WEBVTT - FLAME MONROE - Succotash 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:03.280 Hmmm, y'all had all the booby. 0:00:04.440 --> 0:00:07.400 I ain't got I don't have boobs, so I got them. 0:00:07.520 --> 0:00:09.039 I had them for like three seconds when I had 0:00:09.039 --> 0:00:09.440 a baby. 0:00:09.560 --> 0:00:13.400 I borral man. They alone, They going back. 0:00:14.680 --> 0:00:17.600 Welcome to another episode of Eating While Broke. I'm your host, 0:00:17.600 --> 0:00:20.800 Coleen Wit and today we have Emmy nominated flaming role 0:00:20.800 --> 0:00:29.040 in the building comedian, actress, writer, entertainer, podcaster. Also, what's 0:00:29.160 --> 0:00:32.199 what's the name of your podcast? Learn? You guys could 0:00:32.280 --> 0:00:35.320 check her out on the Black Effects. So today what 0:00:35.400 --> 0:00:36.240 do you have us eating? 0:00:37.360 --> 0:00:39.520 She forgot dad, mom, brother. 0:00:43.240 --> 0:00:45.960 It's sad because I did leave that out on purpose. 0:00:46.000 --> 0:00:48.360 But then no, that is probably the hardest title, right 0:00:48.520 --> 0:00:49.520 that is that is. 0:00:49.440 --> 0:00:51.920 The hardest, the most joyful, and the most pain. 0:00:51.840 --> 0:00:53.280 And how many kids you? 0:00:53.320 --> 0:01:00.360 Three? Three? He wasn't playing just wait, I wouldn't with 0:01:00.760 --> 0:01:05.520 tight with it out mistakes, not at all. Thank you 0:01:05.560 --> 0:01:09.679 for having me. Hello everyone, eating Eating Broken. You know 0:01:09.720 --> 0:01:11.160 what we're gonna have? This is what I ate when 0:01:11.160 --> 0:01:11.720 I was broken. 0:01:11.720 --> 0:01:14.320 Scutas suckutash is a poor man's meal, but it will 0:01:14.319 --> 0:01:14.880 feel you up. 0:01:14.920 --> 0:01:17.039 How do you how do you spell that sucker tash? 0:01:17.319 --> 0:01:23.120 Now you asked me some difficult questions, sucker tash. So 0:01:23.160 --> 0:01:26.520 I'm thinking it's s U C c A T t 0:01:26.600 --> 0:01:27.880 A s h. 0:01:28.160 --> 0:01:29.720 I think did you make it up? 0:01:30.160 --> 0:01:30.240 No? 0:01:30.360 --> 0:01:32.920 Absolutely not. My grandmother May used to make this all 0:01:32.959 --> 0:01:34.600 the time. It was a bunch of us, so she 0:01:34.760 --> 0:01:36.240 had to stretch it out. 0:01:36.440 --> 0:01:38.040 Okay, so what are the ingredients? 0:01:38.080 --> 0:01:43.319 So the ingredients actually is our whole curnel of corn cutokra, 0:01:43.319 --> 0:01:47.720 a tomato, onion, green pepper, celery, and whatever season you 0:01:47.840 --> 0:01:50.800 season to taste however you want. And usually bacon. I 0:01:50.800 --> 0:01:52.280 don't see the bacon up here, and you put it 0:01:52.320 --> 0:01:53.120 over a bit of rice. 0:01:53.360 --> 0:01:54.560 We do have bacon, and you. 0:01:54.520 --> 0:01:58.960 Can imagine feeding about nine kids screaming and it will fill. 0:01:59.240 --> 0:02:01.040 And it was healthy because it was ventance. 0:02:24.720 --> 0:02:27.280 Oh yeah, because I saw Okrah. And when I saw Oprah, 0:02:27.280 --> 0:02:27.880 I said. 0:02:28.120 --> 0:02:33.360 Oh heck no. I'll tell you about okrah. 0:02:33.639 --> 0:02:36.919 Y'all young kids say macaroni and cheese. Let us all 0:02:37.000 --> 0:02:39.000 here say Okrah. I'm gonna let you sit on there 0:02:39.040 --> 0:02:41.600 and think about that for a minute. 0:02:41.760 --> 0:02:45.240 Something. You have to be very good at cooking. I'm 0:02:45.240 --> 0:02:47.240 gonna tell you a little story. Okay. My mom is 0:02:47.320 --> 0:02:49.680 Jamaican and she would do the whole Okrah thing. It's 0:02:49.800 --> 0:02:52.320 my mama was a great cook. But me and my 0:02:52.360 --> 0:02:55.080 siblings would band together that every time the Okrah rent 0:02:55.200 --> 0:02:57.160 like came to the front of the freezer, it was 0:02:57.200 --> 0:02:59.280 like someone's job to go and hide it to the 0:02:59.320 --> 0:03:01.480 back of the freezer. And that was the job of 0:03:01.639 --> 0:03:04.200 us kids, was just to hide the Oprah and she 0:03:04.200 --> 0:03:04.880 would never find it. 0:03:05.120 --> 0:03:06.760 Okay, it's pretty tasteless though. 0:03:06.760 --> 0:03:11.760 It really is flimey though well, and then okay, and 0:03:11.800 --> 0:03:16.240 then I was in North Carolina with Nick Cannon and blimey. 0:03:19.840 --> 0:03:20.200 I was. 0:03:20.280 --> 0:03:22.200 I was out there and I had told him like, 0:03:22.240 --> 0:03:23.800 I really hate Okra and he was like, you ain't 0:03:23.800 --> 0:03:26.840 never had fried Okra? And I said, okay, you know, 0:03:26.840 --> 0:03:29.120 I'll take one for the team. And I still hated it, 0:03:29.160 --> 0:03:32.640 So I can't mess with Okra. So I'm going to 0:03:32.800 --> 0:03:36.200 gracefully take this one for the team for eating while broke. 0:03:36.760 --> 0:03:39.080 But we do have bacon. Do you want me to 0:03:39.200 --> 0:03:40.240 like bacon? 0:03:40.480 --> 0:03:42.160 Yes? Please? Because bacon is the starter. 0:03:42.520 --> 0:03:44.800 All right, So we're now back, So we have your 0:03:44.800 --> 0:03:47.720 apple with bacon, all right, So let's get the cooking. 0:03:48.360 --> 0:03:51.240 Let me drop a little olive oil here, saying, oh, 0:03:51.280 --> 0:03:52.960 I brought you a gift before I get started. 0:03:53.000 --> 0:03:53.880 I brought you a fan. 0:03:54.400 --> 0:03:56.080 Okay, what is your face? I want to see you 0:03:56.120 --> 0:04:00.960 pop it too? Here we go, Hey, what is that? 0:04:01.000 --> 0:04:01.480 What is that? 0:04:02.000 --> 0:04:03.800 Can't bitch do what I do? 0:04:04.360 --> 0:04:04.960 I believe it. 0:04:05.960 --> 0:04:07.840 This is this is the this is gonna be the 0:04:07.840 --> 0:04:08.920 model for the rest of my life. 0:04:08.960 --> 0:04:12.080 Everybody mindset is what he's she we That is my 0:04:12.160 --> 0:04:15.160 own preferred pronoun. He's wet because I pretty much feel 0:04:15.160 --> 0:04:16.760 like they kick me out the community. I got my 0:04:16.800 --> 0:04:19.480 own pronoun. Man stands for he cast the check, she 0:04:19.560 --> 0:04:21.560 make the money. We spent the same person saying the 0:04:21.600 --> 0:04:22.119 same person? 0:04:22.200 --> 0:04:23.919 Is I like that? I like that? 0:04:24.520 --> 0:04:25.880 I cover all the bases? 0:04:28.040 --> 0:04:28.480 Is that you? 0:04:28.839 --> 0:04:29.440 That is me? 0:04:29.680 --> 0:04:30.080 Okay? 0:04:30.240 --> 0:04:33.160 And in my sexty day, I was. 0:04:33.200 --> 0:04:38.040 Young, So you started out. So let's kind of take 0:04:38.080 --> 0:04:42.800 it back to you call it succotash circuit circuitans. So 0:04:43.040 --> 0:04:46.240 what was going on in the era of sutash. 0:04:46.320 --> 0:04:48.400 We were living in the projects of Chicago on the 0:04:48.400 --> 0:04:50.960 West Side and hearing horn the projects. My grandmother Big 0:04:51.000 --> 0:04:54.159 jip That's what everybody called my grandmother, Big Jipu. She 0:04:54.360 --> 0:04:59.720 was my grandmother ran guns, so candy, uh so women 0:05:00.360 --> 0:05:01.400 so drugs. 0:05:01.320 --> 0:05:03.240 This was the gains of other. 0:05:03.200 --> 0:05:05.480 Projects, and it was a bunch of grandkids. She had 0:05:05.480 --> 0:05:08.039 a bunch of grandkids, so she had to stretch food 0:05:08.080 --> 0:05:09.880 out in between when it was high and low. 0:05:09.960 --> 0:05:11.800 My grandma was a blu leg My grandmother is a pimp. 0:05:11.920 --> 0:05:13.479 I love my grandmother. May she rest in peace. 0:05:13.800 --> 0:05:14.880 And she raised you. 0:05:15.240 --> 0:05:17.520 She pretty much raised my mama. Was bucked while my 0:05:17.560 --> 0:05:20.080 mom was out doing her thing. My mother was seventeen 0:05:20.120 --> 0:05:22.560 when she had me, so she was a kid. And 0:05:22.600 --> 0:05:24.719 I didn't understand that when I was a kid, But 0:05:24.760 --> 0:05:28.120 now that I have my own children, I get. I 0:05:28.120 --> 0:05:31.280 couldn't imagine my daughter, who's nineteen, having a baby now 0:05:31.360 --> 0:05:34.360 because she's not responsible at all. So I can only 0:05:34.360 --> 0:05:37.360 imagine what Valerie was like. That's my mother, Valerie. So 0:05:37.400 --> 0:05:40.080 my grandmother stepped up, you know, and a lot of 0:05:41.320 --> 0:05:45.359 black grandmother's back then, not only just black. I'm weller, 0:05:45.960 --> 0:05:47.520 that is how you say it in Spanish. 0:05:47.720 --> 0:05:49.279 Well I have no idea. 0:05:49.320 --> 0:05:53.600 Oh well, you look like I'm so well. 0:05:53.600 --> 0:05:55.719 Anyway, a lot of grandmothers had to step up to 0:05:55.760 --> 0:05:58.880 help raise the grandkids because the moms were young, or 0:05:58.960 --> 0:06:01.560 they were working, they were trying to better themselves, to 0:06:01.560 --> 0:06:03.400 make a better life. So my grandmother stepped up and 0:06:03.400 --> 0:06:05.240 it was but I was the first grand baby. I 0:06:05.320 --> 0:06:07.440 was the most spoiled, and I was the most loved. 0:06:08.240 --> 0:06:11.000 I hope my other my other siblings don't hear that. 0:06:11.960 --> 0:06:16.080 I guarantee you and you'll get that random phone call. 0:06:16.279 --> 0:06:19.560 So this was the signature edition Grandma's house. 0:06:19.560 --> 0:06:22.000 This was the poor man's meal when money was tight 0:06:22.200 --> 0:06:23.800 and we knew money was this how we But she 0:06:23.800 --> 0:06:26.000 would always like fry a big thing of chicken wings. 0:06:26.120 --> 0:06:28.920 Chicken wings was dirt cheap back then. Good guy, you. 0:06:28.839 --> 0:06:30.560 Could get a whole bag of chicken wings and feed 0:06:30.560 --> 0:06:32.000 the family of twelve for fat dollars. 0:06:32.000 --> 0:06:33.880 Fat dollars, my bag. You want chicken wing needs to 0:06:33.920 --> 0:06:34.800 go around? Good God. 0:06:35.480 --> 0:06:40.000 Yesterday's prices, Yeah, yesterday's prices. So you grew up with 0:06:40.040 --> 0:06:43.000 your grandmother. How did you get into comedy? How did 0:06:43.040 --> 0:06:44.039 you get into the entertainment? 0:06:44.120 --> 0:06:44.200 Like? 0:06:44.200 --> 0:06:45.400 What was that first step? 0:06:46.040 --> 0:06:48.720 Well? I never I could not sing, I couldn't dance. 0:06:48.760 --> 0:06:50.440 Well, what a lot of people don't know about me 0:06:50.560 --> 0:06:53.360 is that when I graduated high school, I graduated CVS 0:06:53.440 --> 0:06:54.320 High School in Chicago. 0:06:54.320 --> 0:06:56.719 I had a four year music scholarship to the Cookman. 0:06:56.760 --> 0:06:57.479 I played the obo. 0:06:57.720 --> 0:07:00.760 I was in All City Orchestra and man, I almost 0:07:00.800 --> 0:07:02.800 set first chair to us at second chair. 0:07:03.160 --> 0:07:04.599 What instrument the obo? 0:07:05.560 --> 0:07:06.720 I don't even know what that is. 0:07:06.760 --> 0:07:08.400 It's a double ree instrument. I was. 0:07:08.440 --> 0:07:11.840 I was masterful at it. My teacher, mister Harold Anthony Bradman, 0:07:11.880 --> 0:07:15.240 he rest in peace, just was a teacher that was 0:07:15.320 --> 0:07:18.200 diligent and the things that he got away with as 0:07:18.240 --> 0:07:20.480 a teacher back then he would be under the jail 0:07:20.520 --> 0:07:25.320 with now. But it instilled such a drive in us, 0:07:25.360 --> 0:07:28.240 and we wanted to make him plou proud. We wanted 0:07:28.280 --> 0:07:31.320 to please him because we could see the smile of 0:07:31.360 --> 0:07:33.200 pride on his face when we did a great job. 0:07:33.200 --> 0:07:35.240 I don't I think that's what's missing with teaching now. 0:07:35.440 --> 0:07:37.600 The teachers, a lot of teachers, not all, because it's 0:07:37.640 --> 0:07:40.280 still some great teachers out here, don't want the children 0:07:40.360 --> 0:07:43.200 to show pride. You show the pride the kid makes 0:07:43.240 --> 0:07:45.440 you proud. It makes the kid a better kid. To 0:07:45.480 --> 0:07:48.640 me life, it's too soft to now everybody get a ward. 0:07:48.720 --> 0:07:50.720 Oh everybody didn't get a war. When I was a kid. 0:07:50.760 --> 0:07:53.200 If you didn't do well, you got okay, we'll see 0:07:53.200 --> 0:07:56.480 you next time. It made you thrive to do better 0:07:56.560 --> 0:07:58.880 and be better to all these kids and everybody. Get 0:07:58.880 --> 0:07:59.200 a ward. 0:07:59.280 --> 0:08:01.640 Little Johnny, it's not deserve board. He was too slow. 0:08:03.200 --> 0:08:04.960 Okay, so yeah, that's low heat. 0:08:05.040 --> 0:08:06.440 I got it on low heat. Let me. 0:08:06.760 --> 0:08:09.120 I ain't got my real glasses on the girl. I 0:08:09.120 --> 0:08:10.360 can't even see you right now. 0:08:10.480 --> 0:08:13.320 You know, when you get old like hair. 0:08:13.120 --> 0:08:16.120 I'll put it on four. Yeah, there you're good. 0:08:16.440 --> 0:08:17.880 I was gonna see you don't even want you don't 0:08:17.880 --> 0:08:20.240 even cook? Girl. What's the name of this show? Oh? 0:08:20.480 --> 0:08:24.080 Cook? I thought sleep on me? 0:08:24.120 --> 0:08:24.360 Guys. 0:08:24.400 --> 0:08:25.720 So what you do is you saw you get to 0:08:25.720 --> 0:08:27.560 bake it heated up, and then you start start tearing 0:08:27.600 --> 0:08:30.320 the onions and bell pepper and celery with it as 0:08:30.400 --> 0:08:32.520 it heats up, because then you get all the flavors going. 0:08:32.559 --> 0:08:34.880 And then you season the veggies and the meat while 0:08:34.880 --> 0:08:36.839 they're in there, and you add the corn and the 0:08:37.160 --> 0:08:41.040 the tomatoes and the celery, I mean the okra last, 0:08:41.080 --> 0:08:43.880 because the okra takes no time. It's just pretty much steamed. 0:08:44.040 --> 0:08:46.160 Now, is there a reason why you went my frozen 0:08:46.480 --> 0:08:47.720 corn and frozen okra? 0:08:48.280 --> 0:08:50.360 Because it's quick and I got three kids not being 0:08:50.360 --> 0:08:53.400 a hurry. But when you got time, you got time 0:08:53.440 --> 0:08:56.199 to shut the corn and roll with tomato. Get cut 0:08:56.280 --> 0:08:57.520 into dice the tomatoes up. 0:08:57.559 --> 0:08:59.680 I ain't got time for that girl. Three kids, you know, 0:08:59.720 --> 0:09:01.720 two of the same age and they're not twins. 0:09:01.960 --> 0:09:04.600 How oh, never mind, just. 0:09:10.520 --> 0:09:12.080 You forget already. 0:09:13.640 --> 0:09:17.559 I got olds at the same time, two different. 0:09:17.240 --> 0:09:18.840 And both my baby mama's named Tasha. 0:09:19.679 --> 0:09:22.719 I know someone that their baby mama's one named the 0:09:22.840 --> 0:09:25.640 kid Aja and the other one named the kid a. 0:09:27.480 --> 0:09:29.320 And I was like, two different baby mamas. 0:09:29.440 --> 0:09:31.959 Yes, I said, they must have been beefing, but your 0:09:31.960 --> 0:09:36.200 baby mama's got along well it well, probably not. 0:09:36.520 --> 0:09:37.360 Know each other like that. 0:09:37.400 --> 0:09:39.640 But both of their names was Tasha, but their names 0:09:39.640 --> 0:09:40.960 weren't Tasha when I met them. 0:09:41.200 --> 0:09:43.800 See, both my baby mamas are very masculine. 0:09:43.320 --> 0:09:46.040 Stood girls like so that you know, we all come 0:09:46.120 --> 0:09:46.800 up with our own name. 0:09:46.840 --> 0:09:48.319 I'm flaying that ain't my legal name. 0:09:48.840 --> 0:09:53.120 So I didn't know they was Tasha's until after the 0:09:53.160 --> 0:09:54.400 deed had been done. 0:09:55.240 --> 0:09:59.760 Wow. Wow, So you and all your baby mamas get 0:09:59.760 --> 0:10:00.560 along with. 0:10:00.679 --> 0:10:03.360 My son's mom who my first born, my son, Jamaicas, 0:10:03.400 --> 0:10:06.880 His mom passed last year from diabetes. But my other 0:10:07.120 --> 0:10:10.600 my daughter's mom two daughters. Yeah we cool, We okay, 0:10:11.160 --> 0:10:14.600 that's the truth. Okay, we're okay, And I can say 0:10:14.600 --> 0:10:16.800 that now because there was a time I couldn't say that. 0:10:17.760 --> 0:10:20.520 There was a time we were feuding and bitter because 0:10:20.559 --> 0:10:23.520 I got full custyer other kids the entire time. But 0:10:23.559 --> 0:10:24.920 that's not what we were feuding about. 0:10:25.240 --> 0:10:26.520 Okay, were you a young mom? 0:10:27.360 --> 0:10:30.400 I mean I was thirty seven when I had my 0:10:30.400 --> 0:10:31.000 first baby. 0:10:31.440 --> 0:10:32.800 Oh okay, you like me? 0:10:33.559 --> 0:10:37.720 I was, you know, because I watched my mother, my aunties, 0:10:38.160 --> 0:10:42.439 who all had children young, lose their lives. Not lose 0:10:42.800 --> 0:10:45.520 like they died, but they were never able to live 0:10:45.600 --> 0:10:48.400 and thrive. So I knew I wanted a family of 0:10:48.400 --> 0:10:51.199 my own, but I wanted to be flaming roofus as 0:10:51.240 --> 0:10:53.000 long as I could before I did that. 0:10:53.040 --> 0:10:54.960 So I was so. You know, a lot of people 0:10:55.040 --> 0:10:56.360 go when they get older. 0:10:56.040 --> 0:10:58.559 They say, oh, I'm reliving my childhood. There's no need 0:10:58.559 --> 0:10:59.800 for me to relive my childhood. 0:10:59.800 --> 0:11:00.360 I did. 0:11:00.440 --> 0:11:02.240 I was playing my whole twenties. I didn't have a 0:11:02.240 --> 0:11:04.800 baby to thirty seven, so I was allowed to be met. 0:11:05.200 --> 0:11:07.000 But I am ready to be an empty nester again. 0:11:07.400 --> 0:11:09.000 Yeah, oh your kids still live with you? 0:11:09.160 --> 0:11:15.600 Hell? Yeah? What? Your pandemic slowed everything? Down, including them. 0:11:15.920 --> 0:11:19.680 So your kids grew up Now I'm gonna go a 0:11:19.679 --> 0:11:21.480 little deep with it. So your kids grew up in 0:11:21.480 --> 0:11:27.760 an environment having a situation that's not traditional I guess 0:11:27.800 --> 0:11:30.000 in the world sense when they were going through it, 0:11:30.000 --> 0:11:32.760 like cause right now we're in a world where trans 0:11:32.840 --> 0:11:36.360 and all all this is like it's actually almost in 0:11:36.480 --> 0:11:39.720 everything you turn on. You turn on the TV, commercials, movies, whatever. 0:11:40.400 --> 0:11:42.840 But your kids grew up in an era where that 0:11:43.040 --> 0:11:43.600 wasn't the norm. 0:11:43.679 --> 0:11:45.440 Right, Well, I don't know if it was an era. 0:11:45.559 --> 0:11:47.400 You're not only twenty. They just grew up in the 0:11:47.440 --> 0:11:51.400 house with me, you know. And will I say that 0:11:51.440 --> 0:11:54.959 we grew up together? Probably yes, you know, even though 0:11:55.000 --> 0:11:56.960 that I was thirty seven, I never had kids, but 0:11:57.160 --> 0:11:59.880 I had a baby brother that I raised, so it 0:12:00.160 --> 0:12:02.120 wasn't like I was, you know, new to its just 0:12:02.160 --> 0:12:03.880 having my own. And then I thought that me and 0:12:03.960 --> 0:12:06.800 my my daughter's mom were going to be married and 0:12:06.880 --> 0:12:10.319 be together and be in love. And because I love 0:12:10.360 --> 0:12:13.360 that woman with everything in me, but she didn't love 0:12:13.400 --> 0:12:16.240 me back. I realized after the fact that I had 0:12:16.280 --> 0:12:18.240 two children with somebody who never loved me. 0:12:19.360 --> 0:12:20.719 You had two children. 0:12:20.400 --> 0:12:24.000 With somebody who never loved me, how do you figure that? 0:12:24.240 --> 0:12:26.280 Well, you know, you don't figure it while you're in it, 0:12:26.320 --> 0:12:28.800 because love is blind, and you take way more than 0:12:28.840 --> 0:12:29.319 you should. 0:12:29.840 --> 0:12:30.600 That's anybody. 0:12:30.800 --> 0:12:31.240 Yeah. 0:12:31.280 --> 0:12:33.480 But when I got out of it and I realized 0:12:33.800 --> 0:12:36.400 the things that she could say to me, and I 0:12:36.440 --> 0:12:39.480 think that didn't say Dick could say to me what 0:12:39.640 --> 0:12:42.680 she did, I realized this person never loved me. You 0:12:42.679 --> 0:12:44.679 know a lot of us put love and all this 0:12:44.840 --> 0:12:47.200 emphasis on love and oh they love me, and you 0:12:47.280 --> 0:12:49.200 take abuse, and it don't always have to be a 0:12:49.200 --> 0:12:53.120 physical abuse, it really does. Mental abuse is to me 0:12:53.280 --> 0:12:57.199 is way more damaging because you can't the pain don't stop. 0:12:57.320 --> 0:12:59.160 You hit me in my arm. That pain gon hurt 0:12:59.200 --> 0:13:02.280 now gonna eventually go away, But them words that cut 0:13:02.280 --> 0:13:04.480 the scars of your heart don't never go away. That's 0:13:04.480 --> 0:13:06.040 why I tell people all the time, I'm not afraid 0:13:06.080 --> 0:13:08.120 of a new love. I'm a picturepad of that old 0:13:08.160 --> 0:13:10.640 hurt because I loved this woman with everything in me. 0:13:11.080 --> 0:13:13.160 But it just didn't work. But I did get cussy 0:13:13.200 --> 0:13:15.760 other kids. I was happy, and we had and the 0:13:15.840 --> 0:13:17.960 kids still talk to her. They always have talking. I 0:13:18.000 --> 0:13:19.200 never stopped them from talking. 0:13:19.000 --> 0:13:23.840 To Okay, okay, perfect, So you you're going to school 0:13:24.480 --> 0:13:29.360 for music, how do you transition from there? 0:13:30.120 --> 0:13:32.360 So let me tell you when I went to so 0:13:32.840 --> 0:13:35.360 because I'm from the c Chicago. I'm from Chicago. And 0:13:35.400 --> 0:13:36.800 if I was speaking like I got a list, I 0:13:36.840 --> 0:13:38.800 got five screws in my mouth right now. So I'm 0:13:38.800 --> 0:13:41.920 getting into implants. I'm in the process of process, and 0:13:42.000 --> 0:13:45.760 so I'm speaking weird to me. But I was born 0:13:45.760 --> 0:13:47.680 and raised on the West Side. I was educated on 0:13:47.720 --> 0:13:50.120 the South Side. I came out on the North Side, 0:13:50.120 --> 0:13:52.240 but I did my best work on the East Side. 0:13:54.240 --> 0:13:55.280 That's me being koy. 0:13:57.679 --> 0:13:59.760 I didn't even know I wanted to play music. I 0:14:00.760 --> 0:14:03.079 went there was a in the band in CBS High 0:14:03.080 --> 0:14:04.800 School band. The years that we were there, I'm not 0:14:04.800 --> 0:14:07.520 going to tell you all the years do the manu. 0:14:08.000 --> 0:14:10.160 We were the number one band in the country. We 0:14:10.160 --> 0:14:13.080 were invited to d C and everywhere to play because 0:14:13.200 --> 0:14:16.600 I band director Harold Bray was such a fantastic teacher 0:14:17.360 --> 0:14:19.880 and I went into it was called the be Have. 0:14:20.040 --> 0:14:21.720 I went in one day. I was really really short 0:14:21.720 --> 0:14:23.320 that in high school until I came a junior, I 0:14:23.360 --> 0:14:25.080 was only like fort eleven OAU. 0:14:25.200 --> 0:14:26.760 Right now, you're what you're like? You got to be 0:14:26.800 --> 0:14:29.600 like six. No, no, no, I'm only five, only five eight. 0:14:29.520 --> 0:14:30.080 I'm only five. 0:14:30.080 --> 0:14:33.800 A look, I just have a big princi I'm sure, 0:14:34.400 --> 0:14:36.360 and I wear really high heels on stage because I 0:14:36.400 --> 0:14:38.440 want to be really tall. I envy tall people. That's 0:14:38.480 --> 0:14:40.240 what I always wanted to be. I always wanted to 0:14:40.280 --> 0:14:42.360 be tall. Everybody thinks I'm really tall. I just got 0:14:42.400 --> 0:14:49.520 a big ass mouth and a big you know shape. Oh, 0:14:49.680 --> 0:14:51.920 let me stick keep starting my food and uh. I 0:14:51.960 --> 0:14:54.720 went in and I just joined the band. 0:14:54.720 --> 0:14:57.080 And it gave me because I didn't have a dad 0:14:57.080 --> 0:14:57.440 at home. 0:14:57.480 --> 0:14:59.400 My mom was on drugs for such a long time, 0:14:59.600 --> 0:15:03.480 and gave me a family that was my first outside 0:15:03.520 --> 0:15:05.400 of my real friend because my uncles and I were 0:15:05.400 --> 0:15:08.760 gangsters and my aunties was out doing anything. So it 0:15:08.840 --> 0:15:11.200 gave me a sense of family and community. So I 0:15:11.320 --> 0:15:14.080 was like, it was God dignos exactly what he's doing. 0:15:14.240 --> 0:15:16.680 Whenever you think you're wrong or you're on the wrong 0:15:16.760 --> 0:15:18.560 path of things ain't going the way you want him 0:15:18.560 --> 0:15:20.600 to go. I promise you he know what he's doing, 0:15:20.640 --> 0:15:23.000 and when you get to where he wants you to 0:15:23.040 --> 0:15:26.200 get to, he's going to let it all reveal itself 0:15:26.240 --> 0:15:28.960 to you. That I did it this way for this reason. 0:15:29.520 --> 0:15:31.920 Like you'll have an aha moment, Yeah, like. 0:15:32.080 --> 0:15:34.440 Why did I join the band? And then way out 0:15:34.520 --> 0:15:37.280 later I'm like, wow, that was a great experience. Then 0:15:37.480 --> 0:15:39.520 you know, so it was out he always knows what 0:15:39.520 --> 0:15:39.880 he's doing. 0:15:40.200 --> 0:15:43.240 I know we questioned it, but so you joined this band. 0:15:43.400 --> 0:15:47.160 Joined the band started off with the saxophone. Then I 0:15:47.240 --> 0:15:49.880 moved to the clarinet, and then I moved to the flute. 0:15:50.160 --> 0:15:53.960 Saxophone was my first joy, I thought, so was the clarinet, 0:15:54.000 --> 0:15:56.440 and then the food I was really good at. But 0:15:56.520 --> 0:15:59.440 then Harold Brace say, Marcus, that's how it used to 0:15:59.480 --> 0:16:02.040 call my name. I want you to try to oboe. 0:16:02.080 --> 0:16:04.120 It's because you're a good reader of music. Because I 0:16:04.120 --> 0:16:07.200 could read the music really quickly, and I hated to 0:16:07.200 --> 0:16:07.960 think it gave. 0:16:07.760 --> 0:16:09.760 Me a headache. 0:16:09.880 --> 0:16:12.880 I read not only in trouble clip not a base clap, 0:16:13.920 --> 0:16:16.560 because you have to roll your lips in to blow, 0:16:16.640 --> 0:16:17.720 and it was very hard. 0:16:17.760 --> 0:16:19.400 I couldn't roll my lips. I'm like, that hurts. 0:16:19.440 --> 0:16:22.520 But when I got it, it was something about the 0:16:22.960 --> 0:16:26.240 instrument would just soothe me. So whatever drama was going 0:16:26.280 --> 0:16:29.560 on at home, whatever disrespectful names I was being called 0:16:29.680 --> 0:16:32.160 or whatever abuse I was going through in my own house. 0:16:32.640 --> 0:16:37.360 My instrument brought me peace. So that's why I touched it. 0:16:37.400 --> 0:16:38.680 Since I left high school. 0:16:41.040 --> 0:16:44.440 I do have whatever disrespectful names you recalled. 0:16:44.480 --> 0:16:46.640 Oh yeah, my mother was quite abusive. She was. 0:16:46.720 --> 0:16:49.440 My mother was on drugs though, and she my grandmother, 0:16:49.520 --> 0:16:51.640 was abusive to her, from what she tells me. And 0:16:51.720 --> 0:16:54.720 a lot of times we don't understand that, especially when 0:16:54.760 --> 0:16:57.720 it comes to mothers. We don't know what what they 0:16:57.800 --> 0:16:59.640 went through growing up. And when you were a kid, 0:16:59.720 --> 0:17:02.160 you don't give a damn. You want my mom to 0:17:02.200 --> 0:17:04.359 be nice to me. I don't know what your mama 0:17:04.359 --> 0:17:07.160 did to you. Yeah, because I'm too young to understand that. 0:17:07.200 --> 0:17:09.679 But a lot of times parents need to stop thinking 0:17:09.680 --> 0:17:12.920 that these kids don't hear and see everything. Because kids 0:17:12.960 --> 0:17:17.440 here and see everything. Talk to them like their little adults. 0:17:17.480 --> 0:17:19.639 They are one day they will be adults. They're just 0:17:19.680 --> 0:17:22.720 little people. They're not babies. They're little people. Sometimes you 0:17:22.760 --> 0:17:24.080 got to give it to it. And I wish my 0:17:24.119 --> 0:17:26.560 mother would have told me being why she was so 0:17:26.640 --> 0:17:29.600 angry and so hurt and so broken, and then you 0:17:29.640 --> 0:17:31.600 take the shit out on me, you know. But a 0:17:31.640 --> 0:17:33.600 lot of times we don't know, and we don't understand 0:17:33.600 --> 0:17:35.879 that as children until we get older, and some of 0:17:35.960 --> 0:17:38.359 us cannot forgive that. Now me and my mother's relationship 0:17:38.359 --> 0:17:40.520 has been completely repaired. 0:17:40.920 --> 0:17:42.239 Oh okay, yeah we did. 0:17:42.320 --> 0:17:45.000 We both did the work to prepair it. Or did 0:17:45.000 --> 0:17:46.760 you just do a whole lot of forgiving on yourself? 0:17:46.800 --> 0:17:48.639 We both did a lot of forgiving on us. I 0:17:49.160 --> 0:17:51.600 had to talk to my mother to understand why she 0:17:51.760 --> 0:17:55.280