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Speaker 1: What's up with you? Wait a minute, is this the

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Speaker 1: right number?

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Speaker 2: It's a line, Go on.

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Speaker 3: Just call me back if you haven't heard the loser

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Speaker 3: line before. It works like this. Let's say someone approaches

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Speaker 3: you while you're out at the club and uses this

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Speaker 3: charming pickup line on you.

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Speaker 4: Hey, old lady, how about we go back to my

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Speaker 4: place and head straight to the bedroom.

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Speaker 3: WHOA, I'll even be a gentleman and let you ride

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Speaker 3: in my electronic chair lift up the stairs.

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Speaker 5: So fun?

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Speaker 6: It does?

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Speaker 1: It?

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Speaker 7: Does?

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Speaker 2: I agree?

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Speaker 3: Whatever you do, don't tell them to show you his

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Speaker 3: pacemaker right there.

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Speaker 1: Oh pleasure.

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Speaker 3: Instead tell them the two of you should hang sometime

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Speaker 3: and hopefully he leaves an awkward voicemail that we can

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Speaker 3: play on the air. Voicemails like this one next.

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Speaker 2: Hey Rachel, Just so you know, this is not because

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Speaker 2: I want to hook up with you. I'm actually running

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Speaker 2: for a city council and I'm hoping I can get

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Speaker 2: your vote. I'm hoping that you can tell some of

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Speaker 2: your friends and they can go and tell some of

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Speaker 2: their friends, and I can get these votes, and then

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Speaker 2: when I get elected, you can be my trophy wife.

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Speaker 4: So I was like, Wow, a young person like wanting

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Speaker 4: to participate in local politics. That's kind of cool.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.

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Speaker 3: Nothing like asking a woman directly to be your trophy

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Speaker 3: wife over a voice. Man, that's the type of moxie

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Speaker 3: that you need to be a successful politician. That's an

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Speaker 3: honest politician.

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Speaker 1: We never see that.

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Speaker 6: Next message.

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Speaker 5: Hey, then, so I don't know if you remember me,

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Speaker 5: but we've been friends on social media a long time,

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Speaker 5: and we've been trying on Facebook, and she's been following

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Speaker 5: me on Instagram for gosh like a long time now,

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Speaker 5: and I've just, you know, been seeing what you've been

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Speaker 5: up to and got a lot of similar interests. And

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Speaker 5: you're like, I stall, like six years ago you went

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Speaker 5: to this awesome art gallery and it was I was

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Speaker 5: actually at the same gallery at the same time. So

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Speaker 5: I feel like we have some secret interest there. I

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Speaker 5: know you love the beach just like I do. I

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Speaker 5: see all your amazing travel photos. So hey, maybe we

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Speaker 5: can travel together and maybe I can be in your

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Speaker 5: next instant story. And you know, I see you don't

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Speaker 5: have a girlfriend or don't post with anybody. Yeah, hit

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Speaker 5: me up. Next message.

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Speaker 6: I feel I didn't hear that to know, yeh.

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Speaker 8: Next message, Hey, Lauren, it's we met three hours ago

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Speaker 8: at the crab's table. Remember remember I was I was

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Speaker 8: at five hundred dollars and I told you to blow

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Speaker 8: on my dice for good luck. That was fun right,

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Speaker 8: funny story A lot chains in the last few hours.

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Speaker 8: I didn't realize you could lose that much money. Oh god,

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Speaker 8: I didn't even know they took credit. I was like, yeah,

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Speaker 8: let it ride right. Yeah, anyway, it looks like I'm

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Speaker 8: not gonna pay for that. S take dinner after all. Sorry,

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Speaker 8: And I could also use the ride home if you

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Speaker 8: wouldn't mind. So, Yeah, there's some guys looking at me

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Speaker 8: kind of funny. Call me back hurry.

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Speaker 4: This guy is not gonna have a good night.

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Speaker 3: Also, could I like crash at your place for like

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Speaker 3: a month? And also do you have any food left over?

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Speaker 3: Was really hungry?

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Speaker 5: Thanks, went really poorly for him at the casino.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, everyone loves.

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Speaker 4: You when you're hot, but we are losing the money.

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Speaker 6: The casino loves you.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Remember you get the special loser line number if you

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Speaker 3: text the word loser to seven eight five nine two.

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Speaker 3: Give it to somebody that is weirding you out or

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Speaker 3: is clearly going down a dark path. I hope they

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Speaker 3: can call it leave us an awkward voicemail that we can

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Speaker 3: play voicemails like this one.

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Speaker 5: Next message, justin Hi, this is from the other night.

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Speaker 7: I was just calling because I had so much fun

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Speaker 7: with you. But I did notice that you had gone

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Speaker 7: over to talk to another girl. And when I saw

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Speaker 7: you go over to that girl, I was like, what

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Speaker 7: I thought you.

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Speaker 5: And me were hitting it off?

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Speaker 7: I mean, how can you pass this up. I'm obviously

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Speaker 7: more attractive. I'm blonde. She was brunette, Like come on, and.

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Speaker 2: You know what.

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Speaker 7: I was born abnormally flexible. Like as a child, they

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Speaker 7: would call me a contortionist, you know. And I'm even

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Speaker 7: more now because now I'm the yoga instructors. I can

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Speaker 7: do a backbend and lick my own cast Next message.

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Speaker 3: Is that still a big selling point for guys, like

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Speaker 3: not just not just yoga flexible, but like NASA circus

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Speaker 3: clown flexibilit I really need a girl who can lick

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Speaker 3: her own tailbone?

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Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean, come on.

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Speaker 4: How many positions are I really usingships?

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Speaker 3: Pop your elbow back into your socket like you don't

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Speaker 3: need it anymore?

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Speaker 1: Come on, hey, betty, it's just from the barn the

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Speaker 1: other night. I just thought i'd hit sheep, see what

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Speaker 1: you're doing. I'm surprised you've been talking to me because

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Speaker 1: your friend says you only date guys with accents, and

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Speaker 1: I don't have one, or do I.

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Speaker 6: I'm going to take you on a date, Betsy. When

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Speaker 6: we go there to look at the menu, and before

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Speaker 6: I crash it with my own hands, I'm going to

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Speaker 6: order what I want from you. It's going to be

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Speaker 6: the Cason Solid and when they bring it to me,

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Speaker 6: I'm going to chop it myself. I'm going to cross

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Speaker 6: the season salad dressing bottle, so then it's all over

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Speaker 6: the place. We're going to go immediately back to my place,

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Speaker 6: and then they're going to watch Kindergarten cap and then

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Speaker 6: we're going to watch Twins with Danny the People because

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Speaker 6: pet larious.

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Speaker 7: He makes me laugh.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, that.

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Speaker 4: Was so bad to this point, I thought my impression

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Speaker 4: of Arnold was the worst.

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Speaker 6: Then he had to name the movies at the end,

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Speaker 6: just in case she didn't know.

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Speaker 3: Still hilarious. He didn't nobody else's shirt pop off during

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Speaker 3: that call, because that did it for me.

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Speaker 1: I think Brooke had a couple extra bucks.

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Speaker 2: I did.

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Speaker 4: I would have rather him do it.

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Speaker 6: Danny DeVito impression would be awesome.

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Speaker 3: Remember you can listen to Loser Line regularly at this

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Speaker 3: time every week on hundreds of our affiliates all across

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Speaker 3: North America, or on Spotify under Brook and Jeffrey Phone.

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Speaker 1: Tappen is next

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Speaker 7: Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.