Speaker 1: Let's talk about energy match in a relationship. Now, one
Speaker 1: would say opposites a tract. So why does someone have
Speaker 1: to be a good energy match. You can be the
Speaker 1: opposite to someone, but there's an energy match and there
Speaker 1: is some crossover. Being an exact polar opposite might not work.
Speaker 1: I know a friend who met a guy in the
Speaker 1: club scene and they used to go out to clubs
Speaker 1: a lot, and it's not really who he was. It
Speaker 1: was kind of only who he wanted to be when
Speaker 1: he got laid and she thought she was marrying someone fun,
Speaker 1: and she was marrying a dud and a stick in
Speaker 1: the mud and a drag on the ticket. And it's
Speaker 1: been a challenge and you end up going to other
Speaker 1: places and with your own friends to do things. But
Speaker 1: it's nice to do something with your own partner. And
Speaker 1: I've experienced this where it's not been an energy match,
Speaker 1: and it's something not discussed as much as other things.
Speaker 1: Hey wait, where do they live? Where are they from?
Speaker 1: The Italian? What you know? All these things? Are they kind?
Speaker 1: Are they funny? All these things are important and they're discussed,
Speaker 1: but energy match is not discussed enough. And it's critical.
Speaker 1: It's literally critical. There was a person I saw on
Speaker 1: social media talking about attraction, talking about desire, talking about commitment,
Speaker 1: do you want to commit? But ultimately talking about compatibility.
Speaker 1: It was a dating expert, like, that's an energy match.
Speaker 1: Are you compatible with the person? Do you feel like
Speaker 1: you want to go out at night and this person
Speaker 1: falls asleep at nine o'clock and you're dragging them? Then
Speaker 1: you feel it feels boring, Like nothing feels worse than
Speaker 1: when someone gets to a restaurant and you know that
Speaker 1: they immediately want to leave. It's like a drag. It's
Speaker 1: just an energy you think. Nothing feels worse than when
Speaker 1: you're always creating the fun. You're the life, you're the light,
Speaker 1: and they extinguish the light. It wears on you. It
Speaker 1: makes you depressed and it's not a good match. Or
Speaker 1: someone doesn't like the cold, they don't like skiing. You
Speaker 1: love skiing, it's part of your life. Mountains, someone only
Speaker 1: you know, someone only wants to sit their ass on
Speaker 1: a They're kind of lazy, they're not adventurous. Like these
Speaker 1: things they add up energetically. You need a good energy match,
Speaker 1: and it's undeniable. It doesn't mean you don't you don't
Speaker 1: have fun with the other person or connect with the
Speaker 1: other person, or you could have great sexual chemistry, but
Speaker 1: it might not be a good energy match. And if
Speaker 1: you're not a good energy match, it could affect the
Speaker 1: sexual chemistry. Because nothing's worse than being a person who
Speaker 1: has the light and the darkness extinguishes your light. Okay, alive.
Speaker 1: Now that doesn't mean I'm in a good mood all
Speaker 1: the time. It doesn't mean I'm cheery. I have the light.
Speaker 1: I am alive. Okay, you know it. If you're alive,
Speaker 1: I am alive. And when I am in really, I
Speaker 1: have ended relationships because my light is being extinguished. And
Speaker 1: I've tried so hard I want to be in the relationship,
Speaker 1: and I have a hard time getting out. But when
Speaker 1: you really realize your light, the very inner you, the
Speaker 1: light bulb inside of you, is being extinguished, it starts
Speaker 1: to kill you slowly and you are just sort of
Speaker 1: a little bit dead, and negativity will pull you down
Speaker 1: way more strongly than your positivity will pull a negative
Speaker 1: person up. A positive person can't make a depressed or
Speaker 1: negative person positive. And it's extremely debilitating and it's been
Speaker 1: really challenging in certain relationships, and it's a really big
Speaker 1: girl decision, big boy decision that you have to make.
Speaker 1: So do not let anyone put out your light. Another
Speaker 1: thing I want to discuss is money and relationships and
Speaker 1: young girls who want to marry someone rich. I hear
Speaker 1: it all the time, and mothers who say it's just
Speaker 1: as easy to marry a rich man as a poor man. Okay,
Speaker 1: it is. It is to just get down the aisle,
Speaker 1: you know, it's not easy. My life coach said to
Speaker 1: me that you said, you need to be with someone
Speaker 1: who is something or is going to be something. So
Speaker 1: you could meet a poor person that is going to
Speaker 1: be something. You can just tell they have that hunger,
Speaker 1: et cetera. But he said this to me because he
Speaker 1: felt that if I was in a relationship with someone
Speaker 1: who lacked the light, meaning they lack passion, they lack drive,
Speaker 1: they lack determination, it will never work because I need
Speaker 1: to be with someone who is something because they've done
Speaker 1: it or they're going to be something, because they're going
Speaker 1: to do it, and that's critical, and that's not really
Speaker 1: Someone could have money who lacks drive and determination. Maybe
Speaker 1: it's been handed to them, you know, maybe they got lucky.
Speaker 1: There are a million ways, but if they lack drive
Speaker 1: and determination, and you're a person who's alive and you
Speaker 1: have drive and determination, it could be a bad energy match.
Speaker 1: So when mothers tell their daughters you want, it's just
Speaker 1: as easy to marry someone rich as poor. Let me
Speaker 1: discuss that dynamic. You marry for money, you pay the
Speaker 1: rest of your life. You marry someone because they're wealthy,
Speaker 1: or even as a big part, because they're wealthy without
Speaker 1: the rest. That's just the frosting. Well, it's going to
Speaker 1: happen to a woman. It's going to reduce your ambition,
Speaker 1: reduce your motivation because you know you're taken care of,
Speaker 1: you're on the program, you have a sponsor, so you
Speaker 1: don't need to work as hard. And when you're young,
Speaker 1: and it's like a good gimmick and everyone thinks it's
Speaker 1: so great. Oh my god, you're so cute. You always
Speaker 1: look perfect, you have the bag. Your lunching is a verb,
Speaker 1: your shopping is a verb. And everybody wants your life.
Speaker 1: And you have a big ring and you had a
Speaker 1: great wedding, and everybody's jealous and they all want your
Speaker 1: life because that's what you're portraying. That's what The Housewives
Speaker 1: was made of. And built on fronting and stunting. It's
Speaker 1: more important for other people to think I have money
Speaker 1: or a good life than for me to actually have it.
Speaker 1: People could be in foreclosure and broke, and websites are
Speaker 1: writing there worth thirty five to fifty million dollars. It
Speaker 1: is absolutely untrue. These shows are about fronting and stunting,
Speaker 1: and girls who marry for money want a front and stunt,
Speaker 1: or they have to front and stunt because it's going
Speaker 1: to make them feel better. And what happens is you
Speaker 1: end up medicating and the men end up with the power.
Speaker 1: Sooner or later, no matter how it goes. Men know
Speaker 1: every dollar, and if he or she makes the gold,
Speaker 1: they make the rules. And it comes in many different forms.
Speaker 1: One form is that you marry someone with money and
Speaker 1: it's kind of their program. Ultimately, where you're gonna live,
Speaker 1: what you're gonna do, where you're gonna go on vacation,
Speaker 1: the life you guys are going to live will ultimately
Speaker 1: be he or she who makes the gold makes the rules.
Speaker 1: And it could be subtle, but it builds up. It's
Speaker 1: gonna be you don't have your own money, you don't
Speaker 1: know where the finances are, and you're medicating with stuff too.
Speaker 1: If you really don't have your own purpose and your
Speaker 1: own job, and then your kids grow up, leave school
Speaker 1: and you're an empty nester, there's no fucking way that
Speaker 1: just being married to someone rich is gonna fulfill you.
Speaker 1: There's no way you could. I've heard talked to too
Speaker 1: many people. Okay, you're medicating with stuff. Then what happens
Speaker 1: is you medicate with bags, you medicate with watches, you
Speaker 1: medicate with jeely and I've done it. I've done it
Speaker 1: because when we're young, we want the easy way out.
Speaker 1: In a way, it's like you just want to meet someone.
Speaker 1: They're gonna save you, They're gonna take care of you.
Speaker 1: The mom is right. It's just as easy to marry
Speaker 1: a rich man or a poor man. But do it.
Speaker 1: Once you have your own thing. You can marry someone rich,
Speaker 1: you can marry someone poor, you can marry someone old,
Speaker 1: you can marry someone young. Do it when you have
Speaker 1: your own skill, set, your own money, your own nesting.
Speaker 1: Then you can make clear decisions. You have the cake,
Speaker 1: then you can get the frosting. You cannot frost nothing.
Speaker 1: You have to have the cake. You cannot make a
Speaker 1: life out of a lifestyle you can make a lifestyle
Speaker 1: out of a life. You can marry someone that you
Speaker 1: love and you have your own life and your own freedom.
Speaker 1: But you could trust and believe if you marry someone
Speaker 1: for money, you're gonna pay the rest of your life.
Speaker 1: You're gonna be medicating with stuff, and the medication is
Speaker 1: to mask the real symptoms, which are boredom. You're not
Speaker 1: sexually stimulated, you're not intellectually stimulated, you're not emotionally stimulated.
Speaker 1: You don't respect the partner, you're turned off, whatever it is.
Speaker 1: You're gonna feel trapped. If you are in a situation
Speaker 1: and you don't have any money and no access to
Speaker 1: making money, you're gonna feel trapped, and slowly but surely,
Speaker 1: it's gonna be death by a thousand paper cuts. You're
Speaker 1: gonna be doing what the other person wants to do,
Speaker 1: whether subtly or outwardly, and they make the fucking rules.
Speaker 1: One day, they're gonna be having sex, cheating on you.
Speaker 1: You feel like a bigger loser. You're gonna be complaining
Speaker 1: you were there when they made it. All these things
Speaker 1: are not cliches. They're true. All these things are true.
Speaker 1: All these things are why sixty percent end up in divorce.
Speaker 1: So just remember he or she who makes the gold
Speaker 1: makes the rules. And if you marry for money, you
Speaker 1: will pay for the rest of your life. And listen
Speaker 1: to this. I made money, I have money. I can
Speaker 1: buy myself flowers, I can buy myself bags. I have
Speaker 1: been in relationships and had so many luxury items bought
Speaker 1: for me with me, and it was medicating. I was
Speaker 1: medicating because I wasn't happy and it was something to
Speaker 1: do to fill avoid And it's a quick hit, that's
Speaker 1: the honest truth. And then I've wanted to purge it
Speaker 1: all because I don't need it. It's medicating. Just trust me,
Speaker 1: and you know what I'm talking about. Stuff. It's more
Speaker 1: stuff because it makes you avoid what's really going on.
Speaker 1: True happy people probably don't need any stuff. They don't
Speaker 1: want any stuff. They're not flexing, they're not trying to
Speaker 1: make everybody else think they have such a great life.
Speaker 1: They're just living. And I don't think the moms are
Speaker 1: right who say because it may be easy in the
Speaker 1: short term, maybe easy in the short term, but it
Speaker 1: won't be easy in the long term.