Speaker 1: There we go.
Speaker 2: I think we're both supposed to clap though, right, Oh,
Speaker 2: isn't it I think it's to sink our sound.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, so should we start?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's for the editor so that when we clap,
Speaker 2: they know, like, now start from here?
Speaker 1: Ready? One? Two?
Speaker 2: Three?
Speaker 1: All right? Oh? I feel very technical?
Speaker 2: Now what did you think I was doing this whole time?
Speaker 1: Though? Just I thought you were because that was how
Speaker 1: I for me. I just thought for me because I
Speaker 1: can't perform like you know, I need an action or
Speaker 1: a something otherwise. I'm like, have we started? Have we not?
Speaker 1: Are we recording? Are we not? So I thought you
Speaker 1: were doing it just for me, So me in my
Speaker 1: Pavlovian response, I can be like, I'm on now, I'm
Speaker 1: here jazz, but I didn't.
Speaker 2: Know you're no, it was actually it was yeah, No,
Speaker 2: that's like a yeah, that's why they do the clapboard
Speaker 2: like clap or sound.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's the same sort of thing. But that's okay.
Speaker 2: You can keep thinking I'm doing it for you, and
Speaker 2: I now will just be doing it for you.
Speaker 1: Well, now I have to do it with you because
Speaker 1: it's it's actually a useful technique.
Speaker 2: It's actually right it's actually there's a purpose to it
Speaker 2: other than me just randomly clapping at things.
Speaker 1: So have you been in a CBS lately or any
Speaker 1: sort of pharmacicle place. I have poor k por k
Speaker 1: because I went yesterday and I haven't been inside a
Speaker 1: CVS in a long time because I'll either order stuff
Speaker 1: online or just do the drive through if I'm picking
Speaker 1: up prescriptions or whatever. But I try to do like
Speaker 1: like a couple of days a week. Probably feels like.
Speaker 2: Oh really okay, No, I try to And there's one
Speaker 2: right by my house, and I have two teenage girls
Speaker 2: who are like, I need nail polish. My underreye thing
Speaker 2: is caking. I run out of powder, I need face wipes,
Speaker 2: I need my cellar water.
Speaker 1: You know. Oh that's Target. CBS's that's Target. That's where like, yeah,
Speaker 1: Felicity needs like a weekly trip to replenish all of
Speaker 1: her skincare and all of the things. Yes, but she
Speaker 1: now has the cold that I had a couple of
Speaker 1: weeks ago. So I had, yeah, my kids are sick
Speaker 1: now to yeah, what is going on with like there's
Speaker 1: something going around trying to avoid it though, So I
Speaker 1: went into a CBS to get her some medicinal things.
Speaker 1: I was like, this is great because I need deodorant.
Speaker 1: So I'm just going to go to the deodorant aisle
Speaker 1: and pick out a deodorant. While I'm here, the entire
Speaker 1: deodorant aisle is under lock and key. Now most yeah,
Speaker 1: a lot of things. I thought that was just alcohol
Speaker 1: and then niquill because people were doing bad things with niquil,
Speaker 1: But now it's the entire deodorant now.
Speaker 2: So it's because, uh, yeah, there is a fair amount
Speaker 2: of shoplifting that goes on, but it is also in
Speaker 2: I mean, I have my own thoughts on it, because
Speaker 2: it's in large response to the fact that everyday items
Speaker 2: and the cost of living is so incredibly expensive that
Speaker 2: and so much profit is made by these corporations off
Speaker 2: of things that we can't afford necessities, and so people
Speaker 2: who can't even afford homes are like, why the hell
Speaker 2: am I gonna pay for seventeen dollars for a deodorant
Speaker 2: and they take them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.
Speaker 2: While I don't, uh, you know, I am not a
Speaker 2: person who takes part in stealing myself, I sometimes understand
Speaker 2: the desire to screw big corporations for overcharging people for
Speaker 2: basic necessities.
Speaker 1: Yeah, anyway, I.
Speaker 2: Wasn't thinking, but yeah it is because it's also you
Speaker 2: don't get charged like misdemeter crimes and stuff of theft
Speaker 2: is just not it's like such a drain worth on
Speaker 2: court systems, and they're so backed up anyway that a
Speaker 2: lot of it doesn't necessarily get prosecuted. So it's kind
Speaker 2: of like if you take you know, whatever, less than
Speaker 2: five hundred dollars, like nobody's gonna stop you. So now
Speaker 2: they've started putting things under lock and key so that
Speaker 2: that happens a.
Speaker 1: Little bit less. Okay, Yeah, I was. I was shocked
Speaker 1: because I was like when did we start? Like even
Speaker 1: the all natural deodorant that doesn't work, like even that's
Speaker 1: under lock and key, and so I was like why.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I was talking to my friends Katie and
Speaker 1: Angela and Andrea her name is Andrea too about this
Speaker 1: of like venting. I'm like why, like why I can't
Speaker 1: even get and I couldn't even get like an associate
Speaker 1: to come over and unlock the deodorant cabinet right.
Speaker 2: Well, because there's no one working at the stores because
Speaker 2: they also pay them, like and so why would anyone
Speaker 2: want to work in retail and at a pharmacy when
Speaker 2: everyone's yelling at them and they're trying to unlocked seventeen cabinets.
Speaker 1: No, this has led to a whole like the soapbox
Speaker 1: moment for you. But I was talking about with my
Speaker 1: friends too.
Speaker 2: And they were like, yeah, sorry, yeah, this is my I.
Speaker 1: Didn't think of, like the shoplifting perspective.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the basic things like that that people can't afford,
Speaker 2: or that they're like, look I I need this, and
Speaker 2: like we you know, they.
Speaker 1: They take it. Yeah, and there's like that's why I
Speaker 1: think a lot of kids don't go to high school. Well,
Speaker 1: not just people who are ditching, but like the deodor
Speaker 1: because they're stilling deodor, No, because they die. They can't
Speaker 1: wash their clothes and they can't y are so conscious
Speaker 1: about how they smell. Very true, they can't. Yeah they're donnerant.
Speaker 2: So yep, it's been a huge Yeah, it is a
Speaker 2: huge problem.
Speaker 1: And uh, you know, I have.
Speaker 2: A lot of friends that do some really incredible work
Speaker 2: with the unhouse community, and I know that there's a
Speaker 2: lot of issues and there's a lot of things that
Speaker 2: people disagree with, but I just think that.
Speaker 1: In so many ways.
Speaker 2: Living is unaffordable for most people these days, and somebody's
Speaker 2: making money on all this stuff, and it certainly is
Speaker 2: not the people who are trying to steal the deodor
Speaker 2: So anyway.
Speaker 1: Well, my friend Katie had a great idea. She said,
Speaker 1: whenever there's a food drive in her neighborhood that's not
Speaker 1: just food, she'll donate like hygiene items or pads or
Speaker 1: tampons or things. Are huge. I never thought of that.
Speaker 2: Be and her Girl Scout Troupe did a whole event
Speaker 2: for something called Sisters in the Streets, which is an
Speaker 2: organization that provides menstrual products for free to women who
Speaker 2: are unhoused or can't otherwise afford them, or who are
Speaker 2: in low come, low income areas.
Speaker 1: Because there's also such.
Speaker 2: An incredible tax placed on feminine care items that is
Speaker 2: not taxed. Uh, even our razors are taxed differently than
Speaker 2: men's razors.
Speaker 1: Yeah, the pink tax.
Speaker 2: Yeah, all women's deodorant is taxed differently, women's razors, shaving cream,
Speaker 2: anything that's called the pink tax, anything that's geared towards
Speaker 2: women is uh automatically taxed and usually costs much more.
Speaker 1: Dang, wow, see this is this is you came for
Speaker 1: full house people, Fanarito, you should.
Speaker 2: Always, like always buy men's razors. They tend to be
Speaker 2: much sharper and better quality for.
Speaker 1: Much less money. Okay, good to know. There you go.
Speaker 2: All right, they might not be pink, but I think
Speaker 2: you know, I.
Speaker 1: Don't need a ok I don't look at the color
Speaker 1: of my razors. So yeah, anyway, that's uh, there you go.
Speaker 1: There's a lesson for the day, folks. Cut up. That's
Speaker 1: why your deodorant is under lock and key along revenucular codes.
Speaker 1: And uh, donate to your local food banks all lots
Speaker 1: of high HIGI yeah, don't it to your local food banks.
Speaker 2: And uh yeah, and call your representatives because life is
Speaker 2: too expensive.
Speaker 1: Yeah, excellent. All right, well on that note.
Speaker 2: Well, on that note, let's uh, let's get into three
Speaker 2: fun we're starting season three. No, I can't believe it
Speaker 2: starting it in a big way. I did not remember
Speaker 2: that this was the opener to season.
Speaker 1: Three, the whole episode. I never would have guessed that.
Speaker 1: I would think it'd be much further into the into
Speaker 1: season three, like Sweeps week, you know, in May, one
Speaker 1: of the last episodes es usually when they saved these episodes.
Speaker 1: We were really trying to get them in. Goa or
Speaker 1: go Yeah, exactly. Oh, it's a big one. It's a
Speaker 1: big one. And I've got a lot of thoughts about it.
Speaker 2: It was so fun, but I actually have a lot
Speaker 2: of thoughts about it, A lot of thoughts.
Speaker 1: I cannot wait to talk about it. Well, let's get
Speaker 1: into it. Welcome back to How Rude Tanneritos. I'm Andrea
Speaker 1: Barber and I'm Jodie Sweeten, and today we're discussing season three,
Speaker 1: episode one, titled Tanner Island. It originally aired on September
Speaker 1: twenty second, nineteen eighty nine, and it goes a little
Speaker 1: something like this. The family takes a vacation trip to Hawaii.
Speaker 1: What more do you need to know? You don't, don't
Speaker 1: worry about the details. It was directed by Billy fausta
Speaker 1: Coffee Coffee and written by Jeff Franklin. And we have
Speaker 1: three guest stars this week. We have Gail Anne Paolo
Speaker 1: as Leilani, Charlene Polo as Alana, and Israel Weary Hannah
Speaker 1: as the Warrior. So this is their only appearance on
Speaker 1: television ever, right, I don't know if it was.
Speaker 2: They again just went out there crimes and careers even
Speaker 2: when we traveled.
Speaker 1: I'm interested in how they they casted these these individuals.
Speaker 1: If it was when we were already there in Hawaii
Speaker 1: and they were like, hey, let's interview some locals and
Speaker 1: put them on TV.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, because they would be local hires. They're not
Speaker 2: going to fly somebody out from LA to do that.
Speaker 1: So yeah, although one of the hires, one of the
Speaker 1: guys at the end, has like a New Zealand accent,
Speaker 1: so I'm like, oh.
Speaker 2: Well that's I mean, there's probably a fair amount of
Speaker 2: New Zealanders at uh, Pacific Islanders are in that area.
Speaker 2: So yeah, okay, so that does make Zeeland Australia great.
Speaker 2: And a fun fact, I was originally supposed to be
Speaker 2: in this episode.
Speaker 1: Kimmy I was in it, and the night before we
Speaker 1: were to depart for Hawaii, a producer called up and
Speaker 1: said the episode is too long, we have to cut
Speaker 1: Kimmy out. And instead of being devastated, I don't even
Speaker 1: know who that. I'm trying to remember who this was.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't think it was Jeff. I think
Speaker 1: it was a producer like Phyllis Nelson. Phyllis, she was
Speaker 1: in charge.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, So Phyllis called and said, you know what, we
Speaker 1: already bought the tickets. We already have your hotel room reserved.
Speaker 1: Please come with us anyways and just hang out by
Speaker 1: the pool and you don't have to work. And I
Speaker 1: was like, yes, yep, so yeah you did, and we
Speaker 1: have your yep, we have Oh my gosh, we have
Speaker 1: so many fun stories and so many pictures, so many
Speaker 1: fun stories. Slim Slim the frog. Oh yeah, we got
Speaker 1: to pull out the pictures of us. Yeah, Slim the Frog.
Speaker 2: Oh, I've been looking for that picture and I can't
Speaker 2: find him. I haven't Slimmed the frog that we It
Speaker 2: was a terrible It was a frog that had met
Speaker 2: a very untimely end. A smash frog, but a smash frog.
Speaker 2: But he was making this funny little sort of tango dance,
Speaker 2: and and that became a stupid little running joke that
Speaker 2: we have.
Speaker 1: I have a picture of us doing the pose in Hawaii. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I have a picture of us doing the pose
Speaker 1: at my wedding, Like we posed this Slim at my wedding.
Speaker 1: And yeah, but I don't know if I have a
Speaker 1: picture of the actual frog.
Speaker 2: I have a picture of Slim have it. Okay, there,
Speaker 2: I have a picture of Slim. Okay, that is your
Speaker 2: that's your home stuff.
Speaker 1: I well, I mean, does anybody need to see a lattin? Yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's he's our muse, Like, were sure it's not.
Speaker 2: I mean you can't really tell. It looks like is
Speaker 2: that a dried leaf or is that you know what
Speaker 2: I mean, it's not.
Speaker 1: No, I didn't think it was grassy. No, it's not.
Speaker 1: It's just it was a thing that happened. And I
Speaker 1: don't know why.
Speaker 2: It struck us as funny because he was in as
Speaker 2: strange little pose and so that was.
Speaker 1: Just because we were little kids. We were like, this
Speaker 1: is so oh funny. Became the running our lives.
Speaker 2: This episode was our first big travel episode together.
Speaker 1: Right, we left the stage, which is you should never
Speaker 1: leave the stage, and the sitcom should never leave the stage.
Speaker 2: It's always a disaster. We are a very well oiled
Speaker 2: machine when inside of a sound stage and you take
Speaker 2: us out and everyone goes.
Speaker 1: Yeah, everyone loses their mind and everything goes wrong.
Speaker 2: Yeah, a few of the things that went wrong. One
Speaker 2: of the biggest things that went wrong. Just as a
Speaker 2: note to give you an overall background as to what
Speaker 2: was happening while we shot this episode. Within the first
Speaker 2: few days of being there, Jeff Franklin, who is an
Speaker 2: avid tennis player and loves to play tennis, was on
Speaker 2: the court and tore his achilles tendon, which is the
Speaker 2: tendon that connects your foot to the back of your calf.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it's an important one.
Speaker 2: It's an important one. You can't walk without it, and
Speaker 2: it's really painful if you snap it. And he managed
Speaker 2: to snap it, like within the first few days we
Speaker 2: got there. So he was now in a wheelchair and
Speaker 2: on copious amounts of pain medics the whole time that uh,
Speaker 2: that he was there trying.
Speaker 1: To do the show and unbelievable.
Speaker 2: This is also in the days before cell phones. Oh yeah,
Speaker 2: and uh, one day we uh, we're all told to
Speaker 2: go to one beach and uh the crew was actually
Speaker 2: at another beach and those two beaches were not anywhere
Speaker 2: near each other. Oh dear, and so uh, Mark Sandrowski
Speaker 2: are our ad. Uh was in some sort of a
Speaker 2: panic in connection.
Speaker 3: With uh with with Keith who was our first idea
Speaker 3: or was Keith our first ada at the time.
Speaker 1: Well, we one of that was a stage manager. We
Speaker 1: had stage managers back then too, So one was a
Speaker 1: stage manager, one was an A D. I don't know,
Speaker 1: they all kind of have the same stage managers were
Speaker 1: A d's. That was just okay, okay. Then I don't
Speaker 1: know who was first for second or yeah, I think.
Speaker 2: First, Keith was first, but I can't remember if Keith
Speaker 2: was still with us it the time. Anyway, So that
Speaker 2: took some coordinating because to two different beaches, two different crowds,
Speaker 2: and getting one to the other it was yeah, oh dear.
Speaker 1: There was a lot of things.
Speaker 2: And I seem to remember before you shoot on Hawaii,
Speaker 2: before you film there, they usually do some sort of
Speaker 2: a like production blessing sort of thing. There's like a
Speaker 2: there's a you know, lore to being on the island, obviously,
Speaker 2: and the most productions do like a some sort of blessing.
Speaker 2: And if I remember right, Jeff said, we didn't do it.
Speaker 1: Oh no, oh no, Is that why everything went wrong?
Speaker 2: I think so, And I think I don't know if
Speaker 2: we've maybe made it up somewhere along we're like, oh God,
Speaker 2: well better bless this. Yeah, but whatever it was, but
Speaker 2: I or maybe that's just you know, a joke that
Speaker 2: Jeff said. Maybe whatever, But That was something that I
Speaker 2: remember hearing was that either we didn't do it, or
Speaker 2: or maybe we didn't.
Speaker 1: It was just it just didn't work. Maybe Bob and
Speaker 1: Dave weren't taking it seriously enough and they were crappy
Speaker 1: inappropriate jokes during a serious ritual, and then karma that
Speaker 1: karma happened, and that's what you get exactly.
Speaker 2: But we were in Hawaii for what like ten days shooting.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I was gonna say two week, ten days,
Speaker 1: two weeks.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think we're been there about ten days. Had
Speaker 2: the best time. Families came, My dad came, my dad,
Speaker 2: your mom and dad came.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: It was like a fun family vacation in between work.
Speaker 1: In between work. Yeah, no, that was It was so fun.
Speaker 1: It was so fun. We were all at the Turtle
Speaker 1: Bay Hilton, like the one you see in the wide shot.
Speaker 1: That is where we all stayed, and I hung out
Speaker 1: of the pool all day while you guys went and
Speaker 1: tried to find your beach. Yeah, to work out. That
Speaker 1: was right.
Speaker 2: And I also remember that the one problem, well not
Speaker 2: the one, but one of the big problems that they
Speaker 2: had with me and John in particular, was that we
Speaker 2: tan really easily and they could not keep us the
Speaker 2: same color, right.
Speaker 1: That was a note like the evolution of your tan,
Speaker 1: the continuity of your tan. I just like it was.
Speaker 2: There's because there's some scenes that we that like come
Speaker 2: in the earth in the beginning of the episode, but
Speaker 2: we shot him later on and I'm like, I look
Speaker 2: like I've just been out in the sun for days,
Speaker 2: because I have and I can really easily and John.
Speaker 2: But what it made me realize was is I was like,
Speaker 2: there's Stephanie's Greek. Oh that's what it is. There she there,
Speaker 2: she gets she she does well in the sun.
Speaker 1: Okay, so that's your part of you call that for me.
Speaker 1: Oh okay.
Speaker 2: But anyway that I do remember that they uh well,
Speaker 2: as soon as you arrive, as soon as you arrive
Speaker 2: at the hotel.
Speaker 1: The first scene in Hawaii, you are so tank Like
Speaker 1: you're so blonde and so tan. It's so blond, so tan. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so good. I can't wait to hear more of these stories.
Speaker 1: Let's get into this recap. We open. We have done
Speaker 1: away with the normal teaser of Michelle doing whatever trick
Speaker 1: of the week she learned. Now everybody is in the kitchen,
Speaker 1: they are scrambling, they're putting together last minute details for
Speaker 1: a surprise. Steph shouts they're coming, They're coming. As Becky
Speaker 1: places a cake on the table. Danny gathers Becky, dj Stephan,
Speaker 1: Michelle in front of the kitchen door and asks if
Speaker 1: is everyone ready. Michelle shouts ready, and Becky and Danny
Speaker 1: hush her and she whispers, I'm sorry, okay. Michelle's peak
Speaker 1: cuteness in this episode, like her delivery and timing. I
Speaker 1: don't know how they got these natural reactions at her,
Speaker 1: but they were hysterical, hysterical. It didn't look like she
Speaker 1: was parroting Adria. It looked very funny, and really I
Speaker 1: loved it. So Joey and Jesse walk in. They're wearing
Speaker 1: their professional clothing, and the family throws streamers at them,
Speaker 1: yelling surprise. They laugh and thank them. Then Jesse turns
Speaker 1: to Joey asking why are they doing this, and Joey responds,
Speaker 1: I don't know. Danny explains that today is the anniversary
Speaker 1: of the day they all became a family. Oh sentimental,
Speaker 1: I know, he states, as you know, you guys moved
Speaker 1: in here to help me out for a couple of months. Now,
Speaker 1: of course, you can never leave Jesse tells the family
Speaker 1: he loves them very much, and then confirms with Danny,
Speaker 1: we can never leave. Danny smiles, that's right. Then Danny
Speaker 1: breaks the news to celebrate, I have planned seven days
Speaker 1: and seven nights of NonStop family fun in Hawaii. Everybody
Speaker 1: cheers and stuff shouts Hawaii. I love their punch great,
Speaker 1: just red sugar water so good. Jesse turns to Becky
Speaker 1: and insists that she come as well. Dj adds, Oh, yeah, Becky,
Speaker 1: you and I would have so much fun. Becky hesitates,
Speaker 1: thinking it's just a family vacation. Then Danny whips out
Speaker 1: a plane ticket for her. She screams and wraps her
Speaker 1: arms around Danny, thanking him. She turns to face Jesse. Oh, Jess,
Speaker 1: you and me and Hawaii. As she wraps her arms
Speaker 1: around him, Jesse excitedly tells her we'll make a pilgrimage
Speaker 1: to every single spot where Elvis shot Blue Hawaii in
Speaker 1: sixty one and Paradise Hawaiian Style in sixty five. Oh, Becky,
Speaker 1: what could be more romantic? Becky awkwardly smiles and says,
Speaker 1: I'll make a list, dude.
Speaker 2: Well, as we see Jesse's still in.
Speaker 1: Jesse lamb dude, Like, come on, dude, where's the romance? Like,
Speaker 1: woo woo your girlfriend. Let's just stop thinking about Oh
Speaker 1: hey Hawaii.
Speaker 2: Come on.
Speaker 1: DJ tells Michelle how exciting this is, and Michelle states, good,
Speaker 1: now cut the cake while pointing to the decorated cake
Speaker 1: on the table. Everybody has grown up. Jody are so
Speaker 1: much taller this season. Yeah, you had a huge bert
Speaker 1: and Kandace has her new classic style with the like
Speaker 1: the feathered.
Speaker 2: Bangs, though the bangs are on points so on They're like,
Speaker 2: that's a good three to four inches of hype.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, well is it resive? Was it this season?
Speaker 1: When she started going to a salon outside of the studio,
Speaker 1: She would get her hair done before coming to the
Speaker 1: studio to get into hair and makeup. So it was
Speaker 1: like one particular person at one particular salon that would
Speaker 1: do that blowout with those bangs. Oh, I don't know,
Speaker 1: and I don't know if it was this season or later,
Speaker 1: but the hairstyle looked like the hairstyle she had. Oh
Speaker 1: then maybe Sun so maybe it was season three?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, well and also season three, we have some
Speaker 2: new title cards.
Speaker 1: Yes, we do have some new title cards.
Speaker 2: The adults and most of the group ones are the
Speaker 2: same other than the kids have new ones.
Speaker 1: Laurie now has her.
Speaker 2: Own title card because she's a series regular. Yes, and
Speaker 2: then of course the family scene at the end. We
Speaker 2: are now in the backyard having a barbecue. Oh I
Speaker 2: love that, seated around at the table together.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So yeah, those were some new little bits in the
Speaker 2: season three. But yeah, everyone has changed and has I
Speaker 2: think I even wrote down like ooh, new haircuts like everyone,
Speaker 2: you know, it's just all trimmed and looks good.
Speaker 1: Everyone was freshly quaffed.
Speaker 2: Everyone looked and again John and I are still very still.
Speaker 1: So did you shoot this before you went to Hawaii
Speaker 1: or act would have been because if I was just
Speaker 1: out in the sun.
Speaker 2: We had a pool when I was a kid, Like,
Speaker 2: if I was just out in the sun like that,
Speaker 2: they that was always the thing that I just come back,
Speaker 2: really really tan, Jody.
Speaker 1: It's unavoidable, no matter how sunscreen you wear.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So after these new title credits, we see some very
Speaker 1: generic stock footage of a surfer in the ocean, just
Speaker 1: to telegraph to anyone who was sleeping through the teaser
Speaker 1: that we are now in Hawaii, in Hawaiian and we
Speaker 1: see a wide shot of the Turtle Bay Hilton. A
Speaker 1: blue van rolls up to the hotel with the Tanner
Speaker 1: family inside. Everyone cheers, we made it. Jesse and Becky
Speaker 1: are greeted by a hula dancer who places a lay
Speaker 1: on Jesse. Jesse eyes the hula dancer and starts to
Speaker 1: say have When Becky tells him careful and grabs him
Speaker 1: by the lay, Jesse finishes, oh, I did yet, and
Speaker 1: perhaps even more offensively, he's wearing white pleated pants that
Speaker 1: are the look maybe Linen, I don't know it.
Speaker 2: Was who wears white pleated pants to yes, Like, well,
Speaker 2: my problem was more with Danny.
Speaker 1: Who's in a coat like a tweed coat. Why is
Speaker 1: he wearing a tweed coat? Yeah, he's not doing Wake
Speaker 1: Up San Francisco Live from Hawaii? Like why why is
Speaker 1: he dressed like this? Like the girls are in cute
Speaker 1: little sun dresses or rompers sandals, Like the women are
Speaker 1: dressed very appropriately, but but not the guys.
Speaker 2: You know what I will say, though, is the again
Speaker 2: the Tanner's piling out of this car and causing all
Speaker 2: of this commotion and yelling and taking pictures. All I
Speaker 2: could think was here they are again, the family that
Speaker 2: you don't want to see on vacations.
Speaker 1: It's like the airport, say the Christmas airport scene. Obnoxious.
Speaker 1: They are the obnoxious Americans that show up ignace and
Speaker 1: are just like loud, drawing attention to themselves. Can't can't
Speaker 1: figure things out. It's it's so. Steph is looking at
Speaker 1: the view and she cannot help her excitement. Hawaii has
Speaker 1: a swimming pool and an ocean and a soda machine.
Speaker 1: No wonder they call it paradise. It's true. The hula
Speaker 1: dancer greets Michelle with a lay and says, Aloha, little girl.
Speaker 1: Michelle responds, Aloha, lady, I see your belly button. Yep.
Speaker 1: She's just pointing out the obvious. You know you got
Speaker 1: a lot of hula dancers there, Yeah, exposed billy buttons.
Speaker 1: So Joey locks eyes with a hula dancer and appears
Speaker 1: to be instantly in love. Dreamy music plays as Joey
Speaker 1: gives the dancer a little wave. Steph interrupts his deep
Speaker 1: fantasy by snapping her fingers in his face. He turns
Speaker 1: to Steph and asks, did you see that girl? First
Speaker 1: she smiled at me, then she winked at me, and
Speaker 1: then she turned into somebody else, and an older lady
Speaker 1: is now standing where the girl once was. She waves
Speaker 1: at Joey, and Joey winds I hate when that happens,
Speaker 1: and Steph rolls her eyes at him, which is the
Speaker 1: perfect like you're rolling over your eyes? Was just no
Speaker 1: notes perfect.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I I'm still so confused. This was I this
Speaker 2: storyline was so weird to me. I was like, it's
Speaker 2: so Joey's just having hallucination. It's just how's he has
Speaker 2: he become that desperate and alone that he's like I see, yeah, he's.
Speaker 1: Not having luck in his love life. So he's now
Speaker 1: he's imagining women. Now he's imagining women. Yeah, and there. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was I guess it was supposed to be like
Speaker 1: a mirage, but it was. Yeah, it went on like
Speaker 1: it's like they could have given him.
Speaker 2: So it was just it just came out of nowhere
Speaker 2: for me. Yeah, but that felt like this entire episode
Speaker 2: just everything comes out of nowhere.
Speaker 1: You're like, WHOA, what is happening? Yeah, just we're in Hawaii.
Speaker 1: We're gonna throw everything and salt that the wall and
Speaker 1: see what sticks everything. So Danny walks over to grab Michelle.
Speaker 1: And announces that he has plans for everyone. Everyone then
Speaker 1: walks away. He says, Yo, callin all Tanners. Where's everybody going?
Speaker 1: DJ's going surfing, stuff is going swimming, and Joey has
Speaker 1: got to find that hula girl. Jesse has his arm around.
Speaker 2: But hula dancer would be more appropriate. But who the dancer?
Speaker 1: Okay? Yeah, no, I didn't mean for you.
Speaker 2: I just meant like he says it, and I.
Speaker 1: Was like, oh yeah, well yeah, she's a woman. She's
Speaker 1: not a girl for sure. So Jesse announces that he
Speaker 1: and Becky are taking the same drive that Elvis took
Speaker 1: in Blue Hawaii, and Becky scrunches up her nose and
Speaker 1: asks Jesse, we are again the self absorption? What are
Speaker 1: you doing with? Narcissism is alive and well right, Danny
Speaker 1: warns everyone to calm down because they are going to
Speaker 1: get to do everything together. Everyone moans why, and Danny
Speaker 1: responds back, well, that's a good start. He reminds him
Speaker 1: they came to Hawaii to celebrate their two years of
Speaker 1: being one big, happy family, and he tells them he
Speaker 1: scheduled every minute of activities and it's all on his
Speaker 1: clipboard of fun. Oh the fun so famous that it
Speaker 1: comes back in fuller House. Danny glances at his watch
Speaker 1: and tells them the trip has begun and per his schedule,
Speaker 1: they only have fifteen minutes to check in. Danny runs off,
Speaker 1: holding Michelle. Sure, and next we're on a golf course
Speaker 1: where Joey has taken a swing at the tea box.
Speaker 1: He sighs and asks you sure nobody else wants to
Speaker 1: play golf. The camera flashes to everyone on a six
Speaker 1: seater golf cart reading magazines, bored out of their minds,
Speaker 1: and everyone's like, no, yep, and Dave really does love golf,
Speaker 1: so this is inaccurate. Yeah, this was great. Yeah, he
Speaker 1: got to do what he loves. Danny narrates as the
Speaker 1: camera pans over a pretty beach. He says, now that
Speaker 1: Joey has had his fun, it's time to learn about
Speaker 1: the culture of Hawaii. Jesse sarcastically asks where are you
Speaker 1: taking us? The don Hoe Museum. And it's funny. It's
Speaker 1: funny to hear like which lines are so eighty r
Speaker 1: like they're so obviously right, this is right, It's I
Speaker 1: imagine there was a lot of looping to be had,
Speaker 1: all right. Next, the crew ends up at the legend
Speaker 1: of the menahunees hut. Steph points at the entrance sign
Speaker 1: and says, look a little hula munchkin. Becky corrects her
Speaker 1: and explains, no, it's a Menahune. According to the ancient legend,
Speaker 1: they were the first people to inhabit the Hawaiian Islands.
Speaker 1: The Manahunis have magical powers and help people when they
Speaker 1: are in trouble, but only if you really believe in them.
Speaker 2: Is this a real lore of the Hawaiian Islands or
Speaker 2: is this just something that they made up for the
Speaker 2: white people that come.
Speaker 1: With Well you know what I mean, right, Okay, I
Speaker 1: think it's a real thing, at least for tourists. I
Speaker 1: don't think it was made up just for this show.
Speaker 2: But no, no, it wasn't just for this show. But
Speaker 2: I mean, like, is it I mean, is it for
Speaker 2: tourists or no?
Speaker 1: Not? But like, is right?
Speaker 2: Is it like something that they made up and they
Speaker 2: were like, ah, let's do this or is it like actually,
Speaker 2: like you know what actual cultural significance is it?
Speaker 1: There's probably a kernel of truth in there, like one
Speaker 1: kernel of cultural significance. And then right, and then just
Speaker 1: the tourists, the white people ran and then how can
Speaker 1: we sell things about it?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: Okay, So if anyone has the real answer to that,
Speaker 1: please let us know, because we.
Speaker 2: Yeah, please, because this storyline felt uh yeah, for I
Speaker 2: was like, oh, we are dangerously close to.
Speaker 1: Just yeah, offending anyway, a lot of people to offend.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I just I would like it to be known
Speaker 2: that I was a child and I did not, but yeah, please,
Speaker 2: there was yeah, because there were a lot of things
Speaker 2: where I was like, I don't know.
Speaker 1: That that's okay? Yeah, well yeah, true.
Speaker 2: Tanner's definitely visited Hawaii.
Speaker 1: In the eighties. Yes, definitely, it's it screams nineteen eighty nine.
Speaker 1: Oh boy, So Steph exclaims that she really does believe
Speaker 1: and she wants to meet at Menahne. DJ tells her, Steph,
Speaker 1: menahoneys are make believe like Mickey Mouse stuph pushes back.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, then how come at Disneyland we shook hands
Speaker 1: with Mickey? Did you shake hands with a make believe mouse?
Speaker 1: DJ fumbles over her words, and Steph emphasizes, I think
Speaker 1: you do know. Steph is just dishing it out, you know, yeah,
Speaker 1: she was really she's so confident. I think you know
Speaker 1: I'm right yeah. Steph turns to talk to mister Bear
Speaker 1: in her arms and says, poor kid can't tell the
Speaker 1: difference between real and make believe because mister Bear is real,
Speaker 1: you know. Of course. Next, the blue van pulls up
Speaker 1: to the beach and Danny announces they have an hour
Speaker 1: and twenty minutes to meet and greet over fifty seven
Speaker 1: varieties of marine life. Everyone cheers and walks to the water.
Speaker 1: The camera cuts to Jesse writing a killer whale and yelling, Becky,
Speaker 1: get a picture. That's this is.
Speaker 2: It was just so I was like, oh, now we're
Speaker 2: writing whales like it was. Everything in this episode happened
Speaker 2: so fast.
Speaker 1: There was no segue. Yeah, Danny has that throw a
Speaker 1: line about marine life. But now suddenly you're like a
Speaker 1: SeaWorld type establishment.
Speaker 2: But fifty seven varieties of marine life. I think they
Speaker 2: were at like marine world or a sea world type.
Speaker 1: Yeah. They weren't snarkling in the ocean. No, you were
Speaker 1: at a no.
Speaker 2: No, we were established visiting some poor little whales in
Speaker 2: a tank.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, and dolphins yeah, and Jesse's writing one of them. Okay.
Speaker 1: Becky tries to take a picture, but says tell him
Speaker 1: to swim more to the left and Jesse's like, it's
Speaker 1: a killer whale. You tell him this is really John
Speaker 1: did great for being as non athletic as he is,
Speaker 1: he did a very good job. Yeah, riding that killer whale. Impressive.
Speaker 1: Joey's on a plank over the water with Michelle on
Speaker 1: his lap and a dolphin dances in front of them.
Speaker 1: Michelle says, nice fishy, Big Fishy and Stephan DJ are
Speaker 1: also hanging out by the water with some dolphins. Danny
Speaker 1: remains on the beach with his video camera, trying to
Speaker 1: capture every moment. DJ and Steph grab onto a dolphin
Speaker 1: and Danny tells them, hang on, girls, those things don't
Speaker 1: come with seat belts. The dolphins pull them as the
Speaker 1: girls laugh and scream. That was such a highlight.
Speaker 2: And of course now I have my you know, poor
Speaker 2: issues with dolphins and all of that in captivity, but
Speaker 2: as a ten year old, as a seven year old,
Speaker 2: it was one of the most exciting moments of my life.
Speaker 2: I love animals. I love anything I get to do
Speaker 2: with animals, and I was like, let's do this.
Speaker 1: I was not afraid. I was like one ready to
Speaker 1: jump right in.
Speaker 2: I think we did it twice because if I remember right,
Speaker 2: the first time we went across, I think Candice started
Speaker 2: to go and then her hands slipped or something and
Speaker 2: I think she had like we had to turn around.
Speaker 1: And do it again.
Speaker 2: Okay, uh, but yeah it was I I mean, as
Speaker 2: you can see from the gigantic smile plastered on my face, huge,
Speaker 2: and I believe that the reactions when we get out
Speaker 2: of the water, when we're like, oh my gosh, that
Speaker 2: was so fun, that was like, that's just genuinely that
Speaker 2: was just the cameras like on us after and that
Speaker 2: was our kind of natural reaction.
Speaker 1: It was pretty amazing. It looked like a blast. Now,
Speaker 1: did you have trainers? Like did you have any instruction
Speaker 1: or did they just throw you on a dolphins and
Speaker 1: hold on? You know? Was one thing. But yeah, no,
Speaker 1: the trainers were right there because.
Speaker 2: Dolphins can you know, they're they're they're animals, so they yeah,
Speaker 2: definitely had to be you know, with the trainers and
Speaker 2: all that kind of stuff. But yeah, it was yeah,
Speaker 2: very you know, they did a good job.
Speaker 1: They didn't.
Speaker 2: None of the animals were like, you know, abused or overworked.
Speaker 1: Or anything like that.
Speaker 2: It was just you know, but we did have like
Speaker 2: one or two times to do it and then that
Speaker 2: was it.
Speaker 1: Okay, so they did. It was one of those no,
Speaker 1: they did not.
Speaker 2: It was one of those like this is this is
Speaker 2: your one shot, enjoy it sort of moments, okay, and
Speaker 2: you know they they go relatively fast and you're like, oh,
Speaker 2: you really got to hold on and they're slippery.
Speaker 1: Oh you know, if you've ever touched a dolphin, they're
Speaker 1: very slippery.
Speaker 2: So it is I can see, uh, you know why
Speaker 2: she slipped off that first go around. But yeah, it's uh,
Speaker 2: it was a really really exciting moment and something that
Speaker 2: I'll never forget, you know, doing with the full house crew.
Speaker 1: Oh it looked awesome. I can only imagine as a
Speaker 1: seven year old, like, what an experience. That's just so cool.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, one of those iconic moments that you just
Speaker 1: always remember. Yeah, absolutely so great. So they reached the
Speaker 1: deck and Danny is standing over them with his clipboard
Speaker 1: and a stopwatch. He announces, Okay, time's up. Everybody out
Speaker 1: of the pool. He blows his whistle and three dolphins
Speaker 1: magically leap out of the water and he shouts not
Speaker 1: you guys. Sometime later, Jesse is excited and runs over
Speaker 1: to a palm tree hanging over a stream. He says,
Speaker 1: this is it, folks, this is the exact tree Elvis
Speaker 1: floated by singing drums of the island in his nineteen
Speaker 1: sixty five Technicolor Classic Paradise Hawaii style. Please just take
Speaker 1: a moment and let it all soak in. I was wondering,
Speaker 1: like he dragged the whole family, like I thought he
Speaker 1: was just Becky was the poor hostage on this, you know.
Speaker 1: Now everyone is the hostage. Everyone hostage. Everyone's the hostage
Speaker 1: in this situation, and the gang. So the gang's watching
Speaker 1: is Jesse's just doing his thing, and Becky finally chimes
Speaker 1: in and says, well, I'm soaked, let's go.
Speaker 2: Well, remember Danny said they had to do everything together
Speaker 2: because originally people were like, oh, I'm gonna go do this,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go do that, but Danny's like, no, we're
Speaker 2: doing it together.
Speaker 1: So everybody had to go.
Speaker 2: While Joey was golfing, everybody asks to go, while Jesse's looking.
Speaker 1: Looking at her. Oh my goodness. Okay, so this is
Speaker 1: Danny's fault. It's it really has nothing to do with Jesse.
Speaker 1: It's Dan.
Speaker 2: He was like, I would have gone and done this
Speaker 2: by myself, but you guys all got to come with
Speaker 2: me because we got to stick togetherat.
Speaker 1: So Jesse asked if they would take some pictures, and
Speaker 1: he strikes an Elvis pos and says, thank you. You're
Speaker 1: a beautiful family. Michelle turns to Becky and mutters, he's
Speaker 1: nuts again, perfect little button to this scene, and she
Speaker 1: crushes it.
Speaker 2: Like yeah, because John is acting like an It's hilarious.
Speaker 1: She's like the Greek chorus. She's saying exactly what we're
Speaker 1: all thinking. Yeah, Jesse is nuts. Everyone is now in
Speaker 1: a kayak, paddling synchronously. How do you say that? Synchronous?
Speaker 1: Synchronous synchronously and yelling stroke?
Speaker 2: Oh god, can you imagine them getting through that?
Speaker 1: How many takes did this take? How many?
Speaker 2: Right with Bob and Dave with a long paddle in
Speaker 2: their hands, yelling's stroke repeated d please. I was actually
Speaker 2: looking at them. I was like, what are they doing?
Speaker 2: Are they doing anything inappropriate? But you know what I mean,
Speaker 2: like what what did they tried to do that?
Speaker 1: They couldn't quite get away with it? But yeah, it
Speaker 1: was I can only imagine, like at least the kids
Speaker 1: were there, so they had to rein it in somewhat.
Speaker 1: But yeah, yeah, they imagine I was going to.
Speaker 2: I don't remember them doing anything, but I'm sure that
Speaker 2: they were. Yeah, and then but I do remember that,
Speaker 2: you know. Again, it was one of those you got
Speaker 2: one shot to do the sort of things when David
Speaker 2: jumps into the water. Yeah, because Joey's hallucinating again, right,
Speaker 2: did Joey bring like some shrooms on this strip?
Speaker 1: What's happening? I don't know, you know, like, is it that,
Speaker 1: are you dehydrated?
Speaker 2: Do you need some water?
Speaker 1: Is it sunstroke? What's happening?
Speaker 2: And why do you keep seeing invisible people?
Speaker 1: It would make more sense if he had sunstroke or
Speaker 1: there was some medical explanation for this. Yeah, we just
Speaker 1: never find out. We never find it out, so weird. Yeah, yeah, anyway,
Speaker 1: but he did this dive was beautiful. At first, I
Speaker 1: was convinced it was a stunt person, but then he
Speaker 1: popped up and I was like, oh my god, that
Speaker 1: was really Dave doing this dive. It was fantastic. Joey
Speaker 1: reaches ashore, but his hula girl is no longer there.
Speaker 1: He weeps, She's gone, and I'm alone and wet and
Speaker 1: hallucinating again.
Speaker 2: Right and right and possibly having a psychotic break. But
Speaker 2: that's that's neither here north east of your concerns.
Speaker 1: Next, the family is on a boat. Oh oh, the boat.
Speaker 1: I have stories about this, but good, I can't wait.
Speaker 1: This is this is adventure. This is ambitious, like put
Speaker 1: in a candy.
Speaker 2: Just one vague story because all of us, all of
Speaker 2: us kids, were so hopped up on dramamine, because we
Speaker 2: were in that boat all day for hours. They were
Speaker 2: worried about it's getting seasick, so they gave us dramamine. Okay, Well,
Speaker 2: one thing that dramamine does is knocks you out.
Speaker 1: Oh no.
Speaker 2: So if you look at Michelle in the entire scene,
Speaker 2: she's wearing that life jacket, but she's just leaned up
Speaker 2: against the table. She is one hundred percent asleep. One
Speaker 2: hundred percent asleep. You can see she look you look
Speaker 2: at me and Canvas over in the corner. When it's
Speaker 2: like just group shots everything, I'm like passages on the like.
Speaker 2: Thank God for the life jackets. It's the only thing
Speaker 2: that kept our heads up. Right, we were all asleep.
Speaker 2: We're out in the sun and on the thing. I
Speaker 2: remember Adria was like talked under the under the the
Speaker 2: cabin of the boat, so she'd like pull us under
Speaker 2: there to get out of the sun. It was hot,
Speaker 2: it was we were out there forever.
Speaker 1: It sounds.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Michelle is one hundred percent asleep. And then when
Speaker 2: you see it, like at the end of the scene.
Speaker 1: She grabs the chips.
Speaker 2: If you look at her face, she's like just like
Speaker 2: I think that was the only action shot because it
Speaker 2: was the only time they could get her to do
Speaker 2: something because they were just out.
Speaker 1: We were all just asleep. Oh my sea. Yeah, that
Speaker 1: that was hysterical. I was just like, why isn't Michelle
Speaker 1: moving over there in the corner? They were like just
Speaker 1: kind of lean her. I don't know, it's so funny.
Speaker 1: She looked like the drunk baby stand in right she did.
Speaker 1: That wassterical. I can only imagine the logistics involved with
Speaker 1: planning a shoot on a moving boat in.
Speaker 2: Well, we had to there was the boat where that
Speaker 2: we were all in, and then of course there's the
Speaker 2: boat next to us that has the crew and stuff
Speaker 2: and the you know all that.
Speaker 1: It was yeah, and Jeff with a broken foot and
Speaker 1: a cast and a wheelchair, was he did they put
Speaker 1: him on the don't think he I don't know. I
Speaker 1: can't imagine they could. I don't know. I don't know
Speaker 1: what a horrible time let him onto a boat. I mean,
Speaker 1: I know they had to wheel him onto the sand,
Speaker 1: but I don't know.
Speaker 2: If they had to put boards down to get him
Speaker 2: across the sand.
Speaker 1: And the crazy thing is is he did it again
Speaker 1: in Fuller House when we went to Japan.
Speaker 2: Right before we went to Japan, he broke his foot
Speaker 2: again and traveled to Japan with a broken foot and
Speaker 2: we were like a full cast with crutches in the
Speaker 2: beginning of season three.
Speaker 1: It's cursed. It's because nobody did the production blessing or whatever. Right, Yep,
Speaker 1: Jeff is still cursed to this day. So Danny says
Speaker 1: the clipboard of fun says that I get to be
Speaker 1: the skipper of the boat, and dj complains, Skipper, We've
Speaker 1: been out here for hours literally, And Jesse's like, Danny,
Speaker 1: do you even have a clue where we are? Everyone
Speaker 1: wearing their bright orange life vests on the boat, neck pillows,
Speaker 1: neck pillows like travel pillows. Yea, and Danny's wearing a
Speaker 1: captain hat and he says, oh he madies gather around
Speaker 1: ye skipper Steff enthusiastically responds II Skipper. I don't know
Speaker 1: if I was.
Speaker 2: Too enthusiastic though, yeah, I was driaming. I was like, yes,
Speaker 2: you're just trying to stay away, just like, yeah, just
Speaker 2: get through the line.
Speaker 1: Danny claims that they will be arriving any minute to Pua,
Speaker 1: where they will have a picnic on the beach and
Speaker 1: a Polynesian show. When Joey asks what island he's referring to,
Speaker 1: Danny sticks his finger on the map to show Joey
Speaker 1: and the island comes up with his finger in the
Speaker 1: form of a potato chip. Dj points out that it's
Speaker 1: on his finger and Jesse says, oh, hey, Maties, your
Speaker 1: skipper's been sailing all morning to a potato chip crumb.
Speaker 2: Everybody else the Dangers of Life before GPS navigating to
Speaker 2: a piece of lint.
Speaker 1: This was a great bit. I mean, it's it's very
Speaker 1: sick commy, but I loved it. I'm like, that's is
Speaker 1: really funny. Like I was very entertained by this.
Speaker 2: I mean, and this whole family is like, we have
Speaker 2: to navigate ourselves to a beach, to an island to
Speaker 2: see a show.
Speaker 1: That's impressive. Yes, it's very very ambitious, but Danny's determined
Speaker 1: to stick to his clipboard of fun, like he's not
Speaker 1: going to stray from that.
Speaker 2: Well, maybe this is where we find out Danny's love
Speaker 2: of nautical things and why his entire house is in
Speaker 2: a nautical theme because he's always dreamed of being a skipper,
Speaker 2: and so this is his moment, and now we see
Speaker 2: that he actually really sucks at it and he should
Speaker 2: just stick to putting a sea pappy.
Speaker 1: In his living room. That all makes sense now, like
Speaker 1: that makes total sense. This is something he's always aspired
Speaker 1: to be. But yeah, he's just stuck with a sea
Speaker 1: pappy and some old ancient wooden.
Speaker 2: Just not yeah, yeah, anytime Danny's on a boat, it
Speaker 2: doesn't sea crews yes, oh bad, and go what.
Speaker 1: Bad things happen when Danny's on a boat? So Becky
Speaker 1: points out an island in the distance and everyone cheers.
Speaker 1: DJ asks exactly where that island is on the map,
Speaker 1: just as Michelle dumps the entire bag of potato chips
Speaker 1: on it or was it even heard?
Speaker 2: Was somebody like no, but you can see weird, like
Speaker 2: the bag goes like over her face and they were
Speaker 2: probably great, she's half a sleep anyway, we don't need.
Speaker 1: To see it yet. We got the shot. Let's move
Speaker 1: on right next on the island. The family lands on
Speaker 1: the island and discovers that there is nothing up the
Speaker 1: beach or down the beach. Jesse says, I haven't seen
Speaker 1: one sign of intelligent life skipper. Danny instructs everyone not
Speaker 1: to panic and to just go back to the boat.
Speaker 1: Joey holds Michelle as she says aye, Aye, skipper, and
Speaker 1: Joey tells her don't encourage Danny. There's been a change
Speaker 1: of plans now, as Danny explains they are going to
Speaker 1: have their picnic on the boat. He says they can
Speaker 1: still make the Polynesian Show, but if they're late, this
Speaker 1: could spell disaster for the clipboard of fun. Oh no.
Speaker 1: Michelle waves bye bye to the boat and DJ thinks
Speaker 1: it's adorable until she realizes it's their boat floating away.
Speaker 1: Danny says, oh, DJ, don't be silly. I tied up
Speaker 1: our boat right and he points to where he thinks
Speaker 1: the boat is, but it's not. Jesse grabs his arm
Speaker 1: and points it in the right direction of where the
Speaker 1: boat actually is, which is several several yards off the shore.
Speaker 1: Danny runs into the water shouting come back, with Jesse
Speaker 1: closely behind him. Becky warns Jesse he won't catch the boat,
Speaker 1: and Jesse says back, I don't want to catch the boat.
Speaker 1: I want to catch Danny.
Speaker 2: Oh, is this round two of when he uh, you know,
Speaker 2: when he when he fractured a rib of Danny's at
Speaker 2: thea after they eloped. Oh yeah, we know there's a
Speaker 2: history of Jesse, you know, pumeling Danny.
Speaker 1: So Danny has a legitimate fear. Yeah, no, this is
Speaker 1: this is Jesse's mildly violent side and right, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm here for this. We cut to a quick commercial break,
Speaker 1: and when we come back, Jesse is still chasing Danny
Speaker 1: around the beach, and John is wearing white sneakers and
Speaker 1: white socks, whereas everyone else's barefoot, Like what what does
Speaker 1: John hate sand?
Speaker 2: Like?
Speaker 1: Why is Jesse wearing in addition to his skinny chicken legs.
Speaker 2: He's got he has very tiny, dainty feet, and he
Speaker 2: and he felt that they looked better in shoes.
Speaker 1: It just looked so out of place that I like,
Speaker 1: this had to be something John insisted on because everyone
Speaker 1: else's well, yeah it was.
Speaker 2: It was part of the look, right, it was like
Speaker 2: the tank top and the white linen pants and.
Speaker 1: Like the shoes, Like I get it.
Speaker 2: It's like my kids that go to the beach and
Speaker 2: they're like I'm and I'm like, why are you wearing
Speaker 2: tennis shoes?
Speaker 1: And they're like it's part of my look. It's like
Speaker 1: I don't understand you. Yeah, well, in this scene he's
Speaker 1: ditched the white linen pants and he's wearing like the
Speaker 1: loudest neon shorts. The neon very very bright, so like
Speaker 1: very bright. They should have been saved and rescued just
Speaker 1: from Yeah, they would have.
Speaker 2: It just could have waved those in the air and
Speaker 2: attract attention.
Speaker 1: That would have solved everything if they just thought of that.
Speaker 2: Well, the whole family is dressed like, uh, a really
Speaker 2: obnoxious sort of flower pattern. Yeah that both clashes and
Speaker 2: coordinates and I'm not sure how, but yeah, it's.
Speaker 1: Very Kimmy gibbler asque. I I loved it. It is.
Speaker 1: The palette is floral, floral, floral.
Speaker 2: You know, mismatched floral.
Speaker 1: I love it.
Speaker 2: May I say Becky's swimsuit cover up that she's wearing
Speaker 2: in the scene has shoulder pads.
Speaker 1: It does, Oh my gosh, that is so eighties? Does
Speaker 1: it a baby suit cover up? Has shoulder pads?
Speaker 2: It severe shoulder pads like Dave LORI like a like
Speaker 2: it was like a like.
Speaker 1: A very like a linebacker.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, very great, like it was yeah, like very
Speaker 2: out and uh huh.
Speaker 1: Hey, you shoulders needed structure in the eighties. They so
Speaker 1: they did.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and each time like shoulder pads.
Speaker 1: So it's hey, when you're hot and sweaty and it's humid,
Speaker 1: what you need more.
Speaker 2: They prevent your shoulders from getting tann though, does it
Speaker 2: leave a strange tan line when you have a shoulder
Speaker 2: pad in.
Speaker 1: Your and I would assume I would assume.
Speaker 2: It create some sort of at least maybe your shoulders
Speaker 2: don't get burnt, like a little mini umbrella.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like a tart.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like a tart or an over a little Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's like a little Yeah, it's like a little patio cover.
Speaker 1: So after Jesse finally calms down, Danny lets him speak.
Speaker 1: Jesse aggressively states, first thing I'd like to say is
Speaker 1: I hate this clipboard of fun and he chucks it
Speaker 1: into the water perfectly like it perfectly lands right in
Speaker 1: between the two guys, it's excellent framing. Jesse is fuminge
Speaker 1: and out of breath. How could a person lose a boat?
Speaker 1: Danny believes the rope must have slipped off the rope
Speaker 1: thingy and Joey chimes in, well, if we were on
Speaker 1: Gilligan's Island, the professor would make a radio out of coconuts.
Speaker 2: Helpful, Joey, it's so helpful. Just go back to having
Speaker 2: a hallucination somewhere and let us figure this out.
Speaker 1: Such a Joey moment, though it was very, very classic.
Speaker 1: Jesse interrupts to say that this is not the time
Speaker 1: for comedy and it's time to blame Danny.
Speaker 2: To be fair, they were all standing there, Yeah, they
Speaker 2: were all standing there on the beach when this boat
Speaker 2: floated away.
Speaker 1: Yeah, nobody knows.
Speaker 2: Now Danny didn't do a great job at tying it up.
Speaker 2: But whoever thought Danny was gonna be, you know, responsible
Speaker 2: enough to tie this boat up, having probably never done
Speaker 2: it in his life?
Speaker 1: I mean that, you know. Yeah, all I'm saying is
Speaker 1: I don't feel this entirely falls on Danny, that the
Speaker 1: boat floated away. No, No, I mean, ultimately it's his
Speaker 1: fault because of the clipboard of Fun and his insistence
Speaker 1: on doing everything together and going that on this boat adventure.
Speaker 1: But yeah, everybody's at fault for losing the boat, because
Speaker 1: come on, when the two year old is the only
Speaker 1: one that notices that the boat's missing, something's wrong. So
Speaker 1: Joey responds relaxed, Jess, we have the rest of our
Speaker 1: lives to blame Danny right now. We need to keep
Speaker 1: things light and easy so the girls don't get scared,
Speaker 1: So I don't get scared. Becky and the girls walk
Speaker 1: over and wonder if they are actually in trouble, and
Speaker 1: the boys all say no. Steph suggests that if they
Speaker 1: believe in the Menahunees, they will come and help them.
Speaker 1: Dj makes fun of Steph and says seven year olds,
Speaker 1: aren't they adorable as she pats Steph's head mm hmm.
Speaker 1: Becky's instinct is in survival mode, and she suggests that
Speaker 1: they start looking for food, shelter, and water. Joey walks
Speaker 1: over to the shore and sees that the clipboard of
Speaker 1: Fun has floated back. Jesse chucks it back into the
Speaker 1: water and says they have a lot to do. Danny
Speaker 1: picks up Michelle and admits that he messed up big time,
Speaker 1: and Michelle says to him, it's okay, skipper, And how
Speaker 1: can some of these scenes look like green screens? Like,
Speaker 1: I know it's just because we're not in a contained environment,
Speaker 1: but some of them look like green screens and some
Speaker 1: of them look like regular beach.
Speaker 2: Well, it's what it is, is that we were like
Speaker 2: the lighting was a light scene when we would like
Speaker 2: flip directions and we were having to account for lighting loss,
Speaker 2: we didn't exit. It was like just a real bright
Speaker 2: white light sort of you know, it was in like
Speaker 2: it was very hard to get you know, subtle lighting matches.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and yeah, it quite.
Speaker 2: Looks like just like a giant bounce, right. It was
Speaker 2: a white sort of light, like a set light. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but yeah, that was what it was, is like just
Speaker 2: it looked very flat. Yeah, there was no depth to
Speaker 2: it because there was no shadows.
Speaker 1: It was just I think that, Yeah, that.
Speaker 2: Always drives me nuts when I see it in shows
Speaker 2: and or particularly sitcoms, like when things look really flat,
Speaker 2: when it's just like a yeah, like it's too bright.
Speaker 1: It really stood out. And there's one point where you're
Speaker 1: talking up to one of the characters and you're like,
Speaker 1: I can see you're not looking at them and the
Speaker 1: eye because it was too bright. I cannot do outdoors.
Speaker 1: I can't.
Speaker 2: I am the I look like mister magoole. I can't
Speaker 2: be outside without sunglasses.
Speaker 1: It's I just can't do it.
Speaker 2: Even when they're like, just look at the sun, and
Speaker 2: I'm like, no, forty forty two years of this, it's
Speaker 2: not gonna get any better. I'm going to look like
Speaker 2: this the whole time. Yeah, and yeah, that was a nightmare.
Speaker 1: That was who Yeah it was who was the DP
Speaker 1: on this, because yeah, they did not have an easy
Speaker 1: job with having to light the out course. Right, Yeah
Speaker 1: here match Hawaii. Yeah, kinds of the day too. Sometimes
Speaker 1: it looks like sunset and sometimes it looks like high noon.
Speaker 1: It's right, oh yeah, trying to yeah exactly a little
Speaker 1: while later, Joey is talking to himself in his Popeye
Speaker 1: voice as he searches to coconut.
Speaker 2: Joey is unraveling alone, talking talking to himself in a
Speaker 2: Popeye voice.
Speaker 1: That's concerning. I would be like, are you he definitely
Speaker 1: has sunstroke or he's ingested something that perhaps should not have.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he he ate a piece of bad uh fruit something.
Speaker 1: It's it's very he's very extra in this. In this scene, Yeah,
Speaker 1: as he stands with two coconuts in his arms, one
Speaker 1: coconut falls onto his head from a tree.
Speaker 2: Also, that would like knock you out, Like people die
Speaker 2: from getting hit on the head with coconut.
Speaker 1: I was surprised this must so well. Obviously it wasn't
Speaker 1: a real coconut, was it? Just like it's probably a foam,
Speaker 1: just like I was, like a foconut, a folcan, Oh,
Speaker 1: a fuconut. I love it. A fake a coconut, a foconut.
Speaker 1: We should have fatten it because it had good bat
Speaker 1: like it looked real enough that it like it just
Speaker 1: hit his head. It didn't bounce like a like a
Speaker 1: nerf ball or whatever it was. But yeah, I'm like
Speaker 1: that had to have hurt. But if it was just like, yeah,
Speaker 1: a foconut, it was probably yeah. I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 2: I don't know if it was a foconut or if
Speaker 2: it was like an actual thing. They just didn't drop
Speaker 2: it from very high. I'm not sure. But all I
Speaker 2: know is if that really happened, I think you would
Speaker 2: be be in the hospital having more problems than just
Speaker 2: speaking in.
Speaker 1: A pop bye voice. Definitely, although that's a pretty major one.
Speaker 1: Dave is doing a lot of stunts in this episode. Really,
Speaker 1: he's to be commended for that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's got a lot, Yeah, diving, jumping, hallucinating, oh yeah,
Speaker 2: pop eyeing, lots of things.
Speaker 1: So then the coconut knocks him onto his knees and
Speaker 1: he appears to be dreaming and he sees his hula
Speaker 1: girl dancing in the water at the shore. Sounds joke again.
Speaker 1: She calls his name. Okay, so this has to be
Speaker 1: a hallucination's audit.
Speaker 2: Now it's auditory hallucinations in addition to just visual.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's he's concerned going beyond some sort of a break.
Speaker 1: So he runs over to hug her in the water,
Speaker 1: but she disappears right as Joey reaches her. This is
Speaker 1: some fancy special effects for nineteen eighty nine sitcom where
Speaker 1: she like disappears and he's for.
Speaker 2: A random storyline about a disappearing woman.
Speaker 1: It's such a it's so weird to me. I just
Speaker 1: this whole story. I'm like, yeah, why. It was like, well,
Speaker 1: they needed to give something to do, something for Joey
Speaker 1: to do, and so they was like, let's have him
Speaker 1: obsess over over a hula dancer and yeah, I guess,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 2: But he now has a concussion, so that could and
Speaker 2: I mean he was hallucinating before the concussion. Now, don't
Speaker 2: let him go to sleep, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: He could, I mean if he starts feeling nauseous.
Speaker 1: It's not that's for sure. So next Jesse is leading
Speaker 1: Becky to a waterfall. They have discovered fresh water. Becky
Speaker 1: admires how romantic the scene is and asks Jesse to
Speaker 1: kiss her. They have a lovely kiss, and Jesse tells
Speaker 1: her in his Elvis accent, that's paradise Hawaiian style. Little mama.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I too would have thrown him off the cliff.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Becky complains, she's like he is still talking about Elvis,
Speaker 1: and Jesse asks, well, what's the matter. You got a
Speaker 1: problem with the King, and she tells him the King
Speaker 1: made the exact same movie thirty three times and the
Speaker 1: only thing that changed were his sideburns. Ooh, she's not wrong,
Speaker 1: that's it's it means, got it not wrong. Jesse hesitates
Speaker 1: to speak, as he can't believe Becky has a problem
Speaker 1: with Elvis's sideburns. He then believes that Becky hates Elvis
Speaker 1: and tells her she is jealous because Elvis has better
Speaker 1: hair than her. Jesse even tells her to check a mirror.
Speaker 1: Why what what?
Speaker 2: Like kiss Hee overreacting again, yet again reacting and having
Speaker 2: to insult her and be like, Elvis has better hair
Speaker 2: than you.
Speaker 1: This is he is so childish. He's so childish. It's like, dude,
Speaker 1: this is the woman that you want as your fiance. Like,
Speaker 1: let's not insult her. It's like, come on, stop it,
Speaker 1: stop it. Your being a little obsessive. Yeah, he is.
Speaker 1: Becky is done. She's done talking with him. Becky just
Speaker 1: jumps into the waterfall like she doesn't hesitate, she's just
Speaker 1: like peace out, MF. And she just jumps right into
Speaker 1: the beautiful swan dive too.
Speaker 2: I mean, I assume those were stunt doubles. We were
Speaker 2: at some nature park I believe where we shot that.
Speaker 2: It was beautiful, It was really really pretty. Yeah, but
Speaker 2: I remember, yeah, it was a stunt doubles up there
Speaker 2: on the top. But it looked like them, right, gorgeous,
Speaker 2: gorgeous setting, and I'm I keep seeing things.
Speaker 1: Is this why they had in Fuller? They had DJ
Speaker 1: and Steve jump off a waterfall too.
Speaker 2: I keep seeing like I think they maybe. Yeah, No,
Speaker 2: I thought the same thing. I was like, oh my gosh,
Speaker 2: it reminds me of you know the episode.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, babe, it's a thing. It's a tradition. Yeah,
Speaker 1: in Full House.
Speaker 2: It's a thing that they jump off, Yeah, into a
Speaker 2: little pond.
Speaker 1: Why wouldn't you. It's if you've got a waterfall, you
Speaker 1: got to use it. People.
Speaker 2: If you've got it, if you've got a waterfall, you
Speaker 2: have to jump off of it. It's which I actually
Speaker 2: don't recommend because oftentimes the water is shallow, so please.
Speaker 1: Be very careful. Ah, yeah, definitely, and never dive head
Speaker 1: first like Becky does. No, No, she's a little too graceful,
Speaker 1: and Jesse's a little more realistic. He just sort of
Speaker 1: kind of cannonballs out there. And then once they land
Speaker 1: in the water and poke their heads back up, they
Speaker 1: just continue fight, fighting, as if you know, they hadn't
Speaker 1: just dived off a cliff. I thought they were going
Speaker 1: for a kiss, like that's what I was expecting them to,
Speaker 1: you know, surface from the water and then immediately embrace
Speaker 1: and start making out. I was surprised they kept fighting.
Speaker 1: So okay, So next we see steph Out wandering the
Speaker 1: island alone but with mister bear. No adults are in sight.
Speaker 1: She's just seven years old. That's what you do.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're like, you should go roam around the jungle. Uh,
Speaker 2: when we're stranded on an island by yourself.
Speaker 1: And some interesting camera work, Like they had like a
Speaker 1: steady cam out and like it was kind of you know,
Speaker 1: a little little reality style.
Speaker 2: Didn't even have like I mean, I don't know how
Speaker 2: they feel me, I have steady like it was a
Speaker 2: mounted cam. I don't even know if we had like
Speaker 2: steady cam types. I mean there was, yeah, I guess
Speaker 2: there was no, but anyway, it different. It looked Yeah,
Speaker 2: it definitely looked different. Yeah, Billy Foster was doing some things.
Speaker 2: He was it had lots of creating some moments. Yeah,
Speaker 2: he was experimenting. Well because you couldn't you because you
Speaker 2: couldn't put a Dolly track down over the over all
Speaker 2: that because it was bumpy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 2: You can't put like a track down that like the
Speaker 2: camera rides on because it's just where you have to. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you have to put it on a camera operator and
Speaker 2: have them wear it.
Speaker 1: So that's why it was like a little bit a
Speaker 1: little bit shaky because you know, yeah, they didn't have
Speaker 1: a dolly. So just then a little boy in a
Speaker 1: hula outfit walks up to Steph. They both shout, and
Speaker 1: Steph says, mata hoodie, and she races to find DJ.
Speaker 2: I just went, oh, yeah, do you remember this boy?
Speaker 1: Do you like? I know I don't. And I'm not
Speaker 1: even credited in the in the show.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, he's the warrior or is that or maybe
Speaker 2: the maybe the speaking one is the warriort.
Speaker 1: You know, he isn't even credited. He's credited. Oh he
Speaker 1: did a great job.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he did a great he was he did a
Speaker 2: great job. But yeah, I just felt felt bad.
Speaker 1: Just I feel saying I felt bad.
Speaker 2: Scott would say that, you know, I just saw some
Speaker 2: young boy in dressed in traditional costume and the jungle
Speaker 2: and I screamed, screamed, just felt.
Speaker 1: Yeah, ran away. Yeah you know you're out, You're unattended.
Speaker 1: There's no events around.
Speaker 2: Something, right, I mean, hey, I would have seen anybody. Yeah,
Speaker 2: thank god Steph needed somebody with her, right, or Steph
Speaker 2: is also hallucinating.
Speaker 1: Maybe this whole twenty two minute episode is one big hallucination.
Speaker 1: It's Kimmy sort of feels because she was invited at
Speaker 1: the last minute, she got disinvited, and so this is
Speaker 1: her dream, This is her hallucination. So DJ's sitting on
Speaker 1: a rock with her fishing rod when she catches the
Speaker 1: clipboard of fun and her reaction is very ironic, considering
Speaker 1: DJ brings back this clipboard of fun and is just
Speaker 1: like Danny in Fuller House. She checks it back into
Speaker 1: the water as Steph tries to catch her breath and
Speaker 1: explain what she just saw. Steph exclaims, We're saved. I
Speaker 1: saw a menahoneye. I do believe. I do believe. DJ
Speaker 1: believes that Steph has been in the sun for way
Speaker 1: too long. Steph says that mister Bear saw the menahonee too,
Speaker 1: and DJ tells her, your only witness has buttons for eyeballs.
Speaker 1: DJ insists that there are no menahonies, which frightens Steph
Speaker 1: as she doesn't know what's going to happen to them.
Speaker 1: They have no house, no bed, no phone. She adds,
Speaker 1: we can't even call out for pizza. We are doomed.
Speaker 1: That's the thing, that's the final straw, is that Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: you can't order pizza. You're doomed. I mean, it's true, Steph.
Speaker 2: All of a sudden, it's like I'm getting a little hungry, guys,
Speaker 2: I little hungry.
Speaker 1: We need food. DJ assures Hery that Danny and the
Speaker 1: boys will figure it out, so there is nothing to
Speaker 1: worry about. The camera cuts to Danny sweeping dirt with
Speaker 1: a homemade broom. He's sweeping a beach, like, here's the
Speaker 1: thing though, here's the thing though.
Speaker 2: I actually wrote down, Oh my gosh, this reminds me
Speaker 2: of when I did that show where I was in Panama.
Speaker 1: Because oh yeah, you actually.
Speaker 2: Do find yourself using palm fronds to dust things off
Speaker 2: or sweep like excess dirt away. Really, it's not like
Speaker 2: you're not gonna get it clean, okay, but it definitely
Speaker 2: comes in handy to like brush things off or like
Speaker 2: sort of sweet you know. Oh, I mean, Danny's probably
Speaker 2: gonna be there for a lot longer. But but yeah, no,
Speaker 2: I did. I was like, oh, yeah, I remember doing that.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, So you're just clearing off a space to
Speaker 1: like sit down or make your hut or whatever. Right,
Speaker 1: you're just kind of yeah, okay, yeah, okay, that's right,
Speaker 1: I forgot you have real life experience with being stranded
Speaker 1: on an island. Stranded on an island, Yeah, exactly, that's
Speaker 1: so great. Joey walks up to Danny carrying large sticks
Speaker 1: and asks what he's doing. Danny responds, this island is
Speaker 1: a pig sty. All of a sudden, Michelle points up
Speaker 1: to the sky at a plane. The plane, the plane.
Speaker 1: Everyone runs to the shore to wave their hands and
Speaker 1: shout for help. Jesse negatively says, they can't hear us,
Speaker 1: they're gone. They should he should have just taken off
Speaker 1: his shorts and waved those neon shorts like that would
Speaker 1: have attracted anyone's attention. Honestly, they should have.
Speaker 2: I mean, one of the first things they should have
Speaker 2: done is spelled sos out on the beach with some rocks.
Speaker 1: But that's you know, no, no, that when they're busy sweeping.
Speaker 1: They're busy sweeping and looking for menahoonees and diving off
Speaker 1: of cliffs. They have a lot on the flip board
Speaker 1: of fund. So Jesse lets Danny know that this is
Speaker 1: all his fault, and he adds, I say we leave
Speaker 1: you and start our own tribe. This isn't survivor like,
Speaker 1: this is Survivor before.
Speaker 2: I mean, it's yeah, it's it's sort of giving vibes
Speaker 2: of like Lord of the Flies a little bit, you know, Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's going to start our own group. And you're right,
Speaker 2: and you're like, oh no, that something's there's gonna be
Speaker 2: a battle.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and there's a conch later. You're right, this is
Speaker 1: Lord of the Flies. Yeah. Yeah. Becky looks up at
Speaker 1: Jesse with a smile and says, what's it going to be?
Speaker 1: A tribe of Elvis impersonators. The two of them quickly
Speaker 1: launch into another fight, and Joey and Danny's start up
Speaker 1: as well.
Speaker 2: That's going well, it's been great, going so well.
Speaker 1: Steph tells DJ she thought everything would be under control.
Speaker 1: As everyone continues to fight, DJ blows into a conch
Speaker 1: shell and tells everyone to stop. She reminds them the
Speaker 1: whole reason for this trip was to celebrate being a family.
Speaker 1: We're lucky to have each other. I bet if we
Speaker 1: start working together as a team, we can make Potato
Speaker 1: Chip Crumb Island a totally rad place to hang.
Speaker 2: A totally rad place to hang was so eighties.
Speaker 3: So I was like, yeah, dude, yeah, like it was
Speaker 3: so yeah, it could be a totally rad place to
Speaker 3: hang like.
Speaker 1: It felt like a like an after school special moment,
Speaker 1: you know, but I did like this speech came out
Speaker 1: of nowhere. She went from, you know, bitching about the
Speaker 1: clipboard of fun in the Ocean to now she's like,
Speaker 1: come on, guys, we can do it.
Speaker 2: Although I will say the whole when she says the
Speaker 2: whole reason for the strip is to celebrate being a family,
Speaker 2: I feel like arguing on a beach is really the
Speaker 2: epitome of vacation with your family.
Speaker 1: It doesn't get more family, does get more family than that?
Speaker 2: That's yeah, going on vacation with your family is just
Speaker 2: arguing with better views.
Speaker 1: It's paying to argue someone.
Speaker 2: Yeah somewhere, I'm paying to argue in a nicer location
Speaker 2: where I don't have to make the bed.
Speaker 1: That's what It's exactly right. That is family vacation in
Speaker 1: a nutshell. Yes, So, DJ thanks everyone for their attention,
Speaker 1: and Michelle replies, you're welcome. Danny is proud of DJ's speech,
Speaker 1: and Joey and Jesse are encouraged to start building a hutt.
Speaker 1: Becky suggests they call it Grassland, and Jesse smiles and
Speaker 1: they kiss. So I guess they've made up. Okay, Steph
Speaker 1: thanks DJ for her speech as well, because she claims
Speaker 1: Michelle was looking a little worried, and Michelle answers, not me.
Speaker 1: She sold you out, man, She's really yeah. I was like,
Speaker 1: it's obviously the little kid. Michelle has learned from Stephanie.
Speaker 1: She's catching on to Stephanie's ways and she's just dishing
Speaker 1: it right bank.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, the third one's always the one like the
Speaker 2: you know, the first one's like the responsible one, the
Speaker 2: second one is a little and then the third one
Speaker 2: is feral. The third one is yeah, totally fair. Yeah s,
Speaker 2: thank you for an extra piece of bacon at breakfast.
Speaker 2: You know that's they don't care. They've learned, they've had
Speaker 2: to fight for everything that they've gotten from the two
Speaker 2: older ones.
Speaker 1: Yet, yes, as the third born in my family, I
Speaker 1: agree one hundred percent. That is survival of the fittest,
Speaker 1: and Michelle is gonna be the FI.
Speaker 2: I'm an only job, but every time I've run into
Speaker 2: third born, I'm like, oh.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you got it. Yeah
Speaker 1: you gotta fight, yeah yep. Uh. So we cut to
Speaker 1: a funny commercial break, and when we come back we
Speaker 1: are gathered around a fire pit. That is, it is
Speaker 1: now dark outside. We're at the hut. How's everyone wearing
Speaker 1: different clothes? Like Jesse's white pleated pants are back. Everyone's
Speaker 1: wearing like a different You can bring luggage to this
Speaker 1: deserted island. Oh that's true.
Speaker 2: I was gonna say that. Well, maybe they had it
Speaker 2: on the boat, but the boat floated away.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you're right. So see this is a little
Speaker 1: you know, continuity issue. But that's okay, that's what we do.
Speaker 2: Well, we had to dress a little bit warmer because
Speaker 2: it was cold. We'd been out in the sun all
Speaker 2: day and then when the wind comes you're like, oh
Speaker 2: it's a little chilly.
Speaker 1: Oh I bet, I bet. Yeah, it's okay. So they
Speaker 1: had to they had to dress you in something to
Speaker 1: keep the actors warm.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Becky's shoulder pads were doing as much as they
Speaker 2: could to keep everyone warm.
Speaker 1: But she couldn't shelter everyone, shelter everyone. No, it was
Speaker 1: only half of us. So DJ makes a toast to Danny, Jesse,
Speaker 1: Joey and for building their beautiful new home. Steph cheers
Speaker 1: to DJ for being the best big sister on the
Speaker 1: whole island. And Michelle also makes a toast to Big Bird.
Speaker 2: Say, this family is handling being stranded on a deserted
Speaker 2: island really well.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they found the soul shining and no food. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like this is great, let's make a toast. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: maybe they all have heat strokes. So they're now all
Speaker 1: delirious and happy.
Speaker 2: They're all hallucinating, right, They're gonna start eating sand pretty
Speaker 2: soon and be like it's oatmeal, right, they're yeah, they're
Speaker 2: they're well on their way to dehydration and and some
Speaker 2: severe health problems.
Speaker 1: They're gonna need medical attention really soon. Here. Yeah, So
Speaker 1: drum beats appear where you can hear them faintly in
Speaker 1: the background, and Steph shouts it's the Menahones. We're saved.
Speaker 1: Steph runs towards the noise and everyone chases after her.
Speaker 2: This is usually This is usually how things go down,
Speaker 2: where I'm like, that's a strangely weird noise.
Speaker 1: I'm going to run towards it. Right it is, It's like,
Speaker 1: what is that? Let's go explore. Danny is carrying a
Speaker 1: lit torch as Steph tells the crew how cute and
Speaker 1: friendly the Manahunies are, just as she finishes her sentence.
Speaker 1: The Menahunees jump out in a big group and scare
Speaker 1: everyone and their faces are covered in paint. Well they're no,
Speaker 1: they're tattooed.
Speaker 2: They are traditionally uh tattooed like Polynesi excuse me, not Polynesian,
Speaker 2: uh Pacific islander face tattoos.
Speaker 1: Oh I thought they were. I thought it was painted
Speaker 1: like tattoos on the face.
Speaker 2: But I mean it might be, but it could But
Speaker 2: that's a real Yeah.
Speaker 1: Okay that is yeah, the more you know, great, there
Speaker 1: you go. So Jesse tells them to take the man responsible, Danny.
Speaker 1: The Menahunies lead them to the drum beats. Danny asks
Speaker 1: them where they are and they say Pooa. They arrived
Speaker 1: at Pooa, but on the other side of the island. Ah,
Speaker 1: that was Danny's mistake. Okay. One of the Manhonies figures
Speaker 1: out it was their boat on the shore and tells
Speaker 1: Danny they like to tease the tourists before putting them
Speaker 1: on stage, and everyone sarcastically laughs.
Speaker 2: Stage make them think that they're dying on a stranded island.
Speaker 2: You're like, ha ha, then we're gonna bring you on stage.
Speaker 1: What jokes on you. Joke's on you. You're not dead,
Speaker 1: You're on stage. Like what and why did the Manahooneys
Speaker 1: think that the Tanners would be good candidates to go
Speaker 1: on stage?
Speaker 2: Like this family is nice and gotten to do everything
Speaker 2: in Hawaii on the first day, they've better.
Speaker 1: One day one day. Yeah, Danny pass so much.
Speaker 2: In where they've ridden marine life, they have taken a boat,
Speaker 2: they have jumped off the cliff.
Speaker 3: Yes, they've golfed, They've built a huh, they've built a hut,
Speaker 3: they have done.
Speaker 1: Things. They're getting their money's worth out of this vacation,
Speaker 1: they tell.
Speaker 2: You, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm also I don't entirely
Speaker 2: believe that Danny didn't like this wasn't like a thing
Speaker 2: where he was like, I'm gonna pay for the extra
Speaker 2: island stranded feature, you know what I mean? And like
Speaker 2: maybe that's what it is. Is like you get charged
Speaker 2: an extra amount and they're like, well, come steal your
Speaker 2: boat and make you think you're on Gilligan's Island, and
Speaker 2: then then you get on stage and like they hate
Speaker 2: Danny actually paid extra for this experience.
Speaker 1: That I would respect. It's a game that movie, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean.
Speaker 2: But it's like that but where you think you're gonna
Speaker 2: die but you're not, and then everyone jumps out at
Speaker 2: the end and goes right, that's what it is.
Speaker 1: That's what really happened. This was all part of plan.
Speaker 1: It's all part of Danny's plan game.
Speaker 2: And he even knew that Jesse was gonna throw the
Speaker 2: clipboard fines and he's like, yeah, yeah, it was all
Speaker 2: it was planned. He knew it, he knew this was happening.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're right, because Danny is much more responsible than this.
Speaker 1: He would not not let a boat just float away,
Speaker 1: you know this call. No, you're right.
Speaker 2: He would not be this calm unless he was like
Speaker 2: any minute now, they should be drums. He paid he
Speaker 2: definitely extra extra for the Gilligan's Island experience.
Speaker 1: I'd love it. I love it so much.
Speaker 2: And it comes with the free skipper hat, so that's
Speaker 2: you get that as a as a bonus and uh
Speaker 2: and all the and all the drama you.
Speaker 1: Could desire sleeping toddlers like you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, and you get to keep the life jackets too,
Speaker 2: so because they're great travel pillows.
Speaker 1: A way, I want I want to go back. I
Speaker 1: want to go back and take this tour. This is fantastic.
Speaker 1: So the Tanners have made it to the Polynesian Show.
Speaker 1: Have they ever on the stage? They have a r
Speaker 1: rescued from the jungle?
Speaker 2: What I literally, I just I was just writing down
Speaker 2: what is happening.
Speaker 1: There's so much happening.
Speaker 2: These random people are now in your show.
Speaker 1: It and then it like and then John turns around,
Speaker 1: Jawn's back in the white linen pants and like those
Speaker 1: aren't bad enough. He turns around and shakes his butt.
Speaker 2: I'll do so when he says, Melka, that's that's Merry Christmas.
Speaker 1: Wait who says that? John says the warrior says it
Speaker 1: like he does. But you know that's because our writers
Speaker 1: were like just throwing a Hawaiian phrase.
Speaker 2: We don't know, you know, maybe I'm gonna say that
Speaker 2: was that was them being like these these idiots and
Speaker 2: they and right, and they were like these and they
Speaker 2: did it, and then that was made so scary and
Speaker 2: he's like, I said, Marry Christmas. But you know, I'm
Speaker 2: gonna go, that's hysterical.
Speaker 1: That's yeah, that feels they're just they're just they're yanking
Speaker 1: our chain. We're just like these stupid white people. Let's
Speaker 1: just say it'll make it the show.
Speaker 2: They still made it, bring them on stage and yelled
Speaker 2: Merry Christmas at him.
Speaker 1: So great. So Joey is dancing right next to his
Speaker 1: hula girl. She is she's real now she is real?
Speaker 2: Why what was happening the whole time that Joey has
Speaker 2: been imagining someone?
Speaker 1: But then she turns out to be real, Like, she's
Speaker 1: absolutely real. It's hysterical. So he manifested her, That's what
Speaker 1: he did. He's just so desperate for a beautiful woman
Speaker 1: to love him back that he manifested.
Speaker 2: Maybe that was also part of the extra package. Was
Speaker 2: you get a destinating that was that you get you
Speaker 2: get done knowing it? Yeah, yeah, they just they give
Speaker 2: you Yeah she tabs of acid and.
Speaker 1: You don't even know it now.
Speaker 2: But maybe like that was they paid for extra for
Speaker 2: the the romantic mirage experience and so and so it
Speaker 2: was just every time they would be like, does someone
Speaker 2: in your party need a need a romantic partner?
Speaker 1: Do you want to make them think that they're seeing
Speaker 1: things that?
Speaker 2: Every every so often on your journey, a random dancer,
Speaker 2: either male or female, will pop up somewhere and then disappear,
Speaker 2: just like what you know what I mean for an
Speaker 2: extra five hundred bucks. You too can think that you're
Speaker 2: imagining people like people are gonna.
Speaker 1: Be going to Hawaiian asking for this tour. They're like,
Speaker 1: I want the full house tour.
Speaker 2: Boat, the strand in the house, out of your mind tour.
Speaker 2: I want to cramp so much Hawaii into the first
Speaker 2: seventeen hours that I'm there that I just have to leave.
Speaker 1: It's just, oh my god.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So, so Joey's now dancing next to next to
Speaker 2: the imaginary non imaginary dancer.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's dancing next to her. Everybody's shaking their hips
Speaker 1: and Becky goes up and whispers something to the band.
Speaker 1: She goes back to Jesse and tells him to rock
Speaker 1: a hula his heart out. She pushes him on stage
Speaker 1: and towards the microphone. Oh gee, yeah, like twist his
Speaker 1: arm to go up to a microphone and sing for
Speaker 1: an audience of screaming fans.
Speaker 2: Also again like the Tanners are the people you don't
Speaker 2: want to meet on vacation.
Speaker 1: Can you imagine?
Speaker 2: You're like, are these things the same idiots that got
Speaker 2: out in front of the hotel and we're yelling and
Speaker 2: taking him all at space and now they're here on
Speaker 2: stage and they've given them microphones.
Speaker 1: Why these poor know, these poor audience members have paid
Speaker 1: a lot of money for this Polynesian show just.
Speaker 2: To have and now we've got to watch these white
Speaker 2: people saying Elvis. You know it's like and also just
Speaker 2: that Becky is like, you know what I'm gonna do?
Speaker 2: You know what would be really appropriate in this situation
Speaker 2: is to go change the entire show then to make
Speaker 2: it about him.
Speaker 1: It's so self centered. Not Becky, but just in general.
Speaker 1: The Tanners are like, how do we make it about us? Yes,
Speaker 1: we don't care about coultry. Is so know this family
Speaker 1: is learn about Hawaii. We want to insert ourselves into Hawaii.
Speaker 1: I mean it's in that sort of I mean, that's
Speaker 1: that says.
Speaker 2: A lot, but yeah, you know that's basically yeah, that's
Speaker 2: a that's a statement, uh, for just tourism in general.
Speaker 1: But it's it's so ridiculous. The last fight, and here's
Speaker 1: the best part. I want to know what the hell
Speaker 1: happened the rest of the week they're there.
Speaker 2: I've only seen the first day, You're right, what was
Speaker 2: the rest of the vacation?
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 2: Did they have fun, what happened? Why didn't What more
Speaker 2: could they have possibly done? They did everything the first day.
Speaker 1: They should have made that. I can't believe this was
Speaker 1: only one twenty two minute episode. It should have been
Speaker 1: a two parter, Like they paid all that money to
Speaker 1: send us to Hawaii. At least get a two parter
Speaker 1: out of it.
Speaker 2: People, right, Well, but can you imagine if it took
Speaker 2: ten days to shoot a twenty two minute episode?
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true. We would have been a first.
Speaker 2: We'd take a lot longer to shoot a two parter.
Speaker 2: And I don't think uh, I don't think we had
Speaker 2: enough dramamine for that.
Speaker 1: No, there's gotta be a child labor law against Yeah,
Speaker 1: keeping kids on an island for an extended period of time.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, it's they just we end.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Jesse sings RockA hula, Michelle's singing. They throw up
Speaker 1: the hang loose sign and the crowd wars, and that's
Speaker 1: our show. It was. Do you remember this, like, do
Speaker 1: you remember were you embarrassed to be on stage? Or
Speaker 1: were you loving it? Oh? God, did you see me dancing?
Speaker 1: I was thrilled. I was having the best time.
Speaker 2: I was like doing a whole little like learning how
Speaker 2: to actually like hula and like move your hips and
Speaker 2: use your feet and all the day. Yeah, yeah, I was.
Speaker 2: I was thrilled. I had a great time. I love
Speaker 2: nothing more than music and dancing and performing. Looking back
Speaker 2: on it now, I'm just like, what are you people doing?
Speaker 1: It's so funny. It's so funny in the moment, though,
Speaker 1: I'm sure it's exhilarating moment I was having a stage,
Speaker 1: there's music people, Oh my god.
Speaker 2: In the moment, I loved it, and it is. It's
Speaker 2: a very fun, very eighties location episode where all of
Speaker 2: the things happen. And I'm pretty sure this was like
Speaker 2: a conglomeration of like seven different shows, each having done
Speaker 2: a trip to Hawaii, and then we just pulled like
Speaker 2: little bits and pieces probably from all of those stories
Speaker 2: and just here's our Hawaii episode.
Speaker 1: And we covered all the bases. It was a lot
Speaker 1: to cover. It was a lot to cover in twenty
Speaker 1: two minutes.
Speaker 2: So much happening with zero connective tissue, zero connective tissue.
Speaker 1: No, there's no character arcs happening here.
Speaker 2: No, this show was in service of really random things. Yeah,
Speaker 2: just random, but yeah, as much Hawaii uh uh. Sort
Speaker 2: of stereotypical experience as you could shove into twenty two minutes.
Speaker 1: It's so funny. Jeff who wrote this, Jeff wrote this, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I would I would love to interview him again and
Speaker 1: ask him all about well he's look, I was on
Speaker 1: so many pain meds.
Speaker 2: I don't even know what happened that And maybe that's
Speaker 2: what it mm you got okay, maybe.
Speaker 1: That's where Joey's hallucination comes from. Is Jeff was on
Speaker 1: percoset and like, well, you're right, Joey's arc.
Speaker 2: Now I'm seeing it. Are you seeing it right? And
Speaker 2: just and mentioned the it just the I'm not even
Speaker 2: gonna I can't you're speechless, speech speechless because I'm like,
Speaker 2: do I even want to approach the like cultural appropriation
Speaker 2: and like terrible just manner in which we addressed so
Speaker 2: much of a.
Speaker 1: You know, Pacific islander, Hawaiian culture, and.
Speaker 2: That was that was definitely that one of those moments
Speaker 2: where I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, no, yeah, that's
Speaker 2: the critic to.
Speaker 1: Do it now, yep, yep no. But but nineteen eighty nine,
Speaker 1: nineteen eighty nine, this was a very popular episode.
Speaker 2: This was screamed about manhones and it was acceptable.
Speaker 1: The whole thing is so cringe, but I love it.
Speaker 1: Like it's such a sitcom. It's just absurditulous. It's just
Speaker 1: it is.
Speaker 2: There's so much happenings all over the place.
Speaker 1: I don't even Yeah, it was, It's just a lot,
Speaker 1: a lot, And it just felt like it felt like
Speaker 1: such a different episode. When you remove us from the stage,
Speaker 1: it feels like almost a completely different show.
Speaker 2: Like what I mean, like it was there was no
Speaker 2: connective to It didn't feel like a show.
Speaker 1: It was just a series of us doing some things.
Speaker 1: It was a fever dream, That's what it was.
Speaker 2: Yes, it was an absolute fever dream. But we did
Speaker 2: get to see a lot of Hawaii. Oh did we
Speaker 2: much more than we saw of Japan when we were
Speaker 2: in Japan on Fuller. I feel like, very true, very true.
Speaker 2: So way to use the space and the uh and
Speaker 2: the the area, you know. But that was I just
Speaker 2: remember it being a really fun episode. It was one
Speaker 2: of the first times that we all got to travel
Speaker 2: together as group, and I loved it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we had so much fun as kids. We went
Speaker 1: to the the Dole Pineapple factory and saw like them
Speaker 1: making the putting the pineapples, you know, slicing them and
Speaker 1: putting them into the cans. Did we go to the
Speaker 1: US cess ari zone and I went.
Speaker 2: To the Dole Factory, but I think my dad went
Speaker 2: with you and your family.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, so it was we had something like that.
Speaker 1: We had a sweeten just not you. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: but we went to the USS Arizona. Is that what
Speaker 1: it is? Yes? Yeah, the pharl Harbor bombing. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: that was very somber. That was I remember.
Speaker 2: That was one of the I remember having such an
Speaker 2: emotional reaction that I wanted I had to leave. I
Speaker 2: don't know if you I do remember that, sobbing and crying.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was really like it was. I it was.
Speaker 2: I just felt it in my body like it was
Speaker 2: a very uh, uncomfortable feeling place. And I just have
Speaker 2: always been sort of impacted by certain spaces and things,
Speaker 2: and it was a lot to take in.
Speaker 1: Yeah, glad we went, but I'm glad too, and I do. Yeah. No,
Speaker 1: I I appreciate that we went and learned about it
Speaker 1: and at such a young age. Yeah, it was still
Speaker 1: it was very impactful, even at the age of thirteen
Speaker 1: and seven. Yeah, it was a great place to go.
Speaker 1: I'm assuming Adria was with us. Too. Yes, education she
Speaker 1: set up our our thing, yea our field drip. But yeah, but.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this was a this was a it was a
Speaker 2: it was a full full house does Hawaii?
Speaker 1: Full house does Hawaii. Yes, the island is full, the
Speaker 1: we're out of the house.
Speaker 2: The island is small, but boys, it full.
Speaker 1: You know. Yeah, it was. It was great. It was
Speaker 1: it's a classic episode that it really is a classic episode.
Speaker 1: And what an opener for season three.
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh, way to kick it off, you know, like
Speaker 2: both it both had me going ooh and like ah,
Speaker 2: you know, there was a roller coaster of emotions of
Speaker 2: good and bad things, but it was it was fun.
Speaker 2: I'm so glad that we got to that, we started
Speaker 2: off season three with this one, to.
Speaker 1: Start starting off with a bang, and it can only
Speaker 1: go up from here.
Speaker 2: So in well, don't say that, don't.
Speaker 1: We'll see that, We'll see. I have no idea what
Speaker 1: happens in season.
Speaker 2: You never know what's going to happen in Caesar, Caesar.
Speaker 2: You never know what's gonna happen in Caesar or season egree.
Speaker 2: But I'm I'm so glad that we got to, you know,
Speaker 2: kick this off right. Yeah, and everybody' you are enjoying
Speaker 2: listening to the podcast, make sure you're also following us
Speaker 2: on Instagram at Howard podcast. Uh, and make sure that
Speaker 2: you can also send us an email about your thoughts
Speaker 2: on the Hawaii episodes, questions, you know whatever, random things,
Speaker 2: leave comments on the page, all that kind of fun stuff.
Speaker 2: But you can email us at Howard podcast at gmail
Speaker 2: dot com. And make sure that you're liking and subscribing
Speaker 2: to the podcast on whatever platform you're listening to it
Speaker 2: so that you can make sure and get all of
Speaker 2: the newest episodes as soon as they are released. And uh,
Speaker 2: thank you guys for joining us. We love you fan
Speaker 2: Rito's and we will see you next time. So remember
Speaker 2: the island is small, but the hula dancers are imaginary.
Speaker 1: That's our new tagline. Yep, that's it. You'll never remember
Speaker 1: it again. Well, oh no, the well that the Metahunies
Speaker 1: are small but the the hula dancers are imaginary.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I was going for let's go with that one. Hello
Speaker 1: ha fanaritos mm hmm