Speaker 1: First Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury Attorneys
Speaker 1: online at advocuslaw dot com.
Speaker 2: Lisia is on the phone today for a first day
Speaker 2: follow up and she's getting ghosted by a guy named James.
Speaker 2: So in a second we're going to call him and
Speaker 2: see if I'll tell us why he's a ghostinger and
Speaker 2: maybe get her another date. But first, Lesia, how long
Speaker 2: has it been since you heard from James.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's been about a week.
Speaker 3: And then how many times have you reached out to
Speaker 3: him in that time?
Speaker 1: Yeah, like kind of a bunch. I was, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: I was texting a bunch. You know, we had a
Speaker 1: great connection and you know, you know, I was we
Speaker 1: were trying to get together and you know, I texted
Speaker 1: a few times, and you know, we had a plan.
Speaker 1: He canceled. We felt like he needed the weekend to recover.
Speaker 1: I offered to make him soup, which he declined, and I,
Speaker 1: you know, and then after that, I texted him a
Speaker 1: couple of times. You know, he's feeling and like nothing.
Speaker 3: So, did your date happen or this was after the date?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 1: Well, well we had a first date, okay, okay, but
Speaker 1: then after that nothing happened.
Speaker 4: Okay, Well, tell us about the date.
Speaker 1: Well, we met Unhinge first of all, and like we
Speaker 1: talked a little bit, and we wanted to go out
Speaker 1: because we both like really like food and travel and stuff.
Speaker 1: And he's in a band and I used to sing
Speaker 1: in a band, so we had like a lot of
Speaker 1: great connections. And so we met for cocktails and we
Speaker 1: like bounced around and got tacos and ended up at
Speaker 1: this like karaoke place, which was really fun. After karaoke,
Speaker 1: we went back to his place and we were hanging
Speaker 1: out and like cuddling and stuff. But we did look up,
Speaker 1: but there was like a lot of like affection myself.
Speaker 1: And in the morning we kissed and like we pramned
Speaker 1: on seeing each other again like the next weekend. So
Speaker 1: that was the date.
Speaker 2: Is there anything that happened on the date that could
Speaker 2: have been awkward or something that would cause him to
Speaker 2: not want to talk to you again?
Speaker 1: So I talked this over like a bit, and I
Speaker 1: think there might have been which I like won't apologize for,
Speaker 1: and like I've been feeling bad about it. So like
Speaker 1: when we were like hanging out and cuddling, he like
Speaker 1: pulls down his phone to play me like a rough
Speaker 1: edit of his band's new song, and I was excited
Speaker 1: to hear it. I was glad he wanted to share
Speaker 1: it with me, And you know, because I was on
Speaker 1: the music background, I didn't feel like I knew to
Speaker 1: hold back what I thought, you know, So I mean
Speaker 1: I told him, I was like, I think this is
Speaker 1: like a great idea for a song. I said, like
Speaker 1: some of the lyrics were a little cheesy, and you know,
Speaker 1: his voice was a little tipsy and certain points, and
Speaker 1: like one of the lyrics in particular was like about
Speaker 1: her love being like a sugar rush eating a box
Speaker 1: of Krispy cream or something. Okay, I like laughed at that,
Speaker 1: and then I kept like asking him if I made
Speaker 1: him feel like he was eating a box of Kristy cream.
Speaker 1: And I thought it was being funny, like I was joking,
Speaker 1: and like I think I may have crushed him. I
Speaker 1: don't know, maybe I took it too far. So I
Speaker 1: feel like he's apologized.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I mean it sounds like you were being
Speaker 3: more playful.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: No, I was just saying, like that's how I felt,
Speaker 1: like that's what the intention was.
Speaker 5: Jubill, you are doing music now too, so like think
Speaker 5: about this scenario. Wouldn't it be just kind of cute, like,
Speaker 5: you're not are you going to be offended?
Speaker 4: No, I wouldn't be.
Speaker 2: I'm also a super harsh critic on myself, so I'd
Speaker 2: be like, you're right, the whole.
Speaker 4: Thing is craft. I'll throw it out. You're all over that,
Speaker 4: I quit it all.
Speaker 2: So I would just totally be like, yeah, thanks for
Speaker 2: the honest feedback I saw.
Speaker 5: That would also be a major turnoff and problem. Also, Okay,
Speaker 5: so maybe maybe he was a little but hurt.
Speaker 1: Maybe I mean it might be so I feel like,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I feel like we need to get
Speaker 1: him on the phone, Like you need to get a
Speaker 1: third party and to get him on the phone's phone
Speaker 1: because he's just ghosting me so like and I just
Speaker 1: want to apologize.
Speaker 4: Well, we'll try to figure it out for you.
Speaker 2: We'll play a song and we'll come back and then
Speaker 2: we'll call him and see if it tell us why
Speaker 2: he's ghosting you and maybe get to another date with
Speaker 2: krispy Kreme Boy. Okay, should we not call him chrispy
Speaker 2: Creme boy? He disappear, all right, Well, p leas'll come
Speaker 2: back and get your first A follow up next. Right
Speaker 2: in the middle of our first date follow up if
Speaker 2: you're just joining us, Alesha is on the phone and
Speaker 2: she's getting ghosted by a guy named James. So we're
Speaker 2: about to call him and see if you'll tell us
Speaker 2: why he's ghostinger and maybe get her another date. But first, Lisha,
Speaker 2: why don't you catch us up on your situation?
Speaker 6: Yeah, so, I when I had a date with this
Speaker 6: guy James, it like went really well.
Speaker 1: We had cocktails and tacos, and we had karaoke and
Speaker 1: all this stuff, and you know, we bonded because he's
Speaker 1: in a band and I used to sing in a band,
Speaker 1: and you know, we have a lot of common interests.
Speaker 1: And I feel like and he hasn't tested me back
Speaker 1: in a week, so and I feel like something might
Speaker 1: have gone wrong the night we were on the date.
Speaker 1: I feel like I might have kind of heard his
Speaker 1: feelings making one of one of his lyrics which involves
Speaker 1: Krispy Kreme, which I kept springing up. No, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I feel like I might have sent him and I
Speaker 1: need to apologize. And also he's ghosting me.
Speaker 4: So that's where we are, all right, Are you ready
Speaker 4: for us to call him?
Speaker 7: Sure?
Speaker 4: Okay? Here we go. Hello him as speaking to James. Please, yeah,
Speaker 4: speaking James. How are you?
Speaker 8: Man?
Speaker 2: My name is Jubell. I'm calling from a radio show.
Speaker 2: It's called The Jubil Show.
Speaker 3: Hi, James, I'm Nina also on the show. Hi, and
Speaker 3: I'm Victoria.
Speaker 7: How are you? Oh? Cool, wonderful. I'm doing good man,
Speaker 7: I'm geting any culs on radio? But what's up?
Speaker 4: Have you ever listened to the show before?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, thank you? Yeah. Have you ever heard a
Speaker 4: first date follow up before?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah I have? Is this one of these things?
Speaker 4: First day follow up?
Speaker 2: You know that's a segment where if you're ghosting somebody,
Speaker 2: they can email us and then ask goes to call
Speaker 2: you and ask why you're ghosting them. Somebody emailed us
Speaker 2: about you, James, Oh boy?
Speaker 4: Any idea? Who would be?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 8: Maybe someone I met someone online, like a little more
Speaker 8: than a week ago.
Speaker 4: Is that someone's name? Lisha?
Speaker 7: Yeah? Yeah, Lisha?
Speaker 4: Oh yeah yeah. Well.
Speaker 2: Lisia emailed us and told us about your day. She
Speaker 2: said she really liked you, but she's confused. Can you
Speaker 2: tell us why you're ghosting her?
Speaker 8: I really liked her, but man, she's too much. She
Speaker 8: texted me on Saturday to ask about Well, first of all,
Speaker 8: I got sick, right, so, like I got sick a
Speaker 8: little bit afterwards, but not the runa nothing, But like,
Speaker 8: you know, she texted me on Saturday to ask me
Speaker 8: about soup, and then again to tell me good night
Speaker 8: and then text me a list of vitamins I should be.
Speaker 4: Taking because you were sick.
Speaker 8: Yeah, you know, it was like it was like a
Speaker 8: trip or a DoorDash GNC, you know, the whole bag full.
Speaker 8: And then like not soon after asking if I missed her,
Speaker 8: this this whole thing about like if I wanted Krispy Kremes, Like,
Speaker 8: ask me if I wanted Krispy Krean. It's a it's
Speaker 8: a joke about some stupid lyric I made, and and
Speaker 8: and I mean just more text on and on and on.
Speaker 8: I'm not even giving you all.
Speaker 3: That was one day that happened all on the same day.
Speaker 8: Yeah, and this is someone I had just talked to
Speaker 8: online that came over, we cuddled, I mean, the sweet
Speaker 8: it was great, you know, don't get me wrong.
Speaker 7: But after all this just piling on and just happening
Speaker 7: so soon I just.
Speaker 8: Stopped responding because like I needed to rest, and I
Speaker 8: wake up. It's like, I mean I lose like twelve
Speaker 8: text messages from her. I don't respond, but I get
Speaker 8: even more the next day. Eventually, I just I just
Speaker 8: block her because I feel like that kind of energy
Speaker 8: I felt it gives me a lot of anxiety.
Speaker 7: It's like, and I'm gonna go with the flow kind
Speaker 7: of guy.
Speaker 8: And when I just kissed Raw Raw, it's like, first off,
Speaker 8: it doesn't know me feel better, but then it's like,
Speaker 8: this is someone I just met.
Speaker 7: Sweet girl.
Speaker 8: I mean, she came over, it was great, the date
Speaker 8: was amazing, Karaoke was fun, and yeah, like we talked,
Speaker 8: thought it was going to turn into something. But then
Speaker 8: the text, just the messaging, it was just nah, nah,
Speaker 8: it was just a note going.
Speaker 3: I mean, it sounds like she was just concerned because
Speaker 3: you were sick.
Speaker 5: Now, granted, twelve and maybe twenty four text messages might
Speaker 5: be a lot in two days, but the initial reach
Speaker 5: out probably was kind of nice.
Speaker 6: Though.
Speaker 8: No, I mean, I get it, she's very sweet, but
Speaker 8: it's just someone I just started talking to online and
Speaker 8: it just started giving me the vibe that this is
Speaker 8: the kind of person that's going to.
Speaker 7: Give me a whole lot of anxiety. I don't. I
Speaker 7: just wanted peace.
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, speaking of peace, James, I will let you
Speaker 2: know that Lisha's actually on the phone listening and wants
Speaker 2: to talk to you.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Hi, Oh huh, Alicia do a problem getting close to people,
Speaker 1: Like do you know how to ask when anyone cares
Speaker 1: about you? Like I was just trying to show you
Speaker 1: that I cared And I'm like actually a good caretaker
Speaker 1: in like times like this.
Speaker 8: I get it, But it's just we just had one
Speaker 8: date after a little bit of online conversation, and I
Speaker 8: just feel, Look, you're sweet, wonderful, but I just feel
Speaker 8: that we're nowhere close to the come over and make
Speaker 8: me soup stage of this relationship.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, Well, you said on your hind that you
Speaker 1: wanted to be intentional about the time we spend together
Speaker 1: and to prioritize the growth, and I feel like I
Speaker 1: was doing that. So I don't know what there is about.
Speaker 8: This that you don't you wouldn't like, can we go
Speaker 8: further than or can we have a relationship first? Can
Speaker 8: we like have some other there's there's steps to this before.
Speaker 1: Or okay, wait wait, I'm not ready to be in
Speaker 1: a relationship with you.
Speaker 8: Oh look, that's that's that's not what I said. Okay,
Speaker 8: that's that's not what I said. It's I feel there's
Speaker 8: a little miscommunication here.
Speaker 1: Well yeah, I mean I'm not well, you just mentioned
Speaker 1: wanting to have a relationship first, Like you talk about
Speaker 1: me texting a lot, and you're already talking about a relationship.
Speaker 1: So I don't know what the problem is with my
Speaker 1: texting when you're like, I want a relationship right now?
Speaker 8: What. No, I'm not I'm not saying right now. It's
Speaker 8: just that I just don't want to jump into things
Speaker 8: that just lead to anxiety. And just like already we're
Speaker 8: checking each other's mental health. Like I'm just trying to
Speaker 8: just go go with the vibe that we had that
Speaker 8: was that was real good. It just felt like this
Speaker 8: was this was just in a different place, and I
Speaker 8: was just like, I don't.
Speaker 7: Want to grow with this.
Speaker 1: You are living way too fast, James.
Speaker 8: Look, I just I just I'm I'm all for like
Speaker 8: all those texts in the soup, but I just feel
Speaker 8: that there's there's just a sequence to it that just.
Speaker 7: You know, rocks my boat a certain way.
Speaker 8: And and like I'm sorry for for miscommunicating or or like,
Speaker 8: you know, just going outside the vibe that we had
Speaker 8: and I just feel I just feel like we want
Speaker 8: the wrong direction with that.
Speaker 4: Well, James, would you like another date with Lisa?
Speaker 6: We'll pay for it, James, I just so you know,
Speaker 6: I will go on another date with you, but I
Speaker 6: just want to let you know, like I'm not gonna
Speaker 6: get together with you right.
Speaker 7: Now, just so you know.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 8: So, uh, like I said, I'm not interested in rushing
Speaker 8: in and getting together right now. I I'm sorry about
Speaker 8: the miscommunication, but I'm willing to give this another go,
Speaker 8: just as long as you don't mention the Krispy Kremes.
Speaker 1: Okay, but we're not going to be like dating yet,
Speaker 1: Like this is just a date date, not like a
Speaker 1: dating date.
Speaker 7: Look, don't worry, I'm not trying to wipe you up
Speaker 7: just yet.
Speaker 1: Wait a minute, you want to wife me up like that?
Speaker 1: Hold on, why are we jumping to marriage?
Speaker 2: I don't think James wants to marry you yet. I
Speaker 2: think you guys should just go out one more day
Speaker 2: and see how it goes.
Speaker 1: Okay, Okay, yeah, all right, you will first date, follow
Speaker 1: up