Speaker 1: I am at the age at my big age.
Speaker 2: You're not big age where it's big, Okay, all right,
Speaker 2: at least my back am.
Speaker 3: I'm at the big age where at forty being misunderstood
Speaker 3: by people.
Speaker 2: I don't really give a fluk.
Speaker 1: I'm not there yet. You're not there yet. No, that's
Speaker 1: all right.
Speaker 2: I'm at a youthful age. I'm not saying big age.
Speaker 2: I'm at a youthful age. Is youthful is ish? I'm
Speaker 2: at a youthful is age where they look they're like,
Speaker 2: stop lying and you can get it out if you
Speaker 2: just say big age. You see what I'm saying. You
Speaker 2: know what I'm not saying.
Speaker 1: I am at a youthful ish age where.
Speaker 2: Sometimes people's opinions about me affect me and I'm working
Speaker 2: on that.
Speaker 1: That's real. That's real, that assass.
Speaker 2: Hey, I'm Kadeen and I'm Devout and we're the Ellis's.
Speaker 1: You may know us.
Speaker 4: From posting funny videos with our.
Speaker 1: Voys and reading each other publicly as a form of therapy.
Speaker 2: Wait, I make you need therapy most days. Wow.
Speaker 1: Oh and one more important thing to mention, we're married.
Speaker 4: Yes, sir, we are. We created this podcast to open
Speaker 4: dialogue about some of Li's most taboo topics.
Speaker 1: Things most folks don't want to talk about.
Speaker 4: Through the lens of a millennial married couple. Dead ass
Speaker 4: is a term that we say every day. So when
Speaker 4: we say dead ass, we're actually saying facts one hundred
Speaker 4: the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
Speaker 1: We about to take philosof to our whole new level.
Speaker 1: Dead ass starts right now. All right, story time, get
Speaker 1: into the story time.
Speaker 3: So since we're talking today about being misunderstood, I'll tell
Speaker 3: you about this one time where I felt severely misunderstood and.
Speaker 2: It really physically impacted me to the point where I
Speaker 2: lost the baby. Oh my god, Yep, lost the baby
Speaker 2: over it. It was stressed and.
Speaker 3: It was stressed induced. I think I'm now in retrospect. Yeah,
Speaker 3: And I recently shared the story on another podcast and
Speaker 3: Deval and I had gone viral. A clip of our
Speaker 3: podcast had gone viral and we were talking about monogamy.
Speaker 3: So naturally, when you talk about monogamy in general, people
Speaker 3: are going to have their opinions.
Speaker 1: About what that looks like.
Speaker 3: But in the particular clip, which tends to happen where
Speaker 3: you release a thirty forty five second clip out of
Speaker 3: an hour long conversation and then people, you know this
Speaker 3: is your world, baby, you know this is your world.
Speaker 3: So this clip was released, and of course once you
Speaker 3: do that and you put it out into the general public,
Speaker 3: people are open to their own opinions about it, building
Speaker 3: a story and a narrative around that clip. So within
Speaker 3: the clip, Devout had talked about feeling. I gave him
Speaker 3: an ultimatum when I told him, like, listen, I'm not
Speaker 3: going to be a living girl girlfriend, not gonna be
Speaker 3: your baby mama. It's either you're going ship and get
Speaker 3: off the pot yep, or I can just go back
Speaker 3: to New York. Because at the time I was living
Speaker 3: with him in Detroit. He was playing ball, And I said,
Speaker 3: you know, I could just go back to New York,
Speaker 3: focus on myself, and when you figure things out, all
Speaker 3: at me.
Speaker 2: No hard feeling.
Speaker 3: See if I'm Silvilia, We'll see how it goes, you know.
Speaker 3: And in that moment, the conversation became, oh, like, you
Speaker 3: gave me an ultimatum. You were putting my back against
Speaker 3: the wall and forcing me to make a choice. And
Speaker 3: I said, I wasn't forcing you to do anything. I
Speaker 3: was just letting you know where I.
Speaker 1: Stood options right, yeah.
Speaker 2: Or what I was willing to put up with her not.
Speaker 2: So of course there were mixed reviews.
Speaker 3: Someone were like, yeah, shout out took it even for
Speaker 3: standing her ground. And then it's like, oh, Devo didn't
Speaker 3: really want to settle down because.
Speaker 1: She forced him to.
Speaker 3: And there were so many clips, so many comments. You
Speaker 3: had people who were for Devour, people who were against me,
Speaker 3: and then vice versa. But I realized that we were
Speaker 3: new to the social media space. We were new to
Speaker 3: the podcast space. And that was that first time when
Speaker 3: I really like got into the comments section and felt like, well,
Speaker 3: I have to defend my point.
Speaker 1: Did you not listen to the hour long podcast?
Speaker 3: And Deval was in a space where he was like, bucket,
Speaker 3: I don't care what people have to say.
Speaker 1: He didn't care.
Speaker 2: He was just like, for real, didn't care because to him,
Speaker 2: he was like, well, sometimes you know, bad press is
Speaker 2: good press in a sense where you know, our podcast
Speaker 2: was going viral, so it was sparking conversations, it was
Speaker 2: bringing traction to the page. But I don't think he
Speaker 2: or I in that moment, understood how physically it was
Speaker 2: affecting me.
Speaker 1: He was away filming.
Speaker 3: I forget the show, but he was in Atlanta at
Speaker 3: the time, and I found out I was pregnant that September.
Speaker 3: This clip went viral, I want to say, maybe early October,
Speaker 3: and everything was fine. You know, I was maybe about
Speaker 3: seven eight weeks along pregnant, and I had just found
Speaker 3: out a little before he left. So I stayed back
Speaker 3: home with the kids, who were living in California at
Speaker 3: the time, because you know, the whole pandemic situation was happening,
Speaker 3: and they just started to film a little bit. We're
Speaker 3: getting back to filming, and I remember feeling cramping.
Speaker 1: I felt my stomach was off.
Speaker 3: I had the pit in my stomach of anxiety because
Speaker 3: I know I was in the comment section, but it
Speaker 3: was hard to decipher what was triggering what right was
Speaker 3: it just me being anxious about the whole thing, thinking,
Speaker 3: oh my god, people are like all eyes on us,
Speaker 3: and not realizing how that was affecting me internally with
Speaker 3: this pregnancy. Ended up driving myself to the er, had
Speaker 3: a sonogram done, heartbeat, viable, pregnancy, Everything's fine.
Speaker 2: Hey, just take it easy. Doctor said, maybe do a
Speaker 2: couple of days bed rests just to kind of put
Speaker 2: yourself at ease, and then went home and within a
Speaker 2: few hours, you know, lost that baby. And it was
Speaker 2: a super, of course, traumatic moment because if I wasn't there,
Speaker 2: I was by myself. I told the story in another
Speaker 2: podcast about being in the bathroom and when I finally
Speaker 2: realized that I had passed the pregnancy, I had the
Speaker 2: FaceTime with Devel on the floor in the bathroom and
Speaker 2: I pulled my pants underwear down in one hand.
Speaker 3: It was just like blood everywhere. And then my kids
Speaker 3: are knocking on the door, Mama, we want to make pizza. Mam,
Speaker 3: are you gonna come make pizza? And I was like,
Speaker 3: of course, sobbing, Devo sobbing on the phone and I'm like, mom,
Speaker 3: will be right there, and I'm coming and I'm getting
Speaker 3: myself together, I'm cleaning up, meet me downstairs in like
Speaker 3: ten minutes. And what I just in that moment, everything
Speaker 3: just started to flash in my mind about the chain
Speaker 3: of events. And then a little bit after that, maybe
Speaker 3: a week or two after it, dev I was.
Speaker 2: Just like, yo, you think that you're stressed.
Speaker 3: How you were just stressed in that moment and it
Speaker 3: had to do with the spark of you just feeling
Speaker 3: misunderstood in that moment and having to like defend yourself.
Speaker 2: Yes, that physically affected you. And from that moment on
Speaker 2: and of course now at my big age of forty
Speaker 2: for sure people's and being misunderstood, I do not care.
Speaker 2: Wow wow, thank you for sharing that. No, thank you,
Speaker 2: I'm so listen you went through that.
Speaker 1: Thank you girl.
Speaker 2: Wowowow.
Speaker 1: So that was my story time child in a nutshell.
Speaker 3: However, the blessing and that that moment I couldn't see
Speaker 3: at the time.
Speaker 1: But what we're gonna do.
Speaker 2: We're gonna get into karaoke, take a break, and we'll
Speaker 2: come back talk a little bit more about the story time.
Speaker 2: All right, karaoke time, okay, sell me, MSB. You're trying
Speaker 2: to figure out what to sing because neither of us.
Speaker 1: I don't want to say. Singing is my forte.
Speaker 2: I mean, I can hold a note, now, don't play.
Speaker 2: I couldn't hold it if you placed it in the
Speaker 2: palm of my hand.
Speaker 1: Let's be for real. Okay, let's be for real.
Speaker 3: But my audience, my dad asked, family, they give me
Speaker 3: a safe space to who and.
Speaker 2: Holler and howel.
Speaker 1: Okay, so we can do this, and we can do
Speaker 1: this together.
Speaker 3: But since we're talking about being misunderstood, the song that
Speaker 3: came to mind and I told you about it just
Speaker 3: like that's actually the terfect one and it's giving a throwback.
Speaker 3: It's giving throwback from one of my favorite grooves, Escape
Speaker 3: shout out to Escape.
Speaker 1: So ready, let's go five six?
Speaker 2: Ready, And what I need from you is understand. Oh
Speaker 2: we are off off, I hold. What what I need
Speaker 2: from you is understand. I just jump on your can
Speaker 2: we start?
Speaker 1: I don't base why.
Speaker 2: I need from you. I was trying to go fight candy.
Speaker 2: Candy is a little bit lower registered. I start from
Speaker 2: alto are you suprano? We started a little horsie. What
Speaker 2: I need from you is understand. How can we communaka communicate?
Speaker 2: That's it. When we went did that?
Speaker 4: We did it?
Speaker 1: Know the rest of the work maybe I had. That's
Speaker 1: always the problem, we killing butchering people. So listen, our
Speaker 1: heart's in the right place. Our heart's in the right place, okay,
Speaker 1: And the.
Speaker 3: Next place we need to be is paying these bills,
Speaker 3: because that's, you know, very important. So we're gonna pay
Speaker 3: some bills and we're gonna come right back and we're
Speaker 3: gonna dive back into story time and talking about being misunderstood,
Speaker 3: because what we need from you is undertaking understand Yeah,
Speaker 3: that was.
Speaker 1: Good, all right, so we're back.
Speaker 3: By now you probably figured out who my beautiful guest
Speaker 3: is here today. Be Simon, y'all, is a comedian, social
Speaker 3: media personality, podcast hosts an entrepreneur.
Speaker 1: Your podcast Let's try this again.
Speaker 3: It takes a vulnerable look at what it takes to
Speaker 3: be resilient, especially in the public eye. And she's currently
Speaker 3: on tour, baby, so grab your tickets in your respective city,
Speaker 3: and even if it's not in your respective city, it's giving.
Speaker 1: Get a group of.
Speaker 2: Girls together, a group of guys, make it a trip
Speaker 2: so you can see her on tour performing stand up
Speaker 2: comedy around the country.
Speaker 3: And she's here to share some of herself with us today.
Speaker 3: And we appreciate you being here today.
Speaker 2: Thank you, thank you for showing me so excited. When
Speaker 2: I got invited, I was like, are you sure really
Speaker 2: said Simone?
Speaker 1: Give me somebody I heard.
Speaker 3: Simone is like one of the very popular middle names
Speaker 3: for women, like I forget where I saw it.
Speaker 2: It might have been like a.
Speaker 1: Lot of Simon's names, rais and all that.
Speaker 3: So you fell into that category, girl, So it's funny.
Speaker 3: I normally will give a little blurb about who the
Speaker 3: guest is, but I always like to hear your take
Speaker 3: on it.
Speaker 1: Who is b Simone?
Speaker 2: You know what I used to when people ask me
Speaker 2: that question. I used to be like, I'm a stand
Speaker 2: up coman, I'm an entrepreneur. It's like, that's what you do.
Speaker 2: That is not who you are, Like who are you?
Speaker 1: Interesting?
Speaker 2: I am a daughter, I'm loving, I'm a friend. I
Speaker 2: am hopeful, I'm optimistic. I walk in purpose like I
Speaker 2: feel like that's more of who I am. And I'm
Speaker 2: still finding myself. Like every time I find myself, I chan.
Speaker 1: You see me baby.
Speaker 2: Two days ago, I had hair. I was going to
Speaker 2: get into that too, because when she pops out of
Speaker 2: the vehicle, this.
Speaker 1: Is my first and I love it too. I love it.
Speaker 1: I love it for you like me. It's giving. You know,
Speaker 1: a woman who cuts her hair is about to change
Speaker 1: the world. But you be kind here all the time.
Speaker 1: I got a sad I need.
Speaker 2: I can't even worr new rag.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do nothing for this. You cannot wait, not
Speaker 1: a thing, but I am. I'm going through a season.
Speaker 2: I'm always going through something, and I feel like I
Speaker 2: changed so often when you're trying to grow, you should
Speaker 2: be changing rapidly as possible, you know, as certain things
Speaker 2: evolve and shift. But I pure intent. I truly believe
Speaker 2: my heart is so big. I love people, I love laughing,
Speaker 2: I love being happy, and I'm like, all right, there's
Speaker 2: egg shells in here.
Speaker 1: Let's just sliving it up because you know, yeah, I
Speaker 1: love I love.
Speaker 2: What I do.
Speaker 1: Who's brayling?
Speaker 2: Because it's funny you mentioned B Simone and B Simone's
Speaker 2: a it's to an extent, a persona that we see
Speaker 2: on social media, and she is the person who's on stage,
Speaker 2: she is the comedian, she is the podcast host.
Speaker 1: But then who's braillant?
Speaker 2: Yeah? And I think all the things I said, But
Speaker 2: also like I'll give you an example, B Simone. Thankfully
Speaker 2: I built a persona and a character around who I am,
Speaker 2: so be Simone is part of Me's just not all
Speaker 2: of me. I'm not walking around the airport at six
Speaker 2: am when y'all be walking up to me trying to
Speaker 2: take a picture. Baby, it's like it's five forty five.
Speaker 1: I can relate to that, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: Right now? Or I don't feel good or I am tired,
Speaker 2: or I did just get off the phone with a
Speaker 2: family member and things aren't going well. I'm not always happy,
Speaker 2: and I would say on the internet, I'm not always
Speaker 2: happy either. I tried to show all of me because
Speaker 2: that is what got me to this point, being vulnerable,
Speaker 2: relatable and real. Yes, so b Simone isn't too far
Speaker 2: from Braylin, you know, but she's just b Simone is
Speaker 2: just a part of Braylin, not all of Braylin, gotcha.
Speaker 2: So yeah, Brailen has a lot of depth and she
Speaker 2: goes through a lot and I don't show every single.
Speaker 3: Team, so it's not that they differ per se, but
Speaker 3: it's more so one is a little bit more withheld. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: which is which is I think accurate because I think
Speaker 3: about myself as too myself too.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 3: You see Kadeen, Kadeen the wife, Kadiah the mom, Kadeen
Speaker 3: you know the podcasts, Kadeen the entrepreneur. But there's certain
Speaker 3: parts of Kadeen that people haven't experienced, and I feel
Speaker 3: like I need to for my own sanity, for my
Speaker 3: own protection. There's certain parts of me that I just
Speaker 3: feel like the public doesn't necessarily deserve do.
Speaker 1: You have you ever been there?
Speaker 2: Can you say parts?
Speaker 4: Like what?
Speaker 2: Can you say that? Or do you not? Like?
Speaker 1: Can you say it?
Speaker 2: Do you share those parts? It's also it's it's the
Speaker 2: parts that people know about me already. It's the it's
Speaker 2: the wife, it's the daughter, it's the podcast host. But
Speaker 2: then there's like deeper layers to that that I just
Speaker 2: feel like, you don't have to have all of that.
Speaker 2: You can't see all of that, you can't be privy
Speaker 2: to all of that, because then, like you said, people
Speaker 2: always expect that of you. So I've just come to
Speaker 2: a point now where I'm just like, I just don't
Speaker 2: want to share everything, everything, everything. And the beauty of
Speaker 2: social media in the space that we're in is that
Speaker 2: we can curate our own content. We can let people
Speaker 2: see what we want to want them to see. But
Speaker 2: also too, you want to stay authentic and true to
Speaker 2: who yourself really is.
Speaker 3: So it's not a matter of you know, not being
Speaker 3: who you are, but it's about protecting the pieces of
Speaker 3: you that you feel like are sacred.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And you know what, because I'm so vulnerable and transparent,
Speaker 2: I share a lot and if I'm not sharing a
Speaker 2: part of that it's because sharing that will affect other people,
Speaker 2: not because I don't want to share it. So I'm like,
Speaker 2: I actually want to share my family and my upbringing
Speaker 2: and my childhood trauma and a lot of that in detail,
Speaker 2: but it would affect to any people, gotcha. So I'm
Speaker 2: actually always in protective mode of other people's feelings and
Speaker 2: how they're perceived, but I actually want to share.
Speaker 3: This stuff because they didn't sign up for it, right, right,
Speaker 3: We're even protective now of just sharing our siblings to
Speaker 3: an extent, niece's nephew's family, because you just know how
Speaker 3: that couldn't have a dominant effect and effect peopleho didn't
Speaker 3: sign up for this public life. So going back to
Speaker 3: my story time, you know, talking about a moment where
Speaker 3: I was misunderstood and it really affected me.
Speaker 1: Did you have a moment where you felt like, damn,
Speaker 1: that did not land well.
Speaker 3: People did not to be able to not get what
Speaker 3: I was trying to give and that was completely chopped
Speaker 3: and screwed and misunderstood.
Speaker 1: Girl, do you have you had a story like that
Speaker 1: that you can share and how you kind of worked
Speaker 1: through that.
Speaker 2: Mine was kind of like yours, Like my biggest hit
Speaker 2: was like my first public like boom.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god.
Speaker 2: I went from everybody liking me and the internet funny
Speaker 2: black girl and the viral girl too she's a play dress.
Speaker 2: I was like, okay, that was one of my first
Speaker 2: big like HiT's. Oh my god, this is a mind boggling,
Speaker 2: you know. Like I went through a whole thing where
Speaker 2: I put out a book and some pages in the
Speaker 2: book were actually taking off Pinterest through my graphic designer. Right,
Speaker 2: so I look through the book and once again, y'all,
Speaker 2: if you're starting a business rushing, do not rush. Know
Speaker 2: who you're hiring, have contracts. I had to learn this
Speaker 2: the hard way, like, all right, if anything happens, it's
Speaker 2: not on me, it's on whoever put it together or whatever.
Speaker 2: But once again, I took the hit because I'm the
Speaker 2: face of the brand.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So the day the world found out was the day
Speaker 2: I found out.
Speaker 1: I was like, y'all, I didn't know it either.
Speaker 2: You know, I'm calling my lawyer, I'm calling it, you know.
Speaker 2: So but that really affected me because it wasn't my intent,
Speaker 2: you know what I mean. So when you go through
Speaker 2: the comments, you want to stick.
Speaker 1: Up for yourself. Of course, that's that's natural.
Speaker 3: That's not what I'm natural, especially when it attacks your
Speaker 3: character and your integrity.
Speaker 2: I don't care if you think I'm not funny. I
Speaker 2: don't care if you don't like my ballad. I don't
Speaker 2: care if you don't like my gap. I got baby teeth,
Speaker 2: don't care. It could have been had ven ears. Don't
Speaker 2: want them, I don't want them. I don't care if
Speaker 2: you think my ass is flat. I don't care if
Speaker 2: you think when you question my character that bothers me.
Speaker 2: For sure, it bothers me. But I'm learning, like Braylan,
Speaker 2: why why do you need validation so much from man?
Speaker 2: Why do you need to be liked so much? The
Speaker 2: why is important now, So now I'm digging back the
Speaker 2: layers and trying to heal that so it truly doesn't matter.
Speaker 2: I'm getting better, but it's not totally gone, And I
Speaker 2: think it's important to get to a point where it's like,
Speaker 2: I really don't f it, I don't care. I think
Speaker 2: that is so important because at this point I have
Speaker 2: an audience of one. I have an audience one who's
Speaker 2: making all the moves, Who's making all the moves all
Speaker 2: the who who is telling me how to move. If
Speaker 2: I focus on him, I can't be focused on what
Speaker 2: millions of people think.
Speaker 1: You know what, I've also learned everyone is not for you, yes, yes.
Speaker 2: Okay, focused on the people that love you, that's okay.
Speaker 3: Yes, you know, right before I went on to our tour,
Speaker 3: our live show again this past uh go around in February.
Speaker 3: You know, naturally, before you get on stage and you
Speaker 3: have a tour, you just have these feelings where you're just.
Speaker 2: Like, oh my god, don't don't make it's nerves.
Speaker 1: It's natural.
Speaker 2: And I think it's healthy to have that, because if
Speaker 2: I wasn't nervous and didn't care, then I like already
Speaker 2: bought their tickets.
Speaker 1: But I was just like, I kind of just like
Speaker 1: you know, in my head, and usually do that.
Speaker 2: Has some time to talk me off the ledge half
Speaker 2: the time, and I was on the phone with Crystal,
Speaker 2: Crystal reinine Taste, Yes, good friend of ours. We just
Speaker 2: had a game together actually, and Christial was like, Okay,
Speaker 2: just know that everybody there is for you. Everybody who's
Speaker 2: there that bought a ticket that wants to do the
Speaker 2: meet and greet, they want to see you, They want
Speaker 2: to see you succeed. They don't need you don't have
Speaker 2: that right exactly.
Speaker 1: I mean I didn't do a split baby.
Speaker 2: Now she was out there, I was like, wow.
Speaker 3: Now ask me if I did a split since then,
Speaker 3: because this one a little the left hip was acting
Speaker 3: up on me.
Speaker 2: You know, you're just healing hep.
Speaker 1: We're healing the HEP.
Speaker 2: But no, in that moment, she just made me realize
Speaker 2: that they were there for me. And that was like
Speaker 2: a really like big thing in that moment, and I
Speaker 2: had to kind of tell myself that who's there, They
Speaker 2: love you want to be there for me. These are
Speaker 2: the people in the people who are the random passions by,
Speaker 2: the random comments that have something negative to say.
Speaker 3: Chances are they not following me. It's just some random
Speaker 3: passer by through your page. But staying true and authentic
Speaker 3: to who you are for those people is important. How
Speaker 3: do you maintain that because a lot of what we
Speaker 3: were talking about, like I said, this season is perception
Speaker 3: and reality.
Speaker 2: So how do you or how is your reality affected
Speaker 2: by people's perception of you? How do you differentiate the two? Yeah,
Speaker 2: you know, I'm so scared of being caught and being
Speaker 2: fake or fraud that I'm almost overly think that is
Speaker 2: like also a gift of mine.
Speaker 1: But I'm so vulnerable, so open. Like if you go
Speaker 1: back on my YouTube, y'all see me.
Speaker 2: Pulling up in a Honda, three hubcaps, roll down windows.
Speaker 1: I'm like, we all been there?
Speaker 2: What you mean? And I think that comes with comedy too,
Speaker 2: like laughing at your pain or laughing at your situation.
Speaker 2: It's like I tell you before you say it. It's
Speaker 2: like I've already said that, be someone driva toyota. I've
Speaker 2: already said that, yes, be someone against me. I hate
Speaker 2: you guys, you cuse you have sex before marriage, but
Speaker 2: you say you love Lord. I already said that. I'm
Speaker 2: telling you all my journey, and I'm taking y'all on
Speaker 2: the journey with me. There's nothing you can say about
Speaker 2: me that I haven't already said about myself.
Speaker 1: That's powerful.
Speaker 2: So that is a person like that. It's hard to
Speaker 2: f with I am. There's nothing I'm hiding. This is
Speaker 2: who I am. And if there's something I don't like
Speaker 2: about myself, I'm working hard to change it. And the
Speaker 2: things I can't change, I'm trying to embrace those things, right,
Speaker 2: you know. So I think it's important just to put
Speaker 2: put it out there, and I make it a joke
Speaker 2: because I'm a comedian. So I think that helps me
Speaker 2: with my gift. I'm like even recently when we said
Speaker 2: I was walking through the mall handing out right, I'm
Speaker 2: promoting my own show six millions, that this show ain't
Speaker 2: sold out, right, So guess what I'm gonna be this
Speaker 2: that's the truth in this moment.
Speaker 1: I thought I would have sold out this show a
Speaker 1: couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 2: It's not sold out.
Speaker 1: You got back to the grassroots, back to the truth.
Speaker 2: Of fat on the ground, but instead of got sold out, No,
Speaker 2: we ain't sold out. I don't know what's going on,
Speaker 2: but marketing got to step up absolutely putting the truth
Speaker 2: out there and getting ahead of the truth and just
Speaker 2: living in it. That's the truth, you know. So I
Speaker 2: think that's a gift of mine. And I love that
Speaker 2: feeling of authenticity because not being authentic is you.
Speaker 3: Got to keep that up, that facade, man, And you
Speaker 3: cannot use against me what I've already spoken about divine
Speaker 3: the same thing with us Super Transparent, since our the
Speaker 3: inception of the Elysis or even the Dead Ass podcast,
Speaker 3: we talk about this being almost like therapy for us.
Speaker 1: People literally be in our business.
Speaker 3: Like in the conversations, we've had moments of revelation here
Speaker 3: a huge major whether it's individual revelations, marital revelations, parents,
Speaker 3: and revelations that it's happen right here.
Speaker 1: Oh for sure, that's happened. For sure.
Speaker 3: Absolutely we have. And if you've had an argument before,
Speaker 3: were going to tell you what we argued about, you know,
Speaker 3: and then naturally you have people like I saw with Kadeen,
Speaker 3: I can relate to. But we are telling you what's happening,
Speaker 3: so you in real time. Even in the beginning when
Speaker 3: we talked, we spoke about like an infidelity or something
Speaker 3: like early on in the relationship, when we're dating, whatever.
Speaker 3: Nobody could pop up and say nothing, yeah, because it's.
Speaker 2: All already said.
Speaker 1: We already said it, been there, done that.
Speaker 3: I love that you mentioned your comedy because I was
Speaker 3: wondering now that B is evolving, because I think the
Speaker 3: we're talking about, of course, perception, reality, misunderstanding. However, the
Speaker 3: evolution of B what informs your stand up now that
Speaker 3: you are a comedian, because I think that's at the
Speaker 3: forefront of what you're doing now. You know, the live
Speaker 3: show comedy mixed with podcasting, which is a nice twist
Speaker 3: on a live show. So what informs your standard?
Speaker 2: Uh truly me on that stage? And what is crazy
Speaker 2: that you said that? I have jokes that I've had
Speaker 2: for forty years, five years. They grow the joke could
Speaker 2: have been thirty seconds, now it's two minutes. I've stretched
Speaker 2: it and I've growed it. Yeah, growed it. I'm grooted it.
Speaker 2: I've rode it.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So those jokes, it's like sometimes I get on stage
Speaker 2: and say it and I'm like, I'm actually acting now
Speaker 2: because this isn't me anymore. So I've gotten off stage
Speaker 2: and been like, I need to rewrite that. Okay, I shouldn't.
Speaker 2: That's not even me anymore. I've had to adjust so
Speaker 2: many things I have, Like are you'll all growing here?
Speaker 2: I almost went super left field.
Speaker 1: Go go God, God, God say it, say it. You
Speaker 1: know this is no holds barred.
Speaker 2: Because I'm working on my mouth. Thank you. I'm gonna
Speaker 2: keep your dead ass. I have a given head joke.
Speaker 1: You've forgot my husband give hands you?
Speaker 2: Oh right, a great talk about I have a given
Speaker 2: head joke. But I gave head in eighteen months because
Speaker 2: why I'm.
Speaker 1: Celebant, right and there is an evolution of the head game.
Speaker 2: So it's like it could be it's like I changed
Speaker 2: that joke up to be like when I used to okay,
Speaker 2: or I tell my celibacy journey, right, tell my journey.
Speaker 2: I intertwine all the truths. But it's like I did
Speaker 2: have to adjust my comedy because as a stand up comic,
Speaker 2: hits your life and your truth on that stage. And
Speaker 2: I hadn't been doing so many jokes for so long
Speaker 2: and got repetitive. I'm like, this joke isn't me anymore right? Right?
Speaker 4: Yea?
Speaker 3: Or do you curtail it to audience? I know that
Speaker 3: getting up on stage doing comedy is not easy. Have
Speaker 3: you found yourself being like shit that didn't fall or
Speaker 3: land the way I.
Speaker 1: Thought it was for me? Like re rework that because
Speaker 1: they didn't they didn't pick up what I was dripping.
Speaker 2: That was funny in the bathroom when I was at
Speaker 2: the house by myself in the shower, I was really giggling.
Speaker 2: Y'all was quiet, right, keep talking, just keep talking any birthday.
Speaker 2: Stop making fun of the people on the front row.
Speaker 2: That's what you do.
Speaker 1: I'm like, all right, brother, how you doing? What's improv right? No,
Speaker 1: for sure, for sure.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but that's how you work the stage the comedy
Speaker 2: clubs is like working out in the gym. You don't
Speaker 2: know if it works until you do it in front
Speaker 2: of a crowd. So you have to practice in front
Speaker 2: of people, you know, So that stand up is not
Speaker 2: your mama, not your brother, not your friends. Well then again,
Speaker 2: you may have those friends that are brutally honest with you.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 1: Listen, girl, now to rewrite that one.
Speaker 2: Re wrote it.
Speaker 1: Go back in the chamber, get back in the lab,
Speaker 1: rewrote it.
Speaker 2: What are some things that you feel like you've had
Speaker 2: to sacrifice to get to where you are today that
Speaker 2: you wish you hadn't because how many? How many years
Speaker 2: have you been in the game. I want to say
Speaker 2: from like the exception of like your YouTube's all that, Like.
Speaker 1: Right over a decade, I started my Space what is it?
Speaker 2: My Space days, my Space interests, like I was going
Speaker 2: not I mean, I guess back then it was. My
Speaker 2: pictures were everywhere on my Space and Facebook. So over
Speaker 2: fifteen years, man, but you know I did. It's even
Speaker 2: before that because in elementary school, middle school, I wasn't dance.
Speaker 2: I was in art when I was fifteen, I was
Speaker 2: in my first girl group.
Speaker 1: Did you get on your report card? Talks to too
Speaker 1: much in class? Were you that person every time?
Speaker 2: Every time you're always talking? You always the people you like?
Speaker 1: Yeah, you was talking to this one in classic one.
Speaker 2: My teachers loved me though. I got most likely to succeed,
Speaker 2: most likely to be famous. Yeah, I got to living up.
Speaker 1: Listen, that's how you got to speak life into them.
Speaker 1: Kids from not like my Caz. My third son just
Speaker 1: came home with like the Remarkable Reader Award, and I'm
Speaker 1: just like, bro, that's great, that's so good.
Speaker 3: You're just super smart, like you know, And I could
Speaker 3: just see him being a little student lawyer, yeah, checking everybody,
Speaker 3: because he'd be checking my ass.
Speaker 2: But I definitely didn't get reader.
Speaker 1: I didn't when you know, when the teacher going around
Speaker 1: and it come to you, I was like the dog
Speaker 1: and the you know what I used to do. I
Speaker 1: used to because I used to hate reading aloud. I
Speaker 1: still kind of hate reading aloud to this day, quiet
Speaker 1: as it's kept.
Speaker 2: But I used to like, look at who was before me,
Speaker 2: and I'm like, if they're reading like two paragraphs and
Speaker 2: that's like four paragraphs.
Speaker 1: Eight Okay, so somebody get excited and read the extra.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you done read my part son. I literally
Speaker 1: was practicing all of the big words. I had a flow,
Speaker 1: and now I read Cole read co read cold. I
Speaker 1: definitely wasn't that, but I was. I've been doing it forever.
Speaker 2: To answer your question, and I think something that I
Speaker 2: sacrificed was being intentional with love, like over as intentional
Speaker 2: as I am with my business and my purpose and
Speaker 2: the fulfillment I get from podcasting and acting and being
Speaker 2: on set.
Speaker 1: And I love what I do.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't change it for the world. And I know
Speaker 2: God called me to it. God called me to this
Speaker 2: industry for a reason. He's molding me and shifting me
Speaker 2: right in front of the industry's eyes. And he planted
Speaker 2: me in this industry to be a light, which is
Speaker 2: so difficult.
Speaker 3: That's trying to grow personally, trying to grow publicly, and
Speaker 3: like you said, if you've been in a fifteen years,
Speaker 3: that puts you to being like a teenager growing publicly.
Speaker 2: They're like, you know, Jesus, you're still cussing, bitch. Look now,
Speaker 2: I've been cussing for twenty years, and I gave my
Speaker 2: life to Christ eleven months ago. Give me a second,
Speaker 2: give me a minute. I'm getting better. Y'all are just
Speaker 2: watching my transition on camera. Nobody's recording.
Speaker 1: You transition.
Speaker 2: Who knows, who knows?
Speaker 1: Who knows?
Speaker 2: But I'm being open with mine, you know. And I
Speaker 2: said that to say, intentional with love and intentional with
Speaker 2: family because I left my which I still I'm still like,
Speaker 2: all right, I will leave anybody behind for my purpose
Speaker 2: and what God has called me to do. A mother,
Speaker 2: a granny, a friend, a sister. If God is calling
Speaker 2: me to this and you can't support me, you want
Speaker 2: me to choose. If He is telling me to do this,
Speaker 2: I will be obedient to him and leave my family.
Speaker 2: I will do that. But I wish that I made
Speaker 2: more intentional time for family time, which I'm starting to
Speaker 2: do now that I'm a little more established and financially
Speaker 2: free and i can.
Speaker 1: Travel wherever I want and do it in real time.
Speaker 2: But I would say those two things, intentional with family
Speaker 2: and intend to know with love because I believe whatever
Speaker 2: you're intentional with it's going to flourish and growth. Right,
Speaker 2: So I'm like, that's why I've been able to reach
Speaker 2: a certain level of success because I'm so intentional with
Speaker 2: what I do, so intentional, but with love and family.
Speaker 1: I'm starting to work love. I'm actually not not let
Speaker 1: me not. I have not started working on you.
Speaker 2: I haven't.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but family, Yes.
Speaker 2: And my sister moved to Atlanta, more time with her,
Speaker 2: trying to be more intentional with my relationship with my mom,
Speaker 2: seeing my grandmother more, just little things like that, see Grandma,
Speaker 2: go see Grandma.
Speaker 1: I know, I know, thank you for sharing that.
Speaker 2: I love that podcast episode when you share that you
Speaker 2: go and see Grandma. I you only got one one
Speaker 2: maybe too? Maybe? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Speaker 2: So I guess my next question to you is gonna
Speaker 2: be what's most important to you right now in your
Speaker 2: life in this space? And you said family, career of course, yeah,
Speaker 2: what else? Anything else that You're like this, everything else
Speaker 2: needs to take a back seat because I've had to
Speaker 2: sacrifice for two I wouldn't say a back seat. But
Speaker 2: my relationship with God has grown so much over the
Speaker 2: past year. I'm trying so hard to incorporate him more.
Speaker 2: I'm still breaking habits, yep, not waking up and grabbing
Speaker 2: my phone, praying, talking to him more, praise and worship
Speaker 2: more fasting more, doing all the things that I know
Speaker 2: have worked and got me out of a dark place
Speaker 2: and allowed me to have encounters with him. I have
Speaker 2: had an encounter with Jesus Christ. You, guys, I'm gonna
Speaker 2: look right at y'all. I'm telling you. I am telling you.
Speaker 2: He is the Way, the truth in the life. And
Speaker 2: if you give him a chance Jeremiah twenty nine thirteen,
Speaker 2: seek me and you will find me when you seek
Speaker 2: me with all of your heart. If you do that
Speaker 2: with all of your heart, you will find him. And
Speaker 2: I know that from experience. I don't know all the scriptures,
Speaker 2: I don't know the Bible from the beginning to end.
Speaker 2: I know my experience. So to answer your question once again,
Speaker 2: my goal is to incorporate Him in everything more just
Speaker 2: in seasons. Yes, I feel like it's like going to
Speaker 2: the gym, like a working out for two months.
Speaker 1: It works, and it it's like, oh I.
Speaker 2: Took a month off. I feel like that's the same
Speaker 2: with my spirituality. Okay, I'm trying to make it a
Speaker 2: lifestyle and not just okay, let me do this these
Speaker 2: two months, let me spend time with God. No, it
Speaker 2: should be my lifestyle. So I'm battling with that.
Speaker 1: I see you. I do the same.
Speaker 3: I have the same battle, and I also battle with
Speaker 3: how much I want to share. So again going back
Speaker 3: to the things that I don't necessarily let people know about,
Speaker 3: that's one of those things because I feel like it's
Speaker 3: very super personal and I don't need to be the
Speaker 3: person that's quoting every like you said, every scripture or
Speaker 3: in church every day, or singing every hymn or knowing
Speaker 3: everything to quote. But it's a personal journey and a
Speaker 3: personal relationship. And you said that you've experienced Christ. Yeah, personally.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Is that enough for you to know that you've done
Speaker 3: that or do you feel like you need to convince
Speaker 3: others of that encounter.
Speaker 2: I don't think my responsibility is to convince. I think
Speaker 2: God allowed me through it to testify, to let people
Speaker 2: know my experience and plant whether it's planting the seed
Speaker 2: or whether it's encouraging somebody to have a relationship with him.
Speaker 2: I do believe God. From twenty sixteen, from the moment
Speaker 2: I went viral to now almost a decade later, I
Speaker 2: am a total different person. Like I go back and
Speaker 2: watch my videos, I'm like, you put that on the internet.
Speaker 2: You dumb young guy can relate to that so much.
Speaker 1: Deval I was just talking about.
Speaker 2: They said, Man, if we listen to some of these
Speaker 2: old podcast episodes, the way you spoke, your mindsets, the
Speaker 2: way you felt about certain topics, and it's it's unfortunate
Speaker 2: in a way because the Internet is so forgiven, unforgiving,
Speaker 2: and you can just pull anything up at any random.
Speaker 3: Time time and it just lives there in this ambyss forever.
Speaker 3: And it's just like, man, I hope that, you know,
Speaker 3: ten years from now, people are not going to hold
Speaker 3: me to.
Speaker 1: The interview that we did now for example exactly, and
Speaker 1: we would hope not.
Speaker 3: And it's unfortunate that I feel like the public in
Speaker 3: general just can't embrace change or even respect evolution, respect
Speaker 3: the fact that people have the courage to publicly show
Speaker 3: their evolution. You know, have you ever had moments where
Speaker 3: you're like, you know what, I'm not doing this some more.
Speaker 1: Like this is just not for me.
Speaker 2: Hmmm. I don't think I was ever like I'm not
Speaker 2: doing this because I know this is my purpose. But
Speaker 2: I've definitely been like felt myself getting into that bitter, angry, hurt, sad, unforgiving,
Speaker 2: not like all of those things that I had never
Speaker 2: felt before. I'm like, I've never felt this, Like, I've
Speaker 2: never felt these emotions in this space where you're normally happy,
Speaker 2: mean yeah, yeah, like or I would look at somebody
Speaker 2: and be like, girl, you're beautiful. How are you not confident?
Speaker 2: I don't understand how beautiful women can't be confident. Then
Speaker 2: I had a moment where I was like, oh, shoot,
Speaker 2: I'm not confident in this season. So having more empathy
Speaker 2: and understanding emotions flow depending on what you're going through.
Speaker 2: So I've had a moment where I'm like, you know what,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna watch what I say. I'm scared to say anything.
Speaker 2: I'm scared to give my opinion and be myself on
Speaker 2: the internet because every time I myself it's twisted up,
Speaker 2: or it's somebody got an opinion, or I'm like, like
Speaker 2: you said take thirty seconds. I'm like, that's not what
Speaker 2: I said. I did not say fuck all the fruit.
Speaker 2: I did.
Speaker 1: I like apples. I said I like apples, and now.
Speaker 2: You're right because I don't. I didn't say I like oranges.
Speaker 2: All I did was say I like apples. I didn't
Speaker 2: say fuck oranges.
Speaker 1: Right for sure? Just trust me.
Speaker 2: But I'm like, oh, I literally have this conversation with
Speaker 2: God recently, Like I'm like, you told me to do this,
Speaker 2: you told me to do that, You told me to
Speaker 2: do this, and I did it. I've been obedient. Where
Speaker 2: are you at? Like I feel like I'm getting attacked
Speaker 2: for my obedience. He's like, you're not going through anything
Speaker 2: I haven't been through. Relax. He literally was like, relax.
Speaker 2: Everything you are going through that you think is so major,
Speaker 2: that's so minute, is not anything they haven't done to me.
Speaker 2: So be quiet, relax. So I'm just like I remember
Speaker 2: that in those times. I'm like, this is the cross
Speaker 2: I was meant to carry. Anything you're going through. God
Speaker 2: puts you in this seat for a reason. God puts
Speaker 2: you with your husband, with those boys that y'all are
Speaker 2: raising for an exact, not even a reason, for a purpose.
Speaker 2: See and be.
Speaker 1: I mean people have asked me all the time, what's
Speaker 1: your purpose? What's your purpose?
Speaker 3: And I'm just like, man, don't I don't know what
Speaker 3: it is? And this was me I mean as recent
Speaker 3: as maybe two three years ago, Like I just don't
Speaker 3: feel fulfilled. I feel like I'm doing the things I'm
Speaker 3: supposed to do. But not the things I was purposely
Speaker 3: supposed to do, if that makes sense. Wow, and like
Speaker 3: finding what that purpose is?
Speaker 2: I always been you're saying this in real time, in
Speaker 2: real time, Well, now I know, okay, Okay, I'm walking
Speaker 2: in my purpose. I didn't realize that it was simultaneously happening.
Speaker 2: I thought I was going to have this like major
Speaker 2: revelation at some point, or that you know, people who
Speaker 2: grow up or you say, you know, you've known since
Speaker 2: you were a kid, that this was my purpose. I
Speaker 2: was going to be famous, I was going to be
Speaker 2: in entertainment. I didn't always necessarily feel that. Did I
Speaker 2: want that? Yes?
Speaker 1: But the only thing I knew for sure that I
Speaker 1: wanted was to be a wife and mom. That was
Speaker 1: that was that knew that, and I knew that.
Speaker 2: Wow. And that's why for a while I felt guilty,
Speaker 2: felt feeling like my purpose can't just be being a
Speaker 2: wife and mom. Yes, my purpose has to be something great, Okay,
Speaker 2: But then I look at my family and I'm just like,
Speaker 2: what's greater than my husband and my four boys raising
Speaker 2: amazing black men? Purpose? Baby had? I had to like
Speaker 2: really sit there and be like, oh God, I see
Speaker 2: what you did here, I see what you did here,
Speaker 2: And then also having a revelation on stage one time
Speaker 2: in a live show when someone was asking me, what's
Speaker 2: next for you, Kadeen, What's next for you, Kadeen?
Speaker 3: And I'm like, what is next for me? And I'm like,
Speaker 3: wait a second, Why am I always looking to be
Speaker 3: to see what's next? Maybe I'm walking literally in my purpose?
Speaker 3: And do you know how many people come to deval
Speaker 3: and I at random times and say, you have saved
Speaker 3: my marriage. You have opened my eyes to a relationship
Speaker 3: with my mother or my father I didn't know could exist.
Speaker 2: You have made me change the way I parent my
Speaker 2: son or Dady. You have helped There's so many testimonies
Speaker 2: and stories that we get on a day to day basis,
Speaker 2: and I'm like, oh God, I see that's the prope
Speaker 2: go through all that, the fidelity of whatever all y'all
Speaker 2: talked at, all that, everything that we spurred that one
Speaker 2: person to share that story to plant that it was
Speaker 2: worth it.
Speaker 1: It made sense.
Speaker 2: It's purpose because it's not about us, It's about whatever
Speaker 2: God has called us to do to do, And it's
Speaker 2: just it's crazy how after a while you try to
Speaker 2: fight those things and you try to like you're in
Speaker 2: your own mind about what it looks like when God
Speaker 2: is literally like I'm showing.
Speaker 3: You the way, like you're walking in your purpose and
Speaker 3: what I have destined for you. Wow, it's crazy when
Speaker 3: you said that. The emotions that you feel. You know,
Speaker 3: sometimes when I asked about everyone to just give this up,
Speaker 3: feelings of just like bitterness and doubt and fear. Feeling
Speaker 3: misunderstood can have many different emotional and psychological effects. Typically,
Speaker 3: we talk about some facts and staffs to kind of
Speaker 3: back up our conversation on the.
Speaker 4: Show, So.
Speaker 2: Over the okay.
Speaker 1: Emotional responses.
Speaker 3: Feeling misunderstood can lead to feelings of dissatisfaction, annoyance, discomfort, insecurity, sadness,
Speaker 3: failure incompleteness, and disinterest. It can also make people feel unsettled, unheard, unseen,
Speaker 3: and can lead to heightened emotional.
Speaker 1: Responses, Oh I know, girl, girl, Okay, all.
Speaker 3: The things that we've experienced at some point, and I'm
Speaker 3: sure our listeners can relate to just just feeling like that,
Speaker 3: like damn, that's not how it was supposed to be,
Speaker 3: That's not how I intended it. But here I am
Speaker 3: self doubt feeling misunderstood can make people doubt their own choices,
Speaker 3: their actions, their words, which can then lead to even
Speaker 3: more frustration. And it can also compromise your sense of worth,
Speaker 3: your sense of empowerment. How have you pulled yourself out
Speaker 3: of spaces where you felt unworthy and and like you've
Speaker 3: lotched your power because I know that, like you said,
Speaker 3: God has really been a driving force.
Speaker 1: Staple better, girl, It's okay space. You can cry.
Speaker 3: Our eyes do cry sometimes, but you know, I know
Speaker 3: that you're rooted in your faith. And how do you
Speaker 3: pull yourself out of moments where you just don't feel
Speaker 3: like you're worthy, whether it's a good moment or a
Speaker 3: bad I'm not worthy of this or I feel powerless
Speaker 3: in this sense? Because I know that people listening have
Speaker 3: been in spaces maybe not publicly, but they're fighting their
Speaker 3: own private battles where I'm just like, I can't get.
Speaker 1: Out of this.
Speaker 2: It's that mind, y'all, the battle feel of the mind.
Speaker 2: Vienna got me on that book I started reading. I
Speaker 2: haven't even finished it, but pretty v my girl, your mind.
Speaker 2: Most of this stuff is in your mind, and it
Speaker 2: starts with the mind. Then it turns into action or
Speaker 2: a thought or a word. Or your thoughts turn into
Speaker 2: everything and it becomes manifested, good or bad. You have
Speaker 2: to take those thoughts like you have to shift it.
Speaker 2: It starts with your mind. That's what I've been working
Speaker 2: on so so hard, shifting. And I say it out loud. Now,
Speaker 2: if I start having bad thoughts, I have to start speaking,
Speaker 2: declaring and like, that is real. You have to shift
Speaker 2: your perspective. I said this on my podcast. We can
Speaker 2: both look at a glass and see, oh, this is
Speaker 2: almost gone. I'm like, well, no. An abundant mindset is
Speaker 2: like we almost to the top. Period, It's not almost gone.
Speaker 2: We almost to How we're gonna get more? And how
Speaker 2: are we gonna get more? Right? How are we going
Speaker 2: to overflow it? And a lack of mindset is like,
Speaker 2: oh my gosh, this is almost gone. We're about to
Speaker 2: run out. We're not gonna have nothing. That's the mind
Speaker 2: And once again backing up with a stat I don't
Speaker 2: I don't, I don't know the the full statistic, but
Speaker 2: I know this is a scientific fact, okay, because scientific's
Speaker 2: funny scientific facts that don't be scientific facts.
Speaker 1: So just so you know, for the record, this is
Speaker 1: an actual fact. This is actual scientific fact.
Speaker 2: I follow up preacher who is a psychologist on Instagram.
Speaker 2: I gotta find the page. But just saying that thoughts,
Speaker 2: negative thoughts positive or negative are building like bridges in
Speaker 2: your mind. If it's negative, it's building like negativity. The
Speaker 2: positive thoughts take those down and then starts building positive
Speaker 2: over here. It's scientifical, okay, but it's something there. I'm
Speaker 2: trying to envision the least boy Mom.
Speaker 1: Look at the legos and ship. How which way they go?
Speaker 2: Imagine all those negative thoughts. You have to build the
Speaker 2: muscle to break them down. It's just a muscle.
Speaker 1: It's like working out.
Speaker 2: It's a practice. So I'm telling you all this thing
Speaker 2: you're looking, how do I become confident? How do I?
Speaker 2: It starts in your mind because most of the stuff
Speaker 2: we think is in fact or truth anyway, I'm ugly, okay, perception,
Speaker 2: reception or who or I'm not worthy?
Speaker 1: Well, God, biblically God tells us are worth. You were this,
Speaker 1: you are this, You were this, you are this.
Speaker 2: So that's that's a lie anyway, anyway. But thinking lies
Speaker 2: all day, so you have to combat it with the truth.
Speaker 1: I love that being in the mind.
Speaker 3: You know what came to mind for me as you
Speaker 3: were talking to who you surround yourself with in those
Speaker 3: moments of feeling unworthy or feeling powerless, or feeling defeated,
Speaker 3: you're feeling misunderstood the people around you. You either rise
Speaker 3: to the occasion of the people around you or you
Speaker 3: stay staggering where they are. And one thing town, I
Speaker 3: really make sure that we do or just meet and.
Speaker 2: General, I'm surrounding myself with people who can pour into me,
Speaker 2: who can elevate my thoughts, who can teach me something new,
Speaker 2: who can speak.
Speaker 5: Life and positive people. I don't want to be like
Speaker 5: I'm around wives with folkids. She got to the door,
Speaker 5: she was just like, oh okay, I said, Oh y'all
Speaker 5: got money, Oh my god, beautiful.
Speaker 3: Family running around, just abundance love, And I pray that
Speaker 3: when people walk into our space and into they can
Speaker 3: feel that energy and that life and it's in effective.
Speaker 1: Yes, it was like inspectious, yes.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, but being around people who do that and
Speaker 2: making sure that the people who you're around as well
Speaker 2: want to grow with you. Not necessarily trying to get
Speaker 2: into the circles of people who have already attained, but
Speaker 2: people who are working on the same things as you
Speaker 2: and build with you and build together and not just
Speaker 2: trying to get to the top quickly, because everything.
Speaker 1: Is a process, right.
Speaker 2: Child.
Speaker 3: Physical and psychological impact. Feeling misunderstood can lead to higher
Speaker 3: perceived stress, lower life satisfaction and motivation and health, healthy
Speaker 3: cortisol slopes, belly fat, Oh this.
Speaker 2: I got had a six pack?
Speaker 1: Emma, I'm still working on farm over here.
Speaker 3: Trying to be given what they said they said, I'm
Speaker 3: trying to be giving BBL allegations and tell me took
Speaker 3: allegations all summer.
Speaker 1: Come on, all, could they already be like, hey, can
Speaker 1: he have a tappy sack? She don't got no stretch.
Speaker 3: First of all, it's okay if my mother had three
Speaker 3: kids in that one stretch mark on her body, not one.
Speaker 3: She had a big old table top booty, well not
Speaker 3: now because she's lost a little bit away, but she
Speaker 3: had a little booty on her and flat stomach and
Speaker 3: ads and everything. I'm like listening y'all, y'all about to
Speaker 3: stress me out, but my cortisol let us through the
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying that it's gonna be foop
Speaker 3: of forever. What to do when you're feeling misunderstood avoiding
Speaker 3: jealous people. While jealousy is largely normal, it will not
Speaker 3: serve you if the people around your resent your life.
Speaker 3: Have you had to eradicate your life of people who
Speaker 3: you felt like necessarily want the best for you?
Speaker 1: Absolutely?
Speaker 2: Absolutely?
Speaker 1: And what do you do at that point?
Speaker 3: Because I normally just pray for discernment to know or
Speaker 3: just forgot to remove those people from my life for
Speaker 3: whatever reason. And there's some people who aren't around when
Speaker 3: I look around and like, what happened to And you
Speaker 3: started to internalize it because you think it's you. I
Speaker 3: was like, did I do something wrong? So I've actually
Speaker 3: had a friend of mine who was like, I mean,
Speaker 3: really good close friend for years, and eventually she just
Speaker 3: kind of stopped communicating with me. And I went through
Speaker 3: this phase of you know, okay, dialing back, what happened?
Speaker 1: What did I do? What could I've said?
Speaker 2: What I have done?
Speaker 3: And then realizing after speaking to like a couple of
Speaker 3: her family members and friends, they were like, no, she's
Speaker 3: just on a different walk right now.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, all right, well I had to respect that,
Speaker 1: you know, And it was it was hard for me.
Speaker 3: It was almost like grieving this loss of a friend,
Speaker 3: a sister almost and I was like, man, I don't
Speaker 3: know what I did to deserve that.
Speaker 2: And I was like, you know what, God, you knew,
Speaker 2: I almost remember what you prayed for. You just prayed
Speaker 2: for discernments and to remove people places, absolutely things.
Speaker 3: At the same happen where you've have aid to say.
Speaker 3: You know, I can't just I can't be in communication
Speaker 3: with this person or absolutely.
Speaker 2: You know, family, friends, business partners that I'm gone in
Speaker 2: a business with like this, we don't want the same thing.
Speaker 2: You're chasing money, right, I know the money's gonna come.
Speaker 2: I am chasing purpose and I do this because I
Speaker 2: love it. I'm not chasing a dollar. I can't say
Speaker 2: yes to everything that has a dollar sign on it,
Speaker 2: you know. So I've definitely experienced.
Speaker 1: That for sure.
Speaker 3: And trusting your instincts, right that gut that God people
Speaker 3: say guts, so people say God, but paying attention to
Speaker 3: what your gut or God says because it pays off
Speaker 3: and it will avoid wasting time. Yeah, in certain circles
Speaker 3: that okay, that part, and surrounding yourself with people who
Speaker 3: don't judge you, like we said, the people who you
Speaker 3: hang around your circle it's natural to have an opinion
Speaker 3: or preference, but truly loving people who don't judge, they
Speaker 3: fully know that normal hypocrisy is intrinsic to being human
Speaker 3: and seek.
Speaker 1: The love with what they can. So thank you for
Speaker 1: the fact. Since that's triple.
Speaker 3: Devow says, triples name a certain kind of way, and
Speaker 3: I can say it right. Who's trouble our producer?
Speaker 2: I said, who is a website?
Speaker 1: Listen that that's what's sound like the website for sure?
Speaker 1: Oh my god, this is a great chat B. This
Speaker 1: is a great Chatski's coming.
Speaker 2: To an end. Get the house.
Speaker 1: It's all good. Let me tell you. People come here
Speaker 1: and they never want to leave.
Speaker 2: Ay, I know they never want to They.
Speaker 1: Never want to leave. But as you round out the
Speaker 1: this portion of the conversation is we actually have listener letters.
Speaker 2: I want you to stick around and just answer one
Speaker 2: or two, just give some tips, advice, our two cents
Speaker 2: and whatever the situation is. But as we round out
Speaker 2: the conversation about the evolution of B, is there anything
Speaker 2: you want to leave our people with knowing what's to
Speaker 2: look forward to as BE continues to evolve, Resilience, the Internet, people, things, addictions, habits.
Speaker 2: Negativity is gonna knock me down, and I'm gonna get
Speaker 2: up every time. And that's why I started the podcast.
Speaker 2: Let's try this again, resilient pivoting, figuring it out. You guys,
Speaker 2: be resilient, get up. Fight. Usually where you are lacking
Speaker 2: and where you're struggling and where the enemy is attacking
Speaker 2: you is where God is trying to use you. So
Speaker 2: fight got fight through that season. I will never stop.
Speaker 2: I don't care what the Internet says about me perceives
Speaker 2: me to be. I will go through those moments where
Speaker 2: I have to self reflect and I might be sad,
Speaker 2: I might be like, why are baby, I'm gonna get
Speaker 2: back up. I'm gonna keep fighting. So I just want
Speaker 2: y'all to know that and all the people that do
Speaker 2: support me and love me. I ain't going nowhere.
Speaker 1: Here on the way. That's a fact. That's a fact.
Speaker 3: Speak about being in the road devels, you know, filming,
Speaker 3: and he's you know, here and there and everywhere. So
Speaker 3: we're gonna have more moments like this where I'm sitting
Speaker 3: at with some of my favorite girls and guys and
Speaker 3: we're gonna be having some chats.
Speaker 1: But back to yes, I think we should.
Speaker 2: Y'all tell her, y'all want her to bring me back.
Speaker 2: There's so many things to talk about. We've only scratched
Speaker 2: the surface of the conversation. I'm looking forward to some
Speaker 2: more girl chat and live in the future. But we'll
Speaker 2: girl chat over some listening letters. Let's go pay some
Speaker 2: bills and we.
Speaker 3: Will be right back with more be some know brailliant darling.
Speaker 3: All right, and now we're back listening at the time,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna dive right in. We're gonna see what these
Speaker 3: people talking about today.
Speaker 1: We're supposed to give them advice, yeah, or you can
Speaker 1: just give your two cents on the story. It's not advice.
Speaker 1: Don't listen to me. I'm just gonna tell you my experience.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, Because typically they write in for dival and
Speaker 2: I okay, it's not like a dude like, YO, what
Speaker 2: should I do?
Speaker 1: Sis, We're going to defer to the well, we'll have
Speaker 1: to call on the phone a friend. All right, Hello
Speaker 1: to you both.
Speaker 3: I want to say that this platform you both have
Speaker 3: created has been a benefit to so many and I
Speaker 3: hope you continue a bigger realm such as the talk
Speaker 3: show Wink Wink.
Speaker 1: I received that in the name of Jesus, thank you
Speaker 1: so much.
Speaker 2: Why I can't hit shout out to treble, I said
Speaker 2: that better At this time, I'm a thirty six year
Speaker 2: old black mail. See there's a brother ricer like I said,
Speaker 2: I'm a thirty six year old black male who's looking
Speaker 2: to branch out on his own. I lived with my
Speaker 2: grandmother for fifteen years and I wanted to get away
Speaker 2: from under her wing. Well, in the midst of that,
Speaker 2: I've had three relationships which have failed and it caused
Speaker 2: me to move back with her. My income has decreased
Speaker 2: due to the heavy child support I pay, and now
Speaker 2: it's hard to afford a place to live.
Speaker 1: There's the kicker.
Speaker 3: I finally decided that I want to branch out on
Speaker 3: my own and live my own life. And when that happened,
Speaker 3: my grandmother passed. Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry to
Speaker 3: hear that.
Speaker 2: I know the feeling.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was left with almost thirty K, but it
Speaker 3: was all taken away due to my grandmother's signing a
Speaker 3: vehicle loan for me right before she passed, and it
Speaker 3: was done to offset the loan. Yikes, my credit is
Speaker 3: terrible and there's no one to co sign on the
Speaker 3: loan for me. I'm left with eight K from the
Speaker 3: sale of her home now right a whole lot that's
Speaker 3: with a k from the sale of her home, But
Speaker 3: I do have kids in a car loan, I have
Speaker 3: to still continue to pay and try to get refinanced.
Speaker 3: I'm confused because I don't know what to do and
Speaker 3: I don't want to fall back into my old patterns,
Speaker 3: which could be possible because there are women who constantly
Speaker 3: want to date me and want me to be with them.
Speaker 3: I'm making a conscious decision to say no, but when
Speaker 3: they extend help, I fall victim to.
Speaker 1: Help to the help that they provide.
Speaker 2: Because I have nowhere in caps to go and so
Speaker 2: little to take care of myself. I just want to
Speaker 2: create my own independence and create better and healthier habits
Speaker 2: and mindset. Please give me advice on where to go
Speaker 2: from here. I know you can't help everyone, but the
Speaker 2: advice is extremely appreciated.
Speaker 1: Thank you. Oh brother. This was a question for Develment
Speaker 1: because the loans and cars and this and that and
Speaker 1: what to do.
Speaker 3: But I can understand how he feels just being stuck,
Speaker 3: just being completely still up. So first off, I understand
Speaker 3: with the income coming in and then having heavy child support.
Speaker 3: Like I know a couple of people personally who this
Speaker 3: has just literally been the biggest setback for them, is
Speaker 3: having to every month shell out money for their children
Speaker 3: and then having nothing to themselves after that. And then
Speaker 3: you have grandma who passed away. This is such a loaded,
Speaker 3: loaded thing. Loaded, And then you don't want to be
Speaker 3: the guy right who is starting to like talk to
Speaker 3: women and date women. And then you know you're just
Speaker 3: the person that's there to receive whatever they're giving you,
Speaker 3: and not have you ever been in a situation where
Speaker 3: you were the person the kind of having to like
Speaker 3: take care of a guy or he was in a
Speaker 3: situation where he couldn't fend for himself.
Speaker 1: I flew a boy out one time, don't he got
Speaker 1: flewed out?
Speaker 2: It was so stupid. What No, I'm sorry, let's focus
Speaker 2: on this man.
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry.
Speaker 2: I triggered.
Speaker 1: I was triggered, all right, y'all to just say, you know,
Speaker 1: future man, make her mic. She's flewing people out.
Speaker 2: I think instead of focusing on the women that could
Speaker 2: help him, he just needs to take this time and
Speaker 2: focus vertically on God. I think he should fast because
Speaker 2: God will tell him what to do next. I truly
Speaker 2: believe in that. Okay, I think he should fast. What's
Speaker 2: the benefits you've seen from fasting?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 2: Personally, I never lived a fasted lifestyle until last summer.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 2: In every single time I fast, which have been four
Speaker 2: times in the past, well three times for five times
Speaker 2: within the past year, God has told me exactly what
Speaker 2: to do next. So if you don't know what to
Speaker 2: do next, just do the last thing he told you
Speaker 2: to do. Right, So I would fast, give up something.
Speaker 2: It doesn't always have to be food. I mean, biblical
Speaker 2: fasts are usually food. Yeah, because we create, we eat
Speaker 2: so much all day every day. Right, But I fasted
Speaker 2: social media. I mean that was an addiction for me,
Speaker 2: just scrolling and looking at the comments and liking and
Speaker 2: so whatever you feel like is consuming most of your time,
Speaker 2: your time, your life, Yeah, your lifestyle. Yes, be specific
Speaker 2: in your fast. Brother, I'm telling you, like, ask guys
Speaker 2: specific questions and just fast. And I'm telling you, either
Speaker 2: he'll speak through a person, he'll speak through a knowing,
Speaker 2: they'll speak through an idea, something might just That's how
Speaker 2: I came up with my podcast.
Speaker 1: I was fascining.
Speaker 2: So I mean he'll he'll I truly believe if he fast,
Speaker 2: God will give him the next step.
Speaker 1: I love that. Yeah, like you said, take it vertically.
Speaker 3: Sometimes it's not even about the people around you, the
Speaker 3: situations around you, because at first I was just like, shoot,
Speaker 3: maybe you need to like get a part time gig.
Speaker 3: I don't know what kind of money he's bringing in.
Speaker 3: You know, sometimes that's not even enough because you end
Speaker 3: up in this rat race of just trying to make
Speaker 3: money you can't do nothing else. Yeah, yeah, I've been there.
Speaker 2: I've been that.
Speaker 1: Take it vertically, brother, take it or showing your God
Speaker 1: will tell you what to do next.
Speaker 2: But now, when he tell you your job is to
Speaker 2: be obedient, it ain't always what you want to hear.
Speaker 1: You might have to cut somebody off right and have
Speaker 1: to walk away. You might have to leave a girl alone.
Speaker 1: You might have to He might say quit this job.
Speaker 2: You don't even know why, right, But if he tells
Speaker 2: you do it, I'm telling you whatever's on the other
Speaker 2: side of that is beautiful. Love that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, awesome advice. Thank you, Thank you.
Speaker 3: And to round out our listening letters, we have one
Speaker 3: more for the road. What's the word Kadina de Belle Well,
Speaker 3: could he ea be today? I just started listening to
Speaker 3: the podcast from January to present, and I've damn near
Speaker 3: watched majority of the episodes. I was introduced to you
Speaker 3: guys when I bought the book. Just want to say
Speaker 3: I appreciate all platforms.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much.
Speaker 2: So cool.
Speaker 1: I'm twenty four and my girlfriend is twenty but we
Speaker 1: have two brothers writing and today. Or it could be
Speaker 1: a girl.
Speaker 3: We don't know, because sometimes we have a girl, girlfriends
Speaker 3: and girlfriends. I'm twenty four, my girlfriend is twenty three.
Speaker 3: We've been together for seven years since high school. We
Speaker 3: went long distance for three of those years and eventually
Speaker 3: reunited and bought a house together. I say that to
Speaker 3: say I feel like we've always found ourselves back to
Speaker 3: each other because I know that she loves me, But
Speaker 3: damn I do not feel like I get the respect
Speaker 3: I deserve. Almost a year ago, I got into a shootout. Jesus, wait,
Speaker 3: what an actual you say? Okay, got into a shootout
Speaker 3: trying to protect her from an altercation, and I ended
Speaker 3: up getting shot six times, baby, get shot six times
Speaker 3: and losing my car in the process. Crazy part is yes,
Speaker 3: that you're living to tell the story. Crazy part is
Speaker 3: I am not from Houston where this happened, and I
Speaker 3: have no enemies. I'm from Chicago and I served in
Speaker 3: the Army for four years. It's ironic to me, loo crazy.
Speaker 3: The war zone in our cities are more dangerous than overseas,
Speaker 3: but that's not the topic. But knowing my girl was
Speaker 3: in the middle of a shootout, Jesus, I just went
Speaker 3: into protect mode. I woke up in the hospital seeing
Speaker 3: her with not a scratch on her. It made me
Speaker 3: very happy and relieved. I did not care how badly
Speaker 3: my body was damaged. I was just concerned about her.
Speaker 3: I know she loves me, and she wouldn't leave my
Speaker 3: side in the hospital, even when my family offered to
Speaker 3: watch over me so she could take a break and
Speaker 3: she refused. I always had respect for her, but seeing
Speaker 3: that side made me develop more.
Speaker 2: I don't feel like it's the same for her. When
Speaker 2: I speak my mind, I feel like it's met with
Speaker 2: her being reactive to what I say. I've attempted to
Speaker 2: change the way I speak to her several times with
Speaker 2: the same outcome. It feels like if I have an
Speaker 2: opinion that she automatically is labeled as sensitive or if
Speaker 2: I have an opinion, I'm labeled as sensitive. She gets
Speaker 2: upset as if she feels like I'm trying to attack her.
Speaker 2: I truly don't understand.
Speaker 3: Not gonna lie hurts because I feel like we both
Speaker 3: should be in a point where a mutual respect is
Speaker 3: considering what we've both been through. I kind of expect
Speaker 3: her to see how much I loved her after what happened,
Speaker 3: since it seemed like that she doesn't understand how much
Speaker 3: I care about her, but it does not seem like
Speaker 3: she does.
Speaker 1: I hate arguing.
Speaker 3: I'm very logical and I don't like to hold onto stuff,
Speaker 3: especially going through the experience almost losing my life without
Speaker 3: saying goodbye. I don't want to take it for granted. Oh,
Speaker 3: this is a good one for devout. Devout as a man,
Speaker 3: what's your thoughts at this point? I want to just
Speaker 3: close off option my opinions to her and just deal
Speaker 3: with it on my own CD as a woman, what
Speaker 3: do you think any experience with being reactive or defensive
Speaker 3: and how it changed? Appreciate y'all and please don't stop
Speaker 3: spreading y'all wisdom and love to the world. You answer
Speaker 3: that one, so first off, brother, I'm so sorry to
Speaker 3: hear that this even happened, that you were in a
Speaker 3: situation like this. It's funny because as much as they
Speaker 3: give us sometimes be it's like there's a backstory there.
Speaker 3: So we want to know, like, how did this altercation
Speaker 3: need to come to be? How did she end up
Speaker 3: in this shoe out? Like that's just not like a
Speaker 3: random argument. You didn't say a fistfight, No, exactly.
Speaker 1: It wasn't like an argument. This was like a full on,
Speaker 1: like could you have lost your life? Situation?
Speaker 3: So I'm curious to know, first off, how we even
Speaker 3: got there, you know, but I have been in situation
Speaker 3: to answer his question about as a woman, you know,
Speaker 3: being closed off to his opinions. For example, when Deval
Speaker 3: and I have discussions and he tells me how he feels.
Speaker 3: One thing I did have to learn was that I
Speaker 3: don't necessarily need to be defensive when he is expressing to.
Speaker 2: Me how he feels. How he feels is how he
Speaker 2: feels how he feels. And far too often we have.
Speaker 3: Not encouraged our men, particularly black men, to be open
Speaker 3: and vulnerable and say how they feel.
Speaker 1: It's like, you want the.
Speaker 3: Communication, but when they start to communicate, then we label
Speaker 3: them as sensitive. And Deval kind of got on me
Speaker 3: one time when he was saying how he felt about something,
Speaker 3: and I was just like, yo, I just don't want
Speaker 3: to hear you bitching and moaning about it, Jesus, And
Speaker 3: he was like, oh, so now I'm bitching and moaning.
Speaker 3: So you asked me to express how I feel, and
Speaker 3: I'm telling you how I feel, but now you're labeling
Speaker 3: it as bitching and moanings.
Speaker 1: What that does is it takes away from now you're guarded.
Speaker 3: Yep, yeah, he's guarded now, but it also takes away
Speaker 3: from his point and what he was trying to say.
Speaker 3: And I think that as women we need to create
Speaker 3: safe spaces or as partners or spouses in general and
Speaker 3: be when you get into a relationship, creating safe spaces
Speaker 3: for our significant others to really express how they feel
Speaker 3: without feeling like it's an attack necessary. And I think
Speaker 3: that that's what she's not doing for him in this space.
Speaker 3: Not sure how they communicate because also too, are they
Speaker 3: arguing with each other? Are they biggering?
Speaker 2: Are they just sitting down and having an actual conversation?
Speaker 2: Are we talking with the intent to get our point across,
Speaker 2: or are we talking with the intent to actually listen
Speaker 2: and understand. Like, there's just so many different working parts,
Speaker 2: especially within a relationship when you think about communication and
Speaker 2: considering someone else's feelings. So what I would encourage this
Speaker 2: young man to do is to first off, make sure
Speaker 2: that the approach that he's taken with this girl, because
Speaker 2: she may come across is feeling attacked or sensitive. To
Speaker 2: let her know that my intention is not to attack
Speaker 2: you ex or to diminish how you feel, or to
Speaker 2: make it seem like you've necessarily done something wrong. But
Speaker 2: these chain of events had led me to feel the
Speaker 2: way I feel, and the way I feel is the
Speaker 2: way I feel. That's not up for discussion because you
Speaker 2: can't talk me out of feeling the way I feel.
Speaker 2: What we can talk about is what you did that
Speaker 2: maybe got me there. But it's important to create a
Speaker 2: safe space where he can even just rest that. So
Speaker 2: my advice to you, brother, I'm not sure what Deval
Speaker 2: would say to you in this circumstance, but from and
Speaker 2: from me is to make it a space where she
Speaker 2: feels comfortable to say how she feels and encourage her
Speaker 2: to do the same for you and let her know
Speaker 2: that I did.
Speaker 1: I've been shot six times fore sis, I'm still here.
Speaker 2: Right and I'm still here.
Speaker 3: I am still here, So I'm still here and if
Speaker 3: you want me to continue to be here, we need
Speaker 3: to find a better way to communicate, and you not
Speaker 3: take things personally. Because you did something that made me
Speaker 3: feel away doesn't necessarily mean that you're a bad person.
Speaker 1: But we have to also talk about how we got here.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so good luck to y'all on that one, man,
Speaker 3: because that is a rough situation to come back from,
Speaker 3: a rough situation to come back. I feel like we
Speaker 3: might almost I have to talk to de Val about
Speaker 3: this one too, when we might have a follow up,
Speaker 3: you know, on a future episode.
Speaker 1: Where he can give his two sets of both of
Speaker 1: these listener letters.
Speaker 2: Yet, because these were both there, I think you would
Speaker 2: have some great on Yeah really, I didn't know ya.
Speaker 2: We get letters like let me tell you, I was
Speaker 2: like somezing chuckle, and then some were just like whoa,
Speaker 2: people are over here, man, it's people be going through stuff.
Speaker 2: And if you're still going through stuff, be sure to
Speaker 2: write us at dead as Advice at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: We want to hear from you. As a listener letter
Speaker 1: that's d E A d A S S A d
Speaker 1: V I C E at gmail dot com.
Speaker 2: Yeah. All right, So to round out the show before
Speaker 2: we let you go, we had this segment called the
Speaker 2: Moment of Truth, and it's pretty much just in summary,
Speaker 2: a recap of what you've gathered from this conversation, something
Speaker 2: you want to leave people with a quick takeaway.
Speaker 3: So it's almost like the sound bite in the beginning
Speaker 3: and then what we're doing at the end to wrap
Speaker 3: it up. So your sound bye in the beginning has
Speaker 3: something to do with being misunderstood. Still makes you kind
Speaker 3: of feel away sometimes and you're working through that. So
Speaker 3: after the conversation, it could be anything that we spoke about.
Speaker 3: What's your moment of truth?
Speaker 5: You know what?
Speaker 2: With the truth, I am.
Speaker 1: Committing to not giving up. Yes, I'm committing to that.
Speaker 2: I do it every single day day, admit to day
Speaker 2: and that it didn't didn't bother me either.
Speaker 1: I don't care. I don't care. I don't care it.
Speaker 1: Don't even read it.
Speaker 2: I know, I don't. You just post it, don't even
Speaker 2: read I post, and just.
Speaker 1: Don't even read.
Speaker 3: I may in the very beginning, like look through a
Speaker 3: couple of comments just to like engage really quick. But
Speaker 3: then I'm on to the next thing because I feel
Speaker 3: like when I post, I'm posting not for the way
Speaker 3: people are going to receive it, per se. I'm posting
Speaker 3: because I wanted to post that in that moment. I
Speaker 3: wanted to get that out, and I want to get
Speaker 3: that out and take.
Speaker 2: What you want from it. Leave it if you want
Speaker 2: to leave up negative comments, if you're not going through it,
Speaker 2: lead them. Wow, I leave it because usually shout out
Speaker 2: to my people who rock with me, they'll swarm and
Speaker 2: then before you know where that negative comment is going
Speaker 2: because it was probably something stupid and valid anyway to
Speaker 2: begin with.
Speaker 1: So I let my people handle up. It's like, you know,
Speaker 1: I got my people behind me.
Speaker 2: That no deal.
Speaker 3: They know my heart, they know my intentions, they know
Speaker 3: that we're fully transparent in so many aspects that it's
Speaker 3: like you can say the negative comment.
Speaker 1: But just know you're gonna be dealt with.
Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, you'll be dealt with.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm committing to this. I love that.
Speaker 3: I love that my moment of truth is to continue
Speaker 3: to stand in my truth, which is being unapologetic of
Speaker 3: who about who I am. If I am misunderstood, caring
Speaker 3: a lot less about that because just knowing that if
Speaker 3: I lead with authenticity, if I lead with being who
Speaker 3: I am, that it leaves room for people who want
Speaker 3: to believe otherwise to do that on their own time. Yeah,
Speaker 3: not on mind, Yeah, not on my wife. Yeah, period,
Speaker 3: I love. Okay, what's one thing you're dead ass about?
Speaker 1: It is like a new thing. I'm putting a pot
Speaker 1: when I have my people in sound a day with
Speaker 1: K I am dead ass about. I'm dead ass about
Speaker 1: loving myself.
Speaker 2: Yes, Like, look that's real because I'm realizing I have
Speaker 2: to work on self worth. But I've always had self love,
Speaker 2: like love, patient, kind about to I'm all of those
Speaker 2: things to myself.
Speaker 1: But I am working on self worth, self worth and
Speaker 1: self I've always had self love, but not self.
Speaker 2: Worth worth because if I knew my words, I wouldn't
Speaker 2: put myself in certain situations.
Speaker 1: That's a good one, that's all.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I'm dead ass about my self.
Speaker 3: Love and seeing this moment right now, I am dead
Speaker 3: ass about I'm dead that's about my joy.
Speaker 2: That's good.
Speaker 3: I'm dead ass about doing the things that make me happy.
Speaker 3: If it means that I'm gonna.
Speaker 1: Be in my bed for the day, for the day.
Speaker 1: May you find me there. I told my kids that yesterday.
Speaker 1: I'm like, listen, we got y'all, we got the food.
Speaker 2: Y'all done ate.
Speaker 3: I took y'all to get Italian icys. The semi finals
Speaker 3: are on for the NBA whatever. This is where I'm
Speaker 3: gonna be at. And what happened All four of them
Speaker 3: was in the bed with me.
Speaker 1: And that's my joy. Yeah, that's my joy. I am
Speaker 1: deadass about my joy.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 1: I love it all right, be telling them where they
Speaker 1: can find you. Baby Official.
Speaker 2: For all tour dates you guys, the b simone on Instagram,
Speaker 2: all platforms. And let's try this again podcast all about Rezili.
Speaker 2: It's growing. We have fun on there. You'll see my
Speaker 2: goofy side on there. Then you're gonna get my deep
Speaker 2: side because I still like to laugh and have fun.
Speaker 1: Oh for sure. We like a cohesion.
Speaker 2: You like a little bit of everything, a little bit
Speaker 2: of everything exactly. And y'all know where to find us Patreon,
Speaker 2: Ganggang shout out to y'all, Thank you so much. That's
Speaker 2: where you get exclusive dead ass podcast content. You also
Speaker 2: get a day with k content all day k ellis
Speaker 2: family content is lit over on Patreon, So if you
Speaker 2: haven't subscribed, subscribe so you.
Speaker 1: Can catch up.
Speaker 3: And you can find us on social media dead Ass
Speaker 3: the Podcast. You can find me at Kadeen I am,
Speaker 3: and you can find hubby even though he's busy filming
Speaker 3: and doing all the things being a whole ass actor.
Speaker 3: Come on, Leading Mail, Come on, my husband's leading Mail.
Speaker 3: I'll wait in for them to figure that out because
Speaker 3: I already know. I already know leading Mail. Okay, find
Speaker 3: him at I am Zavale. And if you're listening on
Speaker 3: Apple Podcasts, be sure to rate, review, and subscribe. Dead Ass,
Speaker 3: y'all would be simone.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Dead Ass is a production of iHeartMedia podcast Network and
Speaker 4: its produced by Donorpina and Triple. Follow the podcast on
Speaker 4: social media at dead Ass the Podcast and never miss
Speaker 4: a Thing