1 00:00:01,920 --> 00:00:05,399 Speaker 1: Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heeart Radio Podcast. 2 00:00:06,519 --> 00:00:11,760 Speaker 2: Okay, so this week we have Jada Pinkett Smith coming on. 3 00:00:11,920 --> 00:00:15,440 Speaker 2: She has a new book out. It's called Worthy, a gripping, 4 00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:19,560 Speaker 2: at times painfully honest and ultimately inspirational memoir from global 5 00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:22,920 Speaker 2: superstar and creator the Red Table Talk series Jada Pinkett Smith. 6 00:00:24,040 --> 00:00:27,400 Speaker 2: She talks about depression, She talks about the slap. She 7 00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:29,800 Speaker 2: talks about childhood. 8 00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:34,640 Speaker 1: She grew up with drug dealer, her in the streets. 9 00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:39,240 Speaker 1: On the streets yeah, Baltimore, m hm. I mean things 10 00:00:39,280 --> 00:00:42,239 Speaker 1: that you think you know, you think you know. 11 00:00:42,320 --> 00:00:43,520 Speaker 3: You have no idea. 12 00:00:44,320 --> 00:00:45,839 Speaker 2: But now I'm reading the book though, too. I mean, 13 00:00:45,840 --> 00:00:47,760 Speaker 2: you guys definitely should pick it up. Because when we 14 00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:52,200 Speaker 2: got sent the advance copy, I couldn't put it down. 15 00:00:52,880 --> 00:00:57,840 Speaker 1: I was surprised. Yeah, and I think the honesty is 16 00:00:58,240 --> 00:01:01,200 Speaker 1: like the core of it for me, just how honest. 17 00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:04,360 Speaker 1: And also we always think we know somebody, but we 18 00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:07,240 Speaker 1: just you don't know why people are the way they are. 19 00:01:10,160 --> 00:01:13,720 Speaker 1: I know, Craamer, big, big deep bread. 20 00:01:14,520 --> 00:01:14,640 Speaker 3: Uh. 21 00:01:14,880 --> 00:01:16,720 Speaker 2: But she's actually in the waiting room, so let's just 22 00:01:16,760 --> 00:01:17,640 Speaker 2: get her one. 23 00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:24,680 Speaker 1: Hey, girl, you got your little fun. 24 00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:29,760 Speaker 2: I know how things have changed since that. 25 00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:34,559 Speaker 1: Girl. 26 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:39,480 Speaker 2: I know, thank you, congrats to you, thank you because 27 00:01:39,520 --> 00:01:41,640 Speaker 2: this is about you, So. 28 00:01:42,120 --> 00:01:44,520 Speaker 1: Thank you, Jada. I feel better just being in this 29 00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:46,440 Speaker 1: room with you. I needed to see your smile and 30 00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:48,040 Speaker 1: just have a minute with your energy. 31 00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:49,640 Speaker 3: Oh, thank you. 32 00:01:49,920 --> 00:01:51,320 Speaker 1: I did be with you. 33 00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:51,800 Speaker 3: Guys. 34 00:01:52,200 --> 00:01:53,040 Speaker 1: You're so sweet. 35 00:01:53,880 --> 00:01:56,279 Speaker 2: Yeah, I know we were just obviously we know it's 36 00:01:56,520 --> 00:01:59,040 Speaker 2: press week and you're you've got a lot going on. 37 00:01:59,040 --> 00:02:01,120 Speaker 2: So just thank you for spending your time with us 38 00:02:01,360 --> 00:02:05,640 Speaker 2: right now and just being open and so authentic. And 39 00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:09,239 Speaker 2: that's something that I've always and I think it's interesting 40 00:02:09,280 --> 00:02:11,560 Speaker 2: as we were talking, because you know, you walked into 41 00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:16,679 Speaker 2: the this a little nervous, nervous, and you know, she's like, well, 42 00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:18,680 Speaker 2: how is she? And I'm like, she's great. And you know, 43 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,320 Speaker 2: obviously I was nervous when I sat down with your 44 00:02:20,320 --> 00:02:22,400 Speaker 2: red table talk because you're you're Jada, and you're just 45 00:02:23,280 --> 00:02:25,560 Speaker 2: you know, it's I was. I was nervous. And then 46 00:02:25,600 --> 00:02:28,280 Speaker 2: the second I met you, there's something about your energy 47 00:02:28,320 --> 00:02:32,919 Speaker 2: that just made me feel safe. And I told Kristen, 48 00:02:33,600 --> 00:02:36,720 Speaker 2: and that's safe. Safety for me is the biggest thing. 49 00:02:36,760 --> 00:02:38,400 Speaker 2: That's when I can because I come from just that 50 00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:41,640 Speaker 2: really anxious and place and so when I felt that, 51 00:02:41,720 --> 00:02:43,720 Speaker 2: I was like, no, like she's she's cool. And you 52 00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:45,680 Speaker 2: said something today that I was like, Oh, that's that's 53 00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:47,320 Speaker 2: interesting that you you felt that. 54 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:50,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's it's interesting to me because what I know 55 00:02:50,360 --> 00:02:53,280 Speaker 1: of you only is from media, right, which is so 56 00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:57,440 Speaker 1: often unfair, unkind, unjust for the most part. And I 57 00:02:57,480 --> 00:02:59,359 Speaker 1: know that because this is my best friend. So I've 58 00:02:59,360 --> 00:03:01,160 Speaker 1: really been in the of it, on the backside of 59 00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:04,840 Speaker 1: a lot of things. But it's funny because I have 60 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:09,200 Speaker 1: always You've always been perceived to me. I'm just you know, 61 00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:13,320 Speaker 1: forty two year old woman in America right right, always 62 00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:18,760 Speaker 1: perceived to me is this extra strong, can handle anything woman, right, 63 00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:22,120 Speaker 1: which I love and I identify with. I mean, there's 64 00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:24,240 Speaker 1: so many pieces of your book that I just felt 65 00:03:24,240 --> 00:03:26,560 Speaker 1: like were sentences that made me tear up. Also like 66 00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:31,399 Speaker 1: wrapped your arms around me in words, so many things. 67 00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:34,080 Speaker 1: There's a safety quote I actually we cannot forget to 68 00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:37,720 Speaker 1: revisit in your book. But I was telling Janna, I said, 69 00:03:37,760 --> 00:03:42,120 Speaker 1: it's crazy how media can make you almost feel too strong, right, 70 00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:46,320 Speaker 1: Like the perception is like you know, like I was like, 71 00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:48,720 Speaker 1: if I misspeak, is she going to you know? Also, 72 00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:51,800 Speaker 1: Hollywood mixed with all of our stories. Sometimes it gets like, 73 00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:53,840 Speaker 1: is this person going to be a kind person? You 74 00:03:53,880 --> 00:03:57,440 Speaker 1: know where I'm extra lovey heart on sleeve. Listen, there's 75 00:03:57,680 --> 00:03:59,680 Speaker 1: enough Detroit still in both of us that we can 76 00:03:59,680 --> 00:04:02,400 Speaker 1: hold our own. But I'm like, you know, I just 77 00:04:02,440 --> 00:04:04,600 Speaker 1: want to make sure that I'm always being respectful. But 78 00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:07,960 Speaker 1: then I do want to ask questions like who are you? 79 00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:12,760 Speaker 1: You know, who's Jada real Jada? Not what we know? 80 00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:15,280 Speaker 1: And what they what the storyline or the agenda is, 81 00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:17,400 Speaker 1: or the PR people or who has the bigger, better 82 00:04:17,480 --> 00:04:22,400 Speaker 1: PR People like you are such a beautiful force in 83 00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:23,320 Speaker 1: so many ways. 84 00:04:24,279 --> 00:04:24,839 Speaker 3: Thank you. 85 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:27,640 Speaker 1: I mean it, you made my heart. 86 00:04:27,720 --> 00:04:29,480 Speaker 3: You made my heart smile with that one. 87 00:04:29,720 --> 00:04:33,599 Speaker 1: Yeah, well it's real. I mean Baltimore tough, I mean 88 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:38,040 Speaker 1: be more as no jokes, this not at all. 89 00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:41,160 Speaker 3: And I think, you know, for me, I think, you know, 90 00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:44,280 Speaker 3: I have to. I'm just learning as I get older 91 00:04:44,360 --> 00:04:47,920 Speaker 3: to kind of let go of some of those defenses 92 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:52,480 Speaker 3: that you know, I had to use to survive, you know, 93 00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:55,800 Speaker 3: and they were so embedded in me. Sometimes it's difficult 94 00:04:55,920 --> 00:05:01,000 Speaker 3: to to let those defenses down and just kind of 95 00:05:01,160 --> 00:05:07,120 Speaker 3: be more vulnerable, specifically specifically in media spaces, you know, 96 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:12,520 Speaker 3: because I don't consider media spaces safe spaces, you know. 97 00:05:12,640 --> 00:05:14,200 Speaker 3: So if you see me on the red carpet or 98 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:17,200 Speaker 3: if you see me doing an interview, like, I'm always 99 00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:21,279 Speaker 3: kind of, you know, in that survival mode. And so 100 00:05:21,400 --> 00:05:24,240 Speaker 3: I've had to really learn how to in my process 101 00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:27,960 Speaker 3: in my journey of worthy as like finding my strength 102 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:33,039 Speaker 3: in my vulnerability, finding you know, finding my strength in 103 00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:37,320 Speaker 3: the heartbreak of it all. You know, it's like finding 104 00:05:37,400 --> 00:05:44,280 Speaker 3: my strength in surrender, finding my strength in my softness, 105 00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:48,920 Speaker 3: you know, and not being afraid of those areas, you know. 106 00:05:49,160 --> 00:05:53,680 Speaker 3: And so this, this whole journey for me has really 107 00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:56,800 Speaker 3: like helped me with that. Like I don't have to 108 00:05:58,360 --> 00:06:03,039 Speaker 3: I don't have to take on people's perception of me. 109 00:06:03,640 --> 00:06:05,960 Speaker 3: I don't have to defend myself. I don't have to 110 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:07,919 Speaker 3: do any of that, right, But it's taken me a 111 00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:09,719 Speaker 3: long time to figure that out. 112 00:06:11,880 --> 00:06:16,279 Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think you know that's that's the beauty 113 00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:19,560 Speaker 2: in with you too. And something where you wrote in 114 00:06:19,560 --> 00:06:21,640 Speaker 2: your book, and I'm gonna pull up my notes right here, 115 00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:25,000 Speaker 2: but you basically said when I saw this was also 116 00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:28,200 Speaker 2: in one of the Red Table talks, is you brought 117 00:06:28,200 --> 00:06:32,600 Speaker 2: a lot to your relationship from your past and your upbringing, 118 00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:33,360 Speaker 2: which we all do. 119 00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:36,320 Speaker 1: But I felt very in a way. I almost was like. 120 00:06:36,279 --> 00:06:39,080 Speaker 2: Protective, not protective, but I was like I wanted to 121 00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:42,560 Speaker 2: be well, well, Jada, like so does the next one, 122 00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:45,080 Speaker 2: so so did so did Will or so did everyone 123 00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:45,839 Speaker 2: else that you're with. 124 00:06:46,960 --> 00:06:51,719 Speaker 1: And so I felt like how do I say this? 125 00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:55,920 Speaker 2: Like there was a piece of me that, just like you, 126 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:59,240 Speaker 2: deserve to feel worthy and to feel loved, and I 127 00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:02,200 Speaker 2: know that no man can make us feel that way. 128 00:07:02,720 --> 00:07:05,120 Speaker 2: So where do you think we get lost in that 129 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:09,000 Speaker 2: piece of that self discovery and that self worth. 130 00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:17,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think from my my journey, I really was 131 00:07:17,720 --> 00:07:23,960 Speaker 3: expecting my relationships to substitute that which I didn't have 132 00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:31,440 Speaker 3: for myself, whether it was self consideration, self respect, you know, 133 00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:36,920 Speaker 3: coming from you know, being the child of my mother 134 00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:39,680 Speaker 3: who you know was a heroin addict for most of 135 00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:45,920 Speaker 3: my childhood, codependency, you know, it was like, Okay, that 136 00:07:46,320 --> 00:07:51,320 Speaker 3: was my symbol of love. You sacrifice yourself for the 137 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:59,760 Speaker 3: people that you love. You, you deal with your boundary 138 00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:05,720 Speaker 3: being you know, constantly violated or you know, so all 139 00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:08,920 Speaker 3: of these kind of aberated ideas of what love is, 140 00:08:08,960 --> 00:08:14,080 Speaker 3: and so coming into a relationship, expecting that man to 141 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:19,200 Speaker 3: fill every void that I had, and then also having 142 00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:25,280 Speaker 3: these really false ideas of what love looks like, what 143 00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:30,160 Speaker 3: love feels like, and so just the combination of that, 144 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:33,280 Speaker 3: and I think we all come with our stuff, right, 145 00:08:33,320 --> 00:08:36,440 Speaker 3: And that's why in the book, I really spend more 146 00:08:36,520 --> 00:08:43,839 Speaker 3: time thinking about my part because to me, that is 147 00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:47,320 Speaker 3: how that's how I define taking back my power because 148 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:51,160 Speaker 3: for so long me looking at what somebody else was 149 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:54,760 Speaker 3: doing and trying to change that person's behavior is what 150 00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:58,320 Speaker 3: kept me stuck in a cycle of pain, which kept 151 00:08:58,320 --> 00:09:03,960 Speaker 3: me stuck. So I've learned to recognize my part. First, 152 00:09:04,480 --> 00:09:07,800 Speaker 3: I can recognize what the other person, what their story is, 153 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:10,720 Speaker 3: and what's going on over there. But I know ultimately 154 00:09:11,360 --> 00:09:16,040 Speaker 3: that I have the power to change whatever's happening through 155 00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:18,800 Speaker 3: me being willing to change myself. 156 00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:23,000 Speaker 2: Well, there's there's growth in that because I kind of 157 00:09:23,080 --> 00:09:27,160 Speaker 2: felt the same thing with my past. Like after my divorce, 158 00:09:27,160 --> 00:09:28,920 Speaker 2: I start dating something else, I'm like, I'm just repeating 159 00:09:28,920 --> 00:09:29,520 Speaker 2: the same pattern. 160 00:09:29,559 --> 00:09:30,559 Speaker 1: This is actually I could. 161 00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:33,360 Speaker 2: Blame the men so the rest of my life, and 162 00:09:33,400 --> 00:09:36,640 Speaker 2: that's going to get me literally nowhere. The problem isn't them, Yeah, 163 00:09:36,640 --> 00:09:39,320 Speaker 2: they're maybe the stuff they brought to it was bad, 164 00:09:39,360 --> 00:09:41,520 Speaker 2: but I was the one that had to look in 165 00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:43,960 Speaker 2: the mirror and do the work. Yeah, Like that was 166 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:47,440 Speaker 2: on me to go, oh crap, like it's actually I 167 00:09:47,480 --> 00:09:49,280 Speaker 2: am the common denominator. 168 00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:51,640 Speaker 1: Right, And it is interesting because in your book, so 169 00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:58,240 Speaker 1: I severe independence is something a default too. Oh yeah, 170 00:09:58,760 --> 00:10:01,800 Speaker 1: hard and so so I mean, like you know, I've 171 00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:04,080 Speaker 1: like openly said, like my sweet husband, like, how do 172 00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:05,840 Speaker 1: you hug a bag of razor blades? Like I want 173 00:10:05,840 --> 00:10:08,280 Speaker 1: to be hugged. But then also he's like, I don't 174 00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:10,600 Speaker 1: know how to come at you right, right, Like girl, 175 00:10:10,640 --> 00:10:13,200 Speaker 1: like I'm trying, but I don't know. And there's something 176 00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:15,560 Speaker 1: you said. And I think this sentence is one of 177 00:10:15,559 --> 00:10:19,600 Speaker 1: the sentences of so many I can't express to you 178 00:10:19,679 --> 00:10:22,840 Speaker 1: enough how much of this book is just like almost 179 00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:25,839 Speaker 1: parts of it reading my own diary, Like different characters, 180 00:10:25,880 --> 00:10:29,720 Speaker 1: different names, but so much similarity. There's a part in 181 00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:33,080 Speaker 1: the book, in the chapter University of the b Moore 182 00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:35,360 Speaker 1: Streets where you say, and I think Janna and I 183 00:10:35,440 --> 00:10:39,920 Speaker 1: both identify with this, probably to the core of our DNA. 184 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:43,280 Speaker 1: You say, what I needed was a level of independence 185 00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:47,160 Speaker 1: so that I could create my own safety. Yeah, and 186 00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:50,679 Speaker 1: then you say home no longer gave me that. Yep, 187 00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:54,000 Speaker 1: like I feel it makes me want to cry. Yeah, 188 00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:58,360 Speaker 1: that feels almost like biblical to like me truth wise, 189 00:10:58,920 --> 00:11:02,920 Speaker 1: right you? So when you take someone as sturdy as you, 190 00:11:02,920 --> 00:11:05,520 Speaker 1: as independent as you, and I think that one of 191 00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:08,200 Speaker 1: the things that three of us probably share in common 192 00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:12,280 Speaker 1: is maybe being scrutinized sometimes or maybe being two independent 193 00:11:12,360 --> 00:11:15,440 Speaker 1: or blow you know whatever. The narrative is, how do 194 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:20,960 Speaker 1: you drop that independence when you enter a relationship and 195 00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:23,199 Speaker 1: I mean you're you're it's not just a relationship. We're 196 00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:25,960 Speaker 1: talking like we're talking Will freaking Smith. I mean, this 197 00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:28,240 Speaker 1: is no you know, these are no these are people 198 00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:30,719 Speaker 1: we all know and well we all know of I 199 00:11:30,760 --> 00:11:32,800 Speaker 1: should say that's a more fair way to put it. 200 00:11:32,880 --> 00:11:35,720 Speaker 1: But how do you come into a relationship with someone 201 00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:38,120 Speaker 1: who probably is also because he's a human being coming 202 00:11:38,160 --> 00:11:42,240 Speaker 1: in with his own things and go like what, how 203 00:11:42,320 --> 00:11:45,600 Speaker 1: do you own the pieces of it and say I'm sorry? 204 00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:47,880 Speaker 1: Is there a defining point for you where you go? 205 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:51,960 Speaker 1: I know, in this moment, I did something that helped 206 00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:53,760 Speaker 1: change the course of this for better or worse. 207 00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:58,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think for me really learning myself right, once 208 00:11:58,720 --> 00:12:01,760 Speaker 3: I started getting out of the blome game of oh 209 00:12:01,840 --> 00:12:06,440 Speaker 3: blaming will for you know whatever, for everything basically right, 210 00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:11,320 Speaker 3: And took some time to myself to realize, oh, no, chick, 211 00:12:11,400 --> 00:12:15,160 Speaker 3: you're the common denominator, right, So once I really was 212 00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:19,360 Speaker 3: willing to embrace that and then really look at Okay, 213 00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:26,199 Speaker 3: let's look at how you function and how those particular 214 00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:31,720 Speaker 3: defense mechanisms, those particular defaults play a part in the 215 00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:39,120 Speaker 3: dynamic within yourself that also creates this dynamic with your partner, right, 216 00:12:39,320 --> 00:12:42,959 Speaker 3: And I had to really break it down. So through 217 00:12:43,600 --> 00:12:47,800 Speaker 3: my journey and therapy, through my journey with plant medicine, 218 00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:52,920 Speaker 3: I really had to create an intimate relationship with myself 219 00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:56,760 Speaker 3: so that I could understand through and through what that 220 00:12:56,840 --> 00:13:03,080 Speaker 3: common denominator was, right, and then really be willing to 221 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:07,800 Speaker 3: be super like, to be really vigilant when I'm relating, 222 00:13:08,480 --> 00:13:11,040 Speaker 3: so that I go, oh, there I go again, that 223 00:13:11,200 --> 00:13:15,200 Speaker 3: judgment that tone that then triggers him, you know what 224 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:18,560 Speaker 3: I mean, And then it's like, okay, pull it back. 225 00:13:18,679 --> 00:13:22,199 Speaker 3: Was that loving? Was that kind? No, you're being judgmental 226 00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:24,240 Speaker 3: and you're and the punisher is here? 227 00:13:24,960 --> 00:13:28,959 Speaker 1: Does that also feel unsafe too? Because when you are 228 00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:31,800 Speaker 1: wired the way you're wired, and and from environment too. 229 00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:34,200 Speaker 1: This is like a nurture over nature, Like this is 230 00:13:34,240 --> 00:13:36,240 Speaker 1: the ultimate right, Like you had to do what you 231 00:13:36,240 --> 00:13:39,040 Speaker 1: had to do to survive, to be I mean, through 232 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:42,440 Speaker 1: your teens, through all of this. When when that's happening 233 00:13:42,559 --> 00:13:46,920 Speaker 1: for you, are you then going like hold up, like 234 00:13:47,480 --> 00:13:49,280 Speaker 1: I need I mean, is it Is it a moment 235 00:13:49,320 --> 00:13:51,240 Speaker 1: where you just stop in your tracks and go, this 236 00:13:51,360 --> 00:13:53,840 Speaker 1: is so vulnerable that now all the safety's gone. Because 237 00:13:53,880 --> 00:13:56,720 Speaker 1: I think that is where I sometimes struggle. Right, if 238 00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:59,720 Speaker 1: I get too vulnerable, if I get too honest, right, 239 00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:02,640 Speaker 1: then I'm not safe anymore because now you're seeing parts 240 00:14:02,640 --> 00:14:04,640 Speaker 1: of me that the razor blade floor it gets used 241 00:14:04,679 --> 00:14:07,240 Speaker 1: against you, which has been right. 242 00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:10,679 Speaker 3: So that's where that's where we have to develop a 243 00:14:10,840 --> 00:14:17,120 Speaker 3: deeper sense of security within ourselves and so and that 244 00:14:17,120 --> 00:14:21,920 Speaker 3: that's a really deep subject because in order to feel 245 00:14:22,160 --> 00:14:27,120 Speaker 3: safe in our vulnerability, we cannot expect that safety to 246 00:14:27,240 --> 00:14:31,720 Speaker 3: come out from the outside, right. We can't expect our 247 00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:34,120 Speaker 3: partners to behave a certain way to make us feel 248 00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:38,040 Speaker 3: safe for us to go into these spaces within ourselves. Right, 249 00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:41,160 Speaker 3: So I had to really learn how to create that 250 00:14:41,400 --> 00:14:45,200 Speaker 3: internal safety. I had to trust. Now for me, it 251 00:14:45,240 --> 00:14:49,640 Speaker 3: was more about getting in contact with a higher power, right, 252 00:14:49,840 --> 00:14:58,200 Speaker 3: and really sitting with some intense, vulnerable emotions alone that 253 00:14:58,320 --> 00:14:59,440 Speaker 3: I thought were going to kill me. 254 00:15:01,320 --> 00:15:04,160 Speaker 2: Well, those were the thoughts in the ayahuasca, right, like ya, 255 00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:05,840 Speaker 2: kill yourself, kill yourself. 256 00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:07,320 Speaker 1: You don't you deserve to die? 257 00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:10,920 Speaker 3: Right, those thoughts, And so that was one of that 258 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:17,440 Speaker 3: was probably the beginning of me creating that intimate relationship 259 00:15:17,480 --> 00:15:20,440 Speaker 3: that I'm talking about. And it took me and me 260 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:24,160 Speaker 3: to get through that. So this is where I started 261 00:15:24,160 --> 00:15:28,040 Speaker 3: to develop that emotional trust in those spaces of vulnerability 262 00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:35,480 Speaker 3: that were really dark, right, and really intense. And so 263 00:15:36,840 --> 00:15:42,680 Speaker 3: I had to learn to practice being in those vulnerable, emotional, 264 00:15:43,360 --> 00:15:46,440 Speaker 3: intense spaces with myself. I had to learn how to 265 00:15:46,520 --> 00:15:48,200 Speaker 3: parent myself. I had to learn how to be my 266 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:50,400 Speaker 3: own mother. I had to learn how to be my 267 00:15:50,440 --> 00:15:53,680 Speaker 3: own father, my own lover, my own husband, all of it, 268 00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:57,400 Speaker 3: my own best friend. It's like, Jada, you are here 269 00:15:57,720 --> 00:16:06,000 Speaker 3: alone with you that I could gather the understanding and 270 00:16:06,080 --> 00:16:13,520 Speaker 3: the knowledge that I am my safety. So me being 271 00:16:13,600 --> 00:16:18,840 Speaker 3: my safety, I'm going to be okay when I want 272 00:16:18,880 --> 00:16:22,280 Speaker 3: to share my vulnerability and I want to share that 273 00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:27,000 Speaker 3: well of sweet honey within me with someone else. Because 274 00:16:27,040 --> 00:16:30,480 Speaker 3: no matter how they react, no matter what they say, 275 00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:33,960 Speaker 3: no matter how they misstep, I know, I got me. 276 00:16:34,520 --> 00:16:35,520 Speaker 3: It's going to be okay. 277 00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:39,040 Speaker 1: You're loving the little girl and you that wasn't loved. 278 00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:41,680 Speaker 3: Right, Loving that little girl in me that wasn't loved 279 00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:46,560 Speaker 3: and that little girl, loving her and strengthening her is 280 00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:50,240 Speaker 3: what creates that safe space within us to be able 281 00:16:50,360 --> 00:16:55,840 Speaker 3: to share those spaces of vulnerability with other people. 282 00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:57,760 Speaker 1: But we you know I. 283 00:16:59,360 --> 00:17:05,680 Speaker 3: It's not based on it's not based on somebody else 284 00:17:05,760 --> 00:17:08,320 Speaker 3: creating that safe space for us. Now, we do have 285 00:17:08,400 --> 00:17:14,000 Speaker 3: to have the We do have to have the the 286 00:17:14,119 --> 00:17:15,280 Speaker 3: understanding of. 287 00:17:15,359 --> 00:17:16,119 Speaker 1: Who does not. 288 00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:22,359 Speaker 3: Everybody deserves that that space. If you're speaking about a 289 00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:27,399 Speaker 3: man that you've decided to be with, you know that 290 00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:31,640 Speaker 3: you're committed to, That's that's where the work is, right. 291 00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:35,280 Speaker 3: I look at relationships as a holy path in that way. 292 00:17:35,359 --> 00:17:37,040 Speaker 1: That that that's really what. 293 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:43,040 Speaker 3: I feel as though that I'm learning on my journey. 294 00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:46,360 Speaker 3: I got married because I, you know, I was pregnant 295 00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:50,600 Speaker 3: and we wanted a family, but I also wanted I 296 00:17:50,640 --> 00:17:55,080 Speaker 3: wanted I didn't want to deal with my ship. I 297 00:17:55,160 --> 00:17:58,920 Speaker 3: expected that Will was going to be the savior, prince 298 00:18:00,720 --> 00:18:07,080 Speaker 3: right and once I realize that, oh no, a marriage 299 00:18:07,240 --> 00:18:13,359 Speaker 3: is about us having the fortitude to walk each other home, 300 00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:17,840 Speaker 3: walk each other to that sacred space without as well 301 00:18:17,920 --> 00:18:21,720 Speaker 3: as the sacred space within, and that's what the conflict 302 00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:27,199 Speaker 3: within our intimate relationships are supposed to do. We're running 303 00:18:27,280 --> 00:18:31,679 Speaker 3: into ourselves where we have to ask those questions of 304 00:18:33,119 --> 00:18:35,760 Speaker 3: what is the common donation, I'm the common denominator here, 305 00:18:35,880 --> 00:18:38,480 Speaker 3: what does that mean? And then really be able to 306 00:18:38,480 --> 00:18:40,880 Speaker 3: look at our partners and go, Okay, for some of us, 307 00:18:41,680 --> 00:18:44,280 Speaker 3: we didn't choose the right partners, and so it's time 308 00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:46,960 Speaker 3: to move on. For some of us, we chose the 309 00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:51,840 Speaker 3: perfect partner that is the perfect mirror that is consistently 310 00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:58,040 Speaker 3: going to help us get through our shit, cleaning it 311 00:18:58,119 --> 00:18:58,960 Speaker 3: up along the way. 312 00:19:12,080 --> 00:19:16,320 Speaker 2: The piece too, that obviously, with your book out will 313 00:19:17,080 --> 00:19:19,919 Speaker 2: when the stars it'll be out and the press talking 314 00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:23,399 Speaker 2: about how okay, you've been separated since twenty sixteen, and 315 00:19:23,440 --> 00:19:28,040 Speaker 2: that's kind of been the the storyline of certain pieces 316 00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:33,920 Speaker 2: of the book. And you know, I'm curious, it's listen, 317 00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:36,800 Speaker 2: it's not. It's not for us to and even though 318 00:19:36,840 --> 00:19:43,720 Speaker 2: I'm going to ask the question, but that's y'all's decision 319 00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:47,880 Speaker 2: to do what you want to do, right as someone 320 00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:51,439 Speaker 2: who I also that for me the in between and 321 00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:54,639 Speaker 2: I've is where my depression comes in at times. And 322 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:56,760 Speaker 2: so I'm curious, like in your in between because right now, 323 00:19:56,880 --> 00:19:58,560 Speaker 2: it's like I saw on the I think it was 324 00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:03,840 Speaker 2: another interview, you said, we are life partners and that's 325 00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:06,840 Speaker 2: a beautiful thing. Can you still have that and still 326 00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:11,359 Speaker 2: like do you want to find a way to be 327 00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:15,520 Speaker 2: the married couple again or is it something where do 328 00:20:15,560 --> 00:20:17,800 Speaker 2: you have hope for love in a different area while 329 00:20:17,840 --> 00:20:20,160 Speaker 2: still having a life partner yeah, or are you still 330 00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:22,119 Speaker 2: just trying to figure it out? Because I'm like, I 331 00:20:22,119 --> 00:20:23,879 Speaker 2: want you to have love and like you know, like 332 00:20:23,920 --> 00:20:27,240 Speaker 2: my very you know tail heart, I'm just like I 333 00:20:27,320 --> 00:20:31,359 Speaker 2: just want you to not feel that in between of like, well, 334 00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:35,359 Speaker 2: yes we're not going to get divorced, but also that's fine, 335 00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:37,920 Speaker 2: but you can also experience an amazing love too. 336 00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:39,520 Speaker 1: I don't know, does that make sense? 337 00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:43,600 Speaker 3: It does make sense, and right now, you know I 338 00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:50,160 Speaker 3: talk about it in the book, but the situation at 339 00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:55,040 Speaker 3: the oscars definitely brought us closer in a different way, 340 00:20:55,760 --> 00:21:01,560 Speaker 3: right and right now, just we're still figuring it out 341 00:21:01,680 --> 00:21:05,959 Speaker 3: because there's such deep love between us, and we've just 342 00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:11,520 Speaker 3: been going through such like the Oscar situation forced us 343 00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:16,440 Speaker 3: to have to go into even a deeper healing process 344 00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:19,760 Speaker 3: than ever before, right even though it was starting before 345 00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:23,440 Speaker 3: the oscars, but after the oscars, it's when it was like, okay, 346 00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:28,000 Speaker 3: this is all on the table, right And so right 347 00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:32,280 Speaker 3: now we've just really been enjoying like healing together and 348 00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:37,440 Speaker 3: really figuring out how we want to how we want 349 00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:42,040 Speaker 3: to do this right now. We don't want to be divorced, 350 00:21:42,160 --> 00:21:49,280 Speaker 3: and we are really moving closer together. And so I 351 00:21:49,320 --> 00:21:52,080 Speaker 3: wish I could say that I knew exactly what the 352 00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:55,040 Speaker 3: landing place was going to be, but I just don't 353 00:21:55,040 --> 00:21:57,480 Speaker 3: know yet. We're still working at it. 354 00:21:57,520 --> 00:21:58,080 Speaker 1: And that's okay. 355 00:21:58,119 --> 00:22:02,240 Speaker 2: But I think there's something beautiful about a new relationship. 356 00:22:02,240 --> 00:22:04,280 Speaker 2: And that's something that obviously mine and my ex we 357 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:06,160 Speaker 2: couldn't figure out because there was I think so much 358 00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:10,199 Speaker 2: resentment and on all sides. But I think there is 359 00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:13,400 Speaker 2: beauty in that new relationship. And obviously you stood by 360 00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:15,840 Speaker 2: his side during that time when you were sitting there 361 00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:17,840 Speaker 2: not with him, and no one knew that, so you 362 00:22:17,840 --> 00:22:19,680 Speaker 2: were sitting there as a supportive wife. And then you're 363 00:22:19,720 --> 00:22:22,320 Speaker 2: getting the comments and the hate and I you know, 364 00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,240 Speaker 2: you obviously talked about in the book about the eye 365 00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:27,600 Speaker 2: roll and all the things that people made up. And 366 00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:31,560 Speaker 2: I can't even imagine I have like the point zero 367 00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:35,320 Speaker 2: zero one percent of the haters. And for you, it's 368 00:22:35,359 --> 00:22:38,639 Speaker 2: like having people and you even talk about this like 369 00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:40,320 Speaker 2: of course they're going to blame the woman. It's the 370 00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:43,120 Speaker 2: woman's fault that he went up and did that, and 371 00:22:43,520 --> 00:22:45,600 Speaker 2: or it's you know, the iyrol, all all those things, 372 00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:47,800 Speaker 2: and it's like, I hated that you even had to 373 00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:50,840 Speaker 2: It's not that you defended yourself you talked about it, 374 00:22:51,320 --> 00:22:53,520 Speaker 2: but that you it was even something that had to 375 00:22:53,520 --> 00:22:57,359 Speaker 2: be spoken about because no one knows the crap that 376 00:22:57,400 --> 00:22:59,320 Speaker 2: you have to deal with from all the public and 377 00:22:59,359 --> 00:23:02,840 Speaker 2: all the opinions. So was there a piece of you 378 00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:06,480 Speaker 2: that was like, I'm going to share my story because 379 00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:08,800 Speaker 2: I want to, or because you just didn't want the 380 00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:11,720 Speaker 2: narrative being told for you. 381 00:23:13,920 --> 00:23:16,760 Speaker 3: I thought it was just a worthy story to share, right, 382 00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:24,679 Speaker 3: because it was what my journey has been in regards 383 00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:28,159 Speaker 3: to like coming from this space of lack of self 384 00:23:28,200 --> 00:23:33,320 Speaker 3: worth to feeling so worthy that I could sit in 385 00:23:33,359 --> 00:23:38,840 Speaker 3: that fire in that way and be okay, Right, and 386 00:23:38,920 --> 00:23:45,040 Speaker 3: so to me it was almost like a culmination of like, 387 00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:48,840 Speaker 3: all right, just when you think okay, Jata, you feel worthy, 388 00:23:49,119 --> 00:23:51,439 Speaker 3: you're about to get really tested right now, right? And 389 00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:55,239 Speaker 3: I think for all of us our journeys might not 390 00:23:55,280 --> 00:23:59,840 Speaker 3: be that extreme, but those moments where we've done a 391 00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:03,000 Speaker 3: certain amount of work and then we've landed and gone, 392 00:24:03,280 --> 00:24:06,520 Speaker 3: oh man, I'm in a totally different place than I 393 00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:10,680 Speaker 3: was five years ago. Right, we have these these points. 394 00:24:10,720 --> 00:24:15,639 Speaker 3: So for me it was so important to share my 395 00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:19,520 Speaker 3: worthy journey because I feel like that is the journey 396 00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:22,879 Speaker 3: for all of us, trying to find that level of 397 00:24:22,920 --> 00:24:26,600 Speaker 3: self worth where we can just be okay, we can 398 00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:32,280 Speaker 3: feel okay no matter what is happening, because life is 399 00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:35,000 Speaker 3: going to do what it's going to do. Life is 400 00:24:35,119 --> 00:24:41,280 Speaker 3: never gonna always present itself as pleasurable, blissful, enjoyable. We're 401 00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:45,480 Speaker 3: gonna have our painful moments, right, So who are we 402 00:24:46,160 --> 00:24:51,679 Speaker 3: when shit gets real? Who are we when shit gets tough? Right? 403 00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:55,439 Speaker 2: And how do you not let those voices affect you 404 00:24:55,960 --> 00:24:59,440 Speaker 2: with the people that have no idea? Because I say 405 00:24:59,520 --> 00:25:01,960 Speaker 2: it doesn't fact me, but it still hurts. It's hard. 406 00:25:02,280 --> 00:25:02,800 Speaker 1: I want to. 407 00:25:02,760 --> 00:25:06,160 Speaker 2: Defend Yeah, but how do you not let that depress you, 408 00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:09,879 Speaker 2: coming from you know, the line of depression that you 409 00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:11,800 Speaker 2: have had in the past, Like what do you do 410 00:25:11,880 --> 00:25:14,200 Speaker 2: to steer your path the right way? 411 00:25:14,560 --> 00:25:18,120 Speaker 3: That's that's when you're really sitting in that worthy pocket 412 00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:23,600 Speaker 3: with everything that I've been through, Right, it's like developing, 413 00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:29,800 Speaker 3: having dismantled all those false beliefs about myself and built 414 00:25:29,880 --> 00:25:34,440 Speaker 3: a new foundation of what is true, right, and being 415 00:25:34,480 --> 00:25:38,040 Speaker 3: able to sit with that and once again not looking 416 00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:44,120 Speaker 3: for validation right from an outside source. This is once 417 00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:48,080 Speaker 3: again just doing that work that builds that sense of 418 00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:57,960 Speaker 3: self within that inner kingdom, right, and really knowing for 419 00:25:58,080 --> 00:26:02,960 Speaker 3: a fact who I am without needing any kind of 420 00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:08,760 Speaker 3: validation from anyone else. And that's really about curing self judgment. 421 00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:15,359 Speaker 3: Nobody's judgment can affect you. When you have really dealt 422 00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:19,919 Speaker 3: with your self judgment. It's like somebody's like, she's a bitch. 423 00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:25,840 Speaker 3: It's like, I'll give you that sometimes. 424 00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:31,360 Speaker 1: Oh sis this morning, actually right, It's but then. 425 00:26:31,320 --> 00:26:34,640 Speaker 3: Also knowing I'm so much more than that, and that's 426 00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:38,040 Speaker 3: not who I am. I might have a moment of bitchiness, 427 00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:39,200 Speaker 3: but that's not who I am. 428 00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:39,840 Speaker 1: Right. 429 00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:44,200 Speaker 3: So it's like when you know you and you've cured 430 00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:47,679 Speaker 3: your own self judgment. Other people's judgment can't be a weapon. 431 00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:50,879 Speaker 3: So what I've had to do, and I talk about 432 00:26:50,880 --> 00:26:53,280 Speaker 3: this in the book, I mean really that journey of 433 00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:57,359 Speaker 3: self judgment started on my metal music journey because I 434 00:26:57,400 --> 00:27:02,120 Speaker 3: went out there and it was so much hate. I mean, 435 00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:08,879 Speaker 3: my god, I'm talking about physical The boards on the 436 00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:12,680 Speaker 3: eyes Fest joints were just, you know, full of the 437 00:27:12,720 --> 00:27:22,399 Speaker 3: most brutal, hateful, vile threats, right And going out on 438 00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:26,439 Speaker 3: stage every day and recognizing that and I'm not going 439 00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:29,080 Speaker 3: to say that there weren't real threats out there, but 440 00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:32,840 Speaker 3: most of them were not, and really getting to see 441 00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:37,200 Speaker 3: that people's judgment, anything anybody has to say about you 442 00:27:37,440 --> 00:27:42,960 Speaker 3: is a reflection, a projection of what's going on with them. 443 00:27:43,040 --> 00:27:45,280 Speaker 3: And that's when that journey really started. And that's when 444 00:27:45,280 --> 00:27:47,679 Speaker 3: I had to really start thinking about why does this 445 00:27:47,760 --> 00:27:51,600 Speaker 3: bother you? Why are you so disrupted? And I was like, Oh, 446 00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:54,080 Speaker 3: this is about do you believe what these people are 447 00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:58,640 Speaker 3: saying about you? Do you believe you don't deserve here, deserve. 448 00:27:58,359 --> 00:27:58,880 Speaker 1: To be here? 449 00:27:59,640 --> 00:27:59,840 Speaker 2: Oh? 450 00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:03,040 Speaker 3: So that's the thing to look at, not what they're saying, 451 00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:08,560 Speaker 3: but how you feel about what they're saying how you 452 00:28:08,840 --> 00:28:12,640 Speaker 3: believe what they're saying, and. 453 00:28:12,600 --> 00:28:14,280 Speaker 1: They can't strike a nerve. You can't be on the 454 00:28:14,320 --> 00:28:17,959 Speaker 1: defense or live an offense, right, you know what you know, 455 00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:19,480 Speaker 1: what you know, what you know to be true. 456 00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:20,800 Speaker 3: There you go. 457 00:28:21,240 --> 00:28:23,840 Speaker 2: I think my piece though, is I still have shame 458 00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:27,280 Speaker 2: around some of my past or that I want to 459 00:28:27,320 --> 00:28:30,439 Speaker 2: be like, No, but I've changed and I'm not that person, 460 00:28:30,800 --> 00:28:33,159 Speaker 2: you know. Where that's the piece where I'm like, I 461 00:28:33,200 --> 00:28:36,000 Speaker 2: have to just go rest in the what I know 462 00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:40,840 Speaker 2: to be the truth today versus the past that's right. 463 00:28:40,840 --> 00:28:42,840 Speaker 3: And just making peace with the past, because I'm with 464 00:28:42,880 --> 00:28:45,360 Speaker 3: you on that, like on my journey. And I think 465 00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:47,480 Speaker 3: as women, I think another reason why this was so 466 00:28:47,520 --> 00:28:49,640 Speaker 3: important for me to write this book is because I 467 00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:54,720 Speaker 3: don't believe that women often that we feel safe enough 468 00:28:55,120 --> 00:29:00,360 Speaker 3: to talk about our real journeys, like the depth of it, 469 00:29:00,400 --> 00:29:06,000 Speaker 3: because we feel like we're going to be ridiculed, we're 470 00:29:06,040 --> 00:29:08,720 Speaker 3: going to be exiled, we're going to be looked upon 471 00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:12,360 Speaker 3: as the bad woman. Right. And so I had been 472 00:29:12,400 --> 00:29:18,120 Speaker 3: through Listen, I don't know any other words that people 473 00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:19,760 Speaker 3: could call me, you know what I mean. It's like 474 00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:23,440 Speaker 3: I've been through the gauntlet. So I felt like, YO, 475 00:29:24,920 --> 00:29:29,040 Speaker 3: just offer your journey in a way that other women 476 00:29:29,120 --> 00:29:32,480 Speaker 3: who are going through this can be seen. Offer your 477 00:29:32,560 --> 00:29:35,640 Speaker 3: journey in a way that men who have women in 478 00:29:35,680 --> 00:29:38,680 Speaker 3: their lives that they love can you can help them 479 00:29:38,880 --> 00:29:42,240 Speaker 3: see those women you know, or the women that love 480 00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:46,400 Speaker 3: those women, you know whatever. So for me, I just 481 00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:50,280 Speaker 3: felt like, I know, when I was going through my 482 00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:56,400 Speaker 3: journey and I got stuck, I so needed something that 483 00:29:57,040 --> 00:30:01,360 Speaker 3: looked like reflected what I was going through, you know, 484 00:30:01,600 --> 00:30:03,880 Speaker 3: just like little breadcrumbs, a bit of oxygen. And I 485 00:30:03,920 --> 00:30:06,600 Speaker 3: was like, I want to offer that. I want to 486 00:30:06,600 --> 00:30:08,560 Speaker 3: offer that. I want to offer those bread crumbs. I 487 00:30:08,600 --> 00:30:13,080 Speaker 3: want to offer you know, that oxygen for someone who 488 00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:19,960 Speaker 3: is stuck somewhere feeling hopeless. 489 00:30:28,640 --> 00:30:31,240 Speaker 2: Was there a chapter in the book where I don't 490 00:30:31,240 --> 00:30:33,440 Speaker 2: know if you experienced this, like where I remember when 491 00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:37,400 Speaker 2: I was writing, I I could write, but when I 492 00:30:37,440 --> 00:30:40,600 Speaker 2: came to the audio recording of the book, there was 493 00:30:40,640 --> 00:30:43,520 Speaker 2: a chapter where I really struggled getting through a chapter 494 00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:46,680 Speaker 2: and I kept crying and I had to stop. And 495 00:30:46,760 --> 00:30:49,360 Speaker 2: I'm curious if there was a story or a chapter 496 00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:51,840 Speaker 2: that you really struggled with. 497 00:30:52,880 --> 00:30:54,320 Speaker 3: M Yeah, there were. 498 00:30:54,400 --> 00:30:56,120 Speaker 1: There There was some heavy stuff in that book. 499 00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:57,920 Speaker 2: I'm reading, I'm just like, you know, when you talk 500 00:30:57,960 --> 00:30:59,960 Speaker 2: about the iahuasc when you talked about finding the cliff, 501 00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:00,960 Speaker 2: I'm just like, wow. 502 00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:05,920 Speaker 1: My grandmother, like my grandmother, that was one. 503 00:31:06,280 --> 00:31:07,880 Speaker 3: That was one my grandmother. 504 00:31:08,080 --> 00:31:13,560 Speaker 1: Like I cried reading that, like that is you, sister? 505 00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:17,320 Speaker 1: Those were the breadcrumbs. Yeah, like the moments where I 506 00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:19,600 Speaker 1: was like, now, this is some Jada I can get 507 00:31:19,640 --> 00:31:22,040 Speaker 1: down with, Like this is the Jada I've been trying 508 00:31:22,040 --> 00:31:23,560 Speaker 1: to get to understand. 509 00:31:23,280 --> 00:31:26,440 Speaker 3: Right, right right, which is why I you know, I 510 00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:29,880 Speaker 3: felt like that part of my story was so important. 511 00:31:29,920 --> 00:31:32,080 Speaker 3: I felt like, I'm so glad you said that because 512 00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:35,040 Speaker 3: I felt like, oh my goodness, if people don't know this, 513 00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:39,600 Speaker 3: you'll never really get to, you know, the inside of me. Right. 514 00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:45,240 Speaker 3: But definitely reading the parts about my grandmother and then there, 515 00:31:45,360 --> 00:31:47,440 Speaker 3: you know, there was some pop. There was some parts 516 00:31:47,480 --> 00:31:49,800 Speaker 3: about Pop that would just I thought that I had, 517 00:31:50,760 --> 00:31:56,280 Speaker 3: you know, resolved a lot of issues around that as 518 00:31:56,280 --> 00:31:59,440 Speaker 3: far as the loss of him, and you know that 519 00:31:59,440 --> 00:32:01,440 Speaker 3: the story when I went to Wrikers and had to 520 00:32:01,520 --> 00:32:07,000 Speaker 3: leave him there, that was hard. So it was you know, 521 00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:09,520 Speaker 3: it was pieces, it was pieces like that that were 522 00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:10,720 Speaker 3: really difficult. 523 00:32:11,040 --> 00:32:15,120 Speaker 1: When you closed the book and you and you decided 524 00:32:15,200 --> 00:32:20,320 Speaker 1: worthy is done the book itself. What's the main feeling 525 00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:23,560 Speaker 1: that came over you as like a woman and author 526 00:32:23,640 --> 00:32:26,120 Speaker 1: a daughter? Mama. 527 00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:32,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, I was just I was just so happy. I 528 00:32:32,640 --> 00:32:35,360 Speaker 3: was happy that I accomplished it because it was so 529 00:32:35,440 --> 00:32:37,520 Speaker 3: many times when I just wanted to quit. I was 530 00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:40,640 Speaker 3: just like, I don't want it, I'm done, you know it. 531 00:32:40,760 --> 00:32:43,240 Speaker 1: Just why it was the noise? 532 00:32:43,360 --> 00:32:46,600 Speaker 2: Was it just the challenge of the book writing process, 533 00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:49,080 Speaker 2: the emotions. 534 00:32:48,680 --> 00:32:52,200 Speaker 3: That, Yeah, it was. It was a really challenging process 535 00:32:52,320 --> 00:32:57,480 Speaker 3: because you know, I'm not writing about the entirety of 536 00:32:57,520 --> 00:33:02,320 Speaker 3: my life, right, I decided to specifically walk the eggs 537 00:33:02,360 --> 00:33:06,800 Speaker 3: out lands, specifically walk the shadow lands of my experience, 538 00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:11,600 Speaker 3: so every excuse you feel me. So I was in 539 00:33:11,640 --> 00:33:14,960 Speaker 3: the valley of the shadow of death the entire time. 540 00:33:17,640 --> 00:33:22,400 Speaker 1: It's heavy, it's heavy, right, It's real though, it is 541 00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:24,800 Speaker 1: like palpable, like you can feel it. 542 00:33:25,400 --> 00:33:28,000 Speaker 3: Right, And that was the thing, because I had to 543 00:33:28,080 --> 00:33:30,560 Speaker 3: go back and relive it all. 544 00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:33,720 Speaker 1: You know what, But you did it so beautifully. I mean, 545 00:33:33,760 --> 00:33:34,720 Speaker 1: you really did. 546 00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:36,320 Speaker 3: I appreciate that. 547 00:33:36,600 --> 00:33:38,960 Speaker 1: I really, I mean, it just makes a person who 548 00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:42,960 Speaker 1: I mean, I have to just be completely honest with you. 549 00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:46,080 Speaker 1: I had no idea what to expect from you, Jada 550 00:33:46,160 --> 00:33:49,920 Speaker 1: the Woman today, Right, I think that's what this book does. 551 00:33:50,160 --> 00:33:52,880 Speaker 1: I think that's what being able to sit I mean, listen, 552 00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:55,400 Speaker 1: did I ever think that Kristen from the middle of nowhere, 553 00:33:55,480 --> 00:33:57,120 Speaker 1: Michigan was ever going to get to sit with Jada 554 00:33:57,120 --> 00:34:00,400 Speaker 1: Pinkettsmith and ask questions like woman to woman? Ever? Did 555 00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:03,280 Speaker 1: I think? Did I ever think this was going to 556 00:34:03,320 --> 00:34:05,600 Speaker 1: be my best friend? You know, and we do worll 557 00:34:05,680 --> 00:34:08,399 Speaker 1: deep because we will cut for each other. But like, 558 00:34:08,760 --> 00:34:11,239 Speaker 1: it's crazy for me to be able to like sit 559 00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:14,600 Speaker 1: with you. You're so disarming. I think that's one thing 560 00:34:14,640 --> 00:34:17,080 Speaker 1: I do want people to understand when they listen to this, 561 00:34:17,239 --> 00:34:20,520 Speaker 1: because I will be honest with you. The perception that 562 00:34:20,600 --> 00:34:26,120 Speaker 1: media has given me of you is wildly unfair. Yeah, 563 00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:29,040 Speaker 1: your strength. They love to edit to make your strength 564 00:34:29,080 --> 00:34:31,600 Speaker 1: feel like you are just like hard. 565 00:34:31,920 --> 00:34:33,760 Speaker 3: Yeah that I'm steel. 566 00:34:34,840 --> 00:34:38,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, And some of that is true and good, but 567 00:34:38,440 --> 00:34:42,480 Speaker 1: a lot of that is wrapped in this like really 568 00:34:42,520 --> 00:34:47,960 Speaker 1: beautiful woman who just is being really super honest. Thank you, 569 00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:50,280 Speaker 1: And we all needed a minute. I mean I needed 570 00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:51,960 Speaker 1: to know that about you, right. 571 00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:55,800 Speaker 3: I appreciate that, and you know from woman to woman. 572 00:34:55,880 --> 00:34:57,960 Speaker 3: I just think that that's why I feel it's so 573 00:34:58,040 --> 00:35:02,200 Speaker 3: important that we share our stories so that we can 574 00:35:02,280 --> 00:35:05,719 Speaker 3: we can understand the nuances, so that when we see somebody, 575 00:35:05,760 --> 00:35:09,439 Speaker 3: like when I see a strong woman and I'm like, oh, oh, 576 00:35:09,520 --> 00:35:12,680 Speaker 3: she's got a difference, it's like I know how to like, 577 00:35:12,760 --> 00:35:14,799 Speaker 3: all right, let me just like, let me, let me 578 00:35:14,840 --> 00:35:16,680 Speaker 3: dip over here for a minute and see if I 579 00:35:16,680 --> 00:35:19,400 Speaker 3: can get around this corner and get around the next corner. 580 00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:22,200 Speaker 3: You know what I mean. It's like because there's certain 581 00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:25,719 Speaker 3: walls that I understand because I've had them too, you know, 582 00:35:25,800 --> 00:35:28,640 Speaker 3: but I can look and see there's more there, you know. 583 00:35:28,719 --> 00:35:32,000 Speaker 3: So as women, as we as we share more of 584 00:35:32,040 --> 00:35:35,839 Speaker 3: our stories and we understand these different nuances of one 585 00:35:35,880 --> 00:35:39,439 Speaker 3: another and just help each other, just help bring each 586 00:35:39,440 --> 00:35:42,240 Speaker 3: other out, you know, create safe space like you guys 587 00:35:42,239 --> 00:35:45,400 Speaker 3: are creating today for me, you know, so that we 588 00:35:45,440 --> 00:35:47,520 Speaker 3: can just have real talk, because at the end of 589 00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:50,160 Speaker 3: the day, that's what we don't have enough of, you know, 590 00:35:50,200 --> 00:35:53,600 Speaker 3: I have enough real talk amongst us, you know, so 591 00:35:53,640 --> 00:35:57,400 Speaker 3: that we can really understand the heroine's journey, our journey 592 00:35:57,440 --> 00:36:01,080 Speaker 3: from a feminine perspective. And when I talk about feminine. 593 00:36:01,400 --> 00:36:05,080 Speaker 3: I'm not necessarily talking about gender. I'm talking about energetically 594 00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:09,759 Speaker 3: as well, because we have men that that you know, 595 00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:15,360 Speaker 3: on their journey, their heroine's journey, when they've accomplished everything 596 00:36:15,360 --> 00:36:18,600 Speaker 3: they've accomplished in the world and now the only place 597 00:36:18,680 --> 00:36:22,640 Speaker 3: to go is the inner world of feelings. 598 00:36:23,239 --> 00:36:24,880 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, and you even said too in your book, 599 00:36:24,960 --> 00:36:26,680 Speaker 2: like I'm going to be there by a side, but 600 00:36:26,719 --> 00:36:28,440 Speaker 2: he also has to figure it out. And I love 601 00:36:28,560 --> 00:36:31,919 Speaker 2: that too, because I can't. You can't make anyone happy. 602 00:36:31,920 --> 00:36:34,439 Speaker 2: And I learned that lesson you know, for me too, 603 00:36:34,600 --> 00:36:36,719 Speaker 2: like he can't make I can't make him happy, Like 604 00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:40,080 Speaker 2: I'll be a I will stand by you, but I 605 00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:42,160 Speaker 2: can't do it for you, and you have to do it. 606 00:36:42,520 --> 00:36:43,279 Speaker 1: You have to do it. 607 00:36:43,320 --> 00:36:45,279 Speaker 2: And that's something too that I was like, Wow, I 608 00:36:45,320 --> 00:36:47,600 Speaker 2: was like truth when I hate, and you know, I'm like, 609 00:36:47,680 --> 00:36:51,080 Speaker 2: that's all of that is so true. And you know, 610 00:36:51,280 --> 00:36:54,040 Speaker 2: to kind of wrap up first of all, I love 611 00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:55,719 Speaker 2: that you put in all the amazing quotes in the 612 00:36:55,719 --> 00:37:00,440 Speaker 2: book too, and the meditations and in the poems. Yeah, 613 00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:02,959 Speaker 2: I mean so beautifully. While done, I just I cannot 614 00:37:03,000 --> 00:37:06,400 Speaker 2: wait for everyone to read this And what what do 615 00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:09,960 Speaker 2: you want the biggest takeaway to be for people that 616 00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:10,800 Speaker 2: pick up this book. 617 00:37:12,320 --> 00:37:16,120 Speaker 3: You know, honestly, I'm just hoping that the biggest takeaway 618 00:37:16,280 --> 00:37:18,480 Speaker 3: is just like what you guys shared with me today 619 00:37:18,600 --> 00:37:22,160 Speaker 3: is that you were like, there's so much in here 620 00:37:22,520 --> 00:37:25,239 Speaker 3: that I could relate to. There was so much in 621 00:37:25,280 --> 00:37:29,560 Speaker 3: here that gave me, you know, oxygen. You know. It's 622 00:37:29,640 --> 00:37:34,160 Speaker 3: like that to me was the reason that I wrote 623 00:37:34,160 --> 00:37:37,720 Speaker 3: this book because I feel like our journeys to self 624 00:37:37,719 --> 00:37:43,240 Speaker 3: worth are pretty universal, and you know, and and it's 625 00:37:43,280 --> 00:37:51,239 Speaker 3: it's it's it's not always expressed what it takes to 626 00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:56,120 Speaker 3: feel whole as a woman, you know, and so and 627 00:37:56,200 --> 00:38:00,279 Speaker 3: it because it's a it's a it's not a for 628 00:38:00,360 --> 00:38:02,120 Speaker 3: the faint at heart, you know. 629 00:38:02,400 --> 00:38:06,160 Speaker 2: And it's also something too. I want to say, it's 630 00:38:06,160 --> 00:38:09,520 Speaker 2: okay to not tell the whole truth of things when 631 00:38:09,600 --> 00:38:11,319 Speaker 2: you're still trying to figure things out. 632 00:38:11,640 --> 00:38:12,720 Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, because. 633 00:38:12,560 --> 00:38:15,600 Speaker 2: Some people it's like, yeah, so you talked about the 634 00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:18,440 Speaker 2: entanglements on Red Table Talk. You didn't say like, there's pieces, 635 00:38:18,480 --> 00:38:21,440 Speaker 2: but that's okay, Like not everybody gets to like you 636 00:38:21,520 --> 00:38:24,640 Speaker 2: are being open and willing to be authentic and share 637 00:38:24,680 --> 00:38:28,279 Speaker 2: your story, but there are also pieces that people think 638 00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:29,600 Speaker 2: they just get to take it all. 639 00:38:29,680 --> 00:38:30,160 Speaker 1: You don't. 640 00:38:30,520 --> 00:38:32,799 Speaker 3: You don't and that's the truth, and you get to 641 00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:37,240 Speaker 3: control that absolutely, and you know, you know, just getting 642 00:38:37,239 --> 00:38:42,520 Speaker 3: people to understand that, you know, my relationship with Will 643 00:38:42,600 --> 00:38:44,920 Speaker 3: is what it is. It's not going to look like 644 00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:47,560 Speaker 3: you know, it's probably not going to look like the 645 00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:51,160 Speaker 3: way everybody wants it to look like most likely, you know, 646 00:38:51,600 --> 00:38:55,319 Speaker 3: and people just gott to be with that because we're 647 00:38:55,440 --> 00:38:56,560 Speaker 3: that's okay. Yeah. 648 00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:59,000 Speaker 2: As long as you know that you are worthy of 649 00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:01,400 Speaker 2: love and you feel loved and you feel safe, like 650 00:39:01,440 --> 00:39:04,200 Speaker 2: that is my biggest wish and prayer for you, that 651 00:39:04,280 --> 00:39:06,520 Speaker 2: you can just like you know that in your soul 652 00:39:06,600 --> 00:39:10,600 Speaker 2: that you're worthy of the greatest love, not just relationally 653 00:39:10,719 --> 00:39:12,359 Speaker 2: but just in life, and you have that with your 654 00:39:12,440 --> 00:39:14,879 Speaker 2: kids and you have it's not just a man too, 655 00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:17,400 Speaker 2: which is I always equated it to a man, Yeah, 656 00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:21,040 Speaker 2: but like there's so much other forms of love. And 657 00:39:21,120 --> 00:39:23,560 Speaker 2: as long as you feel worthy and people that read 658 00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:26,120 Speaker 2: this book know that they deserve worth, that is when 659 00:39:26,160 --> 00:39:28,680 Speaker 2: your life starts to change and you don't have to 660 00:39:30,960 --> 00:39:32,719 Speaker 2: feel the heaviness of it all. 661 00:39:33,000 --> 00:39:35,680 Speaker 1: I do also love that you and Will are still married, 662 00:39:35,960 --> 00:39:38,120 Speaker 1: Like I just need a minute with that, because that's 663 00:39:38,200 --> 00:39:42,399 Speaker 1: not common either. I mean, sis, it's like divorce core 664 00:39:42,640 --> 00:39:44,759 Speaker 1: all over the place. I mean, and I'm on my 665 00:39:44,800 --> 00:39:49,080 Speaker 1: second husband, so but I'm just you know, like I'm 666 00:39:49,120 --> 00:39:51,600 Speaker 1: in a relationship. And my husband is an artist, right, 667 00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:54,359 Speaker 1: so that comes with its own thing, and he has 668 00:39:54,400 --> 00:39:56,560 Speaker 1: his own thing, and he is a sweet leo. But 669 00:39:56,600 --> 00:39:59,719 Speaker 1: he loves himself some attention and some validation and he's 670 00:39:59,800 --> 00:40:02,600 Speaker 1: up shaking it and getting it, you know. And I 671 00:40:02,719 --> 00:40:05,920 Speaker 1: love that too. But we are in over the last 672 00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:10,040 Speaker 1: probably thirteen fourteen months, a real reinvention of who we 673 00:40:10,080 --> 00:40:12,600 Speaker 1: are as a married couple too. And we've been together 674 00:40:12,719 --> 00:40:17,040 Speaker 1: nine years, and I is there points in our marriage 675 00:40:17,040 --> 00:40:20,600 Speaker 1: where people would go, why wouldn't y'all, why would y'all 676 00:40:20,640 --> 00:40:21,320 Speaker 1: even be together? 677 00:40:21,680 --> 00:40:21,879 Speaker 2: Right? 678 00:40:22,120 --> 00:40:22,360 Speaker 1: You know? 679 00:40:22,960 --> 00:40:23,200 Speaker 3: Yeah? 680 00:40:23,320 --> 00:40:26,680 Speaker 1: And I just appreciate that you can be real that 681 00:40:26,719 --> 00:40:29,239 Speaker 1: marriage is not easy. Is not the fairy tale. I mean, 682 00:40:29,280 --> 00:40:32,200 Speaker 1: I we just celebrated an anniversary. I said something similar 683 00:40:32,239 --> 00:40:34,080 Speaker 1: on Instagram because people always like, oh, I should had 684 00:40:34,120 --> 00:40:35,840 Speaker 1: a couple goals, and I'm like, no, y'all just see 685 00:40:35,840 --> 00:40:37,880 Speaker 1: what I share because I'm trying to keep it positive. 686 00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:41,160 Speaker 1: But I also was just like, this is not the movies. 687 00:40:41,320 --> 00:40:43,120 Speaker 1: This is the kind of love you sit down with 688 00:40:43,160 --> 00:40:46,840 Speaker 1: your grandkids and say, shit is real and we still tried. 689 00:40:47,239 --> 00:40:48,560 Speaker 3: That's right, that's right. 690 00:40:48,600 --> 00:40:51,560 Speaker 1: And I really love that about you too, even not 691 00:40:51,760 --> 00:40:54,520 Speaker 1: knowing anything about you too. I just love that you're 692 00:40:54,600 --> 00:40:58,080 Speaker 1: like we are still We're close, and we're fighting for 693 00:40:58,120 --> 00:40:58,560 Speaker 1: each other. 694 00:40:58,920 --> 00:41:02,120 Speaker 3: We are just trying to figure it out, you know. 695 00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:05,640 Speaker 3: And it's like what we have tried everything to get 696 00:41:05,640 --> 00:41:07,920 Speaker 3: away from each other, right. 697 00:41:09,719 --> 00:41:11,279 Speaker 1: And I feel that too, but. 698 00:41:12,800 --> 00:41:16,719 Speaker 3: It's so but you know, we just have so much 699 00:41:16,760 --> 00:41:17,880 Speaker 3: love for each other. 700 00:41:17,920 --> 00:41:20,000 Speaker 1: And we respect too. 701 00:41:20,320 --> 00:41:23,440 Speaker 3: Yeah, and all of that, like that is the reinvention. 702 00:41:24,280 --> 00:41:28,400 Speaker 3: When you talk about reinventing, like Will and Iron such 703 00:41:28,480 --> 00:41:31,280 Speaker 3: a different, beautiful phase. 704 00:41:32,200 --> 00:41:33,960 Speaker 1: And how long of you and Will been together? 705 00:41:35,000 --> 00:41:38,920 Speaker 3: Okay, so always funny, it's about twenty eight twenty twenty 706 00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:42,000 Speaker 3: eight years, twenty nine years, yep. 707 00:41:42,239 --> 00:41:44,600 Speaker 1: I mean, if you're not reinventing, then at some point 708 00:41:44,640 --> 00:41:48,520 Speaker 1: you're just chilling, right, what are we what are we doing? 709 00:41:48,960 --> 00:41:53,760 Speaker 3: Right? And so you know, we're both transforming so much 710 00:41:54,239 --> 00:41:58,880 Speaker 3: and just being able to have each other in this 711 00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:02,480 Speaker 3: in that process and being willing to be there for 712 00:42:02,600 --> 00:42:03,160 Speaker 3: one another. 713 00:42:04,080 --> 00:42:05,879 Speaker 1: You know, it's like a beautiful thing. 714 00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:07,279 Speaker 3: That's that's my road dog. 715 00:42:07,360 --> 00:42:10,759 Speaker 1: It's yeah. I love that he's our road dog too. 716 00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:16,799 Speaker 2: Jada Jada so much. I just I love you and 717 00:42:17,000 --> 00:42:19,839 Speaker 2: again you are anytime you're in Nashville. Please like, let me. 718 00:42:19,840 --> 00:42:24,440 Speaker 1: Just let me just hug you once, Jada, let met 719 00:42:24,520 --> 00:42:26,359 Speaker 1: you too long, girl, Just let me get in here. 720 00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:29,160 Speaker 1: I needed you today. You are a really beautiful human. 721 00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:33,839 Speaker 2: We'll do some red wine and just kicky yes please, okay, 722 00:42:34,080 --> 00:42:35,239 Speaker 2: all right, Well, thank you so much. 723 00:42:35,280 --> 00:42:36,120 Speaker 1: FUND appreciate you. 724 00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:42,799 Speaker 3: Thank you guys. Oh, Jada Jada, I feel so like 725 00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:44,000 Speaker 3: relieved or something. 726 00:42:44,080 --> 00:42:46,600 Speaker 1: Is that a weird feeling to have. It's not because 727 00:42:46,640 --> 00:42:50,279 Speaker 1: I was nervous. It's more so because it's like I 728 00:42:50,320 --> 00:42:53,960 Speaker 1: think I was a Will Smith fan first. Yeah, are 729 00:42:54,000 --> 00:42:56,000 Speaker 1: we all? I knew him first. I don't know. I 730 00:42:56,120 --> 00:42:58,640 Speaker 1: just fresh prince forever, you know. And so I feel 731 00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:01,640 Speaker 1: like any discourd or anything you see, you're just kind 732 00:43:01,640 --> 00:43:05,240 Speaker 1: of like m you know, and like he's growing right 733 00:43:05,560 --> 00:43:08,160 Speaker 1: also growing up thirty years in the public eye or plus. 734 00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:11,200 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's interesting too in the book how she said 735 00:43:11,480 --> 00:43:14,239 Speaker 2: that she thought the whole slap thing was a skit too. 736 00:43:15,160 --> 00:43:17,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, because he had kind of heard around the world 737 00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:21,480 Speaker 1: I know. And that's and then everybody had an opinion 738 00:43:21,520 --> 00:43:21,960 Speaker 1: about it. 739 00:43:22,920 --> 00:43:25,880 Speaker 2: I know how they spun the whole in which she 740 00:43:26,080 --> 00:43:28,120 Speaker 2: again she talked about she's like a right, let's talk 741 00:43:28,120 --> 00:43:28,680 Speaker 2: about the eye roll. 742 00:43:28,719 --> 00:43:29,839 Speaker 1: Let's talk about this in the book. 743 00:43:29,880 --> 00:43:34,799 Speaker 2: And it's I but also her sitting there having to 744 00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:37,600 Speaker 2: pretend that they're Mary, you know, when they're separated. The 745 00:43:37,640 --> 00:43:39,160 Speaker 2: whole thing is just like I. 746 00:43:39,080 --> 00:43:41,840 Speaker 1: Think people sometimes forget, like what would it be like, 747 00:43:41,840 --> 00:43:46,680 Speaker 1: I mean, Jamma, even in the time we've known each other, Like, 748 00:43:46,719 --> 00:43:50,960 Speaker 1: can you imagine if there was a camera on me? Uh? 749 00:43:51,040 --> 00:43:55,319 Speaker 1: I mean, friend, legit, I have some said and done 750 00:43:55,360 --> 00:43:59,800 Speaker 1: some shit probably you know, Like it's unfair. It's just unfair. 751 00:44:00,280 --> 00:44:02,960 Speaker 1: It's beautiful that you all put yourself in the public eye. 752 00:44:03,040 --> 00:44:05,880 Speaker 1: I think it's admirable. It's also I'm just never envious. 753 00:44:05,920 --> 00:44:07,799 Speaker 1: I've said that to you, I say that to her. 754 00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:09,120 Speaker 1: Is that it almost everybody. 755 00:44:09,920 --> 00:44:12,680 Speaker 2: Well, I think she's walking through it really, really gracefully. 756 00:44:12,680 --> 00:44:17,759 Speaker 2: And there is a piece too where I remember when 757 00:44:17,800 --> 00:44:22,320 Speaker 2: she did the table talk stuff where and then about 758 00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:26,279 Speaker 2: the whole entanglement stuff and then now saying she's so 759 00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:27,799 Speaker 2: My first thing was like, well, the why not just 760 00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:31,000 Speaker 2: be all honest. Well, you know what, sometimes when I 761 00:44:31,080 --> 00:44:33,799 Speaker 2: was too honest, that's when I don't have it figured out. 762 00:44:33,920 --> 00:44:35,239 Speaker 2: That's when it's not good. 763 00:44:35,760 --> 00:44:37,399 Speaker 1: Yeah. And also like, I don't know that I've ever 764 00:44:37,440 --> 00:44:42,279 Speaker 1: had everybody figured out enough to go public with anything, right, right, 765 00:44:42,440 --> 00:44:46,359 Speaker 1: I mean I haven't still don't. Well, I love you, 766 00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:49,360 Speaker 1: I love you, and thank you for sharing your people. 767 00:44:50,719 --> 00:44:53,120 Speaker 1: I needed today. I actually needed a lot of that 768 00:44:53,160 --> 00:44:57,640 Speaker 1: book too. The cover is beautiful too. Yeah, all the 769 00:44:57,640 --> 00:45:00,239 Speaker 1: little pieces of her creating her own ODO. 770 00:45:00,760 --> 00:45:04,320 Speaker 2: So everyone go get the book. Worthy by Jada Pinkett 771 00:45:04,360 --> 00:45:05,680 Speaker 2: Smith will be back next week. 772 00:45:06,680 --> 00:45:11,799 Speaker 3: Bye.