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Speaker 1: Hi.

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Speaker 2: I'm Laura Vanderkamp. I'm a mother of five, an author, journalist,

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Speaker 2: and speaker.

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Speaker 3: And I'm Sarah hart Hunger, a mother of three, practicing physician, writer,

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Speaker 3: and course creator. We are two working parents who love

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Speaker 3: our careers and our families.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to best of both worlds. Here we talk about

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Speaker 2: how real women manage work, family, and time for fun,

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Speaker 2: from figuring out childcare to mapping out long term career goals.

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Speaker 2: We want you to get the most out of life.

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Speaker 1: Welcome to best of both worlds. This is Laura.

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Speaker 2: This episode is airing in mid to late August, not

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Speaker 2: right before Labor Day, but getting close on there. This

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Speaker 2: episode is going to be our long Weekend Little Kid

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Speaker 2: Survival Guide.

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Speaker 1: Why did we want to do this episode?

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Speaker 2: Well, long weekends our thought of is usually being relaxing,

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Speaker 2: but that is from the perspective of people who do

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Speaker 2: not have young children in their care over this longer

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Speaker 2: period of time when everyone is off their usual routines.

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Speaker 2: And I was thinking about this over July fourth weekend,

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Speaker 2: which is kind of the last long weekend that people experienced.

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Speaker 2: My kids aren't even that little anymore, but we were off,

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Speaker 2: so to speak, with childcare perspective since Tuesday at five pm.

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Speaker 2: And I remember at the end of Thursday thinking, wow,

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Speaker 2: it's not even the real weekend weekend yet. And yet

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Speaker 2: there has been a whole weekend of time between Tuesday

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Speaker 2: at five pm and the end of Thursday, and we

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Speaker 2: had three more days to go at that point. If

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Speaker 2: you do have little kids, this is just a note

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Speaker 2: of solidarity. People talk about how relaxed they are, and

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Speaker 2: long weekends with little kids are just not relaxing, right.

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Speaker 3: Sarah, Absolutely. I mean that feeling when everybody at work

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Speaker 3: is like, Oh, I can't wait to just relax, and

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Speaker 3: I have these plans and I'm going to do this

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Speaker 3: and that, and then thinking like, I have a two

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Speaker 3: year old and I have to fill up so many hours.

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Speaker 3: And for us, I'm not sure I have a specific

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Speaker 3: nightmare weekend to share, but let me just say that

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Speaker 3: many times when there are three day weekends, one of

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Speaker 3: us is on call, usually more often my husband on call,

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Speaker 3: because he takes more call than I am. So I

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Speaker 3: have the double whammy of like, yes, I'm hanging out

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Speaker 3: with kids during an extended period of time, but also

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Speaker 3: I'm doing it on my own. I know I'm not

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Speaker 3: the only one in that scenario, and some people do

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Speaker 3: that all the time, which is incredibly hard. But let

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Speaker 3: me just say, if I have like a three day

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Speaker 3: weekend coming up, even now with my kids being a

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Speaker 3: lot older, I'm not that excited about it when I'm

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Speaker 3: going to be doing it all on my own, And

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Speaker 3: we'll talk about strategies that I often employ to make

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Speaker 3: things better. So for me, the most difficult ones have

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Speaker 3: been the long weekends that also happen to be solo

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Speaker 3: parenting endeavors.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and this episode, as we give you our solidarity

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Speaker 2: shout out for people who are planning long weekends with

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Speaker 2: little kids, we will also want to say that there

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Speaker 2: are ways to make them more manageable. Right that we

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Speaker 2: always think with best of both worlds that we can

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Speaker 2: come up with practical solutions that even if you know

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Speaker 2: it is a tough situation, like, there's no reason to

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Speaker 2: be miserable more than one might need to, because there's

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Speaker 2: lots of ways to at least have some fun, get

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Speaker 2: some time for you, hopefully make some memories, even if

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Speaker 2: you do have little ones and are filling a lot

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Speaker 2: of time. So the first part, we have kind of

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Speaker 2: a lot of different strategies here. But the first strategy

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Speaker 2: is to know that the long weekend is coming right, like,

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Speaker 2: don't get blind sided. So especially if your office, you know,

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Speaker 2: isn't closed as many hours as school or daycare might be,

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Speaker 2: you might need to make arrangements. But whenever the school

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Speaker 2: calendar is posted, you want to make sure that you

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Speaker 2: are getting whatever half days are coming up, what other

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Speaker 2: random teacher in service days, whatever days they happen to

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Speaker 2: be off for conferences, that you have those on your calendar.

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Speaker 2: Know about all your daycare closures, I know, make sure

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Speaker 2: if you have a nanny or regular babysitter, you know

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Speaker 2: what their vacation days are. And so when these things

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Speaker 2: are coming up, right, Sarah, you're gonna have two schools

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Speaker 2: worth of random days now.

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Speaker 3: Oh yes, and they all coincide, just kidding, like none

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Speaker 3: of them do it. So I would like to reiterate

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Speaker 3: that our very first tip is to plan. Yay, that

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Speaker 3: is our tip because it's so true, like knowing that

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Speaker 3: this three day weekend, whether it is because of a

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Speaker 3: holiday that you celebrate, a holiday that you don't celebrate,

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Speaker 3: or just a random school teacher planning day, is going

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Speaker 3: to go better if you have time to think about

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Speaker 3: what you want to do with those hours in advance.

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Speaker 3: And I have failed on this on occasion and kind

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Speaker 3: of learned the hard way when I'm like, oh, you know,

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Speaker 3: we'll just like stay home and do whatever, and when

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Speaker 3: you have toddlers, like I again, like we're trying to

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Speaker 3: avoid misery, and that has been That has been sort

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Speaker 3: of the low lights of my longer weekends. The best

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Speaker 3: ones happen when I've really taken the time to think

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Speaker 3: about what could we do to make this more fun?

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Speaker 3: Because often you will be able to come up with

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Speaker 3: some stuff and we'll talk about the specifics of that

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Speaker 3: in a second, but really it's true. The awareness means

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Speaker 3: a lot and is such an important first step here.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I feel like we have this discussion

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Speaker 2: about Christmas every year, Like wait, I have like two

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Speaker 2: weeks I have to cover or something like that. And

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Speaker 2: the earlier one knows that that is coming up, the

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Speaker 2: more mental time spread out over a longer period of time,

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Speaker 2: you can sort of devote to making sure that it

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Speaker 2: is more enjoyable. So first, know that they are coming up. Second,

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Speaker 2: this is the official make a plan one.

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Speaker 3: Right, yes, like actually put something in writing to actually

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Speaker 3: think through those actual hours and what you might want

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Speaker 3: to do with that. Now, your strategy has to do

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Speaker 3: with like having some anchor events. Can you talk about that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, So, I when I'm planning out weekend or vacations

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Speaker 2: or anything like this, I think of each day as

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Speaker 2: having one anchor event, and that is something that you

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Speaker 2: say like, oh, like, well, what are we doing this day?

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Speaker 2: And it doesn't mean that that's the only thing you

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Speaker 2: do that day, but that's kind of what the day

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Speaker 2: is built around.

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Speaker 1: So for instance, I mean.

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Speaker 2: Especially if you have little kids toddlers, it's almost always

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Speaker 2: better to do this in the morning, right, So get ready,

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Speaker 2: get up, go somewhere as soon as the children's museum opens,

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Speaker 2: or the zoom opens, or if you're going to visit

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Speaker 2: friends or something like that, go to the science museum.

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Speaker 2: But choose something that gets you out of the house

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Speaker 2: that you go do it, get the kids to have

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Speaker 2: ideally something that you don't find terrible as well, look

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Speaker 2: at the weather.

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Speaker 1: Plan it in. It's good to have kind of a

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Speaker 1: local bucket list of this sort.

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Speaker 2: Of thing, so if you know wherever you happen to live,

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Speaker 2: sometimes people just wind up going to the same thing

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Speaker 2: over and over again because it's there, and it's hard

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Speaker 2: to think of things when you're taking care of little kids.

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Speaker 2: But it might behoove you at some point to make

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Speaker 2: a local bucket list, like things that are within an

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Speaker 2: hour of you that your family or at least a

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Speaker 2: majority of members of your family find reasonably enjoyable, so

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Speaker 2: that you can pull from that list when you're planning

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Speaker 2: out your long weekend, as opposed to just sit in

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Speaker 2: and be like, jeez, what is there to do? There's

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Speaker 2: nothing to do. I don't know what do we want

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Speaker 2: to do?

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Speaker 3: So yeah, knowing what that is ahead of time, one

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Speaker 3: hundred percent agree with the getting out of the house piece,

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Speaker 3: especially when kids are really little, because let's all be real,

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Speaker 3: what do the kids do in the house? They destroy that? Well,

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Speaker 3: my kids maybe not your kids, but my kids just

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Speaker 3: find stuff to like wreck, especially when they were younger,

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Speaker 3: sometimes still now, and they get bored and they get

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Speaker 3: antsy and they want screens, and like, do I want

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Speaker 3: to give it to them at ten in the morning,

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Speaker 3: Probably not, because I'd rather relax later, And you get

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Speaker 3: what I'm saying. So knowing ahead of time, like we're

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Speaker 3: going to one, we might as well give some concrete examples,

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Speaker 3: because you know, why not this might spark your ideas

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Speaker 3: the zoo a different smaller zoo, to a children's museum,

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Speaker 3: to the science museum, to the cool art place where

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Speaker 3: you spatter paint all over the place, to the paint

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Speaker 3: your own pottery place, to the bouncy house, whatever, you know,

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Speaker 3: just somewhere something. And bonus points if it is something

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Speaker 3: where you can do it recurrently and subscribe, like be

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Speaker 3: a member, because then you can kind of go in

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Speaker 3: a very low pressure way and just be like we're

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Speaker 3: going for a couple of hours and at least we're

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Speaker 3: out of the house. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: And again, if it's someplace that you personally don't mind

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Speaker 2: that much, that is always a benefit. I mean, I've

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Speaker 2: we've gone a lot to Longwood Gardens, which is a

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Speaker 2: little bit of a drive for us. But again, if

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Speaker 2: you're doing this in the morning, maybe you've got more

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Speaker 2: energy for it. But the flowers are pretty. And then

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Speaker 2: they have a children's area that the kids have wound

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Speaker 2: up in a lot. We have a ton of photos

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Speaker 2: of our kids at various different ages in this children's

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Speaker 2: garden that's inside the green house and has various things

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Speaker 2: that they can do, but you know it's something I like,

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Speaker 2: but then they don't hate it either, So I think

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Speaker 2: figuring out if you can hit both of.

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Speaker 3: Those is good for me. The best way to make

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Speaker 3: one of those community outings more fun is to find

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Speaker 3: a friend to go with me. So that's like another

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Speaker 3: really helpful thing. You're probably not the only one facing

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Speaker 3: the labor day doldrums. And the best is when I

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Speaker 3: can find somebody else who also has to solo parent

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Speaker 3: fairly frequently, because then it's like woo, Like we want companionship,

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Speaker 3: we want to hang out together, but it's maybe just

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Speaker 3: us and our kids. And how fun it is if

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Speaker 3: we can actually have a conversation and catch up while

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Speaker 3: our kids are running around. So even more fun for

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Speaker 3: me if you can also maybe turn that into a

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Speaker 3: social event, and that requires planning, Like people aren't going

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Speaker 3: to be free like when you ask them that morning

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Speaker 3: most likely, but even a week before to be like, hey,

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Speaker 3: it's this holiday and we're not going anywhere. Want to

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Speaker 3: meet up at the whatever museum at ten am on Saturday?

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Speaker 1: Done?

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Speaker 2: Absolutely, We're going to take a quick ad break and

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Speaker 2: then we'll be back talking a little bit more about

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Speaker 2: the structure of a long weekend planned. Well, we are

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Speaker 2: back with our long weekend little Kid Survival Guide. We

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Speaker 2: strongly suggested getting out of the house in the morning

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Speaker 2: with your little ones to go do something in the zoo,

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Speaker 2: the park, the children's museum, whatever it is. You probably

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Speaker 2: then want to come home for lunch in a mid

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Speaker 2: afternoon downtime or nap for little ones. So this is

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Speaker 2: a great time for obviously the youngest ones to have

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Speaker 2: their rest or quiet time, for the older kids to

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Speaker 2: read or have some screen time, and then the supervising

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Speaker 2: adult can have a little bit of leisure time for

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Speaker 2: themselves as well. People are told to stay in their

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Speaker 2: rooms under severe penalty for coming out or something like that,

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Speaker 2: only at emergencies. You play your cards right. Ideally you

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Speaker 2: can get two hours or so to chill, right.

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Speaker 3: Sarah, Yes, I mean it is hard when they're in

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Speaker 3: that post napping year. Maybe the older sibling doesn't nap

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Speaker 3: and then the younger one does. But figuring out a

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Speaker 3: way that everybody can just Usually if you've done something

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Speaker 3: active in the morning, this is easier because everyone is

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Speaker 3: more ready to just kind of chill and rest.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and then make sure you have something for that

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Speaker 2: post nap slot. I think this is you know, what

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Speaker 2: separates the newbies from the veteran parents. But you know,

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Speaker 2: the kid gets up from the nap three three thirty,

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Speaker 2: it's like, well, you know, all this, all the normal

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Speaker 2: stuff is closing at five, so it's kind of a

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Speaker 2: pain to get there. Or oh it's kind of like

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Speaker 2: maybe they slept a little later. I don't really feel

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Speaker 2: like doing anything. But then you're stuck there from like

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Speaker 2: four to five thirty as people are melting down, and

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Speaker 2: it feels like you're counting minutes till everyone can be

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Speaker 2: in bed or something like that. And we don't want

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Speaker 2: to wish time away, So figure out something some intention

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Speaker 2: for that post nap slid. Doesn't have to be intense,

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Speaker 2: but something.

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Speaker 3: Like go to a playground, right, Yeah, I feel like

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Speaker 3: this is a time or at least for us, this

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Speaker 3: is like the really low key piece, Like the morning

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Speaker 3: thing is like the big anchor, but the post is

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Speaker 3: just like I mean, it doesn't for us even always

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Speaker 3: have to be leaving the house, but this is when

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Speaker 3: you whip out that activity from the garage that they

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Speaker 3: you know, haven't seen, or go for a walk around

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Speaker 3: the block or just like knock on the door of

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Speaker 3: a neighbor's house and say hi, like the it doesn't

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Speaker 3: low bar, but like something something.

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Speaker 2: Right because then when they've got something to distract them

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Speaker 2: from melting down until it's dinner, and then it's after dinner,

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Speaker 2: it's kind of like sliding into bedtime bathtime anyway, So

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Speaker 2: it's worth figuring out or a low key playdate, especially

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Speaker 2: if you have someone who doesn't mind a little bit

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Speaker 2: of flexibility on when it starts. So if the baby

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Speaker 2: wakes up at three versus three thirty, you know, it's

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Speaker 2: all good that you can go to that.

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Speaker 1: Or again, if you do have.

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Speaker 2: A membership somewhere that's close by, even if it does

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Speaker 2: close at five, it's fine to go at four and

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Speaker 2: just stay for an hour because it's you remember, you

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Speaker 2: don't have to pay to go in.

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Speaker 3: The member thing with kids is like the best anyway,

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Speaker 3: just because kids are so unpredictable and it just takes

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Speaker 3: the pressure off of every outing having to be awesome.

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Speaker 3: Like and also like if there has to be some

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Speaker 3: situation where a kid does something where you're like, well,

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Speaker 3: the consequences we have to leave, you can feel great

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Speaker 3: about that. If you're a member because you can come back.

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Speaker 3: You didn't waste your money then, right, Yeah, no, totally true.

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Speaker 3: The third suggestion and remember the first to be aware

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Speaker 3: of when these long weekends are happening, because they don't

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Speaker 3: always perfectly match up with holidays that we normally think of. Second,

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Speaker 3: have a good plan for something in the morning as

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Speaker 3: an ancor event, downtime, early afternoon post nap slot. Third,

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Speaker 3: plan in something fun for you. So we want to

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Speaker 3: get a break somehow.

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Speaker 2: So that it doesn't feel like all, you know, you

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Speaker 2: have your work work during your regular time and now

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Speaker 2: you have your family care work. You want to have

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Speaker 2: something that's at least moderately fun for you. We just

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Speaker 2: had a whole episode about trading off, so that's always

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Speaker 2: a good idea.

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Speaker 3: Trading off is awesome. Or this was actually when I

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Speaker 3: think I was best about hiring a babysitter for short stints.

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Speaker 3: If Josh had a call weekend that was like over

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Speaker 3: a three day weekend and my kids were little to

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Speaker 3: the point where like I really couldn't ever just like

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Speaker 3: zone out and let them do their own thing, I

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Speaker 3: would be like, okay, fine, I'm getting a babysitter for

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Speaker 3: three or four hours. It didn't feel like a huge expense,

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Speaker 3: but it felt like enough of a luxury. And I

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Speaker 3: used to like use that time to go to bar

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Speaker 3: class back in the day when we lived in Miami Beach.

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Speaker 3: So I agree like having one little treat in there.

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Speaker 3: It doesn't have to be something huge. I don't even

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Speaker 3: know that it has to be every single day, but

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Speaker 3: like something that you're looking forward to that's just for you. Obviously,

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Speaker 3: if your partner is not working on call and in

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Speaker 3: the hospital, then this can be accomplished via trading off,

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Speaker 3: like we talked about recently.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, and one way to think about this

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Speaker 2: is that you look at when each of you is

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Speaker 2: going to want to do your particular forms of exercise,

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Speaker 2: right that that's a very easy thing for each person

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Speaker 2: to trade off and say, Okay, this person is going

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Speaker 2: to do a run on Saturday morning and this one's

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Speaker 2: going to do a run on Sunday morning, and so

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Speaker 2: you both explicitly agree that you are trading off for

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Speaker 2: that time. But you know, little things you can do,

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Speaker 2: like even a post bedtime sort of treat for yourself

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Speaker 2: as you're thinking about your daily After I get the

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Speaker 2: kids into bed, I want to watch this show, which

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Speaker 2: is a favorite show of mine. Or I want to

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Speaker 2: take a bubble bath. People always have these nice bathtubs

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Speaker 2: in the primary bedroom bathroom and then they.

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Speaker 1: Never use them.

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Speaker 2: So you know, if you have built this nice bathtub,

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Speaker 2: you should use it. Maybe it's having a glass of

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Speaker 2: something festive on your porch if the weather is nice.

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Speaker 2: Maybe it's that you got a new magazine in the mail.

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Speaker 2: I'm a big fan of magazine subscriptions because that's something

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Speaker 2: that you can do at home for entertainment, reading edition

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Speaker 2: of a magazine as it comes out. But that might

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Speaker 2: be fun. Or maybe it's a new book or a

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Speaker 2: new puzzle or something like that. Sarah, what are your

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Speaker 2: favorite kind of I know you go to bed pretty

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Speaker 2: soon after your kids go to bed, but what were

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Speaker 2: your favorite sort of naptime treats?

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Speaker 3: Oh? I mean usually just reading, Like I love to

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Speaker 3: get my lovely livery hold whatever it is, or that

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Speaker 3: I'm like reading, or some other kind of book that

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Speaker 3: I have and just relaxed, lay on the couch, maybe

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Speaker 3: have a nice snack. But I was going to say that, like,

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Speaker 3: my like favorite source of fun on a three day

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Speaker 3: weekend is also just having a date night for those nights.

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Speaker 3: I mean, sometimes you need a break in the middle.

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Speaker 3: So Sunday night can be awesome for this, Like normally

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Speaker 3: a night that we wouldn't typically go out because thinking

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Speaker 3: about early wake up's Monday morning. But how awesome if

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Speaker 3: Monday is a day off to have that the night

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Speaker 3: be to get a babysitter and kind of like celebrate

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Speaker 3: the middle of the week, getting through the middle and getting.

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Speaker 1: Through the middle.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, which is again another reason to know that these

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Speaker 2: weekends are coming up in advance, because then you can

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Speaker 2: text whatever sitters you have to see which of them

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Speaker 2: is not traveling over a long weekend and might be

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Speaker 2: interested in coming for a few hours. And having that

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Speaker 2: and knowing you can look forward to that can often

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Speaker 2: be the difference between being like, oh, geez, this is

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Speaker 2: a lot of time versus, hey, we've got a lot

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Speaker 2: of you know, I'm going to the zoo and I'm

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Speaker 2: going out for an adult dinner, So I have a

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Speaker 2: little bit more energy for this zoo in the morning

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Speaker 2: because I'm also knowing that I'm going to be having

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Speaker 2: my margarita and guacamole at night or something like that.

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Speaker 3: Yes, like a little kid free conversation break can be amazing.

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Speaker 2: Yes, exactly, And make sure you acknowledge when this cool

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Speaker 2: thing is happening, like if you have built in a

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Speaker 2: little bit of a treat. It's helpful just to have

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Speaker 2: that mental narrative of like, oh, look, yes it's a

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Speaker 2: long weekend with little kids, but I got to go

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Speaker 2: on this nice run in the cool morning hours in

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Speaker 2: a pretty place. Or yes, it's a long weekend with

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Speaker 2: little kids and there's been a lot of meltdowns and

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Speaker 2: things like that, but I got to go out for

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Speaker 2: coffee with a friend. Or I got to read the

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Speaker 2: new whatever you read Southern Living. H you had a

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Speaker 2: brand novel, Yeah, the new Ellen Hill and Brand lovel

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Speaker 2: at night after an hour after my.

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Speaker 1: Kids went to bed.

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Speaker 2: So acknowledge that it might even help to like list it,

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Speaker 2: because you know, a lot of time is just our

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Speaker 2: mental model of it anyway. And so when we see

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Speaker 2: these good things along, you know, side the fact that

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Speaker 2: your kid had a diaper blowout in the children's museum

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Speaker 2: while you were there, you know, it makes makes the

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Speaker 2: weekend feel a little bit better in general.

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Speaker 3: Absolutely so.

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Speaker 2: Our fourth principle for our long weekend Little Survival Guide,

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Speaker 2: Little Kid Survival guide is that screen time is not evil. Now,

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Speaker 2: of course, we all would like to not have the

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Speaker 2: kids zone out for say, seventy two straight hours on screens,

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Speaker 2: but that's probably not happening anyway. If you're the sort

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Speaker 2: of conscientious person who is listening to a podcast about

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Speaker 2: planning your long weekends, you're probably putting things like going

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Speaker 2: to the children's museum and the zoo and the aquarium

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Speaker 2: and the playdate in there anyway, So they're not going

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Speaker 2: to be on all the time, which means that if

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Speaker 2: they are on during some of the downtime, it's fine.

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Speaker 1: Which I mean, at what age did your kids start

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Speaker 1: being reasonably entertained by screen?

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Speaker 3: Sarah? I think Genevieve was like the earliest because she

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Speaker 3: had the earliest opportunity to do.

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Speaker 1: So because she's the youngest kid.

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Speaker 3: Usually does the youngest kid and a COVID toddler like,

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Speaker 3: so it was like, well, get used to it, child,

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Speaker 3: and still today like I'll be impressed. Like she was

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Speaker 3: watching some Spider Man that I have trouble following the plot,

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Speaker 3: and Cameron's like is loving it and she's like watching

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Speaker 3: it really into it, So I don't know, maybe I

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Speaker 3: shouldn't this kind of stuff, but yeah, she'll do fairly

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Speaker 3: sophisticated stuff. And I feel like it started around age

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Speaker 3: two wish maybe, yeah.

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Speaker 2: It was three, three, three and a half. I mean

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Speaker 2: it was interesting to me. We took a road trip

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Speaker 2: up to Cape cod when Henry was about three and

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Speaker 2: a half last year, and I remember that being kind

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Speaker 2: of hard to keep him entertain on that trip for

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Speaker 2: long hours in the car, with being very aware of

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Speaker 2: the fact that we were in the car with a

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Speaker 2: little kid for a long period of time. We did

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Speaker 2: the same trip about a year later, maybe thirteen months later,

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Speaker 2: and it was fine. Like he played Minecraft on some

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Speaker 2: device I think may have even been Michael's phone because

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Speaker 2: we didn't have his kindle working or something, but he

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Speaker 2: played it on like for hours in the car. That

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Speaker 2: there's something that like the your ability to focus on

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Speaker 2: an actual game, like just probably the executive function gets

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Speaker 2: there between maybe three and four.

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Speaker 1: So that was an interesting thing to observe.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And I feel like movies like Disney movies can

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Speaker 3: be captivating even earlier, like we definitely I think I

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Speaker 3: sat through like all of Frozen with Annabelle when she

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Speaker 3: was like two. Wow, and that can be a wonderful

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Speaker 3: break when your kid is sitting there wrapped by Elsa

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Speaker 3: and Anna, and I don't know, I don't even feel

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Speaker 3: bad about that kind of screen time, Like it's a movie,

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Speaker 3: it's I don't you know, Like I've read The Anxious

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Speaker 3: Generation too, but it didn't say anything about like watching

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Speaker 3: Little Mermaid being so terrible.

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Speaker 1: Well, I don't know, Little Mermaid might make me anxious.

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Speaker 1: I mean it's kind of a scary bad guy.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, true, bad example to.

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Speaker 1: Know your kid on that.

437
00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:19,119
Speaker 2: But yeah, I mean, and that could be you know,

438
00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:21,480
Speaker 2: a family activity too, Like if there is a new

439
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:24,359
Speaker 2: little kid movie out and your kids are maybe even

440
00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:26,439
Speaker 2: four and up, that's something that you guys could go

441
00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:28,320
Speaker 2: do as a family on a long weekend. They often

442
00:21:28,359 --> 00:21:32,080
Speaker 2: are released over holiday weekends precisely because people are looking

443
00:21:32,119 --> 00:21:35,880
Speaker 2: for stuff to do during that time. But you can

444
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:39,720
Speaker 2: stream anything these days, so thinking in advance of like, well,

445
00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:41,880
Speaker 2: what would be a cool movie for the little kids

446
00:21:41,920 --> 00:21:45,320
Speaker 2: to watch, Maybe even talk it up so they're excited

447
00:21:45,359 --> 00:21:45,840
Speaker 2: about it.

448
00:21:46,680 --> 00:21:47,840
Speaker 1: Wear a costume or something.

449
00:21:47,840 --> 00:21:50,439
Speaker 2: It makes it more of a party with the screen

450
00:21:50,520 --> 00:21:55,760
Speaker 2: time versus just you know, zoning out while watching YouTube kids.

451
00:21:56,760 --> 00:22:00,359
Speaker 3: No, that's a fun idea we I mean for a

452
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:03,240
Speaker 3: long weekend. My approach is just the same as always,

453
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:05,280
Speaker 3: which is like kind of delay it for as long

454
00:22:05,280 --> 00:22:07,439
Speaker 3: as we can in the day. My kids kind of

455
00:22:07,520 --> 00:22:10,000
Speaker 3: know they have to ask for it, and it's generally

456
00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:11,879
Speaker 3: not going to be granted until one or two, like

457
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:14,960
Speaker 3: after lunch. So it's fine, we're out and doing stuff

458
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:16,960
Speaker 3: in the morning, we come in, we have lunch, and

459
00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:19,240
Speaker 3: then we're past the nap stage. But let's say I

460
00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:21,399
Speaker 3: still had a napper. It would be pretty natural for

461
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:23,720
Speaker 3: the napper to be napping and then my older child

462
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:25,840
Speaker 3: maybe watching a movie or doing stuff like playing a

463
00:22:25,880 --> 00:22:26,760
Speaker 3: video game or something like.

464
00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:29,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, and if you don't want it to go to bedtime,

465
00:22:29,600 --> 00:22:31,720
Speaker 2: then at that point, that is again the upside of

466
00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:36,199
Speaker 2: having a post nap activity because people won't just and

467
00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:38,480
Speaker 2: to know what that is in advance, because people won't

468
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:41,159
Speaker 2: just want to stop playing Minecraft at four o'clock to

469
00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:43,679
Speaker 2: go do something. It needs to be that there is

470
00:22:43,720 --> 00:22:46,520
Speaker 2: something arranged that you are stopping to go do, like, oh,

471
00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:49,760
Speaker 2: we're going to go play at Billy's house. Now, that's

472
00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:53,440
Speaker 2: why we're stopping, because in the moment, yeah, nobody's gonna

473
00:22:53,480 --> 00:22:54,000
Speaker 2: want to do that.

474
00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:57,440
Speaker 3: Totally. Yeah, a natural stopping point is great.

475
00:22:58,040 --> 00:22:59,400
Speaker 1: Let's take one more quick ad break.

476
00:22:59,520 --> 00:23:01,880
Speaker 2: We will be back with more on our Long Weekend

477
00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:12,720
Speaker 2: Little Kids Survival Guide.

478
00:23:15,880 --> 00:23:16,680
Speaker 1: So we are back.

479
00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:19,760
Speaker 2: This is our long weekend Little Kid's survival guide. If

480
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:21,840
Speaker 2: you are looking forward to Labor Day, or maybe not

481
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:23,800
Speaker 2: so much looking forward to labor day because it's gonna

482
00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:26,680
Speaker 2: be long for you, these are some tips and strategies

483
00:23:26,760 --> 00:23:30,280
Speaker 2: that can help manage sort of lengthy periods of time

484
00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:33,800
Speaker 2: with little kids. We first were talking about being aware

485
00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:36,520
Speaker 2: that they are coming up. Second, having a plan that

486
00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:38,919
Speaker 2: involves an anchor event each day and something for the

487
00:23:39,080 --> 00:23:43,879
Speaker 2: post nap slot. Third, planning in something fun for you. Fourth,

488
00:23:44,200 --> 00:23:47,280
Speaker 2: recognizing that screen time is an evil, like you can

489
00:23:47,560 --> 00:23:49,560
Speaker 2: put it in in a way that can feel good

490
00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:52,600
Speaker 2: and make life feel sustainable, that the kids won't necessarily

491
00:23:52,600 --> 00:23:55,160
Speaker 2: be zoning out for seventy two hours, but having fun

492
00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:59,240
Speaker 2: with it. And finally, fifth hit the easy button where

493
00:23:59,680 --> 00:24:04,240
Speaker 2: poss So this might be a weekend where you use

494
00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:07,480
Speaker 2: Uber Eats or grub Hub for a meal or two, Sarah,

495
00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:09,919
Speaker 2: is this something that happens in your house? Oh?

496
00:24:10,040 --> 00:24:12,919
Speaker 3: Yes, I use uber each, I use door Dash. I

497
00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:16,320
Speaker 3: am indiscriminate. They are all very helpful sometimes, and this

498
00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:19,560
Speaker 3: is the kind of weekend where I do that, And

499
00:24:19,840 --> 00:24:22,480
Speaker 3: especially when the kids were little, what an amazing thing

500
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:24,560
Speaker 3: it was to be able to do that when we

501
00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:29,879
Speaker 3: needed to, and just I don't know, just making things

502
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:32,600
Speaker 3: like not trying to like do all the laundry and

503
00:24:32,680 --> 00:24:34,399
Speaker 3: keep up with it every second of the day, and

504
00:24:34,520 --> 00:24:37,680
Speaker 3: also speaking of easy, like not expecting the house to

505
00:24:37,720 --> 00:24:41,960
Speaker 3: look awesome all day long, like deciding like, okay, once

506
00:24:42,040 --> 00:24:45,119
Speaker 3: we are at bedtime, I will spend twenty minutes getting

507
00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:47,840
Speaker 3: things to be like reasonable, and that's like all we're

508
00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:50,720
Speaker 3: gonna do. Just keeping those expectations really low, because I

509
00:24:50,760 --> 00:24:54,280
Speaker 3: do feel like, you know, you see these Instagram videos

510
00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:57,000
Speaker 3: of kids playing with a perfectly clear floor and like

511
00:24:57,080 --> 00:25:00,280
Speaker 3: one wooden toy out, And aren't you supposed to run

512
00:25:00,320 --> 00:25:02,520
Speaker 3: around after your children making it look like that all

513
00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:04,880
Speaker 3: the time so they can get their maximum enrichment out

514
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:10,160
Speaker 3: of their Montessori selected playset. Well not at our house.

515
00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:14,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, well it just I mean, the housekeeping can expand

516
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:16,160
Speaker 2: to fill the available time. So if you are trying

517
00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:18,879
Speaker 2: to relax and enjoy yourself over a long weekend and

518
00:25:18,920 --> 00:25:21,520
Speaker 2: you already have the little kids, so the messes are

519
00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:24,080
Speaker 2: being made constantly. I mean, you would be spending all

520
00:25:24,080 --> 00:25:25,600
Speaker 2: your time cleaning it up, so you need to put

521
00:25:25,600 --> 00:25:27,680
Speaker 2: a limit on it, Like don't spend the entire nap

522
00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:32,080
Speaker 2: time cleaning up the house, right, like maybe five ten minutes,

523
00:25:33,080 --> 00:25:34,240
Speaker 2: but do your fun thing.

524
00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:35,919
Speaker 1: First, Like, don't do the cleaning first.

525
00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:38,200
Speaker 2: Go do whatever fun thing you wanted to do during

526
00:25:38,280 --> 00:25:40,880
Speaker 2: nap first, and then maybe do ten minutes of cleaning

527
00:25:41,119 --> 00:25:42,840
Speaker 2: toward the end when it you know, if it's about

528
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:45,280
Speaker 2: ready to be interrupted, because it's fine if the cleaning

529
00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:48,040
Speaker 2: gets interrupted, because the toys aren't just going to come

530
00:25:48,080 --> 00:25:51,840
Speaker 2: out again, right, whereas you will never get that time back.

531
00:25:52,200 --> 00:25:55,760
Speaker 2: Same at night, like put a limit on it, set

532
00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:58,200
Speaker 2: a timer, do not spend more time than that because

533
00:25:58,240 --> 00:26:00,800
Speaker 2: you have a date with your magazine, your bubble bath,

534
00:26:01,240 --> 00:26:05,520
Speaker 2: and you want to enjoy yourself on this. With that,

535
00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:08,080
Speaker 2: I would say, don't assign yourself big house projects. I

536
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:10,399
Speaker 2: mean people often think of like, oh, you know, the

537
00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:12,920
Speaker 2: weekends are where I need to get these big things done.

538
00:26:12,920 --> 00:26:14,639
Speaker 2: We're going to clean out the garage this weekend, Like

539
00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:19,159
Speaker 2: you are not, like you know, just maybe that stuff

540
00:26:19,200 --> 00:26:23,400
Speaker 2: happens after your youngest child is four or five. I mean,

541
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:26,719
Speaker 2: you know, unless you're going to hire professional assistants with

542
00:26:26,960 --> 00:26:29,880
Speaker 2: various things along these lines, like you're just not going

543
00:26:29,920 --> 00:26:32,600
Speaker 2: to personally have time for a lot of the extensive

544
00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:36,639
Speaker 2: Homer projects when your kids are little and if you

545
00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:41,120
Speaker 2: are responsible for them, So that is what it is.

546
00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:42,280
Speaker 1: Just accept it.

547
00:26:43,240 --> 00:26:45,960
Speaker 2: If you're not ordering in for meals, very easy meals

548
00:26:46,240 --> 00:26:48,960
Speaker 2: is also a great idea. Pasta is a meal.

549
00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:51,800
Speaker 3: A lot of good jarred sauces out there. There are

550
00:26:51,800 --> 00:26:54,359
Speaker 3: a lot of good jars and things you can dump

551
00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:56,080
Speaker 3: in a.

552
00:26:56,240 --> 00:26:59,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, so you can get various like Asian type sauces

553
00:26:59,880 --> 00:27:02,000
Speaker 2: to you know, we've been doing like well some people

554
00:27:02,040 --> 00:27:05,119
Speaker 2: like taking masala or you know, rogan josh or you

555
00:27:05,119 --> 00:27:07,000
Speaker 2: could get like tie red curry or.

556
00:27:06,920 --> 00:27:07,640
Speaker 1: Something like that.

557
00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:11,159
Speaker 2: You can get chicken that is pre chopped up, so

558
00:27:11,200 --> 00:27:12,639
Speaker 2: all you have to do is just like put it

559
00:27:12,680 --> 00:27:13,639
Speaker 2: in the pan and cook it.

560
00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:15,440
Speaker 1: Then you mix the sauce.

561
00:27:15,119 --> 00:27:17,720
Speaker 2: In, you do one of those boil in a bag

562
00:27:17,920 --> 00:27:21,919
Speaker 2: things of rice and like you've got a meal and

563
00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:24,760
Speaker 2: maybe heat up some frozen corn and it's even a

564
00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:25,359
Speaker 2: healthy meal.

565
00:27:25,680 --> 00:27:29,440
Speaker 1: So's it's like pretty easy to do some of these things.

566
00:27:29,880 --> 00:27:32,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, you have to maybe be okay with like some repetition,

567
00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:34,440
Speaker 3: But honestly, in that phase of life, I think a

568
00:27:34,440 --> 00:27:37,080
Speaker 3: lot of people would just embrace it like whatever is easy.

569
00:27:37,359 --> 00:27:39,680
Speaker 3: And that's so true about the big projects. I would say,

570
00:27:39,720 --> 00:27:42,119
Speaker 3: any big project or any work project. I mean, I

571
00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:46,520
Speaker 3: enjoy working on the weekends now. When my kids were toddlers,

572
00:27:46,680 --> 00:27:48,760
Speaker 3: I couldn't do much of it because the only time

573
00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:50,800
Speaker 3: would have been either if I was going to like

574
00:27:50,840 --> 00:27:52,880
Speaker 3: have a block of childcare, which on occasion I did,

575
00:27:52,920 --> 00:27:55,560
Speaker 3: but if I didn't, then it would be nap. And

576
00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:56,840
Speaker 3: I don't want to use my nap for that because

577
00:27:56,840 --> 00:27:59,560
Speaker 3: it's such an incredibly limited time that is my only downtime,

578
00:27:59,600 --> 00:28:03,200
Speaker 3: and so so to spend that time like organizing something

579
00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:06,120
Speaker 3: like just doesn't it doesn't make sense and feels kind

580
00:28:06,119 --> 00:28:10,000
Speaker 3: of unsatisfying. So I really do agree, like take the

581
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:13,280
Speaker 3: pressure off, You're gonna feel better about just like leaning

582
00:28:13,320 --> 00:28:16,160
Speaker 3: into it and being where you are versus having these

583
00:28:16,400 --> 00:28:20,200
Speaker 3: lofty aspirations that are just not really possible and then

584
00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:23,399
Speaker 3: feeling guilt about what didn't happen.

585
00:28:23,840 --> 00:28:24,399
Speaker 1: Yeah.

586
00:28:24,440 --> 00:28:27,959
Speaker 2: Absolutely, but then a quick message of hope that it

587
00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:32,040
Speaker 2: gets better. So a message for people, I mean, obviously

588
00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:34,600
Speaker 2: We've both have lots of kids, and so we've been

589
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:37,680
Speaker 2: in the little kid years for a long time, including

590
00:28:37,720 --> 00:28:40,240
Speaker 2: many years well we've had this podcast going. But we're

591
00:28:40,280 --> 00:28:43,560
Speaker 2: starting to kind of age out of it, and I

592
00:28:43,600 --> 00:28:48,000
Speaker 2: have actually started to enjoy my weekends a lot more

593
00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:53,280
Speaker 2: now that it is possible to relax without making prior

594
00:28:53,560 --> 00:28:56,480
Speaker 2: arrangements to relax. I guess is how I would put it.

595
00:28:56,480 --> 00:28:58,600
Speaker 2: It was never impossible to relax. I just have to

596
00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:01,160
Speaker 2: be like, Okay, Mike got the kids now, and now

597
00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:02,960
Speaker 2: is my relaxing time. And then I'll take them and

598
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:04,880
Speaker 2: then it'll be his relaxing time, or we have a

599
00:29:04,920 --> 00:29:08,160
Speaker 2: sitter and now we have the relaxing time. But once

600
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:12,520
Speaker 2: Henry is able to do something like play Minecraft, it

601
00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:16,120
Speaker 2: introduces the possibility that you can in fact sit on

602
00:29:16,160 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 2: the couch with a magazine and if he's absorbed enough

603
00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:21,000
Speaker 2: in it, then you probably won't be called up for

604
00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:24,200
Speaker 2: at least a little while, and you can start to

605
00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:26,640
Speaker 2: do more things, especially now that I have older kids

606
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:29,960
Speaker 2: who can be babysitters, Like if I want to go

607
00:29:30,040 --> 00:29:35,080
Speaker 2: somewhere for forty five minutes, they can, right, And that's fine. Again,

608
00:29:35,160 --> 00:29:38,160
Speaker 2: don't have to make huge prior arrangements to how it happened.

609
00:29:38,280 --> 00:29:41,520
Speaker 1: So it's definitely gotten a lot easier.

610
00:29:42,160 --> 00:29:45,520
Speaker 3: I agree, And there's almost like a subtle realization when

611
00:29:45,560 --> 00:29:48,160
Speaker 3: that shift's like, huh, it's Friday night and I don't

612
00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:52,600
Speaker 3: have like the slight feeling of dread that maybe did

613
00:29:53,480 --> 00:29:56,360
Speaker 3: tend to come on back in the day, and that

614
00:29:56,480 --> 00:30:01,240
Speaker 3: feels really really nice. I will also say it's when

615
00:30:01,280 --> 00:30:05,320
Speaker 3: you don't have to It's like that period of parenting

616
00:30:05,320 --> 00:30:08,720
Speaker 3: that's just absolutely constant reactivity than the less somebody else

617
00:30:08,800 --> 00:30:10,480
Speaker 3: is on your kid. You have to be responsive to

618
00:30:10,480 --> 00:30:14,040
Speaker 3: their needs absolutely immediately. It's pretty long. I mean it's

619
00:30:14,080 --> 00:30:15,600
Speaker 3: like a number of years, Like a two year old's

620
00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:17,600
Speaker 3: not going to wait. But once they get to the

621
00:30:17,640 --> 00:30:19,480
Speaker 3: point where like they can do some things for themselves

622
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:21,320
Speaker 3: and even if you're caring for them, their needs are

623
00:30:21,360 --> 00:30:25,160
Speaker 3: just less urgent. It just becomes so much more relaxing

624
00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:27,840
Speaker 3: and fun, and they are more likely to want to

625
00:30:27,840 --> 00:30:30,680
Speaker 3: do things that I find like legitimately fun and that

626
00:30:30,840 --> 00:30:32,360
Speaker 3: is super cool, like when we want to go to

627
00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:35,120
Speaker 3: movies that are you know, maybe I mean, well, I

628
00:30:35,160 --> 00:30:37,880
Speaker 3: took my five year old to Spartable Me for no.

629
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:39,600
Speaker 3: I mean some might not want to take their younger

630
00:30:39,640 --> 00:30:41,320
Speaker 3: kids to a movie like Barbie, but like we did,

631
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:44,280
Speaker 3: and like I love that movie, Like I legitimately enjoyed

632
00:30:44,280 --> 00:30:47,920
Speaker 3: myself and the kids liked it, and like that's a

633
00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:49,000
Speaker 3: big milestone.

634
00:30:49,440 --> 00:30:50,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, it is.

635
00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:50,479
Speaker 3: It is.

636
00:30:50,520 --> 00:30:51,520
Speaker 1: So it does get better.

637
00:30:51,960 --> 00:30:54,560
Speaker 2: So shout out to anyone who is planning a long

638
00:30:54,600 --> 00:30:55,960
Speaker 2: weekend with little kids.

639
00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:58,280
Speaker 1: We see you solidarity.

640
00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:02,000
Speaker 2: But in a few years it'll be feeling more relaxing,

641
00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:03,760
Speaker 2: and then you can be the one telling your colleagues

642
00:31:03,760 --> 00:31:08,160
Speaker 2: about your relaxing long weekend and providing encouragement to the

643
00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:10,000
Speaker 2: colleagues who have the two year old and who are

644
00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:14,560
Speaker 2: going through it themselves. So this week's question, should I

645
00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:19,680
Speaker 2: buy a minivan? So this listener is expecting kid number

646
00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:22,200
Speaker 2: three and never thought of themselves as a minivan person,

647
00:31:22,280 --> 00:31:26,160
Speaker 2: but you know suburbs and kid number three, So should

648
00:31:26,200 --> 00:31:29,600
Speaker 2: they buy one? Sarah, you resisted the minivan.

649
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:32,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I don't think you need a minivan,

650
00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:36,760
Speaker 3: but I do think it's helpful to have a car

651
00:31:36,760 --> 00:31:40,400
Speaker 3: bigger than I said Dan. So we've been extremely happy

652
00:31:40,520 --> 00:31:43,080
Speaker 3: with a like mid to larger sized suv. We have

653
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:45,600
Speaker 3: a three to row Highlander and actually we have the

654
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:49,280
Speaker 3: hybrid version, so a little bit less gas guzzling. I

655
00:31:49,320 --> 00:31:51,520
Speaker 3: love that car so much. I love driving it. I

656
00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:53,360
Speaker 3: love how my kids fit in it. I love how

657
00:31:53,440 --> 00:31:55,960
Speaker 3: much we can fit in the back. I've never actually

658
00:31:56,040 --> 00:31:58,080
Speaker 3: driven a minivan, to be fair, but like they don't

659
00:31:58,080 --> 00:31:59,880
Speaker 3: look like they be like that fun to drive, and

660
00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:02,760
Speaker 3: I actually enjoy driving the suv. So I don't know, Like,

661
00:32:03,080 --> 00:32:04,640
Speaker 3: I guess i'd just say, you don't have to have

662
00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:08,440
Speaker 3: a minivan, Like I think there are other larger cars

663
00:32:08,440 --> 00:32:11,240
Speaker 3: that do a lot of what a minivan does. But

664
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:13,240
Speaker 3: I know people love their minivan, so it's definitely a

665
00:32:13,280 --> 00:32:14,200
Speaker 3: good option as well.

666
00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:15,640
Speaker 1: Yeah.

667
00:32:15,720 --> 00:32:17,640
Speaker 2: I mean, so when we had kid number three, I

668
00:32:17,680 --> 00:32:20,280
Speaker 2: didn't want to buy a minivan, so I wound up

669
00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:22,960
Speaker 2: with an Accura, which we still have and you know,

670
00:32:23,040 --> 00:32:27,120
Speaker 2: Jasper will mostly be driving it now. Is an suv,

671
00:32:27,360 --> 00:32:29,360
Speaker 2: a three row suv, but it's kind of hard to

672
00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:30,080
Speaker 2: get in the back row.

673
00:32:30,120 --> 00:32:30,840
Speaker 1: It was only for.

674
00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:33,640
Speaker 2: When we had to use it as a seven passenger

675
00:32:33,680 --> 00:32:36,920
Speaker 2: of a person kind of thing. But then when we had Alex,

676
00:32:36,960 --> 00:32:39,360
Speaker 2: it was like, okay, well we need the family minivan

677
00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:42,920
Speaker 2: just to have the ability to have like two car

678
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:46,400
Speaker 2: seats and then two other kids in the car at

679
00:32:46,480 --> 00:32:47,600
Speaker 2: the same time.

680
00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:51,040
Speaker 1: And I gotta say they're pretty cool.

681
00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:53,080
Speaker 2: I mean, now again, I didn't get rid of my

682
00:32:53,120 --> 00:32:55,520
Speaker 2: accurate so I was not the one driving the minivan

683
00:32:55,640 --> 00:32:58,800
Speaker 2: all the time. Our nannies have been the one mostly

684
00:32:58,880 --> 00:33:00,560
Speaker 2: driving it, and then we drive it on weekends or

685
00:33:00,600 --> 00:33:04,000
Speaker 2: family trips or you know, family activities things like that.

686
00:33:04,920 --> 00:33:07,680
Speaker 2: But they're pretty cool, Like there's a reason everyone has that.

687
00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:11,200
Speaker 2: Like I was picking Ruth and a friend of hers

688
00:33:11,320 --> 00:33:12,760
Speaker 2: up at camp the other day and I parked in

689
00:33:12,800 --> 00:33:14,920
Speaker 2: the carking lot and then I walk up to the

690
00:33:14,920 --> 00:33:16,360
Speaker 2: car and I start like pulling on the car, and

691
00:33:16,360 --> 00:33:18,040
Speaker 2: I'm like, why is it opening? Like when I have

692
00:33:18,080 --> 00:33:20,040
Speaker 2: my keys in my pocket, why is this not opening?

693
00:33:20,760 --> 00:33:24,479
Speaker 2: Because it was somebody else's Toyota Siena that was parked

694
00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:30,440
Speaker 2: two down from mine, because everyone else was the Toyota Sienna,

695
00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:31,360
Speaker 2: and the lady.

696
00:33:31,200 --> 00:33:32,000
Speaker 1: Was like right behind me.

697
00:33:32,080 --> 00:33:33,920
Speaker 2: She's like, well, god, she didn't see me, but she

698
00:33:33,960 --> 00:33:35,240
Speaker 2: saw my kid trying to get in the car, and

699
00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:36,800
Speaker 2: she's like, I didn't think I had to take another

700
00:33:36,880 --> 00:33:39,800
Speaker 2: kid home. I mean maybe my daughter inviting somebody else home.

701
00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:40,280
Speaker 1: I don't know.

702
00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:44,440
Speaker 2: So it was just like all fun and games but

703
00:33:45,560 --> 00:33:49,160
Speaker 2: I mean the sliding doors are great because your kids

704
00:33:49,160 --> 00:33:52,880
Speaker 2: cannot hit another car in the parking lot. With a

705
00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:56,760
Speaker 2: sliding door, you can get into the back seat quite easily.

706
00:33:57,760 --> 00:33:59,600
Speaker 2: You can't get around the laws of physics. I mean,

707
00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:02,920
Speaker 2: you still have like this somewhat crunched no matter what

708
00:34:02,920 --> 00:34:05,560
Speaker 2: car you're in. But I feel like minivans feel like

709
00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:10,080
Speaker 2: they are spacious but are not quite as huge as

710
00:34:10,120 --> 00:34:15,719
Speaker 2: some of the bigger three row SUVs, and so with

711
00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:19,080
Speaker 2: that the gas mileage might be slightly better too.

712
00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:20,960
Speaker 1: So you know, I don't know.

713
00:34:21,520 --> 00:34:25,279
Speaker 2: I think you don't have to buy one, but they

714
00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:28,160
Speaker 2: do have their upsides. And you know, if you think

715
00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:30,520
Speaker 2: you might wind up with a fourth kid, it might

716
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:34,720
Speaker 2: be worth going ahead and switching to being a minivan family.

717
00:34:35,360 --> 00:34:37,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, I could see that. And I'll also say that

718
00:34:37,560 --> 00:34:40,160
Speaker 3: you can get away when your kids are little with

719
00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:43,759
Speaker 3: probably not even like an suv like we did have

720
00:34:43,880 --> 00:34:45,920
Speaker 3: I think all three kids in the well. No, we

721
00:34:45,960 --> 00:34:48,359
Speaker 3: did buy the suv and Genevie was born, but we

722
00:34:48,360 --> 00:34:50,600
Speaker 3: were able to fit all three car seats in a

723
00:34:50,640 --> 00:34:53,600
Speaker 3: Toyota Prias. And if you have to do it, you

724
00:34:53,640 --> 00:34:53,920
Speaker 3: do it.

725
00:34:54,520 --> 00:34:56,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, there are some car seats that are designed to

726
00:34:56,480 --> 00:34:59,319
Speaker 2: be a little bit thinner, and so you can fit

727
00:34:59,360 --> 00:35:01,080
Speaker 2: it now. I will point out then that you have

728
00:35:01,160 --> 00:35:03,640
Speaker 2: three children crammed on top of each other in the

729
00:35:03,680 --> 00:35:09,080
Speaker 2: back seat, and if they are not perfectly behaved, they

730
00:35:09,080 --> 00:35:11,840
Speaker 2: may be arguing and fighting and have easy access to

731
00:35:11,920 --> 00:35:13,279
Speaker 2: hit each other in the back seat.

732
00:35:13,400 --> 00:35:15,560
Speaker 1: I'm just throwing that out there as a reason that

733
00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:16,360
Speaker 1: you might wish.

734
00:35:16,239 --> 00:35:19,879
Speaker 3: To have a very theoretical, theoretical possibility.

735
00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:22,520
Speaker 2: I am not saying this would ever happen for us

736
00:35:22,800 --> 00:35:27,239
Speaker 2: or anyone else who is listening to this, but I

737
00:35:27,280 --> 00:35:30,319
Speaker 2: love it. Something to keep in mind, all right. Love

738
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:32,640
Speaker 2: of the week, Sarah, what is your love of the week.

739
00:35:33,360 --> 00:35:37,120
Speaker 3: My love of the week is that we were able

740
00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:40,399
Speaker 3: to get a like I don't know that there were

741
00:35:40,400 --> 00:35:42,759
Speaker 3: really good back to school deals on laptops, and we

742
00:35:42,760 --> 00:35:45,560
Speaker 3: were able to get an Apple laptop for Annabel for like,

743
00:35:45,719 --> 00:35:47,600
Speaker 3: way less than I thought you could get one for.

744
00:35:47,840 --> 00:35:50,640
Speaker 3: So look for the tax free shopping, look for the

745
00:35:50,680 --> 00:35:52,680
Speaker 3: back just if that's the thing in your state. Florida

746
00:35:52,760 --> 00:35:55,280
Speaker 3: has that. Look for the back to school deals because

747
00:35:55,719 --> 00:35:56,680
Speaker 3: that was exciting.

748
00:35:57,160 --> 00:35:57,800
Speaker 1: That was exciting.

749
00:35:57,840 --> 00:35:59,400
Speaker 2: Yeah. No, if it's something you needed to get and

750
00:35:59,440 --> 00:36:02,919
Speaker 2: you get a significant discount, that's always great. I guess

751
00:36:02,960 --> 00:36:05,839
Speaker 2: my love of the week is solo swimming. I'm sure

752
00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:09,160
Speaker 2: I've said this before, but usually when I'm in the pool,

753
00:36:09,200 --> 00:36:11,560
Speaker 2: i am lifeguarding for other folks, So it is really

754
00:36:11,640 --> 00:36:15,319
Speaker 2: kind of nice to just relax. Speaking of the long

755
00:36:15,360 --> 00:36:18,480
Speaker 2: weekend with little kids, to be in the pool without

756
00:36:18,520 --> 00:36:22,080
Speaker 2: that responsibility as a great way to feel the sense

757
00:36:22,120 --> 00:36:25,680
Speaker 2: of bliss long weekend, even if it's just for a

758
00:36:25,719 --> 00:36:28,360
Speaker 2: little bit of time. So this has been best of

759
00:36:28,440 --> 00:36:31,200
Speaker 2: both worlds. This has been our long weekend little Kid's

760
00:36:31,239 --> 00:36:34,680
Speaker 2: Survival Guide, hopefully some strategies that people can use. We

761
00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:36,879
Speaker 2: will be back next week with more on making work

762
00:36:36,880 --> 00:36:37,920
Speaker 2: and life fit together.

763
00:36:39,960 --> 00:36:42,759
Speaker 3: Thanks for listening. You can find me Sarah at the

764
00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:47,719
Speaker 3: shoebox dot com or at the Underscore Shoebox on Instagram.

765
00:36:47,600 --> 00:36:51,520
Speaker 2: And you can find me Laura at Laura vandercam dot com.

766
00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:55,200
Speaker 2: This has been the Best of Both Worlds podcast. Please

767
00:36:55,280 --> 00:36:57,840
Speaker 2: join us next time for more on making work and

768
00:36:57,960 --> 00:37:02,319
Speaker 2: life work together. Out of a Man