WEBVTT - Ariel Tweto 0:00:00.120 --> 0:00:02.120 When I do live gigs around the country, I'll be 0:00:02.160 --> 0:00:04.840 honest with you. I sell T shirts and swag to 0:00:04.920 --> 0:00:07.080 the folks who are there, and then people always say, 0:00:07.280 --> 0:00:09.640 can we get this swag without sitting through a whole 0:00:09.680 --> 0:00:10.200 evening of you. 0:00:10.720 --> 0:00:13.360 Well, it's happened. It's finally here. 0:00:13.680 --> 0:00:16.840 You can buy Craig Ferguson merch on the Craig Ferguson 0:00:16.920 --> 0:00:19.960 Merch website and you can buy it for yourself or 0:00:20.000 --> 0:00:23.000 someone you hate or someone you love. For more information 0:00:23.079 --> 0:00:25.200 and link to the web store, please go to the 0:00:25.239 --> 0:00:28.800 Craig Fergusonshow dot com. That's all lowercase, the Craig Ferguson 0:00:28.840 --> 0:00:33.760 show dot com. My name is Craig Ferguson. The name 0:00:33.760 --> 0:00:38.199 of this podcast is joy. I talked to interest in 0:00:38.280 --> 0:00:44.040 people about what brings them happiness. When I was doing 0:00:44.040 --> 0:00:46.080 the late night show, I talked to a lot of people. 0:00:46.360 --> 0:00:49.800 Some of them became my friends. That's the category we're 0:00:49.800 --> 0:00:53.440 in today. Aeriel Tweto first came to my attention when 0:00:53.440 --> 0:00:56.560 she was on a TV show called Flying Wild Alaska. 0:00:56.880 --> 0:00:59.320 But the minute I met her, I knew we'd be friends. 0:00:59.560 --> 0:01:01.840 And then but she became friends with my wife and 0:01:01.960 --> 0:01:03.080 I knew it was compulsory. 0:01:03.520 --> 0:01:04.800 Here's my friend a reel tweet. 0:01:10.520 --> 0:01:12.240 Oh again, is that what we're doing today? 0:01:12.360 --> 0:01:14.440 Well, Megan always gets her nails done. 0:01:14.720 --> 0:01:15.240 Let's do it. 0:01:15.440 --> 0:01:16.640 She's a nails done in parison. 0:01:16.880 --> 0:01:20.959 All right, so let's but here's the thing, because we 0:01:21.000 --> 0:01:24.280 were talking about wearing our headphones. Yeah, because it makes 0:01:24.319 --> 0:01:26.240 you feel like a pilot. It does, doesn't That does 0:01:26.480 --> 0:01:27.919 like we're flying planes together. 0:01:28.120 --> 0:01:28.920 Oh, where should we. 0:01:28.880 --> 0:01:30.280 Go your flight controls? 0:01:30.720 --> 0:01:35.640 Like, no, let's do your flight controls. 0:01:36.000 --> 0:01:38.080 You've got two big things on your fingers. What's going on? 0:01:38.319 --> 0:01:38.440 Oh? 0:01:38.520 --> 0:01:42.080 I was in Nicaragua surfing and then I one night, 0:01:42.160 --> 0:01:44.319 I mean, my buddies are out night surfing, and I 0:01:44.360 --> 0:01:46.479 was walking back in and I slipped on a rock. 0:01:47.240 --> 0:01:48.000 Oh my god. 0:01:48.320 --> 0:01:50.800 So I slipped on the rock and I slashed my 0:01:50.880 --> 0:01:53.200 leg open. So I was more worried about my leg. 0:01:53.320 --> 0:01:55.720 And then I was like, something's wrong with my fingers. 0:01:56.120 --> 0:01:58.320 And I put my hand up to the like the moonlight. 0:01:58.880 --> 0:02:02.280 All of them looked like they were all bent, like 0:02:02.280 --> 0:02:05.640 like upside down el's. And so I remember my dad 0:02:06.200 --> 0:02:07.640 like he fell down the steps one time, and I 0:02:07.680 --> 0:02:09.960 remember seeing him pull his fingers. So I was like 0:02:10.960 --> 0:02:12.480 I guess I'm going to have to pull my fingers. 0:02:12.480 --> 0:02:13.440 So I pulled your fingers. 0:02:13.480 --> 0:02:14.560 I pulled all of them. 0:02:14.639 --> 0:02:19.240 But wouldn't you pass gas? Like, I don't know when 0:02:19.280 --> 0:02:19.959 someone else pulls you. 0:02:20.160 --> 0:02:21.000 I think it's when someone else. 0:02:21.520 --> 0:02:23.679 If you pull, it's like tackle it yourself. You can't 0:02:23.680 --> 0:02:24.520 pull your own finger. 0:02:24.800 --> 0:02:25.120 It was. 0:02:25.360 --> 0:02:26.400 It was disgusting, though. 0:02:26.440 --> 0:02:29.839 It was worth seeing your hand mangled than I think 0:02:29.840 --> 0:02:32.239 the actual pain. But now I have two broken fingers 0:02:32.320 --> 0:02:34.079 and the other two I set right now. 0:02:34.320 --> 0:02:37.480 But now my fathers I set them and then totally 0:02:37.560 --> 0:02:40.760 badass area. It's so mental because what we just kind 0:02:40.760 --> 0:02:43.880 of glossed over is that you were night surfing in Nicaragua, Yeah, 0:02:43.919 --> 0:02:46.400 which I feel like makes me feel like you were 0:02:46.440 --> 0:02:48.520 on a special ops thing for the CIA. 0:02:48.639 --> 0:02:49.639 And that's the truth of it. 0:02:49.840 --> 0:02:52.840 Why what were you night? Why night surfering in why Neckaraga? 0:02:52.880 --> 0:02:53.480 What were you doing there? 0:02:53.600 --> 0:02:54.480 I know people there? 0:02:54.600 --> 0:02:56.320 No, I didn't, but now I do. I feel like 0:02:56.360 --> 0:02:59.360 I know half the country. Yeah, it was amazing. I 0:02:59.400 --> 0:03:01.040 just needed to get out of Alaska, and so I 0:03:01.040 --> 0:03:03.040 was like I usually go to Costa Rica to surf, 0:03:03.120 --> 0:03:04.639 and so this time I was like, I'm going to 0:03:04.680 --> 0:03:07.040 try Nicaragua, and I ended up going to Popoio. 0:03:07.800 --> 0:03:09.480 It was amazing, it was I was there. 0:03:09.600 --> 0:03:10.760 I was supposed to be there for a week and 0:03:10.760 --> 0:03:13.920 I ended up staying for like three Yeah, and then yeah, 0:03:13.960 --> 0:03:15.720 it was the last day I was there. And so 0:03:16.000 --> 0:03:18.040 I met a guy who had a ruler. 0:03:19.840 --> 0:03:20.960 Did you meet a guy? I? 0:03:21.000 --> 0:03:27.080 Actually yeah, but no. 0:03:27.200 --> 0:03:28.760 So a guy had a ruler and we cut the 0:03:28.800 --> 0:03:30.600 ruler in half and he set my fingers with the 0:03:30.680 --> 0:03:33.640 ruler until I came back to America and got a 0:03:33.680 --> 0:03:34.520 proper splint. 0:03:34.880 --> 0:03:36.280 But now they smelled fish. 0:03:36.520 --> 0:03:39.320 Yeah, well it's you know, it's the sea and you 0:03:39.360 --> 0:03:41.040 were swimming. Why did they smell like fish? 0:03:41.160 --> 0:03:43.440 Because last night I ate a can of sardines in 0:03:43.480 --> 0:03:45.000 my like the oil trip. 0:03:45.080 --> 0:03:45.920 Now are you? 0:03:46.280 --> 0:03:50.680 Are you living the Inuit lifestyle in American hotels? So like, 0:03:50.920 --> 0:03:52.960 for those of you who are not familiar with your story, 0:03:53.240 --> 0:03:54.840 I'm just going to take you back a little bit. 0:03:55.040 --> 0:03:56.960 I know you well, and you know we've been friends 0:03:56.960 --> 0:03:59.640 since I met you and late night ten years ten 0:03:59.720 --> 0:04:02.560 years or eleven, I think it's more. Yeah, yeah, I. 0:04:02.560 --> 0:04:03.760 Didn't have gray here back then. 0:04:03.840 --> 0:04:07.080 You didn't either, Yeah, I assure dead, and you don't 0:04:07.160 --> 0:04:07.720 have any. 0:04:07.600 --> 0:04:09.360 Now I have a lot, but I don't mind it. 0:04:09.520 --> 0:04:10.520 I don't I don't know. 0:04:10.680 --> 0:04:13.880 It's gray is okay, but it's againting really white now 0:04:14.280 --> 0:04:14.880 not yours? 0:04:15.080 --> 0:04:17.000 Yeah, I like it. Silverfox. 0:04:17.200 --> 0:04:22.159 No, it's not silver Fox anymore. It's Santa. It's the 0:04:22.200 --> 0:04:25.839 battle when you get because I'm nearly sixty two, Jesus. 0:04:25.880 --> 0:04:28.719 The battle now is to not turn in a Santa. 0:04:28.800 --> 0:04:30.239 That's that's my last mission. 0:04:30.279 --> 0:04:30.920 Well you look good. 0:04:31.160 --> 0:04:33.159 Well that's in a Santa way. 0:04:33.720 --> 0:04:35.640 No, a nice way. 0:04:35.920 --> 0:04:39.600 Well, thank you. Now let's let's start. Because you're for 0:04:39.800 --> 0:04:42.640 I first became aware of you. I first heard about 0:04:42.640 --> 0:04:44.520 you and you but because of Flying mild Alaska, the 0:04:44.560 --> 0:04:47.440 show that you did for Discovery, right, which is about 0:04:47.440 --> 0:04:51.839 you and your family's airline, because your dad around the airline. 0:04:52.040 --> 0:04:52.320 Era. 0:04:52.520 --> 0:04:53.040 Yeah, Era. 0:04:53.160 --> 0:04:55.760 Well it started out Hagland's and so was my dad 0:04:55.760 --> 0:04:57.919 and his buddy Mike Haglin, and they started it and 0:04:57.960 --> 0:05:00.920 then it merged to Era and it became. 0:05:00.760 --> 0:05:03.279 Raven, right, is that what it's called now, Raven without 0:05:03.279 --> 0:05:03.560 an E. 0:05:04.560 --> 0:05:07.599 My dad's too cheap to like spend extra money on 0:05:07.640 --> 0:05:08.440 the extra letters. 0:05:10.800 --> 0:05:12.880 This rave. 0:05:13.520 --> 0:05:15.760 My mom's obsessed with ravens, and so my dad named 0:05:15.800 --> 0:05:16.280 it for her. 0:05:16.400 --> 0:05:19.040 I got a raven. I saw that, a big raven 0:05:19.120 --> 0:05:21.080 right there in my own but not a real one. 0:05:21.080 --> 0:05:23.520 It's a tattoo obviously. Yeah, that's not a real raven. 0:05:23.560 --> 0:05:24.320 Not a real raven. 0:05:24.960 --> 0:05:27.680 Being practical to walk around with a raven all the time. 0:05:28.240 --> 0:05:28.680 I don't know. 0:05:29.240 --> 0:05:30.080 Do you want to get some ink? 0:05:30.560 --> 0:05:30.680 Oh? 0:05:30.760 --> 0:05:32.640 Yes, I was just going to say, A great a 0:05:32.680 --> 0:05:37.480 great woman in Queen's Brooklyn. She's a green Point. She's amazing. 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:39.479 Okay, yeah, I'm definitely going to do it. Would you 0:05:39.480 --> 0:05:40.360 get one too? Yeah? 0:05:40.400 --> 0:05:44.560 Yeah, I need to get more, right, there's always for more. Yeah, 0:05:44.560 --> 0:05:46.120 maybe we'll go over this afternoon. We'll give a call. 0:05:47.240 --> 0:05:51.040 So listen, you're do you do this show? Flying well Alaska? 0:05:51.080 --> 0:05:54.520 But let's talk a little bit about your family, because 0:05:55.440 --> 0:05:58.599 your dad starts up this airline, right, he's a bush pilot. 0:05:58.839 --> 0:05:59.839 So yeah, he flew. 0:06:00.640 --> 0:06:03.520 I'm not sure exactly how he flew from my grandpa's company, 0:06:03.560 --> 0:06:06.040 and my grandpa started Ryanair and so my. 0:06:06.040 --> 0:06:07.760 Dad, I know the airline. 0:06:07.920 --> 0:06:11.080 No, it's a little smaller one in Alaska. It's actually 0:06:11.120 --> 0:06:11.560 a big one. 0:06:11.600 --> 0:06:14.840 But then my dad got fired and then by like 0:06:14.839 --> 0:06:17.719 my uncle or something, someone fired him and because he 0:06:17.760 --> 0:06:19.720 had too many ideas and whatever. 0:06:19.800 --> 0:06:21.760 But then a lot of ideas. 0:06:22.000 --> 0:06:23.920 Yeah, and then so he got a plane and then 0:06:23.960 --> 0:06:27.800 started his competition airline and then then it just like 0:06:28.000 --> 0:06:30.680 grew and grew and he had like just from like 0:06:30.960 --> 0:06:31.960 all like growing up. 0:06:32.480 --> 0:06:35.000 So you were in these these like bush planes since 0:06:35.000 --> 0:06:36.360 you were a babysically. 0:06:35.839 --> 0:06:36.880 It was zero. 0:06:37.040 --> 0:06:39.479 Yeah, we flew everywhere and then the only way in 0:06:39.520 --> 0:06:41.960 and out of our village is by airplane. So my 0:06:42.040 --> 0:06:43.560 parents like they were like, if you want to go 0:06:43.600 --> 0:06:45.000 see the world or if you want to get out 0:06:45.000 --> 0:06:46.160 of this village, which I did. 0:06:46.240 --> 0:06:47.440 I love it, but I like. 0:06:47.600 --> 0:06:48.520 Can't I hear you? 0:06:48.839 --> 0:06:52.240 I've never been uncle, right, yeah, right, So Uniclee is 0:06:52.279 --> 0:06:54.200 a village in Alaska of about how many. 0:06:54.040 --> 0:06:55.640 People, like six hundred and fifty. 0:06:56.200 --> 0:06:57.960 That's not really a village. It's a small town. 0:06:57.960 --> 0:06:58.680 It's a small town. 0:06:58.720 --> 0:07:01.600 Yeah, we're the biggest like hub in our area, so 0:07:01.800 --> 0:07:03.839 where most of the villages around us have like one 0:07:03.920 --> 0:07:05.679 hundred and fifty two hundred and fifty people. 0:07:05.760 --> 0:07:08.800 And your dad wasn't Alaska native though, right. 0:07:08.720 --> 0:07:11.640 Nope, He's Norwegian, so he grew up in Minnesota. 0:07:11.720 --> 0:07:13.480 Auto the relations grew up in Minnesota. 0:07:13.600 --> 0:07:16.280 Yeah, there they are all over, but then a lot 0:07:16.320 --> 0:07:19.720 of Minnesotans end up in Alaska, which is awnest. 0:07:19.760 --> 0:07:22.200 Because it's because of the Norway thing. They keep looking 0:07:22.200 --> 0:07:24.920 for places that are really cold and then hospitable, which. 0:07:24.760 --> 0:07:26.800 I don't get. I was born in the wrong place. 0:07:26.800 --> 0:07:28.400 I was supposed to be born in, like Africa or 0:07:28.760 --> 0:07:29.920 somewhere in Central America. 0:07:30.000 --> 0:07:32.360 I like the sun. I don't you know. I've been 0:07:32.400 --> 0:07:33.400 back in Scotland too much. 0:07:33.440 --> 0:07:34.640 Now I'm not going to do it anymore. 0:07:34.800 --> 0:07:38.400 Yeah, it's too I gotta go sunny time anyway. So 0:07:39.080 --> 0:07:41.280 your dad, he meets your moment in Alaska. 0:07:41.360 --> 0:07:43.840 So he got a hockey scholarship and moved up when 0:07:43.880 --> 0:07:47.400 he was sixteen sixteen seventeen, and then played hockey and 0:07:47.520 --> 0:07:50.679 was really really good. He bomb was a goalie wow, 0:07:50.680 --> 0:07:53.000 and he was like he was amazing apparently, and then 0:07:53.040 --> 0:07:56.560 he became a welder after that he had really crappy hips, 0:07:56.600 --> 0:07:58.560 and so he stopped playing hockey, became a welder and 0:07:58.560 --> 0:08:02.080 started building all the boats in like northwest Alaska, like 0:08:02.120 --> 0:08:05.960 all the crazy crab and fishing boats. Yeah, and so yeah, 0:08:06.320 --> 0:08:08.440 he was obsessed with welding, like he loved welding. 0:08:08.480 --> 0:08:10.960 And then get obsessed with welding. It's the weirdest thing. 0:08:11.000 --> 0:08:13.160 I know a couple of people who are really into it. 0:08:13.240 --> 0:08:15.400 Yeah, you should see his boats that he built. Like 0:08:15.520 --> 0:08:18.440 half the villages, seems like everyone had his boats. And 0:08:18.480 --> 0:08:21.000 then yeah, and then he just then he yeah, became 0:08:21.000 --> 0:08:23.280 a I don't think he ever got his pilot's license. 0:08:23.400 --> 0:08:24.360 He just started flying. 0:08:24.480 --> 0:08:26.200 Stop it. Your dad didn't have a pilot. 0:08:26.400 --> 0:08:28.240 Yeah, I don't think he actually got his like private 0:08:28.240 --> 0:08:29.080 pilot's license. 0:08:30.360 --> 0:08:33.760 Then that's that's an interesting story right now. 0:08:34.160 --> 0:08:35.440 And then he met my mom and then. 0:08:36.040 --> 0:08:38.760 Right, so your your mom is Nate for Alaska. 0:08:39.040 --> 0:08:41.920 My mom's wild. I can't wait for you to meet her. 0:08:42.120 --> 0:08:44.560 Yeah, she seems very she seemed lovely on that show. 0:08:44.600 --> 0:08:46.600 Oh yeah, she's feisty. She carries a bull whip. 0:08:46.720 --> 0:08:49.720 She's like like becauses like a fisherman sailor. 0:08:51.000 --> 0:08:54.199 Yeah, she carries a bullwhip. That's scary, it is. I 0:08:54.240 --> 0:08:55.480 don't know if I want to meet her now, I 0:08:55.679 --> 0:08:58.600 would just do it like FaceTime. So last year, because 0:08:58.600 --> 0:09:01.200 I haven't seen you since your dad'zact. Right, that was 0:09:01.280 --> 0:09:05.000 really intense. Well, all this was really intense because your dad. 0:09:05.000 --> 0:09:08.360 We lost your dad during that right, yeah, in June, 0:09:08.960 --> 0:09:09.920 June of last year. 0:09:10.080 --> 0:09:12.320 Mm hmm, so it's going to be a year soon. 0:09:12.640 --> 0:09:16.480 But it doesn't feel I yeah, it doesn't feel real still, 0:09:16.520 --> 0:09:18.200 and I think that's why I just don't want to 0:09:18.240 --> 0:09:19.439 be at home. It's hard. 0:09:19.640 --> 0:09:21.920 Like I still like I dream about him, which is good, 0:09:21.920 --> 0:09:23.720 and like I write him letters all the time, and 0:09:23.960 --> 0:09:26.599 so I'll just be like, hey, I haven't felt you 0:09:26.679 --> 0:09:28.240 in a while or something, and then he'll show up 0:09:28.240 --> 0:09:30.160 in a dream, my last dream yet. 0:09:30.280 --> 0:09:33.000 I have that with my parents even Yeah, yeah, that 0:09:33.000 --> 0:09:36.080 that that goes on forever. That's that's okay. You know, 0:09:36.480 --> 0:09:38.480 you don't worry about that. He's not going anywhere in 0:09:38.520 --> 0:09:39.360 that sense, you know. 0:09:39.600 --> 0:09:40.480 Yeah, I don't know. 0:09:40.559 --> 0:09:43.400 I like there was a couple of times, like surfing, 0:09:43.640 --> 0:09:45.680 he used to call me do det and my first 0:09:45.720 --> 0:09:47.760 time ever catching his green wave, like going all the 0:09:47.800 --> 0:09:50.400 way down this wave, I jumped off of it, and 0:09:50.440 --> 0:09:57.479 then I like, I sound weird, but. 0:09:55.200 --> 0:09:56.480 But there's nothing wrong being weird. 0:09:56.480 --> 0:09:59.520 People are gould have stopped with the weird is somehow negative. 0:09:59.720 --> 0:10:03.000 Yeah it's awesome, Yeah, but okay, well I don't sound 0:10:03.040 --> 0:10:04.960 word but I heard him, like I heard him say 0:10:05.040 --> 0:10:07.640 like good job do that, and then I felt him. 0:10:07.880 --> 0:10:09.959 I felt him everywhere and that's when I knew. I 0:10:10.040 --> 0:10:12.360 was like, oh man, he's still like here. And then 0:10:12.600 --> 0:10:15.040 then I started. I couldn't stop crying, but they were 0:10:15.160 --> 0:10:18.960 like happy tears, and I hadn't like I've just been sad. 0:10:19.000 --> 0:10:22.200 So I know, but I mean, that is so that's 0:10:22.240 --> 0:10:23.960 what the world it is about right now? 0:10:23.880 --> 0:10:29.720 Then what's happening with you? Like like running away from Okay. 0:10:28.360 --> 0:10:31.520 I mean you got to deal with it. You deal 0:10:31.559 --> 0:10:34.080 with it, you know. I mean it's like, how's your mom, Doe? 0:10:34.400 --> 0:10:37.320 She's I mean they were together pretty much every day 0:10:37.320 --> 0:10:40.440 for thirty six years, right, and they were best friends, 0:10:40.760 --> 0:10:44.320 so she's it's she she's so strong. He's like having 0:10:44.360 --> 0:10:46.040 to deal with me and my sisters because I mean 0:10:46.080 --> 0:10:48.280 he was my best friend, yeah, and then my little 0:10:48.480 --> 0:10:50.560 like everyone was so we were so close, and I 0:10:50.559 --> 0:10:53.760 thought I was like, I didn't think it was I 0:10:53.760 --> 0:10:56.880 thought he was invincible, Like I like, there's no way 0:10:56.920 --> 0:11:00.280 that could have happened. And yes, I guess it's never 0:11:00.320 --> 0:11:00.880 been very. 0:11:00.760 --> 0:11:03.760 Shocked when when I heard, right, because I like, I texted. 0:11:03.400 --> 0:11:04.920 You right away, yeah, to thank you for this. 0:11:05.040 --> 0:11:07.480 It's the weirdest thing though, because you know, when you 0:11:08.040 --> 0:11:11.160 don't know where to call someone, or like when when 0:11:11.200 --> 0:11:15.240 you experience grief like I've had it, you know you 0:11:15.320 --> 0:11:19.840 clearly have had it very recently. People kind of nobody 0:11:19.840 --> 0:11:22.480 knows how to deal with you sort of thing. It's 0:11:22.559 --> 0:11:24.320 kind of like it's kind of like you got something 0:11:24.400 --> 0:11:25.560 on yet yeah, it's. 0:11:25.440 --> 0:11:26.880 Like yeah, no one knows what to say. 0:11:26.920 --> 0:11:30.960 It's super awkward, like like I yeah, I don't and 0:11:31.000 --> 0:11:33.960 I don't know how to like respond like my like 0:11:33.960 --> 0:11:35.880 people are like how are you doing? And like my 0:11:36.600 --> 0:11:39.240 little sister is very like blunt, and she's just like, 0:11:39.240 --> 0:11:41.480 how do you think I'm doing? And I'm like, yeah, good, 0:11:41.520 --> 0:11:44.760 But now I'm realizing, like I'm like I'm taking it 0:11:44.840 --> 0:11:46.440 every like day, like today, I'm good. 0:11:46.800 --> 0:11:48.400 Yeah, a couple of days ago, not so much. 0:11:48.800 --> 0:11:50.679 I think I think that, But I think that's okay. 0:11:50.840 --> 0:11:53.440 I mean the thing that you know, it's how it 0:11:53.480 --> 0:11:56.960 looks on you. I mean I think that whenever anyone 0:11:58.240 --> 0:12:01.000 has an agenda for how you should feel about any 0:12:01.040 --> 0:12:03.400 particular thing, I think that's more about them than it 0:12:03.440 --> 0:12:05.960 is about you. You feel how you feel. You know, 0:12:06.200 --> 0:12:10.560 it's and when people say like get over things, like 0:12:10.600 --> 0:12:12.880 you don't get for shit like that. That's crazy. 0:12:12.920 --> 0:12:15.199 You learn to live with it, you don't get over Yeah. 0:12:15.320 --> 0:12:18.640 Now you know what this made me realize how how 0:12:18.880 --> 0:12:21.800 I thought I was a compassionate, like empathetic person before 0:12:21.840 --> 0:12:22.160 all this. 0:12:22.800 --> 0:12:25.760 Now it made me realize, like what a ding dong? 0:12:26.200 --> 0:12:28.720 Like just when my friends like we're going through loss 0:12:28.840 --> 0:12:30.680 or something, I'm like, let's just go hiking. 0:12:30.920 --> 0:12:32.880 Come on, like get over it pretty much. 0:12:32.920 --> 0:12:35.200 And now I'm like, if someone said that to me, 0:12:35.600 --> 0:12:37.760 I would like punch me in the face, right because 0:12:37.800 --> 0:12:38.240 I'm just. 0:12:38.240 --> 0:12:40.760 Like, oh, not in the gates. Well I was going 0:12:40.840 --> 0:12:41.240 to say to. 0:12:41.200 --> 0:12:46.400 You, no, I love hiking and stuff. 0:12:46.400 --> 0:12:49.960 But yeah, well, I think sometimes it is with people 0:12:50.000 --> 0:12:52.439 when you're talking about grief. People are so uncomfortable with 0:12:52.559 --> 0:12:54.280 the idea of it and they hate it so much 0:12:54.400 --> 0:12:56.400 that they want you to not have it too in case. 0:12:56.520 --> 0:12:59.880 You know what I mean, It's like it it's it's 0:13:00.080 --> 0:13:02.959 really it's it's I think I know I get a 0:13:03.000 --> 0:13:03.320 little O. 0:13:03.480 --> 0:13:04.920 C D around it as well. 0:13:04.840 --> 0:13:06.679 Like if I feel grief, I'm going to feel more 0:13:06.679 --> 0:13:08.480 grief about you know what I mean. It's like weird, 0:13:08.960 --> 0:13:13.800 but I remember when my dad died that. 0:13:13.920 --> 0:13:14.720 How old were you? 0:13:14.840 --> 0:13:17.080 I was I was in my forties, you know, I 0:13:17.200 --> 0:13:20.920 was like, I just started late night and he died. 0:13:20.920 --> 0:13:24.360 But he he was seventy five and he was not 0:13:24.480 --> 0:13:26.960 old really if you think about it. But he died 0:13:26.960 --> 0:13:29.320 of cancer, so we can't you it was common. But 0:13:29.360 --> 0:13:32.240 when he died, he you know, and the grief is 0:13:32.280 --> 0:13:33.760 such a weird thing. I think it's kind of it's 0:13:33.760 --> 0:13:36.719 about like your fingers. You know, you get mashed up 0:13:37.080 --> 0:13:39.040 and it's like, what the fuck am I going to 0:13:39.080 --> 0:13:42.280 do with this? And then little by little it starts 0:13:42.280 --> 0:13:44.079 to kind of go, but you're never you know, you're 0:13:44.080 --> 0:13:45.280 always going to have the scars. 0:13:45.480 --> 0:13:47.360 Yeah, kind of like fat fingers. 0:13:47.679 --> 0:13:53.040 Well, I was going to say, on your finger. 0:13:53.320 --> 0:13:56.800 Now, I wish I could do that, Like I only 0:13:56.800 --> 0:13:58.840 put on like on one finger or something. 0:13:59.800 --> 0:14:03.080 No, I go Like when I was about four years old, 0:14:03.080 --> 0:14:04.240 I had a more cycle act. 0:14:04.400 --> 0:14:08.400 And I broke my collar bone and three ReBs and 0:14:08.440 --> 0:14:09.600 I can still feel it right now. 0:14:09.840 --> 0:14:11.319 I still feel it right now talking to you. I 0:14:11.320 --> 0:14:12.360 can still feel it all the time. 0:14:12.480 --> 0:14:15.719 But at the time I got it, it was agony, 0:14:16.080 --> 0:14:18.360 and it was agony and agony and agony, and then 0:14:18.480 --> 0:14:21.400 it's no agony all the time. Sometimes I think about 0:14:21.400 --> 0:14:24.040 it makes me twinge. I think grief is a little 0:14:24.160 --> 0:14:28.400 like that, like when it arrives, it arrives. 0:14:27.840 --> 0:14:30.840 Like, oh my god, it's a tsunami. 0:14:30.920 --> 0:14:34.360 It's awful, and it's just so random sometimes you really, 0:14:34.960 --> 0:14:37.520 yeah you could just I was in ARII looking at 0:14:37.560 --> 0:14:39.480 gloves and I saw like a pair of gloves that 0:14:39.520 --> 0:14:41.680 you used to wear, and then I just lost it 0:14:41.720 --> 0:14:43.960 in the middle of So it's like in the middle 0:14:43.960 --> 0:14:46.160 of the store. And then there's just certain things that 0:14:46.560 --> 0:14:49.200 just set you off. And then like for me, the 0:14:49.240 --> 0:14:53.360 hardest part is like envisioning like the last seconds and stuff, 0:14:53.360 --> 0:14:55.000 and so I have to like cut myself off or 0:14:55.080 --> 0:14:57.840 like get super busy with something. Otherwise I just like 0:14:57.920 --> 0:15:01.840 picture it like how it happened. And then I'm like, 0:15:01.920 --> 0:15:04.080 then that make sets me off, And. 0:15:04.440 --> 0:15:06.360 Yeah, yeah, I can see how you would do that 0:15:06.400 --> 0:15:08.360 to yourself. But the thing I remember, I mean you 0:15:08.360 --> 0:15:11.640 said earlier, it's so fast, you know, ways. 0:15:11.560 --> 0:15:11.960 Was your dad. 0:15:12.400 --> 0:15:15.760 He was sixty eight, sixty eight, you know, he lived 0:15:15.760 --> 0:15:18.760 for sixty eight years and two seconds of it. Yeah, 0:15:18.760 --> 0:15:21.400 it's not much, you know, And I'm not trying to 0:15:21.400 --> 0:15:23.480 make you feel better about it, but you know, but 0:15:23.760 --> 0:15:25.800 I think if I was in your shoes, then I 0:15:25.800 --> 0:15:27.560 think with my dad, my own dad as well, is 0:15:27.600 --> 0:15:29.520 try to get a sense of perspective about it, you 0:15:29.520 --> 0:15:29.960 know whatnot. 0:15:30.520 --> 0:15:33.040 Yeah, that was his biggest fear too, is getting old 0:15:33.680 --> 0:15:36.840 like he was. He started memorizing stars, like he memorized 0:15:36.880 --> 0:15:39.480 over three hundred and sixty some stars because he was 0:15:39.480 --> 0:15:40.960 afraid of losing his memory. 0:15:41.080 --> 0:15:42.840 Yeah, Agaimers. Yeah. 0:15:42.880 --> 0:15:45.000 So he would have me and my sisters, he had 0:15:45.040 --> 0:15:46.800 like flash cards and we would just lay in the 0:15:46.840 --> 0:15:49.160 snow and he would like we would have to quiz him, 0:15:49.200 --> 0:15:51.760 and he yeah, he just doesn't didn't want to get old. 0:15:52.320 --> 0:15:53.760 Yeah, And so in that I. 0:15:53.800 --> 0:15:56.600 Understand that too. Like I'm sixty one, I'll be sixty 0:15:56.600 --> 0:15:58.640 two years old in a few weeks. It's terrifying. 0:15:58.840 --> 0:16:01.400 Yeah, it's really didn't you think it's not gonna happen 0:16:01.440 --> 0:16:03.880 to me, But you know, it kind of. 0:16:04.120 --> 0:16:08.840 Does start my rising stars or maybe not that that works. 0:16:09.000 --> 0:16:13.720 I don't think it was, but I now, of course 0:16:13.760 --> 0:16:21.520 I'll be like, oh yeah. The Crake Ferguson Fancy Rascals 0:16:21.560 --> 0:16:25.160 Stand Up Tour continues throughout the United States in twenty 0:16:25.320 --> 0:16:28.560 twenty four. For a full list of dates and tickets 0:16:28.600 --> 0:16:31.600 go to the Crake Ferguson show dot com slash tour. 0:16:32.160 --> 0:16:37.960 So you have that. So you still eat the seal 0:16:38.000 --> 0:16:39.120 flipper and all that stuff. 0:16:39.240 --> 0:16:41.600 Oh yeah, still trying to take how did. 0:16:41.480 --> 0:16:44.800 You get a seal flipper in? Now, let's talk through 0:16:44.800 --> 0:16:46.880 the seal flipper because we were talking about that. I 0:16:46.920 --> 0:16:48.920 don't have the enzymes to eat that, right, you have 0:16:48.960 --> 0:16:50.400