WEBVTT - “I’VE BEEN BANNED”

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<v Speaker 1>Is this Lyle? Yes?

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<v Speaker 2>Who is this.

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<v Speaker 1>Hid Lyle?

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<v Speaker 2>My name is Goldie, Goldie. What's going on, Goldie? How's life? Oh?

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<v Speaker 1>Man, I'm actually I'm crying right now, but so not

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<v Speaker 1>the greatest at the moment.

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<v Speaker 2>You're quiet? Why are you? Why are you crying?

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<v Speaker 1>It's kind of silly. But so I'm an avid Twitch watcher, Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>I love to watch Twitch streams, and uh, I've actually

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<v Speaker 1>been watching you for probably like two or three years now. Cool,

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<v Speaker 1>So I'm a very big fan. I love your stream, dude.

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<v Speaker 1>But but uh, yeah, I'm actually crying because another person

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<v Speaker 1>that I watch on here? Can you just ban me? Yeah? Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>from his Twitter community because actually, as it turns out,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm already banned on Twitch, so I can't actually chat,

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<v Speaker 1>but I do listen, right, Okay, yeah, so but I

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<v Speaker 1>I just got banned from his Twitter community and I'm

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<v Speaker 1>crying about it.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, all right, let's well let's talk this through. Well,

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<v Speaker 2>first of all, why why did you Why do you

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<v Speaker 2>think you got banns?

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<v Speaker 1>So I have a lot to say. I'm kind of

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<v Speaker 1>I kind of talk too much, I guess, and I

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<v Speaker 1>kind of say some outlandish things sometimes, and I think

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<v Speaker 1>that he did not want me kind of speaking over

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<v Speaker 1>him in his chat.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, is this as like a small streamer.

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<v Speaker 1>Usually about like six hundred viewers a stream he has?

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, yeah, all right, I mean let's reverse engineer this

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<v Speaker 2>in a few ways, because why are you why are

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<v Speaker 2>you spending so much time talking in this guy's chat?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I mean they sometimes they call me a parasocial okay,

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<v Speaker 1>because yeah, I'm not exactly one hundred percent sure what

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<v Speaker 1>that means, but I think it's.

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<v Speaker 3>Like, like I where I believe that I'm closer to

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<v Speaker 3>him than I really am.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>A parasolic relationship is like a relationship that you form,

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<v Speaker 2>is like a one sided relationship you form with someone

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<v Speaker 2>that you don't know.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, that's definitely what I'm kind of doing. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't really have many Actually I don't have any friends

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<v Speaker 1>in real life.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh.

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<v Speaker 1>I kind of use twitch as a platform where I

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<v Speaker 1>can connect with people since I don't really have a

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<v Speaker 1>way to do that in real life.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, why do you feel like you don't have any friends?

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<v Speaker 1>Well, I'm a single mom, though I kind of lost

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<v Speaker 1>most of my friends after becoming a mom.

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<v Speaker 2>And then.

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<v Speaker 1>I never made any new ones after I lost all

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<v Speaker 1>my friends.

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<v Speaker 2>Where were your friends from? Like? Where or were they

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<v Speaker 2>from like high school?

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 3>Mostly?

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<v Speaker 1>Uh, high school. I never really had many friends, but

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<v Speaker 1>the few of them that I had were from school.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>M you know, I'm not fully opposed to using online

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<v Speaker 2>communities to make friends. I'm not fully opposed to it.

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<v Speaker 2>I think that Well, Like when I first was twitch streaming,

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<v Speaker 2>I was a little worried about parasocial relationships. I was

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<v Speaker 2>worried that people were like finding you know, I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>I don't think parasocial relationships are are They kind of

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<v Speaker 2>depend on intensity. I mean I have parasocial relationships with

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<v Speaker 2>people that I, you know, listen to a lot or

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<v Speaker 2>watch a lot, you know, I've you know, kind of

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<v Speaker 2>form ideas of who they are, and you know, they

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<v Speaker 2>they maybe uh their work speaks to me in ways

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<v Speaker 2>that make me feel very understood. But I don't I

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<v Speaker 2>don't ever, I don't let that go to to a

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<v Speaker 2>place where I like feel like they're you know, I

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<v Speaker 2>maybe have a reverence for their work and what they

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<v Speaker 2>have to say and whatnot. By I don't let that

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<v Speaker 2>cross into a territory of like they are part of

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<v Speaker 2>my social life in any way, shape or form. And

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<v Speaker 2>I was kind of worried about that when I first

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<v Speaker 2>started streaming, But then I I noticed on Discord and

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<v Speaker 2>even like in my twitch chat that people independent of

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<v Speaker 2>me were like making friends with each other, and that

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<v Speaker 2>became those became like, those weren't parasocial relationships. Those were

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<v Speaker 2>real uh you know, albeit online, but they were They

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<v Speaker 2>were real relationships that people formed with each other, and

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<v Speaker 2>I thought that was cool. And I'm not against that

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<v Speaker 2>because I've actually seen a lot of situations both you know,

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<v Speaker 2>in my Gecko universe and in like anecdotally in real

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<v Speaker 2>life where people have relationships like that that turn into

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<v Speaker 2>like real friendships. And I'm not I'm not opposed to that.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm opposed to like I'm opposed to like like making

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<v Speaker 2>friends with an AI chatbot or trying to feel like

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<v Speaker 2>a streamer is like your friends. But I I the

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<v Speaker 2>the space between of like, you know, I chat with

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<v Speaker 2>this person who lives in uh, Wisconsin, and I'm in

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<v Speaker 2>Florida or whatever. I don't think that that's all that bad.

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<v Speaker 2>And if that's where your life is and that's where

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<v Speaker 2>your comfortability is and that's where you need to start,

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<v Speaker 2>I don't think that that's the worst thing in the world.

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<v Speaker 2>But I guess ultimately you'd want to form a forign

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<v Speaker 2>friendships in real life. And it's I get why it's

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<v Speaker 2>I get why it's hard for you as a as

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<v Speaker 2>a single mom. You know, it's a lot of responsibility.

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<v Speaker 2>Is there a kid? Yes, By the way, you sound

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<v Speaker 2>like you're you sound like, uh, you sound like you're

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<v Speaker 2>out in Are you out in public somewhere?

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<v Speaker 1>No, I'm actually in my room. I'm pacing back and

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<v Speaker 1>forth in my room right now, and my little baby

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<v Speaker 1>just came in here and he wants me now, So I'm.

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<v Speaker 3>Like, okay.

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<v Speaker 1>But but about what you were saying is, yeah, like

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<v Speaker 1>the thing about the parasocial relationships is like there's no

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<v Speaker 1>form of like, uh the what's that word recipprosity? Yes, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>so there's no Really, I'm not really getting anything out

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<v Speaker 1>of these relationships of course, other than you know, it's

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<v Speaker 1>kind of like an imaginary relationship in a way. So

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<v Speaker 1>I definitely wish that I could find friends in real life.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm just like kind of like an awkward person, So

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know if I don't really know.

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<v Speaker 4>How to do that.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, you can find friends in real life even if

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<v Speaker 2>you're an awkward person. You, I really do you can

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<v Speaker 2>find friends in real life being exactly as you are,

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<v Speaker 2>because I don't like I think like real friendship is

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<v Speaker 2>mostly this is like really boring. But most friendship is

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<v Speaker 2>truthfully more about repeated exposure than it is about any

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<v Speaker 2>form of It's repeated exposure with like a little bit

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<v Speaker 2>of compatibility, but I think it's mainly about repeated exposure

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<v Speaker 2>than it is compatibility. And if you're awkward, but you

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<v Speaker 2>have repeated exposure with like the same group of people,

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<v Speaker 2>you'll be you'll start to you'll be less awkward because

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<v Speaker 2>you get more comfortable with them because of that repeated exposure.

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<v Speaker 2>So it's like, well, where do you get that repeated

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<v Speaker 2>exposure is the main question. And it's hard for you

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<v Speaker 2>because you got to you got a lot going on,

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<v Speaker 2>But uh yeah, it's possible, And it's possible to do

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<v Speaker 2>it online too. Like when you were in this guy's

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<v Speaker 2>Twitch community, were you were you just like sending our

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<v Speaker 2>messages to the void or were you talking to other people.

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<v Speaker 1>Mostly like I would. I would interact with the other

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<v Speaker 1>chatters once in a while, but I would mainly comment

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<v Speaker 1>on his stream and what he was doing, sometimes say

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<v Speaker 1>like jokes here and there. The guy that I was watching,

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<v Speaker 1>he kind of felt like the things that I would

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<v Speaker 1>say were me trying to like outshine him in a way,

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<v Speaker 1>I think, and he, I guess he wanted to, uh

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<v Speaker 1>basically had more control over his community and what was

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<v Speaker 1>being said in his chat. And I don't know, maybe

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<v Speaker 1>he just got the wrong idea about me. But yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>sorry if it doesn't make any sense.

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<v Speaker 2>No, it it makes perfect sense. But I don't think

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<v Speaker 2>but it's I don't think it's the thing to be

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<v Speaker 2>focused on, right because well, I mean what I what

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<v Speaker 2>I want to see, what I'd like to see for

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<v Speaker 2>you is to uh build up a better like social life,

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<v Speaker 2>whether it's on the internet with other real people or

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<v Speaker 2>with real people in real life, but less of this

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<v Speaker 2>thing of you know, where it's you and like a streamer.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, yeah, yeah, definitely.

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<v Speaker 2>And it's one thing if you like what they have

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<v Speaker 2>to say and you like having them as background noise,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, because I I have there's people that you know,

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<v Speaker 2>I listened to Stavros' podcast all the time. I listen

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<v Speaker 2>to a lot of different podcasts that I have on

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<v Speaker 2>and ship and you know, but like I don't you know,

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<v Speaker 2>but you got to have like a healthy, like, uh,

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<v Speaker 2>real social life. Have you made any have you made

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<v Speaker 2>any attempts to do that or like what would those

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<v Speaker 2>and what have those attempts looked like?

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<v Speaker 1>Not? Actually, not at all recently, like I would say,

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<v Speaker 1>probably within the past couple years or so. Like, I

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<v Speaker 1>haven't really tried to go out of my shell when

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<v Speaker 1>I when I'm in public, which is usually like the

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<v Speaker 1>grocery store, I avoid eye contact with everyone and I

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<v Speaker 1>just kind of go in and get out as fast

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<v Speaker 1>as I can. So I I don't really leave that

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<v Speaker 1>open for opportunity.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, are there areas in which you would feel more comfortable?

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<v Speaker 2>Like what are your what are your hobbies? What do

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<v Speaker 2>you like to do?

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<v Speaker 1>Uh?

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<v Speaker 3>Uh?

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<v Speaker 1>I like to draw, and I like to paint, and

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<v Speaker 1>I do word searches every now and then. But I

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<v Speaker 1>don't imagine that the word search community is easy to find.

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<v Speaker 2>Sure, we could find the word search community the fucking

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<v Speaker 2>probably plenty of any anything that you would do, there's

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<v Speaker 2>like a discord of people who are also doing it.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, so.

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<v Speaker 2>Hmmm, I think that you should definitely go out in

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<v Speaker 2>search of like online communities that are related to what

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<v Speaker 2>you like. To do. How's being a mom?

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<v Speaker 1>Uh, it's it's amazing because my kids really just like

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<v Speaker 1>bring joy and just love and light to my life,

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<v Speaker 1>and my whole world revolves around them, which has its

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<v Speaker 1>pros and cons. But and there, my kid's dad is

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<v Speaker 1>not in the picture, but he definitely tries to be.

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<v Speaker 1>And our relationship was not the greatest, so it's kind

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<v Speaker 1>of rough because I have to see him and uh,

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<v Speaker 1>he kind of left, like left me in a dark place,

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<v Speaker 1>and he's kind of like controlling. So it's it has

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<v Speaker 1>its pros and cons, but I would say it has

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<v Speaker 1>mostly pros.

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<v Speaker 3>M Hm.

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<v Speaker 2>Why why is your guys' relationship strained?

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<v Speaker 1>Well, he's just he's always been very controlling and manipulative,

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm uh, I don't I honestly don't even really

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<v Speaker 1>know how to put it because.

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<v Speaker 4>He just.

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<v Speaker 1>Ye for a while, he would try to make me

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<v Speaker 1>feel like I was crazy and and anything. Anytime I

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<v Speaker 1>try to come forward about anything that he does wrong,

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<v Speaker 1>he shuts me down completely. So I don't even really

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<v Speaker 1>know how to describe it.

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<v Speaker 2>Mm hmm.

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<v Speaker 1>It's yeah, it goes pretty deep, which probably didn't need

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<v Speaker 1>real therapy for.

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<v Speaker 2>But what's your what's your your kid sounds like he's

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<v Speaker 2>running around ding a bunch of stuff in the background.

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<v Speaker 3>Was he up?

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<v Speaker 4>Was he?

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<v Speaker 2>What's he doing right now?

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<v Speaker 1>My bed is just covered and I was cleaning my kitchen,

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<v Speaker 1>so I took everything off the top of the microwave

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<v Speaker 1>and put it on my bed. And now they're just

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<v Speaker 1>going through that all that. I actually have a little

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<v Speaker 1>baby and an older four year old, so they're just

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<v Speaker 1>going through everything right now. But it's okay, man.

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<v Speaker 2>So you're juggling with fucking two kids. Are you you

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<v Speaker 2>live do you Is it just you and the two

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<v Speaker 2>kids or do you live with your folks? Oh?

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<v Speaker 1>No, it's just us, just me, boys and.

0:17:09.800 --> 0:17:14.520
<v Speaker 2>My cat man. You're holding you're holding that fucking ship down, dude.

0:17:17.600 --> 0:17:20.399
<v Speaker 1>Thanks man. I try my best.

0:17:21.520 --> 0:17:24.879
<v Speaker 2>That's hard, that's that's really that's tough doing that. And

0:17:25.080 --> 0:17:25.840
<v Speaker 2>what do you work?

0:17:27.960 --> 0:17:32.240
<v Speaker 1>I do not at the moment. I am looking for

0:17:32.320 --> 0:17:35.560
<v Speaker 1>a job. I actually applied at the hospital near me

0:17:35.880 --> 0:17:39.240
<v Speaker 1>to do like like you know, the people that bring

0:17:39.280 --> 0:17:44.199
<v Speaker 1>you your food at the hospital. Yeah, I applied to

0:17:44.280 --> 0:17:49.760
<v Speaker 1>do that and then I got denied. So try a

0:17:49.800 --> 0:17:50.520
<v Speaker 1>different angle.

0:17:51.480 --> 0:17:57.000
<v Speaker 2>Mm hmm, goldie, goldie, Goldie. Damn, you're holding that fucking

0:17:57.000 --> 0:17:59.879
<v Speaker 2>ship down, Goldie. I respect you, I really do. I

0:18:00.119 --> 0:18:01.960
<v Speaker 2>respect you. This is you're holding You're holding out a

0:18:02.000 --> 0:18:05.280
<v Speaker 2>lot of ship dude. I want you know, and I'm

0:18:05.280 --> 0:18:07.399
<v Speaker 2>not I really I don't want to say this as

0:18:07.440 --> 0:18:10.720
<v Speaker 2>a way of uh, I'm not trying to be like,

0:18:11.560 --> 0:18:18.000
<v Speaker 2>uh motivational speaker type of type ship, but uh, get

0:18:18.240 --> 0:18:21.160
<v Speaker 2>just give yourself some credit, man, I mean I hope

0:18:21.240 --> 0:18:24.480
<v Speaker 2>throughout throughout whatever it is, like, give yourself some credit.

0:18:24.520 --> 0:18:27.399
<v Speaker 2>I mean, you're what you're doing is uh is a

0:18:27.560 --> 0:18:32.879
<v Speaker 2>wild undertaking. It's really that sounds so hard. Uh, you know,

0:18:33.000 --> 0:18:43.679
<v Speaker 2>dealing with like a fucking uh you know, uncooperative, uncooperative father,

0:18:44.160 --> 0:18:46.960
<v Speaker 2>you know, taking care of two kids on your own,

0:18:47.359 --> 0:18:50.320
<v Speaker 2>working you know, dealing with I mean that's tough man.

0:18:50.400 --> 0:18:55.200
<v Speaker 2>So you know, uh, have have some have some compassion

0:18:56.000 --> 0:18:59.159
<v Speaker 2>for yourself as you never like do like it like

0:18:59.280 --> 0:19:02.960
<v Speaker 2>do both things at once, Like have some compassion for yourself,

0:19:04.280 --> 0:19:06.680
<v Speaker 2>you know, because what you're doing is hard, but also

0:19:06.760 --> 0:19:09.840
<v Speaker 2>like like look at yourself in the mirror and be like,

0:19:09.920 --> 0:19:12.320
<v Speaker 2>I'm fucking killing it right now. I'm doing I'm doing

0:19:12.440 --> 0:19:17.960
<v Speaker 2>pretty good job at this like hard thing. Like because

0:19:17.960 --> 0:19:20.760
<v Speaker 2>you because you I don't know it's from from what

0:19:20.800 --> 0:19:23.520
<v Speaker 2>you said about like, oh, I feel awkward if like

0:19:23.520 --> 0:19:26.600
<v Speaker 2>I can't look people in the eye. Like, uh, you

0:19:26.640 --> 0:19:28.080
<v Speaker 2>didn't say it out right, but I don't know if

0:19:28.080 --> 0:19:31.040
<v Speaker 2>you're dealing with any kind of like self confidence issues,

0:19:31.119 --> 0:19:33.280
<v Speaker 2>but like take a second to look at yourself and

0:19:33.320 --> 0:19:35.639
<v Speaker 2>be like, wait, I'm actually kind of sick right now,

0:19:36.480 --> 0:19:38.840
<v Speaker 2>you know, like I'm dealing with all this shit, but

0:19:38.880 --> 0:19:42.320
<v Speaker 2>I'm still I'm holding it down, you know, like walk

0:19:42.359 --> 0:19:43.960
<v Speaker 2>around with it like that's what you should be walking

0:19:44.000 --> 0:19:47.320
<v Speaker 2>around with and not like, oh I'm weird and I

0:19:47.320 --> 0:19:52.360
<v Speaker 2>don't I can't fit into the planet.

0:19:53.560 --> 0:19:55.879
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Yeah, you got it down for sure.

0:19:56.119 --> 0:19:58.240
<v Speaker 2>You got it down. You got it down.

0:20:02.000 --> 0:20:04.879
<v Speaker 1>Man, dude, you have no idea how happy you just

0:20:05.000 --> 0:20:08.800
<v Speaker 1>nade me because, like, like I said, like when I

0:20:08.800 --> 0:20:13.240
<v Speaker 1>first started watching you, like it was like every single

0:20:13.440 --> 0:20:16.679
<v Speaker 1>stream back when you used to have like call screeners

0:20:16.720 --> 0:20:20.159
<v Speaker 1>and stuff. I tried to call in, but then I

0:20:20.200 --> 0:20:23.480
<v Speaker 1>got too scared and I hung up. But back then

0:20:23.560 --> 0:20:26.200
<v Speaker 1>I used to watch literally every single one of your streams.

0:20:26.240 --> 0:20:28.760
<v Speaker 1>I'd be chatting in it. So it's like so like

0:20:29.480 --> 0:20:31.639
<v Speaker 1>surreal to be on the phone with your right though.

0:20:33.440 --> 0:20:36.919
<v Speaker 2>I'm Goldie. Try to try to try to build yourself up.

0:20:36.960 --> 0:20:38.679
<v Speaker 2>You're doing a fucking tough thing and you're doing a

0:20:38.680 --> 0:20:41.760
<v Speaker 2>pretty good job at it because uh, your kids sound

0:20:41.800 --> 0:20:45.760
<v Speaker 2>like they're alive, which is uh, I mean, even doing

0:20:45.800 --> 0:20:51.040
<v Speaker 2>that it is hard. So uh, you know, give yourself,

0:20:51.080 --> 0:20:53.480
<v Speaker 2>give yourself some credit when you try to make friends

0:20:53.480 --> 0:20:55.080
<v Speaker 2>and you just go just don't know. When you're going

0:20:55.080 --> 0:20:57.119
<v Speaker 2>about the world in general, you want to have that

0:20:57.200 --> 0:21:01.080
<v Speaker 2>mindset about yourself about like, wait, I'm actually kind of awesome.

0:21:01.560 --> 0:21:09.159
<v Speaker 2>So do with that information as you please. All right, man, Goldie,

0:21:09.160 --> 0:21:10.320
<v Speaker 2>is there anything else you want to say to the

0:21:10.359 --> 0:21:11.920
<v Speaker 2>people of the computer before we go?

0:21:12.440 --> 0:21:16.240
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, just love love, come on, chat, love on yourself,

0:21:17.200 --> 0:21:23.520
<v Speaker 1>keep this uh stream of love going, swag, do something

0:21:23.600 --> 0:21:24.560
<v Speaker 1>nice for yourself.

0:21:24.800 --> 0:21:27.760
<v Speaker 2>Thank you so much, Lyle, Thank you Goldi. You have

0:21:27.760 --> 0:21:28.119
<v Speaker 2>a good one.

0:21:28.160 --> 0:21:31.680
<v Speaker 3>Good luck all right, you too, my Golden.

0:21:33.440 --> 0:21:37.560
<v Speaker 2>I want to join the word search Discord. No, I

0:21:37.560 --> 0:21:39.040
<v Speaker 2>actually don't want to do that. I'm not gonna lie

0:21:39.040 --> 0:21:42.440
<v Speaker 2>and say I want to do that, but it's because

0:21:42.480 --> 0:21:45.240
<v Speaker 2>I don't like word searches. If I liked word searches,

0:21:46.000 --> 0:21:49.160
<v Speaker 2>i'd be in the I'd be the fucking head mod

0:21:49.720 --> 0:21:53.359
<v Speaker 2>of the word search Discord and then I would have

0:21:53.440 --> 0:21:58.960
<v Speaker 2>sex all the time. Hello, Hey, buddy, what's uh what's

0:21:58.960 --> 0:21:59.400
<v Speaker 2>your name?

0:21:59.600 --> 0:22:03.440
<v Speaker 4>My name title idle like like American? Yeah, like American idol?

0:22:03.960 --> 0:22:06.360
<v Speaker 2>Cool. I like that name. I assume we haven't spoken before,

0:22:06.359 --> 0:22:08.080
<v Speaker 2>because I would remember an idol.

0:22:09.119 --> 0:22:10.920
<v Speaker 4>No, yeah, we haven't. I've been watching for a while

0:22:10.920 --> 0:22:12.439
<v Speaker 4>and I've been trying to call in. I have a

0:22:12.560 --> 0:22:14.399
<v Speaker 4>very specific reason why I'm calling in.

0:22:14.920 --> 0:22:18.680
<v Speaker 2>Okay, Well, you texted me and you said I want

0:22:18.680 --> 0:22:20.080
<v Speaker 2>to talk about my anger.

0:22:21.160 --> 0:22:23.399
<v Speaker 4>Yeah. I have a lot of pent up anger towards

0:22:23.440 --> 0:22:27.160
<v Speaker 4>a you know, specific group online that just like gets

0:22:27.200 --> 0:22:32.240
<v Speaker 4>me gone. I'm kind of sicking. I'm sick and tired

0:22:32.240 --> 0:22:36.320
<v Speaker 4>of like these food reviewers blowing up, you know, low

0:22:36.400 --> 0:22:39.600
<v Speaker 4>key spots, Like just the other day, like there's this

0:22:39.640 --> 0:22:43.400
<v Speaker 4>pop up spot, taco spot, very low key nobody knows about.

0:22:43.400 --> 0:22:46.000
<v Speaker 4>I'm going through Instagram and I see a fucking food

0:22:46.040 --> 0:22:48.520
<v Speaker 4>reviewer with like one hundred and ten thousand mics at

0:22:48.520 --> 0:22:50.840
<v Speaker 4>this spot, and I'm like, Fuck, it's gonna be like

0:22:50.880 --> 0:22:53.280
<v Speaker 4>ten thousand people at this place now, I gotta wait

0:22:53.320 --> 0:22:55.920
<v Speaker 4>in line. Quality is gonna drop because they're trying to

0:22:55.960 --> 0:22:57.520
<v Speaker 4>serve Everybody's just like what the.

0:22:57.520 --> 0:23:02.200
<v Speaker 2>Fuck why does that upset you that that's that's good,

0:23:02.520 --> 0:23:04.960
<v Speaker 2>that's what you want that it's I I hate the

0:23:05.040 --> 0:23:10.120
<v Speaker 2>whole like, uh, gatekeeping thing. Don't you want that business

0:23:10.160 --> 0:23:11.000
<v Speaker 2>to be doing well?

0:23:12.400 --> 0:23:16.200
<v Speaker 4>I do, but then it inconvenience is me because now

0:23:16.200 --> 0:23:19.080
<v Speaker 4>it's just a line and now you know it's people

0:23:19.119 --> 0:23:22.440
<v Speaker 4>there and it's just too much, too much going on. Yeah,

0:23:22.480 --> 0:23:25.080
<v Speaker 4>I want the business to succeed, but not at the

0:23:25.119 --> 0:23:25.840
<v Speaker 4>cost of me.

0:23:27.280 --> 0:23:28.680
<v Speaker 2>But you don't run the business.

0:23:29.680 --> 0:23:30.280
<v Speaker 3>No, I don't.

0:23:30.680 --> 0:23:35.000
<v Speaker 4>It's just how can I say it. I'm just tired

0:23:35.480 --> 0:23:37.600
<v Speaker 4>of places that I love to go where it's low key.

0:23:37.720 --> 0:23:39.679
<v Speaker 4>Nobody knows. It's just I just like to enjoy it,

0:23:40.040 --> 0:23:43.240
<v Speaker 4>enjoy the scenery, you know, but you know people, You

0:23:43.320 --> 0:23:45.680
<v Speaker 4>got ignorant people and all these types of people coming

0:23:45.680 --> 0:23:49.080
<v Speaker 4>in because you know, all this ship and it's just

0:23:49.119 --> 0:23:50.520
<v Speaker 4>too much, you do.

0:23:51.160 --> 0:23:53.760
<v Speaker 2>You do sound very angry. This is not about I

0:23:53.800 --> 0:23:58.040
<v Speaker 2>can tell this is not about tacos. There's something else

0:23:58.040 --> 0:24:00.760
<v Speaker 2>going it's definitely notice about going on in your life.

0:24:01.920 --> 0:24:04.480
<v Speaker 4>No, nothing that's going on. It's just I'm sick of

0:24:04.480 --> 0:24:07.080
<v Speaker 4>the tired of low key spots that I enjoy being

0:24:07.119 --> 0:24:10.640
<v Speaker 4>blown up by food reviewers.

0:24:12.040 --> 0:24:14.040
<v Speaker 2>But do use what I don't know. I can. I

0:24:14.080 --> 0:24:16.399
<v Speaker 2>have go on to rants to you, and I don't

0:24:16.760 --> 0:24:19.639
<v Speaker 2>get food. I don't get it. Do you know what

0:24:19.720 --> 0:24:21.800
<v Speaker 2>I mean? You don't know what I mean. I don't

0:24:21.800 --> 0:24:25.560
<v Speaker 2>I don't get like, Okay, I'm gonna say a bunch

0:24:25.600 --> 0:24:27.760
<v Speaker 2>of things that sound insane. But you know when people

0:24:27.800 --> 0:24:30.280
<v Speaker 2>are like, oh, the food at this restaurant is so good,

0:24:30.359 --> 0:24:33.760
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, what who cares? There's food everywhere, Like, you

0:24:33.760 --> 0:24:37.120
<v Speaker 2>can get a taco at a billion different places.

0:24:37.600 --> 0:24:41.920
<v Speaker 4>It's fine, but it's just you know, the quality of

0:24:42.000 --> 0:24:44.800
<v Speaker 4>the taco. It's not just the quality of it's just

0:24:44.800 --> 0:24:48.840
<v Speaker 4>the food in general. It's just places that were special

0:24:48.920 --> 0:24:51.880
<v Speaker 4>to me are being taken over. I guess you can say.

0:24:51.640 --> 0:24:56.879
<v Speaker 2>That, Yeah you don't. You don't own I don't own it.

0:24:57.520 --> 0:24:59.000
<v Speaker 4>No, I don't. I don't own the police. It's just

0:24:59.080 --> 0:25:02.520
<v Speaker 4>safe spots where I can where people who like to

0:25:02.680 --> 0:25:04.600
<v Speaker 4>just go and just like all right, yeah, nobody knows

0:25:04.640 --> 0:25:09.000
<v Speaker 4>about this spot, let's go here being blown up. That's

0:25:09.040 --> 0:25:09.760
<v Speaker 4>my problem.

0:25:09.920 --> 0:25:14.000
<v Speaker 2>Where do you live? I live in Pennsylvania, what like

0:25:14.160 --> 0:25:19.320
<v Speaker 2>in a big city. Yeah, he in Philly. Yeah, there's

0:25:19.320 --> 0:25:21.560
<v Speaker 2>a billion restaurants in Philly. Just go to another place.

0:25:22.760 --> 0:25:24.000
<v Speaker 1>That. No, that's the thing.

0:25:24.080 --> 0:25:25.800
<v Speaker 4>I don't want to go to another place.

0:25:26.680 --> 0:25:28.840
<v Speaker 2>But you might discover a new place. But you might

0:25:28.880 --> 0:25:31.040
<v Speaker 2>discover another new place that you like.

0:25:32.280 --> 0:25:37.879
<v Speaker 4>That is true. But it's just okay, you're right on that.

0:25:37.920 --> 0:25:40.480
<v Speaker 4>I can discover a new place. It's just do I

0:25:40.520 --> 0:25:43.200
<v Speaker 4>want to open myself up to that new experience?

0:25:45.119 --> 0:25:46.880
<v Speaker 2>What did? I don't understand what you're saying. Why would

0:25:46.920 --> 0:25:47.119
<v Speaker 2>you not?

0:25:49.119 --> 0:25:50.720
<v Speaker 4>I don't know. It's this new things scare me.

0:25:53.320 --> 0:25:56.639
<v Speaker 2>Well, let's talk about that. That's more interesting to me.

0:25:56.680 --> 0:25:58.800
<v Speaker 2>Why do new things scare you? Why does it scare

0:25:58.840 --> 0:26:02.040
<v Speaker 2>you to go to a new taco place.

0:26:03.440 --> 0:26:06.480
<v Speaker 4>It's not necessarily taco place. It's just like, I hate

0:26:06.640 --> 0:26:10.280
<v Speaker 4>wasting money on bad food, and that's what scares me.

0:26:10.359 --> 0:26:13.840
<v Speaker 4>Then I'm just gonna waste money and just not enjoy it. Okay,

0:26:14.440 --> 0:26:17.679
<v Speaker 4>you know what is life?

0:26:17.800 --> 0:26:18.080
<v Speaker 2>Okay?

0:26:18.480 --> 0:26:20.680
<v Speaker 4>And everybody likes to Everybody likes to sit there and

0:26:20.800 --> 0:26:24.159
<v Speaker 4>enjoy a nice meal. And the meal would be ruined

0:26:24.200 --> 0:26:26.680
<v Speaker 4>if you pay a certain price for for disgusting food.

0:26:28.560 --> 0:26:35.960
<v Speaker 2>Mm hmm. Yeah, but that's what you gotta do. That's

0:26:36.000 --> 0:26:39.240
<v Speaker 2>the cost of Like I actually, I can I tell

0:26:39.240 --> 0:26:44.600
<v Speaker 2>you something. I hate reviews. Here's here's what my hot takes. No, No,

0:26:44.720 --> 0:26:47.320
<v Speaker 2>I hate okay, I hate review Like when we're about

0:26:47.359 --> 0:26:50.960
<v Speaker 2>to okay, here's here's one of my hot takes. Like

0:26:51.000 --> 0:26:54.040
<v Speaker 2>if I'm with someone and I'm like, oh, let's try

0:26:54.080 --> 0:26:56.320
<v Speaker 2>this restaurant, and they pull out their phone and they

0:26:56.320 --> 0:27:00.439
<v Speaker 2>start reading the reviews. I hate that because, to me,

0:27:01.119 --> 0:27:04.520
<v Speaker 2>if it's bad, let's just find out. Who cares? I

0:27:04.560 --> 0:27:07.880
<v Speaker 2>don't want to Why does every experience have to be

0:27:08.400 --> 0:27:11.960
<v Speaker 2>Why do I need the perfect, most amazing thing all

0:27:12.000 --> 0:27:14.679
<v Speaker 2>the time, Like if we go to a place and

0:27:14.720 --> 0:27:18.000
<v Speaker 2>it's shitty, we'll just find it out by going there.

0:27:18.040 --> 0:27:21.560
<v Speaker 2>I hate that I have to like curate my life.

0:27:21.600 --> 0:27:24.800
<v Speaker 2>I hate like trying to curate your life so that

0:27:24.880 --> 0:27:31.080
<v Speaker 2>you never have any negative experiences ever, or any like

0:27:31.119 --> 0:27:34.199
<v Speaker 2>negative food experiences even it's just stupid. It's like, just

0:27:34.280 --> 0:27:37.280
<v Speaker 2>go into the restaurant and you pay the money, and

0:27:37.320 --> 0:27:39.679
<v Speaker 2>you eat the shitty food, and then you know not

0:27:39.760 --> 0:27:42.159
<v Speaker 2>to go there anymore. The reviews. I don't like the

0:27:42.240 --> 0:27:46.560
<v Speaker 2>system of like we have to protect ourselves from you know,

0:27:47.400 --> 0:27:50.600
<v Speaker 2>it's a real think. I think it's listen and I'm

0:27:50.640 --> 0:27:52.160
<v Speaker 2>about to go on a huge this is the most

0:27:52.200 --> 0:27:55.239
<v Speaker 2>podcast bro thing I'm gonna say it's part of the

0:27:55.280 --> 0:27:59.680
<v Speaker 2>overall pacification of America food reviews. You know what I mean.

0:28:00.760 --> 0:28:04.600
<v Speaker 2>It's it's it's a further passification of America that we

0:28:04.640 --> 0:28:09.720
<v Speaker 2>feel the need to protect ourselves from eating a shitty burrito.

0:28:10.119 --> 0:28:12.680
<v Speaker 2>You can handle the experience of eating a shitty burrito,

0:28:13.240 --> 0:28:15.359
<v Speaker 2>and then that's what happens to you. You ate a

0:28:15.359 --> 0:28:19.520
<v Speaker 2>shitty burrito, you know, you get upsets, and then you

0:28:19.520 --> 0:28:23.520
<v Speaker 2>don't go to that place anymore. I'm being facetious, but

0:28:23.680 --> 0:28:25.920
<v Speaker 2>I also do one hundred percent believe everything I'm saying.

0:28:27.160 --> 0:28:31.760
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, it's just, you know, I'm just tired of it,

0:28:32.880 --> 0:28:36.679
<v Speaker 4>but I do. Jeraly do thoroughly enjoy talking to you.

0:28:37.040 --> 0:28:39.120
<v Speaker 4>It was good to get it off my chest. I

0:28:39.160 --> 0:28:41.240
<v Speaker 4>appreciate it and appreciate you answering my call.

0:28:41.640 --> 0:28:43.760
<v Speaker 2>Thanks mate, Is there anything else you want to say

0:28:43.800 --> 0:28:47.840
<v Speaker 2>to the people of the computer before we go? Idle subscribe? Sweet?

0:28:48.240 --> 0:28:53.240
<v Speaker 2>Thank you, adel. I was explaining this to someone the

0:28:53.280 --> 0:28:55.520
<v Speaker 2>other day. This is why I don't I like when

0:28:55.560 --> 0:29:00.240
<v Speaker 2>people are like, oh, the food in Texas is so like,

0:29:00.240 --> 0:29:03.160
<v Speaker 2>the Mexican food in Texas is so great. I'm like,

0:29:03.200 --> 0:29:09.720
<v Speaker 2>I'm sure it is, But if you live in like

0:29:09.960 --> 0:29:17.800
<v Speaker 2>Rhode Island, there's some fucking Mexican restaurant within fifty miles

0:29:17.800 --> 0:29:22.040
<v Speaker 2>a year that's probably pretty good. Is it is the

0:29:22.320 --> 0:29:26.360
<v Speaker 2>one in Texas? Is it that much better? I don't know.

0:29:26.440 --> 0:29:28.040
<v Speaker 2>Food is food. That's just how I am. I'm not

0:29:28.120 --> 0:29:30.520
<v Speaker 2>like a Also, you know, I'm like, I think this

0:29:30.720 --> 0:29:33.600
<v Speaker 2>maybe maybe this is because I'm like, I'm a single guy,

0:29:33.720 --> 0:29:37.560
<v Speaker 2>you know, so I'm not gonna like like whatever. It's

0:29:37.600 --> 0:29:39.840
<v Speaker 2>when people like people like, oh, you live in New York,

0:29:39.880 --> 0:29:42.240
<v Speaker 2>you go do you go to all the restaurants? I'm like, no,

0:29:43.440 --> 0:29:45.640
<v Speaker 2>I'm a single guy. I'm not gonna like go out

0:29:45.840 --> 0:29:51.720
<v Speaker 2>alone to a nice restaurant on a Tuesday night. I don't.

0:29:51.760 --> 0:29:54.120
<v Speaker 2>I'm not it. I just don't care. I eat at

0:29:54.160 --> 0:29:58.800
<v Speaker 2>like I eat at the grocery store, the bodegas, the

0:29:58.840 --> 0:30:03.600
<v Speaker 2>little fast casual whatever things. I also I hate. I also, like,

0:30:03.720 --> 0:30:10.600
<v Speaker 2>just on principle, I hate spending money on uh fancy

0:30:10.720 --> 0:30:17.280
<v Speaker 2>food with like low purport like low portions. You know,

0:30:17.480 --> 0:30:21.560
<v Speaker 2>I like going to a shitty Mexican place where they'll

0:30:21.560 --> 0:30:24.720
<v Speaker 2>give me a big fucking burrito for not that much money.

0:30:24.720 --> 0:30:28.960
<v Speaker 2>But if it's think it's like a fancy takaria whatever place,

0:30:29.000 --> 0:30:30.960
<v Speaker 2>and they give you a tiny thing of chips and

0:30:31.000 --> 0:30:33.680
<v Speaker 2>a tiny little whatever and you pay like it's like

0:30:33.800 --> 0:30:37.480
<v Speaker 2>thirty dollars. I hate that shit, and I hate I

0:30:37.520 --> 0:30:40.720
<v Speaker 2>hate yeah, and I hate reviews. It's like, just eatat

0:30:40.720 --> 0:30:42.720
<v Speaker 2>it's okay, you know, go you have a be in

0:30:42.760 --> 0:30:46.040
<v Speaker 2>a bad go to eat a bad food. You know

0:30:46.080 --> 0:30:51.440
<v Speaker 2>it'll be okay. I like good. I like UH. I

0:30:51.560 --> 0:30:56.280
<v Speaker 2>like good reviews of things. Sometimes do I read a review?

0:30:56.320 --> 0:30:59.160
<v Speaker 2>I guess I read reviews of uh. I read reviews

0:30:59.160 --> 0:31:03.200
<v Speaker 2>of video games? Yeah, okay, all right, maybe it's maybe

0:31:03.280 --> 0:31:05.120
<v Speaker 2>I'm you know what, I'm actually kind of a bullshitter

0:31:05.160 --> 0:31:10.120
<v Speaker 2>because I read reviews of video games before I play them,

0:31:10.320 --> 0:31:16.480
<v Speaker 2>or do do I? I do sometimes? Yeah, you know,

0:31:16.600 --> 0:31:19.760
<v Speaker 2>because I don't like to waste my time on it. Okay,

0:31:19.800 --> 0:31:23.000
<v Speaker 2>you know what, I take back everything I said. I

0:31:23.000 --> 0:31:25.920
<v Speaker 2>think I just I think I just applied it to

0:31:26.080 --> 0:31:28.600
<v Speaker 2>this situation because I don't care that much about food.

0:31:28.640 --> 0:31:32.120
<v Speaker 2>But when I apply it to something I care about, Yeah, yeah,

0:31:32.160 --> 0:31:35.480
<v Speaker 2>I think reviews are good. Hey, everybody, what's up. It's

0:31:35.520 --> 0:31:39.920
<v Speaker 2>me Lyle And I'm gonna do the second half of

0:31:40.000 --> 0:31:44.480
<v Speaker 2>this episode as a gek mal portion. If that's okay

0:31:44.520 --> 0:31:48.120
<v Speaker 2>with you. If that's not okay with you, then uh,

0:31:49.040 --> 0:31:50.720
<v Speaker 2>I don't know what to tell you. It's too late,

0:31:51.240 --> 0:31:55.880
<v Speaker 2>because I'm gonna I'm gonna do it. I am currently

0:31:56.920 --> 0:32:00.600
<v Speaker 2>alone in a room talking into a microphone. I feel good.

0:32:00.640 --> 0:32:06.480
<v Speaker 2>I took a Celsius, I took a bathroom break, and

0:32:06.520 --> 0:32:09.000
<v Speaker 2>I feel good. I feel ready to talk into a

0:32:09.040 --> 0:32:14.360
<v Speaker 2>microphone alone and read some emails and I feel like

0:32:14.400 --> 0:32:18.480
<v Speaker 2>I'm talking directly to you guys. What's going on in

0:32:18.960 --> 0:32:23.719
<v Speaker 2>my life? I went to Canada. That was nice. New

0:32:23.800 --> 0:32:27.840
<v Speaker 2>York in the fall is great. I'm trying to romanticize

0:32:27.880 --> 0:32:30.240
<v Speaker 2>my own life. Here's what's going on. This is my

0:32:30.440 --> 0:32:32.320
<v Speaker 2>this is the portion of the podcast. I'll do my

0:32:33.880 --> 0:32:40.240
<v Speaker 2>therapy for a second. I find myself constantly thinking about

0:32:40.400 --> 0:32:45.800
<v Speaker 2>the future, the future, you know, I'm always making plans.

0:32:46.800 --> 0:32:48.840
<v Speaker 2>I'm always like, oh, wouldn't it be cool to live here?

0:32:48.880 --> 0:32:53.200
<v Speaker 2>One day? Like I go to fucking uh Zillow or whatever,

0:32:53.280 --> 0:32:59.560
<v Speaker 2>and I'm like, what's the what's the rent in uh Madison, Wisconsin?

0:33:00.360 --> 0:33:02.760
<v Speaker 2>What would it be like to be there? You know,

0:33:02.840 --> 0:33:05.600
<v Speaker 2>I'm on the Reddit. I'm looking at other people's lives

0:33:05.640 --> 0:33:07.480
<v Speaker 2>on Instagram. And shit, and I'm like, what would it

0:33:07.520 --> 0:33:09.920
<v Speaker 2>be like to live that life? What would be like

0:33:09.960 --> 0:33:11.320
<v Speaker 2>to do this? What would be like to do that?

0:33:11.520 --> 0:33:15.120
<v Speaker 2>And I'm realizing I'm like, I'm fucking thinking about versions

0:33:15.160 --> 0:33:18.680
<v Speaker 2>of myself and versions of different versions of life that

0:33:18.720 --> 0:33:23.560
<v Speaker 2>are that I'm not even in, and I'm missing my

0:33:23.600 --> 0:33:27.520
<v Speaker 2>own life. It's crazy. So I'm trying to romanticize my

0:33:27.560 --> 0:33:31.440
<v Speaker 2>own life. So I'm feeling very romantic about this very

0:33:31.480 --> 0:33:37.120
<v Speaker 2>moment in which I'm sitting here talking into this uh microphone,

0:33:37.440 --> 0:33:40.560
<v Speaker 2>talking to you guys. So I'm going to romanticize the

0:33:40.680 --> 0:33:45.880
<v Speaker 2>life I'm currently living right now, however good or bad

0:33:45.920 --> 0:33:50.200
<v Speaker 2>it is. When I'm with someone, I'm trying to really

0:33:50.200 --> 0:33:53.040
<v Speaker 2>be with them. I'm looking in their eyes. I'm like,

0:33:53.080 --> 0:33:56.680
<v Speaker 2>even if I hate them, I'm like, oh, this is nice.

0:33:56.680 --> 0:34:02.440
<v Speaker 2>I get to I'm like warmed by the distain I

0:34:02.520 --> 0:34:06.840
<v Speaker 2>have for this person. Get I feel alive. I'm like

0:34:06.920 --> 0:34:09.640
<v Speaker 2>really diving in all of my emotions. I'm like diving

0:34:09.680 --> 0:34:11.760
<v Speaker 2>into them. I'm like, oh, I get to feel angry,

0:34:11.800 --> 0:34:14.720
<v Speaker 2>I get to feel I'm getting into a I'm gonna

0:34:14.719 --> 0:34:17.799
<v Speaker 2>fight with my landlord, and I'm like, this is exciting.

0:34:18.640 --> 0:34:21.400
<v Speaker 2>I get to send an angry email about fixing my

0:34:22.640 --> 0:34:28.240
<v Speaker 2>fucking heater. Look at me, I'm engaging with the universe.

0:34:29.120 --> 0:34:32.320
<v Speaker 2>I don't know. I'm crazy. All right, let's read some emails.

0:34:34.120 --> 0:34:39.880
<v Speaker 2>Let's see here. This is from Waka Hello GEK. My

0:34:39.960 --> 0:34:42.640
<v Speaker 2>life is not bad. I'm about to graduate college, I

0:34:42.640 --> 0:34:44.880
<v Speaker 2>have a good lady, I'm planning to marry, and a

0:34:45.000 --> 0:34:48.960
<v Speaker 2>job that is giving me good experience with decent pay. Recently,

0:34:49.040 --> 0:34:52.400
<v Speaker 2>I had a strange dream. In the dream, my parents

0:34:52.400 --> 0:34:54.960
<v Speaker 2>were flying out to where I live to visit me,

0:34:55.360 --> 0:34:58.880
<v Speaker 2>and their plane suddenly vanishes. But I can remember involves

0:34:58.920 --> 0:35:01.480
<v Speaker 2>me trying to process this moment. I don't know what

0:35:01.560 --> 0:35:03.520
<v Speaker 2>happened to the plane, but when I learned that my

0:35:03.600 --> 0:35:07.319
<v Speaker 2>parents were missing, I was devastated. After some time, I

0:35:07.360 --> 0:35:10.160
<v Speaker 2>began to question why I was even sad to begin with,

0:35:10.520 --> 0:35:12.880
<v Speaker 2>and I started to reflect on all the problems in

0:35:12.880 --> 0:35:16.319
<v Speaker 2>that relationship with my parents. I remember feeling angry for

0:35:16.360 --> 0:35:20.000
<v Speaker 2>even considering that. Eventually, some kind of authority came to

0:35:20.040 --> 0:35:22.440
<v Speaker 2>me and was about to reveal what happened to my

0:35:22.480 --> 0:35:26.399
<v Speaker 2>parent's plane. But then I woke up. My parents are

0:35:26.960 --> 0:35:29.040
<v Speaker 2>flying out to the state I live to visit me

0:35:29.040 --> 0:35:31.560
<v Speaker 2>and my sister for Thanksgiving, So the timing of this

0:35:31.719 --> 0:35:36.480
<v Speaker 2>dream is alarming. I recently asked chat gpt to interpret

0:35:36.520 --> 0:35:38.480
<v Speaker 2>the stream for me because it's been stuck on my

0:35:38.640 --> 0:35:42.040
<v Speaker 2>mind for a week now. Chat gave me mumbo jumbo

0:35:42.120 --> 0:35:45.000
<v Speaker 2>about how it is a reflection of my strained relationship

0:35:45.000 --> 0:35:48.880
<v Speaker 2>with my parents. Blah blah blah. What are your thoughts?

0:35:49.280 --> 0:35:51.279
<v Speaker 2>Does this sound like a sign that my parents are

0:35:51.320 --> 0:35:53.480
<v Speaker 2>going to die? Uh? No, I don't think it's a

0:35:53.520 --> 0:35:57.520
<v Speaker 2>sign that your parents are going to die. I don't think. Okay, Like,

0:35:57.719 --> 0:36:01.240
<v Speaker 2>there's actually a lot of woo shit that I believe

0:36:01.320 --> 0:36:04.000
<v Speaker 2>is completely logical that makes a lot of fucking sense

0:36:04.040 --> 0:36:06.200
<v Speaker 2>to me. I and what but and then there's a

0:36:06.239 --> 0:36:07.840
<v Speaker 2>lot of woo woo shit that I think is stupid

0:36:08.239 --> 0:36:16.759
<v Speaker 2>And with dreams, Like I don't interpret dreams to mean

0:36:17.040 --> 0:36:21.480
<v Speaker 2>anything about the about anything external, like they don't. I

0:36:21.480 --> 0:36:24.319
<v Speaker 2>don't think they mean shit about the external events of

0:36:24.320 --> 0:36:27.480
<v Speaker 2>the universe. So like, no, I don't think that, uh,

0:36:27.800 --> 0:36:31.480
<v Speaker 2>this dream means that your parents are gonna die or

0:36:31.520 --> 0:36:33.480
<v Speaker 2>that something bad will happen. I don't believe in wu

0:36:33.520 --> 0:36:36.920
<v Speaker 2>wuo shit like that. But I totally believe in dreams

0:36:36.960 --> 0:36:40.760
<v Speaker 2>being like reflective of the internal state. So it definitely

0:36:40.760 --> 0:36:44.480
<v Speaker 2>means you have some anxiety. It's definitely also dreams will

0:36:44.480 --> 0:36:46.160
<v Speaker 2>like show you shit that you don't want to admit

0:36:46.160 --> 0:36:51.279
<v Speaker 2>to yourself. Like what a perfect example is, like if

0:36:51.280 --> 0:36:54.320
<v Speaker 2>you break up with someone and you believe you're fully

0:36:54.360 --> 0:36:57.680
<v Speaker 2>over it, your dreams will show you that you're not.

0:36:58.080 --> 0:37:00.520
<v Speaker 2>You'll be like, you'll be fucking like fun five months

0:37:00.520 --> 0:37:02.480
<v Speaker 2>after a breakup or something like that, and believe you're

0:37:02.480 --> 0:37:03.920
<v Speaker 2>totally over it, and then you just have a dream

0:37:04.000 --> 0:37:06.520
<v Speaker 2>that you're like holding hands with that person, and your

0:37:06.520 --> 0:37:08.919
<v Speaker 2>subconscious is like you're lying to yourself that you're over

0:37:08.960 --> 0:37:13.120
<v Speaker 2>this right now, you know. So dreams will like show

0:37:13.160 --> 0:37:17.279
<v Speaker 2>you uncomfortable shit, But that doesn't mean any That doesn't

0:37:17.320 --> 0:37:20.920
<v Speaker 2>mean shit about the you know your ex girlfriend, you

0:37:20.960 --> 0:37:22.440
<v Speaker 2>know she's out living her life, has nothing to do

0:37:22.440 --> 0:37:25.440
<v Speaker 2>with your fucking dream. It's just reflects how you feel.

0:37:25.880 --> 0:37:30.279
<v Speaker 2>So maybe you feel anxious that about your parents. Maybe

0:37:30.320 --> 0:37:33.319
<v Speaker 2>you feel anxious about your parents dying, which is a

0:37:33.400 --> 0:37:37.400
<v Speaker 2>legitimate feeling to have. Maybe, yeah, it's probably reflective of

0:37:37.440 --> 0:37:41.759
<v Speaker 2>some relationship problems that you have with your parents. It's

0:37:41.760 --> 0:37:48.840
<v Speaker 2>probably reflective of some anger of some kind. So I

0:37:49.239 --> 0:37:55.200
<v Speaker 2>agree with the chat gpt interpretation of that. But I

0:37:55.200 --> 0:38:00.880
<v Speaker 2>don't believe in like signs of external thing. I believe

0:38:00.920 --> 0:38:08.120
<v Speaker 2>in signs of internal things. Uh yeah, I mean thinking that.

0:38:08.480 --> 0:38:11.280
<v Speaker 2>To think that your dreams are like signs of the universe,

0:38:11.760 --> 0:38:18.000
<v Speaker 2>of like events that will happen, that means that means

0:38:18.040 --> 0:38:21.279
<v Speaker 2>that you're like God or some shit. You know what

0:38:21.320 --> 0:38:23.960
<v Speaker 2>I'm saying. Okay, there's more of this email. That is

0:38:24.000 --> 0:38:26.759
<v Speaker 2>the first of two strange experiences I have had at

0:38:26.840 --> 0:38:30.040
<v Speaker 2>night recently. The other was last night I could not

0:38:30.120 --> 0:38:34.239
<v Speaker 2>fall asleep after watching six episodes of Bob's Burgers. I

0:38:34.280 --> 0:38:38.120
<v Speaker 2>turned to YouTube, and I decided to watch a documentary

0:38:38.160 --> 0:38:42.880
<v Speaker 2>about the ongoing civil war in Sudan. The documentary explored

0:38:42.920 --> 0:38:48.200
<v Speaker 2>the complex landscape of the parties involved in the war. Eventually,

0:38:48.200 --> 0:38:51.080
<v Speaker 2>the video talks about a specific skirmish over a town

0:38:51.400 --> 0:38:54.200
<v Speaker 2>in which one of the military forces kills hundreds of

0:38:54.239 --> 0:38:57.600
<v Speaker 2>civilians and burns everything down. At this point, I had

0:38:57.640 --> 0:39:00.920
<v Speaker 2>to stop watching the video. I feel like I somewhat

0:39:00.960 --> 0:39:03.640
<v Speaker 2>keep up with global events. I am aware of horrible

0:39:03.680 --> 0:39:07.759
<v Speaker 2>things that happen everywhere every day. Human history has an

0:39:07.880 --> 0:39:11.720
<v Speaker 2>unmeasurable list of tragedies that have occurred, but for some reason,

0:39:11.760 --> 0:39:14.520
<v Speaker 2>I could not go back to watching Bob's Burgers this time.

0:39:15.280 --> 0:39:17.600
<v Speaker 2>I feel like I try to typically keep a good

0:39:17.600 --> 0:39:20.040
<v Speaker 2>outlook on life, but this makes me feel like I

0:39:20.080 --> 0:39:24.000
<v Speaker 2>am so ungrateful for my problems. I get to be

0:39:24.120 --> 0:39:26.840
<v Speaker 2>upset at my parents from my childhood and not have

0:39:26.920 --> 0:39:30.680
<v Speaker 2>to grieve my entire town being slaughtered and burned to

0:39:30.719 --> 0:39:35.440
<v Speaker 2>the ground by an evil dictator. Ghek, am I going crazy?

0:39:35.840 --> 0:39:39.120
<v Speaker 2>Why am I suddenly burdened with these thoughts? I'm grateful

0:39:39.120 --> 0:39:41.720
<v Speaker 2>for the opportunity to be more appreciative of my place

0:39:41.760 --> 0:39:43.799
<v Speaker 2>in this world, But how do I not let this

0:39:43.920 --> 0:39:46.520
<v Speaker 2>haunt me? How am I supposed to bring kids into

0:39:46.560 --> 0:39:49.680
<v Speaker 2>this evil world one day? Is it not morally wrong

0:39:49.840 --> 0:39:52.799
<v Speaker 2>to be responsible for sending the next generation into a

0:39:52.840 --> 0:39:56.000
<v Speaker 2>place where so much bad happens? Anyway, I hope this

0:39:56.080 --> 0:39:58.480
<v Speaker 2>email reaches you. I enjoy your perspective on things, and

0:39:58.520 --> 0:40:03.239
<v Speaker 2>I hope to hear back from you on this. I

0:40:03.400 --> 0:40:06.880
<v Speaker 2>have the exact same thoughts, oh man, listen, man, I

0:40:06.920 --> 0:40:11.640
<v Speaker 2>have the same fucking thoughts all the time. And uh,

0:40:12.040 --> 0:40:17.960
<v Speaker 2>it's very funny because, like, I don't know, I've been

0:40:18.040 --> 0:40:21.520
<v Speaker 2>to places where like I've seen like object poverty, and

0:40:21.560 --> 0:40:23.600
<v Speaker 2>horrible things, but also like you know, I mean I

0:40:23.640 --> 0:40:26.000
<v Speaker 2>live in haven't lived in like New York and LA,

0:40:26.120 --> 0:40:30.319
<v Speaker 2>Like you just see that shit outside of your house, uh,

0:40:30.880 --> 0:40:32.520
<v Speaker 2>And also like whatever you hear about it and you

0:40:32.520 --> 0:40:35.200
<v Speaker 2>see it. Yeah, yeah, you know if you're looking at

0:40:35.239 --> 0:40:39.840
<v Speaker 2>if you if you look up from your phone or

0:40:39.880 --> 0:40:43.840
<v Speaker 2>down at your phone, yeah, you'll find lots of examples

0:40:43.840 --> 0:40:48.200
<v Speaker 2>of horrible things happening, for sure. And that makes you

0:40:48.360 --> 0:40:52.720
<v Speaker 2>feel a sense of like, damn, I'm ungrateful for feeling

0:40:52.760 --> 0:40:55.399
<v Speaker 2>like shit about my problems. And I've heard people talk

0:40:55.400 --> 0:40:59.560
<v Speaker 2>about this, and I've heard people say things like like

0:40:59.680 --> 0:41:03.480
<v Speaker 2>sad and this is relative and problems are relative and

0:41:03.520 --> 0:41:05.919
<v Speaker 2>this and that and the other thing, and it's like, well,

0:41:06.160 --> 0:41:09.400
<v Speaker 2>you know, like people people say like, oh, I think

0:41:09.440 --> 0:41:11.839
<v Speaker 2>it's so annoying when I have a problem and then

0:41:11.840 --> 0:41:14.600
<v Speaker 2>someone says to me, well, you could be starving in Africa.

0:41:14.640 --> 0:41:17.000
<v Speaker 2>It could be worse, like people people get like annoyed

0:41:17.000 --> 0:41:21.359
<v Speaker 2>by that. But I I I disagree. I disagree. I

0:41:21.360 --> 0:41:26.680
<v Speaker 2>think every problem. I think every problem can totally be

0:41:26.880 --> 0:41:30.000
<v Speaker 2>solved by being like, well, at least I'm not you know,

0:41:31.360 --> 0:41:35.239
<v Speaker 2>in Sedan getting killed by a dictator. You know, I

0:41:35.239 --> 0:41:38.799
<v Speaker 2>think that's real. I hate when people say that that

0:41:38.800 --> 0:41:41.839
<v Speaker 2>that is that that's not real. Like if your brave,

0:41:41.920 --> 0:41:44.719
<v Speaker 2>if you your girlfriend broke up with you, or you

0:41:46.080 --> 0:41:53.400
<v Speaker 2>didn't sell enough necklaces on Etsy or whatever, and someone's like, well,

0:41:53.440 --> 0:41:56.320
<v Speaker 2>it could be worse. You could be you know, starving

0:41:56.360 --> 0:41:59.759
<v Speaker 2>to death in the streets, and you're like, fuck you,

0:41:59.800 --> 0:42:02.000
<v Speaker 2>that's not helpful. I'm like, fuck you, that's really helpful.

0:42:02.360 --> 0:42:05.200
<v Speaker 2>You could totally it could totally be worse. I really

0:42:05.200 --> 0:42:08.120
<v Speaker 2>try to think about that a lot. So I so

0:42:08.200 --> 0:42:13.640
<v Speaker 2>you're not crazy. You're not crazy for believing that your

0:42:13.680 --> 0:42:17.279
<v Speaker 2>life is so much better because you don't live in

0:42:17.320 --> 0:42:20.920
<v Speaker 2>a country where you could be killed by the government.

0:42:21.880 --> 0:42:26.560
<v Speaker 2>I don't think that makes you crazy. But also, at

0:42:26.600 --> 0:42:27.680
<v Speaker 2>the end of the day, you got to live your

0:42:27.680 --> 0:42:32.480
<v Speaker 2>own life, because I think if you dive too deep

0:42:32.480 --> 0:42:35.680
<v Speaker 2>into that, and I've dived really deep into that feeling

0:42:36.760 --> 0:42:40.160
<v Speaker 2>of like, well, let me just negate my entire existence

0:42:40.640 --> 0:42:43.720
<v Speaker 2>because it could be worse, and that's not helpful either.

0:42:44.760 --> 0:42:47.799
<v Speaker 2>That's not helpful either. So you know, I'm working. I'm

0:42:47.800 --> 0:42:50.560
<v Speaker 2>pondering this shit with you, and I think it's as

0:42:50.640 --> 0:42:53.160
<v Speaker 2>as as is the answer to a lot of shit.

0:42:53.440 --> 0:42:57.520
<v Speaker 2>It's a yin yang like hold a good make some

0:42:57.800 --> 0:43:01.400
<v Speaker 2>room in your brain for like a dedication. You like,

0:43:01.560 --> 0:43:08.719
<v Speaker 2>dedicate a real, nice, solid part of your brain portfolio

0:43:10.239 --> 0:43:16.520
<v Speaker 2>twenty thirty forty percent whatever you want delegate a real

0:43:16.640 --> 0:43:23.120
<v Speaker 2>solid part of your brain portfolio to. Thank God, I'm

0:43:23.239 --> 0:43:32.960
<v Speaker 2>not living in a country that's deeply impoverished in at war. Really, really,

0:43:33.760 --> 0:43:38.839
<v Speaker 2>that's worthy brain space to take, So dedicate that, But

0:43:38.840 --> 0:43:41.439
<v Speaker 2>don't dedicate the whole brain to it or else or else?

0:43:41.440 --> 0:43:46.160
<v Speaker 2>What even are you? You know you're You can't because

0:43:46.200 --> 0:43:47.920
<v Speaker 2>you have to engage with your life. And part of

0:43:47.960 --> 0:43:51.200
<v Speaker 2>engaging with your life is engaging with your problems and

0:43:51.239 --> 0:43:55.680
<v Speaker 2>your conflicts, such as your relationship with your parents. So

0:43:56.320 --> 0:43:58.440
<v Speaker 2>you still got to engage in that. You can't. Oh,

0:43:58.480 --> 0:44:02.440
<v Speaker 2>it could be worse. Your way out of your problems entirely,

0:44:03.440 --> 0:44:06.880
<v Speaker 2>but having a little bit of it could be worse.

0:44:06.920 --> 0:44:10.480
<v Speaker 2>I could be living in a bad place and subject

0:44:10.520 --> 0:44:12.840
<v Speaker 2>to horrible the horrible things of the universe. Is a

0:44:12.880 --> 0:44:14.960
<v Speaker 2>good it's a good thing to keep it in perspective,

0:44:15.080 --> 0:44:18.520
<v Speaker 2>But you can't just negate your life. So uh, I

0:44:18.520 --> 0:44:22.239
<v Speaker 2>think it's healthy. Uh Okay. And then the part where

0:44:22.239 --> 0:44:26.200
<v Speaker 2>you're like, how do I not let this haunt me exactly?

0:44:26.239 --> 0:44:27.680
<v Speaker 2>You don't want to let it haunt you. How am

0:44:27.719 --> 0:44:30.120
<v Speaker 2>I supposed to bring kids into this evil world one day?

0:44:30.200 --> 0:44:31.799
<v Speaker 2>That's another problem is you don't want to look at

0:44:31.840 --> 0:44:36.399
<v Speaker 2>the world as evil. You don't. And there's a lot

0:44:36.600 --> 0:44:40.560
<v Speaker 2>but you know, there's a lot of fucking people that

0:44:40.640 --> 0:44:47.319
<v Speaker 2>I've met and talked to who live One of the

0:44:47.360 --> 0:44:49.680
<v Speaker 2>craziest things that I've experienced in my life is like,

0:44:49.719 --> 0:44:52.840
<v Speaker 2>I feel like I've been so fucking lucky to live

0:44:53.719 --> 0:44:59.279
<v Speaker 2>the life I live, not even just like you know

0:44:59.760 --> 0:45:03.560
<v Speaker 2>this the like gecko stuff, but like just outside of that,

0:45:03.719 --> 0:45:06.840
<v Speaker 2>just like living in a growing up in like a suburb,

0:45:06.960 --> 0:45:12.839
<v Speaker 2>and like having good parents and all these things. And

0:45:12.960 --> 0:45:19.560
<v Speaker 2>I feel I feel these feelings of like of like

0:45:19.760 --> 0:45:26.480
<v Speaker 2>lack and of like, uh, depression or whatever. And I'll

0:45:26.520 --> 0:45:30.319
<v Speaker 2>meet people who've grown up with and have so much

0:45:30.480 --> 0:45:33.160
<v Speaker 2>less than I have, and their way and they just

0:45:33.280 --> 0:45:36.680
<v Speaker 2>figure out a fucking way to like be happy and

0:45:36.760 --> 0:45:41.359
<v Speaker 2>have a really positive outlook on the world. And I'm

0:45:41.480 --> 0:45:45.520
<v Speaker 2>like and that and that, and that blows my mind,

0:45:46.040 --> 0:45:50.239
<v Speaker 2>so uh. And I say that to mean that there's

0:45:50.360 --> 0:45:56.200
<v Speaker 2>probably people whose lives are worse than yours. That don't

0:45:56.760 --> 0:45:59.600
<v Speaker 2>think the world is evil. That there's people with who

0:45:59.600 --> 0:46:04.799
<v Speaker 2>are who's lives are worse than yours, that have a

0:46:04.840 --> 0:46:11.000
<v Speaker 2>better outlook on the planet than you do. And I

0:46:11.040 --> 0:46:12.800
<v Speaker 2>know that because I've met people like that, talk to

0:46:12.840 --> 0:46:17.000
<v Speaker 2>people like that, And so if they can have a

0:46:17.480 --> 0:46:20.279
<v Speaker 2>shittier life than you, and less stuff than you, and

0:46:20.320 --> 0:46:23.799
<v Speaker 2>worse problems than you and still not believe the world

0:46:23.920 --> 0:46:27.279
<v Speaker 2>is evil, then I think you can too. So I

0:46:27.719 --> 0:46:31.359
<v Speaker 2>don't think that. I don't I'm I don't think that

0:46:31.520 --> 0:46:35.239
<v Speaker 2>like object doom and being like, oh the world is

0:46:35.280 --> 0:46:40.000
<v Speaker 2>an evil, awful, terrible place. Being like, oh the world

0:46:40.080 --> 0:46:43.040
<v Speaker 2>is an evil, awful, terrible place is not fucking helpful

0:46:43.080 --> 0:46:46.520
<v Speaker 2>to anyone in the same way that being like, dude,

0:46:46.560 --> 0:46:48.759
<v Speaker 2>everything is fucking great. Like when you meet a guy

0:46:48.800 --> 0:46:51.680
<v Speaker 2>like that who's like, everything's amazing, Everything's awesome. I just

0:46:51.760 --> 0:46:55.160
<v Speaker 2>love being alive, and it's like, yeah, because you have

0:46:55.239 --> 0:46:57.799
<v Speaker 2>whatever the thing is or maybe or maybe you don't,

0:46:59.640 --> 0:47:04.279
<v Speaker 2>maybe it don't. I like a measured thing. I like

0:47:04.440 --> 0:47:09.560
<v Speaker 2>a measured perspective of the world of like something in

0:47:09.560 --> 0:47:12.880
<v Speaker 2>between those two things of like, yeah, there's some crazy

0:47:12.880 --> 0:47:15.840
<v Speaker 2>shit going on. There's a civil war in suitan there's

0:47:16.000 --> 0:47:24.400
<v Speaker 2>a horrible poverty and crazy wars and is awful stuff

0:47:24.440 --> 0:47:28.640
<v Speaker 2>going on, and you know, it's good to be aware

0:47:28.680 --> 0:47:30.239
<v Speaker 2>of that, like but also, like you know, there's a

0:47:30.239 --> 0:47:32.680
<v Speaker 2>lot of good stuff happening to people. There's great things

0:47:32.719 --> 0:47:36.759
<v Speaker 2>happening all over the world. There's right now, as I'm

0:47:36.840 --> 0:47:40.280
<v Speaker 2>right now, as I'm recording this, all over the planet,

0:47:40.760 --> 0:47:45.280
<v Speaker 2>there's like two, three, maybe four people who are eating

0:47:45.320 --> 0:47:52.200
<v Speaker 2>something and talking to each other. That's happening. That's happening

0:47:52.200 --> 0:47:56.880
<v Speaker 2>in an unfathomable amount across the planet Earth right now

0:47:57.080 --> 0:48:02.160
<v Speaker 2>is a group of two to four people eating something

0:48:02.200 --> 0:48:04.520
<v Speaker 2>and talking to each other. That's kind of amazing, that's

0:48:04.600 --> 0:48:09.280
<v Speaker 2>kind of beautiful. So you take this pros and cons

0:48:09.320 --> 0:48:12.560
<v Speaker 2>to it, and those four and those four people who

0:48:12.560 --> 0:48:17.520
<v Speaker 2>are eating something and talking to each other there they

0:48:17.560 --> 0:48:20.000
<v Speaker 2>have their own whatever problem's going on with their life,

0:48:20.000 --> 0:48:22.520
<v Speaker 2>but they have also little moments where things are good

0:48:23.320 --> 0:48:27.160
<v Speaker 2>and you have to believe that the good outweighs the

0:48:27.239 --> 0:48:31.200
<v Speaker 2>bad enough that life's worth living. And we want to

0:48:31.280 --> 0:48:34.719
<v Speaker 2>keep doing this, we want to keep doing this enough

0:48:34.760 --> 0:48:39.120
<v Speaker 2>that we'll bring a kid here. I've thought about that too, man,

0:48:39.120 --> 0:48:41.919
<v Speaker 2>I was thinking about that yesterday. I was i got

0:48:41.960 --> 0:48:46.799
<v Speaker 2>to earlier this year. I was in such a dumor

0:48:47.200 --> 0:48:50.839
<v Speaker 2>existentialist place that I was. I was on the Wikipedia

0:48:50.880 --> 0:48:54.480
<v Speaker 2>page for anti natalism. Maybe I talked about this already,

0:48:54.520 --> 0:48:57.719
<v Speaker 2>but yeah, and I was like looking through this like

0:48:57.880 --> 0:49:00.840
<v Speaker 2>movement of people who believe that it's like morally wrong

0:49:01.000 --> 0:49:03.760
<v Speaker 2>to have children and like bring consciousness into the world.

0:49:03.920 --> 0:49:06.920
<v Speaker 2>I was thinking about that. I was like, yeah, I was.

0:49:07.000 --> 0:49:09.200
<v Speaker 2>I was feeling really scared yesterday because I was thinking about,

0:49:09.239 --> 0:49:11.960
<v Speaker 2>like if I want to have a kid, and I

0:49:12.040 --> 0:49:14.040
<v Speaker 2>was like, fuck, that's a terrifying idea to me that

0:49:14.080 --> 0:49:17.960
<v Speaker 2>I like bring consciousness into the world and then my

0:49:18.160 --> 0:49:25.000
<v Speaker 2>kid is unhappy or feels, uh, you know, has exist

0:49:25.120 --> 0:49:29.200
<v Speaker 2>some bad life, and I would feel weirdly responsible for that, Like,

0:49:29.239 --> 0:49:33.160
<v Speaker 2>oh fuck, I've brought a new consciousness into this like

0:49:33.320 --> 0:49:41.440
<v Speaker 2>kind of difficult thing and now I'm responsible for that.

0:49:43.640 --> 0:49:46.840
<v Speaker 2>Like that spooks That spooks me out for sure. But

0:49:47.000 --> 0:49:50.360
<v Speaker 2>I think it's gonna be up to me to believe

0:49:51.880 --> 0:49:58.360
<v Speaker 2>that this thing that we're experiencing between two Oreo cookies

0:49:58.400 --> 0:50:02.839
<v Speaker 2>of fucking oblivion is uh is worth, it is a

0:50:02.840 --> 0:50:06.359
<v Speaker 2>cool ride, is a good thing, and that I have

0:50:06.400 --> 0:50:14.400
<v Speaker 2>the opportunity to uh like install a positive perspective upon

0:50:15.520 --> 0:50:17.160
<v Speaker 2>or dude, try the best I fucking can. I mean,

0:50:17.200 --> 0:50:18.759
<v Speaker 2>at the end of the day, you bring a kid

0:50:18.760 --> 0:50:22.560
<v Speaker 2>into this world, and you you have, of course a

0:50:22.560 --> 0:50:26.040
<v Speaker 2>lot of influences. You have probably the most influence. You'll

0:50:26.040 --> 0:50:31.480
<v Speaker 2>be the most influential person to this kid's life. And

0:50:31.920 --> 0:50:33.959
<v Speaker 2>you know, I try to do that the best you can.

0:50:34.680 --> 0:50:37.279
<v Speaker 2>But then after that, they, you know, develop their own

0:50:39.320 --> 0:50:41.680
<v Speaker 2>perception of the world. And that's kind of a beautiful

0:50:41.680 --> 0:50:45.000
<v Speaker 2>thing too. But uh, yeah, you have the opportunity to

0:50:45.080 --> 0:50:50.279
<v Speaker 2>find your own I guess joy and positive perspective and

0:50:50.320 --> 0:50:53.279
<v Speaker 2>like show and like introduce you can't make You can

0:50:53.360 --> 0:50:54.960
<v Speaker 2>lead a horse to water, but you can't make it.

0:50:55.160 --> 0:50:58.799
<v Speaker 2>You can lead a horse to good vibes, but you

0:50:58.840 --> 0:51:00.880
<v Speaker 2>can't make them take it, you know what I mean.

0:51:00.880 --> 0:51:02.880
<v Speaker 2>You can introduce your kid to like, oh, hey, this

0:51:02.920 --> 0:51:04.960
<v Speaker 2>is a way of looking at the world that I

0:51:04.960 --> 0:51:06.520
<v Speaker 2>think is good, and you can't make them take it,

0:51:06.560 --> 0:51:08.000
<v Speaker 2>but you can at least be like I tried to

0:51:08.040 --> 0:51:13.600
<v Speaker 2>introduce them to it. So is it not morally wrong

0:51:13.680 --> 0:51:15.600
<v Speaker 2>to be sending the next generation into a place where

0:51:15.600 --> 0:51:17.640
<v Speaker 2>so much bad happens? But also think about it like this,

0:51:19.120 --> 0:51:20.840
<v Speaker 2>and I think about it all the time. And I

0:51:20.840 --> 0:51:22.120
<v Speaker 2>have been the thing like I've been talking about on

0:51:22.120 --> 0:51:24.759
<v Speaker 2>the show of like bad shit has been happening forever.

0:51:24.800 --> 0:51:30.279
<v Speaker 2>I mean there's bad things have been happening forever, and

0:51:30.320 --> 0:51:34.640
<v Speaker 2>we keep that, we keep doing it, we keep doing it.

0:51:35.440 --> 0:51:38.680
<v Speaker 2>This is not new like all the stuff that we're

0:51:38.680 --> 0:51:44.319
<v Speaker 2>thinking all the like uh numerism that we're dealing with.

0:51:44.480 --> 0:51:48.279
<v Speaker 2>It's not like our problem where it's we have new problems.

0:51:48.840 --> 0:51:49.279
<v Speaker 1>But like.

0:51:51.160 --> 0:51:57.319
<v Speaker 2>You know, think about like whatever nineteen thirty whatever the

0:51:57.360 --> 0:52:01.520
<v Speaker 2>fuck being like you know, oh fuck, this Hitler guy

0:52:01.600 --> 0:52:05.200
<v Speaker 2>is kind of crazy. Uh, the world? Is it war?

0:52:05.280 --> 0:52:06.880
<v Speaker 2>Should we have a kid? I don't know about how

0:52:06.880 --> 0:52:10.319
<v Speaker 2>I feel about the world right now. You know, we

0:52:10.400 --> 0:52:13.000
<v Speaker 2>figure it out. We just keep we keep figuring it out.

0:52:13.080 --> 0:52:15.440
<v Speaker 2>And we've been and I'm pretty confident that we'll keep

0:52:15.440 --> 0:52:17.360
<v Speaker 2>figuring it out because we just we keep figuring it

0:52:17.400 --> 0:52:23.080
<v Speaker 2>out after like, uh, I mean, isn't that wild? We

0:52:23.200 --> 0:52:27.759
<v Speaker 2>people keep even in like fucking places that have experienced

0:52:28.680 --> 0:52:31.960
<v Speaker 2>a lot of turmoil, people keep having kids, and they

0:52:32.040 --> 0:52:38.040
<v Speaker 2>keep figuring it out, and they keep deciding either logically

0:52:38.160 --> 0:52:40.920
<v Speaker 2>or just or biologically their bodies. I mean, we're programmed

0:52:40.960 --> 0:52:43.160
<v Speaker 2>to fucking reproduce. We just keep deciding we want to

0:52:43.239 --> 0:52:49.239
<v Speaker 2>keep doing it. So the answer to why we keep

0:52:49.239 --> 0:52:51.680
<v Speaker 2>deciding that as a species that we want to keep

0:52:51.680 --> 0:52:53.760
<v Speaker 2>doing it is beyond me. I think it's just innate.

0:52:53.840 --> 0:52:57.360
<v Speaker 2>I think it's just as a species where like sharks,

0:52:57.440 --> 0:52:59.960
<v Speaker 2>we just want to We just fucking want to keep

0:53:00.760 --> 0:53:04.800
<v Speaker 2>going and we're gonna do it. If you believe yourself

0:53:04.840 --> 0:53:10.120
<v Speaker 2>to be part of a eight billion large collective conscious,

0:53:12.239 --> 0:53:15.279
<v Speaker 2>we've unanimously, not unanimously, but we've kind of as a

0:53:15.280 --> 0:53:20.040
<v Speaker 2>whole decided that we're gonna keep doing this until we can't.

0:53:20.880 --> 0:53:25.839
<v Speaker 2>So if you wanna, with whatever individual agency you have,

0:53:26.800 --> 0:53:31.040
<v Speaker 2>make a new person and try to raise them to

0:53:31.040 --> 0:53:35.719
<v Speaker 2>be one of the good ones, I think that's a

0:53:35.760 --> 0:53:41.040
<v Speaker 2>noble thing to do, regardless of would you believe the

0:53:41.080 --> 0:53:46.040
<v Speaker 2>current state of the world to be, because there's always

0:53:46.080 --> 0:53:49.640
<v Speaker 2>gonna be there's never gonna be a time where something

0:53:49.719 --> 0:53:51.880
<v Speaker 2>bad is not happening, and there's never and there's never

0:53:51.920 --> 0:53:55.200
<v Speaker 2>gonna be a time where something good's not happening. I

0:53:55.239 --> 0:53:57.880
<v Speaker 2>really do believe this is bad. There's so like you,

0:53:58.840 --> 0:54:03.480
<v Speaker 2>and that's why I love living in the city because

0:54:04.040 --> 0:54:07.480
<v Speaker 2>every day I see, like, if you live in like

0:54:07.480 --> 0:54:10.200
<v Speaker 2>a big American city like every day, or I guess

0:54:10.239 --> 0:54:12.840
<v Speaker 2>a lot of European cities, there's not a lot of

0:54:12.880 --> 0:54:14.520
<v Speaker 2>like a like I don't know, I haven't been to

0:54:14.560 --> 0:54:18.879
<v Speaker 2>a lot of Asian cities, but like, uh, I think

0:54:18.880 --> 0:54:21.040
<v Speaker 2>in most major places, you walk around and you see

0:54:24.320 --> 0:54:28.920
<v Speaker 2>people living in some form of poverty. But then you

0:54:28.960 --> 0:54:31.120
<v Speaker 2>also just see like if you if you're if you're

0:54:31.200 --> 0:54:33.960
<v Speaker 2>looking for it, go on a walk outside in a

0:54:34.120 --> 0:54:37.279
<v Speaker 2>populated area and you just watch like a mom like

0:54:37.320 --> 0:54:40.279
<v Speaker 2>walking with their like normal fucking things, like a mom

0:54:40.360 --> 0:54:42.239
<v Speaker 2>like walking with their kid and the kid has is

0:54:42.239 --> 0:54:46.880
<v Speaker 2>holding a thing, or like two people just like someone

0:54:47.000 --> 0:54:50.120
<v Speaker 2>just walking and existing like like, I don't know, there's

0:54:50.160 --> 0:54:53.160
<v Speaker 2>good stuff about being alive as well as bad stuff.

0:54:53.280 --> 0:54:54.960
<v Speaker 2>I've been ranking about this for too long, but I

0:54:55.000 --> 0:54:58.759
<v Speaker 2>hope you understand what I'm kind of trying to say.

0:55:00.480 --> 0:55:07.560
<v Speaker 2>All right, Okay, this is from jose Hey Lyle. I'm

0:55:07.560 --> 0:55:09.120
<v Speaker 2>an on and off listener, and I want to know

0:55:09.160 --> 0:55:12.760
<v Speaker 2>how tall you are. I'm five foot six and a half.

0:55:13.880 --> 0:55:16.800
<v Speaker 2>I was five foot seven and then I started telling

0:55:16.840 --> 0:55:19.960
<v Speaker 2>the truth. When I go on the day, when I

0:55:19.960 --> 0:55:22.120
<v Speaker 2>go on the dating apps, I'm five foot seven. I

0:55:22.120 --> 0:55:24.040
<v Speaker 2>can get away with five foot seven. I'm five foot

0:55:24.120 --> 0:55:26.279
<v Speaker 2>six and a half. I'm somewhere in between five foot

0:55:26.360 --> 0:55:32.680
<v Speaker 2>six and five foot seven, and uh, you know, I

0:55:32.719 --> 0:55:34.360
<v Speaker 2>can work with five foot seven. I could work with

0:55:34.400 --> 0:55:39.560
<v Speaker 2>five foot six, honestly whatever. I think. I've gone through

0:55:40.760 --> 0:55:44.600
<v Speaker 2>ebbs and flows about my height where sometimes I get

0:55:44.640 --> 0:55:48.239
<v Speaker 2>really insecure about it, and then other times I'm like,

0:55:48.320 --> 0:55:51.960
<v Speaker 2>it's so stupid to be insecure about your height. It

0:55:52.000 --> 0:55:57.879
<v Speaker 2>really is. It really is stupid to be insecure about

0:55:57.880 --> 0:56:06.040
<v Speaker 2>your height. I sometimes I go to bush I think

0:56:07.040 --> 0:56:13.640
<v Speaker 2>I go to Bushwick sometimes and that's a strong Mexican community,

0:56:14.280 --> 0:56:17.760
<v Speaker 2>and I think in general Mexican guys are a little shorter.

0:56:18.160 --> 0:56:20.680
<v Speaker 2>Walk around Bushwick and I'll see like a five foot

0:56:20.760 --> 0:56:28.000
<v Speaker 2>three Mexican guy with a beautiful girlfriend, and I'm like, okay,

0:56:28.080 --> 0:56:30.440
<v Speaker 2>you know, we like, this is workable, you can work

0:56:30.480 --> 0:56:35.399
<v Speaker 2>with this. Okay, wait, there's another height thing. Okay, here

0:56:35.400 --> 0:56:38.719
<v Speaker 2>we go, Yeah, there we go. All right. This is

0:56:38.719 --> 0:56:43.719
<v Speaker 2>from Danny, subject line five foot guy with women troubles.

0:56:45.120 --> 0:56:48.240
<v Speaker 2>Dear Gek, First and foremost, you and your podcast are wicked.

0:56:48.560 --> 0:56:50.960
<v Speaker 2>I've been listening to your show for almost a year now.

0:56:51.600 --> 0:56:54.200
<v Speaker 2>It's been such a refreshing way to get new perspectives

0:56:54.239 --> 0:56:57.480
<v Speaker 2>on life and hear experiences I'd never come across otherwise.

0:56:58.239 --> 0:57:01.640
<v Speaker 2>Having you on in the background during my my team calls, Outlook, Grind,

0:57:01.719 --> 0:57:04.160
<v Speaker 2>and daily work routine has made the nine to five

0:57:04.280 --> 0:57:08.240
<v Speaker 2>so much more bearable. For context, I'm twenty five years old,

0:57:08.480 --> 0:57:11.680
<v Speaker 2>five foot in stature, single and ready to mingle. I

0:57:11.719 --> 0:57:13.760
<v Speaker 2>haven't been in a relationship for the past two years.

0:57:14.080 --> 0:57:15.960
<v Speaker 2>I mentioned my height because it's been a bit of

0:57:15.960 --> 0:57:20.120
<v Speaker 2>a hurdle on dating apps. Being short isn't exactly society's

0:57:20.120 --> 0:57:23.600
<v Speaker 2>gold standard for attractiveness, and that can suck sometimes, but

0:57:23.680 --> 0:57:25.960
<v Speaker 2>it is what it is. I've been using Tinder and

0:57:26.040 --> 0:57:29.240
<v Speaker 2>Hinge for a couple of years. Met my past girlfriend's there, Okay,

0:57:29.320 --> 0:57:32.400
<v Speaker 2>fucking we got some. We got some, we got a

0:57:32.440 --> 0:57:35.640
<v Speaker 2>track record, and while I do get matches and occasional dates,

0:57:35.640 --> 0:57:38.000
<v Speaker 2>there are definitely dry spells. Since moving to a new

0:57:38.000 --> 0:57:40.480
<v Speaker 2>city last year, I've only been on two dates. I

0:57:40.480 --> 0:57:43.040
<v Speaker 2>feel like I've reached a place where I'm comfortable being alone,

0:57:43.560 --> 0:57:46.200
<v Speaker 2>but I still want to find someone to experience life with.

0:57:46.600 --> 0:57:48.720
<v Speaker 2>I'm not trying to rush into a relationship just to

0:57:48.800 --> 0:57:51.640
<v Speaker 2>check a box. I want it to feel right, so

0:57:51.880 --> 0:57:55.120
<v Speaker 2>here's someone in my mind, I matched with a girl,

0:57:55.320 --> 0:57:58.240
<v Speaker 2>let's call her April on Hinge. I was attracted to

0:57:58.280 --> 0:58:00.439
<v Speaker 2>her and after a few days of texting, we set

0:58:00.480 --> 0:58:03.840
<v Speaker 2>up a date. By the way, just like, that's another like, look,

0:58:03.880 --> 0:58:07.520
<v Speaker 2>this guy's five feet and he's able to find meet

0:58:07.560 --> 0:58:11.480
<v Speaker 2>a lady unhinged. And also, here's another cool thing I

0:58:11.560 --> 0:58:16.120
<v Speaker 2>like about this is this guy's not like, uh whatever

0:58:16.280 --> 0:58:20.360
<v Speaker 2>cards you were adults on the planet of like height

0:58:20.600 --> 0:58:26.160
<v Speaker 2>or whatever whatever it is. It's it's only over when

0:58:26.160 --> 0:58:28.720
<v Speaker 2>you when you spiral because you read this guy's email

0:58:28.760 --> 0:58:31.560
<v Speaker 2>and this guy like this guy because this guy again,

0:58:31.960 --> 0:58:37.440
<v Speaker 2>you can't. Falling into doom is not a good strategy,

0:58:38.080 --> 0:58:45.000
<v Speaker 2>as is falling into blind optimism. Look at this guy.

0:58:45.040 --> 0:58:48.040
<v Speaker 2>This guy's like, look I because this guy's like, look,

0:58:48.440 --> 0:58:51.800
<v Speaker 2>it sucks being short, but it is what it is. Like,

0:58:51.840 --> 0:58:59.120
<v Speaker 2>that's a perfect mindset. Because if this guy was like,

0:58:59.680 --> 0:59:02.960
<v Speaker 2>I'm foot six, it's over. I'll just I just have

0:59:03.080 --> 0:59:05.520
<v Speaker 2>to assume I'm never gonna be happy ever in my life,

0:59:05.760 --> 0:59:09.600
<v Speaker 2>then you know that's he's never gonna be anywhere. But look,

0:59:09.840 --> 0:59:13.520
<v Speaker 2>he's got a he's a sensible guy. He has some

0:59:13.560 --> 0:59:16.760
<v Speaker 2>fucking grip on himself and so he's able to, you know,

0:59:16.960 --> 0:59:22.640
<v Speaker 2>meet someone. Okay, I met a girl. We set up

0:59:22.680 --> 0:59:25.240
<v Speaker 2>a date. We went thrifting and grabbed a late lunch

0:59:25.480 --> 0:59:28.560
<v Speaker 2>an early dinner. I paid, did the gentleman thing. Date

0:59:28.600 --> 0:59:31.800
<v Speaker 2>went well, conversation flowed, she was receptive. At the end,

0:59:31.840 --> 0:59:33.400
<v Speaker 2>she asked if I wanted to hang out again. I

0:59:33.440 --> 0:59:37.040
<v Speaker 2>said yes. Afterwards she texted me a lot of sweet messages,

0:59:37.200 --> 0:59:40.240
<v Speaker 2>complimenting me and checking in on my day. I responded

0:59:40.400 --> 0:59:43.480
<v Speaker 2>with playful, cute replies. But now I'm not sure how

0:59:43.520 --> 0:59:45.920
<v Speaker 2>I feel about her. It feels like she's more into

0:59:46.000 --> 0:59:49.360
<v Speaker 2>me than I am into her. Oh my god, look

0:59:49.400 --> 0:59:51.200
<v Speaker 2>at this. This is not how where I thought this

0:59:51.240 --> 0:59:55.520
<v Speaker 2>email was coming. Don't get me wrong. Being chased is nice,

0:59:55.520 --> 0:59:57.000
<v Speaker 2>But I don't know if we see this turning. I

0:59:57.040 --> 0:59:58.560
<v Speaker 2>don't know if I see this turning into a long

0:59:58.640 --> 1:00:01.400
<v Speaker 2>term relationship. We have a I can date, planned moving

1:00:01.440 --> 1:00:04.920
<v Speaker 2>it at her place where young. We have urges. We

1:00:05.040 --> 1:00:07.920
<v Speaker 2>might not watch the movie if you catch my drift. Okay,

1:00:08.080 --> 1:00:09.760
<v Speaker 2>but I worry about leading her on if I go

1:00:09.840 --> 1:00:13.680
<v Speaker 2>through with it, and that thought keeps lingering. Can I

1:00:13.760 --> 1:00:17.000
<v Speaker 2>do better? It sounds shallow, but it's there, so I'm

1:00:17.000 --> 1:00:24.280
<v Speaker 2>asking for your advice. What should I do? You know, well,

1:00:24.400 --> 1:00:26.440
<v Speaker 2>the I used, by the way, the whole idea of

1:00:26.440 --> 1:00:31.640
<v Speaker 2>like can I do better? Being shallow. Can I do better?

1:00:32.200 --> 1:00:35.000
<v Speaker 2>Is not like a when you say can I do better?

1:00:36.040 --> 1:00:38.960
<v Speaker 2>It doesn't mean like, uh, I don't think that's like

1:00:39.040 --> 1:00:41.720
<v Speaker 2>reflective of the other person. That's a reflective of you.

1:00:42.600 --> 1:00:44.280
<v Speaker 2>When you say can I do better, you're not like,

1:00:44.400 --> 1:00:46.880
<v Speaker 2>can I do better? In terms of like this person

1:00:46.920 --> 1:00:49.920
<v Speaker 2>that's standing up, can I find a better person? You're

1:00:49.960 --> 1:00:53.360
<v Speaker 2>more like, can I find a person where I feel

1:00:53.360 --> 1:00:55.800
<v Speaker 2>a better feeling about them? So I don't think that

1:00:55.800 --> 1:00:59.320
<v Speaker 2>that's shallow necessarily, because what's the fucking point, right, Because

1:00:59.360 --> 1:01:02.920
<v Speaker 2>if you're like not that into this person, I don't know.

1:01:02.960 --> 1:01:05.320
<v Speaker 2>I mean everyone's experiences this shit differently. Some people they

1:01:05.680 --> 1:01:07.880
<v Speaker 2>can like be not that into some person and then

1:01:07.920 --> 1:01:12.520
<v Speaker 2>over time they really like grow with them and they

1:01:12.840 --> 1:01:21.160
<v Speaker 2>feel good with them and they kind of get a uh,

1:01:21.640 --> 1:01:23.800
<v Speaker 2>they get they get like a positive you know, they

1:01:23.920 --> 1:01:26.600
<v Speaker 2>they develop attraction over time. And that could be you,

1:01:30.000 --> 1:01:34.600
<v Speaker 2>But I don't know, maybe you're maybe you're not that guy.

1:01:34.720 --> 1:01:36.560
<v Speaker 2>Have you been that guy in the past, Like you

1:01:36.600 --> 1:01:38.480
<v Speaker 2>said you met your past girlfriend's there. Are you a

1:01:38.520 --> 1:01:41.240
<v Speaker 2>slow build guy or are you a I know when

1:01:41.280 --> 1:01:43.520
<v Speaker 2>I know it guy? If you if you've been a

1:01:43.560 --> 1:01:46.800
<v Speaker 2>slow build guy and you kind of feel in your

1:01:46.840 --> 1:01:48.880
<v Speaker 2>gut you're like I could, I could be a slow

1:01:48.880 --> 1:01:52.320
<v Speaker 2>build guy. I could slowly build attraction, then go for it.

1:01:52.360 --> 1:01:53.920
<v Speaker 2>But if you're if you know in your gut that

1:01:53.960 --> 1:01:59.400
<v Speaker 2>you're not a slow build guy, then I understand wanted

1:01:59.440 --> 1:02:01.120
<v Speaker 2>to call it, and I don't. I don't think it's

1:02:01.160 --> 1:02:04.040
<v Speaker 2>shallow because I think also, like you want to fucking

1:02:04.200 --> 1:02:05.840
<v Speaker 2>be with someone that you want to be with and

1:02:05.880 --> 1:02:08.800
<v Speaker 2>you want and so does this fucking this lady wants

1:02:08.840 --> 1:02:10.240
<v Speaker 2>to be with someone that wants to be with her.

1:02:11.200 --> 1:02:16.120
<v Speaker 2>So I don't think it's shallow to look for a

1:02:16.160 --> 1:02:18.680
<v Speaker 2>stronger connection. I don't. I don't even think it's reflective

1:02:18.720 --> 1:02:20.520
<v Speaker 2>of this lady. I think it's just reflective of like

1:02:20.560 --> 1:02:24.800
<v Speaker 2>your own brain. That's That's another thing about like attraction

1:02:24.920 --> 1:02:28.800
<v Speaker 2>is it's so it's a lot more complicated I think

1:02:28.840 --> 1:02:33.360
<v Speaker 2>than people give it credit for. I mean, obviously, in general,

1:02:33.600 --> 1:02:35.960
<v Speaker 2>like if you're more physically attractive, if you're taller, if

1:02:36.000 --> 1:02:38.840
<v Speaker 2>you're in better shape, and you know, you get people,

1:02:38.880 --> 1:02:40.280
<v Speaker 2>more people are going to be attracted to you, but

1:02:40.400 --> 1:02:45.080
<v Speaker 2>like there's still a lot of subtleties that make it

1:02:45.120 --> 1:02:47.680
<v Speaker 2>so that you can't be too black and white with

1:02:47.720 --> 1:02:51.520
<v Speaker 2>this stuff. Uh So that's that's what I suggest you

1:02:51.560 --> 1:02:56.600
<v Speaker 2>should do, is decide if you're open to a slow

1:02:56.640 --> 1:03:00.160
<v Speaker 2>burn or if you're not, then it's okay to it's

1:03:00.200 --> 1:03:10.560
<v Speaker 2>okay to withdraw respectfully. Uh let's see here, let's do

1:03:10.640 --> 1:03:20.120
<v Speaker 2>one or two more. Uh okay. This is from Malachi.

1:03:21.280 --> 1:03:25.360
<v Speaker 2>Subject line, I got stalked by a creep in prison.

1:03:26.360 --> 1:03:31.600
<v Speaker 2>My name is Malachi aka Invader mal and I wanted

1:03:31.640 --> 1:03:33.960
<v Speaker 2>to share a story with you. That's funny now, but

1:03:34.080 --> 1:03:36.960
<v Speaker 2>back then it had me shook. I was locked up

1:03:36.960 --> 1:03:38.920
<v Speaker 2>in prison and for a minute I had a cell

1:03:38.960 --> 1:03:42.760
<v Speaker 2>buddy who called himself Mike that smokes crack. I thought

1:03:42.760 --> 1:03:45.000
<v Speaker 2>it was just a weird nickname, but it turns out

1:03:45.040 --> 1:03:48.600
<v Speaker 2>he was a full blown creep. Dude. Was this fat,

1:03:48.760 --> 1:03:51.480
<v Speaker 2>oversized white guy. And at first he told me he

1:03:51.520 --> 1:03:54.400
<v Speaker 2>got locked up for breaking into a pharmacy in the daytime,

1:03:54.880 --> 1:03:58.760
<v Speaker 2>high on drugs after his girlfriend left him. Sounded believable

1:03:58.920 --> 1:04:01.920
<v Speaker 2>until it got weird. One night, I'm asleep in my

1:04:02.000 --> 1:04:04.520
<v Speaker 2>bunk and I wake up to this dude literally sitting

1:04:04.520 --> 1:04:07.440
<v Speaker 2>at the edge of my bed watching me sleep. I

1:04:07.520 --> 1:04:09.800
<v Speaker 2>jump up, I go what the hell and he hits

1:04:09.840 --> 1:04:12.240
<v Speaker 2>me with, oh, hey, sell, buddy, I was just waiting

1:04:12.280 --> 1:04:14.400
<v Speaker 2>for you to wake up. Jes got off the phone

1:04:14.400 --> 1:04:19.560
<v Speaker 2>with my pastor bro what So later that day I

1:04:19.600 --> 1:04:22.440
<v Speaker 2>told one of my big homies, yes, I'm a gang member.

1:04:22.680 --> 1:04:26.720
<v Speaker 2>Tree Top pierro a blood set. I let my og

1:04:26.960 --> 1:04:30.120
<v Speaker 2>know that Mike was watching me sleep, and he said,

1:04:30.160 --> 1:04:32.560
<v Speaker 2>if he do that again, let me know we're gonna

1:04:32.560 --> 1:04:35.680
<v Speaker 2>handle it. The funny part. I'm playing spades in the

1:04:35.760 --> 1:04:38.120
<v Speaker 2>card room later that week and I run upstairs to

1:04:38.120 --> 1:04:41.800
<v Speaker 2>grab my coffee. Mike's in the cell and goes, hey, sell, buddy,

1:04:42.040 --> 1:04:46.200
<v Speaker 2>I accidentally showed someone my butt. I'm like what. He

1:04:46.280 --> 1:04:48.800
<v Speaker 2>explains he was in the shower, bent over with the

1:04:48.800 --> 1:04:52.680
<v Speaker 2>curtain wide open, and a Muslim brother saw him. That

1:04:52.880 --> 1:04:56.439
<v Speaker 2>Muslim brother threatened to stab him for real. I went

1:04:56.520 --> 1:04:59.800
<v Speaker 2>and asked the Muslim brother myself, and he said, Bro

1:05:00.240 --> 1:05:02.520
<v Speaker 2>was straight bent over in the shower like he was

1:05:02.560 --> 1:05:06.960
<v Speaker 2>in a music video. I was done. So now I'm

1:05:06.960 --> 1:05:11.120
<v Speaker 2>thinking something's off. Rumors start going around the unit that

1:05:11.200 --> 1:05:14.200
<v Speaker 2>he's in for touching boys at a Catholic church. I

1:05:14.200 --> 1:05:16.680
<v Speaker 2>asked for his paperwork, and he sends me some fake

1:05:16.800 --> 1:05:20.160
<v Speaker 2>nonsense that said breaking and entering. I dig deeper and

1:05:20.200 --> 1:05:24.080
<v Speaker 2>find the real charges, multiple counts of molesting boys in

1:05:24.120 --> 1:05:27.400
<v Speaker 2>the church. That night I went to bed with a plan,

1:05:28.120 --> 1:05:30.560
<v Speaker 2>wake up and get him the hell out of my cell.

1:05:31.160 --> 1:05:33.320
<v Speaker 2>I wake up to him again, staring at me, this

1:05:33.400 --> 1:05:35.760
<v Speaker 2>time sitting on the bunk reading a book like this

1:05:35.920 --> 1:05:40.000
<v Speaker 2>was some lifetime movie. I said, nah, not again. I

1:05:40.160 --> 1:05:43.680
<v Speaker 2>ran to my og The whole blood set formed up.

1:05:44.160 --> 1:05:49.160
<v Speaker 2>We went in that cell, took all his commissary, his food,

1:05:49.680 --> 1:05:53.280
<v Speaker 2>and kicked him out barefoot. It was like prison house hunters.

1:05:53.680 --> 1:05:56.640
<v Speaker 2>He got moved to the old man tier and where

1:05:56.720 --> 1:05:59.440
<v Speaker 2>it is. They beat his ass and had him transferred

1:05:59.440 --> 1:06:03.120
<v Speaker 2>out to another prison. When I got home, I looked

1:06:03.200 --> 1:06:06.520
<v Speaker 2>him up. Everything was true. Not only did he have

1:06:06.600 --> 1:06:09.200
<v Speaker 2>those charges, but apparently he used to sleep up in

1:06:09.240 --> 1:06:13.080
<v Speaker 2>the rafters at church and wait until the service started

1:06:13.440 --> 1:06:18.480
<v Speaker 2>and play with himself. That man was a real life boogieman. So, Gecko,

1:06:18.920 --> 1:06:23.680
<v Speaker 2>what would you have done in that situation? Dude? I

1:06:23.680 --> 1:06:28.600
<v Speaker 2>don't I don't know what would I What would I

1:06:28.680 --> 1:06:33.520
<v Speaker 2>have done in that situation? I would have gone to

1:06:33.520 --> 1:06:37.680
<v Speaker 2>sleep and been like I'm gonna would I would have

1:06:37.800 --> 1:06:42.360
<v Speaker 2>just slept as much as I possibly could. Probably I

1:06:42.360 --> 1:06:45.280
<v Speaker 2>would have been I would have attempted to be unconscious

1:06:46.200 --> 1:06:48.400
<v Speaker 2>as long as humanly possible. I would have read a

1:06:48.440 --> 1:06:52.200
<v Speaker 2>book and be like I would have I don't know.

1:06:52.280 --> 1:06:54.080
<v Speaker 2>I don't know what I would have done in that situation. Man,

1:06:55.400 --> 1:06:57.400
<v Speaker 2>how are you doing now? Matt? Like I call in,

1:06:57.440 --> 1:06:58.640
<v Speaker 2>I want to talk to you. You see to make an

1:06:58.680 --> 1:07:00.919
<v Speaker 2>interesting guy. I want to hear more more stories about

1:07:00.920 --> 1:07:06.200
<v Speaker 2>what's going on with you. If you're listening, I want

1:07:06.200 --> 1:07:07.520
<v Speaker 2>to I want to hear what's going on. You got

1:07:07.560 --> 1:07:08.840
<v Speaker 2>a good you got it?

1:07:08.880 --> 1:07:09.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

1:07:09.080 --> 1:07:13.720
<v Speaker 2>I like the way you tell stories. Also, yeah, I

1:07:13.720 --> 1:07:16.320
<v Speaker 2>feel like I'm only hearing about Mike, who smokes crack.

1:07:16.360 --> 1:07:17.880
<v Speaker 2>I want to hear about Malachi. I want to hear

1:07:17.920 --> 1:07:25.600
<v Speaker 2>what's going on with you. Let's see here. I think

1:07:25.640 --> 1:07:28.760
<v Speaker 2>that's it. I think I think I'm done reading email

1:07:29.400 --> 1:07:33.720
<v Speaker 2>for now. Thank you guys for listening to the podcast.

1:07:33.760 --> 1:07:35.280
<v Speaker 2>I hope you enjoyed it. I hope it was a

1:07:35.280 --> 1:07:38.720
<v Speaker 2>good time for you all.

1:07:39.760 --> 1:07:39.880
<v Speaker 4>Uh.

1:07:41.160 --> 1:07:44.360
<v Speaker 2>I hope I didn't piss anyone off every time. I

1:07:44.360 --> 1:07:47.600
<v Speaker 2>I don't. I think I try to be pretty fair

1:07:48.840 --> 1:07:52.640
<v Speaker 2>about the way I do this, But sometimes I'm like,

1:07:52.680 --> 1:07:53.680
<v Speaker 2>am I pissing someone off?

1:07:53.760 --> 1:07:54.120
<v Speaker 4>Right? Now?

1:07:54.320 --> 1:07:56.760
<v Speaker 2>That's the that's the trade off of talking into a

1:07:56.800 --> 1:07:58.560
<v Speaker 2>microphone and putting it on the internet, is you can

1:07:58.680 --> 1:08:02.080
<v Speaker 2>just piss someone off somehow. I hope I don't do that. Okay,

1:08:02.080 --> 1:08:03.960
<v Speaker 2>maybe I should read one more? Should I read one more?

1:08:05.720 --> 1:08:07.520
<v Speaker 2>I'll read one more. I'll make the podcast a little

1:08:07.520 --> 1:08:18.240
<v Speaker 2>bit longer. Okay, let's see here, Hey GEK call me ismail.

1:08:18.680 --> 1:08:23.000
<v Speaker 2>Oh the subject line is h I stopped listening to podcasts.

1:08:23.320 --> 1:08:25.960
<v Speaker 2>Hey GEK call me ismail. Thanks for all the time

1:08:26.000 --> 1:08:28.240
<v Speaker 2>I spent on your podcast because I was depressed and

1:08:28.240 --> 1:08:30.799
<v Speaker 2>wouldn't leave my house and had to remember how regular

1:08:30.840 --> 1:08:34.559
<v Speaker 2>conversations worked. Now the Lexapro is working, and in a

1:08:34.600 --> 1:08:39.640
<v Speaker 2>four month turnaround, I'm sleeping with two people that know

1:08:40.240 --> 1:08:44.160
<v Speaker 2>about each other and are fine with it and love

1:08:44.320 --> 1:08:47.880
<v Speaker 2>biting me. He capitalized all those anything that I said

1:08:47.880 --> 1:08:52.639
<v Speaker 2>in that weird voice. He he had fully capitalized. Big

1:08:52.640 --> 1:08:55.920
<v Speaker 2>shout out to Lexapro. Glad I'm not dead. I don't

1:08:55.960 --> 1:08:59.240
<v Speaker 2>have a whole lot of use for podcasts now that

1:08:59.320 --> 1:09:02.120
<v Speaker 2>I quit night shifts at UPS and got my sleep

1:09:02.160 --> 1:09:05.320
<v Speaker 2>schedule right, started getting some writing done in a coffee

1:09:05.320 --> 1:09:07.519
<v Speaker 2>shop and then going up to people that I'd seen

1:09:07.560 --> 1:09:11.280
<v Speaker 2>around town, which is possible without lexapro for those interested.

1:09:11.880 --> 1:09:16.640
<v Speaker 2>I got back to therapy. Fuck, working out, meds and

1:09:16.760 --> 1:09:19.240
<v Speaker 2>sleep is fucking fine. I don't know what that last

1:09:19.240 --> 1:09:22.760
<v Speaker 2>part means, but I mean working out it's cool. I

1:09:22.760 --> 1:09:24.840
<v Speaker 2>always forget that I'm great at talking to people when

1:09:24.880 --> 1:09:26.800
<v Speaker 2>I'm hold up in my room. Thanks for getting me

1:09:26.800 --> 1:09:29.120
<v Speaker 2>through the night shift. I have listening since episode ten,

1:09:29.320 --> 1:09:31.519
<v Speaker 2>but I have to go now. Sorry, and thanks again.

1:09:32.000 --> 1:09:37.840
<v Speaker 2>Is Meil, But you know what is mil? I'm I'm

1:09:37.880 --> 1:09:40.040
<v Speaker 2>happy to hear. Oh he sent this. He sent this

1:09:40.080 --> 1:09:42.360
<v Speaker 2>email a long time. He sent this email months ago,

1:09:43.080 --> 1:09:47.280
<v Speaker 2>so he's not he's not even gonna hear this. But whatever,

1:09:47.280 --> 1:09:50.400
<v Speaker 2>he's he's having sex right now with two people that

1:09:50.600 --> 1:09:52.680
<v Speaker 2>know about each other and are fine with it and

1:09:52.840 --> 1:09:59.080
<v Speaker 2>love biting him. So that's good. Hmm. Yeah, that happens

1:09:59.120 --> 1:10:01.200
<v Speaker 2>to me all the time. Man, Oh God, that hapens

1:10:01.200 --> 1:10:02.920
<v Speaker 2>to me all the time. I'll be like, I'll be

1:10:02.960 --> 1:10:05.439
<v Speaker 2>like really fucking depressed and like not wanting to talk

1:10:05.479 --> 1:10:07.360
<v Speaker 2>to anyone, and I'll be like, shit, I think I've

1:10:07.680 --> 1:10:11.519
<v Speaker 2>there's been so many times. It happens multiple times a

1:10:11.600 --> 1:10:14.280
<v Speaker 2>week where I'm just like, shit, I don't think I

1:10:14.280 --> 1:10:16.400
<v Speaker 2>can have a conversation with another human being. I do

1:10:16.479 --> 1:10:20.720
<v Speaker 2>it for a living, and I'm just like, fuck, I

1:10:20.760 --> 1:10:24.200
<v Speaker 2>don't I can't talk to other people. And then let's

1:10:24.240 --> 1:10:26.720
<v Speaker 2>have a day where I'm like, I don't know the

1:10:26.760 --> 1:10:30.280
<v Speaker 2>fucking vivance hits right or the sun hits right or whatever,

1:10:30.280 --> 1:10:31.920
<v Speaker 2>and I'm just like, damn, I forgot that I'm actually

1:10:32.000 --> 1:10:36.439
<v Speaker 2>awesome at talking to people. You got to remind yourself

1:10:36.479 --> 1:10:39.240
<v Speaker 2>who you are. It's in there, folks. You just got

1:10:39.240 --> 1:10:42.600
<v Speaker 2>to remind yourself who you are sometimes, and then you

1:10:42.600 --> 1:10:44.920
<v Speaker 2>could end up like Ismail and stop listening to this

1:10:45.000 --> 1:10:50.000
<v Speaker 2>podcast as well. No, thank you guys for listening.

1:10:50.920 --> 1:10:51.280
<v Speaker 4>I listen.

1:10:51.400 --> 1:10:54.439
<v Speaker 2>I don't, I don't, I don't. It's funny because this

1:10:54.560 --> 1:10:57.080
<v Speaker 2>kind of harkens back to the very first caller we had.

1:10:57.160 --> 1:10:59.640
<v Speaker 2>But uh, I don't, I don't know. I listened to

1:10:59.680 --> 1:11:05.799
<v Speaker 2>a lot of podcasts just for like I guess noise,

1:11:06.640 --> 1:11:15.000
<v Speaker 2>not so much for like social interaction. I fall asleep

1:11:15.040 --> 1:11:20.200
<v Speaker 2>every night to podcasts about Nintendo games. I love that shit,

1:11:21.920 --> 1:11:24.759
<v Speaker 2>And you know what, I'm gonna go do that right now.

1:11:24.920 --> 1:11:28.080
<v Speaker 2>Actually I'm not. It's the morning time. So thank you,

1:11:28.120 --> 1:11:30.920
<v Speaker 2>guys for listening to Therapy Gecko. I'm a gecko. I

1:11:30.920 --> 1:11:32.800
<v Speaker 2>hope you enjoyed this episode. I hope this was good

1:11:32.800 --> 1:11:37.640
<v Speaker 2>for you guys. I hope you enjoyed being here. I

1:11:37.720 --> 1:11:43.320
<v Speaker 2>enjoyed recording it. I know that much. Thank you all.

1:11:44.640 --> 1:11:48.800
<v Speaker 2>Have a good night and have a good What is

1:11:48.840 --> 1:11:54.880
<v Speaker 2>it today's Wednesday? Okay, have a good weekend. Everyone, Get blessed,

1:11:55.560 --> 1:12:01.920
<v Speaker 2>see you around the universe. Repeat, Get Ghosts on the line,

1:12:02.160 --> 1:12:05.559
<v Speaker 2>taking your phone calls every night. The repeat, Get ghost

1:12:05.600 --> 1:12:08.559
<v Speaker 2>doing his ride. He's teaching you a housing over your life,

1:12:08.920 --> 1:12:11.120
<v Speaker 2>but he's not really an expert.