Speaker 1: Boom. If you thought four hours a day, minutes a
Speaker 1: week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of
Speaker 1: the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He treats
Speaker 1: crackheads in the ghetto Cutter the same as the rich
Speaker 1: pill poppers in the penthouse the clearing House of Hot
Speaker 1: takes break free for something special. The Fifth Hour with
Speaker 1: Ben Maller starts right now. Nine That it does is
Speaker 1: we are in the air everywhere, the vast power of podcasting,
Speaker 1: the global reach of I Heart Media, as we are
Speaker 1: bloviating your day away on this Sunday, as we are
Speaker 1: at it again eight days a week, eight days a week,
Speaker 1: because four hours are not enough, because four hours are
Speaker 1: not enough. And we'll get into the podcast the meat
Speaker 1: and Potatoes, And before we get into that, we welcome
Speaker 1: in for better or worse, and probably for worse, a
Speaker 1: man who we learned on Friday where the name Gagon
Speaker 1: came from our friend Mike North. If you haven't heard
Speaker 1: that podcast, go back and download it. It's great. Mike
Speaker 1: North told the whole story about the legend of Gagon.
Speaker 1: But there he is right over there. Look none other
Speaker 1: than David gag On himself, West of the four oh
Speaker 1: five guests. That's right, Ben, I got my blue bat
Speaker 1: out and you should too. A happy Father's Day to
Speaker 1: to all of you wherever you may be, and uh
Speaker 1: even for the single mothers out there that are playing
Speaker 1: the role as mother and father for everything that you
Speaker 1: guys are doing to support your family's your young ones
Speaker 1: as well. Um, it's a bright new day, and of course,
Speaker 1: um a brand new episode. So what's on the dockets?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, we'll get right into it. As Marcel and
Speaker 1: Brooklyn likes to say, one of our regular callers on
Speaker 1: the radio show, We've Got Pop Quiz, were supposed to
Speaker 1: do pop Quiz yesterday. We didn't get the pop quiz.
Speaker 1: We got pop Quiz. Don't stick to sports and the
Speaker 1: mail bag. So it to it right now, We'll start
Speaker 1: with pop Quiz. I love this. Uh these are actual
Speaker 1: questions from actual Uh well, he's not actual questions. These
Speaker 1: are actual things that I found surfing around different quizzes
Speaker 1: and whatnot, which are kind of fun. So a recent
Speaker 1: survey says it takes the average American roughly six attempts
Speaker 1: to do this. What is it? Something that pretty much
Speaker 1: everyone does these days, but it takes about six attempts
Speaker 1: to do six attempts to do. What the fuck? Um man,
Speaker 1: you've got me stumped. Six attempts to do I don't know,
Speaker 1: Uh take a selfie that people take a selfie. They're like,
Speaker 1: I don't like that. Let's do it again. I don't
Speaker 1: like the angle. I don't like you know, we gotta
Speaker 1: change it around, all right, As opposed to going and
Speaker 1: burst mode. You you're trying to perfect the selfie now,
Speaker 1: not what I do a lot is when I don't
Speaker 1: do it anymore. But I used to leave voicemail messages,
Speaker 1: you know at the end they would say, all right,
Speaker 1: if you would like to re record prush three? Oh yeah, whatever?
Speaker 1: And I always I would recorded like seven or eight times.
Speaker 1: They never liked the sound of it. I hated it,
Speaker 1: hated it, hated it, hated it, hated it, and I
Speaker 1: keep really redoing it. Was never good enough. Now, if
Speaker 1: we went sexist mode, what do you think do you
Speaker 1: think that men probably try to perfect their selfies two
Speaker 1: times three and then women try to do it nine, ten,
Speaker 1: eleven times or what you're so sexist? Well no, but
Speaker 1: didn't get this podcast canceled. If they don't get canceled
Speaker 1: on Friday, you're not woke. You're not woke. If he woke,
Speaker 1: if they don't get canceled on Friday, I think we're
Speaker 1: all right. I don't know if you're talking about it,
Speaker 1: I don't know what you're referring to it all, but
Speaker 1: I will I will point out that. Yeah. I think
Speaker 1: my experience is I'm usually like a one or two guy.
Speaker 1: I'm a one or two guy, and more like usually two.
Speaker 1: My wife is you, I don't like that, let's redo it,
Speaker 1: or I'm not The lighting is not right? You know
Speaker 1: that kind of thing? Well, probably because you don't smile
Speaker 1: on most of your pictures, and she usually encourages it.
Speaker 1: A smile. I smile on my pictures. I don't. I
Speaker 1: don't know what you want me to do. I'm not
Speaker 1: a clown. New survey says nearly of Americans have done
Speaker 1: this for the first time in the past two months.
Speaker 1: What is it? Uh? How about cooked? Cook? It's not
Speaker 1: a terrible answer. The correct answer is actually, create a
Speaker 1: music playlist. Create a music playlist. A lot of people
Speaker 1: have never done that. These days, Americans spent more on
Speaker 1: this industry compared to twenty years ago. In the year
Speaker 1: two thousands, so the gaming no, not gaming music is
Speaker 1: that because of what was it? Napster? Was that around
Speaker 1: two thousand when that took over in the music industry
Speaker 1: went in the toilet because you can pirate, pirate everything music,
Speaker 1: pirate voice tracks, you can pirate any constructional stuff. To
Speaker 1: be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Maller
Speaker 1: Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific on
Speaker 1: Fox Sports Radio and the I Heart Radio. A recent
Speaker 1: survey reveals we're doing pop quiz. Recent survey reveals that
Speaker 1: most people love the smell of this, but there's about
Speaker 1: fift of us they think it's snaks perfume. No, the ocean, oh,
Speaker 1: smell that's over near you, west of the four or
Speaker 1: five big body of water, little lake out there called
Speaker 1: the Pacific Beach. I mean, anytime you want to come out,
Speaker 1: even for our listeners. Manhattan Beach is beautiful. Elsa Gundel,
Speaker 1: Hermosa Rodondo. More of a Newport Beach. Gig oh, I
Speaker 1: love Newport Beach. The cougars there, cougars are coming. The
Speaker 1: cougars are coming. San Diego, which is great, San Diego, wonderful,
Speaker 1: laid back to San Diego and there's no four oh
Speaker 1: five there, so you don't have to worry about that.
Speaker 1: There's no west of the four or five in San
Speaker 1: Diego because it doesn't go to the San Diego all
Speaker 1: the way ends in Irvine the four oh five freeway. Um,
Speaker 1: so there is that there's something really there's just Gouna
Speaker 1: Beach is also not west of the four or five
Speaker 1: because the four h five ends right about where Laguna
Speaker 1: be Yeah, it's a little past where the four oh five. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Laguna Niguel like forest, that area is something really really
Speaker 1: proud about being west of the four oh five. It's
Speaker 1: one way to look at it. For those of us
Speaker 1: that are blue collar and people represent the working class,
Speaker 1: like being east of the four or five. We respect
Speaker 1: honest days work while you work from home and I
Speaker 1: work from studios. Well, it's a thing called the apocalypse,
Speaker 1: and if you want to have a problem, you contact
Speaker 1: Scotch Shapiro, who is the one of the bosses there
Speaker 1: at Fox Worts Radio and set this up. All right,
Speaker 1: Americans spend more than seven hundred million dollars a year
Speaker 1: on this food product. What is it in fact something
Speaker 1: that many people will probably be doing all summer long? Um, well,
Speaker 1: they're barbecuing. I would imagine food product. Um uh do
Speaker 1: do mustard and catch up? Do do? It is a
Speaker 1: condiment barbecue sauce. Okay. Now, I was told by a
Speaker 1: guy one time that if the barbecue is good, if
Speaker 1: you have smoked the meat well enough, you have seasoned
Speaker 1: the meat, you do not need barbecue sauce. That is amateur,
Speaker 1: that you should not go with the barbecue sauce. I've
Speaker 1: been told, Yeah, I'm kind of curious in that special
Speaker 1: kind of uh steak that that you had received in
Speaker 1: a package about a month ago, that you have not
Speaker 1: in my freezer. I have not made it yet. I will.
Speaker 1: I am going to cook it. It's not hot enough yet.
Speaker 1: I told you the story. I mean this weekend. I
Speaker 1: will next weekend. Not something you're gonna pick up at
Speaker 1: Vans or rouse, you know, and I understand you. Calm down,
Speaker 1: Calm down. I'm gonna get I'm gonna eat it, and
Speaker 1: I got it. Don't worry. Everything's gonna be okay. I
Speaker 1: don't know, a little nervous about it. I'll burn the
Speaker 1: hell out of it. I'll take a picture and send
Speaker 1: it to you and say, hey, look at this. Put
Speaker 1: it right next to the tire in my car. Can
Speaker 1: you tell a difference? Straight? Shard? Yeah, shpright moved. Going on,
Speaker 1: here's a more of a history question on pop quiz
Speaker 1: President Benjamin Harrison. President ben was so fond of eating
Speaker 1: this food that his parents, when he was growing up,
Speaker 1: wrote him a letter and he got a little older
Speaker 1: telling him to lay off the stuff. What was it jello? No,
Speaker 1: that would have been cool, And it was jello around
Speaker 1: when Benjamin Harrison was doing his thing. Cucumbers. Oh guy,
Speaker 1: I loved cucumbers a little odd. It's very light, it's
Speaker 1: not filling, it's kind of refreshing. Alright. This next one
Speaker 1: I think is bullshit. But the average woman will do
Speaker 1: this around twelve times a day. Look in the mirror.
Speaker 1: That's more than that. No, it's apply chapstick. Oh ship,
Speaker 1: that seems like an awful lot. Doesn't that seem like
Speaker 1: too much? Does live gloss count? I don't know. I
Speaker 1: don't know what they counted there, all right, Uh, twenty
Speaker 1: percent of fathers embarrassed their kids when they do this.
Speaker 1: What is kiss him? That's very Tom Brady of you know,
Speaker 1: it's actually when they scream and shout at like a
Speaker 1: little league basketball or soccer soccer parents. Yeah like that.
Speaker 1: Kids are embarrassed by that. I think you're probably higher
Speaker 1: than that of us. Plan on doing this over the summer.
Speaker 1: What is it going to the beach? Not going to
Speaker 1: drive in movie theaters? I think that's wrong too, because
Speaker 1: there's not enough driving movie theaters for that. The math
Speaker 1: on that to work out. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: Is there any drive in movie theaters where you live?
Speaker 1: And I think there If I go out a little
Speaker 1: further from here, go a little further east, I think
Speaker 1: there is, but not nothing. I off the top of
Speaker 1: my head that I there's an old drive in theater
Speaker 1: not far from here. That is, they have the sign
Speaker 1: up it's his drive in theater, but it's parking lot.
Speaker 1: It's not an actual driving movie theater anymore. Now. They
Speaker 1: used to have one in Carson, Carson, California. But yeah,
Speaker 1: nobody wants to hang out at a drive in movie
Speaker 1: theater in the city of Carson, like Carson Wilmington get
Speaker 1: a little shady, especially at nighttime, very west of the
Speaker 1: four or five of you to have that mindset. A
Speaker 1: recent survey says almost all Americans have this in our homes,
Speaker 1: but less than half of us actually use it. Um
Speaker 1: an alarm clock? You think you think alarm clock is
Speaker 1: the is the answer on that? Yeah, because people have
Speaker 1: cell phones now so you can set your alarm clock
Speaker 1: in your cell phone nowadays. Well I guess not now
Speaker 1: that you bring that up. But yeah, by the way,
Speaker 1: I guess you gotta full disclosure here. I uh failed
Speaker 1: the right down the answer. That's the professional ties for
Speaker 1: next week. So so I'm gonna have to try to
Speaker 1: find uh. Great. And I did this when I was
Speaker 1: half asleep, and uh, I knew eventually I get burned.
Speaker 1: Bad job by me. I knew. I knew eventually I
Speaker 1: would get burned. And I have just been burned. I
Speaker 1: have just been exposed. I have now been exposed. Wow,
Speaker 1: that's good. I'm trying to we'll try to get the answer,
Speaker 1: all right, A moving on here around forty of us
Speaker 1: would love to change this about ourselves. Mm hmm. I
Speaker 1: wouldn't say past um, how about her eyes? No, this
Speaker 1: is something that we both would relate to our voice.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, who the hell likes the voice? You know? Who?
Speaker 1: Who likes you? Right? You know what I'm saying? I mean,
Speaker 1: come on, yeah. But you're lucky though, like you lost
Speaker 1: a ship little weight, so your voice improved. I don't
Speaker 1: know if that's true or not. Yes, I don't believe
Speaker 1: that your voice is changed drastically from back in the day.
Speaker 1: That's because I was started out before certain things that
Speaker 1: dropped in my body, and so I had that issue. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but you're you don't think that you're weight corresponding with
Speaker 1: you changing the way that you sound. I don't. I
Speaker 1: think you sounded before like nasally and pinched, and now
Speaker 1: you just you got the deep piping voice, the voice
Speaker 1: of God, the voice of Yeah. I don't think you
Speaker 1: could when you were twenty five years old. Could you
Speaker 1: manipulate your voice like that. I don't think so. No,
Speaker 1: But you live and learn, right, life experience and all that.
Speaker 1: You gotta go. You gotta do it. Yeah, but you
Speaker 1: didn't have that range. Now you have the range. Yeah,
Speaker 1: one of the things I'm proud of. We don't play
Speaker 1: it anymore because I guess Roberto forgot. But I did
Speaker 1: a John Facinda like a parodied NFL films. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: all right, and I did this whole I think I
Speaker 1: sang the Raider theme song, you know, and it was
Speaker 1: I was very proud of it actually sounded much better
Speaker 1: than I That's one of the few things I actually liked.
Speaker 1: I usually think I sound terrible. But anyway, all right,
Speaker 1: A billions of these are I have the answer for
Speaker 1: this one. By the way, billions of these are used
Speaker 1: every year. Almost no one actually ends up buying these though.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, um, I don't know that's they're used,
Speaker 1: but no one ends up buying them. Yeah. An toothpicks.
Speaker 1: That's not a bad, bad guess. I actually I buy
Speaker 1: boogie toothpicks. I buy plastic toothpicks with the pick on
Speaker 1: the back and the whole thing. I love it well.
Speaker 1: With the dental Yeah, pay. They don't give those out
Speaker 1: for free. You gotta pay for those freaking things. Uh no,
Speaker 1: it's this is actually interesting. Uh it was wire hangers.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you know you can get exactly give the
Speaker 1: wire hangers it. They're paying for him, but you're not
Speaker 1: paying for him. One third of Americans had to make
Speaker 1: this lifestyle change when they had kids. What is it? Uh?
Speaker 1: Socializing kind of it's related. It's in that family. I
Speaker 1: get rid of irresponsible friends. Yeah, you know that shady
Speaker 1: friend that would be like, Hey, it's Saturday night, let's
Speaker 1: go do a line of coke. I gotta get rid
Speaker 1: of that person, right, or let's go, uh you know,
Speaker 1: go stoop around somewhere with some some random folks there,
Speaker 1: and you don't you to give that up? I think
Speaker 1: you just put him in the bullpen right in case
Speaker 1: you need to frog a little bit. Uh, you know
Speaker 1: the one offs to get the jail and get out
Speaker 1: of jail free card for a night from your wife
Speaker 1: or your husband and then you can go. Does that
Speaker 1: actually happen? Yeah? Is that right? I mean I got
Speaker 1: I have a lot of friends that are married that
Speaker 1: will actually use me as an excuse to go go
Speaker 1: out and hang out. Um. So when anything ad happens
Speaker 1: to them or they're doing something a little inconspicuous, UM,
Speaker 1: I usually get the blame for it, and more often
Speaker 1: than not, I'm the innocent party of all that is involved.
Speaker 1: So you lead the person astray, and you did. I
Speaker 1: got you, I got you, well, promiscuous, nothing wrong with them,
Speaker 1: I understand. Look at you all right. New survey, let's see. Yeah,
Speaker 1: new survey says nearly of men believe this is the
Speaker 1: number one sign that is starting to become old and
Speaker 1: become like there. I think we used this last weekend, didn't.
Speaker 1: I think we just want it was that it was
Speaker 1: a gray hair. Uh No, it's becoming old, becoming like
Speaker 1: your father, that kind of thing. Um, it's it's when
Speaker 1: you start taking barbecuing seriously and start taking grilling seriously
Speaker 1: like your old man. We didn't use that one. We didn't.
Speaker 1: We didn't know, Okay, I thought we did. Be sure
Speaker 1: to catch live editions of The Ben Maller Show week
Speaker 1: days at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific. It all
Speaker 1: sounds the same after a while, all right. A new
Speaker 1: survey asked pet owners to name one question they want
Speaker 1: their animals to answer. The question was do you love me?
Speaker 1: Do you love me? Actually was the second most popular response.
Speaker 1: What was number one? So the second one was do
Speaker 1: you love me? What was the number one? What's my name? No?
Speaker 1: The response was the question was are you happy? Are
Speaker 1: you happy? Little doggie? Are you happy? I think we're
Speaker 1: good on that, right, Think we're good? Yea, Yeah, we
Speaker 1: have don't stick to sports? Do we have any special
Speaker 1: don't stick to sports stories of the week? Yeah. Did
Speaker 1: you ever read Joe Buck's book called lucky bastard. I
Speaker 1: did not know. I did not you know, Joe Buck,
Speaker 1: he's kind of like you in the terms of self
Speaker 1: deprecating and and he was extremely self deprecating in his book,
Speaker 1: but it talked about the ways that he got brought
Speaker 1: up through his dad Jack and and kind of you know,
Speaker 1: working his way into a broadcast pasting career. And I
Speaker 1: bring that up because of this is like back in
Speaker 1: his early twenties, late teens, early twenties, he talked about
Speaker 1: hair plug issues. Um a young British man has actually
Speaker 1: told the media now how he was left scarred. Um Ben.
Speaker 1: He went to Turkey and spent nearly hundred euro on
Speaker 1: hair transplant surgery and he's scarred from the front of
Speaker 1: his scalp in front of his head and he's got
Speaker 1: a bunch of patches and bald spots. Obviously this one
Speaker 1: do it justice here on a podcast. But the guy
Speaker 1: was just twenty six years old and he was worried
Speaker 1: about a thinning hairline and he went to Turkey. He
Speaker 1: didn't do this in the UK. He actually traveled the
Speaker 1: Turkey spent nearly hundred euro on hair transplant surgeries that
Speaker 1: lasted about six hours. For a few a handful of months,
Speaker 1: and now he's left permanently scarred. It is almost like
Speaker 1: the version of Mike Tyson's tattoo on the side of
Speaker 1: his face, except it's all red and it looks like
Speaker 1: he's got some kind of of illness and it's alright.
Speaker 1: So the lesson is, Uh, if you're thinning like I am,
Speaker 1: and you're losing a little bit there up top, just
Speaker 1: better off let it go and going down this highway. Yes,
Speaker 1: you just gotta you gotta let it breathe. You just gotta,
Speaker 1: you know, let it go home. Yeah, if you will. Um,
Speaker 1: how about this production wise you mentioned it with with
Speaker 1: Mike North and his project that he's working on, Um,
Speaker 1: the CBS soap opera show called The Bold and the Beautiful.
Speaker 1: When they get back to full production, Ben, they're gonna
Speaker 1: start using female blow up dolls and actors for significant
Speaker 1: others when they're in these love making scenes. Moving forward. Oh,
Speaker 1: we have some experience in that, spear. Yeah, some tips
Speaker 1: you have to blow up dolls and all that. No,
Speaker 1: and just you know, make sure they're in place and
Speaker 1: they act accordingly, act right. And uh, of all your listeners,
Speaker 1: who do you think there's different years. I learned this
Speaker 1: from that Korean baseball thing. That there's the sex doll
Speaker 1: businesses apparently evolved here it's mushroom and there's like they're
Speaker 1: anatomically correct curvaceous blow up dolls. Are they going to
Speaker 1: use those kinds or the old school ones? Yeah? I
Speaker 1: know they're gonna use those. It matches the personality and
Speaker 1: matches the scene. So are they actually gonna be having
Speaker 1: um fun with the doll the actor? Will the actual
Speaker 1: actor be participating in certain activities with the blow up
Speaker 1: to a certain degree, Yes, yes they will. For the authenticity, right,
Speaker 1: The authenticity is that how it's for the artist. It's
Speaker 1: to be one with the blow up doll? That right?
Speaker 1: Could you imagine that? Could you imagine being the director? Cut?
Speaker 1: I need more from you? Can we get an air tank?
Speaker 1: The dolls get a little low there? Can we get
Speaker 1: an air tank? We got blown the doll up blowing up?
Speaker 1: Come on? Yeah? Exactly? Be sure to live editions the
Speaker 1: Ben Maller Show weekdays at two am Eastern Pacific. Ben,
Speaker 1: here's another one. Pamela Anderson's ex boyfriend, which one one
Speaker 1: of them? Um? He was a Ukrainian soccer player he
Speaker 1: won on YouTube and talked about in his relationship with
Speaker 1: with Pamela Anderson, and they said that certain nights they
Speaker 1: would they would have sex twelve times a night and
Speaker 1: it was so much that the people in France flew
Speaker 1: back at him and said, that's the reason why he
Speaker 1: sucked at soccer. That's a reasonable conclusion. I am not.
Speaker 1: It seems a little much. Everything in moderation, it seems
Speaker 1: at odd. Yes, yeah, I've I mean they say not
Speaker 1: to have sex the night before a game or a fight. Um,
Speaker 1: how much? What's the most sex you've had in a
Speaker 1: single day with the mrs. I don't. I don't. I
Speaker 1: don't keep tracking that don't like, I don't like check
Speaker 1: marks and stuff, so I don't. I don't really know.
Speaker 1: It was a few times. I don't know the number
Speaker 1: is why. I'm just curious. And yeah, did you see
Speaker 1: that story from the The Onion predicting reality? This in
Speaker 1: your list? So so the The the Onion tweeted this
Speaker 1: is like earlier this week, they tweeted a satirical story,
Speaker 1: a satire story about antire Mima's removal Simpsons, Right, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: they were like, you know, it's a satirical online newspaper
Speaker 1: The Onion, and they they tweeted out about the removal
Speaker 1: of the breast the breakfast mascot Anti Mima, and then
Speaker 1: hours later it was announced that they were removing the
Speaker 1: product after a hundred and thirty one years Quaker Oats
Speaker 1: and that her presence and grocery stores is coming to
Speaker 1: an end. It's over The Onion. You like. Do you
Speaker 1: like those website? You're a fan of the satirical websites.
Speaker 1: You get out they're great for comedy, like they are
Speaker 1: because you they're so far out there that you never
Speaker 1: think this ship is real. And it's pretty much like
Speaker 1: the Simpsons ten twenty years ago. They'll have you know,
Speaker 1: the cartoon The Simpsons come out with a new episode
Speaker 1: and then bang you fast forward to now last year,
Speaker 1: a couple of years before, and ship comes true. It's well,
Speaker 1: you're more of a Babylon be guy. You like that
Speaker 1: blond b is good? The Onion one the other day,
Speaker 1: it was pretty funny, maybe you laugh, one of those
Speaker 1: satirical ones. Yeah, I forget what it was. I think
Speaker 1: it hadn't do about that ballpark food that remember, No,
Speaker 1: you know, I think it was Oh, cracker Jack's. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a ballpark. Yeah, why they changed it? I think
Speaker 1: what they had on the articles that said that they
Speaker 1: changed the name from cracker Jack's to white Cracker or
Speaker 1: something of that nature, it was Caucasian Caucasian Jack. I
Speaker 1: think it was with Yeah, Caucasian JACKI Caucasian cracker Jack
Speaker 1: changed his name to politically correct Caucasi and Jack. Was
Speaker 1: that cracker barrel gonna go? Is they are they on
Speaker 1: the list? Are they gonna be changing their name or
Speaker 1: that's that's allowed. That's a good question because you think
Speaker 1: about what's going on in today's landscape. And I know
Speaker 1: un l V took away Hey reb for the Running
Speaker 1: Rebels um Long Beach State a few years ago and
Speaker 1: got rid of their mascot um is San Diego State, Florida,
Speaker 1: Florida get rid of some chant they were doing that.
Speaker 1: No one even knew what, you know, they just did it,
Speaker 1: and we're banning the chant from Florida Gator again. The
Speaker 1: San Diego State do the same thing with the Aztecs. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they changed it. They changed their mascot. I mean not
Speaker 1: they obviously have the Aztecs. They're still the Aztecs, but
Speaker 1: they changed the appearance of said mascot a couple of
Speaker 1: years ago. I think they're still trying to get rid
Speaker 1: of that. I think there's still groups trying to get
Speaker 1: rid of that all together. Yeah, so wild times, my
Speaker 1: own man. Anything else do we have? You don't stick
Speaker 1: to sport? That's that is it for? What about the
Speaker 1: monkey story? You didn't use them monkey story. It's a
Speaker 1: bad job by you. Monkey story. Fox Sports Radio has
Speaker 1: the best sports talk lineup in the nation. Catch all
Speaker 1: of our shows at Fox sports Radio dot com and
Speaker 1: within the I Heart Radio app search f s R
Speaker 1: to listen live. You know, I try to send you stuff.
Speaker 1: You don't even look at the stuff I said. Let's
Speaker 1: go to India where a monkey killed one and left
Speaker 1: two hundred fifty injured in a search for booze, and
Speaker 1: the monkey has been sentenced to serve his life in captivity.
Speaker 1: A monkey named khalua Uh. He has been over two
Speaker 1: hundred fifty people and apparently one of these people died.
Speaker 1: And imagine first of all, getting to the around two
Speaker 1: or over two dred people and not just euthanizing said monkey.
Speaker 1: Now in defense of the monkey, there's one way to
Speaker 1: get out of this the monkey can say and claim
Speaker 1: that he, she or whatever it is, that it has
Speaker 1: coronavirus or it's fearful of the coronavirus, and then it
Speaker 1: will be released at least in New York current California,
Speaker 1: and will be allowed to run the streets freely without
Speaker 1: any repercussions at all. Kalua the monkey, the pet monkey
Speaker 1: of a local UH local doctor would regularly be given
Speaker 1: liquor to drink, but over a period of time the
Speaker 1: monkey became alcoholic, and when the owner died, Kalua stopped
Speaker 1: getting wicker and became aggressive and aggravated and went on
Speaker 1: a biting spree and created terror in this part of
Speaker 1: India and Uh and then they had to call in
Speaker 1: the people from the zoo to catch the monkey and
Speaker 1: calm the monkey down. That that kind of reminds me.
Speaker 1: Did you ever see that movie with um Uh Cuba
Speaker 1: Gooding Jr. Renee Russo was in it. Kevin Space was
Speaker 1: actually called Outbreak. I did not well Outbrank. I didn't
Speaker 1: see a lot of movies. Guests, you keep giving movie references,
Speaker 1: and then my movie I was going to games. You
Speaker 1: were watching movies. I was going to games. I mean,
Speaker 1: you can do both sporting Whatno, you can't. You can'
Speaker 1: are at night movies at night? Can't do it? All right? Well,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I object, especially nowadays, I do recommend
Speaker 1: you watch Billions. Most of your staff, at least some
Speaker 1: of your staff watches Billions. I watched Billions. It's a
Speaker 1: really good show on Showtime. Um. But yeah, there was
Speaker 1: a movie. There's that movie. Basically there's a monkey that
Speaker 1: attacks people and gives us virus that spreads to towns,
Speaker 1: and they want to bomb it because the monkeys obviously dangerous.
Speaker 1: But never mind, you don't watch movies. Wow, it's fine.
Speaker 1: Genuinely hurt by that. Yeah, I mean like therapy dog.
Speaker 1: Would you like a little therapy dog? No, I'd like
Speaker 1: to converse with You've got things that you know other
Speaker 1: people have done or do do so, but that's what
Speaker 1: we do here. It's all we do. I'm thankful that
Speaker 1: I don't have to worry about you watching The Wire
Speaker 1: or True Detective be because apparently, in like cop shows
Speaker 1: and movies are now being taken off the air waves.
Speaker 1: So that's fine. I think you know, I'll get in
Speaker 1: trouble because I support the police. You think I give
Speaker 1: a danger that I could be canceled because I support
Speaker 1: law enforcement. You don't think that that's a civilized country
Speaker 1: should spend money on law enforcement, because I've seen what
Speaker 1: happens when they don't spend money on law enforcement, and
Speaker 1: it's not very good. That's a good question. I asked
Speaker 1: Cris Brustard and Rob Parker arlier this week on the
Speaker 1: Odd Couple, I said during a trending report, I asked him.
Speaker 1: I said, Hey, I wear a workout clothes that are
Speaker 1: just chilling rags, but I have an old school l
Speaker 1: A p D shirt. Would I be canceled if I
Speaker 1: go on social media wearing that shirt? You know, I'll
Speaker 1: my Gundhi. Yeah, yeah, it's it's wild. How can you
Speaker 1: support the police? How can you not like, don't don't worry.
Speaker 1: We'll have people they get ostracized on the fourth of
Speaker 1: July for rocking the Red, white and blue. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: that's that's scary. That's on deck patriotic. You have that
Speaker 1: to look forward to. So there's nothing to celebrate. Americans
Speaker 1: a terrible country, X Y and Z. Shame on you.
Speaker 1: You we will celebrating Americans, no national pride Alright, anyway,
Speaker 1: let's get to the mail bag. We don't have I
Speaker 1: want to go quick here, so guestcon just like a
Speaker 1: quick one sentence for each of us and then we'll
Speaker 1: move on to the next so we can get a
Speaker 1: lot of these emails the mail bag from Facebook. Again
Speaker 1: on Facebook, it's Ben Maller Show on Facebook and Mikey
Speaker 1: in St. Paul, Minnesota rights and he says, why don't
Speaker 1: more folks finish college? In my case, it was too
Speaker 1: many semesters of female anatomy. Yes, That's when Mikey said, uh, well,
Speaker 1: that's an interesting question, Mikey. I the reason I did
Speaker 1: not finish colleges because I went to school at saddle
Speaker 1: Back and I was studying, and I was like, I
Speaker 1: was planning on I think it was gonna be like
Speaker 1: cal State Fullerton was my initial plan because they had
Speaker 1: a decent media program. And I interned at the radio
Speaker 1: station in San Diego and they offered me a job,
Speaker 1: and so I was at a fork in the road.
Speaker 1: My dream was to work in radio. I had now
Speaker 1: been offered a paid position in radio as a reporter
Speaker 1: in you know, San Diego and in l A and
Speaker 1: the cover of sports and all that. So I was like, well,
Speaker 1: what am I What more am I gonna gain from
Speaker 1: studying about radio rather than just actually doing radio? And
Speaker 1: I believe I made the right call. Radio is one
Speaker 1: of those jobs like I want my doctor to be
Speaker 1: overly educated. I want my lawyer to know everything about law.
Speaker 1: I don't need my DJ to be overly educated. So
Speaker 1: I think that's the right cad. But that that was
Speaker 1: with me, and I guess got of course, but seventeen
Speaker 1: years going to college get his diploma right, Hey, I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna lie. It was hard for me to get
Speaker 1: out of undergrad. I went from a junior college and
Speaker 1: Torrance L. Cammuno playing ball there to San Diego State
Speaker 1: and I had a g p A that rivaled Clayton
Speaker 1: Kershaw's regular season e r A. Like that's how bad
Speaker 1: my g p A was because of working, making money
Speaker 1: and then parting my ass off at San Diego State. Um, yeah,
Speaker 1: I was pulled in multiple directions, not until the light
Speaker 1: went on and went to grad school that I had
Speaker 1: a g p A of Clayton Kershaw's postseason e r A.
Speaker 1: So things turned around. But yeah, it's it's not easy,
Speaker 1: especially because you're like you said, there's all kinds of
Speaker 1: things you can get into, especially crew wise, that why
Speaker 1: do you need the education if you can get in somehow,
Speaker 1: some way and then elevate denlo Ode, Jeremy writes, and
Speaker 1: he says, Ben, what would it take for you to
Speaker 1: fire or cancel someone for having a different political opinion? Uh? Yeah,
Speaker 1: in terms of politics, Jeremy, I really don't. I mean,
Speaker 1: it annoys me, you know, but I don't really care.
Speaker 1: I mean, I like, I've told the story many times,
Speaker 1: but growing up in the Mallard Mansion, the original Mallard Mansion,
Speaker 1: my dad conservative, my mom liberal, and we would have dinner,
Speaker 1: eat mac and cheese and salmon patties, and they would
Speaker 1: fight about whatever was going on in the world at
Speaker 1: the time, and then at the end they hu hug
Speaker 1: it out. We'd go watch TV, uh, some game show
Speaker 1: or something on TV or some some TV miniseries and
Speaker 1: then that was it. And so uh and I I
Speaker 1: don't agree with a lot of you know, obviously, I'm
Speaker 1: like anybody else. I have my thoughts on the world
Speaker 1: and my beliefs on what I think politically is right
Speaker 1: and what should happen. But I don't really give a
Speaker 1: funk if somebody else has a different opinion. It's fine.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't I don't really care. Now. It
Speaker 1: annoys me when they think that they they are holier
Speaker 1: than now and that there's somehow that they're moral compass
Speaker 1: is better than than mine. That that you know, they
Speaker 1: serve a slap across the face for that. But but
Speaker 1: other than that, it's like, I don't really care. You
Speaker 1: can think whatever you want doesn't really matter to me. Um,
Speaker 1: And you know, we're not really doing politics that much
Speaker 1: on the show. So let's see anything on that guest count.
Speaker 1: Are you good on that? I wasn't asked? Okay, Tammy?
Speaker 1: Tammy in Montana. Ben, you keep saying, as you introduced
Speaker 1: David for better or worse? So those are part of
Speaker 1: marriage vows. Would David be the marrying kind of guy? Interesting?
Speaker 1: Interesting that Tammy would ask this question that guess it's fascinating.
Speaker 1: Uh guess guns at the point. Now, see, I I
Speaker 1: waited a long time until I got married. How will
Speaker 1: you guess? You got a birthday coming up? Right? You
Speaker 1: and O J share the same birthday, Tom Tom Hanks
Speaker 1: yea on July nine. O J. July nights and you're
Speaker 1: gonna be fifty years old. So usually if you don't
Speaker 1: get married by the time you turn fifty, boy, that's
Speaker 1: not gonna happen. So I would say, since he's about
Speaker 1: to turn fifty, Tammy, I think he's not getting married. No,
Speaker 1: I don't think it's gonna happen. Do you think a
Speaker 1: marriage material? I think that's what she was asking. H
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think you know you want that.
Speaker 1: Oh you want the ball and chain. You don't want
Speaker 1: that in your life, right? You know you like being
Speaker 1: the swinging bachelor guy. You like it? Yeah, the swinging
Speaker 1: bachelor during a pandemic. This shall pass, This shall pass. Now,
Speaker 1: do you have a lot of women, guess Scott. I
Speaker 1: hear this from from women that they have a date
Speaker 1: in their head. You know, one of the problems we
Speaker 1: all have, some one of the little kids we have.
Speaker 1: I gotta, I gotta do this by this age. And
Speaker 1: I get it for women because the biological clock and
Speaker 1: all that, and you think you think you gotta get
Speaker 1: certain stuff done. But my counter arguments, I think now,
Speaker 1: because of technology, it pushed, it has pushed stuff back.
Speaker 1: You don't necessarily have to do things as only. But
Speaker 1: the other thing is that I remember reading a book
Speaker 1: about this. The biggest problem, one of the biggest problems
Speaker 1: with women is they read these fairy tales and they're
Speaker 1: taught from their parents and their peers that this is
Speaker 1: gonna be your Life's gonna be like Cinderella. You know,
Speaker 1: in this bullshit. That's not how the real world works.
Speaker 1: But if you have a date in your head, yes,
Speaker 1: and by the time I get to this age, I've
Speaker 1: gotta have like I gotta have a wife, I gotta
Speaker 1: have a family. If you want to go down that road,
Speaker 1: if you do, you think about that. I thought in
Speaker 1: my twenties, I thought that if if if I wasn't
Speaker 1: married or at least established by thirty, then there was
Speaker 1: something wrong with me. And then I flipped to thirty
Speaker 1: and I'm like, wait a minute, I'm still trying to
Speaker 1: figure out who I am, let alone, who I'm dating.
Speaker 1: And I thought, professionally, and if I wasn't where I
Speaker 1: was at by the time I hit forty, I was
Speaker 1: in deep ship. And you need to pivot, so not
Speaker 1: marriage wise, but professionally wise, because you don't want to
Speaker 1: live grinding your entire fucking life right like you want
Speaker 1: to make sure that you can enjoy the fruits of
Speaker 1: your labor. We I mean, we work in a profession.
Speaker 1: We're holidays, we don't get off or not more often not,
Speaker 1: we don't get off. We're working weekends, we're working nights,
Speaker 1: and so some of the stuff that regular people like
Speaker 1: enjoy vacations and holidays and get togethers and whatnot, we
Speaker 1: don't see a lot of. Like you have an understanding wife,
Speaker 1: which is drastically different. But you know, like in the
Speaker 1: dating scene, when you tell someone you work in radio
Speaker 1: or television, they think it's a rad job. And then
Speaker 1: all of a sudden when you can't go out with
Speaker 1: them because your work schedules three to eleven or four
Speaker 1: to twelve, and they're like, well, I'm gonna go date
Speaker 1: somebody else. Yeah, Like my my, I never thought about
Speaker 1: any I never believe I would ever get married. I
Speaker 1: never thought I would have any of that. Um, just
Speaker 1: because I just was like locked in like laser focus, right,
Speaker 1: like the cliche of American society, the fabric of American society.
Speaker 1: I just put my head down and I worked, and
Speaker 1: I said, I'm gonna make it. It's gonna it's gonna happen.
Speaker 1: As far as my career is concerned, but yeah, if
Speaker 1: I stopped it, and I did, like almost ten years
Speaker 1: a weekend overnights, and I was like, what the funk
Speaker 1: They wouldn't give me a shot, And then they gave
Speaker 1: me a shot. I had the overnight show during the
Speaker 1: week and then I got I got pole loxed in
Speaker 1: a company wide blood bath. And you know, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'd worked my entire life up to that point to
Speaker 1: get the show that I wanted. I had the show
Speaker 1: that I wanted, and then I get whacked and I'm
Speaker 1: out of work for almost seven months, six months and
Speaker 1: twenty six days. Uh was that? But I just keep
Speaker 1: just keep going. He's like, you know, the journey of
Speaker 1: a thousand miles starts with one step, right, that old
Speaker 1: hokey thing. Yeah, dog and Fort Collins. Right. So he says,
Speaker 1: I'm wondering if you have talked to your friend of
Speaker 1: the show, Russef lately, and if you have any insight
Speaker 1: on where he might wrestle next. Hopefully it's a e
Speaker 1: w uh that is from dog, well Dog, that is
Speaker 1: a private conversation. I did exchange messages with Russef briefly
Speaker 1: a few weeks ago. We talked about twitch and he's
Speaker 1: doing some stuff on Twitch right now during the day,
Speaker 1: kind of connecting with his big fans from from wrestling
Speaker 1: and whatnot, that that he's on there, and he was
Speaker 1: he was telling me about how, you know, hey, where's
Speaker 1: him out? You know, having to be on there for
Speaker 1: for hours and he was he was asking me, uh,
Speaker 1: we we were talking about being in radio and having
Speaker 1: to talk for four hours a night and that skill set.
Speaker 1: So that was was cool. But he did not specifically
Speaker 1: say anything. But I have heard from let's just say
Speaker 1: a little birdie that there is something in the works
Speaker 1: there with russaf so he will be be back sooner
Speaker 1: than later. There's some contractual stuff that has to be
Speaker 1: worked out, but the payout and things like that. But anyway,
Speaker 1: Ethan and Acron rights and he says, other than saying
Speaker 1: something completely out of bounds on the radio, what would
Speaker 1: you most likely be canceled for? That's a good question, Ethan.
Speaker 1: The obvious one is social media, the mob, the cancel
Speaker 1: culture mob on social media with a very small group. Uh.
Speaker 1: That is that's the third rail. Right, If you say
Speaker 1: the wrong thing, if you say something that some snowflake,
Speaker 1: some piss aunt gets upset with and then they get
Speaker 1: the mob, the cyber mob that can lead to your
Speaker 1: your demise. Uh. I mean there's other things. Obviously, we
Speaker 1: have morals clauses in our contracts and things like that
Speaker 1: and so those type of things, but those are just
Speaker 1: boilerplate that everyone has in their contract. But I guess
Speaker 1: the big one would be a social media we have.
Speaker 1: I was trying to a buddy of mine that does
Speaker 1: a morning show, and we were commenting that it's an
Speaker 1: amazing time now that we have more freedom now as
Speaker 1: broadcasters to give an opinion on the radio than on
Speaker 1: social media. It's wild, Like, but that's really the reality.
Speaker 1: It shouldn't be that way, I would think, But that's
Speaker 1: that's the way it is. What do you think that's
Speaker 1: a combination of of attention span and then also people
Speaker 1: just not digesting everything. I think it's the limit on Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like the limit on how many characters you have
Speaker 1: on Twitter. There's only a certain amount you can use
Speaker 1: on Twitter. And and like when I do a monologue,
Speaker 1: I try to be as thorough as I can and
Speaker 1: try to really back up I it's like I'm making
Speaker 1: I imagine the elevator. It's like an elevator right in
Speaker 1: my head. Like you're in an elevator in New York.
Speaker 1: You're going from the first floor to the seventy eight floor.
Speaker 1: You only have a limited amount of time to make
Speaker 1: your point. You have to make It's called an elevator pitch.
Speaker 1: So I'm trying to make my elevator pitch. When I
Speaker 1: try to try to back it up, I got on Twitter,
Speaker 1: you just throw something out, You're throwing bombs, and then
Speaker 1: you're moving on to the next and there's no context,
Speaker 1: there's no backstory, there's no none of that. So but
Speaker 1: I would say anything else, guess on that would get
Speaker 1: you canceled. I think social media is the big one.
Speaker 1: I think uh, I actually think either retaliation or retribution.
Speaker 1: And that's because you see a lot of things nowadays
Speaker 1: that edited videos or cut videos. Imagine if you have
Speaker 1: the mob or people trying to attack you and just
Speaker 1: at a sheer self defense physically, you're trying to defend
Speaker 1: yourself and return fire, no pun intendant, but you're trying
Speaker 1: to return fire. But people only see that portion of
Speaker 1: it as opposed to what happened prior. Then that goes
Speaker 1: viral and then all of a sudden bang, you're canceled. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean there's a lot of videos that go around.
Speaker 1: There's one this week I sent you actually, I think
Speaker 1: this morning, where it's edited. You can tell it's edited.
Speaker 1: What the people see is the edited part, and that's
Speaker 1: what they reacted because humans are dumb generally, and they
Speaker 1: whatever they think they get the whole story, and they
Speaker 1: react to that. With any of these and you think
Speaker 1: you're getting the whole story, there's a lot more to it.
Speaker 1: And there's usually three sides to every story, right, there's
Speaker 1: your side, there side, there's the truth truth with any
Speaker 1: of these things. I saw an amazing video earlier this
Speaker 1: week about UM on social media. Someone took a video
Speaker 1: of an individual driving a car through a protest, and
Speaker 1: all they had was the snapshot of when the person
Speaker 1: hit the gas and drove through this crowd and hit
Speaker 1: a bunch of people and then drove away. Well, someone
Speaker 1: else had had the actual, fur full version of the video,
Speaker 1: and it turned out it was a female in her
Speaker 1: car that was at a stop. People surrounded the car
Speaker 1: and in the back of the car was a little
Speaker 1: dog and someone broke into the car like smashed one
Speaker 1: of the wind does on the rear passenger side, and
Speaker 1: so out of fear for herself and the dog, she
Speaker 1: high tailed the funk out of there and she hit people. Well,
Speaker 1: the great thing, I mean, the blatant disregard for other
Speaker 1: human beings that that that people have. And and I like,
Speaker 1: how like you're supposed to let the thugs, the outlaws
Speaker 1: that are pillaging cities, that are doing things like that,
Speaker 1: You're supposed to let him go unchecked. And it's controversial.
Speaker 1: It has become controversial to push back against the villains
Speaker 1: of society, the card carrying slime balls that are amongst
Speaker 1: us that are not doing peaceful protest. They're burning and
Speaker 1: pillaging police stations and businesses. And it's like, oh, they
Speaker 1: have insurance these parasites, they haven't. Sure. I got a
Speaker 1: call from beer drinking Brian the other night on the
Speaker 1: radio show. He's got family in Minnesota, you know, mom
Speaker 1: and pop business, and got torched, burned up, pillaged during
Speaker 1: the unrest in Minnesota. Insurance isn't covering all of it.
Speaker 1: They're covering some of it, but not enough for a
Speaker 1: small mom and pop business. And yet these low lifes
Speaker 1: are getting away with it, and and and celebrities the
Speaker 1: celebrity cultures are endorsing the demon spawn that are amongst us.
Speaker 1: Ridiculous anyway, Sorry, I guess I gotta carried uh Jesse
Speaker 1: from Pomona Rights since I just finished last week's Fifth
Speaker 1: Hour and I heard a university apologize for allowing riot
Speaker 1: police to use the bathroom that's right in Boston. In Boston,
Speaker 1: Holy fuck, uh, he says, when the Lakers won and
Speaker 1: a riot broke out, You've been allowed a police officer
Speaker 1: to use your studio bathroom. My question is, will you
Speaker 1: be issuing a formable apology? Uh uh no, go pound
Speaker 1: sand with a rubber mallet, funk that. I ain't apologize.
Speaker 1: I'll let all the police use my take a whiz
Speaker 1: in my bathroom. I don't care. It's ridiculous. The war
Speaker 1: on police is so stupid, It's so dumb, and it
Speaker 1: is gonna backfire. And you know, you get what you
Speaker 1: asked for. You get what you asked for al right now,
Speaker 1: Hopefully it doesn't happen where I live, because I support
Speaker 1: the police, and I think the police are are generally great. Obviously,
Speaker 1: there's a few things that need to be touched up
Speaker 1: from time to time, but it's it's not what the
Speaker 1: legend that is out there. Do not believe the legend
Speaker 1: is the fact. It is the legend which gets printed,
Speaker 1: but not actually the facts. People don't like the facts
Speaker 1: because they don't line up with the legend. Uh. Fats
Speaker 1: in Philadelphia, right, So it says, Ben, if you and
Speaker 1: I were roomies, what would a Saturday during college football
Speaker 1: season entail? What would be on our agenda for the day? Well, Fats,
Speaker 1: that's a great question. You would be a wild roommate. Fats.
Speaker 1: You are man or man. I can only imagine living
Speaker 1: with Fats what that must be like. But my college
Speaker 1: football saturdays are very regimented. Unfortunately I live on the
Speaker 1: West Coast, so things start way too early. I am, yeah,
Speaker 1: and that really bothers me. Like I would want to
Speaker 1: be in Philadelphia, Fats, because then I could sleep into
Speaker 1: like eleven, and then wake up and take a shower
Speaker 1: or whatever watch games starting at noon. So for college football,
Speaker 1: it's better to be in Philadelphia than it is in
Speaker 1: in California. So normally I missed the first television window.
Speaker 1: I missed the nine am games because I'm sleeping, but
Speaker 1: I usually there's the three am Eastern noon Pacific College
Speaker 1: Football window. I love that, uh. And and so from
Speaker 1: from noon until the I'll watch up until like Hawaii,
Speaker 1: you know, like the Hawaii game that which is the
Speaker 1: very last game, which is like ten o'clock uh on
Speaker 1: the West coast, one o'clock on the morning on the
Speaker 1: East coast, and I'll watch that. But it involves a
Speaker 1: lot of gambling, a lot of gambling fats uh. And
Speaker 1: there's there's a consumption of food, um for for you.
Speaker 1: Of course, we would have a lot of alcohol. We
Speaker 1: were a lot of booze and it's a it's a
Speaker 1: great old time. So I think if I had to
Speaker 1: go through what a day of college football for you
Speaker 1: guys would be, like, I think it would be Breakfast
Speaker 1: would be leftover pizza cold of course, not warmed up
Speaker 1: from the microwave. And then I think pizza. I think
Speaker 1: middle of the day would be casadillas and chips made
Speaker 1: a little salsa. Beer would start during that time, and
Speaker 1: I think link liquor would get into the afternoon evening
Speaker 1: time and that's when you guys would do like hot
Speaker 1: dogs and hamburgers or like maybe like ribs, or you
Speaker 1: just order a new pizza and then have that carry
Speaker 1: over until the next day too. Yeah, the place would
Speaker 1: smell like ass. Well, according to Doc, Mike, that's a
Speaker 1: good thing. I guess that's what Doc told me. It's
Speaker 1: a good thing. He said that. Yeah, all right, thank you. Fats.
Speaker 1: Clayton writes in and says, did you ever come up
Speaker 1: with the best way to wash or clean a hat ball? Well, Clayton,
Speaker 1: I think we touched on this a while ago. I
Speaker 1: had I did purchase this. They're they're readily available on
Speaker 1: the internet. Its costs like ten bucks. It is a
Speaker 1: plastic hat holder. It's kind of like the shell of
Speaker 1: the hat. You put the hat in there, and then
Speaker 1: you can wash it in your dishwasher or you can
Speaker 1: wash it in your washing machine, and there's instructions on
Speaker 1: how to do it. I have done it, and if
Speaker 1: you have a really sweaty, nasty hat, it makes it better.
Speaker 1: But it's never gonna be as good as new. I
Speaker 1: have not figured out a way to make it as
Speaker 1: good as new. And if somebody does know, you want
Speaker 1: to email me and let me know. Real Fifth Hour
Speaker 1: at gmail dot com or Ben Maller Show at gmail
Speaker 1: dot com, either one of those of work. But I
Speaker 1: have done it i've done the dishwasher thing. I didn't
Speaker 1: notice though that it kind of left some of that, like, uh,
Speaker 1: stuff from the hat was in the dishwasher once I
Speaker 1: was done with the dishwasher, so that became problematic. Uh
Speaker 1: So I guess I would recommend the washing machine. But
Speaker 1: you gotta have like a a front loading washing machine,
Speaker 1: or you can't have like an over the top or
Speaker 1: there's like all these different rules and stuff. So but yeah,
Speaker 1: I have a big hat collection, and these things are
Speaker 1: fucking pieces of art. These hats are like thirty bucks,
Speaker 1: forty bucks. A lot of these things now at retail value,
Speaker 1: So you want to keep them as nice as that
Speaker 1: you can possibly keep them, because it's it's an ex
Speaker 1: spensive habit when you wear a lot of hats. There.
Speaker 1: So guess if you figured out a way to clean hats. No,
Speaker 1: I never. I mean if so, once I wear a
Speaker 1: hat and I decided to wear it while I'm working out,
Speaker 1: then I know I'm discarding that hat because I get
Speaker 1: the sweat logs in the hat and then it just
Speaker 1: looks like ship and then you'll never return back to form.
Speaker 1: So I hasn't I have a I have a workout hat. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I have a workout hat that has purposely designed to
Speaker 1: just sweat. It's it's disgusting, but that's my workout. When
Speaker 1: I played that the Company golf outing last year, I
Speaker 1: wore my my sweaty hat because I knew I was
Speaker 1: gonna sweat like a pig. A pig in Georgia and
Speaker 1: I did. You were sweating in December and Newport Beach
Speaker 1: it was actually like June or something like, you know
Speaker 1: it was it was August. It was hot, was it? Oh? Man,
Speaker 1: it was warm. It was like bliss. It's hotter where
Speaker 1: I lived than there. But you know it's fine. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Jason and Rocky Mound Virginia rights and he says, for
Speaker 1: both of you guys, if you could go back in
Speaker 1: time to attend one past sporting event, what would it
Speaker 1: be and why? Yeah, I mean, Jason, that's a generic question,
Speaker 1: which I like it. It's it's a question question designed
Speaker 1: to bring up conversation. I guess the one that there's
Speaker 1: two answers, I'll give number one. It would be watching
Speaker 1: Babe Ruth in his prime for the Yankees. Does the
Speaker 1: legend of Babe Ruth live up to the reality of
Speaker 1: watching him on a lazy Saturday afternoon at Yankee Stadium
Speaker 1: against the Red Sox hitting bombs? Is it as good
Speaker 1: as it has been written? The legend of Babe Ruth
Speaker 1: to see him when he was young and spry and
Speaker 1: hitting home runs? And then the other one is a
Speaker 1: more recent one. I've heard so many stories about Will
Speaker 1: Chamberlain and how amazing he was. Wouldn't it be something
Speaker 1: to be in Hershey, Pennsylvania and watch a hundred point
Speaker 1: game and see what what that was like? There's no
Speaker 1: real video of it, right and all that. So those
Speaker 1: are the two. What about you, Guessica? Um? I was
Speaker 1: thinking about this as as you mentioned it, and I
Speaker 1: go back to when my dad because I think my
Speaker 1: dad's favorite athlete of all time is Sandy Kofax and
Speaker 1: uh the nineteen sixty five World Series when the Dodgers
Speaker 1: beat the Twins. My dad was telling me a tale
Speaker 1: about how co Fax pitch Game seven on two days rest.
Speaker 1: And I believe from what he said I could be
Speaker 1: completely on based on this, but I guess apparently he
Speaker 1: had gone to to um. Uh, he had gone to
Speaker 1: the manager and discuss things, Walter Austin, and he said like, hey,
Speaker 1: if you want to win this game. Give the ball
Speaker 1: to the jew and apparently he co Fax had nothing
Speaker 1: but a fastball that day and blew away the Minnesota
Speaker 1: Twins with one fucking pitch. And so I baseball is
Speaker 1: is one of my first loves. But I would have
Speaker 1: loved like you said, like I would have loved to
Speaker 1: see a guy like Babe Ruth. But I would have
Speaker 1: loved to see a guy like Sandy Kofax, because you know,
Speaker 1: in today's world, people people bathe the feet of Clayton
Speaker 1: Kershaw and they compare him to Kofax. But I have
Speaker 1: no idea why the regular season. Yeah, although the odd
Speaker 1: thing and I looked this up, I don't know if
Speaker 1: it's still the case. But the Dodgers did not have
Speaker 1: a great record in World Series game Sandy ko Fax
Speaker 1: started because they had such shitty off. Yeah, they had
Speaker 1: no run support, so fucking bad at swinging the bat.
Speaker 1: That didn't matter how good ko Fax was. People playoffs
Speaker 1: would tell most of those. Yeah, my dad would tell
Speaker 1: me stories. He'd say, people would say, hey, ko Fax
Speaker 1: pitched an awesome game, a two hitter, and then people
Speaker 1: would come back and say, yeah, but did they win.
Speaker 1: It's like, no, Nolan Ryan had I think one year
Speaker 1: with the Astros, he had like an e r A
Speaker 1: of like a little above two. I think about a
Speaker 1: lad baseball on the r A and he was like
Speaker 1: eight and sixteen because they couldn't score. They were so
Speaker 1: fucking bad they couldn't score. That's unbelievable. See October fourteenth,
Speaker 1: nineteen sixty five, Dodgers and Twins. Dodgers won that game
Speaker 1: to nothing, and Sandy co Fax pitched a three hit,
Speaker 1: complete game shutout on two days rest. So I mean
Speaker 1: he had ten strikeouts in that game. I'd love to
Speaker 1: see something like that. Just a guy that can fucking
Speaker 1: throw gas and get you out with one fucking pitch.
Speaker 1: Not Mariano Rivera for one inning, but I'm talking about
Speaker 1: twenty seven outs, all right. Gary from Vancouver Island Rights
Speaker 1: and he says, Ben, how do you feel about your
Speaker 1: favorite baseball player? Says that sarcastically having a change of heart,
Speaker 1: And he sent me a screenshot of Blake Snell, who
Speaker 1: joined the Baseball Union talking points and said tell us
Speaker 1: when and where he said on Twitter? Uh, yeah, I
Speaker 1: I was told that was obviously I didn't see it
Speaker 1: because Snell snells a snowflake and he blocked me and
Speaker 1: all that. So I didn't see it. Uh, but I'm not.
Speaker 1: I'm not surprised. Boy did that backfire though? How how
Speaker 1: bad did that marketing stretch? Whoever came up with that
Speaker 1: at the union should lose their job. Head should roll.
Speaker 1: You had every advantage Baseball Union, the union. Rob Manford
Speaker 1: looked like a complete donkey. And I don't need to
Speaker 1: rehash this. We talked about it during the week on
Speaker 1: the show. But it looked like a complete moron with
Speaker 1: the whole hundred percent thing and and all that and
Speaker 1: and how ridiculous and whatnot and changing his opinion. And
Speaker 1: then the players, they almost all of them, tweeted out
Speaker 1: on social media tell us when and where, and then
Speaker 1: Baseball told them when and where and the players said no,
Speaker 1: And uh, it's just absolutely wonderful. It's just just absolutely great.
Speaker 1: At the the the hypocrisy on both sides like and
Speaker 1: and people get upset because I'm on the owner's side
Speaker 1: and I am on the owner side. I can't support
Speaker 1: any any group that has Blake Snell. I just can't
Speaker 1: do it. I cannot do it. And I'm not afraid
Speaker 1: of rich people. There's a lot of shaming of the rich.
Speaker 1: I'm not I mean players are rich. Also the owners
Speaker 1: are wealthy. There's a different there. But yeah, Joe from
Speaker 1: New Jersey Rights, he says, do you think Mike Gundy
Speaker 1: should have said I'm a racist redneck man, I'm forty
Speaker 1: instead of I'm a man, I'm forty. Yeah, I saw
Speaker 1: that that. Now they're trying to paint Gundhi. They're like
Speaker 1: anyone that ever had a problem with Gundy, any player
Speaker 1: that he didn't treat perfectly. Is They're all like cockroach
Speaker 1: who's coming out of the woodwork to pile on Gundhy's
Speaker 1: the dog pilotechnique. That is why you should never apologize
Speaker 1: as a public figure. These people are coming out right.
Speaker 1: The apology is not good enough, or even if they
Speaker 1: think it's good enough, but you should still apologize for
Speaker 1: this and this, you know, stuff that was twenty thirty
Speaker 1: years ago you have to apologize for. And it's Pandora's box,
Speaker 1: is what it is. And I might pay I might
Speaker 1: be a cynic on this, Ben, but let me know
Speaker 1: if you agree. I think the response from Oklahoma State
Speaker 1: was not because they're supporting their athlete. I think it's
Speaker 1: because they were worried about their donors and and their
Speaker 1: alum that give back to the program. I think they
Speaker 1: were more afraid of losing out money from from people
Speaker 1: in the past as opposed to the conflict between Gundey
Speaker 1: and Hubbard. Yeah. But the thing about that story, which
Speaker 1: is like Truba Hubbard chose to go to a conservative
Speaker 1: Republican part of the country, still Water, Oklaholma, right down
Speaker 1: in the middle, yes, right with a coach that wears
Speaker 1: a mullet and is stunned to find out the coach
Speaker 1: would watch a right wing cable news channel and a
Speaker 1: private fishing trip wear a shirt with the logo on it.
Speaker 1: This is blasphemy. I mean, just again, I know common
Speaker 1: sense is not common, but really, I mean it's just
Speaker 1: these type of things. Tracy and Arkansas, right, So they
Speaker 1: will do a few more of these. We have a
Speaker 1: lot of questions this week. Thank you, Tracy and Arkansas
Speaker 1: says I he's scratch scratch off. He says, I would
Speaker 1: give anything to have you guys send me a picture,
Speaker 1: uh for my sports room, Like he wants an autographed picture,
Speaker 1: and he actually gave me his a He gave me
Speaker 1: his address in Jonesboro, Arkansas. Unfortunately, sir scratch Off, we
Speaker 1: have no marketing budget. I have. I've never even taken
Speaker 1: a photo. I think with guess maybe once or twice
Speaker 1: that's it. So but no, we could take a photo,
Speaker 1: I guess and blow it up, but that would be
Speaker 1: a lot of work. But Tracy really want that's a
Speaker 1: big fan there, guest Scott. Somebody wants to have your
Speaker 1: photo in their sports from that's an honor. That's kind
Speaker 1: of cool. We've taken some pictures in the studio, like
Speaker 1: there's one that you and I took with Danny and
Speaker 1: I think coop um. I have a had a picture
Speaker 1: like a workout shirt that I wore but said got
Speaker 1: Peyton and it was the year that Denver One they
Speaker 1: beat Um Caroline the super Bowl for super steroids. He
Speaker 1: just post steroids. And then we have one we have
Speaker 1: one with the entire crew that came up to Bakersfield.
Speaker 1: But I think that's something that's it. The one thing though,
Speaker 1: is that it would require you to actually get in
Speaker 1: your car and drive to the studio like that. That's
Speaker 1: not an easy seat, you know these days. For Ben Mallier, Well,
Speaker 1: let me tell you how radio works. Telling Steve Harvey
Speaker 1: does his show in his pajamas. Russia Baw does his
Speaker 1: show from his When you reach a certain status, when
Speaker 1: you reach a level in the business, broadcast from your home,
Speaker 1: or if there's a Global Apocalypse podcast from your either
Speaker 1: one of those two things, the outcome is the same.
Speaker 1: And I want you to know that I've upgraded. As
Speaker 1: we've talked about in previous episodes, guest on, the home
Speaker 1: studio is actually better than the actual studio. I have
Speaker 1: newer equipment in my studio in my house than we
Speaker 1: do when I go to work. So, uh, wrap your
Speaker 1: head around back. Now, silly? Is that? Now? Silly? Is that?
Speaker 1: What happens if your microphone stand starts to break or
Speaker 1: the batter behind you starts to lose a letter? What
Speaker 1: do you what do you mean you have to buy
Speaker 1: a new one or what are you gonna do? Because
Speaker 1: the Geico studios where we usually operate at was losing letters,
Speaker 1: where like I think it was a Fox Sports or yeah,
Speaker 1: the letter itself for Geico, it was losing the letters
Speaker 1: off of it, and the microphone stands would be falling
Speaker 1: and toppling on over yeah yeah, yeah, oh yeah, stuff
Speaker 1: was falling apart. Line one broke, then line they fixed,
Speaker 1: line one, then line two broke. My favorite was when
Speaker 1: you'd have to high step into the studio because of
Speaker 1: the trash. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well I always
Speaker 1: love because you know, God forbid, you pay for people
Speaker 1: to take the trash out seven days a week, and
Speaker 1: you don't value the people that are trash men and
Speaker 1: women until they don't pick up the trash, and suddenly
Speaker 1: they become the most important people in your world. And
Speaker 1: and in our place, we got a bunch of fucking
Speaker 1: animals that worked there, and and I, you know, I'm
Speaker 1: one of them. But on the weekends, you know, they're
Speaker 1: eating you know, fish and chicken and beef and all
Speaker 1: these different and they're not finishing, and so they're leaving
Speaker 1: like a half eaten piece of salmon or tuna, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, tuna salad in the trash, and it's piling up.
Speaker 1: And so I've come in there on Sunday night to
Speaker 1: do the overnight show and it's smells fucking horrible and
Speaker 1: it's disgusting. I don't miss that. I'll tell you that
Speaker 1: right now. I don't miss that. Fuck that. That was horrible.
Speaker 1: It's not funny It was fucking hilarious because like the
Speaker 1: only person I knew that it wasn't with two people,
Speaker 1: I knew it wasn't Steve Hartman, and I knew it
Speaker 1: wasn't Jonas knocks. Jonas only eats healthy stuff and and
Speaker 1: usually he's really well kept with his food. And Steve Hartman,
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't think he gets anything while he's
Speaker 1: in the studio. So it wasn't only two guys. I
Speaker 1: knew it wasn't them. Yeah, it's the whole anyway, A
Speaker 1: few more here, we have a little more times, a
Speaker 1: lot more time technically if we wanted to. Uh, Carlos
Speaker 1: and Houston says, since the internet, Ben says, you're worth
Speaker 1: three million dollars, when are you getting yourself a tesla?
Speaker 1: Like common coward? They're nice. Yeah, And I had an
Speaker 1: electric car. It turned out to be a lemon, so
Speaker 1: I had to get rid of it. And I got
Speaker 1: fucked on that too, because they didn't give me what
Speaker 1: it was actually worth. They marked it down from what
Speaker 1: I actually paid for it. But I'd love to get
Speaker 1: a tesla. I would, I would think it'd be great,
Speaker 1: but I can't afford it, so it's not gonna happen.
Speaker 1: I just I love the idea of not having to
Speaker 1: pay for gas. I love the idea of that because
Speaker 1: gas is cheap now because of the pandemic. But it's
Speaker 1: gonna go back up soon enough. John the Jailer Allen
Speaker 1: town p a right, since it's Ben and Gagon, which
Speaker 1: person will you miss more? Ante Mima or Uncle Ben?
Speaker 1: Guess which one are you gonna give him this more? Neither?
Speaker 1: I'm neither. I mean when you have didn't you didn't
Speaker 1: use Anthew Mima syrup or Uncle Ben's rice? Well, I
Speaker 1: guess in today's day and age, Ben, I've been awakened.
Speaker 1: Like Arnie Spanier, one of our great friends at Fox
Speaker 1: Sports Radio, he for Christmas sends the entire network um
Speaker 1: pancake mix along with maple syrup from Vermont, and it
Speaker 1: is fucking amazing. It is. It is orgasmic how good
Speaker 1: it is. Now. It's a little pricey, but it is
Speaker 1: definitely worth the costs. So you're saying it's better than
Speaker 1: highly processed Anshew Mima suru. Yes, what are you gonna
Speaker 1: call it? That'll be interesting, But let's answer your question,
Speaker 1: John the Jailer, Uncle Ben, you know I remember when
Speaker 1: I first became an uncle. You know, my my brother
Speaker 1: in New York had a daughter and I became uncle Ben.
Speaker 1: I became uncle Ben. I became the guy in the
Speaker 1: rice and all that stuff. And so I'm an uncle
Speaker 1: to several several nieces and nephews, and so it's it's
Speaker 1: pretty cool being an uncle. I like it's fun. But
Speaker 1: I always took pride and I didn't look down on it.
Speaker 1: I guess maybe I should have, but I didn't think, like,
Speaker 1: you know, saying uncle Ben was a bad thing. But anyway,
Speaker 1: I uh, you know what they want to sell the product,
Speaker 1: good luck. Uh, we'll see what comes next. And whatever
Speaker 1: they change it to, I'm sure someone will be offended
Speaker 1: by guaranteed. Yeah, what are you doing? Guests? Are you?
Speaker 1: What are you? What are you pausing here? What are
Speaker 1: you know? I'm listening to you. I was waiting for
Speaker 1: you to go out on the next you want me
Speaker 1: to go on that? All right? Yeah? Awkward? That was
Speaker 1: That was awkward. Kentucky Tay rights and says, if you
Speaker 1: could pick any place in the world to retire in
Speaker 1: and live out the rest of your days, where would
Speaker 1: you too? You're saying Hawaii for sure? Yeah. I love Hawaii, Kauai,
Speaker 1: the Garden island, just off the grid, away from every
Speaker 1: My wife she's not down with that because she's you know,
Speaker 1: we're all about we love family. We spent a lot
Speaker 1: of time with the family. I love my in laws,
Speaker 1: my um. My family pretty much left me, so I
Speaker 1: don't have My dad's about the only one left. But
Speaker 1: um yeah, I would go home, but it's too problem
Speaker 1: with Hawaiians. This travel to get anywhere, it's a five
Speaker 1: hour flights, so that's that is problematic. I don't know
Speaker 1: where else would be. It's somewhere cheap. A lot of
Speaker 1: people retiring Florida. What about Scottsdale, Yeah, that's expensive, those guts.
Speaker 1: That's the Beverly Hills of Arizona. But they say it's
Speaker 1: like the g V version of Beverly Hills. You know,
Speaker 1: Washington State would be fucking no, not Seattle and their
Speaker 1: own country, but Pacific Northwest. Okay, the people are a
Speaker 1: little fucked up, some of them, but living the weather
Speaker 1: and whatnot. I like kind of cool. And I've never
Speaker 1: been there, but you love you can't speak if you're
Speaker 1: been there. Hold on, I was prefacing this. You have
Speaker 1: a lot of Canadian listeners. That's right. People encourage to
Speaker 1: go to Vancouver. Like, I've never been in Vancouver, but
Speaker 1: I hear nothing but wonderful things. It's open, it's spacious,
Speaker 1: it's clean. Um, it's good for the economy. Obviously very
Speaker 1: green up there, but I heard it it's a great
Speaker 1: scene up in Vancouver. I'd love to go there. I
Speaker 1: don't know if I retire there. Um. Internationally, I'm I'm
Speaker 1: pretty fucking down for for Amsterdam. Amsterdam is is a
Speaker 1: wild scene, but it's also you just want to be
Speaker 1: the red light district with all the debaucheries. Yeah, just admitted,
Speaker 1: just admitted, it's all rights, first step admission. No, I
Speaker 1: don't know, okay, answering. I think that's a good place
Speaker 1: to stop. Yes, I think that's a good spot. Is that? Yes? Not?
Speaker 1: But we one more? Oh? No, not one more? Yeah,
Speaker 1: we got one more on a on a high, on
Speaker 1: a high. No, give me one from a femalell since
Speaker 1: we always get I don't see gender. I think we're
Speaker 1: all gender neutral. I don't know. I see I see
Speaker 1: gender on your shelves, so I really, you know, I
Speaker 1: don't have any other questions for women. I think we
Speaker 1: only like one or two from women this week, Tammy
Speaker 1: and Montana and I think our friend in Kentucky there.
Speaker 1: But that was it. Uh, let's see what else do
Speaker 1: we have? La la la la la. Jack in Greensboro,
Speaker 1: North Carolina, right since has been we all know you're
Speaker 1: a big softie with a heart of goal. Damn right, Jack,
Speaker 1: damn right, Mr softie over here. However, I'm sure you
Speaker 1: did some nefarious things as a child. What's something you
Speaker 1: got away with as a child that nobody in the
Speaker 1: family knows about. Well, let me tell you something. I
Speaker 1: had a Jewish mother, Um Mama Mallor, and I couldn't
Speaker 1: get away with ship man. I I don't. I mean
Speaker 1: I I was so sloppy as you know. I remember.
Speaker 1: I don't know if I've told this story before or not,
Speaker 1: but when I was in junior high school, let's tell
Speaker 1: my wife this story the other day. So I was
Speaker 1: in junior high school and some kid brought this piece
Speaker 1: of paper. This isn't the stone age before the internet.
Speaker 1: So this kid brings a piece of paper to school.
Speaker 1: It's like the like seven hundred ways to say the
Speaker 1: word fuck. Right now, I'm a junior high school kid
Speaker 1: and I'm learning profanity in in in school. So I'm like,
Speaker 1: this is the greatest thing ever. You know, this is
Speaker 1: this is amazing, you know, I love this. And so
Speaker 1: my my mom had a mailing business, like a mailing
Speaker 1: service that she was running mom and pop shop and
Speaker 1: all that stuff. And so so I took this this
Speaker 1: thing home and I went and I I'll never never.
Speaker 1: So I took it home and and I went to
Speaker 1: the copy machine and I printed up like fifty copies
Speaker 1: to pass out there my guys at school, you know,
Speaker 1: because I was gonna get I was gonna get cloud.
Speaker 1: I was going to pass out this thing how to
Speaker 1: say fuck, and every junior high school kid loves it.
Speaker 1: Right at that time, this was like a big deal
Speaker 1: back in the Stone Age, so it would have been
Speaker 1: the perfect crime guest on. But I made one mistake
Speaker 1: and I got caught. You don't know what the mistake is.
Speaker 1: So I print this thing up, I take the fifty
Speaker 1: copies off, I go to school. I forgot to take
Speaker 1: the original. I got called into the principal's office and
Speaker 1: I got read the Riot Act. And now, sweet little
Speaker 1: fat Benny, what are you doing? What are you doing?
Speaker 1: What's wrong with you and uh, well you you did
Speaker 1: worse than me, though you've admitted you mean you of
Speaker 1: course your dad was like the chief of the l A.
Speaker 1: P D. And you're running around with all kinds of
Speaker 1: debauchery going on. Yeah. I think one of the worst
Speaker 1: I mean that I actually did get away with UM
Speaker 1: was actually in academia. UM. And and a buddy who
Speaker 1: who listens to the to the podcast, he will fucking
Speaker 1: hate the story, but I mentioned him a lot, Buddy Patrick,
Speaker 1: who works for the l A. Fire Department in Norwalk. UM.
Speaker 1: I became good friends with him and my other buddy Colin,
Speaker 1: the one the doctor from Dublin that we had on
Speaker 1: on a show in in high school. And the reason
Speaker 1: why was because they were like the smartest guys in
Speaker 1: my class, and the class wasn't big, but they like
Speaker 1: stood out. Like Patrick was one of those guys who
Speaker 1: just retain all kinds of worthless information, but it was
Speaker 1: like stupid facts that he'd always retained, but it was
Speaker 1: always book smart, and Colin wasn't necessary book smart, but
Speaker 1: he was always on top of it in terms of
Speaker 1: studying and whatnot. So I was the jock of the
Speaker 1: group or the jock of the class, but we shared
Speaker 1: a physics class together, and and Ben like, when you're
Speaker 1: in those lab classes, you're not at regular desks, you're
Speaker 1: on these lab tables and calling and Patrick would sit
Speaker 1: behind me, but I would absolutely abuse them. So we'd
Speaker 1: be taking tests, or we'd be writing papers or doing studies,
Speaker 1: and while they were studying or writing or taking a test,
Speaker 1: I turned around and hit them with these metal rulers,
Speaker 1: just beating the ship out of them on their hands right. Well,
Speaker 1: so I had abused them in class, but at the
Speaker 1: end of our last semester in physics, had another buddy
Speaker 1: of mine, George, great fucking dude. Um, he wrote this
Speaker 1: this paper. I forget what it was on, but it
Speaker 1: was this long, ten fifteen page paper on a report
Speaker 1: that we were supposed to write for for the end
Speaker 1: of our our class. And I don't want to write it.
Speaker 1: I was like, funk this, I don't want to write it,
Speaker 1: too lazy about it. And I was at his house
Speaker 1: one day. We're playing video games, and we started talking
Speaker 1: about the paper, and I'm like, man, what kind of
Speaker 1: ideas do you have? And I knew he had already
Speaker 1: written his paper. What kind of ideas do you have
Speaker 1: or you know what did you do? Da da da
Speaker 1: da da? And he showed me his paper and and
Speaker 1: I took the paper and I went home and it
Speaker 1: was I think it was ten pages long. I wrote
Speaker 1: organically my first page for my assignment, and then took
Speaker 1: three many nine pages from his paper, and Bet I
Speaker 1: submitted it as my final. So I didn't. I wasn't.
Speaker 1: I didn't submit mine first to the teacher. I submitted
Speaker 1: mine last at the tail end, and Colin and PJ,
Speaker 1: Colin and Patrick knew this. We get our papers back
Speaker 1: and and Ben, we get them back, and Colin and
Speaker 1: Patrick were happy. I think they got like b pluses
Speaker 1: on their papers. I get mine back and it said
Speaker 1: a fucking minus. And I turned around and Patrick and
Speaker 1: Colin knew that I had done this. The look on
Speaker 1: their faces when not was like I had kicked a dog,
Speaker 1: dragged it down the street and then ate a whole
Speaker 1: Like these guys had this just look on their faces.
Speaker 1: It was fucking amazing. But which shows you the grading
Speaker 1: process is yeah, question questionable to lunch, but yeah, I
Speaker 1: will God, God help me. I will never forget the
Speaker 1: look on their faces because it was just all right.
Speaker 1: I gotta get out of here again. I got things
Speaker 1: to do again. Go all right, listen, I have a
Speaker 1: wonderful rest of your day. Be well, prosper all of
Speaker 1: that good stuff, and thank you. Remember five stars on
Speaker 1: the podcast. I we need your help on that five
Speaker 1: stars write a review. It's a pain in the ass,
Speaker 1: I know, but it does help us out. And enjoy
Speaker 1: the rest of your day. We'll be back on the
Speaker 1: radio tonight for the overnight. Sha. I'll be back here
Speaker 1: yapping away about the big stories of the weekend, and
Speaker 1: we'll catch you then.