WEBVTT - The Lying Game 0:00:03.800 --> 0:00:06.680 Welcome to stuff to Blow your Mind from how Stuff 0:00:06.680 --> 0:00:13.880 Works dot com. Hey, welcome to stuff to Blow your Mind. 0:00:13.920 --> 0:00:17.439 My name is Robert Lamb and I'm Julie Douglas. Robert, Yes, 0:00:17.920 --> 0:00:19.720 I would I would love for you to do something 0:00:19.800 --> 0:00:21.880 right now, and maybe even listeners to if they're up 0:00:21.960 --> 0:00:24.639 for it. Their hands are free, yeah, I know, not 0:00:24.720 --> 0:00:27.200 if you're driving, or just yeah, or even your dominant hand. 0:00:27.960 --> 0:00:30.720 Could you take your finger from your dominant hand and 0:00:30.880 --> 0:00:36.560 trace a queue on your forehead upper case if you're wondering, okay, 0:00:36.960 --> 0:00:38.760 with just my finger now, with like a sharpie or 0:00:38.760 --> 0:00:40.720 something you can do with the sharper if you want, 0:00:40.760 --> 0:00:43.160 but I wouldn't recommend it. Okay, just unless you want 0:00:43.200 --> 0:00:46.199 some extra flare today. All right, there we go done. Okay. 0:00:46.760 --> 0:00:48.800 What I want to know is the little tail on 0:00:48.840 --> 0:00:52.400 the queue? Which side did you draw it on? Let's 0:00:52.400 --> 0:00:58.880 see it was on the right side. Ah, very revealing. Um. Okay, 0:00:59.000 --> 0:01:01.840 you are apparently not a good liar. Oh okay, I 0:01:01.920 --> 0:01:04.160 know it sounds weird. I mean, I'm sure you're gonna 0:01:04.160 --> 0:01:06.160 explain how this works. But this is this is the 0:01:06.240 --> 0:01:09.800 thing right right side for the little thing on the queue. 0:01:09.920 --> 0:01:12.240 That means I'm a bad liar. But if I had 0:01:12.319 --> 0:01:14.679 not left on you, you would have been impressed by 0:01:15.080 --> 0:01:17.039 I would have been like, okay, if you had drawn 0:01:17.040 --> 0:01:18.560 it on the left, that would have meant that you 0:01:18.560 --> 0:01:21.040 were anticipating the way that it was going to look 0:01:21.080 --> 0:01:24.680 to me. Um. And this is actually the Q test 0:01:25.600 --> 0:01:28.320 from the Guardian article The Truth about lying and Laughing. 0:01:28.640 --> 0:01:31.399 Why isn't this done in job interviews and just you 0:01:31.440 --> 0:01:33.399 know in general, you know, like anytime you meet a 0:01:33.440 --> 0:01:35.640 new person, you should just require that they draw a 0:01:35.720 --> 0:01:38.600 Q on their forehead or everyone be labeled according any 0:01:38.680 --> 0:01:41.080 like the sneeches, because people will get hip to it 0:01:41.120 --> 0:01:44.000 and then they'll start training themselves to to draw it 0:01:44.040 --> 0:01:45.600 on the right or the left every now and then 0:01:45.720 --> 0:01:47.800 and then ends up playing out exactly like the sneeches, 0:01:47.840 --> 0:01:50.640 where everyone has different versions of the queue on their 0:01:50.640 --> 0:01:53.280 head and nobody knows what's white, but for the next 0:01:53.320 --> 0:01:55.760 five minutes it's super secret and you can try it 0:01:55.800 --> 0:01:59.440 on anybody that you know. UM. So it is interesting 0:02:00.120 --> 0:02:04.560 where the person places that tail, because uh, it's a 0:02:04.600 --> 0:02:07.640 really a test of something called self monitoring, and high 0:02:07.640 --> 0:02:10.920 self monitors draw of the letter queue. So, like you said, 0:02:10.919 --> 0:02:12.840 on the on the left so that someone can see it, 0:02:12.960 --> 0:02:15.960 and others on the right and so high. Self monitors 0:02:16.000 --> 0:02:19.160 are concerned with how other people see them, and they 0:02:19.560 --> 0:02:22.480 are usually able to adapt their behavior to suit a 0:02:22.560 --> 0:02:26.080 situation in which they find themselves. And they're skilled at manipulating, 0:02:27.000 --> 0:02:32.560 i e. They're good liars. So what is a lie? Right? 0:02:32.720 --> 0:02:35.320 And we need to get down to it? And and 0:02:35.440 --> 0:02:38.680 this is such a fascinating subject really, I mean, on 0:02:38.720 --> 0:02:41.040 the surface, it doesn't sound so much because the line 0:02:41.240 --> 0:02:44.680 is such an everyday part of our lives. Even if 0:02:44.720 --> 0:02:47.800 you're not a liar or a you know, or or 0:02:47.880 --> 0:02:51.119 someone who just lives and breathes lies, you still kind 0:02:51.120 --> 0:02:53.560 of do It's it's and I think like a great 0:02:53.600 --> 0:02:55.440 example of this and some and people are gonna be 0:02:55.440 --> 0:02:57.880 split on this. But the movie The Invention of Lying 0:02:58.080 --> 0:03:01.799 the Ricky Gervais, I did not see that um has 0:03:02.000 --> 0:03:05.600 you know, immensely talented cast. I'm I'm a big fan 0:03:05.680 --> 0:03:09.240 of stuffers done in the past, but I was really 0:03:09.240 --> 0:03:12.720 disappointed in the film. I felt like it didn't really 0:03:12.760 --> 0:03:15.919 deliver the funny and it didn't really deliver on anything 0:03:16.440 --> 0:03:20.639 all that um mentally amusing either. So do you think 0:03:20.680 --> 0:03:22.640 that it got to the heart of lying, though in 0:03:22.680 --> 0:03:25.359 a way it did through failure. I feel like and 0:03:25.360 --> 0:03:28.160 and and again. I'm sure I've heard people that were like, oh, 0:03:28.160 --> 0:03:31.480 that film was brilliant, but I think the film by 0:03:31.560 --> 0:03:34.040 trying to create a world where there was no lying 0:03:34.400 --> 0:03:36.480 even and then the whole thing is that it's it's 0:03:36.480 --> 0:03:38.480 our world, except there's no lying in it. And then 0:03:38.520 --> 0:03:41.840 one guy accidentally innvinced the lie lying and it becomes 0:03:41.840 --> 0:03:44.080 this big thing. Uh, and again it gives them all 0:03:44.120 --> 0:03:47.800 these powers, but they weren't really like like, you can't 0:03:48.160 --> 0:03:51.520 envision our world without lying, Like everything falls apart, and 0:03:51.600 --> 0:03:54.240 then humor becomes really hard to pull off as well. 0:03:54.880 --> 0:03:58.760 And um, and I think we really have to take 0:03:58.800 --> 0:04:01.640 a step back and look at what lying is and 0:04:01.760 --> 0:04:04.840 just what how powerful a force it is, because I mean, 0:04:04.840 --> 0:04:07.680 we effortlessly lie. Even if you don't lie all that much, 0:04:08.000 --> 0:04:12.040 it's really easy to roll one off. But I really 0:04:12.120 --> 0:04:14.400 encourage everyone in this podcast to take a step back 0:04:14.520 --> 0:04:17.440 and really think of it in different terms. Well, I 0:04:17.480 --> 0:04:20.880 think most people think of it in a negative light, right, 0:04:20.920 --> 0:04:24.080 because it's not good to lie, right and normally normally, 0:04:24.120 --> 0:04:26.080 but I think what we're going to explore is when 0:04:26.120 --> 0:04:28.480 it is good and why it's actually necessary to our 0:04:28.600 --> 0:04:31.200 very existence. Yeah, so yes, so indeed, let's first get 0:04:31.279 --> 0:04:33.200 rid of the whole. I mean, we almost need a 0:04:33.200 --> 0:04:38.200 different word for it, um and different words being economical 0:04:38.279 --> 0:04:41.599 with the truth. Yeah, but that kind of feels like 0:04:41.600 --> 0:04:44.960 a lie in itself. It is. Well, any euphemism for 0:04:45.000 --> 0:04:46.760 a lie is a lie. Right. Well, there you go. 0:04:46.880 --> 0:04:49.560 That actually breaks down some of the stuff here about 0:04:49.560 --> 0:04:53.120 the linguistic power of lying, because so many parts of 0:04:53.200 --> 0:04:57.200 language are really akin to lying, like as simile is 0:04:57.279 --> 0:05:01.240 kind of is akin to lying in a way, you know. 0:05:01.720 --> 0:05:05.080 And then uh, is so many figures of speech. Uh, 0:05:05.160 --> 0:05:09.000 whether you're saying, um, that guy literally stabbed me in 0:05:09.040 --> 0:05:11.799 the back, of course you're using language incorrectly in this case. 0:05:11.839 --> 0:05:15.320 But but it's a complete lie. And and even if 0:05:15.320 --> 0:05:17.760 you said, man, he's stabbing in the back and you're 0:05:17.800 --> 0:05:20.640 not um, and you're not adding that literally, that totally 0:05:20.680 --> 0:05:22.760 screws it all up. Even if you're just just using 0:05:22.800 --> 0:05:25.919 that that bit of speech there, you're lying. But but 0:05:26.040 --> 0:05:28.600 you're using a lie to make a point and make 0:05:28.640 --> 0:05:30.920 a comparison. Well, there are different types of flying too. 0:05:31.120 --> 0:05:35.040 You can do it sometimes, um, to avoid responsibility and recussions, right. 0:05:35.440 --> 0:05:37.400 Uh yeah, And this is this is kind of like 0:05:37.440 --> 0:05:41.320 the like a basic Hey did you unloved the dishwasher? Yeah, 0:05:41.320 --> 0:05:43.719 I unloaded the dishwasher. Well that now you get called 0:05:43.720 --> 0:05:46.919 on that. What's a better Well, just I think you 0:05:46.960 --> 0:05:48.960 had a good example the other day where you said, yeah, 0:05:49.279 --> 0:05:51.880 in grade school that you had drawn something on the floor, 0:05:52.600 --> 0:05:57.080 and to avoid the repercussions of that, you you fingered 0:05:57.080 --> 0:05:59.280 another kid in the class and said, ah, he did it. Well, 0:05:59.320 --> 0:06:00.719 it was a little more to Harris in that because 0:06:00.760 --> 0:06:03.840 I wrote his name on the floor, So I was 0:06:04.040 --> 0:06:07.040 I was planning ahead with this crime. Um, so yeah, 0:06:07.040 --> 0:06:10.440 I framed this guy. Better example would be when I 0:06:10.480 --> 0:06:13.640 cut my sister's hair when I was like, I don't know, 0:06:13.640 --> 0:06:15.160 it's like four or something, and she was a couple 0:06:15.200 --> 0:06:17.800 of years younger than me, and uh I she had 0:06:17.839 --> 0:06:19.960 like pigtails, and I cut one of them off with 0:06:20.000 --> 0:06:21.599 a pair of scissors, and I put the scissors in 0:06:21.600 --> 0:06:23.880 the pigtail in her hand and framed her for it, 0:06:24.200 --> 0:06:27.120 and uh yeah, watch out for you man. So there's 0:06:27.120 --> 0:06:29.359 an example. I framed her because I wanted to avoid 0:06:29.400 --> 0:06:31.640 the wrath of my mother, right right, So that's that's 0:06:31.640 --> 0:06:33.440 a that's one of the reasons why you would do 0:06:33.480 --> 0:06:36.440 it to save your reputation, right, you might a lie 0:06:36.560 --> 0:06:40.760 to save your rep avoid hurting someone's feelings. Yeah, classic 0:06:40.800 --> 0:06:44.400 white lie, boost your ego. And when I say that, 0:06:45.000 --> 0:06:47.840 you know it could be sort of information you present 0:06:47.880 --> 0:06:53.000 about yourself via Facebook, Um, you know anything really and 0:06:53.080 --> 0:06:55.240 that that's kind of a lie we tell ourselves to 0:06:55.560 --> 0:06:57.600 you get into this whole area of lies. Is not 0:06:57.680 --> 0:07:01.680 just something that uh we use externally, but we we 0:07:01.880 --> 0:07:04.600 reflect in on ourselves and you get into this whole 0:07:05.160 --> 0:07:09.200 weird area of just the manipulation of our world view, 0:07:09.640 --> 0:07:12.640 in our in our perceived reality via lies. Yeah, and 0:07:12.680 --> 0:07:15.760 we'll talk about self deception to why that's important, um 0:07:15.800 --> 0:07:17.600 in a bit as well. But we also do it 0:07:17.640 --> 0:07:20.400 to manipulate people we allowed to manipulate. And we we 0:07:20.560 --> 0:07:22.400 lie in the sense that we control the amount of 0:07:22.440 --> 0:07:25.840 information given. Sometimes we don't always tell the whole truth, right, 0:07:26.320 --> 0:07:29.200 or if someone asks us a question, we don't uh 0:07:29.440 --> 0:07:31.720 necessarily say oh yes or no, or you know, you 0:07:31.800 --> 0:07:35.200 might just even remain quiet and let them make an assumption. 0:07:35.560 --> 0:07:37.400 This is this is interesting. I have to I was 0:07:37.400 --> 0:07:39.280 gonna wait till later about going to mention Uh, this 0:07:39.320 --> 0:07:43.360 book I've been reading um is called Embassy Town by 0:07:43.480 --> 0:07:48.160 China uh Melville. He's a British author of sci fi 0:07:48.200 --> 0:07:50.720 and fantasy. But it creates a scenario where you're kind 0:07:50.720 --> 0:07:53.480 of an invention of lying scenario where you have an 0:07:53.520 --> 0:07:59.040 alien race that have a really alien language that involved 0:07:59.080 --> 0:08:02.000 like it's very difficult for the people in this book, 0:08:02.360 --> 0:08:05.440 the humans to communicate with the alien species. And uh, 0:08:05.480 --> 0:08:09.000 the aliens have evolved so that they don't have they 0:08:09.000 --> 0:08:11.760 don't have lies in their language, they don't have like 0:08:11.800 --> 0:08:16.360 they're they're intrinsically trustful species. And so you have, uh 0:08:16.680 --> 0:08:20.720 that these aliens are really impressed by humanity's ability to lie. 0:08:20.800 --> 0:08:23.440 Like they're really amused by it, especially when humans lie, 0:08:23.640 --> 0:08:26.360 well mainly when humans lie in their language because they've 0:08:26.520 --> 0:08:29.400 they're incapable of doing it themselves. So to hear somebody 0:08:29.440 --> 0:08:31.560 say something that is not true like totally blows their 0:08:31.600 --> 0:08:34.920 mind because it's I mean, it's like, uh, it's like 0:08:35.000 --> 0:08:38.199 an hallucination or something like a psychedelic experience. They're saying 0:08:38.240 --> 0:08:41.240 something that's not true, but everything that we like, imagine 0:08:41.240 --> 0:08:43.440 if everything you could say is true and you were 0:08:43.480 --> 0:08:46.000 incapable of lying and you heard somebody lie, and you know, 0:08:46.160 --> 0:08:48.280 but that it was a bold faced lie, like if 0:08:48.280 --> 0:08:51.160 they said the skies purple and it clearly wasn't. Like 0:08:51.240 --> 0:08:52.800 is that kind of situation where they're like, whoa, the 0:08:52.840 --> 0:08:54.840 sky is purple? No it isn't. Oh my goodness, and 0:08:54.880 --> 0:08:57.000 they're getting this kind of uh uh, you know, this 0:08:57.120 --> 0:09:00.679 dissonance playing in their head, and so they they they 0:09:00.800 --> 0:09:03.520 they themselves, these aliens try to work up to lying, 0:09:04.600 --> 0:09:07.320 so they'll do things like they'll they'll they'll just they'll 0:09:07.400 --> 0:09:10.040 drop the last part of a sentence, or they'll they'll 0:09:10.080 --> 0:09:13.080 sort of they'll omit information from a sentence in an 0:09:13.080 --> 0:09:15.480 attempt to sort of work their way up to telling 0:09:15.520 --> 0:09:18.320 a full phase a lie. Well that's interesting and UM, 0:09:18.600 --> 0:09:21.000 I mean when when I hear you talk about it 0:09:21.040 --> 0:09:23.080 that way too, it makes me realize how much we 0:09:23.120 --> 0:09:27.400 are always constructing our own reality, so through our own perceptions, 0:09:27.440 --> 0:09:31.360 but also actively through lying, UM, And how that would 0:09:31.400 --> 0:09:34.040 be weird to aliens who are like, huh, they're they're 0:09:34.080 --> 0:09:37.959 creating these little stories. Just essentially what that is. UM, 0:09:38.040 --> 0:09:41.200 You might be surprised to know that there's some some 0:09:42.600 --> 0:09:47.280 jarring stats on how much we lie. UM. According to 0:09:47.400 --> 0:09:49.520 the Science channels The Truth about Liars, which is a 0:09:49.520 --> 0:09:53.320 really interesting documentary. One out of every four conversations that 0:09:53.400 --> 0:09:55.800 lasts more than ten minutes will contain a lie. Wow, 0:09:55.960 --> 0:09:59.400 this doesn't bode well for our podcast if we we 0:09:59.480 --> 0:10:04.520 generally go thirty minutes. So that's what four lives at least. 0:10:04.760 --> 0:10:06.920 This is my second conversation that's going to be longer 0:10:06.960 --> 0:10:09.280 than ten minutes, by the way, So for me, I mean, 0:10:09.480 --> 0:10:14.760 I'm already at the anti men and women line equal portions. Um. 0:10:14.840 --> 0:10:18.320 And then there's another bit of information out there again 0:10:18.320 --> 0:10:20.640 from that Guardian article, The Truth about Lying and Laughing, 0:10:21.240 --> 0:10:24.200 and it says that four and five lives remain undetected, 0:10:24.280 --> 0:10:27.760 that more than people have lied secure job, and that 0:10:27.840 --> 0:10:30.240 more than sixty of the population have cheated on their 0:10:30.280 --> 0:10:34.679 partners at least once. What I don't, I mean, maybe 0:10:34.720 --> 0:10:37.720 I'm just a Pollyanna over here if I'm really surprised 0:10:37.800 --> 0:10:40.839 by that. Um. And then people were invited to keep 0:10:40.840 --> 0:10:43.480 a detailed diary of every conversation that they had in 0:10:43.520 --> 0:10:46.960 a two week period, and the results suggested that most 0:10:46.960 --> 0:10:50.360 people tell about two important lives each day, and that 0:10:50.440 --> 0:10:55.839 a third of conversations involves some form of deception. Well, 0:10:55.880 --> 0:10:59.280 you know there, I can definitely see where they're what's 0:10:59.320 --> 0:11:01.160 a big lie is like a lot of big lies 0:11:01.160 --> 0:11:04.000 saying like, hey, are you done with that assignment yet? Yeah, 0:11:04.000 --> 0:11:05.440 it's done. I just need to tweak it a little bit. 0:11:05.480 --> 0:11:07.320 Yeah they didn't qualify that, right, I mean because a 0:11:07.320 --> 0:11:11.440 white lie we all survived by, probably on a daily basis. Yeah, yeah, yeah, 0:11:11.640 --> 0:11:13.240 whether or not you even know you're doing part of 0:11:13.280 --> 0:11:16.280 being polite, you know, right, you want to pretend to 0:11:16.360 --> 0:11:21.160 interest in a particular conversation or um or just you know, 0:11:21.320 --> 0:11:23.640 it's sometimes lying is kind of just a lie by 0:11:23.640 --> 0:11:26.160 a mission knowing when to keep your trap shut. Well, well, 0:11:26.200 --> 0:11:28.400 you know, if I'm interviewing someone and they're going on 0:11:28.440 --> 0:11:32.000 along soliloquy about something and they go, you know this 0:11:32.160 --> 0:11:33.960 and that, I don't say there, no, I don't know. 0:11:34.040 --> 0:11:35.760 Can you tell me about it instead of me just 0:11:36.360 --> 0:11:38.400 going to google later on? I mean, I'm just trying 0:11:38.400 --> 0:11:40.000 to get an interview out of that person. Said, you 0:11:40.000 --> 0:11:43.480 need those encouraging spurts of oh yeah, which we tend 0:11:43.480 --> 0:11:45.400 to do in conversation anyway. I mean, if you've ever 0:11:45.440 --> 0:11:47.720 been a cocktail party and someone starts talking about something 0:11:47.760 --> 0:11:51.520 you find yourself, you know, your head nodding in any cocouragement, 0:11:51.960 --> 0:11:54.079 which some people take is like, oh, they knew exactly 0:11:54.080 --> 0:11:56.720 what I'm talking about here, I'm kind of I'm doing 0:11:56.720 --> 0:12:00.080 it now, right you arguing it? But but but oh 0:12:00.120 --> 0:12:03.200 yeah yeah we we we. The lies are an essential 0:12:03.200 --> 0:12:06.080 part of our our daily life. Now, they are rather 0:12:06.120 --> 0:12:10.640 different from deception. However, like just blanked in deception is 0:12:10.800 --> 0:12:13.480 it's a little different because you have very simple plants 0:12:13.480 --> 0:12:17.200 and animals that use deception, that have evolved to deceive 0:12:17.920 --> 0:12:22.120 prey or predators and in order to better suffrive a 0:12:22.200 --> 0:12:26.920 hostile environment. Um Like it just like a carnivorous plant 0:12:27.080 --> 0:12:29.120 that doesn't look like something that's gonna eat an insect. 0:12:29.160 --> 0:12:32.320 It looks like a meal rather than a predator. Like 0:12:32.360 --> 0:12:35.040 that's an example a very simple deception. Bugs that look 0:12:35.080 --> 0:12:37.120 like they have eyes in their back. You know, any 0:12:37.120 --> 0:12:40.080 form of camouflage that's deception. But it's not necessarily a lie. 0:12:41.080 --> 0:12:42.679 I mean, it isn't a lie in the case of 0:12:42.720 --> 0:12:47.720 an insect. Allies tend to involve um greater brain power 0:12:48.000 --> 0:12:50.600 and UM, and you generally need to look to, of course, 0:12:50.679 --> 0:12:54.240 the masters of of lies, humans or some of our 0:12:54.800 --> 0:12:58.679 hominid brethren. Yeah. Actually that just reminded me of two examples. 0:12:58.720 --> 0:13:01.000 One is a Porsche spider, which I think they would 0:13:01.000 --> 0:13:04.120 be great like card game players, like a poor face. 0:13:04.920 --> 0:13:08.640 When hunting fellow aracnets, they actually do a little bluffing game. 0:13:08.720 --> 0:13:11.520 They sneak up on an arachnet and they wait until 0:13:11.559 --> 0:13:15.480 another vibration ripples through the web to disguise their own 0:13:15.480 --> 0:13:18.840 like a breeze, and then they're able to also mimic 0:13:18.880 --> 0:13:23.439 the vibrations of other species, so their launches fulled into 0:13:23.480 --> 0:13:27.559 approaching them and the belief that they've actually found a meat. Example, 0:13:27.679 --> 0:13:29.440 so like the first example is like in a horror 0:13:29.480 --> 0:13:32.120 movie where the person is in a creaky house and 0:13:32.240 --> 0:13:35.000 somebody's following them, but they're keeping pace with their footsteps 0:13:35.360 --> 0:13:37.840 and then suddenly they do a like a misstep and 0:13:37.880 --> 0:13:40.680 then they hear the creak of the person behind them, 0:13:40.960 --> 0:13:42.720 right or the wind goes through the door and it 0:13:42.760 --> 0:13:46.240 makes the door close, you know, creekly close, and little 0:13:46.320 --> 0:13:49.559 did they know this, but it was behind the door. Yeah, 0:13:49.679 --> 0:13:52.199 so that's a good example. And then U two apes 0:13:52.280 --> 0:13:55.760 Cocoa and Michael. They both used deception via their sign 0:13:55.880 --> 0:13:59.920 language skills, and one example, Coco broke out a toy cat, 0:14:00.000 --> 0:14:02.960 Are broke up a toy cat, and then signal to 0:14:03.000 --> 0:14:05.160 indicate that had been broken by one of her trainers, 0:14:06.520 --> 0:14:09.240 and then another one, Michael ripped a jacket belonging to 0:14:09.320 --> 0:14:11.480 a trainer, and then when when he was asked who 0:14:11.520 --> 0:14:15.160 was responsible, he signed that it was Coco. Oh yeah, 0:14:15.200 --> 0:14:17.839 so you see, I mean deception is is a big 0:14:17.880 --> 0:14:20.960 part of how the animal world and how how we 0:14:21.040 --> 0:14:24.920 navigate all of our circumstances, and it definitely gives us 0:14:24.960 --> 0:14:29.760 an evolutionary leg up, so to speak. Yeah, and it's uh, 0:14:29.920 --> 0:14:32.160 you know, it comes down in a lot of ways 0:14:32.160 --> 0:14:35.960 to being able to empathize, you know, and the and 0:14:36.000 --> 0:14:38.920 what we call the theory of mind, which is, you know, 0:14:39.000 --> 0:14:42.720 the the ability to to look at another animal or 0:14:42.840 --> 0:14:47.040 or or human especially and being able to recognize that 0:14:47.120 --> 0:14:49.880 there is a mind there, and being able and being 0:14:49.920 --> 0:14:54.479 able to sort of try and put yourself in their shoes, um, 0:14:54.480 --> 0:14:56.640 trying to figure out like how they are they are 0:14:56.760 --> 0:14:59.880 seeing the world around them. And then of course lying 0:15:00.080 --> 0:15:03.160 involves trying to use that to your advantage, Okay, because 0:15:03.200 --> 0:15:06.040 if you can inhabit that person's worldview, you can better 0:15:06.080 --> 0:15:10.760 construct a lie or a story. Right, you can kind 0:15:10.800 --> 0:15:12.280 of think of like I tend to think of the 0:15:12.320 --> 0:15:14.600 world view people's world views is kind of this bubble 0:15:14.640 --> 0:15:18.000 that surrounds them, you know, like this artificial reality, um, 0:15:18.000 --> 0:15:21.320 this virtual world. And and yeah, if you can empathize 0:15:21.360 --> 0:15:23.160 with somebody, the better you can empathize with somebody, the 0:15:23.160 --> 0:15:26.720 better you can understand their worldview. And uh. And therefore 0:15:27.040 --> 0:15:28.480 you know, you can use that. You can use it 0:15:28.480 --> 0:15:31.320 for a positive effect or or an extremely negative effect 0:15:31.320 --> 0:15:34.280 that depending on what your your scheme is. But in 0:15:34.320 --> 0:15:36.640 a way, it's like theory of mind. It's it's in 0:15:36.640 --> 0:15:39.200 a way it's reading a mind. It's it's being able 0:15:39.240 --> 0:15:42.200 to see what that mind consists of and and what 0:15:42.280 --> 0:15:44.720 that person may or may not be thinking about anticipating 0:15:44.760 --> 0:15:47.880 to anticipation. I mean that's key. That's the I mean, 0:15:47.920 --> 0:15:51.720 that's the evolutionary point here, is that if you can 0:15:52.760 --> 0:15:55.440 understand what that other person's mind is doing, then you 0:15:55.520 --> 0:15:59.280 have the advantage in a survival situation. Yeah, and this 0:15:59.320 --> 0:16:03.600 is interesting too that lyne has other psychological benefits. Um, 0:16:03.640 --> 0:16:06.720 there's scientific evidence that shows that depressive people are more 0:16:06.760 --> 0:16:11.960 honest with themselves and uh than than nondepressive people who 0:16:12.000 --> 0:16:14.960 are mentally healthy people, and that when people recover from 0:16:15.000 --> 0:16:20.880 a depression, they become less honest, assumably or presumably around 0:16:20.880 --> 0:16:24.120 the circumstances of that depression. So I kind of read 0:16:24.160 --> 0:16:26.080 that as you know, you sort of need to create 0:16:26.080 --> 0:16:28.520 a story for yourself in order to kind of get 0:16:28.560 --> 0:16:32.440 over that that bad patch in your life, huh, or 0:16:32.560 --> 0:16:34.880 to a certain extent, like the less you're caring about life. 0:16:34.960 --> 0:16:37.120 It's it's kind of like you start, you get depressed. 0:16:37.160 --> 0:16:39.440 Maybe you're not caring about your physical appearance as much 0:16:39.600 --> 0:16:43.280 during that depression, and so you're not you know, you're 0:16:43.280 --> 0:16:46.960 not doing personal maintenance. But then also by not lying enough, 0:16:47.080 --> 0:16:51.200 you're you're falling out on your worldview maintenance, because the 0:16:51.200 --> 0:16:55.080 world needs to be carefully groomed and uh and and 0:16:55.080 --> 0:16:59.800 tweaked with just the right ensemble of lies. That's interesting. Yeah, 0:17:00.000 --> 0:17:07.640 you're sitting around your in your your your bathrobe, presumably unwashed. Yeah, 0:17:07.800 --> 0:17:10.520 not lying to yourself, and it's just a matter of 0:17:10.640 --> 0:17:13.080 shaving up and and uh, putting on a happy smile. 0:17:13.119 --> 0:17:16.400 I suppose, Um, Yeah, faking until you make it right. Yeah, 0:17:16.440 --> 0:17:18.920 fake it to make You've talked about that before. Evolutionary 0:17:18.920 --> 0:17:22.720 biologist David Livingston Smith, also from the documentary UM The 0:17:22.720 --> 0:17:25.919 Truth About Liars, talks about in biological terminology, you have 0:17:25.960 --> 0:17:29.080 a deceiver in a sucker. Suckers don't do well. So 0:17:29.160 --> 0:17:32.360 that's really his his scientific terms. Yes, he says that 0:17:32.400 --> 0:17:36.480 these are the evolutionary biological terms for lung, a deceiver 0:17:36.560 --> 0:17:39.720 and a sucker. It's it's a pretty high brow there. Um. 0:17:39.760 --> 0:17:42.600 So those of us who are especially skilled at manipulating others, 0:17:42.640 --> 0:17:46.639 like politicians, they're they're like the stage magicians of our fantasies. 0:17:46.880 --> 0:17:49.080 I think that's interesting how he phrased that, tend to 0:17:49.119 --> 0:17:52.400 be the most successful people because they're skilled at deception. 0:17:53.160 --> 0:17:56.879 So again here here we're talking about the benefits of lying, 0:17:57.400 --> 0:18:00.159 and then that people who tend to be more six us, 0:18:00.160 --> 0:18:03.160 we are better liars. And again that that phrase, they're 0:18:03.200 --> 0:18:07.680 like the stage magicians of our fantasies. They're they're creating 0:18:07.720 --> 0:18:10.640 this world and inhabiting our own worlds, as you pointed out, 0:18:11.280 --> 0:18:14.439 and presenting a fantasy that we can buy into, that 0:18:14.480 --> 0:18:17.200 we cannot help but buy into because we have something 0:18:17.280 --> 0:18:20.679 called the truth bias, in which we want something to 0:18:20.760 --> 0:18:24.040 be true. So we're already sort of it's weird. We're 0:18:24.040 --> 0:18:27.440 hardwired to lie, but we're also hard wired to say, yeah, 0:18:27.480 --> 0:18:30.760 I believe that, I want to believe you, which makes 0:18:30.840 --> 0:18:34.040 us like the ultimate suckers. So hey, we're gonna take 0:18:34.040 --> 0:18:36.320 a quick break here and when we come back, why 0:18:36.440 --> 0:18:44.199 we are lousy liars? This presentation is brought to you 0:18:44.280 --> 0:18:52.280 by Intel Sponsors of Tomorrow, and we're back. So why 0:18:52.320 --> 0:18:55.840 are we lousy liars? Because we cannot help but to 0:18:55.960 --> 0:19:00.240 give ourselves away in many different ways. One is is 0:19:00.320 --> 0:19:03.679 micro expressions, which you've probably heard about before. Yeah, this 0:19:03.720 --> 0:19:05.800 is the whole like thing like look at somebody's brow 0:19:06.240 --> 0:19:10.119 they're talking to you. Yeah. It's basically like yeah and 0:19:10.200 --> 0:19:15.320 involuntarily excuse me, involuntary muscle movement um that discloses an 0:19:15.359 --> 0:19:19.679 emotion and under one of a second. So you have 0:19:19.800 --> 0:19:23.360 to be particularly adept at reading someone's face in order 0:19:23.400 --> 0:19:25.399 to see this, or you could have like a camera 0:19:25.440 --> 0:19:27.960 and then slow moment and try to figure it out. 0:19:28.040 --> 0:19:30.880 But people really do do this. They cannot help themselves. 0:19:30.920 --> 0:19:34.040 So if someone is trying to hide the fact that 0:19:34.080 --> 0:19:38.080 they are feeling shocked or they're they're fearful of something, 0:19:38.200 --> 0:19:41.320 that emotion is going to cross their face flicker across 0:19:41.320 --> 0:19:43.679 their face even though they have a huge smile on. 0:19:44.480 --> 0:19:47.080 And that's another thing to look at too, is that 0:19:47.240 --> 0:19:50.920 when someone is smiling, they're engaging their their eye muscles, 0:19:51.320 --> 0:19:54.200 and so a fake smile. You'll see that the smile 0:19:54.359 --> 0:19:56.880 is there, but the eyes aren't actually moving. There's there's 0:19:57.000 --> 0:20:00.199 very subtle um indicators there that will show you like 0:20:00.280 --> 0:20:05.000 that person is is smiling through fear um. So that's 0:20:05.000 --> 0:20:07.680 that's one of the reasons why we're crappy liars. Oh 0:20:07.720 --> 0:20:09.880 that's like there was a bit on Modern Family where 0:20:09.880 --> 0:20:12.440 they're talking about like reacting to the other person's jokes 0:20:12.600 --> 0:20:14.800 and about how they'll be smiling with their their mouth 0:20:14.800 --> 0:20:16.840 but out with their eyes. Oh. I didn't see that, 0:20:17.160 --> 0:20:18.879 but you and we've all done it at one point, right. 0:20:18.920 --> 0:20:22.480 You know how that feels too. It feels weird. You're like, okay, 0:20:22.520 --> 0:20:25.600 I'm doing the thing, and you're trying to I mean, 0:20:26.680 --> 0:20:29.359 you're trying to manually manipulate all of these things that 0:20:29.600 --> 0:20:33.359 normally occur naturally, like when I naturally respond to something funny. 0:20:33.400 --> 0:20:36.000 I'm not really I'm not cautious. I'm not going going 0:20:36.040 --> 0:20:38.840 like all right, qu smile now, all right, now, eyes 0:20:39.119 --> 0:20:40.760 look at the person who just made a joke, all right, 0:20:40.760 --> 0:20:42.760 and then do the ha ha, you know, because like 0:20:42.760 --> 0:20:45.560 we've thought you were creeped out by laughter yoga because 0:20:45.680 --> 0:20:48.520 it's it's fake laughter, right, it doesn't ring true, and 0:20:48.560 --> 0:20:51.439 so it's just creepy. Um. But yeah, I mean, you 0:20:51.440 --> 0:20:54.120 don't have your neurons firing, you know, to those particular 0:20:54.200 --> 0:20:56.640 muscles saying hey, come on, guys, let's get engaged because 0:20:56.640 --> 0:20:58.480 you really think this is funny. So it's a little 0:20:58.520 --> 0:21:01.720 bit like having botox eyes. Yeah, I mean that on 0:21:01.760 --> 0:21:04.560 the other side, unless you're like a complete alien, I guess, 0:21:04.560 --> 0:21:07.120 and you just have to fake everything. But well, yeah, 0:21:07.119 --> 0:21:11.119 that you just steal someone else's face and that circumstance. Um, 0:21:11.160 --> 0:21:16.040