Speaker 1: No entering Stockholm. Hey America, bend over. You've been on,
Speaker 1: You've been doing the new club Diet America. I haven't
Speaker 1: had a carp since eight Were you accept this rose?
Speaker 1: I'd like to finger you this rose into my hair.
Speaker 1: I'm time. The world's gone crazy, you guys, Well we're
Speaker 1: in our safe place. Nothing is safeul lady Ganga jumping
Speaker 1: off the super Bowl like a spider monkey. Whack of do?
Speaker 1: Will you accept this rose? My name is Artemarine. Boy,
Speaker 1: is it good to be here. I'm here with my
Speaker 1: platonic lover, platonic lover Aaron Foley and my co host Aaron.
Speaker 1: How are you, queen? You've a rough one. Listen, let's
Speaker 1: just be. Let's be straight up. All right. Well, we
Speaker 1: elected an illiterate secretary of education. We can start with that.
Speaker 1: And my cat died so other than that, oh my god, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm so pianofully piano. Fully. You know what, when I
Speaker 1: met you, I was not a cat person. And since
Speaker 1: our platonic lady love your friendship, I now am. I
Speaker 1: now own three cats, three I am fully unfalkable, and
Speaker 1: now I host the Bachelor podcast. I'm covered in cat
Speaker 1: hair and wearing bat sleeves in some kind of you
Speaker 1: can pull a house in a comic, but strangely enough,
Speaker 1: you can pull I'm wearing like I look like Mark
Speaker 1: Mark from ORCS. Part of my French retarded sister who
Speaker 1: was like, if you too could go to Flamenco's class,
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna be six. Someday a human male will
Speaker 1: touch my gigantic bosoms. So they grow every year, just
Speaker 1: but right down to the earth. Aaron, how are you?
Speaker 1: Do you have any gigs coming up? I comedy attict
Speaker 1: in Bloomington, Indiana and doing fancy one. I just got
Speaker 1: back from working with Billy Ray Cyrus so fun. He's
Speaker 1: very handsome, He's got like a Burt Reynolds vibe. I
Speaker 1: want to meet with me too. I'm a fan. I'm
Speaker 1: trying my best to get him with the just work.
Speaker 1: Work that angle for Foley, your platonic non sex, same
Speaker 1: sex lever, same sex now, speaking of that would be weird,
Speaker 1: speaking of cats. A lot of people were wondering, and
Speaker 1: we'll get there in a second. We'll get there in
Speaker 1: a second. With us, we have we have actual lovers,
Speaker 1: and they laid their legal lovers and they legally practice
Speaker 1: the art of making love. One of them has the
Speaker 1: largest diamond ring I've ever seen, and the other one
Speaker 1: owns a Super Bowl ring. And it's not just Gizella
Speaker 1: Tom Brady that I'm talking about, it's the much sexier,
Speaker 1: so excited. No, they are not allowed into my hidy hole.
Speaker 1: We have with us my former Chelsie Lately castmate, best
Speaker 1: selling New York Times author Kick Gass, stand up comedian
Speaker 1: Sarah Kelowna, and her legal lover, the kicker for the
Speaker 1: Seattle Seahawks, punter John Ryan. What the difference? What's the difference?
Speaker 1: What's the one? I don't know? Sport? I was never
Speaker 1: picked for a team. There's a bit of a difference,
Speaker 1: is it too. Is there such a thing as a kicker? Yeah,
Speaker 1: they get all the glory of the punters, just like
Speaker 1: they're No, you're the glory, You're my only Do you
Speaker 1: know how important the change of field position is in football?
Speaker 1: I thought there was only one. Pictures are wildly underappreciated,
Speaker 1: Thank you. I was obsessed with Shawn Lindetta growing up
Speaker 1: New York, one of the best punchers in the history
Speaker 1: of the NFL. You guys, well, someone accept my roads now.
Speaker 1: John you had a concussion this year you okay, bo
Speaker 1: I'm totally okay. Yeah. I recovered really really quickly. Did
Speaker 1: Sarah throw a plate at your head? What happened? For
Speaker 1: some reason? Around with the ball? Yeah, and then it
Speaker 1: went really well until it didn't. When you were running
Speaker 1: with the ball, were you thinking to yourself like like
Speaker 1: like like the Rocky team playing where you have nailing it?
Speaker 1: I was like running, I was like, oh, I feel
Speaker 1: twenty two again. I feel like instantly boomty five. So
Speaker 1: I feel all the time. And then then I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm sixty seven years old, but I've had a lot
Speaker 1: of luck done, you guys a lot of work done.
Speaker 1: The best part is when he came to the first
Speaker 1: thing he asked, was I didn't fumble it? Right? Know?
Speaker 1: You actually had it when you went out like you
Speaker 1: started and then you got it? And then how was
Speaker 1: that for you? Watching your lover? I was in the stands.
Speaker 1: It was very dramatic. I speaking of Rocky. I ran
Speaker 1: out of there like Adrian to Rocky. I went screaming
Speaker 1: down the sidelines, like not sidelines. I couldn't get on
Speaker 1: the sidelines, but I went to the locker room. But
Speaker 1: I went there frantically thinking he was head passed. Are
Speaker 1: you friends with the other girlfriends and wives? Are you fun?
Speaker 1: Whether they are they like, definitely a fun one, but
Speaker 1: I don't know if they know that. Okay, we just
Speaker 1: answered the question. Yeah, I if you don't mind. My
Speaker 1: mother is your fan and um she actually people we
Speaker 1: my mother. My mother. Both of her dogs died within
Speaker 1: a month of each other this fall. And so last
Speaker 1: time I was doing a pipe, she called in and
Speaker 1: she had just she was on high alert because some
Speaker 1: cat hoarder had just brought eighty cats to a shelter
Speaker 1: last week, so she was on Everybody was tweeting me
Speaker 1: to wonder. I'm gonna call her right now, just for
Speaker 1: one second. This is Jane Marine. She saw you with her.
Speaker 1: She saw you. He'll find out here is a blizzard
Speaker 1: right now, that's right. But yeah, got it today. Hi mom,
Speaker 1: Tom Brady. I'm good. I'm on the podcast right now
Speaker 1: and everybody. I have two things I want to ask everybody,
Speaker 1: and the everybody keeps tweeting me. They want to know
Speaker 1: if you ended up getting a cat. Oh, I have
Speaker 1: her on my lap as we speak. She has has
Speaker 1: what's her name? I could call her. But she's she's
Speaker 1: called Mittens. She's got a cat named Mittens. Recently, last
Speaker 1: she had like two days ago. She was She called
Speaker 1: during the podcast all excited that a hoarder had dropped
Speaker 1: off eighty cats and she was on her way to
Speaker 1: her house and they would bring into a shelter, shelter.
Speaker 1: I'm here with Sarah Cloonan. Now you saw her at
Speaker 1: Radio City Music calledn't You I sure did it. She
Speaker 1: was the author for Chelsea and she was fabulous. Oh
Speaker 1: thank you, I love you and your cat. The whole
Speaker 1: thing was amazing because everybody was there for was from
Speaker 1: New Jersey. Oh, yes, so much. Yes, she said you
Speaker 1: killed it. She said, you killed it. I mean, And
Speaker 1: I'm here with a guy. I'm here with her husband.
Speaker 1: He is the punter for the Seattle Seahawks. He has
Speaker 1: a Super Bowl ring John Ryan. You love football, mom.
Speaker 1: Oh yes, well, it's been a very big weekend month
Speaker 1: here she's in Rhode Island. She explained to me we
Speaker 1: hang up, okay, But she didn't explain to me. She
Speaker 1: didn't explain to me what happened in the Super Bowl.
Speaker 1: What did you say to me about Atlanta when they
Speaker 1: were doing the first downs. What were you saying to
Speaker 1: me about it? Well, they will get in the in
Speaker 1: the final quarter when they had such a commanding lead.
Speaker 1: They have all these penalties and they'd be third down. Say,
Speaker 1: somebody would hold somebody one of them defenseman did it twice.
Speaker 1: They got a flag, got automatic first down and sing
Speaker 1: and shing. You don't give Tom Brady and and she'll
Speaker 1: take a mile. And what did you say about Atlanta?
Speaker 1: I felt badly for him because they were they they
Speaker 1: got they were exhausted, they couldn't keep up the pace.
Speaker 1: You screamed into the phone the other day. You did
Speaker 1: it to yourself, assholes, as you were doing like a dance,
Speaker 1: exactly what I did. Say, she's trying to be nice
Speaker 1: about like you did it to yourself assholes. Alright, I
Speaker 1: felt family forms like watching a tennis match. We just
Speaker 1: watched five sets of Nadal in Australian was amazing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was amazing, And you felt self fad that somebody
Speaker 1: had a load. Yeah, well that's why that's why we
Speaker 1: Marines never get in the game. But we do adopt
Speaker 1: a lot of cats, all right, mom, And overall, she
Speaker 1: she she liked Lady Gaga, but you who do you prefer? More?
Speaker 1: Who were going to see for your seventy fifth birthday?
Speaker 1: Katy Perry and Bruno. We're gonna go see Bruno Mars
Speaker 1: at Madison Square Garden on her birthday. There you go,
Speaker 1: her birthday birthday. All right, mama, we'll talk to you later.
Speaker 1: By Okay, there, that explains so much. She's amazing. We're
Speaker 1: going to she's awesome and she goes. You know who?
Speaker 1: We have to go see Britney Spears in Vegas. Have
Speaker 1: you ever seen Britney Spears? I still haven't. Now do
Speaker 1: you want to go with my mom? And I kind of?
Speaker 1: Actually you would love it. I love Britney right now?
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Tony seventeen. It's like, you gotta just
Speaker 1: do but the best that you can. This is a
Speaker 1: ship show. World's gonna be around. I'm gonna guess about
Speaker 1: three and a half months, let's go to Vegas. We're
Speaker 1: let's talk about the Bachelor. We're gonna go to Vegas.
Speaker 1: We're gonna watch Brittany. That's it. Yeah. I mean, as
Speaker 1: a gay woman in the Trump regime, I only have
Speaker 1: about thirty to sixty days to be in public, so
Speaker 1: I gotta get it. In. Yeah, as a woman who
Speaker 1: dresses like a cast member of zoom in ninety eight,
Speaker 1: I'm only gonna be allowed in public for four more hours.
Speaker 1: Hashtag dressed like a woman, hashtag dressed like a woman.
Speaker 1: You let's just really, first of all, Hi, Katie listeners
Speaker 1: at emailing and they want to hear more from you.
Speaker 1: So we're gonna have to have Katie's corner later a quarter.
Speaker 1: That's a great idea. And by the way, everybody, Anna
Speaker 1: made it safely to Iran. Okay, Anna isn't fucking Iran
Speaker 1: this we believe it. Okay, everything's going off roting. I
Speaker 1: wanted to stay for the record. I don't know where
Speaker 1: you stand. I think this season sucks. This season sucks, right,
Speaker 1: he sucks. I was so excited. Yeah, this was a
Speaker 1: weird episode, John, tell me, where are you on Nick?
Speaker 1: Right now? I think Nick is a real snowice fest.
Speaker 1: But also it's like it's like the Karn and Nick show.
Speaker 1: Ye there was there was. There was ladies that came
Speaker 1: out on the screen the other day and I was like,
Speaker 1: who she? And we're down to the final six. Sometimes
Speaker 1: you need to start. You're like, well, there's twenty. I
Speaker 1: don't recognize that woman. But now it's like we're right
Speaker 1: down to and I'm like, that girl hasn't been on yet. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and she was kidding that with me. Yeah, she was
Speaker 1: the one of the Concessus picks before the season. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we thought she was so cute. We didn't hear one
Speaker 1: thing from her. It's like because she had nothing to say. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I couldn't believe he Like, yeah, I feel like he's
Speaker 1: a little He was very emotional this season or this
Speaker 1: last episode, crying the entire time. I was really excited
Speaker 1: when they picked him to be the Bachelor, but then
Speaker 1: I realized we're but like and I didn't think it
Speaker 1: was possible to me more boring than Ben. But I
Speaker 1: will say this, at least Ben felt like he was
Speaker 1: looking for love. This is just like a guy, like
Speaker 1: a celebrity looking to extend his run on television. I
Speaker 1: don't hate it that much. I hated Ben. And then
Speaker 1: in the scripture ribs, Uh Jojoe was so fired up
Speaker 1: and I was like, We'm still I'm still in it,
Speaker 1: but this past episode, Uh, part of me like that
Speaker 1: he fired everybody too. I did like, and we're down
Speaker 1: to six, which means we just it's gonna get a
Speaker 1: little it's gonna get dirtier before he just stick his
Speaker 1: schwan in every hole, um, including probably you know and
Speaker 1: all the producers. Yeah. But the crying, which we'll get
Speaker 1: to at the end of the episode, I literally was like, oh,
Speaker 1: get over. I was like, oh, you're stop it. And
Speaker 1: I mean and his tears not to be I don't.
Speaker 1: I'm not going to trump Shumer this because I do
Speaker 1: think the Chuck Schumer was upset the other day. Um,
Speaker 1: but Nick looked like the tears come right from the
Speaker 1: middle and there's only one that goes right down. And
Speaker 1: I don't never want to say someone's fake crying if
Speaker 1: they're really upset. But I'm but he was fake, and
Speaker 1: you know when you're crying. I want to see what
Speaker 1: jam Marine said about Atlanta to Nick. Hey, you did
Speaker 1: it to yourself, asshole. Yeah, Karen, you haven't paid any
Speaker 1: attention to any of these other ladies. And I think
Speaker 1: it was fake. I was. I was fascinated by watching
Speaker 1: they only come from the middle and it goes one
Speaker 1: right straight down. Yeah, like a mental blower. I've been
Speaker 1: because the cast is like in act, like I've had
Speaker 1: to do shows or I've had to cry. I've never
Speaker 1: had a real makes your eyes, like when when you're
Speaker 1: cast out of your acting leg and you're like, oh shoot,
Speaker 1: I got hired to cry and I can't execute that.
Speaker 1: The makeup department will come to him like this blow
Speaker 1: or filled with mental crystals and the blow or I
Speaker 1: right before the tape. No, but they didn't do that.
Speaker 1: His was Visine. They don't even have the mental blowers
Speaker 1: on that set, apparently because his was too like I've
Speaker 1: seen the like people go, they loose. You're right like,
Speaker 1: you're bawling. This is just one role right out the middle.
Speaker 1: Do you think it was in front of the women
Speaker 1: that they put it in. Let's say it was Vizine.
Speaker 1: People can cry on cue though he might be one
Speaker 1: of those Your tear ducks are in the corner of
Speaker 1: your eyes. Okay, they're not in the middle. Just enough.
Speaker 1: I guess if he holds it long enough and then
Speaker 1: he blinks, it comes out that way. Right here we go, Ready,
Speaker 1: it was you, guys, I'm sorry. So we started out, Okay,
Speaker 1: So we started out with Taylor going to go talk
Speaker 1: to him in the church. He's he's getting ready, he's
Speaker 1: whining and dining Krin's boobs in the church, and then
Speaker 1: they're the ladies are locked in the Marriott high up
Speaker 1: in the tower, and then the suitcase p A in
Speaker 1: the beginning of Female Suitcase p A goes to get
Speaker 1: the suitcase and uh, Taylor is like, I'm not taking
Speaker 1: this anymore. She lied to you. And Karin is there
Speaker 1: with her Cabbala bracelet talking to Nick with and then
Speaker 1: and then um, he says, this has everything to do
Speaker 1: with where my heart was in this situation and my bonner,
Speaker 1: and and then what Krince said is what I learned
Speaker 1: tonight is cats have nine lives and bitches have to
Speaker 1: don't ever call me a liar in front of my boyfriend. Yeah, listen,
Speaker 1: I was team Karin. I think Taylor when she marched
Speaker 1: back in, she's like, She's like, you know every right
Speaker 1: to be here. I've got it right. And you're like, no,
Speaker 1: you've already been voted off the island, like your shouldn't
Speaker 1: roll out, so you have nothing to say as if
Speaker 1: he could cheat, what was what was the possible? Like
Speaker 1: Nick is going to be like, you know what, Taylor,
Speaker 1: You've got an excellent point. Let me go back into
Speaker 1: the bank. Fest and fire career. I think at that point,
Speaker 1: you're just trying to extend your fifteen minutes. Yeah, you're like,
Speaker 1: there's one more. You know, there's like a producer like go,
Speaker 1: go go. That's just like her trying to extend because
Speaker 1: I mean, for sure she might be trying to secure
Speaker 1: place in Paradise too. True. Now, that's what I feel like.
Speaker 1: They all go on the show now to be like
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get just far enough so I go to Paradise.
Speaker 1: Paradise actually seems like more fun fun. Yeah, it's a
Speaker 1: month in Mexico. Yeah, I've great. Yeah, and you don't
Speaker 1: have to like wait even for the fantasy sweet have sex.
Speaker 1: You can do it and then whenever you want do
Speaker 1: it like daytime. Yeah, I would never say it that resort.
Speaker 1: It's like marriage. Just do it whenever I thought it
Speaker 1: like marriage, just do it whenever you want, all the time.
Speaker 1: You just to get at it. The bonze um. By
Speaker 1: the way, I've had people like like tweeting me the
Speaker 1: phrase the bones one, and it makes me so happy
Speaker 1: that if nothing else, I've given America fingerbagging in the bones.
Speaker 1: You're welcome, America. They're so proud Jenniferan. Okay, so then
Speaker 1: he calls off the cocktail party and Chris Harrison. But
Speaker 1: it's also like, so if you don't get to know
Speaker 1: these girls and you keep calling off the cocktail party, like,
Speaker 1: how are you ever gonna? It's just I don't want
Speaker 1: to bang those three? Yeah, you know, every episode to
Speaker 1: get to can I get when? Am I going to
Speaker 1: get to funk hers? Yeah? Like right before neil in comes,
Speaker 1: but right before and then yeah, and then cut her.
Speaker 1: That's exactly before Nanny shows up to bed and she's
Speaker 1: only awake for like two like twenty minutes a day
Speaker 1: window where she's alert, he's alert. Some weird drapey beige
Speaker 1: outfit there's been tied onto her body. That's bikini. Okay,
Speaker 1: But they cut the Dolphin girl. They cut Alexis Katie.
Speaker 1: What do you think? I was so sad because all
Speaker 1: the little snippets of them in the end they had
Speaker 1: like a real connection, so fun. But I think she'll
Speaker 1: be in Paradise. Yeah. I ended with I want to
Speaker 1: get her on the show. Can we get lady on
Speaker 1: the show? We need to get you know what? I
Speaker 1: think that my Canadian friend will be able to hook
Speaker 1: me up Haley. Haley is friends with Dolphin. Maybe we
Speaker 1: can get them both in here. Yes, and Haley. Haley
Speaker 1: turned out to be a good one. We love Haley.
Speaker 1: I'm deep in now, guy, I'm friends, I'm deep in.
Speaker 1: I am deep in. Okay. So then they cut the
Speaker 1: balls girl, the girl with the balls. I couldn't believe
Speaker 1: that because so Jamie, but the one with the so
Speaker 1: uh raging Lesbo. I've said this from day I can
Speaker 1: say Lesbo America because I am one. She couldn't be
Speaker 1: gay or every snippet, Uh, this is, by the way, fantastic.
Speaker 1: This is not bad news. It's just every time she
Speaker 1: would like people were like consoling everybody, Jamie was like,
Speaker 1: you know, had her hand up everybody's shirt. And I
Speaker 1: was like, but I thought we saw snippets weeks ago
Speaker 1: of her getting pretty far. I was surprised. I thought, truly,
Speaker 1: am I losing my minor? Was she in a conversation
Speaker 1: in a bikini on an island? These feel like they've
Speaker 1: just thrown in the towel. Even at the beginning of
Speaker 1: the episode, they had stuff for this week that never
Speaker 1: happened in the week. Like at the beginning of the
Speaker 1: episode was like coming up tonight and they had like
Speaker 1: Raven making out with him on some bed, which never happened.
Speaker 1: And then later on they're like, well Raven got the
Speaker 1: group and it was like did she am? I did?
Speaker 1: I wed? Because I was like, wait a minute, we
Speaker 1: didn't see that's right, we didn't see it happen. I
Speaker 1: feel like they had thrown in the towel. The editors
Speaker 1: are like, I'm out, okay, so and they cut crazy Josephine,
Speaker 1: who didn't even end up being that crazy. Well, I
Speaker 1: think she was batship of that up. She was the
Speaker 1: nurse blonde that tried to sing and rapper aspiring nurse, Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's not aspiring dolphin trainer, alexis. Aspiring dolphin trainer is
Speaker 1: really actually just means unemployed. Yeah, just put unemployed. Yeah,
Speaker 1: which is great. You can be a dolphin like I
Speaker 1: want you to be a dolphin trainer. We can say
Speaker 1: to an inspiring asperist inspiring titles Airbnb rental operator, I
Speaker 1: shoot low. So then he goes, guys, guess what we're
Speaker 1: going to say Thomas, and he said the phrase I
Speaker 1: loved the I love the island living. And then he
Speaker 1: did a dance and said I hope I start falling
Speaker 1: in love. I was just like, he doesn't know how
Speaker 1: to love. He really doesn't. He goes from like to
Speaker 1: like I love you right before like he has to
Speaker 1: give a ring, like there's no like. I think he
Speaker 1: really did love Caitlin. I felt that he was she
Speaker 1: was at least fun. I mean, I think I think
Speaker 1: he can say I love you, and I think he
Speaker 1: thinks it. I think he likes to compete more than
Speaker 1: to be competed for. Yeah, but I don't you think
Speaker 1: this episode above, every single episode was the one where
Speaker 1: you're like, he doesn't like any of these wodow, I
Speaker 1: don't think he hasn't paid attention to anything. So then
Speaker 1: he so then the girls they fly them all down
Speaker 1: from the Marriott in New Orleans to the Marriott and St.
Speaker 1: Thomas with some weird reef name, and they have to
Speaker 1: run around these shitty hotels going this is gorgeous and
Speaker 1: they can't you know, They're like, do you do that
Speaker 1: every time you guys tour and like when you're doing
Speaker 1: stand up and check into marryat yes, my courtyard Marriott. Yeah,
Speaker 1: another courtyard with breakfast starting at was a four point
Speaker 1: chairing shared at four points and I'm just jumping around
Speaker 1: with those like those those bed spreads made of like
Speaker 1: scratchy like bed spread. What is the I was in
Speaker 1: some airport and I can't remember the chain, but I
Speaker 1: was going up an escalator and on the handles of
Speaker 1: the escalator pick pick a chain. I can't remember it
Speaker 1: said blah blah blah. We washed the duvets. And I
Speaker 1: was like, oh my god, that should be understood. I
Speaker 1: mean I immediately go into a hotel like a c S.
Speaker 1: I I take that thing of come off the bed
Speaker 1: and I put it com dried on a chair at
Speaker 1: the Palms in Vegas, there was a silver chair with
Speaker 1: a dried come stick. How did you know for sure
Speaker 1: it was because it was facing. I was in some
Speaker 1: sweet and the chair, it was a solo chair, and
Speaker 1: it was facing. They had a they had a like
Speaker 1: a pole in the bathroom like with a shower like
Speaker 1: like a flashditch shower head above it. So it was
Speaker 1: just a viewing chair for the pole in the bathroom.
Speaker 1: And then on the arm was dried white spot. Did
Speaker 1: you ask for the tapes from the hotel? And I
Speaker 1: tried to get pregnant on that chair. The whole weekend,
Speaker 1: and I am so proud note that I stayed in
Speaker 1: such a I stayed this weekend at a homewood sweet
Speaker 1: By that was like I felt like I was in
Speaker 1: It was like nineteen seven divorced Dad. You know what
Speaker 1: I made? Just like there's a they'd made the towel
Speaker 1: into a swan on my bed and I thought, cruise ship.
Speaker 1: I thought, has it come to this? This is my life?
Speaker 1: I lived in the Mochel sixth studio watching when I
Speaker 1: trying to make it the NFL. I lived in a
Speaker 1: motel six The major lea came once a week. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, I had a O L dial up internet.
Speaker 1: This is like twelve years ago. How long did you
Speaker 1: live there for a few months? Did you get bummed out? No?
Speaker 1: I didn't. I think I was just like so focused
Speaker 1: on trying to make the care Where did you grow up, John?
Speaker 1: In Canada? Saskatchewan? And where you Did you know anybody
Speaker 1: when you were there in Arizona? Like when I was
Speaker 1: on my own, Look at you, God, successful story. Have
Speaker 1: there been other people from your high school have made
Speaker 1: who've made it to the NFL. I'm the only I'm
Speaker 1: from a hometown of like two thousand. I'm the only
Speaker 1: one Regina, Regina kidding me at the march on Regina
Speaker 1: running joking with my lesbo friends for a very long
Speaker 1: you're Regina, Well we all are army. Yes, you know,
Speaker 1: it's true, it's so true, but I am. Yeah, you're
Speaker 1: from Regina. That's funny, that's funny. There's a lady in
Speaker 1: my hometown of Little Compton, Rhode Island. There's an old
Speaker 1: woman named pussy Driver. Yeah, there is. And I used
Speaker 1: to have to waitress on her and they'd be like,
Speaker 1: what do you want, pussy And I'd be like, I
Speaker 1: can't pussy Driver. And the golf champ's name is Dick
Speaker 1: Small and he could go my Richard, but he goes
Speaker 1: by Dick. Why wouldn't he just go Richard? And that's
Speaker 1: like a rollerblading name, I mean a roller Derby name. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a good roller Derby name. I love that super
Speaker 1: roller Blade. We had names right there, pussy Driver. There
Speaker 1: was a moment where rollerblading was the jam. It was
Speaker 1: always did I fully owned? I fully owned? Like wrist guards?
Speaker 1: Did you get into roller blades? I came out here
Speaker 1: like right when it was like, you know, like reaching
Speaker 1: a height in like the seven or something, and I
Speaker 1: thought about it, and then how can I get into Yeah?
Speaker 1: I saw people in Venice Boulevard doing it, and I
Speaker 1: was like, I don't think I can even do it.
Speaker 1: If I try, I can't stand up. I put like
Speaker 1: every sport imaginable, but I cannot get my size a
Speaker 1: living something that got wheels on it, especially just one
Speaker 1: roller skates. At least you have like a foundation, you've
Speaker 1: got two wheels on each side. I used to skate
Speaker 1: around Central Park, look at my friends and I would
Speaker 1: just go blade and there was like a guy that
Speaker 1: wore like really tight shorts and he had like snakes
Speaker 1: and stuff nice, and you kind of avoided him with Nick,
Speaker 1: and he's not he was like I could see Nick
Speaker 1: in a pair of tighty whities. Okay, we're back at St.
Speaker 1: Thomas and he's not a tidy Whitey's. He's wearing kids
Speaker 1: in a tank top. That outfit was so utterly ridd
Speaker 1: and he takes Christina on a seaplane. Jasmines left crying.
Speaker 1: But at least they're not locked in the Marriott, like
Speaker 1: they got to be free for a second. Okay, So
Speaker 1: this I want to say, I fell for Christina the
Speaker 1: Russian that was the status story. Yeah, that was the
Speaker 1: worst story lipstick. Yeah, I mean she was so lovely, no, no, sorry,
Speaker 1: she was so cute. She was really sweet, so well spoken. Yeah.
Speaker 1: She story was had a heart like left all of
Speaker 1: her orphan family never seen again. She was so lovely
Speaker 1: and uh and just I just don't think they have
Speaker 1: anything in common and he doesn't know what to do
Speaker 1: with heart. She's like, I hit lipstick, I never see
Speaker 1: a family again, and he's like, I have a big family,
Speaker 1: Like the worst transition. That's really crazy. It's like I've
Speaker 1: always been able to see my family and everything's been great,
Speaker 1: and I just saw him last week in Wisconsin. There's
Speaker 1: like eighty five, my very toll twelve year old sister her.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, she's so Then do they have that?
Speaker 1: And then the girls then do get back locked back
Speaker 1: up in that weird Marriott and Vanessa talks to the
Speaker 1: board girls about the history of St. Thomas. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: but I do think that that what was her name again?
Speaker 1: She's from Montreal or Quebec, Canada, And I feel like
Speaker 1: she's actually pretty smart and she's trying to like dummy
Speaker 1: herself down to be on the show. Yes, I think
Speaker 1: she's actually very intelligent. She knows more US history than
Speaker 1: any of those girls. She was like, I found out
Speaker 1: that this belonged to Denmark until a hundred years ago,
Speaker 1: and now it's star at her, like, what the funk
Speaker 1: are you talking? I've never heard of Denmark. No, but
Speaker 1: you can see that in her. And even like when
Speaker 1: they were playing volleyball, you could tell, all of a
Speaker 1: sudden though, you could see she gets there. She's like
Speaker 1: fucking sexy, stupid, and she's and I wonder if she's
Speaker 1: just like the like she's giving the history of like,
Speaker 1: you know, indigenous people on an island, and then the
Speaker 1: US spotted and then a African American or island woman
Speaker 1: comes in and I literally was like, are you kidding
Speaker 1: right now? So awful when she that transition, I was like,
Speaker 1: is anybody getting is anybody saying what's happening? Are they
Speaker 1: brought in Lorna? It was like it felt like we
Speaker 1: were gone with the wind. I literally was like, this
Speaker 1: isn't happening, This is not happening. It made me so uncomfortable,
Speaker 1: And of course Karin says, now you want to throttle.
Speaker 1: She says to the St. Thomas version of Roquel my Nanny.
Speaker 1: Everyone needs a Roquel or a Laura in the world.
Speaker 1: She brings me lobster dip and peanut Claude is by
Speaker 1: the pool. Anything I need, Laura is there. She's adorable.
Speaker 1: Roquel is going to be jealous? Is that the most
Speaker 1: racist thing that has ever been on? I wanted to
Speaker 1: punch her in the Regina. Yeah, that was literally I
Speaker 1: was like, I am done. Karn has been fun sometimes sound,
Speaker 1: but now I'm like, you're disgusting. Now she's disgusting. First
Speaker 1: of all, she looks like Tiffany Trump, exactly like Tiffany
Speaker 1: she did. I feel like she probably I mean, I
Speaker 1: don't actually think that Tiffany. I think Tiffany Trump is
Speaker 1: hiding most of the time right now because she's probably Jesus,
Speaker 1: But she looks like her said then, I just feel
Speaker 1: like she's like this spoiled businessman's kid. But I think
Speaker 1: that's what she is anyway. Yeah, oh she is. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she runs a multi million dollar company to get him
Speaker 1: on the phone a sap. That's what they said, impression
Speaker 1: art and does that wasn't like the one thing that
Speaker 1: were showing that she's like Iran a multi million work,
Speaker 1: but my dad it's the Raquel lifestyle. And then her
Speaker 1: dad's over the Texas instrument computer. You better get them
Speaker 1: on the phone a sap and he's like like a
Speaker 1: stained and she's like, what is return? Who are you
Speaker 1: guys rooting for? Sarah? John talked to me, who are
Speaker 1: you rooting for? Who are you writing for? John? I
Speaker 1: hope that it comes down right to the end and
Speaker 1: Nick and Neil Lane is run away. It's like Nick,
Speaker 1: I pick this ring, kneel In picked this slit and
Speaker 1: then be like, but it's for you, Neil, Oh my god,
Speaker 1: you just saved this season. That would be a really
Speaker 1: nice that's a really little good. Oh yeah, he would
Speaker 1: be a little gay. Yeah, I don't. I like I
Speaker 1: liked Vanessa. I think Vanessa says too good for him. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and they sort of keep waiting for her, like eject herself. Yes,
Speaker 1: but I just feel like that's he's not going to
Speaker 1: pick Karinn, but he's going to take her to the
Speaker 1: number two. Of course you think Karin's gonna Yeah, he's
Speaker 1: gonna because he's gonna want to get her in the
Speaker 1: top three, have three, he gets to have three in
Speaker 1: this because she's going to go to his hotel room
Speaker 1: next week when he's she remember she's on her way
Speaker 1: to him in the Marriott to make him feel better.
Speaker 1: I want, I wanted. My sex abilities are top not.
Speaker 1: Yeah again, she says it, right. I think if you
Speaker 1: make it that in factor, you guys, she whenever when
Speaker 1: someone says so, she said herself, she goes, I have
Speaker 1: the it factor that guys. Like when someone saying that
Speaker 1: it factory makes me want to fucking my head. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean she's not wearing pants. Yeah exactly, that's what
Speaker 1: the factor gave her. Your face with my vagina in
Speaker 1: your nostrils, Yeah, that's it. That's the factor. That's what
Speaker 1: it is. That's what it is. It is. Yeah, when
Speaker 1: I can look, when I can look through your vagina
Speaker 1: through my nose, that's it. I've always trying to figure
Speaker 1: out why I couldn't quite put my finger on why
Speaker 1: I didn't have you. Jamie does, Jamie Jamie does. Okay,
Speaker 1: I want her on the show so bad so I
Speaker 1: could be like I was voting for Vanessa and now
Speaker 1: I'm bored by Vanessa, I know, because yeah, I want
Speaker 1: her to just be like it's like she was challenging
Speaker 1: him before She's like, well, this is what you want.
Speaker 1: But then last week, all of a sudden, you know,
Speaker 1: aside from getting history lesson, she's bouncing around volleyball volleyball game?
Speaker 1: Is that the worst? That was the worst? Volley You
Speaker 1: texted something? Rob? What did you text? Tex? Rob? I
Speaker 1: have never been so stressed out watching a volleyball game
Speaker 1: in my entire life. And I have never missed an
Speaker 1: Olympics since I was about eight years old. Uh, and
Speaker 1: that was more stressful, so stressed every professional volleyball game
Speaker 1: I've ever seen in my But that reminded me of
Speaker 1: the beach date with Ben and the Pigs when everybody
Speaker 1: lost their ship. Yes, everyone's cry. Supposed to be a
Speaker 1: fun day, Like I thought. I had this fun day
Speaker 1: plan for all my relationships, all my girlfriends, and they're
Speaker 1: all crying. Literally, everyone was in tears by the end
Speaker 1: of the So here We're here? Were the best quotes
Speaker 1: from the volleyball thing? Was my favorite? One was Raven
Speaker 1: about Jasmine and she said, first of all, Nick starts
Speaker 1: it out by doing that fucking dinosaur walk. Can we
Speaker 1: talk about him doing that walk? Honest? And then the
Speaker 1: girls are just having to pick out an out it
Speaker 1: for beach volleyball, like the banning suits that they chose
Speaker 1: like that. Vanessa went bondage that black weird like Darth Vader. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I would be like the lady in the tank, Caney
Speaker 1: trying to China lengthen my limbs signboard short with a
Speaker 1: proper jog bra drunk Karin. Drunk, Karin is like wants
Speaker 1: to go to sleep. And then and then Raven says
Speaker 1: about Jasmine, who's all amped up at this point, if
Speaker 1: Jasmine was a vegetable, she'd be a turnip because she's
Speaker 1: turned all the way up. And then they showed her
Speaker 1: throwing Karan on the corn. That was That was one
Speaker 1: of my favorite moments. All the girls are crying. Vanessa says,
Speaker 1: I've been so patient. It's like, what show do you
Speaker 1: think You're like? I wanted to say again, like you
Speaker 1: did eat to yourself? Asshole? Yeah you know what do
Speaker 1: you think? It's like? Yeah, it lasts this many weeks.
Speaker 1: He's gonna make out with other girls? What what do
Speaker 1: you think is happening? There was another girl that said,
Speaker 1: I Am not going to compete for Nick's attention, said Rachel.
Speaker 1: The entire show and they kept going to him. I mean,
Speaker 1: like I told you. Rachel was like I told you
Speaker 1: I don't like group dates. It's like, well, because you're
Speaker 1: on the Bachelor. Yeah, it's a it's a group show date,
Speaker 1: it's a date. It's a dating show, and some of
Speaker 1: them are on the groups and everyone's competing. Do we
Speaker 1: have to spell it out? We have to be like
Speaker 1: next week on the Bachelor semi colon, it's a dating
Speaker 1: shower and some of you are going to get your
Speaker 1: feelings hurt. I used to like read I don't even
Speaker 1: like Rachel or Vanessa. I liked both of them, and
Speaker 1: they're both just like pouting that they're on the Bachelor.
Speaker 1: It's like, what did you think was gonna? I think
Speaker 1: I think they just realized they're they're losing some of
Speaker 1: their self esteem and self worth and they're fighting it
Speaker 1: because they're both super cool and smart and catches. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and now I think they're embarrassed. She's like, they're also
Speaker 1: they're also like in their thirties. I think they're like
Speaker 1: thirty and thirty one, so they're over this ship. We
Speaker 1: didn't do this anymore? Yeah, like then maybe you shouldn't
Speaker 1: have learned. Yeah, but but I do and then and
Speaker 1: I'm like his only response is like so when Rachel's
Speaker 1: like and I'm thinking about leaving, He's like, okay, great,
Speaker 1: well I can just ask you to keep expressing yourself.
Speaker 1: I'm expressing myself and I'm telling you I kind of
Speaker 1: wanted out. It's like, great, We'll just keep communicating somehow.
Speaker 1: She's like I will, and yeah, but you're not strange.
Speaker 1: It's they're exchanges and Rachel hadn't that exchange too. She's
Speaker 1: just like, I'm pretty much I got like one leg
Speaker 1: out and he's like, okay, just let me know, like
Speaker 1: what door you're looking at? Trying to block the door
Speaker 1: for like another week. I'm going to bank Krin the thing.
Speaker 1: He's the only one in his eyes for his Krin,
Speaker 1: like we're's core and where's like he just like she's
Speaker 1: just off pouting. I feel like the other girls have
Speaker 1: kind of worn down and kind of don't even mind
Speaker 1: Karin anymore. She's like the drunk, sloppy Yeah. I think
Speaker 1: they expected at this point, like this is what there's
Speaker 1: going to be one of these right now? Like who
Speaker 1: who do you like? Paid for him? I like Raven, like,
Speaker 1: who do you who Raven or Orphan? Yeah, but like
Speaker 1: for Nick like who Raven? Raven? I like Raven? Who
Speaker 1: do you like? I like Raven because she's from Arkansas. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's actually like a real girl. Yeah, she's from She
Speaker 1: wears her lingery on top of her she wears poppers.
Speaker 1: Where's yellow Rappers? I have like Texedo tails. Ravens cool?
Speaker 1: And she could meet one of them. I'd meet and
Speaker 1: she like beat up somebody with a stiletto heel and
Speaker 1: she said I saw her vagina. Yeah, I liked that.
Speaker 1: And her mom said, do what you gotta do. Here's
Speaker 1: the car keys, And that means I'm going to see
Speaker 1: the vagina and attack with the heel. She's from Arkansas
Speaker 1: that I'm from even heard of the one she's from
Speaker 1: Hot Yeah, HOAXI how big is your town? Well, when
Speaker 1: I went there, it was like under a thousand people.
Speaker 1: When I went to high school there, there's like maybe
Speaker 1: like three thousand. I met the count of three thousand.
Speaker 1: We didn't have a high school. Well, we didn't have
Speaker 1: a pussy drivers. We had a couple of smalls on
Speaker 1: a jump. Sorry ask a question, Well, no, I just
Speaker 1: you had tweeted out. I think it was a tweet,
Speaker 1: um uh, something about, well, you know, Arden will lead
Speaker 1: the way, we'll get to the whole deal. But but
Speaker 1: you had tweeted out something about Bachelor's Bachelor Steve or
Speaker 1: a reality reality Steve. Do you haven't checked in? Do
Speaker 1: you know? So I don't know who they. I haven't
Speaker 1: read all the way to the end. Yeah, but I like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I checked in before an episode, so we'll go and
Speaker 1: watch the episode. I get a friend's house and she'll
Speaker 1: be like sitting there and like, I wonder what's happened.
Speaker 1: She's like, already know. I don't do that. I don't
Speaker 1: do that. I don't don't tell anyone. Be like I've
Speaker 1: already read exactly what's gonna happen, you know, but I
Speaker 1: don't say it. I don't I already know. You just
Speaker 1: think you tell me, don't. You did it a lot
Speaker 1: on Monday before the episode because I get excited. You
Speaker 1: can't say it. But I don't go all the way,
Speaker 1: so I don't. Okay, in the end, the end is
Speaker 1: in the end, But before an episode, it's like when
Speaker 1: I get a book, I read the end of it,
Speaker 1: or like I do, Yeah, you read the end of
Speaker 1: a book before you read the book. Yeah, like when
Speaker 1: you write like to know, I don't like. I don't
Speaker 1: need to be surprised about it anything. Do you write
Speaker 1: the ending before you write? When you write books, do
Speaker 1: you go do you do the last chapter early on? No,
Speaker 1: that's a good question. But now I'm not that smart.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I had the end. I just like
Speaker 1: to know. And then we worked back and conclusion and
Speaker 1: then I'm married a punter. Then I punted all the
Speaker 1: other men and married they had. I want to get
Speaker 1: to my favorite apart, which is the cut the group
Speaker 1: date nighttime. Let's just cut right to Jasmine. Jasmine's losing
Speaker 1: her ship and when she says I'm gonna put you
Speaker 1: in a chokey and having it going over and over
Speaker 1: and he's like, no, I'm gonna choke you. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: choke you know that was sexual. No, I'm gonna straddle you.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna put you in a chokey thing. That was
Speaker 1: just like it's almost like she just one of those
Speaker 1: things where you someone rips their face off and it's
Speaker 1: someone else's face and she's like it was so say.
Speaker 1: She was just spiralingaling so fast, and it was like
Speaker 1: watching like a car crash and slow motion because you
Speaker 1: know when she was like, because I know they added stuff,
Speaker 1: but like her choking thing there, it was a lot
Speaker 1: different one and was the same one over and over
Speaker 1: like I watched for it to see. I was like,
Speaker 1: is this the same choking thing and they're just repeating
Speaker 1: it to make her look crazy like they were different.
Speaker 1: It really felt like at first it was like anger
Speaker 1: and then you could see like, no, this is her thing,
Speaker 1: and it was like, I'll be and she was like,
Speaker 1: I'll be the first one. Like it started out like
Speaker 1: I'm mad at you, and then I was like I can't.
Speaker 1: You're gonna wait. You see, you're gonna like it. It's
Speaker 1: like if you say like I'm gonna choke you, you
Speaker 1: know you're like oh. But then she was like if
Speaker 1: I had a y, it'll soften it. But I still
Speaker 1: want to wrap my hands around you until until you
Speaker 1: either give me a rose or you die. Yeah, you're right.
Speaker 1: Why is like a little cute see and then you're like,
Speaker 1: choke and give you a little stabby stabby in the face.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's your little penie. Because she tried to
Speaker 1: make it sexy for a moment of like I'll straddle you.
Speaker 1: She said, I'll straddle you, but then I will choke
Speaker 1: you until you, like like the kids, you didn't understand
Speaker 1: what was going to happen, like you will lose consciousness. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and then she kept going, oh my god, oh my god.
Speaker 1: I feel like they just lock them up in a
Speaker 1: marryout they take with their cellphones and they sit there
Speaker 1: for three days. In the time they let them out,
Speaker 1: it's like letting the wild out, and then they do
Speaker 1: things like choke you talk like apartment just to think
Speaker 1: about this, I've thought about I've spent way too much
Speaker 1: time thing about this show, and I do how far
Speaker 1: do you think you can make it up? I really want.
Speaker 1: I wish I could enroll. I wish I could sign
Speaker 1: up just to see out of curiosity, because I feel
Speaker 1: like they would not quite know what to do with
Speaker 1: somebody with any personality. I think you would go far.
Speaker 1: I felt I could get to top ten. Oh no,
Speaker 1: I think you could get to top three. I think
Speaker 1: once I've seen me in a tankini next to like
Speaker 1: a Delo, I'd be out. No, I think you'd get
Speaker 1: to top five and you would be like, I don't
Speaker 1: want to bang this dude, I'm out. I don't want
Speaker 1: to get tea bagged in a sandal until you again
Speaker 1: again you think so oh god. Yeah, you could start
Speaker 1: out the person you're going on with, and you could
Speaker 1: be like, like Nick is a simple a simpleton. He'd
Speaker 1: be like, okay, I know, yeah, okay, Like how because
Speaker 1: I feel like if you have any personality, they'd be
Speaker 1: like they'd be like you're you're you're a live wire,
Speaker 1: like like you're fun, like you actually maybe trying to
Speaker 1: make you, creating you bad jokes too. They would definitely
Speaker 1: try to feed you bad jokes. At least you would
Speaker 1: be like I got my own motherfucker, you know, I'd
Speaker 1: be known as like that. I'd be like, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: finger you figured. I'm just so mady you. I can't
Speaker 1: wait to figure understand. I just fining it down and
Speaker 1: I just put my finger in here. Thank you. I
Speaker 1: gotta think you just get a finger. I'm so mad
Speaker 1: at right now I'm gonna marry I know that if
Speaker 1: this was like reversed and this was the Bachelorette, if
Speaker 1: like a male contestant said to like, you know, Joe, Joe,
Speaker 1: like I'm gonna choke I'm putting him in a choke.
Speaker 1: They'd be in jail. Yeah, him up. Chad did say
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'm gonna put all the floating torsos in
Speaker 1: the pool. He did. Everybody has done that to anyone
Speaker 1: follow You know what I actually we I did talk
Speaker 1: to Daniel the Canadian guy last week. I did talk
Speaker 1: to him last week. He had pneumonia. He's okay. You
Speaker 1: know what, Chad's reached out to him. I'd befriended him
Speaker 1: in Canada. If you ever played yuck X Vancouver, he
Speaker 1: lives here. He's wonderful, wonderful, and he has chatted with Chad,
Speaker 1: but he's taking it slowly with their friendship because Chad's
Speaker 1: little live wire. Right. He is the most Canadian guy
Speaker 1: I've ever seen, Like he goes overboard, Like I know
Speaker 1: that I have some things. I say, they're pretty Canadian.
Speaker 1: You have lived here for he's full Yeah, he's full Canadian. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And during a second John, which we never asked you
Speaker 1: last year because we were tiptoeing it around, Jordan's let's
Speaker 1: just never really a football player, right, I mean, can
Speaker 1: I ask you that? Can you answer this? Jordan was
Speaker 1: definitely a football player. He was never an NFL or
Speaker 1: professional football player. And then is it true that he
Speaker 1: quit football to be in the Las Vegas production of Daniel.
Speaker 1: Nobody ever quits the NFL. No one that hatory ever does.
Speaker 1: They don't. You don't, you don't retire. You're like showing
Speaker 1: the door. And he was just happening to be showing
Speaker 1: the door at four. Yeah, but he got shown the
Speaker 1: door of the non NFL straight to the stage door
Speaker 1: of the Vegas production of Damn Yankee. Yeah. That's usually
Speaker 1: what most NFL players doing, the retire. Yeah, it's like
Speaker 1: we've had a good run. It's like damn yank Thunder
Speaker 1: from down Under. I've seen that. Have you been to that?
Speaker 1: It's the funniest thing I have ever I know I
Speaker 1: haven't been to it. I will tell you this true
Speaker 1: story and then we'll keep going. I went to the
Speaker 1: Thunder from down Under. Um, when I was on Mad TV.
Speaker 1: We were filming something there and one of the female
Speaker 1: cast members and I dragged there was like a poonhound
Speaker 1: male writer that we dragged with us, and he he
Speaker 1: was a real poonhound and he was so bummed to
Speaker 1: not only be in Vegas and not be at a
Speaker 1: strip club, but to even worse be at the Thunder
Speaker 1: from down Under. And when he so he went in,
Speaker 1: they had no dressing room. He went into the men's
Speaker 1: restroom and the guys were applying their eyeliner in the
Speaker 1: in like the mirror in front of the sink, and
Speaker 1: then one of them made eye contact with him in
Speaker 1: the mirror, made a like like a Macaulaye cockin and
Speaker 1: home alone face. Oh, and then he ran to the
Speaker 1: bathroom and had explosive diarrhea, and then the show started
Speaker 1: and like he came out, it was like grinding so
Speaker 1: like and we knew that like he the guy came back,
Speaker 1: he looked shaken, like our friend looked like shook to
Speaker 1: the core, like like a spider like he'd been at
Speaker 1: a spider hole in Vietnam for like seven years, and
Speaker 1: like a pow had seen some ship. So he told
Speaker 1: us that this guy had just had like the full
Speaker 1: thunder from down Under. In the bathroom, he was grinding
Speaker 1: on some woman was the under the from under from
Speaker 1: down Under, and then the guys kept coming over and
Speaker 1: like rubbing their business like all on my friend, like
Speaker 1: the guys. It was truly, I thought I was going
Speaker 1: I laughed so hard. I thought I was going to
Speaker 1: puncture a reb. It was incredible. Okay, we'll get back
Speaker 1: to the business at hand. Okay, so we get to
Speaker 1: the choke. The choke's happening, and I mean truly I
Speaker 1: was that. He actually was like, okay, you know what,
Speaker 1: like you gotta go. So then they have the two
Speaker 1: on one date, and um, somehow we find out that
Speaker 1: Raven got the group date Roy it's even though nobody
Speaker 1: saw that. So Whitney and as we find out Dilo,
Speaker 1: which we've never they're just talking about it like we
Speaker 1: know that she's de I was gonna say that's been
Speaker 1: dropped before. No, I just feel for Dilo, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: I know, first of all, was anyone absolutely shocked that
Speaker 1: Dilo was on a two and one two on one?
Speaker 1: I thought she was top three or top one. I
Speaker 1: was like, boring, she's hot as fun and was boring.
Speaker 1: But I worried. But we didn't. We all think that
Speaker 1: she'll didn't make it super far. I had. I had
Speaker 1: a portraitist paint her portrait for me. I was so
Speaker 1: confident that she was going to be in the top
Speaker 1: two that she goes from from Danielle to Delo and
Speaker 1: then she has that's what happened fired. That's why I
Speaker 1: would make it to the top ten. You have to
Speaker 1: have a little personality if you could, if you you
Speaker 1: either need to look like Dilo. You gotta have a look.
Speaker 1: I can go coach those girls. I could go in
Speaker 1: and be like a mole and Arlow Arlow. How about
Speaker 1: some knock knock jokes and there Arlow with their bat wings. Okay,
Speaker 1: so they both they both show up in their rompers.
Speaker 1: They're both were in their rompers. Whitney and he said
Speaker 1: this line which made me like like I was about
Speaker 1: to say the grossest thing I've ever said just now,
Speaker 1: and I've said a lot of gross things. Please, I
Speaker 1: was about to say literally as soon as he said this,
Speaker 1: it was like it made there was no moisture left
Speaker 1: in my pagina because it was like it was so disgusting.
Speaker 1: He said, I don't know if you've noticed, but you're
Speaker 1: really beautiful to Whitney. I was just like like, like
Speaker 1: that's the grossest. That is the gross Like, I don't
Speaker 1: know if you've noticed. I don't know if you've noticed,
Speaker 1: but you're really beautiful, like he thought he was nailing
Speaker 1: it with that, like he's so disgusted. Yeah, and John,
Speaker 1: what is a line like that? What is that? John?
Speaker 1: What is that? I don't know? That was just like
Speaker 1: I think he was like, oh man, I just nailed
Speaker 1: it with that one. You know, like like me, like
Speaker 1: I'm amazing. Now I'm gonna tell you you're amazing. And
Speaker 1: now we're in a club together, You're welcome. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1: It's like I'm a douchebag and I throw a douchebag
Speaker 1: line and now and like, how do you see a
Speaker 1: lot of people do that? You see football players say
Speaker 1: terrible things all the time, like drop bad lines right
Speaker 1: like they don't know. Yeah, I like by the pussy
Speaker 1: locker room to locker room talk. It's like I'm the
Speaker 1: most basic. I don't if you've noticed, like you just
Speaker 1: how do you even have a conversation with it? Like
Speaker 1: thank you? Like yeah, I wake up every day to this,
Speaker 1: Yeah I got it? How I feel? God, you say
Speaker 1: that to me all the time? Rock and roll. I
Speaker 1: don't know if you've noticed, you got a face it's
Speaker 1: pretty female set your real face. You're just about to
Speaker 1: get cut. Vanessa is back there. She's worried about dil
Speaker 1: somehow Vanessa's back at the Marryott locked back up in
Speaker 1: her tower at the Marriott, worried about Dilo and Nick.
Speaker 1: So he he cuts, he cuts Whitney and the glare
Speaker 1: she like. I appreciated her stony silence of like, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna just make this awkward. I'm not going to fill
Speaker 1: this air like you're cutting me. And he was like,
Speaker 1: so I just I want to get to be the
Speaker 1: road so I can get out. Like the stony silence.
Speaker 1: I know, she didn't say a word. I loved it,
Speaker 1: but you know, made him talk himself out of it. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I thought that was a great moment. I also thought,
Speaker 1: have we seen her complete a sentence this season? No, No,
Speaker 1: I'm not. Yea, I did. Steve had a huge crush
Speaker 1: on her. He was so but you know what she's
Speaker 1: I don't. She got stranded on an eyelid, which I
Speaker 1: always love when they get stranded and I bad lands, Yeah,
Speaker 1: to take off on a plane and they like flashback
Speaker 1: with like twenty behind like a cupcake when he got
Speaker 1: stranded on the cliff. And you know, I do think
Speaker 1: Olivia by that blowhole when it was like terrible weather
Speaker 1: and it was like it was like blowing off like Geyser's. Yeah,
Speaker 1: this one was like the helicopter was like blowing sand.
Speaker 1: And when I really wrote down, I hope, I hope
Speaker 1: she doesn't have context. Yeah, that was that right in
Speaker 1: the eyeballs. And then they sent a man p a
Speaker 1: to go get her suitcase. They left her on the
Speaker 1: island and and so there with Dilo and they have
Speaker 1: a connection. And she said, we have a connection. Okay,
Speaker 1: So Dilo says, you know what, he made the right decision.
Speaker 1: We have a connection and what we have is amazing,
Speaker 1: and it's something most people never feel. When people say
Speaker 1: ship like that, it's like you mean like horny nous
Speaker 1: and one evening of like getting grinded by I think
Speaker 1: most people probably felt that once, like you, Yeah, people
Speaker 1: have never felt like this before, Like you guys have
Speaker 1: known each other for three weeks. Yeah, yeah, they've hung
Speaker 1: out with each other for a period of sixteen now, yeah,
Speaker 1: I know you guys all better from watching the show
Speaker 1: every week. Then you know each other trying a gay lady,
Speaker 1: you can get married after three nights, lazy. So they
Speaker 1: go on their date and it's like, you know, okay,
Speaker 1: so this must have been on Reality Steve. But as
Speaker 1: when you host a podcast about the Bachelor, people email
Speaker 1: you thinks about the Bachelor. So they said, when Nick
Speaker 1: and Dilo were on their their their second date where
Speaker 1: they went and slow danced in a barn to some
Speaker 1: no name country singer um, apparently her top kept falling.
Speaker 1: Apparently her dressing it was like the deep, like her
Speaker 1: tips kept falling out, and they had to keep stopping
Speaker 1: for production because her boobs kept falling out. And I
Speaker 1: feel like they were referencing it when they're like that
Speaker 1: was so crazy, They're like, yeah, that was pretty crazy.
Speaker 1: And then and then she said, I hope I didn't
Speaker 1: flash everyone on stage. And it's like because she apparently
Speaker 1: because people like I guess who were there, who had
Speaker 1: been there, They said they were there at the taping.
Speaker 1: They had to watch this like fake country star. They said,
Speaker 1: she kept flashing everyone. And so but then they kept
Speaker 1: saying like when you so this is your second date,
Speaker 1: when you keep the only thing you have to connect
Speaker 1: over is like, boy, that first day that was crazy. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was a crazy so awkward. Why do you like,
Speaker 1: why do you actually have make a new memory instead
Speaker 1: of bonding one date where your boobs came out, and
Speaker 1: then we said two words of what you wanted to
Speaker 1: be my whole time favorite moments in any bachelor and
Speaker 1: he said it was so awkward, adventurous and raw even
Speaker 1: but after she said love and honesty, she said, he
Speaker 1: looked at her like she was crap. Yes, that's that's
Speaker 1: that's how you got that. She lost him like her
Speaker 1: answer of love and honesty, and he said adventurous and raw,
Speaker 1: raw raw dog paused, and I was laughing so hard.
Speaker 1: At first, I thought he was going to be like, no, shit,
Speaker 1: love and honesty, you're so boring. But the adventurous and
Speaker 1: raw the response, you think someone wrote those answers for him.
Speaker 1: That's how he likes Kurd. Then we all decided what
Speaker 1: were what would our two words be? Did you play
Speaker 1: that game? Right after that? What good? We were coming
Speaker 1: up with some really are yours. We were coming up
Speaker 1: with like radic, smoke and mirrors, Oh my god, slightly violent,
Speaker 1: which is coming up with the world is like salty, salty,
Speaker 1: the world's worst words? What erratic assault, erratic crazy and
Speaker 1: stuck that suffocating Oh my god, yeah, yeah, needy, needy, jealous,
Speaker 1: just like up and down, just really a word break, violating,
Speaker 1: violating and tea bagging, cavern loose knee caps and jealousy
Speaker 1: out the most world's worst phrases, Oh what a man?
Speaker 1: And dad Dad Dockers pleaded jeans jeans and lost weekends
Speaker 1: at sandals. Just just just no, just like everything everything's
Speaker 1: nothing is off limits, needy and poorly dressed, jealous, rageful, rateful,
Speaker 1: love and honesty. So then he cuts Dilo. He cuts
Speaker 1: Delo afterwards like you didn't it was when she was
Speaker 1: like it almost reminds me of was it Caitlin? The
Speaker 1: second anybody would say I love you? Should cut them?
Speaker 1: Was it Caitlin who did the gout show I am
Speaker 1: your gucco? Or is that Joo? That was Jojo and
Speaker 1: alex so Jojo. Every time somebody would tell Jojo they
Speaker 1: loved her, she would cut them. So it seems like
Speaker 1: the second she said I love you, you could see
Speaker 1: is like a like mad ma face. That doesn't it
Speaker 1: doesn't fit in with my rawness that yeah, you're coming
Speaker 1: in soft and fragile. She was of bare back and raw,
Speaker 1: like probably going to get her beat. He she was
Speaker 1: the hottest one there, Like I think he was like
Speaker 1: you were my pick. I wanted it to be you
Speaker 1: and basically like you were just so boring. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: you're right. I think that's what led him to tears,
Speaker 1: because I think he picked her, literally to tears. She
Speaker 1: did it, she made it happen. You're loving honesty brought
Speaker 1: me to tears. Tears because she was that first date,
Speaker 1: she was so boring. But I was like, Okay, she's
Speaker 1: just nervous, she's on TV, she's in his hometown, she's nervous.
Speaker 1: This second date when all she can do is that
Speaker 1: was pretty crazy crazy. I tears, Kate. I was very surprised,
Speaker 1: and I was trying to figure out what was the
Speaker 1: moment that he flipped like, because watching it, I was like,
Speaker 1: what happened though it was someone's, she's it was somewhere
Speaker 1: when she kind of said like she's falling for him,
Speaker 1: and he just was like oh, but then he just
Speaker 1: had a full un mental break. Yeah, jazz Ja. He's like,
Speaker 1: I was choking myself out of here, choke myself. I'm
Speaker 1: choking it out my own chokie. So then I wrote
Speaker 1: down at you raw dog. So then so then he
Speaker 1: goes back. He storms straight to the Marriott. The reef,
Speaker 1: the Merriott reef. He didn't even knock. He just flew in,
Speaker 1: bored to cheers, crying and all I wrote down because
Speaker 1: our first season, Eddie, we forced Eddie Peppertone to watch it.
Speaker 1: He'd never seen it. He went the whole season. He hated.
Speaker 1: I wrote, Eddie Peppertone would kill himself, like right now,
Speaker 1: and then I ended it with writing, Dolphin better be
Speaker 1: in paradise. That was my final word. Dolphin, guys. I
Speaker 1: mean it was. It was like that crying, My god.
Speaker 1: That's when I was like, I'm done. Like I still
Speaker 1: I'm still in it, but I made those women I
Speaker 1: feel like pieces of ship. Yeah, for no reason, for
Speaker 1: no reason, they're there. He was like, you know what,
Speaker 1: I'm not having any feelings for anyone. It's all your fault.
Speaker 1: Honestly discussed that I ever wanted to fuck him, like
Speaker 1: I thought he was real hot and I totally wanted
Speaker 1: to funk up. And now I'm just like, oh God,
Speaker 1: you almost got to pass him your boyfriend to try
Speaker 1: to go on this season. The least she did. At
Speaker 1: least you've taken it back now. Your power, you're you're
Speaker 1: adventurous and raw in your own terms. Yeah, that was rude.
Speaker 1: It was rude. And now we're all freaking out and
Speaker 1: the current is going to go like she's like, let
Speaker 1: me put on my trench coat, you guys, and they
Speaker 1: don't get my to get my bounce out out and
Speaker 1: we're gonna see I mean, she's going to go fuck him.
Speaker 1: And then we all we know is at some point
Speaker 1: they go to the north that he's the fantasy sweets
Speaker 1: are somewhere up in the Northern Lights area. It's like
Speaker 1: Regina in a worse place. There are days in and
Speaker 1: everyone would scream. He'd be like, you guys, ready, we're
Speaker 1: going to go to the days in and Regina. And
Speaker 1: they'd be like, oh my god, I've always wanted to
Speaker 1: go to the days in Regina. It's amazing. This one
Speaker 1: is so great. They have washed vets, watched their They
Speaker 1: definitely don't want guys. What's it okay? So where are
Speaker 1: we at now? We have left? We have Raven, we
Speaker 1: have Orphan, we have what's her name, Christina, I have
Speaker 1: my family. We have I mean, we have this fla
Speaker 1: or cinnamon tastes like lips stick in my youth. It's
Speaker 1: my only accident. I love it. We have, we have
Speaker 1: the nest. Where's your's mind? I have been so patient.
Speaker 1: I have been as my French Canadians. I mean no,
Speaker 1: I have been so patient, and here I am. I've
Speaker 1: been with these like the Russians. I've been waiting patients
Speaker 1: like you waiting for food for some people and then
Speaker 1: you eat me. My students made a book for you,
Speaker 1: and they are saying, Miss Vanisa is my students made
Speaker 1: a book for you. What's the definition of book? I
Speaker 1: never read? I hate lips. We have a Vanessa and
Speaker 1: Russian face off. We have Rachel, whose dad is a
Speaker 1: federal judge who would grab Nick by his adventurous rob
Speaker 1: all Texas federal judge. I'm waiting for Vanessa to cut herself.
Speaker 1: I think he's gonna. I don't know. That's when keeps
Speaker 1: threatening I feel, I mean, I don't know if she'll
Speaker 1: do it, because I feel like she's gonna keep like
Speaker 1: thinking about it and then just running down, bouncing around
Speaker 1: on beach volleyball like. I think she's got to keep
Speaker 1: like losing herself, like she's gonna start to and then
Speaker 1: not get it back. But I keep what it would
Speaker 1: be so good if she was like you, know what,
Speaker 1: You're so fucking full of shit. I'm out of here.
Speaker 1: Ever done that? Um, somebody did in the first season
Speaker 1: with Caitlin and that guy left to go get the
Speaker 1: other girl, the guy who was pretty gay who left
Speaker 1: to go be with the girl that who was the
Speaker 1: one that cried, and they got to pick the two.
Speaker 1: There was Kay and there was the other girl. Oh
Speaker 1: he went yeah, Bree and then he he was like
Speaker 1: a country music singer who was like Luke. But didn't
Speaker 1: Jade leave or not Jade um Grace the grant and
Speaker 1: late Lace. Didn't she leave because she was like yeah,
Speaker 1: she quoted her own tattoo. If you can't love it yourself,
Speaker 1: at least tapped out that I'm going to do fift.
Speaker 1: I just learned about buis voting under the influence. Did
Speaker 1: you know you can get a buy? Yeah, that's exciting.
Speaker 1: I'm not leaving Paradise until I get a buy. Okay,
Speaker 1: wait a minute, you guys, I didn't We didn't discuss
Speaker 1: last week. I just want to say we forgot to
Speaker 1: discuss because we got we had a seventy eight hour
Speaker 1: marathon talking about Karn and Taylor. But I we didn't
Speaker 1: discuss the fact that Raven told him she was in
Speaker 1: love with she let it slip last time. Oh yes, yes,
Speaker 1: but he he didn't run away then. But the way
Speaker 1: she said it was like a little more like it
Speaker 1: was like I'm in love with you. It's like, oh
Speaker 1: I love you, Like it was more like that wasn't
Speaker 1: the moment I fell in love with you. She did
Speaker 1: say it was, but he's always pretended like yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: dang it, Russian, I just say it again. I was
Speaker 1: loving Rachel, and so I was like, I don't want
Speaker 1: any of these girls to be the bachelorette. I want
Speaker 1: Rachel'll be the next bachelorette, and I want the orphan
Speaker 1: to be with Nick because he's got a lot of siblings.
Speaker 1: Oh that's good, or it's never gonna happen. They have
Speaker 1: nothing and they have nothing. No, I don't. I just
Speaker 1: I rarely have seen a show where like they're six
Speaker 1: left right now, where I can't see them him with
Speaker 1: any of them. I know. That's what he said at
Speaker 1: the end. Yeah, maybe I wonder if he's not gonna
Speaker 1: maybe he doesn't pick anyone. Think you know what this
Speaker 1: is like when I tapped out because I took like
Speaker 1: a ten year break from this after Jen Cheff said,
Speaker 1: I choose not to choose. He better choose somebody. He
Speaker 1: better pick somebody. Yeah, just they'll just be like tough
Speaker 1: out for a couple of months. But he do you
Speaker 1: think is the best fit? I mean, I was thinking Vanessa,
Speaker 1: but now it's like I thought it was Dealo the
Speaker 1: whole time. I don't. I think Vanessa's way too smart
Speaker 1: for ven ven Um. Yeah, like Raven Raven is great. Okay,
Speaker 1: I am going to I can't get online. I was
Speaker 1: going to read something is there is there? Is it
Speaker 1: different down here? Do you want us to create the emails? Okay?
Speaker 1: Here we go. Okay, whoa, it's for us from Russia.
Speaker 1: Love your show? Hello, get reception. If she doesn't get picked,
Speaker 1: she could go on ninety fiance. What what what? What's nance?
Speaker 1: It's the best show ever, Little slice of Heaven? Yeah?
Speaker 1: What channel? It's Annie? Yeah? Annie? I think I don't know.
Speaker 1: I just watched it just TVR and it's a you know,
Speaker 1: they it's usually like like there's usually a creepy older
Speaker 1: guy that like got like a nineteen year old from
Speaker 1: Russia's pretty creepy overall. Yeah, but then there's some that
Speaker 1: seem actually in love and it's like a couple who
Speaker 1: the guy, the man or woman is from another country
Speaker 1: and they have ninety days to get married and then
Speaker 1: that's along the fiance a visa. Last four we were
Speaker 1: on could have been watching I watched a movie about
Speaker 1: I watched a movie about it about like guys like
Speaker 1: going to a Russia and there was a few that
Speaker 1: actually like to go buy their brides, and there was
Speaker 1: a few that actually seemed like they fell in love.
Speaker 1: There was something that fall in love. And there's like
Speaker 1: the one guy remember the Russian girl and the guy
Speaker 1: that was like the girl was super young and he
Speaker 1: was like what he used to blow a train whistle
Speaker 1: to wake her up. What he was like like like
Speaker 1: everyone's dad. He's like you're he's like her old enough
Speaker 1: to way her way beyond being her dad. And he
Speaker 1: would wake her up in the morning with her with
Speaker 1: a train whistle. And then if she was having her monthly,
Speaker 1: he would make her sleep in another room because she
Speaker 1: gets moody during her monthly. Other than that's like that's
Speaker 1: the old episode. You don't have to watch that one grows. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I am going to you guys, help us pick the
Speaker 1: tweeter of the week. And by the way, we're in
Speaker 1: a new studio right now, so I can't read the emails,
Speaker 1: but we we got so many good ones this week
Speaker 1: and I'm going to read them next week. And I
Speaker 1: appreciate you guys emailing and Rose Podcast at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: We really appreciate. We got so many great comments on
Speaker 1: iTunes which I also can't read for your show, Beautiful
Speaker 1: Loaf of Bread. But we will do a tweet of
Speaker 1: the week. Will you guys like to vote on our
Speaker 1: Twitter of the week? So we um so email us
Speaker 1: at Rose Podcast at Gmail. Like us on iTunes and Facebook.
Speaker 1: We appreciate your comments and um tweet to us at
Speaker 1: hashtag w y a t R. Here we go. This
Speaker 1: is from Snickers chill Opa. Okay, eron Folly. If Nick
Speaker 1: was a care bear, his tummy symbol would be a
Speaker 1: crying boner. That's good. Says that at Basebone one. And
Speaker 1: I don't think he's one one yet this year? Okay,
Speaker 1: he has he did this year. Okay. This fake st
Speaker 1: Thomas interview backdrop sure is stretching this show's budget. There
Speaker 1: was one where they were outside that it just feel
Speaker 1: like they had like a photo and like a photo
Speaker 1: of like a harbor um. Okay, this is from Sarah
Speaker 1: the Pearl Vegas con Sara. His name is now Nick?
Speaker 1: Can I walk you out via al like that? Like
Speaker 1: that Alex Jaffee at a Jeffe three. I'm here for
Speaker 1: the bloopers of jasmine poisoning everyone. Yes, that was good.
Speaker 1: That's really good. Wait was there something at the end
Speaker 1: she was trying to make everybody eat like chit chocolate.
Speaker 1: That's right, Oh my god, Jill Hammond's at Hammond's. Jill,
Speaker 1: how did lose a guy in one date? Tell him
Speaker 1: you want to choke him out? Hashtag note to sell.
Speaker 1: That's very good. All right, So it feels like our
Speaker 1: top two is how to lose a guy one day?
Speaker 1: Tell me you want to choke him out? Not to self.
Speaker 1: And I'm here for the bloopers of jasmine poisoning everyone? Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: which one do you like? The boner on the belly? Okay,
Speaker 1: and so we have. If Nick was a Carabers, tell
Speaker 1: me symbol would be a crying boner. Yeah, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: do bloopers. I'm gonna go bloopers here because that looked
Speaker 1: like that at the end. Okay, I like the crying
Speaker 1: boner ca Okay, it looks like bloopers runs. We have.
Speaker 1: Runner up is runner Up is at Snicker's choloopa. If
Speaker 1: Nick was a Carbery's tell me simbol will be a
Speaker 1: crying boner. But the winner of the Tweet of the
Speaker 1: Week is Alex Jaffee at a Jaffee three. I'm here
Speaker 1: for the bloopers of Jasmine poisoning everyone. We will be
Speaker 1: back at our usual Wednesday. So I hope you enjoyed
Speaker 1: your double Bonus episodes this week that you got to
Speaker 1: their one because I was busy with Billy Ray Cyrus,
Speaker 1: trying to get my way into the Cyrus empire as
Speaker 1: you do lovely? Can I just say he's handsome and
Speaker 1: lovely and he made Miley Cyrus. Miley is a good one.
Speaker 1: He's low key hot. He's hot, and I look at
Speaker 1: him and looking at him, he's I feel like he's
Speaker 1: gotten better with time. I feel like I'm into two
Speaker 1: thousand seventeen Billy right like I look at him, I'm like,
Speaker 1: you're a hunky man. I have to google image. I
Speaker 1: have not I can't even he's like a man. He's
Speaker 1: like a real man. He's like you can't get like
Speaker 1: the breaking He's like Smoky at a Bear. He's like
Speaker 1: he's like Burt Reynolds, like in his like playgirl like
Speaker 1: he's like a sexy man the rock on the m Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: alright guys, Sarah, John, do you have anything you want
Speaker 1: to promote coming off? Yes, Yankee. Yeah, it's seven years
Speaker 1: from from Frogina, Regina. We actually I am going to
Speaker 1: do a show in Portland Valentine's Day Park Theater, and
Speaker 1: John's gonna be with me. We're gonna do like a
Speaker 1: Q and A and in meet and Greek. That's fun. Yeah.
Speaker 1: The theater, the Newmark Theater. Seahawks Country up there so
Speaker 1: they can also meet John after. So it's going to
Speaker 1: be that's fun. Dream team, Go Hawks, the Go Hawks,
Speaker 1: and I will be football. I have stuff coming up,
Speaker 1: but not for a little bit. I'm going to Canada.
Speaker 1: I just played Vancouver. I'm going to be doing Yuck
Speaker 1: Yucks in Calgary. Is a good crowd, is it? You've
Speaker 1: done yuck X Calgary? First of all, the owners of
Speaker 1: Yuck y X Calgary, Yeah, are some of the coolest people,
Speaker 1: really like well run cool club. I thought the same
Speaker 1: about Vancouver. Yeah, the Couve. Yeah, they're a big good
Speaker 1: Packers fans. I relayed everything back to sports. I don't
Speaker 1: know what the pack but there what do they play?
Speaker 1: What sport is that? They're a gymnastics squad? Did to
Speaker 1: yourself assholes? Oh my god what she called it? Last week?
Speaker 1: It was like this frantic thing, as if I knew
Speaker 1: what she was talking about. She was like, there was
Speaker 1: a guy. He had eighty cats. There's eighty cats, any
Speaker 1: cats there at the shelter. I'm on my way to
Speaker 1: the shelter after the eye doctor. It was like this
Speaker 1: frantic I'm like, Mom, I'm in the middle of the podcast,
Speaker 1: like there's a man with eighty cats. And she called
Speaker 1: me the next day She's like, it's a good thing
Speaker 1: I got Mittens when I did, because I went back
Speaker 1: to pick up Mints. The other seventy nine cats were gone.
Speaker 1: They moved on the shelter on the cape. The Cape.
Speaker 1: Some shelter on the Cape ran out of cats, and
Speaker 1: they stole all the cats except for four bitten felt
Speaker 1: like living with my mom pour Mittens. I'm like, I
Speaker 1: know Mittens is nove with Jannumery and she's falling around
Speaker 1: the house. Mittens, that's a good thing. Nim does won't
Speaker 1: eat anything yet? Is that bad? That's normal? I don't
Speaker 1: think that's normal. Three days all right? I don't know
Speaker 1: she's had like two bites. Maybe she's just like, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's how you do it. Ladies and gentlemen. We will
Speaker 1: be here next week, you know what. The world may
Speaker 1: be falling apart, but we will be in Regina and
Speaker 1: we will be at Britney Spears. You guys, truly, this
Speaker 1: is the only thing that means anything to me anymore
Speaker 1: in my life. I don't know anything about anything else,
Speaker 1: but I do know that I love all of you. Katie,
Speaker 1: Do you have one final thing? We want to close
Speaker 1: out the show? Um? I have a question for John.
Speaker 1: Are there other NFL players that watch The Bachelor? You
Speaker 1: don't have to say names if they know there's a lot?
Speaker 1: Are there? Yeah, there's a lot. It is often like
Speaker 1: the after practice talk in the sauna among guys. We
Speaker 1: talked about The Bachelor all the time. I love that.
Speaker 1: That's real room talk right back, Like, I don't know
Speaker 1: because we haven't really been back since Nick, Like we
Speaker 1: kind of lost out a month ago. So Nick was
Speaker 1: just getting going. I don't. I don't think any of
Speaker 1: them want to do anything bad to print or good.
Speaker 1: But someone find that harm to believe. I've had a
Speaker 1: couple of glasses of one. I was like, like a banger. Yeah,
Speaker 1: why you'd want to like have sex of No talking though,
Speaker 1: oh god, no talking, no talking, just choking. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: do want to feel good. Okay, what's your question? That's
Speaker 1: a little forward? Wait where are your hands around my neck?
Speaker 1: I thought we were something fun playing volleyball. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm allergic to rules. How was it wasn't like for
Speaker 1: you in Russia? Oh? I didn't see Rose Till like
Speaker 1: him to America. Nothing blooms now leaving notice to dot
Speaker 1: com what you