Speaker 1: Brett. I am so so sorry about this. There's only
Speaker 1: one word. I don't like you use the word accident.
Speaker 1: But if you say you and your wife are both
Speaker 1: God fearing Christians and love the Lord, which I believe
Speaker 1: that you do, and you trust God to carry through
Speaker 1: and align your past to his will, which I believe,
Speaker 1: you're sincere saying that if you believe all that, then
Speaker 1: there is no accidents. What's up, everybody? Welcome back to
Speaker 1: the podcast. This is episode one sixty three. Thanks for
Speaker 1: watching and listening wherever you're coming from or whatever platform
Speaker 1: you're using. This podcast is available free all over wherever
Speaker 1: you love to hear podcasts, and I love doing it,
Speaker 1: so thank you for being here. This is where I
Speaker 1: answer your questions. You email me anything you want to
Speaker 1: talk about, and we're going to talk about it with
Speaker 1: me not having notes and not preparing and not having
Speaker 1: a bunch of stuff sitting around and I'm going to
Speaker 1: read and figure out how to do it so with
Speaker 1: some psychological solution. That's not what this is. This is
Speaker 1: like me and you are friends and we're driving in
Speaker 1: the cab of the truck and you're like, hey man,
Speaker 1: there's something's been going on in my life. I would
Speaker 1: love to run this by you. What do you think?
Speaker 1: And I'm going to answer back with something that I
Speaker 1: would give to a friend, and I would hope that
Speaker 1: someone would return the favor. If I have a question,
Speaker 1: and I usually do so, you could email your question
Speaker 1: granger Smith Podcast at gmail dot com. Send it to
Speaker 1: Grangersmith podcast at gmail dot com, and I'm going to
Speaker 1: get to the first one. The subject line here says
Speaker 1: faith and the email says, Hi, I enjoy your videos.
Speaker 1: I watched them all the time. I'm writing because I
Speaker 1: feel like I'm losing my faith in God. My sister
Speaker 1: needs a hip replacement and the doctor's not doing anything.
Speaker 1: I'm also having health problems and I feel like God
Speaker 1: is not healing us. I have blood cancer and I've
Speaker 1: been having problems with my knee after knee replacement surgery
Speaker 1: three years ago. I've been told nothing is wrong, but
Speaker 1: these doctors that tell me this aren't having the problems.
Speaker 1: I am sorry I've bothered you. Maria. Yeah, Maria, thank
Speaker 1: you for emailing. I appreciate you open it up with something.
Speaker 1: You know that this is this is a vulnerable subject
Speaker 1: for you, so I appreciate you opening up and I'm
Speaker 1: gonna give you some tough love. I love giving tough
Speaker 1: love because I think that that's very important that I
Speaker 1: shoot you straight if I just coddle you guys, and
Speaker 1: I'm just like, oh, Maria, I'm so sorry. You know, God, God,
Speaker 1: here's you, and He's just coming. God's on the way,
Speaker 1: you know. Church. A lot of churches teach this every Sunday,
Speaker 1: and it man, I got to go easy with what
Speaker 1: I say here, but churches will teach God's on the way.
Speaker 1: You just stay right where you are, just wallow in
Speaker 1: the mud, and God is God's coming. It's like it's
Speaker 1: like God is on an airplane and the plane's delayed
Speaker 1: and he made it to his connection flight, but you
Speaker 1: know they're having engine problems. But he's coming. He's got
Speaker 1: the ticket and he always gets to his destination. Just
Speaker 1: sometimes he's late. Like they don't say that exactly in churches,
Speaker 1: but there's this idea that you just you just stay
Speaker 1: on the ground and you just wallow around in the
Speaker 1: mud and you just keep praying and God's going to
Speaker 1: come and pull you out of the mud and you
Speaker 1: just lay you just lay there, and and if he doesn't,
Speaker 1: then you you end up like Maria, and you say, no,
Speaker 1: I'm losing my faith, like maybe there isn't a God
Speaker 1: at all. That's kind of Maria, that's kind of what
Speaker 1: you're saying, right, Like if we were sitting in the
Speaker 1: cabin of the truck, you'd say, if I was going
Speaker 1: to dig into you think you're losing your faith. What
Speaker 1: you mean by that is, I think I'm I think
Speaker 1: I'm doubting that God exists. Right, So let's dive into that.
Speaker 1: Let's dive in if that's true at all? Could could
Speaker 1: God be on a delayed plane and he's coming to
Speaker 1: get you? Well, let me tell you this. God could
Speaker 1: do anything. But we see when we read the Bible,
Speaker 1: which is our revealed God's word to us. That's how
Speaker 1: we know what God is saying to us in twenty
Speaker 1: twenty two is through the Bible. And so when we
Speaker 1: go through there and we see hundreds of examples of
Speaker 1: God encountering humans in some way, right, whether it's through
Speaker 1: a judge or a king, or an apostle or a prophet,
Speaker 1: or just a man or just a woman. God's call
Speaker 1: is always a call up, a call forward, a call
Speaker 1: that says stand up, dress for action. Like a man.
Speaker 1: Let's go follow me, if you, if we, if we
Speaker 1: notice the hundreds and hundreds of commands in the Bible.
Speaker 1: It's always a call to action. It's a call to come, come, follow,
Speaker 1: do something. Activate. It's never Hey, I see you're laying
Speaker 1: there and you're you've got all these problems and I'm
Speaker 1: just gonna rescue you from the problems and make them
Speaker 1: all go away. That doesn't happen if you think that
Speaker 1: you're you're worshiping a different God, and if you're worshiping
Speaker 1: a different God than that God doesn't exist. Or let
Speaker 1: me put this another way. Or Maria, you're looking at
Speaker 1: God as a genie in a bottle and you you
Speaker 1: rub on the lamp and you get three wishes, and
Speaker 1: God pops up and you say, I got three wishes.
Speaker 1: I want my knee, my my sister's hip replacement to
Speaker 1: be better, I need my blood cancer to be fine.
Speaker 1: And I'm also, oh, yeah, God, my third one is
Speaker 1: this knee replacement surgery three years ago is not doing
Speaker 1: too well? How need you to fix that too? And
Speaker 1: so then God fixes it and then jumps back into
Speaker 1: the bottle and disappears nowhere in the Bible do we
Speaker 1: see anything like this? Can God heal yes? Do we
Speaker 1: pray for healing? Yes? But Maria, what are you doing?
Speaker 1: Are you just asking the genie? Are you in your word?
Speaker 1: Are you praying? What's your part in this besides laying
Speaker 1: in the mud wallowing? Let me tell you something tough, love, Maria,
Speaker 1: I'm so glad you listened to this podcast, and we
Speaker 1: got to think, as you're listening right now, you have
Speaker 1: to consider because I'm sure these words are gonna be
Speaker 1: hurtful to you in a way, but you have to
Speaker 1: consider that maybe, just maybe you're supposed to be hearing
Speaker 1: this from somebody, right. Okay, So go with me down
Speaker 1: this path for a second and listen to what you
Speaker 1: told me. Everything's wrong, everything's going wrong. Well, life has problems.
Speaker 1: We are stuck in a world that is broken, that
Speaker 1: has fallen, and we have tribulation. We have problems daily.
Speaker 1: In fact, the more we look, the more we find them. Now,
Speaker 1: you can't control that what's coming at you, these kind
Speaker 1: of problems, But what you can control is how you
Speaker 1: react to them. It sounds like what you're saying is
Speaker 1: through this whole thing, is that you really just want
Speaker 1: to be the victim, the victim of so many problems.
Speaker 1: Your sister's hip replacement is not doing anything, your health
Speaker 1: is just failing. These doctors are idiots. The doctors are idiots.
Speaker 1: They you are having problems with your knee replacement surgery
Speaker 1: and they say nothing's wrong. What do they know? They're
Speaker 1: not living through this pain, what do they know? Well,
Speaker 1: I mean, they did go to medical school for a
Speaker 1: lot of years. Are they just fraudulent? It sounds like
Speaker 1: you just want to be a victim, and Maria, I'm
Speaker 1: here to tell you on this podcast to stand up,
Speaker 1: to stand up and move forward. You're asking for a
Speaker 1: genie in the bottle and God's going I'll wait to
Speaker 1: you stand up. I'll wait. You think you're losing your faith?
Speaker 1: What are you doing with your faith? I've told so
Speaker 1: many people on this podcast. Faith is a verb. It's
Speaker 1: not a noun, as if you could lose it, like
Speaker 1: it's like it's tangible in your hand, like a bag
Speaker 1: of marbles, and you lost your bag of marbles. Where
Speaker 1: to go? I don't know where I put it. I've
Speaker 1: slipped away and just now they're just going down the drain.
Speaker 1: As if faith is like that. Faith is instead a
Speaker 1: verb action. It's something you put in the work every day. Now,
Speaker 1: you don't ever work to please God. You don't ever
Speaker 1: work to gain favor with God. You don't ever work
Speaker 1: for your salvation. That is clear. We are saved by
Speaker 1: grace through faith. But works, good works are a direct
Speaker 1: result of the faith. That's why James says in James
Speaker 1: two that faith without works is dead. What he means is,
Speaker 1: if you don't have good works, then how do you
Speaker 1: know that you have a saving faith that results in
Speaker 1: those works. It's a good indicator if you've got nothing
Speaker 1: going on, you're just laying in the mud. You're like,
Speaker 1: I think my faith is dead. Well maybe it is.
Speaker 1: You know why, because you have zero to show for it.
Speaker 1: So what do you do? Get in the word? You
Speaker 1: get on your knees, You go God, God. I've been
Speaker 1: praying for healing, but I have never said anything that
Speaker 1: I'm thankful for God. I have breath today. I'm so
Speaker 1: thankful for this breath. I ate a meal today. There's
Speaker 1: people on this earth that don't get a meal. I
Speaker 1: just ate a meal. I just drank clean water. You
Speaker 1: know how many people on this earth right now would
Speaker 1: love just a glass of clean water and you just
Speaker 1: got it out of your faucet. Maria, have you ever
Speaker 1: told God that, God, thank you for this water, this gift.
Speaker 1: Thank you for this clean air that I'm breathing. Thank
Speaker 1: you for this meal. God, you are holy, God, You're almighty. God.
Speaker 1: You woke me up this morning. I still have my sister. God,
Speaker 1: I love my sister. Thank you for my sister. Thank
Speaker 1: you for these doctors that are diligently working for me
Speaker 1: and my sister, trying to find cures for us. Thank
Speaker 1: you for the schooling that they have gone through so
Speaker 1: that I could be healed in some way, shape or
Speaker 1: form it someday. God, you have done all this for me,
Speaker 1: and I'm so grateful and I'm going to dive into
Speaker 1: your word. I'm going to learn more about you. Oh
Speaker 1: by the way, God, some healing on this knee would
Speaker 1: be great, But if you don't. If you don't heal
Speaker 1: this knee, then let me see what you're trying to
Speaker 1: show me through this pain. Open my eyes to what
Speaker 1: this kind of this kind of tribulation, what this adversity
Speaker 1: is doing to make me stronger for you. Let me
Speaker 1: see that God, you see what I mean. Maria, there's
Speaker 1: a difference, right, instead of yeah, I don't honest, I
Speaker 1: asked God to heal. He didn't heal. With that, I
Speaker 1: just think he doesn't exist. Sounds like you're a victim.
Speaker 1: What a way to start. I got a way off
Speaker 1: on that one. Guys, I'm sorry. Let me just come
Speaker 1: and jump into the next one. No septic, come the
Speaker 1: next one, says Hey, Graandard like to stay anonymous here.
Speaker 1: I'm fourteen, living in a small town in California. I'm
Speaker 1: not allowed to date, but I have a friend who
Speaker 1: I have a crush on. We don't really talk, and
Speaker 1: I know that she recently went through a breakup, and
Speaker 1: I'm not sure if I should try to avoid her
Speaker 1: without being rude, or if I should try to get
Speaker 1: a little bit closer to her or just leave it.
Speaker 1: I'm not allowed to have girls' phone numbers for the
Speaker 1: next year or so, but I don't know how to
Speaker 1: handle these feelings. The way I feel about her isn't
Speaker 1: from the way she looks, but I've seen some from
Speaker 1: her personality. She's very kind, but I'm not allowed to
Speaker 1: date until I move out. If you could give me
Speaker 1: some advice would be awesome. God bless Hey, anonymous to
Speaker 1: fourteen in California, thank you for emailing, And Hey, I
Speaker 1: think that's really cool. I think you have some great
Speaker 1: parents that are your parents, legitimately love you and they
Speaker 1: want to protect you, and they want to prepare you
Speaker 1: for the world. And I think if they're telling you
Speaker 1: not to date, I think that that's a legitimate rule
Speaker 1: in your house that you should follow. And it sounds
Speaker 1: like you are, So kudos to that, buddy, and I'm
Speaker 1: happy that you're listening to the podcast. I think you're
Speaker 1: probably a great kid from what I get from this email.
Speaker 1: And so that leads to a pretty decent question. You know,
Speaker 1: my parents said I can't date, but I have a
Speaker 1: crush on a girl. So how do I do it?
Speaker 1: What do I do with this? Like where do we
Speaker 1: go from here? It's a great question because what you
Speaker 1: can't suppress your feelings. You can't say I don't have
Speaker 1: a crush on her, and like some kind of mind
Speaker 1: jedi mind tricks going to make it just go away.
Speaker 1: And at the same time, I want to address something
Speaker 1: you asked here. You said, should I just try to
Speaker 1: avoid her without being rude? No, I don't think that's
Speaker 1: the answer. I think you know what, I think. I
Speaker 1: think this is a great conversation to have with your
Speaker 1: mom and dad. I think it's like, hey, mom and Dad,
Speaker 1: you told me I can't date till I move out.
Speaker 1: I respect the house rules, and I understand that you
Speaker 1: make these kind of rules because you love me. I
Speaker 1: have a crush on this girl. Can you guys give
Speaker 1: me some advice on what to do with this because
Speaker 1: I really like her and it's not based all on
Speaker 1: look of course, it's got to be a little bit
Speaker 1: on looks, buddy, but it's not based on looks. She
Speaker 1: has a great, sweet personality. Mom and Dad, where do
Speaker 1: we go from here? And it could so then they're like, well,
Speaker 1: how about we take we have some escorted group times,
Speaker 1: set the movies, or we go to eat dinner with
Speaker 1: your friends and her friends and me and your mom.
Speaker 1: But maybe there's some kind of compromise in there. I
Speaker 1: don't think the compromise is just a void her like
Speaker 1: that's that probably could lead to bad things. In fact,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't do that, because you could. If you suppress
Speaker 1: it too much, you might just go crazy. And I
Speaker 1: think it's also it's as embarrassing as it might be
Speaker 1: it's a conversation you have with her. It's like, Hey,
Speaker 1: I'm really embarrassed to say this, but I really like
Speaker 1: you and I don't know what to do with it
Speaker 1: because I'm not allowed to date. But maybe we could
Speaker 1: just talk and see where this goes, and maybe in
Speaker 1: a few years we could date. I mean, I just
Speaker 1: think being vulnerable and being honest like this is a
Speaker 1: good bet. It's a good safe bet, and it puts
Speaker 1: honesty out on the table, It puts integrity forefront, and
Speaker 1: you just you have these kind of open conversations instead
Speaker 1: of kind of disappear and she's like, man, what happened
Speaker 1: to my friend? He just gone? He just disappeared. And
Speaker 1: then in a few years you're back all excited. So yeah,
Speaker 1: I have these conversations and have them soon. Next question,
Speaker 1: Subdecline says tragedy and feeling lost. Hey, grand your my
Speaker 1: name is Chad, thirty six years old. I'm from southern Ohio. First,
Speaker 1: I want to say I've only been listening for a week,
Speaker 1: but I love the podcast. I started back on your
Speaker 1: one hundredth episode and I've been listening as often as
Speaker 1: I can. Recently, through a friend, I was introduced to
Speaker 1: a woman, and we instantly connected. This is a woman
Speaker 1: of God that I've been praying for my entire life.
Speaker 1: On October eighteenth, she was tragically passed away in a
Speaker 1: car accident, one week before her thirty first birthday. Because
Speaker 1: we lived two hours apart, we didn't get to have
Speaker 1: a first date because of scheduling issues. But we would
Speaker 1: talk on the phone for hours and hours. I'm talking
Speaker 1: five or six hours a night, and those conversations were
Speaker 1: primarily a Bible study that the two of us were
Speaker 1: doing together. We would use the Bible app and read
Speaker 1: through various books and discuss them with each other. We
Speaker 1: were having the normal conversations and learning about each other,
Speaker 1: but a huge part of our relationship was centered around God.
Speaker 1: I fell in love with her instantly. Through conversations with
Speaker 1: our mutual friend, I found out that we were on
Speaker 1: the same page with how we felt about each other
Speaker 1: and that we were the answer to each other's prayers.
Speaker 1: She loved Jesus so much and had a fire and
Speaker 1: her to serve others and spread the love of God
Speaker 1: to everyone. She was the love of my life. I
Speaker 1: couldn't wait to serve God with her hand in hand.
Speaker 1: What I'm really struggling with is how do I heal
Speaker 1: from this? I know that she would want me to
Speaker 1: continue to lean into God, but I cannot see where
Speaker 1: this plan is having her work. Where the plan is
Speaker 1: having her leave so many loved ones behind and taking
Speaker 1: her while she was actively recruiting more followers for God.
Speaker 1: She leaves behind a seven year old daughter, and this
Speaker 1: added another level of anger for me. She was a
Speaker 1: warrior for God, and I feel so upset that she
Speaker 1: didn't get to have the marriage, more kids, and the
Speaker 1: family that she desired so much. She went through a
Speaker 1: lot of pain and abuse and past relationships, and she
Speaker 1: deserved to be loved unconditionally. I am angry, but I
Speaker 1: am not blaming God. How do I heal from losing
Speaker 1: the love of my life before we could make any
Speaker 1: lasting memories together? Thank you for any advice you can give.
Speaker 1: God has loved Chad all right, Chad Man, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1: That is a that is a tough, tough situation, and
Speaker 1: I'm sure you were just devastated, and I'm sure your
Speaker 1: heart broken, and I'm sure you lay in bed at
Speaker 1: night and think about her and what could have been.
Speaker 1: And I think there's probably a feeling that you have
Speaker 1: that you you know, you kind of go to the
Speaker 1: funeral and to everyone, to everyone at the funeral, you're
Speaker 1: just another face mourning this girl. But only you know
Speaker 1: deep down that you were way more than just that.
Speaker 1: You're more than just a phase like you you were
Speaker 1: going to marry this girl, and you you kind of
Speaker 1: want to shout from the rooftops to everyone, like this
Speaker 1: girl loved me and I loved her. I loved her,
Speaker 1: but we have nothing to prove physically for it on
Speaker 1: this earth. I'm sure that's kind of part of it,
Speaker 1: right that you there was no declaration to the world
Speaker 1: about this girl, and so I have sympathy for you.
Speaker 1: And it's a tough situation. But I want to dig
Speaker 1: in a little bit, okay, because that's what we do
Speaker 1: on this podcast. And if you email me, you kind
Speaker 1: of expect I'm gonna take and I'm gonna dig and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna twist a little bit. Okay. Now here's the thing.
Speaker 1: Here's the thing you signed off. God is love, which
Speaker 1: he is, but that's not his only attribute. He's also merciful,
Speaker 1: he's also just, he's also all knowing. He's also forgiving.
Speaker 1: He's also Holy. Those are just a fraction of his attributes,
Speaker 1: but Holy really encompasses a lot meaning Almighty in the
Speaker 1: beginning in the end, he is everything, all planning, all knowing,
Speaker 1: all preparing. There is nothing that slips past him. There's
Speaker 1: nothing that he doesn't know. There's nothing that he doesn't
Speaker 1: work for good. There's nothing that he doesn't work for love,
Speaker 1: not in a way we define good, not in a
Speaker 1: way that we define love. Right, he defines it. He
Speaker 1: is it. So then we define our good and our
Speaker 1: love based on his glory. Now that's hard to totally understand,
Speaker 1: but it puts us on a track where we know
Speaker 1: I don't get to define love, I don't get to
Speaker 1: define good. And that's how that's the lens we look
Speaker 1: to the world with. We define it the way the
Speaker 1: Bible does. So here's where I want to dig on you.
Speaker 1: You're speaking, you're speaking in terms first of all that
Speaker 1: sounds like God didn't know this was going to happen,
Speaker 1: or God planned it and it wasn't right, and you
Speaker 1: can't see how it was right. You're also looking at it,
Speaker 1: and I see this so many times in these emails.
Speaker 1: You're looking at life through a lens that our earthly
Speaker 1: presence is who we are, and it's not true if
Speaker 1: you're a believer. Well, no matter who you are, and
Speaker 1: let me put it that way. This life we live
Speaker 1: on Earth, in this flesh, and this body is a
Speaker 1: tiny blip, a tiny breath, a tiny vapor compared to
Speaker 1: our eternal life that we're going to have after this.
Speaker 1: Now we go to one or two locations after this,
Speaker 1: but we all have eternal life. So you're looking at
Speaker 1: this as as though she had everything to do on
Speaker 1: this planet Earth in her lifetime and now that's just ruined,
Speaker 1: as if she didn't go home. That's what that's the
Speaker 1: whole thing you missed in this email is that she
Speaker 1: went home like you said. You said she was a
Speaker 1: warrior for God, and I feel upset that she didn't
Speaker 1: get to have the marriage, more kids in the family
Speaker 1: that she desired. She went through a lot of pain
Speaker 1: and abuse and past relationships, and she deserved to be
Speaker 1: loved unconditionally. What you didn't say was but now she's home.
Speaker 1: She's home. None of that matters at all. Mission accomplished,
Speaker 1: race finished, She is with her Creator, she is with
Speaker 1: the Lord. If she was a believer, she is home.
Speaker 1: There is nothing bothering her. There is no regrets, there
Speaker 1: is no problems, there is no no position that she
Speaker 1: missed out on at all. Like if she's home, she
Speaker 1: was here briefly and now she is home. That's that's
Speaker 1: you miss that in your whole email. Okay, So that's
Speaker 1: that's that. That's her. Okay, Now we shift to you.
Speaker 1: Let's talk about you for a second. You're looking at
Speaker 1: this whole situation as if now I'm putting words to this,
Speaker 1: but you're looking at it as if she was the
Speaker 1: perfect girl for you that God planned and then God
Speaker 1: messed it up. What in the world did he do
Speaker 1: that for? He set you up with this perfect girl
Speaker 1: that was supposed to be the love of your life,
Speaker 1: and then this happened. What a wreck, what a mess,
Speaker 1: what an accident? And that's not what happened. Why how
Speaker 1: do I know that? Well, the Bible says God is
Speaker 1: all knowing, all planning, all purposeful, You sovereign over everything.
Speaker 1: So let me just say this lightly to you out
Speaker 1: of love. She was not the love of your life.
Speaker 1: How would I possibly know that because she's gone because
Speaker 1: you didn't marry her. So the reality of that tells
Speaker 1: me the reality of what your future is. There's somebody else.
Speaker 1: There is somebody else for you that could be blowing
Speaker 1: your mind right now if you've never thought about it.
Speaker 1: But there's somebody else for you that is the one
Speaker 1: love of your life. So instead of asking why, God,
Speaker 1: why why'd you do this? Why? Why God? Why the
Speaker 1: perfect situation? Why did you do this? Instead of saying that,
Speaker 1: move it to what what are you trying to show me? God?
Speaker 1: What did you show me through her that I need
Speaker 1: to know for the one you have prepared for me? Next?
Speaker 1: Have you thought about that? We have to think eternal minded,
Speaker 1: not earthly minded, not finite minded. Think big, think bigger,
Speaker 1: think long term. Okay, that's where we got to go. Chat.
Speaker 1: We'll take a break and be right back. Well, my
Speaker 1: brand new album moon Rise is available right now. You
Speaker 1: could stream it, you could buy it. You could listen
Speaker 1: to it on YouTube wherever you love to find and
Speaker 1: stream and by music wherever that might be. Moon Rise
Speaker 1: is out. I would love for you to go and
Speaker 1: listen to it and let me know which songs you
Speaker 1: like the best. That helps me as I'm building my
Speaker 1: set list and building my concerts for twenty twenty three.
Speaker 1: Also The new movie moon Rise, which the album is four,
Speaker 1: comes out December fifteenth on Pureflix. I don't know if
Speaker 1: you remember, you guys that were watching this podcast back
Speaker 1: about eight months ago when I had a beard and
Speaker 1: I was doing the podcast with the beard. It was
Speaker 1: it was for making this movie called moon Rise. And
Speaker 1: now it's all finished and I get to see it,
Speaker 1: you know, come to Fruition with all the music and
Speaker 1: everything together. So I'm just excited for you guys to
Speaker 1: consume this and let me know what you think of
Speaker 1: the movie and the songs for the movie altogether. It's
Speaker 1: just a really exciting time in our family's life. And ultimately,
Speaker 1: I just hope it gives you enjoyment. I hope it
Speaker 1: adds value to your life in some way as a distraction,
Speaker 1: a much needed distraction, or a release in some way,
Speaker 1: to something to lift you emotionally. As an artist, that's
Speaker 1: all we could ever hope for. You know, this is
Speaker 1: my eleventh album, and as I step away from all
Speaker 1: of it, it's the things that were most meaningful to people,
Speaker 1: that added value to their lives. That's what's long lasting
Speaker 1: for me over the last twenty years of making albums.
Speaker 1: So I hope it becomes part of the thread of
Speaker 1: your life and whatever you're doing this holiday season. I
Speaker 1: hope that Moonrise, the album, and the movie is all
Speaker 1: part of it. Back to the podcast. Welcome back to
Speaker 1: the podcast. Let's get to another question here. Subject line
Speaker 1: on this one says sex before marriage. Good morning, Grangeer.
Speaker 1: My name is Andres from Mansfield, Texas. Loved you and
Speaker 1: your amazing family and your fire and your pursuit of
Speaker 1: God has definitely helped me, and it's definitely helping me
Speaker 1: in so many ways. My question is, is sex before
Speaker 1: marriage okay if you know you want to marry the
Speaker 1: woman you're with. My girlfriend and I are both followers
Speaker 1: of Christ, and I've into and have intimate, faith filled
Speaker 1: talks about this subject, and we find ourselves starting up
Speaker 1: each other's engines and not stepping on the gas good analogy.
Speaker 1: I don't think it fair on my end to do
Speaker 1: that to her, even though it's mutual. But I also
Speaker 1: don't want her to feel like I don't want her
Speaker 1: in that way and lose the fire we do fire.
Speaker 1: I think I think I'm tracking with you here. I
Speaker 1: love and deeply respect her very much, but putting God
Speaker 1: before my own needs is why I'm asking this question.
Speaker 1: Thank you for listening, and sorry for not keeping it short.
Speaker 1: Can't wait for your next sermon. Ye yee, all right
Speaker 1: andres thanks for the question, buddy. So sometimes on these questions,
Speaker 1: I just roll with an opinion, Like if you say,
Speaker 1: I'm thinking about moving to Tennessee, or I'm thinking about
Speaker 1: changing jobs, or we're trying to save some money, and
Speaker 1: how could we collect our finances, you know whatever, that's all.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give you my educated guests, my opinions. But
Speaker 1: when it comes to something like this, I don't have
Speaker 1: to guess. I don't have to give you an opinion.
Speaker 1: I just tell you straight out of the Bible. No,
Speaker 1: you're not gonna have sex before marriage. Why what is
Speaker 1: that your opinion, Granger, No, it's not my opinion, it's
Speaker 1: just what the Bible says. Thank goodness, I don't have
Speaker 1: to rely on opinion on something that's really sensitive like this.
Speaker 1: So here's the deal, you say, I mean, I can
Speaker 1: make this super simple. I could talk for ten minutes
Speaker 1: about this, or I could talk for twenty seconds. But
Speaker 1: you say, is it okay to have sex before marriage?
Speaker 1: If you know that you want to marry the woman
Speaker 1: you're with. Let me flip that around for you and
Speaker 1: rephrase the question, dear granger, if I know the woman
Speaker 1: I'm going to marry, then why have I not married
Speaker 1: her yet? That's it? Why have you not married Andre's?
Speaker 1: If you know she's the one you're gonna be with
Speaker 1: and you're struggling with desire and lust, what are you
Speaker 1: waiting on? It's as simple as that, I mean, is it?
Speaker 1: Don't Please don't tell me you're waiting like on a
Speaker 1: venue or they're trying to book the nice little whatever
Speaker 1: venue to get married, or she's got to have the
Speaker 1: perfect dress. I think that's so that's such a modern
Speaker 1: day thing as having this elaborate wedding. I'm just totally
Speaker 1: throwing that out there. Maybe that's not it at all,
Speaker 1: Maybe it's something totally different, but I'm just asking you, Andre's,
Speaker 1: if she's the one, then get married and then that
Speaker 1: intimate relationship gets so much more special when you give
Speaker 1: her that gift. That's a gift that you're giving her
Speaker 1: and she's giving you back. That's a gift of waiting,
Speaker 1: and it makes it so much more special. And if
Speaker 1: you're having problems with that now, then you either rush
Speaker 1: that date and get it here soon, or really you
Speaker 1: need to restrict the time that you're around her. I
Speaker 1: can go through every other podcast email I get with problems.
Speaker 1: If you don't listen to my advice, their problems come. Okay,
Speaker 1: problems in some way, shape or form happen if you
Speaker 1: don't take this advice. There's a million problems that could
Speaker 1: happen if you don't take this advice. Thank goodness, I'm
Speaker 1: not the one giving it. The Bible does. The Bible
Speaker 1: doesn't do it because it's handcuffing, restricting us, giving us
Speaker 1: these awkward rules that just go against our flesh. It's
Speaker 1: doing it. It's giving us these rules for our own good,
Speaker 1: so that we could thrive, so that we could prosper,
Speaker 1: so we could benefit from it. Why because the creator
Speaker 1: made the rules that also made us so. It's like
Speaker 1: the instruction manual that comes with us. It's like if
Speaker 1: I get a if I get a Ford truck from
Speaker 1: the factory, and I drive the Ford around and I go, man,
Speaker 1: this is a gas truck. But I wonder if I
Speaker 1: could put diesel in it. I wonder, I mean, it
Speaker 1: would be so much more convenient just to put diesel
Speaker 1: in it. Because my tractor's diesel and my wife's car
Speaker 1: is diesel. So if I could just put diesel in
Speaker 1: this truck, it would really solve some problems. And I
Speaker 1: could only I can only get gas cans that have
Speaker 1: diesel in it. That would make it my life easier.
Speaker 1: So I'm just gonna do diesel. So you email Ford
Speaker 1: and Ford's like, no, put gasoline in it. So at
Speaker 1: what point do you go? All right? Ford? I know
Speaker 1: that you said I need to put gas in it,
Speaker 1: and you made me, and you made the vehicle, you
Speaker 1: know whatever. So I'm just gonna go against what you said.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go ahead and put diesel in it, and
Speaker 1: then the whole engine ruins. You get my point. I
Speaker 1: mean that's elaborate, but that's my point. Andre's just wait
Speaker 1: for a thousand reasons. Just wait. Next question, subject line
Speaker 1: A Timeline advice question. Hey Grangeur, I'd like to remain anonymous.
Speaker 1: I've been listening for a while now, just wanted to
Speaker 1: get your advice on something. My brother is currently going
Speaker 1: through a miscarriage and I was wondering what is your
Speaker 1: advice to help him and his wife get through this.
Speaker 1: They have two kids right now. By the way, I'm
Speaker 1: a huge fan, have been following you since you were
Speaker 1: since about twenty eleven. I think my question for you
Speaker 1: is this, Thank you very much. I hope to meet
Speaker 1: you very soon. Waned up up here in Buffalo, New York. Well,
Speaker 1: thank you anonymous, and I hope to meet you too
Speaker 1: in Buffalo. Thanks for the question, Thanks for listening. And
Speaker 1: miscarriages are tough. Amber and I had one right before math,
Speaker 1: after riv and before math. And if your question you
Speaker 1: said your brother, the question is for the brother, and
Speaker 1: so from that perspective, from the male perspective, I could understand,
Speaker 1: and I would say this to him if I were you,
Speaker 1: Just be there for her whatever she needs. As guys,
Speaker 1: we can't possibly understand what a miscarriage means emotionally, physically, spiritually,
Speaker 1: we don't. We can't possibly understand as a dad, as
Speaker 1: a husband, and so the best thing we could do
Speaker 1: is just be whatever they need. I'm here for you.
Speaker 1: I'm not going to ignore the situation. They might take
Speaker 1: it pretty bad, like a lot of women take this
Speaker 1: very bad. And so with the two other kids I
Speaker 1: was in that situation. We had two other kids, and
Speaker 1: our kids our kids knew that we were pregnant, so
Speaker 1: we knew that we were going to try again after
Speaker 1: the miscarriage, and we didn't want to tell them at
Speaker 1: the time that we weren't pregnant because we didn't want
Speaker 1: to break their heart again. Because of that, we hid
Speaker 1: the miscarriage from them, which was difficult because it's very
Speaker 1: painful and was spending long amounts of time just cramping
Speaker 1: in the bathroom, just laying on the floor. You're basically
Speaker 1: having a pregnancy. And so my job in that situation
Speaker 1: was distract the kids, keep them away, keep their spirits lifted.
Speaker 1: Also being there for Amber. What she needs. She needed ice, water,
Speaker 1: she needs another towel, you know, whatever she needed, just there,
Speaker 1: just there to talk, just there emotionally for her. So
Speaker 1: I will say the healer in this that I've seen
Speaker 1: is time, just time. Just gotta let some time go by.
Speaker 1: And it's never going to go away for her completely,
Speaker 1: but you just got to let some time go by.
Speaker 1: It's never gonna be easy right now. You're not gonna
Speaker 1: get a quick fix out of this. Be there for her.
Speaker 1: Let's hit another one here, subject line, how to be
Speaker 1: more outgoing? Hey Gradumin Kyle I'm twenty two, two years old.
Speaker 1: I'm a farmer from northwest Iowa. I love the podcast.
Speaker 1: I listen to it on the tractor a lot. I'm
Speaker 1: a pretty shy person around people I don't know very well,
Speaker 1: and I'm pretty sure that's why I've only ever been
Speaker 1: in one relationship. I don't get out a whole lot,
Speaker 1: and that worries me because I know a woman isn't
Speaker 1: just going to walk onto the farm one day and
Speaker 1: want to get married. When I do go out, I
Speaker 1: never work up the courage to go and talk to
Speaker 1: a girl that I find good looking. I don't know
Speaker 1: what to say without being weird, and I get too
Speaker 1: nervous and just watch it slip through my fingers. Any
Speaker 1: advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks Kyle, Kyle, thanks for
Speaker 1: the email, Buddy, appreciate you. I hear you. I'm listening
Speaker 1: shout out to Iowa. And let me say before I
Speaker 1: start answering your question, Kyle, let me say, girls, listen up. Girls.
Speaker 1: You know how many times we have girls that say
Speaker 1: there's no good guys out there, There's only bad guys.
Speaker 1: There's only bad boys, and everyone wants to just party
Speaker 1: and hit on me and say say bad pickup lines
Speaker 1: to me. But the good guys never, they never aren't
Speaker 1: they never are attracted to me. Good guys never come
Speaker 1: and talk to me. It must be me. I must
Speaker 1: be unattractive. So are you here and Kyle, because this happens.
Speaker 1: And for every guy that you don't like, or for
Speaker 1: every guy that you don't think talks to you, girl,
Speaker 1: there's a Kyle out there that's shy, that's a farmer
Speaker 1: that doesn't get socialized too much because he's on the tractor.
Speaker 1: And by the way, Kyle, thank you for your service
Speaker 1: providing food on our table so that we could have
Speaker 1: great food. But girls, there's a guy like Kyle out
Speaker 1: there that's in the corner and he's too shy because
Speaker 1: he's been on the tractor all day and it doesn't
Speaker 1: really know and he doesn't know what to say that
Speaker 1: you might like. Maybe he grew up like me with brothers.
Speaker 1: I have no idea. I had no ideas as a
Speaker 1: teenager in my young twenties. I had no idea what
Speaker 1: a girl wanted to hear or what a girl liked.
Speaker 1: I grew up with brothers. I had no clue. So
Speaker 1: I just wanted to show here girls that there's guys
Speaker 1: like Kyle that every once in a while you might
Speaker 1: have to go and be like, Hey, I'm Amanda, what's
Speaker 1: your name. I've seen you in here a couple of times.
Speaker 1: What's your name? Can I buy you a drink? If
Speaker 1: that's what you do? And then that helps take the
Speaker 1: pressure off Kyle. So there's that, and then Kyle back
Speaker 1: to you, buddy, I just want to say, first of all,
Speaker 1: there's no rush, there's no urgency, there's no problem. But
Speaker 1: that being said, I recognize that you see it as
Speaker 1: a problem, and I don't think it's bad that you do.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm gonna sit with you for a second
Speaker 1: with and acknowledge that that's a legitimate idea that you have.
Speaker 1: That maybe I'm just gonna be an old man on
Speaker 1: this farm and never meet a girl, because what's it
Speaker 1: gonna take for a girl to walk up on this farm?
Speaker 1: Like am I gonna be literally on the tractor and
Speaker 1: a girl just comes walking through the field and I
Speaker 1: love her and we get married. These are the thoughts
Speaker 1: that you're having. These are the thoughts that keep you
Speaker 1: up at night. But we look back in humanity for
Speaker 1: thousands of years it has just worked out Somehow do
Speaker 1: you ever think about whenever you hear like a story
Speaker 1: about like a crazy snow leopard or something, and there's
Speaker 1: only a few snow leopards in the whole region, and
Speaker 1: somehow these snow leopards find each other. You know, It's like,
Speaker 1: how does this female snow leopard find this male snow
Speaker 1: leopard over the course of two hundred square miles and
Speaker 1: somehow they just walk up on each other one day
Speaker 1: or smell each other from a couple miles away. How
Speaker 1: does that work? Humans are the same thing. We somehow
Speaker 1: just find each other. How do you do it? Well?
Speaker 1: You keep your eyes open, which they are. And the
Speaker 1: good thing to do is just be asking friends, Like
Speaker 1: friends could recommend girls to you. Friends have sisters, and
Speaker 1: sisters have friends, and bridesmaids have friends, and this big
Speaker 1: circuit goes out, and hey, man, I've been to Iowa
Speaker 1: many times. There's a lot of pretty girls in Iowa.
Speaker 1: So you're in a great place for that. I love Iowa.
Speaker 1: By the way. I think me and Amber, if we
Speaker 1: weren't living in Texas and we didn't have family in Texas,
Speaker 1: maybe we'd go get us a white house with a
Speaker 1: red barn and farms some corn in Iowa or something
Speaker 1: like that. But man, I'm here just to reinforce that.
Speaker 1: First of all, I understand what you're feeling. And second
Speaker 1: of all, you're twenty two. Man, You're totally good. Be single, content,
Speaker 1: don't be looking for it. Go to church, sing a hymn,
Speaker 1: sing your heart out, praise God, and somebody will walk
Speaker 1: up in your life. Maybe not physically on the farm,
Speaker 1: but they will. I guarantee you, Kyle, I will bet anything.
Speaker 1: Then in ten years you email me back. In ten years,
Speaker 1: you're going to have a baby mama with two kids
Speaker 1: and a big old gold ring on your finger, and
Speaker 1: you're gonna be happily married. Let's jump into another one.
Speaker 1: This one subject line says leaving home behind. Hey, Grangdred
Speaker 1: like to stay anonymous. I moved to Texas about six
Speaker 1: years ago. I love Texas, but I have the feeling
Speaker 1: that God is leading me to a different state. Recently,
Speaker 1: after having that feeling, a bunch of my old friends
Speaker 1: in Alabama messaged me that I haven't talked to in years.
Speaker 1: We all started talking as if we never left, and
Speaker 1: I also began thinking about moving back. The thing is
Speaker 1: that the majority of my family is here in Texas,
Speaker 1: and I know I'll miss him, but I want to
Speaker 1: start my own life and see where God leaves me.
Speaker 1: But I'm scared of leaving my family. Love your music
Speaker 1: and your podcast. Thanks Anonymous, Appreciate you. Brother. I want
Speaker 1: to say, I don't think this is God talking to
Speaker 1: you here. I think you just have a little wild hair,
Speaker 1: you have a little gypsy soul, little bit. It sounds
Speaker 1: like you moved to Texas six years ago from Alabama. Right,
Speaker 1: I'm filling in the blanks here. You probably moved from
Speaker 1: Alabama and you just miss it and you haven't really
Speaker 1: made friends in Texas that have the deep bond that
Speaker 1: you had with your friends in Alabama. Totally understandable. Nothing
Speaker 1: wrong with that, nothing out of the ordinary. Now you
Speaker 1: have family here in Texas and that's holding you back.
Speaker 1: Nothing out of the ordinary for that either. I don't
Speaker 1: think God has anything well, God has everything to do
Speaker 1: with everything, but in this specific situation, I think you're
Speaker 1: putting pressure on this like God is mysteriously leading you
Speaker 1: on this mysterious path back to Alabama, and I think
Speaker 1: it's just not that spiritual. I think this is like well,
Speaker 1: I just miss my friends. So here's the thing I
Speaker 1: would say. Here's what I would say. You could just
Speaker 1: go and visit Alabama and spend spend a week there
Speaker 1: with your friends. And when you're there, I don't know
Speaker 1: how old you are, I don't know what you've got
Speaker 1: going on. I'd so you spend a week there, and
Speaker 1: you talk to some people about jobs. You talk to
Speaker 1: some people about a living situation, check out the town.
Speaker 1: You talk to your friends about what it would be
Speaker 1: like to move back there. You weigh your options, do
Speaker 1: some math, see what it would cost, see how hard
Speaker 1: it would be to move, Talk to your family, see
Speaker 1: what they say. Okay, so then say, some of this
Speaker 1: stuff lines up right, What if you did this? What
Speaker 1: if you went for a summer and so, I'm going
Speaker 1: to go for two months and stay with my buddies
Speaker 1: in Alabama. One of them's got a part time job
Speaker 1: I can jump on, make a little cash. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: sleep on my buddy's couch, and I'm gonna see how
Speaker 1: it is. You're not married to the idea. You're not
Speaker 1: signing a five month mortgage or something crazy. You're just
Speaker 1: going and sleeping on a couch and hanging out seeing
Speaker 1: If Alabama suits you again, that's what you do. Take
Speaker 1: it in small steps. Then in sixty days one or
Speaker 1: two things are gonna happen. You're gonna go. I love
Speaker 1: it here. I could visit my family anytime. But I
Speaker 1: love my friends, I love Alabama. I've got a good
Speaker 1: lined up, a really good job, and a good place
Speaker 1: to stay. Or two. The other option is man I
Speaker 1: stayed in sixty days in Alabama. I just missed my
Speaker 1: family too much. I got to be back around him again.
Speaker 1: I can't be away this long and then you know done.
Speaker 1: You don't have to over spiritualize. It's just trial and error.
Speaker 1: There's nothing wrong. You don't have to make a full
Speaker 1: time commitment. Let's grab another one here, subject line lost child,
Speaker 1: Could you help. My name is Brett Senyored. My wife
Speaker 1: and I lost our six year old son in an
Speaker 1: ATV accident about a month ago. My wife and I
Speaker 1: are both God fearing Christians that love the Lord. We
Speaker 1: have trusted God to carry us through and guide our
Speaker 1: path to align with His will. I love that, by
Speaker 1: the way, good wording. After a month, it is still
Speaker 1: so hard every day with reminders everywhere of our son,
Speaker 1: we know that we must remain strong for our son,
Speaker 1: who is two years old. How did you guys cope
Speaker 1: in the months after y'all's loss. Any insight would be helpful.
Speaker 1: Thanks Brett, Brett, I am so so sorry about this.
Speaker 1: There's only there's only one thing I loved how you
Speaker 1: worded your email. There's only one word I don't like,
Speaker 1: and I want to encourage you with a word. Okay,
Speaker 1: you use the word accident. But if you say you
Speaker 1: and your wife are both God freeing Christians and love
Speaker 1: the Lord, which I believe that you do, and you
Speaker 1: trust God to carry through and align your past to
Speaker 1: his will, which I believe. Your sin saying that if
Speaker 1: you believe all that, then there is no accidents. There
Speaker 1: is no accidents, There is only God's purpose. I want
Speaker 1: you to chew on that. That's hard, it's hard to digest.
Speaker 1: But I want you to chew on that, meditate on
Speaker 1: that idea that there are no accidents, because that helps
Speaker 1: open things up for you a little bit. Because if
Speaker 1: you think accident, you think like spilled milk, Like, oh no,
Speaker 1: I just spilled the milk, then it's everywhere. I got
Speaker 1: to clean it up. It's a wreckin here. I want
Speaker 1: you to think more in terms of this was a
Speaker 1: calculated purpose. It first, that idea stings because you go,
Speaker 1: what purpose is this? This is a terrible purpose. And
Speaker 1: I get it. I would hear you and say, yeah,
Speaker 1: I get it. I get it. But at the end
Speaker 1: of the day, it's a lot more comforting knowing I
Speaker 1: have a God that has everything in his hands and
Speaker 1: nothing slips asked him. There are no accidents, there's nothing
Speaker 1: that he couldn't stop, there's nothing that he just Oh,
Speaker 1: I loved your son, but I just I couldn't stop him,
Speaker 1: or I didn't know it was coming. That's just that
Speaker 1: that that is way more haunting of an idea instead
Speaker 1: of wrestling with the thought that God had everything under
Speaker 1: control in this situation, and if he did, what does
Speaker 1: that mean for me? Because it's great news for my son.
Speaker 1: Because we don't think about, oh, he could have been
Speaker 1: a senior prompt. Remember the question I read earlier about
Speaker 1: this the girl that died, and I read that question
Speaker 1: in the same episode, right, So it's the same idea
Speaker 1: that we don't mourn for the girl, we don't mourn
Speaker 1: for your son. It's in terms of, oh, he could
Speaker 1: have been running track or he could. This would have
Speaker 1: been his eighteenth birthday. He would have loved it. He
Speaker 1: deserved to have an eighteenth birthday party. No, no, he's
Speaker 1: with it. He's with his creator. He's in the glory
Speaker 1: right now. So he's good. He doesn't deserve anything else
Speaker 1: because he has it all. He's got everything fulfilled perfectly
Speaker 1: right now. It's us. We're the problem. We're the ones
Speaker 1: that have to deal with the pain. So we need
Speaker 1: to look at ourselves right in this situation, not him.
Speaker 1: We don't mourn because he's missing out. We don't mourn
Speaker 1: because the girl didn't get her family that she deserved.
Speaker 1: We don't think of it in that way. We think
Speaker 1: about it. Okay, what do we need to do. If
Speaker 1: this was a purpose, then what is our role in
Speaker 1: this purpose? What is this showing me? What does this
Speaker 1: mean for your two year old son that's still here?
Speaker 1: What purpose does he have? And God, what are you
Speaker 1: showing us in this so that we could be better,
Speaker 1: so that our family could be closer? Okay, that's fixing
Speaker 1: the word accident. I don't like the word accident. Now
Speaker 1: here's the thing directly answering your question. You said after
Speaker 1: a month. That's still so hard, every day with reminders
Speaker 1: everywhere of our son. How did you guys cope in
Speaker 1: the months after y'all's loss. Let me be blunt, badly, badly.
Speaker 1: That's how we coped. We stumbled, we fell, We mourned,
Speaker 1: we cried, We soaked our pillows with tears. We fumbled
Speaker 1: words and mumbled through conversations and daydreamed and got woken
Speaker 1: up with nightmares in the middle of the night. But
Speaker 1: we relied on every breath, the next one and the
Speaker 1: next one, and a minute would go by, and then
Speaker 1: an hour would go by, and then I would string
Speaker 1: together five hours and that was an accomplishment. And then
Speaker 1: the sun would go down and would come back up
Speaker 1: the next morning, another day come and god, and then
Speaker 1: it did that thirty times, and it was a month,
Speaker 1: and then two months. And if those intervals got too hard,
Speaker 1: we went breath by breath, And if a breath by
Speaker 1: breath was too hard, then we went heartbeat by heartbeat.
Speaker 1: It's like, I can't, I can't do it. I can't.
Speaker 1: I can't even survive one more breath, So I'll survive
Speaker 1: a heartbeat. Aim Low, No, you don't have to be
Speaker 1: the hero here. You don't have to. You know, you're
Speaker 1: not trying to accomplish anything. There's no merits or trophies
Speaker 1: given for how quickly can you get over grief? How
Speaker 1: good can you how fast can you get to good?
Speaker 1: There's no trophy for that, There's there's no time frame.
Speaker 1: So how did we cope? We relied on God? How
Speaker 1: do you do that? We stayed on our knees, prayed,
Speaker 1: read our Bibles together, cry it together. Sometimes Amber would
Speaker 1: be good and I was bad. Sometimes I'd be good,
Speaker 1: Amber was bad, and that could change like the wind.
Speaker 1: But here's the thing. My first month is going to
Speaker 1: be awful. So is the second. You get a little
Speaker 1: breathing room on month six, maybe month seven, Hey, it's
Speaker 1: not too bad. Month eight, back at square one, it's
Speaker 1: terrible again. Month nine seeing some light, and then all
Speaker 1: of a sudden, halfway through month nine you have a
Speaker 1: terrible day. It's a roller coaster. Grief comes in waves.
Speaker 1: You're in the trough, you're in the crest. You're in
Speaker 1: the trough, you're in the crest. Then you start recognizing, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm going back up, I'm going back to the crest.
Speaker 1: And then when you're on the crest. You know, hey,
Speaker 1: I better enjoy this crest right now because it might
Speaker 1: last five minutes or five days, but I'm going to
Speaker 1: be back in the trough and I'm gonna feel like
Speaker 1: there's nothing I could do. The world is ending, the
Speaker 1: walls are closing in the sky is falling. But then
Speaker 1: you know, because you've done it, and you've been in
Speaker 1: the wave before, you know when you're in the trough,
Speaker 1: you know eventually I'm going back up to the crest,
Speaker 1: because that's what the wave does. So you ride it
Speaker 1: and then you hit that one year mark boom. You've
Speaker 1: been looking at it so long, and you go through
Speaker 1: the holidays and Thanksgiving, Christmas, you do things like Easter,
Speaker 1: and you're missing your little boy. But then you string
Speaker 1: together another year. Then you put together another year and
Speaker 1: it does get easier. The grief doesn't go away, the
Speaker 1: sadness doesn't go away, but you just learn how to
Speaker 1: get used to it. It becomes a part of you
Speaker 1: and it doesn't wear you down. Instead, you use it
Speaker 1: as your power. What do you think I'm doing right now?
Speaker 1: It's what I'm exactly what I'm doing. I'm talking. I'm
Speaker 1: using that pain that has lived with me for almost
Speaker 1: four years now and then losing my dad add another
Speaker 1: eight years to that. I'm using that pain for you.
Speaker 1: That's why I'm sitting here doing this podcast. It's why
Speaker 1: I could smell. I could literally smell Amber's dinner that
Speaker 1: she made downstairs. I'm so excited to eat dinner. But
Speaker 1: I'm finishing this question with you because I'm using this
Speaker 1: pain for you. And one day you will do that.
Speaker 1: That's what you'll do one day and you'll stop asking God, why, why?
Speaker 1: Why the accident, and you'll say, what in your purpose
Speaker 1: do I need to see in your glory? Love you guys,
Speaker 1: love your questions. We'll see you next Monday. Ye. Thanks
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