1
00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:04,040
Speaker 1: First Date is follow up powered by the Advocates Injury

2
00:00:04,080 --> 00:00:06,640
Speaker 1: Attorneys online at advocuslaw dot com.

3
00:00:07,040 --> 00:00:09,039
Speaker 2: Iris is on the phone today for a first day

4
00:00:09,119 --> 00:00:12,039
Speaker 2: follow up, and she's getting ghosted by a guy named Toby.

5
00:00:12,039 --> 00:00:13,840
Speaker 2: So in a few minutes we'll call him and see

6
00:00:13,840 --> 00:00:15,480
Speaker 2: if it tell us why he's ghosting her and maybe

7
00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:18,239
Speaker 2: get her a second date. But first, Iris, how long

8
00:00:18,280 --> 00:00:19,640
Speaker 2: has it been since you heard from Toby.

9
00:00:20,960 --> 00:00:22,560
Speaker 1: It's been about two weeks.

10
00:00:23,440 --> 00:00:26,319
Speaker 2: Oh weeks, Okay, that's a decent amount of time. Was

11
00:00:26,320 --> 00:00:27,760
Speaker 2: the last time you talked to him? On the date?

12
00:00:29,120 --> 00:00:32,440
Speaker 1: I texted him? No, the last time I texted him,

13
00:00:32,680 --> 00:00:37,440
Speaker 1: and then he kind of like liked my text. He

14
00:00:37,560 --> 00:00:40,199
Speaker 1: just thumbed up and then that was it. Oh how

15
00:00:40,200 --> 00:00:41,880
Speaker 1: annoying he did not respond.

16
00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:44,319
Speaker 3: Also, I got to praise you for not doing any

17
00:00:44,320 --> 00:00:46,840
Speaker 3: anxiety text and following that up with something, because there's

18
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:48,720
Speaker 3: a good chance that may have happened.

19
00:00:49,720 --> 00:00:53,360
Speaker 1: Thank you. No, I mean I've been restraining myself. I'm

20
00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:55,680
Speaker 1: just like, okay, just play it cool. Like I'm just

21
00:00:55,680 --> 00:00:58,600
Speaker 1: trying to play it cool. I'm trying to like we

22
00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:03,080
Speaker 1: go far back, so we're just yeah, I know I've

23
00:01:03,120 --> 00:01:04,120
Speaker 1: known to her for a while.

24
00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:06,480
Speaker 2: Oh, Okay, so you've known each other. How long have

25
00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:07,280
Speaker 2: you guys known each other?

26
00:01:08,560 --> 00:01:13,600
Speaker 1: We were actually college sweethearts our freshman year, so yeah,

27
00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:16,840
Speaker 1: so you know a good amount of time, like fifteen

28
00:01:16,880 --> 00:01:21,720
Speaker 1: of years. And look, it was quintessential college like he

29
00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:23,679
Speaker 1: made out with a girl and I broke up with him.

30
00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:27,520
Speaker 1: When that happened, you know, it was kind of rite

31
00:01:27,520 --> 00:01:30,800
Speaker 1: a passage of like college stuff. I didn't really take

32
00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:33,600
Speaker 1: it that personal. I had a boyfriend like literally two

33
00:01:33,640 --> 00:01:34,360
Speaker 1: days later.

34
00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:37,720
Speaker 2: So it was okay, So that was back in the day.

35
00:01:37,760 --> 00:01:39,000
Speaker 2: And then you guys reconnected.

36
00:01:39,920 --> 00:01:43,200
Speaker 1: Well, we we actually like bumped into each other at Target,

37
00:01:43,440 --> 00:01:47,240
Speaker 1: so random. Oh yeah, it was really random. I mean

38
00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:50,720
Speaker 1: he looked the same and he just seemed like more manly.

39
00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:53,520
Speaker 1: It was. Yeah, it was kind of like instinct connections.

40
00:01:53,800 --> 00:01:55,440
Speaker 3: So then, how did you guys decide to hang out

41
00:01:55,440 --> 00:01:57,400
Speaker 3: outside of Target or did you do it like in

42
00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:57,960
Speaker 3: that moment?

43
00:01:58,760 --> 00:02:00,840
Speaker 1: Well, it was kind of like just in this moment,

44
00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:05,120
Speaker 1: he's like, hey, can I, you know, get your number?

45
00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:08,160
Speaker 1: Like he wasn't super he wasn't cheesy about it, but

46
00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:10,480
Speaker 1: he wasn't like being like, yeah, of course you want

47
00:02:10,480 --> 00:02:12,680
Speaker 1: to give you your number. And so then we just

48
00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:16,160
Speaker 1: set up a time and went to the candle making workshop.

49
00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:21,320
Speaker 1: It was fun. It was fun and we were just

50
00:02:21,320 --> 00:02:23,360
Speaker 1: like having a really good time. We were like laughing

51
00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:26,680
Speaker 1: at us. We made he makes sense and the sense

52
00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:30,120
Speaker 1: we're all mixed up and kind of felt like all

53
00:02:30,240 --> 00:02:34,280
Speaker 1: the bird popcorn is what we called it. But we

54
00:02:34,280 --> 00:02:36,280
Speaker 1: were just like laughing really hard and people were like

55
00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:38,480
Speaker 1: staring at us. It was really it was. It was

56
00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:39,320
Speaker 1: a really fun day.

57
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:41,360
Speaker 2: So what happened.

58
00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:49,920
Speaker 1: We looked up after? Uh, okay, it was. It was

59
00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:52,880
Speaker 1: great and it was just like nostalgic, but also like

60
00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:55,600
Speaker 1: felt fresh and new, like there was some like new

61
00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:58,480
Speaker 1: chemistry there with him and I. It was just like

62
00:02:58,240 --> 00:03:01,960
Speaker 1: our love story sequel, like it was. It was really sweet.

63
00:03:02,160 --> 00:03:03,680
Speaker 2: Well why do you think he's not calling you back?

64
00:03:04,639 --> 00:03:07,040
Speaker 1: Well, so the girl that he made out with I

65
00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:09,920
Speaker 1: found her on Instagram. This is a long time ago,

66
00:03:10,040 --> 00:03:13,320
Speaker 1: and I sent it to him and I was like,

67
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:14,840
Speaker 1: oh my god, it was that girl that you made

68
00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:19,399
Speaker 1: out with in college. Remember. Yeah, he didn't really stick anything.

69
00:03:19,680 --> 00:03:23,200
Speaker 1: He just kind of like liked it, and I was

70
00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:25,840
Speaker 1: I thought it was he can have crush and fun.

71
00:03:26,639 --> 00:03:31,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's that's kind of awkward, but also kind of silly,

72
00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:33,600
Speaker 3: like why would he? I mean, if you're ghosting somebody

73
00:03:33,639 --> 00:03:36,360
Speaker 3: after that, that's I don't know. Maybe you just didn't

74
00:03:36,360 --> 00:03:37,440
Speaker 3: want to remember that time.

75
00:03:38,240 --> 00:03:41,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, I guess, I don't know. Like I'm a little

76
00:03:41,320 --> 00:03:44,640
Speaker 1: sad about it, like it was maybe it was kind

77
00:03:44,680 --> 00:03:47,080
Speaker 1: of awkward for me to do that, now that you're

78
00:03:47,080 --> 00:03:48,680
Speaker 1: saying that, maybe was.

79
00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:50,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, but you guys hooked up after you hook up

80
00:03:50,760 --> 00:03:52,200
Speaker 3: with somebody that you know they should do more than

81
00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:54,480
Speaker 3: like a text, That's what I think.

82
00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:56,880
Speaker 1: I mean, Like, I don't know, especially because there's history,

83
00:03:56,880 --> 00:03:59,000
Speaker 1: there's not he's nothing random guy I just met.

84
00:03:59,520 --> 00:04:01,720
Speaker 2: Is that the last you heard from him was after that?

85
00:04:02,880 --> 00:04:06,040
Speaker 1: Was basically it? Yeah, that was two weeks ago.

86
00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:08,400
Speaker 2: Okay, well we'll see if we can figure it out

87
00:04:08,400 --> 00:04:10,080
Speaker 2: for you. We'll play a song come back, and then

88
00:04:10,120 --> 00:04:11,880
Speaker 2: call him and see if he'll tell us why he's

89
00:04:11,920 --> 00:04:14,800
Speaker 2: ghosting you, and then see if we can get you

90
00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:15,240
Speaker 2: a second date.

91
00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:18,400
Speaker 1: Okay, I appreciate it, Thank you so much.

92
00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:20,400
Speaker 2: All right, we'll get your first day follow up next.

93
00:04:21,560 --> 00:04:23,800
Speaker 2: If you're just joining us for today's first day follow up.

94
00:04:23,839 --> 00:04:26,680
Speaker 2: Iris is on the phone and she's getting ghosted by

95
00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:28,720
Speaker 2: a guy named Toby so in a second, we're gonna

96
00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:30,480
Speaker 2: call him and see if he'll tell us why he's

97
00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:33,479
Speaker 2: ghosting her and maybe get her a second date. But first, Iris,

98
00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:35,080
Speaker 2: why don't you break down your date again for us

99
00:04:35,120 --> 00:04:35,520
Speaker 2: real quick?

100
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:41,159
Speaker 1: Sure, we ran into each other at Target. We're old

101
00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:46,040
Speaker 1: college freshman sweethearts and sparks flu. We went and had

102
00:04:46,080 --> 00:04:49,640
Speaker 1: a date. We made some candles, had it blast, and

103
00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:53,240
Speaker 1: then hooked up that night. And then I sent him

104
00:04:53,480 --> 00:04:57,960
Speaker 1: a text like a day later, basically reminded him of

105
00:04:58,320 --> 00:05:02,159
Speaker 1: the past and that I haven't heard from him in

106
00:05:02,200 --> 00:05:02,760
Speaker 1: two weeks.

107
00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:05,799
Speaker 2: All right, are you ready for us to call him?

108
00:05:06,320 --> 00:05:07,240
Speaker 1: Yeah? I'm ready.

109
00:05:07,480 --> 00:05:22,640
Speaker 2: Ok, here we go. Hello, Hi, Mass speak to Toby please.

110
00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:24,200
Speaker 1: Yes?

111
00:05:24,680 --> 00:05:26,560
Speaker 2: Is this hey Toby? How are you? This is a

112
00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:28,120
Speaker 2: radio show. It's called The Jubil Show.

113
00:05:28,200 --> 00:05:28,679
Speaker 3: Hi Toby.

114
00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:29,120
Speaker 1: I'm Nina.

115
00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:34,280
Speaker 2: Hi, I'm Victoria and my name's Jeuble. What's up? What's

116
00:05:34,360 --> 00:05:37,799
Speaker 2: up much? Did you ever listened to the show before?

117
00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:39,000
Speaker 4: Yeah?

118
00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:43,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I'm every once in a while.

119
00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:46,680
Speaker 4: I work from home, but you know when I'm not okay,

120
00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:48,720
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I've got you guys on in the car.

121
00:05:48,839 --> 00:05:52,920
Speaker 2: Sure cool, Thank you very much. Yeah, Toby, then you've

122
00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:55,640
Speaker 2: probably heard the first day follow up before, and that's

123
00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:57,039
Speaker 2: a segment where if you go on a date with

124
00:05:57,120 --> 00:06:00,560
Speaker 2: somebody and you were phosting them, they can have us

125
00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:03,080
Speaker 2: get you on the phone and ask why you're ghosting

126
00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:08,200
Speaker 2: and we got an email about you from somebody.

127
00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:13,320
Speaker 4: U uh huh okay, uh yeah, this is a little awkward.

128
00:06:14,720 --> 00:06:17,120
Speaker 2: Do you know whould email us? Yeah?

129
00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:19,479
Speaker 4: I'm assuming this is about Iris, right?

130
00:06:19,839 --> 00:06:22,960
Speaker 2: Yeah? Iris, you guys used to be college sweethearts and

131
00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:25,120
Speaker 2: then ended up running into each other again and went

132
00:06:25,160 --> 00:06:26,919
Speaker 2: on a date and now you're ghosting or she doesn't know?

133
00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:28,640
Speaker 2: Why would you mind telling you?

134
00:06:28,720 --> 00:06:34,279
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's please do not judge me like this is

135
00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:36,360
Speaker 4: going to sound a little more loaded than it is.

136
00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:42,400
Speaker 4: But I'm I'm kind of I'm I'm not kind of.

137
00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:53,840
Speaker 4: I am I'm engaged. I mean, it's complicated, but uh yeah,

138
00:06:53,839 --> 00:06:57,120
Speaker 4: I know it's it's it's like we paid for the

139
00:06:57,279 --> 00:06:58,960
Speaker 4: invitations and everything.

140
00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:00,719
Speaker 1: So what.

141
00:07:02,839 --> 00:07:06,320
Speaker 3: Toby, Hey, Toby that she's on the phone, do you

142
00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:07,080
Speaker 3: have anything?

143
00:07:07,720 --> 00:07:08,280
Speaker 1: Yeah? What?

144
00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:09,600
Speaker 5: Oh?

145
00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:11,600
Speaker 4: Uh got?

146
00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:13,600
Speaker 1: Uh hi? Wow?

147
00:07:16,440 --> 00:07:21,920
Speaker 4: No? I please, just sorry, I'm not good with the confrontation.

148
00:07:22,320 --> 00:07:24,960
Speaker 5: Uh oh, so.

149
00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:26,320
Speaker 1: You're gonna burn me again?

150
00:07:27,320 --> 00:07:31,840
Speaker 4: I'm sorry, Okay, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't.

151
00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:39,720
Speaker 4: I didn't know, Okay, I'm sorry. Just please, I didn't

152
00:07:39,760 --> 00:07:43,120
Speaker 4: know what to do. Okay, you like you can't really

153
00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:46,520
Speaker 4: you got me really messed up over here, and I'm.

154
00:07:48,640 --> 00:07:49,360
Speaker 1: I should go in there.

155
00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:56,320
Speaker 4: I couldn't stop thinking about like you and your laugh

156
00:07:56,600 --> 00:08:00,840
Speaker 4: and and the way that you you smell, like like

157
00:08:01,160 --> 00:08:06,280
Speaker 4: toasting vanilla, you know, after doing the candles and your

158
00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:13,080
Speaker 4: lips and you oh god, we are together, and I'm sorry.

159
00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:14,280
Speaker 4: I'm just I'm sorry.

160
00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:16,920
Speaker 2: Some you do often you cheat on your fiance often.

161
00:08:18,320 --> 00:08:21,280
Speaker 4: No, no, no, no, I just I think I want

162
00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:23,080
Speaker 4: to I think I have to call off my wedding.

163
00:08:23,560 --> 00:08:26,000
Speaker 3: Do you think that you're honest of yourself, Toby? Do

164
00:08:26,040 --> 00:08:27,760
Speaker 3: you think that you actually wanted to call off your

165
00:08:27,760 --> 00:08:31,320
Speaker 3: wedding and needed an excuse? Or is it really because

166
00:08:31,360 --> 00:08:32,800
Speaker 3: you have feelings for Iris?

167
00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:36,600
Speaker 4: I know what I felt with Iris, and I feel

168
00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:39,000
Speaker 4: like you felt it too. I know you felt it too.

169
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:42,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, but like you can't see those things after finding

170
00:08:42,640 --> 00:08:45,880
Speaker 1: out that you're engaged, Toby, Like really.

171
00:08:46,640 --> 00:08:48,679
Speaker 4: I just I just feel like we just need to

172
00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:51,040
Speaker 4: spend a little more time together so that I can

173
00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:54,200
Speaker 4: like see like if me doing this is the right

174
00:08:54,240 --> 00:08:58,840
Speaker 4: idea or not you know, No, you're engaged. What?

175
00:08:59,240 --> 00:09:01,480
Speaker 1: No, you're this is ridiculous.

176
00:09:01,679 --> 00:09:05,400
Speaker 2: No, I didn't you say iris when we were talking

177
00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:07,200
Speaker 2: to you earlier that when you dated him in college

178
00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:08,280
Speaker 2: he cheated on you too.

179
00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:11,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're doing it again. Like again, we're here. We're

180
00:09:11,679 --> 00:09:14,400
Speaker 1: basically the same spot that we left off on. That

181
00:09:14,559 --> 00:09:15,240
Speaker 1: was so much.

182
00:09:15,360 --> 00:09:16,680
Speaker 5: That was totally different.

183
00:09:16,720 --> 00:09:19,080
Speaker 4: That was like fifteen years ago.

184
00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:25,800
Speaker 5: Is i'mferent person now, you're a different person that that

185
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:29,280
Speaker 5: was that I like made out with some other ticket

186
00:09:29,440 --> 00:09:30,400
Speaker 5: was that was nothing.

187
00:09:30,920 --> 00:09:34,480
Speaker 4: This is like very different. We should go off air

188
00:09:34,559 --> 00:09:36,320
Speaker 4: and we should just talk to this that we should

189
00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:38,959
Speaker 4: meet up, we should school out. We just go out

190
00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:42,240
Speaker 4: again and see you know if I feel like the

191
00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:44,679
Speaker 4: sparks are there and I've just been like these I

192
00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:49,520
Speaker 4: haven't responded because I'm I can't stop thinking about you,

193
00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:52,480
Speaker 4: you know, and and it's you're engaged.

194
00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:54,800
Speaker 1: You're engaged, and I don't want you to not be

195
00:09:54,880 --> 00:09:57,840
Speaker 1: engaged because of me, because of a target and are

196
00:09:58,200 --> 00:10:02,120
Speaker 1: stupid date with candles. No, No, this is ridiculous. Just

197
00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:05,520
Speaker 1: go on with your life and I'll see you never.

198
00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:10,160
Speaker 4: No, I'm sorry, Like I feel like I feel like

199
00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:12,920
Speaker 4: us reconnecting with like fate in a way. You know,

200
00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:16,040
Speaker 4: it's like you. I feel like you're You're the woman

201
00:10:16,160 --> 00:10:17,240
Speaker 4: I always should have been with.

202
00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:20,240
Speaker 1: I feel horrible forever who you're engaged to.

203
00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:23,559
Speaker 4: And just you know, I feel horrible too. I know,

204
00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:27,640
Speaker 4: I know I feel horrible. I think I think I'm

205
00:10:27,640 --> 00:10:31,839
Speaker 4: in love with you. Oh wow, you need to have

206
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:32,480
Speaker 4: to share this.

207
00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:36,719
Speaker 1: This is not okay. I know it's I know it's

208
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:37,120
Speaker 1: not okay.

209
00:10:37,200 --> 00:10:41,559
Speaker 4: That's why we need to meet up, you know, and

210
00:10:41,559 --> 00:10:43,760
Speaker 4: and we can just if you need a little time

211
00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:46,559
Speaker 4: to think this over. I totally get it, but I

212
00:10:46,559 --> 00:10:47,400
Speaker 4: I want to see you.

213
00:10:47,920 --> 00:10:50,000
Speaker 2: Well, I have to ask because it's the first day

214
00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:51,760
Speaker 2: follow up Iris, would you like to go on another

215
00:10:51,800 --> 00:10:53,160
Speaker 2: day with Toby? We'll pay for it.

216
00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:55,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'll meet up with you.

217
00:10:55,720 --> 00:10:59,040
Speaker 4: But I'm not making anyone thank you, thank you.

218
00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:02,600
Speaker 1: I just think I have to check it out. Like

219
00:11:02,679 --> 00:11:06,240
Speaker 1: Toby said, I just I'm just check out. Like we're

220
00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:08,079
Speaker 1: just going to talk, Toby, Nothing's going to happen.

221
00:11:08,280 --> 00:11:08,880
Speaker 2: Are you sure?

222
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:09,600
Speaker 1: You know you're playing?

223
00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:13,800
Speaker 4: I get it, and we'll just talk.

224
00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:14,319
Speaker 1: We won't.

225
00:11:14,679 --> 00:11:17,280
Speaker 4: We won't mess around with candles or sense or any

226
00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:17,800
Speaker 4: of that stuff.

227
00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:20,280
Speaker 2: Oh my god, look each.

228
00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:23,439
Speaker 4: Other in the eyes and see what this is.

229
00:11:24,960 --> 00:11:29,040
Speaker 1: Okay, Yeah, let's just okay, just for a little bit.

230
00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:33,199
Speaker 2: All right. Well, good luck Iris and Toby.

231
00:11:33,480 --> 00:11:33,960
Speaker 1: Thank you.

232
00:11:34,200 --> 00:11:36,640
Speaker 2: Be careful, Iris, be very careful.

233
00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:41,199
Speaker 1: I will be. Thank you so much. You will.

234
00:11:41,360 --> 00:11:42,600
Speaker 2: First date fallow up