WEBVTT - Stephanie Langlitz | Betrayal Weekly

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<v Speaker 1>Hi, everyone, we have some exciting news to share. ABC

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<v Speaker 1>News Studios has turned Caroline Barega's story from Betrayal season

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<v Speaker 1>four into a docu series. You'll get to meet the

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<v Speaker 1>people involved, You'll hear from people who have never spoken before,

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<v Speaker 1>and you get to see where this story took place.

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<v Speaker 1>We are so proud and excited to share it with

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<v Speaker 1>you all. Stream Betrayal Dirty Secrets now on Hulu or

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<v Speaker 1>Hulu for Disney Plus. Hi everyone, it's Andrea. Before we

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<v Speaker 1>start this episode, I want to let you know that

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<v Speaker 1>we will be talking explicitly about the realities of child

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<v Speaker 1>sexual abuse, so please be mindful with this episode.

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<v Speaker 2>I remember everything that man, for so long had so

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<v Speaker 2>much control over me. I cannot just stand by and

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<v Speaker 2>do nothing. You will not get away with this.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm Andrea Gunning, and this is Betrayal, a show about

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<v Speaker 1>the people we trust the most and the deceptions that

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<v Speaker 1>change everything. Today we are sharing Stephanie's story. Stephanie grew

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<v Speaker 1>up in upstate New York, near Albany with her parents

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<v Speaker 1>and siblings.

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<v Speaker 2>My parents had a very tumultuous relationship. I don't think

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<v Speaker 2>I coped with the chaos well. I spent a lot

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<v Speaker 2>of time in my room.

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<v Speaker 1>In her room, it was quiet. Looking out her window

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<v Speaker 1>at the woods of upstate New York, Stephanie dreamed of

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<v Speaker 1>a sunny and bright, faraway place, Los Angeles.

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<v Speaker 2>I just had this obsession with the glitz and the

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<v Speaker 2>glamor and how exciting it was then, especially for a

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<v Speaker 2>little girl in upstate New York, where it snows and

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<v Speaker 2>it's gray and it's gross. La always just had this

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<v Speaker 2>sunshine to it and always looked like it would be

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<v Speaker 2>a very happy place.

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<v Speaker 1>She hoped she could live there one day. As Stephanie

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<v Speaker 1>got older, her parents started arguing more and more. Home

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<v Speaker 1>was an exhausting place to be. Her parents split up

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<v Speaker 1>and got back together often.

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<v Speaker 2>That coincided with really difficult middle school years. Friends would

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<v Speaker 2>come and go, and it was really difficult dealing with

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<v Speaker 2>that in tandem with things that were going on with

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<v Speaker 2>my parents.

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<v Speaker 1>When Stephanie was in seventh grade, her parents announced that

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<v Speaker 1>their family would be moving across the country to Tucson, Arizona.

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<v Speaker 2>I absolutely did not want to move to Arizona. I

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<v Speaker 2>was quite literally kicking and screaming, you can't even stay

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<v Speaker 2>together for a year, Why the hell are we moving

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<v Speaker 2>across the country?

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<v Speaker 1>But Tucson did have one major perk. It was closer

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<v Speaker 1>to la.

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<v Speaker 2>They're like, look, we can drive from Tucson Hollywood anytime

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<v Speaker 2>time you want. If you stop, we'll take you to

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<v Speaker 2>Hollywood on a trip. So that kind of softened the

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<v Speaker 2>blow a little bit.

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<v Speaker 1>But when she arrived at her new middle school, she

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<v Speaker 1>struggled to make friends. The girls in her grade were

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<v Speaker 1>not welcoming.

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<v Speaker 2>Girls are just mean. If anyone has been a middle

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<v Speaker 2>school girl, you know that they can be very unkind.

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<v Speaker 1>She spent most of her time at school alone, and

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<v Speaker 1>life at home was not much of a comfort. Her

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<v Speaker 1>parents were still arguing all the time. It was lonely.

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<v Speaker 2>When I was in eighth grade, I started drinking and

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<v Speaker 2>smoking weed and started to hang out with girls that

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<v Speaker 2>were a little bit older than I was. And that

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<v Speaker 2>whole summer in between eighth grade and ninth grade was

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<v Speaker 2>just a lot of drinking in the desert.

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<v Speaker 1>The desert stretched fast and shapeless around her. She couldn't

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<v Speaker 1>figure out where she belonged in this landscape.

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<v Speaker 2>There were signs that I was unraveling. I had withdrawn

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<v Speaker 2>a lot.

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<v Speaker 1>Stephanie's mom noticed a change in her and was concerned,

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<v Speaker 1>so she took her to see a doctor.

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<v Speaker 2>I remember being hunched over, looking down, and I remember thinking,

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<v Speaker 2>this is how he's going to know that I'm depressed

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<v Speaker 2>because I can't even sit up straight. That's when I

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<v Speaker 2>was diagnosed with depression.

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<v Speaker 1>Her doctor prescribed her antidepressants. Just a few weeks later,

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<v Speaker 1>Stephanie started her freshman year of high school.

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<v Speaker 2>I went into my freshman year very much alone, feeling

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<v Speaker 2>very much isolated, very much broken. I felt like I

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<v Speaker 2>didn't really have anybody.

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<v Speaker 1>On the first day of school, Stephanie went from class

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<v Speaker 1>to class, meeting her teachers and new classmates.

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<v Speaker 2>I go into my Spanish class and the teacher, Mark

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<v Speaker 2>Lyn Drew is standing there. It was very evident right

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<v Speaker 2>away that he was trying to come off as that young, cool,

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<v Speaker 2>hip teacher, like I want to relate to you guys.

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<v Speaker 1>While his life sounded exotic, he.

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<v Speaker 2>Would say I went to Spain and I ran with

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<v Speaker 2>the bulls.

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<v Speaker 1>He was still relatable.

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<v Speaker 2>He was very into sports. He was one of the

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<v Speaker 2>JV coaches on the football team and loved Star Wars.

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<v Speaker 2>He used to teach in La so that perked my

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<v Speaker 2>ears of oh cool, like this teacher used to live

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<v Speaker 2>in La like, awesome, I love la.

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<v Speaker 1>Some kids thought mister Lyndrud was kind of cheesy, but

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<v Speaker 1>he always made class fun and he was only twenty

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<v Speaker 1>six years.

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<v Speaker 2>Old, and so I'm like, okay, he's not that much

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<v Speaker 2>older with us. He is kind of the young hip teacher.

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<v Speaker 1>Sephanies High School had a period in the mornings before

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<v Speaker 1>classes started called zero Hour.

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<v Speaker 2>If you needed to do homework or you needed extra help,

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<v Speaker 2>you could go in. At that point, I didn't really

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<v Speaker 2>want to be home at all, so I started going

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<v Speaker 2>to the zero hour.

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<v Speaker 1>One day, ring zero Hour, Stephanie was walking through the

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<v Speaker 1>hallways trying to find a place to do her homework.

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<v Speaker 2>I walked by mister Lyndrud's room and there was no

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<v Speaker 2>one in there, or maybe one or two people, and

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<v Speaker 2>I said, Okay, this looks like a safe place for

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<v Speaker 2>me to go to.

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<v Speaker 1>She stepped into his classroom.

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<v Speaker 2>His room felt safe because it was quiet. There wasn't arguing,

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<v Speaker 2>there weren't people yelling.

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<v Speaker 1>She sat down and did her homework. The next day

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<v Speaker 1>she came back to his classroom in the morning. Mister

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<v Speaker 1>Lyndrud was always welcoming.

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<v Speaker 2>It was just sometimes me and him, sometimes other people.

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<v Speaker 1>Soon she was going to mister Lyndrud's room during zero

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<v Speaker 1>hour most days. There she didn't have to worry about

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<v Speaker 1>the mean girls in her grade or her parents' arguments.

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<v Speaker 2>I'd had so many friends at different schools hurt me,

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<v Speaker 2>and I really didn't trust other students.

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<v Speaker 1>Mister Lyndrud was easy to talk to. He asked her

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<v Speaker 1>lots of questions and seemed genuinely interested in her life.

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<v Speaker 2>Where are you from? How long have you lived here?

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<v Speaker 2>And then he started opening up a little bit about

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<v Speaker 2>I came from Texas, I have an ex fiancee. He

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<v Speaker 2>trusted me with personal information, and it filled this void

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<v Speaker 2>that I wasn't feeling with friends or with my family.

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<v Speaker 2>He was really the only person who would sit down

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<v Speaker 2>and listen to me and hear me, and I just

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<v Speaker 2>didn't have anyone else like that in my life at

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<v Speaker 2>that time.

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<v Speaker 1>One day, Stephanie asked to use his computer for a

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<v Speaker 1>homework assignment.

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<v Speaker 2>And I'm on his computer and he had his Aol

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<v Speaker 2>instant Messenger up, and that, in a way almost added

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<v Speaker 2>to him being that cool, relatable teacher, because it's like, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>we're on instant Messenger as students, Oh you're on instant messenger,

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<v Speaker 2>that's cool.

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<v Speaker 1>A message popped up, I'm a woman named Amanda.

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<v Speaker 2>He's like, Oh, that's my friend Amanda from LA. Just

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<v Speaker 2>tell her you know you're student using my computer. And

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<v Speaker 2>then another one popped up and he's like, Oh, that's

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<v Speaker 2>my ex girlfriend. Just tell her I'm busy, or that

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<v Speaker 2>you're a student or whatever. I'm thinking. Oh, he trusts

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<v Speaker 2>me to respond to all these people in his life.

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<v Speaker 1>And Stephanie was starting to trust him too.

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<v Speaker 2>It became sort of a friendship and it started to

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<v Speaker 2>feel like a very safe place for me to be

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<v Speaker 2>in his room.

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<v Speaker 1>Eventually, mister Lyndrud told her that she could ditch the

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<v Speaker 1>formal way of addressing him, so he stopped being mister Lyndrude,

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<v Speaker 1>her Spanish teacher, and became Mark, her friend.

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<v Speaker 2>There was one day that I had left school and

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<v Speaker 2>I had a question about my Spanish homework, and because

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<v Speaker 2>I had been responding through his aim to people, obviously

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<v Speaker 2>I knew what his screen name was.

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<v Speaker 1>So she sent him a message on AIM asking how

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<v Speaker 1>to conjugate a verb in Spanish.

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<v Speaker 2>Mark responded, he was very professional and he explained it

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<v Speaker 2>to me and I apologize sorry reaching out to you

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<v Speaker 2>here I just wanted to make sure I got the

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<v Speaker 2>homework done and he said it's okay.

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<v Speaker 1>Soon, Stephanie started messaging Mark with homework questions more often.

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<v Speaker 1>He would help her, and then their messages move to

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<v Speaker 1>other topics.

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<v Speaker 2>He would say, what are you doing or what are

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<v Speaker 2>you up to? Or what are your plans this weekend.

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<v Speaker 2>He made me feel like I could just talk to

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<v Speaker 2>him about anything that was going on in my life

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<v Speaker 2>and that I could trust him. There was part of

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<v Speaker 2>me that kept thinking like, is this weird? Is this appropriate?

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<v Speaker 2>Like should we be having this conversation? But also he

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<v Speaker 2>is just being nice and friendly, and maybe he does

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<v Speaker 2>recognize that I just need a friend.

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<v Speaker 1>If he was offering friendship, she would take it, even

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<v Speaker 1>if it was a little unusual. Then one day, a

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<v Speaker 1>few weeks later, Mark suggested that they hang out outside

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<v Speaker 1>of school.

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<v Speaker 2>He asked me, is there a park by your house?

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<v Speaker 2>Is there anywhere we could meet? And I happened to

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<v Speaker 2>live across the street from this giant park.

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<v Speaker 1>He told her to meet him there on Friday night.

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<v Speaker 1>When Friday night came, Stephanie told her parents she was

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<v Speaker 1>meeting a friend and started walking to the park.

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<v Speaker 2>This is when I started to feel nervous, what are

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<v Speaker 2>we meeting at the park? For fifty percent of me

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<v Speaker 2>thought it was weird, but fifty percent of me also said, well,

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<v Speaker 2>this feels safe because he's meeting me in a very

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<v Speaker 2>public place. All my neighbors are there, a lot of

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<v Speaker 2>people from our school are going to be there, so

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<v Speaker 2>this must be okay because it's a very, very public park.

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<v Speaker 2>He made me feel like we were friends at that point,

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<v Speaker 2>and I really didn't have anyone else to hang out with,

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<v Speaker 2>especially on a Friday night.

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<v Speaker 1>When she got to the park, a green suv pulled

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<v Speaker 1>into the parking lot and Mark stepped out. He looked

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<v Speaker 1>different than he did at school.

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<v Speaker 2>He had a hat on, he has this very distinct

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<v Speaker 2>bald head, so I remember thinking, okay, that's kind of

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<v Speaker 2>a disguise, so maybe this isn't okay that we're meeting up,

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<v Speaker 2>and I started to feel really uneasy. He starts walking

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<v Speaker 2>toward me very aggressively, and he just picks me up

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<v Speaker 2>and kisses me, and I just froze. It never occurred

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<v Speaker 2>to me that that's what was going to happen.

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<v Speaker 1>As a fourteen year old, Stephanie was overwhelmed and confused.

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't know what to do. My brain couldn't process

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<v Speaker 2>what was happening.

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<v Speaker 1>Stephanie walked home from the park that night, desperately trying

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<v Speaker 1>to make sense of this. Mark was her teacher and

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<v Speaker 1>she thought he was her friend.

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<v Speaker 2>What just happened to risk being in this park, to

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<v Speaker 2>risk his teaching, And I'm like, he must really like

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<v Speaker 2>me to be willing to do that.

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<v Speaker 1>After that night, Mark began messaging Stephanie more and more,

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<v Speaker 1>and then he started driving over to her house and

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<v Speaker 1>parking his car outside on the street.

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<v Speaker 2>It would be later at night, and so I would

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<v Speaker 2>just go outside and sit in his car with him.

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<v Speaker 2>He would have me get in the backseat and make out,

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<v Speaker 2>and then I would have to go to school the

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<v Speaker 2>next week like nothing had ever happened.

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<v Speaker 1>It was disorienting.

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<v Speaker 2>He's coming over to make out with me. He's also

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<v Speaker 2>my teacher when I'm sitting his class, and nobody knows.

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<v Speaker 2>And it was a very very confusing spot to be in,

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<v Speaker 2>feeling uncomfortable, but just feeling like someone cared, that someone

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<v Speaker 2>cared about me enough to listen to me and want

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<v Speaker 2>to be around me.

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<v Speaker 1>Mark was grooming her. Grooming is a term used to

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<v Speaker 1>describe the process perpetrators use to control their victims. They

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<v Speaker 1>start by gaining their victims trust, then isolating them from

0:12:49.080 --> 0:12:52.960
<v Speaker 1>their community, labeling their own abuse as a shared secret,

0:12:53.400 --> 0:12:57.439
<v Speaker 1>and finally controlling and coercing their victim into staying silent.

0:12:57.920 --> 0:13:01.080
<v Speaker 2>He started telling me, you can never say word to anybody.

0:13:01.280 --> 0:13:04.000
<v Speaker 2>You can never say anything because it's my dream to

0:13:04.080 --> 0:13:07.480
<v Speaker 2>be a big football coach. And if you tell anyone,

0:13:07.600 --> 0:13:10.719
<v Speaker 2>my dream is ruined. My life is ruined. I will

0:13:10.760 --> 0:13:13.480
<v Speaker 2>be blacklisted in everything that I want to do if

0:13:13.520 --> 0:13:16.719
<v Speaker 2>you tell anyone. And what are people going to say

0:13:16.760 --> 0:13:19.200
<v Speaker 2>about you if they know this is happening.

0:13:20.720 --> 0:13:23.920
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie did what he asked. She didn't tell anyone.

0:13:24.880 --> 0:13:29.720
<v Speaker 2>I couldn't process what was actually happening, so.

0:13:29.640 --> 0:13:31.200
<v Speaker 1>Mark processed it for her.

0:13:31.720 --> 0:13:35.600
<v Speaker 2>He told her, now we've taken this relationship a little

0:13:35.640 --> 0:13:38.720
<v Speaker 2>bit of a step further, and we trust each other more.

0:13:38.800 --> 0:13:41.760
<v Speaker 2>To do this. In a weird way, I think this

0:13:41.960 --> 0:13:48.800
<v Speaker 2>secrecy made me feel like we had this special, trusting relationship.

0:13:49.760 --> 0:13:53.080
<v Speaker 1>But keeping the secret meant Mark quickly became the only

0:13:53.240 --> 0:13:56.360
<v Speaker 1>person she could talk to. She couldn't talk to anyone

0:13:56.400 --> 0:13:59.959
<v Speaker 1>else about what was really happening, so Mark became stephanie

0:14:00.160 --> 0:14:03.400
<v Speaker 1>closest connection and her only one.

0:14:03.679 --> 0:14:06.240
<v Speaker 2>I went into the school year isolated, and now I'm

0:14:06.480 --> 0:14:10.000
<v Speaker 2>even more isolated because I can't tell anyone what's going on.

0:14:10.120 --> 0:14:13.040
<v Speaker 2>I can't tell everyone who I'm hanging out with at night.

0:14:13.840 --> 0:14:18.480
<v Speaker 2>I was rewarded for my silence with attention, with the

0:14:18.520 --> 0:14:20.400
<v Speaker 2>attention that I wasn't getting anywhere else.

0:14:21.760 --> 0:14:25.480
<v Speaker 1>In early January, Stephanie went to Mark's house to watch

0:14:25.480 --> 0:14:29.960
<v Speaker 1>a football game. That was the first night he raped her.

0:14:30.600 --> 0:14:34.280
<v Speaker 2>I was just very confused. I think I froze. I

0:14:34.320 --> 0:14:39.720
<v Speaker 2>couldn't make sense of it happening. And then as soon

0:14:39.760 --> 0:14:42.960
<v Speaker 2>as he was done and was like getting dressed, he said,

0:14:44.080 --> 0:14:46.200
<v Speaker 2>I guess this makes you my girlfriend now.

0:14:48.640 --> 0:14:53.160
<v Speaker 1>Every time Stephanie was uncomfortable or confused or frozen, Mark

0:14:53.240 --> 0:14:57.120
<v Speaker 1>jumped in to explain her own feelings to her. He

0:14:57.160 --> 0:14:59.920
<v Speaker 1>told her, this is what trust felt like.

0:15:00.880 --> 0:15:03.360
<v Speaker 2>Maybe he does really care about me and love me

0:15:03.960 --> 0:15:08.560
<v Speaker 2>because he was risking everything and he was risking that

0:15:09.160 --> 0:15:09.600
<v Speaker 2>for me.

0:15:11.560 --> 0:15:13.920
<v Speaker 1>Mark told Stephanie he was in love with her.

0:15:14.680 --> 0:15:19.280
<v Speaker 2>He made it seem like it was an actual relationship.

0:15:19.880 --> 0:15:23.400
<v Speaker 2>For Valentine's Day, he took me to the drive in

0:15:23.680 --> 0:15:26.080
<v Speaker 2>and we saw how to lose a guy in ten days,

0:15:26.280 --> 0:15:27.160
<v Speaker 2>I'll never forget.

0:15:28.200 --> 0:15:31.600
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie saved the ticket stub. She put it in a

0:15:31.680 --> 0:15:36.960
<v Speaker 1>box with other mementos from her time with Mark. Mark

0:15:37.040 --> 0:15:40.680
<v Speaker 1>started inviting Stephanie over to his house. She told her

0:15:40.720 --> 0:15:43.480
<v Speaker 1>parents she was at a friend's and when she was

0:15:43.520 --> 0:15:46.200
<v Speaker 1>over at Mark's house, he told her it was only

0:15:46.320 --> 0:15:48.800
<v Speaker 1>fair for her to pitch in with household chores.

0:15:49.640 --> 0:15:54.360
<v Speaker 2>It wasn't uncommon for me to clean his house. In fact,

0:15:54.360 --> 0:15:57.040
<v Speaker 2>it was an expectation. He would have me fold his

0:15:57.200 --> 0:15:59.080
<v Speaker 2>shirts a very specific way.

0:16:00.000 --> 0:16:02.360
<v Speaker 1>Explained to Stephanie that this is what being in a

0:16:02.440 --> 0:16:05.160
<v Speaker 1>relationship was like. She believed him.

0:16:06.320 --> 0:16:09.960
<v Speaker 2>As he was getting closer to me and making me

0:16:10.000 --> 0:16:13.840
<v Speaker 2>feel special, he started somewhat flirting with this other girl

0:16:13.880 --> 0:16:16.920
<v Speaker 2>that I was friends with, and I started to feel

0:16:17.040 --> 0:16:19.800
<v Speaker 2>jealous because I'm like, oh, I'm losing his attention.

0:16:20.880 --> 0:16:24.640
<v Speaker 1>One day, that girl mentioned something about Coach, which is

0:16:24.680 --> 0:16:28.080
<v Speaker 1>what a lot of students called Mark. Hearing her talk

0:16:28.120 --> 0:16:31.960
<v Speaker 1>about Mark, Stephanie couldn't keep their secret in any longer.

0:16:32.720 --> 0:16:35.120
<v Speaker 2>I just snapped and I was like, Coach is the

0:16:35.120 --> 0:16:38.680
<v Speaker 2>one who's been texting me. We're like hanging out, and

0:16:38.720 --> 0:16:40.200
<v Speaker 2>she just went silent.

0:16:42.360 --> 0:16:44.800
<v Speaker 1>A few days later, Stephanie was at school when she

0:16:44.880 --> 0:16:46.760
<v Speaker 1>was asked to see the guidance counselor.

0:16:47.760 --> 0:16:52.600
<v Speaker 2>He looked at me and he said, are you having

0:16:52.720 --> 0:16:59.280
<v Speaker 2>a relationship with mister Lyndrud? And I said no. I

0:16:59.360 --> 0:17:02.880
<v Speaker 2>denied it because he had put the fear of God

0:17:03.000 --> 0:17:06.080
<v Speaker 2>in me that if I told anyone my life was over,

0:17:06.160 --> 0:17:08.760
<v Speaker 2>let alone my life his life. So of course I

0:17:08.840 --> 0:17:11.200
<v Speaker 2>was going to be silent because I didn't want to

0:17:11.200 --> 0:17:26.280
<v Speaker 2>be the person who crushed his dreams and ruined his life.

0:17:36.400 --> 0:17:39.120
<v Speaker 1>After Stephanie told a classmate that she was hanging out

0:17:39.119 --> 0:17:42.800
<v Speaker 1>with their Spanish teacher, the guidance counselor called Stephanie into

0:17:42.800 --> 0:17:46.760
<v Speaker 1>his office. He asked her if anything inappropriate was going

0:17:46.800 --> 0:17:49.959
<v Speaker 1>on with mister Lyndrud. Stephanie denied it.

0:17:50.440 --> 0:17:53.080
<v Speaker 2>Of course I was going to be silent because I

0:17:53.119 --> 0:17:56.040
<v Speaker 2>didn't want to be the person who crushed his dreams

0:17:56.040 --> 0:17:57.040
<v Speaker 2>and ruined his life.

0:17:57.800 --> 0:18:01.200
<v Speaker 1>School administrators questioned Lyndrud as well.

0:18:01.800 --> 0:18:04.960
<v Speaker 2>He said nothing happened. The school was like, well, they say,

0:18:04.960 --> 0:18:08.760
<v Speaker 2>nothing's going on and they didn't do any investigation. There's

0:18:08.880 --> 0:18:09.600
<v Speaker 2>nothing further.

0:18:10.560 --> 0:18:14.440
<v Speaker 1>But rumors had already started spreading through the school. As

0:18:14.440 --> 0:18:17.920
<v Speaker 1>a heads up. These comments are cruel and hard to hear.

0:18:18.800 --> 0:18:22.480
<v Speaker 2>People were calling me teacher fucker, and people were like, oh,

0:18:22.520 --> 0:18:26.399
<v Speaker 2>I saw her under his desk, and that just further

0:18:27.080 --> 0:18:31.600
<v Speaker 2>isolated me more and more. I already didn't have friends,

0:18:31.640 --> 0:18:34.320
<v Speaker 2>and now I'm being labeled a slut a whore.

0:18:35.320 --> 0:18:38.359
<v Speaker 1>She was shamed. The few people she was friendly with

0:18:38.440 --> 0:18:42.440
<v Speaker 1>at school started avoiding eye contact when she walked down

0:18:42.480 --> 0:18:45.199
<v Speaker 1>the hallway. She could hear the girls in her grade

0:18:45.240 --> 0:18:49.359
<v Speaker 1>whispering about her as she passed. One day, someone said

0:18:49.400 --> 0:18:52.880
<v Speaker 1>something really horrible straight to her face, and.

0:18:52.800 --> 0:18:55.399
<v Speaker 2>The principal was in the hallway, and I went up

0:18:55.400 --> 0:18:58.800
<v Speaker 2>to him, sobbing, and I said, I'm the student that

0:18:58.840 --> 0:19:01.959
<v Speaker 2>these rumors are about. Make it stop, Please make it stop.

0:19:02.520 --> 0:19:06.240
<v Speaker 2>And he said, well, I can't just get on the

0:19:06.240 --> 0:19:12.719
<v Speaker 2>loud speaker and tell everyone that it's not true.

0:19:12.880 --> 0:19:15.520
<v Speaker 1>I want to pause here for a moment. When I

0:19:15.560 --> 0:19:18.440
<v Speaker 1>heard this part of Stephanie's story, I was shocked by

0:19:18.480 --> 0:19:21.240
<v Speaker 1>how many adults knew what was going on and didn't

0:19:21.280 --> 0:19:24.919
<v Speaker 1>do anything about it. I think about how alone she

0:19:25.040 --> 0:19:29.439
<v Speaker 1>must have felt. Stephanie was trying to protect Mark, but

0:19:29.520 --> 0:19:33.919
<v Speaker 1>nobody was protecting her. Now, the idea of telling the

0:19:33.960 --> 0:19:36.560
<v Speaker 1>truth felt even more impossible.

0:19:37.560 --> 0:19:42.240
<v Speaker 2>I was just in so much pain and withdrawal from

0:19:42.280 --> 0:19:46.639
<v Speaker 2>everything because the worst possible thing was happening to me.

0:19:47.480 --> 0:19:50.400
<v Speaker 1>And through it all, the only person she could talk

0:19:50.400 --> 0:19:52.000
<v Speaker 1>about this with was Mark.

0:19:53.359 --> 0:19:58.960
<v Speaker 2>That brought me closer to him because I didn't have anybody,

0:19:59.119 --> 0:20:02.240
<v Speaker 2>so the rus, the hurt made me turn to him.

0:20:02.840 --> 0:20:06.359
<v Speaker 1>For her entire freshman year, Mark was the only person

0:20:06.440 --> 0:20:10.000
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie really felt was in her corner. Then at the

0:20:10.160 --> 0:20:13.600
<v Speaker 1>end of the school year, Mark took a job teaching elsewhere.

0:20:14.400 --> 0:20:17.439
<v Speaker 2>I think he got spooked and he left, But.

0:20:17.520 --> 0:20:26.440
<v Speaker 1>Leaving wasn't an option for Stephanie. That summer, Mark introduced

0:20:26.440 --> 0:20:27.680
<v Speaker 1>her to his parents.

0:20:28.280 --> 0:20:31.600
<v Speaker 2>He lied to them and said I was nineteen. I

0:20:31.640 --> 0:20:35.359
<v Speaker 2>was fifteen. But it made me feel so mature and

0:20:35.400 --> 0:20:38.320
<v Speaker 2>so much older, and that's what everyone when you're a

0:20:38.359 --> 0:20:39.560
<v Speaker 2>teenager wants to feel.

0:20:40.200 --> 0:20:42.199
<v Speaker 1>Mark's parents welcome Stephanie in.

0:20:43.000 --> 0:20:45.800
<v Speaker 2>They would have me over for dinner, and his mom

0:20:45.880 --> 0:20:48.560
<v Speaker 2>was giving me books to read. His mom was giving

0:20:48.600 --> 0:20:51.640
<v Speaker 2>us restaurant recommendations. They're like, oh, next time before you guys,

0:20:51.680 --> 0:20:52.800
<v Speaker 2>go to the drive and you should go to this

0:20:52.840 --> 0:20:55.119
<v Speaker 2>pizza place and get the calzone.

0:20:55.160 --> 0:20:57.720
<v Speaker 1>Mark and Stephanie spent nearly every day together.

0:20:58.320 --> 0:21:00.359
<v Speaker 2>We went to the beach, and I have those of

0:21:00.400 --> 0:21:03.400
<v Speaker 2>us at the beach together. Having him act that way,

0:21:03.440 --> 0:21:06.600
<v Speaker 2>it was like, Okay, this is real, this is a relationship.

0:21:07.200 --> 0:21:09.760
<v Speaker 2>I had nothing to compare it to, but it felt real.

0:21:10.600 --> 0:21:14.080
<v Speaker 1>Mark told everyone they met that Stephanie was nineteen, and

0:21:14.119 --> 0:21:16.800
<v Speaker 1>he asked her to lie about her age. If people asked,

0:21:17.520 --> 0:21:19.359
<v Speaker 1>he said age was just a number.

0:21:20.040 --> 0:21:23.879
<v Speaker 2>At some point, I really started to believe that I

0:21:23.960 --> 0:21:27.439
<v Speaker 2>was older. That's how much he had me lying to

0:21:27.520 --> 0:21:31.520
<v Speaker 2>people that I truly, in some weird way, was like,

0:21:31.600 --> 0:21:32.640
<v Speaker 2>oh no, I'm nineteen.

0:21:34.520 --> 0:21:38.160
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie got a fake ID for Mark's birthday that year.

0:21:38.280 --> 0:21:40.000
<v Speaker 1>They went out to a bar to celebrate.

0:21:40.920 --> 0:21:43.400
<v Speaker 2>We went to those New Orleans themed bar and if

0:21:43.440 --> 0:21:48.280
<v Speaker 2>you flash your breasts you get beads. And the whole

0:21:48.320 --> 0:21:51.480
<v Speaker 2>time we were there, he just kept encouraging me to flash,

0:21:51.600 --> 0:21:57.040
<v Speaker 2>the bartenders, to get more drinks, just sexualizing me. This

0:21:57.080 --> 0:21:58.879
<v Speaker 2>whole entire bar saw me topless.

0:21:59.480 --> 0:22:02.439
<v Speaker 1>For those two years, Mark had been her gateway to

0:22:02.480 --> 0:22:03.560
<v Speaker 1>the rest of the world.

0:22:04.240 --> 0:22:06.760
<v Speaker 2>I couldn't drive, I couldn't go anywhere. If I wanted

0:22:06.760 --> 0:22:08.800
<v Speaker 2>to do anything, he would pick me up. He would

0:22:08.880 --> 0:22:13.600
<v Speaker 2>drive me I had to be completely completely dependent on him.

0:22:13.640 --> 0:22:17.240
<v Speaker 1>Relying on Mark was beginning to feel suffocating. A few

0:22:17.280 --> 0:22:21.000
<v Speaker 1>weeks after his birthday, Stephanie's sister came to town.

0:22:21.359 --> 0:22:23.840
<v Speaker 2>So I went out with my big sister and her friends,

0:22:23.920 --> 0:22:27.600
<v Speaker 2>and I was feeling so much freer because I did

0:22:27.640 --> 0:22:32.399
<v Speaker 2>not have to depend on him for attention or something

0:22:32.480 --> 0:22:32.840
<v Speaker 2>to do.

0:22:33.960 --> 0:22:39.159
<v Speaker 1>That year, Stephanie turned sixteen and got her driver's license, and.

0:22:39.560 --> 0:22:43.879
<v Speaker 2>That is definitely where things started to change for me. Gradually,

0:22:44.600 --> 0:22:47.960
<v Speaker 2>I started being able to go outside his bubble a

0:22:47.960 --> 0:22:53.640
<v Speaker 2>lot more. I'm seeing healthy relationships. My world opened up

0:22:54.040 --> 0:23:00.800
<v Speaker 2>to so much because I had been so sheltered by him.

0:23:01.040 --> 0:23:03.480
<v Speaker 1>She was still going over to Mark's house a lot,

0:23:03.760 --> 0:23:06.159
<v Speaker 1>and he was still asking her to clean up and

0:23:06.200 --> 0:23:09.280
<v Speaker 1>do laundry for him. One day, she was at his

0:23:09.359 --> 0:23:10.399
<v Speaker 1>house by herself.

0:23:11.400 --> 0:23:14.440
<v Speaker 2>I just remember there being a lot of papers everywhere,

0:23:14.640 --> 0:23:16.639
<v Speaker 2>and I'm like, I need to organize this. I can't

0:23:16.680 --> 0:23:18.200
<v Speaker 2>stare at these papers anymore.

0:23:19.080 --> 0:23:21.880
<v Speaker 1>She went to put them in a filing cabinet. That's

0:23:21.880 --> 0:23:23.880
<v Speaker 1>when a document caught her eye.

0:23:24.840 --> 0:23:28.920
<v Speaker 2>And that's when I found his birth certificate. I pulled

0:23:28.960 --> 0:23:31.840
<v Speaker 2>it out and I looked at it, and I'm not

0:23:31.880 --> 0:23:33.800
<v Speaker 2>good at math, but I'm doing the math in my head.

0:23:33.840 --> 0:23:35.800
<v Speaker 2>When I'm sitting there as a sixteen year old, I'm like,

0:23:36.280 --> 0:23:38.760
<v Speaker 2>holy shit, he's thirty two.

0:23:40.000 --> 0:23:43.600
<v Speaker 1>Mark had told her he was twenty eight, four years

0:23:43.640 --> 0:23:47.640
<v Speaker 1>younger than he actually was. As she stood there staring

0:23:47.680 --> 0:23:52.560
<v Speaker 1>at his birth certificate, she had a moment of clarity.

0:23:52.600 --> 0:23:55.919
<v Speaker 2>Clearly, you know you're doing something wrong if you're lying

0:23:56.119 --> 0:23:59.400
<v Speaker 2>to tell me that you're younger. And that's when everything

0:23:59.520 --> 0:24:04.280
<v Speaker 2>started clicking for me. Of he's twice my age. This

0:24:04.400 --> 0:24:05.000
<v Speaker 2>isn't right.

0:24:06.640 --> 0:24:09.280
<v Speaker 1>When Mark came home, Stephanie confronted him.

0:24:10.520 --> 0:24:13.199
<v Speaker 2>I said, I found your birth certificate, so I know

0:24:13.240 --> 0:24:18.040
<v Speaker 2>you're thirty two, and his response was well, I was

0:24:18.119 --> 0:24:21.320
<v Speaker 2>already feeling like Chester the molester. I didn't want to

0:24:21.320 --> 0:24:21.960
<v Speaker 2>make it worse.

0:24:24.000 --> 0:24:26.119
<v Speaker 1>Stephanique laired at him, disgusted.

0:24:26.880 --> 0:24:30.160
<v Speaker 2>What the hell's wrong with you? You were thirty when

0:24:30.160 --> 0:24:33.080
<v Speaker 2>you met a fourteen year old. You want me to

0:24:33.119 --> 0:24:36.160
<v Speaker 2>trust you with everything, and I don't even know how

0:24:36.200 --> 0:24:39.320
<v Speaker 2>old you really are. I want to be on a break.

0:24:41.000 --> 0:24:42.200
<v Speaker 1>Mark's face dropped.

0:24:42.760 --> 0:24:44.840
<v Speaker 2>What I said, yeah, we're on a break.

0:24:45.560 --> 0:24:48.959
<v Speaker 1>Something between them had shifted. Mark could sense it too.

0:24:49.880 --> 0:24:50.960
<v Speaker 1>He looked scared.

0:24:51.800 --> 0:24:54.000
<v Speaker 2>I think that he realized he was losing control of me,

0:24:54.760 --> 0:24:58.840
<v Speaker 2>and he spiraled. He said, I'm going to marry you.

0:25:00.359 --> 0:25:02.080
<v Speaker 2>I'm looking for rings.

0:25:02.280 --> 0:25:04.480
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie almost laughed at him.

0:25:04.840 --> 0:25:07.560
<v Speaker 2>I am sixteen years old and a thirty two year

0:25:07.600 --> 0:25:10.119
<v Speaker 2>old man is asking me to marry him.

0:25:10.480 --> 0:25:14.600
<v Speaker 1>She left his house. Mark called and texted her NonStop,

0:25:14.760 --> 0:25:16.320
<v Speaker 1>begging her not to walk away.

0:25:16.920 --> 0:25:19.200
<v Speaker 2>He wanted to talk, he wanted to try to work

0:25:19.280 --> 0:25:23.120
<v Speaker 2>things out. And I went to his house and I said,

0:25:23.160 --> 0:25:26.600
<v Speaker 2>we're done. This is gross. I can't believe what you've

0:25:26.600 --> 0:25:29.639
<v Speaker 2>done to me. He just starts crying and then he's like,

0:25:29.960 --> 0:25:32.320
<v Speaker 2>please don't leave, stay with me. And I looked at

0:25:32.359 --> 0:25:35.040
<v Speaker 2>him and I said, you are pathetic. This has been

0:25:35.040 --> 0:25:37.719
<v Speaker 2>going on for two years. Do you even realize what

0:25:37.760 --> 0:25:41.080
<v Speaker 2>you've done to me. I took my power back as

0:25:41.080 --> 0:25:44.160
<v Speaker 2>a sixteen year old in that moment, even though at

0:25:44.160 --> 0:25:46.719
<v Speaker 2>that point to me it was just me breaking up

0:25:46.720 --> 0:25:47.400
<v Speaker 2>with a boyfriend.

0:25:48.520 --> 0:25:51.640
<v Speaker 1>It would take over a decade for her to see

0:25:51.640 --> 0:25:56.840
<v Speaker 1>the situation for what it really was. No matter how

0:25:56.880 --> 0:25:59.920
<v Speaker 1>hard Mark tried to regain control.

0:25:59.680 --> 0:26:03.880
<v Speaker 2>He I just started distancing myself more and more from

0:26:03.960 --> 0:26:06.960
<v Speaker 2>him because I knew that I was going to be okay.

0:26:07.840 --> 0:26:11.199
<v Speaker 1>She graduated early and finally left her high school behind.

0:26:12.080 --> 0:26:15.280
<v Speaker 1>In the fall. She started college at the University of Arizona,

0:26:15.840 --> 0:26:18.119
<v Speaker 1>but her time at college was challenging.

0:26:19.040 --> 0:26:21.400
<v Speaker 2>I was way into the party scene and I would

0:26:21.480 --> 0:26:23.760
<v Speaker 2>not go to class. I would just drink, and my

0:26:23.840 --> 0:26:27.400
<v Speaker 2>life really really spiraled from there. I was just drinking

0:26:27.640 --> 0:26:30.359
<v Speaker 2>so much and I ended up dropping out of you

0:26:30.480 --> 0:26:30.720
<v Speaker 2>of a.

0:26:31.920 --> 0:26:35.600
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie never told her parents about Mark's abuse. She didn't

0:26:35.640 --> 0:26:38.560
<v Speaker 1>have the words for it. There was so much pain

0:26:38.800 --> 0:26:41.840
<v Speaker 1>just under the surface, but she didn't want to feel it.

0:26:42.640 --> 0:26:46.080
<v Speaker 2>I was just stuck in this depressive, drunk cycle.

0:26:46.760 --> 0:26:50.200
<v Speaker 1>What happened with Mark followed her wherever she went.

0:26:51.400 --> 0:26:56.520
<v Speaker 2>I was just hiding that pain constantly, never making sense

0:26:56.520 --> 0:26:58.439
<v Speaker 2>of what I had been through, just masking it and

0:26:58.480 --> 0:27:00.159
<v Speaker 2>masking it and masking it.

0:27:00.280 --> 0:27:02.480
<v Speaker 1>Until one night I went out.

0:27:02.240 --> 0:27:06.439
<v Speaker 2>And got extremely intoxicated and got behind the wheel of

0:27:06.440 --> 0:27:10.000
<v Speaker 2>my car and thank god, I was pulled over and

0:27:10.080 --> 0:27:13.480
<v Speaker 2>I blew a point two four and I got a DUI.

0:27:14.400 --> 0:27:16.680
<v Speaker 2>I was relieved. This is what needed to happen. This

0:27:16.760 --> 0:27:17.840
<v Speaker 2>cycle is going to break.

0:27:18.880 --> 0:27:21.480
<v Speaker 1>She knew that she couldn't keep masking her pain.

0:27:23.160 --> 0:27:25.560
<v Speaker 2>I had to start facing it, and I hadn't faced

0:27:25.560 --> 0:27:26.200
<v Speaker 2>it until then.

0:27:27.040 --> 0:27:29.959
<v Speaker 1>She tried to tell a few friends about Mark. She

0:27:30.000 --> 0:27:33.359
<v Speaker 1>still didn't have the words to label the experience. She

0:27:33.480 --> 0:27:37.000
<v Speaker 1>told people she had dated one of her teachers. People

0:27:37.040 --> 0:27:38.200
<v Speaker 1>didn't know what to make of it.

0:27:38.960 --> 0:27:42.000
<v Speaker 2>So many people were so dismissive of it and minimized it.

0:27:42.280 --> 0:27:44.960
<v Speaker 2>There were never any follow up questions. Not a single

0:27:44.960 --> 0:27:47.840
<v Speaker 2>person ever told me that was wrong or made it

0:27:47.880 --> 0:27:50.520
<v Speaker 2>seem like it was something I should have reported. I

0:27:50.560 --> 0:27:53.960
<v Speaker 2>was like, Okay, maybe I'm crazy, Maybe maybe I did

0:27:53.960 --> 0:27:54.560
<v Speaker 2>something wrong.

0:27:55.480 --> 0:27:58.399
<v Speaker 1>It had been over ten years since she had seen Mark,

0:27:59.040 --> 0:28:02.320
<v Speaker 1>and she learned that he wasn't teaching anymore. He'd joined

0:28:02.320 --> 0:28:05.479
<v Speaker 1>the military. So she kept the truth about what happened

0:28:05.520 --> 0:28:10.159
<v Speaker 1>to herself and she focused on moving forward. She enrolled

0:28:10.200 --> 0:28:13.360
<v Speaker 1>in school again. In her late twenties, she became pregnant

0:28:13.400 --> 0:28:16.760
<v Speaker 1>after a brief relationship. She decided to keep the baby

0:28:16.800 --> 0:28:19.840
<v Speaker 1>and be a single mom. When her son was born,

0:28:20.160 --> 0:28:23.919
<v Speaker 1>he became the center of Stephanie's world. She created a

0:28:23.960 --> 0:28:26.520
<v Speaker 1>loving home for him and filled their days with joy

0:28:26.560 --> 0:28:31.359
<v Speaker 1>and fun. She cherished their daily routines together. Being a

0:28:31.400 --> 0:28:34.440
<v Speaker 1>mom gave her the confidence to make a decision she'd

0:28:34.480 --> 0:28:35.600
<v Speaker 1>always wanted to make.

0:28:36.400 --> 0:28:39.240
<v Speaker 2>We're moving to La. I'm going as a single mom

0:28:39.880 --> 0:28:41.400
<v Speaker 2>with a two year old in tow I don't know

0:28:41.440 --> 0:28:45.040
<v Speaker 2>anybody there, but I just saw an opportunity to just

0:28:45.080 --> 0:28:47.040
<v Speaker 2>completely start over and go to La.

0:28:47.720 --> 0:28:50.760
<v Speaker 1>La was just as exciting as she always thought.

0:28:50.800 --> 0:28:53.440
<v Speaker 2>It would be my first job there was one of

0:28:53.440 --> 0:28:55.760
<v Speaker 2>my dream jobs. I was working for a celebrity, and

0:28:55.800 --> 0:28:58.400
<v Speaker 2>I thought that was amazing for the first.

0:28:58.160 --> 0:29:00.960
<v Speaker 1>Time in a long time, and he felt connected to

0:29:01.000 --> 0:29:04.320
<v Speaker 1>the younger version of herself, the little girl who dreamt

0:29:04.320 --> 0:29:07.600
<v Speaker 1>of building a new life in California. She got a

0:29:07.600 --> 0:29:11.480
<v Speaker 1>master's degree in communications and began a career in marketing

0:29:11.520 --> 0:29:12.280
<v Speaker 1>and pr.

0:29:12.960 --> 0:29:15.920
<v Speaker 2>That really built my confidence a lot. And everything that

0:29:15.920 --> 0:29:17.960
<v Speaker 2>I kept doing just kept bringing me more and more

0:29:18.000 --> 0:29:20.360
<v Speaker 2>comfortable myself, giving me more and more perspective.

0:29:21.120 --> 0:29:24.680
<v Speaker 1>On occasion, she would hike after work. She loved climbing

0:29:24.760 --> 0:29:28.920
<v Speaker 1>the hills dotted with chaparral and sage scrub. Her favorite

0:29:28.920 --> 0:29:32.120
<v Speaker 1>trail led to the Hollywood sign You.

0:29:32.040 --> 0:29:34.240
<v Speaker 2>Look out and you see all of La. I was

0:29:34.280 --> 0:29:37.600
<v Speaker 2>starting to feel a shift in myself of feeling stronger

0:29:37.640 --> 0:29:39.720
<v Speaker 2>and feeling like I can do things that I didn't

0:29:39.720 --> 0:29:42.640
<v Speaker 2>think that I could, and it started to really click

0:29:42.840 --> 0:29:45.840
<v Speaker 2>for me. That I can handle things and that I

0:29:45.880 --> 0:29:47.280
<v Speaker 2>can make things happen.

0:29:49.840 --> 0:29:52.400
<v Speaker 1>She had found the strength to face the hardest parts

0:29:52.400 --> 0:29:56.160
<v Speaker 1>of her life, raising her son, moving across the country,

0:29:56.440 --> 0:29:59.440
<v Speaker 1>and going back to school. She had reclaimed the different

0:29:59.440 --> 0:30:02.479
<v Speaker 1>pieces of her her identity one by one, and she

0:30:02.600 --> 0:30:08.120
<v Speaker 1>recognized herself again. Then Stephanie turned thirty, the same age

0:30:08.160 --> 0:30:10.479
<v Speaker 1>as Mark had been when she first stepped into his

0:30:10.480 --> 0:30:14.760
<v Speaker 1>classroom at age fourteen. That birthday brought a sense of

0:30:14.800 --> 0:30:18.840
<v Speaker 1>clarity and conviction. What Mark had done was deeply wrong

0:30:19.760 --> 0:30:21.400
<v Speaker 1>and it wasn't her fault.

0:30:21.760 --> 0:30:26.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm feeling ready to do something about this. One night,

0:30:27.160 --> 0:30:31.760
<v Speaker 2>I went online and I looked up Mark and said

0:30:31.800 --> 0:30:34.600
<v Speaker 2>he was teaching at a school in Colorado.

0:30:35.560 --> 0:30:38.600
<v Speaker 1>The last she heard Mark was in the military, but

0:30:38.760 --> 0:30:42.520
<v Speaker 1>now she was staring at his LinkedIn profile. He was

0:30:42.600 --> 0:30:44.760
<v Speaker 1>back teaching high school students.

0:30:45.200 --> 0:30:48.400
<v Speaker 2>My hand started shaking, and I'm like, holy shit, he's

0:30:48.440 --> 0:30:51.400
<v Speaker 2>around kids again. He's teaching again. What do I do.

0:30:52.480 --> 0:30:55.800
<v Speaker 1>That's when she was overcome by a new feeling rage.

0:30:56.600 --> 0:30:59.600
<v Speaker 2>So many people didn't show up for me. I can't

0:30:59.760 --> 0:31:02.600
<v Speaker 2>be that person if he is doing this to anybody else,

0:31:03.080 --> 0:31:06.560
<v Speaker 2>I cannot let this happen and just stand by and

0:31:06.600 --> 0:31:07.160
<v Speaker 2>do nothing.

0:31:08.080 --> 0:31:10.360
<v Speaker 1>So that same night, she sent an email to the

0:31:10.400 --> 0:31:12.840
<v Speaker 1>principal of the school where Mark was now teaching.

0:31:13.520 --> 0:31:16.880
<v Speaker 2>I just said, you don't know me. I saw online

0:31:17.000 --> 0:31:19.280
<v Speaker 2>that Mark Lyndrew may be a teacher at your school.

0:31:19.760 --> 0:31:23.400
<v Speaker 2>I was a student. I had an inappropriate sexual relationship

0:31:23.440 --> 0:31:25.800
<v Speaker 2>with him as a fourteen year old student. I just

0:31:25.800 --> 0:31:26.560
<v Speaker 2>wanted to let you know.

0:31:27.240 --> 0:31:29.600
<v Speaker 1>The principal responded to her email.

0:31:29.920 --> 0:31:34.000
<v Speaker 2>And he said, thank you for letting me know. Did

0:31:34.000 --> 0:31:37.840
<v Speaker 2>you ever report this? And I said no, but I

0:31:37.880 --> 0:31:38.720
<v Speaker 2>think I'm ready to.

0:31:41.200 --> 0:31:44.320
<v Speaker 1>The principal called the local police department and reported what

0:31:44.360 --> 0:31:45.800
<v Speaker 1>Mark had done to Stephanie.

0:31:46.360 --> 0:31:50.760
<v Speaker 2>That was the first time someone took my claim seriously.

0:31:52.200 --> 0:31:55.280
<v Speaker 1>A detective reached out to Stephanie. They got on the

0:31:55.280 --> 0:31:58.760
<v Speaker 1>phone and Detective Durban asked her to start from the beginning.

0:32:00.080 --> 0:32:03.040
<v Speaker 2>It was like, okay, he performed oral sex on me,

0:32:03.280 --> 0:32:06.840
<v Speaker 2>and she would say, okay, what does that mean. It's

0:32:06.880 --> 0:32:08.920
<v Speaker 2>going to be uncomfortable, but I need you to tell

0:32:08.920 --> 0:32:12.000
<v Speaker 2>me these things. I had to go into very explicit

0:32:12.040 --> 0:32:15.640
<v Speaker 2>detail about things that he would do to me. I

0:32:15.760 --> 0:32:18.400
<v Speaker 2>had to tell them every time that I could remember

0:32:18.560 --> 0:32:20.280
<v Speaker 2>any sort of a detail, because that was going to

0:32:20.280 --> 0:32:20.920
<v Speaker 2>be a charge.

0:32:21.720 --> 0:32:25.320
<v Speaker 1>Detective Durban began making note of the charges against Mark.

0:32:26.200 --> 0:32:29.360
<v Speaker 2>She started saying, sexual abuse of a minor. Okay, that's

0:32:29.360 --> 0:32:33.160
<v Speaker 2>an offense, that's sexual assault. When I started talking to

0:32:33.320 --> 0:32:36.560
<v Speaker 2>Detective Durban and she started using those words, I was like,

0:32:37.280 --> 0:32:39.640
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, that's exactly what this was. This was

0:32:39.720 --> 0:32:44.280
<v Speaker 2>never a relationship. He saw me vulnerable, he saw me isolated,

0:32:44.480 --> 0:32:48.840
<v Speaker 2>and that made me perfect prey for a pedophile.

0:33:10.400 --> 0:33:13.600
<v Speaker 1>For years, Stephanie knew that what she endured in high

0:33:13.640 --> 0:33:16.320
<v Speaker 1>school was wrong, but she never knew how to talk

0:33:16.360 --> 0:33:19.360
<v Speaker 1>about it. When she turned thirty, she was ready to

0:33:19.400 --> 0:33:22.040
<v Speaker 1>report what happened to her and was connected with the

0:33:22.080 --> 0:33:26.600
<v Speaker 1>detective named Detective Durbin. Stephanie told her what happened, and

0:33:26.640 --> 0:33:29.680
<v Speaker 1>the detective started making note of the charges against Mark.

0:33:30.560 --> 0:33:33.480
<v Speaker 2>She started saying, sexual abuse of a minor. Okay, that's

0:33:33.520 --> 0:33:37.840
<v Speaker 2>an offense, that's sexual assault. When Detective Durbin started using

0:33:37.840 --> 0:33:41.200
<v Speaker 2>those words, I was like, Oh my god, that's exactly

0:33:41.240 --> 0:33:43.640
<v Speaker 2>what this was. This was never a relationship. This was

0:33:44.280 --> 0:33:49.200
<v Speaker 2>a pedophile growing me and manipulating me, and it was abuse.

0:33:49.880 --> 0:33:53.000
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie was angrier than she had ever been, and she

0:33:53.120 --> 0:33:56.040
<v Speaker 1>was ready to do whatever was necessary to keep Mark

0:33:56.080 --> 0:34:02.040
<v Speaker 1>from abusing another child. Detective Durban asked Stephanie if she

0:34:02.080 --> 0:34:05.640
<v Speaker 1>had any other evidence that could corroborate her claims against Mark.

0:34:06.480 --> 0:34:09.640
<v Speaker 1>She didn't expect Stephanie to have much. It had been

0:34:09.680 --> 0:34:10.560
<v Speaker 1>over a decade.

0:34:11.360 --> 0:34:13.560
<v Speaker 2>Clearly, we know that I was being sexually abused the

0:34:13.680 --> 0:34:17.280
<v Speaker 2>entire time, but in my fourteen and fifteen year old mind,

0:34:17.800 --> 0:34:20.600
<v Speaker 2>it was a relationship. And what do you do as

0:34:20.600 --> 0:34:22.480
<v Speaker 2>a fourteen fifteen year old girl and you're in a relationship.

0:34:22.520 --> 0:34:27.360
<v Speaker 2>You keep little mementos. So I saved like movie tickets,

0:34:27.520 --> 0:34:31.839
<v Speaker 2>drive in tickets, receipts from lingerie he'd make me buy,

0:34:32.480 --> 0:34:37.279
<v Speaker 2>and photos. And that was perfect for the criminal investigation

0:34:37.400 --> 0:34:37.960
<v Speaker 2>and the trial.

0:34:38.840 --> 0:34:42.120
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie dug up that old box. All the things that

0:34:42.200 --> 0:34:45.000
<v Speaker 1>Mark had used to gain power over her were now

0:34:45.040 --> 0:34:48.239
<v Speaker 1>going to help her take it back. She brought the

0:34:48.320 --> 0:34:51.360
<v Speaker 1>evidence to the police and they put together a timeline

0:34:51.400 --> 0:34:56.120
<v Speaker 1>of Mark's abuse, corroborated by ticket stubs, receipts, and photos.

0:34:56.600 --> 0:34:59.080
<v Speaker 2>We went to the drive in and saw huddles a

0:34:59.080 --> 0:35:01.719
<v Speaker 2>guy in ten days that was on Valentine's Day, And

0:35:01.760 --> 0:35:04.799
<v Speaker 2>here's a ticket stub, and here's the date that he

0:35:04.920 --> 0:35:08.160
<v Speaker 2>asked me to get this lingerie. I had these photos

0:35:08.160 --> 0:35:09.719
<v Speaker 2>with the dates on them, and it would be like

0:35:09.840 --> 0:35:13.400
<v Speaker 2>him shirtless in his house or me laying on the

0:35:13.440 --> 0:35:16.759
<v Speaker 2>floor with his dog us on the beach in California,

0:35:16.800 --> 0:35:18.360
<v Speaker 2>with like his arms wrapped around me.

0:35:19.040 --> 0:35:21.960
<v Speaker 1>Detective Durbin told Stephanie about one last thing they could

0:35:22.000 --> 0:35:25.080
<v Speaker 1>do to build a case against Mark. They referred to

0:35:25.120 --> 0:35:28.680
<v Speaker 1>it as a confrontation call. She explained how it would work.

0:35:29.600 --> 0:35:34.240
<v Speaker 2>I call him and it's basically to try to get

0:35:34.360 --> 0:35:37.200
<v Speaker 2>him to admit to what he did. The detectives are

0:35:37.200 --> 0:35:39.920
<v Speaker 2>in the room unbeknownst to him, and so there's a

0:35:39.920 --> 0:35:41.520
<v Speaker 2>record of that, so that then they can go in

0:35:41.600 --> 0:35:44.800
<v Speaker 2>and without a doubt arrest him. She said, you don't

0:35:44.880 --> 0:35:47.960
<v Speaker 2>have to do this. Sometimes it is healing for people.

0:35:48.040 --> 0:35:51.440
<v Speaker 2>Sometimes it's the opposite. And I said, yeah, let's call

0:35:51.480 --> 0:35:54.200
<v Speaker 2>that motherfucker. He is teaching and I want to make

0:35:54.239 --> 0:35:55.480
<v Speaker 2>sure he's never teaching again.

0:35:56.560 --> 0:35:59.520
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie flew from LA to Phoenix to meet Detective Durbin

0:35:59.600 --> 0:36:03.440
<v Speaker 1>and another detective who would be present for the call. Together,

0:36:03.719 --> 0:36:04.680
<v Speaker 1>they made a game plan.

0:36:05.719 --> 0:36:08.600
<v Speaker 2>It was super nerve racking because I don't want to

0:36:08.600 --> 0:36:11.440
<v Speaker 2>hear his voice, but if I can get him to

0:36:11.600 --> 0:36:14.160
<v Speaker 2>admit this, there's no going back.

0:36:15.040 --> 0:36:18.800
<v Speaker 1>Then, with the two detectives by her side, she dialed

0:36:18.880 --> 0:36:19.600
<v Speaker 1>Mark's number.

0:36:20.480 --> 0:36:26.280
<v Speaker 2>I called him and he answered, and I just started saying,

0:36:26.440 --> 0:36:30.400
<v Speaker 2>I need closure. I was fourteen and I was your student.

0:36:31.000 --> 0:36:33.680
<v Speaker 2>Why did you do that? And He's like, I was immature,

0:36:34.360 --> 0:36:38.840
<v Speaker 2>and he admitted to knowing I was fourteen, admitted to

0:36:38.880 --> 0:36:41.120
<v Speaker 2>knowing I was a student. I hope you have a

0:36:41.200 --> 0:36:43.160
<v Speaker 2>really great day, is how he ended it.

0:36:43.880 --> 0:36:45.600
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie felt quiet.

0:36:45.800 --> 0:36:48.320
<v Speaker 2>And Detective Durbin was like, how are you doing it okay?

0:36:48.719 --> 0:36:52.640
<v Speaker 2>And I said that was so weird because that man

0:36:52.719 --> 0:36:56.120
<v Speaker 2>controlled so much of my life for the last twenty years.

0:36:56.440 --> 0:36:58.799
<v Speaker 2>And she looked at me and she said, just so

0:36:58.960 --> 0:37:03.000
<v Speaker 2>you know, you had full control of that conversation. He

0:37:03.160 --> 0:37:06.480
<v Speaker 2>was fumbling over himself because you had full control.

0:37:09.200 --> 0:37:12.680
<v Speaker 1>Two days later, Mark was arrested. The story was picked

0:37:12.719 --> 0:37:14.760
<v Speaker 1>up by the local news.

0:37:14.680 --> 0:37:17.160
<v Speaker 3>And a Royal public school teacher has been arrested accused

0:37:17.160 --> 0:37:20.759
<v Speaker 3>of sexual abuse of a miner in Arizona. Police say

0:37:20.920 --> 0:37:24.000
<v Speaker 3>Mark Lindard is a teacher at Vista Peeke Preparatory School.

0:37:24.320 --> 0:37:26.239
<v Speaker 3>He's been placed on administrative leave.

0:37:27.280 --> 0:37:30.680
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie and her team prepared for trial Stephanie started having

0:37:30.680 --> 0:37:33.720
<v Speaker 1>calls with the DA in Tucson. She was also assigned

0:37:33.719 --> 0:37:37.600
<v Speaker 1>to victim advocate. A few weeks after Mark's arrest, she

0:37:37.800 --> 0:37:40.160
<v Speaker 1>was sent his indictment and.

0:37:40.160 --> 0:37:42.279
<v Speaker 2>It says my name on it, and it says his name,

0:37:42.320 --> 0:37:44.560
<v Speaker 2>and it says the Corps, and it says the charges,

0:37:45.239 --> 0:37:48.360
<v Speaker 2>and each charge is explained in explicit detail.

0:37:49.120 --> 0:37:52.600
<v Speaker 1>All in all, Mark Lyndrude was facing twenty one charges,

0:37:53.239 --> 0:37:56.560
<v Speaker 1>twenty counts of sexual conduct with a miner and one

0:37:56.640 --> 0:37:58.840
<v Speaker 1>count of sexual abuse of a minor.

0:37:59.680 --> 0:38:03.200
<v Speaker 2>To read those words and then put it together with

0:38:03.719 --> 0:38:07.600
<v Speaker 2>that was me, I'm sl that's named in all of

0:38:07.640 --> 0:38:08.040
<v Speaker 2>these things.

0:38:08.040 --> 0:38:08.480
<v Speaker 1>That was me.

0:38:09.600 --> 0:38:12.600
<v Speaker 2>This is real and what was done to me was

0:38:12.640 --> 0:38:13.160
<v Speaker 2>really bad.

0:38:13.920 --> 0:38:17.000
<v Speaker 1>The one thing she'd spent so long trying to hide

0:38:17.360 --> 0:38:18.960
<v Speaker 1>was now headline news.

0:38:19.400 --> 0:38:21.200
<v Speaker 2>I kind of just sat with myself in it, and

0:38:21.239 --> 0:38:23.600
<v Speaker 2>I said, I can do one of two things. I

0:38:23.680 --> 0:38:27.840
<v Speaker 2>can become smaller and I can feel ashamed, or I

0:38:27.880 --> 0:38:29.720
<v Speaker 2>can say no, I'm taking back my power.

0:38:30.440 --> 0:38:36.400
<v Speaker 1>After years of keeping Mark's secret, Stephanie was done staying quiet.

0:38:36.840 --> 0:38:40.160
<v Speaker 1>A trial was set for January of twenty twenty two,

0:38:40.239 --> 0:38:43.040
<v Speaker 1>but Mark and his legal team delayed it and then

0:38:43.080 --> 0:38:47.239
<v Speaker 1>delayed it again and again. Mark was always having some

0:38:47.400 --> 0:38:50.759
<v Speaker 1>kind of emergency or new evidence was being entered into

0:38:50.800 --> 0:38:55.080
<v Speaker 1>discovery that caused the trial to be postponed. It was exhausting.

0:38:56.440 --> 0:39:00.160
<v Speaker 1>After a while, the prosecution started to talk about giving

0:39:00.200 --> 0:39:01.040
<v Speaker 1>Mark a plea deal.

0:39:01.600 --> 0:39:03.160
<v Speaker 2>If we give the plea deal, al least I know

0:39:03.200 --> 0:39:07.279
<v Speaker 2>he goes to jail, offer him the plea deal. So

0:39:07.360 --> 0:39:10.359
<v Speaker 2>they did, and he declined the plea deal.

0:39:11.160 --> 0:39:14.160
<v Speaker 1>This meant there would be a trial after all, and

0:39:14.239 --> 0:39:16.160
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie would have to face Mark in court.

0:39:16.800 --> 0:39:21.040
<v Speaker 2>The reality was setting in of I have to talk

0:39:21.080 --> 0:39:24.560
<v Speaker 2>about these charges and their explicit details in a room

0:39:24.600 --> 0:39:25.480
<v Speaker 2>full of strangers.

0:39:26.560 --> 0:39:29.839
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie had spent years keeping this secret and many more

0:39:29.920 --> 0:39:34.279
<v Speaker 1>years pushing this trauma down, but now she had to

0:39:34.280 --> 0:39:37.480
<v Speaker 1>face it head on. Not only would Stephanie have to

0:39:37.520 --> 0:39:40.160
<v Speaker 1>say what Mark had done to her out loud, but

0:39:40.239 --> 0:39:43.880
<v Speaker 1>she would have to testify to her trauma an intimate detail,

0:39:44.239 --> 0:39:47.759
<v Speaker 1>to a full room of strangers, and then those strangers

0:39:47.840 --> 0:39:51.160
<v Speaker 1>would have to decide if she was credible, if they

0:39:51.200 --> 0:39:55.799
<v Speaker 1>believed her. She remembered her high school principal who wrote

0:39:55.800 --> 0:39:59.040
<v Speaker 1>her off, and the girls who started rumors about her.

0:40:00.040 --> 0:40:02.120
<v Speaker 1>She felt like she had been on trial her whole life,

0:40:02.640 --> 0:40:06.440
<v Speaker 1>and every jury had found her guilty or dismissed the case.

0:40:07.320 --> 0:40:10.560
<v Speaker 1>What if this jury came to the same conclusions. She

0:40:10.680 --> 0:40:13.520
<v Speaker 1>shared her concerns with the DA.

0:40:13.880 --> 0:40:15.759
<v Speaker 2>The DA said, I just want you to know that,

0:40:15.880 --> 0:40:21.799
<v Speaker 2>no matter what happened, I believe you the validation in

0:40:21.840 --> 0:40:25.200
<v Speaker 2>that of maybe he won't be found guilty of anything,

0:40:25.719 --> 0:40:29.600
<v Speaker 2>but I am this team of people who support me.

0:40:29.640 --> 0:40:34.120
<v Speaker 1>In that way, she knew whatever came next, she wouldn't

0:40:34.160 --> 0:40:38.719
<v Speaker 1>be alone. Stephanie flew from la back to Arizona for court.

0:40:39.360 --> 0:40:42.200
<v Speaker 1>The night before the trial, she had a panic attack.

0:40:42.960 --> 0:40:44.840
<v Speaker 2>I thought I was dying, and it was just the

0:40:44.880 --> 0:40:47.480
<v Speaker 2>biggest panic attack that I've had ever in my life.

0:40:48.120 --> 0:40:50.399
<v Speaker 1>The walls felt like they were caving in on her.

0:40:51.120 --> 0:40:54.880
<v Speaker 1>She went to bed feeling shaky.

0:40:55.200 --> 0:40:57.200
<v Speaker 2>I don't know what happened in my sleep that night,

0:40:57.280 --> 0:40:59.160
<v Speaker 2>but I woke up in the morning and I was like,

0:40:59.520 --> 0:41:03.120
<v Speaker 2>let's fuckk Ago, Let's do this. The only way I

0:41:03.160 --> 0:41:07.960
<v Speaker 2>can describe it is like an athlete going into a game.

0:41:08.440 --> 0:41:10.160
<v Speaker 2>You just put your head in the game and there's

0:41:10.239 --> 0:41:12.680
<v Speaker 2>nothing else you're thinking of. Laser focused.

0:41:13.440 --> 0:41:15.480
<v Speaker 1>The trial began with jury selection.

0:41:16.360 --> 0:41:20.719
<v Speaker 2>The saddest part about jury's selection. One of the questions

0:41:20.760 --> 0:41:24.959
<v Speaker 2>they asked was have you or anyone you know been

0:41:25.760 --> 0:41:29.719
<v Speaker 2>raped or sexual assaulted? And the amount of a jurors

0:41:29.920 --> 0:41:32.719
<v Speaker 2>who had to be excused because they had, in one

0:41:32.760 --> 0:41:37.640
<v Speaker 2>way or another been affected by sexual assault further fueled

0:41:37.640 --> 0:41:41.200
<v Speaker 2>me of being like, let's go. This idiot is not

0:41:41.239 --> 0:41:42.080
<v Speaker 2>getting away with this.

0:41:43.440 --> 0:41:47.160
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie took the stand. The prosecutor asked her questions about

0:41:47.200 --> 0:41:50.640
<v Speaker 1>what she had endured, and she answered them. Her voice

0:41:50.680 --> 0:41:53.880
<v Speaker 1>was strong and she was in control. Then it was

0:41:53.920 --> 0:41:56.960
<v Speaker 1>time for Stephanie to be cross examined by Mark's attorney.

0:41:57.800 --> 0:42:02.440
<v Speaker 2>She clearly did not have a because he already admitted.

0:42:02.040 --> 0:42:06.240
<v Speaker 1>Gil so if the facts couldn't be debated, Mark's attorney

0:42:06.280 --> 0:42:07.800
<v Speaker 1>had one last plan of attack.

0:42:08.719 --> 0:42:12.320
<v Speaker 2>She opened up her entire thing saying, Stephanie Langletz is

0:42:12.360 --> 0:42:17.440
<v Speaker 2>a liar. I was like, that is your defense, let's go,

0:42:18.080 --> 0:42:19.120
<v Speaker 2>let's go.

0:42:19.960 --> 0:42:21.520
<v Speaker 1>The cross examination began.

0:42:22.400 --> 0:42:25.920
<v Speaker 2>She would ask me questions like you're saying he met

0:42:26.000 --> 0:42:30.239
<v Speaker 2>you at a public park. That's crazy, and I'm like, yes,

0:42:31.360 --> 0:42:34.319
<v Speaker 2>it is crazy. There was nothing she could have said

0:42:34.320 --> 0:42:35.000
<v Speaker 2>that rattled me.

0:42:35.719 --> 0:42:38.719
<v Speaker 1>When the prosecutor was wrapping up, he asked if there

0:42:38.800 --> 0:42:41.200
<v Speaker 1>was anything else Stephanie wanted to share.

0:42:41.680 --> 0:42:44.759
<v Speaker 2>And I said, yeah, I do. As many times as

0:42:44.760 --> 0:42:46.560
<v Speaker 2>I saw that number pop up on my phone, I

0:42:46.600 --> 0:42:48.719
<v Speaker 2>could tell you what his phone ever was right now.

0:42:49.360 --> 0:42:51.160
<v Speaker 2>And so the diegoes what was it? And I said

0:42:51.200 --> 0:42:54.719
<v Speaker 2>five to two nine oh four. And I looked directly

0:42:54.760 --> 0:42:57.200
<v Speaker 2>in the eyes of Mark when I said it, and

0:42:57.239 --> 0:43:01.400
<v Speaker 2>I said five to nine oh four, I remember everything.

0:43:02.400 --> 0:43:07.320
<v Speaker 2>You will not get away with this, and his face dropped.

0:43:08.040 --> 0:43:09.560
<v Speaker 2>You could just see the defeat.

0:43:11.400 --> 0:43:13.360
<v Speaker 1>The next day, it was timed with the jury to

0:43:13.440 --> 0:43:16.440
<v Speaker 1>decide whether Mark was innocent or guilty of the twenty

0:43:16.480 --> 0:43:20.279
<v Speaker 1>one charges against him. Stephanie was hopeful that he would

0:43:20.320 --> 0:43:23.480
<v Speaker 1>be found guilty on at least a few counts, but

0:43:23.560 --> 0:43:25.600
<v Speaker 1>she didn't want to set her hopes too high.

0:43:26.280 --> 0:43:30.840
<v Speaker 2>Because each one they have to find me credible.

0:43:30.560 --> 0:43:35.040
<v Speaker 1>For Finally, the jury reached a verdict. Everyone filed back

0:43:35.040 --> 0:43:37.680
<v Speaker 1>into the courtroom and found their seats.

0:43:38.960 --> 0:43:44.760
<v Speaker 2>He was found guilty on every single count, every single count.

0:43:44.840 --> 0:43:48.640
<v Speaker 2>They found him guilty on all twenty one counts. I

0:43:48.680 --> 0:43:53.560
<v Speaker 2>did not expect that, and that was so powerful. These

0:43:53.600 --> 0:43:56.239
<v Speaker 2>people who are total strangers, they believe me.

0:43:57.320 --> 0:44:00.279
<v Speaker 1>A month later, Stephanie traveled back to Tucson, from mark

0:44:00.360 --> 0:44:04.120
<v Speaker 1>sentencing hearing, she shared a victim impact statement.

0:44:05.040 --> 0:44:09.080
<v Speaker 2>You stole my teenage years for me. I didn't get

0:44:09.080 --> 0:44:11.040
<v Speaker 2>to go to prom, I didn't get to do anything

0:44:11.120 --> 0:44:13.960
<v Speaker 2>like a teenager does, and instead I found myself at

0:44:13.960 --> 0:44:16.239
<v Speaker 2>the bottom of a bottle for many years. And you

0:44:16.280 --> 0:44:19.760
<v Speaker 2>have affected every relationship of my life. And I said,

0:44:20.239 --> 0:44:23.600
<v Speaker 2>your attorney had no defense, so her defense was to

0:44:23.640 --> 0:44:27.319
<v Speaker 2>paint me as a liar. This is why so many

0:44:27.480 --> 0:44:31.359
<v Speaker 2>victims don't come forward, is because they're afraid people aren't

0:44:31.360 --> 0:44:32.400
<v Speaker 2>gonna believe them.

0:44:33.239 --> 0:44:37.000
<v Speaker 1>Later that day, the judge read mark sentence allowed. They

0:44:37.040 --> 0:44:40.160
<v Speaker 1>went through all twenty one counts and for each count

0:44:40.160 --> 0:44:43.239
<v Speaker 1>he was found guilty of, there was time added to

0:44:43.280 --> 0:44:48.560
<v Speaker 1>a sentence. Mark Lyndrude was sentenced to sixty six years

0:44:48.600 --> 0:44:49.040
<v Speaker 1>in prison.

0:44:50.560 --> 0:44:52.960
<v Speaker 2>This man, at this point is in his fifties, so

0:44:53.040 --> 0:44:54.920
<v Speaker 2>he is going to die in jail.

0:44:56.160 --> 0:44:58.879
<v Speaker 1>After the trial, a few students who attended the high

0:44:58.880 --> 0:45:02.040
<v Speaker 1>school where Mark had bin tie reached out to Stephanie.

0:45:02.760 --> 0:45:06.360
<v Speaker 2>They thanked me for what I did, and they're like,

0:45:06.480 --> 0:45:09.640
<v Speaker 2>he creeped us out. He was my sister's teacher, and

0:45:09.880 --> 0:45:11.960
<v Speaker 2>he was saying he was excited for me to be

0:45:12.000 --> 0:45:14.439
<v Speaker 2>in his class. And we just want to tell you

0:45:15.120 --> 0:45:19.120
<v Speaker 2>thank you for protecting us. That's why I did it.

0:45:19.760 --> 0:45:22.879
<v Speaker 2>I know that they're safe and he will never do

0:45:22.920 --> 0:45:24.800
<v Speaker 2>this to someone ever again.

0:45:26.200 --> 0:45:29.080
<v Speaker 1>It didn't have to take this song to stop Mark's abuse.

0:45:29.680 --> 0:45:32.240
<v Speaker 1>Stephanie's high school heard about it while it was happening

0:45:32.560 --> 0:45:34.480
<v Speaker 1>and failed to properly investigate.

0:45:35.120 --> 0:45:38.480
<v Speaker 2>The school did nothing to protect me. I do think

0:45:38.520 --> 0:45:43.720
<v Speaker 2>that they are culpable. Signs were there and they missed

0:45:43.760 --> 0:45:44.160
<v Speaker 2>a lot.

0:45:44.960 --> 0:45:48.200
<v Speaker 1>After ten years in Los Angeles, Stephanie moved back to

0:45:48.280 --> 0:45:52.160
<v Speaker 1>Arizona with her son. They live in Phoenix now, where

0:45:52.200 --> 0:45:55.840
<v Speaker 1>she runs her own creative marketing studio, and in the

0:45:55.920 --> 0:45:59.440
<v Speaker 1>last few years, Stephanie has formed some close friendships.

0:46:00.080 --> 0:46:03.160
<v Speaker 2>I all of a sudden had this amazing group of

0:46:03.200 --> 0:46:05.520
<v Speaker 2>women around me, and it was the first time in

0:46:05.600 --> 0:46:08.560
<v Speaker 2>my entire life that I had girlfriends like a good

0:46:08.600 --> 0:46:12.560
<v Speaker 2>supportive group of girlfriends. We all support each other, we

0:46:12.600 --> 0:46:14.799
<v Speaker 2>all want the best, and that is so genuine.

0:46:15.560 --> 0:46:19.160
<v Speaker 1>When Stephanie walked into Mark Lyndrid's classroom all those years ago,

0:46:19.520 --> 0:46:22.719
<v Speaker 1>she was alone. She struggled to make friends and it

0:46:22.760 --> 0:46:26.680
<v Speaker 1>felt like nobody understood her. But she's not alone anymore.

0:46:27.400 --> 0:46:30.800
<v Speaker 1>At Stephanie's birthday party. This year, one of her friends

0:46:30.800 --> 0:46:36.080
<v Speaker 1>made a toast. There's a recording of it. Her friend

0:46:36.239 --> 0:46:38.680
<v Speaker 1>raises the glass and talks about all the things she

0:46:38.800 --> 0:46:41.920
<v Speaker 1>loves and cherishes about Stephanie, and then the rest of

0:46:41.960 --> 0:46:50.840
<v Speaker 1>her friends jump in to sing Happy Birthday. Stephanie is

0:46:50.880 --> 0:46:56.040
<v Speaker 1>beaming while tears well in her eyes.

0:46:56.920 --> 0:47:00.200
<v Speaker 2>They don't see me as a victim or survivor of

0:47:00.239 --> 0:47:03.400
<v Speaker 2>sexual abuse. They see me as who I am today.

0:47:04.200 --> 0:47:06.040
<v Speaker 2>I'm truly happy the first time.

0:47:09.960 --> 0:47:13.399
<v Speaker 1>We end every weekly episode with the same question, why

0:47:13.440 --> 0:47:15.920
<v Speaker 1>do you want to share your story?

0:47:16.200 --> 0:47:19.799
<v Speaker 2>Unfortunately, twenty something years after this happened to me, it

0:47:19.880 --> 0:47:22.719
<v Speaker 2>still happens. No kids should have to go through this.

0:47:23.640 --> 0:47:26.640
<v Speaker 2>It wasn't you. You didn't invite this, you didn't open

0:47:26.640 --> 0:47:30.239
<v Speaker 2>yourself up to this. You were manipulated, you were groomed.

0:47:30.719 --> 0:47:35.520
<v Speaker 2>You did nothing wrong. There's no shame, there's no guilt,

0:47:36.560 --> 0:47:40.440
<v Speaker 2>and there really is a lot of power and validation

0:47:40.719 --> 0:47:48.960
<v Speaker 2>on the other side.

0:47:49.680 --> 0:47:52.120
<v Speaker 1>On the next episode of Betrayal Weekly.

0:47:52.320 --> 0:47:56.640
<v Speaker 4>I saw this figure standing in the doorway. He was

0:47:56.680 --> 0:48:00.520
<v Speaker 4>an all black and a batman mask and covered head

0:48:00.560 --> 0:48:04.200
<v Speaker 4>to toe in black clothing. I have closing and opening

0:48:04.200 --> 0:48:05.680
<v Speaker 4>my eyes, like am I really seeing this.

0:48:12.200 --> 0:48:14.920
<v Speaker 1>If you'd like to share your story on Betrayal, please

0:48:14.960 --> 0:48:19.480
<v Speaker 1>email Betrayal Pod at gmail dot com. That is Betrayal

0:48:19.719 --> 0:48:24.319
<v Speaker 1>Pod at gmail dot com. Please note that we are

0:48:24.440 --> 0:48:28.480
<v Speaker 1>not a mental health organization. If you are in crisis

0:48:28.600 --> 0:48:32.760
<v Speaker 1>or currently experiencing domestic violence, we encourage you to seek

0:48:32.840 --> 0:48:36.719
<v Speaker 1>local help or dial nine to one one. Please contact

0:48:36.840 --> 0:48:41.239
<v Speaker 1>organizations that offer immediate support. In our show notes, we've

0:48:41.280 --> 0:48:45.480
<v Speaker 1>included a list of US based resources. You can follow

0:48:45.560 --> 0:48:48.839
<v Speaker 1>us on Instagram at betrayal Pod or find me at

0:48:48.880 --> 0:48:53.040
<v Speaker 1>It's Andrea Gunning. To access our newsletter and additional content,

0:48:53.200 --> 0:48:56.480
<v Speaker 1>and to connect with the Betrayal community, join our substack

0:48:56.560 --> 0:49:00.920
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0:49:01.320 --> 0:49:03.799
<v Speaker 1>One way to show support is by subscribing to our

0:49:03.840 --> 0:49:07.000
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0:49:07.040 --> 0:49:11.239
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0:49:11.320 --> 0:49:14.400
<v Speaker 1>thank you to all of our listeners. Betrayal is a

0:49:14.400 --> 0:49:17.919
<v Speaker 1>production of Glass Podcasts, a division of Glass Entertainment Group,

0:49:18.000 --> 0:49:22.240
<v Speaker 1>in partnership with iHeart Podcasts. The show is executive produced

0:49:22.239 --> 0:49:25.759
<v Speaker 1>by Nancy Glass and Jennifer Fason, hosted and produced by

0:49:25.800 --> 0:49:29.880
<v Speaker 1>me Andrea Gunning, written and produced by Olivia Hewitt. Our

0:49:29.960 --> 0:49:34.120
<v Speaker 1>story editor is Monique Lebord, also produced by Ben Fetterman.

0:49:34.640 --> 0:49:39.880
<v Speaker 1>Our associate producer is Leah Jablow. Production management by Kristin Melcurie.

0:49:40.320 --> 0:49:44.200
<v Speaker 1>Booking support by Curry Richmond. Our iHeart team is Ali

0:49:44.280 --> 0:49:48.319
<v Speaker 1>Perry and Treessica Crincheck. Audio editing by Tanner Robbins, with

0:49:48.360 --> 0:49:52.720
<v Speaker 1>additional editing and mixing by Matt Delbecchio. Betrayal's theme composed

0:49:52.719 --> 0:49:57.400
<v Speaker 1>by Oliver Bains. Music library provided by my Music and

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