Speaker 1: This is Dan Patrick takes a gam.
Speaker 2: Gambling was something that I did a clever way to
Speaker 2: circumvent Dan actually making bets himself by using a proxy,
Speaker 2: and I became consumed by it and now joined by
Speaker 2: Bad Larry and Dylan the graphics guy.
Speaker 1: Here's Dan Patrick.
Speaker 2: Oh did he live up to the billing? Bad Larry
Speaker 2: showed up yesterday at the man Cave and you know
Speaker 2: the reviews are in. Larry, I think everybody universally thought
Speaker 2: you were an ass. And I when I left you
Speaker 2: guys at the man Cave, and I forewarned you know,
Speaker 2: Ray and Dylan and some of the weeks, all the
Speaker 2: backroom guys. I said, hey, he's going to beat you
Speaker 2: every game, just so you know. And then about three
Speaker 2: or four hours later, I meet them at a bar,
Speaker 2: the pit Stop, and I walk in. I walk in,
Speaker 2: and I don't see anybody. I just hear them yelling
Speaker 2: at each other. So they're over at the pool table.
Speaker 2: They're just yelling at each other, and I go, uh, here,
Speaker 2: bad Larry. I walk over and he goes, yeah, I
Speaker 2: haven't lost. I haven't lost a game yet, and yeah,
Speaker 2: you pretty much pissed everybody off, Larry. Congratulations that was
Speaker 2: the intent, Dan.
Speaker 3: I think the the argument you walked in on, Dan
Speaker 3: was Larry saying that he could beat Michael Jordan in
Speaker 3: a free throw shooting about right.
Speaker 4: It wasn't free throw. I've said it a million times
Speaker 4: in my life. I'm going to stand by it, not anymore.
Speaker 4: But fifteen foot jump shots till one thousand dollars shot
Speaker 4: till he quits.
Speaker 3: Yeah right, oh my, that is really one of the
Speaker 3: dumbest things I've ever heard.
Speaker 4: I don't care. I don't I don't care what you
Speaker 4: guys say.
Speaker 2: Larry, are you talking about right now? Right now?
Speaker 4: No? No, not no, not right now?
Speaker 2: Well when remember when you said you could throw a
Speaker 2: golf ball one hundred yards? When when when were you
Speaker 2: able to do that? Like, you have to put in
Speaker 2: context these bets or these ran them things that you said, fish.
Speaker 4: Tails saying thirty thirty years ago.
Speaker 2: Thirty years ago you are going to take and you
Speaker 2: know they're fifteen footers. Those are called free throws.
Speaker 4: Okay, make them eighteen footed. I don't care what you do.
Speaker 1: Look at his.
Speaker 4: Line every game, Dan, he's he's four for twenty one
Speaker 4: or six for twenty one, thirteen for fourteen from a
Speaker 4: foul on.
Speaker 2: Okay, that's fifteen feet away.
Speaker 3: It's also during a game, right, Yeah, here's other factors, Larry.
Speaker 4: You like re breakaway dunks, So instead of being seven
Speaker 4: for twenty one, he was take those three away and
Speaker 4: he was three for eighteen or four for eighteen. He
Speaker 4: wasn't a great shooter. He was a great scorer. We agree.
Speaker 4: We agree on that.
Speaker 2: What what he wasn't a great shooter. His percentage when
Speaker 2: he retired is what forty seven percent from the floor? Yeah,
Speaker 2: it sounds all right, Yeah that that would be pretty good, Larry.
Speaker 2: I think let me get ready to pull up the
Speaker 2: numbers on Michael Jumon.
Speaker 4: Well, you know, like Bird and hey he's us field
Speaker 4: goal percentage are pretty comparable. Bird is a way better shooter.
Speaker 1: Would you beat Bird?
Speaker 4: Michael don't? Yeah, Michael had.
Speaker 2: Larry better. Yeah, Larry, Larry, are you a better shooter
Speaker 2: than me?
Speaker 1: Yes? Whoa long?
Speaker 3: You said you were better than Michael Jordan and Larry
Speaker 3: Bird before you said that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I figured he would say it, but he's Larry.
Speaker 4: I didn't say Larry Bird. Don't change the Dylan. I
Speaker 4: just think Michael Jordan is an overrated shooter. He was
Speaker 4: a great scorer. He wasn't a good shooter. And you
Speaker 4: know what, when he missed a shot, he walked to
Speaker 4: the foul one with a ball whether there.
Speaker 2: We go, there we go? I mean Jordan. Did Jordan
Speaker 2: shoot forty seven percent or better?
Speaker 1: Better than that? Forty nine?
Speaker 2: All those breakaways say that all the time, that he
Speaker 2: was double teamed and knocked down? Yeah, your nuts, Larry, Yeah.
Speaker 4: And then when he missed the shot, they it was
Speaker 4: a foul and then a shot.
Speaker 2: Anymore, Larry, he shot eighty three percent from the free
Speaker 2: throw line.
Speaker 4: Too, so he can make some foul shots. I'll give
Speaker 4: him a fast.
Speaker 2: Eighty three percent. I'll give him his foul. Larry, You're
Speaker 2: not a better shooter than me. You know that. You
Speaker 2: know that.
Speaker 4: Not anymore? Dan, you have a gym in your office.
Speaker 2: What does that have to do with anything?
Speaker 4: Thirty damn thirty years ago, I'll give you that same
Speaker 4: bet too.
Speaker 2: Oh my god. But see, it's all stuff that can't
Speaker 2: be proven. So it's all bullshit.
Speaker 1: You can say whatever you want, Yeah you can.
Speaker 2: You could say whatever you want thirty years ago. I
Speaker 2: could have whatever. It doesn't mean Michael Jordan is shooting
Speaker 2: on something you could do now, Larry, I can throw
Speaker 2: it a hundred yards.
Speaker 4: I'll never lose a game in caps to anyone.
Speaker 3: Who loss like I could beat you and throw the
Speaker 3: stick that he plays at home all the time, and
Speaker 3: I'm like.
Speaker 2: I haven't beat you and kissed the can.
Speaker 3: Also, Ray and I, Ray and I, uh disproved the
Speaker 3: golf ball theory at the golf course the other day.
Speaker 3: We're just trying to throw the golf ball. We also
Speaker 3: got an argument if you could throw a baseball or
Speaker 3: a golf ball further? We all said golf. Well, actually,
Speaker 3: Ray was the only one said baseball. You can for
Speaker 3: sure throw a baseball further. N Yeah, I did too.
Speaker 1: It's wrong.
Speaker 4: Okay, you guys are out of your mind here.
Speaker 2: Yeah, thirty years ago, I could throw it under yards.
Speaker 4: Why do you Why do you think you could throw
Speaker 4: a baseball further? It's heavier. Can you throw a basketball further?
Speaker 2: Or little physics?
Speaker 1: But you can. You can also grip a baseball you
Speaker 1: can't like better?
Speaker 2: Yeah? With your tiny hands.
Speaker 3: Yeah, actually, Larry, I was my biggest takeaway from you
Speaker 3: coming was you were a little shorter than I thought
Speaker 3: you'd Yeah, and the beer gut was actually a little
Speaker 3: bigger than I thought it was.
Speaker 2: And your hands were way smaller than I thought you
Speaker 2: and you had a club.
Speaker 4: I doubt that.
Speaker 2: Really, small hands layer. And you know what they say
Speaker 2: about guys with small hands unhappily married. No, no, no, no, small gloves,
Speaker 2: the small.
Speaker 3: Gloves, and they can beat Jordan in a shooting cont absolutely, okay,
Speaker 3: let me, let me recap, let me recap, Dylan, You're
Speaker 3: lost a half a.
Speaker 2: Unit last week.
Speaker 1: No, I won half unit.
Speaker 2: Oh you won a half unit. Okay, so your minus
Speaker 2: ten and a half big difference. Shaye went neutral last
Speaker 2: weeking bone contention, Danny, if you got a minute on
Speaker 2: the l base ball, I went too and two, but
Speaker 2: I won plus one fifteen twice lost plus one seventy
Speaker 2: and laying the minus one twenty lost that. So okay.
Speaker 2: So as far as the odds go, I'm plus what
Speaker 2: it like, Okay, I'm betting a unit on the dogs,
Speaker 2: on the dogs, on the dogs, I'm betting a unit
Speaker 2: to win whatever the plus number is.
Speaker 1: Like if the one won one point exactly on.
Speaker 2: The favorites, I'm laying it to win one unit. So
Speaker 2: this this is baseball betting, Danny. It's like explaining the sunrise.
Speaker 2: But explain it to Ray, right, and really dumb yourself
Speaker 2: down to be able to explain it. Fair, fair picture day. Ray. Okay,
Speaker 2: listen to what I just fucking said. Compute it. I
Speaker 2: ain't gonna chew my cabbage twice. Figure it out, all right,
Speaker 2: do some math. I'm missing units, Danny, a lot of units, right?
Speaker 2: So is he getting one unit or a half? What
Speaker 2: is he getting? Ray?
Speaker 1: A guy like point three on that?
Speaker 2: I think, what's he get it?
Speaker 1: So he's gonna get point three on that? But I'll
Speaker 1: defend myself a little bit here.
Speaker 3: We used to do the decimal points and then we
Speaker 3: got rid of it last year because we were thinking
Speaker 3: we were just gonna round it out.
Speaker 2: And what's the point of betting a dog? Right? What's
Speaker 2: the point? Why would I ever bet a dog again?
Speaker 1: All Right, I'll make sure it's on there for now.
Speaker 2: Lost two and a half units last week, so you're
Speaker 2: a loser plus eleven and a half units, Larry, you're
Speaker 2: good with that?
Speaker 4: Yeah? I don't. I just say you lost a minus
Speaker 4: one seventy.
Speaker 2: No, plus one seventy. I lost a plus one seventy
Speaker 2: money line, then a minus one twenty I got.
Speaker 4: I think you should get a little plus one.
Speaker 2: I'm down to then I won plus one fifteen twice,
Speaker 2: so I'm up. I'm up ten cents. Uh. Dylan still
Speaker 2: has the big bet on the board with the Nuggets
Speaker 2: to win the NBA Finals plus nine hundred.
Speaker 1: Great, and don't forget about the Pirate's.
Speaker 2: Still in the World Series plus thirty thousand. Okay, uh.
Speaker 2: Bets for this week, Shay, I'm gonna start with you.
Speaker 2: It seems like you had a bad week last week.
Speaker 2: You weren't allowed to drink, you got in trouble with
Speaker 2: your roommate and still in trouble. Yeah, and not drinking.
Speaker 2: Still not drinking. Sober Nanny. It's great. I love it.
Speaker 2: You get to spend more time as soon as you
Speaker 2: start drinking than I'll come over to your house to
Speaker 2: do your I know, I'm looking forward to it. And
Speaker 2: she's gonna cook something. You ever had a cocoa Vaughn No,
Speaker 2: the chicken no, oh, Danny. Okay, but the last time
Speaker 2: you were so pissed off at your wife that you said,
Speaker 2: I don't want you to come over because the food's
Speaker 2: going to be crappy. Exactly. That's what she does. Was
Speaker 2: she going to make a bad meal on purpose? Absolutely?
Speaker 2: Because I was coming over? Yeah, no, no, no, because
Speaker 2: I'm in trouble, Like she knows. Why do I get
Speaker 2: penalized for you fucking up? Because you'd be in the house, Danny.
Speaker 2: She knows when I'm in trouble. She knows the way
Speaker 2: to my heart is through my stomach. And if she
Speaker 2: makes bad food, it's because she's mad at me. She
Speaker 2: can cook, she can really cook.
Speaker 1: And then Dan would just be guilty by association.
Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely, right, like we had what do we have
Speaker 2: last night? So when she sees me, she sees you eat,
Speaker 2: she wants to punish that. She would like burn ribs
Speaker 2: to hurt me. She would she would lash out in pain.
Speaker 2: All right, that's what she does. All right, But if
Speaker 2: I come over, I'm going to come over when you're
Speaker 2: out of the doghouse. Yeah, I'll be out of the
Speaker 2: doghouse next week. No, this whole month is going to.
Speaker 1: Be Something tells me you're going to get an extra week,
Speaker 1: and this.
Speaker 2: Whole this whole month is kind of lost. But July, yeah,
Speaker 2: it's my birthday month. We'll be all right, Yes again, birthday.
Speaker 2: What's been your longest punishment when anytime she's pregnant three
Speaker 2: times every time. Yeah, nine months, nine months of pains. Really,
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, she's mean as hell. She's pregnant, men as shit.
Speaker 2: She eats everything, cooks nothing. It's bad.
Speaker 1: No drinking.
Speaker 2: She yells at me, cusses me out. Yeah, I gotta
Speaker 2: go get her water all the time. It's bad, really bad.
Speaker 2: But you're lucky. I like kids. Otherwise i'd have zero
Speaker 2: because she is the worst pregnant woman in the world.
Speaker 2: She is violent. She wakes up every morning and chooses
Speaker 2: violence when she's pregnant every morning. How about we we
Speaker 2: turn our attention to It's hard, Danny. I know bets
Speaker 2: for this week, Shay. I'm gonna start with you. What
Speaker 2: do you have for me? I got Miami plus three
Speaker 2: and a half against Denver. I think they're gonna, you know,
Speaker 2: give a last gasp before they lose that series. And
Speaker 2: then I got used in Baseball lay in the one twenty,
Speaker 2: So I'm betting. Don't explain it. I'm vetting a dollar
Speaker 2: twenty to win a dollar and That's what I'm doing,
Speaker 2: right Verlin her plus one fifty five Againstrider. I got
Speaker 2: the White Sox once again. Plus one ten. That's a
Speaker 2: second game. There's a double header today, bang bang biscuit
Speaker 2: small permitting, will yet air quality? Right the second game?
Speaker 2: The second game should be fine? Yeah, I think I
Speaker 2: think both. It seems like it's okay, it's better today. Yeah,
Speaker 2: yesterday smell like smoke everywhere? One. No, it was bad, bad, bad.
Speaker 2: Larry your bets for this week?
Speaker 4: Okay? Are we counting what we did last night or now?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Yes you are, Okay, that's fine. I have just three
Speaker 4: baseball games, and then I did late at a Belmont bet.
Speaker 4: But the three baseball bets.
Speaker 2: Wait, what did you win from last night?
Speaker 4: No? I went to and two?
Speaker 2: Oh okay, all right, So you had Joker over fifty
Speaker 2: and a half points, rebounds and assists.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was fifty two and a half more I bet.
Speaker 4: I bet it at fifty two.
Speaker 2: Okay, but you lost it. No, No, he won that one.
Speaker 2: Jimmy Butler over thirty nine and a half rebounds, assists
Speaker 2: in points. Okay, the Nuggets money line won and gave
Speaker 2: Vincent over eighteen and a half points, rebounds and assists.
Speaker 2: You lost that, right, lost that? Okay?
Speaker 1: He went to double o seven. I think gave Vincent.
Speaker 2: Okay, what do you have down today?
Speaker 4: I have? I got when three pitchers who I recognize,
Speaker 4: the Dodgers for the Mets, VI Orlander and Game one
Speaker 4: of the Yankees with Severino. I'm just one unit each, right,
Speaker 4: and then I want a little one unit exactly box
Speaker 4: and the Belmont six seven eight.
Speaker 2: I want to follow that. Okay, one on those absolutely
Speaker 2: that exact. Bet Okat, come on, Layer, let's go okay
Speaker 2: here who.
Speaker 1: Said for ships and giggles?
Speaker 3: I want to do that, but not box a trifected
Speaker 3: eight seven six in order?
Speaker 2: Wow?
Speaker 1: Wow? And if that wins, I'm retiring.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, promise.
Speaker 1: Now what else do you have? Dyling so bad?
Speaker 2: Layer, You're done right, yep?
Speaker 4: Just okay seven eight exactly box.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 3: So last night I had Nuggets min is three under
Speaker 3: two fourteen and Aaron Gordon first basket which did not
Speaker 3: hit for Game four, I'm going two units Nuggets minus
Speaker 3: three and a half.
Speaker 1: I think they just.
Speaker 2: Are you gonna go Aaron Gordon first basket again?
Speaker 3: This is so Dan, I have a new strategy where
Speaker 3: I'm betting Aaron Gordon first basket until it fucking happens.
Speaker 1: Last night, he literally under the basket gets fouled.
Speaker 2: Okay, it's plus one thousand yep. Okay, So throwing anything
Speaker 2: else with the game tomorrow.
Speaker 1: Night, taking the under two ten and a half. I'm
Speaker 1: also just betting the under every.
Speaker 2: Game, okay, anything else?
Speaker 3: MLB unit on Mets Braves under eight and a half
Speaker 3: today and then tomorrow Mariner's money line against o'tanny and
Speaker 3: the Angels fall. And then tonight Golden Knights Panthers under
Speaker 3: six goals.
Speaker 1: They have to not score like one hundred.
Speaker 3: Goals one of these games, so why not tonight they're
Speaker 3: averaging eight goals a game.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so far okay? Us anything else?
Speaker 1: Yeah, And the RBC Canadian Open.
Speaker 3: Dan Taylor, well known Canadian top ten finish plus thirty
Speaker 3: five hundred.
Speaker 2: Well known Brian Boitana.
Speaker 1: It is Brianana, isn't it.
Speaker 2: Mackenzie Hughes is he another?
Speaker 3: Yeah, Cory Corner, and then there's a bunch of other
Speaker 3: I was like looking down the leader board and there's
Speaker 3: just like a pack of Canucks at the bottom.
Speaker 1: I've never even heard of.
Speaker 2: Can't trust Adam Hadwin.
Speaker 3: I think Adwin's Canadian beard, some French Canadian guy's name.
Speaker 3: I forget and can't pronounce Jim Carrey, Yes, Jim Carrey,
Speaker 3: Neil Young.
Speaker 2: Neil Young, Steve Nash, Steve, Justin Bieber, Justin Biebs. Yeah,
Speaker 2: who is the best Canadian though?
Speaker 1: Ever? Ever? Ever?
Speaker 2: Wayne?
Speaker 1: Actually?
Speaker 2: Yeah, wayn Wayne.
Speaker 1: I think everyone in Canada would probably say that too.
Speaker 1: Justin Bieber would probably say that.
Speaker 2: Rji Bier.
Speaker 1: Yeah, j Brett. He's look sort of the Wayne Gretzky
Speaker 1: of the NBA. He's looking better and better now as
Speaker 1: of recently. Oh, Jamal Murray's Canadian.
Speaker 2: Okay, Uh, don't trust him. So that's it. I think
Speaker 2: that we've we've accomplished what we set out to do
Speaker 2: here today. And uh, Shay is looking at the white clause,
Speaker 2: but he's not allowed to have any white claws. Dylan
Speaker 2: has one. I'm sure bad Larry has a Budweiser in
Speaker 2: his future.
Speaker 4: Yeah, later on tonight. I have a coke already from raised,
Speaker 4: but I'm heading back to meet a couple of boys
Speaker 4: over there. Mister, what are you doing? A few boys
Speaker 4: over there?
Speaker 2: Whoa we do?
Speaker 4: We're gonna go have lunch. What are you doing? Am
Speaker 4: I doing? Oh?
Speaker 2: It's the same thing you do every day? Yeah, Okay,
Speaker 2: Shay and Irving has podcast wherever you get your podcast,
Speaker 2: And once again you have not brought up your wife
Speaker 2: as a degenerate. No, the year cannot yet. But if
Speaker 2: she keeps going the way she's going, Danny, I mean,
Speaker 2: she might be, but but she listens to this or
Speaker 2: friends of yours listened to friends she's informed friends of hers,
Speaker 2: so friends of mine, I should say, listen to this,
Speaker 2: and then they talked to their wives about this, and
Speaker 2: then their wives talk to my wife about this, and the
Speaker 2: roommate just knows everything, which is blasphemy and awful. You
Speaker 2: don't have any energy today. You were down in the
Speaker 2: dumps man, you were Charlie Brown today, a little sickly
Speaker 2: DJ depression. They just keep playing the same song over
Speaker 2: and over. What would your song be? You remember the
Speaker 2: mash suicide is painless? Yeah, yeah, that's me right now. Okay,
Speaker 2: well it's depressing, nanny.
Speaker 1: What do you even do on the weekend? Me hang
Speaker 1: out with my kids, crochet or something.
Speaker 2: We got soccer, we got softball, we got uh dance,
Speaker 2: we got all kinds of crap. They do ballet some shit.
Speaker 2: Yesterday my kids started telling me that she's going to
Speaker 2: do acro dance. I said, what the fuck is an
Speaker 2: acro I don't think you said what the fuck is?
Speaker 2: I think on it? Okay uh, And then she said
Speaker 2: it's acrobats plus dancing. So now she's doing two different
Speaker 2: kinds of dance. So that means two different titles, two
Speaker 2: different times that I got to show up at some
Speaker 2: stupid auditorium at Fairfield and figure out where my family
Speaker 2: is and what they're doing. And then if you're not
Speaker 2: paying attention after the dance, the kid says, you weren't
Speaker 2: even looking at me. What were you doing? Well, I
Speaker 2: was checking the goddamn score, That's what I was doing,
Speaker 2: because it's fucking Saturday in the fall, Like, what do
Speaker 2: you want from me? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's not really fair.
Speaker 2: No, you have to get them familiar with what your
Speaker 2: lifestyle is all about. They know, they know, damn well,
Speaker 2: the roommate loves to block information, but they know, damn well. Wait,
Speaker 2: how young is your youngest? Two? No? Yeah, two, she'll
Speaker 2: be three in December. She sent me a video of
Speaker 2: her at the kitchen table. I was like, oh my god,
Speaker 2: she's nuts. She's my most violent child. If we had
Speaker 2: her first, i'd have one kid. She is the most
Speaker 2: violent child I've ever been around in my life. She's nuts.
Speaker 2: That's same with my youngest. Yeah, they're violent. She she
Speaker 2: was difficult. She hits the other kids, hits them like
Speaker 2: in the face. My youngest used to bite my other
Speaker 2: kids in the stomach. Yeah, bite them right in the stomach.
Speaker 2: That's aggressive, Yes, it is. It's like a diabetes. Sugar beaties.
Speaker 2: You got beat us, you got beat us. Uh, well,
Speaker 2: thanks for joining us. And Dan Patrick takes a gamble? Boy,
Speaker 2: did I take a gamble? Larry? It was great seeing
Speaker 2: you and we hope to see you again here in
Speaker 2: the neighborhood soon.
Speaker 4: I will be I will be back up when she
Speaker 4: starts drinking again.
Speaker 2: Thank you.
Speaker 4: I'm certainly not coming up. I'm certainly not coming up
Speaker 4: with him not drinking.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was lame, but the fuck Larry.
Speaker 1: Well, we weren't good enough entertainment.
Speaker 2: I don't think you guys were guys were fun.
Speaker 4: But I want I want it all, Greg Pillon, I
Speaker 4: appreciate I appreciate you showing me around Olford.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Larry.
Speaker 3: Also, I'm doing on the record that I did beat
Speaker 3: Larry and pool lost everything else, but I want that
Speaker 3: on the record and Larry game of pool.
Speaker 4: It was kind of like, you know, have you ever
Speaker 4: played a brill and the the q boll is neutral
Speaker 4: until your last shot. That's the way I play.
Speaker 2: All of a sudden, he'd you know, and we'll talk.
Speaker 2: We'll talk to you next week on Dan Patrick Takes
Speaker 2: a Gamble m hm