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Speaker 1: Hey there, it's Catherine. Just a little note about the

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Speaker 1: audio quality and the intro. We had Chelsea calling in

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Speaker 1: from our remote location, so you may notice a little

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Speaker 1: bit of a difference in the audio quality just for

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Speaker 1: the intro. We were back in studio for the recording

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Speaker 1: of this episode. Just wanted to let you know, enjoy

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Speaker 1: the episode.

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Speaker 2: Hi Catherine, Hi Chelsea.

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Speaker 3: Hi?

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Speaker 4: Has it going?

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Speaker 2: He's it going? Girl?

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Speaker 1: You know what, it's going great. I'm having an easy summer,

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Speaker 1: so that's pretty good.

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Speaker 5: How about you.

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Speaker 2: What are you up to? Well, I'm dealing.

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Speaker 6: My foot is getting bettery damn.

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Speaker 4: Now I'm now back in a sneaker and on Monday

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Speaker 4: they X ray and may foot to make sure it's

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Speaker 4: all healed.

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Speaker 6: And then I can start working out again. Yeah, how

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Speaker 6: I love that.

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Speaker 7: Back to Ben Bruno.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, back to Ben Bruno. He calls it. He texts

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Speaker 6: me every day going how are you?

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Speaker 2: How are you?

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Speaker 6: And I'm like, just fucking shut up. I'll see you

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Speaker 6: when I see you.

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Speaker 4: But I got a massive CO two laser on my

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Speaker 4: face also, which my face feels like somebody took sandpaper

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Speaker 4: to it, Like it still feels that way, and it's

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Speaker 4: been like a week and a half.

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Speaker 6: So I'm hoping that starts to calm down and my.

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Speaker 4: Son's almost all gone, but I still am swollen from that.

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Speaker 4: You should have seen the day that I took pictures

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Speaker 4: and then I deleted them all from my phone because

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Speaker 4: I'm like, oh god, this is gonna end up with

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Speaker 4: in some sort of Jeffrey Epstein's story.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, you don't need that going wide.

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Speaker 6: Exactly.

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Speaker 7: Have you been in your h what's the chamber called?

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Speaker 3: Have you been? Oh?

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Speaker 6: Yeah, hyperbaric? Every day I'm in my hyperbaric.

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Speaker 4: I'm staying at my friend Kat's house until my house

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Speaker 4: new finished date is August twenty second, which I won't

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Speaker 4: even be here for, so that works out perfectly great.

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Speaker 4: As usual, I'm taking my span, I'm taking advantage of

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Speaker 4: all this time. Yesterday I finished a fucking puzzle. I

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Speaker 4: did an actual puzzle. I posted it on Instagram because

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Speaker 4: I don't think I've ever done a puzzle in my

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Speaker 4: life and completed it.

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Speaker 7: It's kind of nice, is it?

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Speaker 6: I know it's not it, I guess it is.

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Speaker 2: I mean it wasn't.

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Speaker 4: It's not fun. I like activities that are fun, and

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Speaker 4: that wasn't fun. That was just like, oh, my god,

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Speaker 4: I'm so bored. I've read three books. Oh you know

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Speaker 4: what I wanted to mention when we were doing our

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Speaker 4: book round up, I totally forgot right exactly.

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Speaker 1: We did a book round up episode for everybody. It's

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Speaker 1: a minisode and so that'll come out next Friday, August.

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Speaker 8: Dave.

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Speaker 4: I read a fucking awesome book and it's it's called

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Speaker 4: Red Notice by Bill Browder, who's like financial guy that

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Speaker 4: invested in Russia after they got rid of communism so

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Speaker 4: to speak, and then the public everything went public, like

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Speaker 4: all their government agencies went public, and so he went

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Speaker 4: in and saw a huge opportunity for investment. And it's

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Speaker 4: all about how corrupt and crazy Russia is. People die,

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Speaker 4: and this is like a venture capitalist kind of investment

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Speaker 4: banker guy, not a VC and more of a banker

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Speaker 4: like investment guy, but nay, billions of dollars in Russia.

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Speaker 4: And then they wanted him out and then they realized

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Speaker 4: that he was kind of like working the system but legally,

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Speaker 4: and it's all about.

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Speaker 6: It's a fascinating read.

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Speaker 4: And I forgot to mention that I was thinking of

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Speaker 4: that book that if you're like into that kind of thing,

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Speaker 4: WI I'm into I send it to my Russian nephew

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Speaker 4: so he can step defending Russian.

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Speaker 7: Perfect perfect, So it works in the family too. Yeah, excellent.

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Speaker 1: I mean, obviously I've sent you like twenty five books

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Speaker 1: to read for the podcast, so.

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Speaker 6: I know so many. But our guest is one of

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Speaker 6: my favorite people. You guys.

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Speaker 4: She opens for me in Vegas. She's opening for me

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Speaker 4: again this August thirtieth. My next gig in Vegas. My

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Speaker 4: next night at the Cosmo was August thirtieth, so she'll

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Speaker 4: be my opener. If you haven't seen her perform, you

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Speaker 4: need to. She's hilarious. Also, I added a second show

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Speaker 4: in West Hampton, so I'm doing two nights in West Hampton,

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Speaker 4: Hampton in August August twenty first, which is sold out,

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Speaker 4: and then August twenty second. Yeah, so please welcome a.

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Speaker 6: Comedian, hopefully a new podcaster. She's had her own radio show.

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Speaker 6: She is won a hot fucking mess Y'aminika Saunders.

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Speaker 2: You're still sweating from last night. You were sweating last

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Speaker 2: night too. Are you going through Perry menopause?

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Speaker 5: Listen, bitch, I want the away on a train.

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Speaker 2: Well, whose fucking fault is that?

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Speaker 5: Don't you live here?

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Speaker 2: You don't know how to get on a train. No,

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Speaker 2: you are, okay. Yaminika just walked in. She smells like

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Speaker 2: marijuana as usual.

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Speaker 5: I have a video. Yeah, I could just put on

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Speaker 5: on the ground. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Just throw all her stuff on the floor.

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Speaker 5: Please. Right here is perfect. I just hit a little

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Speaker 5: bit of something before I came up here. Don't do this? Yeah,

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Speaker 5: thank you?

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Speaker 2: There here she comes. One of your boobs is on

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Speaker 2: the other side. What's going on? What happened after I

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Speaker 2: left last night? Okay? First of all, Yaminica Saunders is

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Speaker 2: on the podcast today. She's a very very special guest.

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Speaker 5: I'm to take this off.

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Speaker 2: Oh god, Catherine, have you met Yama yet? I have?

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Speaker 7: Not only through her instagram?

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Speaker 2: Live Hold on a second, one second?

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Speaker 7: Getting under yes this outfit?

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Speaker 2: Yes please okay, Hi, Yaminica, sit down, please, let's go.

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Speaker 2: Let's go. You have lipstick on your teeth? Do you

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Speaker 2: want to I don't care.

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Speaker 5: I don't give a fuck anymore.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I'm trying to help you. Yeah you can curse.

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Speaker 5: Okay, Hello, everybody, welcome to my show.

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Speaker 2: I am Anina.

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Speaker 5: Hi, my love. You're so cute.

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Speaker 7: Oh, thank you?

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Speaker 5: And skin this.

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Speaker 3: Is the type of white I like, why can't you

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Speaker 3: get to that type of porcelain.

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Speaker 2: You don't like my First of all, you have fucking

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Speaker 2: lipstick all over your face and your teeth. Yeah, look

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Speaker 2: at yourself.

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Speaker 5: Let me see, I see you mile, This is you

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Speaker 5: self centered bitch.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, let me recap what happened last night. We

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Speaker 2: went to dinner. It was supposed to be an innocent

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Speaker 2: in her.

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Speaker 3: It wasn't innocent in to UK, and you messed everything up.

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Speaker 3: I was completely sane and sober before you showed up,

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Speaker 3: and then two minutes after you arrived, I was like,

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Speaker 3: oh wait, did this bitch put some acid in my bag? No?

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Speaker 2: I didn't bring any drugs. I didn't have any drugs.

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Speaker 5: She brought to Australia. Your lesbians, and.

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Speaker 2: One is a lesbian? I think I don't know the

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Speaker 2: other one is a lesbian?

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Speaker 3: Baba, No no, no, no, no, definitely if she ain't a lesbian,

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Speaker 3: she need to talk to somebody, right, okayed the stylist immediately,

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Speaker 3: and no dist because I don't want to hear the lesbians.

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Speaker 3: What you mean?

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Speaker 2: We be talking about the stilence when you're in a tank.

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Speaker 3: Because I'm forty, you know, and a grown wiry men

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Speaker 3: A pause. I'm hot and I'm cold, so the part

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Speaker 3: of me that's cold got tights on.

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Speaker 2: Sorry that her voice is going out. She's standing up

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Speaker 2: and demonstrating sound like no, no, no, I have to

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Speaker 2: explain listeners, this is at iHeart.

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Speaker 3: You ain't got the microphones to pick up motherfuckers when

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Speaker 3: they go all over the place.

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Speaker 5: You need to talk to the budgeting people. Did you

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Speaker 5: tell them you white? Or was that currency up?

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Speaker 2: Now they now.

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Speaker 5: What is everybody black? Welcome to the club? Whitey.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Whenever I complained about anything political, she's like, bitches,

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Speaker 2: this is on fucking you and you are you and

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Speaker 2: you're a fucking white bitch. Friends who I mean? I

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Speaker 2: didn't vote for Donald Trump, obviously, but.

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Speaker 3: You know the thing about it, No, no, no, yes you

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Speaker 3: are because no, no, no, not you not, but you are.

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Speaker 3: Let me tell you why, Chelsea. For some reason, Chelsea

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Speaker 3: definitely the white woman to get it. But then she

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Speaker 3: hang around a flock of white bitches that don't. So

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Speaker 3: if I tell her she ain't shit, I want her

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Speaker 3: to tell it to the other white bitches that's around

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Speaker 3: her to day. Ain't ship because she ain't ship, so

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Speaker 3: that they become ship because now I keep telling her

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Speaker 3: to day, ain't ship through her.

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Speaker 2: The first of all, the white bitches I hang out

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Speaker 2: with are all on the same team as I am.

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Speaker 2: So what team is that team? And fuck it, what

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Speaker 2: do you mean we're on the same team. We're not

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Speaker 2: on fucking Donald Trump's team. We're on the No no, no, no, no, no, no,

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Speaker 2: no no.

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Speaker 3: I don't think they're with Donald Trump team. I do

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Speaker 3: think that they're white as hell. Yeah team all of that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, But a lot of white people can't

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Speaker 2: helping white I mean most of it.

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Speaker 5: Have you tried?

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Speaker 2: Yah ya?

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Speaker 3: Men are trying to help white women every day. Bring

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Speaker 3: on more mocha latto children. So go talk to a

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Speaker 3: black man. Have you talked you a black senator lately

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Speaker 3: and asked him?

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Speaker 2: We have a black senator? Do you? I don't, do

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Speaker 2: you show? Are you sure? I know I don't have

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Speaker 2: a black seven?

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Speaker 3: Can somebody? I hope it's I hope the senator is

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Speaker 3: black and that you don't.

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Speaker 2: Know California, I do not have a black senator in Maryland?

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Speaker 2: Are in Maryland? The governor?

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Speaker 5: What are you?

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Speaker 2: What are you talking about? She's from Maryland? Actually, I just.

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Speaker 3: Maryland where they sent that motherfucker back to El Salad.

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Speaker 3: I tell you, white men doing whatever, How the fuck

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Speaker 3: do you send a motherfucker who's not even ol Salvadorian

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Speaker 3: to Al Salvador and then motherfucker's from Maryland?

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Speaker 5: How are we doing this? Hello? White people? Is this

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Speaker 5: thing on? Is this what you voted.

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Speaker 3: For when y'all thought niggas was gonna be the one

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Speaker 3: down there suffering the most? And look at you, huh,

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Speaker 3: look at you? Now use a nigga too. That's my

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Speaker 3: new my current specialist called White Nigga. You can get

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Speaker 3: it on YouTube. It is perfect for this because everything

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Speaker 3: that I talk about in my special White Nigga is

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Speaker 3: happening right now. And if you are a white nigga,

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Speaker 3: go listen to it. And I'm telling you right now,

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Speaker 3: the second part is about white bitches. White women take

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Speaker 3: responsibility for the shit that you did. Shut the fuck

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Speaker 3: up and bend over now, bitch, because it's Handsmaid's tail, right,

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Speaker 3: it's a Handsmaids saal. I never watched one fucking episode

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Speaker 3: of that thing, but by the cover, I can tell

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Speaker 3: you that white women gonna look like that shit by

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Speaker 3: next Tuesday at five thirty.

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Speaker 5: Okay, bitch, welcome to the club.

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Speaker 3: And I'm a big black bitch with big greasy titties

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Speaker 3: and I'm gonna go straight in that kitchen, honey, and

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna make some flapjacks and I'm telling and I'm

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Speaker 3: gonna get it. Listen me right, I'm going in there.

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Speaker 3: Chelsea going in there too. You know, if I gotta

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Speaker 3: work underneath the white woman, I need Chelsea. Were gonna

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Speaker 3: have some fun, you know what I'm saying. At night

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Speaker 3: when they tell all the slaves to go to sleep,

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Speaker 3: and then Chelsea say, get undereath my bed, I'm gonna

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Speaker 3: put you in a little drawer here and then I'm

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Speaker 3: gonna go in there. Hopefully I can fit. You know,

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Speaker 3: I'm heavy set. And then when Massa go to sleep,

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Speaker 3: she's gonna open the drawer and then we're gonna have

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Speaker 3: like a little American girl.

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Speaker 2: No, okay, I appreciate it. Okay, I understand, do you?

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Speaker 3: No? I want people to slow sweet chair, you can

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Speaker 3: be on to pick that cuton anyway.

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Speaker 2: This is Yaminika. She has a special out on YouTube

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Speaker 2: that I would encourage every single person to watch because

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Speaker 2: it's very women. I know you like a lot of

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Speaker 2: us are Democrats, and we vote for the right right things.

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Speaker 2: But I think what I've learned from all of my

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Speaker 2: black sisters is how disappointed they are in constantly showing

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Speaker 2: up and showing up for election after election, fighting the

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Speaker 2: good fight, fighting the good fight, and yet half of

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Speaker 2: the white women in this country don't seem to show up.

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Speaker 2: They don't seem to and then they vote for somebody

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Speaker 2: like this fucking asshole. And now we're living in this

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Speaker 2: hell which unveils a new hell every single day. So

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Speaker 2: it's a great learning and teaching special for all of

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Speaker 2: us who are are not as enlightened as we want

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Speaker 2: to be about actually the dynamic between people of color

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Speaker 2: and women of color and what they have done for

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Speaker 2: this country versus what white women have done for this country.

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Speaker 5: Wow, isn't that beautiful? Is every now and then you

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Speaker 5: really get it.

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Speaker 2: Let's talk about what happened last night?

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Speaker 5: And I like her.

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Speaker 2: I know you love me, and you can't help. There's

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Speaker 2: nothing you can do about it, there's nothing. You're in

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Speaker 2: love with me. Actually, you get googly out of you

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Speaker 2: see me, and you're.

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Speaker 3: Just yesterday, I don't remember it was warm right now,

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Speaker 3: I was wrong about that.

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Speaker 2: You loved it, loved.

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Speaker 5: That your hands will on my warm vagina.

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Speaker 2: No, they weren't on your vagina.

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Speaker 5: And you're a white women's vagina's warm.

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Speaker 2: No, I mean yeah, usually they're not cold. They're not cold.

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Speaker 2: I mean vagina's are typically hot. Yeah, you're horny, your horny,

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Speaker 2: And she still thinks she's having a baby. I'm trying

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Speaker 2: to convince her that that's not the right move you

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Speaker 2: want to bring. But think about it, bringing a baby

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Speaker 2: into this world. Think about it. Is that a nice

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Speaker 2: thing to do to a baby?

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Speaker 3: You know what, I'm gonna say this. You know what,

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Speaker 3: here's another teaching moment through babies. When you were talking

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Speaker 3: about how black women feel right about how white women

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Speaker 3: continuously don't show up the way they ask us to

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Speaker 3: show up for them. Right, Yes, here's the real reality.

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Speaker 3: Nobody because people are like, well, it's my you know,

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Speaker 3: I'm thinking about myself. I feel nobody has a problem

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Speaker 3: right with white women going, hey, I like to have

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Speaker 3: a great life. Yeah, I'd like to vote for things

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Speaker 3: that are in my interest That's totally fine. The problem

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Speaker 3: is when the things that are in your interests and

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Speaker 3: that are gonna help you are gonna disenfranchise and disadvantage somebody.

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Speaker 5: Else, and you still vote for it.

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Speaker 3: That's what makes you catch you next Tuesday, right on

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Speaker 3: Wednesday because to day Wednesday right or is it Thursday?

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Speaker 5: Still current?

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Speaker 3: So the reality is do what you want, be who

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Speaker 3: you want, but think about the repercussions of what your

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Speaker 3: space and taking up space in the world looks like

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Speaker 3: for everybody else. So in terms of wanting a child, yeah,

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Speaker 3: I do think that it is very selfish of me. Right,

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Speaker 3: I'm forty six necessarily, Well, I just want to say,

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Speaker 3: just to be aware, I am forty six by the

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Speaker 3: time I'm ready. I told you say maybe forty eight.

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Speaker 3: Now I'm moved at to fifty. You know, I never

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Speaker 3: know when we're ready. I've come from a family.

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Speaker 2: That definitely not ready. Now, I just want to put

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Speaker 2: that out there. I've traveled with you, I've been on there.

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Speaker 2: You are not ready to have a baby. So, okay,

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Speaker 2: you're excellent, You're a giant baby. Okay. You you can't

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Speaker 2: show up anywhere on time without fucking things hanging out

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Speaker 2: of your bags, without fucking wigs and hair. I mean,

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Speaker 2: you don't even know what the fuck is going to happen.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes we have to drop her off on the we

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Speaker 2: pick her up and she's on the side of the

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Speaker 2: road like a street walker.

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Speaker 5: She that's true. Listen.

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Speaker 3: I in terms of the baby, oh god, I want

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Speaker 3: the baby, but I do I am thinking realistically, like

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Speaker 3: also with as old as I am, you know, no

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Speaker 3: disrespect that women can have babies, you know, but you know,

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Speaker 3: my life expectancy right for the child, right is like

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Speaker 3: my kids, I'm going to see them to the twenty

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Speaker 3: five maybe twenty six, you know, so I don't know.

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Speaker 5: I it is scary.

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Speaker 2: And also your schedule, your stand up. You're out every night,

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Speaker 2: you're doing stand up all the time.

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Speaker 5: I could see my kid until thirty at this point.

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Speaker 2: Right, it depends how long?

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Speaker 5: Yeah, thirty yeah, thirty five maybe, you know.

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Speaker 2: Okay, anyway, we'll put a pin in the baby thing, okay,

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Speaker 2: because I don't think I'm gonna work hard to prevent

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Speaker 2: it from happening. I'm going to try to work hard

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Speaker 2: to convince you not to have it. I think I

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Speaker 2: will well, I will end up come mothering the baby.

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Speaker 2: And that's also why I want you to have one,

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Speaker 2: because I don't have the fucking bandwidth Okay, last night

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Speaker 2: I went to dinner. Where were we went to Harlem.

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Speaker 3: We went to the We were in the Apollo, inside

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Speaker 3: the Apollo. The Apollo, Yeah it was, but they've it's

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Speaker 3: kind of gutted out now so but it's also a hotel.

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Speaker 3: It's like a whole bunch of stuff going on there.

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Speaker 3: I thought they still have the theater at the Apollo.

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Speaker 3: They do, yeah, but then there's like another But where

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Speaker 3: we went was the Victoria Oside Restaurant.

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Speaker 2: That was nice. That was yeah, I would like that

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Speaker 2: chef he was.

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Speaker 5: He was amazing.

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Speaker 2: And I had grilled oysters, my favorite. I had two

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Speaker 2: orders of grilled oysters. That's how fucking good.

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Speaker 3: They He was trying to have sex with me, and

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Speaker 3: I said, take it easy on those oysters.

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Speaker 5: I know how you get. Yeah, anyway, I came.

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Speaker 2: I showed up with some friends to lesbians and then

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Speaker 2: another friend of mine, another homosexual friend of mine.

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Speaker 3: No dick for me, you always come with no nothing

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Speaker 3: for me. She well, listen, I want a few pieces

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Speaker 3: of dick my driver.

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Speaker 2: I have a driver.

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Speaker 5: No, don't do that.

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Speaker 2: Well, no, I'm gonna. I'm gonna. Because he was sexually asserted,

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Speaker 2: it's not Okay, my driver rock I love him. Okay, yes,

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Speaker 2: he don't do that. Last night last night, Rafa said, hey,

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Speaker 2: can someone bring me a coffee outside? Because he was outside.

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Speaker 2: Guess what? And yeah, Yah came over and said, don't

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Speaker 2: let Yama bring him the coffee because she'll sexually, she'll

365
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Speaker 2: she'll hit on him. I said, I know, we've already been.

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Speaker 5: The man is married.

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Speaker 2: Rafa is scared of Yama. Yes he is married. No,

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Speaker 2: he loves you, but I love him. I would never

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Speaker 2: do this, but no, no, no, no, you see the thing

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Speaker 2: is way wait, this is the story.

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Speaker 5: I'm not sure Haras is being nice.

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Speaker 2: Now. Remember who's talking Kelsey everywhere we go?

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Speaker 5: Oh she's being nice. He must want to fuck him.

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Speaker 2: Everywhere we go, wherever we go, and she's we've been

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Speaker 2: on the road together many times. She hits on either

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Speaker 2: the security guard, he's the driver, the guy, remember from Houston.

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Speaker 5: I got the picture.

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Speaker 2: I got the picture with her, I know, but he

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Speaker 2: wanted the picture with you.

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Speaker 5: I know he took a picture.

381
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Speaker 3: No, you sent me the picture of you and him

382
00:16:26,280 --> 00:16:27,960
Speaker 3: together like a bitch, But I still use it.

383
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Speaker 5: The Master debate.

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Speaker 2: She was hitting so so Rafa.

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Speaker 3: One night I Rob just cropped Chelsea out of his

386
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Speaker 3: Sometimes I don't have time to crop her out.

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Speaker 5: Ready to go.

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Speaker 2: Who is a married man and has a family. She

389
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Speaker 2: she he drove. He drove Yama home one night when

390
00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:47,120
Speaker 2: we were out up to shenan Against in New York City.

391
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Speaker 2: He dropped me off at my hotel and then he

392
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Speaker 2: dropped Yama off and I said, Rafa, if she makes

393
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Speaker 2: you uncomfortable, it's okay to be firm with her. You know,

394
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Speaker 2: you're a married man. And the next morning when I

395
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Speaker 2: saw him, he was trying to be a gentleman about it,

396
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Speaker 2: but he said, she's very aggressive. He said, she's very aggressive.

397
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Speaker 2: So he she was pressuring my driver to fornicate with her.

398
00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:12,280
Speaker 2: But I've seen you do it to almost anything. But

399
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Speaker 2: in New Orleans. Remember at the at the at the

400
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Speaker 2: restaurant with Amy we went to New Orleans. Yeah, and

401
00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:23,200
Speaker 2: the waiter, oh, you guys gave him my phone, Amy,

402
00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:25,280
Speaker 2: Amy Schumer gave him your phone number. She did that

403
00:17:25,359 --> 00:17:32,399
Speaker 2: was nice of her. And did you hear from him?

404
00:17:32,880 --> 00:17:33,080
Speaker 5: Wait?

405
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Speaker 2: Track, you'll stay on track, because okay. So then we

406
00:17:38,119 --> 00:17:40,439
Speaker 2: go to dinner last night and then she has like

407
00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:44,120
Speaker 2: three friends there. Two guys there right, three. How many

408
00:17:44,119 --> 00:17:46,160
Speaker 2: people were we? It just kept getting bigger and bigger

409
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Speaker 2: and bigger.

410
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Speaker 5: And then I turned somebody was there?

411
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Speaker 2: Yes, And then I thought these two people were with

412
00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:56,800
Speaker 2: you guys, and they weren't, so I just added them

413
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Speaker 2: to our group. I was random. One was a French

414
00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:03,280
Speaker 2: woman and this other woman who was she was funny,

415
00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:05,680
Speaker 2: so I mean she no, no, no, I know her? Oh

416
00:18:05,720 --> 00:18:07,199
Speaker 2: you did, because yeah, yeah, I was like, who the

417
00:18:07,240 --> 00:18:07,879
Speaker 2: fuck are these two?

418
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Speaker 5: They were at the house.

419
00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:09,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, they came to the house.

420
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Speaker 5: No, no, no, no, that's what my friend's wife.

421
00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:14,000
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, yea, yeah.

422
00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:14,959
Speaker 5: Yeah, yea, yeah, no, no, no, no, no.

423
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Speaker 3: I knew the French woman, we didn't know. No, she's Argentinian, okay, yeah,

424
00:18:18,920 --> 00:18:19,640
Speaker 3: and we didn't know her.

425
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Speaker 5: But she wanted.

426
00:18:20,359 --> 00:18:21,720
Speaker 2: Smoking, so I thought she was French.

427
00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:23,680
Speaker 5: Yea, yeah, yeah yeah. She had to get the cigarettes

428
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Speaker 5: from France though, because of the tarifs.

429
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:27,440
Speaker 2: But so we go back to uh, we go back

430
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Speaker 2: to U Yama's house and we're smoking weed and whatever else.

431
00:18:31,080 --> 00:18:34,919
Speaker 2: But Yama decides to disrobe. There's about us over there, shirt.

432
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Speaker 5: Off, I'm in perimenopause. It's hot.

433
00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:39,439
Speaker 2: Okay, well, we have to get you estrogen and progesterone.

434
00:18:39,680 --> 00:18:39,960
Speaker 5: Please.

435
00:18:40,040 --> 00:18:40,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

436
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Speaker 3: Nobody in my apartment wanted my vagina, not even the lesbians,

437
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:46,600
Speaker 3: So that's why it was okay for me to take

438
00:18:46,640 --> 00:18:47,200
Speaker 3: my shirt off.

439
00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:47,520
Speaker 5: Yeah.

440
00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:49,919
Speaker 2: But yeah, yeah, I have a video that I'm probably

441
00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:50,840
Speaker 2: gonna post post it.

442
00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:53,960
Speaker 3: No no, no, no, make sure AI my stomach now because

443
00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:54,200
Speaker 3: I didn't.

444
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:55,760
Speaker 5: I thought I was a lot fitit than that. Do

445
00:18:55,880 --> 00:18:56,280
Speaker 5: me a favor.

446
00:18:56,320 --> 00:18:57,399
Speaker 3: You want to go with me to talk to my

447
00:18:57,440 --> 00:19:00,000
Speaker 3: drug guy after this about what gover his house?

448
00:19:00,080 --> 00:19:01,440
Speaker 5: Only smoke out and have some drugs.

449
00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:05,119
Speaker 2: I can't. I have to get a mammogram. You let

450
00:19:05,160 --> 00:19:06,840
Speaker 2: me go, but you get a mamogram to get You

451
00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:08,159
Speaker 2: want to get a mamogram with me?

452
00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:08,919
Speaker 5: Can you add me?

453
00:19:09,119 --> 00:19:11,000
Speaker 2: I don't think that's how it works, but I would

454
00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:15,080
Speaker 2: love to try your name. I mean I could, but

455
00:19:15,160 --> 00:19:16,639
Speaker 2: this isn't my regular hospital.

456
00:19:17,119 --> 00:19:19,640
Speaker 5: Were you just going around putting your titties in other hospital? Yeah?

457
00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:22,639
Speaker 2: Because because I just found something in my shoulder and

458
00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:24,240
Speaker 2: I just want to make sure I get an ultrasound.

459
00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:25,000
Speaker 2: Not a lot, bitch.

460
00:19:25,600 --> 00:19:27,720
Speaker 3: You ain't got time to be having nothing, bitch, I

461
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:31,760
Speaker 3: got to ride your coat tail. I want I want

462
00:19:31,800 --> 00:19:33,640
Speaker 3: you better get your name on the Prayer List, bitch,

463
00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:35,080
Speaker 3: you better ask the Lord removie.

464
00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:37,760
Speaker 2: It's not anything serious. I'm sure it's actually gone now.

465
00:19:37,800 --> 00:19:39,720
Speaker 5: I just want to Yeah, I'll yell it out.

466
00:19:40,119 --> 00:19:42,920
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, anyway, you know, mammogran with me, bitch, I'll

467
00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:44,080
Speaker 3: cut it off, but yeah.

468
00:19:43,880 --> 00:19:46,159
Speaker 2: I mean you could probably come with me and squeeze

469
00:19:46,200 --> 00:19:48,400
Speaker 2: your way in. I mean, do you have a Yeah,

470
00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:50,320
Speaker 2: have you ever? Have you had a mano Graham recently?

471
00:19:50,359 --> 00:19:51,880
Speaker 2: You have to have one every year, you know that, right?

472
00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:53,040
Speaker 5: Yeah, No, I've had.

473
00:19:53,080 --> 00:19:56,240
Speaker 2: I'm with those titties. I can't even imagine what you must.

474
00:19:56,080 --> 00:20:00,080
Speaker 3: Go gotten the same lady three times and she remembers my.

475
00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:03,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, well they're hard to forget. I mean they're massive.

476
00:20:03,840 --> 00:20:05,320
Speaker 3: But I didn't know, but I was like, I didn't

477
00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:06,800
Speaker 3: I don't want to ask. The one was like, you know,

478
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:09,440
Speaker 3: is it appropriate right to be like are you gay? Yeah?

479
00:20:09,480 --> 00:20:10,480
Speaker 2: It is inappropriate to.

480
00:20:10,440 --> 00:20:12,760
Speaker 3: Say, I mean, but I'm like, I wanted to know

481
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:14,240
Speaker 3: because like maybe she I was turning her on?

482
00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:15,080
Speaker 2: Uh huh?

483
00:20:15,119 --> 00:20:17,040
Speaker 3: But what if I asked her that and she wasn't gay?

484
00:20:17,080 --> 00:20:19,640
Speaker 3: It's like, did I look like I'm harassing her?

485
00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:22,880
Speaker 2: So then we were supposed to go dancing last.

486
00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:25,439
Speaker 5: Night, and we're going to go to somebody nowhere is.

487
00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:27,520
Speaker 2: We were going to go dancing. But what happened when

488
00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:29,480
Speaker 2: we got back to Yaminika's was that we ended up

489
00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:33,240
Speaker 2: staying there for about an hour and everyone was so stoned.

490
00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:34,720
Speaker 2: I was stoned. That was great.

491
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:36,359
Speaker 5: We had so many joints in rotation.

492
00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:38,520
Speaker 2: I know, it was really fun. It was really fun.

493
00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:40,560
Speaker 2: But at a certain point, you know, I check out,

494
00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:42,520
Speaker 2: and then it was at around eleven o'clock. I was like,

495
00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:44,600
Speaker 2: it's time to go home. So I didn't go dancing.

496
00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:45,399
Speaker 2: Did you go dancing?

497
00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:46,960
Speaker 5: No? But I went.

498
00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:49,800
Speaker 3: I went to Sherry's after, Oh you did, and we

499
00:20:49,880 --> 00:20:51,640
Speaker 3: played spades Sherry Shepherd?

500
00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:53,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, at her house? Or did you go back to

501
00:20:53,359 --> 00:20:53,760
Speaker 2: the okay?

502
00:20:53,800 --> 00:20:54,320
Speaker 5: Yeah, her house?

503
00:20:54,359 --> 00:20:56,080
Speaker 3: And then I went home and then you know, some

504
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:58,440
Speaker 3: of our friends got high and did somebody had stayed

505
00:20:58,440 --> 00:20:59,680
Speaker 3: my house tonight? Yes?

506
00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:00,400
Speaker 2: Night?

507
00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:00,680
Speaker 5: Oh?

508
00:21:00,800 --> 00:21:03,960
Speaker 2: Really a man? But did you did you have sex?

509
00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:08,600
Speaker 2: She has two cats at her house, so the.

510
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:10,959
Speaker 5: Cat they have to know when a man's coming over.

511
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:11,840
Speaker 5: They got to prepare her.

512
00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:14,720
Speaker 2: She was looking for her cats for about forty minutes

513
00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:17,680
Speaker 2: when we got there. It's not that big of an apartment.

514
00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:19,320
Speaker 3: No, no, no, no, no, my cats. I've trained him not

515
00:21:19,320 --> 00:21:21,200
Speaker 3: to trust white people. So more than one white person

516
00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:22,240
Speaker 3: walking the door, they got to go.

517
00:21:22,359 --> 00:21:24,040
Speaker 2: The cats came the couch.

518
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:26,000
Speaker 5: They was going somewhere looking for freedom.

519
00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:28,000
Speaker 2: The cat came out from out of the couch and

520
00:21:28,160 --> 00:21:31,320
Speaker 2: was running and I'm not exaggerating sixty miles an hour

521
00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:34,159
Speaker 2: into the kitchen. I was like, what the fuck was that?

522
00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:39,199
Speaker 2: And she's like, oh, that's what's his name? Yeah, he was.

523
00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:42,600
Speaker 3: Like he was He said, no, no, no, he you know,

524
00:21:42,800 --> 00:21:46,480
Speaker 3: he heard he heard a lot of passive aggression and

525
00:21:46,520 --> 00:21:48,840
Speaker 3: not taking accountability in the apartment. So he had to

526
00:21:48,880 --> 00:21:52,720
Speaker 3: go and you know, make sure his NAACP CAT card

527
00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:53,880
Speaker 3: was activated.

528
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:57,000
Speaker 2: So with regard moving back to the political situation here,

529
00:21:57,240 --> 00:22:00,479
Speaker 2: because what's going on here? How are you feeling these

530
00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:03,199
Speaker 2: days about everything that's going on? Just America kind of

531
00:22:03,200 --> 00:22:05,040
Speaker 2: got what it deserves. Is that where you are are?

532
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:08,560
Speaker 3: You know, everybody make a big deal. Oh like Kamala,

533
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:09,600
Speaker 3: did she say I told you so?

534
00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:10,280
Speaker 5: Did she say?

535
00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:12,520
Speaker 3: Who cares? I hope she does say I told you so.

536
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:14,760
Speaker 3: I don't know why I would change my name to

537
00:22:14,920 --> 00:22:18,160
Speaker 3: I told you so, Harris. You see what I'm saying.

538
00:22:18,280 --> 00:22:22,879
Speaker 3: Fucker Kamala, I told you so, Harris, because the reality

539
00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:26,159
Speaker 3: is those of us who had common sense knew that

540
00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:28,480
Speaker 3: this was gonna happen. I think what we have to

541
00:22:28,480 --> 00:22:32,720
Speaker 3: be very aware of is that the disease is not

542
00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:37,200
Speaker 3: Donald Trump. The disease is the people that were comfortable

543
00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:40,320
Speaker 3: with somebody who has a spirit that we have watched

544
00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:45,080
Speaker 3: presented itself already in the presidency to then go on

545
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:47,479
Speaker 3: board and say, we do like the fact that he

546
00:22:47,520 --> 00:22:50,000
Speaker 3: wants to get immigrants out, knowing that this was a

547
00:22:50,040 --> 00:22:52,760
Speaker 3: place that was stolen from the Native Americans and is

548
00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:53,960
Speaker 3: built on immigrants.

549
00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:55,680
Speaker 5: We do want him to.

550
00:22:55,640 --> 00:22:58,199
Speaker 3: Get put women back in the times when they couldn't

551
00:22:58,280 --> 00:23:01,200
Speaker 3: knowing how women have contributed to sciety. We do want

552
00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:03,520
Speaker 3: him to put blacks back in a place when they don't,

553
00:23:03,560 --> 00:23:05,840
Speaker 3: knowing to the contributions that black people have made, not

554
00:23:05,880 --> 00:23:08,679
Speaker 3: only to the soil here, but to the progression of

555
00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:11,480
Speaker 3: this country. And it doesn't advantage us at any point

556
00:23:11,480 --> 00:23:13,639
Speaker 3: in time, because we will never have the power that

557
00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:16,320
Speaker 3: we need to really be free in this country.

558
00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:17,520
Speaker 5: They said, with.

559
00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:20,560
Speaker 3: All of that and all of these people who are

560
00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:24,040
Speaker 3: serving the greater good, even though America never serves them,

561
00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:27,600
Speaker 3: we still gonna say fuck you to them because we

562
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:31,240
Speaker 3: want it all only to realize that this country that

563
00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:35,000
Speaker 3: has been built on white supremacy and under the guise

564
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:39,600
Speaker 3: of racism being strong, is really a society about classism.

565
00:23:40,160 --> 00:23:41,879
Speaker 3: So at the end of the day, once they have

566
00:23:42,160 --> 00:23:46,760
Speaker 3: separated the largest group at the bottom and divided us

567
00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:52,159
Speaker 3: across boards, now it's easy to take over everything because

568
00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:53,960
Speaker 3: you don't have the power of black people.

569
00:23:54,040 --> 00:23:56,880
Speaker 5: Right now, we are tired. What do we like?

570
00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:59,800
Speaker 3: We've been dealing with this shit time and time again,

571
00:24:00,320 --> 00:24:02,800
Speaker 3: and no matter how many times we put ourselves in

572
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:04,960
Speaker 3: an environment whit with white people and have white friends,

573
00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:07,240
Speaker 3: we keep saying this is our plight. It's still kind

574
00:24:07,240 --> 00:24:10,239
Speaker 3: of like, oh, you know, but now white people have

575
00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:13,399
Speaker 3: to see the same shit. And I don't have time

576
00:24:13,760 --> 00:24:17,399
Speaker 3: to be holding white people's hands into oppression.

577
00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:18,720
Speaker 5: I don't have time.

578
00:24:18,840 --> 00:24:19,760
Speaker 2: Can you believe it?

579
00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,520
Speaker 5: Can you? But what is happening? I don't know.

580
00:24:23,040 --> 00:24:26,000
Speaker 3: When we kept saying stop killing black people and black

581
00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:28,919
Speaker 3: lives matter, people are like, oh, no, it's all lives.

582
00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:32,400
Speaker 3: We're we're not saying black lives because we don't think

583
00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:35,280
Speaker 3: it's all lives. We're saying black lives because you don't

584
00:24:35,320 --> 00:24:37,359
Speaker 3: know that black lives matter, but then you want to

585
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:39,640
Speaker 3: gaslight us into believing that we're trying.

586
00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:41,240
Speaker 5: To be this. You know, they want to be better,

587
00:24:41,240 --> 00:24:42,879
Speaker 5: they want to know, we just want to be a

588
00:24:42,920 --> 00:24:44,679
Speaker 5: part of But I.

589
00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:46,679
Speaker 2: Think a lot of white people do understand that, and

590
00:24:46,720 --> 00:24:48,879
Speaker 2: there's a group of people that don't understand that.

591
00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:51,560
Speaker 3: It's not all blanket. You can't no, no, no, let me

592
00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:54,040
Speaker 3: black people or white people, let me, let me, let

593
00:24:54,080 --> 00:24:56,640
Speaker 3: me pull let me let's no, no no. I will say that.

594
00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:59,919
Speaker 3: I will say that because what happens is when somebody

595
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:01,359
Speaker 3: tells you how they hurt.

596
00:25:01,640 --> 00:25:04,760
Speaker 5: Right, we're talking in general. A person says how they hurt.

597
00:25:05,880 --> 00:25:09,680
Speaker 3: You can either listen and go, how can I help

598
00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:12,600
Speaker 3: you not have that hurt? Right, and that's very centered

599
00:25:12,640 --> 00:25:15,640
Speaker 3: around that person, or they can tell you how they're

600
00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:18,400
Speaker 3: hurt and you can go, I didn't cause that hurt.

601
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:18,840
Speaker 2: Uh huh.

602
00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:22,160
Speaker 3: Whether you cause it or not has nothing to do

603
00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:26,080
Speaker 3: with the fact that this person is hurting. So when

604
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:29,399
Speaker 3: we have a conversation, especially as a black woman, and

605
00:25:29,440 --> 00:25:32,800
Speaker 3: I go, as a black woman, this is what's happening

606
00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:35,119
Speaker 3: to me, and I'll have men go, well, I don't know,

607
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:37,359
Speaker 3: as a woman, and maybe certain things as a woman,

608
00:25:37,400 --> 00:25:40,159
Speaker 3: white women can relate to, and then they appreciate. Then

609
00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:42,440
Speaker 3: there's parts that white women will not relate to because

610
00:25:42,440 --> 00:25:44,960
Speaker 3: it's a problem as a black person, and then those

611
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:48,679
Speaker 3: things come together as a black woman. And if I

612
00:25:48,840 --> 00:25:52,359
Speaker 3: say to a white woman, here's what's going on, and

613
00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:54,240
Speaker 3: that white woman says, well, you know it's not me,

614
00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:58,720
Speaker 3: it's like, okay, bitch, it ain't you. But I still

615
00:25:58,760 --> 00:26:01,160
Speaker 3: got this shit going on. So how am I gonna

616
00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:04,800
Speaker 3: help it? And we gotta stop this people being defensive

617
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:09,160
Speaker 3: when somebody says this is what's happening. Because it doesn't

618
00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:12,320
Speaker 3: matter whether you support a whether you not all white people.

619
00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:14,800
Speaker 3: We can only say not all white people. If it

620
00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:17,840
Speaker 3: was like Donald Trump didn't becoming it was enough white people.

621
00:26:18,200 --> 00:26:20,880
Speaker 3: And because it's enough white people, and we keep saying

622
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:23,720
Speaker 3: not all white people, we ain't focused on how many

623
00:26:23,880 --> 00:26:27,520
Speaker 3: fucking white people fucked up, how many fucking white women

624
00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:31,680
Speaker 3: fucked up, how many fucking people of color fucked up

625
00:26:32,080 --> 00:26:34,399
Speaker 3: just because they thought they weren't the people of color

626
00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:37,639
Speaker 3: that were gonna be disenfranchised even further. So I'm not

627
00:26:37,760 --> 00:26:41,000
Speaker 3: here to give any grace to how anybody feels about

628
00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:43,680
Speaker 3: what I'm telling you about what's fucking happening, because when

629
00:26:43,720 --> 00:26:44,400
Speaker 3: we play this.

630
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:46,119
Speaker 5: Game, we have a dictator.

631
00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:49,800
Speaker 3: Well said, I know she wants to eat my pussy

632
00:26:49,840 --> 00:26:51,600
Speaker 3: after that, look at her and I saw a little

633
00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:53,000
Speaker 3: nipple coming out of the little shirt.

634
00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:54,600
Speaker 5: Bitch.

635
00:26:55,119 --> 00:26:56,880
Speaker 2: We're gonna take a break and we'll be right back

636
00:26:56,920 --> 00:27:04,480
Speaker 2: with Y'allmnika, Okay, we're back with Yaminika Sonders. First of all,

637
00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:07,520
Speaker 2: follow her on Instagram. She gets banned a lot on Instagram.

638
00:27:09,280 --> 00:27:10,040
Speaker 2: She gets shadowed.

639
00:27:10,200 --> 00:27:11,960
Speaker 5: Chelsea was like, I was trying to watch something. Where

640
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:13,920
Speaker 5: are you? I'm like, girl, they took me down again?

641
00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:16,320
Speaker 2: How do they? How do they do that? What did

642
00:27:16,359 --> 00:27:18,000
Speaker 2: they do? They tell you why.

643
00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:20,159
Speaker 5: Because I started saying cracker, it's done, it's done. You

644
00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:21,200
Speaker 5: can say nigga all day.

645
00:27:21,119 --> 00:27:23,960
Speaker 3: Long, but crack of white people, Like remember when white

646
00:27:23,960 --> 00:27:25,760
Speaker 3: women were like Karen is the inward.

647
00:27:25,400 --> 00:27:26,480
Speaker 5: We're like, what, bitch?

648
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:29,200
Speaker 2: I like being called a cracker. I'm not going to

649
00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:31,879
Speaker 2: pretend I don't. I fucking like it. It's funny. You know,

650
00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:34,080
Speaker 2: I was in South Africa with my sister once and

651
00:27:34,119 --> 00:27:36,399
Speaker 2: we had this kind of guide in South Africa, and

652
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:40,199
Speaker 2: you know, the racism is thick, thick there and we

653
00:27:40,240 --> 00:27:42,000
Speaker 2: had this guy who was kind of like giving us

654
00:27:42,040 --> 00:27:44,159
Speaker 2: his version. He's a white man. He was giving us

655
00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:46,160
Speaker 2: his version of like what happened the history of South

656
00:27:46,200 --> 00:27:48,760
Speaker 2: Africa with the Dutch and the English and la la la,

657
00:27:49,040 --> 00:27:52,399
Speaker 2: and he you know, his version was an an after.

658
00:27:54,040 --> 00:27:56,879
Speaker 2: I hated. I hated this guy from the minute I

659
00:27:56,920 --> 00:27:59,840
Speaker 2: met him. I just my sister knew. She's like, you've

660
00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:02,840
Speaker 2: my sisters. She was just like, oh, you're not gonna.

661
00:28:02,840 --> 00:28:04,199
Speaker 2: I didn't like the way he looked at and like

662
00:28:04,200 --> 00:28:06,680
Speaker 2: his body. I didn't like his clothing. I was like, oh,

663
00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:08,240
Speaker 2: this guy is shut down.

664
00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:09,760
Speaker 5: You don't like who you get quiet.

665
00:28:09,800 --> 00:28:11,920
Speaker 2: I don't like it, and I have no poker face.

666
00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:15,080
Speaker 2: I can't. And as soon as he walked away, my

667
00:28:15,160 --> 00:28:17,800
Speaker 2: sister looked at me and she goes, that's he's the

668
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:24,560
Speaker 2: reason why black people came up with the word cracker. Okay,

669
00:28:24,560 --> 00:28:26,520
Speaker 2: we're gonna take some callers. We're giving advice.

670
00:28:27,080 --> 00:28:28,320
Speaker 7: Are you ready for the Zamnica?

671
00:28:28,480 --> 00:28:30,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, she's ready. She's ready.

672
00:28:30,480 --> 00:28:30,680
Speaker 1: Yeah.

673
00:28:31,720 --> 00:28:33,399
Speaker 5: I don't think they are, but it's good.

674
00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:35,359
Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, is anyone ready?

675
00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:40,560
Speaker 7: So our first caller is Alicia. She says, Dear Chelsea.

676
00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:42,800
Speaker 1: I'm a thirty nine year old stay at home mom

677
00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:45,800
Speaker 1: to a fifteen month old son who is just a cutie.

678
00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:47,960
Speaker 1: I like to make her doze with my vape pen

679
00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:51,080
Speaker 1: and enjoy gummies regularly. I kept smoking it as it's

680
00:28:51,080 --> 00:28:53,040
Speaker 1: the worst way to consume, but since I have been

681
00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:55,200
Speaker 1: a cannabis user my entire life, I feel like it's

682
00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:58,440
Speaker 1: part of who I am. Lately, I've been contemplating whether

683
00:28:58,520 --> 00:29:01,160
Speaker 1: it's serving me I go. I'm thinking it's great, it's

684
00:29:01,160 --> 00:29:03,920
Speaker 1: not a problem. I enjoy the creativity it provides, and

685
00:29:03,960 --> 00:29:06,640
Speaker 1: I feel like I understand my son better when I'm high.

686
00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:08,760
Speaker 1: But then I think about the fact that I'm high

687
00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:11,360
Speaker 1: all day long and figure it can't be that healthy.

688
00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:14,080
Speaker 1: So when I try to wait until after twelve PM

689
00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:17,040
Speaker 1: or after five pm, I always negotiate with myself and

690
00:29:17,160 --> 00:29:20,600
Speaker 1: end up vaping. The worst part is my husband doesn't

691
00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:23,280
Speaker 1: know I'm high all day. He just thinks I use

692
00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:25,760
Speaker 1: it at night. He has an office studio in the backyard,

693
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:27,800
Speaker 1: so he's home all day but not in sides. It's

694
00:29:27,880 --> 00:29:29,520
Speaker 1: very easy for me to hide it from him, but

695
00:29:29,640 --> 00:29:31,720
Speaker 1: I hate the fact that I'm even hiding it at all.

696
00:29:32,240 --> 00:29:34,440
Speaker 1: I live in an area where it's easily accessible and

697
00:29:34,440 --> 00:29:36,440
Speaker 1: not considered it a big deal. But because I use

698
00:29:36,480 --> 00:29:39,120
Speaker 1: it so frequently, I often wake up feeling groggy or

699
00:29:39,160 --> 00:29:42,200
Speaker 1: just met and feel like I'm doing something wrong. I

700
00:29:42,240 --> 00:29:43,880
Speaker 1: know I'm not addicted, because when I go out of

701
00:29:43,920 --> 00:29:45,920
Speaker 1: town or i'm somewhere, I can't bring my pen. It's

702
00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:48,760
Speaker 1: not a problem, but I'm having serious trouble only consuming

703
00:29:48,800 --> 00:29:51,080
Speaker 1: it at night and staying sober during the day. As

704
00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:53,320
Speaker 1: a regular user, yourself, what do you think about this?

705
00:29:53,520 --> 00:29:54,920
Speaker 1: Do I have a problem? Alisha?

706
00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:59,040
Speaker 2: Hi? Aleisha, Wow, she's right there.

707
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:06,880
Speaker 5: You're right. That was like a novel. No, it was beautiful.

708
00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:10,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, because you know, America's not doing well in literacy

709
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:12,080
Speaker 3: right now, so we need to put you out the

710
00:30:12,120 --> 00:30:12,800
Speaker 3: in full front.

711
00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:16,680
Speaker 5: So I'm saying, smoke, keep smoking.

712
00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:19,440
Speaker 2: I would say if you're having feelings like that, though,

713
00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:22,240
Speaker 2: if you're having feelings about smoking, if you can smoke

714
00:30:22,240 --> 00:30:24,040
Speaker 2: in your care, free about it, and you're not worried

715
00:30:24,040 --> 00:30:26,440
Speaker 2: about it and overthinking about it, then that's one thing.

716
00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:29,080
Speaker 2: But it sounds like you're you're definitely worried about the

717
00:30:29,160 --> 00:30:31,760
Speaker 2: amount that you're consuming and that you're consuming it all day,

718
00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:35,200
Speaker 2: and that you're not hiding it from your husband and

719
00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:37,920
Speaker 2: and like everything you're saying sounds like you just have

720
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:42,400
Speaker 2: a really bad habit of smoking it too frequently. The

721
00:30:42,480 --> 00:30:45,280
Speaker 2: problem with smoking weed too much is that it doesn't

722
00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:47,400
Speaker 2: give you the buzz that you get when you when

723
00:30:47,440 --> 00:30:50,480
Speaker 2: you take breaks, like when you smoke it less frequently,

724
00:30:50,880 --> 00:30:53,000
Speaker 2: there's a better buzz. Like if I get high all

725
00:30:53,080 --> 00:30:55,320
Speaker 2: day long, I become a little bit dead in the head.

726
00:30:55,520 --> 00:30:57,200
Speaker 2: That's not my idea of a good time. I like

727
00:30:57,240 --> 00:31:00,440
Speaker 2: to have a joint or smoke weed, you know, at night.

728
00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:02,800
Speaker 2: Like there are days where I smoke all day long.

729
00:31:02,840 --> 00:31:04,560
Speaker 2: If I'm skiing in Whistler and I have, you know,

730
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:06,720
Speaker 2: a pipe, and I'm like, okay, I'll just take hits

731
00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:09,400
Speaker 2: of it all day long. But over more, it's not

732
00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:11,880
Speaker 2: a great habit all day long, every day. That's just

733
00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:14,040
Speaker 2: not the best use of your time. You can always

734
00:31:14,080 --> 00:31:16,720
Speaker 2: reward yourself in the evening. You don't have to deprive yourself.

735
00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:19,240
Speaker 2: But I would say to create a new habit around

736
00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:22,560
Speaker 2: your son, kind of respecting your relationship with your son.

737
00:31:22,760 --> 00:31:24,360
Speaker 2: He doesn't need his mom to be high to be

738
00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:27,720
Speaker 2: around him. That's what you're saying, But it's a little

739
00:31:27,760 --> 00:31:29,120
Speaker 2: bit what you're saying.

740
00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:30,600
Speaker 7: And it's just better.

741
00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:32,360
Speaker 2: I mean it's better. It's not the right word.

742
00:31:32,400 --> 00:31:35,880
Speaker 9: It's just it's creates an environment of just a relax

743
00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:38,280
Speaker 9: like fun. If he's like a little FESSI I'm just

744
00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:42,400
Speaker 9: like not important, you know. So I just feel like

745
00:31:42,520 --> 00:31:45,719
Speaker 9: it creates a positive environment. Even though, yeah, there, I

746
00:31:45,800 --> 00:31:47,760
Speaker 9: do think that it's not a good idea to be

747
00:31:47,840 --> 00:31:50,800
Speaker 9: high all day. The trouble I have is just stopping

748
00:31:50,840 --> 00:31:53,880
Speaker 9: through the day because once I start that first morning hit,

749
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:56,280
Speaker 9: then it's like a snowball effect.

750
00:31:56,480 --> 00:31:58,760
Speaker 2: Of course, I've been there, I know exactly what you're

751
00:31:58,800 --> 00:32:00,920
Speaker 2: talking about. I would say to put your vapens away

752
00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:03,320
Speaker 2: until six o'clock at night. I would say to just

753
00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:06,840
Speaker 2: experiment with that. Make it a rule for a week

754
00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:10,160
Speaker 2: to just not smoke during the day. You can do it.

755
00:32:10,520 --> 00:32:13,080
Speaker 2: You have power within you to make that decision and

756
00:32:13,120 --> 00:32:15,800
Speaker 2: to follow through and just have it at night. And

757
00:32:15,880 --> 00:32:18,560
Speaker 2: I honestly think you're going to enjoy it more so

758
00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:20,840
Speaker 2: at night and you're starting going to start. The first

759
00:32:20,840 --> 00:32:22,760
Speaker 2: couple of days are going to be difficult, but it's

760
00:32:22,800 --> 00:32:24,960
Speaker 2: not going to be difficult after that. If you want

761
00:32:24,960 --> 00:32:27,040
Speaker 2: to be present for your son, I know you do.

762
00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:29,400
Speaker 2: That's what we're talking. We're here to talk about if

763
00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:31,760
Speaker 2: you want to be present for your son you don't have.

764
00:32:31,960 --> 00:32:34,080
Speaker 2: This is just so you know when you have a child,

765
00:32:34,160 --> 00:32:35,920
Speaker 2: this is also going to come up for you. You know,

766
00:32:35,960 --> 00:32:38,040
Speaker 2: you're not gonna be able to smoke weed all or

767
00:32:38,080 --> 00:32:39,880
Speaker 2: you will be well, you'll just do whatever you want.

768
00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:40,280
Speaker 5: I know.

769
00:32:40,720 --> 00:32:44,120
Speaker 3: I'm just watching you and an awe, like, the information

770
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:45,680
Speaker 3: you're giving is amazing.

771
00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:48,400
Speaker 2: Well, I think that you and I think that it's

772
00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:50,080
Speaker 2: just a good it's a it's a good example to

773
00:32:50,080 --> 00:32:52,440
Speaker 2: set for yourself and for your and for your child.

774
00:32:52,680 --> 00:32:55,560
Speaker 2: And you should also let your husband know. Hey, you

775
00:32:55,600 --> 00:32:57,680
Speaker 2: know what, I'm only going to smoke weed after six

776
00:32:57,680 --> 00:32:59,520
Speaker 2: o'clock from now on. I've decided that's what I'm going

777
00:32:59,600 --> 00:33:01,080
Speaker 2: to do. Some times I pick up a pen during

778
00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:03,200
Speaker 2: the day and just get through the phase of that,

779
00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:05,640
Speaker 2: get through a phase of creating a new habit. And

780
00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:08,440
Speaker 2: once you are through that phase, once you go like

781
00:33:08,560 --> 00:33:12,080
Speaker 2: thirty days of just doing it after six pm, then

782
00:33:12,280 --> 00:33:14,320
Speaker 2: every once in a while, if you if there's a

783
00:33:14,400 --> 00:33:16,880
Speaker 2: moment that's so stressful during the day and you're like,

784
00:33:16,920 --> 00:33:18,760
Speaker 2: oh God, I could use a hit, you can use

785
00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:21,800
Speaker 2: it incrementally, but you have to understand the slippery slope.

786
00:33:21,800 --> 00:33:23,600
Speaker 2: When we take one hit and your home all day

787
00:33:23,600 --> 00:33:25,520
Speaker 2: with your kid, You're going to take another hit, and

788
00:33:25,560 --> 00:33:27,000
Speaker 2: you're going to take another one, and you're going to

789
00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:29,240
Speaker 2: take another one. Right, So it's up to you to

790
00:33:29,280 --> 00:33:32,000
Speaker 2: rehabituate your life and you're going to be better for it,

791
00:33:32,040 --> 00:33:33,440
Speaker 2: and you're going to be a better parent. You're going

792
00:33:33,520 --> 00:33:36,000
Speaker 2: to feel better about yourself. The reason you're calling is

793
00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:39,040
Speaker 2: because you're having misgivings about the way that you're using.

794
00:33:39,200 --> 00:33:40,640
Speaker 8: Can I think it's a problem.

795
00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:44,040
Speaker 2: So if you think that it is, oh, look are

796
00:33:44,080 --> 00:33:45,600
Speaker 2: you okay?

797
00:33:45,840 --> 00:33:46,320
Speaker 5: Right?

798
00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:47,040
Speaker 8: Right?

799
00:33:47,600 --> 00:33:49,280
Speaker 2: So I would just say that you don't have to

800
00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:53,400
Speaker 2: like quit marijuana, just use it more sparingly and be

801
00:33:53,480 --> 00:33:55,959
Speaker 2: more discerning about when you want to get high. You know,

802
00:33:56,040 --> 00:33:58,560
Speaker 2: it should be fun, it should be a celebration. When

803
00:33:58,560 --> 00:34:00,840
Speaker 2: I smoke weed all day, I'm not laughing. I'm not

804
00:34:00,880 --> 00:34:02,600
Speaker 2: having the best time. I eventually just want to go

805
00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:05,440
Speaker 2: to sleep at seven. Like it's not it's not helpful

806
00:34:05,480 --> 00:34:07,960
Speaker 2: to smoke weed all day, but it's it's really fun.

807
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:10,840
Speaker 2: Like last night, I we came, I had a joint.

808
00:34:10,880 --> 00:34:13,239
Speaker 2: I can't travel with wheed anymore because I'm so paranoid

809
00:34:13,600 --> 00:34:16,640
Speaker 2: about getting you know, pulled over or stopped at TSA

810
00:34:16,719 --> 00:34:18,920
Speaker 2: because everyone knows how much I love drugs. You know,

811
00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:23,640
Speaker 2: it's very public. So uh and my whole new set

812
00:34:23,680 --> 00:34:26,280
Speaker 2: is about everywhere I take drugs, so I have to stop.

813
00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:29,400
Speaker 2: I've basically told on myself. So I'm with you. I

814
00:34:29,440 --> 00:34:32,799
Speaker 2: totally understand and I get you, and but I would

815
00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:34,520
Speaker 2: advise you to do that, and you can do it.

816
00:34:34,880 --> 00:34:37,720
Speaker 2: You cannot smoke sweed until six pm. You're completely capable

817
00:34:37,760 --> 00:34:39,439
Speaker 2: of doing that. I have no doubt in my mind.

818
00:34:39,840 --> 00:34:41,800
Speaker 10: I think I need like a lock box or something,

819
00:34:42,080 --> 00:34:44,480
Speaker 10: because I say, they have like little lock boxes you

820
00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:46,560
Speaker 10: can get for your cell phone and you just like

821
00:34:46,640 --> 00:34:49,000
Speaker 10: put them in there, set your little timer for whenever

822
00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:50,680
Speaker 10: you want, and like the are you gonna go to

823
00:34:50,719 --> 00:34:51,480
Speaker 10: the store and get more?

824
00:34:51,520 --> 00:34:53,080
Speaker 7: Probably not, like you're gonna wait.

825
00:34:53,760 --> 00:34:55,480
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's a bit of my street.

826
00:34:57,280 --> 00:34:58,480
Speaker 7: Damn it so close?

827
00:34:58,920 --> 00:35:02,239
Speaker 2: What a weed store? Yeah? Oh okay, Well, but I

828
00:35:02,280 --> 00:35:04,920
Speaker 2: also think, like have some accountability, like tell your husband

829
00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:06,560
Speaker 2: so that you can be accountable, you know what I mean,

830
00:35:06,680 --> 00:35:08,680
Speaker 2: Just say hey, I'm gonna give I'm gonna give you

831
00:35:08,680 --> 00:35:10,800
Speaker 2: my vayepen. I don't want it until six o'clock. Okay,

832
00:35:10,920 --> 00:35:11,640
Speaker 2: just hold it for me.

833
00:35:12,040 --> 00:35:13,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I don't even think you need a tattle

834
00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:16,000
Speaker 1: on yourself or what you have been doing. Just now, like, hey,

835
00:35:16,000 --> 00:35:18,200
Speaker 1: this has been tempting me, so like just keep it

836
00:35:18,200 --> 00:35:19,680
Speaker 1: in your office until six or whatever.

837
00:35:19,760 --> 00:35:21,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, then you're a winner all the way around.

838
00:35:21,600 --> 00:35:21,839
Speaker 5: Yeah.

839
00:35:21,880 --> 00:35:24,040
Speaker 9: I would hate it if he saw me and I

840
00:35:24,040 --> 00:35:26,319
Speaker 9: didn't realize and like it became an issue because I

841
00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:28,000
Speaker 9: don't want to lie to him or him to be.

842
00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:29,160
Speaker 7: Like, what are you doing all day?

843
00:35:29,480 --> 00:35:31,680
Speaker 9: I think you would think I'm extremely irresponsible.

844
00:35:32,480 --> 00:35:33,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you're not.

845
00:35:33,840 --> 00:35:34,080
Speaker 10: You're not.

846
00:35:34,360 --> 00:35:34,600
Speaker 5: You're not.

847
00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:38,920
Speaker 2: Don't yourself up about it. Just just make a new habit.

848
00:35:39,480 --> 00:35:41,160
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, okay.

849
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:46,319
Speaker 9: Okay, thanks so much, ladies. Thanks, okay, bye.

850
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:48,480
Speaker 2: I just want to make a note that Yamandika's advice

851
00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:52,319
Speaker 2: was to continue to smoke weed with her baby. Take

852
00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:53,520
Speaker 2: make sure that's on record.

853
00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:56,719
Speaker 3: No no, no, no, no no oh yeah yah okay, But

854
00:35:56,760 --> 00:36:00,000
Speaker 3: what I'm saying is to be fair, I was very

855
00:36:00,160 --> 00:36:02,520
Speaker 3: pressed with you, m thank you.

856
00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:04,520
Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying, Like the information you gave

857
00:36:04,640 --> 00:36:05,440
Speaker 5: was so thoughtful.

858
00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:07,279
Speaker 7: She's good at this, Yaminika.

859
00:36:07,520 --> 00:36:09,320
Speaker 5: I know I need just at tuning in. Why you

860
00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:10,480
Speaker 5: don't ever give me advice like.

861
00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:15,919
Speaker 2: This because you don't fucking listen. First of all, remember, yeah, yeah,

862
00:36:15,960 --> 00:36:16,960
Speaker 2: I get it, Okay.

863
00:36:16,840 --> 00:36:21,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, Well our next caller is Ali and Yaminika.

864
00:36:21,080 --> 00:36:22,640
Speaker 7: You're an oldest sister, right.

865
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:26,239
Speaker 5: Yes, I have. I have three half sisters. We share

866
00:36:26,320 --> 00:36:27,400
Speaker 5: same father.

867
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:29,279
Speaker 1: Yes, all right, this is a little bit about having

868
00:36:29,360 --> 00:36:32,760
Speaker 1: to take care of your sisters, so Ali says, Dear Chelsea.

869
00:36:33,320 --> 00:36:35,320
Speaker 1: I've been a fan for longer than I care to admit,

870
00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:38,520
Speaker 1: because it will aige us both either way. I'm emailing because,

871
00:36:38,640 --> 00:36:40,920
Speaker 1: like you, I lost a brother at a young age,

872
00:36:40,920 --> 00:36:43,480
Speaker 1: and it's impacted my family for years in different ways.

873
00:36:43,960 --> 00:36:47,040
Speaker 7: I'm the youngest of four. My sister, who's ten years older.

874
00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:49,800
Speaker 1: Has continually made bad decisions in the years that have followed,

875
00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:51,960
Speaker 1: and I've always been the one to hold things together

876
00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:54,720
Speaker 1: for our family. This past year was the final straw

877
00:36:54,800 --> 00:36:57,319
Speaker 1: when she fell prey to a bitcoin scam and my

878
00:36:57,440 --> 00:37:00,880
Speaker 1: parents bailed her out to keep her out of jail. Honestly,

879
00:37:01,120 --> 00:37:03,160
Speaker 1: I'm tired of being the one to keep shit together.

880
00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:05,560
Speaker 1: I want to finally break this cycle and figure out

881
00:37:05,600 --> 00:37:07,640
Speaker 1: how to move forward with her while staying true to

882
00:37:07,640 --> 00:37:10,719
Speaker 1: my own boundaries to protect myself and my kids. I

883
00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:12,880
Speaker 1: promise I will get a therapist toe and not just

884
00:37:12,920 --> 00:37:14,960
Speaker 1: rely on the show, but I would love your advice.

885
00:37:15,040 --> 00:37:15,320
Speaker 5: Ali.

886
00:37:16,000 --> 00:37:20,719
Speaker 2: Hi, alliw hi, so nice to see you. Nice to

887
00:37:20,719 --> 00:37:23,360
Speaker 2: see you too. This is our special guest, Yamnika Saunders

888
00:37:23,400 --> 00:37:24,000
Speaker 2: is here today.

889
00:37:24,120 --> 00:37:25,160
Speaker 5: Hi allie Hi.

890
00:37:26,760 --> 00:37:29,960
Speaker 2: That's such a bummer that your sister is so susceptible

891
00:37:30,000 --> 00:37:32,640
Speaker 2: to all of that and that fell for a bitcoin

892
00:37:32,680 --> 00:37:35,839
Speaker 2: scheme and scam. So what are you thinking about doing

893
00:37:35,880 --> 00:37:37,400
Speaker 2: you want to cut her off or what? I like,

894
00:37:37,480 --> 00:37:38,600
Speaker 2: where are you right now?

895
00:37:38,880 --> 00:37:41,279
Speaker 8: Well, like I said in my email, I did seek

896
00:37:41,280 --> 00:37:45,520
Speaker 8: a therapist and she has been truly wonderful, Like has

897
00:37:45,560 --> 00:37:48,960
Speaker 8: really helped me navigate the complex relationships not only between

898
00:37:49,040 --> 00:37:51,839
Speaker 8: my sister and my parents, and kind of my brother too,

899
00:37:52,120 --> 00:37:54,799
Speaker 8: as you know, like after losing a brother, everybody is

900
00:37:54,800 --> 00:37:57,440
Speaker 8: affected in different ways. But yeah, so I think she

901
00:37:57,560 --> 00:38:01,160
Speaker 8: has really helped me in understanding how we all got

902
00:38:01,160 --> 00:38:04,200
Speaker 8: to the point that we're at. I don't think I'm

903
00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:07,520
Speaker 8: ready to cut them all out. Definitely still on the table,

904
00:38:07,719 --> 00:38:10,000
Speaker 8: but at this point not really because we don't really

905
00:38:10,000 --> 00:38:12,279
Speaker 8: have a lot of family around here. My husband's from

906
00:38:12,280 --> 00:38:16,239
Speaker 8: the UK, so like they are our family so it's complicated,

907
00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:17,319
Speaker 8: see as you know.

908
00:38:18,080 --> 00:38:20,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I think that, like I don't know

909
00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:22,920
Speaker 2: that there's a necessary it's necessary to do anything in

910
00:38:22,960 --> 00:38:26,320
Speaker 2: this moment, Like I think considering that your family history

911
00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:28,640
Speaker 2: and everything you're saying, like, most parents aren't going to

912
00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:31,160
Speaker 2: bail their kid out when when that happens, And just

913
00:38:31,239 --> 00:38:33,919
Speaker 2: because she's made some bad decisions doesn't mean that she's

914
00:38:34,040 --> 00:38:36,040
Speaker 2: worth cutting out of your life. You want to really

915
00:38:36,040 --> 00:38:37,880
Speaker 2: build and it sounds like you're already doing that with

916
00:38:37,960 --> 00:38:42,000
Speaker 2: your therapist. Build an understanding and empathy and compassion for

917
00:38:42,120 --> 00:38:44,680
Speaker 2: the fact that she's experiencing life in a different way

918
00:38:44,680 --> 00:38:47,160
Speaker 2: than you are, that she's not as responsible as you are.

919
00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:48,960
Speaker 2: You know, like we all have a lot of judgment

920
00:38:49,000 --> 00:38:50,960
Speaker 2: when people don't act the way that we do. You know,

921
00:38:51,120 --> 00:38:53,000
Speaker 2: certain people I know I do. I have a real

922
00:38:53,040 --> 00:38:55,640
Speaker 2: problem with judging others when I think they make stupid

923
00:38:55,680 --> 00:38:58,799
Speaker 2: decisions or they're not looking after themselves. But it's really

924
00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:01,839
Speaker 2: not your job to be police everyone. Sometimes showing up

925
00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:04,480
Speaker 2: with extra love and doubling down on love and kindness

926
00:39:04,640 --> 00:39:07,560
Speaker 2: helps people get out of rots too. So there's another way,

927
00:39:07,680 --> 00:39:09,680
Speaker 2: like an avenue to go about it. What do you

928
00:39:09,719 --> 00:39:10,880
Speaker 2: I mean, what do you think.

929
00:39:10,800 --> 00:39:14,120
Speaker 3: I've had a situation like that. Not to get too

930
00:39:14,200 --> 00:39:16,720
Speaker 3: much into my own personal you know, because it involves

931
00:39:16,880 --> 00:39:20,120
Speaker 3: with my family. I'll use this one example with my mother.

932
00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:23,239
Speaker 3: My mother, I can tell her a thousand times I

933
00:39:23,239 --> 00:39:25,960
Speaker 3: don't want her to do something because I don't want

934
00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:29,680
Speaker 3: it to hurt her, you know, disadvantage her. I know

935
00:39:29,719 --> 00:39:32,359
Speaker 3: what the result of that's going to be, and I'm

936
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:37,240
Speaker 3: trying to protect her, and my mother will still go okay,

937
00:39:37,320 --> 00:39:39,640
Speaker 3: let me still be involved with this part and go mom,

938
00:39:39,880 --> 00:39:42,040
Speaker 3: you know we know what's going but you know God

939
00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:48,040
Speaker 3: told me okay. So the boundary is because watching you

940
00:39:48,160 --> 00:39:52,000
Speaker 3: be frustrated by a situation with somebody that I know

941
00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:54,360
Speaker 3: is frustrated is going to frustrate you or take advantage

942
00:39:54,400 --> 00:39:58,200
Speaker 3: of you, and you still are doing that. I can't

943
00:39:58,200 --> 00:40:01,160
Speaker 3: go on that emotional journey with you. I'm gonna be

944
00:40:01,239 --> 00:40:04,359
Speaker 3: here as your daughter. I love you, But when this

945
00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:07,000
Speaker 3: thing blows back on you, like it's done time and

946
00:40:07,040 --> 00:40:10,680
Speaker 3: time again, I'm not your resource to have a conversation

947
00:40:10,760 --> 00:40:13,320
Speaker 3: about how to get over that. So if you're fine

948
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:16,359
Speaker 3: with me not being there for you at all while

949
00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:19,440
Speaker 3: you handle that, continue to do what you do but

950
00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:21,600
Speaker 3: any any point in time that you expect me to

951
00:40:21,640 --> 00:40:25,879
Speaker 3: be emotionally there and supportive with you, my opinion has

952
00:40:25,920 --> 00:40:28,320
Speaker 3: to also matter, and the decisions that you're making.

953
00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:31,400
Speaker 8: No, And I think that makes perfect sense. That's a

954
00:40:31,480 --> 00:40:33,719
Speaker 8: healthy boundary. I think. I mean, like you said, I'm

955
00:40:33,800 --> 00:40:36,359
Speaker 8: learning how to set those with everybody, and I think, yeah,

956
00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:39,000
Speaker 8: that definitely helps, because it's like I've also been reading

957
00:40:39,000 --> 00:40:41,760
Speaker 8: mel Robbin's book about Let Them, and it'sself freaking hard.

958
00:40:42,800 --> 00:40:45,440
Speaker 5: Yes, you're like a very loving person.

959
00:40:45,680 --> 00:40:48,640
Speaker 3: And that's the thing about it, right when you're loving

960
00:40:48,800 --> 00:40:53,279
Speaker 3: and you're because you'll be surprised. Reciprocity in people is

961
00:40:53,320 --> 00:40:56,920
Speaker 3: not given right. And sometimes you'd be like, why would

962
00:40:56,960 --> 00:40:58,960
Speaker 3: somebody do this? I would never do that. I would

963
00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:00,919
Speaker 3: never do this to my per I would never put

964
00:41:01,239 --> 00:41:03,560
Speaker 3: And then some people don't even think like that. And

965
00:41:03,719 --> 00:41:06,879
Speaker 3: if you're thinking for yourself emotionally and for your sister

966
00:41:06,920 --> 00:41:08,759
Speaker 3: and all the nots, just she get you're doing a

967
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:11,920
Speaker 3: lot of emotional thinking and what's left over for you,

968
00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:16,680
Speaker 3: Then you feel taking advantage of right, You feel discredited,

969
00:41:17,040 --> 00:41:21,239
Speaker 3: you feel unheard because you keep yelling to people that no,

970
00:41:22,000 --> 00:41:23,399
Speaker 3: preserve your energy for you.

971
00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:25,839
Speaker 5: You need to preserve some for you, and.

972
00:41:25,760 --> 00:41:28,319
Speaker 3: Your parents love you and they'll be there. But they

973
00:41:28,360 --> 00:41:30,600
Speaker 3: also got another daughter they gotta fucking deal with, and

974
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:34,440
Speaker 3: that's Daybirtha. Not you. You're her sister, You're not her

975
00:41:34,480 --> 00:41:35,360
Speaker 3: mother and her father.

976
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:37,200
Speaker 8: And I think that's fair. I think where some of

977
00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:39,440
Speaker 8: the complication comes in is my parents. Even I'm the

978
00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:42,200
Speaker 8: youngest youngest of the four of us, they expect me

979
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:45,080
Speaker 8: to be the one to kind of help her learn

980
00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:46,919
Speaker 8: right from wrong and like to be the middle person

981
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:49,160
Speaker 8: because I've always been the middle person between my parents

982
00:41:49,200 --> 00:41:51,719
Speaker 8: and my sister. And when I cut myself out of that,

983
00:41:51,760 --> 00:41:54,279
Speaker 8: they were kind of just they were mad at me,

984
00:41:54,400 --> 00:41:55,839
Speaker 8: and I was like, what the hell, Like I'm doing

985
00:41:55,840 --> 00:41:59,839
Speaker 8: the I'm trying to set my own boundaries for myself

986
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:02,440
Speaker 8: my kids, and the fact that they didn't respect that

987
00:42:02,480 --> 00:42:03,359
Speaker 8: really annoyed me too.

988
00:42:03,360 --> 00:42:06,440
Speaker 1: So it's like, anytime you set a healthy boundary, like

989
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:10,399
Speaker 1: the people who benefited from your lack of boundaries are

990
00:42:10,480 --> 00:42:13,600
Speaker 1: going to be upset with that, And like that's kind

991
00:42:13,640 --> 00:42:16,040
Speaker 1: of okay. The other thing I will say is I

992
00:42:16,120 --> 00:42:18,719
Speaker 1: love this idea of like doubling down on love. And

993
00:42:18,800 --> 00:42:22,719
Speaker 1: I'll also just say loving someone doesn't necessarily mean that

994
00:42:22,800 --> 00:42:26,280
Speaker 1: like you're the shield that keeps them from experiencing consequences.

995
00:42:26,560 --> 00:42:27,879
Speaker 7: And it sounds like some of the.

996
00:42:27,800 --> 00:42:31,960
Speaker 1: Boundaries you're putting in place have maybe been active in

997
00:42:32,040 --> 00:42:32,759
Speaker 1: that in that way.

998
00:42:33,160 --> 00:42:35,279
Speaker 8: Yes, absolutely, And I think that's part of it too,

999
00:42:35,400 --> 00:42:38,280
Speaker 8: is like we're all kind of figuring out new roles

1000
00:42:38,320 --> 00:42:40,920
Speaker 8: and dynamics in the family, with me removing myself from that,

1001
00:42:41,320 --> 00:42:44,440
Speaker 8: so navigating kind of where we love too.

1002
00:42:44,719 --> 00:42:48,000
Speaker 3: I want you to understand, Ali, That's also what I'm

1003
00:42:48,000 --> 00:42:51,000
Speaker 3: telling you is the people in the world that will

1004
00:42:51,040 --> 00:42:55,879
Speaker 3: take advantage of kindness and love. You understand. You don't

1005
00:42:55,920 --> 00:42:58,960
Speaker 3: have to stop loving, you have to turn it off,

1006
00:43:00,239 --> 00:43:04,240
Speaker 3: hold it. It doesn't mean respect is not there. Okay,

1007
00:43:04,880 --> 00:43:07,279
Speaker 3: you understand yep, because a lot of people not that

1008
00:43:07,320 --> 00:43:09,839
Speaker 3: I'm against what they're saying. I'm not standing down on this,

1009
00:43:09,880 --> 00:43:13,719
Speaker 3: doubling down on love, love yourself. You can't love everybody,

1010
00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:16,560
Speaker 3: and people will take advantage. Once they've shown you they're

1011
00:43:16,600 --> 00:43:20,160
Speaker 3: taking advantage, You've got to start making decisions that are

1012
00:43:20,200 --> 00:43:24,879
Speaker 3: going to benefit your own mental capacity. Trust me, I'm

1013
00:43:24,920 --> 00:43:29,759
Speaker 3: forty six, I'm perry, menopausal. I've been sweating here and there.

1014
00:43:29,880 --> 00:43:32,399
Speaker 3: I don't give a fuck about nobody right now.

1015
00:43:32,560 --> 00:43:34,880
Speaker 5: You understand it's taking all.

1016
00:43:34,760 --> 00:43:36,680
Speaker 3: In me to give a fuck about you right now

1017
00:43:36,680 --> 00:43:38,000
Speaker 3: because I'm perryman a pausal.

1018
00:43:38,280 --> 00:43:39,759
Speaker 2: She didn't know, by the way, she didn't know she

1019
00:43:39,800 --> 00:43:41,799
Speaker 2: was Perry menopausal, so I told her last night.

1020
00:43:41,920 --> 00:43:46,759
Speaker 3: So but I wish you well, Alli, I see you

1021
00:43:46,800 --> 00:43:48,360
Speaker 3: have such a beautiful spirit.

1022
00:43:48,480 --> 00:43:51,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, and don't lose my love and healthy boundaries are

1023
00:43:51,560 --> 00:43:54,440
Speaker 2: the best because you're not only creating them, you're demonstrating

1024
00:43:54,440 --> 00:43:57,080
Speaker 2: them for other people. Like Catherine said, they're not gonna

1025
00:43:57,120 --> 00:43:59,360
Speaker 2: like it in the beginning, and like you admitted that

1026
00:43:59,400 --> 00:44:02,440
Speaker 2: your parents like it. But you are creating a different

1027
00:44:02,480 --> 00:44:05,560
Speaker 2: dynamic and a different paradigm with your family, and that's

1028
00:44:05,560 --> 00:44:06,720
Speaker 2: more important.

1029
00:44:06,800 --> 00:44:08,240
Speaker 8: Right, And I think that's what I want a model

1030
00:44:08,239 --> 00:44:11,080
Speaker 8: for my kids, right, Like, yes, I want I want

1031
00:44:11,080 --> 00:44:12,880
Speaker 8: them to want to spend time with me as an adult,

1032
00:44:12,920 --> 00:44:15,279
Speaker 8: and I want them to whereas I don't have that

1033
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:17,960
Speaker 8: with my family. It's kind of like an obligation sometimes,

1034
00:44:18,200 --> 00:44:21,240
Speaker 8: And so I want to have better relationships overall.

1035
00:44:21,600 --> 00:44:23,400
Speaker 7: Yeah, well, you're doing the work to get there.

1036
00:44:23,920 --> 00:44:27,840
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yes.

1037
00:44:29,320 --> 00:44:31,359
Speaker 8: Good luck with perimenopause. I'll be there in a few years,

1038
00:44:31,440 --> 00:44:31,839
Speaker 8: I'm sure.

1039
00:44:31,880 --> 00:44:32,200
Speaker 4: Thank you.

1040
00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:34,920
Speaker 5: Bye.

1041
00:44:36,280 --> 00:44:38,320
Speaker 2: I like that you're just going to go around sweating,

1042
00:44:38,480 --> 00:44:41,279
Speaker 2: you know, like in the meantime, like what's stuff? I

1043
00:44:41,320 --> 00:44:44,319
Speaker 2: don't know what to do. I just found you have

1044
00:44:44,480 --> 00:44:47,440
Speaker 2: from me. I diagnosed you last night. You have to

1045
00:44:47,480 --> 00:44:50,400
Speaker 2: go to your OBG. Y N, you have one, right.

1046
00:44:50,600 --> 00:44:51,760
Speaker 5: I'm a vaginanta of course.

1047
00:44:51,840 --> 00:44:52,280
Speaker 2: Okay.

1048
00:44:52,520 --> 00:44:54,279
Speaker 5: Do you think people don't have women they are women

1049
00:44:54,280 --> 00:44:55,000
Speaker 5: that don't have a ob G.

1050
00:44:55,120 --> 00:44:55,400
Speaker 3: I N.

1051
00:44:55,840 --> 00:44:57,920
Speaker 2: I don't know. I mean some people don't. Yeah, some

1052
00:44:57,960 --> 00:45:00,799
Speaker 2: people just don't have doctors that they go to regularly.

1053
00:45:01,080 --> 00:45:04,720
Speaker 5: That's crazy. I'm on my my my charts all the time.

1054
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:07,000
Speaker 2: My brother doesn't go to a doctor ever. Ever, they

1055
00:45:07,040 --> 00:45:08,920
Speaker 2: never Both of my brothers never go. And maybe it's

1056
00:45:08,920 --> 00:45:09,160
Speaker 2: a mail.

1057
00:45:09,360 --> 00:45:11,279
Speaker 5: That's a man thing too. Yeah yeah, yeah. They don't

1058
00:45:11,320 --> 00:45:12,680
Speaker 5: think they need to check out anything.

1059
00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:14,040
Speaker 2: What's next, Catherine?

1060
00:45:14,080 --> 00:45:16,440
Speaker 7: Well, our next question? This one's just an email, not

1061
00:45:16,480 --> 00:45:16,920
Speaker 7: a caller.

1062
00:45:17,120 --> 00:45:19,719
Speaker 1: It's a little bit tricky, but Yaminika, I listened to

1063
00:45:19,800 --> 00:45:23,919
Speaker 1: your conversation with ts Madison about tricky trends questions, which

1064
00:45:24,080 --> 00:45:25,600
Speaker 1: I would really recommend to anyone.

1065
00:45:25,640 --> 00:45:27,000
Speaker 7: It's a great conversation.

1066
00:45:27,200 --> 00:45:30,400
Speaker 2: I learned so much nice. How do people listen to it?

1067
00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:31,320
Speaker 7: It's on YouTube?

1068
00:45:31,360 --> 00:45:34,080
Speaker 1: So just look up TS Madison and Yaminica Saunders and

1069
00:45:34,080 --> 00:45:34,839
Speaker 1: you will find it.

1070
00:45:35,120 --> 00:45:37,520
Speaker 2: And if you want to try and spell Yaminika, good luck.

1071
00:45:37,880 --> 00:45:40,120
Speaker 5: Y A m A any I k A thank you.

1072
00:45:40,320 --> 00:45:43,520
Speaker 1: Yes, so I thought you'd be a perfect person for

1073
00:45:43,560 --> 00:45:46,799
Speaker 1: this question. Okay, Summer says TS. By the way, I

1074
00:45:46,800 --> 00:45:49,440
Speaker 1: love TS Madison, I mean, yes the best.

1075
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:51,360
Speaker 2: And also shout out to Yamaha, which is how I

1076
00:45:51,360 --> 00:45:53,560
Speaker 2: pronounced your first names.

1077
00:45:55,239 --> 00:45:56,000
Speaker 5: Dam Well.

1078
00:45:56,080 --> 00:45:58,839
Speaker 1: The subject line is my ex is a woman now?

1079
00:45:59,000 --> 00:46:02,799
Speaker 1: Am I the asshole for blocking Dear Chelsea? Last week

1080
00:46:02,880 --> 00:46:05,040
Speaker 1: I looked at my blocked profiles and noticed that my

1081
00:46:05,080 --> 00:46:07,279
Speaker 1: ex was no longer on there. I figured they had

1082
00:46:07,280 --> 00:46:09,719
Speaker 1: gotten off of social media. I hadn't talked to them

1083
00:46:09,719 --> 00:46:12,520
Speaker 1: in almost a decade. This morning I saw someone sent

1084
00:46:12,560 --> 00:46:14,920
Speaker 1: me a message request. It was my ex, but I

1085
00:46:14,960 --> 00:46:17,439
Speaker 1: guess they're a transwoman now based on the name change

1086
00:46:17,480 --> 00:46:20,480
Speaker 1: and profile photos. Sorry to message you out of the blue,

1087
00:46:20,480 --> 00:46:22,359
Speaker 1: but I woke up today with the memory that today

1088
00:46:22,480 --> 00:46:24,399
Speaker 1: might be your birthday. If it is, and I hope

1089
00:46:24,400 --> 00:46:27,360
Speaker 1: you have a great day. Btw, it's not my birthday.

1090
00:46:28,160 --> 00:46:30,400
Speaker 1: I don't have fond members of this X. I lost

1091
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:33,120
Speaker 1: my virginity to this person. And not by consent. It

1092
00:46:33,200 --> 00:46:35,840
Speaker 1: was my first serious relationship. We went to high school

1093
00:46:35,880 --> 00:46:38,640
Speaker 1: together and dated in my first year of college. Two

1094
00:46:38,719 --> 00:46:40,880
Speaker 1: years after we broke up, we connected again and I

1095
00:46:40,920 --> 00:46:43,359
Speaker 1: met their wife and two daughters. I liked his wife

1096
00:46:43,360 --> 00:46:45,360
Speaker 1: and daughters, but I got a reminder of why I

1097
00:46:45,400 --> 00:46:48,600
Speaker 1: did not talk to them her and blocked them after

1098
00:46:48,640 --> 00:46:51,279
Speaker 1: a couple of interactions for the next decade. Am I

1099
00:46:51,320 --> 00:46:54,400
Speaker 1: the asshole for wanting to keep blocking their profiles summer?

1100
00:46:54,960 --> 00:46:58,799
Speaker 3: I mean they changed genders, not personality. I mean, what's

1101
00:46:58,840 --> 00:47:00,200
Speaker 3: a dig a dicky?

1102
00:47:00,640 --> 00:47:04,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't understand. If you lost your virginity to

1103
00:47:04,640 --> 00:47:08,040
Speaker 2: them without their your consent, and that that's and then

1104
00:47:08,040 --> 00:47:09,239
Speaker 2: you dated the person.

1105
00:47:09,200 --> 00:47:13,080
Speaker 3: That's a trauma. Sometimes that's a trauma response to an essay.

1106
00:47:13,520 --> 00:47:16,920
Speaker 3: You become victimized and it's a weird. So I feel

1107
00:47:16,920 --> 00:47:19,640
Speaker 3: bad for that, and I understand the trauma. What I'm

1108
00:47:19,680 --> 00:47:23,200
Speaker 3: telling you is, I think this person may think that

1109
00:47:23,280 --> 00:47:26,439
Speaker 3: they're transphobic because they're doing this, Because this has nothing

1110
00:47:26,480 --> 00:47:32,080
Speaker 3: to do with trans an asshole. That's a person nality, right,

1111
00:47:32,440 --> 00:47:33,719
Speaker 3: that's a spirit thing.

1112
00:47:34,160 --> 00:47:35,760
Speaker 5: You can't transition your spirit.

1113
00:47:36,000 --> 00:47:39,239
Speaker 3: You understand you're born with a shitty spirit you're gonna

1114
00:47:39,280 --> 00:47:41,960
Speaker 3: keep a shitty spirit until you talk to somebody about

1115
00:47:41,960 --> 00:47:42,800
Speaker 3: your shitty spirit.

1116
00:47:43,440 --> 00:47:45,840
Speaker 5: So keep the person blocked.

1117
00:47:46,600 --> 00:47:52,040
Speaker 2: Yeah yourself, Yeah yeah, agreed, agreed.

1118
00:47:52,360 --> 00:47:54,800
Speaker 1: And then also maybe like if you're not already in therapy,

1119
00:47:54,960 --> 00:47:56,520
Speaker 1: like check some of that out just so you can

1120
00:47:56,560 --> 00:47:58,960
Speaker 1: release some anger and work through some of the stuff

1121
00:47:58,960 --> 00:48:00,680
Speaker 1: that happened, because that's stuff.

1122
00:48:01,239 --> 00:48:03,040
Speaker 7: Okay, Well let's take a quick break and we'll have

1123
00:48:03,080 --> 00:48:04,000
Speaker 7: a quickie to wrap up.

1124
00:48:04,200 --> 00:48:10,839
Speaker 2: Okay, we'll be right back with Yaminicas Sanders. And we're

1125
00:48:10,840 --> 00:48:15,560
Speaker 2: back with Yaminica Sanders. Do you wanna where was less

1126
00:48:15,600 --> 00:48:19,080
Speaker 2: than you had sex? By the way, I I did,

1127
00:48:19,160 --> 00:48:19,920
Speaker 2: I just did.

1128
00:48:20,520 --> 00:48:25,600
Speaker 3: You sent me a box, Chelsea sent me, not even

1129
00:48:25,680 --> 00:48:27,719
Speaker 3: a box, you know the boxes where you order a

1130
00:48:27,800 --> 00:48:31,239
Speaker 3: Christmas tree right from Amazon and they send you a

1131
00:48:31,320 --> 00:48:31,960
Speaker 3: large box.

1132
00:48:32,040 --> 00:48:33,719
Speaker 5: They can't even break the ship up. It's a lot.

1133
00:48:34,000 --> 00:48:39,200
Speaker 3: She sent me that size box of vibrators, dildos, and

1134
00:48:39,440 --> 00:48:44,040
Speaker 3: machines that can lick your vagina without your assistance. And

1135
00:48:44,440 --> 00:48:47,640
Speaker 3: I and one of them, one was in a baggie,

1136
00:48:48,040 --> 00:48:51,400
Speaker 3: don't even not even like a bag, like I'm talking

1137
00:48:51,480 --> 00:48:54,560
Speaker 3: about a glass like one of them yellow and blue

1138
00:48:54,600 --> 00:48:55,200
Speaker 3: makes green.

1139
00:48:55,440 --> 00:48:58,480
Speaker 5: You know all that shit. She sent me that look

1140
00:48:58,520 --> 00:49:00,120
Speaker 5: and it was greasy.

1141
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:02,600
Speaker 3: Then she sent me the wheel because I wanted to

1142
00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:04,560
Speaker 3: use the one with the licking thing because I've never

1143
00:49:04,640 --> 00:49:07,520
Speaker 3: had it before. She sent me to one that she

1144
00:49:07,520 --> 00:49:09,279
Speaker 3: she didn't even wipe it down.

1145
00:49:09,360 --> 00:49:12,640
Speaker 2: The the wipe it down, the loub was.

1146
00:49:12,719 --> 00:49:17,319
Speaker 5: So stuck on there it melted into the thing. I was.

1147
00:49:17,440 --> 00:49:19,760
Speaker 5: It was you ever seen a mechanic.

1148
00:49:19,400 --> 00:49:21,880
Speaker 3: When he got from underneath the hood of a car

1149
00:49:22,080 --> 00:49:25,600
Speaker 3: and all it like the the transmission fluid dropped down

1150
00:49:25,640 --> 00:49:27,680
Speaker 3: on his face and he had to open it in

1151
00:49:27,880 --> 00:49:31,200
Speaker 3: like a ak. Well, that's it was like that. I

1152
00:49:31,280 --> 00:49:34,200
Speaker 3: could not believe it. What you do to your vagina,

1153
00:49:34,280 --> 00:49:38,040
Speaker 3: Chelsea is insane. But I do currently have three of

1154
00:49:38,080 --> 00:49:41,600
Speaker 3: them in rotation and the one we saw them last night,

1155
00:49:41,840 --> 00:49:43,480
Speaker 3: and I have some out on the front rod. I

1156
00:49:43,520 --> 00:49:44,480
Speaker 3: can't get rid of them.

1157
00:49:44,680 --> 00:49:46,799
Speaker 2: None of the vibrators that I sent you had been

1158
00:49:46,880 --> 00:49:49,680
Speaker 2: used by me. I got lots of swags sent to

1159
00:49:49,760 --> 00:49:57,160
Speaker 2: my house. I told Carlos, who works use their vibran,

1160
00:49:57,280 --> 00:49:59,359
Speaker 2: to get all the vibrators out of the house and

1161
00:49:59,400 --> 00:50:02,640
Speaker 2: to send them to Yaminika, because I know how horny

1162
00:50:02,680 --> 00:50:05,200
Speaker 2: you are. I know how horney I've been listening. I

1163
00:50:05,280 --> 00:50:07,960
Speaker 2: hear you. I see how you interact with men, and

1164
00:50:08,040 --> 00:50:11,600
Speaker 2: you need like a constant penetration of some sort. So

1165
00:50:11,800 --> 00:50:14,680
Speaker 2: as a gesture of friendship, I said, you know who

1166
00:50:14,680 --> 00:50:17,920
Speaker 2: could really put these fucking vibrators to use? The one

1167
00:50:18,040 --> 00:50:20,640
Speaker 2: that was used I can't speak to because I've never

1168
00:50:20,719 --> 00:50:22,319
Speaker 2: used any of those. But I did have a friend

1169
00:50:22,360 --> 00:50:24,600
Speaker 2: who came from Whistler who stayed at my house, and

1170
00:50:24,640 --> 00:50:27,080
Speaker 2: when she saw my I have a table where people

1171
00:50:27,120 --> 00:50:29,320
Speaker 2: send all of their you know, when when a celebrity

1172
00:50:29,360 --> 00:50:31,000
Speaker 2: comes out with a vibrator, they send it to me

1173
00:50:31,400 --> 00:50:35,600
Speaker 2: or you know whoever whatever brand, And my friend came

1174
00:50:35,640 --> 00:50:37,919
Speaker 2: downstairs and she goes, oh my god, you're never gonna

1175
00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:40,000
Speaker 2: believe this vibrator whatever. It was like it was like

1176
00:50:40,000 --> 00:50:42,640
Speaker 2: a double whoopsiedoodle, like one in your asshole and one

1177
00:50:42,640 --> 00:50:45,120
Speaker 2: of your She goes, this is amazing, this is amazing.

1178
00:50:45,520 --> 00:50:47,520
Speaker 2: She goes, you have to try this, and I'm like, well,

1179
00:50:47,560 --> 00:50:49,920
Speaker 2: I'm not hitting me that, I'm not gonna know all. Like,

1180
00:50:50,120 --> 00:50:52,640
Speaker 2: I let me finish. I said, I am not going

1181
00:50:52,719 --> 00:50:56,040
Speaker 2: to use the vibrator that you used. Are you fucking serious?

1182
00:50:56,400 --> 00:50:58,000
Speaker 2: I looked at my friend, I go, are you you

1183
00:50:58,040 --> 00:51:00,480
Speaker 2: think I'm gonna use your By the way, my friend

1184
00:51:00,520 --> 00:51:03,400
Speaker 2: was here going to medical appointments. She was seeing a

1185
00:51:03,440 --> 00:51:06,800
Speaker 2: bevy of doctors to make sure that she wasn't diagnosed

1186
00:51:06,840 --> 00:51:10,040
Speaker 2: with something very bad. And during that time, I go,

1187
00:51:10,160 --> 00:51:13,399
Speaker 2: at what point during this week of medical appointments did

1188
00:51:13,440 --> 00:51:14,520
Speaker 2: you feel horny?

1189
00:51:14,880 --> 00:51:15,000
Speaker 8: Like?

1190
00:51:15,120 --> 00:51:17,680
Speaker 2: That's what I couldn't understand. So, if there was a

1191
00:51:17,840 --> 00:51:21,279
Speaker 2: used one, my conjecture is that that was hers that

1192
00:51:21,320 --> 00:51:23,920
Speaker 2: she left in the spare bedroom that was wrapped up,

1193
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:26,520
Speaker 2: probably by my housekeeper, my bell, if she didn't use it.

1194
00:51:26,520 --> 00:51:29,480
Speaker 2: Also because she's also masturbates at the house sometimes, I've

1195
00:51:29,480 --> 00:51:32,000
Speaker 2: been told. And then she sent that to you. And

1196
00:51:32,040 --> 00:51:33,800
Speaker 2: I'm sorry that you got to use vibrator, but I

1197
00:51:33,840 --> 00:51:36,000
Speaker 2: would encourage you to wash it and use it again.

1198
00:51:36,360 --> 00:51:40,480
Speaker 3: You had said, let me finish, like when you got finished,

1199
00:51:41,200 --> 00:51:45,839
Speaker 3: it was all gonna make sense. It was worse the

1200
00:51:45,840 --> 00:51:49,239
Speaker 3: more I let you finish. You mean to tell me

1201
00:51:49,760 --> 00:51:54,560
Speaker 3: you let me? You sent me through the mail? If

1202
00:51:54,840 --> 00:51:57,759
Speaker 3: can somebody google if this is a hate crime, and

1203
00:51:57,800 --> 00:51:59,480
Speaker 3: I want the Post office to get involved.

1204
00:51:59,520 --> 00:52:00,960
Speaker 5: I want you to not Yeah, let's.

1205
00:52:00,760 --> 00:52:04,800
Speaker 3: Get you did tell me, Chelsea that you sent me

1206
00:52:04,960 --> 00:52:07,800
Speaker 3: the vibrator of a bit who was in your grab,

1207
00:52:08,160 --> 00:52:11,680
Speaker 3: who was having current vaginal appointments when a doctor was

1208
00:52:12,520 --> 00:52:13,480
Speaker 3: going on world vagina.

1209
00:52:13,520 --> 00:52:16,440
Speaker 2: No no, not vaginal, not vaginal. No no, no, no, she

1210
00:52:16,440 --> 00:52:19,080
Speaker 2: didn't wasn't saying about a vagina. She was talking to

1211
00:52:19,120 --> 00:52:21,040
Speaker 2: doctors about a different condition that had nothing to do

1212
00:52:21,080 --> 00:52:22,080
Speaker 2: with her vagina.

1213
00:52:22,040 --> 00:52:25,640
Speaker 5: Any condition. I put that ship in my pussy.

1214
00:52:25,280 --> 00:52:27,360
Speaker 2: Bitch, I know, I know you did, and you're going

1215
00:52:27,440 --> 00:52:30,960
Speaker 2: to do it again. What's the last question, Catherine? Do

1216
00:52:31,080 --> 00:52:33,000
Speaker 2: we see? We do we do?

1217
00:52:33,760 --> 00:52:36,520
Speaker 1: Our last question comes from one of our rare straight

1218
00:52:36,560 --> 00:52:40,759
Speaker 1: mail listeners. Dear Chelsea, I recently got an invitation to

1219
00:52:40,840 --> 00:52:43,480
Speaker 1: my ex girlfriend's wedding. We dated for about a year

1220
00:52:43,560 --> 00:52:46,640
Speaker 1: and then had an amicable breakup. We remained friends after

1221
00:52:46,640 --> 00:52:48,600
Speaker 1: we split up, but I feel it odds with going

1222
00:52:48,640 --> 00:52:51,640
Speaker 1: to the wedding because about six months into her relationship

1223
00:52:51,680 --> 00:52:54,240
Speaker 1: with her now fiance, we hooked up a few times,

1224
00:52:54,239 --> 00:52:55,719
Speaker 1: and I don't know if she ever told him that.

1225
00:52:56,360 --> 00:52:58,319
Speaker 1: They've been together for over three years now and he

1226
00:52:58,400 --> 00:53:00,680
Speaker 1: seems great. So I want to be part of her,

1227
00:53:00,760 --> 00:53:02,759
Speaker 1: but part of me feels guilty about being there.

1228
00:53:02,880 --> 00:53:05,239
Speaker 7: Should I go or just blow it off? Thanks Zach.

1229
00:53:05,840 --> 00:53:09,120
Speaker 2: That sounds like a straight man's question. Serious. Wow, we

1230
00:53:09,160 --> 00:53:11,520
Speaker 2: don't get a lot of straight man calling into this podcast.

1231
00:53:11,920 --> 00:53:14,759
Speaker 2: First of all, I really appreciate that because being sensitive

1232
00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:18,799
Speaker 2: to all of those different kind of nuances of what happened. Yeah,

1233
00:53:18,880 --> 00:53:21,560
Speaker 2: I understand feeling weird about that, and I probably would

1234
00:53:21,560 --> 00:53:22,200
Speaker 2: skip the wedding.

1235
00:53:22,640 --> 00:53:23,359
Speaker 5: Here's my thing.

1236
00:53:23,560 --> 00:53:26,759
Speaker 3: If he's going to maintain a friendship with her, and

1237
00:53:26,880 --> 00:53:29,680
Speaker 3: he already has a friendship with her in him, it

1238
00:53:29,800 --> 00:53:32,560
Speaker 3: is going to look weird that he's not at the wedding,

1239
00:53:32,760 --> 00:53:35,040
Speaker 3: So you know, he has to think about that as well.

1240
00:53:35,560 --> 00:53:37,719
Speaker 3: I think he needs to address like what is his

1241
00:53:37,719 --> 00:53:40,719
Speaker 3: feelings for her? You know, because if you still hooking up?

1242
00:53:40,719 --> 00:53:42,279
Speaker 3: What does she feel about this guy? Why are they

1243
00:53:42,360 --> 00:53:42,880
Speaker 3: hooking up?

1244
00:53:42,920 --> 00:53:43,120
Speaker 5: Wow?

1245
00:53:43,120 --> 00:53:45,279
Speaker 2: Well that was that was before they've now been together

1246
00:53:45,320 --> 00:53:46,759
Speaker 2: for like two and a half years. The first six

1247
00:53:46,800 --> 00:53:49,000
Speaker 2: months she said they were He said that they've been

1248
00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:51,839
Speaker 2: hooking up. But Zak, I would say, yeah, I would

1249
00:53:51,840 --> 00:53:54,000
Speaker 2: skip the wedding because, like, the husband.

1250
00:53:53,719 --> 00:53:57,799
Speaker 3: Don't skip his e Really, I'm telling you.

1251
00:53:57,000 --> 00:53:58,880
Speaker 2: If he you know, and like if he knew that

1252
00:53:58,960 --> 00:53:59,800
Speaker 2: someone was there.

1253
00:53:59,640 --> 00:54:02,960
Speaker 5: That she he's friends with them, That's what I'm saying.

1254
00:54:03,000 --> 00:54:06,160
Speaker 2: But the husband doesn't know about them fooling around, right, probably.

1255
00:54:06,480 --> 00:54:10,120
Speaker 3: But if okay, your ex, your friends were now were

1256
00:54:10,080 --> 00:54:13,440
Speaker 3: all friends, and we get married and all of a sudden,

1257
00:54:13,960 --> 00:54:17,080
Speaker 3: your ex who's our friend, is not at our wedding.

1258
00:54:18,280 --> 00:54:20,680
Speaker 3: Oh y'all must have slept together, then that's the first

1259
00:54:20,680 --> 00:54:23,799
Speaker 3: thing I would think. If my partner's ex, who we're

1260
00:54:23,840 --> 00:54:26,000
Speaker 3: all friends with doesn't show up to our web okay,

1261
00:54:26,000 --> 00:54:30,480
Speaker 3: so go you know, yeah, you just know you have to.

1262
00:54:30,440 --> 00:54:31,360
Speaker 5: Go to the wedding.

1263
00:54:31,600 --> 00:54:35,000
Speaker 3: What you need to do is get over that you

1264
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:37,480
Speaker 3: fucked with her and just move on, because clearly I

1265
00:54:37,480 --> 00:54:39,719
Speaker 3: guess they moving on. They get married and just start

1266
00:54:39,719 --> 00:54:40,400
Speaker 3: a clean slate.

1267
00:54:40,680 --> 00:54:44,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true, that's true. I'm just thinking of the husband.

1268
00:54:44,600 --> 00:54:46,799
Speaker 2: I'm thinking of the husband, like, how would you feel

1269
00:54:46,960 --> 00:54:49,840
Speaker 2: to know that your girlfriend and your wife is someone

1270
00:54:49,880 --> 00:54:52,400
Speaker 2: she was cheating on you with is at the wedding?

1271
00:54:52,440 --> 00:54:53,920
Speaker 5: And I understand that, Chelsea.

1272
00:54:54,000 --> 00:54:56,520
Speaker 3: What I'm saying is, I don't know how if if

1273
00:54:56,560 --> 00:54:59,959
Speaker 3: he's friends with them now, that's because it's all about

1274
00:55:00,080 --> 00:55:01,080
Speaker 3: what the husband's gonna think.

1275
00:55:02,000 --> 00:55:03,680
Speaker 5: Is he ever going to tell him that they did that?

1276
00:55:03,880 --> 00:55:05,319
Speaker 5: He's not going to tell them, So I.

1277
00:55:05,239 --> 00:55:07,239
Speaker 2: Would put you raise a better point. I guess I

1278
00:55:07,280 --> 00:55:10,080
Speaker 2: guess you could sow Zach great. I mean one one

1279
00:55:10,120 --> 00:55:12,120
Speaker 2: piece of advice and then a different piece of advice.

1280
00:55:14,120 --> 00:55:18,400
Speaker 2: Problems problems solved. Problem has been solved.

1281
00:55:19,800 --> 00:55:21,879
Speaker 5: I love you, Chelsea, I really do.

1282
00:55:22,000 --> 00:55:25,759
Speaker 3: I wish I didn't use so many ways you're problematic,

1283
00:55:26,480 --> 00:55:27,680
Speaker 3: but you know I love you.

1284
00:55:27,840 --> 00:55:28,600
Speaker 5: I just really do.

1285
00:55:28,719 --> 00:55:32,120
Speaker 2: I love you too. Okay, that's us for today. Follow

1286
00:55:32,200 --> 00:55:34,799
Speaker 2: Yaminika on Instagram. You guys, please give her love on

1287
00:55:34,840 --> 00:55:36,160
Speaker 2: Instagram so that they stop.

1288
00:55:36,000 --> 00:55:36,960
Speaker 5: Sucking YouTube too.

1289
00:55:37,080 --> 00:55:39,680
Speaker 2: Please just get YouTube and go watch that special. It's

1290
00:55:39,760 --> 00:55:40,840
Speaker 2: really important.

1291
00:55:42,400 --> 00:55:43,640
Speaker 5: And clear your history.

1292
00:55:43,840 --> 00:55:45,879
Speaker 7: Awesome. We'll have fun at the Mammogram you too.

1293
00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:46,600
Speaker 2: Thank you.

1294
00:55:46,760 --> 00:55:50,799
Speaker 5: I'm going to get my boots with that too, was like,

1295
00:55:51,239 --> 00:55:51,719
Speaker 5: thank you.

1296
00:55:52,600 --> 00:55:55,720
Speaker 2: Okay. My remaining dates for Vegas, there are remaining dates

1297
00:55:55,760 --> 00:56:01,400
Speaker 2: for this year. Summertime is coming and I will be

1298
00:56:01,760 --> 00:56:06,760
Speaker 2: in Vegas at the Cosmo doing my residency on August thirtieth,

1299
00:56:07,080 --> 00:56:11,279
Speaker 2: and then November one and twenty ninth. November one and

1300
00:56:11,360 --> 00:56:14,839
Speaker 2: November twenty ninth, I will be in Las Vegas at

1301
00:56:14,880 --> 00:56:18,719
Speaker 2: the Cosmo performing Inside Myself at the Chelsea. It's called

1302
00:56:18,800 --> 00:56:22,040
Speaker 2: Chelsea at the Chelsea for a reason. Okay, thank you.

1303
00:56:23,000 --> 00:56:25,600
Speaker 1: Do you want advice from Chelsea right into Dear Chelsea

1304
00:56:25,600 --> 00:56:29,239
Speaker 1: Podcast at gmail dot com. Find full video episodes of

1305
00:56:29,280 --> 00:56:32,399
Speaker 1: Dear Chelsea on YouTube by searching at Dear Chelsea Pod.

1306
00:56:32,960 --> 00:56:36,840
Speaker 1: Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brad Dickert executive

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Speaker 1: producer Catherine Law And be sure to check out our

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Speaker 1: merch at Chelseahandler dot com