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Speaker 1: And I don't know what to do because my psycho

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Speaker 1: guidance counselor says I can't date my girlfriend because she's

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Speaker 1: in a wheelchair.

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Speaker 2: But I'm not backing down. You know, you think that

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Speaker 2: a guidance counselor would give good guidance, good guidance, not

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Speaker 2: bad guidance.

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Speaker 1: Yes, but good No, No, apparently not every guidance counselor

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Speaker 1: is completely infallible.

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Speaker 2: I think we're being guided astray right now.

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Speaker 1: I think we are. I think we are. So there's

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Speaker 1: a girl I'm friends with, Louise, who is in a wheelchair.

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Speaker 1: We've been acquaintances since the start of high school, but

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Speaker 1: recently we become friends. The things are rolling around nice,

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Speaker 1: mostly with this one.

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Speaker 2: They led.

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Speaker 1: She asked me if I wanted to go out next

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Speaker 1: Sunday with her. In her words, you know, like a date. Ooh,

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Speaker 1: that's a moves, Yes she does. We met at a

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Speaker 1: quiet coffee shop near her house. I was worried that

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Speaker 1: I would get nervous and it would be awkward, but

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Speaker 1: instead we spent two hours having a great time getting

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Speaker 1: to know each other. Afterwards, we went to the park

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Speaker 1: sat on a bench. Did both of you sit or

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Speaker 1: did she sit in her wheelchair and you say on the.

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Speaker 2: Bench, I'm going to go with option number two? You

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Speaker 2: think so, do I win? I don't know. We'll see.

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Speaker 1: We watched the world go by while she held my hand,

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Speaker 1: which was unexpected.

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Speaker 2: That's kind of cute, dude, super cute. That's cute. This

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Speaker 2: seems like a fault in our stars kind of story. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: We called it today and it started to get dark,

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Speaker 1: so I took her home. She gave me a tight

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Speaker 1: hug and we said our goodbyes. Okay, I have if

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Speaker 1: anyone in a wheelchairs like it goes to I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I'm very curious what the dynamic is like. Are they

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Speaker 1: holding hands and is she still wheeling one side of

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Speaker 1: her wheelchair?

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Speaker 2: Well, they were sitting on they were sitting, but then

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Speaker 2: they were they were holding hands and walking right. Oh,

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Speaker 2: let's see.

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, yeah, sorry, she held my hand while they

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Speaker 1: were sitting. So when you're sitting, I imagine she's sitting

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Speaker 1: in the wheelchair and he's sitting on the bench. So

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Speaker 1: they're on a bench end, they're sitting sting. Okay, okay, cool, cool.

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Speaker 1: Col I just wanted to I'm interested. I'm interested in

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Speaker 1: the logistics. I enjoyed spending time with her, and I

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Speaker 1: think she felt the same. But I'm not sure if

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Speaker 1: I should ask her out so soon. Sounds like she

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Speaker 1: wants me to ask her out.

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Speaker 2: Sounds like she's down the clown baby.

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Speaker 1: Edit took everyone's advice and asked her on a second date,

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Speaker 1: and she couldn't have been happier when she said yes.

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Speaker 1: It's so cute, very adorable. This is awesome. I love

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Speaker 1: this story. I was called at a class today by

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Speaker 1: my guidance counselor because she's concerned that I am breaking

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Speaker 1: the law by having a relationship with the disabled girl,

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Speaker 1: because I am apparently abusing my position of power over her.

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Speaker 2: That's ridiculous. Stop it. You must not date the sweet girl.

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Speaker 2: What is the deal? I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I mean, like I can understand maybe if like he

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Speaker 1: was dating a girl with a mental handicap.

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Speaker 2: This seems so mutual. This seems this seems completely mutual.

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Speaker 2: She initiated the day. She was like, you know, hey,

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Speaker 2: I like a date. Then he was like, oh, let's go.

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Speaker 1: It's not a power dynamic thing. If they're like on

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Speaker 1: the same level mentally. It seems like everything is on

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Speaker 1: the same page. Yeah, it'll be weird. Guidance counselor. We

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Speaker 1: are bull sixteen. We have a few classes together. I'm

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Speaker 1: not her teacher, so I think that means I'm not

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Speaker 1: in a position of power.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I have helped her a few times with homework.

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Speaker 2: Does that count? Oh? No, it doesn't count. Sweetie? Can

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Speaker 2: you help me with these timestables? I don't know, babe,

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Speaker 2: what can you do for me? Opie says, she's perfectly

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Speaker 2: normal mentally. She just can't walk, So it's not like

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Speaker 2: I'm taking advantage of her in any way. We've been

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Speaker 2: on one date, had lunch together a few times. I

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Speaker 2: can't see how this is inappropriate. Is my guidance teacher correct? Well,

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Speaker 2: I get in trouble because I'm dating someone who is

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Speaker 2: not as able bodied as I am. I don't want

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Speaker 2: to get either of us in trouble. Any advice is appreciated.

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Speaker 2: There's another update. But this is ridiculous. Okay, here's why

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Speaker 2: I think what's happening. I think the guidance counselor is

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Speaker 2: trying not to be ablest, and by attempting to do so,

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Speaker 2: is being ablest. Yeah, because it's like, oh, you can't

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Speaker 2: date her because she's in a wheelchair. That's basically what

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Speaker 2: she's saying.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like the off and that happens a

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Speaker 1: lot with like people trying to be like like like

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Speaker 1: they have good intentions, but they're trying to be so

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Speaker 1: woke that they actually go woke to the other way.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it goes around the corner.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's like I think, like, like, I imagine

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Speaker 1: that guidance counselor is like trying to protect this girl,

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Speaker 1: but it's just like very poorly educated on this topic. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: poorly guided for counselor. There's an update. Since there were

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Speaker 1: so many of you commenting and giving me great advice

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Speaker 1: on my post here and in the private messages.

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Speaker 2: I think you deserve an update. Oh thanks, Opie, thank you.

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Speaker 2: My parents, my friend will call her.

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Speaker 1: Luise and I met with the head teacher and the

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Speaker 1: guidance teacher first in the morning. The head teacher, who

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Speaker 1: was out of the loop in the situation, asked me

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Speaker 1: about my relationship with Louise. I answered honestly that she

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Speaker 1: asked me out and that we'd been on two dates

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Speaker 1: together and we'd occasionally have love together. She said that

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Speaker 1: was fine, and someday off the class.

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Speaker 2: She then asked.

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Speaker 1: Louise if I had made her uncomfortable, had hurt her,

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Speaker 1: or tried to force her to do certain things. She

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Speaker 1: replied that I was caring and made her feel special,

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Speaker 1: and that if she was suggesting that I had taken

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Speaker 1: advantage of her, she could fuck off. Just talking nice talk,

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Speaker 1: and then she quickly left on the verge of tears

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Speaker 1: my parents and asked the guidance teacher what exactly she

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Speaker 1: meant by me abusing my position of power, And it

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Speaker 1: became a parent to my mom that she had no.

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Speaker 2: Idea what she was talking about.

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Speaker 1: She thought because she had seen me helping Louise in

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Speaker 1: the library with things, and because I occasionally pushed her around,

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Speaker 1: that I was some sort of help her care for her,

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Speaker 1: and not her classmate and date. After some back and

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Speaker 1: forth between the four of them, according to another friend

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Speaker 1: who walked by the office, some of it was quite heated,

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Speaker 1: it was agreed that apologies would be made to both

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Speaker 1: of us, the guidance teacher would learn to do her

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Speaker 1: job like she should be able to, and the matter

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Speaker 1: would be dropped. In return for not making this public

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Speaker 1: and causing the school yet more embarrassment, Wow, bro, so

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Speaker 1: embarrassing for the school educated. Do you have to be

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Speaker 1: It's just like, yeah, bad news. The guidance teacher didn't

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Speaker 1: actually understand what the phrase abusive position of power actually meant.

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Speaker 1: Good news. It turns out you were all correct. I'm

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Speaker 1: not in any legal trouble. Happy news. I had my

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Speaker 1: first kiss and Louise called me her boyfriend, so at

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Speaker 1: least some good came out of it.

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Speaker 2: Oh, my man, let's go. Let's go Louise.

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Speaker 1: Also great for Louise, like actually standing up for yourself too.

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Speaker 2: This is adorable story, great relationship. The only wrench to

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Speaker 2: the throne in here is this stupid guidance count. I

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Speaker 2: just let these people be in love my Like, this

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Speaker 2: is the cutest thing ever.

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Speaker 1: Oh all right, well, we love you and we'll see

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Speaker 1: you soon. I go fall in love with someone, come

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Speaker 1: follow you. Hey, you are so cute. You deserve someone.

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Speaker 1: Yeah you do, Yeah you do.

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Speaker 2: Today if fed up by blazing some sweet greens, driving

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Speaker 2: and my father almost challenged me to a round.

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Speaker 1: Of fisticuffs, blags it for twenty and then raise Somehow

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Speaker 1: that sounds sounds like what's going on is blazing and raising.

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Speaker 2: Hell, he's clearly racing towards destruction. Nice obligatory. This didn't

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Speaker 2: actually happen today. This was all the way back in

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Speaker 2: tenth grade. Whoa tenth grade? What are you doing in

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Speaker 2: tenth grade? Me? I was I was listening to dubstep, dude, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: dubstep fuck I remember that. Yeah, drummers loved dubstep because

156
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Speaker 2: it's so like percussive. So like my whole friend group

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Speaker 2: was like really into I think I remember in like

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Speaker 2: eighth grade, there was this song gold Digger that I

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Speaker 2: was really not gold gold, gold finger gold something, you know,

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Speaker 2: I know, a gold dust, gold dust gold. I can't

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Speaker 2: get enough a massun.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, absolute class banger classic. Yeah, I know that's like

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Speaker 1: the first thing a kiva.

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Speaker 2: What were you doing in tenth grade? What was I

165
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Speaker 2: doing in tenth grade? I was swimming for school. It's

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Speaker 2: going to an all boys jesuit school.

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Speaker 1: No, definitely not not not not nice either, definitely not me. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I don't think. I don't think too much. I think

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Speaker 1: I was still doing web comics.

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Speaker 2: Nice. Hell yeah, dude, hell yeah yeah, so you know

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Speaker 2: I was getting I love that. Oh yeah, ba bro,

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Speaker 2: those girls are just flipping through those things. Oh he's

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Speaker 2: so funny, such a great personality. Oh man, god A

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Speaker 2: love it. Okay, okay, to set the scene, I had

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Speaker 2: just recently gotten my first car. It was a ninety

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Speaker 2: six Jetta, and man was that thing rad? Oh sweet

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Speaker 2: ride bro? Oh yeah. Also I had recently started blowing

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Speaker 2: the Devil's lettuce. Oh oh he's a cool guy, A

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Speaker 2: cool freaking dude. Whoa you Definitely if you have a

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Speaker 2: car and you're just freaking blazon blazing it at sixteen,

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Speaker 2: you definitely think you're like the coolest thing, coolest, yeah,

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Speaker 2: coolest kid on the block. Definitely. This new found pleasure

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Speaker 2: of mind was awesome. But being so new to it,

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Speaker 2: I didn't know all the things that being a now

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Speaker 2: seasoned stoner seem like common sense, things like outside perception.

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Speaker 1: Ah yeah, yeah, you gotta know what people are thinking

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Speaker 1: of you blazing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Well, now, like you know, it's like legal and everything. Now,

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Speaker 1: like you still want to be cautious and just aware

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Speaker 1: of your surrounding.

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Speaker 2: You don't want to just like walk up to order

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Speaker 2: something you're just laughing in their face and everyone's like

194
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Speaker 2: that guy's high's order please? This is a Wendy's. So there,

195
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Speaker 2: I am I'm over at my friend's house and we're

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Speaker 2: smoking a bit of gaganza in my car. Naturally, we

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Speaker 2: got the munchies and started discussing our meal plane. That's

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Speaker 2: when my dad calls me. Yo, oh, I'm hungry, want

199
00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:06,920
Speaker 2: to go get some cheese steaks. I'm hungry, the dad,

200
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Speaker 2: let's get cheesecakes. I'm cheese steaks, cheesecake or cheese steaks.

201
00:10:12,840 --> 00:10:16,079
Speaker 2: Cheese steaks, cheese steaks. Yo, I'm hungry. Want to get

202
00:10:16,120 --> 00:10:19,960
Speaker 2: some cheese steaks at Disco stanzas my favorite cheese steak place.

203
00:10:22,800 --> 00:10:24,520
Speaker 2: I go. I He is like, Yo, you don't know

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Speaker 2: what my favorite cheesesteak plays is. Yeah, this must be

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Speaker 2: known information. We have to pause here for a second.

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Speaker 2: In my stoned little brain, Jesus himself has part of

207
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Speaker 2: the clouds and given me a little wink as if

208
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Speaker 2: to say, I got you, bro enjoy yourself. Why why?

209
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Speaker 2: Because they had the munchies and then like, oh my god,

210
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Speaker 2: let's just get cheese steak a stone or dream like literally,

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Speaker 2: the solution comes to you. You don't have to do

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Speaker 2: any work. The idea of eating my favorite food while

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Speaker 2: high was borderline erotic. Wow, I love if this guy's

214
00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:08,000
Speaker 2: getting chubbed from a cheese stick. Oh dude, he's getting

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Speaker 2: bricked for them cheese star. I'd never tried real food

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Speaker 2: stone before, so this was about to be insane. I respond,

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Speaker 2: there's a bear shit in the woods. I'll be home

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Speaker 2: in ten minutes quick. In other words, yes, I drive,

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Speaker 2: I know, I know home and park in my driveway.

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Speaker 2: My dad is on the porch waiting. He comes down

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Speaker 2: and tells me to drive and wants to see how

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Speaker 2: I'm liking the new car. Okay, not that big of

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Speaker 2: a deal. I can drive super cautious and everything will

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Speaker 2: be a okay, dude, his dad's gonna find it out.

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Speaker 2: There's no way. The only way I can imagine what

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Speaker 2: actually happened is like a very mild version of Wolf

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Speaker 2: of Wall Street. That's immediately But I was thinking like

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Speaker 2: that the kailudes, Yeah, just like like you can't just

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Speaker 2: crawling out of it. Oh my god, dude, put put

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Speaker 2: in the scene for Wolf of Wall Street, yes, where

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Speaker 2: he thought he drove the Ferrari fine, and then it

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Speaker 2: showed the real version. The carnage, the garnage, the carnage.

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Speaker 2: I must have been going twenty five the whole way

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Speaker 2: stopping at stop signs and verbally spelling stop as I stopped.

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Speaker 1: The man's blaze out of his mind. Apparently probably a

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Speaker 1: little servy too. Crap, I don't even know.

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Speaker 2: We go to disco stanzas he looks like he's in

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Speaker 2: a bad mood now, And for the life of me,

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Speaker 2: I just can't understand how someone could be unhappy at

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Speaker 2: a time like this. It's Chase steak time, baby, Come on,

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Speaker 2: get it through your thick freaking head that we're about

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Speaker 2: to eat delicious cheese steaks. What is a cheese steak?

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Speaker 2: It's you don't know what cheese steak is. It's like

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Speaker 2: a sandwich with I believe it's like slight, like like

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Speaker 2: roast beef, or like slice.

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Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yeah, like Philly cheese steak, Philly cheese. Okay, okay,

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Speaker 1: see I always I always get it associated with like

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Speaker 1: the Philly That's true.

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Speaker 2: It usually does have the Philly in front. So I know,

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Speaker 2: I literally choke on Philly cheese steaks all the time

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Speaker 2: because the cheese and the like meat is so like stringy.

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Speaker 2: Yeah that I just now it's like a psychosomatic and

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Speaker 2: I'll just start like gagging.

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Speaker 1: Well, the thing is It's like when you have really

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Speaker 1: stringy cheese, it just like keeps holding on, it keeps going.

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Speaker 2: Now you have like a freaking ten. Yeah, you're like

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Speaker 2: string chewing in my mouth and trying to swallow it,

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Speaker 2: and all it does is just keeps not good, very

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Speaker 2: bad gag refle terrible porn star, jam more bank. Yeah

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Speaker 2: for robbing a bank. I know I said terrible porn star.

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Speaker 2: You would make oh yeah, yeah, our only fan. This

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Speaker 2: is not going to be good. I walk inside. He

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Speaker 2: follows me in, and I look back to ask what

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Speaker 2: he's about to get. I know I'm an idiot, So

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Speaker 2: whether you about the girl stone cold, straight faced with

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Speaker 2: that parental if we weren't in public, I would f

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Speaker 2: you up right now. Look in his eye. He says,

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Speaker 2: give me your keys. Damn confused, whoa, you're high as shit?

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Speaker 2: Give me your keys. When I tell you, I have

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Speaker 2: never laughed so hard in all of my life, I

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Speaker 2: completely lost it. So adding insult to injury, just can

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Speaker 2: you imagine You're literally like, I'm about to lay down

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Speaker 2: the law in this way? He just laughs in your face.

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Speaker 2: It was like the first time I saw that scene

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Speaker 2: in Step Brothers when they were in the bunk beds

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Speaker 2: in the middle of this small sandwich shop. People are

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Speaker 2: in line, just trying to order their food, and I

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Speaker 2: am sobbing with laughter. It feels like an hour that

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Speaker 2: I'm laughing. But I finally pull myself together and I'm

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Speaker 2: just sitting there with that zen post hard post hard laugh,

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Speaker 2: feeling smiling ear to ear. I look at my dad again,

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Speaker 2: and we are not on the same page. He's probably

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Speaker 2: even more PiZZ Wait, what give me your effing keeees?

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Speaker 2: I hand him my keys, ready to be beat up,

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Speaker 2: right in the store, right on that spot, And to

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Speaker 2: my surprise, we just order our food and sit there

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Speaker 2: and eat silent. We get back to the car and

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Speaker 2: when we get in, he looks into my door card

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Speaker 2: and he sees half a blunt, picks it up and

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Speaker 2: holds it in front of me. You're an ef an idiot,

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Speaker 2: and this is not your car anymore.

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Speaker 1: Honestly fits the punishment, fits the grind, it deserves it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I sit in silence for the rest of the ride.

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Speaker 2: We get home, I do my thing, which whatever that is,

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Speaker 2: what does that means? Do your thing? And then go

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Speaker 2: to bed. Next morning, I come back from school and

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Speaker 2: my car isn't there. My dad literally sold it while

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Speaker 2: I was in school. Wow, that's quick work, dude. He's

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Speaker 2: probably just like someone Bucks. Just tell it that you.

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Speaker 2: I need my son to come home and not see

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Speaker 2: it here like oh my god, but honestly, like kind

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Speaker 2: of deserve it. Moral morals. Moral of a story. Get

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Speaker 2: stoned and drive places. No, no, that's not the moral

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Speaker 2: of the story.