1 00:00:16,079 --> 00:00:21,680 Speaker 1: Hey, hey, Hey, I'm back and I'm black and brown. 2 00:00:21,920 --> 00:00:24,319 Speaker 2: Okay, Mandy, Hey, hey to. 3 00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:26,759 Speaker 3: How are you? 4 00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:27,960 Speaker 2: How are you doing? 5 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:29,160 Speaker 3: Uh? 6 00:00:29,600 --> 00:00:31,760 Speaker 2: I'm okay. I have been I feel like kind of 7 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:32,520 Speaker 2: homeless lately. 8 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:34,199 Speaker 3: I was at it. 9 00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:37,800 Speaker 2: I went to a conference in Austin, Texas Wednesday through Friday, 10 00:00:37,800 --> 00:00:40,879 Speaker 2: and then I flew to the A which was a 11 00:00:40,920 --> 00:00:42,599 Speaker 2: secret until I just said it out loud right now. 12 00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:44,080 Speaker 2: You know how when you go to your hometown and 13 00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:46,080 Speaker 2: you live where you work, but you go to your 14 00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:47,800 Speaker 2: hotown and you like, don't tell anyone you're going to 15 00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:50,479 Speaker 2: be there because you don't want to be bombarded. I 16 00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:53,519 Speaker 2: snuck in like a ninja to Atlanta, and then I 17 00:00:53,960 --> 00:00:57,560 Speaker 2: was at my alma mater, University of Georgia, today, where 18 00:00:57,560 --> 00:01:01,040 Speaker 2: I was talking to the kids about business journalist and podcasting, 19 00:01:02,160 --> 00:01:04,399 Speaker 2: which was perfect. I talked all about brown ambition and 20 00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:06,760 Speaker 2: inspired the use. I think I basically told them that 21 00:01:06,880 --> 00:01:09,080 Speaker 2: we can do it. Anybody can do a podcast. So 22 00:01:09,240 --> 00:01:11,640 Speaker 2: I'm in Athens, Georgia now, and I have to head 23 00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:13,360 Speaker 2: back to Atlanta and then I fly back to New 24 00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:15,759 Speaker 2: York tomorrow. And I still don't have a home because 25 00:01:15,800 --> 00:01:18,000 Speaker 2: mine's being ripped apart right now so I feel a 26 00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:18,680 Speaker 2: little funky. 27 00:01:18,800 --> 00:01:21,959 Speaker 1: Well I am saying, I get well, not really, I mean, 28 00:01:22,080 --> 00:01:24,200 Speaker 1: I you know, we haven't even started on the house. 29 00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:26,240 Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm leaving that for now. But I have 30 00:01:26,360 --> 00:01:29,720 Speaker 3: a new niece. Oh really, Yes. 31 00:01:29,720 --> 00:01:33,440 Speaker 1: I'm the twelfth. My sister had our niece. Her name 32 00:01:33,520 --> 00:01:37,160 Speaker 1: is Lily and Lily for short, and she's super adorable, 33 00:01:37,240 --> 00:01:39,640 Speaker 1: full head of hair. So I'm super excited because my sister, 34 00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:42,080 Speaker 1: you know, she and her husband been trying for a 35 00:01:42,080 --> 00:01:42,480 Speaker 1: long time. 36 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:45,959 Speaker 3: So we've got this amazing, beautiful little girl. And so 37 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:48,520 Speaker 3: now we are up next. 38 00:01:48,560 --> 00:01:50,280 Speaker 1: I know I haven't given you guys any update about 39 00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:55,920 Speaker 1: like my child trying journey. So actually today I had 40 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,440 Speaker 1: like I don't want to call it a minor surgery, 41 00:01:58,480 --> 00:02:00,960 Speaker 1: but it's not like like I feel like I've had 42 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:03,080 Speaker 1: it so many times. So what happens is you get 43 00:02:03,080 --> 00:02:05,400 Speaker 1: your fibroids removed, and some people get scar tissue, which 44 00:02:05,400 --> 00:02:05,680 Speaker 1: I did. 45 00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:07,800 Speaker 3: So I had a scar tissue. I had my five 46 00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:08,720 Speaker 3: words removed. 47 00:02:08,639 --> 00:02:13,080 Speaker 1: In January of this year, had scar tissue removed maybe 48 00:02:13,120 --> 00:02:17,160 Speaker 1: a few months after that. Unfortunately, the scar tissue came back. 49 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:21,080 Speaker 1: So apparently, you know how like, let's just say you 50 00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:23,400 Speaker 1: get like a cut on your arm, and like the 51 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:26,440 Speaker 1: skin is like searching for itself, so it like connects together, 52 00:02:27,240 --> 00:02:27,440 Speaker 1: you know. 53 00:02:27,520 --> 00:02:29,400 Speaker 3: And so the same thing happened like in my unus. 54 00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:30,720 Speaker 1: So like the top part of my unius and the 55 00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:32,720 Speaker 1: bottom part of my units are like, hey girl, we're 56 00:02:32,720 --> 00:02:35,760 Speaker 1: both trying to heal. Let's hold hands. So literally it 57 00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:37,919 Speaker 1: was like so they were they were like, oh, you 58 00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:40,400 Speaker 1: got a lot of scar tissue. So I had to 59 00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:42,600 Speaker 1: get it removed a second time. And then they put 60 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:45,080 Speaker 1: something inside me called like a it's. 61 00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:50,680 Speaker 2: A u I DA's pregnancy it is. 62 00:02:50,760 --> 00:02:52,280 Speaker 3: And so but what it does is they did the 63 00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:52,720 Speaker 3: one that they did. 64 00:02:52,880 --> 00:02:55,359 Speaker 1: It's not with the medicine to actually hold open my 65 00:02:55,480 --> 00:02:57,959 Speaker 1: unus as it heeled, so now youg it's almost like 66 00:02:58,000 --> 00:03:00,400 Speaker 1: a stick like a prop you know. And so they 67 00:03:00,520 --> 00:03:02,680 Speaker 1: put that in and so I'm not supposed to get 68 00:03:02,680 --> 00:03:04,720 Speaker 1: pregnant now anyway, I have to basically wait until I 69 00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:05,800 Speaker 1: was healed. 70 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:08,480 Speaker 3: And so they but they put that in. I had 71 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:09,680 Speaker 3: a removal surgery. 72 00:03:09,840 --> 00:03:12,720 Speaker 1: They put it in so that way my my uterus 73 00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:14,760 Speaker 1: would would not try to stick together again, and it 74 00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,760 Speaker 1: went really well. So I went today to the doctor, 75 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:20,120 Speaker 1: which is I think it's called a hisster copy something 76 00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:20,480 Speaker 1: I don't know. 77 00:03:21,919 --> 00:03:24,280 Speaker 3: No, heck nod, yeah, yeh. 78 00:03:24,560 --> 00:03:26,160 Speaker 2: I'm like trying to keep track with what. No, don't 79 00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:27,000 Speaker 2: do that, don't do that. 80 00:03:27,680 --> 00:03:31,240 Speaker 3: I know it's called a hisstorocopy, I think. 81 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:34,760 Speaker 1: So basically, it's basically they go in and remove any 82 00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:38,160 Speaker 1: like remaining scar tissues. So she said she just saw 83 00:03:38,440 --> 00:03:40,120 Speaker 1: just a little bit when she was in there today, 84 00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:43,520 Speaker 1: so she took it left the IUD in because she was. 85 00:03:43,520 --> 00:03:45,600 Speaker 3: Like, you know, you probably just need one more month 86 00:03:45,680 --> 00:03:47,040 Speaker 3: of healing. 87 00:03:47,080 --> 00:03:49,440 Speaker 1: But she's like, honestly, Tippy, you look awesome on the inside, 88 00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:52,400 Speaker 1: so your your uterus is completely clear, it looks healthy, 89 00:03:52,480 --> 00:03:56,480 Speaker 1: and then I'm going to start my IVF process once, 90 00:03:57,760 --> 00:04:00,600 Speaker 1: you know, like after this month basically, So basically, like 91 00:04:00,640 --> 00:04:04,200 Speaker 1: in October November ish, I should start like the process 92 00:04:04,240 --> 00:04:06,640 Speaker 1: which is like I don't know, need don't needle needle, 93 00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:11,720 Speaker 1: take your eggs, you know, fertilize them with Superman's firm, 94 00:04:12,440 --> 00:04:14,280 Speaker 1: you know, hopefully they grow, grow, grow, put them in you. 95 00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:15,840 Speaker 1: So I honestly could be pregnant by the end of 96 00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:19,320 Speaker 1: this year, or it might not take the first cycle. 97 00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:23,000 Speaker 1: So basically every cycle is matched with your cycle so 98 00:04:23,480 --> 00:04:25,800 Speaker 1: you know, the next time my cycle comes is basically 99 00:04:25,839 --> 00:04:27,680 Speaker 1: when I can try. So it can like you know, 100 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:30,039 Speaker 1: like some people right away you know their first cycle 101 00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:32,400 Speaker 1: it takes in yay, and some people it's like three 102 00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:35,120 Speaker 1: or fourt cycles in, so you just never know. 103 00:04:35,279 --> 00:04:36,400 Speaker 3: But I don't know. 104 00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:38,039 Speaker 1: I've got a good feeling. So for those of you 105 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:41,040 Speaker 1: who are listening, like you know, I'm just sharing it 106 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:45,440 Speaker 1: because honestly, I think, I don't know. I feel like 107 00:04:45,520 --> 00:04:48,520 Speaker 1: people think having kids so easy. I know, I thought 108 00:04:48,520 --> 00:04:51,120 Speaker 1: because I just figured, you know, in my thoughting twenties, 109 00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:52,720 Speaker 1: Not that I was a huge stop, not really, but 110 00:04:52,839 --> 00:04:54,400 Speaker 1: I just, you know, definitely was on my mind, like 111 00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:56,920 Speaker 1: don't get pregnant, don't get Yeah, you spend so much 112 00:04:56,960 --> 00:04:59,039 Speaker 1: time not like wanting not to be pregnant, and then 113 00:04:59,080 --> 00:05:01,320 Speaker 1: when you finally shift your mind to how to get pregnant, 114 00:05:01,360 --> 00:05:04,200 Speaker 1: you realize it's not that easy. Yes, And honestly, when 115 00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:06,440 Speaker 1: I tell you, when I share with my girlfriends who 116 00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:10,280 Speaker 1: are like you know, I too, honestly, Mandy, like it 117 00:05:10,279 --> 00:05:13,960 Speaker 1: feels like thirty percent have like a story of how 118 00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:17,520 Speaker 1: they struggled, and I'm just like, well, I didn't realize 119 00:05:17,520 --> 00:05:19,720 Speaker 1: how many women struggle so I just wanted to give 120 00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:22,400 Speaker 1: you guys a head up because honestly, the only thing 121 00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 1: I've been doing since the last time I spoke about it, 122 00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:26,359 Speaker 1: and now it's basically getting scar. 123 00:05:26,240 --> 00:05:29,000 Speaker 3: Tissue removed, healing Haley Haley getting scar tissue. 124 00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:31,200 Speaker 1: So there was no like real you know, there's nothing 125 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:33,880 Speaker 1: I could really do, but just like keel scar tissue. 126 00:05:34,040 --> 00:05:37,200 Speaker 1: And like the surgery that I had today was I mean, 127 00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:39,280 Speaker 1: you're up and about, like honestly, like you know, they 128 00:05:39,320 --> 00:05:41,880 Speaker 1: tell you don't drive. Obviously Superman has to come because 129 00:05:41,920 --> 00:05:44,159 Speaker 1: you know, they put you under, but there's no pain 130 00:05:44,279 --> 00:05:46,159 Speaker 1: or anything like that, and then they put you on 131 00:05:46,320 --> 00:05:49,720 Speaker 1: like hormones so like rebuild up your lining. 132 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:50,960 Speaker 3: Since they took some scar tissue. 133 00:05:51,640 --> 00:05:53,919 Speaker 1: But yeah, I'm excited because we could finally actually start 134 00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:57,720 Speaker 1: all this time. It's been a year of prepping Tiffany's uterus, 135 00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:01,240 Speaker 1: you know, and so now finally it's like uterus, girl, 136 00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:02,520 Speaker 1: it's almost. 137 00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:07,279 Speaker 2: Time renovating your uterus exactly, a little fixer upper. 138 00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:13,800 Speaker 3: And now it's like, whoo, finally fix her upper. 139 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:17,599 Speaker 1: Exactly like and then you walk in like, oh my god, 140 00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:21,719 Speaker 1: you this girl cuting here. So I'm excited and plus 141 00:06:21,760 --> 00:06:23,160 Speaker 1: you know, what I really love is that, Like and 142 00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:26,000 Speaker 1: then the fact that like my sister who also you know, 143 00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:29,440 Speaker 1: like it wasn't as easy to get pregnant, is the 144 00:06:29,440 --> 00:06:32,080 Speaker 1: fact that she just had her baby. It's like, you know, 145 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:35,359 Speaker 1: just confirmation of like there is and not saying not 146 00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:38,080 Speaker 1: that because I guess maybe I'm still so early in 147 00:06:38,080 --> 00:06:41,800 Speaker 1: the process because I haven't. We haven't actually tried as 148 00:06:41,839 --> 00:06:43,520 Speaker 1: far as like you know, like with IVF. 149 00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:45,440 Speaker 3: So it's not like I've had this disappointment. It's just 150 00:06:45,440 --> 00:06:48,119 Speaker 3: been prep work. I don't feel like, oh my gosh, 151 00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,160 Speaker 3: it's not gonna happen for me. 152 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:52,360 Speaker 1: I still feel like, yes, next up, baby time, And 153 00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:55,240 Speaker 1: so I guess we'll see, like what you know, Like, 154 00:06:55,520 --> 00:06:56,239 Speaker 1: I am a little. 155 00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:57,280 Speaker 3: Nervous about the IVA process. 156 00:06:57,320 --> 00:06:59,760 Speaker 1: I'm not needle skittish, but from what I hear to 157 00:06:59,800 --> 00:07:01,400 Speaker 1: love out of needles, you know, well. 158 00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:03,760 Speaker 2: Let's talk about it, because don't you have to inject yourself? 159 00:07:04,320 --> 00:07:04,520 Speaker 3: Yeah? 160 00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:08,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, So basically, you like, from what I understand, you 161 00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:10,280 Speaker 1: inject yourself, inject yourself. 162 00:07:10,720 --> 00:07:11,320 Speaker 3: And then. 163 00:07:12,680 --> 00:07:14,600 Speaker 1: Something new like to the doctor was tell me today 164 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:16,480 Speaker 1: but I was loopy off of my my meds and 165 00:07:16,560 --> 00:07:18,560 Speaker 1: she was basically saying something to the effect of like 166 00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:23,120 Speaker 1: first they kind of suppress your your your homeownes a 167 00:07:23,160 --> 00:07:25,320 Speaker 1: little bit, and then they give you something to kind 168 00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:27,840 Speaker 1: of boost them, so that way you have really good, 169 00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:31,320 Speaker 1: strong eggs that are all mature at the same time. 170 00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:34,200 Speaker 1: And then they harvest them and take you know, they're hoping. 171 00:07:34,680 --> 00:07:37,880 Speaker 1: So let's just say you're you know, you are an 172 00:07:37,880 --> 00:07:40,800 Speaker 1: egg and making machine, and they could take twelve of them. 173 00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:42,800 Speaker 1: That would be twelve healthy egg that would be awesome. 174 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:45,600 Speaker 1: But some people they can only get one or two, right, 175 00:07:45,720 --> 00:07:47,680 Speaker 1: and so you just never know, like you know what 176 00:07:47,880 --> 00:07:49,960 Speaker 1: you're like, what you're gonna do, what you're gonna be, 177 00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:50,160 Speaker 1: you know. 178 00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:52,640 Speaker 3: So if they take say like three or four, I'm 179 00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:54,440 Speaker 3: somewhere in the average. They'll take the. 180 00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:58,960 Speaker 1: Three or four, they'll get a sample from Superman, and 181 00:07:59,120 --> 00:08:01,640 Speaker 1: they will fertilize the eggs and basically watch them, she said, 182 00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:04,960 Speaker 1: for five days to see which eggs which Well, by 183 00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:07,240 Speaker 1: then they'll be not fetuses. What's the thing before the 184 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:11,080 Speaker 1: embryos look at you, Mandy, like, they'll be embryos, and 185 00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:14,320 Speaker 1: they'll see which embryos are growing basically you know which 186 00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:18,520 Speaker 1: ones are healthy. And then when the embryos are like, 187 00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:20,400 Speaker 1: you know, the ones that continue to grow up the 188 00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:22,760 Speaker 1: five days, that's the ones that are most likely to 189 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:26,000 Speaker 1: make it. We opted for the second level, which is 190 00:08:26,080 --> 00:08:29,600 Speaker 1: to get them tested chromozonally. 191 00:08:30,120 --> 00:08:31,920 Speaker 2: The don't want to make sure abnormalities. 192 00:08:32,280 --> 00:08:33,720 Speaker 3: Yeah, so that's extra. 193 00:08:33,840 --> 00:08:36,720 Speaker 1: So I'm fortunate in that because of the man works 194 00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:40,000 Speaker 1: for the city, his insurance. Honestly, Mandy paid for like 195 00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:42,320 Speaker 1: every penny. I think I paid ten dollars to go 196 00:08:42,360 --> 00:08:44,040 Speaker 1: see the doctors, you know, of. 197 00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:47,480 Speaker 2: All the treatments too, like the are Oh that's amazing. 198 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:50,360 Speaker 1: Honestly, I don't know that we would be able to 199 00:08:50,400 --> 00:08:53,320 Speaker 1: do this without that. So one of his coworkers did this, 200 00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:57,280 Speaker 1: and she his wife has twins and so and yeah, 201 00:08:57,320 --> 00:09:01,120 Speaker 1: they pay for everything, the treatment before after, like all 202 00:09:01,160 --> 00:09:03,199 Speaker 1: of these like clean up surgeries, all of that has 203 00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:07,080 Speaker 1: been paid for. And so yeah, so the one thing 204 00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:09,719 Speaker 1: that they didn't pay for, which we're gonna pay for. 205 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:13,480 Speaker 1: It's like, I think it's two thousand dollars, but I 206 00:09:13,559 --> 00:09:18,080 Speaker 1: want to get the embryos tested chromosonally to make sure that, 207 00:09:18,280 --> 00:09:20,960 Speaker 1: you know, like to test for things that you know, 208 00:09:21,080 --> 00:09:22,959 Speaker 1: like it would just make it really hard to raise, 209 00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:26,360 Speaker 1: you know, a baby afflicted with those things and so 210 00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:29,280 Speaker 1: we'll get tested for those and then choose the healthiest 211 00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:33,240 Speaker 1: embryo and then the other ones that are also healthy. 212 00:09:33,280 --> 00:09:36,679 Speaker 1: So let's just say chromosonally, they're all fine, and of 213 00:09:36,720 --> 00:09:40,360 Speaker 1: the five, three of them grow you can freeze two 214 00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:43,080 Speaker 1: and then you know, try with the one and then 215 00:09:43,120 --> 00:09:45,720 Speaker 1: if the one doesn't grow and inside you, then they 216 00:09:45,760 --> 00:09:47,640 Speaker 1: can like unthaw another one. 217 00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:50,520 Speaker 3: Here's the thing that's really important is that this. 218 00:09:50,480 --> 00:09:52,320 Speaker 1: I didn't understand the whole thing about freezing your egg 219 00:09:52,400 --> 00:09:54,319 Speaker 1: so because I'm thirty eight, like, let's just say I 220 00:09:54,360 --> 00:09:56,679 Speaker 1: would have frozen my eggs at like thirty three. And 221 00:09:56,760 --> 00:09:59,560 Speaker 1: I really recommend folks really thinking about it, especially women 222 00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:01,839 Speaker 1: who know that they might not have kids until a 223 00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:02,320 Speaker 1: little later. 224 00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:04,640 Speaker 3: When you freeze your eggs, you freeze like. 225 00:10:05,440 --> 00:10:09,000 Speaker 1: The timeframe, like, so any eggs, any embryos that I 226 00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:13,120 Speaker 1: can freeze, now, those are thirty eight year old woman's embryos. 227 00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:16,480 Speaker 1: So if I say, let's just say later at forty two, 228 00:10:16,559 --> 00:10:19,360 Speaker 1: let's just say I have this baby, and at thirty nine, yay, 229 00:10:19,440 --> 00:10:21,800 Speaker 1: the baby comes, and then at forty I'm like, I 230 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:22,520 Speaker 1: want to do it again. 231 00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:25,440 Speaker 3: I don't have to use forty year olds eggs and embryos. 232 00:10:25,480 --> 00:10:27,840 Speaker 1: I can use my thirty eight year old, which you know, 233 00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:30,439 Speaker 1: by definition should be a little bit stronger and healthier. 234 00:10:30,480 --> 00:10:32,360 Speaker 2: You know, so you're gonna do as many as you can. 235 00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:34,880 Speaker 3: Well I guess yeah, whatever, I yeah, I mean who 236 00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:35,840 Speaker 3: I am. 237 00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:38,320 Speaker 1: I only get one healthy embryo, and then that's what 238 00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:40,360 Speaker 1: we work with, you know, you just there's no way 239 00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:45,320 Speaker 1: to tell, quite honestly, and so yeah, so there's just yeah, 240 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:47,360 Speaker 1: it's just such a process because you're just like wow, 241 00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:50,319 Speaker 1: people literally just lay down in bed and they're like, oh. 242 00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:55,120 Speaker 3: Man, and then they have a baby what exactly? 243 00:10:55,120 --> 00:10:57,520 Speaker 1: Literally, And then there are people who are like you 244 00:10:57,640 --> 00:11:00,679 Speaker 1: have to you know, just all of this and it's 245 00:11:00,720 --> 00:11:03,040 Speaker 1: just crazy to me, like how that works out. But 246 00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:04,720 Speaker 1: like I said, I'm feeling really good about it, and 247 00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:07,120 Speaker 1: I you know, one thing that they said too, is 248 00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:10,160 Speaker 1: that some people pick and I don't know that we'll 249 00:11:10,160 --> 00:11:14,120 Speaker 1: do this, but like you can, because we're getting tested chromozonally, 250 00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:17,320 Speaker 1: you can like let's just say like all of them 251 00:11:17,320 --> 00:11:19,400 Speaker 1: are boys, that's one thing. But I'll know the sex 252 00:11:19,440 --> 00:11:22,040 Speaker 1: of the of the baby. But like let's just say 253 00:11:22,040 --> 00:11:23,679 Speaker 1: I had an embryo that's a girl. An embryo that's 254 00:11:23,679 --> 00:11:25,600 Speaker 1: a boy. Both of them are healthy. She said, you 255 00:11:25,640 --> 00:11:27,240 Speaker 1: can pick, and I'm like, I don't know. I probably, 256 00:11:27,480 --> 00:11:29,320 Speaker 1: I don't know. I want to do all that, but 257 00:11:29,800 --> 00:11:32,040 Speaker 1: I'm someone who would want to know ahead of time. 258 00:11:32,240 --> 00:11:34,360 Speaker 1: I might just be like, pick the healthy one. Oh 259 00:11:34,400 --> 00:11:37,520 Speaker 1: it's a boy, great, you know. Yeah, but yeah, if 260 00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:39,040 Speaker 1: you got a chance to pick, would you pick the 261 00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:39,800 Speaker 1: sex of your child? 262 00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:43,480 Speaker 2: It would feel so unnatural to pick the sex of 263 00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:45,439 Speaker 2: a child. I guess, you know what, I would pick 264 00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:47,559 Speaker 2: a girl because I feel like there's lots of societies 265 00:11:47,559 --> 00:11:51,600 Speaker 2: where people purposefully don't have girls because of like social normalis. 266 00:11:51,679 --> 00:11:55,480 Speaker 2: Maybe I'm overthinking it, but uh yeah. 267 00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:57,120 Speaker 3: We talked about it a lot, like what do you think? 268 00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:58,960 Speaker 3: And I was like, honestly, at this point. 269 00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:01,560 Speaker 1: I just really want a healthy baby, and so I 270 00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:03,600 Speaker 1: feel like, I mean that might be out of our hands, 271 00:12:03,679 --> 00:12:05,640 Speaker 1: not the healthy baby part, but there might be. 272 00:12:05,679 --> 00:12:09,360 Speaker 3: We might have three healthy embryos and they're all boys, you. 273 00:12:09,320 --> 00:12:11,560 Speaker 2: Know, I mean, think the best one with the best 274 00:12:11,559 --> 00:12:13,040 Speaker 2: shot of thinking. 275 00:12:13,120 --> 00:12:15,720 Speaker 3: I feel like, yeah, exactly what I said. I'm like, 276 00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:18,280 Speaker 3: I just want like a healthy baby, and you know, 277 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:20,880 Speaker 3: a boy or girl. Although I'm like, lord, like. 278 00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:24,080 Speaker 1: Supergirl, you know, she's she's so much better now, you know. 279 00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:27,080 Speaker 1: She certainly doesn't say Tiffany, Tiffany ain't done the dishes 280 00:12:27,120 --> 00:12:28,480 Speaker 1: in a while. I'm sure she thinks it, but she 281 00:12:28,480 --> 00:12:31,000 Speaker 1: doesn't say. 282 00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:34,839 Speaker 3: So I'm not gonna lie having another girl in the mouth. 283 00:12:34,960 --> 00:12:37,040 Speaker 3: I don't know. But at this point, I just want 284 00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:38,800 Speaker 3: a healthy baby. 285 00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:42,920 Speaker 1: So I'm excited, though a little nervous because I'm like, yikes, 286 00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:45,040 Speaker 1: a baby because whatever, our baby, said my niece and 287 00:12:45,040 --> 00:12:47,600 Speaker 1: my nephew, because my niece is one and my nephew's three. 288 00:12:47,920 --> 00:12:50,800 Speaker 3: My sister looks at me like, you sure you want. 289 00:12:50,679 --> 00:12:54,400 Speaker 2: All me listen, I don't look too closely, Like that's 290 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:57,600 Speaker 2: my philosophy because if you if you overthink it. That's 291 00:12:57,640 --> 00:13:00,079 Speaker 2: the hard part about like doing this, the IVS and 292 00:13:00,120 --> 00:13:03,400 Speaker 2: all that, like adopting even like you're willfully doing this 293 00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:07,240 Speaker 2: to yourself, like you are on purpose having a baby. 294 00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:10,440 Speaker 1: Yes exactly. So I'm just like, yeah, but I mean, 295 00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:12,520 Speaker 1: I know it's not going to be easy. But honestly, 296 00:13:12,679 --> 00:13:14,360 Speaker 1: me and Superman we're just talking the other day. I'm like, 297 00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:18,880 Speaker 1: you know, we're just so blessed, like you know, we 298 00:13:18,880 --> 00:13:21,480 Speaker 1: we've got you know, we're I mean, we have each other. 299 00:13:21,679 --> 00:13:24,320 Speaker 1: You know, I'm thankful that my parents are here still. 300 00:13:24,920 --> 00:13:27,760 Speaker 1: You know, I've got awesome family. My sister's, my niece, 301 00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:30,880 Speaker 1: my nephew, my new niece, and like I get to 302 00:13:30,920 --> 00:13:31,760 Speaker 1: do what I love for. 303 00:13:31,720 --> 00:13:35,120 Speaker 3: A living and you know, make a good amount of 304 00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:35,720 Speaker 3: money doing so. 305 00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:38,840 Speaker 1: But bigger than that, I mean, just it comes down 306 00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:42,960 Speaker 1: to family and love, and I just want to, like, 307 00:13:43,480 --> 00:13:45,199 Speaker 1: you know, expand that. 308 00:13:45,280 --> 00:13:48,280 Speaker 3: You know, I really want to have a baby with Superman. 309 00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:51,600 Speaker 1: He's like such an awesome dad already, the Supergirl and like, 310 00:13:51,760 --> 00:13:55,480 Speaker 1: just like my niece and my nephew, they just love him, honestly, 311 00:13:55,520 --> 00:13:56,199 Speaker 1: all the kids. 312 00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:59,840 Speaker 3: In the neighborhood. He is the black mister Rogers. 313 00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:02,199 Speaker 1: And like, just the other day, I'm telling you, I 314 00:14:02,240 --> 00:14:04,760 Speaker 1: can't come in the house without somebody eating our apple sauce. 315 00:14:05,280 --> 00:14:08,840 Speaker 3: Hey, it's mister Superman. Well they don't call me Superman, 316 00:14:09,080 --> 00:14:11,440 Speaker 3: it's missus Superman a home, you know. And I'm like, no, 317 00:14:12,120 --> 00:14:13,640 Speaker 3: y'all got apple sauce. I'm like, that's. 318 00:14:13,480 --> 00:14:15,679 Speaker 2: Exactly you must have the good You must have the 319 00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:17,600 Speaker 2: good squeeze apple sauce. Everyone loves now. 320 00:14:18,080 --> 00:14:19,720 Speaker 3: No, well no, we all we just we get the 321 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:22,360 Speaker 3: like the little moths cups. Literally, we don't even eat 322 00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:22,880 Speaker 3: apple sauce. 323 00:14:22,880 --> 00:14:25,160 Speaker 1: I think super Girl doesn't even enjoy apple sauce like 324 00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:26,960 Speaker 1: that anymore because she's eleven now, so you know, she 325 00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:28,880 Speaker 1: thinks she's grown in seventh grade, so she's not a 326 00:14:28,880 --> 00:14:31,200 Speaker 1: big apple sauce either. We literally keep it for the 327 00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:33,400 Speaker 1: babies in the back. And now to even know to ask, 328 00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:35,280 Speaker 1: can I have a spoon, I'm like, I spooned to 329 00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:39,280 Speaker 1: we get I get the disposable spoon because god forbid, 330 00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:41,160 Speaker 1: you know, we don't have a spoon to go with 331 00:14:41,240 --> 00:14:41,800 Speaker 1: the apple. 332 00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:43,240 Speaker 3: Sauce that they're confiscated from our home. 333 00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:46,880 Speaker 1: But honestly, he's just like the best, and I just 334 00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:49,560 Speaker 1: like I could just see him, like he's just a 335 00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:52,480 Speaker 1: really good father, and I just know that I want 336 00:14:52,560 --> 00:14:56,000 Speaker 1: to to bring, even though the world is a little crazy, 337 00:14:56,000 --> 00:14:58,280 Speaker 1: a baby into the world with him and raised a baby. 338 00:14:58,280 --> 00:14:59,760 Speaker 3: He's like, Oh, baby's gonna save the world. I'm like 339 00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:01,160 Speaker 3: about all answers, man. 340 00:15:01,360 --> 00:15:05,680 Speaker 1: Probably I just want our baby to be healthy and happy. 341 00:15:06,320 --> 00:15:08,920 Speaker 2: Well, it's nice to hear you're such a like positive love. 342 00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:11,200 Speaker 2: That's the only attitude, Like, the only way to approach 343 00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:13,440 Speaker 2: it right is just to be you know, as open 344 00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:16,240 Speaker 2: minded and positive as you can be, and just surround 345 00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:19,080 Speaker 2: yourself with other people who are positive about baby super 346 00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:23,080 Speaker 2: Budget Nesta and oh I hope it happens. 347 00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:26,040 Speaker 3: Yeah, me too. Yeah, but you know, I'm sure you guys. 348 00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:28,400 Speaker 1: You guys, they hit me up sometimes, like in my mentions, 349 00:15:28,440 --> 00:15:30,640 Speaker 1: like send of your baby raids, or like telling me 350 00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:33,080 Speaker 1: drink some vitamin that's supposed to be like a baby 351 00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:33,720 Speaker 1: making vitamin. 352 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:36,960 Speaker 3: And I'm like, you know, like, I'm like, you know what, 353 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:39,240 Speaker 3: I'm just gonna stick to the doctor's orders right now. 354 00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:43,360 Speaker 2: But thanks man, well, thank you so much for being candid. 355 00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:45,840 Speaker 2: I mean, if you guys, have you put tiff on blast? 356 00:15:45,840 --> 00:15:47,920 Speaker 2: Someone was asking on Twitter, like can we get an 357 00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:51,479 Speaker 2: update on Tiffany's vibroids? 358 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:57,560 Speaker 1: Honestly, and I don't mind, because it's it's it's it's 359 00:15:57,560 --> 00:16:00,000 Speaker 1: something that we don't talk about enough. And I think, 360 00:16:00,240 --> 00:16:03,600 Speaker 1: like you know, and I find that there's so many women, 361 00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:07,880 Speaker 1: even women who've already have kids, so many women, especially 362 00:16:07,880 --> 00:16:10,320 Speaker 1: women of color, brown women, we are afflicted with five 363 00:16:10,360 --> 00:16:13,200 Speaker 1: boards like crazy. Honestly, it's really the reason why I 364 00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:16,520 Speaker 1: went vegan. I mean, because honestly, I love chicken, you know, 365 00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:20,920 Speaker 1: and I went vegan because although they don't know the 366 00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:23,640 Speaker 1: one hundred percent cars of five boards, you know, the 367 00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:26,680 Speaker 1: suspected cause is like you know, hormones and meat and 368 00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:27,160 Speaker 1: stuff like that. 369 00:16:27,160 --> 00:16:28,400 Speaker 3: That that definitely adds to it. 370 00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:29,960 Speaker 1: So I was like, well, what can I do on 371 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:33,240 Speaker 1: my side, like to help with this process? And so 372 00:16:33,280 --> 00:16:34,640 Speaker 1: I'm like, you know, what if I have to give 373 00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:39,080 Speaker 1: up you know, meat, and well dairy was easy because 374 00:16:39,080 --> 00:16:41,600 Speaker 1: I wasn't really having that anyway, then so be it. 375 00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:42,600 Speaker 3: No chicken No. 376 00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:44,840 Speaker 1: I mean I still sneak in like fish here and there, 377 00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:48,720 Speaker 1: but no chicken, no red meat, no turkey, no pork, 378 00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:51,120 Speaker 1: which I don't eat pork anyway, but you know, definitely 379 00:16:51,160 --> 00:16:53,680 Speaker 1: no dairy, and hoping to just because I don't want 380 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:56,160 Speaker 1: them to grow back, you know, because they can, you know, 381 00:16:56,280 --> 00:16:59,000 Speaker 1: just because you got them removed. I know people who 382 00:16:59,360 --> 00:17:01,280 Speaker 1: are having you know, they're young. A friend of mine 383 00:17:01,320 --> 00:17:05,040 Speaker 1: is in her still in her thirties, she already has kids. 384 00:17:05,200 --> 00:17:07,600 Speaker 1: So she's actually getting a hysterectomy to just remove her 385 00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:10,600 Speaker 1: her units altogether because the five words have just taken over, 386 00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:10,960 Speaker 1: you know. 387 00:17:12,920 --> 00:17:14,320 Speaker 3: So yeah, it can be a scary thing. 388 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:16,920 Speaker 2: Well, thanks for talking about it, and you've found them 389 00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:19,480 Speaker 2: through like a routine checkup. 390 00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:21,920 Speaker 3: Right now, I'll tell a story one day once I 391 00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:22,359 Speaker 3: have the baby. 392 00:17:22,359 --> 00:17:23,960 Speaker 1: I'll tell you how I found them because it's pretty 393 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:26,320 Speaker 1: sad and I'm just like, yikes, but I just feel 394 00:17:26,320 --> 00:17:28,240 Speaker 1: like I'm not ready to open up about that part yet. 395 00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:29,919 Speaker 1: But yeah, I found them in a sad way and 396 00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:32,640 Speaker 1: I was just like, well, this sucks, but but yeah, 397 00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:34,359 Speaker 1: so when the baby's here, it'll be a good story. 398 00:17:34,359 --> 00:17:36,480 Speaker 1: And I say that to myself, like I'm gonna it'll 399 00:17:36,520 --> 00:17:38,720 Speaker 1: be a good story to share for those who have 400 00:17:38,760 --> 00:17:39,560 Speaker 1: been through the same thing. 401 00:17:40,119 --> 00:17:41,639 Speaker 2: No, well, based on what you've gone through. And then 402 00:17:41,680 --> 00:17:44,640 Speaker 2: my sister went through her own experience with three productive 403 00:17:44,680 --> 00:17:48,040 Speaker 2: issues this year and I have them kicking myself because 404 00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:49,560 Speaker 2: I need to go to the guyn of collegist and 405 00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:51,240 Speaker 2: get my own checkup. And it's been a while. And 406 00:17:51,359 --> 00:17:53,159 Speaker 2: I feel like, if you're listening and it's been a 407 00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:54,960 Speaker 2: while since you've had a check up at the guyano, 408 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:57,920 Speaker 2: just go and see what see what's there, Because even 409 00:17:57,960 --> 00:17:59,360 Speaker 2: though I may not be planning to have a kid 410 00:17:59,440 --> 00:18:01,639 Speaker 2: right now, I do. I don't want it to be 411 00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:03,719 Speaker 2: too late when I'm ready to find out there were 412 00:18:03,760 --> 00:18:06,160 Speaker 2: issues that I could have, you know, gotten on top 413 00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:09,639 Speaker 2: of you know, it's like it's like saving up for retirement. 414 00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:12,160 Speaker 2: Like I'm not going to retire tomorrow, but I want 415 00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:14,479 Speaker 2: to make it easier for myself by taking some steps 416 00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:17,000 Speaker 2: today to make sure that I can retire. 417 00:18:17,040 --> 00:18:35,480 Speaker 4: Well, h questions, how you going to? 418 00:18:36,560 --> 00:18:39,120 Speaker 3: I really need to learn the words to what was that? 419 00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:41,920 Speaker 3: I said? It's A. It's A. That's the shout song, 420 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:43,600 Speaker 3: I think, and it's like. 421 00:18:44,359 --> 00:18:49,360 Speaker 2: I don't know, Okay, yeah, misindependent or no independent, Yeah, 422 00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:51,320 Speaker 2: Charlie's angels. 423 00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:52,560 Speaker 3: I don't know. 424 00:18:52,560 --> 00:18:54,320 Speaker 1: But one of these days I'm going to learn some 425 00:18:54,320 --> 00:18:56,440 Speaker 1: some some some words so it makes sense. 426 00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:58,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, it makes Yeah, you got it, you got it, 427 00:18:58,520 --> 00:18:59,000 Speaker 2: I got you. 428 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:00,400 Speaker 3: Yeah. 429 00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:02,399 Speaker 2: Questions, So, if you guys want to send us questions, 430 00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:04,200 Speaker 2: you know, you can hit us up at Brannambission Podcast 431 00:19:04,280 --> 00:19:09,320 Speaker 2: at gmail dot com. Got and we got an amazing 432 00:19:09,359 --> 00:19:12,040 Speaker 2: assortment of questions. Also, I need to apologize because we 433 00:19:12,200 --> 00:19:14,760 Speaker 2: ran and we ran a rerun while we were taking 434 00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:16,760 Speaker 2: a couple of weeks off in late August, and I 435 00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:19,919 Speaker 2: guess I accidentally left a call out that we had 436 00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:21,680 Speaker 2: put on the show a couple of years ago where 437 00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:23,719 Speaker 2: we were asking people to tell us what brand ambition 438 00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:26,320 Speaker 2: means to you to enter a contest where you can 439 00:19:26,359 --> 00:19:29,040 Speaker 2: have dinner with us and get a swag, get some 440 00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:33,399 Speaker 2: swag from Tiffany. And that contest is no longer technically running, 441 00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:36,200 Speaker 2: but we got some fun emails from you, guys, So 442 00:19:36,560 --> 00:19:39,439 Speaker 2: I think we're going to talk about some way to 443 00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:41,760 Speaker 2: thank you guys for those sweet messages that you sent. 444 00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:45,480 Speaker 2: But I'm sorry that was an old contest, my bad, 445 00:19:46,040 --> 00:19:49,280 Speaker 2: no longer running, So stay tuned, Stay tuned, We'll find 446 00:19:49,280 --> 00:19:51,959 Speaker 2: a way to thank you, guys. But a couple of 447 00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:55,280 Speaker 2: questions in the mailbox this week. Let's take one from 448 00:19:55,359 --> 00:19:59,159 Speaker 2: listener Shantel. Chantel says, you talked, You ladies talked a 449 00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:02,040 Speaker 2: lot last year about engagement rings and the amount a 450 00:20:02,040 --> 00:20:04,679 Speaker 2: man should spend for one. I'm not engaged yet, but 451 00:20:04,760 --> 00:20:06,879 Speaker 2: like Tiffany, I know it's coming and I'm trying to 452 00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:10,560 Speaker 2: prepare for my expenses, so her expenses. That's funny, to 453 00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:13,119 Speaker 2: be honest. I want his band, his wedding band, to 454 00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:15,520 Speaker 2: be special, so I want to customize it a little. 455 00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:18,040 Speaker 2: Not sure how yet. My question is how much did you, 456 00:20:18,119 --> 00:20:20,879 Speaker 2: ladies pay for your husband's wedding bands? And did a 457 00:20:20,880 --> 00:20:25,320 Speaker 2: lot of thought go into it interesting. So much focus 458 00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:28,200 Speaker 2: on the women's engagement ring, but uh, did the men 459 00:20:28,240 --> 00:20:28,800 Speaker 2: get any love? 460 00:20:31,160 --> 00:20:33,399 Speaker 3: I'm not gonna lie, I'm the worst person to ask us. 461 00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:37,840 Speaker 1: We didn't spend that much, honestly, because he is so 462 00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:40,320 Speaker 1: similar to me in that he was like what. 463 00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:41,399 Speaker 3: His only thing was. 464 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:45,560 Speaker 1: We were literally like going to Macy's for like a code, 465 00:20:45,600 --> 00:20:48,000 Speaker 1: and then we walked by the obviously I already had 466 00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:49,560 Speaker 1: my engagement ring already. 467 00:20:49,359 --> 00:20:50,520 Speaker 3: And then we walked by the. 468 00:20:52,520 --> 00:20:55,040 Speaker 1: Jewelry section and he's like, oh, do you want to 469 00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:57,320 Speaker 1: look because we have to get bands because we were, 470 00:20:57,440 --> 00:20:59,480 Speaker 1: you know, getting married I guess in a couple of weeks. 471 00:20:59,520 --> 00:21:00,720 Speaker 3: And I said okay. 472 00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:03,400 Speaker 1: So when it came down to his he honestly didn't 473 00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:06,639 Speaker 1: want any embellishment on it. He just wanted like a 474 00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:10,960 Speaker 1: simple uh uh what is that rose gold? 475 00:21:10,960 --> 00:21:12,720 Speaker 3: What's the gold that looks like silver? White gold? 476 00:21:13,080 --> 00:21:13,920 Speaker 2: White gold? Yeah? 477 00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:17,119 Speaker 1: Yeah, so a simple white gold band. And my husband 478 00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:19,120 Speaker 1: is like really tall, so he was like, I don't 479 00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:20,760 Speaker 1: want to do you know, one of these baby bands, 480 00:21:20,800 --> 00:21:23,040 Speaker 1: you know, so he wanted like he wanted like a 481 00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:25,800 Speaker 1: thick band, but you know, so but something that was 482 00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:28,320 Speaker 1: going to look normal. So it might look thick on me, 483 00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:31,879 Speaker 1: but it looks normal on him. And honestly, it was 484 00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:35,119 Speaker 1: like because it was so simple, it was like, I 485 00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,879 Speaker 1: want to say, probably not even a thousand dollars. And 486 00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:39,720 Speaker 1: then and then on top of that, Macy's was having 487 00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:42,959 Speaker 1: this huge tremendous sale. It was like, and then we 488 00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:44,879 Speaker 1: also had like, he has a Macy's car, so it 489 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:49,520 Speaker 1: was like, hey, this weekend, you know, this jewelry is like, 490 00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:49,920 Speaker 1: you know. 491 00:21:50,240 --> 00:21:51,639 Speaker 3: Fifty percent off plus with your car. 492 00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:54,880 Speaker 1: And it ended up being like, I think, like for something 493 00:21:54,920 --> 00:21:57,040 Speaker 1: five hundred dollars, So it was next to nothing, not 494 00:21:57,080 --> 00:21:58,960 Speaker 1: next to nothing, but for as far as a band 495 00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:02,399 Speaker 1: is concerned. So yeah, we didn't like, you know, it 496 00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:05,720 Speaker 1: was just us strolling through. And like I said, he 497 00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:08,840 Speaker 1: specifically didn't want he didn't want any diamonds, He didn't 498 00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:12,439 Speaker 1: want any He just wanted a really simple band. And 499 00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:16,000 Speaker 1: I mean, and so it was easy for me, so 500 00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:17,359 Speaker 1: I didn't have to really think about it. I mean, 501 00:22:17,359 --> 00:22:19,320 Speaker 1: if he would have wanted something fancy, you know, and 502 00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:22,199 Speaker 1: I'm like, do do the women traditionally pay for we 503 00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:23,920 Speaker 1: just kind of did it as a I don't want 504 00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:26,040 Speaker 1: to say as a couple, but we were like it's 505 00:22:26,040 --> 00:22:27,920 Speaker 1: on the Macy's card and it just gets paid for 506 00:22:28,040 --> 00:22:30,320 Speaker 1: our bill's account, so I never thought about it. 507 00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:33,080 Speaker 3: Did you pay for end weekend? Ooh for husbies? 508 00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:36,760 Speaker 2: Oh it's fun. He's out there Husby's wedding band. 509 00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:37,120 Speaker 3: Yeah. 510 00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:38,720 Speaker 2: I mean by that point, we were living together and 511 00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:43,320 Speaker 2: our finances were one so he saved separately in a 512 00:22:43,359 --> 00:22:47,439 Speaker 2: secret savings account for my engagement ring, and I forget 513 00:22:47,440 --> 00:22:48,959 Speaker 2: how we paid for I mean, yeah, I was kind 514 00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:51,800 Speaker 2: of out of one pot. But his wedding band was 515 00:22:51,840 --> 00:22:55,119 Speaker 2: five hundred dollars and that was significantly less than my 516 00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,600 Speaker 2: wedding band. But I feel like men get off easy 517 00:22:57,640 --> 00:23:00,720 Speaker 2: because you know, their bands are typical, more simple and 518 00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:03,359 Speaker 2: they don't have you know, diamonds or embellishments and stuff. 519 00:23:03,359 --> 00:23:05,720 Speaker 2: And yeah, same thing. He had a very simple, I 520 00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:09,320 Speaker 2: think a platinum or white gold band, and we went 521 00:23:09,359 --> 00:23:11,959 Speaker 2: to a local jewelry shop in Brooklyn that we just 522 00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:16,240 Speaker 2: happened to be passing through, kind of similar to your story, 523 00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:19,240 Speaker 2: and that was that was it. Five hundred bucks? I 524 00:23:19,240 --> 00:23:22,000 Speaker 2: think five hundred bucks Max. Like, I don't know, unless 525 00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:24,280 Speaker 2: your man wants something really fancy, I don't I don't 526 00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:26,120 Speaker 2: see any reason to spend more than five hundred bucks 527 00:23:26,160 --> 00:23:26,600 Speaker 2: on something. 528 00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:29,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's why I said, Like I mean, like I said, 529 00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:31,040 Speaker 1: it's because his was I'm sure you know Macy's. 530 00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:33,120 Speaker 3: I'm sure it's inflated anyway, No. 531 00:23:33,119 --> 00:23:35,200 Speaker 1: Shade to Macy's, but like, yeah, I was really thinking 532 00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:37,160 Speaker 1: in my head like it should not be. I hadn't 533 00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:38,800 Speaker 1: done any research on bands, so I was like I 534 00:23:38,840 --> 00:23:40,920 Speaker 1: didn't know what the norm was. But when it came 535 00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:43,119 Speaker 1: all down to the price, I was like, oh, okay, 536 00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:44,320 Speaker 1: four fifty or whatever. 537 00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:45,280 Speaker 3: That sounds good. 538 00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:48,919 Speaker 2: He was like, yeah, just divide that by eternity, and 539 00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:52,240 Speaker 2: you know, it's like a dollar. 540 00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:55,720 Speaker 3: A year exactly. I love that. Divide that by eternity. 541 00:23:56,240 --> 00:23:57,879 Speaker 2: Like when they sell you a mattress, it's someone that 542 00:23:57,920 --> 00:23:59,800 Speaker 2: had cost you eighty none sense a day. When you 543 00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:02,000 Speaker 2: think about the average time you're going to own a mattress, 544 00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:06,640 Speaker 2: what does that even mean? Thanks Sean Teal and good 545 00:24:06,840 --> 00:24:09,560 Speaker 2: good on you for at least thinking ahead and hopefully 546 00:24:09,640 --> 00:24:12,919 Speaker 2: it works out. Uh So, let's take another question this was. 547 00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:16,879 Speaker 2: This is a funny one from an anonymous listener. She says, 548 00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:19,200 Speaker 2: I am currently working at payoff some credit card debt 549 00:24:19,280 --> 00:24:22,160 Speaker 2: using the debt snowball method. I plan on having everything 550 00:24:22,240 --> 00:24:25,000 Speaker 2: paid off next year, but restricted spending is kind of 551 00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:27,560 Speaker 2: getting me down right now. I miss being able to 552 00:24:27,560 --> 00:24:29,480 Speaker 2: grab a bottle of wine on my way home without 553 00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:31,800 Speaker 2: a second thought, or buying new clothes on a whim. 554 00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:34,399 Speaker 2: While budgeting makes me feel more in control of my 555 00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:37,600 Speaker 2: finances and aware of my spending, which is fantastic, I'm 556 00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:40,280 Speaker 2: just having a hard time adjusting to my new budget 557 00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:46,760 Speaker 2: babe lifestyle. Any thoughts or recommendations, Poor anonymous, poor budget babe, 558 00:24:46,800 --> 00:24:51,359 Speaker 2: we'll call her. You're trying to get used to your 559 00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:54,520 Speaker 2: your new budget conscious life. Yeah, you know, it's it's 560 00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:56,800 Speaker 2: not fun when you think about it as missing out 561 00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:59,840 Speaker 2: on something, you know, so don't think about the bottle 562 00:24:59,880 --> 00:25:02,600 Speaker 2: of wine that you're missing out on. Well, we'll get back. 563 00:25:02,760 --> 00:25:04,479 Speaker 2: We'll come back to that bottle of wine, because I've 564 00:25:04,520 --> 00:25:06,360 Speaker 2: been budgeting for a while and I never I never 565 00:25:06,440 --> 00:25:09,399 Speaker 2: missed my bottle of wine. But I mean, think about 566 00:25:09,640 --> 00:25:11,760 Speaker 2: think about what you're going to be gaining by paying 567 00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:13,959 Speaker 2: off that credit card debt. Think about every dollar you're 568 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,160 Speaker 2: paying off as one dollar in your pocket, Like you're 569 00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:19,320 Speaker 2: getting richer by paying off that credit card debt. And 570 00:25:19,359 --> 00:25:22,480 Speaker 2: then I mean maybe maybe your budget is so is 571 00:25:22,520 --> 00:25:25,320 Speaker 2: restricted in the wrong ways, Like maybe the things that 572 00:25:25,320 --> 00:25:27,320 Speaker 2: truly bring you joy you could make a little bit 573 00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:29,760 Speaker 2: more room in your budget for and then cut back 574 00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:32,920 Speaker 2: in other areas to save money. I mean, a five 575 00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:36,240 Speaker 2: dollars ten dollars bottle of wine, you know once in 576 00:25:36,280 --> 00:25:39,280 Speaker 2: a while will not should not be breaking your budget. 577 00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:42,080 Speaker 2: So I would, I would, just I would, I would 578 00:25:42,119 --> 00:25:44,560 Speaker 2: take a look at where you're cutting back and maybe 579 00:25:44,960 --> 00:25:46,680 Speaker 2: bake in a little bit of wiggle room if you're 580 00:25:46,680 --> 00:25:48,680 Speaker 2: being way too restrictive, because like you don't want to 581 00:25:48,680 --> 00:25:53,160 Speaker 2: make life miserable. And then even beyond that, just think 582 00:25:53,200 --> 00:25:56,480 Speaker 2: about your mindset around budgeting too, because I think that's important. 583 00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:59,280 Speaker 2: Just think about the positive aspects of it versus what 584 00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:00,320 Speaker 2: you may be missing on. 585 00:26:01,320 --> 00:26:03,439 Speaker 1: Yeah, and also too, sometimes it helps of like I mean, 586 00:26:03,480 --> 00:26:05,959 Speaker 1: I don't know if you're a cash person, but like 587 00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:09,240 Speaker 1: it helps to have like money that you don't have 588 00:26:09,320 --> 00:26:11,520 Speaker 1: to think about, meaning like you know, so one of 589 00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:14,160 Speaker 1: the things I used to do when I was teaching 590 00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:17,600 Speaker 1: a preschool and I had like this really like kind 591 00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:19,720 Speaker 1: of like concrete budget. I kind of had like this 592 00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:22,520 Speaker 1: fun money where it was like it was either on 593 00:26:22,560 --> 00:26:24,680 Speaker 1: my debit card or I would take it out in cash, 594 00:26:24,720 --> 00:26:27,159 Speaker 1: and I did, like I purposely did not have to 595 00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:28,080 Speaker 1: be responsible with it. 596 00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:29,320 Speaker 3: It was like tiffany. 597 00:26:29,040 --> 00:26:32,320 Speaker 1: Retirement money set aside savings and set aside bills are 598 00:26:32,320 --> 00:26:35,880 Speaker 1: set aside, and this fun money, this whatever it is, 599 00:26:35,880 --> 00:26:37,960 Speaker 1: is literally I could. I used to tell myself, you 600 00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:39,600 Speaker 1: could take this money and flush it down the toilet 601 00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:43,440 Speaker 1: and you're fine. Like this is like your non allocated 602 00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:45,879 Speaker 1: has to be responsible money. So sometimes setting aside that 603 00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:49,800 Speaker 1: you know, outside of your other responsibilities helps because if 604 00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:52,080 Speaker 1: I want a sushi every night for a week, and 605 00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:54,359 Speaker 1: my fun money, you know, allowed for that, then so 606 00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:58,440 Speaker 1: be it. And so that way, you know, when you 607 00:26:58,480 --> 00:27:01,080 Speaker 1: when you splurge, you can do so without you know, 608 00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:05,760 Speaker 1: without worrying about it. Sett inside a fun fund might 609 00:27:05,760 --> 00:27:06,280 Speaker 1: be helpful. 610 00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:10,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, I totally agree. I mean, a small five dollars 611 00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:11,520 Speaker 2: bottle of one if it brings you joy and it 612 00:27:11,560 --> 00:27:13,480 Speaker 2: makes you feel like you're still living your fun life, 613 00:27:13,560 --> 00:27:16,160 Speaker 2: missbudget babe, I mean, that's a small price to pay, 614 00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:18,679 Speaker 2: and I don't feel like it's gonna wreck your It's 615 00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:21,680 Speaker 2: not going to make your break your budget, you know. Yeah, 616 00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:23,680 Speaker 2: treat yourself, just a tiny bit. 617 00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:26,040 Speaker 3: Treat yourself preach yourself. 618 00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:29,760 Speaker 2: Thank you for your question, and good luck. Budget Babe. 619 00:27:29,760 --> 00:27:30,400 Speaker 2: Just stick with it. 620 00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:33,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, you got it, You got it. 621 00:27:33,560 --> 00:27:37,879 Speaker 2: Because budget Babe is way more fun than debt Diva. 622 00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:41,200 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, ah yeah. 623 00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:45,880 Speaker 2: Debt depression. Okay, one last question. I'm maybe a couple 624 00:27:45,880 --> 00:27:48,720 Speaker 2: more so. This is another anonymous question. Y'all shady in 625 00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:52,320 Speaker 2: these streets. She says, Hey, guys, I love your show. 626 00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:54,200 Speaker 2: I'm late to the podcast game and just started about 627 00:27:54,200 --> 00:27:57,240 Speaker 2: a month ago, but you're my number one show for inspiration. Awesome. 628 00:27:57,720 --> 00:28:01,520 Speaker 2: My question is a tax question. Yea, I did not 629 00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:04,000 Speaker 2: file my taxes quite Tiffany, just like. 630 00:28:05,240 --> 00:28:06,560 Speaker 3: I've been there, girl reads. 631 00:28:07,280 --> 00:28:10,200 Speaker 2: She says, we're also we're getting a tax question in September, 632 00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:12,520 Speaker 2: so we know where this is going. Okay, She says, 633 00:28:12,520 --> 00:28:14,600 Speaker 2: I did not file my tax this year and also 634 00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:17,400 Speaker 2: did not file for an extension. I know I owe 635 00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:20,119 Speaker 2: a huge amount and I just panicked. I usually do 636 00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:22,240 Speaker 2: my own taxes through Turbo tax, but I'm a little 637 00:28:22,280 --> 00:28:25,080 Speaker 2: scared since I'm so late. Should I just hire someone 638 00:28:25,119 --> 00:28:26,879 Speaker 2: to do them or should I just file like I 639 00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:29,960 Speaker 2: usually do ps. I have a senior in high school 640 00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:31,800 Speaker 2: and I need my taxes done so we can get 641 00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:33,800 Speaker 2: her facts for going in a few months. 642 00:28:33,920 --> 00:28:34,160 Speaker 3: Help. 643 00:28:34,280 --> 00:28:36,560 Speaker 2: Any suggestions are greatly appreciated. 644 00:28:36,760 --> 00:28:37,040 Speaker 3: Woof. 645 00:28:37,480 --> 00:28:41,400 Speaker 2: Yeah, not filing your taxes not cool. So if you 646 00:28:41,760 --> 00:28:43,880 Speaker 2: guys are out there, if you owe taxes, just because 647 00:28:43,880 --> 00:28:46,960 Speaker 2: you don't file doesn't mean that the IRS doesn't see 648 00:28:46,960 --> 00:28:51,760 Speaker 2: the debt. It's still there and a cruing interest. So 649 00:28:51,840 --> 00:28:54,000 Speaker 2: you don't say how much you owe. But the worst 650 00:28:54,040 --> 00:28:56,000 Speaker 2: thing you can do is what you're doing now, which 651 00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:58,240 Speaker 2: is to ignore it. To be perfectly honest, you need 652 00:28:58,320 --> 00:29:01,400 Speaker 2: to go to IRS dot of find the find the 653 00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:03,280 Speaker 2: I'm gonna literally send you a link to an i 654 00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:05,840 Speaker 2: rs dot coup page where you have the contact info 655 00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:08,680 Speaker 2: where you can call them and get on a payment plan. 656 00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:11,200 Speaker 3: Yeah, I was gonna say that they exist. 657 00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:14,560 Speaker 2: I know people who have done IRS payment plans, and 658 00:29:14,880 --> 00:29:16,640 Speaker 2: you know, interests will still accrue, but at least you 659 00:29:16,680 --> 00:29:18,640 Speaker 2: will be getting on top of it and getting your 660 00:29:18,680 --> 00:29:20,680 Speaker 2: ducks in a row versus just letting it sit out 661 00:29:20,720 --> 00:29:23,680 Speaker 2: there and collect late penalties and nastiness. 662 00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:25,920 Speaker 1: And honestly, if you have a good like so like 663 00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:29,080 Speaker 1: my accountant, Carlos, I remember, like you think you're mad 664 00:29:29,280 --> 00:29:33,480 Speaker 1: tried three years three years of non filing pack when 665 00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:35,320 Speaker 1: I when I started my businesses because I was like, 666 00:29:35,360 --> 00:29:37,360 Speaker 1: I didn't even really make no money. That's not how 667 00:29:37,360 --> 00:29:42,280 Speaker 1: it works, Oh my god. And honestly, I ended up 668 00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:46,280 Speaker 1: owing eight thousand dollars like at the end, in half 669 00:29:46,320 --> 00:29:47,120 Speaker 1: of which were fees. 670 00:29:47,200 --> 00:29:48,120 Speaker 3: Can you imagine? 671 00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:52,160 Speaker 1: Almost like Carlos was like, tiphany, Yo, you didn't even 672 00:29:52,200 --> 00:29:54,440 Speaker 1: owe that much, like because you're right, you didn't make 673 00:29:54,440 --> 00:29:57,240 Speaker 1: a ton, but because it was like fiance and fild 674 00:29:57,280 --> 00:29:58,200 Speaker 1: top and fiantip. 675 00:29:57,920 --> 00:29:58,760 Speaker 3: Fee and so. 676 00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:02,360 Speaker 1: But there's also too like you if you're nervous about 677 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:04,800 Speaker 1: doing it yourself. I know a friend of mine who 678 00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:08,120 Speaker 1: he owed even more than that. He owed a significant 679 00:30:08,160 --> 00:30:11,160 Speaker 1: amount of money. And because of the amount, I like 680 00:30:11,160 --> 00:30:12,440 Speaker 1: I said, I don't know how much you owe since 681 00:30:12,440 --> 00:30:14,920 Speaker 1: it's just a year, But because of the amount, Carlos 682 00:30:14,960 --> 00:30:16,720 Speaker 1: was able to call the IRS and actually work out 683 00:30:17,040 --> 00:30:21,320 Speaker 1: not only a payment plan but a reduction. So like 684 00:30:21,360 --> 00:30:24,680 Speaker 1: you know, like like me eight thousand, although it was 685 00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:26,480 Speaker 1: a good amount of money, it's not like I think 686 00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:30,480 Speaker 1: my friend owed like thirty thousand something crazy, so and 687 00:30:30,760 --> 00:30:31,840 Speaker 1: he was just like, there's no way I'm going to 688 00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:33,840 Speaker 1: be able to pay that. So you know, he worked 689 00:30:33,840 --> 00:30:37,760 Speaker 1: out some sort of like well, settlement basically, so depending 690 00:30:37,800 --> 00:30:41,320 Speaker 1: on how much, if it's if it's you know, you know, 691 00:30:41,480 --> 00:30:44,040 Speaker 1: I don't know, a few thousand or a few hundred, 692 00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:46,160 Speaker 1: you know, calling the IRS and just say I could 693 00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:47,880 Speaker 1: do this by myself. But if you're like I really 694 00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:50,240 Speaker 1: think I owe even more than that, you might want 695 00:30:50,240 --> 00:30:55,640 Speaker 1: to get an accountant who So Carlos's father used to 696 00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:58,400 Speaker 1: actually work for the IRS and together they opened a firm. 697 00:30:58,600 --> 00:31:01,760 Speaker 1: So looking for an accountant who has a specialty and 698 00:31:01,880 --> 00:31:04,440 Speaker 1: like basically like IRS dealings. You know, that's one of 699 00:31:04,480 --> 00:31:06,640 Speaker 1: the reasons why I him is because he's not just 700 00:31:06,640 --> 00:31:09,960 Speaker 1: the regular CPA. He's someone who actually, like, if if 701 00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:11,520 Speaker 1: I had to go to IRS court, he would go 702 00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:15,720 Speaker 1: on my behalf. He's done that before for people, So yeah, 703 00:31:15,840 --> 00:31:16,000 Speaker 1: you know. 704 00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:17,640 Speaker 2: You'll probably end up doing is getting put on some 705 00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:20,760 Speaker 2: sort of installment month installment agreement, and installments is just 706 00:31:20,760 --> 00:31:23,160 Speaker 2: where you pay the debt off in a monthly payment. 707 00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:25,240 Speaker 2: And I believe with the if you that's for people 708 00:31:25,240 --> 00:31:28,480 Speaker 2: who owe fifty thousand dollars or less. I'm actually looking 709 00:31:28,480 --> 00:31:31,320 Speaker 2: at the Magnifying Money Guide to Facing Tax Debt, which 710 00:31:31,360 --> 00:31:32,880 Speaker 2: I can send you a link to as well, which 711 00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:36,200 Speaker 2: probably has some helpful information. But yeah, I mean you 712 00:31:36,200 --> 00:31:40,440 Speaker 2: you just just just be honest with yourself about it, Anonymous, 713 00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:43,680 Speaker 2: and get on top of it, because I mean, you're right, 714 00:31:43,760 --> 00:31:46,400 Speaker 2: you do need you need to have your I believe 715 00:31:46,440 --> 00:31:49,600 Speaker 2: you need to have your most recent W two, not 716 00:31:49,760 --> 00:31:53,040 Speaker 2: W two, but most recent tax files, tax is filed 717 00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:55,600 Speaker 2: if you want to fill out your kid's FAFSVA. So 718 00:31:55,880 --> 00:31:57,760 Speaker 2: you want to get on that days app. 719 00:31:58,000 --> 00:31:58,560 Speaker 3: Yes you do. 720 00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:02,200 Speaker 2: But thank you for your question and being honest about it, 721 00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:03,960 Speaker 2: because now you're you can at least get on the right. 722 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:07,240 Speaker 3: Track exactly, because you know everybody makes mistakes. Is about 723 00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:07,800 Speaker 3: what do you do. 724 00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:09,920 Speaker 2: Now all of us make mistakes? 725 00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:10,080 Speaker 4: You know? 726 00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:13,040 Speaker 2: I was just speaking to I was at this conference 727 00:32:13,080 --> 00:32:14,680 Speaker 2: last week, I mentioned, and I got to talk with 728 00:32:14,720 --> 00:32:17,200 Speaker 2: a handful of kids who go to HBCUs and they're 729 00:32:17,200 --> 00:32:20,000 Speaker 2: studying journalism, and of course I went there to like 730 00:32:20,040 --> 00:32:22,160 Speaker 2: talk about career, but I ended up talking like by 731 00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:24,240 Speaker 2: the end of it, I had them all on discoverscorecard 732 00:32:24,240 --> 00:32:26,640 Speaker 2: dot com and checking their credit report. You know, it 733 00:32:26,680 --> 00:32:28,400 Speaker 2: was it was really hilarious. But like one of the 734 00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:31,800 Speaker 2: girls in the group, she like she was so nervous 735 00:32:31,840 --> 00:32:35,080 Speaker 2: to admit that she had taken out this Discover student 736 00:32:35,120 --> 00:32:38,400 Speaker 2: credit card and then had misplaced a credit card and 737 00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:41,320 Speaker 2: hadn't told her parents, and she was super she just didn't. 738 00:32:41,400 --> 00:32:43,080 Speaker 2: She was like, I don't. I'm just I did just 739 00:32:43,200 --> 00:32:45,120 Speaker 2: feel like it's really bad that I lost it, and 740 00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:46,680 Speaker 2: I feel like people could be using it. I just 741 00:32:46,680 --> 00:32:49,080 Speaker 2: didn't want to tell anybody, and I'm like, but I 742 00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:50,920 Speaker 2: was like, oh, it's okay. You know, I lose my 743 00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:52,840 Speaker 2: credit card all the time, not really all the time, 744 00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:55,040 Speaker 2: but it's such an easy fix. And yeah, she just 745 00:32:55,080 --> 00:32:57,920 Speaker 2: felt this sense of like embarrassment around it and around 746 00:32:57,920 --> 00:33:00,880 Speaker 2: the repercussions. So it's not just big things, like tax said, 747 00:33:00,880 --> 00:33:03,520 Speaker 2: it's like even the small things. Everyone kind of you know, 748 00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:05,840 Speaker 2: you get like you feel embarrassed and you don't want 749 00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:08,440 Speaker 2: to do anything. But that's usually the worst thing to do. 750 00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:11,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, not even it's always the worst thing to do, 751 00:33:11,360 --> 00:33:13,680 Speaker 1: but it's always the number one default, isn't it. 752 00:33:13,680 --> 00:33:15,280 Speaker 3: You're like, yeh, child, but that hurs. 753 00:33:15,320 --> 00:33:19,200 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna stit here with it, my toothaches, you 754 00:33:19,240 --> 00:33:20,640 Speaker 1: know what, let me see how long I can wait. 755 00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:21,200 Speaker 3: Let me know. 756 00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:24,720 Speaker 1: The default is always if I ignore, maybe it'll go away. 757 00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:28,480 Speaker 1: And it literally only compounds the trouble. So I'm trying 758 00:33:28,520 --> 00:33:30,520 Speaker 1: to practice that. Like, so one of my new practices 759 00:33:30,720 --> 00:33:32,000 Speaker 1: and what do you do for this maybe is that 760 00:33:32,080 --> 00:33:36,640 Speaker 1: like if I'm scared, like say, like today my contractor 761 00:33:36,680 --> 00:33:38,160 Speaker 1: emailed me and I was I had asked him for 762 00:33:38,160 --> 00:33:39,920 Speaker 1: a bunch of things, and I thought I was scared 763 00:33:39,960 --> 00:33:41,440 Speaker 1: to open the email that he was gonna be like, girl, 764 00:33:41,440 --> 00:33:43,640 Speaker 1: you tried it, I'm moving on to somebody else, and 765 00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:45,640 Speaker 1: so I forced myself as soon as I saw it, 766 00:33:45,920 --> 00:33:48,360 Speaker 1: I was like, I'm scared opening now. So I'm trying 767 00:33:48,400 --> 00:33:52,160 Speaker 1: to re re kind of like I guess, I don't know, 768 00:33:52,240 --> 00:33:56,840 Speaker 1: like I almost like retrain my brain that fear equates 769 00:33:56,840 --> 00:33:59,200 Speaker 1: to immediate action because that's not my normal. 770 00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:00,520 Speaker 3: That's not my normal trajectory. 771 00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:03,280 Speaker 1: When something happens, it's like, yeah, yikes, I'm scared, open 772 00:34:03,320 --> 00:34:05,960 Speaker 1: the door, yikes, I'm scared, read the email, yanks, I'm scared. 773 00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:09,000 Speaker 3: Listen to the voice message, you know. And so that's 774 00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:10,080 Speaker 3: like what I've been trying to practice. 775 00:34:10,120 --> 00:34:12,120 Speaker 1: I don't always get there, but I feel like I'm 776 00:34:12,239 --> 00:34:14,520 Speaker 1: like fifty percent of the way there of doing the 777 00:34:15,080 --> 00:34:18,360 Speaker 1: doing the that initial take action right away when fear. 778 00:34:18,280 --> 00:34:21,239 Speaker 2: Hits I'm totally with you on the whole. I get 779 00:34:21,239 --> 00:34:22,640 Speaker 2: an email, you know how you can like read the 780 00:34:22,640 --> 00:34:25,239 Speaker 2: first line of the email to creeve you, and I'm like, 781 00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:27,560 Speaker 2: I don't think I want to read this right now. 782 00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:30,440 Speaker 2: I like close my browser and try and tell myself 783 00:34:30,440 --> 00:34:33,040 Speaker 2: I didn't see it. Yeah, but then it just ends 784 00:34:33,120 --> 00:34:35,040 Speaker 2: up weighing on me and it just stresses me out. 785 00:34:35,080 --> 00:34:36,640 Speaker 2: Like I'll try and say I'm not going to read 786 00:34:36,680 --> 00:34:38,200 Speaker 2: that till tomorrow, but then I end up reading it 787 00:34:38,239 --> 00:34:41,040 Speaker 2: that night because I just can't, you know, sit with 788 00:34:41,160 --> 00:34:44,279 Speaker 2: the wondering for that much longer. So I agree, just 789 00:34:44,360 --> 00:34:45,319 Speaker 2: pull the band aid off. 790 00:34:45,800 --> 00:34:48,239 Speaker 1: Yeah, so I'm super passive aggressive. I'll actually send an 791 00:34:48,280 --> 00:34:50,120 Speaker 1: email to a friend. I'm like, girl, read you, So 792 00:34:50,200 --> 00:34:50,920 Speaker 1: what is it bad? 793 00:34:50,960 --> 00:34:51,359 Speaker 3: It is it good? 794 00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:54,080 Speaker 2: I've just done a couple of times. 795 00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:56,399 Speaker 3: I'll just get one to ten. What would you say? 796 00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:02,799 Speaker 3: Read the email and then you want to take one more? 797 00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:05,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, we can do one more. Quick question. This is 798 00:35:05,400 --> 00:35:08,520 Speaker 2: from listener Pollette. She says, one, do y'all think is 799 00:35:08,560 --> 00:35:10,840 Speaker 2: a good time to request your interest rate to be 800 00:35:10,880 --> 00:35:14,840 Speaker 2: lowered on your credit card and or a credit limit increase? 801 00:35:17,160 --> 00:35:19,560 Speaker 2: Did you guys know you can request an interest rate 802 00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:22,120 Speaker 2: reduction on your credit card. You can. 803 00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:26,719 Speaker 1: Sometimes I usually say like if right, I think I 804 00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:28,600 Speaker 1: feel like A good time is if you've seen that 805 00:35:28,640 --> 00:35:31,960 Speaker 1: your credit score has increased, because typically the question is, like, 806 00:35:32,480 --> 00:35:34,920 Speaker 1: you know, the reason why you have the interest rate 807 00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:37,200 Speaker 1: is the reflection of where your score basically is. So 808 00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:39,920 Speaker 1: if I've seen, like, hey, my score is doing so 809 00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:42,440 Speaker 1: much better than it was six months ago whenever I 810 00:35:42,480 --> 00:35:45,719 Speaker 1: got this card, let me call, then that's a that's 811 00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:46,319 Speaker 1: a good time. 812 00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:49,480 Speaker 2: But I not after you miss three payments in a row. 813 00:35:49,719 --> 00:35:51,560 Speaker 1: Because I'm like, oh, so glad you call because you 814 00:35:51,560 --> 00:35:52,640 Speaker 1: owe us money. 815 00:35:52,960 --> 00:35:54,640 Speaker 3: Yeah. 816 00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:57,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, but I mean, it doesn't hurt to ask for 817 00:35:57,640 --> 00:36:00,360 Speaker 2: a credit a rate reduction, but when you ask for 818 00:36:00,360 --> 00:36:03,240 Speaker 2: a credit limit increase, just know that it will trigger 819 00:36:03,239 --> 00:36:05,479 Speaker 2: a hard inquiry on your credit report because they're basically 820 00:36:05,520 --> 00:36:07,840 Speaker 2: going to pull your credit again and it could be 821 00:36:07,880 --> 00:36:12,000 Speaker 2: a temporary ding to your credit. Have you found this though? 822 00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:15,520 Speaker 2: Sometimes I've indirectly gotten a credit limit increase by just 823 00:36:15,640 --> 00:36:19,640 Speaker 2: using my card a lot. Yeah, like charging, Yeah, I mean, 824 00:36:19,680 --> 00:36:23,080 Speaker 2: it's it's kind of bad. But sometimes if you actually 825 00:36:23,200 --> 00:36:26,719 Speaker 2: use your card and you you are almost maxing it 826 00:36:26,760 --> 00:36:28,359 Speaker 2: out and you're paying it off each month, but you're 827 00:36:28,360 --> 00:36:31,360 Speaker 2: almost maxing out each month as well. They will eventually 828 00:36:31,719 --> 00:36:33,640 Speaker 2: some credit cards will be checking for that and they 829 00:36:33,680 --> 00:36:36,040 Speaker 2: will bump your limit up. That happened to us with 830 00:36:36,080 --> 00:36:38,360 Speaker 2: our one of our credit cards recently because we've been 831 00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:41,359 Speaker 2: buying so many appliances, and they were like, Okay, we'll 832 00:36:41,400 --> 00:36:43,520 Speaker 2: give you more wiggle room because you need a bigger 833 00:36:43,560 --> 00:36:44,600 Speaker 2: limit on your credit card. 834 00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:48,239 Speaker 1: No, for sure, but you're right, it's not about like, 835 00:36:48,280 --> 00:36:50,520 Speaker 1: it's not like if you're just putting ten dollars on 836 00:36:50,719 --> 00:36:53,120 Speaker 1: a month, but typically they're doing that. They're like, oh, 837 00:36:53,400 --> 00:36:55,840 Speaker 1: you're responsibly using more of your balance. 838 00:36:55,880 --> 00:36:56,440 Speaker 3: We got you. 839 00:36:56,880 --> 00:36:58,799 Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean, there's nothing wrong with asking because 840 00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:02,120 Speaker 1: they will help, like the increase. Although you'll get that 841 00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:04,360 Speaker 1: like little a ding on your credit score, you know, 842 00:37:04,400 --> 00:37:06,920 Speaker 1: it might help with your utilization rate, you know, and 843 00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:11,040 Speaker 1: so you might get like actually like an increase in 844 00:37:11,360 --> 00:37:15,480 Speaker 1: your credit score because now you have unless you're actually. 845 00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:18,040 Speaker 3: Using using your you know, the card to that amount. 846 00:37:18,120 --> 00:37:19,120 Speaker 3: But now you've. 847 00:37:18,920 --> 00:37:22,080 Speaker 1: Got a bigger credit limit and hopefully you're keeping your 848 00:37:22,080 --> 00:37:26,000 Speaker 1: balances low. So the comparison of my credit limit is higher, 849 00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:28,279 Speaker 1: even though our balances might be the same. So that 850 00:37:28,440 --> 00:37:32,520 Speaker 1: difference might might result in a few points in your 851 00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:35,560 Speaker 1: credit score, so usually it kind of like a nets 852 00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:37,880 Speaker 1: out even But I mean, if your credit score is 853 00:37:38,239 --> 00:37:40,759 Speaker 1: DC and you have a decent payment history and you're 854 00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:44,400 Speaker 1: not late, typically their answer is yes. They might not 855 00:37:44,440 --> 00:37:46,520 Speaker 1: do it to the extent that you wanted, but typically 856 00:37:46,560 --> 00:37:47,440 Speaker 1: their answer is yes. 857 00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:52,840 Speaker 2: Yeah, good tip. All right, thank you, thank you b 858 00:37:52,960 --> 00:37:53,719 Speaker 2: A listeners. 859 00:37:54,200 --> 00:37:56,680 Speaker 3: Yes, this was a good one. I like you guys 860 00:37:56,680 --> 00:37:57,960 Speaker 3: have some really great questions. 861 00:37:59,520 --> 00:38:01,799 Speaker 2: Yes, sorry spaced out.