WEBVTT - Window Seat vs. Aisle Seat 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:08.520 M hey, everybody, welcome to hold up. It's a big 0:00:08.560 --> 0:00:12.040 show about not a lot. I'm gonna do one of 0:00:12.080 --> 0:00:14.080 these every episode. I'm just gonna find a way to 0:00:14.160 --> 0:00:18.919 describe it. And I'm your your co host, host co 0:00:19.120 --> 0:00:22.880 host whenever there's two. It does also make it a 0:00:22.880 --> 0:00:25.799 bit of a weird thing. But whenever you do the drops, 0:00:25.920 --> 0:00:29.280 you obviously say that you're the host. So yeah, yeah, 0:00:29.320 --> 0:00:33.000 but then that's just because you're not there. Oh yeah, 0:00:33.040 --> 0:00:38.160 but I'm your host Josh Johnson joined by my co host. Wow, 0:00:38.200 --> 0:00:42.360 the the the downgrade. I I it's it's like a 0:00:42.400 --> 0:00:45.559 pilot copilot situation, right like, because there's some days you're 0:00:45.560 --> 0:00:49.880 gonna be piloting. There's gonna be days where you care 0:00:50.080 --> 0:00:52.760 very much about something that I'm just opposed, but I 0:00:52.800 --> 0:00:56.440 don't care as much. That's a day for you. Okay, okay, okay, 0:00:56.480 --> 0:00:58.600 I hear you, I hear you. What's your name? Tell 0:00:58.640 --> 0:01:04.160 the people? I say Sloan. Um could have been Lazaria Sloan, 0:01:04.280 --> 0:01:07.520 but um. There was a very brave woman who did 0:01:07.560 --> 0:01:10.240 my birth certificate who I really just had to put 0:01:10.240 --> 0:01:13.480 her foot down. Um. I'll tell you that story later. 0:01:13.880 --> 0:01:18.240 But yeah, I'm dul say, Sloan, I'm here. I woke 0:01:18.360 --> 0:01:21.880 up and it is what it is. Baby. Uh. You know, 0:01:22.319 --> 0:01:24.959 the Lord had blessed us to see another day to 0:01:25.040 --> 0:01:27.920 talk about the nonsense that we talked about on this 0:01:28.080 --> 0:01:32.160 here podcast. So we're here. We're here on this audio 0:01:32.240 --> 0:01:35.399 format today not to talk about anything big going on 0:01:35.440 --> 0:01:37.360 the world. We're not talking about climate change, We're not 0:01:37.560 --> 0:01:42.840 not talking about anything serious. We are diametrically opposed. We 0:01:43.360 --> 0:01:48.920 are butting heads. We can't seem to agree on windows 0:01:48.920 --> 0:01:53.080 seat versus iisle seat because you don't want to live 0:01:53.240 --> 0:01:56.480 right I don't want to live right out here, living 0:01:56.480 --> 0:02:00.440 in chaos. Okay, so tell the people what's draw on. 0:02:01.440 --> 0:02:06.520 I am team windows seat, Joshua, where do you land 0:02:06.520 --> 0:02:09.640 on this? I'm team I'll see because we can at 0:02:09.680 --> 0:02:14.800 least both agree that no one in our Christian circle 0:02:15.720 --> 0:02:19.400 would want the middle seat. That that is a life, 0:02:20.240 --> 0:02:23.399 that is that if you love the middle seat, I'll 0:02:23.440 --> 0:02:25.600 go ahead and say it. I don't care who it offends. 0:02:25.880 --> 0:02:30.480 I think you're living foul. Also, I could say it's 0:02:30.480 --> 0:02:32.760 been a good minute since I've been in a situation 0:02:32.800 --> 0:02:39.480 on a plane where there even was a middle seat. Wow. Wow, 0:02:40.280 --> 0:02:44.239 that's that that's one of those things that look that's 0:02:44.240 --> 0:02:47.240 a blessing, look at Jesus. But I would not tell 0:02:47.400 --> 0:02:51.720 everybody that all the time. You know there's haters out here. 0:02:51.800 --> 0:02:55.000 You know that you can't let everyone know how the 0:02:55.080 --> 0:02:58.600 Lord blesses you. What I can tell you but I 0:02:58.680 --> 0:03:04.240 can't tell you, is that first class seats I'm more 0:03:04.280 --> 0:03:07.840 affordable in certain situations than you think they would be. 0:03:08.360 --> 0:03:14.400 But like sometimes like I've gotten like yo, I'm gonna say, 0:03:14.400 --> 0:03:17.640 how the Lord bless me? One time I got a 0:03:17.760 --> 0:03:21.840 lay down seat. I'm talking about flat right, yea Jet 0:03:21.880 --> 0:03:29.440 Blue Delta Delta Okay, New York to San Francisco, round 0:03:29.560 --> 0:03:37.400 trip six dollars. Wow. I don't know how, I don't 0:03:37.440 --> 0:03:41.320 know who, I don't know what glitch happened on delta 0:03:41.400 --> 0:03:45.080 on that good morning. But I needed that seat because 0:03:45.080 --> 0:03:49.040 I got very sick. It's like, remember, got so sick. 0:03:49.080 --> 0:03:51.600 I lost twenty pounds in a month, like well like 0:03:52.120 --> 0:03:53.960 actually in a week, and I was just sick all month. 0:03:54.000 --> 0:03:57.120 And we came back to working and leave again. I 0:03:57.280 --> 0:03:59.200 was so sick. The man next to me put the 0:03:59.240 --> 0:04:03.840 blanket on me, like tucked me in. Then when we landed, 0:04:03.840 --> 0:04:05.840 they didn't make me put my seat up. They just 0:04:05.920 --> 0:04:09.200 let me land flat, And I promise you. I looked 0:04:09.200 --> 0:04:10.640 in the mirror one day and I was like, wait 0:04:10.680 --> 0:04:13.000 a minute, let me just see how much y'all wait, 0:04:13.640 --> 0:04:18.240 And in like seven or ten days, I lost twenty pounds. 0:04:18.880 --> 0:04:20.720 And I called my homegirl and told her I started 0:04:20.760 --> 0:04:23.359 feeling better, and she was like, bitch, come cough in 0:04:23.480 --> 0:04:26.760 my mouth, what are you talking about? Twenty pounds of 0:04:26.760 --> 0:04:28.960 that day, She's like, listen, I had a dude tell 0:04:29.000 --> 0:04:30.800 me to lose the weight. He said, either by sickness 0:04:30.839 --> 0:04:39.960 or by fitness. But we're gonna get this. Look. I'll 0:04:40.000 --> 0:04:43.680 tell you right now that that that thing of not 0:04:43.880 --> 0:04:50.560 even being in the world of middle seats is wild. 0:04:50.960 --> 0:04:54.039 Have you ever been on the Jet Blue flight Mint. 0:04:54.160 --> 0:04:55.480 I'm gonna tell you what. I'm gonna tell you what. 0:04:55.520 --> 0:04:58.279 First class is very affordable Jet Blue Mint. They don't 0:04:58.279 --> 0:05:00.000 have it all the time. They don't do what I'm 0:05:00.040 --> 0:05:03.800 every flight. They don't do it on every flight. But 0:05:05.000 --> 0:05:10.480 bro good food. Good food. Also Delta the disrespect. Delta 0:05:10.560 --> 0:05:14.800 does not offer a lay down seat from New York 0:05:14.800 --> 0:05:20.359 to San Diego, just not at all. Delta is okay. 0:05:20.520 --> 0:05:24.120 So sometimes I'm in Atlanta, and sometimes when I get 0:05:24.160 --> 0:05:27.400 to that airport, I'm like, y'all really must be feeling 0:05:27.440 --> 0:05:32.800 yourselves because because the fact that you close, so do 0:05:32.839 --> 0:05:35.000 you have clear? Of course I have clear. If you're 0:05:35.000 --> 0:05:36.800 a person who travels like what I mean, comics who 0:05:36.880 --> 0:05:39.320 travel a lot, who don't have clearer pre check, and 0:05:39.320 --> 0:05:44.159 I'm like, you don't have eighty dollars. This is my 0:05:44.240 --> 0:05:46.560 thing about pre check. This is my thing about like 0:05:46.720 --> 0:05:50.800 that stuff is wild. This is proof. This is like, 0:05:51.200 --> 0:05:56.480 you know, American American flaws at their finest, because everything 0:05:56.520 --> 0:05:59.800 that we do around pre check is proof we really 0:05:59.800 --> 0:06:02.120 don't need to be doing this stuff at all, because 0:06:02.120 --> 0:06:05.520 you mean that for an extra eighty dollars, I couldn't 0:06:05.640 --> 0:06:11.040 possibly be a terrorist or a driver's license. They take 0:06:11.560 --> 0:06:15.240 all of your fingerprints mm hmm. When I went to 0:06:15.320 --> 0:06:18.120 my pre check interview, they took all my finger prints 0:06:18.600 --> 0:06:22.359 and it asked me like a few questions. I was 0:06:22.440 --> 0:06:25.400 in the car longer than they interviewed me. I will 0:06:25.440 --> 0:06:28.279 tell you right now that when they did I don't 0:06:28.279 --> 0:06:30.160 care if you're clear pre check anything. When they take 0:06:30.200 --> 0:06:32.680 all your fingerprints, where they do all this background check whatever, 0:06:33.279 --> 0:06:38.320 that doesn't mean I'm not gonna be crazy like that's yeah, 0:06:38.360 --> 0:06:40.520 That's that's my thing with this whole thing where I'm like, 0:06:40.760 --> 0:06:43.120 you did all this background stuff. Yeah, that just means 0:06:43.120 --> 0:06:46.960 a person hasn't done anything yet. But but also when 0:06:47.000 --> 0:06:50.080 you look at this is the sact. I think they 0:06:50.200 --> 0:06:53.560 probably look into certain people more then they look at 0:06:53.600 --> 0:06:56.520 the other people. Like if I come walking in to 0:06:56.640 --> 0:06:59.680 get my pre check there, like she ain't gonna do nothing. 0:07:00.400 --> 0:07:03.320 I'm not gonna they know, like when in a history 0:07:03.360 --> 0:07:08.920 of life have you seen any black woman do any 0:07:09.000 --> 0:07:11.480 fucking thing. When I walked in, they were like, bro, 0:07:11.640 --> 0:07:14.720 just just take her. I was. I was literally like 0:07:14.760 --> 0:07:17.080 I was done. I just would that's it. I mean, 0:07:17.120 --> 0:07:20.320 I've only seen black women blow shut up as a 0:07:20.360 --> 0:07:26.440 matter of speech. It's always in theory, right, it's always 0:07:26.520 --> 0:07:31.400 like I'm hurting everybody's I'm gonna light this bitch up, 0:07:31.480 --> 0:07:34.960 as in I'm taking back back back, I'm taking shots 0:07:34.960 --> 0:07:39.440 at everybody in the room verbally. But it's like we're 0:07:39.480 --> 0:07:46.480 not doing terrorism. The just just so that we at 0:07:46.520 --> 0:07:50.240 any point in the podcast actually cover the topic. I 0:07:50.400 --> 0:07:53.680 want to hear. I want to hear your thoughts and 0:07:53.800 --> 0:07:58.040 feelings on the window seat and why you think it's superior. Okay, 0:07:58.200 --> 0:07:59.880 I will start with this because I know this is 0:08:00.000 --> 0:08:02.520 going to be your point, right, so I'm gonna give 0:08:02.560 --> 0:08:09.000 you this. Oh okay, wow for you even say I 0:08:09.040 --> 0:08:11.920 already know your fault. Okay, go ahead, go ahead. I 0:08:11.960 --> 0:08:15.560 know you're going to say now the only cause you know, 0:08:15.640 --> 0:08:17.760 usually I start with it's kind of like, give me 0:08:17.800 --> 0:08:21.880 the bad news first. The only hiccup to a window 0:08:21.960 --> 0:08:26.240 seat is that you have to ask an adult to 0:08:26.400 --> 0:08:29.679 let you pee. That is, but I can't tell you. 0:08:29.960 --> 0:08:33.520 There are a few airlines. First of all, you're in 0:08:33.559 --> 0:08:37.400 Alaska Airlines flight and you're sitting in the very first row. Yeah, 0:08:37.559 --> 0:08:40.439 there's enough seat, There's enough space for you to get 0:08:40.480 --> 0:08:46.520 around the other person. If you're on uh Hawaiian air 0:08:47.600 --> 0:08:49.800 the way they're laid down seats are set up is 0:08:49.840 --> 0:08:54.480 there is more than adequate space to get up and 0:08:54.480 --> 0:08:57.480 go to the restroom without even waking the other person 0:08:57.559 --> 0:09:01.079 up or making them even have to set up Delta. 0:09:01.160 --> 0:09:04.640 On the other hand, put you in fucking like isolation 0:09:04.679 --> 0:09:09.079 tube cubbies. So that's why if you ever I was 0:09:09.160 --> 0:09:11.840 asking you, if you've ever been on those mint flights, 0:09:12.040 --> 0:09:13.960 the one where you're in the where it's just you 0:09:14.000 --> 0:09:17.640 in the road, just you fire. Yes, there's that, and 0:09:17.679 --> 0:09:19.559 I think Delta might do it, because you know the 0:09:19.640 --> 0:09:22.480 some of some flights there's like first class and then 0:09:22.480 --> 0:09:26.760 there's business class, m if something. Usually it's for a job, 0:09:26.760 --> 0:09:29.160 because I'm not paying that money to be in the sky. Like, 0:09:29.360 --> 0:09:33.079 I have my limits. I have my limits, and sometimes 0:09:33.080 --> 0:09:36.200 you're just like how many facts, bitch, Like there's sometimes 0:09:36.200 --> 0:09:39.719 there's just too much money, right, But that's the only 0:09:39.720 --> 0:09:41.480 downfall of the window seat where you have to be 0:09:41.520 --> 0:09:44.199 like you either have to coordinate it or like you 0:09:44.240 --> 0:09:46.720 either have to ask the other person. Because that's why 0:09:46.760 --> 0:09:52.400 I got to a point where I we'll just fucking hibernate. 0:09:53.200 --> 0:09:55.720 I get on the plane, I eat my food, and 0:09:55.880 --> 0:09:59.160 I am jon Zo and so I don't have to 0:09:59.200 --> 0:10:02.240 pee into like it off the plane. Yeah, it's only 0:10:02.320 --> 0:10:05.440 recently where I'm being like, you know what, maybe I 0:10:05.480 --> 0:10:10.040 should be because because I can say something just being 0:10:10.040 --> 0:10:12.640 about a plane room, just like I'm gonna find I'm out, 0:10:12.720 --> 0:10:15.800 I'm done. So I'm sucking hibernating. It's because I don't 0:10:15.800 --> 0:10:18.800 want to wake up the other person. Also, if you 0:10:18.840 --> 0:10:20.920 were the asshole that gets upset when the person in 0:10:20.960 --> 0:10:25.040 the window seats, actually, fuck you. You cannot be upset 0:10:25.880 --> 0:10:29.640 when the person in the window seat is like, hey, 0:10:29.679 --> 0:10:31.640 I need to go to the bathroom because I had 0:10:31.640 --> 0:10:34.280 a guy go or you're getting up. I was like, 0:10:34.400 --> 0:10:37.520 bro oh, I know the wildest thing that ever happened. 0:10:37.520 --> 0:10:39.679 I was gonna plane. I'm in the window seat. There 0:10:39.760 --> 0:10:45.120 is this man in the middle who is translucent right 0:10:46.480 --> 0:10:49.880 what he's very old, white man. I don't know if 0:10:49.920 --> 0:10:52.400 he got any work done or whatever, but he looked 0:10:52.400 --> 0:10:55.360 like a fucking like one of those fish that lives 0:10:55.360 --> 0:10:57.200 in the parts of the ocean where that there's no light. 0:10:57.840 --> 0:11:01.480 So he had this crazy like clear you can see 0:11:01.520 --> 0:11:03.440 like all the veins in it. Says it was nuts. 0:11:03.559 --> 0:11:06.280 And then he had like this tu pay that looked 0:11:06.280 --> 0:11:08.319 like it was just like kind of melted. And then 0:11:08.320 --> 0:11:10.320 there was a person that he was with, this other 0:11:10.360 --> 0:11:12.960 guy that was with him. I don't know if he 0:11:13.040 --> 0:11:17.440 was his whoever, a friend or whatever, chaperone handler, I 0:11:17.440 --> 0:11:20.400 don't know. And so he's sitting in the row in 0:11:20.400 --> 0:11:21.800 front of us in the window. So I'm at the 0:11:21.840 --> 0:11:26.320 window see through white man in the middle, Asian guy 0:11:26.360 --> 0:11:29.520 on the end right. So we're sitting there and he's 0:11:29.559 --> 0:11:37.520 just like doing too much right, He's keep he keeps 0:11:37.520 --> 0:11:39.440 hopping up, started talking to the person his friend in 0:11:39.440 --> 0:11:42.040 the row in front of us, and he's like bumping 0:11:42.080 --> 0:11:44.800 in us as he's doing it. I'm like okay. And 0:11:44.840 --> 0:11:46.800 then they come by and give you like the little 0:11:46.800 --> 0:11:50.360 snack box or whatever. And then when he's done with 0:11:50.480 --> 0:11:58.479 his food, he puts his trash on the Asian dude's tray. 0:11:58.520 --> 0:12:00.800 So he's like, I'm done and then he just moves 0:12:00.840 --> 0:12:02.160 his stuff and me and I at you do look 0:12:02.200 --> 0:12:05.679 at each other like you know, what the fuck? Yeah? 0:12:05.720 --> 0:12:08.240 So I had the window open the take off, and 0:12:08.280 --> 0:12:09.760 then when we're gonna ready the land, I left the 0:12:09.760 --> 0:12:13.040 window closed and he went to reach across me. He's like, 0:12:13.080 --> 0:12:16.400 can you open the window. I was like no, and 0:12:16.440 --> 0:12:19.000 then he went to reach across me and I was like, dude, 0:12:19.120 --> 0:12:23.320 you better not reach across me to open this window. 0:12:24.120 --> 0:12:25.440 And he's like, I want to see that as then 0:12:25.480 --> 0:12:28.320 you should have gotten a window seat. You won't be 0:12:28.320 --> 0:12:34.439 watching it today. He went to reach across me. I went, sir, 0:12:36.520 --> 0:12:40.480 he was read ridiculous. Also, I've never seen this on 0:12:40.520 --> 0:12:42.839 the second time in my life. Paid where the hair 0:12:42.920 --> 0:12:46.679 looked melted. It was a part two paid part hair plugs. 0:12:46.720 --> 0:12:48.200 There was a lot going on with this man. And 0:12:48.240 --> 0:12:51.160 so this person was a middle seat, right, yes, acting 0:12:51.280 --> 0:12:55.920 fucking wild. So like, yeah, we've already established that the 0:12:55.960 --> 0:12:59.280 middle seat comes with a different energy, right he knew, 0:12:59.480 --> 0:13:02.000 But all it's like your friend was in the window, 0:13:02.040 --> 0:13:04.080 your friend and twist seats with you. You You knew that 0:13:04.120 --> 0:13:06.360 you were acting wild. So like, that's the other thing 0:13:06.400 --> 0:13:08.320 about being in the window. If you're in a window 0:13:08.400 --> 0:13:10.360 seat on a three row, in a three seater row, 0:13:12.080 --> 0:13:15.360 you have to acknowledge you might not asking two people 0:13:15.360 --> 0:13:18.200 to get up to pee. That's hard. So the secret 0:13:18.440 --> 0:13:21.559 is you wait till the person in the middle gets 0:13:21.600 --> 0:13:24.760 up to pee or the person on the aisle gets 0:13:24.840 --> 0:13:26.640 up to pe. Because that's what I do when I'm 0:13:26.679 --> 0:13:28.840 on planes now. It's when the person on the aisle 0:13:28.880 --> 0:13:31.400 gets up to p then I'm like, okay, I'll get 0:13:31.480 --> 0:13:34.200 up there because I'm not interrupting you. Because you got up, 0:13:34.559 --> 0:13:36.680 I get you. So this this is my thing. When 0:13:36.679 --> 0:13:42.360 when I choose an aisle seat, I'm I'm thinking ahead. 0:13:42.760 --> 0:13:47.360 I'm planning, all right, I'm putting, I'm putting something together. 0:13:48.120 --> 0:13:51.480 I'm planning the entire experience because yeah, I'm gonna have 0:13:51.520 --> 0:13:55.360 to get up sometimes when people need to pee. I 0:13:55.440 --> 0:13:59.360 understand that. But also I got first access to the snacks. 0:13:59.640 --> 0:14:02.920 I got first access to the safety. Y'all, window seats 0:14:02.920 --> 0:14:06.000 are dead if things go a ride on this flight. 0:14:06.400 --> 0:14:10.280 But but you have first access. I hear you. But 0:14:10.440 --> 0:14:15.920 I've sat in that cart running into me over and over. 0:14:16.280 --> 0:14:21.600 It is that cart bumping into me. People. But I 0:14:21.600 --> 0:14:25.640 don't like people bumping into me. It is the bank 0:14:25.720 --> 0:14:28.240 of my existence. Like people bumping into me. When you 0:14:28.240 --> 0:14:30.560 are in the aisle c there's a lot of people 0:14:30.800 --> 0:14:36.160 in your personal space. Okay, someone's reaching over you to 0:14:36.200 --> 0:14:39.720 give one or two other people's necks, one or two 0:14:39.760 --> 0:14:42.960 other people a tray of food when they're asking somebody 0:14:42.960 --> 0:14:46.200 what they want to drink. There now they're leaning over you. Right, 0:14:46.920 --> 0:14:49.720 we'll talk to one or two other people. You and 0:14:49.760 --> 0:14:53.160 the flight attendant might as well be making out for 0:14:53.240 --> 0:14:56.360 the amount of times this person is about to be 0:14:56.640 --> 0:15:01.000 in your personal space in a tube in the fucking sky. 0:15:01.160 --> 0:15:03.840 It's too much. That's why I don't do i'le because 0:15:03.840 --> 0:15:06.960 it's an invasion of my personal space. On a regular basis, 0:15:07.160 --> 0:15:09.320 Somebody going to the back, like the number of times 0:15:09.360 --> 0:15:12.240 I've been good in sleep and somebody just the number 0:15:12.320 --> 0:15:15.040 I bumped into. Plenty of people in an aisle c 0:15:15.640 --> 0:15:17.600 just coming back and forth from their arm is on 0:15:17.600 --> 0:15:20.400 the arm rest at right. You are trying to avoid 0:15:20.440 --> 0:15:22.600 one arm. Boom, you hit another arm. It's like a 0:15:22.680 --> 0:15:27.000 fucking it's I'm pinballing my hips down the fucking aisle. 0:15:27.400 --> 0:15:29.400 And if your arm is out or your legs too 0:15:29.480 --> 0:15:37.440 far out, it's like, I'm you're getting touched. Let's go 0:15:37.480 --> 0:15:40.440 over a couple of etiquette things, just in general, so 0:15:40.480 --> 0:15:42.920 we can make sure we're on the same page as 0:15:42.960 --> 0:15:46.560 we decide if window or aisle is better. Okay, now, 0:15:46.720 --> 0:15:49.720 whenn't you and this is a different time in your life, 0:15:49.720 --> 0:15:53.000 I understand, but I'm asking you to go there when 0:15:53.120 --> 0:15:56.080 you in the past had to be in a middle seat, 0:15:56.960 --> 0:16:00.000 so it wasn't often because the thing is, they'll see 0:16:00.760 --> 0:16:03.920 middle seats only happen if you don't plan a hit. 0:16:04.960 --> 0:16:07.480 I know I don't. I was asking you to go 0:16:07.520 --> 0:16:10.000 to that place. I'm not saying you're gonna go back. 0:16:10.080 --> 0:16:12.200 I feel like as soon as I brought it off, 0:16:12.200 --> 0:16:14.320 you were like, don't put that evil on babe. Don't 0:16:14.320 --> 0:16:17.480 you put that evil on me? Ricket Bobby, And so 0:16:17.680 --> 0:16:20.800 all I'm saying is, do you subscribe whether you're in 0:16:20.840 --> 0:16:25.200 the window or aisle, that the arm rests goes to 0:16:25.760 --> 0:16:28.160 the middle seat. I think the armrests goes to the 0:16:28.160 --> 0:16:36.120 middle seat because the aisle has an armrest, the window 0:16:36.640 --> 0:16:39.120 has the whole side of the plane. They have the 0:16:39.120 --> 0:16:42.480 majesty of flight, the majesty in flights. They've got a 0:16:42.480 --> 0:16:44.520 window to look out of. You see what I'm saying. 0:16:45.040 --> 0:16:50.400 So I think the arm rests should go to the 0:16:51.080 --> 0:16:55.920 middle seat. I have been in the elbow competition with 0:16:56.000 --> 0:16:59.320 someone when I was in the middle seat, and I 0:16:59.320 --> 0:17:02.760 thought the respectful. I also have been on planes where 0:17:04.560 --> 0:17:07.240 because you know, when you start doing colleges, the planes 0:17:07.280 --> 0:17:11.760 get staller, smaller, like like Russian stacking dolls. So I've 0:17:11.760 --> 0:17:13.680 been on the plane. I can I can tell you 0:17:14.640 --> 0:17:16.240 I was gonna plane one time and there was this 0:17:16.560 --> 0:17:22.600 very like just muscularned man. This is huge man. He 0:17:22.760 --> 0:17:26.880 sat down after I sat down, and I just spent 0:17:26.960 --> 0:17:30.080 the whole flight just behind his shoulder, like that's where 0:17:30.119 --> 0:17:33.800 I wanted to just this is where I live now. Yeah, 0:17:34.080 --> 0:17:38.080 me and this man go together because there was nowhere. 0:17:38.400 --> 0:17:41.240 There was nowhere question. We're a couple. For the next 0:17:41.320 --> 0:17:45.359 two hours, me and this man go together and he 0:17:45.359 --> 0:17:46.920 would ask me, and I was very much like that, 0:17:47.000 --> 0:17:49.200 you know, I was like, no, I'm good, I'm okay. 0:17:49.400 --> 0:17:52.359 They're like, you can't do anything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But 0:17:52.560 --> 0:17:55.560 when it came to that armrest, when it came that armrest, 0:17:56.760 --> 0:17:59.159 I lit homeboy have it. And I let homeboy have 0:17:59.240 --> 0:18:02.720 it because I had whole fucking shoulder. That's why I 0:18:02.800 --> 0:18:05.320 let him have it. If you are just out here, 0:18:05.359 --> 0:18:09.560 just your body, just on people. Yeah, we go together 0:18:09.880 --> 0:18:12.639 like truly until this blain lands. I am your wife. 0:18:13.040 --> 0:18:15.960 You didn't you didn't say it this way. But I 0:18:16.000 --> 0:18:18.359 can tell that this man was good looking because just 0:18:18.440 --> 0:18:23.120 the way that because you were like, no, anytime, anytime 0:18:23.160 --> 0:18:26.159 you get that quiet, I know, I know you're like 0:18:26.240 --> 0:18:30.040 feeling somebody anytime. No, no, it's all right, it's like no, no, no, 0:18:31.680 --> 0:18:34.240 you know, it's like quiet, a little bit of shake 0:18:34.320 --> 0:18:42.159 to it too. I got sucking cap and Jane Katherine 0:18:42.200 --> 0:18:44.760 hepburn but no, but I I've been on flights where 0:18:45.359 --> 0:18:48.359 also this man got so mad at me. I was 0:18:48.400 --> 0:18:51.119 the windows. See, he was in the aisle this is 0:18:51.240 --> 0:18:53.080 I was. I was on the United flight and I 0:18:53.160 --> 0:18:55.640 was just like, oh, the middle class is dying because 0:18:57.760 --> 0:19:00.080 first class was full. Because there was three sexuals on 0:19:00.160 --> 0:19:04.760 this plane. Right, it was first class, I guess there 0:19:04.840 --> 0:19:08.320 was a middle business class area. And then there was economy, right, 0:19:10.320 --> 0:19:15.800 first class fucking jam packed. Economy full of ship. There 0:19:15.880 --> 0:19:22.800 were forty seats in the middle that had five six 0:19:22.920 --> 0:19:26.359 people in them, and I was like, what the fund 0:19:26.480 --> 0:19:29.040 is happening on this plate. They couldn't push any of 0:19:29.080 --> 0:19:32.280 the people from economy uppere because when you look back 0:19:32.320 --> 0:19:34.800 at Economy, I swear there were sirens. It was a 0:19:34.840 --> 0:19:38.119 fucking greyhound bus back there. Somebody had a bird like 0:19:38.240 --> 0:19:40.639 it was like a while back there, and there was 0:19:40.760 --> 0:19:42.480 curtains and I was like, I've never seen a curtain 0:19:42.520 --> 0:19:45.119 on this part. But this man sits down next to me. 0:19:45.800 --> 0:19:47.920 He you didn't have a little brother, so you don't 0:19:47.920 --> 0:19:50.720 what a little brother like. You know how teenage boys 0:19:50.800 --> 0:19:54.240 smell where it's just that like funk, you are a 0:19:54.240 --> 0:19:57.000 teenage boys, you probably don't smell it. There's a slight funk. 0:19:57.800 --> 0:20:02.680 There's a very specific funk to a teenage boy that 0:20:02.800 --> 0:20:05.639 unless you had like a brother, you don't know what 0:20:05.760 --> 0:20:09.560 it is in A forty year old man sat next 0:20:09.600 --> 0:20:12.760 to me, smelling like a thirteen year old boy who 0:20:12.840 --> 0:20:17.280 just out of the pe class and he was doing, Man, 0:20:17.400 --> 0:20:20.680 you the plane and not left anywhere. Also, he came 0:20:20.720 --> 0:20:22.480 and sat down next to me, which I get it, 0:20:22.560 --> 0:20:25.800 because there's a whole section fucking you don't know where 0:20:25.840 --> 0:20:28.240 these people are. Right when we're getting at the boarding groups. 0:20:28.280 --> 0:20:29.640 You don't know these people don't fill up the plane. 0:20:30.800 --> 0:20:35.040 He sits down immediately, man spreads arms out, So now 0:20:35.119 --> 0:20:39.439 we're going for the fucking jockey. And because he's had 0:20:40.000 --> 0:20:44.400 completely fucking obnoxious right bumping it, knocking my arm off 0:20:44.480 --> 0:20:50.320 the armrest, I was like, oh, this is what we're doing, bitch, 0:20:50.560 --> 0:20:56.080 let me explain something to you. I started doing the 0:20:56.240 --> 0:20:59.560 exact same thing. I'm spreading my arms out, getting my 0:20:59.640 --> 0:21:01.879 chest white. Sorry, I have titnies. I need space right, 0:21:02.240 --> 0:21:05.760 getting my chest wide. Our man spreading, pushing him his 0:21:05.840 --> 0:21:07.760 arm off the armrest. But you want to go, let's 0:21:07.800 --> 0:21:13.200 go right. The plane has not taken off yet. He 0:21:13.440 --> 0:21:17.639 goes and complains to the flight attendant, and then she 0:21:17.800 --> 0:21:19.639 looked at me and then looked at him, and I 0:21:19.720 --> 0:21:24.120 just saw her go get another seat, just said somewhere else, 0:21:25.320 --> 0:21:27.119 and then afterwards she was like, what the hell. I 0:21:27.160 --> 0:21:30.600 was like, I don't know. It was the wildest thing 0:21:30.680 --> 0:21:32.879 to me I've had. Dude, the middle seats go to 0:21:33.000 --> 0:21:36.720 man spread, but he's there's me on one side and 0:21:36.760 --> 0:21:40.320 then another man on the other side. So now they're 0:21:40.359 --> 0:21:42.320 just trying to man spread on the right. I'm like, 0:21:42.440 --> 0:21:44.879 you can't just man spread on the right. That's not 0:21:45.000 --> 0:21:48.440 how this works. You spread and you spreading now, so 0:21:48.560 --> 0:21:52.360 you go to spread, I'm spreading like we all bitch 0:21:52.400 --> 0:21:55.760 with creamy cheese out here. Everybody gets spread. Were peanut 0:21:55.800 --> 0:21:59.679 butter at but fucking country crop. I don't care everybody 0:21:59.720 --> 0:22:02.760 getting spread. Right, So they're that thing. You're in the 0:22:02.880 --> 0:22:06.240 middle seat, keep your fucking we're giving you the arm rest, 0:22:06.440 --> 0:22:10.720 but act right. Also, we're already this is already the 0:22:10.800 --> 0:22:13.000 least amount of space that a human being can be in. 0:22:14.240 --> 0:22:18.800 They have calculated it. Okay, they've made sure what's the 0:22:18.880 --> 0:22:20.800 most reasonable amount of space to put a human being 0:22:20.840 --> 0:22:26.480 in and then not started fucking riot. Yeah yeah, because yeah, 0:22:26.560 --> 0:22:29.320 exactly exactly, what's the smallest amount of space we can 0:22:29.359 --> 0:22:31.440 put these people in before they kill each other? I 0:22:31.520 --> 0:22:34.639 guess my thing is I've been in the middle seat before, 0:22:34.800 --> 0:22:46.320 and this is actually think wow, how dare you? But 0:22:46.520 --> 0:22:57.200 you have though? How in the absolute of daredevil this 0:22:57.440 --> 0:23:00.400 do you? How they dare you? That? What you're trying 0:23:00.400 --> 0:23:04.760 to say, I already asked it to I asked it. 0:23:04.880 --> 0:23:08.800 Don't even re ask me what I was asking you. 0:23:09.320 --> 0:23:14.800 I'm saying, yeah, I have had a middle thief lifestyle before. Okay, 0:23:15.200 --> 0:23:17.560 and I do this thing. I actually think it's courteous. 0:23:17.640 --> 0:23:19.399 I don't know if people like it or not. I 0:23:19.520 --> 0:23:22.840 only had to go arrive maybe twice. I'm a pretty 0:23:22.920 --> 0:23:25.880 nimble dude, and sometimes the person in the aisle seat 0:23:26.080 --> 0:23:29.239 is pretty little, right, So rather than wake them up, 0:23:29.560 --> 0:23:33.160 sometimes I'll just stand up in my seat, I'll put 0:23:33.200 --> 0:23:36.320 a foot on my seat and I'll step over them. 0:23:36.560 --> 0:23:38.840 I'll just like step right. I don't even wake them up. 0:23:38.960 --> 0:23:40.879 I just step over them into the aisle and I 0:23:40.960 --> 0:23:43.880 go about my way, use the bathroom, come back, step 0:23:43.960 --> 0:23:46.680 over them again, and then sit down and they don't 0:23:46.720 --> 0:23:49.280 even wake up. So you either put your ass or 0:23:49.359 --> 0:23:52.320 your crotch in a slip in a person's first They've 0:23:52.400 --> 0:23:56.960 only woken up twice now, both times where the person 0:23:57.160 --> 0:24:01.520 was waking up your crotch in a face, and they 0:24:01.800 --> 0:24:05.359 they did, They did have quite a reaction. But as soon, 0:24:06.760 --> 0:24:08.720 wait a minute, you let me tell all these wild 0:24:08.760 --> 0:24:11.240