1
00:00:05,519 --> 00:00:08,360
Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that's getting into the perfume biz,

2
00:00:08,680 --> 00:00:15,360
Speaker 1: launching a sexy new fragrance called Yoda Aquarium, inspired by

3
00:00:15,360 --> 00:00:18,360
Speaker 1: the scent of old fish tanks that have been discarded

4
00:00:18,400 --> 00:00:23,400
Speaker 1: near busy highways. Oh, I can smell it before your

5
00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:26,800
Speaker 1: next date. Splt some on your neck. With Laser Stories,

6
00:00:27,680 --> 00:00:30,160
Speaker 1: the segment where we read weird news stories around the globe,

7
00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:32,160
Speaker 1: just like everyone else does, except we've got a laser

8
00:00:32,760 --> 00:00:36,280
Speaker 1: there's other Nemo nibblers, just don't this first Laser Stories

9
00:00:36,280 --> 00:00:40,560
Speaker 1: out of Montreal. What's the worst possible animal you could

10
00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:45,200
Speaker 1: find staring up at you while you're on the toilet?

11
00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:47,200
Speaker 2: Spider? Maybe a snake.

12
00:00:48,320 --> 00:00:51,200
Speaker 1: Well, there's a phrase that's trending online after a guy

13
00:00:51,240 --> 00:00:52,960
Speaker 1: in Montreal had to deal with one.

14
00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:55,440
Speaker 2: It's called a toilet rat.

15
00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:02,520
Speaker 1: His case was just published in a medical journal, which

16
00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:03,880
Speaker 1: is never good.

17
00:01:04,040 --> 00:01:05,679
Speaker 3: No, does that mean he's not attacked.

18
00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:11,080
Speaker 1: This person is seventy six year old Rupert Shala, and

19
00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:13,680
Speaker 1: after he found a rat and his toilet bowl, he thought,

20
00:01:13,920 --> 00:01:15,320
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna reach down.

21
00:01:15,120 --> 00:01:18,240
Speaker 2: With my bare hands, grab it and toss it outside.

22
00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:22,480
Speaker 3: But I'm starting to us Honestly, that's what my dad

23
00:01:22,480 --> 00:01:24,760
Speaker 3: would do. Let's be serious.

24
00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:26,199
Speaker 2: Well, that didn't happen.

25
00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:30,199
Speaker 1: Instead, the rat bit two of his fingers done sent

26
00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:33,280
Speaker 1: Rupert to the hospital, and Rupert's wife is in the

27
00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:35,960
Speaker 1: background yelling, I told you, I told you that.

28
00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:37,000
Speaker 3: What happens isn't they.

29
00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:39,520
Speaker 2: Have a black plague spread toilet.

30
00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:42,720
Speaker 1: Yes, he went to the er where they cleaned the

31
00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:45,800
Speaker 1: wounds and gave him a tetanus shop. But he was

32
00:01:45,880 --> 00:01:49,000
Speaker 1: back less than three weeks later with a fever, headache,

33
00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:55,640
Speaker 1: and severe stomach pang. Well, not shockingly, turns out the

34
00:01:55,680 --> 00:01:57,320
Speaker 1: toilet rat was pretty disgusting.

35
00:01:57,520 --> 00:02:02,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, this wasn't a rat.

36
00:02:04,480 --> 00:02:07,680
Speaker 1: Because of the bite, Rupert had a bacterial infection called

37
00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:12,359
Speaker 1: Wheels disease that was ravaging his kidneys.

38
00:02:12,440 --> 00:02:14,680
Speaker 3: Why do they gotta make diseases sound fun?

39
00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:17,880
Speaker 2: I know I want to be wheels up. Well, that

40
00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:18,520
Speaker 2: sound good.

41
00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:22,480
Speaker 1: It can be fatal, but luckily they treated him with

42
00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:25,720
Speaker 1: antibiotics and discharged him from the ICU a few days later.

43
00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:29,639
Speaker 2: Okay, no word on what became of the toilet rat.

44
00:02:29,639 --> 00:02:30,440
Speaker 2: Is that what you're gonna ask?

45
00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:33,079
Speaker 3: Family living.

46
00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:36,960
Speaker 1: Nate Rupert says he's taking it slow now back at

47
00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:40,120
Speaker 1: home and apparently has booby trapped his bathroom, so that

48
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:42,799
Speaker 1: if it happens again, you could just press a button

49
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:44,320
Speaker 1: deal with the clean up later.

50
00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:46,800
Speaker 2: Okay, you're not gonna get me, devil rat.

51
00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:52,359
Speaker 1: This next laser story is out of Midland, Michigan. There's

52
00:02:52,360 --> 00:02:55,240
Speaker 1: a grocery store chain called Family Fair and in one

53
00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:57,560
Speaker 1: of their locations, they have a giant sign on the

54
00:02:57,639 --> 00:03:00,799
Speaker 1: roof that sustained some wind damage in a recent storm.

55
00:03:00,840 --> 00:03:03,640
Speaker 1: So contractors were hired to come fix it, and when

56
00:03:03,680 --> 00:03:06,320
Speaker 1: they got up to the roof, they noticed something odd.

57
00:03:07,040 --> 00:03:07,639
Speaker 2: There was an.

58
00:03:07,480 --> 00:03:11,000
Speaker 1: Extension cord that led to the inside of the sign

59
00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:14,280
Speaker 1: and that's when they looked in and were shocked to

60
00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:16,559
Speaker 1: find a thirty four year old woman.

61
00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:17,200
Speaker 2: Living there.

62
00:03:20,840 --> 00:03:22,160
Speaker 3: Inside the side.

63
00:03:21,919 --> 00:03:23,200
Speaker 2: The inside of the sign.

64
00:03:23,639 --> 00:03:28,720
Speaker 1: The woman, nicknamed the rooftop Ninja, had been living inside

65
00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:31,320
Speaker 1: that store sign for almost an entire year.

66
00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:36,000
Speaker 3: It's a long time. Was she bringing dates back to

67
00:03:36,080 --> 00:03:38,559
Speaker 3: the side? How do you sleep inside?

68
00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:42,040
Speaker 1: Because she had a mattress in their jose along with

69
00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:47,280
Speaker 1: a mini desk, actual flooring laid down diy. There was

70
00:03:47,320 --> 00:03:49,720
Speaker 1: a pantry of food and even a houseplant.

71
00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:53,520
Speaker 3: Does anyone want her to be the next HGTV show?

72
00:03:54,040 --> 00:03:56,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, that she can live anywhere.

73
00:03:56,920 --> 00:03:59,320
Speaker 1: Police say that she really made it look like home

74
00:03:59,400 --> 00:04:02,040
Speaker 1: too good for her. Officers did tell her that she

75
00:04:02,120 --> 00:04:04,600
Speaker 1: needed to find somewhere else to live and offered her

76
00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:06,120
Speaker 1: housing assistance.

77
00:04:05,880 --> 00:04:06,960
Speaker 2: But she declined.

78
00:04:07,240 --> 00:04:10,280
Speaker 1: Oh why, well, she had a car and a steady

79
00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:13,480
Speaker 1: job already. She just thought Rerent was getting outrageous in

80
00:04:13,560 --> 00:04:14,280
Speaker 1: her city.

81
00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:17,080
Speaker 2: It's damn.

82
00:04:18,680 --> 00:04:20,280
Speaker 3: Moving into a billboard across the city.

83
00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:23,159
Speaker 1: Yeah, so she left, and where it is now. She's

84
00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:27,040
Speaker 1: eyeing the home depot sign just down the street.

85
00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:29,760
Speaker 2: It just strikes again, you're here to.

86
00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:30,960
Speaker 3: Get your DIY supplies.

87
00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:31,839
Speaker 2: Perfect.

88
00:04:31,920 --> 00:04:35,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, this next Lazer story is out of concert World.

89
00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:39,799
Speaker 2: Ticket prices for Taylor Swift's Eras tour got out of hand.

90
00:04:39,920 --> 00:04:42,919
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, and a lot of American Swifties who missed

91
00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:45,599
Speaker 1: out because of the costs are actually flying out to

92
00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:46,960
Speaker 1: Europe now to see her.

93
00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:49,360
Speaker 2: What, Oh my god, is that cheaper?

94
00:04:49,640 --> 00:04:50,440
Speaker 3: Yeah? How is that?

95
00:04:50,800 --> 00:04:52,599
Speaker 1: Well? Taylor kicked off that leg of the tour in

96
00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:56,479
Speaker 1: Paris just last night and Americans bought about twenty percent

97
00:04:56,560 --> 00:04:58,800
Speaker 1: of the tickets to her four shows there.

98
00:04:59,200 --> 00:05:05,000
Speaker 3: Whoa, all the French people hated the show because we

99
00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:05,400
Speaker 3: were there.

100
00:05:06,160 --> 00:05:09,799
Speaker 1: Her next stop in Stockholm has about ten thousand fans

101
00:05:09,839 --> 00:05:12,640
Speaker 1: from the US who have purchased tickets, So.

102
00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:14,640
Speaker 2: Why would they put themselves through all of this?

103
00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:20,200
Speaker 1: Because it's actually cheaper or at least comparable in price. Okay,

104
00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:25,040
Speaker 1: because Europe has tighter restrictions on ticket fees and resale prices.

105
00:05:25,360 --> 00:05:26,200
Speaker 3: That's what it is.

106
00:05:26,240 --> 00:05:29,760
Speaker 1: An Expedia spokesperson says, quote, I can either spend fifteen

107
00:05:29,839 --> 00:05:32,760
Speaker 1: hundred dollars to go see my favorite artist in Miami,

108
00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:35,560
Speaker 1: or I can take that fifteen hundred bucks and buy

109
00:05:35,600 --> 00:05:39,080
Speaker 1: a concert ticket, round trip plane fare and three nights

110
00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:40,400
Speaker 1: in a European hotel room.

111
00:05:40,600 --> 00:05:41,480
Speaker 2: I'd be pretty cool.

112
00:05:41,720 --> 00:05:45,680
Speaker 3: It's a whole experience that is pretty wild. I mean,

113
00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:48,080
Speaker 3: you can't eat or anything.

114
00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:52,000
Speaker 1: Combining a vacation with a concert experience is a growing

115
00:05:52,080 --> 00:05:57,320
Speaker 1: trend that summer calling tour tourism to tour and me

116
00:05:57,400 --> 00:05:58,960
Speaker 1: and my dad want to do it with sports like

117
00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:01,040
Speaker 1: fly to Europe and watch locker games and stuff.

118
00:06:01,279 --> 00:06:02,320
Speaker 3: Okay, you're cool.

119
00:06:02,839 --> 00:06:07,200
Speaker 1: This next laser story is out of millennial mayhem. If

120
00:06:07,240 --> 00:06:10,359
Speaker 1: you're thirty six, hang on tight. You're in for a

121
00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:13,480
Speaker 1: wild ride because a new poll found the average person

122
00:06:13,560 --> 00:06:16,560
Speaker 1: starts feeling aches and pains at age thirty.

123
00:06:16,279 --> 00:06:19,840
Speaker 2: Seven, and I can get out.

124
00:06:21,279 --> 00:06:23,719
Speaker 1: That's when your back starts barking and your knees start

125
00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:29,440
Speaker 1: to buckle. And surprisingly, back pain wasn't actually people's top complaint.

126
00:06:29,760 --> 00:06:30,360
Speaker 3: What is it?

127
00:06:30,440 --> 00:06:32,320
Speaker 1: The big ones where thirty seven year olds say they

128
00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:36,520
Speaker 1: have pain are in their legs, their neck, and their shoulders,

129
00:06:36,839 --> 00:06:37,200
Speaker 1: not in.

130
00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,200
Speaker 3: Your but pain in the butt.

131
00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:42,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, not really.

132
00:06:43,279 --> 00:06:45,760
Speaker 3: More pain than I did when I was saying what

133
00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:46,479
Speaker 3: hurts on me?

134
00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:49,159
Speaker 1: So what would millennials give up in order to be

135
00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:51,599
Speaker 1: pain free? Twenty two percent of us would give up

136
00:06:51,640 --> 00:06:54,200
Speaker 1: social media to feel fewer aches and pains.

137
00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:54,880
Speaker 3: Wow.

138
00:06:55,360 --> 00:06:57,320
Speaker 2: Eighteen percent would give up cheese.

139
00:06:58,160 --> 00:07:02,200
Speaker 3: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Those people are lactose intolerance. They took

140
00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:03,600
Speaker 3: that survey, I just know it.

141
00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:06,200
Speaker 2: And twenty five percent say they would give up coffee.

142
00:07:06,480 --> 00:07:09,520
Speaker 3: Oh oh god, those lasts two. There's no way. Yeah.

143
00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:11,880
Speaker 1: What would this guy give up to not have the

144
00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:18,000
Speaker 1: throbbing shell pain? Absolutely nothing, because he wants it makes

145
00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:19,040
Speaker 1: him feel alive.

146
00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:21,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, and that sound.

147
00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:22,760
Speaker 1: Means the laser shories has come to it end for

148
00:07:22,800 --> 00:07:26,720
Speaker 1: the day. We're gonna do it the same time on Monday.

149
00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:30,320
Speaker 3: Yep, that's the day. On Monday, Brooke and Jeffrey in

150
00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:30,840
Speaker 3: the morning