WEBVTT - Short Stuff: The Zipper Merge

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, I'm welcome to the Short Stuff. I'm Josh, and

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<v Speaker 1>there's Chuck and Jerry's here too.

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<v Speaker 2>Get ready for a contentious Short Stuff episode.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think it's gonna be contentious because I think

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<v Speaker 1>it's just right. And I think that once you've learned this,

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<v Speaker 1>you actually feel like if it was contentious to you before,

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<v Speaker 1>you might feel like a bit of jackass. I know

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<v Speaker 1>I did.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, I'm gonna have some things to say.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, let's get into it, okay. You know, Chuck, when

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<v Speaker 1>you see a sign you're cruising it on the highway.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, baby, you got the wind, Yeah, got windows down,

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<v Speaker 2>you got bugs on your teeth, yeah, yeah, the whole shebang, right,

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<v Speaker 2>And then all of a sudden there's a sign up

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<v Speaker 2>ahead that says the lane you're in right now, buddy,

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<v Speaker 2>is going to be closing in about a thousand or

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<v Speaker 2>so feet.

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<v Speaker 1>That's verbatim, by the way.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you jam on the brakes and you get over.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah as fast as you can, probably knock another car

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<v Speaker 1>out of the lane next to you as you get

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<v Speaker 1>into it. But right after you get it, you come

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<v Speaker 1>to almost a complete stop because everyone in the lane

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<v Speaker 1>you were just in did the same thing. And by

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<v Speaker 1>merging suddenly with another lane, it basically brings traffic to

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<v Speaker 1>a halt, and it actually is a fairly dangerous thing

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<v Speaker 1>to do, especially at higher speeds. Yeah, there's another way. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>as you put this one together and you said, there

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<v Speaker 1>are two ways. That first way, which you just mentioned

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<v Speaker 1>just getting right over. The second way, which is to

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<v Speaker 1>wait until that lane basically runs out and then hop over.

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<v Speaker 1>Now there is a third way, which is.

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<v Speaker 2>Just drive until you see someone sitting on their phone,

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<v Speaker 2>leaving a seven car gap between them, and then you

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<v Speaker 2>just pop over there. Yes, and it's a joke, but

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<v Speaker 2>it's really not.

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<v Speaker 1>No, because the people who stay in that lane that's

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<v Speaker 1>being shut down and are able to get way far

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<v Speaker 1>ahead of everybody else in the lane that's the through

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<v Speaker 1>lane that's not being shut down that everybody had to

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<v Speaker 1>get over into, they're not actually jerks. They Okay, they

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<v Speaker 1>may be jerks because they might not actually know this

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<v Speaker 1>is the thing you're supposed to do, but they're actually

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<v Speaker 1>know it or not doing the thing you're supposed to do.

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<v Speaker 1>It's called zipper merging, and you're supposed to essentially stay

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<v Speaker 1>in that lane that's getting shut down until the last

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<v Speaker 1>possible moment. You're not supposed to get over before then,

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<v Speaker 1>because when you do, all sorts of bad things happen.

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<v Speaker 1>You just stay in that lane and somebody in the

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<v Speaker 1>next lane lets you in and you just zoom on through.

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<v Speaker 2>All right. So here's my first problem with that is

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<v Speaker 2>what happens is you get to the end of that

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<v Speaker 2>thing and it's called an alternate merge, which means you

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<v Speaker 2>alternate and everyone goes, you go, I go, I go.

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<v Speaker 2>That's not what happens in today's America, though. People are jerks,

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<v Speaker 2>and they they hug the mumper in front of them

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<v Speaker 2>and say, you're not getting in front of me. And

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<v Speaker 2>that's what comes up the works is people wait till

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<v Speaker 2>the last minute and then get into a battle of

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<v Speaker 2>wills because people don't take turns. If people took turns,

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<v Speaker 2>this would be as beautiful as the Germans call it

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<v Speaker 2>rice ver Schluz, which means zipper, the rice ver Schluze system,

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<v Speaker 2>the Zipper merge. It is beautiful and elegant, except for

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<v Speaker 2>the fact that Americans are jerks in their cars and

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<v Speaker 2>don't let people in and don't take turns.

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<v Speaker 3>You know what I mean.

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<v Speaker 1>Kind of I mean, I know what you mean, but

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<v Speaker 1>I don't fully agree with it, I guess is what

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<v Speaker 1>I was trying to say.

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<v Speaker 2>That people do that.

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<v Speaker 1>No, no, no, I think they definitely do do that, but

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<v Speaker 1>that's not the thing that holds everything up. Let's let's

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<v Speaker 1>take a break and we'll come back and I will

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<v Speaker 1>explain my position.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, all right, Well, now we're on the road, driving

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<v Speaker 2>in your truck.

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<v Speaker 3>Want to learn a thing or two from Josh Chuck.

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<v Speaker 3>It's stuff you should know, all right, all right, explain away, buddy.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, I'm explaining. Get this. Yes, that causes a slowdown

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<v Speaker 1>for the people in the right lane, the lane that's

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<v Speaker 1>being shut down, But that is generally insignificant for that

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<v Speaker 1>person because that one jerk who's hugging the bumper of

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<v Speaker 1>the person in front of and won't let them in

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<v Speaker 1>purposely won't let them in. There's maybe three or four

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<v Speaker 1>of those people in a row before somebody, like you said,

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<v Speaker 1>is either not paying attention or is kind harder enough

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<v Speaker 1>to be like, all right, go ahead, get in, all right. So, yes,

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<v Speaker 1>it's a bit of a slowdown for the people in

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<v Speaker 1>the shutdown lane.

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<v Speaker 2>What not like it would be if everyone just tried

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<v Speaker 2>to jump over. Yes, that's what you're saying.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that's the problem. That's the slowdown. The people who

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<v Speaker 1>are getting over from the lane that's being shut down. Prima.

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<v Speaker 1>Surely when you get over at any point before the

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<v Speaker 1>last possible point to get over, if you get over

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<v Speaker 1>at any point before then, you are shooting yourself in

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<v Speaker 1>the foot and everybody else because you you are causing

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<v Speaker 1>the slow down. You are the reason that this lane

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<v Speaker 1>is suddenly bumpered a bumper because now we lane and

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<v Speaker 1>have gotten the through lane that everybody in the closed

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<v Speaker 1>down lane had to get into. You're the reason that

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<v Speaker 1>that slowed down and that that's bumper a bumper, and

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<v Speaker 1>that people are kicked off because an unfair advantage has

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<v Speaker 1>this been created for the people who are doing what

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<v Speaker 1>you're supposed to do and staying in the closing lane

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<v Speaker 1>until the last possible minute.

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<v Speaker 2>In zipper merging, all right, let me ask you this,

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<v Speaker 2>is there any data on because there is some data

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<v Speaker 2>that you found that says if you zipper merge effectively,

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<v Speaker 2>which never happens, but let's just say it does, it

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<v Speaker 2>cuts congestion by.

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<v Speaker 1>Fort get's huge.

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<v Speaker 3>It's huge.

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<v Speaker 2>Uh, it is gonna reduce crashes because people are getting

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<v Speaker 2>I have an issue with this one. People are getting

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<v Speaker 2>over at the same rate of speed as the people

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<v Speaker 2>in the through lane. But I generally think this happens

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<v Speaker 2>when traffic is pretty slow, so it's not like you

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<v Speaker 2>usually don't see a zipper merge happening when people are

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<v Speaker 2>going like seventy miles an hour.

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<v Speaker 1>No, some people really haul and then zip into like

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<v Speaker 1>a spot all of a sudden, and they have to

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<v Speaker 1>basically slam on their brakes because they just move through

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<v Speaker 1>a quick movement over that's forced by the fact that

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<v Speaker 1>people in the through lane aren't zipper merging they got

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<v Speaker 1>over too early.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, my question though, is if you're in the end

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<v Speaker 2>you may not know this, but if you're in the

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<v Speaker 2>through lane, I probably do and people are are. Are

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<v Speaker 2>you see them zippering over and non zippering over? Like

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<v Speaker 2>should you get over one lane to the left or

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<v Speaker 2>does that come up the works? Or should you hold

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<v Speaker 2>the lane?

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<v Speaker 1>Uh? I don't understand fully, say say it again. So

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<v Speaker 1>you're in there, you're driving along the lane that's not

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<v Speaker 1>being shut down.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, and people to your right are either jumping

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<v Speaker 2>over right in front of you or zipper merging correctly. Like,

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<v Speaker 2>should you jump over a lane just to sort of decongest.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, that's one thing that you can do.

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<v Speaker 2>But I try to do that because I just don't

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<v Speaker 2>want to be I don't want to be a part

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<v Speaker 2>of that whole scene.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Well, not only that, by getting over as far

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<v Speaker 1>as you can away from this terrible miss zipped merge,

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<v Speaker 1>you're actually saving yourself a lot of time at heartache.

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<v Speaker 1>You're just getting away from the whole ugly mass. Right, Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>that's one thing you can do. You can either slow

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<v Speaker 1>your roll a little bit to let somebody zipper merge

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<v Speaker 1>in front of you, or you can move over to

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<v Speaker 1>create space for them to get into at that zipper

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<v Speaker 1>merge point. Either one is totally acceptable and a nice

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<v Speaker 1>good thing to do. So yeah, sure I did know

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<v Speaker 1>the answer to your question. Okay, good to know.

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<v Speaker 2>Here's my deal is. I used to get over early,

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<v Speaker 2>but I wouldn't like stop the traffic in that merging

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<v Speaker 2>lane to do it. I would just see an opening

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<v Speaker 2>and do it. And if it was early, it's early.

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<v Speaker 2>Now I kind of like, there's so many people on

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<v Speaker 2>their phones now. Now I tend to wait to the

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<v Speaker 2>end because you can generally get over. Yeah, for sure

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<v Speaker 2>without causing any issue. My big problem is not when

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<v Speaker 2>it's like a legitimate sort of alternate merge and a

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<v Speaker 2>lane merging. My problem, and it's when the person is like, hey,

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<v Speaker 2>you know the highway splits. If you want to go

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<v Speaker 2>on this highway, you're going that way, and you've got

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<v Speaker 2>a bunch of people waiting because traffic's backed up, and

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<v Speaker 2>someone just rides to there's basically no road and tries

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<v Speaker 2>to jump over, which is not the same thing.

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<v Speaker 1>So if you have a lane that runs out right

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<v Speaker 1>in a lane, I'm not talking about a lane running

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<v Speaker 1>out then yeah, you're talking about for sure. Okay, for

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<v Speaker 1>sure they're being pushy, and we should explain to some

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<v Speaker 1>of our listeners and who aren't in the United States,

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<v Speaker 1>because I don't know that this fully applies. I know

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<v Speaker 1>in Germany it sounds like people are ziper merging like

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<v Speaker 1>there's no tomorrow and they're doing really right. But the

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<v Speaker 1>reason people get over prematurely rather than zipper merge on

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<v Speaker 1>American highways is because that seems like the fairest thing

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<v Speaker 1>to do. And so if you're doing that, if you're

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<v Speaker 1>not taking your rightful place in the back of the

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<v Speaker 1>line of this long, unnecessarily slow line of traffic. What

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<v Speaker 1>you're doing is jumping in line. And there are very

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<v Speaker 1>few things that drive Americans crazier, especially once you have

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<v Speaker 1>a finely tuned sense of day to day justice. Right,

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<v Speaker 1>somebody jumping ahead in line, cutting in line. So even

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<v Speaker 1>though you're zipper merging correctly, you're going into last minute

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<v Speaker 1>and getting over, you're not trying to jump in line.

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<v Speaker 1>It's just no one else knows what you know. There's

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<v Speaker 1>a real danger that somebody might try to shoot you.

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<v Speaker 1>In the United States is very very slim. The incidents

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<v Speaker 1>of road radge that result in like gunplay are really

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<v Speaker 1>hype and talked about in the United States, but statistically speaking,

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<v Speaker 1>it's really rare. But there's a real chance that you

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<v Speaker 1>might anger somebody by being so unfair by cutting in line,

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<v Speaker 1>that they might chase you in their car and shoot

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<v Speaker 1>at you while you're driving your car. This is another

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<v Speaker 1>reason why people don't do this.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I mean, beyond that rarity, it is just out

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<v Speaker 2>of hand in the United States, where like if you

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<v Speaker 2>accidentally cut someone off on the highway, like people in

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<v Speaker 2>the United States will get out of that lane, speed up,

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<v Speaker 2>get in front of you, and slam on the brakes

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<v Speaker 2>to pay you back and potentially wreck themselves. It's nuts

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<v Speaker 2>how people act in their cars. It's so out of

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<v Speaker 2>hand and like God, everybody just needs to get it together.

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<v Speaker 2>Australia is at my experience driving there, they drove the

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<v Speaker 2>speed limit. If you came up behind someone on the highway,

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<v Speaker 2>they're like, ah, let's get over out of your way.

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<v Speaker 2>Then it was everyone that's more New Zealand, but everybody

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<v Speaker 2>was just so civil on the roads. And you know,

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<v Speaker 2>we might have Assie's right in and say like that's

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<v Speaker 2>not the deal mate in the cities or whatever. But

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<v Speaker 2>when I was driving around the highways over there, I

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<v Speaker 2>just found everything from moving about in the airport on

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<v Speaker 2>foot to driving around people were generally just like, no,

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<v Speaker 2>go ahead, it's fine.

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<v Speaker 1>Canada is very similar to that, nice nicer people. So yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>it's almost like Americans are like deeply angry and divided

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<v Speaker 1>for some reason. It's a.

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<v Speaker 2>Lot of states, though, as you found, have put a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of money into educational campaigns. Signage, for instance, use

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<v Speaker 2>both lanes to merge point, like until you get to

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<v Speaker 2>the merge point. Stuff like that, Like they're trying to

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<v Speaker 2>get the word out by spending money and saying, hey,

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<v Speaker 2>the zipper merge is where it's at if you're doing

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<v Speaker 2>it right. But it's just there's so much, like you

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<v Speaker 2>point out, there's so much sort of habit and muscle

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<v Speaker 2>memory and how people drive and not wanting to risk

0:12:04.600 --> 0:12:07.400
<v Speaker 2>getting flicked off or whatever. And by the way, don't

0:12:07.400 --> 0:12:10.560
<v Speaker 2>shoot birds in your carry there. That's that's two eighties, like,

0:12:10.760 --> 0:12:11.280
<v Speaker 2>don't do that.

0:12:11.400 --> 0:12:13.120
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, And if someone tries to pass you at like

0:12:13.160 --> 0:12:15.679
<v Speaker 1>a normal rate because you're going slower than they are

0:12:15.720 --> 0:12:18.360
<v Speaker 1>in the lane that you shouldn't be in, don't speed

0:12:18.440 --> 0:12:21.400
<v Speaker 1>up so they can't pass you. That makes you literally

0:12:21.440 --> 0:12:25.160
<v Speaker 1>the worst person on the road in your area. Like

0:12:25.240 --> 0:12:27.640
<v Speaker 1>you're a terrible person right then you might not be

0:12:27.720 --> 0:12:30.720
<v Speaker 1>in general. The car brings terrible things out and people,

0:12:30.840 --> 0:12:34.800
<v Speaker 1>I get that, but in that moment, you're a terrible person,

0:12:35.000 --> 0:12:35.960
<v Speaker 1>a jerk.

0:12:36.200 --> 0:12:38.120
<v Speaker 2>And get out of the left lane for goodness.

0:12:37.840 --> 0:12:41.200
<v Speaker 1>Sake for sure. So some states actually have instituted zipper

0:12:41.240 --> 0:12:45.200
<v Speaker 1>merging as a rule. In Illinois, if you keep somebody

0:12:45.240 --> 0:12:47.640
<v Speaker 1>from merging over into a through lane from a lane

0:12:47.679 --> 0:12:50.520
<v Speaker 1>that's shut down or that's ending, you could be fined.

0:12:50.960 --> 0:12:54.080
<v Speaker 1>You could be pulled over and they could smack the

0:12:54.120 --> 0:12:58.000
<v Speaker 1>back of your calves with their nightsticks just for doing that.

0:12:58.040 --> 0:13:01.240
<v Speaker 2>In Illinois, because there's always a police cruis are there

0:13:01.240 --> 0:13:02.600
<v Speaker 2>when you need them in traffic.

0:13:02.360 --> 0:13:04.400
<v Speaker 1>Right exactly exactly.

0:13:04.040 --> 0:13:06.600
<v Speaker 2>Like when you're going seventy five miles an hour down

0:13:06.640 --> 0:13:08.840
<v Speaker 2>the highway and you look over and you pass someone

0:13:09.240 --> 0:13:11.560
<v Speaker 2>that is literally staring in their lap at on a

0:13:11.600 --> 0:13:13.920
<v Speaker 2>cell phone going like forty seven miles an hour.

0:13:14.000 --> 0:13:16.439
<v Speaker 1>I know, and I'm sure we sound old, but listen up,

0:13:16.600 --> 0:13:20.559
<v Speaker 1>everybody who drives looking at their phone, like watching video

0:13:20.640 --> 0:13:24.199
<v Speaker 1>on their phone. Stop doing that. Please stop doing that immediately.

0:13:24.320 --> 0:13:25.360
<v Speaker 2>You're gonna kill somebody.

0:13:25.440 --> 0:13:28.560
<v Speaker 1>Yep. There is one other thing about this though. States

0:13:28.559 --> 0:13:30.720
<v Speaker 1>have found that if you put up an extra sign

0:13:30.840 --> 0:13:36.040
<v Speaker 1>or two that says literally use both lanes to merge point,

0:13:36.960 --> 0:13:39.720
<v Speaker 1>most people will figure out what you're saying and they

0:13:39.720 --> 0:13:42.360
<v Speaker 1>actually like huh, they actually do the zipper merging.

0:13:43.360 --> 0:13:47.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Hey, I'm down. I mean, Luckily, I don't have

0:13:47.760 --> 0:13:51.760
<v Speaker 2>to drive on the highway very much because my you know,

0:13:52.679 --> 0:13:54.640
<v Speaker 2>even when we were commuting to the studio a lot,

0:13:54.640 --> 0:13:57.320
<v Speaker 2>it was just back road. So since we moved out

0:13:57.360 --> 0:13:59.760
<v Speaker 2>a bucket, I don't have to get in Atlanta highway

0:13:59.760 --> 0:14:03.800
<v Speaker 2>trap much. But you know I'm gonna I'm gonna zipper

0:14:03.800 --> 0:14:04.840
<v Speaker 2>merge from here on out.

0:14:04.960 --> 0:14:07.200
<v Speaker 1>Me too, buddy. And we should also say, I don't

0:14:07.200 --> 0:14:08.520
<v Speaker 1>know if we said the reason why they call it

0:14:08.600 --> 0:14:12.040
<v Speaker 1>zipper merges. If you look overhead at that merge point,

0:14:12.040 --> 0:14:14.640
<v Speaker 1>it looks like the cars are zipping up, and one

0:14:14.679 --> 0:14:17.000
<v Speaker 1>of the orange construction cones looks like the tip of

0:14:17.040 --> 0:14:18.480
<v Speaker 1>a penis caught in the zipper.

0:14:20.600 --> 0:14:21.040
<v Speaker 2>Is that short?

0:14:21.080 --> 0:14:21.520
<v Speaker 3>Stuff out?

0:14:22.120 --> 0:14:22.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

0:14:26.200 --> 0:14:29.080
<v Speaker 2>Stuff you should know is a production of iHeartRadio. For

0:14:29.160 --> 0:14:33.320
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0:14:33.440 --> 0:14:35.280
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