1 00:00:13,160 --> 00:00:17,520 Speaker 1: Let's talk about energy match in a relationship. Now, one 2 00:00:17,520 --> 00:00:20,320 Speaker 1: would say opposites a tract. So why does someone have 3 00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:22,200 Speaker 1: to be a good energy match. You can be the 4 00:00:22,239 --> 00:00:26,759 Speaker 1: opposite to someone, but there's an energy match and there 5 00:00:26,840 --> 00:00:30,240 Speaker 1: is some crossover. Being an exact polar opposite might not work. 6 00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:32,519 Speaker 1: I know a friend who met a guy in the 7 00:00:32,560 --> 00:00:35,040 Speaker 1: club scene and they used to go out to clubs 8 00:00:35,040 --> 00:00:37,440 Speaker 1: a lot, and it's not really who he was. It 9 00:00:37,479 --> 00:00:39,000 Speaker 1: was kind of only who he wanted to be when 10 00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:41,560 Speaker 1: he got laid and she thought she was marrying someone fun, 11 00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:45,280 Speaker 1: and she was marrying a dud and a stick in 12 00:00:45,320 --> 00:00:47,720 Speaker 1: the mud and a drag on the ticket. And it's 13 00:00:47,760 --> 00:00:50,519 Speaker 1: been a challenge and you end up going to other 14 00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:52,400 Speaker 1: places and with your own friends to do things. But 15 00:00:52,440 --> 00:00:55,320 Speaker 1: it's nice to do something with your own partner. And 16 00:00:55,400 --> 00:00:58,440 Speaker 1: I've experienced this where it's not been an energy match, 17 00:00:58,480 --> 00:01:01,200 Speaker 1: and it's something not discussed as much as other things. 18 00:01:01,440 --> 00:01:04,000 Speaker 1: Hey wait, where do they live? Where are they from? 19 00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:06,720 Speaker 1: The Italian? What you know? All these things? Are they kind? 20 00:01:06,760 --> 00:01:09,399 Speaker 1: Are they funny? All these things are important and they're discussed, 21 00:01:09,520 --> 00:01:13,240 Speaker 1: but energy match is not discussed enough. And it's critical. 22 00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:15,800 Speaker 1: It's literally critical. There was a person I saw on 23 00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:20,600 Speaker 1: social media talking about attraction, talking about desire, talking about commitment, 24 00:01:20,640 --> 00:01:23,600 Speaker 1: do you want to commit? But ultimately talking about compatibility. 25 00:01:23,600 --> 00:01:26,040 Speaker 1: It was a dating expert, like, that's an energy match. 26 00:01:26,080 --> 00:01:28,680 Speaker 1: Are you compatible with the person? Do you feel like 27 00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:30,240 Speaker 1: you want to go out at night and this person 28 00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:33,160 Speaker 1: falls asleep at nine o'clock and you're dragging them? Then 29 00:01:33,240 --> 00:01:35,920 Speaker 1: you feel it feels boring, Like nothing feels worse than 30 00:01:35,920 --> 00:01:37,480 Speaker 1: when someone gets to a restaurant and you know that 31 00:01:37,480 --> 00:01:39,840 Speaker 1: they immediately want to leave. It's like a drag. It's 32 00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:42,280 Speaker 1: just an energy you think. Nothing feels worse than when 33 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:45,959 Speaker 1: you're always creating the fun. You're the life, you're the light, 34 00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:48,680 Speaker 1: and they extinguish the light. It wears on you. It 35 00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:51,880 Speaker 1: makes you depressed and it's not a good match. Or 36 00:01:51,960 --> 00:01:54,880 Speaker 1: someone doesn't like the cold, they don't like skiing. You 37 00:01:54,960 --> 00:01:58,160 Speaker 1: love skiing, it's part of your life. Mountains, someone only 38 00:01:58,200 --> 00:01:59,880 Speaker 1: you know, someone only wants to sit their ass on 39 00:01:59,920 --> 00:02:03,320 Speaker 1: a They're kind of lazy, they're not adventurous. Like these 40 00:02:03,360 --> 00:02:07,160 Speaker 1: things they add up energetically. You need a good energy match, 41 00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:10,359 Speaker 1: and it's undeniable. It doesn't mean you don't you don't 42 00:02:10,400 --> 00:02:11,880 Speaker 1: have fun with the other person or connect with the 43 00:02:11,880 --> 00:02:14,560 Speaker 1: other person, or you could have great sexual chemistry, but 44 00:02:14,639 --> 00:02:16,120 Speaker 1: it might not be a good energy match. And if 45 00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:17,919 Speaker 1: you're not a good energy match, it could affect the 46 00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:21,920 Speaker 1: sexual chemistry. Because nothing's worse than being a person who 47 00:02:22,040 --> 00:02:27,840 Speaker 1: has the light and the darkness extinguishes your light. Okay, alive. 48 00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:30,000 Speaker 1: Now that doesn't mean I'm in a good mood all 49 00:02:30,080 --> 00:02:33,720 Speaker 1: the time. It doesn't mean I'm cheery. I have the light. 50 00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:37,120 Speaker 1: I am alive. Okay, you know it. If you're alive, 51 00:02:37,639 --> 00:02:40,400 Speaker 1: I am alive. And when I am in really, I 52 00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:43,960 Speaker 1: have ended relationships because my light is being extinguished. And 53 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:46,560 Speaker 1: I've tried so hard I want to be in the relationship, 54 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:48,919 Speaker 1: and I have a hard time getting out. But when 55 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:53,080 Speaker 1: you really realize your light, the very inner you, the 56 00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:56,000 Speaker 1: light bulb inside of you, is being extinguished, it starts 57 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:58,480 Speaker 1: to kill you slowly and you are just sort of 58 00:02:58,480 --> 00:03:02,280 Speaker 1: a little bit dead, and negativity will pull you down 59 00:03:02,919 --> 00:03:07,240 Speaker 1: way more strongly than your positivity will pull a negative 60 00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:10,160 Speaker 1: person up. A positive person can't make a depressed or 61 00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:14,880 Speaker 1: negative person positive. And it's extremely debilitating and it's been 62 00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:19,519 Speaker 1: really challenging in certain relationships, and it's a really big 63 00:03:19,560 --> 00:03:21,839 Speaker 1: girl decision, big boy decision that you have to make. 64 00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:37,200 Speaker 1: So do not let anyone put out your light. Another 65 00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:40,000 Speaker 1: thing I want to discuss is money and relationships and 66 00:03:40,280 --> 00:03:42,840 Speaker 1: young girls who want to marry someone rich. I hear 67 00:03:42,880 --> 00:03:45,680 Speaker 1: it all the time, and mothers who say it's just 68 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:47,920 Speaker 1: as easy to marry a rich man as a poor man. Okay, 69 00:03:48,080 --> 00:03:51,080 Speaker 1: it is. It is to just get down the aisle, 70 00:03:51,520 --> 00:03:54,240 Speaker 1: you know, it's not easy. My life coach said to 71 00:03:54,280 --> 00:03:57,200 Speaker 1: me that you said, you need to be with someone 72 00:03:57,560 --> 00:04:00,280 Speaker 1: who is something or is going to be something. So 73 00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:02,440 Speaker 1: you could meet a poor person that is going to 74 00:04:02,440 --> 00:04:04,440 Speaker 1: be something. You can just tell they have that hunger, 75 00:04:04,480 --> 00:04:07,880 Speaker 1: et cetera. But he said this to me because he 76 00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:10,480 Speaker 1: felt that if I was in a relationship with someone 77 00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:14,840 Speaker 1: who lacked the light, meaning they lack passion, they lack drive, 78 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:17,800 Speaker 1: they lack determination, it will never work because I need 79 00:04:17,839 --> 00:04:19,960 Speaker 1: to be with someone who is something because they've done 80 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:22,719 Speaker 1: it or they're going to be something, because they're going 81 00:04:22,760 --> 00:04:26,039 Speaker 1: to do it, and that's critical, and that's not really 82 00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:29,880 Speaker 1: Someone could have money who lacks drive and determination. Maybe 83 00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:32,760 Speaker 1: it's been handed to them, you know, maybe they got lucky. 84 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:35,480 Speaker 1: There are a million ways, but if they lack drive 85 00:04:35,520 --> 00:04:38,840 Speaker 1: and determination, and you're a person who's alive and you 86 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:42,480 Speaker 1: have drive and determination, it could be a bad energy match. 87 00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:45,520 Speaker 1: So when mothers tell their daughters you want, it's just 88 00:04:45,520 --> 00:04:47,800 Speaker 1: as easy to marry someone rich as poor. Let me 89 00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:50,800 Speaker 1: discuss that dynamic. You marry for money, you pay the 90 00:04:50,839 --> 00:04:55,480 Speaker 1: rest of your life. You marry someone because they're wealthy, 91 00:04:55,560 --> 00:04:59,120 Speaker 1: or even as a big part, because they're wealthy without 92 00:04:59,200 --> 00:05:02,240 Speaker 1: the rest. That's just the frosting. Well, it's going to 93 00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:05,960 Speaker 1: happen to a woman. It's going to reduce your ambition, 94 00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:09,200 Speaker 1: reduce your motivation because you know you're taken care of, 95 00:05:09,680 --> 00:05:12,120 Speaker 1: you're on the program, you have a sponsor, so you 96 00:05:12,200 --> 00:05:14,040 Speaker 1: don't need to work as hard. And when you're young, 97 00:05:14,360 --> 00:05:16,479 Speaker 1: and it's like a good gimmick and everyone thinks it's 98 00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:18,359 Speaker 1: so great. Oh my god, you're so cute. You always 99 00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:21,479 Speaker 1: look perfect, you have the bag. Your lunching is a verb, 100 00:05:21,880 --> 00:05:24,640 Speaker 1: your shopping is a verb. And everybody wants your life. 101 00:05:24,720 --> 00:05:26,120 Speaker 1: And you have a big ring and you had a 102 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:28,840 Speaker 1: great wedding, and everybody's jealous and they all want your 103 00:05:28,880 --> 00:05:31,800 Speaker 1: life because that's what you're portraying. That's what The Housewives 104 00:05:31,880 --> 00:05:34,880 Speaker 1: was made of. And built on fronting and stunting. It's 105 00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:37,800 Speaker 1: more important for other people to think I have money 106 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:40,160 Speaker 1: or a good life than for me to actually have it. 107 00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:43,240 Speaker 1: People could be in foreclosure and broke, and websites are 108 00:05:43,279 --> 00:05:45,479 Speaker 1: writing there worth thirty five to fifty million dollars. It 109 00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:49,279 Speaker 1: is absolutely untrue. These shows are about fronting and stunting, 110 00:05:49,720 --> 00:05:52,919 Speaker 1: and girls who marry for money want a front and stunt, 111 00:05:53,080 --> 00:05:54,760 Speaker 1: or they have to front and stunt because it's going 112 00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:56,719 Speaker 1: to make them feel better. And what happens is you 113 00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:59,599 Speaker 1: end up medicating and the men end up with the power. 114 00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:03,359 Speaker 1: Sooner or later, no matter how it goes. Men know 115 00:06:03,440 --> 00:06:07,120 Speaker 1: every dollar, and if he or she makes the gold, 116 00:06:07,160 --> 00:06:09,920 Speaker 1: they make the rules. And it comes in many different forms. 117 00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:15,240 Speaker 1: One form is that you marry someone with money and 118 00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:18,719 Speaker 1: it's kind of their program. Ultimately, where you're gonna live, 119 00:06:19,279 --> 00:06:22,320 Speaker 1: what you're gonna do, where you're gonna go on vacation, 120 00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:26,080 Speaker 1: the life you guys are going to live will ultimately 121 00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:28,880 Speaker 1: be he or she who makes the gold makes the rules. 122 00:06:28,920 --> 00:06:31,640 Speaker 1: And it could be subtle, but it builds up. It's 123 00:06:31,640 --> 00:06:33,000 Speaker 1: gonna be you don't have your own money, you don't 124 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:36,760 Speaker 1: know where the finances are, and you're medicating with stuff too. 125 00:06:36,880 --> 00:06:38,560 Speaker 1: If you really don't have your own purpose and your 126 00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:40,520 Speaker 1: own job, and then your kids grow up, leave school 127 00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:42,680 Speaker 1: and you're an empty nester, there's no fucking way that 128 00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:44,520 Speaker 1: just being married to someone rich is gonna fulfill you. 129 00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:46,880 Speaker 1: There's no way you could. I've heard talked to too 130 00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:50,839 Speaker 1: many people. Okay, you're medicating with stuff. Then what happens 131 00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:52,919 Speaker 1: is you medicate with bags, you medicate with watches, you 132 00:06:52,960 --> 00:06:55,680 Speaker 1: medicate with jeely and I've done it. I've done it 133 00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:58,800 Speaker 1: because when we're young, we want the easy way out. 134 00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:00,240 Speaker 1: In a way, it's like you just want to meet someone. 135 00:07:00,240 --> 00:07:01,880 Speaker 1: They're gonna save you, They're gonna take care of you. 136 00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:03,640 Speaker 1: The mom is right. It's just as easy to marry 137 00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:05,840 Speaker 1: a rich man or a poor man. But do it. 138 00:07:05,880 --> 00:07:08,120 Speaker 1: Once you have your own thing. You can marry someone rich, 139 00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:10,160 Speaker 1: you can marry someone poor, you can marry someone old, 140 00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:11,920 Speaker 1: you can marry someone young. Do it when you have 141 00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:13,960 Speaker 1: your own skill, set, your own money, your own nesting. 142 00:07:14,240 --> 00:07:16,560 Speaker 1: Then you can make clear decisions. You have the cake, 143 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:20,160 Speaker 1: then you can get the frosting. You cannot frost nothing. 144 00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:23,320 Speaker 1: You have to have the cake. You cannot make a 145 00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:27,400 Speaker 1: life out of a lifestyle you can make a lifestyle 146 00:07:27,440 --> 00:07:30,200 Speaker 1: out of a life. You can marry someone that you 147 00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:33,200 Speaker 1: love and you have your own life and your own freedom. 148 00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:35,800 Speaker 1: But you could trust and believe if you marry someone 149 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:37,360 Speaker 1: for money, you're gonna pay the rest of your life. 150 00:07:37,880 --> 00:07:41,440 Speaker 1: You're gonna be medicating with stuff, and the medication is 151 00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:46,080 Speaker 1: to mask the real symptoms, which are boredom. You're not 152 00:07:46,320 --> 00:07:50,880 Speaker 1: sexually stimulated, you're not intellectually stimulated, you're not emotionally stimulated. 153 00:07:51,080 --> 00:07:54,680 Speaker 1: You don't respect the partner, you're turned off, whatever it is. 154 00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:58,160 Speaker 1: You're gonna feel trapped. If you are in a situation 155 00:07:58,240 --> 00:08:00,640 Speaker 1: and you don't have any money and no access to 156 00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:04,400 Speaker 1: making money, you're gonna feel trapped, and slowly but surely, 157 00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:06,120 Speaker 1: it's gonna be death by a thousand paper cuts. You're 158 00:08:06,120 --> 00:08:07,640 Speaker 1: gonna be doing what the other person wants to do, 159 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:11,280 Speaker 1: whether subtly or outwardly, and they make the fucking rules. 160 00:08:11,560 --> 00:08:13,640 Speaker 1: One day, they're gonna be having sex, cheating on you. 161 00:08:13,640 --> 00:08:15,600 Speaker 1: You feel like a bigger loser. You're gonna be complaining 162 00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:18,000 Speaker 1: you were there when they made it. All these things 163 00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:21,360 Speaker 1: are not cliches. They're true. All these things are true. 164 00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:23,680 Speaker 1: All these things are why sixty percent end up in divorce. 165 00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:28,640 Speaker 1: So just remember he or she who makes the gold 166 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:31,280 Speaker 1: makes the rules. And if you marry for money, you 167 00:08:31,320 --> 00:08:34,280 Speaker 1: will pay for the rest of your life. And listen 168 00:08:34,320 --> 00:08:37,319 Speaker 1: to this. I made money, I have money. I can 169 00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:40,640 Speaker 1: buy myself flowers, I can buy myself bags. I have 170 00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:46,280 Speaker 1: been in relationships and had so many luxury items bought 171 00:08:46,320 --> 00:08:48,960 Speaker 1: for me with me, and it was medicating. I was 172 00:08:49,080 --> 00:08:53,280 Speaker 1: medicating because I wasn't happy and it was something to 173 00:08:53,360 --> 00:08:55,640 Speaker 1: do to fill avoid And it's a quick hit, that's 174 00:08:55,679 --> 00:08:59,040 Speaker 1: the honest truth. And then I've wanted to purge it 175 00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:03,400 Speaker 1: all because I don't need it. It's medicating. Just trust me, 176 00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:06,400 Speaker 1: and you know what I'm talking about. Stuff. It's more 177 00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:09,160 Speaker 1: stuff because it makes you avoid what's really going on. 178 00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:11,920 Speaker 1: True happy people probably don't need any stuff. They don't 179 00:09:11,920 --> 00:09:14,040 Speaker 1: want any stuff. They're not flexing, they're not trying to 180 00:09:14,040 --> 00:09:15,680 Speaker 1: make everybody else think they have such a great life. 181 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:20,160 Speaker 1: They're just living. And I don't think the moms are 182 00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:22,320 Speaker 1: right who say because it may be easy in the 183 00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:25,240 Speaker 1: short term, maybe easy in the short term, but it 184 00:09:25,240 --> 00:09:48,640 Speaker 1: won't be easy in the long term.