WEBVTT - College Dropout Checklist 0:00:00.320 --> 0:00:02.600 This episode is brought to you by self Ceremony, a 0:00:02.680 --> 0:00:07.040 self care brand that celebrates putting aside time to honor 0:00:07.080 --> 0:00:12.200 yourself and celebrate the self ceremonies we all need in 0:00:12.240 --> 0:00:12.840 our lives. 0:00:13.200 --> 0:00:16.160 Self Ceremony has some bomb ass herbal smokes. 0:00:16.280 --> 0:00:18.200 They have a lot of which, by. 0:00:18.079 --> 0:00:19.480 The way, if you don't know what erbal smokes are, 0:00:19.600 --> 0:00:23.759 they're smokes without cannabis, which I thought was really strange, 0:00:23.800 --> 0:00:25.880 to be honest, but I've smoked them and I really 0:00:26.000 --> 0:00:27.280 enjoy them and the idea. 0:00:27.280 --> 0:00:29.360 They have one that's like calm. They're all kind of. 0:00:29.560 --> 0:00:30.400 All different uses. 0:00:31.360 --> 0:00:35.599 They also have crystal dildos or crystal pleasure tools ones 0:00:35.720 --> 0:00:38.720 one one pleasure one which I have a rose quartz 0:00:38.760 --> 0:00:42.400 one and I've been using that along with my Yoni egg, 0:00:42.479 --> 0:00:44.720 which has been an interesting exploration. 0:00:45.200 --> 0:00:47.479 And I think what's really cool about the wands is 0:00:47.520 --> 0:00:51.640 each of them has different healing aids, so they do 0:00:51.680 --> 0:00:53.479 different things if you align yourself. 0:00:53.640 --> 0:00:54.400 They also have. 0:00:54.560 --> 0:00:56.440 Oh Guasha tool. Have you ever used those? 0:00:57.040 --> 0:00:57.200 Oh? 0:00:57.240 --> 0:00:58.160 Like the ones? Would? 0:00:58.320 --> 0:01:00.440 No? No, it's not what It's like j aid and 0:01:00.440 --> 0:01:02.520 you use it to like massage your face and it 0:01:02.560 --> 0:01:04.360 brings circulation back into your skin. 0:01:04.840 --> 0:01:08.880 And it encourages like a circulation and. 0:01:08.920 --> 0:01:13.440 Youth and really just like honestly, I use it right here, 0:01:13.520 --> 0:01:17.039 like like on my like that jaw. Bitch, I clench 0:01:17.120 --> 0:01:19.800 my jaw so much, ask anyone. People always like, bitch, 0:01:20.160 --> 0:01:22.560 why are you clenching your jaw? But with the Guasha tool, 0:01:22.560 --> 0:01:24.440 it feels like it helps kind of like break down 0:01:24.520 --> 0:01:25.120 that pressure. 0:01:25.319 --> 0:01:29.160 Yeah, because I also rend my teeth at night. Also, 0:01:29.200 --> 0:01:32.479 what I really enjoy from self Ceremony is that they 0:01:32.480 --> 0:01:33.840 have crystal pipes. 0:01:34.480 --> 0:01:37.920 Yes I know, and they're really beautiful. Yeah, basically their bomb. 0:01:38.600 --> 0:01:43.200 Go check them out self Ceremony dot com and let 0:01:43.200 --> 0:01:44.120 them know good Moms that. 0:01:44.200 --> 0:02:16.280 You I. 0:02:23.960 --> 0:02:26.920 Know you don't lose it, just snop. Come on, baby, 0:02:27.280 --> 0:02:29.679 you guys to get into with you don't hope with 0:02:29.800 --> 0:02:30.800 the player with the cool. 0:02:30.840 --> 0:02:33.200 Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. 0:02:33.280 --> 0:02:34.840 I'm Erica and I'm Nila. 0:02:35.080 --> 0:02:37.280 Happy Wednesday. Hey y'all. 0:02:37.320 --> 0:02:40.079 Hey, Hope you guys are having a wonderful week. Hope 0:02:40.120 --> 0:02:42.480 you guys set your intentions for the week. Hope you 0:02:42.520 --> 0:02:46.600 guys have been working on that manifestation man woman, whatever 0:02:46.639 --> 0:02:50.120 the fuck you want list partner manifestation. I worked on 0:02:50.160 --> 0:02:52.840 mine on Halloween, which I don't know why. I just 0:02:52.880 --> 0:02:54.760 like I came home. I had such like a crazy 0:02:54.800 --> 0:02:57.840 Halloween with Iri, like going to like one hundred and 0:02:58.120 --> 0:03:01.680 four different events, and at one point I was like 0:03:01.919 --> 0:03:03.400 I was like, was like, don't you want to leave? 0:03:03.800 --> 0:03:06.440 Like we can go home, we can like cuddle, we 0:03:06.480 --> 0:03:09.359 can eat your candy. Like I really sold it to 0:03:09.440 --> 0:03:10.760 her and she was like, yeah, I do. 0:03:11.000 --> 0:03:13.880 I was like, fuck my god, loft the thing earlier. 0:03:14.000 --> 0:03:16.400 Yeah, And so we came back and we were chilling. 0:03:16.440 --> 0:03:17.760 I was in my robe and I was like, you 0:03:17.760 --> 0:03:21.000 know what, I need to go ahead and really focus 0:03:21.040 --> 0:03:23.120 on that list and make that goddamn list. 0:03:23.320 --> 0:03:25.880 And once I started a girl, I couldn't stop. 0:03:25.919 --> 0:03:26.440 Did you see that? 0:03:26.480 --> 0:03:28.440 Did you see my list? It was like two pages long? 0:03:28.560 --> 0:03:30.440 Wait is when I was did you post it? 0:03:30.800 --> 0:03:31.040 I did? 0:03:31.320 --> 0:03:31.840 Is that yours? 0:03:32.040 --> 0:03:32.280 Yeah? 0:03:32.400 --> 0:03:33.519 I thought it was somebody else's. 0:03:33.639 --> 0:03:36.960 I I've screenshotted all the ones people have shown us 0:03:37.160 --> 0:03:37.800 for reference. 0:03:38.000 --> 0:03:40.040 I haven't done it, but I think I need to 0:03:40.040 --> 0:03:40.839 do it more than ever. 0:03:45.040 --> 0:03:47.600 By the way, my best friend Sebastian is sitting in 0:03:47.600 --> 0:03:49.000 on this episode. 0:03:50.760 --> 0:03:51.520 Rolling a joints. 0:03:51.560 --> 0:03:54.760 So if you hear a wheezing man, that's him. 0:04:00.360 --> 0:04:02.600 That's what I was like, you know, I didn't really 0:04:02.680 --> 0:04:05.240 know what you meant by the wheezing, but you're right, 0:04:07.320 --> 0:04:08.800 it's just there. 0:04:10.080 --> 0:04:12.960 But uh, I say, oh, that's so that list. So 0:04:13.000 --> 0:04:15.120 I just had time and I was like, you know what, 0:04:15.200 --> 0:04:17.080 I it's so important to write it down because I 0:04:17.080 --> 0:04:19.479 really had to think about every I was like, don't 0:04:19.560 --> 0:04:23.760 miss a thing. That's my specific, like my mom said 0:04:24.040 --> 0:04:27.880 the specific. Yeah, so I was being Hella specific. And 0:04:27.920 --> 0:04:29.480 I got a few more to add to the list 0:04:29.560 --> 0:04:34.800 after this week, this yesterday, I got a few to 0:04:34.839 --> 0:04:36.400 add to that list. 0:04:36.400 --> 0:04:38.560 Need to be even more specific, and you know you 0:04:38.720 --> 0:04:39.880 I don't. I feel like it's a list you can 0:04:39.960 --> 0:04:40.440 keep adding to. 0:04:40.520 --> 0:04:43.320 You can take things away too, because I think there's 0:04:43.360 --> 0:04:45.279 times when you encounter the things you think you want 0:04:45.320 --> 0:04:46.880 and then you see them and you're like, you know, 0:04:47.080 --> 0:04:48.200 actually I don't really need that. 0:04:48.320 --> 0:04:52.000 I know somebody Uh I reposted somebody's list and somebody 0:04:52.040 --> 0:04:52.800 else was. 0:04:52.800 --> 0:04:55.240 Like, she wants a robot. So I went to re 0:04:55.240 --> 0:04:56.119 reference the list. 0:04:56.560 --> 0:04:58.920 I was like, this bitch doesn't know her self worth No, bitch, 0:04:59.000 --> 0:05:00.000 she knows what she wants. 0:05:00.040 --> 0:05:01.320 Yeah, she knows exactly what you want. 0:05:01.400 --> 0:05:03.720 Now, this is not a robot. This seems about fair. 0:05:04.839 --> 0:05:08.200 You could add twenty more things. Yeah, fuck that shit. 0:05:08.520 --> 0:05:11.320 It's going to be specific, and I think it's not 0:05:11.440 --> 0:05:16.200 so much like looks and perfection as it is just specifics. 0:05:16.440 --> 0:05:20.719 That shit is important, And I'm actually like thinking about 0:05:20.720 --> 0:05:22.920 the list that I'm creating in my mind, I'm actually 0:05:22.960 --> 0:05:25.919 grateful for the fuck that relationships that I've had and 0:05:25.920 --> 0:05:28.120 the people I've had, because that's how I'm going to 0:05:28.200 --> 0:05:29.960 know what to put on this list specifically. 0:05:33.920 --> 0:05:38.480 Speaking of which, oh wait, we have we we haven't 0:05:38.480 --> 0:05:41.800 talked in a while, actually since before my birthday trip. 0:05:42.360 --> 0:05:43.920 Oh we haven't, we haven't. 0:05:44.160 --> 0:05:48.680 Yeah, my birthday trip was wonderful. Thanks for asking. 0:05:49.640 --> 0:05:51.360 Why don't you recap that a bit? 0:05:51.520 --> 0:05:53.559 Oh? You know, I just made a lot of really 0:05:54.240 --> 0:05:57.640 great decisions for myself. It was all about everything I 0:05:57.680 --> 0:05:59.640 wanted to do, and I did that. I may have 0:05:59.640 --> 0:06:04.080 fell in love and Tuloom, I'm I haven't talked to 0:06:04.640 --> 0:06:05.520 him every day. 0:06:07.279 --> 0:06:10.800 Every day? Right now? What are you gonna call him? 0:06:11.279 --> 0:06:11.880 T Loombay? 0:06:11.960 --> 0:06:17.560 Taloombay. Yeah, as Africa is Africa, I. 0:06:19.520 --> 0:06:22.400 Found another African. He's from a different region. No more Nigerians. 0:06:26.040 --> 0:06:26.800 I'm just kidding. 0:06:27.320 --> 0:06:29.200 No, I just I had a great time, Like I 0:06:29.200 --> 0:06:31.640 had such a good time with my friends. You know, 0:06:31.839 --> 0:06:35.000 I had a lot of self realizations out there, like 0:06:35.080 --> 0:06:36.560 moments of like, you know what I'm not I don't. 0:06:37.080 --> 0:06:39.440 I realized, like I said, I think before this episode, 0:06:39.480 --> 0:06:42.480 like before we were when we recorded our last episode, 0:06:42.480 --> 0:06:44.960 that my year of thirty two for me really felt 0:06:45.000 --> 0:06:47.719 like years of like trusting my instincts and my gut 0:06:47.839 --> 0:06:51.520 and like not questioning myself when I know I feel something. 0:06:52.240 --> 0:06:57.120 So I was on the beaches of Tulum and I 0:06:57.640 --> 0:07:00.760 suddenly like remembered that I have this audition that I 0:07:00.760 --> 0:07:02.359 was supposed to send a self tape for and it 0:07:02.400 --> 0:07:05.080 was like a really big audition. And I've been like 0:07:05.120 --> 0:07:07.680 battling with this back and forth for a while because 0:07:07.720 --> 0:07:09.760 I've been acting pretty much my whole life on and off. 0:07:10.440 --> 0:07:13.320 And I was like, you know what, I don't want 0:07:13.360 --> 0:07:15.840 to do this anymore, Like this doesn't make me happy, 0:07:16.080 --> 0:07:17.360 Like I hate auditioning. 0:07:17.920 --> 0:07:21.040 I'm done with auditioning. And my friend was like, what 0:07:21.160 --> 0:07:22.760 You're done, and I'm like yeah. 0:07:22.800 --> 0:07:26.040 And I came back to LA and I fired everyone 0:07:26.960 --> 0:07:28.800 and I had not fired, but I told them, like, 0:07:28.880 --> 0:07:30.880 you know what, I'm done like I just need a break, 0:07:31.560 --> 0:07:32.960 but it might be not be a break, it might 0:07:33.000 --> 0:07:36.280 be an extended break. So I feel like I've already 0:07:36.280 --> 0:07:39.920 started to start to cut the things off of trim 0:07:39.920 --> 0:07:40.680 the fat. 0:07:41.840 --> 0:07:45.960 For thirty two. And then I also we ended. Me 0:07:46.000 --> 0:07:46.760 and my girl ended up. 0:07:47.240 --> 0:07:49.920 We were on this boat all night, all day and 0:07:49.920 --> 0:07:52.080 may or may not have you know, been partaking and 0:07:52.320 --> 0:07:52.960 party things. 0:07:55.200 --> 0:07:55.840 And then. 0:07:57.840 --> 0:07:59.600 We got back to that crib and everyone was so 0:07:59.640 --> 0:08:01.960 fucking tired. But I was like, no, we're not, but 0:08:02.040 --> 0:08:04.520 this is not ending. So I got my friend dressed, 0:08:04.560 --> 0:08:07.640 literally physically put her clothes on, did her makeup. We 0:08:07.680 --> 0:08:10.560 went to this party and we did her makeup. Yeah, 0:08:10.600 --> 0:08:13.400 Like it was like I literally got her dress. Like 0:08:13.400 --> 0:08:17.520 I'm not kidding, but I'm so glad we went because yeah, 0:08:17.560 --> 0:08:19.840 I ended up meeting this guy and like we had 0:08:19.840 --> 0:08:23.560 a really great I had like a tuloom like love affair. 0:08:23.640 --> 0:08:26.239 It was fucking awesome. It was like Sundance all over again. 0:08:29.720 --> 0:08:32.679 So yeah, we're gonna meet up in New York and oh, 0:08:32.720 --> 0:08:35.120 you are this true? And he's younger than me. 0:08:35.280 --> 0:08:37.760 You know I don't do younger. Oh I know, you 0:08:37.800 --> 0:08:39.840 know I'm I discriminate young. 0:08:39.760 --> 0:08:49.800 Beye to Limbae, that's very African, young Bay. We're just 0:08:49.840 --> 0:08:50.560 making up. 0:08:51.080 --> 0:08:52.240 God he ever hears this. 0:08:56.600 --> 0:09:01.360 Honestly, bitch, you are like vacation school or okay, you're 0:09:01.440 --> 0:09:06.120 like international dating app out of town luck. Okay, you 0:09:06.160 --> 0:09:09.080 talk about you're not lucky, You're lucky as fuck. Every 0:09:09.080 --> 0:09:10.800 time it's bitch goes somewhere, she comes back in love 0:09:11.000 --> 0:09:13.440 or she at least has a good date somebody. 0:09:13.480 --> 0:09:17.160 There was a post, I responded. I responded. 0:09:19.000 --> 0:09:20.920 I was like, first, make sure you go to a 0:09:20.960 --> 0:09:24.000 location where there's probability of meeting a sexy man is 0:09:24.080 --> 0:09:29.360 high aka the Islands. To Loom, I said, to Loom 0:09:29.720 --> 0:09:32.640 or Spain, But you meant did me meet somebody in 0:09:32.679 --> 0:09:34.320 like Europe? And then I said, and then I said, 0:09:34.600 --> 0:09:39.439 musical events or film events like festivals. 0:09:39.080 --> 0:09:41.520 Here are the because there's always a mix of people, 0:09:41.800 --> 0:09:42.040 you know. 0:09:42.880 --> 0:09:46.560 And then I was like step two, drink tequila. Step three, 0:09:46.800 --> 0:09:51.440 have no inhibitions the end. So because on this trip 0:09:51.480 --> 0:09:57.559 I had zero inhibitions, I definitely indulged for sure in everyone. 0:10:00.000 --> 0:10:02.240 I was before we fell in love, that was before 0:10:02.240 --> 0:10:03.000 I met my husband. 0:10:03.320 --> 0:10:11.160 How long were there fell in love and married? 0:10:11.559 --> 0:10:13.400 I got straight to work and then I found my 0:10:13.480 --> 0:10:16.400 husband because I manifested him because. 0:10:16.120 --> 0:10:17.959 She had no inhibitions. See, ladies, what happens? We have 0:10:18.040 --> 0:10:18.720 no in ambitions. 0:10:18.760 --> 0:10:20.160 I mean he does check off on a few of 0:10:20.160 --> 0:10:22.480 the things that I had on the list, so, but 0:10:22.640 --> 0:10:23.960 it's to be seeing the rest. 0:10:24.360 --> 0:10:26.679 He's going to come to New York. Yeah, because he's 0:10:26.679 --> 0:10:31.439 in DC. Okay, you know when I go to New York. 0:10:31.440 --> 0:10:32.199 You know what I'm doing? 0:10:32.360 --> 0:10:32.880 What are you doing? 0:10:32.920 --> 0:10:34.360 I'm resettying my Hinge location. 0:10:34.840 --> 0:10:35.840 You do need to do that. 0:10:36.920 --> 0:10:37.720 Mama's in town. 0:10:37.840 --> 0:10:40.920 Turn that just so whack. 0:10:41.000 --> 0:10:43.360 I just got a message from someone from Hinge like that. 0:10:43.400 --> 0:10:46.280 We connected like three weeks ago. He's like, hey, sorry, 0:10:46.400 --> 0:10:50.880 just checking. I'm like, figure goodbye. Why I'm bad too though, 0:10:50.880 --> 0:10:52.320 I mean I go check it for like a week. 0:10:52.800 --> 0:10:53.560 Why I swipe? 0:10:54.040 --> 0:10:55.640 Okay? But I have complaints about Hinge. 0:10:55.760 --> 0:11:00.319 First and foremost, fuck Hinge because the person said the 0:11:00.400 --> 0:11:02.839 email alert me to say I'm most compatible. 0:11:02.320 --> 0:11:03.520 With It's never accurate. 0:11:03.600 --> 0:11:06.880 It's always the person I'm the least compatible. Who the 0:11:06.880 --> 0:11:08.280 fuck is magic? I don't want this. 0:11:09.960 --> 0:11:10.760 We look like cute. 0:11:10.800 --> 0:11:11.719 My baby looks on that thing. 0:11:11.800 --> 0:11:12.040 I know. 0:11:12.240 --> 0:11:15.560 And also, you know, after you swipe, like you like 0:11:15.640 --> 0:11:16.320 people too. 0:11:16.200 --> 0:11:20.880 Much, it will pause you for the day to Okay, 0:11:20.920 --> 0:11:21.760 that's never happened to me. 0:11:21.800 --> 0:11:23.040 How many swipes are you doing? 0:11:23.400 --> 0:11:25.120 Well? No, you did tell me that one time. 0:11:25.240 --> 0:11:26.360 No, that's on rayah. 0:11:26.520 --> 0:11:29.560 Oh well, I thought, well it did occur to me. 0:11:29.640 --> 0:11:32.319 I am obviously like you. I'm always giving somebody. 0:11:32.080 --> 0:11:35.520 A chance, like I say, I'm so U No. Yeah. 0:11:35.559 --> 0:11:37.880 I started to change my approach, like can I see 0:11:37.920 --> 0:11:42.360 myself looking at this face every day? 0:11:42.600 --> 0:11:45.920 When I did go check back into my compatibility section 0:11:46.080 --> 0:11:48.280 or what the fuck the person I had swiped on? 0:11:48.640 --> 0:11:51.400 I was like, wait, I swiped on this. I'm like, hey, 0:11:51.480 --> 0:11:53.600 are you trolling me? There's no way I swiped on 0:11:53.640 --> 0:11:57.240 this nigga. No, no, they might be trolling you. 0:11:59.160 --> 0:12:02.640 Who was he was? Oh my god? 0:12:02.640 --> 0:12:03.160 Where did he go? 0:12:03.240 --> 0:12:04.040 Remember? Yeah? 0:12:04.440 --> 0:12:05.719 You know I remember. 0:12:08.520 --> 0:12:11.360 I found we were talking about I'm talking. Wait, yes, 0:12:12.080 --> 0:12:13.320 I don't to go back there. 0:12:13.040 --> 0:12:15.679 Why Why did I match with him? Is what I 0:12:15.800 --> 0:12:16.200 want to know. 0:12:16.520 --> 0:12:18.120 I don't think he's on my list anymore. Maybe he 0:12:18.160 --> 0:12:20.240 deleted me? Can you delete people? 0:12:20.240 --> 0:12:21.120 You can only hide them? 0:12:21.559 --> 0:12:23.120 Well, one time this guy is like you know my 0:12:23.160 --> 0:12:25.880 ex and blocking I was like, I don't even have 0:12:25.920 --> 0:12:26.480 no idea where you do. 0:12:26.640 --> 0:12:29.080 I think it's when you hide them, because you can 0:12:29.160 --> 0:12:31.000 hide people, and I think when you do that, you're 0:12:31.040 --> 0:12:32.239 deybe he found. 0:12:32.000 --> 0:12:32.839 The love of his life. 0:12:33.160 --> 0:12:33.839 I don't know whatever. 0:12:33.880 --> 0:12:35.800 Oh my god, I went on I didn't tell you. 0:12:35.840 --> 0:12:42.080 I went on a date, and frankly, I was hungry. 0:12:40.200 --> 0:12:46.280 I literally needed to write a booklet When Jammia's Hungry, 0:12:46.720 --> 0:12:47.640 A Story of. 0:12:47.720 --> 0:12:56.200 First Date, It's so good. Starts today When Jimmia's Hungry, 0:12:56.200 --> 0:12:58.000 A Story of First Date. It's like it's like a 0:12:58.080 --> 0:13:04.280 children first and last Dates. I fucking love it. Nobody 0:13:04.320 --> 0:13:05.319 tries some ideas. 0:13:07.040 --> 0:13:09.720 So I went to this date and this guy's like, 0:13:10.320 --> 0:13:12.600 oh well, because I was like hungry right then, because 0:13:12.679 --> 0:13:14.360 I know it's like such big image. 0:13:14.800 --> 0:13:16.280 I was like he's like. I was like, want to 0:13:16.320 --> 0:13:18.400 go now? He's like, okay, well how about eight? 0:13:18.440 --> 0:13:20.200 It was like six. I was like, well, I'm starving. 0:13:21.400 --> 0:13:23.360 He's like, what was my daughter? I'm like fine, I'll wait. 0:13:25.440 --> 0:13:30.679 So we're talking. Keep in mind, he's like fifty. He's 0:13:30.720 --> 0:13:32.480 like older white guy. He's cool though, but he's like 0:13:32.520 --> 0:13:35.040 also like seven feet tall. I was not suspecting that 0:13:36.480 --> 0:13:39.040 I meet him at the She's fare that he suggested, 0:13:39.160 --> 0:13:41.000 and there's like this little white lady sitting next to us, 0:13:41.000 --> 0:13:43.280 and I can see her like, look over, like, wasn't 0:13:43.280 --> 0:13:44.520 expecting this bitch to walk. 0:13:45.720 --> 0:13:49.280 Like a five foot two black woman seven foot tall 0:13:49.360 --> 0:13:53.160 white man, and like I probably appear to be, like 0:13:53.160 --> 0:13:54.880 do you probably had on your high heel. 0:13:56.600 --> 0:13:56.880 Heart. 0:13:57.480 --> 0:13:59.280 No, I was wearing jeans and boots. 0:14:00.880 --> 0:14:05.080 So anyway, he keeps talking and somehow we mentioned someone 0:14:05.080 --> 0:14:07.319 and he's like, oh, because a friend of the family 0:14:07.480 --> 0:14:09.439 dated so and so. 0:14:10.559 --> 0:14:12.480 And immediately I know who he's talking about. 0:14:13.120 --> 0:14:19.640 So I'm like who, And he says a person that 0:14:19.760 --> 0:14:22.000 I know and that is friends with my baby daddy. 0:14:22.600 --> 0:14:24.960 And I'm just like I know him or whatever. 0:14:25.040 --> 0:14:27.880 But I'm like, if only this gets back to him, 0:14:29.080 --> 0:14:30.120 like what the fuck are you? 0:14:30.320 --> 0:14:32.800 Well you didn't know, I mean I didn't know. I 0:14:32.840 --> 0:14:33.560 mean I was not a big deal. 0:14:33.560 --> 0:14:37.840 Okay, So anybody jump ahead, like two days dinner was great, fantastic, 0:14:37.880 --> 0:14:42.000 he was an excellent sushi order. But you know whatever, 0:14:43.360 --> 0:14:47.200 So he tries to hang out again. I'm tired. I'm like, 0:14:47.200 --> 0:14:49.240 I don't think it's gonna happen. He's like, he says, 0:14:49.280 --> 0:14:50.880 I was like, and I have my kid or something. 0:14:51.160 --> 0:14:52.600 He was like, well, you can put it to sleep 0:14:52.640 --> 0:14:57.360 and I can come over. I just stopped responding. I mean, 0:14:57.400 --> 0:15:00.320 I wasn't that compelled either way. But he was like, 0:15:00.360 --> 0:15:02.040 did I say was I too forward? 0:15:02.080 --> 0:15:02.480 I'm sorry? 0:15:02.560 --> 0:15:05.520 Hello, Yeah, don't tell me what I need to do. 0:15:06.240 --> 0:15:07.920 Thank you. If I want to do that, I'll do that. 0:15:07.960 --> 0:15:09.120 But I I don't know you. 0:15:09.160 --> 0:15:10.920 You think I'm gonna invite you to my house with 0:15:10.960 --> 0:15:15.880 my kids. No, the fact that she was suggested absurd. 0:15:18.120 --> 0:15:20.520 No, that is absurd. That is absurd. 0:15:20.880 --> 0:15:27.640 Jimmila's first in last date ridiculous. 0:15:29.960 --> 0:15:31.920 Oh my god, I have so many now that you're 0:15:31.960 --> 0:15:38.800 just saying, so Psycho, I am. 0:15:37.080 --> 0:15:43.000 A book of first and last anyway. Yeah, so that's 0:15:43.960 --> 0:15:44.840 that's updated on. 0:15:44.880 --> 0:15:49.080 Me for everybody. Know, there's a lot of gaps left 0:15:49.080 --> 0:15:53.200 out of this. Shut up. I'm gonna be the first sacond. 0:15:54.200 --> 0:15:56.480 That vacation was like some Swiss cheese. 0:15:59.680 --> 0:16:02.360 I'm not ready to share. I know when I'm ready 0:16:02.400 --> 0:16:08.040 to share it, I will share. Four years had a 0:16:08.080 --> 0:16:10.240 great time. That was awesome. 0:16:11.160 --> 0:16:15.560 Uh yeah, any other updates, any of the current events. 0:16:17.160 --> 0:16:23.680 No, I was gonna say something absurd, you would kill me. 0:16:23.920 --> 0:16:24.360 Yeah, I'm not. 0:16:24.480 --> 0:16:36.800 I almost have like a thousand things, and then I said. 0:16:32.080 --> 0:16:33.720 You know, I was gonna say, we should plan a 0:16:33.800 --> 0:16:34.560 New York meetup. 0:16:34.800 --> 0:16:39.280 You know what, we should plan a fun up meetup. 0:16:39.520 --> 0:16:41.520 You know, like what does that ship where we like 0:16:41.560 --> 0:16:43.800 break ship a break room. We are going to do that, 0:16:43.880 --> 0:16:47.440 I know, like asap, like I needed. I saw a 0:16:47.480 --> 0:16:50.080 coupon on the internet. See it's a sign. 0:16:50.200 --> 0:16:51.960 Yeah, no, I thought it was for. 0:16:51.880 --> 0:16:54.480 Sure, but also the internet's listening. 0:16:55.320 --> 0:16:56.600 I think that specifically. 0:16:56.960 --> 0:16:59.280 Yeah, actually I know this is not to be true 0:16:59.280 --> 0:17:00.640 because I saw on somebody else's phone. 0:17:00.800 --> 0:17:02.400 You saw it on someone else's phone. 0:17:02.480 --> 0:17:05.120 No, that's whoever's phone is around, and you like, you're 0:17:05.119 --> 0:17:06.800 talking about things I talked about shoes. 0:17:07.040 --> 0:17:09.080 I bet you in ten minutes, I get I g Yeah, 0:17:09.520 --> 0:17:11.119 the specific designer you spoke of. 0:17:11.320 --> 0:17:15.160 Is anybody fighting against this? Our rights are being infringed 0:17:15.160 --> 0:17:16.240 in You. 0:17:16.200 --> 0:17:18.200 Can go to the setting and I don't believe that. No, 0:17:20.000 --> 0:17:21.480 I believe it's there. I don't believe it works. 0:17:21.600 --> 0:17:23.240 You do you do you ever? Do you ever see 0:17:23.280 --> 0:17:24.159 on your cell phone? 0:17:24.600 --> 0:17:27.560 If you like, jump out of an app or something, 0:17:27.720 --> 0:17:30.560 it kind of like the recording microphone in the top 0:17:30.680 --> 0:17:31.960 left corner, like linger. 0:17:31.800 --> 0:17:34.520 Because that little weird you see you see sometimes it 0:17:34.520 --> 0:17:35.439 will pop up at weird time. 0:17:35.520 --> 0:17:36.439 You see that it's recording. 0:17:36.520 --> 0:17:38.480 Yes, yes, I've seen it pop up and. 0:17:38.840 --> 0:17:40.919 Is this a good show? You the recording ultimate? 0:17:42.440 --> 0:17:44.879 But you have seen it too, right, you know I 0:17:44.880 --> 0:17:50.439 don't like that. Ship Halloween was fun. Halloween. 0:17:51.880 --> 0:17:55.879 Oh I did a family costume with baby Daddy. 0:17:57.040 --> 0:17:57.960 We did Adam. 0:17:58.359 --> 0:18:00.119 It was so good. She was so invested it. 0:18:00.280 --> 0:18:02.040 She's like, call me Wednesday all day. 0:18:02.680 --> 0:18:03.200 I love her. 0:18:03.280 --> 0:18:04.960 And then I was like, guess well, it's time to 0:18:04.960 --> 0:18:07.000 get dressed from home and she's like I'm so excited. 0:18:07.240 --> 0:18:08.520 Oh my god, you know what we got that? 0:18:08.640 --> 0:18:10.639 She was so scared we were trigger treating. She was. 0:18:10.800 --> 0:18:13.399 I was like super Girl over here, like I was 0:18:13.680 --> 0:18:16.080 usually the scaredy cat, and she's like, Luna, don't worry, 0:18:16.119 --> 0:18:19.520 it's okay, I've got you. I'm wonder woman. 0:18:19.840 --> 0:18:20.960 It was hilarious. 0:18:21.160 --> 0:18:24.320 Me Mom, I'm like, what kind of non scary Adam's 0:18:24.320 --> 0:18:25.080 family are you. 0:18:27.160 --> 0:18:30.640 I got a couple of texts. I got a text. 0:18:32.040 --> 0:18:35.720 From somebody like you have a boyfriend. I was like, 0:18:35.840 --> 0:18:38.000 oh no, I have a baby daddy that participates in 0:18:38.080 --> 0:18:40.600 Halloween and family Halloween. 0:18:41.680 --> 0:18:45.000 With questions and ship oh god, I know. 0:18:45.680 --> 0:18:51.879 It would be like you dedicated a text to buy audios. 0:18:52.000 --> 0:18:52.960 Do you have a boyfriend? 0:18:53.040 --> 0:19:05.640 Yeah, we're doing a family fucking costume, right. 0:19:03.680 --> 0:19:03.840 So. 0:19:07.400 --> 0:19:08.840 Wait, what were we gonna talk about today? 0:19:09.080 --> 0:19:09.840 College? 0:19:09.880 --> 0:19:10.520 College? 0:19:11.280 --> 0:19:12.240 College? College? 0:19:13.080 --> 0:19:15.880 So we asked for suggestions. We guys are really good ones. 0:19:15.920 --> 0:19:17.560 It's gonna take us at least six months to get 0:19:17.600 --> 0:19:20.000 through them all. Hellelujah. 0:19:21.400 --> 0:19:21.800 College. 0:19:21.920 --> 0:19:24.720 So someone asked that she's in college and she feels 0:19:24.800 --> 0:19:27.159 like she feels like she's going for her family, and 0:19:27.240 --> 0:19:29.240 she doesn't know if she really wants to go, and 0:19:29.240 --> 0:19:33.120 then she just then she uh proceeded to remind us, 0:19:33.800 --> 0:19:36.919 you guys didn't finish college, right, like, damn, you know 0:19:36.960 --> 0:19:38.120 our business I forgot. 0:19:39.440 --> 0:19:43.840 So so we were. 0:19:43.800 --> 0:19:47.320 Just, uh, I was revisiting my decision to go to college. 0:19:47.400 --> 0:19:49.600 But Eric is like, I was like, you know, the 0:19:49.600 --> 0:19:51.399 fact that we didn't we dropped out. She's like it 0:19:51.400 --> 0:19:53.560 wasn't even a thought. I just it's just something I did. 0:19:53.680 --> 0:19:57.200 Yeah, it was like it was a gradual dropout. 0:19:57.320 --> 0:19:57.480 Yeah. 0:19:57.520 --> 0:19:59.600 Mine, that was like a gradual drop until point I 0:19:59.680 --> 0:20:02.320 was like, bitch, you're not going yeah, like yeah, that's. 0:20:02.200 --> 0:20:04.919 We're just not gonna waste that money this time because 0:20:04.960 --> 0:20:05.919 I was barely going. 0:20:06.840 --> 0:20:11.800 I was not committing. Yeah, I mean for me, I 0:20:11.840 --> 0:20:15.360 feel like it's so hard, Like. 0:20:17.359 --> 0:20:20.399 I don't know, I feel like college at seventeen, when 0:20:20.440 --> 0:20:23.840 I was in college, I barely even knew anything about 0:20:23.880 --> 0:20:27.480 myself anything, like to put. I think we put people 0:20:27.520 --> 0:20:29.359 in college and we want them to figure out what 0:20:29.359 --> 0:20:30.720 they want to do for the rest of their life, 0:20:30.760 --> 0:20:33.200 and like it's so much pressure. But now that I'm 0:20:33.200 --> 0:20:37.479 an adult, like I finally feel more focused and like 0:20:38.200 --> 0:20:40.800 in line with my interests. So now I can be 0:20:40.800 --> 0:20:44.640 more specific about the classes I want to take, Whereas 0:20:44.840 --> 0:20:46.840 now then it was like you don't feel like you 0:20:46.880 --> 0:20:49.080 have a choice, you have to decide, and like this 0:20:49.240 --> 0:20:55.200 is it? So I mean honestly though, when I left college, 0:20:55.359 --> 0:20:57.080 it was because I had a better I had a 0:20:57.119 --> 0:20:59.760 great I was getting a great job opportunity that I 0:20:59.760 --> 0:21:02.040 felt like I couldn't pass up, and it was it 0:21:02.200 --> 0:21:04.639 was like the best thing for me. Like I'm glad 0:21:04.640 --> 0:21:07.000 that I left college. 0:21:07.280 --> 0:21:10.480 I'm definitely glad that I left. I think I think 0:21:11.760 --> 0:21:13.720 you have like college people and then you have non 0:21:13.760 --> 0:21:17.800 college people. You know, for some people, you can go 0:21:17.840 --> 0:21:19.320 to college, you can knock it out, you can finish 0:21:19.359 --> 0:21:20.200 it high I wasn't. 0:21:20.000 --> 0:21:22.920 Making sure enough me. That's what it is, like really. 0:21:22.760 --> 0:21:25.000 I can barely focus as right now. 0:21:25.920 --> 0:21:27.760 I want to go back to school, though I do too, 0:21:28.000 --> 0:21:31.560 but like then, I don't know. And I did good 0:21:31.560 --> 0:21:35.400 in high school, like I had good grades, and like 0:21:35.480 --> 0:21:37.000 college was always so important. 0:21:37.080 --> 0:21:39.240 We were talking about college when I was like eleven. 0:21:39.359 --> 0:21:41.640 That's when we started to talk about college and think 0:21:41.640 --> 0:21:44.520 about future schools and right, like that huge deal because 0:21:44.520 --> 0:21:47.760 I went to like this really bougie what's it called 0:21:48.560 --> 0:21:51.040 element middle school and they were always they were just 0:21:51.080 --> 0:21:53.399 like trying to suck anyone's moneyway, Like that's when they 0:21:53.440 --> 0:21:56.239 start those like rich white privileged people, that's when they 0:21:56.240 --> 0:21:59.520 start just deciding like Okay, I'm gonna start investing in 0:21:59.520 --> 0:22:02.400 this college when she's this age, so they know who 0:22:02.400 --> 0:22:04.680 she is. And by the time it's time to graduate, 0:22:04.920 --> 0:22:08.040 we've already created this relationship. I've been donating to this fund, 0:22:08.880 --> 0:22:13.000 you know, Nigga, I know Julie mm hmmm, And you 0:22:13.040 --> 0:22:15.320 start really trying to make those connections. It's a whole 0:22:15.440 --> 0:22:19.280 Even like this elementary kindergartenship feels like it's. 0:22:19.160 --> 0:22:22.120 A lot of socializing and know it's like Jesus Christ. 0:22:22.320 --> 0:22:24.240 It's really just very political. 0:22:26.960 --> 0:22:29.560 I think about Iri too, I think, like, what would 0:22:29.560 --> 0:22:31.520 she what would I do? Am I going to encourage 0:22:31.520 --> 0:22:34.479 her to go to college? Part of me is like, well, 0:22:34.480 --> 0:22:36.920 obviously I'm going to encourage it. I'm not gonna say 0:22:37.040 --> 0:22:39.040 just I don't know. I think I think I'm going 0:22:39.119 --> 0:22:39.720 to encourage it. 0:22:39.760 --> 0:22:40.040 I don't. 0:22:40.440 --> 0:22:43.960 I don't think I feel comfortable just being like, we'll 0:22:44.000 --> 0:22:45.760 figure it out on your own. I definitely want to 0:22:45.760 --> 0:22:48.359 at least encourage it and then allow her to figure 0:22:48.400 --> 0:22:53.000 it out on her own. I always think, because she might, 0:22:53.040 --> 0:22:54.880 she'll probably make the decision she wants to make. 0:22:54.920 --> 0:22:56.560 Anyway, you know, it's. 0:22:57.000 --> 0:22:59.920 Making the camera shake. Sorry, sorry, I can't. 0:23:00.800 --> 0:23:04.560 It's crazy because in high school, yeah, I knew I 0:23:04.560 --> 0:23:06.720 didn't have a choice but to go to college. And 0:23:06.760 --> 0:23:09.920 I remember having this conversation with like mine and my friends, 0:23:09.920 --> 0:23:10.720 and she's like, I don't know if I. 0:23:10.760 --> 0:23:12.960 Want to go, and I was thinking, like what a privilege. 0:23:13.119 --> 0:23:15.240 I was like, it's different for me because I'm like 0:23:15.280 --> 0:23:16.720 a black woman, and I think I have to be 0:23:16.760 --> 0:23:20.040 like that much more prepared in the work field. 0:23:20.240 --> 0:23:22.359 That was really you do that? It's true. 0:23:22.359 --> 0:23:24.240 I had I felt like and I had been. It 0:23:24.280 --> 0:23:26.600 even drilled in me, like that's what we're going to do. 0:23:26.720 --> 0:23:29.240 There was no question if. Like and I know as 0:23:29.280 --> 0:23:30.680 I go to a black school because both my parents 0:23:30.760 --> 0:23:33.960 went to a HPCU, and really I was like, I 0:23:34.040 --> 0:23:37.720 mean the fuck up out of here, like yep, first 0:23:37.720 --> 0:23:38.720 thing smoking, I'm out. 0:23:38.840 --> 0:23:41.359 And I think for that meant for that in that 0:23:41.520 --> 0:23:42.399 man like manner. 0:23:42.640 --> 0:23:46.280 It was good for me because I got out on 0:23:46.320 --> 0:23:49.119 my own fee, you know, like I became independent and 0:23:49.160 --> 0:23:51.440 I was in a different city. And really why I 0:23:51.480 --> 0:23:53.479 stopped going to school is because I had to start working. 0:23:54.040 --> 0:23:57.639 And honestly, I had been in school. It was like 0:23:57.680 --> 0:24:01.800 my was it my freshman year, second semester? Freshman year 0:24:01.920 --> 0:24:05.280 or second year? Second semester? And I went to go 0:24:05.840 --> 0:24:08.240 apply for the dance team and I had to get 0:24:08.240 --> 0:24:12.240 transcripts and they're like it was April. They're like, you're 0:24:12.240 --> 0:24:15.119 not financially enrolled this semester. I was like, what do 0:24:15.160 --> 0:24:17.160 you mean, I've been going to class all semester. 0:24:17.560 --> 0:24:18.640 I live on campus. 0:24:18.640 --> 0:24:21.400 They're like, you were never find your classes were dropped 0:24:21.440 --> 0:24:24.840 in February. You were not financially enrolled. There's no transcript. 0:24:24.880 --> 0:24:26.480 I was like How did not one teacher tell me 0:24:26.600 --> 0:24:29.800 black schools? Not one teacher tell me I wasn't on 0:24:30.240 --> 0:24:31.280 the like the roster. 0:24:32.640 --> 0:24:33.919 So I'm in shock. 0:24:34.400 --> 0:24:36.080 I go on the hallway and I call my dad 0:24:36.119 --> 0:24:38.800 and I'm like, please tell me you didn't pay my 0:24:38.800 --> 0:24:42.000 twition and didn't tell me, And this nigga was like, 0:24:42.400 --> 0:24:48.280 let me call you right back. I was like, this 0:24:48.320 --> 0:24:53.639 is not happening. This is not fucking happening. So I 0:24:53.680 --> 0:24:56.240 just remember going back to my dorm and telling my homegirl. 0:24:56.280 --> 0:24:59.200 I'm like, yeah, I gotta get a job. 0:25:00.000 --> 0:25:02.320 It was the next day we went out and literally, 0:25:02.320 --> 0:25:04.120 like the first we went to like a couple of restaurants. 0:25:04.160 --> 0:25:06.120 Because I had dated a girl who worked at PF 0:25:06.200 --> 0:25:08.040 Chanks and I knew she made a lot of money serving. 0:25:08.080 --> 0:25:09.240 I was like, I think we should try to be 0:25:09.440 --> 0:25:13.359 servers like Chris. We went to Hula Hans. They hired 0:25:13.440 --> 0:25:14.119 us on the spot. 0:25:14.960 --> 0:25:16.200 I forgot to take a jacket. The day it was 0:25:16.200 --> 0:25:17.879 real cold. We got off the train. This I was like, 0:25:17.880 --> 0:25:19.480 the next nigga who pulls up on us. We're getting 0:25:19.480 --> 0:25:22.520 in the car, it's too cold. I'm not saying no anymore. 0:25:22.920 --> 0:25:24.320 This crazy nigga pulled up on us. 0:25:24.359 --> 0:25:25.560 He was like, yeah, I get in the car. 0:25:25.600 --> 0:25:27.720 I was like, let's go. We got in the car 0:25:27.800 --> 0:25:30.840 and shit smoked me. Anyway, the point is I didn't 0:25:30.840 --> 0:25:33.639 really like have a choice. So I was just like, oh, okay, 0:25:33.720 --> 0:25:36.240 people are they're doing functionhit and I got I'm out 0:25:36.240 --> 0:25:38.680 here now and I wasn't going home. And we got 0:25:38.680 --> 0:25:41.320 a job and I started making money and I start 0:25:41.359 --> 0:25:43.720 working at the w and I was making bookoo dollars 0:25:43.760 --> 0:25:46.119 and I was like class, who what Oh. 0:25:46.040 --> 0:25:47.959 So you weren't were you trying to pay your school 0:25:48.080 --> 0:25:48.720 or you were just. 0:25:49.040 --> 0:25:51.360 Well that's I was like, you guys need to figure 0:25:51.359 --> 0:25:51.600 it out. 0:25:51.680 --> 0:25:53.280 I knew I wasn't gonna be like and that's another 0:25:53.280 --> 0:25:57.200 thing looking back, like HBCUs are super expensive, and granted 0:25:57.200 --> 0:25:59.080 I got that experience. I never took out any loans, 0:25:59.080 --> 0:26:01.200 but I have friends who too got loans and completed 0:26:01.480 --> 0:26:04.120 but are paying it back, like thirteen hundred dollars loans. 0:26:03.920 --> 0:26:06.600 A month, eight hundred dollars loans a month. 0:26:07.280 --> 0:26:09.800 And I like, if you're going to finish school, I 0:26:09.800 --> 0:26:11.679 think it's best to go to community college. If you're 0:26:11.760 --> 0:26:13.000 right sure enough know you want to do do two 0:26:13.080 --> 0:26:14.160 years and then transfer. 0:26:14.520 --> 0:26:15.159 I think there's what. 0:26:15.440 --> 0:26:17.000 I feel like that would have been a lot more 0:26:17.480 --> 0:26:19.639 like better for a lot more better for me, better 0:26:19.720 --> 0:26:22.520 for me. I think moving to New York at seventeen 0:26:22.680 --> 0:26:25.840 was so overwhelming for me. I was too immature to 0:26:25.920 --> 0:26:27.959 be like, first of all, living on my own and 0:26:28.000 --> 0:26:31.520 in a different city, all these all this pressure suddenly like. 0:26:32.680 --> 0:26:34.280 It was just it was too much. 0:26:34.359 --> 0:26:37.280 I feel like there needs to be Like I think 0:26:37.280 --> 0:26:39.159 there needs to be like a year between college. 0:26:39.480 --> 0:26:40.760 I don't know. It was the best time in my 0:26:40.840 --> 0:26:41.360 fucking life. 0:26:41.680 --> 0:26:42.880 Yeah, but you didn't finish. 0:26:43.280 --> 0:26:45.440 No, I just mean, like, then that's what we're talking about, 0:26:45.480 --> 0:26:47.399 Like she wants to finish college, Like if you have, 0:26:47.520 --> 0:26:49.320 she's questioning if she should finish or not. 0:26:49.440 --> 0:26:51.760 If you have, if you're halfway through, if you have 0:26:51.760 --> 0:26:54.080 the discipline to do it, if you have the financial 0:26:54.119 --> 0:26:56.320 means and you're there by all means to push through. 0:26:56.840 --> 0:26:58.439 However, if I feel like, do. 0:26:58.440 --> 0:27:00.520 You what's your what do you want to do? Do 0:27:00.560 --> 0:27:02.080 you have any idea? What are you gonna do if 0:27:02.080 --> 0:27:03.800 you're not in college? Do you have some sort of plan? 0:27:03.840 --> 0:27:06.280 Like Jamila's plan was she she did what she had 0:27:06.320 --> 0:27:08.000 to do, She worked, and she paid her You paid 0:27:08.000 --> 0:27:10.320 your shit off for me, like I got an opportunity 0:27:10.359 --> 0:27:12.440 that was like I'm going to be making more money, 0:27:12.440 --> 0:27:14.760 I'm gonna be traveling, I'm gonna be assisting this person. 0:27:15.520 --> 0:27:18.639 Fuck it, don't just drop out of college to do nothing, 0:27:18.920 --> 0:27:20.359 is what I'm saying, you know. 0:27:20.560 --> 0:27:22.760 I mean because essentially, when I look back at I 0:27:22.880 --> 0:27:26.040 like I worked, I'm waitress. But then I was like, Okay, 0:27:26.040 --> 0:27:29.360 I've had enough work experience to realize. I was working 0:27:29.359 --> 0:27:32.879 at a hotel in a bar, and I saw people 0:27:32.880 --> 0:27:36.439 who had been there fifteen years, eighteen years now their 0:27:36.560 --> 0:27:38.600 daughter was working there, and it was just a thing 0:27:39.000 --> 0:27:40.720 like years and even when I went back, those people 0:27:40.760 --> 0:27:43.639 are still working there, and I really, for me, I 0:27:43.680 --> 0:27:45.399 was like, well, I'm not going to be doing this forever. 0:27:45.840 --> 0:27:46.639 I can't see that. 0:27:47.160 --> 0:27:50.560 And so I came back to California, even though initially 0:27:50.560 --> 0:27:51.719 I felt like that was failing. 0:27:51.800 --> 0:27:53.440 I felt like I didn't want to come back with nothing. 0:27:54.000 --> 0:27:57.359 I had this emotional connection to this degree that I 0:27:57.400 --> 0:27:59.360 didn't really have a purpose for. And I came back 0:27:59.359 --> 0:28:01.120 and I was like, I'm just what were you going 0:28:01.119 --> 0:28:03.879 to school for PR? Public relations? Which I guess this 0:28:04.000 --> 0:28:08.679 is very PR. You got my phone it's not an 0:28:08.680 --> 0:28:15.679 airplane moment it is. I thought, oh. 0:28:15.680 --> 0:28:16.120 That's my. 0:28:17.640 --> 0:28:18.760 That's is it recording? 0:28:20.440 --> 0:28:22.280 Can you check it and see if it still is sure? 0:28:23.119 --> 0:28:27.359 Because sometimes when someone calls it like stops it. 0:28:29.800 --> 0:28:30.359 Yeah. 0:28:30.160 --> 0:28:34.040 Oh. I felt like I like, I don't know. 0:28:34.040 --> 0:28:36.440 I had this thing like I don't like starting stuff 0:28:36.440 --> 0:28:39.320 and not finishing it, and I don't like being defeated. 0:28:39.360 --> 0:28:42.320 And I felt that's what I had done. But I 0:28:42.360 --> 0:28:42.720 came back. 0:28:42.760 --> 0:28:44.320 I went, I told myself when I was going to 0:28:44.360 --> 0:28:47.160 learn lashes, I had a plan. I wanted to be mobile. 0:28:47.200 --> 0:28:48.520 I knew didn't want to work for anyone. I didn't 0:28:48.520 --> 0:28:51.040 want to tell anyone to talk to me, and that, 0:28:51.200 --> 0:28:51.480 you know. 0:28:51.440 --> 0:28:54.480 That's that created freedom to like really think about what 0:28:54.520 --> 0:28:55.040 I want to do. 0:28:56.080 --> 0:28:57.800 And I just had this thought the other day, which 0:28:57.840 --> 0:29:00.360 is crazy, and I was like back there the time, 0:29:00.400 --> 0:29:02.800 I would judge people who are like starving artists, like 0:29:02.840 --> 0:29:05.040 I know people who are like so dedicated to their craft, 0:29:05.120 --> 0:29:06.840 Like I'm like, bitchbo, don't you just get a job, 0:29:06.920 --> 0:29:10.280 like you're you're tripping, like you're on somebody's couch. But now, 0:29:10.440 --> 0:29:14.600 like honestly, right now, I can honestly I understand being 0:29:14.680 --> 0:29:18.440 insanely passionate about some something that you have really no 0:29:18.600 --> 0:29:21.920 desire to do anything else. And you know, like I 0:29:22.520 --> 0:29:24.560 could get a cocktail job. I could like I have 0:29:24.640 --> 0:29:28.080 experienced during other things. But I have to keep telling 0:29:28.120 --> 0:29:32.840 myself is that being true to my purpose? And I 0:29:32.880 --> 0:29:35.840 think we have these like dedicated ideas of what we're 0:29:35.840 --> 0:29:38.960 supposed to do and what timeframe, and that's not really 0:29:39.040 --> 0:29:41.720 that doesn't always honor our true purpose. 0:29:42.840 --> 0:29:43.360 That's true. 0:29:43.560 --> 0:29:46.800 And sometimes you don't find your purpose at seventeen. A 0:29:46.800 --> 0:29:48.680 lot you don't find you don't know what you want 0:29:48.720 --> 0:29:49.520 to do at eighteen. 0:29:49.640 --> 0:29:52.440 I mean, but lord, I wish I wish I did 0:29:52.560 --> 0:29:55.160 have that have the freedom to explore it, because maybe 0:29:55.160 --> 0:29:57.640 I would have found that much sooner. Like had I 0:29:57.720 --> 0:29:59.960 not just thought one plus one equals too good a degree, 0:30:00.080 --> 0:30:01.840 do this, then that then I would have if I 0:30:01.880 --> 0:30:03.840 had the freedom to be like, Okay, we'll figure it out, 0:30:03.960 --> 0:30:05.840 like try this, try that, what do you what are 0:30:05.880 --> 0:30:06.560 your interest in? 0:30:07.240 --> 0:30:10.000 Maybe we could have come upon this sooner and then. 0:30:10.760 --> 0:30:12.680 Yeah, because I don't feel like education has to end. 0:30:12.720 --> 0:30:14.920 I think it's the way they frame college. It becomes 0:30:14.920 --> 0:30:17.120 this like this is the end all be all You've 0:30:17.280 --> 0:30:21.440 reach you've reached this is the moment you must decide, 0:30:21.920 --> 0:30:23.760 who are you done. 0:30:24.480 --> 0:30:25.600 For the rest of your life? 0:30:29.120 --> 0:30:29.880 What happened? 0:30:30.120 --> 0:30:34.440 I don't know, how did you do that? 0:30:35.720 --> 0:30:41.720 Okay with. 0:30:43.880 --> 0:30:46.720 I think there's one end it's about Yeah, I think 0:30:46.720 --> 0:30:50.920 it's above the toilet, thank you. 0:30:52.800 --> 0:30:53.440 Uh yeah. 0:30:53.480 --> 0:30:55.800 But it's like that, it's like this big defining thing 0:30:55.840 --> 0:30:58.280 that's supposed to define the rest the trajectory of the 0:30:58.280 --> 0:31:00.520 rest of your life. Who you are, what, how you 0:31:00.560 --> 0:31:02.640 make your money, how you define yourself? 0:31:03.360 --> 0:31:07.240 Like, yeah, so I don't know. 0:31:07.360 --> 0:31:12.360 I feel like, I truly feel though, like you need 0:31:12.440 --> 0:31:14.800 like a year off before you go into college. There 0:31:14.800 --> 0:31:18.200 needs to be like a in between year that's still 0:31:18.320 --> 0:31:21.080 educational but prepares you for I don't I don't even 0:31:21.080 --> 0:31:23.000 know if there's an amount of time actually, because I 0:31:23.000 --> 0:31:25.640 feel like it's taken me to reach my thirties to 0:31:25.640 --> 0:31:27.959 feel motivated to go back to school, to feel ready 0:31:28.840 --> 0:31:31.240 and I'm not quite right, and to feel like I'm 0:31:31.280 --> 0:31:33.040 like ready and to feel excited. 0:31:32.680 --> 0:31:34.600 About it right, you know, fun. 0:31:34.760 --> 0:31:37.320 Yeah, Like I don't want to overwhelm myself. 0:31:37.320 --> 0:31:39.400 And that's the thing too, Like I control how much 0:31:39.400 --> 0:31:41.880 I want to do, whereas in college you must. 0:31:41.640 --> 0:31:45.360 Take minimal schedule, like I'm. 0:31:45.200 --> 0:31:49.080 Gonna take two classes, We're gonna start there and that's it. 0:31:49.280 --> 0:31:54.480 So but I definitely, how do you feel like you 0:31:54.480 --> 0:31:57.600 you know what I mean, We're we're at the age 0:31:57.640 --> 0:31:59.840 now where we're starting to well, we're starting to invest 0:31:59.840 --> 0:32:03.520 in time money into education for our children. And I 0:32:03.600 --> 0:32:05.560 think for me that's why I also college felt like 0:32:05.600 --> 0:32:07.600 I had to do it because my mom invested so 0:32:07.800 --> 0:32:10.400 much into my education, the schools that I went to, 0:32:11.720 --> 0:32:14.000 like the links she went to make sure we could 0:32:14.040 --> 0:32:18.840 afford them, the NAT Prep. Yeah, like that, I felt 0:32:18.840 --> 0:32:22.080 like I had to, you know. So, and I'm kind 0:32:22.080 --> 0:32:23.840 of already starting that with Ira. I have her in 0:32:23.840 --> 0:32:26.360 a school that you know, is more expensive than the norm, 0:32:26.480 --> 0:32:29.360 the norm school, it's not free. And now we're talking 0:32:29.400 --> 0:32:33.440 about kindergarten and they're talking about twenty three thousand dollars 0:32:33.520 --> 0:32:36.760 for kindergarten or this school. It's like, oh, you can 0:32:36.760 --> 0:32:38.200 go to send her to a magnet for free, or 0:32:38.240 --> 0:32:39.960 you did this. This is great here, and this is 0:32:40.000 --> 0:32:44.040 great there. And it's just so confusing and also ridiculous 0:32:44.040 --> 0:32:47.640 because I'm like, is it worth investing that much in kindergarten? 0:32:48.120 --> 0:32:51.040 And then some people say yeah, start now, get used 0:32:51.080 --> 0:32:53.160 to it now, and then other people say, oh, you 0:32:53.200 --> 0:32:57.000 can wait. But in all and all, I know that 0:32:58.200 --> 0:33:00.440 I'm going to invest in her education and I'm going 0:33:00.480 --> 0:33:02.800 to encourage her to go to college. I mean, if 0:33:02.840 --> 0:33:05.840 she wants to take off a year or I don't know, 0:33:05.960 --> 0:33:10.040 like maybe I just have to, Like I wouldn't be 0:33:10.080 --> 0:33:13.280 disappointed if she didn't, but I'm going to encourage her 0:33:13.720 --> 0:33:17.080 to continue to educate herself, right, don't just stop, because 0:33:17.080 --> 0:33:19.240 that's another thing. It's like it's like you either keep 0:33:19.280 --> 0:33:22.320 going or you're just done learning, right, right, And it's like, 0:33:22.600 --> 0:33:25.320 I think we can keep going and learning. It doesn't 0:33:25.360 --> 0:33:29.000 happen to be in the form of a university. But 0:33:29.040 --> 0:33:31.840 as long as we're keeping this going while you figure 0:33:31.840 --> 0:33:34.200 it out and then maybe come back to figuring out 0:33:34.200 --> 0:33:35.920 what you want to do, we're. 0:33:35.800 --> 0:33:37.920 Getting a job doing or like okay, start a. 0:33:37.840 --> 0:33:40.400 Bus experience, yeah, start a business. Then we are in 0:33:40.440 --> 0:33:42.160 the era of entrepreneurship. 0:33:42.400 --> 0:33:49.400 So I think that's that's where we're headed as a 0:33:50.600 --> 0:33:51.240 like a people. 0:33:52.080 --> 0:33:54.080 But also it's. 0:33:53.840 --> 0:33:57.200 It's kind of scary because I have like friends who 0:33:57.240 --> 0:33:59.240 have younger cousins who are like in their twenty early 0:33:59.320 --> 0:34:01.560 twenties and like they have like one friend that's like 0:34:01.600 --> 0:34:04.640 a makeup blogger and they're you know, and it's like 0:34:04.760 --> 0:34:07.720 almost a disillusion to like working hard and like the 0:34:07.760 --> 0:34:09.040 reality of. 0:34:10.960 --> 0:34:12.160 What successful is is. 0:34:12.120 --> 0:34:13.840 Where they think you could just take pretty pictures and 0:34:13.880 --> 0:34:16.600 then you're gonna make money. And I think that's also 0:34:16.719 --> 0:34:20.120 like that's what I fear about this generation, Like they're 0:34:20.320 --> 0:34:23.760 not really understanding like before there was this pressure to 0:34:23.800 --> 0:34:26.040 be successful in school and then go to college and 0:34:26.080 --> 0:34:32.440 like actually have some backing to whatever you're trying like direction, 0:34:32.640 --> 0:34:36.239 But now there's like this misunderstood. 0:34:35.520 --> 0:34:38.399 Well, you have culture, you had to have credibility in whatever, right, 0:34:38.600 --> 0:34:41.440 whatever your career path was. Gonna be your doctor, you 0:34:41.440 --> 0:34:43.759 better have gone to med school. Like you want to 0:34:43.800 --> 0:34:45.200 be a lawyer, you need to go to law school. 0:34:45.360 --> 0:34:46.680 You want to be in PR, you need to have 0:34:46.719 --> 0:34:49.560 gone to either marketing or PR to become an expert 0:34:49.640 --> 0:34:49.880 at that. 0:34:50.080 --> 0:34:53.040 Right. How do you become an expert at social meeting R? Right? 0:34:53.120 --> 0:34:56.160 And I'm just thinking, like, oh, well, I have X 0:34:56.200 --> 0:34:58.960 amount of followers, Oh I'm gonna go viral, And that's 0:34:59.040 --> 0:35:02.520 not realistic, I don't think so. I think it's like 0:35:02.600 --> 0:35:05.759 kinda also produces this like kind of can produce this delusional, 0:35:06.640 --> 0:35:10.480 annoying customer service person that I seem to always fucking 0:35:10.480 --> 0:35:11.440 get when I go. 0:35:11.480 --> 0:35:13.120 Out and I'm like, who trained you? 0:35:13.200 --> 0:35:13.959 What are you talking about? 0:35:14.200 --> 0:35:16.080 Like, I think the millennials, like, have you ever had 0:35:16.080 --> 0:35:18.400 customers Okay, well. 0:35:19.400 --> 0:35:21.160 I'm a elder millennial. 0:35:23.440 --> 0:35:24.719 An elder millennial. 0:35:26.400 --> 0:35:30.080 No, oh g oh, but I know you know what 0:35:30.120 --> 0:35:30.719 I'm talking about. 0:35:30.760 --> 0:35:33.040 Have you ever had like a really bad customer service 0:35:33.080 --> 0:35:36.760 experience with someone who's just not equipped to do customer 0:35:36.800 --> 0:35:39.160 service because they're just young and dumb and on their phone. 0:35:39.640 --> 0:35:42.839 Yeah, And I'm like, who the fuck? Lets you get 0:35:42.880 --> 0:35:43.239 a job? 0:35:44.280 --> 0:35:46.400 And I'm glad do you have one? But like, I 0:35:46.400 --> 0:35:48.640 think that's kind of the culture that's created. So that's 0:35:48.640 --> 0:35:51.919 my only thing that feels weary about, like telling kids 0:35:51.920 --> 0:35:54.080 don't worry about going to college because now you just 0:35:54.160 --> 0:35:57.440 have I don't know, theresein be like really smart or 0:35:57.480 --> 0:35:58.280 really dumb. 0:35:58.920 --> 0:36:05.480 It's true because that do so do we answer her question? 0:36:07.160 --> 0:36:09.839 I think it's just about going within and not doing 0:36:09.880 --> 0:36:15.920 anything for anyone else and actually having a plan. I 0:36:15.960 --> 0:36:17.840 definitely think if you have a notion of what you 0:36:17.880 --> 0:36:19.440 want to do and you think it could be successful, 0:36:19.560 --> 0:36:21.239 then go that route because you don't want to waste 0:36:21.280 --> 0:36:23.120 time doing things that are not really I. 0:36:23.440 --> 0:36:25.560 Think you need to ask yourselves a few questions, like 0:36:25.680 --> 0:36:27.480 why why is it that you don't want to go 0:36:27.480 --> 0:36:29.239 to school? Is it because you want to focus on 0:36:29.320 --> 0:36:33.560 something else? Do you maybe are your interests different? Do 0:36:33.600 --> 0:36:35.760 you want to take a year off to travel and explore? 0:36:36.400 --> 0:36:39.920 Can you, you know, can you afford to do that? 0:36:40.680 --> 0:36:42.520 Like you know all these Can. 0:36:42.400 --> 0:36:45.080 You maybe go to school and study abroad and do that? 0:36:45.680 --> 0:36:48.719 Can you pick up a trade that will facilitate you know, 0:36:49.200 --> 0:36:50.080 you figuring out? 0:36:51.320 --> 0:36:56.640 Yeah? I think yeah, you be smart about it. 0:36:56.680 --> 0:37:00.680 Don't be brash, because honestly, college isn't going anywhere. 0:37:01.000 --> 0:37:02.680 You can always go back to school, babe. 0:37:02.719 --> 0:37:07.400 Excuse me, Okay, my daughter's crawling across the table and 0:37:07.680 --> 0:37:08.560 the camera. 0:37:10.040 --> 0:37:10.520 Shut. 0:37:11.360 --> 0:37:12.920 If you want to check out Iri, make sure to 0:37:13.000 --> 0:37:17.680 join our Patreon Patreon dot com search Good Momsbad Choices 0:37:17.760 --> 0:37:19.920 dot com to watch this full episode. 0:37:20.239 --> 0:37:23.879 Also send up for our newsletters exclusive drops in the newsletters, 0:37:23.920 --> 0:37:24.480 drop shops. 0:37:26.080 --> 0:37:28.600 We haven't killed it on the newsletters We've been sending 0:37:29.000 --> 0:37:31.879 oll not we Jamila sending a lot of newsletters. 0:37:32.000 --> 0:37:34.560 She's on it. She's on Faya faya. 0:37:37.160 --> 0:37:40.600 I think maybe you'll even include like a more detailed 0:37:41.080 --> 0:37:45.600 thirty two and our dear diary, Diary of a goodness? 0:37:45.600 --> 0:37:48.239 Is that my homework? You're giving me homework right now? Great? 0:37:48.440 --> 0:37:50.560 She hates something stiller, She has to commit the things 0:37:50.560 --> 0:37:51.840 that I said on the podcast. 0:37:51.880 --> 0:37:55.120 Okay, I know you always do this out loud and 0:37:55.160 --> 0:37:58.600 then I'm like, now everyone's waiting for it, like our 0:37:58.960 --> 0:38:00.160 exclusive merch. 0:38:09.920 --> 0:38:19.719 Time for hories. Oh stories, Oh do you have a 0:38:19.880 --> 0:38:22.320 do you have a horror to share? Are you sure? 0:38:22.920 --> 0:38:23.800 Are you positive? 0:38:25.440 --> 0:38:25.680 Shy? 0:38:26.040 --> 0:38:30.360 Are you shy? You can't be shy? On good Moms? 0:38:31.760 --> 0:38:33.360 Are you there eating my baby's candy? 0:38:35.480 --> 0:38:39.920 Okay, yes, baby, Okay, okay, I'm almost done five minutes. 0:38:43.000 --> 0:38:45.359 What okay, I forgot? 0:38:45.440 --> 0:38:47.160 What's about? Is it good? 0:38:47.560 --> 0:38:48.080 I think it's good? 0:38:48.160 --> 0:38:49.600 Okay, go ahead, I think. 0:38:49.440 --> 0:38:50.239 Okay, okay. 0:38:50.719 --> 0:38:53.000 So me and my new current boyfriend of three years 0:38:53.040 --> 0:38:57.000 first started talking initially as we knew so now remember initially, 0:38:57.000 --> 0:38:58.799 as we knew some of the same people, and he'd 0:38:58.840 --> 0:39:01.160 always tried to slide in the d what. 0:39:03.160 --> 0:39:05.799 So me and my now, oh they knew okay, they 0:39:05.880 --> 0:39:08.080 knew okay, they had mutual friends. 0:39:08.280 --> 0:39:09.480 He was sliding in the DMS. 0:39:10.200 --> 0:39:17.400 He isn't my usual type white loud, but we'd always 0:39:17.400 --> 0:39:20.000 send music back and forth, and his music history knowledge 0:39:20.000 --> 0:39:22.680 of every genre is fire, which is huge to me. 0:39:22.800 --> 0:39:24.520 So I agreed to meet him one day. 0:39:24.920 --> 0:39:27.520 Me too, So I agreed to meet him one day 0:39:27.520 --> 0:39:29.240 when I was at the beach and he was nearby. 0:39:30.400 --> 0:39:32.680 He smoked a few joints together, and he was honestly 0:39:32.680 --> 0:39:37.080 one of the funniest, non judgmental, very important, later most 0:39:37.120 --> 0:39:39.640 open minded, and kindest people I'd ever met. So I 0:39:39.680 --> 0:39:42.439 was open to us going on a proper date, which 0:39:42.440 --> 0:39:45.600 he kept suggesting throughout. Plus he was a really cool 0:39:45.640 --> 0:39:49.600 style and a super confident very important. So anyway, the 0:39:49.680 --> 0:39:51.680 day of the first proper date rolls around and we 0:39:51.719 --> 0:39:54.000 meet at this pub bar over the water on an 0:39:54.040 --> 0:39:56.640 early summer evening, and it was lovely. For some reason, 0:39:56.719 --> 0:39:58.920 when I drink sometimes I can't get on a level, 0:39:59.000 --> 0:40:01.120 so I either can't get drunk, or the same amount 0:40:01.120 --> 0:40:04.080 of drinks sends me under and I'm blackout drunk. 0:40:04.520 --> 0:40:06.320 So either she can't get drunk or she's blackout drunk. 0:40:06.719 --> 0:40:09.840 It's weird, though, because my blackout drunk doesn't always seem it, 0:40:10.000 --> 0:40:12.800 and my friends don't always pick up on it at first. Also, 0:40:12.880 --> 0:40:17.640 I could be really wild, which is obviously heightened by drinking. 0:40:16.719 --> 0:40:20.120 I think I suggest shots, and I'm drinking a lot. 0:40:20.360 --> 0:40:22.200 So when it comes to the time, the place is 0:40:22.239 --> 0:40:25.160 shedding around when I am, I suggest he comes back 0:40:25.160 --> 0:40:29.600 to mine. I was temporarily living at my parents and 0:40:29.840 --> 0:40:34.120 where my old school Jamaican grandma also lives. Okay, Also, 0:40:34.200 --> 0:40:36.600 he was really not sure in questioning my home situation, 0:40:36.680 --> 0:40:40.080 but I was very dismissive, and he was questioning it. Yeah, 0:40:40.120 --> 0:40:41.680 like why are we going to your house? Like any 0:40:41.719 --> 0:40:46.080 nigger should be. I was very dismissive and like, it's fine, 0:40:46.200 --> 0:40:49.719 come on. So he cautiously calls a cab, which we 0:40:49.760 --> 0:40:53.200 get into, and then suddenly I cannot remember my address 0:40:53.640 --> 0:40:56.400 at all or where I live, and we're both blackout 0:40:56.440 --> 0:40:58.920 drunk at this point, so we drive around for ages. 0:40:59.000 --> 0:41:02.200 I totally confuse. I'm totally confused, but the night had 0:41:02.239 --> 0:41:04.680 been amazing, so we're all over each other. I have 0:41:04.760 --> 0:41:08.120 no idea how, but we finally reached mine and go 0:41:08.160 --> 0:41:11.359 in the backway to the kitchen where my grandma likes 0:41:11.480 --> 0:41:13.600 to vibe with a little drink and watch most TV 0:41:13.760 --> 0:41:17.840 most evenings. She's super extrover and my parents, how in, 0:41:17.920 --> 0:41:19.720 my parents' house is a bit of a party house, 0:41:19.960 --> 0:41:22.239 as it's quite big, with me and my younger row 0:41:22.440 --> 0:41:25.160 historically always bringing friends back after a night out. 0:41:26.200 --> 0:41:26.800 My family. 0:41:27.480 --> 0:41:29.640 My fam are all super fun and chill, but my 0:41:29.640 --> 0:41:32.720 grandma's pretty suspicious but polite. 0:41:32.400 --> 0:41:34.759 About me and this guy quizzing us. 0:41:34.800 --> 0:41:36.719 But I'm playing it down a lot in my drink 0:41:36.760 --> 0:41:40.319 and dumbness, thinking I'm slick. Anyway, My now partner is 0:41:40.400 --> 0:41:44.080 silently like what the fuck, as I'd not really warned him, 0:41:44.120 --> 0:41:47.000 but I kept whispering and that it's cool, And after 0:41:47.080 --> 0:41:49.799 chatting with Grandma for a while, we sneak upstairs to 0:41:49.840 --> 0:41:51.840 go chill as my friend needs to stay. 0:41:52.800 --> 0:41:55.520 I'm twenty six at this point, these. 0:41:55.360 --> 0:41:57.600 Little gems partner twenty. 0:41:57.320 --> 0:42:01.200 Six anyway, I charge upstairs and starting out reggae, to 0:42:01.239 --> 0:42:03.879 which my stepdad, who has no idea what's happening show, 0:42:04.239 --> 0:42:07.880 shouts to turn the fuck off. This super guy's mortified 0:42:07.880 --> 0:42:09.839 at this point, but as cool as I thought I was, 0:42:09.960 --> 0:42:12.640 I reassure him that it's fine, turn the music down 0:42:12.640 --> 0:42:15.600 a bit, and literally take off all my clothes now 0:42:15.640 --> 0:42:16.760 as a personal assurance. 0:42:16.840 --> 0:42:18.440 I didn't shave before this date. 0:42:19.239 --> 0:42:21.120 And not being in a relationship for about a year, 0:42:21.320 --> 0:42:23.600 and also with it being the first few warm weeks 0:42:23.640 --> 0:42:26.480 of the year, it was wild down there. Another thing 0:42:26.520 --> 0:42:28.719 I was I saw no need to shave as I 0:42:28.800 --> 0:42:32.200 was heavily like day one on my period, so sex 0:42:32.320 --> 0:42:35.480 wasn't even on my mind for this date. Listen, I'm 0:42:35.520 --> 0:42:37.640 all for period sucks, but the way I just sprung 0:42:37.719 --> 0:42:40.080 myself and my wild bush on my period on the 0:42:40.120 --> 0:42:46.560 sky with no warning was just a lot. He was down, obviously, 0:42:46.640 --> 0:42:49.000 but after a few strokes, he's like, what the fuck, 0:42:49.040 --> 0:42:53.040 there's blood everywhere, and I'm just like, sh don't worry, 0:42:53.400 --> 0:42:57.319 don't worry about that. Have you have you never been 0:42:57.320 --> 0:42:58.480 with the real woman before? 0:42:58.520 --> 0:42:59.000 Oh god? 0:43:02.000 --> 0:43:05.120 She's like, oh my god, laugh all out girl, time 0:43:05.160 --> 0:43:06.640 of bitch. She said, what the fuck? I know? 0:43:06.800 --> 0:43:09.960 I really think I'm some natural earth Erica Badu Impress. 0:43:10.000 --> 0:43:12.400 That night, my attitude was like, you are lucky to 0:43:12.440 --> 0:43:14.680 be with this real woman who happens to be. 0:43:14.640 --> 0:43:15.360 On her period. 0:43:15.560 --> 0:43:16.000 Bitch. 0:43:16.280 --> 0:43:16.840 Alcohol. 0:43:19.239 --> 0:43:22.120 Anyway, He's pretty caught off guard, but I guess respects 0:43:22.120 --> 0:43:24.000 what I'm saying, and we continue to have. 0:43:24.000 --> 0:43:25.600 Sex and eventually fall asleep. 0:43:26.040 --> 0:43:30.480 The next God yes, the next day, he wakes up 0:43:30.520 --> 0:43:32.960 late for work as you I and I can only 0:43:33.320 --> 0:43:37.400 vaguely remember snippets of the night, each part absolutely crippling 0:43:37.440 --> 0:43:39.960 me to think about and not really wanting to know 0:43:40.120 --> 0:43:43.919 or think about my rampage. He's really sweet and cool 0:43:44.000 --> 0:43:46.160 and calls a cab, but promises to call me later. 0:43:46.520 --> 0:43:49.160 The way the shame was playing out in my head, 0:43:49.200 --> 0:43:51.040 I was just thinking this all needs to be put 0:43:51.239 --> 0:43:53.480 to the back of my mind and never brought up again. 0:43:53.960 --> 0:43:56.440 Annoying that it's with someone that I gel with is 0:43:56.480 --> 0:43:59.560 the shame, the blood I guess, just everything I gel 0:43:59.600 --> 0:44:02.239 it's so perfectly, but I genuinely can't face this when 0:44:02.280 --> 0:44:05.160 I'd been so cool and together around him all. 0:44:05.000 --> 0:44:06.279 The way up to that point. 0:44:06.440 --> 0:44:08.960 But of course I had my whole family to face 0:44:09.000 --> 0:44:11.200 up to, who had been waiting for me the next day. 0:44:11.239 --> 0:44:13.279 She's probably loud, I know, the way I had to 0:44:13.320 --> 0:44:14.959 apologize and play it all down. 0:44:15.000 --> 0:44:16.080 I wanted to die. 0:44:16.160 --> 0:44:18.880 I ignored his text too all day, but he just 0:44:18.920 --> 0:44:21.640 found it hilarious and cute and persisted with me till 0:44:21.680 --> 0:44:24.759 I stopped being proud and text him back. And now 0:44:24.840 --> 0:44:27.120 here we are for so long though he was not 0:44:27.200 --> 0:44:29.560 allowed to bring that night up. I forgot to mention 0:44:29.600 --> 0:44:31.759 when we wake up naive to the whole night. There 0:44:31.840 --> 0:44:35.600 is blood everywhere everywhere, as though there's been a massacre, 0:44:35.840 --> 0:44:37.960 as if waking up naked in bed together after a 0:44:38.040 --> 0:44:40.399 first date, trying to be polite and piece together that 0:44:40.400 --> 0:44:42.799 you know you were wild as you were wild at 0:44:42.880 --> 0:44:45.680 isn't already awkward enough in a normal situation. 0:44:45.800 --> 0:44:47.280 I just had to get out. 0:44:51.239 --> 0:44:52.319 Woful. 0:44:52.800 --> 0:44:58.640 Yeah, basically, it's like my lipstick story, but period blood. 0:44:58.320 --> 0:45:00.560 Everywhere with your grandma little brother. 0:45:02.840 --> 0:45:05.160 But her parents probably were used to that ship, right. 0:45:09.160 --> 0:45:10.680 I don't want to know. I don't I don't know. 0:45:10.719 --> 0:45:12.000 I don't want to hear how we have sex. 0:45:12.120 --> 0:45:14.680 I'm cool, I'm cool. Mortified. 0:45:14.880 --> 0:45:17.799 Yeah no, don't bring a niggas back to the house. 0:45:17.920 --> 0:45:18.400 I'm cool. 0:45:19.400 --> 0:45:22.840 Get your own house. Go get your own house. I 0:45:22.880 --> 0:45:25.080 don't like, I don't care what you do. Just don't 0:45:25.080 --> 0:45:25.680 do it here. 0:45:27.160 --> 0:45:29.279 Unless we're on a family vacation and they have no 0:45:29.360 --> 0:45:30.239 other choice. 0:45:30.640 --> 0:45:35.080 I mean, just keep it, keep it cute, keep it cute, 0:45:35.920 --> 0:45:36.400 just keep it. 0:45:36.760 --> 0:45:46.759 Keep the cute. Oh man, All right, well, thanks for 0:45:46.800 --> 0:45:47.200 tuning in. 0:45:47.239 --> 0:45:49.279 Guys, catch you next week. 0:45:49.520 --> 0:45:52.720 Follow us on Instagram, Good Mom's Underscore, Bad Choices. 0:45:53.840 --> 0:45:57.879 Make sure you subscribe to our newsletter and check out 0:45:58.000 --> 0:46:01.760 our week monthly events Good Moms by choices dot com. 0:46:02.040 --> 0:46:05.680 You can watch this full episode at Patreon. 0:46:06.280 --> 0:46:08.399 You know you want to watch us talk our shit, 0:46:08.600 --> 0:46:09.600 not just listen to us. 0:46:10.480 --> 0:46:13.400 Smoke smoke one with us? 0:46:14.880 --> 0:46:15.319 Is that it? 0:46:15.640 --> 0:46:15.879 Yeah? 0:46:16.120 --> 0:46:18.480 Yeah, catulating, bye. 0:46:18.280 --> 0:46:21.399 Bye snoop dog closed. Then that's what I'm groomed. Then 0:46:21.560 --> 0:46:23.439 you got my pictures on the wall and your room 0:46:23.680 --> 0:46:24.760 and girls be complaining. 0:46:24.880 --> 0:46:26.200 You keep me booming, But. 0:46:26.160 --> 0:46:28.520 Girls like that want to listen the pathoon use a 0:46:28.520 --> 0:46:31.080 college girl, but that'll stop you from doing. And come 0:46:31.080 --> 0:46:32.919 and see the dog get in the hood near you. 0:46:33.600 --> 0:46:35.960 You don't ask why world? What a crew win? Twist 0:46:36.080 --> 0:46:38.160 up my fingers and wear a dog door went on 0:46:38.200 --> 0:46:38.880 the east side. 0:46:38.880 --> 0:46:39.520 That's the wool. 0:46:39.560 --> 0:46:42.680 Watch you. Nothing I do with new to you. I 0:46:42.800 --> 0:46:44.200 smack up the water if they. 0:46:44.160 --> 0:46:44.600 Roll to you. 0:46:45.040 --> 0:46:47.040 This baby girl, you're so beautiful.