WEBVTT - Ep 342: Defining Your Own Ambition 0:00:06.280 --> 0:00:17.200 Hey, hey, Hey, Yes, we're bad. We're Black Mountain Ambition. 0:00:17.600 --> 0:00:24.560 Ambition is Ambition Studio. Mandy. 0:00:25.480 --> 0:00:29.120 Hi, I feel so happy to actually have a regular 0:00:29.200 --> 0:00:32.279 voice again. I'm sure. I'm sure y'all are y'all are 0:00:32.280 --> 0:00:34.120 sick and tired of listening to me be sick and tired. 0:00:34.200 --> 0:00:36.440 So it's so good to see you again. I had 0:00:36.440 --> 0:00:37.920 to write solo last week. 0:00:38.840 --> 0:00:41.800 Yeah, that's all. Yeah, I honestly, I was still in Kenya. 0:00:41.920 --> 0:00:42.200 Witch. 0:00:42.400 --> 0:00:44.360 Let me tell you something, Mandy, let me tell you something. 0:00:44.680 --> 0:00:45.000 Okay. 0:00:45.200 --> 0:00:47.440 I went to Kenya and the girls were going up 0:00:47.479 --> 0:00:53.000 for Brown Ambition. The Kenyan girls in Kenya. They were like, Tam, Mandy. 0:00:52.720 --> 0:00:55.200 I'm terrible with access. I love her. I was like, 0:00:56.440 --> 0:00:59.040 I'm sorry, yes, can you imagine? 0:00:59.200 --> 0:00:59.760 Can you tour? 0:01:00.120 --> 0:01:00.320 Yeah? 0:01:00.640 --> 0:01:02.520 When I tell you, I couldn't believe, not one not 0:01:02.560 --> 0:01:02.960 to that thing. 0:01:03.040 --> 0:01:06.200 I mean, I couldn't believe how many women were like, 0:01:06.440 --> 0:01:08.920 oh my god, I love you, Budjanista. I listened to 0:01:08.920 --> 0:01:11.880 brand ambishon all the time. I'm like, and I'm thinking, like, oh, 0:01:12.319 --> 0:01:13.960 you're here on the trip with us. You live in 0:01:14.000 --> 0:01:15.960 the US, but you just have to be Kenyan. They're like, no, No, 0:01:15.959 --> 0:01:18.680 I live in Kenya. I'm like, wait, you listened to 0:01:18.720 --> 0:01:20.959 Brown and Mission here on the Motherland at Kenya. 0:01:21.360 --> 0:01:22.880 They're like, yes, I love it. 0:01:22.959 --> 0:01:25.480 I couldn't, honestly, I said, wait till I tell Mandy. 0:01:25.480 --> 0:01:26.720 So shout out to you Kenyan women. 0:01:27.240 --> 0:01:28.399 We love you. 0:01:29.880 --> 0:01:32.960 Kenya is popping, like a lot of people are talking 0:01:32.959 --> 0:01:36.600 about Nairobi and she's like having this whole renaissance and 0:01:36.720 --> 0:01:38.119 like such a great prid to live. Is that where 0:01:38.160 --> 0:01:38.440 you were? 0:01:38.920 --> 0:01:39.120 Yeah? 0:01:39.120 --> 0:01:41.280 So I was in Nairobi and also to oh I 0:01:41.600 --> 0:01:44.119 flew to we flew to the coach. So I went 0:01:44.160 --> 0:01:48.800 on this trip called the Safe Journey Retreat that's done 0:01:48.800 --> 0:01:49.880 by Ijoma Kola. 0:01:50.360 --> 0:01:51.400 She is Nigerian. 0:01:51.520 --> 0:01:55.320 We actually grew up together and her husband is Kenyan 0:01:55.760 --> 0:01:58.320 and so she she moved to Kenya, Kenya after marrying 0:01:58.360 --> 0:01:59.880 him and they now is back in the States. But 0:02:00.280 --> 0:02:02.120 she went loved it was like the girls have to 0:02:02.120 --> 0:02:04.640 come out here. So she has this black woman retreat. 0:02:04.760 --> 0:02:07.960 This was their first one and she asked me to speak. 0:02:08.160 --> 0:02:11.200 It was maybe like four or five other speakers. But 0:02:11.240 --> 0:02:14.880 when I tell you, the sisterhood, it was the perfect 0:02:14.919 --> 0:02:16.400 way to start the new year because I was there 0:02:16.400 --> 0:02:18.760 from the first to the ten, so ten days and 0:02:18.960 --> 0:02:25.680 to be surrounded by amazing, kind, loving, funny, multifaceted Black women. 0:02:25.960 --> 0:02:28.959 So each a herself is a PhD. So she also 0:02:29.040 --> 0:02:32.240 has this Black woman PhD community group that she started, 0:02:32.480 --> 0:02:34.800 so so many of the women there were also PhD. 0:02:34.919 --> 0:02:38.359 So these brilliant but then you know, black women brilliant, 0:02:38.400 --> 0:02:40.920 but also like, girl, let me change something. It was 0:02:42.080 --> 0:02:45.400 it was when I tell you everything. And then Kenya 0:02:45.440 --> 0:02:49.200 itself was most places I go and I'm like that 0:02:49.320 --> 0:02:51.120 was great, but I'm gonna go someplace else because you know, 0:02:51.639 --> 0:02:53.960 you know, time is money. But Kenya I would go 0:02:54.000 --> 0:02:55.639 back again so much, so I would go back again 0:02:55.720 --> 0:02:59.800 this year because to Nairobi was amazing. All the hotels 0:03:00.040 --> 0:03:02.360 dy and were amazing. You know, we got to go 0:03:02.440 --> 0:03:04.840 to the museum, we did it so far, which was 0:03:05.200 --> 0:03:07.840 out of this world. And then we flew into Kenya 0:03:08.240 --> 0:03:10.640 to the coast. I think it started with the ann Milani. 0:03:10.960 --> 0:03:14.160 I'm staying it wrong, but that hotel it looked. 0:03:13.880 --> 0:03:17.040 Like a I don't even know, like a. 0:03:16.760 --> 0:03:20.120 Moroccan castle and it was right on the beach. It 0:03:20.200 --> 0:03:24.880 was just every turn was so beautiful. I just honestly 0:03:25.240 --> 0:03:26.960 not even a ten out of ten a twenty out 0:03:26.960 --> 0:03:31.240 of ten. It restored, it rejuvenated, It just did all 0:03:31.240 --> 0:03:32.600 the things that I needed and more because it was 0:03:32.639 --> 0:03:35.560 the holiday season, if I'm being honest, was really really 0:03:36.000 --> 0:03:38.000 hard for me this holiday season. It really hit me 0:03:38.040 --> 0:03:40.320 that Jirell wasn't here, and it took me out. Like 0:03:40.360 --> 0:03:43.040 I was like dark room, laying in the bed, could 0:03:43.040 --> 0:03:44.880 barely get up, didn't want to shower, I didn't want 0:03:44.880 --> 0:03:46.840 to brush my teeth, and I didn't even want to 0:03:46.840 --> 0:03:48.720 go to Kenya honestly, Like I didn't pack until like 0:03:48.720 --> 0:03:51.800 the day before, you know, and I dragged myself to 0:03:51.840 --> 0:03:54.880 the airport, and it poured back into me everything I 0:03:54.880 --> 0:03:58.080 needed and more. And so like if she ever has 0:03:58.120 --> 0:04:02.720 that retreat again, I recommended had times a thousand, not 0:04:02.760 --> 0:04:05.480 just for the women, but also have the planned Oh yeah, 0:04:05.560 --> 0:04:07.720 I mean, you know, like I don't know what I 0:04:07.720 --> 0:04:10.520 would have done honestly, because it was it really took 0:04:10.560 --> 0:04:12.240 me out. So yeah, I'm just so grateful, but I'm 0:04:12.280 --> 0:04:14.120 so happy to be back. And yes, the Kenyan women 0:04:14.240 --> 0:04:15.360 go up. 0:04:17.040 --> 0:04:19.000 That's my brother's hope is that we're going to get 0:04:19.040 --> 0:04:21.240 my little brother. He's like you me, Dad, were going 0:04:21.279 --> 0:04:23.279 to make a trip to he wants to do Kenya 0:04:23.360 --> 0:04:26.400 or South Africa in I was like twenty twenty four 0:04:26.800 --> 0:04:28.240 because I. 0:04:28.200 --> 0:04:29.279 Got the baby's coming. 0:04:29.320 --> 0:04:31.680 Baby, the baby is coming. 0:04:32.760 --> 0:04:32.920 Yeah. 0:04:32.960 --> 0:04:35.440 I just heard his little heartbeat this morning. He's in 0:04:35.520 --> 0:04:39.040 there kicking on my bladder. Let me know he's there. Yeah, 0:04:39.120 --> 0:04:42.159 I'm very excited. Yeah I am, I'm almost. I have 0:04:42.279 --> 0:04:44.159 had lunch with a friend. Remember we talked about before 0:04:44.240 --> 0:04:46.480 the for like our New Year's episode. We were talking 0:04:46.520 --> 0:04:48.320 about our intentions for the New year, and I think 0:04:48.360 --> 0:04:50.320 one of the themes that really resonated was the sense 0:04:50.360 --> 0:04:52.960 of making time to reconnect. So like you and me, 0:04:53.080 --> 0:04:53.760 we need some time. 0:04:54.279 --> 0:04:54.479 Yes. 0:04:54.720 --> 0:04:57.200 And then I saw one of my oldest girlfriends who 0:04:57.279 --> 0:04:59.240 I hadn't seen since August, which is a damn shame. 0:04:59.279 --> 0:05:01.000 We used to like you know, when you work together 0:05:01.040 --> 0:05:03.200 in your twenties. We were just like a cubicle away 0:05:03.400 --> 0:05:06.320 and we were in each other's business. You know. All 0:05:06.360 --> 0:05:08.239 I knew everything I knew is she ate for breakfast. 0:05:08.320 --> 0:05:10.680 I knew how she was feeling about the weather, like everything, 0:05:10.720 --> 0:05:13.000 And now I just found out she had shingles, She 0:05:13.080 --> 0:05:15.680 had a whole illness. Yeah, well, you know we were 0:05:15.760 --> 0:05:17.440 catching up, but like she had COVID and then shingles, 0:05:17.480 --> 0:05:19.120 and I'm like, yeah, I have flu and bronchitis and 0:05:19.400 --> 0:05:22.040 other stuff was happening, new jobs and stuff, but it 0:05:22.080 --> 0:05:23.680 was so lovely and I got to go to city 0:05:24.200 --> 0:05:27.080 and felt it felt really good to start reconnecting with 0:05:28.040 --> 0:05:31.479 just new friends and not new friends old friends. In 0:05:31.560 --> 0:05:34.200 twenty twenty three, and I'm trying to get it all done, 0:05:34.880 --> 0:05:37.520 you know, before May, because I got this ticking, this 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:42.200 ticking clock, and we planned speaking up. We're planning like 0:05:42.240 --> 0:05:44.360 a little baby moon, which will be our first time 0:05:44.400 --> 0:05:48.400 traveling anywhere since twenty nineteen. Like it's pretty sad, you know, 0:05:49.279 --> 0:05:50.680 but we're going to Costa Rica. 0:05:51.000 --> 0:05:55.080 Ooh excited. I love It's very beautiful and lush. 0:05:55.560 --> 0:05:59.320 I just want nature and quiet. And I feel kind 0:05:59.320 --> 0:06:01.000 of like I feel I need twinge of guilt that 0:06:01.120 --> 0:06:04.240 Rio is gonna miss out, but like it'll be okay, 0:06:04.320 --> 0:06:06.880 He's gonna be fine. He'll see the slots another time, 0:06:07.080 --> 0:06:07.279 you know. 0:06:07.600 --> 0:06:09.520 Plus he's still really because how old is Rio? 0:06:10.320 --> 0:06:10.800 He's three? 0:06:11.600 --> 0:06:14.280 Yeah, So it's like the kind of vacation that he 0:06:14.360 --> 0:06:17.160 might remember, like a general thing, but not the specific 0:06:17.160 --> 0:06:18.600 things anyway. So it's like I'll give you one more 0:06:18.680 --> 0:06:22.480 year before You're like, I remember, I could. 0:06:22.360 --> 0:06:24.240 Hardly take two hours on a plane to Atlanta. I 0:06:24.240 --> 0:06:25.640 don't know how I would do five and a half. 0:06:26.000 --> 0:06:27.520 I know, Oh my god. 0:06:27.800 --> 0:06:30.200 But I saw some like I wanted to kind of 0:06:30.200 --> 0:06:31.880 you know, we used to do Buzzworthy back. 0:06:31.760 --> 0:06:32.839 In the day. 0:06:33.160 --> 0:06:35.279 I wondered if we can bring back brown Ambition buzz. 0:06:35.279 --> 0:06:36.839 I was like, the ba buzz. Let's call it the 0:06:36.839 --> 0:06:40.400 ba buzz. There's a lot that's been going on, So yeah, 0:06:41.600 --> 0:06:43.640 first do we need to we have to talk about this. 0:06:43.800 --> 0:06:46.800 Have you seen? And and Happy MLK Day everybody? That 0:06:46.960 --> 0:06:50.440 was we're recording on Tuesday. It was yesterday. But have 0:06:50.560 --> 0:06:55.080 you seen the statue in Boston the new Cure? 0:06:57.320 --> 0:06:59.200 I mean I saw the picture was based off of 0:06:59.320 --> 0:07:01.440 but I was like, what is giving? 0:07:04.000 --> 0:07:06.000 I hate myself because it's like I want I'm one 0:07:06.040 --> 0:07:08.400 of those people who I want to appreciate artists, you know, 0:07:08.839 --> 0:07:10.680 their work and all the time and all that. But 0:07:10.720 --> 0:07:12.520 my husband, I didn't really know there was a new 0:07:12.560 --> 0:07:14.720 statue I was going to be unveiled, but all like 0:07:14.800 --> 0:07:16.640 my husband just like puts his phone in front of 0:07:16.640 --> 0:07:18.720 my face and he's like, what do you think that is? 0:07:19.320 --> 0:07:22.080 And we're we were potty training Rio this weekend, and 0:07:22.120 --> 0:07:23.640 all I can think of is is that a like? 0:07:23.760 --> 0:07:25.320 Is that is that gold turd? 0:07:25.440 --> 0:07:25.520 Like? 0:07:25.560 --> 0:07:27.880 What am I looking at here? It was so and 0:07:27.880 --> 0:07:29.880 then I felt so horrible when I learned what it was. 0:07:29.960 --> 0:07:33.640 But yeah, that thing, it's causing a lot of controversy 0:07:33.880 --> 0:07:38.040 because it looks like a sexual act. Yes, I just. 0:07:38.680 --> 0:07:41.800 Beautiful because I'm just like, how many people did that 0:07:41.920 --> 0:07:43.920 have to go through for it to be made? 0:07:44.120 --> 0:07:46.560 And no one said, that's exactly what our producer Emani said. 0:07:47.680 --> 0:07:52.800 No one said pick somebody else the sketches. Maybe they 0:07:52.800 --> 0:07:54.440 had to make like a little mini mirror of means 0:07:54.600 --> 0:07:58.000 of course they did. Yeah, I mean, what do you 0:07:58.080 --> 0:07:59.800 do now? You can't there's no overturn. 0:08:00.200 --> 0:08:06.200 See, I'm like, this massive, it's just phallic symbol. Yeah, 0:08:06.760 --> 0:08:07.560 you need to see it. 0:08:07.720 --> 0:08:10.320 Maybe need to see it in person, you know, from 0:08:10.360 --> 0:08:13.560 the right angle. But uh, why just the arms in 0:08:13.600 --> 0:08:19.880 the hands? Why know torsos or there were heads? I 0:08:20.120 --> 0:08:24.640 just do. It's gotta be really awkward to be at 0:08:24.760 --> 0:08:25.680 MLK descendant. 0:08:26.280 --> 0:08:35.240 I know they're really like, okay, thank you, oh boy, 0:08:35.520 --> 0:08:37.480 So we want to know y'all's thoughts on the new 0:08:37.559 --> 0:08:38.680 MLK statue. 0:08:38.920 --> 0:08:40.640 I want to be the kind of person who can 0:08:40.640 --> 0:08:43.079 find beauty and anything, and like, I just feel bad 0:08:43.080 --> 0:08:45.160 for the artists because God, like, you know, he put 0:08:45.400 --> 0:08:48.559 his whole life on hold for that, and you know, 0:08:49.080 --> 0:08:51.280 art isn't the eye of the beholder or whatever they say. 0:08:51.520 --> 0:08:55.920 Some good news though, so inflation is it's gotten so bad, 0:08:55.960 --> 0:08:59.480 like the cost of groceries and especially eating out. We 0:08:59.520 --> 0:09:02.160 can't even look at door Dash or Uber Eats without 0:09:02.160 --> 0:09:04.360 spending seventy five dollars. It feels like I'm just a 0:09:04.360 --> 0:09:07.280 regular meal. So I even took my butt to Costco 0:09:07.480 --> 0:09:09.000 and I was like, we're gonna be buying in bulk. 0:09:09.280 --> 0:09:12.120 It's a new day, it's a new life. I'm feeling good. 0:09:12.480 --> 0:09:16.160 Oh well, good news is that apparently customers, like consumers, 0:09:16.160 --> 0:09:18.720 we have been changing our shopping habits. Finally it's like 0:09:18.720 --> 0:09:22.719 gotten too expensive, and businesses are finally like, okay, we're 0:09:22.720 --> 0:09:25.400 gonna slow down the price hikes and in some cases 0:09:25.400 --> 0:09:28.160 either going back on them. But it seems like most businesses, 0:09:28.160 --> 0:09:31.400 according to the Wall Street Journal, are just ceasing, you know, 0:09:31.440 --> 0:09:36.000 additional price hikes. So hopefully a carton of eggs ain't 0:09:36.000 --> 0:09:39.080 gonna cost girl you know, twelve dollars anymore. 0:09:39.400 --> 0:09:41.319 Well, we can't eat eggs around here, that's what that means. 0:09:41.360 --> 0:09:43.600 We ain't eating them eggs, but we're gonna have chicks 0:09:43.600 --> 0:09:45.720 to the back, like girl produced, That's what I'm saying. 0:09:45.760 --> 0:09:48.560 How much could it cost to have a chicken? I 0:09:48.559 --> 0:09:51.600 felt so bad. We went to Enrique's my husband's moms 0:09:51.640 --> 0:09:53.600 for I don't know, like lunch the other day, and 0:09:53.720 --> 0:09:56.680 Rio loves making eggs. He's not always interested in eating them. 0:09:57.800 --> 0:09:59.680 And she got the fancy you know, the cage free 0:09:59.800 --> 0:10:03.520 or and he made her make four of them join up. 0:10:03.600 --> 0:10:05.720 And he did not eat a single egg. And I 0:10:05.800 --> 0:10:08.520 was like, Myra, do you need twenty dollars like all 0:10:08.559 --> 0:10:10.920 paint for these eggs? Oh? 0:10:11.000 --> 0:10:15.160 Here, these fancy kids. He's like from gold dust on it. 0:10:16.360 --> 0:10:17.920 I was like, Myra, get one of the you know, 0:10:17.960 --> 0:10:20.920 the blue styrofoam eggs, girl, like, you know, the cheap ones. 0:10:20.960 --> 0:10:22.199 I was like, get some of them for him to 0:10:22.200 --> 0:10:25.959 play with next time. Yeah, oh god. Oh. And then 0:10:26.440 --> 0:10:28.280 I caught a little bit of the Golden Globes just 0:10:28.280 --> 0:10:32.120 because randomly someone was like tweeting about it. But black 0:10:32.160 --> 0:10:37.680 people this Award season in Hollywood were cleaning up cleaning up. 0:10:38.120 --> 0:10:41.440 Have any speeches or any winds touched your heart? 0:10:42.440 --> 0:10:45.640 What I didn't see? I mean, I'm so glad for Quinta. 0:10:45.720 --> 0:10:48.959 Quinta is really like slang. I love that, and I 0:10:49.000 --> 0:10:50.880 love because you know, I remember Quinta from Oh he 0:10:50.960 --> 0:10:52.360 got money from her? 0:10:52.440 --> 0:10:56.120 Ye, like what I can get on my popcorn got 0:10:57.520 --> 0:10:58.480 I remember her from that? 0:10:58.640 --> 0:11:00.080 So she I just love to see this for he 0:11:00.520 --> 0:11:03.840 of course, who does not love the incomparable Cherylie Rolf 0:11:03.880 --> 0:11:05.000 because she's fabulous. 0:11:05.120 --> 0:11:07.880 Yes, I was sad she didn't win the Golden Globe 0:11:07.880 --> 0:11:10.800 because we didn't get a shiry Lee Ralph's speech, but 0:11:10.840 --> 0:11:15.240 then she won something else, like it was Critics Choice Award. Yes, 0:11:15.520 --> 0:11:17.600 have you seen that clip that's going viral. 0:11:17.840 --> 0:11:19.240 With the one about that Kim Kardashian. 0:11:20.360 --> 0:11:22.880 No, oh that one too, but no that was Golden Globes. 0:11:22.920 --> 0:11:24.680 No this one. She's like giving the speech and she's like, 0:11:24.720 --> 0:11:26.600 it doesn't matter what anyone thinks about you. We should 0:11:26.600 --> 0:11:27.880 just play a clip because I'm not going to do 0:11:27.920 --> 0:11:31.000 her justice at all. But basically, it's like, you better 0:11:31.040 --> 0:11:32.680 love what you see in the mirror. It doesn't matter 0:11:32.679 --> 0:11:35.480 when anyone else you know thinks about you. Is really moving. 0:11:36.120 --> 0:11:38.680 Yes, No, I love that, honestly, I just I'm just 0:11:38.720 --> 0:11:41.800 really I just love to see that people are getting 0:11:42.559 --> 0:11:45.880 you know, that people are getting appreciated while they're still here, 0:11:46.000 --> 0:11:46.560 you know what I mean. 0:11:47.000 --> 0:11:48.320 Yeah, And so I just love to see that. 0:11:48.360 --> 0:11:50.320 I mean, I mean because Charlie, she says she's been 0:11:50.320 --> 0:11:53.800 an icon, I mean, from Dreamgirls to I think she 0:11:53.880 --> 0:11:58.000 woned like miss Jamaica Toshau's mama. 0:11:58.760 --> 0:12:02.120 She'd been out here. Yeah, so she ain't new to this, 0:12:02.160 --> 0:12:02.840 She's true to this. 0:12:02.880 --> 0:12:05.440 So it's nice for the bigger I mean, the black 0:12:05.440 --> 0:12:08.280 girl we knew we were like girl, not not Ryl. 0:12:08.920 --> 0:12:11.280 Right, but you know, sorry miss Lee Ralph because you 0:12:11.280 --> 0:12:12.640 know you're grown. But you know what I mean. But 0:12:12.679 --> 0:12:15.400 I love when people kind of get a chance. 0:12:15.200 --> 0:12:18.240 To cross over and become household names. 0:12:18.320 --> 0:12:19.040 Yeah, you know what I mean. 0:12:19.120 --> 0:12:21.000 That's what you're wanting, you know what I mean, Because 0:12:21.000 --> 0:12:22.960 not everybody's wanting that, you know, but that's what you're wanting. 0:12:23.000 --> 0:12:25.000 And so I'm loving that she's getting kind of like 0:12:25.040 --> 0:12:27.360 this turn to be seen and appreciated. 0:12:27.440 --> 0:12:29.920 So I love that, and the girls are loving what's 0:12:29.920 --> 0:12:32.319 his face? What's this? Tyler? James Williams the guy who 0:12:32.320 --> 0:12:34.199 plays mister m As. 0:12:34.480 --> 0:12:35.199 Do you like Abbat? 0:12:35.320 --> 0:12:35.720 I love it. 0:12:35.800 --> 0:12:39.560 You know I don't watch TV, so wait, I know 0:12:40.480 --> 0:12:42.000 you know what. You don't even shame me, but on 0:12:42.120 --> 0:12:43.920 stream I know. 0:12:44.080 --> 0:12:45.720 I don't read books. 0:12:46.000 --> 0:12:48.080 No, I just I've been doing a lot of walking. 0:12:48.320 --> 0:12:49.559 I just because I got out of the habit of 0:12:49.600 --> 0:12:52.440 watching TV when I started the Budgeonessa because who had time. 0:12:52.720 --> 0:12:54.480 And then it's hard for me to get back in 0:12:54.480 --> 0:12:57.400 the happen because I get so bored so easily. So 0:12:57.440 --> 0:12:59.320 I watch the little clips here and there, so like, 0:12:59.360 --> 0:13:01.320 don't shame me, and I'm actually like act tonight, I 0:13:01.360 --> 0:13:03.439 told myself, I'm taking myself out on a date, me, 0:13:03.559 --> 0:13:05.440 myself and I, the three of us, and we're gonna 0:13:05.440 --> 0:13:06.640 go see Black Panther. 0:13:06.720 --> 0:13:08.880 I haven't seen it. Don't get nobody either. 0:13:10.760 --> 0:13:13.559 No, no, I haven't because me like a pole babysitter 0:13:13.600 --> 0:13:15.720 to see it, and then the times are always so 0:13:15.880 --> 0:13:19.520 inconvenient for babysitter hours. Yeah, no, I'm I'm gonna go. 0:13:19.520 --> 0:13:21.600 I'm waiting for it to come on streaming. I gave up. 0:13:21.640 --> 0:13:23.840 I said I was gonna but I said, you know what, Tiffany, 0:13:24.240 --> 0:13:26.320 go outside, girl. 0:13:26.960 --> 0:13:28.600 I said, Glass slide. I said, you know what, I'm 0:13:28.600 --> 0:13:28.880 gonna go. 0:13:28.880 --> 0:13:30.920 I'm gonna actually gonna treat myself to one of the 0:13:30.960 --> 0:13:33.640 dining theaters. Girl were gonna be fancy in the WHOA 0:13:34.559 --> 0:13:36.599 love those girls. So have you seen me out on 0:13:36.640 --> 0:13:39.800 about and You're like, ooh, she with other people? It's 0:13:39.880 --> 0:13:43.200 myself and I. 0:13:41.920 --> 0:13:43.920 Well, damn it. So I'm gonna have to cross off 0:13:44.000 --> 0:13:48.040 below deck discussion from my list of buzzworthy because I've 0:13:48.040 --> 0:13:50.720 been obsessed with below deck, y'all, it's so messy and delicious. 0:13:53.160 --> 0:13:55.719 All right, Uh an employee and employment news. Well, one 0:13:55.720 --> 0:13:57.680 thing I just wanted to like, I had a coaching session. 0:13:57.720 --> 0:14:00.640 I sometimes this is off the record except for you 0:14:00.679 --> 0:14:03.680 guys when women are let go from their jobs. And like, 0:14:03.720 --> 0:14:05.520 if I've ever given you a coaching session, if you 0:14:05.520 --> 0:14:07.480 reach out to me, I'm probably going to offer pro 0:14:07.520 --> 0:14:11.040 bono coaching session if you've been let go. And so 0:14:11.080 --> 0:14:13.640 I met this young woman earlier today and she had 0:14:13.640 --> 0:14:15.360 been let go from a big tech company. I'm not 0:14:15.400 --> 0:14:17.520 going to put her business out there, and like, you know, 0:14:17.640 --> 0:14:19.600 thousands of people were let go from this tech company 0:14:20.200 --> 0:14:23.600 and she was so down. I mean, obviously it's it 0:14:23.720 --> 0:14:26.560 sucks because these layups have been happening, you know, right 0:14:26.560 --> 0:14:30.800 around the holidays, and it really broke my heart because 0:14:31.320 --> 0:14:34.560 she's the second, no, the third woman who I've met 0:14:34.640 --> 0:14:36.560 who was let go the same year that they made 0:14:36.600 --> 0:14:39.640 the change to that new job. And the sense of like, 0:14:40.080 --> 0:14:42.520 when it's hard enough to take a career risk, right, 0:14:42.560 --> 0:14:44.760 and to move new to move new jobs and all 0:14:44.800 --> 0:14:49.040 of that, and sometimes we forget like there's this element 0:14:49.080 --> 0:14:51.480 of shame to being let go and then let and 0:14:51.520 --> 0:14:53.640 then you have this fear that if people you used 0:14:53.640 --> 0:14:56.400 to work with find out that they're going to have 0:14:56.560 --> 0:14:59.200 like they're going to be judgmental about it, like, oh, 0:15:00.240 --> 0:15:02.280 you were all, you know, cool because you got a 0:15:02.360 --> 0:15:05.920 job at this big tech company. And to hear her, 0:15:06.440 --> 0:15:08.480 I mean, she got she was getting emotional about it, 0:15:08.520 --> 0:15:10.960 you know, because I was suggesting that she posts on 0:15:11.000 --> 0:15:14.320 LinkedIn and announces that she's open to work and all 0:15:14.360 --> 0:15:16.680 of that, but there was this like she really didn't 0:15:16.720 --> 0:15:19.920 want to do it, and she's just in the thick 0:15:20.080 --> 0:15:23.000 of that job search. And so it just reminded me 0:15:23.040 --> 0:15:26.520 that all these statistics about like layoffs and even though 0:15:26.520 --> 0:15:30.000 the job market is still strong, there are people suffering 0:15:30.000 --> 0:15:32.920 from like long term unemployment and long term job searching 0:15:32.920 --> 0:15:36.680 out there, and so I just want to like acknowledge 0:15:36.680 --> 0:15:39.360 that and say, you know, if you're feeling shame about it, 0:15:40.040 --> 0:15:43.240 I really hope that you can be compassionate for yourself. 0:15:44.280 --> 0:15:47.120 You're so not alone, and I feel like there's so 0:15:47.200 --> 0:15:48.640 much I was trying to tell her. There's more to 0:15:48.640 --> 0:15:51.160 be gained by telling that story and sharing it, I 0:15:51.200 --> 0:15:55.240 believe than any potential downside of maybe someone passing a 0:15:55.320 --> 0:16:00.000 judgmental you know, thought about you, Because I feel like, 0:16:00.040 --> 0:16:01.800 if you don't share it or talk about it sometimes, 0:16:01.840 --> 0:16:03.880 how do you then open yourself up to the help 0:16:04.920 --> 0:16:08.320 and support of other people. So that was on my 0:16:09.520 --> 0:16:10.200 spirit today. 0:16:11.440 --> 0:16:12.800 Maybe I could just save in lives. 0:16:14.040 --> 0:16:15.320 I don't know if I saved your life in half 0:16:15.360 --> 0:16:17.440 an hour, but I made her you know what I mean. 0:16:17.800 --> 0:16:20.600 Like there's just like sometimes you just need that person 0:16:20.640 --> 0:16:22.360 to like, you know, pour into you, encourage you. 0:16:22.400 --> 0:16:23.600 And so I love that you did. 0:16:23.440 --> 0:16:26.280 That for her. Yeah. Please, I mean I'm coming from 0:16:26.280 --> 0:16:28.760 the person who quit a job, didn't take a job, 0:16:28.880 --> 0:16:30.840 came back six months later begging for the same job, 0:16:30.960 --> 0:16:33.240 got the job, got a new job, and quit a 0:16:33.280 --> 0:16:35.400 month later, and then got laid off from that job 0:16:35.400 --> 0:16:36.840 that she quit for. That's my story. 0:16:36.920 --> 0:16:37.320 Okay. 0:16:37.520 --> 0:16:39.840 I know, don't talk to like. I've been there, I've 0:16:39.920 --> 0:16:42.520 taken their risks, I've fallen on my ass and I'm like, 0:16:42.600 --> 0:16:46.920 it's okay, you know, it's okay, all right. And our 0:16:47.040 --> 0:16:50.120 last little news nugget is that if you heard you 0:16:50.120 --> 0:16:52.000 know what non competes are, you probably do because you 0:16:52.000 --> 0:16:55.200 probably have. Yeah, we so the fts Yeah, and like 0:16:55.440 --> 0:16:57.920 non competes for employees, they can really stop you from 0:16:58.280 --> 0:17:01.000 being able to work for other big places or like, 0:17:01.040 --> 0:17:04.600 you know, navigate your career strategically because your company may 0:17:04.600 --> 0:17:06.560 have a non compete saying you can't work for any 0:17:06.600 --> 0:17:09.600 other fer months like ours, and if you do, you know, 0:17:09.640 --> 0:17:12.639 really specific work that could limit your opportunities. So the 0:17:12.760 --> 0:17:16.200 FTC good news. The FTC is like pushing to ban 0:17:16.840 --> 0:17:20.680 non competes and employers are losing their damn minds. 0:17:21.119 --> 0:17:22.280 Well here's my take. 0:17:22.400 --> 0:17:24.720 I mean, I can see like not if you're not 0:17:24.760 --> 0:17:28.160 working for me anymore, okay, but I don't want someone 0:17:28.160 --> 0:17:30.680 who is simultaneously because sometimes people have side hustles, which 0:17:30.680 --> 0:17:34.840 I encourage, but don't side hustle with. Like, although I'm 0:17:34.840 --> 0:17:36.159 not gonna say I have a competitor or whatever, you 0:17:36.240 --> 0:17:38.119 know what I mean? So because that's not really but 0:17:38.200 --> 0:17:39.280 do you know what I mean? Because there a definitely 0:17:39.320 --> 0:17:42.560 some point where I'm just like, yeah, yeah, I wouldn't 0:17:42.600 --> 0:17:47.160 want someone working with me and then also working with 0:17:47.560 --> 0:17:49.879 someone you know what, that's actually true. For example, Tracy, 0:17:50.160 --> 0:17:52.800 my publicays, came to me and said, Hey, Tiffany, I've 0:17:52.840 --> 0:17:56.080 got this potential client. She reached out to me, wants 0:17:56.119 --> 0:17:59.240 to work with me. But she asked, would this compete 0:17:59.280 --> 0:18:02.199 with your client the bunch of Nista, And I was like, 0:18:02.280 --> 0:18:05.040 probably not because she's Tracy has worked with other financial 0:18:05.080 --> 0:18:07.520 brands before. But then when she described a woman, I 0:18:07.560 --> 0:18:11.280 was like, actually that is what I do, you know, 0:18:11.440 --> 0:18:14.560 because for example, she's worked with people who only talk 0:18:14.600 --> 0:18:18.280