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Speaker 1: Speaks to the planet.

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Speaker 2: I'll go by the name of Charlamagne the God and

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Speaker 2: guess what, I can't wait to see y'all at the

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Speaker 2: third annual Black Effect Podcast Festival. That's right, We're coming

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Speaker 2: back to Atlanta, Georgia, Saturday, April twenty six at Poleman

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Speaker 2: Yards and it's hosted by none other than Decisions Decisions,

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Speaker 2: Mandy B and Weezy. Okay, we got the R and

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Speaker 2: B Money podcast, were taking Jay Valentine. We got the

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Speaker 2: Woman of All Podcasts with Sarah Jake Roberts. We got

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Speaker 2: Good Mom's Bad Choices. Carrie Champion will be there with

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Speaker 2: her next sports podcast and the Trap Nerds podcast with

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Speaker 2: more to be announced. And of course it's bigger than podcasts.

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Speaker 2: We're bringing the Black Effect marketplace with black owned businesses

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Speaker 2: plus the food truck court to keep you fed.

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Speaker 3: While you visit us.

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Speaker 2: All right, listen, you don't want to miss this. Tap

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Speaker 2: in and grab your tickets now at Black Effect dot

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Speaker 2: Com Flash Podcast.

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Speaker 1: Festival, hoping to we talk back where we encourage you

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Speaker 1: to hustle, hard, laugh, letter and always keep it cute.

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Speaker 1: So grab your coffee, cocktail and crown because it's about

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Speaker 1: to go down's talk talk.

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Speaker 3: You're just too unapologetically black women with an opinion.

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Speaker 1: He talks back, what's up, y'all, it's your girl a

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Speaker 1: j holiday? What's up, tam Damn?

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Speaker 3: Hey, y'all. I love y'all so much.

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Speaker 1: Hey, I'm well, girls, stop light. These people love him.

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Speaker 3: I love him so much. They love me too.

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Speaker 1: Until you do some ship, they don't like, they're gonna

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Speaker 1: be dragging and it's trying to come for you for

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Speaker 1: look for sucking tubs.

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Speaker 3: I don't.

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Speaker 1: That's a lit ma noth until April. After April girls.

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Speaker 3: Drop, my mama gonna come up to me, coming told

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Speaker 3: for me yikes, and then walked off. I was like,

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Speaker 3: oh wow, everybody got something to say. Ye a man

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Speaker 3: foot in my mouth? Y'all put on a lot of

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Speaker 3: technic tests. I never put him wonder his foot in

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Speaker 3: my mouth? Shame Anyway, How was your weekend?

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Speaker 1: My weekend was great? Did I do something this weekend? Oh?

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Speaker 3: I did go outside?

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Speaker 1: Not outside for real, I just did like a little.

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Speaker 1: On Saturday, I went by one of my homegirl's house

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Speaker 1: who I recently reconnected with, and just talk some shit

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Speaker 1: for a couple hours over some crab bags. Me shout

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Speaker 1: out to Courtney girl, she'd be in roger Wood sausage.

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Speaker 1: When the last time you had a roger Wood sausage.

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Speaker 3: Roger Woods all the time?

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Speaker 1: Are you serious? Oh my god, First of all, on

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Speaker 1: you sausage, and don't put that shit in my bag

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Speaker 1: in my crab bag.

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Speaker 3: I don't want that in my crab bag either, because

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Speaker 3: it overpowers all the other food in there. But I

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Speaker 3: was have a roger Wood fried up good on spicing

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Speaker 3: bread with some must period.

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Speaker 1: Shame. Now back in the day when we was kids, like,

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Speaker 1: if you ain't having a roger Wood sausage in your house,

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Speaker 1: you really ain't have no food. As long was we

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Speaker 1: had a box of roger Wad sausage like we shit

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Speaker 1: was lit.

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Speaker 3: You eat and eggs and rama's straight.

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Speaker 1: I probably had a roger Wood sausage in middle school.

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Speaker 3: Damn. I had one a couple of days ago. So

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Speaker 3: this weekend it was the Black College Invitational Championship in Charlotte.

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Speaker 3: Is a new tournament. My friend Russy put it on y'all,

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Speaker 3: we got to support this tournament, like this is the

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Speaker 3: first year. He wants all our support, all the HBCUs.

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Speaker 3: He wants this involved y'all. So everyone, we got to

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Speaker 3: support this black basketball tournament in Charlotte, North Carolina, and

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Speaker 3: it was I saw a lot of parties surrounded just

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Speaker 3: like CI double A.

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Speaker 1: It's supposed to be coming back, right, CI double A.

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Speaker 3: I don't know, but this is about this one, this

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Speaker 3: black one brought on by blacks, presented by black people

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Speaker 3: for HBCUs. Y'all get involved intellect.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, did you attend any of the fescificity festivities?

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Speaker 3: I actually didn't get to go out to the tournament.

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Speaker 3: I did go to There's a new lounge in Charlotte

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Speaker 3: called Taranga that opened up over the weekend too, and

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Speaker 3: I popped out there and it was nice.

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Speaker 1: It was Taranga, Topanga, Taranga whever it comes.

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Speaker 3: From like that. I think it's called Tarango though, and

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Speaker 3: it was cute in there. So that opened over the weekend.

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Speaker 3: They're soft open, but that was soft about it. It

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Speaker 3: was fully open. So I went there and that was it.

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Speaker 3: You know, I don't get out too much these days,

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Speaker 3: I mean in the house. M hm.

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Speaker 1: Well that sounds fun.

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Speaker 3: It was fun. It was a good time. Meet Jamaican

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Speaker 3: and Raquel.

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Speaker 1: With Ja Maka Jamaica honestae Jamaican, so damn long.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it was a good time. Shout out to Jamaica

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Speaker 3: and Raquel, let's get in there now, what you got?

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Speaker 1: What you I You know what?

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Speaker 3: I keep seeing posts about a BBL smell. So this

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Speaker 3: one woman got on there and said the bbl's is

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Speaker 3: stinking and ain't nobody talking about it? That it spelled

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Speaker 3: like she said, it smelled like a pot of broccoli

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Speaker 3: that got to live on it and been sitting on

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Speaker 3: the stove for two days. God damn, Now, listen, if

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Speaker 3: you got a BBL, y'all, tell us do your shit

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Speaker 3: smell like broccoli every now and then when you swear

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Speaker 3: or something? And what causes that? So I looked up

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Speaker 3: the BBL smell and apparently there's some truth to it.

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Speaker 1: I've been hearing that for years, that the bbl's be leaking,

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Speaker 1: that they be smelling, And I don't know if it

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Speaker 1: has anything to do with that. Maybe, I don't know

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Speaker 1: if the the fact that was transferred to it is

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Speaker 1: like rotten. I don't know. I'm one of my little

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Speaker 1: cousins that got a BBL one time and her shit

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Speaker 1: went wrong. Tell me a motherfucker who ever got a

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Speaker 1: BBL in Charleston, South Carolina. I don't know, but she did, okay,

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Speaker 1: and they I remember going with her to an appointment

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Speaker 1: and they had to put guds in that thing, like

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Speaker 1: she had a whole back there because her body was

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Speaker 1: actually rejecting her own fat in that area. So she

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Speaker 1: got an infection. So I don't know if maybe because

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Speaker 1: you know these girls, they be having to get that

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Speaker 1: shit cut out now well wait wait, wait, let me

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Speaker 1: back up. Yeah, so that was a fat transfer. That's

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Speaker 1: different the bbls A lot of the women have, maybe

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Speaker 1: like the saline. Yeah, it's like the foreign matter that

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Speaker 1: they're putting into the body. It's not their own fat. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I did see your titty, bitch you. This girl is

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Speaker 1: such a whole like, yeah, I saw the nipple. But

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Speaker 1: why you gotta put it in the audio. She just

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Speaker 1: want everybody know her fucking pities is out your ass,

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Speaker 1: crazy ass. But look, I did google BBL smell and

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Speaker 1: it just said this is from South Shore Plastic Surgery,

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Speaker 1: it says, identifying the BBL smell. The BBL smell is

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Speaker 1: often described as musty or slightly sour, so that there

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Speaker 1: goes that broccoli with the lid on. But it should

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Speaker 1: not be overpowering. You may notice the order more prominently

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Speaker 1: after sweating or sitting for extended periods. However, the smell

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Speaker 1: is a company accompanied by other symptoms like redness, swelling,

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Speaker 1: or fever. These could be signs of infection. So if

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Speaker 1: the booty is smelling.

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Speaker 3: So that must be like a new BBL. The old

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Speaker 3: bbls can't be having this smell, right.

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Speaker 1: I think people be having problems with the old bbls.

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Speaker 1: They've had this thing sitting in their bodies for years rottening.

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Speaker 3: It's crazy. Yeah, I don't know. If it can rotten

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Speaker 3: your own fat, I don't know.

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Speaker 1: And it says maintaining optimal hygiene after BBL can be challenging.

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Speaker 1: I don't know why. Maybe because y'all put too much

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Speaker 1: as back there, especially when using the restroom. Residual stool

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Speaker 1: or urine on the skin can lead to bacterial growth

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Speaker 1: and older development if not clean thoroughly. Be extra diligent

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Speaker 1: about cleansing after bio movements and urination to prevent unwanted smells.

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Speaker 3: But ain't that to everybody?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm like that is not exclusive to booties, right.

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Speaker 3: Wipe your head is a thing for everybody, you will

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Speaker 3: think of your ass dirty, like what the hell?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I believe it's rottening though, I believe if it's

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Speaker 1: not just like the BBL with the fat transfer, like

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Speaker 1: using your own fat, which your body can also still

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Speaker 1: reject that, right, But you do have a lot of

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Speaker 1: women that were getting the asses added on before the

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Speaker 1: BBL fat transfer. It's been around, but yeah, they were

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Speaker 1: doing injections in the back of the club or in

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Speaker 1: some basement in New York City, like yeah, and people

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Speaker 1: were going to prison for performing these things. Fix a

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Speaker 1: flat in the ass all type of shit and your

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Speaker 1: ass is crazy.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, nuts, Well that's proof I ain't had no BBM.

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Speaker 3: My shit don't never smell like broccing now.

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Speaker 1: And you know, just like with anything else, like you

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Speaker 1: are the first person to smell these things. You should

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Speaker 1: not be bunking that ass round the club knowing that

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Speaker 1: this thing possibly be smelling like hot shit. Bunks that ass,

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Speaker 1: like bunks that ass.

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Speaker 3: You start experiencing that, you should probably go to a doctor,

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Speaker 3: because it got to be something that you can do

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Speaker 3: to help, you know, like combat the broccoli yell.

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Speaker 1: So I saw online and look, and I you might

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Speaker 1: think this is crazy. Personally, I don't think it is.

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Speaker 1: I think it's very plausible. If I were an attorney

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Speaker 1: and somebody brought this lawsuit to me, I'll be like,

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Speaker 1: you know what, you might be onto something. So apparently

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Speaker 1: a Russian man sued Apple for turning him gay. It

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Speaker 1: says a Russian man, uh, his name is d Razommulov,

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Speaker 1: fouled a lawsuit against Apple, claiming that the company's products

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Speaker 1: turned him gay. This is one of the most bizarre

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Speaker 1: legal cases in history, it says. It says he downloaded

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Speaker 1: a crypto app onto his phone where he started receiving

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Speaker 1: gay coin instead of bitcoin. The Apple apparently said, don't

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Speaker 1: judge until you try. Inspiring Razummulov, whatever, how are you

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Speaker 1: pronounce the last name? To begin having sex, to begin

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Speaker 1: having same sex relationships, he ended up falling in love

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Speaker 1: with another man, and now he is suing Apple because

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Speaker 1: of it.

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Speaker 3: About that the dumbest shit I ever heard. Didn't nobody

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Speaker 3: to make you fuck a dude, You chose it.

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Speaker 1: No, I think that, I really do think that there

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Speaker 1: is subliminal messaging with this. It's direct messaging. Don't knock

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Speaker 1: until you try it, you know what I'm saying? And

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Speaker 1: he actually tried it. You know, I know I've said

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Speaker 1: this on the show before. There's a lot of men

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Speaker 1: that are probably gay in the mind before they are

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Speaker 1: actually physically gay, right, or maybe some of them may

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Speaker 1: never ever act on the urge right to have sex

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Speaker 1: with it with the same sex, but they think about

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Speaker 1: it a lot and they just haven't gotten like the

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Speaker 1: opportune time or situation to do it. And now this

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Speaker 1: thing has enticed him to do it. He might have

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Speaker 1: a lawsuit.

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Speaker 3: He gonna lose, bag.

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Speaker 1: I don't think so. Think about that.

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Speaker 3: Accountability, Like Apple didn't make you go nowhere and fuck

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Speaker 3: no man, like that was a firm decision.

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Speaker 1: What if he can prove that Apple kept sending him

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Speaker 1: this message to his phone, like it just kept popping

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Speaker 1: up on his phone. Don't knock it to you tried.

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Speaker 3: That is not that is but Erica keep sending me

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Speaker 3: messages get broccoli soup. I ain't got none yet.

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Speaker 1: But McDonald's has been sued for a subliminal messaging many

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Speaker 1: times throughout history. Think about this young boy who just

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Speaker 1: committed suicide because AI told him to come be with him.

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Speaker 1: You see yeah this album, Yeah, like and if somebody I.

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Speaker 3: Just don't think sexual acts count because you have to

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Speaker 3: literally go do it, like you have to decide that

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Speaker 3: you want to have sex with another the same sex.

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Speaker 1: I think he got a lot of suit. We'll see.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna track it if you're win that.

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Speaker 3: I'm suing everybody for every choice I've ever made in

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Speaker 3: life that wasn't right, spending spending money on clothes. Y'all

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Speaker 3: keep sending me messages about buying clothes, and I keep

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Speaker 3: buying clothes and I ain't got no money. That's your fault.

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Speaker 3: So I'm gonna sue y'all, and I better win this.

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Speaker 3: Motherfucker win about it. Beat Apple. The Apple owe him

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Speaker 3: some money for him deciding to suck some dick. That

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Speaker 3: was a choice. If you want to suck some dick,

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Speaker 3: it's okay, but don't don't. Don't put it on Apple.

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Speaker 3: Apple ain't got nothing to do with it. It's okay, Eve.

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Speaker 1: I feel like we could find some lawsuits where people

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Speaker 1: probably suit him one for these things. They may not

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Speaker 1: publicize them heavily because they don't want other people trying

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Speaker 1: and shit, but you know, like all lawyers got to

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Speaker 1: do is convince the jury.

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Speaker 3: That's it.

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Speaker 1: And I feel like he would be able to his

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Speaker 1: attorney may be able to convince the jury that they.

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Speaker 3: Got ain't no way. I don't know who else going

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Speaker 3: to be able to win that kid, Me, that's who me.

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Speaker 3: Look what else happened over the weekend? Oh did you

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Speaker 3: see where Young Miami? She was on Shannon Shark m

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Speaker 3: C Club and she explained that she'll give her significant

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Speaker 3: other or four times to cheat before she calls it

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Speaker 3: a rap. Four times to cheat. That number is very specific.

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Speaker 1: I give my four times that I haven't watched a

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Speaker 1: full interview yet. I only saw like the clips online,

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Speaker 1: but I laughed my ass off where she said like

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Speaker 1: four times, y'all Miami ass funny as hell without trying

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Speaker 1: to be funny. She just right round the way girl,

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Speaker 1: because you.

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Speaker 3: Can't even you shouldn't even if that's the case, you

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Speaker 3: shouldn't say it out loud. I feel like the nigga

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Speaker 3: gonna be like shit, you said I had four times?

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Speaker 3: I seen it a club shack shade girl.

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Speaker 1: I have an ex boyfriend who always, like, at least

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Speaker 1: once every two years, I might speak to this nigga,

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Speaker 1: and he always complains about how I didn't give him second, third, fourth, chance.

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Speaker 1: You give all these other niggas a chance, you ain't

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Speaker 1: never get to fuck me over again. You mad because

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Speaker 1: I gave another nigga a chance to fuck me over

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Speaker 1: and not you. Right, that is beyond me. These people's thinking, Nah, nigga,

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Speaker 1: I just didn't feel like you were worth all these

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Speaker 1: extra chances, which he had a lot. So I'm trying

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Speaker 1: to figure out what the fuck are you talking about? Like, yes,

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Speaker 1: I'm definitely not about to give a nigga like okay,

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Speaker 1: if you want to strike off one, you got three left.

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Speaker 3: I'm like some people, cheating is an ultimate deal worker.

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Speaker 3: It's the ultimate disrespect for the relationships. Some people, it ain't.

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Speaker 1: You know, I'm a go ahead.

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Speaker 3: I always have to weigh like, am I'm more happy

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Speaker 3: than not? That's always an answer for me in every scenario.

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Speaker 3: Am I smiling more or not smiling enough? Then I

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Speaker 3: gotta go. It don't matter what the infraction is.

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Speaker 1: Right or how many times. I mean, the more you

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Speaker 1: do shit, I'm losing like respect for you, I'm losing trust.

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Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. So even if you and

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Speaker 1: then eventually you ain't gonna be able to trust me, nigga,

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Speaker 1: because I'm gonna make you feel it, you know, So

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Speaker 1: do you really want to be here after? You don't

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Speaker 1: shoot on me? A lot of times I may not

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Speaker 1: have left you, and that's a toxic trade of mine.

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Speaker 1: I may not leave you right for cheating, but you're

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Speaker 1: gonna feel my wrath and I'm not even I may

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Speaker 1: I'm not gonna say nothing, but you're gonna feel like

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Speaker 1: something going on. Okay, So don't play with me because

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Speaker 1: I do. I'm I am a one upper.

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Speaker 3: My daddy said when he had cheated on my mom

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Speaker 3: when they were young, and Mama took him back, but

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Speaker 3: he said we had to eat out the same plate

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Speaker 3: for like two months before he trusted the eating over

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Speaker 3: here with your fork because we're not eating out a

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Speaker 3: different bowl.

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Speaker 1: He thought she was gonna poison him. Yep, why are

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Speaker 1: you still with somebody you can't trust in that? I

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Speaker 1: never understand why men stay with women they still eat

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Speaker 1: food from. But you don't trust me?

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Speaker 2: Right?

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Speaker 1: Just be eating up this food, asking me what I'm cooking,

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Speaker 1: asking me what we eating? But you but you scared?

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Speaker 1: You ain't scared enough. You ain't scared, You are not

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Speaker 1: scared enough? All right, y'all? So for this week's episode.

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Speaker 1: Tell me when the last time you watched Wayne Takes Hell?

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Speaker 1: The other day for realm So I have watched it

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Speaker 1: as like a super adult because I feel like we

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Speaker 1: would have been teenagers when it came out, right, Like

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Speaker 1: I have watched it, Girl beat it. I wasn't born yet.

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Speaker 1: I saw it last week. Girl Get out of Here.

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Speaker 3: A vintage movie for me.

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Speaker 1: Like I don't know if we were watching Wayne Takes

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Speaker 1: Hell like when we actually got into these like serious relationships.

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Speaker 1: When you have watched Waiting Takes Heil, And I do

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Speaker 1: suggest y'all to go watch it now if you haven't

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Speaker 1: in the last five years, six years, ten years, whatever

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Speaker 1: it is.

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Speaker 3: I the other day on the plane, right he has

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Speaker 3: one of those movies.

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Speaker 1: On the flight, Go watch it because I want to

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Speaker 1: talk about it with you, but I also want to

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Speaker 1: talk about it like with the listeners. What y'all think

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Speaker 1: about Waiting Takes Heale as it pertains to like our

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Speaker 1: life now and dating, did anything change? Is it the

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Speaker 1: same shit we now experiencing what we saw them as

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Speaker 1: you know, grown women, career women, mothers, single fine bitch,

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Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Like, like, are we experiencing

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Speaker 1: the same things.

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Speaker 3: Let's get into it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we'll be right back, all right now, asorry from

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Speaker 1: you know, just thinking about the characters on Waiting the

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Speaker 1: Waiting Takes Hell. I actually came across this post and

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Speaker 1: I sent it to Tamman. I just want to read

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Speaker 1: a couple of parts of it, right, because it says,

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Speaker 1: after watching excuse me, after we watching Waiting Takes Hell

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Speaker 1: for the first time since I was younger, same shit, right,

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Speaker 1: it felt to me. Excuse me, It left me with

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Speaker 1: a lot to unpack. And here's a whole thread, right.

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Speaker 1: So it begins with saying, like, so this movie is

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Speaker 1: classically known for the infamous scene of Bernadine, that character

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Speaker 1: that was played by Angela Angel Bassett, Yeah, setting her

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Speaker 1: soon to be ex husband clothes on fire in his car.

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Speaker 1: But that wasn't the only thing that exploded, right, So

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Speaker 1: she's saying, like, mentally, now, let's just unpack that one

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Speaker 1: part because I literally have that the scene where she

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Speaker 1: walked up in the ballroom and slapped that white bitch.

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Speaker 1: I got that shit saved on Instagram.

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Speaker 3: I seen it one day, and I.

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Speaker 1: Love that part of the movie. Bernardine.

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Speaker 2: I'm in a meeting here.

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Speaker 3: If you need something, I suggest, would.

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Speaker 1: You mind terribly if I had a few words with

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Speaker 1: my husband? Oh? What the hell are you doing? I've

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Speaker 1: been to the bank. Thank you, thank you for thanking

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Speaker 1: of your children. Everybody out, yes, out, you're comfort wife,

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Speaker 1: and start throwing some tantrum because you can't finish what

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Speaker 1: you started. What am I supposed to do for money?

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Speaker 1: I gave you the house now, sun.

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Speaker 3: I think we all enjoyed that part.

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Speaker 1: That looked like it was a real slap.

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Speaker 3: It was not.

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Speaker 1: It looked really real, like they acted the shit out

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Speaker 1: of that part.

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Speaker 3: She's like, do you excuse me? Do you think I

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Speaker 3: could talk to my husband for a second. She's like, sure,

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Speaker 3: I didn't.

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Speaker 1: So the next threat, the next party threat says, there's

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Speaker 1: a heavy depiction of a loneliness and how women can

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Speaker 1: consistently say yes to things that say no to them.

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Speaker 1: That's true, right when you like kind of lonely?

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Speaker 3: Mm hmm, this is definitely uh me, you be settled

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Speaker 3: up for shit, right, entertaining old shit just because it's familiar,

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Speaker 3: but it don't really align with what I really want

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Speaker 3: or desire, honestly, and the loneliness get to you. Man

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Speaker 3: that ship, I'll tell you, and your body will betray

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Speaker 3: your mind every time.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and then you asking asking different you asking a

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Speaker 1: universe for one thing, right, but you're not doing your

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Speaker 1: part because you're lonely. And I say this a lot.

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Speaker 1: I remember when one of my friends, her daughter is

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Speaker 1: my goddaughter. She she sent me a text message one

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Speaker 1: day and asked me like to help her basically write

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Speaker 1: a letter to my goddaughter graduating from high school. And

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Speaker 1: one of the main things I said for her to

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Speaker 1: put in this letters like get comfortable being alone, you know,

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Speaker 1: be okay with yourself. You know. Yeah that And it's

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Speaker 1: really not though, because I do like solitude. I do

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Speaker 1: like being by myself.

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Speaker 3: And you're ever seeing you be single. I've been you

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Speaker 3: be like a man, you be like consistently with a

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Speaker 3: new nigga.

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Speaker 1: That's not true. See it's mental though, right. I might physically,

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Speaker 1: but they don't God me, mentally.

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Speaker 3: You got another nigga already. God damn, I can't have

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Speaker 3: a nigga. I never have a nigga. This nigga have

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Speaker 3: a new nigga every couple of months.

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Speaker 1: It's the physical, not the mental anyway, girls, I'm telling

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Speaker 1: my business like I want to be telling it. It

401
00:22:24,920 --> 00:22:29,760
Speaker 1: is also revealed how sometimes single mothers put the responsibility

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Speaker 1: on their sons to be the man of the house

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Speaker 1: and absence of their fathers.

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Speaker 3: Absolutely, So that's Bernardine Bernadine definitely, and I know women

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Speaker 3: like not Bernardine.

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Speaker 1: That's the character of that Gloria, Yeah, Gloria.

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00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:49,159
Speaker 3: Gloria does that, who was played by Loretta Devine. She

408
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Speaker 3: definitely enmeshed her son like and just treated him like

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Speaker 3: he was her man instead of her son, and didn't

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Speaker 3: want him to go hang out with friends, want him

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Speaker 3: to travel, didn't want him to experience because she had

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Speaker 3: put that responsibility on her son to be her man. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: she stopped doing that. It's a lot of y'all moms

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00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:14,720
Speaker 3: out here listening to us right now. Stop doing that

415
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Speaker 3: to your son, not his responsibility.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and so they lean on you know, when I

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Speaker 1: checked into the hotel when I went to Dallas last week,

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Speaker 1: I told the girl at the desk, like, yeah, I

419
00:23:27,880 --> 00:23:29,680
Speaker 1: do a podcast, so you know, I sent it to

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Speaker 1: her so she could listen to a young girl. And

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Speaker 1: she was like, you know, y'all should do an episode

422
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Speaker 1: on black women and their sons. And I didn't understand

423
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Speaker 1: what she was talking about until she like explained more.

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Speaker 1: Because she's the daughter, right, and she has a brother

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00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:48,560
Speaker 1: that the mom you know, puts you on this pedestal. Yeah,

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00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:51,119
Speaker 1: And I explained to her this is what it is,

427
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:53,399
Speaker 1: because she is using her son as a place filler

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Speaker 1: for the man she doesn't have. So when I say

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Speaker 1: I don't like men who got mamas, this is exactly

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Speaker 1: why I need your mom to be in a healthy relationship.

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00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:05,679
Speaker 1: So she's not interfering in ours, right, That's it, you know.

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Speaker 1: So it goes on to say, we see a normal

433
00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:14,280
Speaker 1: We see a normality of women settling for temporary satisfaction

434
00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:18,359
Speaker 1: with married men in exchange for a false reality of companionship.

435
00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:23,360
Speaker 1: Reassurance can provide the comfort of a weighted blanket, even

436
00:24:23,440 --> 00:24:24,560
Speaker 1: if it is an illusion.

437
00:24:26,560 --> 00:24:28,760
Speaker 3: And now that's Savanna played by Whitney Houston.

438
00:24:32,000 --> 00:24:36,760
Speaker 1: Yep, And they remember the scene where Bernadine met the

439
00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:39,400
Speaker 1: guy played by Wesley Snipes.

440
00:24:39,880 --> 00:24:44,359
Speaker 3: Oh, I think no. First of all, Bernadine Angela Bassett

441
00:24:44,720 --> 00:24:52,040
Speaker 3: met Herbert. Who Herbert, he's harmless. Now he was married

442
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:54,440
Speaker 3: when she went and fucked him.

443
00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:55,320
Speaker 1: And it's kind of like, all.

444
00:24:55,280 --> 00:24:57,879
Speaker 3: Right, you upset about your husband leaving and then you

445
00:24:57,880 --> 00:25:02,720
Speaker 3: went and fuck somebody else's husband. I've seen contradictory it is,

446
00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:07,359
Speaker 3: And see that's why I beat bitches up because it

447
00:25:07,359 --> 00:25:10,320
Speaker 3: would be the hypocrisy for me. How you smashing somebody

448
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:12,560
Speaker 3: else man, but you don't want nobody smashing your man.

449
00:25:12,920 --> 00:25:14,639
Speaker 1: Like what goes around comes around.

450
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:17,600
Speaker 3: You're doing some shit you just got finished doing. It's crazy.

451
00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:19,639
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I ain't gonna sit up here on this

452
00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:23,120
Speaker 1: goddamn what kind of Mike's Jesus? On the sure Mike

453
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:25,919
Speaker 1: and Lions say that I never have sex with or

454
00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:28,760
Speaker 1: fucked with somebody else's man, I absolutely have. That's why

455
00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:32,560
Speaker 1: I'm never surprised when it shit happens to me. It

456
00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:35,199
Speaker 1: just you just can't be an habitual side bitch when

457
00:25:35,240 --> 00:25:37,280
Speaker 1: it comes to me, Like you just can't always be

458
00:25:37,359 --> 00:25:39,199
Speaker 1: trying to fuck on my man. It's a problem for me,

459
00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:42,320
Speaker 1: right stothing a.

460
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:43,040
Speaker 3: Part time.

461
00:25:45,600 --> 00:25:47,600
Speaker 1: You get four times to fuck my nigga, and on

462
00:25:47,720 --> 00:25:52,520
Speaker 1: a full time I'm beating your ass cause the niggas

463
00:25:52,520 --> 00:25:57,680
Speaker 1: for everybody.

464
00:25:55,760 --> 00:25:58,760
Speaker 3: Listen, I ain't never been with nobody, uh.

465
00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:04,639
Speaker 1: Girl, Come on, come on, okay, come on, never love.

466
00:26:04,600 --> 00:26:08,320
Speaker 3: You next s lot.

467
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:12,960
Speaker 1: You make me made me click off my damn slides.

468
00:26:13,040 --> 00:26:16,879
Speaker 1: Hold No one, we got a in this day, I

469
00:26:17,440 --> 00:26:17,960
Speaker 1: why you're.

470
00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:20,399
Speaker 3: Trying to find it? While grieving in the moment of

471
00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:23,679
Speaker 3: love loss, one would settle for just being held to

472
00:26:23,800 --> 00:26:26,920
Speaker 3: remind themselves that they too have some level of capacity.

473
00:26:27,440 --> 00:26:29,680
Speaker 1: M hm. And that was the scene with her and

474
00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:31,879
Speaker 1: I don't even know what his name was in the movie.

475
00:26:31,920 --> 00:26:36,240
Speaker 3: Do you know you remember Wesley Snipes? No, I don't remember.

476
00:26:38,119 --> 00:26:41,240
Speaker 1: I remember, but yeah, they didn't have sex. They just

477
00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:44,239
Speaker 1: met at a bar in a hotel and they just

478
00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:49,440
Speaker 1: spent the night together just for some intimacy.

479
00:26:49,880 --> 00:26:51,880
Speaker 3: He's still cheated on his wife by doing that.

480
00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:55,760
Speaker 1: Well, his wife was was terminally ill also, you know,

481
00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:59,080
Speaker 1: so if I was a terminally ill wife, like please

482
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:02,479
Speaker 1: go live your life, I would not want somebody to

483
00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:04,800
Speaker 1: be like just at my bedside.

484
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:07,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I would want them at my bedsite.

485
00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:12,000
Speaker 3: But I would understand if he was cuddling with somebody

486
00:27:12,240 --> 00:27:18,119
Speaker 3: to be comforted in the mister my you know me dying?

487
00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:21,800
Speaker 1: Do you remember? I can't remember her name though, This

488
00:27:21,880 --> 00:27:24,320
Speaker 1: is just I have to find a story and tell

489
00:27:24,359 --> 00:27:27,840
Speaker 1: you all about it. But it was a black woman.

490
00:27:27,920 --> 00:27:30,280
Speaker 1: She was very famous, like on social media and stuff,

491
00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:32,800
Speaker 1: and she had got like Parkinson. No, she had got dementia.

492
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:35,639
Speaker 1: I believe she came she was diagnosed with dementia and

493
00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:39,040
Speaker 1: she was declining like so imagine like I don't know,

494
00:27:39,080 --> 00:27:43,320
Speaker 1: Oprah renfree all of a sudden, and and her husband

495
00:27:44,119 --> 00:27:47,359
Speaker 1: now has has her propped up with his new white

496
00:27:47,359 --> 00:27:53,080
Speaker 1: bitch next to him, like there's still yeah, he's now

497
00:27:53,160 --> 00:27:56,600
Speaker 1: moved his new woman in while he cares for his.

498
00:27:57,119 --> 00:28:01,600
Speaker 3: Wait till my dad. I'm still living, God damn.

499
00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:06,119
Speaker 1: And y'all on my page right the nerve.

500
00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:09,960
Speaker 3: But some niggas will just leave you to feel for yourself.

501
00:28:10,640 --> 00:28:13,520
Speaker 3: So I guess that's better than that. But it's don't

502
00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:15,760
Speaker 3: bring that bitch, don't have, we don't need, We ain't

503
00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:17,560
Speaker 3: in no throuble because I'm sick.

504
00:28:19,240 --> 00:28:22,040
Speaker 1: And she just looking sitting there, looking out of place,

505
00:28:22,280 --> 00:28:25,280
Speaker 1: just wondering, you know, herself anymore?

506
00:28:25,760 --> 00:28:31,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, all right. The next line says, and how could

507
00:28:31,440 --> 00:28:33,960
Speaker 3: we forget the fact that sometimes parents will project the

508
00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:36,879
Speaker 3: areas of lacking their life and try to control your

509
00:28:36,920 --> 00:28:38,920
Speaker 3: destiny based off of their fear.

510
00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:43,360
Speaker 1: Been there barn mm hmm.

511
00:28:43,720 --> 00:28:48,440
Speaker 3: So that mama was encouraging her to sleep with somebody

512
00:28:48,440 --> 00:28:51,240
Speaker 3: else's husband and have and build a relationship with someone

513
00:28:51,280 --> 00:28:54,200
Speaker 3: as a husband because she didn't want her to end

514
00:28:54,280 --> 00:29:00,480
Speaker 3: up alone like her, he's a good man, Savannah. We

515
00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:05,040
Speaker 3: shared that line so much, but he really wasn't. He

516
00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:09,160
Speaker 3: wasn't good a good man at all.

517
00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:11,560
Speaker 1: He was not good at all. And you know, I

518
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,080
Speaker 1: kind of had that issue with my mama man still

519
00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:16,240
Speaker 1: talking to my ex fiance, like, get off the phone

520
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:18,760
Speaker 1: with that nigga. And it was only because that nigga

521
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:21,040
Speaker 1: could build shit from scratch and she didn't have that

522
00:29:21,160 --> 00:29:24,320
Speaker 1: her own relationship, like somebody who was like hands on

523
00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:26,440
Speaker 1: could do all the things that she likes to do

524
00:29:26,760 --> 00:29:31,360
Speaker 1: and doing with her Like I'm being abused by this nigga.

525
00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:34,200
Speaker 3: Some carpety.

526
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:36,520
Speaker 1: She like, keep talking to him so you can put

527
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:41,640
Speaker 1: this tile up in the kitchen. First break up that

528
00:29:41,680 --> 00:29:47,760
Speaker 1: really happened in real life, Mama, hey girl, or the

529
00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:50,960
Speaker 1: next one? So I said. The common theme in that

530
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:53,920
Speaker 1: the common theme is that black women are expected to

531
00:29:54,120 --> 00:29:58,480
Speaker 1: settle and see wherever you land, even if it means

532
00:29:58,520 --> 00:30:02,040
Speaker 1: sharing with someone else. A lot of the things, a

533
00:30:02,040 --> 00:30:04,560
Speaker 1: lot of things can build up, but how does one

534
00:30:04,600 --> 00:30:08,720
Speaker 1: release when these things get too heavy? And it says

535
00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:11,000
Speaker 1: now again, I watched this as a kid and won't

536
00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:14,000
Speaker 1: take away from it being a classic, But now as

537
00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:17,720
Speaker 1: an adult, I question if the title Waiting to Exhale

538
00:30:18,320 --> 00:30:22,560
Speaker 1: is a sign of foreshadowing that may never come. Y'all,

539
00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:25,600
Speaker 1: let me know what y'all think and see. Thus now

540
00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:29,320
Speaker 1: our conversation about these characters in the movie, because really,

541
00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:34,160
Speaker 1: waiting takes hell. Were y'all really like they damn show

542
00:30:34,360 --> 00:30:39,520
Speaker 1: was their damn show was waiting? Yeah? And I feel

543
00:30:39,600 --> 00:30:43,520
Speaker 1: like these characters still exist today amongst the women and

544
00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:47,880
Speaker 1: then the archaeotype, like these men also still exist. These

545
00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:50,760
Speaker 1: same type of relationships still go on, and you just

546
00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:55,320
Speaker 1: throw social media on tomics, right. Imagine if they had

547
00:30:55,320 --> 00:30:58,920
Speaker 1: social media, then Bernardine would have been on Instagram blasting

548
00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:00,000
Speaker 1: the shit out that white lady.

549
00:31:00,960 --> 00:31:02,680
Speaker 3: Somebody would have took a video of her all up

550
00:31:02,720 --> 00:31:04,000
Speaker 3: on Herbert in the club.

551
00:31:05,360 --> 00:31:08,000
Speaker 1: Exactly. The slap would have been on the internet in

552
00:31:08,040 --> 00:31:11,640
Speaker 1: real time. You know, if social media existed, somebody would

553
00:31:11,640 --> 00:31:13,640
Speaker 1: have been in that office recording that shit. Like you

554
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:15,480
Speaker 1: really could get away with murder back in the day.

555
00:31:15,880 --> 00:31:18,080
Speaker 1: Now not so much. Yeah, ye.

556
00:31:19,760 --> 00:31:24,080
Speaker 3: The pool side, Yeah, we getting pictures of you ho exactly,

557
00:31:24,680 --> 00:31:27,880
Speaker 3: So here's like the I guess like the character breakdowns.

558
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:32,880
Speaker 1: Right. So Savannah, which is played by Whitney Houston, she's

559
00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:36,920
Speaker 1: a successful career woman searching for love. Okay, so that's

560
00:31:36,920 --> 00:31:38,760
Speaker 1: a lot of women's stories. Like you know that you

561
00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:40,720
Speaker 1: got the men out here, the Red pel community and

562
00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:43,480
Speaker 1: other regular black men are saying, we don't give a

563
00:31:43,480 --> 00:31:46,560
Speaker 1: shit about y'all degrees, jobs, y'all be acting nasty when

564
00:31:46,560 --> 00:31:50,960
Speaker 1: you get them, and you know, we just want good women, right.

565
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:54,600
Speaker 1: But it is the more money you make, the more

566
00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:58,080
Speaker 1: assets you acquire, sometimes it is hard to find love,

567
00:31:58,160 --> 00:32:00,520
Speaker 1: you know, because who really loves you? Who's trying to

568
00:32:00,600 --> 00:32:03,600
Speaker 1: use you? It's like we have to we have to

569
00:32:03,680 --> 00:32:07,360
Speaker 1: really And then the successful men don't really want a

570
00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:11,640
Speaker 1: woman that's as successful as them. It's like some maybe

571
00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:13,880
Speaker 1: it's a subconscious thing for them. I don't know that they.

572
00:32:13,840 --> 00:32:15,880
Speaker 3: Don't even realize a power thing.

573
00:32:16,320 --> 00:32:19,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you can't really control this woman in a way.

574
00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:24,520
Speaker 1: Or maybe maybe women the more degrees you get, the

575
00:32:24,560 --> 00:32:27,440
Speaker 1: more money you make, maybe you aren't culchable, Maybe you

576
00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:30,120
Speaker 1: can't be led. You know, that's something to think about.

577
00:32:30,560 --> 00:32:31,560
Speaker 3: What was a nigga name?

578
00:32:31,640 --> 00:32:31,920
Speaker 1: Who?

579
00:32:32,040 --> 00:32:37,080
Speaker 3: Uh? Who? She's like? I gave him twenty dollars. Gas

580
00:32:37,120 --> 00:32:39,680
Speaker 3: came to seven dollars and he didn't even bring me

581
00:32:39,760 --> 00:32:42,480
Speaker 3: my change and he was in here her tooth brush

582
00:32:42,520 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 3: and shit, there was like.

583
00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:51,400
Speaker 1: And it was over like a couple like thirtys That

584
00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:55,960
Speaker 1: was the guy Robin was fucking with, right that Savannah?

585
00:32:56,840 --> 00:32:58,560
Speaker 3: Really, Yeah, I'm gonna keep it at the zoo.

586
00:32:59,360 --> 00:33:07,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know the damn movie orbat him nut.

587
00:33:08,160 --> 00:33:10,960
Speaker 3: I noticed movie Girl and I just watched it over again.

588
00:33:11,080 --> 00:33:15,560
Speaker 1: So yeah, so it says you. So she's trying to

589
00:33:15,600 --> 00:33:18,760
Speaker 1: like maintain her Savannah's trying to maintain her self respect

590
00:33:18,840 --> 00:33:23,920
Speaker 1: and recognize when a relationship isn't serving her right. So

591
00:33:24,320 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 1: that's a lot of our stories, like being able to

592
00:33:26,720 --> 00:33:29,280
Speaker 1: see when she's not working out and walk away earlyer.

593
00:33:30,280 --> 00:33:33,800
Speaker 3: That's that be the part for me, mm hmm, because

594
00:33:33,840 --> 00:33:35,800
Speaker 3: I'll be mad about something and be like, I'm done

595
00:33:35,840 --> 00:33:38,960
Speaker 3: with this motherfucker, and then when I'm unmad, I let

596
00:33:39,040 --> 00:33:39,600
Speaker 3: him come back.

597
00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:42,720
Speaker 1: The thing is I don't never get unmad because I

598
00:33:42,760 --> 00:33:46,560
Speaker 1: do hold grudges, right, So then what keeps happening is

599
00:33:46,600 --> 00:33:51,719
Speaker 1: that I'm just adjusting. I'm just like living in like

600
00:33:51,840 --> 00:33:55,280
Speaker 1: just adjusting. And you may not like who are to

601
00:33:55,320 --> 00:33:57,720
Speaker 1: come after a while, I'm.

602
00:33:57,720 --> 00:33:59,760
Speaker 3: Not mad no more. I had to make a video

603
00:33:59,840 --> 00:34:05,520
Speaker 3: to myself. Look, I'm you're fucking stupid again.

604
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:09,280
Speaker 1: Well, I don't be like just mad, let's just consistently mad.

605
00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:13,400
Speaker 1: But I I don't never forget you see what I'm saying.

606
00:34:13,680 --> 00:34:17,920
Speaker 1: So you think shit cool. I it's here and it

607
00:34:17,960 --> 00:34:20,400
Speaker 1: ain't going nowhere. I may not act mad every single

608
00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:23,319
Speaker 1: day because that's just not my I don't walk around mad.

609
00:34:23,360 --> 00:34:25,720
Speaker 1: I'm just my normal setting is happy.

610
00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:26,960
Speaker 3: So you don't let shit go.

611
00:34:28,640 --> 00:34:33,279
Speaker 1: Not really, I just put a people either. I don't.

612
00:34:33,360 --> 00:34:36,200
Speaker 1: It's not about not letting things go okay once Okay,

613
00:34:36,320 --> 00:34:39,560
Speaker 1: I put a sticky note on you, right. I may

614
00:34:39,600 --> 00:34:43,640
Speaker 1: not let that thing determine how I handle things with

615
00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:46,200
Speaker 1: you in the future. But if there is, like uh,

616
00:34:46,880 --> 00:34:49,480
Speaker 1: if I can tie this new thing to that thing,

617
00:34:50,040 --> 00:34:52,319
Speaker 1: it still exists. It's not that I didn't forget about it.

618
00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:55,640
Speaker 1: You're still doing the thing. Okay, you see what I'm saying,

619
00:34:56,200 --> 00:34:59,320
Speaker 1: So that I won't say that. I just hold grudges

620
00:34:59,360 --> 00:35:01,000
Speaker 1: and I'm just not fuck with you no more because

621
00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:03,240
Speaker 1: obviously I've fucked with people who have done some super

622
00:35:03,239 --> 00:35:06,799
Speaker 1: dirty shit to me, and I do give grace and

623
00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:08,560
Speaker 1: room for people to grow the same way I need

624
00:35:08,680 --> 00:35:12,680
Speaker 1: room to grow. But if the shit looked fucking routine,

625
00:35:12,760 --> 00:35:14,840
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna forget. I remember because I got it.

626
00:35:14,880 --> 00:35:17,080
Speaker 1: I've been at a sticky note on your ass. I

627
00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:20,960
Speaker 1: don't forget to the Bernardine character, which I think everybody

628
00:35:20,960 --> 00:35:22,799
Speaker 1: loves her character, right, I feel like she has like

629
00:35:22,880 --> 00:35:26,640
Speaker 1: had like the biggest, biggest part and the biggest storyline

630
00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:29,160
Speaker 1: in the movie for the most part. So I mean

631
00:35:29,239 --> 00:35:32,719
Speaker 1: her husband did the worst shit you could think of, right,

632
00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:36,120
Speaker 1: you help this man build this company together, I mean

633
00:35:36,239 --> 00:35:38,759
Speaker 1: build this company. Yeah, you know what I'm saying. Now,

634
00:35:38,800 --> 00:35:41,759
Speaker 1: he's just like discarding you. You got children for him,

635
00:35:42,120 --> 00:35:44,440
Speaker 1: and he's like, I'll get them for the holidays, like

636
00:35:44,719 --> 00:35:46,600
Speaker 1: just not leaving you with nothing, which I don't even

637
00:35:46,640 --> 00:35:49,680
Speaker 1: understand how that can even happen. Like she put her

638
00:35:49,719 --> 00:35:51,640
Speaker 1: whole life to the side for his dreams.

639
00:35:51,719 --> 00:35:57,320
Speaker 3: She made him her whole life. She did. We should

640
00:35:57,320 --> 00:35:59,799
Speaker 3: all take a lesson from that, because you'll fall in

641
00:35:59,840 --> 00:36:02,759
Speaker 3: love and you know, want to be the most supportive

642
00:36:02,840 --> 00:36:07,200
Speaker 3: partner and lose yourself and look up. And this nigga

643
00:36:07,239 --> 00:36:10,160
Speaker 3: has all this money now and done all these things

644
00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:14,000
Speaker 3: and if he don't love you anymore, now you just

645
00:36:14,840 --> 00:36:19,200
Speaker 3: lost her. King was definitely lost after this, like cut

646
00:36:19,239 --> 00:36:20,840
Speaker 3: my hair. If you don't come with a cut it,

647
00:36:20,960 --> 00:36:24,000
Speaker 3: I'll cut the shit like she didn't even know, like

648
00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:27,880
Speaker 3: you know, who she was was anymore without her.

649
00:36:29,080 --> 00:36:32,320
Speaker 1: And then in today's time, Bernardine would be on social

650
00:36:32,360 --> 00:36:35,080
Speaker 1: media and there would be men calling her washed up

651
00:36:35,520 --> 00:36:38,919
Speaker 1: and baggage, baggage and all this shit because she gave

652
00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:42,359
Speaker 1: a man her whole life. Yep, you know, and now

653
00:36:42,360 --> 00:36:44,560
Speaker 1: they're acting like, Okay, you can't do any better. You know,

654
00:36:44,760 --> 00:36:47,120
Speaker 1: nobody wants you now, which is bullshit.

655
00:36:47,320 --> 00:36:50,160
Speaker 3: Niggas at the seven and eleventh the other night where

656
00:36:50,200 --> 00:36:52,160
Speaker 3: the night got on the rollers in her head call

657
00:36:52,239 --> 00:36:53,880
Speaker 3: I had to take my girlfriend home.

658
00:36:55,160 --> 00:37:01,719
Speaker 1: Do you remember that, yeah, dean man, Like, so I

659
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:06,120
Speaker 1: am guilty of definitely losing myself in a relationship and

660
00:37:06,200 --> 00:37:09,040
Speaker 1: looking at not doing my hair no more. Meanwhile, this

661
00:37:09,120 --> 00:37:11,080
Speaker 1: nigga making jokes by how he looks younger than me,

662
00:37:11,920 --> 00:37:15,520
Speaker 1: and shit, because you are literally stealing my life force, right,

663
00:37:16,360 --> 00:37:19,080
Speaker 1: you know, because women we give a lot of ourselves

664
00:37:19,160 --> 00:37:21,160
Speaker 1: a lot of times, you know what I'm saying to

665
00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:24,560
Speaker 1: our partners. So I just don't know where the narrative

666
00:37:24,600 --> 00:37:27,719
Speaker 1: comes from that black women don't build with black men.

667
00:37:27,880 --> 00:37:29,920
Speaker 1: I just don't know where the fuck that came from.

668
00:37:30,080 --> 00:37:33,239
Speaker 1: If there's a lot of women who stopped, Okay, we

669
00:37:33,360 --> 00:37:37,200
Speaker 1: only concerned about ourselves now mm hmm, But there are

670
00:37:37,280 --> 00:37:39,400
Speaker 1: a lot of women out here who still.

671
00:37:43,239 --> 00:37:46,080
Speaker 3: I think it's okay. I you know, I'm definitely open

672
00:37:46,120 --> 00:37:47,880
Speaker 3: to it. I would definitely want to build with a

673
00:37:47,920 --> 00:37:51,120
Speaker 3: black man. I want to create legacy and build something.

674
00:37:51,480 --> 00:37:53,720
Speaker 3: I just don't It has to be a healthy balance

675
00:37:53,719 --> 00:37:57,239
Speaker 3: where I'm not lost in the sauce, you know, where

676
00:37:57,280 --> 00:37:59,840
Speaker 3: I'm so overcome with your goals and dreams that I

677
00:38:00,000 --> 00:38:03,239
Speaker 3: forget my own. That's what I'm afraid of. You know

678
00:38:03,360 --> 00:38:06,239
Speaker 3: that also happens with women who become mothers. You know,

679
00:38:07,000 --> 00:38:12,080
Speaker 3: they get so caught up in being a good mom

680
00:38:12,719 --> 00:38:14,080
Speaker 3: that they forget themselves.

681
00:38:15,640 --> 00:38:18,759
Speaker 1: I think what most women are looking for is just reciprocity.

682
00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:20,560
Speaker 1: Like you know what I'm saying. We just wanted to

683
00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:23,200
Speaker 1: be reciprocal. If I do a few, you do for me, Like,

684
00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:24,880
Speaker 1: why can it not be like that? It's like a

685
00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:27,720
Speaker 1: lot of men are looking for therapists and they're also

686
00:38:27,760 --> 00:38:31,719
Speaker 1: looking for a secretary get somebody to do busy work

687
00:38:31,760 --> 00:38:33,600
Speaker 1: for them, things that they don't feel like doing, even

688
00:38:33,600 --> 00:38:35,600
Speaker 1: when you already have a whole plate full of shit

689
00:38:36,760 --> 00:38:39,200
Speaker 1: as an adult to do, you know, because let's not

690
00:38:39,239 --> 00:38:44,560
Speaker 1: forget we work also we do shit. And then now

691
00:38:44,600 --> 00:38:50,480
Speaker 1: it comes to Robin played by Leila Rashwan. So she

692
00:38:50,600 --> 00:38:53,160
Speaker 1: just has all these like casual relationships and shit. I

693
00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:58,160
Speaker 1: think she has a problem like establishing what her self

694
00:38:58,160 --> 00:39:02,799
Speaker 1: worth actually is and it comes out in promiscuity. Right,

695
00:39:03,160 --> 00:39:05,520
Speaker 1: So I think nearing the end of the movie you

696
00:39:05,600 --> 00:39:08,319
Speaker 1: kind of see where she just I'm done with this shit.

697
00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:09,400
Speaker 1: I might to be by myself.

698
00:39:12,760 --> 00:39:14,560
Speaker 3: She just wanted to be love and she was a

699
00:39:14,560 --> 00:39:15,960
Speaker 3: bit naive too.

700
00:39:18,840 --> 00:39:25,719
Speaker 1: You think he's sole about wallet, Yes, bitch, yes, it's

701
00:39:25,800 --> 00:39:27,880
Speaker 1: like that bigga stole three to five dollars out my

702
00:39:28,000 --> 00:39:30,040
Speaker 1: damn poker book while he was giving me some head,

703
00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:31,040
Speaker 1: same shit.

704
00:39:31,600 --> 00:39:34,840
Speaker 3: Enjoying their little life while you care, girlfriend. What a

705
00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:39,040
Speaker 3: low life while you care girlfriend? And see it's the

706
00:39:39,239 --> 00:39:40,960
Speaker 3: it's the characters like Robin.

707
00:39:41,160 --> 00:39:44,319
Speaker 1: Right. She she actually, you know what, expressed how she

708
00:39:44,360 --> 00:39:46,520
Speaker 1: wanted a relationship, how she wanted to be loved. Now

709
00:39:46,520 --> 00:39:49,920
Speaker 1: we got the whole fucking nigga culture out here now.

710
00:39:49,960 --> 00:39:53,440
Speaker 1: But y'all are having kids for these men, right, y'all

711
00:39:53,480 --> 00:39:56,319
Speaker 1: too want to be loved. That's really what women want.

712
00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:59,600
Speaker 1: So while you out here, yeah, so why are you

713
00:39:59,640 --> 00:40:01,799
Speaker 1: out here saying? You know you're doing it for me?

714
00:40:02,239 --> 00:40:04,200
Speaker 1: You fucking all these niggas for you? You sure?

715
00:40:04,880 --> 00:40:05,040
Speaker 3: Right?

716
00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:08,040
Speaker 1: Are you really sure? You know what I'm saying? Like, Yeah,

717
00:40:08,080 --> 00:40:13,560
Speaker 1: I'm all for a woman empowerment and you know, being

718
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:15,640
Speaker 1: able to do whatever you want to do with your huha.

719
00:40:15,640 --> 00:40:19,320
Speaker 1: That is absolutely fine. But let's go back to earlier

720
00:40:19,480 --> 00:40:23,040
Speaker 1: we talked back HOWE doesn't heal period?

721
00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:27,040
Speaker 3: Okay, I listen everybody that I got, I take it

722
00:40:27,080 --> 00:40:29,000
Speaker 3: back right now, every single one of us.

723
00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:33,040
Speaker 1: You hear me. I feel like, who the fuck would

724
00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:38,520
Speaker 1: I keep on the rgenda? Like nobody, nobody, you know

725
00:40:38,520 --> 00:40:40,439
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. I don't feel like I missed out

726
00:40:40,480 --> 00:40:47,359
Speaker 1: on anybody I ever been with, period, And I could

727
00:40:47,360 --> 00:40:49,359
Speaker 1: still get the niggas back if I wanted.

728
00:40:49,080 --> 00:40:51,960
Speaker 3: To listen and not saying that everybody was just awful

729
00:40:52,040 --> 00:40:55,000
Speaker 3: human beings. It just was a waste of agenda. So

730
00:40:55,200 --> 00:40:59,600
Speaker 3: waste of my agenda for my agenda. All right. Then

731
00:40:59,640 --> 00:41:05,080
Speaker 3: there was Gloria Gloria was one of my favorite characters

732
00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:09,080
Speaker 3: because such a mama. She's such a mama bear, not

733
00:41:09,280 --> 00:41:14,359
Speaker 3: just to her son but to all of them. Seem

734
00:41:14,480 --> 00:41:17,680
Speaker 3: like right, yeah, And.

735
00:41:18,560 --> 00:41:20,600
Speaker 1: She liked the senior friend. I don't know if she

736
00:41:20,680 --> 00:41:22,120
Speaker 1: was on the same age with them or not, but

737
00:41:22,280 --> 00:41:24,799
Speaker 1: she just always seems so much older than any role

738
00:41:24,880 --> 00:41:26,800
Speaker 1: she plays Loretta divine.

739
00:41:27,000 --> 00:41:30,440
Speaker 3: But I think once you become a mama, sometimes happens

740
00:41:30,480 --> 00:41:33,640
Speaker 3: to you. You already just that role happens where you

741
00:41:33,719 --> 00:41:36,480
Speaker 3: just kind of calm down, become the mama bear for everybody.

742
00:41:36,520 --> 00:41:38,920
Speaker 3: Sometimes you out here with kids.

743
00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:42,360
Speaker 1: And she had the oldest well between her and Bernardine,

744
00:41:42,440 --> 00:41:44,560
Speaker 1: I think they were only two with kids and her

745
00:41:44,680 --> 00:41:47,120
Speaker 1: son was older. So that, you know, lead us to

746
00:41:47,160 --> 00:41:50,440
Speaker 1: believe that she got probably married young, had the child,

747
00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:53,160
Speaker 1: and now she's fine in love later on in.

748
00:41:53,120 --> 00:41:56,920
Speaker 3: Life, right, And then having her ex, the person that

749
00:41:57,000 --> 00:42:01,480
Speaker 3: she you know, looks too for Roman tell her that

750
00:42:01,520 --> 00:42:05,640
Speaker 3: he's now gay. On that part, she was like, you

751
00:42:05,640 --> 00:42:07,400
Speaker 3: don't have to pretend to be You don't got to

752
00:42:07,400 --> 00:42:11,360
Speaker 3: do all of that, nigga. You know, I'm not joking,

753
00:42:11,440 --> 00:42:14,520
Speaker 3: It's is serious. You know, I've been bisexual for a

754
00:42:14,560 --> 00:42:16,080
Speaker 3: long time. And now fully gay.

755
00:42:17,440 --> 00:42:22,160
Speaker 1: I forgot about that part, bitch. That is definitely some

756
00:42:22,840 --> 00:42:24,399
Speaker 1: nowadays type shit.

757
00:42:24,760 --> 00:42:27,759
Speaker 3: Mm hmm. That is so current, that's very current. It

758
00:42:27,840 --> 00:42:29,800
Speaker 3: was ahead of his time, actually.

759
00:42:30,040 --> 00:42:33,440
Speaker 1: But at least he was honest, you know, That's that

760
00:42:33,480 --> 00:42:36,920
Speaker 1: doesn't happen often nowadays. We find out in the clinic,

761
00:42:37,520 --> 00:42:39,839
Speaker 1: we find out from the from the men.

762
00:42:40,239 --> 00:42:43,040
Speaker 3: But you know, honestly, a lot of these women today,

763
00:42:43,120 --> 00:42:45,880
Speaker 3: I won't say a lot, but some, especially younger women,

764
00:42:45,920 --> 00:42:48,840
Speaker 3: are preferring that they man be bisexual or gay. What

765
00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:52,319
Speaker 3: it was Doci saying, like a red flag is a

766
00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:55,279
Speaker 3: straight man. She was being I hope she was being

767
00:42:55,320 --> 00:42:56,960
Speaker 3: sarcastic and not. I don't know.

768
00:42:58,239 --> 00:43:00,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, But even in that case, right, even though you

769
00:43:00,480 --> 00:43:03,360
Speaker 1: have women out here who are openly like accepting to

770
00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:06,279
Speaker 1: that type of situation, you still have the men being

771
00:43:06,280 --> 00:43:09,839
Speaker 1: deceitful because I think they get off on being sneaky.

772
00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:12,399
Speaker 1: You know, they still go after the women who are

773
00:43:12,400 --> 00:43:18,400
Speaker 1: okay with you. I'd be telling the truth, I'd be

774
00:43:18,440 --> 00:43:20,680
Speaker 1: telling the truth. I'm not being hard on them. These

775
00:43:20,680 --> 00:43:23,879
Speaker 1: are like the hard facts HIV and I'm listen, I'm

776
00:43:23,920 --> 00:43:26,160
Speaker 1: not trying to put that stigma on gay men. But

777
00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:32,200
Speaker 1: the statistic show. I saw some data that said seventy

778
00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:36,480
Speaker 1: two of trans women have HIV. That is high.

779
00:43:36,880 --> 00:43:38,399
Speaker 3: I need to see that. I don't know if that's true.

780
00:43:38,480 --> 00:43:43,200
Speaker 1: I swear to God. I swear to God my vagina.

781
00:43:43,400 --> 00:43:48,560
Speaker 3: Okay, yes, but I'm saying maybe the publication was reporting

782
00:43:48,640 --> 00:43:52,719
Speaker 3: some some things that might be not factual to promote,

783
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:54,680
Speaker 3: like trans hate or something.

784
00:43:55,320 --> 00:43:57,560
Speaker 1: No, I don't think so. I think that ud. You

785
00:43:57,600 --> 00:43:59,320
Speaker 1: read that book back in the day, the d O

786
00:43:59,640 --> 00:44:00,680
Speaker 1: bro Dl brother.

787
00:44:01,080 --> 00:44:02,840
Speaker 3: Did you read that book? Dog?

788
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:05,960
Speaker 1: That shit was so eye opening? Another other shit I

789
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:08,440
Speaker 1: should probably not have been reading in twelfth grade problem,

790
00:44:08,560 --> 00:44:12,319
Speaker 1: I mean, why not? But was it that long ago?

791
00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:14,439
Speaker 1: I might have been in college at the time when

792
00:44:14,440 --> 00:44:19,320
Speaker 1: that book came out. But this is a supposed heterosexual

793
00:44:19,360 --> 00:44:23,200
Speaker 1: man who's now out right, and then he's talking about

794
00:44:23,280 --> 00:44:28,359
Speaker 1: that DL world Eric Jeron Dickie. I can't remember the guy.

795
00:44:28,400 --> 00:44:32,040
Speaker 1: I can't remember the author who wrote it ball head,

796
00:44:32,680 --> 00:44:33,759
Speaker 1: nice looking black man.

797
00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:35,920
Speaker 3: I think it might be that, but I might be wrong.

798
00:44:36,520 --> 00:44:40,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, but he he puts some stuff and now I'm like, yo,

799
00:44:40,440 --> 00:44:44,160
Speaker 1: this is fucking scary, you know, just like them not

800
00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:49,439
Speaker 1: wanting to use condoms, because then they are consciously now

801
00:44:49,480 --> 00:44:51,680
Speaker 1: you because you put that condom on, You're about to

802
00:44:51,719 --> 00:44:54,960
Speaker 1: have sex with this man. You are consciously making a

803
00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:58,800
Speaker 1: decision to have sex with a man. So they actually

804
00:44:58,880 --> 00:45:01,040
Speaker 1: were not having sex with me, because then they can

805
00:45:01,120 --> 00:45:03,560
Speaker 1: pretend like, I don't know, it's just like some old

806
00:45:04,040 --> 00:45:08,040
Speaker 1: out of body shit like it wasn't me, it was

807
00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:13,719
Speaker 1: the ship was deep. Okay, it was too deep, man.

808
00:45:13,760 --> 00:45:18,160
Speaker 1: I'm telling you, so who do you more? Who do

809
00:45:18,280 --> 00:45:18,800
Speaker 1: you more?

810
00:45:19,680 --> 00:45:21,400
Speaker 3: That's what I was about to ask you, Like which

811
00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:24,120
Speaker 3: one of you? If I had to identify with a

812
00:45:24,280 --> 00:45:27,719
Speaker 3: character most, I feel like I'm a hybrid. First of all,

813
00:45:27,719 --> 00:45:29,600
Speaker 3: there's a little bit of me and every one of

814
00:45:29,640 --> 00:45:34,080
Speaker 3: these characters can identify with all in certain ways. But

815
00:45:34,239 --> 00:45:36,040
Speaker 3: if I had to, it's not for Gloria because we

816
00:45:36,040 --> 00:45:40,120
Speaker 3: meant no kids for real. I guess no. But I

817
00:45:40,160 --> 00:45:43,799
Speaker 3: can't identify with being selfish. She's selfish with her son.

818
00:45:43,880 --> 00:45:45,960
Speaker 3: She wanted him to stay home, she didn't want him

819
00:45:45,960 --> 00:45:50,080
Speaker 3: to go out for New Year's Eve. You know, she

820
00:45:50,239 --> 00:45:53,080
Speaker 3: was always on him. You know, I can identify with

821
00:45:53,160 --> 00:45:55,400
Speaker 3: that because I can be like that, you know. But

822
00:45:56,280 --> 00:46:02,279
Speaker 3: I would have to say Robin and Savannah mostly being

823
00:46:03,080 --> 00:46:08,360
Speaker 3: gold driven and you know, want in love and trying

824
00:46:08,400 --> 00:46:12,840
Speaker 3: not to reconcile my career, my ambitions for a relationship,

825
00:46:12,920 --> 00:46:17,160
Speaker 3: but still wanting those things. And then Robin sometimes being

826
00:46:17,840 --> 00:46:20,719
Speaker 3: I know, I can be a hopeless romantic and be

827
00:46:20,920 --> 00:46:25,879
Speaker 3: a bit naive and try to like see everything through

828
00:46:25,960 --> 00:46:29,160
Speaker 3: rose colored glasses into instead of seeing things for what

829
00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:32,640
Speaker 3: they really are sometimes because it's just better to like

830
00:46:32,719 --> 00:46:34,840
Speaker 3: be in this fairy tale than to be in a reality.

831
00:46:36,440 --> 00:46:39,520
Speaker 3: I definitely can identify with Robin with that now, with

832
00:46:39,680 --> 00:46:44,040
Speaker 3: that stealing money out my purse. Oh no, that's where

833
00:46:44,040 --> 00:46:47,000
Speaker 3: I dont lie. You know, I lost your minds them.

834
00:46:47,040 --> 00:46:50,360
Speaker 1: I definitely think I'm a hybrid between Savannah and Robin

835
00:46:50,560 --> 00:46:53,600
Speaker 1: as well, with a little dash of Bernardine because I

836
00:46:53,600 --> 00:46:57,120
Speaker 1: won't help a nigga build some shit, right. I think

837
00:46:57,160 --> 00:47:01,040
Speaker 1: I'm more Savannah when I'm in a relationship gun and

838
00:47:01,080 --> 00:47:05,280
Speaker 1: I'm more Robbing when I'm single, because when I'm single,

839
00:47:05,320 --> 00:47:07,120
Speaker 1: I give myself a mission to do all the things.

840
00:47:07,160 --> 00:47:10,800
Speaker 1: But I am simultaneously looking for love, like I'm looking

841
00:47:10,840 --> 00:47:16,200
Speaker 1: for another relationship. May not be consciously looking, and things

842
00:47:16,280 --> 00:47:18,600
Speaker 1: might just happen, but I and I already kind of

843
00:47:18,640 --> 00:47:20,400
Speaker 1: be knowing, like where I want to go at next too.

844
00:47:21,680 --> 00:47:22,759
Speaker 3: Yeah, I bet I know you.

845
00:47:26,040 --> 00:47:28,120
Speaker 1: But look, this is the first time in life I'm

846
00:47:28,160 --> 00:47:31,160
Speaker 1: really like, you know, if this current relationship doesn't work out,

847
00:47:31,719 --> 00:47:34,719
Speaker 1: I'm cool. I swear. That's where I'm at, Like, I'm

848
00:47:34,760 --> 00:47:38,480
Speaker 1: really cool on you know. If something happens, something happens.

849
00:47:38,520 --> 00:47:42,680
Speaker 1: If it doesn't, it doesn't, I'm not actively This shit

850
00:47:42,800 --> 00:47:46,040
Speaker 1: is not easy, dog, Okay, it's not easy.

851
00:47:47,640 --> 00:47:49,200
Speaker 3: It's not so.

852
00:47:49,480 --> 00:47:51,279
Speaker 1: I mean, I feel like this would be my last

853
00:47:51,320 --> 00:47:55,160
Speaker 1: relationship honestly that I would like actively be trying to pursue.

854
00:47:56,360 --> 00:47:57,160
Speaker 1: I don't give a fuck.

855
00:47:57,200 --> 00:47:57,960
Speaker 3: I don't believe that.

856
00:47:58,560 --> 00:48:01,280
Speaker 1: I swear to God, girl, you is the love of girl.

857
00:48:01,440 --> 00:48:02,560
Speaker 3: The fuck you talk about?

858
00:48:06,800 --> 00:48:09,560
Speaker 1: You know, life is this life, especially in America, it's

859
00:48:09,560 --> 00:48:12,320
Speaker 1: just based off of double occupancy. You are not supposed

860
00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:15,040
Speaker 1: to be out here trying to do it by yourself. Okay,

861
00:48:15,800 --> 00:48:18,160
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. So I have always been

862
00:48:18,200 --> 00:48:22,719
Speaker 1: looking for a teammate, a real life teammate, and I

863
00:48:22,880 --> 00:48:24,840
Speaker 1: just never got that for real. Out of any of

864
00:48:24,880 --> 00:48:27,319
Speaker 1: my partners. The closest I got to it was was

865
00:48:27,320 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 1: the guy I was going to marry, but he was

866
00:48:32,080 --> 00:48:34,000
Speaker 1: just not a good manager. You know, these niggas want

867
00:48:34,000 --> 00:48:36,080
Speaker 1: to lead, like you, you are not a good manager.

868
00:48:36,120 --> 00:48:37,960
Speaker 1: Your fucking employees be trying to get the fuck from

869
00:48:37,960 --> 00:48:41,040
Speaker 1: around you too, Like you're just not a good manager.

870
00:48:41,520 --> 00:48:43,640
Speaker 1: So I am somebody who could be led if you

871
00:48:43,719 --> 00:48:46,399
Speaker 1: leading me in the right direction. And I also want

872
00:48:46,400 --> 00:48:48,040
Speaker 1: somebody who can be led, like I want to be

873
00:48:48,040 --> 00:48:50,880
Speaker 1: able to teach and be taught. That's what I would

874
00:48:50,880 --> 00:48:51,799
Speaker 1: like in a relationship.

875
00:48:53,200 --> 00:48:56,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's fair. I definitely want somebody to steer the ship.

876
00:48:56,400 --> 00:48:57,839
Speaker 3: I don't want to be in charge.

877
00:48:57,880 --> 00:49:01,120
Speaker 1: You say that until it happens. Girl, That's exactly what

878
00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:05,480
Speaker 1: I tell my mom, Like my stepdaddy is made for you. Okay,

879
00:49:05,680 --> 00:49:09,560
Speaker 1: you think you want a strong man, you're not gonna

880
00:49:09,560 --> 00:49:12,160
Speaker 1: be able to do the type of ship to them

881
00:49:12,320 --> 00:49:12,960
Speaker 1: that you think.

882
00:49:13,120 --> 00:49:15,399
Speaker 3: I don't want to do the type of ship. I

883
00:49:15,480 --> 00:49:18,239
Speaker 3: want someone. I've been the captain of this ship for

884
00:49:18,280 --> 00:49:20,160
Speaker 3: a long time. I want somebody to come and steer.

885
00:49:20,239 --> 00:49:21,919
Speaker 3: I want someone that I could be like, I trust

886
00:49:22,040 --> 00:49:25,200
Speaker 3: him to make good decisions. Now, I don't want like

887
00:49:25,480 --> 00:49:27,680
Speaker 3: a dictator. I don't want to like.

888
00:49:29,320 --> 00:49:32,040
Speaker 1: It's a thin line, like for real, Like it's just

889
00:49:33,280 --> 00:49:35,320
Speaker 1: I just haven't been able to find that sweet spot,

890
00:49:35,480 --> 00:49:38,680
Speaker 1: like the middle ground. Yeah, it's either they leaning on

891
00:49:38,760 --> 00:49:42,640
Speaker 1: you too much or they bullying you. Like the fuck,

892
00:49:43,880 --> 00:49:45,040
Speaker 1: where is the sweet spot?

893
00:49:45,080 --> 00:49:46,920
Speaker 3: That's what I want, the sweet spot. Someone who can

894
00:49:46,920 --> 00:49:52,640
Speaker 3: trust my counsel, but you know, has a good uh

895
00:49:52,920 --> 00:49:57,920
Speaker 3: a good decision maker, you know. Yeah, yeah, that's what

896
00:49:57,960 --> 00:50:04,359
Speaker 3: I would like. One thing I want to say is

897
00:50:04,400 --> 00:50:07,160
Speaker 3: that I can appreciate from this movie is because they

898
00:50:07,200 --> 00:50:10,760
Speaker 3: had some fucked up scenarios going on, but it wasn't

899
00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:15,319
Speaker 3: no judgment amongst them. Like, there wasn't out there just

900
00:50:15,719 --> 00:50:19,680
Speaker 3: harshly judging each other. And we didn't see them talking

901
00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:23,239
Speaker 3: talking about each other behind their back and see none

902
00:50:23,239 --> 00:50:26,400
Speaker 3: of that you ladies, y'all be doing that to y'all friends,

903
00:50:26,719 --> 00:50:27,480
Speaker 3: y'all been a job.

904
00:50:29,520 --> 00:50:31,840
Speaker 1: So let's just get into like that. Then let's just

905
00:50:31,880 --> 00:50:35,080
Speaker 1: get into like how important, like the like just the

906
00:50:35,160 --> 00:50:37,520
Speaker 1: power of female friendships are because you got a lot

907
00:50:37,520 --> 00:50:41,480
Speaker 1: of women out here to be like I just got homeboys,

908
00:50:41,520 --> 00:50:42,920
Speaker 1: like girl, get you're ugly.

909
00:50:43,120 --> 00:50:47,520
Speaker 3: Right, female friends. That's a red flag for me because

910
00:50:47,560 --> 00:50:50,520
Speaker 3: how you don't have no sisters. I love my girls,

911
00:50:50,600 --> 00:50:54,920
Speaker 3: I love you. You know, I want us to be great.

912
00:50:55,320 --> 00:50:59,759
Speaker 3: I I you know, I ain't gonna sit here a

913
00:50:59,760 --> 00:51:03,799
Speaker 3: lot I have talked shit like I would be like.

914
00:51:03,960 --> 00:51:05,680
Speaker 1: It ain't shit. You ain't gonna talk to them too,

915
00:51:05,680 --> 00:51:07,040
Speaker 1: that you wouldn't talk to them?

916
00:51:07,200 --> 00:51:10,080
Speaker 3: No, probably I already talked to them, and now I'm

917
00:51:10,120 --> 00:51:13,200
Speaker 3: vitting to somebody else. Why we argue about the ship.

918
00:51:13,280 --> 00:51:15,040
Speaker 3: I said, now one thing I'm gonna do. I'm gonna

919
00:51:15,080 --> 00:51:16,759
Speaker 3: say what I'm gonna say. Now, you know, I don't

920
00:51:16,760 --> 00:51:19,719
Speaker 3: really like throw the rock and hote my hand type

921
00:51:19,719 --> 00:51:21,600
Speaker 3: of girl. I'm gonna definitely say what I Yeah, I

922
00:51:21,640 --> 00:51:24,920
Speaker 3: said that, Yeah, I said it. I said to you first,

923
00:51:25,239 --> 00:51:27,520
Speaker 3: you know, like you know, so you don't have to

924
00:51:27,600 --> 00:51:31,919
Speaker 3: question that, which is a gift and a curse too,

925
00:51:32,200 --> 00:51:34,839
Speaker 3: because sometimes shit don't need to be said to them

926
00:51:34,960 --> 00:51:36,120
Speaker 3: or nobody. You know.

927
00:51:37,800 --> 00:51:42,960
Speaker 1: See you have a friend group where everybody is like

928
00:51:43,000 --> 00:51:46,040
Speaker 1: a bunch of people in the friend group, right See,

929
00:51:46,120 --> 00:51:48,680
Speaker 1: I don't really have that anymore. It's like it's splintered now.

930
00:51:49,040 --> 00:51:51,359
Speaker 1: So I got like friends from high school. I got

931
00:51:51,360 --> 00:51:53,520
Speaker 1: my best friend from high school, and then I have

932
00:51:53,960 --> 00:51:56,680
Speaker 1: my couple friends from college who not like there was

933
00:51:56,719 --> 00:51:59,400
Speaker 1: a group, right but some are gone and then some

934
00:51:59,520 --> 00:52:01,799
Speaker 1: still here that I still communicate with. Where we don't

935
00:52:01,800 --> 00:52:04,360
Speaker 1: communicate with the other people that's out the group, you

936
00:52:04,400 --> 00:52:06,160
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. So it's kind of splintered my

937
00:52:06,239 --> 00:52:08,839
Speaker 1: friend my friend groups. But then I have like one

938
00:52:08,920 --> 00:52:11,160
Speaker 1: off people like my homegirl Killer who I met when

939
00:52:11,160 --> 00:52:14,680
Speaker 1: I lived in Saint Louis, Like she know everybody fucking business,

940
00:52:15,040 --> 00:52:17,480
Speaker 1: but I don't necessarily tell people her business, you know

941
00:52:17,600 --> 00:52:19,399
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, Like, because these people ain't gonna never

942
00:52:19,440 --> 00:52:21,919
Speaker 1: meet no way. So if I'm vtting about some shit

943
00:52:22,040 --> 00:52:25,120
Speaker 1: that a friend from this other friend group did, like

944
00:52:25,440 --> 00:52:27,759
Speaker 1: there would be no reason for Kayla to ever give

945
00:52:27,800 --> 00:52:30,080
Speaker 1: me this to this person. Yeah, you know what I'm saying.

946
00:52:30,120 --> 00:52:35,960
Speaker 1: So I never like talking shit with roommate. Yes, I

947
00:52:36,000 --> 00:52:38,560
Speaker 1: don't really have a friend group to talk shit about

948
00:52:38,560 --> 00:52:42,279
Speaker 1: a friend then where everybody knows that person. Yeah, you

949
00:52:42,320 --> 00:52:43,759
Speaker 1: see what I'm saying, And.

950
00:52:43,840 --> 00:52:47,520
Speaker 3: That can become a problem. It can become a big

951
00:52:47,560 --> 00:52:49,959
Speaker 3: problem when you have like a friend group and y'all

952
00:52:50,040 --> 00:52:52,719
Speaker 3: vent to each other about shit with each other. I've

953
00:52:52,760 --> 00:52:53,080
Speaker 3: seen that.

954
00:52:53,239 --> 00:52:55,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, so that is a that is a plus.

955
00:52:56,080 --> 00:52:57,600
Speaker 1: That is the thing that we saw on the show

956
00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:00,680
Speaker 1: where black women were really showing up for each other

957
00:53:00,680 --> 00:53:02,840
Speaker 1: in her real way and not beating each other backs

958
00:53:02,880 --> 00:53:05,640
Speaker 1: and on the lower because even need that.

959
00:53:05,880 --> 00:53:10,840
Speaker 3: Even the scene when Gloria, Loretta Devine and Savannah Whitney

960
00:53:10,880 --> 00:53:15,120
Speaker 3: Houston were on the ferris wheel and she was like,

961
00:53:15,920 --> 00:53:19,359
Speaker 3: can I ask you a question? She was like, did

962
00:53:19,400 --> 00:53:25,239
Speaker 3: you get with Herbert? She was like, I needed to

963
00:53:25,239 --> 00:53:28,920
Speaker 3: get late, so I did. She's like, now he come

964
00:53:28,960 --> 00:53:32,400
Speaker 3: into my house calling all times to night, like Herbert wanted.

965
00:53:32,200 --> 00:53:33,560
Speaker 1: That pussy again bad.

966
00:53:35,160 --> 00:53:40,719
Speaker 3: But Gloria definitely was disappointed in her, but she didn't

967
00:53:41,040 --> 00:53:44,920
Speaker 3: treat her poorly or call her a hole or beat

968
00:53:44,960 --> 00:53:47,239
Speaker 3: her down. Ask her friend, and y'all do that to

969
00:53:47,320 --> 00:53:50,880
Speaker 3: each other. You gotta start.

970
00:53:51,960 --> 00:53:54,319
Speaker 1: And I mean, as a woman, I just don't know

971
00:53:54,360 --> 00:53:58,560
Speaker 1: how you get through life without like just some type

972
00:53:58,560 --> 00:54:01,000
Speaker 1: of support system from other women. You know what I'm saying.

973
00:54:01,000 --> 00:54:03,399
Speaker 1: We all be going through some of the same similar shit.

974
00:54:03,440 --> 00:54:06,480
Speaker 1: I remember my homegirl when I left my ex, like

975
00:54:06,560 --> 00:54:09,799
Speaker 1: she had left hers first. She left her dude first, right,

976
00:54:10,200 --> 00:54:15,640
Speaker 1: so it's like we were like bonding over these narks essentially, right,

977
00:54:16,680 --> 00:54:18,799
Speaker 1: she left hers. I left mine for real and I

978
00:54:18,880 --> 00:54:20,839
Speaker 1: was done. I was fucking done. But she went back.

979
00:54:20,880 --> 00:54:23,480
Speaker 1: I'm like, bitch, wit you breaking the cold? What happened?

980
00:54:24,000 --> 00:54:26,319
Speaker 1: You know? But I still supported her and going back,

981
00:54:26,360 --> 00:54:28,480
Speaker 1: and I still you know when she had had still

982
00:54:29,040 --> 00:54:31,439
Speaker 1: ongoing bullshit with this person that she was still because

983
00:54:31,440 --> 00:54:33,520
Speaker 1: they were married, so it was a little bit different, right,

984
00:54:33,560 --> 00:54:35,760
Speaker 1: I didn't get to the marriage stage. She was actually

985
00:54:35,760 --> 00:54:38,239
Speaker 1: married to this person, right, so you know, I was

986
00:54:38,280 --> 00:54:40,239
Speaker 1: still listening to her when she was going through all

987
00:54:40,239 --> 00:54:43,600
Speaker 1: the things. Never judged her, none of that shit. Like, girl,

988
00:54:43,719 --> 00:54:46,560
Speaker 1: I understand, I get it, I understand it. But in

989
00:54:46,560 --> 00:54:47,919
Speaker 1: the back of my mind, I'm like, what the fuck

990
00:54:47,960 --> 00:54:50,400
Speaker 1: did you go back? It wasn't gonna be any different.

991
00:54:50,600 --> 00:54:52,960
Speaker 1: I really don't think people change much when you get

992
00:54:53,080 --> 00:54:55,400
Speaker 1: to a certain age. So you know what I'm saying, Like,

993
00:54:55,440 --> 00:54:57,000
Speaker 1: if you change, it's not gonna be for you, it's

994
00:54:57,000 --> 00:54:59,200
Speaker 1: gonna be for the next woman, right.

995
00:54:59,080 --> 00:55:01,440
Speaker 3: Were the same person, they may not change. Yeah.

996
00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:04,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, So we want to know from y'all, like tell

997
00:55:04,560 --> 00:55:07,120
Speaker 1: us the time, like where one of your homegirls like

998
00:55:07,200 --> 00:55:09,239
Speaker 1: have helped you through a really tough time. They don't

999
00:55:09,239 --> 00:55:12,680
Speaker 1: even have to be about relationships with a man or

1000
00:55:12,840 --> 00:55:18,560
Speaker 1: a woman whatever, because you know, y'all, y'all motherfuckers is gay.

1001
00:55:18,880 --> 00:55:25,000
Speaker 1: I know anything. I know it's fun. It's fun because

1002
00:55:25,040 --> 00:55:29,439
Speaker 1: I just be playing that's right. But yeah, so which

1003
00:55:29,520 --> 00:55:32,000
Speaker 1: friend do you think you are and your friend group?

1004
00:55:32,080 --> 00:55:33,600
Speaker 1: Based on these characters?

1005
00:55:34,040 --> 00:55:40,040
Speaker 3: Which friend do I think I am? Yeah, I'm definitely Gloria.

1006
00:55:41,480 --> 00:55:43,200
Speaker 3: As a friend, I'm definitely Gloria.

1007
00:55:44,880 --> 00:55:47,080
Speaker 1: Oh and I'm Robin because I'll be ready to like

1008
00:55:47,160 --> 00:55:49,160
Speaker 1: call this ain't John bitch.

1009
00:55:49,520 --> 00:55:51,719
Speaker 3: I'll be definitely the one on the phone. Cut some

1010
00:55:51,800 --> 00:55:54,320
Speaker 3: motherfucker out by my friend. Put me on the phone,

1011
00:55:54,360 --> 00:55:57,960
Speaker 3: give me the phone. I'm so I'm robbing in that way.

1012
00:55:58,120 --> 00:56:00,920
Speaker 3: But I'm definitely Gloria in the I can be like

1013
00:56:01,160 --> 00:56:03,920
Speaker 3: very nurturing and I get real motherly on my friends.

1014
00:56:03,920 --> 00:56:07,239
Speaker 3: Come lay on my shoulder. Here's my shoulder. We're gonna

1015
00:56:07,239 --> 00:56:08,960
Speaker 3: get through this together. I love you and I'm gonna

1016
00:56:08,960 --> 00:56:12,719
Speaker 3: support you hugely and you're gonna feel it. So I

1017
00:56:12,760 --> 00:56:14,280
Speaker 3: think i'm that too.

1018
00:56:14,880 --> 00:56:19,720
Speaker 1: I think I'm Bernardine and Robin. I just like how

1019
00:56:19,800 --> 00:56:23,080
Speaker 1: angry Bernardine was, Like that's high being when I get

1020
00:56:23,080 --> 00:56:26,520
Speaker 1: to level ten for real, like you said, as a friend, Yeah,

1021
00:56:26,560 --> 00:56:29,960
Speaker 1: I know, as I'm just thinking about, like, yeah, still

1022
00:56:30,160 --> 00:56:35,520
Speaker 1: bitch as a friend, but Bernadine got angry as a friend,

1023
00:56:35,560 --> 00:56:39,600
Speaker 1: I ain't see that. I will get angry and blow

1024
00:56:39,680 --> 00:56:47,600
Speaker 1: up my friend. Car up, I'm just playing you ain't bitch, No,

1025
00:56:47,719 --> 00:56:48,160
Speaker 1: I don't know.

1026
00:56:49,440 --> 00:56:49,840
Speaker 3: I don't know.

1027
00:56:49,880 --> 00:56:54,759
Speaker 1: I think that for whatever reason, I feel like I

1028
00:56:54,840 --> 00:56:59,479
Speaker 1: probably possess all these women, you know what I'm saying,

1029
00:56:59,680 --> 00:57:03,840
Speaker 1: and some type of ways. As a friend, would I

1030
00:57:03,880 --> 00:57:06,120
Speaker 1: be asking Gloria like did you fuck that nigga? And

1031
00:57:06,480 --> 00:57:09,920
Speaker 1: absolutely I'm the friend that keeps tally of the niggas

1032
00:57:09,920 --> 00:57:12,799
Speaker 1: you've had sex with. So when you forget and act

1033
00:57:12,840 --> 00:57:14,719
Speaker 1: like you ain't ever cheat on your nigga, I'm like, bitch,

1034
00:57:14,760 --> 00:57:16,880
Speaker 1: you remember. See that's what I don't tell you all

1035
00:57:16,880 --> 00:57:21,080
Speaker 1: about whole facts right there? Girls, I'd be like I

1036
00:57:21,240 --> 00:57:25,160
Speaker 1: telling y'all listen, I got a home. Girl ass just

1037
00:57:25,240 --> 00:57:27,720
Speaker 1: be lying to me like, which, I know you our

1038
00:57:27,760 --> 00:57:28,440
Speaker 1: whole lives?

1039
00:57:28,520 --> 00:57:32,080
Speaker 3: Like, girl, shut up, I forgot.

1040
00:57:33,640 --> 00:57:35,680
Speaker 1: And here I am going through my notes on my

1041
00:57:35,720 --> 00:57:45,080
Speaker 1: phone up phone on January twenty nineteen, girl, and with

1042
00:57:45,200 --> 00:57:49,280
Speaker 1: my whole whole facts. I'm not friend, okay, In case

1043
00:57:49,320 --> 00:57:55,919
Speaker 1: you forgot, I'm your whole facts, your whole fact checker. Yes,

1044
00:57:56,000 --> 00:57:58,040
Speaker 1: I think I probably am. I'm probably all of them

1045
00:57:58,200 --> 00:58:01,440
Speaker 1: wrapped up in one. I'm gonna be nurturing you know what,

1046
00:58:01,440 --> 00:58:06,360
Speaker 1: I'm saying, like like Gloria is could be serious, like Savannah,

1047
00:58:07,080 --> 00:58:09,720
Speaker 1: I could be ditsy like a Robin, you know what

1048
00:58:09,720 --> 00:58:11,720
Speaker 1: I'm saying, not knowing what the fuck is going on,

1049
00:58:12,000 --> 00:58:13,160
Speaker 1: but not so much.

1050
00:58:13,440 --> 00:58:15,920
Speaker 3: But ready to turn up. Robin be the one that's

1051
00:58:16,480 --> 00:58:20,280
Speaker 3: that's me. And but you like, don't do that, y'all,

1052
00:58:20,320 --> 00:58:23,280
Speaker 3: like it's not worth it. So I guess you know,

1053
00:58:24,320 --> 00:58:26,120
Speaker 3: it's a little bit of every character in us.

1054
00:58:26,120 --> 00:58:29,920
Speaker 1: All. Yeah, Bernadette a little sneaky, she'd be done. She

1055
00:58:30,000 --> 00:58:32,160
Speaker 1: didn't even tell her friends about it. And until somebody

1056
00:58:32,200 --> 00:58:33,360
Speaker 1: asked about that, shit, that's me.

1057
00:58:33,360 --> 00:58:37,000
Speaker 3: Who are gonna tell her that nobody heard? Yeah, that's

1058
00:58:37,080 --> 00:58:37,760
Speaker 3: me a little bit.

1059
00:58:38,040 --> 00:58:42,720
Speaker 1: So I don't know. Do you think any of them

1060
00:58:42,760 --> 00:58:45,440
Speaker 1: had like some who had the most red flags as

1061
00:58:45,480 --> 00:58:50,840
Speaker 1: a woman, like you would think Robin Robin had the

1062
00:58:50,840 --> 00:58:51,760
Speaker 1: most red flags?

1063
00:58:52,320 --> 00:58:54,680
Speaker 3: What do you mean like when you say red flags?

1064
00:58:54,720 --> 00:58:57,360
Speaker 3: Like was she the most toxic or was she yeah,

1065
00:58:57,560 --> 00:58:59,880
Speaker 3: the most toxic? Shit both?

1066
00:59:00,240 --> 00:59:01,840
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Because you know, any I

1067
00:59:02,040 --> 00:59:04,160
Speaker 1: really feel like when you fuck with anybody, it's like

1068
00:59:04,200 --> 00:59:06,640
Speaker 1: a small aspect of who you are too. That's even

1069
00:59:06,640 --> 00:59:09,840
Speaker 1: with friends like me and you friends because there's a

1070
00:59:09,960 --> 00:59:12,360
Speaker 1: part of you that I'm like, you see what I'm saying.

1071
00:59:12,960 --> 00:59:15,680
Speaker 1: So even with Robin fucking these dudes like that was

1072
00:59:15,720 --> 00:59:18,760
Speaker 1: still an aspect of her, Like however they were, was

1073
00:59:18,800 --> 00:59:21,680
Speaker 1: an aspect of her. You are who you beat basically.

1074
00:59:22,600 --> 00:59:26,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know. I guess they all were equally

1075
00:59:27,400 --> 00:59:29,840
Speaker 3: toxic in their own way. I don't feel like anybody

1076
00:59:29,920 --> 00:59:32,880
Speaker 3: was more toxic than the other. And in terms of

1077
00:59:32,920 --> 00:59:36,440
Speaker 3: how they dealt with their situations, they were just women

1078
00:59:36,520 --> 00:59:37,720
Speaker 3: trying to figure it out. Man.

1079
00:59:38,360 --> 00:59:41,680
Speaker 1: So Robin, like she just always like was entertaining men

1080
00:59:41,720 --> 00:59:43,560
Speaker 1: that just weren't emotionally available.

1081
00:59:44,240 --> 00:59:48,280
Speaker 3: Yeah. Character what was his name.

1082
00:59:51,360 --> 00:59:53,280
Speaker 1: I don't know, Eric, the men the.

1083
00:59:53,320 --> 00:59:56,920
Speaker 3: Dark skinned one, she was like fat fuck.

1084
01:00:00,520 --> 01:00:02,760
Speaker 1: So. There was a Kenneth, there was a John, there

1085
01:00:02,840 --> 01:00:04,440
Speaker 1: was a Rustle, and there was a Troy.

1086
01:00:05,000 --> 01:00:08,320
Speaker 3: Troy, that's that's not Troy was the one Marvin have

1087
01:00:08,440 --> 01:00:09,640
Speaker 3: a fruit bowl, bitch.

1088
01:00:09,920 --> 01:00:10,200
Speaker 2: That was.

1089
01:00:13,440 --> 01:00:14,640
Speaker 1: A rebound disaster.

1090
01:00:15,400 --> 01:00:17,840
Speaker 3: It was the guy that worked with her that he

1091
01:00:17,960 --> 01:00:20,920
Speaker 3: was like, I own a house in Scottsdale. She's like,

1092
01:00:20,960 --> 01:00:25,080
Speaker 3: I want to go on vacations and dinner and you know,

1093
01:00:25,240 --> 01:00:27,720
Speaker 3: like I want to be happy. When she was in

1094
01:00:27,760 --> 01:00:31,160
Speaker 3: the bed with him. He was like, oh, coming him,

1095
01:00:31,680 --> 01:00:38,920
Speaker 3: what was his name? I don't remember. I don't know, yeah,

1096
01:00:39,200 --> 01:00:42,240
Speaker 3: I can't remember. But that was another time where Gloria

1097
01:00:42,360 --> 01:00:44,480
Speaker 3: was like, well, remember you broke up with him, so

1098
01:00:44,520 --> 01:00:47,560
Speaker 3: don't embarrass us and don't embarrass yourself. Just be a

1099
01:00:47,640 --> 01:00:55,520
Speaker 3: motherly yes, don't forget bitch, right, like the only one

1100
01:00:55,520 --> 01:01:01,240
Speaker 3: that was like stable and like could have taken her serious.

1101
01:01:01,360 --> 01:01:04,680
Speaker 1: But she didn't like him, you see, because she liked

1102
01:01:04,720 --> 01:01:06,720
Speaker 1: the emotionally unavailable men.

1103
01:01:07,280 --> 01:01:11,840
Speaker 3: So right, don't look at me, bitch.

1104
01:01:11,880 --> 01:01:12,200
Speaker 1: I know.

1105
01:01:14,800 --> 01:01:20,520
Speaker 3: That's why I said her in so many ways only

1106
01:01:20,640 --> 01:01:24,480
Speaker 3: except for the money part, the nigga stealing from me

1107
01:01:24,600 --> 01:01:28,040
Speaker 3: because I hold lodallar so tight, the eagle scream on

1108
01:01:28,080 --> 01:01:30,040
Speaker 3: that bitch, do not play with me by my money.

1109
01:01:30,920 --> 01:01:33,880
Speaker 1: Shame. So let's just let's quickly go through like the

1110
01:01:33,880 --> 01:01:36,080
Speaker 1: different archetypes of these men, right quick, and wrap this

1111
01:01:36,080 --> 01:01:43,600
Speaker 1: shit the fuck up. So Kenneth was the married manipulator, okay, charming,

1112
01:01:45,320 --> 01:01:50,360
Speaker 1: emotionally manipulative, and full of all the fucking empty promises.

1113
01:01:51,240 --> 01:01:53,680
Speaker 1: He even convinced, go ahead.

1114
01:01:53,400 --> 01:01:55,120
Speaker 3: I was gonna say, you went to so self righteous

1115
01:01:55,160 --> 01:01:56,680
Speaker 3: when you were fucking my brains out.

1116
01:01:58,240 --> 01:02:02,440
Speaker 1: So he convinced Savannah that that she's special while refusing

1117
01:02:02,480 --> 01:02:05,080
Speaker 1: to leave his wife. Right, so he just wanted her

1118
01:02:05,120 --> 01:02:07,040
Speaker 1: to wait to side. I mean, Whitney Houston had a

1119
01:02:07,040 --> 01:02:11,600
Speaker 1: whole song about it. How the song go, the sidebitch

1120
01:02:11,640 --> 01:02:12,720
Speaker 1: song with East.

1121
01:02:12,960 --> 01:02:15,800
Speaker 3: Oh, you're talking about the best side bitch anthem. First

1122
01:02:15,800 --> 01:02:18,080
Speaker 3: of all, I did not know that was a sidebach

1123
01:02:18,120 --> 01:02:23,280
Speaker 3: anthem until I got always knew. I always knew stolen moments.

1124
01:02:23,800 --> 01:02:32,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, you got your family and they need just.

1125
01:02:33,280 --> 01:02:36,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's what she may be in the sidebach sounds

1126
01:02:36,200 --> 01:02:36,800
Speaker 3: so beautiful.

1127
01:02:37,160 --> 01:02:38,480
Speaker 1: I know, it was so nice.

1128
01:02:38,600 --> 01:02:39,160
Speaker 3: We forgot.

1129
01:02:39,400 --> 01:02:41,120
Speaker 1: We didn't listen to the words. It's just sounding an

1130
01:02:41,160 --> 01:02:43,880
Speaker 1: angel singing about side bitch activity.

1131
01:02:43,520 --> 01:02:46,240
Speaker 3: About being in love with side digetivities.

1132
01:02:46,720 --> 01:02:52,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, so Kenneth was full of shit, Okay, but.

1133
01:02:52,760 --> 01:02:55,080
Speaker 3: The way I just feel like the way Savannah fans

1134
01:02:55,160 --> 01:03:01,320
Speaker 3: on him at the at the pool side, you ain't

1135
01:03:01,320 --> 01:03:03,040
Speaker 3: had to do all of that because you was complicit

1136
01:03:03,840 --> 01:03:06,919
Speaker 3: to this very moment, and now you so she wasn't. Yeah,

1137
01:03:06,920 --> 01:03:08,640
Speaker 3: but why are you not going to drink on him though?

1138
01:03:09,160 --> 01:03:10,760
Speaker 3: Just say you don't want to be involved no more

1139
01:03:10,760 --> 01:03:12,680
Speaker 3: and go, because you was complicit the whole time and

1140
01:03:12,680 --> 01:03:14,960
Speaker 3: he was okay with it, quiet while he on the

1141
01:03:14,960 --> 01:03:17,120
Speaker 3: phone with his bitch. Now you're mad, and now you're

1142
01:03:17,120 --> 01:03:18,880
Speaker 3: gonna throw a drink on him. I don't understand that.

1143
01:03:18,920 --> 01:03:24,800
Speaker 1: Part, because he was selling her a dream. Like you know,

1144
01:03:24,920 --> 01:03:27,880
Speaker 1: she probably initially started off being quiet, you know, while

1145
01:03:27,880 --> 01:03:31,000
Speaker 1: he on the phone, because he's supposed to eventually leave

1146
01:03:31,080 --> 01:03:34,280
Speaker 1: her for Savannah, leave his wife.

1147
01:03:34,120 --> 01:03:36,840
Speaker 3: Or then he said another baby on the way.

1148
01:03:37,120 --> 01:03:40,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, she just was aggravated and probably more mad at

1149
01:03:40,120 --> 01:03:40,880
Speaker 1: herself than him.

1150
01:03:40,920 --> 01:03:43,240
Speaker 3: That's that's who she should have been mad at, right.

1151
01:03:43,440 --> 01:03:46,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, so John John was like a He was like

1152
01:03:46,760 --> 01:03:54,360
Speaker 1: a selfish ass fucking narcissist right exactly, dismissive of his

1153
01:03:54,480 --> 01:03:59,360
Speaker 1: partner's sacrifices and financial financially controlling. Uh, And he.

1154
01:03:59,440 --> 01:04:06,880
Speaker 4: Leaves the motherfucking purple and fluid, and he leaves her,

1155
01:04:07,080 --> 01:04:10,160
Speaker 4: He leaves Bernandine for a younger woman with no remorse

1156
01:04:10,200 --> 01:04:10,560
Speaker 4: at all.

1157
01:04:10,600 --> 01:04:15,760
Speaker 1: He was cold as fuck, a younger white woman at that.

1158
01:04:16,760 --> 01:04:19,160
Speaker 1: But he would be dead today.

1159
01:04:19,680 --> 01:04:21,120
Speaker 3: To be better if you were black.

1160
01:04:21,920 --> 01:04:25,520
Speaker 1: Oh you know all the scenes, you are really in

1161
01:04:25,640 --> 01:04:26,120
Speaker 1: that job.

1162
01:04:26,880 --> 01:04:29,480
Speaker 3: I love I love movies, you know I love movies.

1163
01:04:31,400 --> 01:04:37,520
Speaker 1: Russell. He is the he's a bachelor, sing soccer, emotionally unavailable,

1164
01:04:38,480 --> 01:04:41,480
Speaker 1: commitment phobic. He uses this charm to get robbed in

1165
01:04:41,520 --> 01:04:48,600
Speaker 1: a psycle of hope and disappointment. Child, we don't need you,

1166
01:04:49,080 --> 01:04:54,080
Speaker 1: he was, and look, yeah, the modern equivalent to him

1167
01:04:54,080 --> 01:04:56,920
Speaker 1: would be like the person who avoids the labels. You know,

1168
01:04:57,400 --> 01:05:00,000
Speaker 1: I talked about a person before we started recording, okay,

1169
01:05:00,840 --> 01:05:03,919
Speaker 1: saying they're not ready for the relationship but still wants

1170
01:05:03,960 --> 01:05:08,560
Speaker 1: the benefits of one. Right, Yeah, that's who Russell is.

1171
01:05:08,600 --> 01:05:10,640
Speaker 1: So y'all a lot of y'all would Russell right the

1172
01:05:10,680 --> 01:05:11,120
Speaker 1: fuck now?

1173
01:05:11,600 --> 01:05:14,480
Speaker 3: Okay, a lot of y'all laying next to Russell right now.

1174
01:05:14,920 --> 01:05:18,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, And y'all really need to write Russell a letter

1175
01:05:18,240 --> 01:05:20,560
Speaker 1: like Elementary and say check yes or no so you

1176
01:05:20,600 --> 01:05:23,240
Speaker 1: can know what y'all got going on, because y'all just

1177
01:05:23,240 --> 01:05:26,320
Speaker 1: farmers right now, they got going on.

1178
01:05:26,640 --> 01:05:27,000
Speaker 3: They know.

1179
01:05:28,640 --> 01:05:32,080
Speaker 1: Women don't be okay, women, do they really be knowing?

1180
01:05:32,520 --> 01:05:37,040
Speaker 1: I feel like I be knowing right because I don't hallucinate.

1181
01:05:37,960 --> 01:05:42,280
Speaker 1: But sometimes people can get things confused with raw sex, trips,

1182
01:05:43,800 --> 01:05:47,000
Speaker 1: meeting families, meeting your children, all the things and the men,

1183
01:05:47,040 --> 01:05:48,960
Speaker 1: and I ask you, what are we doing? What are

1184
01:05:49,000 --> 01:05:49,800
Speaker 1: we It's like.

1185
01:05:52,760 --> 01:05:55,160
Speaker 3: Farmers, we just fucking around.

1186
01:05:56,920 --> 01:06:00,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I do think women get confused because because

1187
01:06:00,240 --> 01:06:03,560
Speaker 1: why the man maybe like verbally saying one thing, he's

1188
01:06:03,560 --> 01:06:07,920
Speaker 1: physically doing something else. And then Toy is just like

1189
01:06:07,920 --> 01:06:16,360
Speaker 1: I said before, the rebound disaster. Okay, he's immature, he's reckless, disrespectful. Yeah,

1190
01:06:16,440 --> 01:06:20,800
Speaker 1: Robin chaotic escape from her emotions, but it's not capable

1191
01:06:20,800 --> 01:06:24,800
Speaker 1: of providing true partnership. He's just so, he's just that

1192
01:06:24,920 --> 01:06:28,919
Speaker 1: nigga that he's the availability dick. Okay, you don't really

1193
01:06:28,920 --> 01:06:31,400
Speaker 1: want him, and the man you really want ain't available

1194
01:06:31,480 --> 01:06:35,680
Speaker 1: right now, so you're just settling for this bullshit and

1195
01:06:35,760 --> 01:06:37,760
Speaker 1: hopefully eventually you can get the fuck up out of there.

1196
01:06:39,000 --> 01:06:40,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, he was trying to get her to meet his

1197
01:06:40,600 --> 01:06:43,480
Speaker 3: mama and his son, and they had only been talking

1198
01:06:43,480 --> 01:06:45,400
Speaker 3: for three weeks or something like that. It wasn't even

1199
01:06:45,400 --> 01:06:48,880
Speaker 3: that long, yep.

1200
01:06:49,120 --> 01:06:53,600
Speaker 1: And then you got Gloria, right, Gloria has Marvin. They

1201
01:06:53,640 --> 01:06:57,360
Speaker 1: have him labeled as a genuine healer. Okay, he's supportive, patient,

1202
01:06:57,440 --> 01:07:02,240
Speaker 1: emotionally mature. He genuinely it cares for Gloria without manipulation

1203
01:07:02,360 --> 01:07:06,280
Speaker 1: or self selfish motives. So like a modern day equivalent

1204
01:07:06,320 --> 01:07:09,840
Speaker 1: to him would be just an emotionally secure partner who's

1205
01:07:09,880 --> 01:07:12,160
Speaker 1: ready for a committed relationship. And a lot of women

1206
01:07:12,240 --> 01:07:14,000
Speaker 1: ask for that. But I do also believe there's a

1207
01:07:14,040 --> 01:07:16,680
Speaker 1: lot of women, a lot of women ain't ready for it.

1208
01:07:16,920 --> 01:07:18,560
Speaker 1: A lot of women say they want a man that's

1209
01:07:18,600 --> 01:07:21,640
Speaker 1: emotionally intelligent. But he gonna call you fat. He's gonna

1210
01:07:21,640 --> 01:07:23,600
Speaker 1: tell you, baby, you need to work out, baby, he's

1211
01:07:23,640 --> 01:07:29,000
Speaker 1: going no, absolutely, he ain't gonna call you fat. He

1212
01:07:29,080 --> 01:07:32,280
Speaker 1: going come on, let's go to the gym, or or

1213
01:07:32,320 --> 01:07:35,280
Speaker 1: he's gonna tell you when you not showing up right

1214
01:07:35,320 --> 01:07:36,800
Speaker 1: completely for him.

1215
01:07:36,760 --> 01:07:41,840
Speaker 3: And I'm to receive it our part, Yeah.

1216
01:07:42,400 --> 01:07:46,160
Speaker 1: Are you able to receive an emotionally intelligent man? Because hey,

1217
01:07:46,240 --> 01:07:50,040
Speaker 1: you can't show up as an arc with him, right, okay?

1218
01:07:50,040 --> 01:07:52,320
Speaker 1: Because one thing about it, men are not dealing with

1219
01:07:52,360 --> 01:07:54,400
Speaker 1: the ship that we deal with as women. They're not

1220
01:07:54,440 --> 01:07:54,720
Speaker 1: doing it.

1221
01:07:54,720 --> 01:07:56,680
Speaker 3: And when Margaret told her the truth about how she

1222
01:07:56,760 --> 01:07:59,960
Speaker 3: was handling her son, she was mad. She could not

1223
01:08:00,160 --> 01:08:04,360
Speaker 3: handle it. She spassed out, she crashed out, leave, go

1224
01:08:04,760 --> 01:08:07,440
Speaker 3: get the fuck home, Go to your motherfucker house across

1225
01:08:07,440 --> 01:08:10,960
Speaker 3: the street, because my son about to leave it. You

1226
01:08:11,080 --> 01:08:13,480
Speaker 3: saying maybe he's not the one who needs to come

1227
01:08:13,520 --> 01:08:17,439
Speaker 3: to his census. She's like, bitch, get out. You remember

1228
01:08:17,439 --> 01:08:19,240
Speaker 3: that part m.

1229
01:08:18,479 --> 01:08:20,240
Speaker 1: Hm, and what she had to do. Go back and

1230
01:08:20,240 --> 01:08:21,320
Speaker 1: apologize that man.

1231
01:08:21,439 --> 01:08:25,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, who's this good man? Because you're trying to be

1232
01:08:26,080 --> 01:08:29,400
Speaker 3: attached to your son. Let that son go on mm hmm.

1233
01:08:29,760 --> 01:08:32,120
Speaker 1: Let him love because how you who's the man in

1234
01:08:32,160 --> 01:08:34,519
Speaker 1: the house. It's no room for me in here.

1235
01:08:35,200 --> 01:08:41,120
Speaker 3: Marvin was played by Damn. Name is on the tip

1236
01:08:41,120 --> 01:08:43,519
Speaker 3: of my tongue. He was a tap dancer. He's a

1237
01:08:43,720 --> 01:08:50,479
Speaker 3: very talented tap dancer in the eighties and nineties. Fuck

1238
01:08:50,960 --> 01:08:52,840
Speaker 3: that hurts my feelings. I don't know his name right now,

1239
01:08:52,920 --> 01:08:56,200
Speaker 3: and be on tip of my tongue anytime. Gregory Hines yep,

1240
01:08:56,600 --> 01:08:58,800
Speaker 3: mm hm, m hm, yep.

1241
01:09:01,000 --> 01:09:08,240
Speaker 1: Yeah. So we want to know which friend are you? Which,

1242
01:09:08,560 --> 01:09:10,960
Speaker 1: like just women are you in general when it comes

1243
01:09:11,000 --> 01:09:14,360
Speaker 1: to relationships? Out of these characters, what else we want

1244
01:09:14,400 --> 01:09:14,599
Speaker 1: to know?

1245
01:09:14,800 --> 01:09:17,280
Speaker 3: Okay, So, no, we got some homework for y'all this week.

1246
01:09:17,760 --> 01:09:20,920
Speaker 3: If y'all are journal girlies, even if you're not journal girlies,

1247
01:09:21,000 --> 01:09:25,080
Speaker 3: let's start all right, So get into your journal and

1248
01:09:25,240 --> 01:09:29,400
Speaker 3: right now, what's one toxic relationship pattern you're ready to

1249
01:09:29,560 --> 01:09:30,679
Speaker 3: exhale from?

1250
01:09:30,960 --> 01:09:31,120
Speaker 2: Mm?

1251
01:09:32,680 --> 01:09:37,120
Speaker 3: Write that shit down? For yourself, girlfriend, And what about

1252
01:09:37,200 --> 01:09:40,479
Speaker 3: writing down what would your waiting to exhale moment look

1253
01:09:40,640 --> 01:09:43,519
Speaker 3: like for you? And what's going on in your life

1254
01:09:45,560 --> 01:09:48,840
Speaker 3: and which character's journey inspires you the most? And why

1255
01:09:49,920 --> 01:09:50,799
Speaker 3: journal it? Bitch?

1256
01:09:51,520 --> 01:09:52,720
Speaker 1: I had that big town.

1257
01:09:53,160 --> 01:09:56,439
Speaker 3: Yeah, let's get in. That's a good friend, thank you.

1258
01:09:56,560 --> 01:10:00,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, yea, No, I'm gonna write my shit down. I

1259
01:10:00,360 --> 01:10:03,200
Speaker 1: got a lot of toxic traits, deflection, all types of shit,

1260
01:10:03,280 --> 01:10:05,760
Speaker 1: I know. But the thing is, i'd be consciously aware

1261
01:10:05,760 --> 01:10:07,720
Speaker 1: of the things I can. I can tell you what

1262
01:10:07,800 --> 01:10:11,280
Speaker 1: I did, And here's I actually like to tell people

1263
01:10:11,280 --> 01:10:14,599
Speaker 1: what I did wrong first, even like, let me tell

1264
01:10:14,640 --> 01:10:16,000
Speaker 1: you what I did first, and you tell me if

1265
01:10:16,000 --> 01:10:17,760
Speaker 1: I'm tripping it or not. That's when I really start

1266
01:10:17,800 --> 01:10:19,280
Speaker 1: with my shit, and then I'll tell you what else

1267
01:10:19,280 --> 01:10:22,640
Speaker 1: happened after that? Okay, what could have possibly what I

1268
01:10:22,680 --> 01:10:26,040
Speaker 1: could have possibly done to start the shit and maybe

1269
01:10:26,240 --> 01:10:28,800
Speaker 1: avoided the shit? Right, It's what I'm gonna start with

1270
01:10:29,080 --> 01:10:29,800
Speaker 1: most of the time.

1271
01:10:30,880 --> 01:10:33,400
Speaker 3: So yeah, it's getting on our journals, girlies, and let's

1272
01:10:33,400 --> 01:10:35,120
Speaker 3: write this shit down so we can be better.

1273
01:10:35,960 --> 01:10:41,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, man, better friends, better lovers, y'all like this?

1274
01:10:41,360 --> 01:10:44,519
Speaker 3: Yeah, this is fine, I know. Next week I want

1275
01:10:44,520 --> 01:10:48,800
Speaker 3: to do I really want to get into a thin

1276
01:10:48,880 --> 01:10:52,040
Speaker 3: line between eleve and hate. We need to talk about Brandy.

1277
01:10:53,920 --> 01:10:54,519
Speaker 3: Can we do it?

1278
01:10:55,080 --> 01:10:57,400
Speaker 1: We know of Brandy in real life too, same first

1279
01:10:57,439 --> 01:11:03,240
Speaker 1: and last name. Yeah, yeah, we want to let us

1280
01:11:03,240 --> 01:11:05,920
Speaker 1: know if y'all enjoyed this episode though, right, and we're

1281
01:11:05,960 --> 01:11:08,120
Speaker 1: gonna I want to do it. We could do like

1282
01:11:08,160 --> 01:11:10,240
Speaker 1: one more. We could break it down this ship, this

1283
01:11:10,280 --> 01:11:11,320
Speaker 1: is This was fun to me.

1284
01:11:11,600 --> 01:11:14,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was a lot of fun, all right, y'all.

1285
01:11:14,800 --> 01:11:16,800
Speaker 1: So if you enjoy this episode, y'all, tune in every

1286
01:11:16,800 --> 01:11:19,400
Speaker 1: Thursday and the Black Effect iHeart Radio app. Whoever the

1287
01:11:19,479 --> 01:11:21,479
Speaker 1: fuck you get your podcast that. This is your co

1288
01:11:21,600 --> 01:11:25,080
Speaker 1: host aj Holiday two point zero on Instagrams. We want

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Speaker 1: to see them them journals all right, kick journal injuries.

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01:11:28,600 --> 01:11:30,080
Speaker 3: We want to see it and we want to read

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01:11:30,080 --> 01:11:33,560
Speaker 3: it and be nosy y'all. Is official tam Bam on Instagram.

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01:11:33,600 --> 01:11:36,559
Speaker 3: Please follow me. I love y'all so much. Thank y'all

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01:11:36,600 --> 01:11:38,479
Speaker 3: for tuning in. Remember speak now.

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Speaker 1: And never hold your breath.

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Speaker 3: Okay, never hold your breath. Breathe, bitch, breathe.

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Speaker 1: Four more podcasts from iHeartRadio. Visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple

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Speaker 1: Podcasts or whatever. You listen to your favorite shows