WEBVTT - 2nd Date Update PODCAST: I've Gotta Fly

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<v Speaker 1>Need Lasic trust the experienced team at the Lasic Center

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<v Speaker 1>What will you do Lasic at Evergreen dot com Rooking

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<v Speaker 1>Jewels Second date Update. We've done a lot of second

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<v Speaker 1>day updates where someone's tried to joke around and it's

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<v Speaker 1>gone really bad. But I don't think anything is worse

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<v Speaker 1>than today's dude name Evan is on the phone for

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<v Speaker 1>a second day update and his joke went really really bad.

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<v Speaker 1>What's up, Evan? How are you hey? I'm doing better now.

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<v Speaker 1>Congratulations on the biggest joke fail in a second day

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<v Speaker 1>update we've had so far, So good, good work. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>you're welcome. I can't even imagine what you're joking about,

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<v Speaker 1>like dead puppy. Well, I mean we have some class

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<v Speaker 1>where you know we're not crazy. There was death involved, though,

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<v Speaker 1>we'll get to that in just a second. But first,

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<v Speaker 1>tell us about the girl you want to call today.

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<v Speaker 1>What's her name? Vanessa? Vanessa? All right? And where did

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<v Speaker 1>you meet Vanessa? Just off of a dating site? How

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<v Speaker 1>are you feeling going into this date? Oh? It was

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<v Speaker 1>feeling great. There was some initial chemistry, just kind of

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<v Speaker 1>chatting online back and forth and talking on the phone

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<v Speaker 1>a bit. And when I saw a picture, she has

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<v Speaker 1>the most real lips I've ever seen. I don't know

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<v Speaker 1>if that makes any sense when I say that, really,

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, I just picture like anti Kardashian lip. But

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<v Speaker 1>that's all I mean. It's just like there's just way

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<v Speaker 1>too much plastic surgery out there. I think there's a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of big fake lips, big fake butts out there.

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<v Speaker 1>All right, So you liked her real lips? Did you

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<v Speaker 1>like anything else about her? I mean, you know, everything,

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<v Speaker 1>everything was working for me. She was a great conversationalist,

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<v Speaker 1>for sure. But unfortunately the conversation got interrupted. So we're

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<v Speaker 1>at this open air restaurant and they have little bits

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<v Speaker 1>of bread and olive oil and parmesan cheese you can

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<v Speaker 1>kind of dip in and whatnot. That always means it's

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<v Speaker 1>a fancy place. Yeah, you're dipping bread and olive oil.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, you're paying a little bit more. And we're

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<v Speaker 1>starting to settle in and there this one fly that

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<v Speaker 1>just does not leave our table alone. And at first

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<v Speaker 1>it's like landing just here and there, and like you

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<v Speaker 1>a big deal. It starts getting a little persistent and

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<v Speaker 1>it's like flying around my face a bit like pleasant

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<v Speaker 1>by my ears. There's nothing more annoying than a fly

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<v Speaker 1>that won't leave you alone. Yeah, and they're so gross

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<v Speaker 1>to me. So while we were waving around, I thought

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<v Speaker 1>it would be funny if I like bit at the fly,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, to bring a little humor in like a

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<v Speaker 1>dog would like, you know, snap at you know. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I like the flies flying around a dog always trying

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<v Speaker 1>to catch it with their mouth. Okay, I guess that'd

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<v Speaker 1>be funny, I think, yeah, but not during a date.

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<v Speaker 1>Sounds really unattractive. But continue, I mean, we're goofing around

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<v Speaker 1>a bit. It's it's no big deal. So I go

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<v Speaker 1>and do it. And the first time I go to

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<v Speaker 1>do it, I actually catch the fly and bite it

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<v Speaker 1>in half. That is disgusting. What did you do? Yeah?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah it was. It was. It's gross but also talented,

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<v Speaker 1>Like did you even know that you could do that?

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't. It was like an awakening moment and I'm like, wow,

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<v Speaker 1>oh my god, oh my god, what happened? What did

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<v Speaker 1>you do? Well? The rough part was it was kind

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<v Speaker 1>of a bigger fly. Oh oh, so you're mad because

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<v Speaker 1>you ruined your appetite? Oh yeah, you guys are at dinner.

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<v Speaker 1>You ruined your appetite and then the whole date went horrible.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh it was so bad from there. It just and

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<v Speaker 1>it wasn't even like a fast downhill. It was just

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<v Speaker 1>slow burning, like trying to save the date for another hour.

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<v Speaker 1>And it's like, what right, it mustn't looked like you

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<v Speaker 1>did it on purpose, you know. Yeah, And the fly's

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<v Speaker 1>head lands like perfectly this waity tablecloth gross out, and

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<v Speaker 1>it feel kind of like rigor mortis whatever, like fishing

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<v Speaker 1>around and realizing that I had done that and realizing

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<v Speaker 1>the other half of the fly in my mouth still,

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm like, well, I need to get rid of this.

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<v Speaker 1>I really just want to spit this out. That's gonna

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<v Speaker 1>make it even worse. And I just like, yeah, that's

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<v Speaker 1>a tough position to be. It was like do I

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<v Speaker 1>spit it out or do I swallow it? Neither of

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<v Speaker 1>those is a good solution with these sort of weird

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<v Speaker 1>purse lips, I kind of say, and like I go

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<v Speaker 1>to the bathroom, I wash my mouth out a bit.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, that is the most calm reaction I

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<v Speaker 1>think of anyone doing that that I could have ever, Like,

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<v Speaker 1>excuse me, I'm going to go to the bathroom, like

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<v Speaker 1>I thought for sure she wouldn't think that it's on purpose.

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<v Speaker 1>Inside I was panicking, don't get me wrong, And time

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<v Speaker 1>was going by us so slowly. Oh what does she

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<v Speaker 1>say at first? Like when when it actually happened, she

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<v Speaker 1>was just like oh, just this look of shock, and like, well, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>it's like what kind of monster am I on a

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<v Speaker 1>date with? Exactly right, like this freak? Why did you

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<v Speaker 1>feel like you had to play it off? Like why

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<v Speaker 1>wouldn't you freak out? She was obviously freaking out. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>freaking out just even hearing the story. Yeah, but he

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<v Speaker 1>was kind of crowded and there all these other people around,

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<v Speaker 1>and I just knew it was going to get worse

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<v Speaker 1>if I So after I went to the bathroom, I

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<v Speaker 1>came back and I tried to make a joke about

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<v Speaker 1>the whole thing, and I said, well, at least mister

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<v Speaker 1>Miyagi would be proud, Yeah, right, that thing that I

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<v Speaker 1>should have heard all that laughter, and I heard nothing,

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<v Speaker 1>just this look of humh. She didn't get your joke. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>maybe she just didn't understand it. Now she doesn't know

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<v Speaker 1>karate kids, Yeah, that is like a thirty year old movie.

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<v Speaker 1>It's a pretty dated joke. So from the fly into

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<v Speaker 1>then to that red flag, because if you can't get

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<v Speaker 1>the reference, I mean, come on, yeah, then she's just

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<v Speaker 1>like who's this mister Miyagi guy? And why would he

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<v Speaker 1>be proud of you? And I'm like, oh, there's this

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<v Speaker 1>real popular movie back in that day. And then like

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<v Speaker 1>some awkward conversation after that. Yeah, he tried to pick

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<v Speaker 1>up back our menus and tried to pick up but

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<v Speaker 1>like the appetite was just gone. Yeah. Yeah, we got

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<v Speaker 1>like one more drink and then bounced out, and like

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<v Speaker 1>she she came up and she she initiated this hug

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<v Speaker 1>and I was like, oh, whoa, hey, that's that's cool,

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<v Speaker 1>but it was a very must like here's the hugy. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>she's not interested in to kiss for sure, nobody's going

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<v Speaker 1>to kiss fly eater. Yeah. So I mean, I'm just

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<v Speaker 1>trying to see if I could get you guys to

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<v Speaker 1>get in touch with her, help me out some way,

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<v Speaker 1>and just like, can I just have a redo? Can

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<v Speaker 1>we just pretend that never happened? And has she talked

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<v Speaker 1>to you at all since your date? No? Not a thing, nothing,

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<v Speaker 1>All right? Cool, we'll play a song and then come

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<v Speaker 1>back and call her and get your second date up date.

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<v Speaker 1>All right, great looking jubil in the morning. How's the

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<v Speaker 1>old nurser? I'm go. I know an old lady who's

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<v Speaker 1>swallowed a fly. I don't know why she swallowed the fly.

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<v Speaker 1>Perhaps she'll die. Yeah, Well, I know a second date

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<v Speaker 1>or who's swallowed a fly. And who knows why he

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<v Speaker 1>swallowed a fly. Because he's an effing animal, that's why.

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<v Speaker 1>Because he's a maniac. And his name is Evan, and

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<v Speaker 1>he's on the phone with us right now. And yes,

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<v Speaker 1>Evan bit the head off a fly on his first date.

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<v Speaker 1>If you're just tuning in, I need to explain a

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<v Speaker 1>little bit because you're probably like, what. Yeah, he was

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<v Speaker 1>at dinner with his date and there was a fly

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<v Speaker 1>buzzing around his head. So he thought, I'm gonna joke

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<v Speaker 1>around and try to like nip at it like how

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<v Speaker 1>dogs do. And then he did, and he actually caught

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<v Speaker 1>the fly and then bit it in half. And I

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<v Speaker 1>guess one part of the fly fell down to the table,

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<v Speaker 1>the other one stayed in his mouth. He ran to

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<v Speaker 1>the restroom, cleaned out his mouth. Probably should have just

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<v Speaker 1>jumped off the top of the building. But anyway, cleaned

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<v Speaker 1>out his mouth, went back to the table, tried to

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<v Speaker 1>explain it, and his date wasn't really filling him after that.

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<v Speaker 1>So now we're about to get her on the phone

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<v Speaker 1>and see if he can get a redo. All right, Evan,

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<v Speaker 1>you animal? Are you you ready to give her a call?

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<v Speaker 1>Let's do it. Man, my god, I really think that

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<v Speaker 1>your mistake wasn't the accidental fly biting. It was the

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<v Speaker 1>calm reaction you had afterwards that made you feel more

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<v Speaker 1>like a serial killer. Oh yeah, slowly biting the head

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<v Speaker 1>off a fly and then staring her directly and ye

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<v Speaker 1>the whole time. That's pretty cold. I'm all right, Well,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna dial her fund of her right now and

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<v Speaker 1>see we can help you out. Here we go, Hello him,

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<v Speaker 1>I speak to Vanessa. Please. This is Vanessa. Hey Vanessa,

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<v Speaker 1>how are you? This is jew Bill from brook and

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<v Speaker 1>jew Bil in the morning. And what's Brooklyn jew Ba.

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<v Speaker 1>That's a good question. It's a radio show, Okay, okay.

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<v Speaker 1>It airs on radio stations like most Yeah, okay, appropriate

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<v Speaker 1>place for it to be. Why are you calling? Well,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm calling because we do a segment on our show

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<v Speaker 1>it's called the second date update. That's worth if you

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<v Speaker 1>go out on a date with somebody and then don't

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<v Speaker 1>call them back after they can email us to get

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<v Speaker 1>you on the phone and figure out why. And we

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<v Speaker 1>got an email about you from a listener. His name

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<v Speaker 1>is Evan. Oh that guy, Yeah, he's probably yep, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>he um got a thing with flies. Yeah yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>we actually talked of it about that date where he

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<v Speaker 1>accidentally bit a fly in half? Oh god, so gross?

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<v Speaker 1>Have you been referring to him as fly guy this

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<v Speaker 1>whole time? Somewhat? But I kind of don't talk about

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<v Speaker 1>him anymore. Yeah. It's probably a place you want to

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<v Speaker 1>get dark in your head so you don't have to

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<v Speaker 1>think about it. Yeah. Yeah, he told us about your date,

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<v Speaker 1>said that he really liked you and he was just

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<v Speaker 1>trying to joke around when that happened. But he understands that, like,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, obviously be disgusting to sit across from somebody

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<v Speaker 1>on a date and have them much into an insect

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<v Speaker 1>that they didn't order off the menu, right, And he's

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<v Speaker 1>wondering why you're not calling him back or texting him back.

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<v Speaker 1>It's not so much about the fly, I mean, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>that's gross and whatever. But the guy is like really

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<v Speaker 1>kind of rude and full of himself. I mean he

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<v Speaker 1>like pop culture shamed me. I guess what you might

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<v Speaker 1>want to say, pop culture shamed you. He did tell

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<v Speaker 1>us that he tried to tell you a Karate Kid joke,

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<v Speaker 1>and you didn't get the reference right, right right. There

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<v Speaker 1>was some mister Naggy Shaggy from the movie Karate Kid

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<v Speaker 1>back in the eighties. What's the name, mister Miyagi. Oh yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>that's the name. So I'm sitting in the restaurant and

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<v Speaker 1>it was sure to get really awkward because he was

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<v Speaker 1>like yelling at me because I haven't seen some ancient film.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, you just wouldn't go on and on about it.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel really uncomfortable. It really was making me feel bad,

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<v Speaker 1>as it should, like no person should be on a

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<v Speaker 1>date and be made to feel stupid, like he was

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<v Speaker 1>so condescending, and I'm thinking, you know, this is supposed

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<v Speaker 1>to be a nice, romantic date and this guy is

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<v Speaker 1>just sitting here grilling me about these eighties movies and

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<v Speaker 1>it's not what I didn't see them, and it makes

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<v Speaker 1>me feel bad. Yeah, I have seen people treat other

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<v Speaker 1>people as really stupid when they don't get pop culture references. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>I really take offense to that. And it didn't just

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<v Speaker 1>stop with that one movie. He kept making other references.

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<v Speaker 1>Is like Beverly Hills Cop was like another one. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't remember that one. Okay, I want to shame you

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<v Speaker 1>right now, because that was a great movie series. I don't. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>now I'm mad either. Yeah, yeah, but it's so I

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<v Speaker 1>don't I have no interest in seeing these movies. And

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<v Speaker 1>you know what, I don't even think they're probably funny either.

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<v Speaker 1>So not funny? Are you out of your mind when

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<v Speaker 1>you mean not funny? They're hilarious. But yeah, Evan, hang

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<v Speaker 1>on a second, Vanessa, that's Evan. He's actually on the

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<v Speaker 1>other line listing I wants to talk to you, and

0:11:28.679 --> 0:11:30.559
<v Speaker 1>usually you're supposed to wait until I bring you into

0:11:30.559 --> 0:11:33.680
<v Speaker 1>the conversation, but apparently Ivan couldn't wait. Nah. Yeah, I'm sorry,

0:11:33.679 --> 0:11:36.640
<v Speaker 1>but just like I don't get this, like, how can

0:11:36.679 --> 0:11:40.360
<v Speaker 1>you like may not know that many of them? And

0:11:40.480 --> 0:11:43.199
<v Speaker 1>oh my god, go again, why is it a law

0:11:43.400 --> 0:11:47.320
<v Speaker 1>or something. I'm know, I'm just like shocked, and it's

0:11:47.360 --> 0:11:50.920
<v Speaker 1>just I don't know, like obviously, I'm sure there's things

0:11:50.960 --> 0:11:53.559
<v Speaker 1>like I don't know about your world that you'd be like, Oh,

0:11:53.600 --> 0:11:55.760
<v Speaker 1>come on, I mean, I'm not trying to like make

0:11:55.840 --> 0:12:00.160
<v Speaker 1>you feel bad. It's just like, are making me feel bad? Well,

0:12:00.160 --> 0:12:05.960
<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry that sounded real sincere Wow, I mean I'm

0:12:05.960 --> 0:12:09.080
<v Speaker 1>really not. It's just like, yeah, I got that. I

0:12:09.160 --> 0:12:13.000
<v Speaker 1>was also being sarcastic. You're post a judgment on me,

0:12:13.440 --> 0:12:15.880
<v Speaker 1>you are, You're being very judgmental. Oh wow, I can't

0:12:15.920 --> 0:12:18.440
<v Speaker 1>believe this person did so it's all the world according

0:12:18.440 --> 0:12:21.360
<v Speaker 1>to Evan, Like, you know, you don't have room for

0:12:21.400 --> 0:12:23.560
<v Speaker 1>another person for a relationship. If this is the way

0:12:23.559 --> 0:12:26.560
<v Speaker 1>you're gonna behave well, I mean, if you watch the movies,

0:12:26.679 --> 0:12:30.760
<v Speaker 1>you change your mind. If I also hung up on

0:12:30.960 --> 0:12:35.199
<v Speaker 1>comedies and films from the late eighties early nineties, I'm

0:12:35.200 --> 0:12:38.400
<v Speaker 1>not hung up on them. I've seen other movies since then,

0:12:38.559 --> 0:12:42.520
<v Speaker 1>but like those are just gems of cinema. Evan, come on,

0:12:42.640 --> 0:12:44.960
<v Speaker 1>I mean, they're just movies. Don't you think you're overreacting.

0:12:45.360 --> 0:12:49.199
<v Speaker 1>These are classic movies that you just need to see,

0:12:49.400 --> 0:12:52.320
<v Speaker 1>like just as a person growing up in America, like

0:12:52.480 --> 0:12:54.880
<v Speaker 1>and yeah, if you were like you or whatever when

0:12:54.880 --> 0:12:58.400
<v Speaker 1>they came out, then like go rent them or whatever.

0:12:58.559 --> 0:13:01.800
<v Speaker 1>And watch them. Are you really this fired up about it? Evan?

0:13:02.360 --> 0:13:05.120
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I'm fired. But who doesn't go back to

0:13:05.160 --> 0:13:08.160
<v Speaker 1>the future. Probably a lot of people. I mean, I'm

0:13:08.200 --> 0:13:12.480
<v Speaker 1>married to one. Actually, yeah, he has. He literally every

0:13:12.520 --> 0:13:14.960
<v Speaker 1>pop culture references lost to my husband. And guess what,

0:13:15.120 --> 0:13:18.200
<v Speaker 1>I can still I can still love him. I'm sure

0:13:18.200 --> 0:13:21.040
<v Speaker 1>it really bugs you, doesn't it. It doesn't at all,

0:13:21.360 --> 0:13:23.480
<v Speaker 1>But he does miss a lot of jokes because of it.

0:13:23.520 --> 0:13:27.560
<v Speaker 1>I will say that when are you still there? This

0:13:27.640 --> 0:13:30.440
<v Speaker 1>is just so ridiculous, Evan. Do you know it was

0:13:30.520 --> 0:13:33.319
<v Speaker 1>actually a date? You know, and you really weren't treating

0:13:33.360 --> 0:13:36.440
<v Speaker 1>me right. So a little advice to your future dates.

0:13:36.600 --> 0:13:39.679
<v Speaker 1>Don't be so judgmental. If somebody doesn't remember or no

0:13:39.960 --> 0:13:43.359
<v Speaker 1>of all the movies in your arsenal that you insist

0:13:43.440 --> 0:13:45.760
<v Speaker 1>that they know in order to be an American. I mean,

0:13:45.800 --> 0:13:48.760
<v Speaker 1>it's crazy. It's not like all of them, but those

0:13:48.840 --> 0:13:51.560
<v Speaker 1>are in anybody's basic Oh my god, I gotta go.

0:13:51.720 --> 0:13:53.679
<v Speaker 1>I don't want to talk to you. I don't care

0:13:53.679 --> 0:13:57.800
<v Speaker 1>about your damn movies and whoever karates and police movies

0:13:57.840 --> 0:14:01.000
<v Speaker 1>and whatever the hell it is? All right, this one question?

0:14:01.120 --> 0:14:06.640
<v Speaker 1>Tell me you've seen Home alone? No, I haven't. Oh

0:14:06.640 --> 0:14:21.640
<v Speaker 1>my god, what's the Macauley culture? Okay, Evan, I'm out.

0:14:23.640 --> 0:14:28.400
<v Speaker 1>You're living a broken life, Vanessa. I love Vanessa. Did

0:14:28.440 --> 0:14:32.920
<v Speaker 1>you hang up? Yeah? Evan? Are you still there or

0:14:32.920 --> 0:14:35.880
<v Speaker 1>did you hang up to now? Are you pissing? I'm here, man? Yeah,

0:14:36.280 --> 0:14:38.080
<v Speaker 1>well Evan, I have to ask anyway, Even though she

0:14:38.200 --> 0:14:39.600
<v Speaker 1>hung up, Vanessa, would you like to go on a

0:14:39.640 --> 0:14:42.120
<v Speaker 1>second date with Evan? We will pay for it? No,

0:14:42.280 --> 0:14:44.960
<v Speaker 1>thank you, sir, Sorry Evan, she said, no, bab you

0:14:44.960 --> 0:14:47.920
<v Speaker 1>didn't hear that. Well, fine, I don't want to go

0:14:47.960 --> 0:14:53.120
<v Speaker 1>out with you anyway. You shut in. I'm so sorry

0:14:53.120 --> 0:14:58.000
<v Speaker 1>you had to go out with that psycho. Yeah no, right, dude, Evan,

0:14:58.080 --> 0:15:01.440
<v Speaker 1>Why wouldn't you use that as like an opening to say, hey,

0:15:01.680 --> 0:15:03.600
<v Speaker 1>that's awesome. You haven't seen those I can watch it

0:15:03.720 --> 0:15:07.640
<v Speaker 1>with you next time. I mean, I just I started

0:15:07.640 --> 0:15:10.680
<v Speaker 1>out that way, but after like the first one or

0:15:10.720 --> 0:15:14.280
<v Speaker 1>two where she was like, yeah, I don't know about that.

0:15:14.640 --> 0:15:17.640
<v Speaker 1>Weren't the eighties a long time ago? Like just that crap,

0:15:17.800 --> 0:15:23.960
<v Speaker 1>Like it just fired me up. Man, I can tell

0:15:24.200 --> 0:15:26.560
<v Speaker 1>you don't know those movies. That's like the same as

0:15:26.640 --> 0:15:28.760
<v Speaker 1>not knowing that Bill Clinton was president and that he

0:15:28.760 --> 0:15:33.760
<v Speaker 1>got in the office, blame to me that you don't

0:15:33.760 --> 0:15:37.680
<v Speaker 1>know that Wait what that happened? Evin had no idea.

0:15:40.240 --> 0:15:42.440
<v Speaker 1>In the morning, the text message in at seven eight

0:15:42.440 --> 0:15:44.120
<v Speaker 1>five nine too, it says it blows me away that

0:15:44.200 --> 0:15:46.360
<v Speaker 1>eating a fly wasn't the worst thing that dude did

0:15:46.400 --> 0:15:48.920
<v Speaker 1>on his date. Seriously broken Jewil in the morning talking

0:15:48.960 --> 0:15:51.040
<v Speaker 1>about today's second date update. If you missed it, this guy,

0:15:51.080 --> 0:15:54.560
<v Speaker 1>Evan tried to make his date Vanessa laugh by pretending

0:15:54.600 --> 0:15:56.360
<v Speaker 1>to chomp at a fly as it was buzzing around

0:15:56.400 --> 0:15:58.720
<v Speaker 1>their table, and he accidentally caught it with his teeth

0:15:58.760 --> 0:16:01.480
<v Speaker 1>and then bit it in half. And when we call Vanessa,

0:16:01.560 --> 0:16:04.880
<v Speaker 1>she told us that Evan shamed her for not understanding

0:16:04.880 --> 0:16:06.880
<v Speaker 1>a joke that he made about mister Miyagi because there's

0:16:06.920 --> 0:16:08.600
<v Speaker 1>a catching a fly thing in the Karate Kid, if

0:16:08.600 --> 0:16:11.760
<v Speaker 1>you've ever seen that movie. And he was upset and

0:16:11.840 --> 0:16:14.400
<v Speaker 1>he said that she's ridiculous because she's never seen Karate

0:16:14.520 --> 0:16:16.840
<v Speaker 1>Kid and a few other popular eighties films. He was

0:16:16.960 --> 0:16:21.240
<v Speaker 1>very upset about it, and there was no second date. Yeah,

0:16:21.280 --> 0:16:23.400
<v Speaker 1>I mean he just needs to find another movie lover,

0:16:23.560 --> 0:16:25.760
<v Speaker 1>I think yeah, I think so. Remember, if you want

0:16:25.760 --> 0:16:27.360
<v Speaker 1>to do a second day update. Just email the show

0:16:27.400 --> 0:16:29.280
<v Speaker 1>and we will call the person who didn't call you

0:16:29.320 --> 0:16:31.480
<v Speaker 1>back ninety two point five