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Speaker 1: George Washington was walking around with another nigga's teeth in

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Speaker 1: his mouth. Do you think that motherfucker wasn't willing to

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Speaker 1: eat a slave? He was? I know who was definitely

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Speaker 1: eating slaves. He ain't. He didn't finish, but he ain't.

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Speaker 1: He didn't finish. He took a nibble. He said, Coda,

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Speaker 1: come in here, how your mama doing. She get a

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Speaker 1: kid on the bed? Yeah, go ahead, and dropped the niggers.

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Speaker 1: Chips in your bears are racists mostly money stuff. I

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Speaker 1: can't tell me. Uh huh, there it is. You already

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Speaker 1: know what the fuck is? There it is. Ladies and gentlemen,

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Speaker 1: Welcome to another phenomenal episode of My Mama Told Me,

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Speaker 1: the podcast where we dive deep deep into the pockets

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Speaker 1: of black conspiracy theories and we finally work to prove

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Speaker 1: that Nipsey Hustle did not, unfortunately get into heaven because

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Speaker 1: Jesus Christ is a Latin king. It's it's sad news.

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Speaker 1: But you can't show up to happen with all that

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Speaker 1: blue on Nipsey. That's not how Jesus Christ gang bangs.

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Speaker 1: You should have picked a better gang, a different gang.

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Speaker 1: I'm not gonna say better. I'm not in any of

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Speaker 1: these games. I'm an affiliated and hopefully Jesus just lets

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Speaker 1: me walk by. Much like the gangbangers that I knew

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Speaker 1: growing up, I just hope that Nigga just lets me

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Speaker 1: walk on by and you don't bother me when it's

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Speaker 1: time for me to make it up to the upper room. Hey,

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Speaker 1: I'm your host, Lengthy Cournet. As always, I'm excited to

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Speaker 1: be here. I'm having a pretty good day. I went

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Speaker 1: outside today, which is a rare feat. I saw the

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Speaker 1: son and I was like, bitch, where you been at?

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Speaker 1: But anyway, that's on me. I should have been seeing

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Speaker 1: this soun more often. Maybe my skin wouldn't be so

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Speaker 1: pale and sickly. Anyway, my yesterday. She has beautiful skin,

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Speaker 1: not pale or sickly at all, unbelievable skin, and she's

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Speaker 1: very funny on top of that. It's a it's a

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Speaker 1: hell of a combination. She's hysterical. You know her from

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Speaker 1: her own podcast, The Unofficial Expert that she runs with

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Speaker 1: Sydney Washington podcast I love very deeply. You know her

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Speaker 1: from Comedy Central, but that's more importantly. She's a goddamned

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Speaker 1: philanthropist and you all should know her from her work

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Speaker 1: in philanthropy. What kind of philanthropy. She's been very vague

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Speaker 1: about it. She won't tell me exactly what kind of

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Speaker 1: philanthropy it is, but I bet it's pretty good and

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Speaker 1: she's hilarious. Give it up for my guest. MS. Marie

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Speaker 1: foul Stin, Thank you some achs. Thank you so much.

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Speaker 1: Hold on, let me slide my Nobel Peace Prize out

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Speaker 1: of that. I like you just keep it within reach everyone. Yes, yes, yes, yes,

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Speaker 1: I also have an egot there. I like that. You

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Speaker 1: think that he got is one single prize? No, no, no,

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Speaker 1: I said, they're all over there. I have, and he got.

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Speaker 1: It's one trophy, real big. If I put the Nobel

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Speaker 1: Peace Prize with all the it's a sou Yeah. Super

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Speaker 1: super excited to be here sharing my you know, my

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Speaker 1: wisdom with you today and I can't wait to hear

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Speaker 1: your wisdom. You came with a conspiracy theory that that

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Speaker 1: I think we're gonna have to be careful with if

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Speaker 1: I want to start us off right, I know we're

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Speaker 1: gonna have to tiptoe a little bit in this motherfucker

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Speaker 1: because you came with a hot one. You said, my

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Speaker 1: Mama told me the chicken at Chinese restaurants isn't real. Yep,

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Speaker 1: that's what she said. It's not. Okay, all right, okay,

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Speaker 1: now tread carefully because this one, this is stuff. Let

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Speaker 1: me just say, we're in the middle of Asian American

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Speaker 1: and Pacific Islander Heritage Month. So this is this is

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Speaker 1: at at the very least problematic and and in a

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Speaker 1: lot of ways it's rooted in objectively racist and horrible

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Speaker 1: stereotypes and just backwards thinking. So I want you to

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Speaker 1: to tread carefully, tiptoe through this. Motherfucker. I'm a crip

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Speaker 1: walk around this one. No, that's not what Jesus wants

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Speaker 1: for you. Well, I'm just doing like Nipsey is doing

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Speaker 1: it where he said he's not in heaven. That was

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Speaker 1: actually really funny. The marathon continues downstairs. Oh man, this

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Speaker 1: kid's gonna kill me. No, someday they're gonna grow up

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Speaker 1: to murder me. Um yeah, I don't really hard time.

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to figure out what I want to talk about.

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Speaker 1: I mean, you know, I had agreed to do this

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Speaker 1: like a month and like stop any time to think

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Speaker 1: about Oh you mean that free podcast that wasn't at

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Speaker 1: the front of your mind. Yeah, I get that. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but I had literally nothing else to think about. I

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Speaker 1: could have thought about this deeply, like I could have

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Speaker 1: ordered an encyclopedia set and research, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 1: I actually I called my mom yesterday and I was like,

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Speaker 1: some crazy stuff, like you be saying, you know how

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Speaker 1: you've been talking just in your opinions, Yeah, just disrespectful

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Speaker 1: conspiracy theories. And she just started going And then I

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Speaker 1: remembered the Chinese food one because my mom is like, really,

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Speaker 1: my mother is peak won't eat anybody else's food. She

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Speaker 1: is queen of the we got food at home, right,

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Speaker 1: She's like the inventor of who cooked that? Who made that?

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Speaker 1: So she's who everybody is tweeting about at these uh

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Speaker 1: metaphorical cook that's exactly about the food and the PoTA

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Speaker 1: and whatnot. But my mom is an amazing cook. So like,

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Speaker 1: she won't eat anybody else's food because she's like, well,

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Speaker 1: I don't I don't know how to clean the chicken

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Speaker 1: that doesn't look like they cooked it. Probably she won't.

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Speaker 1: She doesn't eat out at all. So when we were little,

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Speaker 1: we were like, we get pizza and she'd be like, no,

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Speaker 1: pizza at the house, and it was like, it's gonna

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Speaker 1: be healthy and it's gonna be on bread. It isn't right,

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Speaker 1: let's gonna have weird spices and it that that ain't dominoes. Yes,

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Speaker 1: that's you. That's your ship that and she's from Haiti,

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Speaker 1: so it's like like Haitian, it's on cassa have curry

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Speaker 1: on it. I don't like this. That's just like is

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Speaker 1: this deep froud? Like is this pork? What? He is? This?

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Speaker 1: So the thing that she always says, and she my

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Speaker 1: mom is like a really good speaker, Like she tells

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Speaker 1: stories and she's usually lying or making stuff up, but

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Speaker 1: like she speaks so convincingly that you just have to

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Speaker 1: believe her. I mean, do you listen, it's not my

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Speaker 1: mother my We all have things that I think our

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Speaker 1: friends find super endearing about our parents and we're like yeah, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: But I was there the whole time. This is endearing

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Speaker 1: for me. I'm not actually enjoying this at all, But

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Speaker 1: go crazy. I'm glad you like my mom's lies, right,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, well, wait till you get the chapter twenty nine.

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Speaker 1: This is a twist. She said stuff. It's like living

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Speaker 1: in in the arl Stein book. Right, It's like the

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Speaker 1: one lie that I remember her saying that I believed

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Speaker 1: for years is my sister has dimples, right, And I

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Speaker 1: was like, I don't have dimples. Why why don't I

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Speaker 1: have dimples? And my mom was like, well, when babies

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Speaker 1: are young, you give them dimples by squeeze is really tight.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, that's how you get dimples. And

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Speaker 1: I went to school and I just thought that and

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Speaker 1: I wasn't. I was met like in sixth grade. I

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Speaker 1: was way too old to still think this. And I

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Speaker 1: love that because that also implies that your mother, for

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Speaker 1: whatever reason, was like I'm gonna squeeze this one's face.

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Speaker 1: I ain't squeezing that little one. No no, no, like

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Speaker 1: I ain't gonna make this one special to no no,

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Speaker 1: no no. Right. So I was like in school and

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Speaker 1: I said it, and everybody was like the fuck. Like

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Speaker 1: everybody was like, oh, Marie's dumb, dumb. And then y'all

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Speaker 1: know Marie's thought this whole time, We thought she was

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Speaker 1: just talking. She don't. They're like the glasses are fake, y'all.

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Speaker 1: She so she is filled with all kinds of nonsense.

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Speaker 1: It sounds like and one of the things that that

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Speaker 1: is nonsense that she shared with you was the possibility

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Speaker 1: that the chicken that Chinese food restaurants it isn't real, yes,

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Speaker 1: because my mom is like, well, you know, Chinese people

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Speaker 1: eat everything, right, She's like, they eat all types of meat.

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Speaker 1: So she's like they eat horse and cat and rat

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Speaker 1: and pig and five golden rings. Like she lifts all

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Speaker 1: these things. And I was like, oh, and then, you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't know if you know anything about the what'sapp

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Speaker 1: culture a little bit. My mother lives in Ghana now

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Speaker 1: and so she moved out there to be with a

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Speaker 1: man who she loves deeply. And Okay, so her and

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Speaker 1: my little sister living Ghana, and so she is slowly

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Speaker 1: becoming a WhatsApp lady in a way that throws me

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Speaker 1: off every single time. But yeah, tell me more about

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Speaker 1: the WhatsApp culture. Okay, So peak WhatsApp culture is like

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Speaker 1: they send like recipes and those like glitterally like happy

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Speaker 1: things giving means you know what I'm talking, it'll be

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Speaker 1: like happy Holidays and it's like it's like my Space background. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's got a real friends survibe to it where it's like, yes,

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Speaker 1: the technology has advanced beyond this, you could you could

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Speaker 1: send some other ship. You could send a clear like

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Speaker 1: something clear. It's like they send like Bigfoot videos, like

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Speaker 1: it's always like a grainy quality film, but like some

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Speaker 1: there's like a video that was floating around of like

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Speaker 1: some like Asian person like skinning something and there was

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Speaker 1: like a stack of little bodies anyway, So yes, it

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Speaker 1: was like it's there's a picture somewhere that my mom

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Speaker 1: saw or somebody what's app to her and it was

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Speaker 1: like little piles of mice or something skinned and that

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Speaker 1: is my mom was like, see, I told you that's

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Speaker 1: what they're eating when you get Chinese food. And it's like, girl,

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Speaker 1: I mean maybe, but but I don't know. Here's the

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Speaker 1: thing is, And this is a conspiracy theory, a rumor

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Speaker 1: that I think I've heard, we've all heard for for generations.

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Speaker 1: And it's always so funny to me to think about

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Speaker 1: those kinds of videos where they point to this one

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Speaker 1: individual who's skinning a bunch of rats and stacking their

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Speaker 1: bodies on top of each other. It's like, how much

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Speaker 1: of that is Chinese people and how much of that

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Speaker 1: is just that one nigga who really likes how rat tastes, Like,

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Speaker 1: why does that have to be all of them? Why

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Speaker 1: can't that just be that one weird motherfucker who's out

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Speaker 1: here eating rats rat kebabs. Yes, but because of that,

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Speaker 1: like I can't eat Chinese food as freely as my

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Speaker 1: friends eat it, right, Like, so I can only order

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Speaker 1: like I'll eat shrimp and I'll eat the chicken wings

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Speaker 1: because those are shaped like what they're supposed to be.

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Speaker 1: I'm not getting beef and broccoli. I'm not getting chicken

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Speaker 1: and broccoli because those are weird shapes. Yeah, and I

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Speaker 1: I will say that while while this is and who

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Speaker 1: we better tread fucking carefully, But while this is I

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Speaker 1: think a conspiracy theory that has many elements of like

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Speaker 1: racist backwards thinking ingrained in it. There are little things

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Speaker 1: that happen where you're like, damn, maybe these racist motherfuckers

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Speaker 1: are right right, But like, my mother is very particular

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Speaker 1: about chicken in general, Like she refuses to buy chicken

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Speaker 1: breast from the supermarket because she grew up on a farm,

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Speaker 1: she had chickens, she had goats, blah blah blah blah.

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Speaker 1: But we'll be at the supermarket and she'll be like,

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Speaker 1: I've never seen a chicken with breast that big. That's

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Speaker 1: not chicken. You think when you think about how small

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Speaker 1: a chicken is, the breast me real juicy. Sometimes hey

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Speaker 1: and listened, and there's enough scientific evidence. I don't know

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Speaker 1: if you've ever seen like supersized Me, which obviously comes

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Speaker 1: with a little bit of uh it's it's problematic in

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Speaker 1: its own form. But one of the things that they

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Speaker 1: talk about in Supersize Me is the type of hormones

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Speaker 1: that they inject into the fucking McDonald's chickens so that

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Speaker 1: they the titties are so big they can't even move.

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Speaker 1: They're just like alive for a moment. They cut the

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Speaker 1: titties off and then it's done, and it's like, ah, fuck,

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Speaker 1: your mom's right, those titties aren't natural. But at the

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Speaker 1: same time, maybe it's still chicken. It's just juice step chicken.

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Speaker 1: Have you ever seen the video of the chicken that

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Speaker 1: was coming It was like from a couple of years ago.

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Speaker 1: It's like a big gass chicken coming out of a

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Speaker 1: coop and it looks like foghorn Leghorn, like like he

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Speaker 1: comes out and it's bigger than the house, and it's

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Speaker 1: like it's got like decks and albs, and it's like,

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Speaker 1: what muscles, it looks like it's wearing like snow pants

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Speaker 1: and a full like bubble jacket. Yes, like that's that's

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Speaker 1: not a normal chicken. No, it looked like it just

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Speaker 1: got off a ski lift. It's huge. Those those videos

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Speaker 1: always bug me because there's always somebody who comes in

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Speaker 1: after words and it's like, well, that's actually the uh,

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Speaker 1: the doctor mccoka and chicken, and you wouldn't recognize it

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Speaker 1: from its big thick feathers, And it's like, bitch, if

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Speaker 1: that's been around this whole time, then you need to

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Speaker 1: let me know from the beginning, why are we Why

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Speaker 1: do we keep talking about these same six pokemon. I'm

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Speaker 1: trying to see, I'm trying to catch them, all right percent.

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Speaker 1: But I'm saying that, and I still eat meat. I'm

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Speaker 1: still gonna keep eating it, but I'm not eating that

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Speaker 1: hopefully because only by like the tiny like baby wings.

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Speaker 1: And that's when I'm cooking at my house. But I

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Speaker 1: don't know. The stuff that we eat is sometimes it's

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Speaker 1: kind of crazy, you know it is. And so so

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Speaker 1: with that, you you do hold a little bit of

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Speaker 1: fear from the stuff that your mother has said to

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Speaker 1: you about chicken and about these things from these restaurants.

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Speaker 1: I'm curious to know how much your mother is afraid

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Speaker 1: of other ethnic foods, Like is it just Chinese or

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Speaker 1: is she like, you know, the fish at Japanese restaurant,

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Speaker 1: you know that's radiated, that would make it clitter is long?

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Speaker 1: If that makes you clit long? Exactly you sound? Have you?

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Speaker 1: Did you speak to my mother today? We had a

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Speaker 1: phone call ahead of time because the little research on

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Speaker 1: may in other things that my mother doesn't eat and

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Speaker 1: would not buy for us. Ice cream from the ice

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Speaker 1: cream truck. WHOA, because she was like, they don't have

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Speaker 1: a bathroom on that truck. They pee in buckets on

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Speaker 1: that track, and then they don't wash their hands, and

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Speaker 1: they give you that SpongeBob ice cream with them pepe

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Speaker 1: hands and oh ship, fuck waiter guy, Hold on, what

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Speaker 1: the fuck? I that's never occurred to me. Where are

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Speaker 1: they peeing and pooping on the truck? You're on that

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Speaker 1: truck for for eight to ten hours a day, rolling

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Speaker 1: through neighborhoods, if not thing else, interacting with the grubby

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Speaker 1: little fingers of small children, and you know we don't

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Speaker 1: see any wash stations back there. This is devastating. My

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Speaker 1: Mom's like, you see, that's why they don't have the

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Speaker 1: windows back there, so like a poop on the trip

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, what, I just want to get a cone.

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Speaker 1: I got cones at the house, so I'll make your

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Speaker 1: ice cream. Baby, don't even trip about that. I'm churning

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Speaker 1: the cream right now. But we always had you know

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Speaker 1: the plus if that is, we always had ice cream

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Speaker 1: sandwiches at the house. But it was like, it's not

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Speaker 1: the same. I want to eat the truck ice cream. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: there's nothing like a hard earned ice cream from a

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Speaker 1: potential pedophile that makes you feel, you know what I mean,

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Speaker 1: like this man might snatch you. And that's kind of nice.

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Speaker 1: When you get the ice cream and you make it

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Speaker 1: home and there's music playing, and you're like, but she's

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Speaker 1: not buying that. She's never had sushi. She will never

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Speaker 1: have sushi. Sure, but I will say every year minus

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Speaker 1: this is when that just passed. But every New Year's

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Speaker 1: Eve we would go. We would take my mom to

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Speaker 1: habbachi and is the only thing that she would eat

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Speaker 1: because they cooked the food in front of you, and

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Speaker 1: she likes the little volcano. So you know, okay, she's

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Speaker 1: an onion volcano kind of girl. She ain't here for

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Speaker 1: ice cream off of trucks, but she's down. She said,

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Speaker 1: I'm watching to make the rice. She will not drink

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Speaker 1: miso soup though. She's like, this is hand wash water.

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Speaker 1: This is dirty hand wash water. So I guess this

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Speaker 1: is all very fascinating and groundbreaking stuff. And I guess

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Speaker 1: what comes to mind is why isn't she bothered by

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Speaker 1: the potential? Like there's no proof that that's chicken at

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Speaker 1: the habbachi right, like it comes damn near pre what

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Speaker 1: they served it to you, as they just chop it

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Speaker 1: up real fine. So she not she's not getting the chicken,

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Speaker 1: she's getting the shrimp because the shrimp is still shrimp

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Speaker 1: shape anything that is shaped like the thing that she

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Speaker 1: ordered exactly exactly. And even then, like she's watching us

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Speaker 1: eat our stuff and she's making faces and the dude

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Speaker 1: is clocked in looking at her face. She's at his job,

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Speaker 1: like no, and then you know, they go around and

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Speaker 1: they like like spray the saki in everybody's mouth. She

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Speaker 1: likes that. She's good at that. It's actually scary how

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Speaker 1: good at that she is. So she's here for the

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Speaker 1: turn up. She just say she ain't working around with

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Speaker 1: rare meats, new new, and nothing exotical. No exotic meats

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Speaker 1: at my mom's house, I mean at the restaurants. But

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Speaker 1: I mean it's funny and it makes me kind of

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Speaker 1: how I am right now. But like, I feel like

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Speaker 1: I have been cooking really well during the pandemic, and

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Speaker 1: then it got to the point that I was like, no,

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Speaker 1: I'm not watching another four that's fair. I'm not washing

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Speaker 1: another pan. I'm done cooking. And sometimes I'll just sit

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Speaker 1: here and be hungry for as like, well, I can't

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Speaker 1: eat out because those foreign meats might supposed to be

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Speaker 1: but I'm not cooking for myself. So yeah, But honestly,

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Speaker 1: this is like peek. This is the most in my

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Speaker 1: life that I've ever eating out, like ordered food out

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Speaker 1: and me and the delivery, Hey, how you doing? Come down?

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Speaker 1: But I just I'm at that point now where it's

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Speaker 1: like I'm gonna eat the fake meat, I'm gonna eat

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Speaker 1: the dirty hand washed water. I'm just gonna eat. It's

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Speaker 1: all I've I've always maintained that feeling, and I don't

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Speaker 1: know if it's good or bad, And I've expressed this

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Speaker 1: a few times, but my taste buds are are broken, right,

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Speaker 1: Like they don't work very well. I've I've had multiple

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Speaker 1: runnings where like people have been like, this is poison,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, I don't know. It tastes fine to me.

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Speaker 1: Is this because you're Is this because you're half way?

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Speaker 1: I reckon that that blaze is part I don't. I

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Speaker 1: don't know for sure. My dad similarly, does not seem

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Speaker 1: to have a very discerning palette, and that way like

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Speaker 1: maybe I just got his goofy ass mouth or maybe

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Speaker 1: it's the white devil's mouth and I got to unpack

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Speaker 1: that someday, okay, through this work. But I will say

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Speaker 1: that I've always taken solace in not knowing what the

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Speaker 1: ship is, because if I know too much, then I'm unhappy. Right,

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Speaker 1: if I just make peace with the fact that it

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Speaker 1: could be chicken, it could be a pile of recks,

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Speaker 1: and either way, this motherfucker tastes good with orange on it,

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Speaker 1: and it's like, okay, yeah, I'll be okay, it's good. Well,

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Speaker 1: can we talk about like what a McK nugget is? Like,

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Speaker 1: is that is where is all this chicken coming from?

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Speaker 1: Because it's like like, what is a nicknugget? And what

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Speaker 1: is Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because they can't call it that

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00:20:57,840 --> 00:21:01,880
Speaker 1: no more. It's just KFC. Yeah, they don't that they

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Speaker 1: can't call it. I think they can't call it Kentucky

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Speaker 1: Fried Chicken anymore. Oh the chicken is Wait, which part

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Speaker 1: of that that? Let's unpack this because which part of

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00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:17,879
Speaker 1: that k F and C is the problem? Is it

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Speaker 1: the K? Because if that's the problem, then that's fine,

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Speaker 1: they're not making it in Kentucky. But if it's the C,

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Speaker 1: then we've got a bigger issue. I think it might

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Speaker 1: be the C, but I've actually never thought maybe it's

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Speaker 1: the K. Maybe they can't call it Kentucky. May get

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Speaker 1: in Boston, like you got this in Albany. This is

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00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:49,080
Speaker 1: Kentucky Fried Chicken from Albuquerque's Albuquerque Fried Chicken. Wow. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I think maybe there's something a little easier in just

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Speaker 1: saying I don't know, and I'm at peace. But to

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Speaker 1: your mother's point, she's gonna live her life, maybe longer

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Speaker 1: and healthier, because she's like, I don't know, and I'm

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Speaker 1: not at peace, and I refuse to settle for any

356
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Speaker 1: unverified meats exactly, and my mother's skin looks great, and

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Speaker 1: she just puts vasselin on it. She don't use no serums,

358
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Speaker 1: no hyaluronic acid. She's putting put proleum jelly on her

359
00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:22,200
Speaker 1: face too, and her face still looks good. And it's like, well, sis,

360
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Speaker 1: I'm gonna use these serums, but alto eating, you know,

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Speaker 1: I eat stuff that she would never ever even put

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Speaker 1: in her mouth. Yeah, your mother is greasing up like

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Speaker 1: she's going to have a fist fight. And somehow she's

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Speaker 1: thriving me while the rest of us are fucking growing

365
00:22:36,280 --> 00:22:38,560
Speaker 1: boils out of our skin because we won't leave these

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Speaker 1: meats alone. And we're all depressed, and my mother is happy.

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Speaker 1: She's a beast, especially if there was an onion volcano nearby.

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Speaker 1: It sounds like she's a hundred percent at feasting her

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Speaker 1: best life. She's oh okay, it's like, all right, we're

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Speaker 1: gonna take a break. We'll be back with Mormari files More.

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Speaker 1: My mama told me the are that how is my

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Speaker 1: man supposed to schmeat his meat with this ship? Bro?

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Speaker 1: What the fuck? Yeah, we're back here with mar Marie Foston. More.

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Speaker 1: My mama told me, we're still talking about the unaccredited

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Speaker 1: meats that are possibly served at certain Chinese restaurants, and

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Speaker 1: whether or not that is in fact that the threat

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00:23:38,480 --> 00:23:41,159
Speaker 1: that Marie's mother has told her it is all these years.

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Speaker 1: I'm curious to know if she knows specifically what the

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Speaker 1: meat is. If it's not chicken, what is it? Oh?

380
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Speaker 1: On the phone with me yesterday, she listed literally every

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Speaker 1: single animal on all McDonald's farm except chicken. And I

382
00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:04,000
Speaker 1: was like, how do you don't even have any Asian friends? Right?

383
00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:07,000
Speaker 1: It's not like you like went to someone's house and

384
00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:10,720
Speaker 1: they served you and you like saw the door swing

385
00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:13,840
Speaker 1: open and you caught them like killing a snake. You

386
00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:17,760
Speaker 1: just you're pulling this out your booty, right, this is

387
00:24:17,840 --> 00:24:21,119
Speaker 1: just coming from a place of speculation. You you haven't

388
00:24:21,119 --> 00:24:24,159
Speaker 1: talked to an Asian person, You're not you're not checking

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00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:27,280
Speaker 1: in on any of your Chinese restaurant owners. This is

390
00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:32,080
Speaker 1: you're just making it up. But then she speaks in

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00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:34,680
Speaker 1: a way that you're like, well, what is General SOS?

392
00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:38,920
Speaker 1: But what is what is that? Who is that? That's

393
00:24:38,960 --> 00:24:41,840
Speaker 1: the question. That's an important question, And I don't think

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00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:44,560
Speaker 1: anybody truly knows. It was just I think General SO

395
00:24:44,880 --> 00:24:47,199
Speaker 1: was just a dude that white people made up to

396
00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:51,040
Speaker 1: be able to make chicken more palatable for everybody back

397
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Speaker 1: here in America. But who knows. I'm glad that your

398
00:24:55,480 --> 00:24:59,600
Speaker 1: mother talked a little bit about all these alternative meat substitutes,

399
00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:03,720
Speaker 1: because when I went going into the research and started

400
00:25:03,760 --> 00:25:06,200
Speaker 1: looking for some of these substitutes, one of the first

401
00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:09,159
Speaker 1: things that pops up is like all these people on

402
00:25:09,320 --> 00:25:13,200
Speaker 1: Cora and Reddit, all these awful places for doing any

403
00:25:13,240 --> 00:25:17,399
Speaker 1: sort of sincere research, basically claiming that the chicken and

404
00:25:17,520 --> 00:25:22,400
Speaker 1: beef at Chinese restaurants was everything from frog to jellyfish.

405
00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:25,199
Speaker 1: Like they went down the list of as you put it,

406
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:29,000
Speaker 1: old McDonald's farm and then included things like jellyfish and

407
00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:33,800
Speaker 1: snake and all these crazy fucking things that that jellyfish

408
00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:39,320
Speaker 1: jellyfish would be like chewy and slimy. Though, Yeah, it's

409
00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:43,320
Speaker 1: hard to make sense of what exactly they think. Which

410
00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:45,840
Speaker 1: part of the jellyfish is this? You know what I mean?

411
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Speaker 1: If we're worried about the McNugget, I at least can

412
00:25:48,119 --> 00:25:50,720
Speaker 1: make sense of where McNugget might come from in the chicken.

413
00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 1: There's no part of a jellyfish that's gonna make it

414
00:25:53,119 --> 00:25:59,640
Speaker 1: into a fucking you know, pat tie. Okay, So they

415
00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:03,159
Speaker 1: kill the jellyfish, then they freeze the jellyfish, and they

416
00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:07,720
Speaker 1: slice the frozen jellyfish, then they roll it in flour

417
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:19,480
Speaker 1: fry it, and then that's the that's a rip tip.

418
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:22,520
Speaker 1: That's a rip tip right there. And the bone he

419
00:26:23,119 --> 00:26:28,600
Speaker 1: ain't no telling, it's a tentacle. Right. The crazy part

420
00:26:28,680 --> 00:26:31,000
Speaker 1: to me of a lot of this is is that

421
00:26:31,680 --> 00:26:34,560
Speaker 1: even to to what your mother is suggesting it, the

422
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:40,160
Speaker 1: chicken is available everywhere, right. Chicken. We're constantly seeing them

423
00:26:40,160 --> 00:26:43,600
Speaker 1: on farms. Cows were constantly seeing them. We're literally being

424
00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:45,639
Speaker 1: told that cows are part of the reason this earth

425
00:26:45,760 --> 00:26:49,320
Speaker 1: is dying is because we won't stop mass producing cows

426
00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:53,000
Speaker 1: and they're farting and then it's fucking up our atmosphere. Right.

427
00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:56,320
Speaker 1: And the presumption that like these Chinese people are so

428
00:26:56,400 --> 00:27:00,760
Speaker 1: fucking sneaky that they somehow have boxes and and crates

429
00:27:00,800 --> 00:27:05,359
Speaker 1: of jellyfish instead of this easily accessible animal is a

430
00:27:05,359 --> 00:27:10,480
Speaker 1: little short sided. I'll say that that that part, Langston.

431
00:27:10,680 --> 00:27:14,320
Speaker 1: It's like, I mean, I've also never seen a Chinese

432
00:27:14,400 --> 00:27:17,800
Speaker 1: food restaurant that had like a delivery truck in front

433
00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:22,760
Speaker 1: of it dropping off crates of stuff so that. But yeah,

434
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:24,840
Speaker 1: I feel like it's easier to find a bunch of

435
00:27:24,880 --> 00:27:29,240
Speaker 1: chickens than it is to find a bunch of snakes. Yeah.

436
00:27:29,320 --> 00:27:31,399
Speaker 1: But like even with that, I know, I know a

437
00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:34,280
Speaker 1: nigger who will sell me one snake. I don't know

438
00:27:34,320 --> 00:27:37,040
Speaker 1: a mother who's gonna sell me a hundred and twelve,

439
00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:38,800
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Like, that's how much you

440
00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:41,040
Speaker 1: need to be able to make the meal that you're

441
00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:44,320
Speaker 1: supposing is being made out of this ship. So it's

442
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:47,240
Speaker 1: it's a little hard to believe. Yeah, I don't know

443
00:27:47,280 --> 00:27:55,040
Speaker 1: where the wholesale snake shop is. They're having a snake

444
00:27:55,119 --> 00:27:58,200
Speaker 1: clearance sale. It's just a big old pile of snakes.

445
00:27:58,240 --> 00:28:00,159
Speaker 1: You can you just sift through it. Like the it's

446
00:28:00,240 --> 00:28:03,240
Speaker 1: like every everything must go. It's like a wacky waving

447
00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:09,680
Speaker 1: inflatable arm dudeles leg but as snake shaped. Uh why

448
00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:11,639
Speaker 1: does he have arms? I don't know. We got real

449
00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:14,439
Speaker 1: confused in the promotion. The point is by some of

450
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:18,960
Speaker 1: these snakes, Yeah, going out of business. Everything must go.

451
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:21,879
Speaker 1: So do you eat out a lot? I do? I

452
00:28:21,920 --> 00:28:25,159
Speaker 1: eat out a ships on largely in that Um, I

453
00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:29,520
Speaker 1: am not a great cook, and uh I'm capable and

454
00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:31,800
Speaker 1: I should do it more often. But I'm also, uh,

455
00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:34,560
Speaker 1: I got a prisoner in my wife, and so I'm

456
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:37,320
Speaker 1: gonna make her cook as often as I can. I

457
00:28:37,400 --> 00:28:39,480
Speaker 1: do the cleaning, so I make up for it on

458
00:28:39,520 --> 00:28:41,920
Speaker 1: the back of Okay, so you ain't got no dishwashers

459
00:28:41,960 --> 00:28:46,000
Speaker 1: what you're saying, Oh no, I'm the dishwasher. I'm the dishwasher,

460
00:28:46,120 --> 00:28:48,600
Speaker 1: and uh that's where the party is, you know what

461
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:53,320
Speaker 1: I mean. I don't think I ever feel, even when

462
00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:57,560
Speaker 1: I'm eating out though, any concern that like I'm being

463
00:28:57,680 --> 00:29:01,880
Speaker 1: bamboozled by the meat that I'm served. I don't know.

464
00:29:02,000 --> 00:29:05,080
Speaker 1: I was eating out with a friend like maybe like

465
00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:07,360
Speaker 1: six or seven years ago. It wasn't my friend, it's

466
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:11,720
Speaker 1: my ex boyfriend. Here's my boyfriend at the time, so nobody.

467
00:29:11,800 --> 00:29:15,760
Speaker 1: So we got food and he was eating. He was like,

468
00:29:15,800 --> 00:29:19,920
Speaker 1: the texture is wrong. Like he was like, this is

469
00:29:20,040 --> 00:29:23,640
Speaker 1: not chicken. And I was I was like, well, that's

470
00:29:23,640 --> 00:29:29,280
Speaker 1: why I got the wings. See mine shaped like chicken.

471
00:29:29,320 --> 00:29:32,480
Speaker 1: Stuff shaped like chicken. So I mean, if it's if

472
00:29:32,520 --> 00:29:35,560
Speaker 1: this is not chicken, then my you know, my props

473
00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:41,400
Speaker 1: to the to the artist because they got the shape perfect.

474
00:29:41,760 --> 00:29:43,560
Speaker 1: But he was like, the texture is wrong, he starts

475
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:46,920
Speaker 1: spitting it out. I was like, oh, that's terrible. I said,

476
00:29:46,920 --> 00:29:48,520
Speaker 1: you can't have that to my food, But you could

477
00:29:48,520 --> 00:29:52,000
Speaker 1: have this little broccoli, right, you know that broccoli that

478
00:29:52,040 --> 00:29:54,480
Speaker 1: they just put in because I guess it looks better.

479
00:29:54,560 --> 00:29:57,160
Speaker 1: You get that, but you can't. Yeah, yeah, a little

480
00:29:57,200 --> 00:29:59,920
Speaker 1: it's green. So that's it's broccoli that counts as divided

481
00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:03,040
Speaker 1: for the week. So one of the things that that

482
00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:06,440
Speaker 1: I discovered in unpacking a lot of this research is

483
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:09,080
Speaker 1: that a lot of it is rooted in this sort

484
00:30:09,080 --> 00:30:13,080
Speaker 1: of racist theory that Chinese people are serving up dogs

485
00:30:13,080 --> 00:30:15,719
Speaker 1: and cats, right, like that's the go to thing, and

486
00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:19,360
Speaker 1: specifically dog. I think it's like the go to one

487
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:22,840
Speaker 1: that a lot of people speculate that Chinese people serve.

488
00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:28,840
Speaker 1: And it turns out that it's not completely disconnected from

489
00:30:28,960 --> 00:30:32,440
Speaker 1: a a type of Chinese history, right that all the

490
00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:37,000
Speaker 1: way back to UH seventeen hundred BC. They can actually

491
00:30:37,080 --> 00:30:42,280
Speaker 1: trace a history of Chinese people eating dog that like

492
00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:45,720
Speaker 1: all the way back in ancient China. These motherfucker's used

493
00:30:45,720 --> 00:30:50,200
Speaker 1: to eat dogs because apparently, in ancient China, dogs and

494
00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:56,040
Speaker 1: dog meat were considered important offerings to ancestors and sacrificial

495
00:30:56,160 --> 00:31:02,200
Speaker 1: foods to God's any specific breed dog just they need

496
00:31:02,280 --> 00:31:05,960
Speaker 1: to dog. My guess is that back in sevent BC,

497
00:31:06,160 --> 00:31:08,560
Speaker 1: there were like four dogs, you know what I mean,

498
00:31:08,640 --> 00:31:11,160
Speaker 1: Like how there's there's all these weird ones now a

499
00:31:11,280 --> 00:31:15,400
Speaker 1: lossy pool and a pug and like all this ship's

500
00:31:15,440 --> 00:31:18,440
Speaker 1: back then there were four dogs. It was like a

501
00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:23,200
Speaker 1: golden shepherd or golden retriever and a black lab and

502
00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:25,560
Speaker 1: you got to pick. I'll take golden and I'll take black,

503
00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:27,640
Speaker 1: and you ate that ship. It was a white dog,

504
00:31:27,760 --> 00:31:30,160
Speaker 1: a black dog, a brown dog, and then a great

505
00:31:30,160 --> 00:31:35,520
Speaker 1: dog like oh that wasn't a great dog in the night,

506
00:31:36,120 --> 00:31:38,320
Speaker 1: and y'all would y'all have some gray? If I ordered

507
00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:41,240
Speaker 1: some gray, I'm a great great dog for the table.

508
00:31:41,600 --> 00:31:44,320
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah yeah. Don't let me eat a dog.

509
00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:51,120
Speaker 1: I got to fit into my prom dress. So sorry

510
00:31:51,120 --> 00:31:54,160
Speaker 1: for being problematic. Sorry, don't cancel me. No, this is fine.

511
00:31:54,640 --> 00:32:00,280
Speaker 1: They had brown back then. Uh And even turn turns

512
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:05,320
Speaker 1: out that the Chinese character for to offer contains the

513
00:32:05,400 --> 00:32:09,480
Speaker 1: character of dog, right like, it's the same symbol sort

514
00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:13,719
Speaker 1: of cooked into the character that it means to offer.

515
00:32:14,160 --> 00:32:19,040
Speaker 1: That said, this practice died out a long time ago,

516
00:32:19,280 --> 00:32:23,680
Speaker 1: right like over the years, people basically, like everything started

517
00:32:23,720 --> 00:32:27,960
Speaker 1: to build up a morality about dogs and the treatment

518
00:32:28,040 --> 00:32:30,680
Speaker 1: of dogs, and it wasn't It's basically around like the

519
00:32:30,720 --> 00:32:35,240
Speaker 1: tenth century and the popularization of Buddhism that people started

520
00:32:35,280 --> 00:32:38,560
Speaker 1: to look at killing dogs it's bad karma. They basically

521
00:32:38,560 --> 00:32:41,040
Speaker 1: went like, oh, these dogs are are cool at fuck.

522
00:32:41,160 --> 00:32:43,720
Speaker 1: I don't think we should be killing them anymore. That's bad. Look,

523
00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:45,960
Speaker 1: but I kicked this dog and he's still my friend.

524
00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:53,040
Speaker 1: I like this, nigga, Yes more, yeah, be done with

525
00:32:53,080 --> 00:33:02,160
Speaker 1: the gray ones and black ones will kill them. And

526
00:33:02,160 --> 00:33:05,160
Speaker 1: then they're like, oh, it turns out those dogs are wolves. Cool?

527
00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:12,280
Speaker 1: How so this keeps going right, And then during the

528
00:33:12,280 --> 00:33:16,360
Speaker 1: the Cultural Revolution in China, this dude MoU Zy Dog

529
00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:21,480
Speaker 1: basically banned raising dogs for like pets, as like a

530
00:33:22,240 --> 00:33:27,040
Speaker 1: bourgeois pastime, and during the Great Famine that followed, peasants

531
00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:30,560
Speaker 1: basically would eat there the dog meat just like any

532
00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:33,560
Speaker 1: other animal that could lay their hands on. Because it's

533
00:33:33,600 --> 00:33:37,440
Speaker 1: the Great Famine. We're hungry as fuck. Dogs are around

534
00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:41,000
Speaker 1: and we for at least a time, we're raising them

535
00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:43,040
Speaker 1: as our pets, but now we ain't got no food.

536
00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:48,760
Speaker 1: So shiit scruffy looking, really scrump shits right now, that

537
00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:53,200
Speaker 1: is so wild. But like when you think about the

538
00:33:53,240 --> 00:33:56,920
Speaker 1: meat that we do eat, it's like like it could

539
00:33:56,920 --> 00:34:03,240
Speaker 1: have been anything, right, we've decided pork not everybody, but

540
00:34:03,280 --> 00:34:07,000
Speaker 1: like pork, beef and chicken are like acceptable. But it's

541
00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:11,000
Speaker 1: like chickens could have Like they just I don't know,

542
00:34:11,040 --> 00:34:13,399
Speaker 1: they rolled a bad hand because they could have been

543
00:34:13,680 --> 00:34:17,319
Speaker 1: pets too. Yeah, chickens pr people just weren't on it

544
00:34:17,400 --> 00:34:19,120
Speaker 1: the way that they were supposed to be, And now

545
00:34:19,160 --> 00:34:22,479
Speaker 1: we're going fucking crazy for chicken. Everybody can make peace

546
00:34:22,480 --> 00:34:24,759
Speaker 1: with the eating your chicken, but these dogs thing doing

547
00:34:24,880 --> 00:34:28,640
Speaker 1: that much, literally no, and sometimes they pee in your

548
00:34:28,640 --> 00:34:32,160
Speaker 1: house and and cats scratch up your couch. But like

549
00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:36,080
Speaker 1: cats are like, for whatever reason, cats have always been

550
00:34:36,080 --> 00:34:39,240
Speaker 1: I think, pretty high up on the totem pole of pets,

551
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:43,600
Speaker 1: like from like ancient Egypt times. Like, yeah, they're mean

552
00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:46,799
Speaker 1: and people don't want to eat them. Everybody recognizes that

553
00:34:46,880 --> 00:34:51,320
Speaker 1: cats potentially could murder them, and so they're like respect

554
00:34:51,800 --> 00:34:54,279
Speaker 1: respect to you and your work. I recognize that you're

555
00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:57,160
Speaker 1: at least intelligent enough to know that I deserve to die.

556
00:34:57,360 --> 00:35:01,560
Speaker 1: I'll leave you alone. Whereas dog, it's like it's a

557
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:04,480
Speaker 1: loyal slave, so yeah, I might eat my slave eventually.

558
00:35:05,280 --> 00:35:08,360
Speaker 1: So this keeps going right, And so it sounds like

559
00:35:08,840 --> 00:35:11,960
Speaker 1: that after a while, we uh, you know, people, the

560
00:35:12,040 --> 00:35:15,240
Speaker 1: famine ends, people become normal again and they start treating

561
00:35:15,320 --> 00:35:20,120
Speaker 1: dogs again like regular sort of pets. And it sounds like,

562
00:35:20,200 --> 00:35:23,200
Speaker 1: because of this history with dogs and dog meat that

563
00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:26,040
Speaker 1: it's not until the nineties that they really begin to

564
00:35:26,080 --> 00:35:30,240
Speaker 1: seeing a resurgence of dogs as pets in big cities.

565
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:33,920
Speaker 1: That for yeah, that for a while they just kind

566
00:35:33,960 --> 00:35:37,040
Speaker 1: of like leave dogs alone. They're like, yeah, we had

567
00:35:37,040 --> 00:35:39,439
Speaker 1: a bad history. We ate the motherfuckers, so we can't

568
00:35:39,480 --> 00:35:42,319
Speaker 1: like be hanging out with them afterwards. And then it

569
00:35:42,400 --> 00:35:45,560
Speaker 1: isn't until like very very late that like Chinese people

570
00:35:45,719 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 1: re established dogs. It's like a household pet that is wild.

571
00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:54,440
Speaker 1: Mm hmmm, I'm learning a lot. This is crazy, and

572
00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:59,799
Speaker 1: you keep in mind, I go to like four websites,

573
00:35:59,840 --> 00:36:01,840
Speaker 1: so I could be wrong, and I have a feeling

574
00:36:01,840 --> 00:36:04,319
Speaker 1: We're gonna get some hate mail from this one, but

575
00:36:04,360 --> 00:36:07,480
Speaker 1: I'm excited to read what people have to say. The

576
00:36:08,360 --> 00:36:12,000
Speaker 1: part that I think gets the most attention, and this

577
00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:15,600
Speaker 1: is where all of like the dog eating of China

578
00:36:15,760 --> 00:36:18,759
Speaker 1: really comes from is that they're still to this day

579
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:22,880
Speaker 1: a festival in this place called you Land, uh. And

580
00:36:22,920 --> 00:36:26,560
Speaker 1: the festival is called the Leechy Dog and Meat Festival,

581
00:36:26,920 --> 00:36:30,080
Speaker 1: where the people of that city in Youland do, in

582
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:34,200
Speaker 1: fact eat dog as a as an holdmage to their ancestors.

583
00:36:34,680 --> 00:36:36,880
Speaker 1: Now are they eating dog? And they eating hot dogs?

584
00:36:37,000 --> 00:36:40,759
Speaker 1: Because I've seen the hot dog eating contest and there's

585
00:36:40,760 --> 00:36:44,080
Speaker 1: always like a real loule Asian dude that shoving like

586
00:36:45,040 --> 00:36:48,719
Speaker 1: dogs in his face, and I will say equally disgusting.

587
00:36:48,960 --> 00:36:52,319
Speaker 1: I don't think the little motherfucker stuff in ninety eight

588
00:36:52,360 --> 00:36:54,919
Speaker 1: dogs is gross to me. Big old what's his name,

589
00:36:55,000 --> 00:36:59,400
Speaker 1: Joe the Nathan's Hot Dog Champion, That big white motherfucker

590
00:36:59,440 --> 00:37:03,720
Speaker 1: he's it's like yeah, yeah, they like dip the bread

591
00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:09,279
Speaker 1: in water and they're just like, yeah, nasty bitch, what

592
00:37:09,360 --> 00:37:16,200
Speaker 1: are you doing that for? It? You him? Like whatever

593
00:37:16,239 --> 00:37:19,480
Speaker 1: his name is, Joe Saxophone, I can't remember his goddamn name,

594
00:37:19,520 --> 00:37:22,319
Speaker 1: but he's a nasty bitch and I don't care for him.

595
00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:26,280
Speaker 1: But that said, it's this one festival in this one city,

596
00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:30,320
Speaker 1: in one of the most populated countries on this planet

597
00:37:30,360 --> 00:37:33,200
Speaker 1: Earth that does the thing. And it's so sort of

598
00:37:33,239 --> 00:37:37,799
Speaker 1: like um polarizing that even the city, like the spokespeople

599
00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:40,080
Speaker 1: are like, yeah, we ain't got nothing to do with that.

600
00:37:40,080 --> 00:37:43,480
Speaker 1: That's just like a few wild people in our in

601
00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:46,520
Speaker 1: our city. We don't in Chinese people basically say we

602
00:37:46,600 --> 00:37:49,839
Speaker 1: don't want this to be a reflection of our entire identity,

603
00:37:50,160 --> 00:37:53,439
Speaker 1: and instead people do it anyway, and it just sort

604
00:37:53,480 --> 00:37:57,480
Speaker 1: of speaks to how absurd it is that we're using

605
00:37:57,560 --> 00:38:00,759
Speaker 1: this one instance to be a reflection of everything that

606
00:38:00,840 --> 00:38:04,880
Speaker 1: happens in an entire place that is wild. And my

607
00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:07,840
Speaker 1: mother doesn't know any of those things, but she in

608
00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:12,440
Speaker 1: the back of her mind she does. Maybe she maybe

609
00:38:12,440 --> 00:38:14,640
Speaker 1: that's where she went all her honeymoon, and she was like,

610
00:38:14,760 --> 00:38:17,600
Speaker 1: this is I'm never eating Chinese food again. I don't

611
00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:19,520
Speaker 1: I don't want to number three or a number two.

612
00:38:19,640 --> 00:38:21,919
Speaker 1: I don't want I don't want the dumplings. I don't

613
00:38:21,920 --> 00:38:25,799
Speaker 1: want none of this sheet. I will say. I will say,

614
00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:29,600
Speaker 1: having been to China, I did eat the weirdest stuff

615
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:32,640
Speaker 1: that I've ever eaten in that place. But none of

616
00:38:32,640 --> 00:38:35,319
Speaker 1: it was a surprise. They weren't tricking me into the

617
00:38:35,360 --> 00:38:39,320
Speaker 1: ship like that's like I ate starfish. That was fucking gross.

618
00:38:39,640 --> 00:38:43,440
Speaker 1: I scorpion. I ate, uh, I duck eggs. That's the

619
00:38:43,440 --> 00:38:46,680
Speaker 1: worst thing. I ate his duck eggs. Was it like scrambled?

620
00:38:46,719 --> 00:38:50,080
Speaker 1: Was it over easy? I ate a boiled duck egg.

621
00:38:50,320 --> 00:38:53,759
Speaker 1: You know, I with photos there's the negative, like the

622
00:38:53,760 --> 00:38:56,040
Speaker 1: old like you get the sheet of the negatives. That's

623
00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:58,799
Speaker 1: the duck egg looks like to a chicken egg. It's

624
00:38:58,840 --> 00:39:01,680
Speaker 1: like black or right on the outside where the yell

625
00:39:01,920 --> 00:39:03,919
Speaker 1: you know, where the white would be in the yolk.

626
00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:07,200
Speaker 1: It's like a different color as well. Are you sure

627
00:39:07,239 --> 00:39:09,879
Speaker 1: you had Maybe it was a bad duck egg. That's

628
00:39:10,040 --> 00:39:13,360
Speaker 1: very possible. I was not checking all the duck eggs

629
00:39:13,360 --> 00:39:15,719
Speaker 1: to know which ones were good or bad. A mother

630
00:39:16,080 --> 00:39:18,399
Speaker 1: just handed me and was like, duck egg. I was like, yeah,

631
00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:23,320
Speaker 1: hell yeah yeah, And he's like and then he watched

632
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:28,799
Speaker 1: you just you're like that was that was nice? I

633
00:39:28,840 --> 00:39:31,399
Speaker 1: love your culture. It was just a rich history here

634
00:39:31,440 --> 00:39:37,919
Speaker 1: that I can't get enough up. What else did you eat?

635
00:39:37,960 --> 00:39:40,920
Speaker 1: Did you have frog legs? Those are all pretty wild though.

636
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,440
Speaker 1: I think the wildest thing was I had this wine

637
00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:48,600
Speaker 1: that was made with turtle and uh, snake fermenting in

638
00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:52,000
Speaker 1: the bottom, like much in the way that tequila has

639
00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:54,640
Speaker 1: like a worm sitting on the bottom. This had a

640
00:39:54,680 --> 00:39:57,600
Speaker 1: big gass turtle with no shell and a snake at

641
00:39:57,640 --> 00:39:59,600
Speaker 1: the bottom of the wine. And I was there with

642
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:02,000
Speaker 1: my and they have been getting on my nerves. So

643
00:40:02,040 --> 00:40:03,640
Speaker 1: I was like, give me some of that wine, dog,

644
00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:06,720
Speaker 1: and I had it and then my teeth went numb,

645
00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:12,920
Speaker 1: and I was like, no more, please, enough snake juice

646
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:15,600
Speaker 1: for me, sir. Wait, wait, hold on. First of all,

647
00:40:16,040 --> 00:40:18,680
Speaker 1: how do you even recognize a turtle if it's not

648
00:40:19,200 --> 00:40:23,319
Speaker 1: wearing a show? Because oh, you know, I feel like

649
00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:26,280
Speaker 1: if I saw a turtle without a shell in liquid,

650
00:40:26,360 --> 00:40:28,680
Speaker 1: I would think that it was I don't know, a

651
00:40:28,800 --> 00:40:31,879
Speaker 1: teddy bear with alpa, Like, I don't know, how did

652
00:40:31,920 --> 00:40:35,600
Speaker 1: you a turtle? I'd be like, well, lizard is that? Yeah,

653
00:40:35,640 --> 00:40:37,880
Speaker 1: I don't know. If you see it, and you're like,

654
00:40:38,200 --> 00:40:41,120
Speaker 1: either that lizard got wings, so that's a mother fucking turtle.

655
00:40:41,520 --> 00:40:44,640
Speaker 1: It's got that long that long middle or that wide middle,

656
00:40:44,680 --> 00:40:48,560
Speaker 1: and you're like, that's a mothering turtle. Uh? Oh is

657
00:40:48,560 --> 00:40:51,720
Speaker 1: a turtle? The shape of the shell, Yeah, it turns

658
00:40:51,719 --> 00:40:54,520
Speaker 1: out there not inside the shell as much as they

659
00:40:54,560 --> 00:40:59,000
Speaker 1: are attached. The shell is a part of their their body.

660
00:40:59,040 --> 00:41:02,600
Speaker 1: It's just protected their inside They're not like snails that

661
00:41:02,640 --> 00:41:07,719
Speaker 1: abandoned the shell later. They that's permanent. I thought it

662
00:41:07,760 --> 00:41:10,960
Speaker 1: was a jacket, but you're saying that it's that's his skin.

663
00:41:11,360 --> 00:41:13,479
Speaker 1: Got it, gotta got it, got it, got it. So

664
00:41:13,680 --> 00:41:17,040
Speaker 1: I started to try to unpack exactly what the meat

665
00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:22,879
Speaker 1: in Chinese food restaurants is, right. I wanted to make

666
00:41:22,880 --> 00:41:26,120
Speaker 1: sure that that while we can confirm that there's a

667
00:41:26,120 --> 00:41:29,520
Speaker 1: fair amount of racism that comes in and claiming these

668
00:41:29,640 --> 00:41:33,319
Speaker 1: unverified meats are the meat, we should know exactly what

669
00:41:33,520 --> 00:41:36,400
Speaker 1: makes this meat so different when we eat it. And

670
00:41:36,440 --> 00:41:39,120
Speaker 1: it turns out that there are a few arguments. But

671
00:41:39,160 --> 00:41:42,320
Speaker 1: one of the things that people said is that Chinese

672
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:46,360
Speaker 1: people commonly use chicken thighs instead of other parts of

673
00:41:46,400 --> 00:41:49,640
Speaker 1: the chicken. So it's not breast, it's not wing, it's

674
00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:53,680
Speaker 1: chicken thigh because that meat is easier to tenderize, easier

675
00:41:53,719 --> 00:41:58,000
Speaker 1: to marinate, and also cheaper and juicy. It stays juicy

676
00:41:58,080 --> 00:42:01,080
Speaker 1: for longer than any of the other meat. And then

677
00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:03,400
Speaker 1: there's this other thing that I read that was a

678
00:42:03,400 --> 00:42:07,080
Speaker 1: little more jarring, but also still about chicken. They basically

679
00:42:07,080 --> 00:42:09,920
Speaker 1: said that that Chinese people aren't serving fake chicken. They

680
00:42:09,960 --> 00:42:15,200
Speaker 1: actually use tougher cuts and slice them super thin, and

681
00:42:15,239 --> 00:42:19,359
Speaker 1: then they marinate them overnight in this solution called sodium

682
00:42:19,840 --> 00:42:25,080
Speaker 1: by carbonate, and then that allows them, after washing it away,

683
00:42:25,120 --> 00:42:28,560
Speaker 1: allows for that tent, that super tough meat to become

684
00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:32,680
Speaker 1: almost more rubbery and bouncy in the way that the

685
00:42:32,719 --> 00:42:36,040
Speaker 1: meat sometimes taste when you're eating it at the restaurants.

686
00:42:36,120 --> 00:42:38,360
Speaker 1: And so it basically is this way of getting the

687
00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:42,799
Speaker 1: cheap meat and turning it into sellable meat through this

688
00:42:42,920 --> 00:42:48,879
Speaker 1: overnight soaking process. They ain't eating uh fucking turtles. Yeah yeah, yeah,

689
00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:54,560
Speaker 1: yeah yeah. So I'm not offering you healing. I'm just

690
00:42:54,719 --> 00:42:58,640
Speaker 1: offering you more of a clear understanding of why you

691
00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:05,160
Speaker 1: shouldn't be eating out any time. One of the things

692
00:43:05,239 --> 00:43:07,879
Speaker 1: that I discovered though, is, and what really is more

693
00:43:07,880 --> 00:43:11,160
Speaker 1: of a question that I found myself asking with all

694
00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:16,160
Speaker 1: of this, is how different is this from so many

695
00:43:16,200 --> 00:43:20,160
Speaker 1: of the other situations we see in other restaurants in

696
00:43:20,239 --> 00:43:23,680
Speaker 1: relation to them selling us bullshit? Right? Like, I don't

697
00:43:23,680 --> 00:43:26,160
Speaker 1: know if you remember when McDonald's had to make that

698
00:43:26,200 --> 00:43:28,800
Speaker 1: big announcement that they would no longer be putting pink

699
00:43:28,840 --> 00:43:33,719
Speaker 1: slime in their food that just for years, So what

700
00:43:33,800 --> 00:43:36,480
Speaker 1: was the pink slime. I think it was just like

701
00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:41,200
Speaker 1: a blended mush of organs and bullshit that they like,

702
00:43:41,400 --> 00:43:44,440
Speaker 1: we're adding to meat to make it fuller and less.

703
00:43:45,040 --> 00:43:46,680
Speaker 1: You know, you want to. If you say you got

704
00:43:46,719 --> 00:43:49,000
Speaker 1: a quarter pound patty, they can afford to give you

705
00:43:49,280 --> 00:43:53,040
Speaker 1: a fucking quarter pound of beef. That's expensive, but not

706
00:43:53,600 --> 00:43:57,839
Speaker 1: for no two, no, not for no exactly. So they

707
00:43:57,880 --> 00:43:59,960
Speaker 1: give you a little drop of meat and they get

708
00:44:00,040 --> 00:44:02,799
Speaker 1: you a whole lot of slime. You get, you getting beak,

709
00:44:03,040 --> 00:44:07,040
Speaker 1: club greens, tomatoes you're getting, You get some lips, you

710
00:44:07,120 --> 00:44:13,400
Speaker 1: get some asshole you're getting, You're getting eyelash. That's nasty.

711
00:44:13,520 --> 00:44:16,719
Speaker 1: Do you know Olivia is saying? Pink slime is a

712
00:44:16,760 --> 00:44:20,880
Speaker 1: meat byproduct used as a food additive to ground beef

713
00:44:20,920 --> 00:44:24,360
Speaker 1: and beef based processed meats as a filler or to

714
00:44:24,480 --> 00:44:27,920
Speaker 1: reduce overall fat content of ground beef in the production

715
00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:31,640
Speaker 1: process heat. It's basically to fill out the meat. New

716
00:44:31,840 --> 00:44:34,960
Speaker 1: Do you remember a couple of years ago somebody got

717
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:39,719
Speaker 1: a McDonald's meal. It was like fries, burger, some nuggets

718
00:44:39,960 --> 00:44:43,399
Speaker 1: and something else, and they had the food sitting out

719
00:44:43,480 --> 00:44:46,160
Speaker 1: for a year and took a picture of it every

720
00:44:46,200 --> 00:44:50,400
Speaker 1: single day for a year. Bread never got moldy that

721
00:44:50,880 --> 00:44:54,719
Speaker 1: like the meat, the fries stayed fried shape, and it

722
00:44:54,840 --> 00:44:59,399
Speaker 1: was like, well, what is all that stuff? Sure bread

723
00:44:59,520 --> 00:45:01,799
Speaker 1: is a post to get mold on it, dude, the

724
00:45:01,880 --> 00:45:04,239
Speaker 1: bread is not even real bread. Maybe the bread got

725
00:45:04,239 --> 00:45:07,799
Speaker 1: pink sliming is oh my god. And I would say,

726
00:45:07,880 --> 00:45:09,839
Speaker 1: there's one part of you that could be like, this

727
00:45:09,880 --> 00:45:12,839
Speaker 1: is horrible, what a terrible thing that they're feeding us

728
00:45:12,880 --> 00:45:14,960
Speaker 1: and putting in our bodies. And there's another part of

729
00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:17,719
Speaker 1: me that argues that means they're the greatest restaurant in

730
00:45:17,719 --> 00:45:20,719
Speaker 1: the history of the world because they keep serving us

731
00:45:20,760 --> 00:45:24,359
Speaker 1: this ship and I can't tell the difference. I think

732
00:45:24,400 --> 00:45:26,880
Speaker 1: it's delightful, So what the funny. I'm not gonna be

733
00:45:26,920 --> 00:45:29,840
Speaker 1: unhappy about it. Much to my earlier point. You served

734
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:31,960
Speaker 1: it to me and I enjoyed it. I don't need

735
00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:35,280
Speaker 1: to know what's in it. We love to see Langston

736
00:45:35,400 --> 00:45:46,600
Speaker 1: smile bot he's eating it. Somebody will eat it. That's

737
00:45:46,680 --> 00:45:50,399
Speaker 1: the new catch phrase. Not I said the cat, I'm not.

738
00:45:50,880 --> 00:45:53,399
Speaker 1: I mean. I also don't eat fast food really at all.

739
00:45:53,520 --> 00:45:57,200
Speaker 1: So there's that that that's fair, I think, and you

740
00:45:57,239 --> 00:46:00,920
Speaker 1: have every right and it's probably the more responsible choice

741
00:46:00,960 --> 00:46:04,160
Speaker 1: like there was years ago they burger King got in trouble.

742
00:46:04,200 --> 00:46:06,360
Speaker 1: I think it was in the UK for selling horse

743
00:46:06,480 --> 00:46:10,839
Speaker 1: meat instead of fucking burger meat or you know, cow meat.

744
00:46:11,360 --> 00:46:14,719
Speaker 1: But again, it's not like somebody bit into the motherfucker

745
00:46:14,760 --> 00:46:19,880
Speaker 1: and new, hey, this is what the fun this is horse? Hey, hey,

746
00:46:20,280 --> 00:46:26,680
Speaker 1: hey jack, this is horse. It's like this is come

747
00:46:26,719 --> 00:46:28,400
Speaker 1: to this burger King every day for lunch, just like

748
00:46:29,040 --> 00:46:32,359
Speaker 1: exactly I've never had. And honestly, it was probably a

749
00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:35,600
Speaker 1: disgruntled worker who was like they fired him on a

750
00:46:35,680 --> 00:46:37,520
Speaker 1: bad day and then he was like, all right, I'm

751
00:46:37,560 --> 00:46:42,320
Speaker 1: gonna tell these motherfucker's you cooking horseback here like Bergking's like,

752
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:44,359
Speaker 1: damn you blowing up our spot like that. All right,

753
00:46:44,520 --> 00:46:50,080
Speaker 1: fine you could stay, you can have Saturday off, but okay,

754
00:46:50,160 --> 00:46:52,640
Speaker 1: come back, you could have it off. This hill man

755
00:46:52,800 --> 00:46:58,280
Speaker 1: don't know telling our secret. Then there's other examples like uh,

756
00:46:58,280 --> 00:47:00,080
Speaker 1: and this is more of a room or than a

757
00:47:00,239 --> 00:47:03,640
Speaker 1: fact that this falls far closer to conspiracy theory. But

758
00:47:03,760 --> 00:47:06,120
Speaker 1: my friend, uh, a dear friend, you know him, Ryan

759
00:47:06,160 --> 00:47:11,200
Speaker 1: Donahue once told me the story that like calamari in

760
00:47:11,560 --> 00:47:15,520
Speaker 1: UH restaurants and specifically like bad restaurants, it's not in

761
00:47:15,560 --> 00:47:19,719
Speaker 1: fact calamari, but it's in fact cow ees that like

762
00:47:20,200 --> 00:47:22,600
Speaker 1: they'll like chop up the little booty hole of a

763
00:47:22,680 --> 00:47:26,960
Speaker 1: cow and served that as calamari. And again, how the

764
00:47:27,120 --> 00:47:30,040
Speaker 1: funk would you know the difference? Wait? Wait wait wait

765
00:47:30,040 --> 00:47:31,719
Speaker 1: wait wait wait wait wait wait wait, hold on, hold on,

766
00:47:31,760 --> 00:47:37,400
Speaker 1: hold on. This affects me personally, calamari Calamari is just cows.

767
00:47:38,719 --> 00:47:41,360
Speaker 1: But I don't know. I don't know. I'm not saying

768
00:47:41,400 --> 00:47:44,000
Speaker 1: it is. I'm saying that this is a theory that's

769
00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:47,200
Speaker 1: floating around the world, and maybe it's better if we

770
00:47:47,320 --> 00:47:51,200
Speaker 1: don't know, if we never find out that it's cowing. Well, okay,

771
00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:56,560
Speaker 1: what counts as a cheap restaurant, because like, how much

772
00:47:56,600 --> 00:48:01,560
Speaker 1: money should I not be spending on calamari are don't look,

773
00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:04,440
Speaker 1: don't get it at Benigans. If you were going to Benigans,

774
00:48:04,480 --> 00:48:06,120
Speaker 1: if that was where you were, like this is my

775
00:48:06,280 --> 00:48:08,440
Speaker 1: night out on the town, I would say, don't get

776
00:48:08,480 --> 00:48:11,680
Speaker 1: the calamari there. I don't know where Benigans is, but

777
00:48:11,800 --> 00:48:15,960
Speaker 1: like that the Fridays like, oh yeah, it's the same

778
00:48:16,080 --> 00:48:19,839
Speaker 1: quality it Benigans, I think is a defunct restaurant. It's

779
00:48:19,880 --> 00:48:24,800
Speaker 1: t g I Friday's Rising. If you will oh oh, okay,

780
00:48:24,880 --> 00:48:27,360
Speaker 1: I was gonna say Roy Rogers, but okay, yeah, t

781
00:48:27,480 --> 00:48:32,520
Speaker 1: G Fridays at the end of the day. Part of

782
00:48:32,560 --> 00:48:35,400
Speaker 1: what what I I sort of found myself asking is

783
00:48:35,480 --> 00:48:38,520
Speaker 1: how do any of us truly know that what we're eating?

784
00:48:39,440 --> 00:48:41,920
Speaker 1: If they tell us we're eating swordfish, how can we

785
00:48:42,080 --> 00:48:45,359
Speaker 1: prove that it is in fact swordfish? Right, it's all.

786
00:48:46,480 --> 00:48:50,560
Speaker 1: It's all Telapia. I love that. There you go and

787
00:48:50,600 --> 00:48:53,680
Speaker 1: so and so. You have two alternatives in this scenario.

788
00:48:53,760 --> 00:48:57,040
Speaker 1: You either follow what I'm doing and you continue to

789
00:48:57,080 --> 00:48:59,920
Speaker 1: eat whatever they offer you and you make peace with that,

790
00:49:00,239 --> 00:49:04,759
Speaker 1: or you follow Marie and her mother's uh process and

791
00:49:04,800 --> 00:49:07,720
Speaker 1: you decide to stay at home and never eat out again,

792
00:49:07,840 --> 00:49:11,239
Speaker 1: and that's probably healthier and you'll live longer. But or

793
00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:14,080
Speaker 1: you won't because you're staying home and you're not cooking,

794
00:49:14,160 --> 00:49:18,640
Speaker 1: and you're sitting in your purple living room. You are famished,

795
00:49:19,440 --> 00:49:24,520
Speaker 1: sure and more. We'll never know what calain is tastes like.

796
00:49:24,800 --> 00:49:26,880
Speaker 1: And you got to try some of this coloan. Is

797
00:49:26,960 --> 00:49:31,080
Speaker 1: it tastes delicious with lemon? Yeah? I mean you gotta

798
00:49:31,120 --> 00:49:36,120
Speaker 1: bread it just right, and then you just you know,

799
00:49:36,200 --> 00:49:40,200
Speaker 1: I'm thinking about it. I think it's cowan. I don't

800
00:49:40,200 --> 00:49:44,440
Speaker 1: think I've ever had called Marie got down. I'm sorry,

801
00:49:44,560 --> 00:49:46,600
Speaker 1: I didn't mean to do this. We'll take a break,

802
00:49:47,000 --> 00:50:00,120
Speaker 1: we'll process. We'll be back with more, my mama told me.

803
00:50:01,120 --> 00:50:09,439
Speaker 1: And we are back. Hello, how are you? I'm under

804
00:50:09,480 --> 00:50:15,040
Speaker 1: the water. Please help me. Yeah, we're back here more,

805
00:50:15,160 --> 00:50:17,600
Speaker 1: my mama told me more Marief Foust. And we're still

806
00:50:17,640 --> 00:50:21,560
Speaker 1: talking about the surprises of the food that we eat

807
00:50:21,920 --> 00:50:24,000
Speaker 1: and the possibility that none of it is real and

808
00:50:24,040 --> 00:50:27,440
Speaker 1: we should just make peace with that. Mm hmm. I mean,

809
00:50:27,480 --> 00:50:29,760
Speaker 1: I can't believe we've gotten this far into the episode

810
00:50:29,760 --> 00:50:33,840
Speaker 1: and haven't even mentioned Taco bells me about Taco Bell

811
00:50:34,040 --> 00:50:37,920
Speaker 1: because my mom my mama told me that Taco Bell

812
00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:43,200
Speaker 1: meat is Chihuahua because the dogs in the commercials. And

813
00:50:43,280 --> 00:50:45,520
Speaker 1: she was like, that's what yo, kila, Taco Bell means.

814
00:50:45,560 --> 00:50:49,759
Speaker 1: It means he's gonna be Taco Bell. And and she's like,

815
00:50:49,800 --> 00:50:51,440
Speaker 1: you see, they don't even use the dog no more

816
00:50:51,440 --> 00:50:55,680
Speaker 1: because he did. So it's like, girl, I mean, Taco

817
00:50:55,760 --> 00:50:59,160
Speaker 1: Bell very well could be that. But it's like the

818
00:50:59,200 --> 00:51:01,920
Speaker 1: tacos are like twenty two cents and you can get

819
00:51:01,920 --> 00:51:04,280
Speaker 1: a bag of them and you put the hot sauce

820
00:51:04,320 --> 00:51:08,120
Speaker 1: on them, and it's like, this is not good, and

821
00:51:08,160 --> 00:51:10,600
Speaker 1: what's the White Castle? How do we get all the

822
00:51:10,640 --> 00:51:14,160
Speaker 1: way to this point? I talk about White Castle? Me listen.

823
00:51:14,600 --> 00:51:16,319
Speaker 1: Part of the reason I probably didn't bring them up

824
00:51:16,440 --> 00:51:19,560
Speaker 1: is because they're all cherished restaurants in my heart, and

825
00:51:19,600 --> 00:51:21,479
Speaker 1: so I was like, I don't I'm not even gonna

826
00:51:21,520 --> 00:51:24,120
Speaker 1: mention this ship unless she does, because I ain't gonna listen.

827
00:51:24,120 --> 00:51:26,040
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna yuck my own yum. You know what

828
00:51:26,080 --> 00:51:29,120
Speaker 1: I mean? I heard you had um white Castle sliders

829
00:51:29,120 --> 00:51:32,840
Speaker 1: that your wedding. That's what That's what the say. I

830
00:51:32,960 --> 00:51:35,960
Speaker 1: wish if there was a white Castle available. Oh, I

831
00:51:36,000 --> 00:51:38,279
Speaker 1: would have served white Castle and we would all ship

832
00:51:38,400 --> 00:51:41,759
Speaker 1: ourselves right on the days floor, just white Castle and

833
00:51:41,920 --> 00:51:44,879
Speaker 1: Molly cooking up in our stomachs and making a ship

834
00:51:45,120 --> 00:51:51,799
Speaker 1: in the middle of the dance floor. That's a nasty

835
00:51:52,040 --> 00:51:53,960
Speaker 1: all right. Let's play a game. I want to play

836
00:51:54,000 --> 00:52:03,400
Speaker 1: a game, and this is a fun game called wick Therapy.

837
00:52:04,360 --> 00:52:08,040
Speaker 1: Wig Therapy. That's the game. You, Marie, are known for

838
00:52:08,120 --> 00:52:11,920
Speaker 1: your your hilarious characters on on the internet, on i G.

839
00:52:12,200 --> 00:52:15,400
Speaker 1: The YouTube's and whatnot, where you put on your wigs

840
00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:18,320
Speaker 1: and you tell these beautiful narratives of the the wigs

841
00:52:18,360 --> 00:52:21,800
Speaker 1: and the history behind them, all the shenaniganst these wigs

842
00:52:21,800 --> 00:52:24,160
Speaker 1: get up to. What I would love for you to do,

843
00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:27,960
Speaker 1: is uh. I'm gonna introduce to you a few celebrities

844
00:52:28,000 --> 00:52:30,880
Speaker 1: who might need a little therapy, a little wig therapy,

845
00:52:31,280 --> 00:52:33,799
Speaker 1: and I would love for you to unpack what you

846
00:52:34,080 --> 00:52:37,160
Speaker 1: kind of wig you think these celebrities need to sort

847
00:52:37,160 --> 00:52:40,200
Speaker 1: of revitalize their career or find themselves in a better

848
00:52:40,239 --> 00:52:44,680
Speaker 1: situation at home. Okay, okay, here we go. Let's start easy.

849
00:52:44,840 --> 00:52:47,879
Speaker 1: Bruce Willis got in trouble because he was showing up

850
00:52:47,920 --> 00:52:51,239
Speaker 1: to the pharmacy without wearing a mask, and they were

851
00:52:51,560 --> 00:52:54,080
Speaker 1: They basically had to ask Bruce Willis to leave the

852
00:52:54,120 --> 00:52:57,520
Speaker 1: pharmacy because he would not put on a mask in

853
00:52:57,560 --> 00:53:01,320
Speaker 1: the middle of the pandemic. What wig might you suggest

854
00:53:01,520 --> 00:53:05,839
Speaker 1: for Bruce Willis to to improve his situation? Damn die

855
00:53:05,880 --> 00:53:10,160
Speaker 1: Hard wasn't wearing a mask. Yeah, he's super Republican. Oh

856
00:53:10,200 --> 00:53:12,960
Speaker 1: I did not know that, But so as I'm saying it,

857
00:53:13,560 --> 00:53:15,719
Speaker 1: I feel like I did. I'm like I did not.

858
00:53:16,160 --> 00:53:19,399
Speaker 1: I knew that in your heart, you in my heart,

859
00:53:19,440 --> 00:53:22,360
Speaker 1: I knew that what kind of wig? Does Bruce Willis

860
00:53:22,440 --> 00:53:25,960
Speaker 1: need to revamp his image or fits what he did.

861
00:53:26,280 --> 00:53:29,480
Speaker 1: Either one whatever feels good to you. In my mind,

862
00:53:29,480 --> 00:53:32,839
Speaker 1: it is a Cruella de Ville moment. It's like a

863
00:53:33,000 --> 00:53:36,960
Speaker 1: white wig. It's kind of flipped out a little bit

864
00:53:36,960 --> 00:53:39,080
Speaker 1: on the ends because that feels evil to me. A

865
00:53:39,120 --> 00:53:42,719
Speaker 1: wig like you know what I mean, a little feathering, feathering.

866
00:53:43,800 --> 00:53:48,120
Speaker 1: The opposite of the Rachel wig for Bruce willis definitely

867
00:53:49,040 --> 00:53:52,960
Speaker 1: a wig that has Dalmatians and a wig that doesn't

868
00:53:53,040 --> 00:53:56,440
Speaker 1: stop for pedestrians. It like leans on the horn when

869
00:53:56,480 --> 00:54:02,680
Speaker 1: the pedestrians um. A wig that um pushes by old

870
00:54:02,800 --> 00:54:06,000
Speaker 1: people in the supermarket because they want to get the

871
00:54:06,080 --> 00:54:10,640
Speaker 1: last I don't know, it's a mean it's a mean

872
00:54:10,680 --> 00:54:14,960
Speaker 1: white wig. I love that. I love Cruella Deville. But

873
00:54:15,080 --> 00:54:18,080
Speaker 1: for fish sticks is the energy that Bruce Willis is

874
00:54:18,080 --> 00:54:21,359
Speaker 1: getting off, and I think that's perfect. Let's try another one.

875
00:54:21,600 --> 00:54:25,000
Speaker 1: And this is actually very uh, very on brand for

876
00:54:25,040 --> 00:54:28,200
Speaker 1: what we've been discussing all day. Azalia Banks. I don't

877
00:54:28,200 --> 00:54:30,439
Speaker 1: know if you heard about Azalia Banks, but she got

878
00:54:30,440 --> 00:54:35,000
Speaker 1: in troubled because she apparently cooked her cat. What cooked

879
00:54:35,440 --> 00:54:39,480
Speaker 1: she dug up the dead bones of her cat. Uh,

880
00:54:39,520 --> 00:54:42,160
Speaker 1: and then cook them in a pot and then now

881
00:54:42,320 --> 00:54:44,960
Speaker 1: has the skull and bones of that cat or on

882
00:54:45,000 --> 00:54:51,880
Speaker 1: a shrine in her home. We gotta pray for Azelia. What. No,

883
00:54:52,600 --> 00:54:54,839
Speaker 1: I'm just a reporter at this point. I don't know.

884
00:54:55,040 --> 00:54:58,239
Speaker 1: I can't make sense of it. But she she's cooking cat.

885
00:54:58,320 --> 00:55:02,200
Speaker 1: Now she's cooking at now? Okay. In my mind, it's

886
00:55:02,200 --> 00:55:07,319
Speaker 1: like a Dennis the Menace wig or a three Stooges wig.

887
00:55:07,560 --> 00:55:10,320
Speaker 1: Just like a wig that looks like the toothish, you

888
00:55:10,400 --> 00:55:14,719
Speaker 1: know what I mean, like bowl cut it. Yes, it's

889
00:55:14,719 --> 00:55:19,160
Speaker 1: got a hard part in it. What is wrong with girl?

890
00:55:20,320 --> 00:55:22,839
Speaker 1: I talked to a few people about it. There are

891
00:55:22,880 --> 00:55:26,399
Speaker 1: some who are speculating this is some sort of like uh,

892
00:55:26,480 --> 00:55:30,920
Speaker 1: Santa Ria type work that she's doing. But then she

893
00:55:31,040 --> 00:55:33,400
Speaker 1: also put it on the internet, which makes it not that.

894
00:55:33,560 --> 00:55:35,799
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think she's unwell and we just

895
00:55:36,040 --> 00:55:41,880
Speaker 1: Santaia is like, isn't that Puerto Rican? Likely? Like she's

896
00:55:41,880 --> 00:55:45,320
Speaker 1: from Harlem. She's not Puerto Rican, she's from Harlem. Um.

897
00:55:45,480 --> 00:55:47,279
Speaker 1: I actually don't know where the family is from. But

898
00:55:47,400 --> 00:55:50,560
Speaker 1: I don't think boiling bones in her mom's good pot

899
00:55:50,680 --> 00:55:56,080
Speaker 1: is something that anybody's black mama would let them do so, Yeah,

900
00:55:56,120 --> 00:55:59,680
Speaker 1: she's And why would you post something like that, like

901
00:56:00,200 --> 00:56:02,640
Speaker 1: where did she dig these bones up from? In a

902
00:56:02,680 --> 00:56:07,719
Speaker 1: time capsule? That's the weird part, is like, bitch, why

903
00:56:07,760 --> 00:56:10,400
Speaker 1: are you still burying your cat in the backyard like

904
00:56:10,520 --> 00:56:13,520
Speaker 1: your eight? Cut it out? Go take your cat to

905
00:56:13,640 --> 00:56:18,040
Speaker 1: the pest people like everybody else and let them deal

906
00:56:18,120 --> 00:56:21,120
Speaker 1: with the way bones are meant to be dealt with. Yeah,

907
00:56:21,280 --> 00:56:23,080
Speaker 1: I'm gonna look at the bones. They're gonna it's gonna

908
00:56:23,080 --> 00:56:25,360
Speaker 1: be raccoon bones. I'm gonna be like, that's actually not

909
00:56:25,920 --> 00:56:29,680
Speaker 1: a cat at all. It's another thing that went in

910
00:56:29,880 --> 00:56:32,399
Speaker 1: the ground after the cat died. And I would love

911
00:56:32,440 --> 00:56:35,120
Speaker 1: that if you just expose her. This is just all

912
00:56:35,160 --> 00:56:39,239
Speaker 1: turned into a Jessie Smellette level like live but it's

913
00:56:39,239 --> 00:56:42,040
Speaker 1: still a lady cooking bones that we ignore that and

914
00:56:42,040 --> 00:56:45,160
Speaker 1: we're just like that ain't cat, that's raccoon. This bitch

915
00:56:45,200 --> 00:56:51,040
Speaker 1: is a liar. Yeah, all right, let's try another person.

916
00:56:51,200 --> 00:56:55,360
Speaker 1: This is uh, this is a maybe the greatest of

917
00:56:55,360 --> 00:56:59,239
Speaker 1: of sort of canceled to celebrities. Kanye Kanye you know

918
00:56:59,360 --> 00:57:01,960
Speaker 1: you uh is said to have taken a lover and

919
00:57:02,080 --> 00:57:05,680
Speaker 1: Jeffrey Starr and Uh, he's no longer with Kim. What

920
00:57:05,760 --> 00:57:08,520
Speaker 1: would you suggest for Oh Kanye right about now is

921
00:57:08,520 --> 00:57:15,319
Speaker 1: a week. I'm gonna suggest a Denarest Targarion week. I

922
00:57:15,360 --> 00:57:18,959
Speaker 1: wanted to be blond, flowy, I want four braids, going bad,

923
00:57:19,800 --> 00:57:27,000
Speaker 1: clasped low. I just I feel like, uh, she she

924
00:57:27,240 --> 00:57:29,920
Speaker 1: was the worst part of the finale of Game of Thrones,

925
00:57:30,040 --> 00:57:33,040
Speaker 1: and that I feel like Kanye is in the worst

926
00:57:33,040 --> 00:57:36,320
Speaker 1: part of the finale of his life right now. It

927
00:57:36,400 --> 00:57:40,800
Speaker 1: all feels bad. It feels so. Has this been confirmed?

928
00:57:40,960 --> 00:57:43,320
Speaker 1: Is it? I don't. I don't think so. I think

929
00:57:43,560 --> 00:57:48,000
Speaker 1: uh TikTok made up some conspiracies. And then Jeffrey Starr

930
00:57:48,040 --> 00:57:53,000
Speaker 1: is a messy enough person that he was like, yeah, yeah,

931
00:57:53,040 --> 00:57:56,360
Speaker 1: I'll play along. I'm saying this ain't nothing but Chris Jenner.

932
00:57:56,440 --> 00:57:59,880
Speaker 1: Chris Jenner is the devil, and the devil is always working,

933
00:58:00,040 --> 00:58:03,960
Speaker 1: and I think she needed to distract from the families,

934
00:58:03,960 --> 00:58:05,920
Speaker 1: so they were like, let's just put it all on Kanye,

935
00:58:06,120 --> 00:58:09,600
Speaker 1: and who do we know Jeffrey Star Yes, yes, yes, him,

936
00:58:09,760 --> 00:58:15,600
Speaker 1: yeah exactly. The rumor made me laugh. I appreciate. And

937
00:58:15,640 --> 00:58:18,000
Speaker 1: that's the thing that I I do think Chris Jenner

938
00:58:18,040 --> 00:58:20,120
Speaker 1: is the devil. I think that she's a spawn of Satan.

939
00:58:20,200 --> 00:58:23,040
Speaker 1: It's unquestionable. But I don't think she gets enough credit

940
00:58:23,080 --> 00:58:26,080
Speaker 1: for how funny she is. Like that bits to be

941
00:58:26,200 --> 00:58:31,080
Speaker 1: right and she writes story. Yeah, she writes a story

942
00:58:31,200 --> 00:58:33,880
Speaker 1: like no one else, And sometimes we need to give

943
00:58:33,880 --> 00:58:36,160
Speaker 1: her a little bit of credit where credit is due.

944
00:58:36,240 --> 00:58:40,920
Speaker 1: Sometimes she writes some funny as shit. H all right,

945
00:58:41,160 --> 00:58:44,120
Speaker 1: last one and this is a fun one. Mr Bean.

946
00:58:44,600 --> 00:58:48,000
Speaker 1: Mr Bean was recently canceled because he went on the

947
00:58:48,040 --> 00:58:52,640
Speaker 1: internet and basically said that cancel culture is problematic and

948
00:58:52,680 --> 00:58:57,120
Speaker 1: it's it's poorly affecting many of his peers and confidence

949
00:58:57,160 --> 00:59:00,240
Speaker 1: in his life. You know how upset you gotta make

950
00:59:00,400 --> 00:59:06,000
Speaker 1: Mr Bean to make him speak, You know how upset

951
00:59:06,240 --> 00:59:09,240
Speaker 1: mean for him to be like, let me, let me

952
00:59:09,280 --> 00:59:15,920
Speaker 1: have to say something. Let me this. Mr Bean was

953
00:59:15,960 --> 00:59:19,280
Speaker 1: on for like nineteen seasons and he said twelve words.

954
00:59:19,400 --> 00:59:22,240
Speaker 1: I truly could not tell you what his voice sounds like.

955
00:59:22,280 --> 00:59:30,240
Speaker 1: Even right now. It sounds like I was hoping he

956
00:59:30,320 --> 00:59:32,080
Speaker 1: was gonna talk, and he was like, hey, y'all, niggas

957
00:59:32,120 --> 00:59:35,080
Speaker 1: exacting enough. No, you have heard Mr Bean's voice. He

958
00:59:35,200 --> 00:59:38,640
Speaker 1: was Zazu in The Lion King. Really does happen to

959
00:59:38,720 --> 00:59:44,200
Speaker 1: the original Lion King movie. She's the bird let Mr Bean,

960
00:59:46,800 --> 00:59:52,280
Speaker 1: Mr Elizabeth Bean. What wig would you suggest for Zazo

961
00:59:52,520 --> 00:59:56,200
Speaker 1: for for Elizabeth Bean? Um, I think for Mr Bean,

962
00:59:56,320 --> 01:00:00,720
Speaker 1: I'm giving him the shmar More wig, the braided back wig,

963
01:00:01,280 --> 01:00:06,600
Speaker 1: the Tyler Perry but doo wig is Mr Bean because

964
01:00:06,640 --> 01:00:10,240
Speaker 1: that is some gangster type stuff to not speak for

965
01:00:10,320 --> 01:00:13,400
Speaker 1: your entire career. And then your friends are having a

966
01:00:13,400 --> 01:00:16,640
Speaker 1: bad day because they're problematic, and you're like, let me

967
01:00:16,720 --> 01:00:21,600
Speaker 1: speak on this. I know a lot of people are

968
01:00:21,600 --> 01:00:23,680
Speaker 1: talking right now, but I think what we really need

969
01:00:23,680 --> 01:00:26,880
Speaker 1: to hear is bean, let me hit you with some bean.

970
01:00:28,160 --> 01:00:30,160
Speaker 1: And he's just like, let me say something real quick

971
01:00:31,520 --> 01:00:33,880
Speaker 1: and has beads. He's the straight back corn rools with

972
01:00:33,960 --> 01:00:37,160
Speaker 1: beads at the bottom of the wig that I see

973
01:00:37,600 --> 01:00:41,400
Speaker 1: for Mr Elizabeth Bean. Yes, that's beautiful and and we

974
01:00:41,440 --> 01:00:43,960
Speaker 1: did it, Marie, you you nailed it. I think that

975
01:00:44,160 --> 01:00:46,440
Speaker 1: this is great advice. I'm gonna send all this along

976
01:00:46,480 --> 01:00:48,640
Speaker 1: to each of them and hope that they hope they

977
01:00:48,680 --> 01:00:51,240
Speaker 1: take your advice. Could you tell the people at home

978
01:00:51,400 --> 01:00:53,440
Speaker 1: where they could find you what cool ship you have

979
01:00:53,560 --> 01:00:56,360
Speaker 1: going on? I mean, you can usually find me right

980
01:00:56,400 --> 01:01:00,000
Speaker 1: here on this couch, but you can't find me on Instagram.

981
01:01:00,320 --> 01:01:03,919
Speaker 1: My instagram is Reezy Are Easy? Why you can find

982
01:01:03,960 --> 01:01:06,720
Speaker 1: me on my podcast The Unofficial Expert, where there you know,

983
01:01:06,840 --> 01:01:09,560
Speaker 1: every single week, it's like, can we take some weeks off?

984
01:01:10,720 --> 01:01:14,640
Speaker 1: They want you to talk every week about what's happening

985
01:01:14,640 --> 01:01:18,040
Speaker 1: in the culture and how you feel. So there and

986
01:01:18,080 --> 01:01:21,040
Speaker 1: then you can find me, you know, at my local trader.

987
01:01:21,160 --> 01:01:24,280
Speaker 1: Joe's just like trying to figure out if I want

988
01:01:24,320 --> 01:01:29,320
Speaker 1: to buy food that's real food or if what is

989
01:01:29,400 --> 01:01:33,240
Speaker 1: this meat look that you're gonna see on Marie's phase

990
01:01:33,320 --> 01:01:36,040
Speaker 1: if you bump into our trader Joe's. Yeah, thank you

991
01:01:36,120 --> 01:01:38,960
Speaker 1: so much for ruining Calamari for me, Like, didn't I

992
01:01:39,000 --> 01:01:42,720
Speaker 1: didn't mean to. Honestly, I when Ryan told it to me,

993
01:01:42,840 --> 01:01:45,480
Speaker 1: I knew that I had to share this, But I

994
01:01:45,560 --> 01:01:48,080
Speaker 1: also knew that I was going to offer people. You

995
01:01:48,120 --> 01:01:52,240
Speaker 1: remember that movie It Follows. That's just basically a horror

996
01:01:52,240 --> 01:01:55,760
Speaker 1: movie about st d S. That's what the Calamari story is.

997
01:01:55,920 --> 01:01:59,520
Speaker 1: It's it's just It Follows, but It Follows is a

998
01:01:59,600 --> 01:02:03,200
Speaker 1: horror movie about std Yeah, it's basically like a horror

999
01:02:03,240 --> 01:02:06,400
Speaker 1: movie where like, you have sex with a person and

1000
01:02:06,400 --> 01:02:09,080
Speaker 1: then a ghost attaches to you, and the ghost is

1001
01:02:09,120 --> 01:02:12,400
Speaker 1: gonna kill you unless you have sex with somebody else

1002
01:02:12,880 --> 01:02:18,440
Speaker 1: to give them the ghost. Yeah, oh god, that sound cute.

1003
01:02:17,680 --> 01:02:27,560
Speaker 1: Oh is that all Hulu? It's a Hulu. This is

1004
01:02:27,600 --> 01:02:30,600
Speaker 1: not a promotion for It Follows, but it's turned into one.

1005
01:02:30,680 --> 01:02:33,400
Speaker 1: And what a great way to end the episode. Just

1006
01:02:33,520 --> 01:02:37,440
Speaker 1: promote it follows right at the end. Gross. Anyway, I

1007
01:02:37,640 --> 01:02:39,560
Speaker 1: can't wait to hear this episode. I feel like the

1008
01:02:39,600 --> 01:02:42,400
Speaker 1: beginning was messy, in the middle was like, okay, we

1009
01:02:42,560 --> 01:02:45,280
Speaker 1: learning things, and in the end was Mr Bean. So

1010
01:02:46,400 --> 01:02:49,600
Speaker 1: I love this for us and I'm so happy you

1011
01:02:49,640 --> 01:02:51,800
Speaker 1: did it. And as always, you guys can follow me

1012
01:02:51,840 --> 01:02:55,240
Speaker 1: at Langston Kerman and please send us drops, Please subscribe

1013
01:02:55,640 --> 01:02:58,560
Speaker 1: and like and comment. I love the comments. Send me

1014
01:02:58,640 --> 01:03:02,080
Speaker 1: comments and finally, uh, you can send me drops and

1015
01:03:02,080 --> 01:03:06,320
Speaker 1: ship at my mama pod at gmail dot com. Okay,

1016
01:03:06,360 --> 01:03:14,880
Speaker 1: that's enough, get the funk out of here, my crop

1017
01:03:15,000 --> 01:03:22,240
Speaker 1: chips in your fails O. Kuala bears are racist, the

1018
01:03:22,440 --> 01:03:29,760
Speaker 1: OsO players money many turnkey stuff. I can't tell me