do something to the man or taken advantage

553
00:27:11,560 --> 00:27:15,560
Speaker 6: of I'm not. I'm not. I'm saying like that's what

554
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:19,439
Speaker 6: made me be like man, not not even that. I

555
00:27:19,480 --> 00:27:21,360
Speaker 6: just wanted to protect myself. I just wanted to show,

556
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:23,080
Speaker 6: like I saw the God, that shit won't happen again,

557
00:27:23,240 --> 00:27:25,240
Speaker 6: Like you don't have to do that, you won't have

558
00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:27,040
Speaker 6: to do this, wi't nobody come looking for you, want

559
00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:29,440
Speaker 6: nobody put in none of that, it will ever happen again.

560
00:27:29,880 --> 00:27:33,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, he was very protective, but yeah that I was.

561
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:37,320
Speaker 3: I don't know, well, I guess I was. I was

562
00:27:37,359 --> 00:27:42,359
Speaker 3: experiencing a lot as a kid that I really couldn't process,

563
00:27:42,880 --> 00:27:45,199
Speaker 3: and I knew it didn't feel good. I didn't know

564
00:27:45,240 --> 00:27:47,239
Speaker 3: exactly what was happening, but I knew it was like

565
00:27:47,760 --> 00:27:53,080
Speaker 3: this feels wrong to me. And I really struggled with

566
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:56,520
Speaker 3: my self worth, my self confidence, and I was just

567
00:27:56,560 --> 00:27:58,280
Speaker 3: like why am I here? And I was feeling like

568
00:27:58,320 --> 00:28:03,440
Speaker 3: that very young, very young fourth grade I I, that's true,

569
00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:07,480
Speaker 3: that's my that was my earliest Well, third grade is

570
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:09,520
Speaker 3: when those feelings started, and then fourth grade is when

571
00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:13,160
Speaker 3: I like started like, Okay, let me figure out what

572
00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:16,159
Speaker 3: I can do to not be here anymore. So it

573
00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:19,080
Speaker 3: started in fourth grade and then it progressed through middle

574
00:28:19,119 --> 00:28:24,800
Speaker 3: school through high school. But I'm so grateful that I

575
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:31,160
Speaker 3: don't feel that way anymore. Tru I think residually those

576
00:28:31,200 --> 00:28:33,119
Speaker 3: feelings that kind of come up, cause it was so

577
00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:36,560
Speaker 3: much of my life I was. I just kind of

578
00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:40,160
Speaker 3: got accustomed to feeling to you know, I had indoctrinated

579
00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:43,360
Speaker 3: all of these negative feelings and thoughts about myself. So

580
00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:44,720
Speaker 3: it got to a point where I was like, this

581
00:28:44,760 --> 00:28:46,720
Speaker 3: is my being, this is my core being. I don't

582
00:28:46,800 --> 00:28:49,080
Speaker 3: like who I am. Y, this is to the core.

583
00:28:49,560 --> 00:28:53,240
Speaker 3: I hate who I am and what people have done

584
00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:58,480
Speaker 3: to me. And I felt like I deserved it at

585
00:28:58,480 --> 00:29:01,080
Speaker 3: a point in time, but I know that's not true now.

586
00:29:01,560 --> 00:29:04,080
Speaker 2: Trauma is never your fault, but never your healing is

587
00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:04,960
Speaker 2: your responsibility.

588
00:29:04,960 --> 00:29:06,520
Speaker 3: So healing is my responsibility.

589
00:29:06,600 --> 00:29:08,880
Speaker 2: When was that pivot? When did you realize like I

590
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:10,000
Speaker 2: got it, I got to heal.

591
00:29:10,640 --> 00:29:12,640
Speaker 3: I think I got to a point where I was like,

592
00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:16,240
Speaker 3: I'm tired of feeling this way about myself, Like there

593
00:29:16,280 --> 00:29:18,719
Speaker 3: has to be more to life for me than just

594
00:29:19,120 --> 00:29:22,840
Speaker 3: waking up every day and hating my existence. There has

595
00:29:22,880 --> 00:29:27,800
Speaker 3: to be more to life. And I started journaling because

596
00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:29,720
Speaker 3: I had already gone through therapy, and in my mind,

597
00:29:29,720 --> 00:29:32,920
Speaker 3: I told myself, therapy doesn't work, this medication doesn't work.

598
00:29:34,760 --> 00:29:38,120
Speaker 3: A lot of it was what do you call it,

599
00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:44,960
Speaker 3: like hardwired? So my grandmother struggle with her own battles,

600
00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 3: my mother struggle, my siblings struggle. It's kind of like

601
00:29:48,880 --> 00:29:51,720
Speaker 3: I don't want to say it's hereditary, but maybe it is.

602
00:29:53,120 --> 00:29:56,040
Speaker 3: Maybe it's hereditary. So it was like it got to

603
00:29:56,080 --> 00:29:58,320
Speaker 3: a point where I was like, I can't do this anymore,

604
00:29:58,360 --> 00:30:00,520
Speaker 3: Like I want to. I see everybody in in their life.

605
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:03,840
Speaker 3: I'm ready to enjoy my life. I'm ready to experience

606
00:30:03,880 --> 00:30:08,440
Speaker 3: it and a lens that isn't coming from this trauma,

607
00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:10,720
Speaker 3: Like I want to see what life really has for me.

608
00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:14,800
Speaker 3: And I started journaling. I started making music in that

609
00:30:14,880 --> 00:30:20,000
Speaker 3: process and really venting my frustrations and just kind of

610
00:30:20,640 --> 00:30:26,240
Speaker 3: journaling via this rap bea rap, And it started off

611
00:30:26,240 --> 00:30:27,760
Speaker 3: as rap. I never thought I was gonna be a rapper,

612
00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:29,200
Speaker 3: but it started off with rap because I was in

613
00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:33,240
Speaker 3: that angry phase of my healing. I was just mad

614
00:30:33,280 --> 00:30:35,240
Speaker 3: at the world, mad at everybody for letting me down,

615
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:38,800
Speaker 3: mad at my parents, mad at people who did things

616
00:30:38,840 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 3: to me, just mad at everybody. It was everybody's fault.

617
00:30:41,520 --> 00:30:46,320
Speaker 3: So RAP was like my first real outlet because I

618
00:30:46,360 --> 00:30:49,280
Speaker 3: was able to vent these frustrations in a very aggressive way.

619
00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:51,720
Speaker 3: And it still helps me though to this day. Like

620
00:30:51,760 --> 00:30:56,120
Speaker 3: I still will make a real aggressive record, but I

621
00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:59,040
Speaker 3: feel like it's helping me come to a calmer place

622
00:30:59,120 --> 00:31:01,640
Speaker 3: in the weird it's way. It's like this weird juxtaposition.

623
00:31:01,640 --> 00:31:03,680
Speaker 3: I'll make the most aggressive song and I'm like, all right,

624
00:31:03,680 --> 00:31:06,440
Speaker 3: I'm good, I'm chilling for the rest. I could chill now.

625
00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:07,680
Speaker 5: Yeah yeah.

626
00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:08,000
Speaker 6: Now.

627
00:31:08,360 --> 00:31:11,360
Speaker 4: You said your grandmother she worked in a mental institution.

628
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:14,400
Speaker 4: Yeah so, And you said she even had her own

629
00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:17,160
Speaker 4: as well. Do you think there was some correlation between

630
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:19,640
Speaker 4: where she was working or do you think.

631
00:31:19,640 --> 00:31:22,520
Speaker 5: That was I think she grew up too.

632
00:31:22,760 --> 00:31:26,400
Speaker 3: I think it's just generational, generational curses. Her mother had

633
00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:29,160
Speaker 3: her at fourteen, my great grandmother, And she said, my

634
00:31:29,160 --> 00:31:31,080
Speaker 3: great grandmother is still alive to this day. Thank god,

635
00:31:31,280 --> 00:31:34,479
Speaker 3: she was here. She was here during the wedding. She

636
00:31:34,520 --> 00:31:37,440
Speaker 3: had her at fourteen, so God knows what she experienced.

637
00:31:37,480 --> 00:31:40,400
Speaker 5: Gotcha, and you have had these conversations with her.

638
00:31:40,440 --> 00:31:42,600
Speaker 3: I've had these conversations with everybody. I'm one of them.

639
00:31:42,600 --> 00:31:44,480
Speaker 3: People were gonna talk. Yeah, I'm gonna talk with my

640
00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:46,040
Speaker 3: whole family because I want to get down to the

641
00:31:46,040 --> 00:31:49,520
Speaker 3: bottom of why do we act this way? What's happening? Like,

642
00:31:49,600 --> 00:31:53,360
Speaker 3: what has made us behave this way? And then she

643
00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:55,800
Speaker 3: did her part, but she kind of I feel like

644
00:31:55,800 --> 00:31:58,160
Speaker 3: she kind of ran to a degree, like she left,

645
00:31:58,280 --> 00:32:00,480
Speaker 3: she left her hometown, She went to college, and she

646
00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:04,080
Speaker 3: really put a lot of effort into her studies and

647
00:32:04,240 --> 00:32:07,160
Speaker 3: she works. She's a workaholic. To this day. She refuses

648
00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:10,880
Speaker 3: to retire and she's had two strokes. She refuses to

649
00:32:10,960 --> 00:32:14,719
Speaker 3: retire because she just I notices her way of coping

650
00:32:15,600 --> 00:32:17,720
Speaker 3: with everything that it is that she deals with the

651
00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:21,640
Speaker 3: pressures in the stresses of being a matriarch. And then

652
00:32:21,680 --> 00:32:23,960
Speaker 3: I feel like that trickled down to my mom. And

653
00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:28,360
Speaker 3: my mom struggled with her own battles growing up and

654
00:32:28,520 --> 00:32:30,400
Speaker 3: even as an adult. And I feel like as an adult,

655
00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:38,440
Speaker 3: her having me caught the I caught the the I

656
00:32:38,520 --> 00:32:41,040
Speaker 3: caught a little bit of what she was struggling with,

657
00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:45,240
Speaker 3: you know. And that's not too that's to humanize her,

658
00:32:45,280 --> 00:32:48,880
Speaker 3: if anything, because I feel like we especially young Black girls,

659
00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:52,040
Speaker 3: oldest girls, oldest Black girls there human they were, they

660
00:32:52,040 --> 00:32:54,200
Speaker 3: would hear me and they would understand where I'm coming

661
00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:59,640
Speaker 3: from as an older as an older sister, you are

662
00:33:00,400 --> 00:33:07,320
Speaker 3: kind of you're adultified and you don't really get to

663
00:33:07,400 --> 00:33:10,840
Speaker 3: experience your childhood the way that you're supposed to. And

664
00:33:11,160 --> 00:33:15,600
Speaker 3: I always feel like that And it was because of,

665
00:33:15,800 --> 00:33:18,080
Speaker 3: like I said, my mom was struggling with her own things.

666
00:33:19,400 --> 00:33:23,840
Speaker 3: And I hope when she hears this, she knows that

667
00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:27,960
Speaker 3: it's not too pass judgment on her. I love my mother,

668
00:33:28,320 --> 00:33:32,120
Speaker 3: that's like she's my baby. I love her, and it's

669
00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:35,000
Speaker 3: not to be judgmental towards her, but it's just to

670
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:39,160
Speaker 3: open up the space to have these conversations that are

671
00:33:39,200 --> 00:33:42,640
Speaker 3: so uncomfortable to have. But I want her to know

672
00:33:42,680 --> 00:33:47,280
Speaker 3: that I'm proud of her for doing what she could

673
00:33:48,080 --> 00:33:50,600
Speaker 3: with us. And I think things happen in the process

674
00:33:50,760 --> 00:33:56,240
Speaker 3: and all we can do is move forward and heal

675
00:33:57,160 --> 00:34:01,000
Speaker 3: and learn to love each other through through raw struggles,

676
00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:05,920
Speaker 3: through our mishaps. So I think it's been passed down

677
00:34:06,080 --> 00:34:09,640
Speaker 3: from generation the generation, but it definitely stops with me.

678
00:34:10,560 --> 00:34:10,880
Speaker 6: Trauma.

679
00:34:11,239 --> 00:34:13,120
Speaker 2: Trauma runs in your family till it runs into you

680
00:34:13,800 --> 00:34:16,839
Speaker 2: running me, and I believe that our parents they would

681
00:34:16,840 --> 00:34:18,440
Speaker 2: have they were just trying to survive.

682
00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:19,080
Speaker 1: I feel like.

683
00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:21,360
Speaker 2: We're the general We're the first generation that has the

684
00:34:21,520 --> 00:34:24,319
Speaker 2: luxury of healing. Like you know, they didn't have the

685
00:34:24,440 --> 00:34:29,360
Speaker 2: resources and that that that that that we got. We

686
00:34:29,360 --> 00:34:32,120
Speaker 2: weren't talking about anxiety and depression.

687
00:34:32,719 --> 00:34:36,560
Speaker 3: Then, and these resources are readily available to us, and

688
00:34:36,600 --> 00:34:39,800
Speaker 3: they're promoted almost. I feel like I've seen a rise

689
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:42,640
Speaker 3: in people promoting taking care of your mental health and

690
00:34:42,680 --> 00:34:45,279
Speaker 3: I love that. And I also have my own organization,

691
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:48,680
Speaker 3: Stay One More Day, where I promote people healing and

692
00:34:48,680 --> 00:34:51,400
Speaker 3: focusing on staying another day. Until you get to a

693
00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:52,799
Speaker 3: point where you're happy to be here.

694
00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:56,040
Speaker 4: Well, you're definitely supposed to be here. I think it

695
00:34:57,360 --> 00:35:00,000
Speaker 4: was God's plan for you not to take your life

696
00:34:59,600 --> 00:35:02,360
Speaker 4: and the grade at eight years old. You are a baby,

697
00:35:02,400 --> 00:35:04,600
Speaker 4: you know, So I'm glad that you are here. And

698
00:35:04,640 --> 00:35:10,080
Speaker 4: then you're breaking generational curses. So when you got pregnant,

699
00:35:10,360 --> 00:35:13,080
Speaker 4: what was that like? Because now you're a mother, you know,

700
00:35:13,360 --> 00:35:17,160
Speaker 4: and you replayed things in your mind like, oh my god,

701
00:35:17,239 --> 00:35:18,320
Speaker 4: I grew up this way.

702
00:35:18,440 --> 00:35:20,279
Speaker 5: I'm not going to allow my son or my daughter

703
00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:21,840
Speaker 5: because you didn't know what you were having at that time.

704
00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:23,440
Speaker 3: Don't didn't know to deal with but I kind of

705
00:35:23,520 --> 00:35:25,759
Speaker 3: knew to a degree because I had a dream. One

706
00:35:25,760 --> 00:35:27,759
Speaker 3: thing about me, I'm a dreamer. I feel like my

707
00:35:28,600 --> 00:35:31,080
Speaker 3: these spirits that come to me in these dreams. My friends.

708
00:35:31,080 --> 00:35:32,759
Speaker 3: I had a dream and my homegirl who passed away,

709
00:35:32,760 --> 00:35:34,640
Speaker 3: her them is saving. She told me in a dream

710
00:35:34,640 --> 00:35:36,120
Speaker 3: that I was pregnant and that I was having a

711
00:35:36,160 --> 00:35:39,200
Speaker 3: boy the month that I conceived my son. So I

712
00:35:39,200 --> 00:35:40,040
Speaker 3: feel like I kind of you.

713
00:35:41,480 --> 00:35:44,200
Speaker 6: Yeah, I told him that the regular dream like became

714
00:35:44,280 --> 00:35:45,719
Speaker 6: my dream last night and told me we were having

715
00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:46,040
Speaker 6: a boy.

716
00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:48,319
Speaker 5: Yeah, so y'all planned baby boy?

717
00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:52,160
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, we did because we had a candidly speaking,

718
00:35:52,200 --> 00:35:55,759
Speaker 3: we had a miscarriage first about nine months before then.

719
00:35:57,160 --> 00:35:59,759
Speaker 3: And that also, and I'll talk about this a lot too.

720
00:36:00,560 --> 00:36:02,319
Speaker 3: And also it's like I talk about a lot of shit.

721
00:36:02,400 --> 00:36:05,200
Speaker 3: I'm not trying to be the spokesperson for anything either.

722
00:36:05,640 --> 00:36:07,360
Speaker 3: I want to make that very clear. I'm telling you,

723
00:36:07,840 --> 00:36:09,720
Speaker 3: I'm just detailing my experiences.

724
00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:11,399
Speaker 5: So I don't want to which is gonna help.

725
00:36:11,680 --> 00:36:14,680
Speaker 3: It's gonna help. It's gonna help because you don't realize

726
00:36:14,680 --> 00:36:16,839
Speaker 3: how many people go through these things until you meet

727
00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:18,880
Speaker 3: somebody who's ready to talk about it, and I'm ready

728
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:21,799
Speaker 3: to talk about it. There was a lot of I

729
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:25,000
Speaker 3: had been told that I had these cysts, and then

730
00:36:25,040 --> 00:36:28,560
Speaker 3: I went to I got multiple different evaluations. They were like, oh, yeah,

731
00:36:28,600 --> 00:36:31,400
Speaker 3: you have assist. It's five centimeters six six centimeters. It

732
00:36:31,440 --> 00:36:33,919
Speaker 3: needs to be removed immediately. And then other people, other

733
00:36:33,960 --> 00:36:36,560
Speaker 3: doctors were like, oh, I don't see any cists. So

734
00:36:36,600 --> 00:36:39,279
Speaker 3: it was just like it was so much going on

735
00:36:39,360 --> 00:36:41,840
Speaker 3: at the time. So when I found out that I

736
00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:44,080
Speaker 3: was pregnant with my son, I was very protective over

737
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:46,680
Speaker 3: that process and I didn't even announce that I was

738
00:36:46,680 --> 00:36:49,520
Speaker 3: pregnant until I was eight months. And then when we

739
00:36:49,560 --> 00:36:52,680
Speaker 3: had them, we had a home birth at Amazing, had

740
00:36:52,719 --> 00:36:54,839
Speaker 3: it in our kitchen, and my grandmother was there, My

741
00:36:54,920 --> 00:36:58,200
Speaker 3: mother was there, both my grandmother's actually his mom was there,

742
00:36:58,239 --> 00:37:04,000
Speaker 3: his sisters, my brother was they're his brothers. My dad

743
00:37:04,080 --> 00:37:07,080
Speaker 3: was there. It was a whole and it was a

744
00:37:07,200 --> 00:37:11,880
Speaker 3: very strange experience because it was such a vulnerable experience

745
00:37:11,920 --> 00:37:15,319
Speaker 3: for me. But again, it was one of those things

746
00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:17,560
Speaker 3: that was like, I feel like I feel called to

747
00:37:17,600 --> 00:37:20,799
Speaker 3: do this because my mother and my grandmother, they both

748
00:37:20,880 --> 00:37:22,879
Speaker 3: my mother had all sea sections with all her kids.

749
00:37:22,920 --> 00:37:24,600
Speaker 3: They told her she was she would never be able

750
00:37:24,600 --> 00:37:28,279
Speaker 3: to deliver naturally or like vaginantly. They told her she

751
00:37:28,280 --> 00:37:31,480
Speaker 3: would never be able to do that. By the way,

752
00:37:31,520 --> 00:37:31,839
Speaker 3: it's a lot.

753
00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:33,680
Speaker 1: They told my wife that for her second daughter, and

754
00:37:33,719 --> 00:37:34,840
Speaker 1: she had next to.

755
00:37:35,560 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 3: They told me the same thing. They told me the

756
00:37:37,600 --> 00:37:39,880
Speaker 3: same thing, literally told me the same thing. And then

757
00:37:39,880 --> 00:37:41,920
Speaker 3: my grandmother she almost died having my mom. She only

758
00:37:41,960 --> 00:37:43,960
Speaker 3: has one child, which is my mom, and she almost

759
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:45,760
Speaker 3: died having nurse SOEs she never had any other kids.

760
00:37:46,120 --> 00:37:48,280
Speaker 3: So it was important for me to heal that trauma

761
00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:51,719
Speaker 3: for the matriarchs in my family and show them that

762
00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:53,279
Speaker 3: because when I first told them, they were like, what

763
00:37:53,320 --> 00:37:54,960
Speaker 3: are you thinking about? Like you canna have a baby

764
00:37:55,040 --> 00:37:56,360
Speaker 3: at home? Are you sure?

765
00:37:56,560 --> 00:37:59,920
Speaker 6: They were telling her that she needed to she might

766
00:38:00,080 --> 00:38:01,239
Speaker 6: have to do Session two.

767
00:38:01,320 --> 00:38:04,959
Speaker 3: Yeah, they were telling me, and the doctors were telling

768
00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:08,040
Speaker 3: me that I shouldn't. But I don't want to advise

769
00:38:08,080 --> 00:38:11,480
Speaker 3: anybody against any doctor's orders, because there are doctors out

770
00:38:11,520 --> 00:38:14,640
Speaker 3: there that are diligent and that are thorough with the

771
00:38:14,680 --> 00:38:18,160
Speaker 3: work that they do. But again, I'm just going off

772
00:38:18,200 --> 00:38:21,239
Speaker 3: of what I feel called to do, and very early

773
00:38:21,280 --> 00:38:23,880
Speaker 3: on within like the first six or twelve weeks of

774
00:38:23,920 --> 00:38:25,959
Speaker 3: me being pregnant with my son, I was like going back.

775
00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:26,160
Speaker 1: And for it.

776
00:38:26,200 --> 00:38:27,759
Speaker 3: I was like, Noah, I'm doing a home birth.

777
00:38:27,920 --> 00:38:28,080
Speaker 2: Yeah.

778
00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:30,080
Speaker 3: So I got a midwife, I got a doula, and

779
00:38:30,200 --> 00:38:30,960
Speaker 3: I have my family.

780
00:38:31,320 --> 00:38:34,720
Speaker 1: That's what we got to do it for third and fourth.

781
00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:35,839
Speaker 5: That's the best way.

782
00:38:35,920 --> 00:38:37,960
Speaker 3: I had natural births or y'all just had a duel

783
00:38:38,080 --> 00:38:39,960
Speaker 3: at the hospital to advocate for y'all.

784
00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:42,920
Speaker 1: My wife had a natural birth, not because she wanted to.

785
00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:45,760
Speaker 3: On the third one was it was happening so fast.

786
00:38:45,880 --> 00:38:47,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, there was something going on with the hospital where

787
00:38:47,560 --> 00:38:49,640
Speaker 2: it was. She always gets I tell the story wrong,

788
00:38:49,680 --> 00:38:51,200
Speaker 2: but if something they couldn't get the abadoros or something

789
00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:52,520
Speaker 2: like that. So she ended up having a natural but

790
00:38:52,560 --> 00:38:54,279
Speaker 2: she we just decided to get a do it for

791
00:38:54,320 --> 00:38:55,919
Speaker 2: the third and fourth because it's so hard when black

792
00:38:55,920 --> 00:38:57,719
Speaker 2: women go to the hospital, like you can't play with

793
00:38:57,719 --> 00:39:00,320
Speaker 2: that the way the black maternal death rad is actly.

794
00:39:01,120 --> 00:39:03,360
Speaker 3: So that was all that was on my mind. I

795
00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:04,560
Speaker 3: wanted to take care of myself.

796
00:39:04,719 --> 00:39:04,959
Speaker 2: Yeah.

797
00:39:05,480 --> 00:39:08,279
Speaker 4: So now you got your music, yep, and then you

798
00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:11,800
Speaker 4: you turn your you know, your pain into a beautiful

799
00:39:12,480 --> 00:39:13,400
Speaker 4: you know, oh.

800
00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:14,839
Speaker 1: You know y'all got something in common. Then you study

801
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:15,640
Speaker 1: mortuary science.

802
00:39:15,680 --> 00:39:21,320
Speaker 3: I did, okay, just a mortuary all. What you study

803
00:39:21,360 --> 00:39:22,000
Speaker 3: mortual science?

804
00:39:22,080 --> 00:39:24,799
Speaker 5: Girl, I went for one semester and I couldn't do it.

805
00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:25,719
Speaker 3: It was too much.

806
00:39:25,800 --> 00:39:27,960
Speaker 5: It was too much, the whole embovement. And then you know,

807
00:39:28,080 --> 00:39:29,120
Speaker 5: limbs's alive.

808
00:39:29,520 --> 00:39:32,439
Speaker 1: If you do too much, they jump.

809
00:39:32,920 --> 00:39:36,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, girl, fart, that would happen, like all the screamed,

810
00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:39,919
Speaker 3: they let the noises, they let.

811
00:39:41,640 --> 00:39:41,680
Speaker 2: It.

812
00:39:41,760 --> 00:39:44,640
Speaker 3: Yeah. The nerves are like settling basically, so they jerk

813
00:39:44,680 --> 00:39:48,080
Speaker 3: and they move and they all and.

814
00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:51,000
Speaker 4: Then everybody is the one and you're working and you chilling,

815
00:39:51,040 --> 00:39:52,719
Speaker 4: and you going break and you got your back turn

816
00:39:53,080 --> 00:39:55,080
Speaker 4: and then you look, you see I can give somebody

817
00:39:55,080 --> 00:39:55,560
Speaker 4: seeing up.

818
00:39:55,840 --> 00:39:58,040
Speaker 5: It's a little you know, and then like.

819
00:39:59,480 --> 00:40:00,319
Speaker 1: The dead body sit up.

820
00:40:00,400 --> 00:40:02,480
Speaker 3: No, I did not see it. When I was in

821
00:40:02,520 --> 00:40:04,759
Speaker 3: mortuary school. They were, they had they told us that

822
00:40:04,960 --> 00:40:07,920
Speaker 3: was a possibility, But I never seen that personally. But

823
00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:10,719
Speaker 3: I have seen, like you know, bodies jerk and move

824
00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:13,480
Speaker 3: and make these noises and these liquids to come out.

825
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:15,280
Speaker 3: Like I've seen the whole thing.

826
00:40:15,280 --> 00:40:17,680
Speaker 5: And so you actually went through the whole thing.

827
00:40:18,080 --> 00:40:22,080
Speaker 3: I didn't graduate because I started rapping midway through and

828
00:40:22,200 --> 00:40:23,959
Speaker 3: I was like, all right, bet, I'm doing this one.

829
00:40:24,200 --> 00:40:25,840
Speaker 5: I didn't graduate because I got scared.

830
00:40:27,680 --> 00:40:28,560
Speaker 3: I understand it was.

831
00:40:30,120 --> 00:40:31,440
Speaker 1: Working at the mortuary first of all.

832
00:40:31,520 --> 00:40:34,680
Speaker 3: No, but you have to you have to internship during

833
00:40:34,680 --> 00:40:36,480
Speaker 3: your school. By the time you graduate, you have to

834
00:40:36,480 --> 00:40:39,080
Speaker 3: have been done or else you can't graduate. You have

835
00:40:39,120 --> 00:40:41,480
Speaker 3: to finish your internship. So you do it while you're in.

836
00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:44,319
Speaker 5: School, right, to get your hours, to get your.

837
00:40:44,200 --> 00:40:47,680
Speaker 3: Hours yet yeah, yeah.

838
00:40:47,800 --> 00:40:51,840
Speaker 7: Because you started with Life after Death and then it

839
00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:53,640
Speaker 7: just and then who did the Body? I was like,

840
00:40:53,680 --> 00:40:57,040
Speaker 7: what is her thing with like life after Death? Literally

841
00:40:57,120 --> 00:40:59,120
Speaker 7: like it's kind of all centered around it and it's

842
00:40:59,160 --> 00:41:01,160
Speaker 7: very like church, cheap Baptist.

843
00:41:00,840 --> 00:41:02,640
Speaker 3: Church, it is exactly.

844
00:41:02,800 --> 00:41:05,239
Speaker 7: I'm like, it feels like a funeral at first, and

845
00:41:05,280 --> 00:41:07,040
Speaker 7: then it goes into a whole different world.

846
00:41:07,040 --> 00:41:11,200
Speaker 3: Exactly I did. I did so culturally I feel like

847
00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:13,360
Speaker 3: this project for me culturally who did the body? You know,

848
00:41:13,400 --> 00:41:15,680
Speaker 3: when black people go to a funeral, if the body

849
00:41:15,680 --> 00:41:17,160
Speaker 3: looked good or bad? Where I was like, who did

850
00:41:17,160 --> 00:41:28,000
Speaker 3: the body? To see? Which were home? Never who did

851
00:41:28,000 --> 00:41:30,000
Speaker 3: the body? Like it's one of the two. So culturally

852
00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:32,319
Speaker 3: it was living but also like like I was just

853
00:41:32,360 --> 00:41:34,400
Speaker 3: talking about I had so many I've just had a

854
00:41:34,440 --> 00:41:39,279
Speaker 3: really weird experience with life, and I've also had weird

855
00:41:39,280 --> 00:41:42,120
Speaker 3: experiences with death. So this project for me was kind

856
00:41:42,160 --> 00:41:45,200
Speaker 3: of liberating me in that sense and freeing me from

857
00:41:45,440 --> 00:41:47,839
Speaker 3: the fears of death. But we're all and just also

858
00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:51,840
Speaker 3: talking about just opening up that conversation about grief in

859
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:55,000
Speaker 3: our community and insurance and that type of stuff like

860
00:41:55,040 --> 00:41:58,240
Speaker 3: that was important to me to highlight with this project.

861
00:41:58,560 --> 00:42:00,879
Speaker 3: So it's and it is very so Baptist. I grew

862
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:03,520
Speaker 3: up Baptists. My grandmother was. She was a youth minister

863
00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:06,840
Speaker 3: on my dad's side, so she made me sing in

864
00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:09,640
Speaker 3: the church every Sunday. I had no choice. Even if

865
00:42:09,640 --> 00:42:11,600
Speaker 3: I was nervous or scared, I had no choice. So

866
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:14,759
Speaker 3: those are really my roots. I grew up with a

867
00:42:14,800 --> 00:42:18,800
Speaker 3: praying grandmother, so those are truly, truly, truly my roots.

868
00:42:18,800 --> 00:42:21,520
Speaker 3: So I wanted to just highlight Southern Black American culture

869
00:42:21,760 --> 00:42:22,480
Speaker 3: with this project.

870
00:42:22,719 --> 00:42:24,960
Speaker 1: How do they feel about you doing this secular music? Now?

871
00:42:25,600 --> 00:42:25,840
Speaker 6: You know?

872
00:42:27,480 --> 00:42:30,920
Speaker 3: They My granny cuss though, so it's like she, you know,

873
00:42:31,600 --> 00:42:34,400
Speaker 3: you know how Baptist people are. It's like we real Baptists,

874
00:42:34,440 --> 00:42:36,200
Speaker 3: but outside the church, we like to turn up and

875
00:42:36,239 --> 00:42:38,920
Speaker 3: have a good time. So it's like my granny, she cussed,

876
00:42:39,120 --> 00:42:42,279
Speaker 3: she was crazy. She is crazy, So I know it's

877
00:42:42,320 --> 00:42:45,759
Speaker 3: like she can find a little bit of herself and

878
00:42:45,760 --> 00:42:47,960
Speaker 3: that I am my grandmother's baby. So it's like, boo,

879
00:42:48,040 --> 00:42:49,759
Speaker 3: where did I learn this from? But other than you

880
00:42:50,080 --> 00:42:52,480
Speaker 3: and my mom, I got this from y'all, So how

881
00:42:52,480 --> 00:42:53,160
Speaker 3: can you really be?

882
00:42:53,840 --> 00:42:54,080
Speaker 6: They?

883
00:42:54,120 --> 00:42:55,560
Speaker 3: They love it, they support it.

884
00:42:56,000 --> 00:42:58,000
Speaker 1: What did Jesus turn the water into water for? If

885
00:42:58,000 --> 00:42:58,760
Speaker 1: not for a party?

886
00:42:58,840 --> 00:43:00,000
Speaker 3: If not for a party, you know what I'm saying,

887
00:43:00,200 --> 00:43:01,839
Speaker 3: Not for a good turn up. You know what I mean?

888
00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:02,239
Speaker 1: Hello?

889
00:43:02,360 --> 00:43:04,759
Speaker 4: Okay, maybe for a different taste. You know they only

890
00:43:04,800 --> 00:43:06,680
Speaker 4: had water bag then he probably like, let's say something else.

891
00:43:06,760 --> 00:43:09,319
Speaker 3: But I'm saying you could have turned into apple juice, oranges,

892
00:43:09,360 --> 00:43:11,759
Speaker 3: any of the things wine he was trying to turn up,

893
00:43:11,760 --> 00:43:13,520
Speaker 3: and I feel I feel him.

894
00:43:13,560 --> 00:43:18,120
Speaker 4: Okay, now beating down your block? That was my anthem

895
00:43:18,719 --> 00:43:20,080
Speaker 4: like three years.

896
00:43:19,960 --> 00:43:22,120
Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm not playing. Did you expect that song to

897
00:43:22,120 --> 00:43:23,120
Speaker 5: be as big as it got?

898
00:43:23,600 --> 00:43:26,120
Speaker 3: I expected it to change my life. I don't know

899
00:43:26,120 --> 00:43:28,719
Speaker 3: about I didn't know exactly what the parameters. I didn't

900
00:43:28,719 --> 00:43:30,080
Speaker 3: know how big it was gonna get, but I knew

901
00:43:30,080 --> 00:43:31,960
Speaker 3: it was going. I knew it was pivotal in my life.

902
00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:35,080
Speaker 3: And when I talk about journaling and writing that I

903
00:43:35,120 --> 00:43:36,560
Speaker 3: was gonna be on Breakfast Club, that was this is

904
00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:38,719
Speaker 3: around the time that I made that song. I was like, Yeah,

905
00:43:38,920 --> 00:43:41,520
Speaker 3: I'm gonna be on Breakfast Club. I'm gonna be getting interviewed,

906
00:43:41,560 --> 00:43:44,200
Speaker 3: I'm be getting plaques. Like I knew, I had a

907
00:43:44,239 --> 00:43:46,880
Speaker 3: feeling in my bones that that song was going to

908
00:43:46,960 --> 00:43:48,680
Speaker 3: change my life, and it did just that.

909
00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:50,200
Speaker 5: I love it.

910
00:43:50,280 --> 00:43:52,000
Speaker 3: And I'm at that second phase too, where I feel

911
00:43:52,040 --> 00:43:56,920
Speaker 3: like these next few songs that I'm dropping in this project,

912
00:43:56,920 --> 00:43:58,719
Speaker 3: I feel like it's also going to elevate my life.

913
00:43:58,760 --> 00:44:01,080
Speaker 3: I feel like even Sexy Solon has elevated my life

914
00:44:01,080 --> 00:44:02,839
Speaker 3: to an agree with all the good and the bad.

915
00:44:03,320 --> 00:44:06,040
Speaker 3: Talk about it and also thank you Charlemagne for posting

916
00:44:06,040 --> 00:44:08,120
Speaker 3: that for me. I appreciate you for exposing that to

917
00:44:08,160 --> 00:44:10,279
Speaker 3: an audience who might dad have seen that, an older

918
00:44:10,320 --> 00:44:13,160
Speaker 3: audience that like my dad, my mom's generation, who might

919
00:44:13,160 --> 00:44:16,160
Speaker 3: not have seen it. I feel like it definitely is

920
00:44:16,200 --> 00:44:19,040
Speaker 3: taking my life to a new tier as well, new fans,

921
00:44:19,800 --> 00:44:25,000
Speaker 3: new levels conversation too. It causes conversation, which was fine.

922
00:44:25,680 --> 00:44:27,399
Speaker 3: I'm cool with the good I'm cool with the bad.

923
00:44:27,440 --> 00:44:29,680
Speaker 3: It was. I just wanted to usher in the conversation.

924
00:44:29,840 --> 00:44:31,799
Speaker 4: So what I love about it? You were still a

925
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:33,600
Speaker 4: little too nice. She was like, you were just telling

926
00:44:33,560 --> 00:44:34,719
Speaker 4: them all black people to go to the bad.

927
00:44:34,760 --> 00:44:35,720
Speaker 5: You ain't saying it out.

928
00:44:35,680 --> 00:44:40,160
Speaker 3: No, I just said, create a level of you know,

929
00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:43,919
Speaker 3: separation to a degree, not trying to segregate nig because

930
00:44:43,920 --> 00:44:47,319
Speaker 3: I'm just saying, like, give us our space to congregate,

931
00:44:47,400 --> 00:44:50,960
Speaker 3: frightnize fellowship for two minutes. I wanted to create a

932
00:44:51,000 --> 00:44:53,120
Speaker 3: space for Black Americans to turn up and have a

933
00:44:53,120 --> 00:44:55,240
Speaker 3: good time Black people in general, because I know people

934
00:44:55,239 --> 00:44:58,399
Speaker 3: were like, what is this for Black Americas for It

935
00:44:58,440 --> 00:45:01,880
Speaker 3: was like I wanted to promote black unity and black community,

936
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:04,279
Speaker 3: which is why you see me depicted cloaked in this

937
00:45:04,400 --> 00:45:06,720
Speaker 3: black American hairt juste flag, which I want to encourage

938
00:45:06,719 --> 00:45:09,719
Speaker 3: people to support and buy straight from the source. You

939
00:45:09,760 --> 00:45:11,960
Speaker 3: can get it on Black Lettic, where Black Litics is

940
00:45:12,000 --> 00:45:14,040
Speaker 3: not sponsored, by the way, not smart set at all.

941
00:45:14,080 --> 00:45:16,200
Speaker 3: I just want to I saw people were buying the flag,

942
00:45:16,440 --> 00:45:18,239
Speaker 3: and you can kind of buy these dupes from like

943
00:45:18,320 --> 00:45:21,880
Speaker 3: Amazon and different like Chinese vendors, and I want to

944
00:45:21,920 --> 00:45:24,560
Speaker 3: encourage people to shop straight from the source, which is

945
00:45:24,600 --> 00:45:27,480
Speaker 3: where black letics. He collaborated. His name is Rodney. He

946
00:45:27,520 --> 00:45:31,520
Speaker 3: collaborated with Joy, who is the daughter of Melvin Charles,

947
00:45:31,560 --> 00:45:33,959
Speaker 3: who was a co creator of the Black American hairt

948
00:45:33,960 --> 00:45:36,480
Speaker 3: Juste flag. So and I had to talk with her

949
00:45:36,480 --> 00:45:38,359
Speaker 3: earlier this week because I well, a couple weeks ago,

950
00:45:38,360 --> 00:45:40,320
Speaker 3: because I wanted to make sure that I had the

951
00:45:40,360 --> 00:45:43,439
Speaker 3: origin story of the Black American Haritge flag correct, which

952
00:45:43,480 --> 00:45:46,200
Speaker 3: is basically they created it in nineteen sixty seven to

953
00:45:46,600 --> 00:45:51,720
Speaker 3: basically acknowledge Black Americans for their contributions to America because

954
00:45:51,760 --> 00:45:55,120
Speaker 3: and it also just create some representation because at the time,

955
00:45:55,160 --> 00:45:58,120
Speaker 3: we were being identified as negroes, like they didn't really want

956
00:45:58,120 --> 00:46:00,480
Speaker 3: to acknowledge us as people. We didn't have our own flag.

957
00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:03,480
Speaker 3: We were kind of like they were paying us dust.

958
00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:05,880
Speaker 3: And so they created this flag so that we can

959
00:46:06,520 --> 00:46:09,440
Speaker 3: fly it and represent the Black American culture and our

960
00:46:09,480 --> 00:46:12,120
Speaker 3: contributions to this country. So and a lot of people

961
00:46:12,160 --> 00:46:14,439
Speaker 3: at the time didn't really resonate with the American flag either,

962
00:46:14,480 --> 00:46:16,520
Speaker 3: So it was like we had something of our own.

963
00:46:16,760 --> 00:46:19,760
Speaker 3: So you see me cloaked in the Black American Heritage

964
00:46:19,800 --> 00:46:21,480
Speaker 3: flag and the video, but then you also see the

965
00:46:21,480 --> 00:46:24,880
Speaker 3: flags behind me, the ethnic flags behind me stitched together

966
00:46:25,880 --> 00:46:29,839
Speaker 3: Nigerian flags, and you know, and I wanted to make

967
00:46:29,880 --> 00:46:32,439
Speaker 3: sure what was important to me was, like I said,

968
00:46:32,440 --> 00:46:35,400
Speaker 3: to promote black unity and black community because under the

969
00:46:35,480 --> 00:46:38,640
Speaker 3: umbrella of white supremacy and racism, we are all black

970
00:46:38,880 --> 00:46:42,000
Speaker 3: here in this country and cops pull us over. Then

971
00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:44,799
Speaker 3: I asked you here are you Jamaican? Are you? Where

972
00:46:44,800 --> 00:46:48,200
Speaker 3: are you from? Fact, they're not asking that you just black.

973
00:46:49,000 --> 00:46:53,160
Speaker 3: So I wanted to detail these shared experiences across the diaspora.

974
00:46:53,640 --> 00:46:55,480
Speaker 3: And I know what It's upset a couple of people,

975
00:46:55,520 --> 00:46:57,759
Speaker 3: which I can understand to a degree, because I feel

976
00:46:57,760 --> 00:47:01,120
Speaker 3: like Black Americans we want so badly to be represented

977
00:47:01,120 --> 00:47:03,239
Speaker 3: and we want something of our own because it feel

978
00:47:03,239 --> 00:47:05,240
Speaker 3: like people have taken from our culture. And I understand

979
00:47:05,239 --> 00:47:08,280
Speaker 3: that to a degree and still do so. I understand

980
00:47:08,320 --> 00:47:11,400
Speaker 3: the frustration about incorporating the other flags. But I'm just

981
00:47:11,400 --> 00:47:13,680
Speaker 3: here to detail what I was trying to depict, and

982
00:47:13,680 --> 00:47:17,359
Speaker 3: that was black unity and black community. And I'm not

983
00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:21,319
Speaker 3: trying to divide the diaspora. That will never be my intentions. Unfortunately,

984
00:47:21,400 --> 00:47:23,239
Speaker 3: that's just not what I'm trying to do.

985
00:47:23,480 --> 00:47:23,960
Speaker 5: I love it.

986
00:47:24,000 --> 00:47:25,400
Speaker 3: I'm here to bring us together.

987
00:47:25,960 --> 00:47:27,600
Speaker 2: You had When I went to go search the song

988
00:47:27,680 --> 00:47:29,840
Speaker 2: that morning on YouTube, and all I saw was reaction

989
00:47:29,960 --> 00:47:31,000
Speaker 2: videos of people upset.

990
00:47:31,239 --> 00:47:34,160
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, they was mad here, Like.

991
00:47:35,880 --> 00:47:37,719
Speaker 1: Like, is this really it's mad already? I'm like, when

992
00:47:37,719 --> 00:47:39,760
Speaker 1: this song came about, it's only six days ago.

993
00:47:39,760 --> 00:47:43,320
Speaker 3: Exactly, they were mad. I was. I expected white people

994
00:47:43,320 --> 00:47:44,840
Speaker 3: to be mad. I real don't give a damn what

995
00:47:44,840 --> 00:47:47,000
Speaker 3: white people think about me. I expected for them to

996
00:47:47,000 --> 00:47:50,400
Speaker 3: be mad. I got that. That made sense to me

997
00:47:50,840 --> 00:47:54,319
Speaker 3: because white people his thing with white people, And it's

998
00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:57,440
Speaker 3: not that I'm saying that all white people are bad, right,

999
00:47:58,200 --> 00:48:01,040
Speaker 3: you know, they be saying like I got a black

1000
00:48:01,080 --> 00:48:04,759
Speaker 3: best friend. My best friend is white. You know, I's

1001
00:48:04,800 --> 00:48:06,520
Speaker 3: taking a page out of they book. So it's not

1002
00:48:06,520 --> 00:48:09,520
Speaker 3: that I'm saying white people are bad. But I think she.

1003
00:48:09,560 --> 00:48:20,560
Speaker 1: Wasn't in the video. Everybody somebody said that to me

1004
00:48:20,600 --> 00:48:22,399
Speaker 1: this morning. It was like, she got a Latino best friend,

1005
00:48:22,480 --> 00:48:22,959
Speaker 1: Oh my.

1006
00:48:22,880 --> 00:48:23,960
Speaker 3: God, just because she's tatty.

1007
00:48:24,120 --> 00:48:24,920
Speaker 1: I promise.

1008
00:48:28,200 --> 00:48:31,319
Speaker 3: That's my best friend. But it's like, I feel like

1009
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:35,600
Speaker 3: white people what they need to understand is that they've

1010
00:48:35,600 --> 00:48:42,479
Speaker 3: been conditioned a certain type of way under this because

1011
00:48:42,520 --> 00:48:45,040
Speaker 3: I feel like racism is a fundamental issue, and they've

1012
00:48:45,080 --> 00:48:48,759
Speaker 3: been conditioned to this certain type of teaching in this

1013
00:48:48,880 --> 00:48:54,160
Speaker 3: certain type of way subconsciously. So I feel like, consciously

1014
00:48:54,400 --> 00:48:56,360
Speaker 3: it needs to be called out and it needs to

1015
00:48:56,400 --> 00:48:58,920
Speaker 3: be unlearned. That's my only thing that I want to

1016
00:48:58,920 --> 00:49:01,000
Speaker 3: make clearest, not that I'm saying a white people are bad.

1017
00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:03,200
Speaker 3: So they were mad. I didn't give a damn about that.

1018
00:49:03,320 --> 00:49:05,200
Speaker 3: I ain't care. And they were like, well, what if

1019
00:49:05,200 --> 00:49:07,920
Speaker 3: white people made a song like this? White people have

1020
00:49:08,000 --> 00:49:11,160
Speaker 3: done worse. Let's be clear, they've done way worse in

1021
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:14,120
Speaker 3: real life. And there is a song, actually I saw

1022
00:49:14,200 --> 00:49:19,759
Speaker 3: the other day there was a song exactly exactly, so

1023
00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:21,920
Speaker 3: it's like, what the hell are we talking about? What

1024
00:49:21,960 --> 00:49:25,839
Speaker 3: are we talking about? But yeah, I expected them to

1025
00:49:25,840 --> 00:49:27,640
Speaker 3: be mad, but I didn't expect for so many people

1026
00:49:28,120 --> 00:49:30,399
Speaker 3: in my community to be upset. And then I kind

1027
00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:32,120
Speaker 3: of like did my homework and I'm like, what is

1028
00:49:32,160 --> 00:49:35,400
Speaker 3: it that is upsetting people? And I got down to

1029
00:49:35,400 --> 00:49:36,719
Speaker 3: the root of it, and I'm like, all right, I

1030
00:49:36,760 --> 00:49:42,840
Speaker 3: see what's happening here. I can't listen. I can't do

1031
00:49:42,880 --> 00:49:45,520
Speaker 3: all this. This is too much. All I'm gonna say

1032
00:49:45,560 --> 00:49:49,560
Speaker 3: is what I wanted to clearly articulate, and that was,

1033
00:49:50,080 --> 00:49:54,399
Speaker 3: like I said, black community, black love, black comunity, and

1034
00:49:55,239 --> 00:49:58,600
Speaker 3: detail these, like I said, shared experiences across the diaspora

1035
00:49:58,680 --> 00:50:01,840
Speaker 3: that we can't control our grandmother are very similar. So

1036
00:50:01,920 --> 00:50:02,960
Speaker 3: I wanted to detail that.

1037
00:50:03,080 --> 00:50:04,839
Speaker 2: Sometimes you just got to tell people it's a black thing.

1038
00:50:04,880 --> 00:50:07,920
Speaker 2: You wouldn't understand, you wouldn't care what. They don't need

1039
00:50:07,960 --> 00:50:08,839
Speaker 2: an explanation, they.

1040
00:50:08,760 --> 00:50:10,799
Speaker 3: Don't need no expl and it should be actually should

1041
00:50:10,840 --> 00:50:12,800
Speaker 3: be gay kept. I think a lot of our cultures

1042
00:50:12,800 --> 00:50:16,520
Speaker 3: should be kept close to us because you know, white

1043
00:50:16,520 --> 00:50:18,480
Speaker 3: people that keep whatever they want to keep close to

1044
00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:20,560
Speaker 3: them is kept very close to them. There's a lot

1045
00:50:20,600 --> 00:50:22,520
Speaker 3: of shit that's kept away from us. And I feel

1046
00:50:22,520 --> 00:50:24,680
Speaker 3: like we should have the same pride and integrity about

1047
00:50:24,680 --> 00:50:27,319
Speaker 3: our culture. And it's not about being exclusionary. Is just

1048
00:50:27,880 --> 00:50:30,759
Speaker 3: showcasing a level of pride and reverence and respect for

1049
00:50:31,000 --> 00:50:33,400
Speaker 3: what's been put in place historically.

1050
00:50:33,560 --> 00:50:35,799
Speaker 5: You are twenty four years old. You are so.

1051
00:50:37,320 --> 00:50:41,839
Speaker 4: Like just intelligent, brilliant, educating your informative.

1052
00:50:41,320 --> 00:50:44,440
Speaker 1: You know, sound like white people. White sound like white people.

1053
00:50:44,840 --> 00:50:46,040
Speaker 3: They like white people.

1054
00:50:46,120 --> 00:50:48,360
Speaker 1: You sound like white people saying that white people.

1055
00:50:48,480 --> 00:50:49,200
Speaker 6: What are you talking about?

1056
00:50:49,360 --> 00:50:50,840
Speaker 3: Because I'm giving another young.

1057
00:50:50,640 --> 00:50:53,520
Speaker 2: Black woman sometimes I'd like that don't mean she white,

1058
00:50:53,520 --> 00:50:55,920
Speaker 2: but that means you're just an intelligent black woman, like

1059
00:50:56,360 --> 00:50:57,680
Speaker 2: you don't want to white?

1060
00:50:58,880 --> 00:51:00,799
Speaker 3: That make you said that? Are we tell like they

1061
00:51:00,840 --> 00:51:01,480
Speaker 3: sound like white people?

1062
00:51:01,520 --> 00:51:02,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't like that.

1063
00:51:02,560 --> 00:51:05,200
Speaker 2: No, no, no, I said, said that she'd be sounding

1064
00:51:05,280 --> 00:51:06,840
Speaker 2: like white people using big words.

1065
00:51:07,760 --> 00:51:09,319
Speaker 6: You just used a couple of words that I didn't

1066
00:51:09,320 --> 00:51:09,520
Speaker 6: even know.

1067
00:51:09,960 --> 00:51:11,600
Speaker 1: Like that don't mean you white. That does mean she's

1068
00:51:11,840 --> 00:51:12,359
Speaker 1: No no no.

1069
00:51:12,640 --> 00:51:15,000
Speaker 4: Before said that he can say whatever you want to

1070
00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:18,160
Speaker 4: say about his wife because and you say.

1071
00:51:17,960 --> 00:51:18,759
Speaker 1: Because you look at you.

1072
00:51:18,960 --> 00:51:20,360
Speaker 2: Why you know why because you looked at her and

1073
00:51:20,400 --> 00:51:22,360
Speaker 2: you said, wow, you're twenty four years old, and you

1074
00:51:22,400 --> 00:51:23,320
Speaker 2: sound so intelligent.

1075
00:51:23,400 --> 00:51:26,839
Speaker 1: I wanted, no, I did, no, I didn't.

1076
00:51:28,560 --> 00:51:30,680
Speaker 3: Sound of course, I.

1077
00:51:32,640 --> 00:51:35,399
Speaker 4: Did not say she said please. I did not say

1078
00:51:35,440 --> 00:51:39,439
Speaker 4: she sound so intelligent. I said, you're twenty four years old.

1079
00:51:39,760 --> 00:51:43,600
Speaker 4: You are so intelligent. You're informative, you're educating your like.

1080
00:51:46,239 --> 00:51:49,200
Speaker 7: I did not say that she means but I don't

1081
00:51:49,200 --> 00:51:54,680
Speaker 7: think she means what you mean that she's gone white. Yeah,

1082
00:51:54,719 --> 00:51:57,080
Speaker 7: she's talking about age and the maturity level when you

1083
00:51:57,200 --> 00:51:58,239
Speaker 7: when you when speaking to.

1084
00:51:58,200 --> 00:51:59,759
Speaker 3: Her in a comprehension story.

1085
00:51:59,840 --> 00:52:02,799
Speaker 2: Some already told me the other day when Little John

1086
00:52:02,880 --> 00:52:05,200
Speaker 2: was on Your Apprentice, and Donald Trump used to say,

1087
00:52:05,200 --> 00:52:08,280
Speaker 2: come look at little John talk. Y'all got to hear John,

1088
00:52:08,360 --> 00:52:11,320
Speaker 2: he's so intelligent. Oh my god, because you got.

1089
00:52:11,120 --> 00:52:14,560
Speaker 1: The dreads right and the gold grill. You know what

1090
00:52:14,560 --> 00:52:14,919
Speaker 1: I mean.

1091
00:52:15,000 --> 00:52:15,800
Speaker 5: I don't think she meant that.

1092
00:52:16,239 --> 00:52:17,839
Speaker 3: I hear what you're saying. If what was coming from

1093
00:52:18,040 --> 00:52:20,880
Speaker 3: if it was coming I would be like what you

1094
00:52:20,960 --> 00:52:24,200
Speaker 3: mean by that? But I understand exactly what you mean

1095
00:52:24,440 --> 00:52:28,440
Speaker 3: because I think, like just especially with the rhetoric with

1096
00:52:28,480 --> 00:52:31,239
Speaker 3: the ship that's being pushed on us right now, I

1097
00:52:31,239 --> 00:52:34,279
Speaker 3: think I get what you mean, like to bring light

1098
00:52:34,360 --> 00:52:38,799
Speaker 3: to these subjects and you know, explain some of these

1099
00:52:38,800 --> 00:52:41,680
Speaker 3: topics that we don't really talk about in our generation.

1100
00:52:41,840 --> 00:52:43,960
Speaker 4: We don't talk about it. We don't hear about it

1101
00:52:44,000 --> 00:52:47,200
Speaker 4: from young people enough. You know, Like there's three lesson

1102
00:52:47,239 --> 00:52:48,960
Speaker 4: you just gave us on that flag. You know what

1103
00:52:49,000 --> 00:52:52,600
Speaker 4: I mean that you you intentionally put in your video. Yeah,

1104
00:52:52,680 --> 00:52:54,560
Speaker 4: that's you know what I'm saying, Like all of that

1105
00:52:54,640 --> 00:52:56,799
Speaker 4: and then everything that you've been through, you could have

1106
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:57,759
Speaker 4: went a whole other way.

1107
00:52:57,840 --> 00:52:58,600
Speaker 5: You could have you know what.

1108
00:52:58,600 --> 00:53:01,400
Speaker 3: I'm saying, Like, Yeah, for sure, I go around people

1109
00:53:02,160 --> 00:53:05,560
Speaker 3: and it's so crazy to see the difference in how

1110
00:53:06,160 --> 00:53:08,960
Speaker 3: trauma has affected us. And I don't fallot anybody for

1111
00:53:09,040 --> 00:53:11,759
Speaker 3: the path that they chose, because you really never I

1112
00:53:11,800 --> 00:53:16,120
Speaker 3: feel blessed. I don't know what it was that steered

1113
00:53:16,120 --> 00:53:19,279
Speaker 3: me this way, because I could have been I could

1114
00:53:19,320 --> 00:53:21,719
Speaker 3: have done anything in this life. Because I grew up

1115
00:53:21,719 --> 00:53:23,880
Speaker 3: with people and we all grew up, we started at

1116
00:53:23,920 --> 00:53:25,839
Speaker 3: the same point, we experienced some of the same things.

1117
00:53:25,840 --> 00:53:27,799
Speaker 3: Some of the people that I was hospitalized with we

1118
00:53:27,840 --> 00:53:30,600
Speaker 3: shared some of the same experiences, and we've all kind

1119
00:53:30,640 --> 00:53:35,240
Speaker 3: of taken different paths, but we still stay closely connected.

1120
00:53:35,280 --> 00:53:37,439
Speaker 3: But it's like, this is why I advocate the way

1121
00:53:37,440 --> 00:53:42,440
Speaker 3: that I do, because I think people misunderstand my upbringing

1122
00:53:42,560 --> 00:53:45,080
Speaker 3: or they see me or just like or they see

1123
00:53:45,120 --> 00:53:48,440
Speaker 3: somebody who's poised and put together and they think or

1124
00:53:48,560 --> 00:53:50,920
Speaker 3: well spoken, articulate, and they're like, oh my gosh, she's

1125
00:53:50,960 --> 00:53:53,799
Speaker 3: so like, you know, they have no idea the things

1126
00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:55,680
Speaker 3: that I've seen, the things I've witness, things that I've.

1127
00:53:55,520 --> 00:53:58,800
Speaker 4: Experienced, and I admire it. It's inspirational.

1128
00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:00,479
Speaker 5: Like so, yeah, it's.

1129
00:54:00,440 --> 00:54:03,279
Speaker 2: Definitely glad you answered your call. Is that don hu

1130
00:54:03,360 --> 00:54:05,640
Speaker 2: Leo record? Is that really about stunning for Vegas.

1131
00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:08,640
Speaker 5: Answering the phone, Yes, it was why you ain't answer

1132
00:54:08,680 --> 00:54:09,080
Speaker 5: the phone?

1133
00:54:09,280 --> 00:54:11,040
Speaker 1: Why you didn't answer the call? Made a good song,

1134
00:54:11,160 --> 00:54:12,640
Speaker 1: blessing on your line. You ain't pick up?

1135
00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:13,560
Speaker 3: Get him?

1136
00:54:13,920 --> 00:54:14,759
Speaker 6: I caught her back.

1137
00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:18,520
Speaker 3: He called me back halfway through the song, and I

1138
00:54:18,560 --> 00:54:19,479
Speaker 3: was did.

1139
00:54:19,480 --> 00:54:23,200
Speaker 6: Know ship like not even just made the song. She

1140
00:54:23,320 --> 00:54:24,760
Speaker 6: just saidn't have said that in the interview.

1141
00:54:24,960 --> 00:54:27,760
Speaker 3: I shouldn't have, But I was being honest though, because

1142
00:54:27,800 --> 00:54:31,279
Speaker 3: everybody's like, when you lie, you gotta keep up with

1143
00:54:31,360 --> 00:54:33,560
Speaker 3: the lie. So I feel like the first time somebody

1144
00:54:33,600 --> 00:54:37,239
Speaker 3: asked me what was the origin of the song, I

1145
00:54:37,280 --> 00:54:39,360
Speaker 3: was just like, oh, yeah, this is what happened because

1146
00:54:39,360 --> 00:54:43,200
Speaker 3: it was just like the most readily available answer that

1147
00:54:43,239 --> 00:54:45,120
Speaker 3: I had, which was the truth. Maybe I probably shouldn't

1148
00:54:45,120 --> 00:54:46,799
Speaker 3: have said that, but it was true and me he

1149
00:54:46,840 --> 00:54:48,440
Speaker 3: called me back halfway through the song, but I was

1150
00:54:48,440 --> 00:54:51,760
Speaker 3: already deep. I was like, I was already I was vibing.

1151
00:54:51,800 --> 00:54:53,399
Speaker 3: I was loving a song. I knew it wasn't here.

1152
00:54:53,480 --> 00:54:54,560
Speaker 6: There was no point.

1153
00:54:55,840 --> 00:54:57,520
Speaker 3: I shouldn't have said that. You do why you answer?

1154
00:54:58,000 --> 00:55:02,000
Speaker 3: We shooting a video? Oh, I mean it happens every

1155
00:55:02,040 --> 00:55:02,960
Speaker 3: now and then.

1156
00:55:03,239 --> 00:55:05,480
Speaker 2: You know, she said, she's looking at you designed that

1157
00:55:05,520 --> 00:55:06,920
Speaker 2: was his story. He better stick to it.

1158
00:55:07,239 --> 00:55:10,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, No, I was really I was calling him and

1159
00:55:10,080 --> 00:55:11,000
Speaker 3: I was like, why is he not?

1160
00:55:11,040 --> 00:55:13,840
Speaker 6: I don't be doing no sucker ship, bro? Why I

1161
00:55:13,920 --> 00:55:16,520
Speaker 6: don't even like when like a normal person walk up

1162
00:55:16,560 --> 00:55:19,520
Speaker 6: to us and joke about that song, I'll be ready

1163
00:55:19,520 --> 00:55:21,320
Speaker 6: to be like, bro, I'll slap the shit out of you.

1164
00:55:21,400 --> 00:55:22,879
Speaker 3: Right, I shouldn't say that.

1165
00:55:23,000 --> 00:55:25,680
Speaker 6: Hopefully it's not nobody with me for little brother to

1166
00:55:25,719 --> 00:55:29,720
Speaker 6: be like, bro, we'll slap the shit out of you. Career,

1167
00:55:29,760 --> 00:55:31,279
Speaker 6: I don't know. I don't even play.

1168
00:55:31,080 --> 00:55:33,960
Speaker 3: Like, Yeah, his bros is crazy.

1169
00:55:34,920 --> 00:55:37,040
Speaker 7: My best friend sent me that song. That's this is how.

1170
00:55:37,400 --> 00:55:38,920
Speaker 7: My best friend sent me that song and it was like,

1171
00:55:38,960 --> 00:55:41,279
Speaker 7: this is you. Y'all are spirit animals. I was like,

1172
00:55:41,760 --> 00:55:45,120
Speaker 7: which was flying? I'm a sad scorpio cuss? Okay, yeah,

1173
00:55:45,120 --> 00:55:47,720
Speaker 7: when your birthday November twenty second? Oh fire, my granny's

1174
00:55:47,719 --> 00:55:50,600
Speaker 7: birthday November twenty third. Oh So she she's fun, but

1175
00:55:50,680 --> 00:55:52,520
Speaker 7: she's fun. Yeah, she's crazy.

1176
00:55:53,400 --> 00:55:56,160
Speaker 5: How did the link up with Lizzo happened?

1177
00:55:56,680 --> 00:55:59,920
Speaker 3: So she's from Houston. So she reached out to me

1178
00:56:00,040 --> 00:56:02,279
Speaker 3: and she was like, hey, you know I gotta do

1179
00:56:02,680 --> 00:56:04,600
Speaker 3: you have any anything you want me to get on.

1180
00:56:05,040 --> 00:56:07,120
Speaker 3: And I didn't have anything at the time, and I

1181
00:56:07,160 --> 00:56:08,960
Speaker 3: was like, I'm recording this week, I'm recording all week.

1182
00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:11,279
Speaker 3: If I find something, I'll send it to you. And

1183
00:56:11,320 --> 00:56:13,040
Speaker 3: I send it to her. She sent it right back

1184
00:56:13,840 --> 00:56:16,080
Speaker 3: the same day. She sent it back the same day,

1185
00:56:16,120 --> 00:56:18,960
Speaker 3: which is very rare in this industry. I'm saying that

1186
00:56:18,960 --> 00:56:20,640
Speaker 3: because I don't even be sending it back the same

1187
00:56:20,719 --> 00:56:22,680
Speaker 3: day because I be needing to sit with stuff, or

1188
00:56:22,719 --> 00:56:24,120
Speaker 3: I be needing to get to the studio. Maybe I

1189
00:56:24,120 --> 00:56:26,160
Speaker 3: don't got a studio planned for another two weeks. Like

1190
00:56:27,280 --> 00:56:29,640
Speaker 3: it just worked out that way. So I'm very appreciative

1191
00:56:29,640 --> 00:56:31,719
Speaker 3: that she sent me that burst back so quick. I

1192
00:56:31,760 --> 00:56:37,040
Speaker 3: never experienced nothing like, especially from us, a star like Lizo,

1193
00:56:37,160 --> 00:56:39,439
Speaker 3: like somebody who is so accomplished like her. I would

1194
00:56:39,440 --> 00:56:41,160
Speaker 3: have thought that she would have gave me to run around.

1195
00:56:41,160 --> 00:56:43,080
Speaker 3: But she was really adamant about doing the song because

1196
00:56:43,080 --> 00:56:45,400
Speaker 3: she was kind of like she's entering this rap phase

1197
00:56:45,480 --> 00:56:46,920
Speaker 3: and I'm just happy to facilitate.

1198
00:56:47,120 --> 00:56:48,240
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's dope.

1199
00:56:48,840 --> 00:56:51,279
Speaker 1: It is true. You you, you and the baby back good.

1200
00:56:52,960 --> 00:56:57,440
Speaker 6: We we speak, we speak, I mean we speak.

1201
00:57:00,080 --> 00:57:01,799
Speaker 1: Had you facilitated that combo? Was that true.

1202
00:57:03,600 --> 00:57:06,800
Speaker 3: I didn't facilitate that Conbo. I don't know him personally,

1203
00:57:06,880 --> 00:57:07,720
Speaker 3: but it was like.

1204
00:57:07,760 --> 00:57:10,960
Speaker 6: I facilitated that Combo. I was on tour with talking

1205
00:57:10,960 --> 00:57:13,839
Speaker 6: to you and he told you like that, let's just reached.

1206
00:57:13,920 --> 00:57:15,719
Speaker 6: That's how we seen. I've seen it up there. Like

1207
00:57:16,080 --> 00:57:17,720
Speaker 6: even when I reached out to him, I was reaching

1208
00:57:17,720 --> 00:57:20,640
Speaker 6: out to him on some grown man ship, like I'm

1209
00:57:20,640 --> 00:57:23,040
Speaker 6: gonna take my lick, like I was the reason why

1210
00:57:23,080 --> 00:57:26,440
Speaker 6: we separated because it was a ship going on outside

1211
00:57:26,600 --> 00:57:32,280
Speaker 6: the business. So I moved around and when I hit

1212
00:57:32,360 --> 00:57:36,000
Speaker 6: him up, I probably moved around before I hit him up.

1213
00:57:36,000 --> 00:57:38,800
Speaker 6: I moved around with animosity on my chest. So when

1214
00:57:38,800 --> 00:57:40,280
Speaker 6: I hit him up, it was more so like not

1215
00:57:40,280 --> 00:57:42,680
Speaker 6: getting it off. But it was definitely like, man bro,

1216
00:57:42,680 --> 00:57:47,320
Speaker 6: I'm gonna take accountability. Like I went left. I should

1217
00:57:47,360 --> 00:57:50,360
Speaker 6: have came and spoke to you about certain ship. There

1218
00:57:50,440 --> 00:57:54,360
Speaker 6: was nothing like, man bro, you like I want to

1219
00:57:54,360 --> 00:57:56,360
Speaker 6: get back to that, Like this is the only dudo

1220
00:57:56,480 --> 00:58:00,320
Speaker 6: I'm worried about. So like when I reached out to

1221
00:58:00,400 --> 00:58:02,439
Speaker 6: him on some real ship, it's like, well, I really

1222
00:58:02,440 --> 00:58:05,960
Speaker 6: do miss my brother me. That's all it was. It

1223
00:58:06,080 --> 00:58:08,040
Speaker 6: wasn't nothing, It wasn't about no I needed a song.

1224
00:58:08,480 --> 00:58:10,800
Speaker 6: I'm trying to get back right there with none of that,

1225
00:58:11,120 --> 00:58:14,919
Speaker 6: Like I missed my brother. We're not been through enough,

1226
00:58:14,960 --> 00:58:20,080
Speaker 6: Like it wasn't just straight music ship. I'm like, man,

1227
00:58:20,080 --> 00:58:23,560
Speaker 6: how the hell shout? It adin't hit me up yet. Yeah,

1228
00:58:24,000 --> 00:58:25,920
Speaker 6: but we did end up speaking one out. We was

1229
00:58:25,920 --> 00:58:28,200
Speaker 6: on tour. That's how it kind of happened because I

1230
00:58:28,480 --> 00:58:30,480
Speaker 6: was on tour with my wife. She was on tour

1231
00:58:30,600 --> 00:58:33,720
Speaker 6: Don Tolliver. I was playing around. I got into it

1232
00:58:33,840 --> 00:58:37,600
Speaker 6: like Rick on Don Tolliver bike and like messed up,

1233
00:58:37,640 --> 00:58:39,840
Speaker 6: like faction, every bone in my face and stuff like that.

1234
00:58:40,440 --> 00:58:42,760
Speaker 6: And then when Leo posted about it, like basically letting

1235
00:58:42,760 --> 00:58:46,560
Speaker 6: it be known that I'm straight, probably like a day later,

1236
00:58:46,600 --> 00:58:50,880
Speaker 6: he reached out to me, responding back to the DM

1237
00:58:51,120 --> 00:58:54,840
Speaker 6: that he told you all about. So I had hit

1238
00:58:54,920 --> 00:58:57,400
Speaker 6: him before you fear me, before he came up here

1239
00:58:57,400 --> 00:59:00,120
Speaker 6: and told y'all, and he still didn't even reached that

1240
00:59:00,360 --> 00:59:03,120
Speaker 6: like whatever he said he told y'all like, oh, it's good.

1241
00:59:03,480 --> 00:59:06,720
Speaker 6: But even then, I know bro, like I really know him,

1242
00:59:06,720 --> 00:59:11,240
Speaker 6: so I'm like shit. However, when I sent the message

1243
00:59:11,240 --> 00:59:13,160
Speaker 6: to him, I'm like, however he reacts, I'm not tripping

1244
00:59:13,240 --> 00:59:17,040
Speaker 6: because I'm taking accountability for even letting this shit get

1245
00:59:17,120 --> 00:59:21,360
Speaker 6: this distant. God moved around without saying anything. I moved

1246
00:59:21,400 --> 00:59:23,680
Speaker 6: around without saying like, oh this is going on, or

1247
00:59:23,720 --> 00:59:27,400
Speaker 6: somebody saying there somebody telling who, I just moved around.

1248
00:59:29,200 --> 00:59:31,800
Speaker 6: But even then, because I ain't got nothing against bro

1249
00:59:32,760 --> 00:59:35,760
Speaker 6: loving to death, like, I look at it like when

1250
00:59:35,800 --> 00:59:37,480
Speaker 6: I moved around, like that's what I was supposed to

1251
00:59:37,480 --> 00:59:39,920
Speaker 6: do on God, that what I was supposed to do, Bro,

1252
00:59:40,080 --> 00:59:42,800
Speaker 6: Because that's just what I was supposed to do.

1253
00:59:43,080 --> 00:59:44,600
Speaker 2: What was the issue though, because it's not like you

1254
00:59:44,600 --> 00:59:47,880
Speaker 2: didn't have your own identity even being with the baby,

1255
00:59:47,920 --> 00:59:49,520
Speaker 2: like people knew who stunner forward was.

1256
00:59:49,760 --> 00:59:54,440
Speaker 1: You was on your own trajectory. You didn't feel like.

1257
00:59:54,440 --> 00:59:59,840
Speaker 6: That, Yeah, that's what it felt like, though they might

1258
00:59:59,840 --> 01:00:03,960
Speaker 6: not have been at That's what it felt like though,

1259
01:00:04,000 --> 01:00:05,440
Speaker 6: And that ain't got nothing to do with him, you

1260
01:00:05,480 --> 01:00:08,800
Speaker 6: feel me, We was bruh. It was just that shit

1261
01:00:08,880 --> 01:00:10,880
Speaker 6: happened too quick that I can really say that's his

1262
01:00:10,960 --> 01:00:14,120
Speaker 6: my career, like I can say it happened so quick

1263
01:00:14,200 --> 01:00:18,120
Speaker 6: that it was probably too much for everybody and not

1264
01:00:18,240 --> 01:00:19,720
Speaker 6: just me. But at first I used to look at

1265
01:00:19,760 --> 01:00:21,600
Speaker 6: it like, man, that shit was too much for me, bro,

1266
01:00:21,720 --> 01:00:24,440
Speaker 6: Like before that, I was in a two bedroom apartment

1267
01:00:24,520 --> 01:00:26,760
Speaker 6: that was getting shot up. My mama was at that,

1268
01:00:27,680 --> 01:00:30,840
Speaker 6: like seven niggas in there, my sisters in there, still

1269
01:00:31,000 --> 01:00:34,200
Speaker 6: still going to school every day or whatever. Like uh,

1270
01:00:37,040 --> 01:00:38,640
Speaker 6: I looked at it like it was just too much

1271
01:00:38,640 --> 01:00:42,760
Speaker 6: for everybody from me bruh in the scope and everybody.

1272
01:00:42,800 --> 01:00:46,240
Speaker 6: You feel me, you feel me because I did my part,

1273
01:00:46,400 --> 01:00:49,640
Speaker 6: Like I ain't never end up how any of my

1274
01:00:49,760 --> 01:00:52,200
Speaker 6: peers ended up. That we was doing the same thing

1275
01:00:52,680 --> 01:00:54,840
Speaker 6: on and off Instagram. We was doing the same exact thing.

1276
01:00:54,880 --> 01:00:58,120
Speaker 6: I ain't end up like nobody else. I ain't never

1277
01:00:58,160 --> 01:01:05,960
Speaker 6: get one of my close partners indicted. You feel me killed?

1278
01:01:06,000 --> 01:01:08,240
Speaker 6: Nothing I ain't do. I feel like I felt like

1279
01:01:08,240 --> 01:01:10,240
Speaker 6: the only thing I did wrong was just funck off

1280
01:01:10,280 --> 01:01:13,920
Speaker 6: money because I'm a genuine guy at heart already with

1281
01:01:14,040 --> 01:01:19,040
Speaker 6: anybody I come across, like the bus driver, the janitor,

1282
01:01:19,080 --> 01:01:24,240
Speaker 6: the president, and everybody got like, no big use, no whatever.

1283
01:01:24,560 --> 01:01:29,240
Speaker 6: So I'm like, man, it was just too much, bro,

1284
01:01:29,400 --> 01:01:32,760
Speaker 6: it was just too much for everybody. Like because like

1285
01:01:32,800 --> 01:01:34,400
Speaker 6: I said, it can feel or it can even look

1286
01:01:34,520 --> 01:01:39,760
Speaker 6: like something to y'all, but over here it's something totally different.

1287
01:01:40,040 --> 01:01:43,240
Speaker 6: Like I was really surviving my whole time over there,

1288
01:01:43,640 --> 01:01:46,120
Speaker 6: not even just with being all the baby like within

1289
01:01:46,240 --> 01:01:51,600
Speaker 6: the scope being our help. I was surviving. I wasn't

1290
01:01:52,200 --> 01:01:54,000
Speaker 6: I feel me. I wasn't top of the line like

1291
01:01:54,320 --> 01:01:56,560
Speaker 6: everybody thought it what brother's top of the line, for sure?

1292
01:01:57,040 --> 01:01:58,880
Speaker 6: With me, I was like surviving. I was trying to

1293
01:01:58,920 --> 01:02:02,000
Speaker 6: get through there. I was trying to I'm paying lawyer fees.

1294
01:02:02,840 --> 01:02:07,160
Speaker 6: I'm doing like everything that artists do around my age,

1295
01:02:07,520 --> 01:02:11,360
Speaker 6: like thinking that we've grown already, are like, oh yeah,

1296
01:02:11,320 --> 01:02:13,080
Speaker 6: I'm a man, Like I'm out here. You feel me?

1297
01:02:13,480 --> 01:02:15,160
Speaker 6: So like I say, I can say yeah, it felt

1298
01:02:15,160 --> 01:02:18,160
Speaker 6: like that or even looked like that. But now I'm

1299
01:02:18,200 --> 01:02:20,200
Speaker 6: twenty nine years old and I can look back on shit,

1300
01:02:20,480 --> 01:02:24,960
Speaker 6: wake up every day with my wife, breakfast, lunch, dinner,

1301
01:02:25,360 --> 01:02:27,840
Speaker 6: feel me, wake up with my son, go to the

1302
01:02:27,840 --> 01:02:30,000
Speaker 6: studio when I want to, Like, I see this shit

1303
01:02:30,840 --> 01:02:32,720
Speaker 6: for what it really is. So I know when a

1304
01:02:32,760 --> 01:02:35,040
Speaker 6: nigga get on that bit talking about like man, I

1305
01:02:35,040 --> 01:02:37,320
Speaker 6: gotta take this risk for the family, gotta get away

1306
01:02:37,360 --> 01:02:40,560
Speaker 6: from that shit, be cap that shit, be total cap

1307
01:02:41,240 --> 01:02:47,280
Speaker 6: because I know, like even now I'm bigger than I

1308
01:02:47,320 --> 01:02:51,560
Speaker 6: was before. Bro, I just was like streaming music, and

1309
01:02:51,600 --> 01:02:54,800
Speaker 6: it was dropping so much. I was dropping it through

1310
01:02:54,840 --> 01:02:57,720
Speaker 6: a company or whatever versus, Like now that's what I'm

1311
01:02:57,720 --> 01:02:59,880
Speaker 6: getting back to doing. But my music is better than

1312
01:02:59,880 --> 01:03:03,080
Speaker 6: this being. I'm really like genuinely happy. I really feel like.

1313
01:03:03,960 --> 01:03:05,600
Speaker 6: I was talking to young Thug the other day, was like,

1314
01:03:05,640 --> 01:03:08,000
Speaker 6: how'd you for? Real? Bro? How'd you for I said,

1315
01:03:08,000 --> 01:03:09,920
Speaker 6: I'm better than I ever been, Like, I ain't just

1316
01:03:09,920 --> 01:03:11,959
Speaker 6: saying that to you either. I'm better than I ever

1317
01:03:12,040 --> 01:03:14,760
Speaker 6: been before I got some money. When I got some money,

1318
01:03:15,600 --> 01:03:18,200
Speaker 6: like everything, bro, I look at it like a lessen

1319
01:03:18,280 --> 01:03:21,360
Speaker 6: and not a loss. So I just say it was

1320
01:03:21,400 --> 01:03:24,440
Speaker 6: just too much for everybody, but it was supposed to

1321
01:03:24,440 --> 01:03:27,480
Speaker 6: happen it. It put me in position to be here today.

1322
01:03:28,120 --> 01:03:31,840
Speaker 6: Feed me. It put me in position to learn, like

1323
01:03:33,040 --> 01:03:34,920
Speaker 6: about a lot of stuff that a lot of guys

1324
01:03:35,160 --> 01:03:37,480
Speaker 6: can't come in that bit with the biggest rapper at

1325
01:03:37,560 --> 01:03:39,600
Speaker 6: the time, Like I'm coming through here with the baby.

1326
01:03:39,680 --> 01:03:41,840
Speaker 6: So I'm gonna meet Drake, I'm gonna meet Gucci, I'm

1327
01:03:41,840 --> 01:03:44,640
Speaker 6: gonna meet every rapper. I'm gonna watch this rapper do

1328
01:03:44,800 --> 01:03:46,760
Speaker 6: lame shit that I used to look up to. I'm

1329
01:03:46,760 --> 01:03:49,240
Speaker 6: gonna watch I'm gonna see all of it. Feel me.

1330
01:03:49,280 --> 01:03:52,840
Speaker 6: And then when I finally get to that moment with myself,

1331
01:03:52,840 --> 01:03:56,120
Speaker 6: while I'm like, man, why ain't you take this nigga back?

1332
01:03:56,280 --> 01:03:58,240
Speaker 6: Why don't following this nigga? What am I doing?

1333
01:03:58,320 --> 01:03:58,520
Speaker 1: Like this?

1334
01:03:58,600 --> 01:04:01,680
Speaker 6: Ain't me? I get to break down all that shit

1335
01:04:01,720 --> 01:04:04,480
Speaker 6: that I've seen from everything, and and then I just

1336
01:04:04,520 --> 01:04:06,600
Speaker 6: tell myself like it was supposed to happen like that

1337
01:04:07,040 --> 01:04:09,320
Speaker 6: versus before my wife came around too. I was definitely

1338
01:04:09,320 --> 01:04:14,920
Speaker 6: telling myself that I'm about to mood to Houston, about

1339
01:04:14,920 --> 01:04:16,560
Speaker 6: the mood of Houston. I'm about to run up some baby.

1340
01:04:16,640 --> 01:04:18,160
Speaker 6: Feel I'm about to woo. I'm about to take a

1341
01:04:18,160 --> 01:04:21,040
Speaker 6: break from North Carolina before I go to jail or

1342
01:04:21,080 --> 01:04:23,440
Speaker 6: do something wrong. Feel me, I'm about to mood to Houston,

1343
01:04:23,480 --> 01:04:27,040
Speaker 6: about to woo woo. And then when I meet her,

1344
01:04:27,560 --> 01:04:29,680
Speaker 6: I did them just start telling myself like I did

1345
01:04:29,720 --> 01:04:33,480
Speaker 6: my first on the radar. I did that first interview.

1346
01:04:33,480 --> 01:04:36,040
Speaker 6: I told him in an interview, I was like, I'm

1347
01:04:36,040 --> 01:04:39,480
Speaker 6: done rapping. And from there, from there, when I said

1348
01:04:39,480 --> 01:04:41,240
Speaker 6: that out loud, like I'm done rapping, I ain't do

1349
01:04:41,320 --> 01:04:43,920
Speaker 6: no freestyle on the radar. From there, that's when everybody

1350
01:04:44,000 --> 01:04:45,920
Speaker 6: come up with the narrative, Oh baby did this he

1351
01:04:46,000 --> 01:04:48,520
Speaker 6: dropped and me dad da da, He's gonna fell out.

1352
01:04:49,080 --> 01:04:52,200
Speaker 6: But I really literally like what's that on the radar?

1353
01:04:53,400 --> 01:04:55,480
Speaker 6: Like just burnt. You can go look at the interview

1354
01:04:55,560 --> 01:04:57,800
Speaker 6: right now, like look at my face and you can tell, like, bro,

1355
01:04:57,880 --> 01:05:00,280
Speaker 6: that nigga did not want to do this. I was

1356
01:05:00,280 --> 01:05:02,680
Speaker 6: sober in that interview, but I was just like and

1357
01:05:02,760 --> 01:05:05,880
Speaker 6: this shit, like everything about it is not what I expected,

1358
01:05:06,040 --> 01:05:07,840
Speaker 6: like feel me.

1359
01:05:07,840 --> 01:05:09,280
Speaker 1: But it's the industry in general.

1360
01:05:09,480 --> 01:05:11,640
Speaker 6: Yeah yeah at the time. But like I say, all

1361
01:05:11,640 --> 01:05:13,720
Speaker 6: that supposed to happen, bro, Like I was supposed to

1362
01:05:13,760 --> 01:05:16,000
Speaker 6: watch the industry go through the ups and downs that

1363
01:05:16,000 --> 01:05:18,160
Speaker 6: it went through as an industry alone, because I used

1364
01:05:18,200 --> 01:05:21,200
Speaker 6: to look at it like is it me going through

1365
01:05:21,200 --> 01:05:23,120
Speaker 6: the ups and downs? And I don't know. I'm a

1366
01:05:23,160 --> 01:05:25,520
Speaker 6: good I'm a good dude, like, but I'm watching fuck

1367
01:05:25,600 --> 01:05:30,200
Speaker 6: niggas go straight ups every time, so I'm.

1368
01:05:30,000 --> 01:05:30,520
Speaker 1: Like, is it me?

1369
01:05:30,680 --> 01:05:33,240
Speaker 6: But I'm also watching like as a year ago about

1370
01:05:33,320 --> 01:05:35,360
Speaker 6: another year ago. But I'm like, it's really the industry

1371
01:05:35,360 --> 01:05:37,240
Speaker 6: because you can see I don't want to use no names,

1372
01:05:37,280 --> 01:05:41,000
Speaker 6: but you know, shit like did they me and Leo

1373
01:05:41,120 --> 01:05:44,320
Speaker 6: got married? Our name was besides whoever y'all wanted to

1374
01:05:44,360 --> 01:05:46,600
Speaker 6: say it was, but a week before that, the narrative

1375
01:05:46,760 --> 01:05:51,800
Speaker 6: was that maybe I'll fell off for maybe whatever it was,

1376
01:05:51,840 --> 01:05:53,919
Speaker 6: Maybe I'm around my wife because of what she got

1377
01:05:53,920 --> 01:05:56,040
Speaker 6: going on, whatever it was, you feel me. They had

1378
01:05:56,200 --> 01:05:59,440
Speaker 6: every narrative that they wanted to put out there until

1379
01:05:59,440 --> 01:06:02,560
Speaker 6: we just like I say, put it on the internet

1380
01:06:02,760 --> 01:06:06,720
Speaker 6: like this is the narrative, like or people seeing me

1381
01:06:06,800 --> 01:06:10,760
Speaker 6: cry and ship like that. I thought, like, in reality,

1382
01:06:11,920 --> 01:06:15,160
Speaker 6: I'm not tripping about that shit. Or when my wife said,

1383
01:06:15,160 --> 01:06:16,720
Speaker 6: what we're gonna do the ceremony because I'm like, shit,

1384
01:06:16,720 --> 01:06:19,560
Speaker 6: you supposed to cry. I cried for a nigga that

1385
01:06:19,640 --> 01:06:21,680
Speaker 6: died game. You think I'm not about to cry for

1386
01:06:22,040 --> 01:06:23,720
Speaker 6: my wife? Right? You feel me?

1387
01:06:24,080 --> 01:06:24,360
Speaker 3: Right?

1388
01:06:24,520 --> 01:06:26,560
Speaker 6: Yes, you feel me like I feel the same way

1389
01:06:26,600 --> 01:06:29,720
Speaker 6: about Like they'd be like, oh a nigga, you tender

1390
01:06:29,880 --> 01:06:32,080
Speaker 6: if you I'll be like, I'm right I am. I'm

1391
01:06:32,080 --> 01:06:33,720
Speaker 6: gonna be the first one to tell you straight up

1392
01:06:33,760 --> 01:06:37,960
Speaker 6: I am like and even if she she wouldn't do that,

1393
01:06:38,040 --> 01:06:40,439
Speaker 6: but it don't matter. I'm tender. You feel me because

1394
01:06:40,440 --> 01:06:42,280
Speaker 6: of the same way you play with my homeboy. I

1395
01:06:42,280 --> 01:06:45,080
Speaker 6: know how much react he damn a rat. You play

1396
01:06:45,120 --> 01:06:47,080
Speaker 6: with my son. Mama absolutely.

1397
01:06:48,080 --> 01:06:48,440
Speaker 1: Feel me.

1398
01:06:48,600 --> 01:06:50,640
Speaker 2: And also because of the trauma we've been through, we

1399
01:06:50,680 --> 01:06:51,919
Speaker 2: don't expect tears of joy.

1400
01:06:52,080 --> 01:06:54,000
Speaker 1: No fact, you're supposed to shake tears of joy at

1401
01:06:54,040 --> 01:06:54,320
Speaker 1: your way.

1402
01:06:54,480 --> 01:06:56,400
Speaker 6: I was crying for like ten minutes in the shower

1403
01:06:56,400 --> 01:06:59,040
Speaker 6: before I put my suit on. My homeboys out there

1404
01:06:59,040 --> 01:07:01,040
Speaker 6: getting ready. I'm just in it. Been trying to clean up,

1405
01:07:01,040 --> 01:07:04,120
Speaker 6: like song go out there looking toe up. Yeah, like

1406
01:07:04,240 --> 01:07:05,880
Speaker 6: this shit really going on today, That's all I was

1407
01:07:05,880 --> 01:07:09,920
Speaker 6: telling myself in the shower. Yeah, for sure, that was

1408
01:07:09,960 --> 01:07:12,000
Speaker 6: like probably the biggest thing I ever did. What the

1409
01:07:12,480 --> 01:07:15,680
Speaker 6: biggest moment my life other than my son, Like no tour,

1410
01:07:16,000 --> 01:07:19,560
Speaker 6: no show, no big chick could amount to that day

1411
01:07:19,600 --> 01:07:20,040
Speaker 6: for sure.

1412
01:07:21,680 --> 01:07:24,160
Speaker 1: Congratulations eighteen twenty two.

1413
01:07:24,200 --> 01:07:26,280
Speaker 2: Man, he who finds your wife finds a good thing

1414
01:07:26,320 --> 01:07:27,720
Speaker 2: and a teans paper from the Lord.

1415
01:07:28,560 --> 01:07:30,680
Speaker 5: I really really admire y'all.

1416
01:07:30,720 --> 01:07:34,120
Speaker 4: What y'all got, y'all, Thank you, Alice, the empire, y'all building,

1417
01:07:34,680 --> 01:07:38,000
Speaker 4: How y'all raising y'all, little boy, how you're breaking generational curses.

1418
01:07:38,080 --> 01:07:38,320
Speaker 1: House.

1419
01:07:38,600 --> 01:07:41,960
Speaker 4: It's gonna get It's going to get easier and easier

1420
01:07:41,960 --> 01:07:44,680
Speaker 4: with time with your dad if you just keep going,

1421
01:07:45,200 --> 01:07:48,000
Speaker 4: you know, like like Mona said, it's hard for you

1422
01:07:48,040 --> 01:07:50,919
Speaker 4: and it's also hard for him. But I know it'll

1423
01:07:50,960 --> 01:07:55,040
Speaker 4: get It'll get right, you know, yeah time.

1424
01:07:55,640 --> 01:07:57,000
Speaker 2: Because she's giving you that look like she want to

1425
01:07:57,000 --> 01:08:00,160
Speaker 2: go make another one man?

1426
01:08:03,080 --> 01:08:06,480
Speaker 1: Yes, but no, who did? The body comes out this Friday.

1427
01:08:06,400 --> 01:08:07,240
Speaker 6: Friday seventeen.

1428
01:08:08,920 --> 01:08:12,520
Speaker 3: Look at them, look at that, look at us, see

1429
01:08:12,560 --> 01:08:15,640
Speaker 3: that people stamp. Yeah, that's a proud of us. Look

1430
01:08:15,640 --> 01:08:18,479
Speaker 3: at us. Magazine stamp.

1431
01:08:18,880 --> 01:08:19,920
Speaker 5: Yeah, I love it.

1432
01:08:20,600 --> 01:08:23,040
Speaker 2: Keep going, generational curse breakers, man, that's the best work

1433
01:08:23,040 --> 01:08:24,960
Speaker 2: that y'all can do. Not being afraid to come out

1434
01:08:24,960 --> 01:08:27,720
Speaker 2: here and tell y'all stories and just being this amazing

1435
01:08:27,800 --> 01:08:28,840
Speaker 2: example of black love.

1436
01:08:28,920 --> 01:08:29,840
Speaker 1: Man. Salute to y'all.

1437
01:08:30,200 --> 01:08:33,479
Speaker 3: Thank you so much, absolutely, thank you'all. Yes, thank y'all

1438
01:08:33,479 --> 01:08:34,160
Speaker 3: for having us.

1439
01:08:34,680 --> 01:08:36,639
Speaker 1: Vegas is the breakfast club.

1440
01:08:37,840 --> 01:08:54,759
Speaker 8: It's not Mono Leo, Mona Leo le You sound white every.

1441
01:08:49,200 --> 01:08:53,720
Speaker 1: Day a week ago, breakfast club. Finish, y'all done,