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Speaker 1: You know how many people told me it was impossible.

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Speaker 1: I remember one of my teachers told me I was

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Speaker 1: throwing my life away when I told her that I

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Speaker 1: was thinking about turning down my full scholarship.

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Speaker 2: To grab.

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Speaker 1: Grammy nominated artists.

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Speaker 2: Please give it.

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Speaker 1: Thank you so much.

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Speaker 2: What's the difference between wishing for something and manifesting song?

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Speaker 1: Wishing is one thing, but when you put your attention

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Speaker 1: on the intention and add strategy to it, that is

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Speaker 1: how you get to manifest.

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Speaker 2: If someone in the audience is feeling a low sense

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Speaker 2: of confidence, what's the first step to building that confidence.

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Speaker 1: Everyone comes from different walks of life. There is no

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Speaker 1: real right or wrong in this life. There's only a perspective.

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Speaker 1: Things can hurt you. When you understand yourself more and

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Speaker 1: you appreciate everything you have, you start to understand and

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Speaker 1: you don't take things personally.

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Speaker 2: You've always been so open about depression and anxiety in

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Speaker 2: a culture and in a art form that may not

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Speaker 2: always allow for it. How did you find a safe

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Speaker 2: space in doing the career you had in being Big

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Speaker 2: Sean the Rapper?

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Speaker 1: The commitment I made to myself for being authentic and sharing,

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Speaker 1: and when I started to go to therapy as a

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Speaker 1: black man. I didn't know it was such a taboo thing.

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Speaker 2: What you define success.

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Speaker 1: As Whatever you're doing on purpose is your purpose, as

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Speaker 1: long as it's with the purpose. The number one health

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Speaker 1: and Wellness.

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Speaker 2: Podcast Jay Shetty Jay Shetty, I am so pumped to

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Speaker 2: finally share the live interviews from my very first podcast

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Speaker 2: tour presented by Chase Sapphire Reserve. This next one features

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Speaker 2: a powerful conversation with Big Sean at the Met in Philadelphia,

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Speaker 2: one of the most thoughtful and inspiring voices in music.

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Speaker 2: I am so excited to be here tonight live at

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Speaker 2: the Met in Philadelphia with the one and only Big Sean.

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Speaker 2: Sean and I have been friends for quite a while now,

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Speaker 2: and I'm so grateful that he's here today to be

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Speaker 2: part of my first ever on purpose tour. And I

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Speaker 2: was so grateful that he let me write the forward

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Speaker 2: to his beautiful book Go. I saw some in the audience.

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Speaker 2: If you haven't got a copy, and I love to

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Speaker 2: see it. I love to see it.

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Speaker 1: No, thank you.

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Speaker 2: If you haven't got a copy, make sure you go

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Speaker 2: and grab one. It's truly a beautiful book. And you know,

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Speaker 2: when I first met Sean I was shocked as to

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Speaker 2: how much self work healing he'd done from the beginning

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Speaker 2: of his journey. This wasn't something he'd come into. It

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Speaker 2: was something he'd inherited and started so much earlier, and

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Speaker 2: it touched me so deeply. But Sean, before we get

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Speaker 2: into that, I wanted to start with what we've been

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Speaker 2: talking about tonight. And I know you were watching backstage,

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Speaker 2: but we've been talking about this idea about how we're

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Speaker 2: all limited by what we think people think of us,

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Speaker 2: and I wanted to share. I wanted you to share

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Speaker 2: if there was a time in your life where you

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Speaker 2: used to be worried about what you thought people thought

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Speaker 2: about you, and how that blocked your creativity and your spirit.

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Speaker 1: You know. I used to let the things I can't

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Speaker 1: control control me, you know what I mean. And it

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Speaker 1: was very conditional. It was something that it's impossible to

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Speaker 1: be successful in the business of pleasing everybody, like to

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Speaker 1: something that you might as well let go of now.

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Speaker 1: And if you do please everybody, you're probably not going

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Speaker 1: to be pleasing yourself, you know what I mean. So

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Speaker 1: I do feel that, especially in entertainment, and when you

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Speaker 1: get an opportunity to be you got to understand, like

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Speaker 1: since I was ten eleven years old, all I wanted

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Speaker 1: to do was like be a rapper. That was like

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Speaker 1: the only thing that I wanted. And I did super

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Speaker 1: good in school. I come from like a family of scholars.

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Speaker 1: My mom is an English and social studies teacher. My grandma.

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Speaker 1: First of all, my grandma was like one of the

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Speaker 1: first female black captains in World War Two. So she

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Speaker 1: was yeah, all right pee And she was like in

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Speaker 1: that other six Triple eight what the Tyler Perry made

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Speaker 1: a movie about. She was like a part of the

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Speaker 1: six Triple eight. So it was quite a you know,

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Speaker 1: I had quite a grandmother. But she she to her

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Speaker 1: education was the way to a better life, you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean. And my granddad was also in World

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Speaker 1: War two, And so I was somebody who I always

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Speaker 1: did good in school, you know what I mean, like

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Speaker 1: just out of respect. But I always knew that music

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Speaker 1: was what I wanted to do. And I had an

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Speaker 1: opportunity to like go to school or to pursue music.

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Speaker 1: I go to school on a full scholarship as well,

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Speaker 1: and I chose the music thing. And the beautiful thing

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Speaker 1: though about my grandmother and my family is that even

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Speaker 1: though I did the opposite, they still supported me. And

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Speaker 1: as a dad, now I see how important it is

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Speaker 1: to not control your kids or in that case, grandkids,

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Speaker 1: but to support them and to you know, give them

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Speaker 1: the fuel to say, hey, you could do anything you

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Speaker 1: want to do. Like you know, how many people told

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Speaker 1: me it was impossible. I remember one of my teachers

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Speaker 1: told me I was throwing my life away. When I

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Speaker 1: told her that I was thinking about turning down my

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Speaker 1: full scholarship to rap. She was like no, she was like,

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Speaker 1: do not blow it, like you know, and it took

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Speaker 1: so much faith and so much trust, and you know

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Speaker 1: that trust. It's like you, the letter you is right

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Speaker 1: in the middle of trust and you have to trust yourself.

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Speaker 1: It's like you are the one that's like right in

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Speaker 1: the middle of that trust. And it was just I

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Speaker 1: can go on and on about the story, but to

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Speaker 1: fast forward a little bit. And that's what this book

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Speaker 1: is like. Honestly, I'm not trying to sell my book

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Speaker 1: to you guys that like it's not doing being shameless plug,

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Speaker 1: But this book is like the wisdom of like my

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Speaker 1: whole family, the whole I was lucky enough to have

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Speaker 1: like family members like my mom who introduced me to meditation,

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Speaker 1: introduced me to strategize and told me like, look, if

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Speaker 1: you really want to make this happen, usualize and meditate,

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Speaker 1: close your eyes, like you write it down, journal it out,

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Speaker 1: you know, and it really, I mean, it really made

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Speaker 1: the world a difference. I would not be sitting here

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Speaker 1: talking to Jay Shetdy if it wasn't for that. And

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Speaker 1: that's the whole point of writing the book. And when

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Speaker 1: I did my first interview with him, he was like, yo,

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Speaker 1: you got to write a book. And I was like,

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's something I want to do later on.

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Speaker 1: And you realize how fleeting and how not promised life is,

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Speaker 1: and that when you have the wanting of something, when

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Speaker 1: you have the desire, I don't even like using want

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Speaker 1: that much because it acknowledges that I don't have it.

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Speaker 1: I like to think that I already have it. When

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Speaker 1: you have a desire, when you have a passion for something,

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Speaker 1: just do it as soon as you can, because nothing

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Speaker 1: is promised. We think we have this concept of time,

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Speaker 1: like oh, I got to like I'm old, Like that's

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Speaker 1: not all all the way true, and that's not a

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Speaker 1: bad thing. It's really not a bad thing. It's just

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Speaker 1: it's actually beauty in that. So for me, that's what

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Speaker 1: this book is. It's just kind of like for people

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Speaker 1: who may not be clear enough to how to get

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Speaker 1: to the next part of their lives, people who may

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Speaker 1: feel stuck, people who you know, we all go through

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Speaker 1: the ups and downs of life, and I feel like

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Speaker 1: this book is a great book of strategy to just

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Speaker 1: you know, something that I can't wait for my son

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Speaker 1: to read or pass on to people. You know. So

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Speaker 1: I'm really thankful for you for helping me do that. Man,

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Speaker 1: it means a lot.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I felt it immediately when we first spoke, and

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Speaker 2: I wanted to ask you the difference because I think, oh.

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Speaker 1: Sorry, but I didn't answer your question about controlling, so

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Speaker 1: my bad. I went off a little bit. Let me

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Speaker 1: answer that real quick quickly too. I won't take too

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Speaker 1: much time. Yes, there are times where I did feel

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Speaker 1: very controlled and trying to do you know, the idea

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Speaker 1: of what people wanted me to do, and it was

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Speaker 1: very depressing sometimes and sometimes it worked out. Sometimes it

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Speaker 1: was like, oh, thank god I listened to you. But

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Speaker 1: at the same time, it doesn't feel the same as

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Speaker 1: when you just listen to yourself. You got to let

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Speaker 1: go of the idea of succeeding and not succeeding. You

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Speaker 1: got to understand that it's all just a part of

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Speaker 1: the same journey. It's all like, you know, you may

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Speaker 1: learn more about winning by losing, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 1: It's like if the sun was sunny every day, you

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Speaker 1: wouldn't even appreciate it. It's the storms that make the

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Speaker 1: sunshine so much more. It's the ying and yang of it.

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Speaker 1: But uh, it's something that you should definitely keep in mind.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I was thinking about it as you were talking.

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Speaker 2: You know, we were talking about dreams earlier, and you know,

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Speaker 2: everyone in this audience got dreams, got ideas, got visions

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Speaker 2: of what their better life looks like. And I wanted

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Speaker 2: to ask you the difference between wishing and manifesting. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: what's the difference? Because I think a lot of people

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Speaker 2: are trying to manifest but then they're not seeing it,

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Speaker 2: and a lot of people might be wishing. So what's

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Speaker 2: the difference between wishing for something, wanting for something and

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Speaker 2: manifesting something.

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Speaker 1: Wow, that's a very good question. I think the difference

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Speaker 1: between wishing something and manifesting something is one is an

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Speaker 1: idea one is a dream, one is a concept. The

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Speaker 1: other one is everything that you've accumulated in action. When

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Speaker 1: you manifest something, you are in the middle of it.

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Speaker 1: You may not even realize it's happening. But I always

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Speaker 1: like to think of the energy of already having it.

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Speaker 1: It's like to me, that's already manifesting. It's like it's

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Speaker 1: the difference between being like you know, I really want

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Speaker 1: that car, that's like wishing it, to being like man

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Speaker 1: like the steer, like you get like smell it. You

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Speaker 1: know what I mean when you when you psych yourself out,

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Speaker 1: because your subconscious mind doesn't know the difference between what's

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Speaker 1: real and what you are feeding it, or what's real

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Speaker 1: to you. So that being said, when you meditate and

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Speaker 1: you visualize yourself on a beach with your feeding the sand,

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Speaker 1: your subconscious mind, which to me is the relationship between

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Speaker 1: you and God or the universe or whatever you believe in,

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Speaker 1: of manifesting it. Is one of these books I read

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Speaker 1: a long time ago, and it was talking about how

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Speaker 1: when you speak, there's these like crystals in water, and

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Speaker 1: when you speak to it positively, the crystals become these

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Speaker 1: beautiful looking like snowflakes. And when you speak to it

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Speaker 1: negatively when you say all these like you suck, you know,

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Speaker 1: all these things like that. It like the crystals like

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Speaker 1: look like damaged rocks. So you got to understand if

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Speaker 1: it has that effect on water, what are we seventy

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Speaker 1: percent made of water? Right? So it's really the power,

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Speaker 1: you know, when you manifest something, it's like the power

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Speaker 1: of your subconscious is so important to really focus and

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Speaker 1: feed that even if you don't, even if you technically

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Speaker 1: your logical mind doesn't believe it. If you just keep

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Speaker 1: feeding it, you'll see that you're a walking magnet. It's

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Speaker 1: going to show up in your life one way or another,

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Speaker 1: I promise you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that. I love that. I love that insight.

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Speaker 2: And I was thinking about it as well. I feel

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Speaker 2: like manifesting is being in love with the process, and

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Speaker 2: wishing is being in love with the result. And so

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Speaker 2: when you're manifesting, right, like when when you're manifesting, it's

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Speaker 2: what you said, you can smell the car, you're thinking

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Speaker 2: about the work you're going to have to do to

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Speaker 2: get it. Yeah, you're dreaming about waking up every day

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Speaker 2: and putting in the time because you know where it's going.

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Speaker 2: But you're obsessed with the process the process, and wishing

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Speaker 2: is just like I can't wait till I have it.

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Speaker 2: I wish I had it. Why did they have it?

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Speaker 2: I don't have it. They don't deserve it, and it

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Speaker 2: becomes all about the end. And the problem with that

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Speaker 2: is it just feels further and further and further away

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Speaker 2: and out of reach.

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Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, especially when you don't put a strategy to

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Speaker 1: the wishing. And I think once you put the strategy

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Speaker 1: to the wishing and the attention on your intention, that's

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Speaker 1: what turns it from wishing to manifesting. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: So that again, that was good. That was good that

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Speaker 2: you said it too fast.

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Speaker 1: I forgot you were rather yeah, attention and you know

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Speaker 1: I was, Yeah, I was saying that. You know, wishing

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Speaker 1: is one thing, but when you put your attention on

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Speaker 1: the intention and add strategy to it, that is how

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Speaker 1: you get to manifesting. That's the process.

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Speaker 2: I love that. Yeah. Yeah, that's everyone write that down. Intention,

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Speaker 2: attention and strategy or action. Like adding those three things together,

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Speaker 2: that's manifesting. Intention, attention and strategy and action. That's manifesting.

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Speaker 2: If you're trying to build something in your life. Sean,

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Speaker 2: what I love about you is that you've always been

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Speaker 2: so open about depression and anxiety in a culture and

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Speaker 2: in an art form that may not always allow for it.

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Speaker 2: Like generally you think of hip hop and rap and

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Speaker 2: music in general to be like on your set, to

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Speaker 2: be tough, to be strong. You know, you're battle rapping.

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Speaker 2: It's bravado, it's you know, and I love hip hop.

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Speaker 2: You know that of course, But there's that energy to

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Speaker 2: it because a lot of people here ooh so looking

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Speaker 2: for their voice to have a space to feel vulnerable,

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Speaker 2: Like a lot of people earlier were saying, we're so

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Speaker 2: grateful that this is a space we could be vulnerable.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes when you go to work, sometimes when you go

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Speaker 2: to your family, you don't have a space right to

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Speaker 2: be vulnerable. So what was How did you find a

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Speaker 2: safe space when it wasn't easy in doing the career

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Speaker 2: you had and being big Sean the rapper, How did

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Speaker 2: you do that? Where did you find that space?

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Speaker 1: I don't think it was a safe space. I just

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Speaker 1: looked at it as like it was like for me,

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Speaker 1: it was just the commitment I made to myself to

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Speaker 1: being real, to just like being authentic and sharing. You know,

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Speaker 1: when someone asked me about it, and you know, when

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Speaker 1: I was going through those ups and downs, like expressing

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Speaker 1: that on the song, you know, especially the song I

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Speaker 1: have Deep reverence with me and Nipsey Hustle to the

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Speaker 1: late Great Nipsey Hustle RP. Just being open about it,

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Speaker 1: and I didn't know it was such a taboo thing

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Speaker 1: as a black man, as like any of that, even

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Speaker 1: talking about like therapy. My dad. So, my dad, he's

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Speaker 1: from Monroe, Louisiana, and he used to get caught on

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Speaker 1: the wrong yeah, shout out to Louisiana. Okay, Yeah, he

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Speaker 1: would get caught on the wrong side of the train

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Speaker 1: tracks and get beat bad for us sometimes. You know,

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Speaker 1: it was in a around the Civil rights time, like

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Speaker 1: real bad times down there for him sometimes. And he

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Speaker 1: even had a speech impediment, like he had a stutter

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Speaker 1: when he was growing up that he was able to overcome.

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Speaker 1: But my point being is that when I started to

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Speaker 1: go to therapy, it inspired him to go to therapy.

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Speaker 1: And he was like, I didn't know. No one told me,

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Speaker 1: you know one of the things he said, and I

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Speaker 1: didn't really it means so much. He was like, man,

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Speaker 1: I love learning from It's awesome. When I can learn

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Speaker 1: from my son, and now that I have a son,

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Speaker 1: he teaches me. He's only two years old, but I

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Speaker 1: learned so much from him. I just feel like that

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Speaker 1: that's how the natural progression of it goes, you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean. But when I've initially shared like how

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Speaker 1: I was feeling, I don't know if it was a

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Speaker 1: quote unquote a safe space. It's just it's just the

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Speaker 1: route I chose to go, you know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it just needs to come out. It just needs

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Speaker 2: to cometimes. Sometimes what you're saying is, don't wait for

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Speaker 2: a safe space because it may never come.

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Speaker 1: It may never come, and so you just.

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Speaker 2: Go to kind of create a space where you can

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Speaker 2: start talking about it. Who is the first person you

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Speaker 2: opened up to deeply about it? Do you remember that?

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Speaker 2: Was it a therapist or was it someone else?

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Speaker 1: It was my mom? It was my mom because we

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Speaker 1: as close as I am to her, like me and

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Speaker 1: her relationship like started taking a real terrible dive when

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Speaker 1: I was just some like overdoing it with my career,

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Speaker 1: meaning that like I gave up all my hobbies. I

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Speaker 1: was just like strictly working. Because the concept when you

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Speaker 1: come from a city like Philadelphia, like or a city

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Speaker 1: like Detroit, it's like, oh, you got to stay on

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Speaker 1: they next. You gotta stay hot. Can't opportunity slip away.

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Speaker 1: You can't be one of those people that almost you know.

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Speaker 1: And even though it was like, oh, you have a

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Speaker 1: number one album, another number one album, this, that, like,

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Speaker 1: it just never felt like it was all the way

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Speaker 1: locked in. And I think that's because I was looking

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Speaker 1: at it the wrong way. And I'll come back to that.

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Speaker 1: But I remember just burning myself out. And I was

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Speaker 1: on tour in Europe. I'm not going to say who,

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Speaker 1: but somebody came up to me and was like, man,

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Speaker 1: you should try adderall right, And I was like, okay,

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Speaker 1: I never wasn't really familiar with adderall like that. He's like, oh,

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Speaker 1: you know, college students do it, like he was lying,

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Speaker 1: I'm a very smart person too, and he was like

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Speaker 1: it's just some like salts and things. I'm like, I

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Speaker 1: wanted to believe him, and I took it, and you know,

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Speaker 1: I'm not prescribed it like I don't need it per se.

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Speaker 1: And I was able to get more work done though.

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Speaker 1: I was like able to get more and I was

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Speaker 1: pushing myself more, and I noticed that it was like

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Speaker 1: really tearing my insides up. Like I looked like I

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Speaker 1: was on drugs, you know what I'm saying, Like hardcore.

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Speaker 1: I looked like just not myself. And anyway, I kept

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Speaker 1: doing it because it was working. I was seeing results.

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Speaker 1: I was getting the work done. I had another number

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Speaker 1: one album. I was able to finish it and do

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Speaker 1: another project with you know, with Janey, and we did

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Speaker 1: a side project and then another album, and I was

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Speaker 1: just like and then I did another album that same

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Speaker 1: year with Metro Booming, and it was just like all

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Speaker 1: of these things. But I really paid the price when

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Speaker 1: I hit like rock bottom and I went to the

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Speaker 1: studio and I realized when I didn't have adderall, I

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Speaker 1: felt like I couldn't do it. I couldn't make music

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Speaker 1: without it. And that's when I realized I have a problem.

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Speaker 1: I was like, I have a huge problem. And I

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Speaker 1: stopped it immediately, and I couldn't think of anything in

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Speaker 1: a depression. You know, I didn't realize that the synthetic

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Speaker 1: dopamine that was being created in my brain from that

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Speaker 1: when you shut it off, when you have a synthetic

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Speaker 1: version of it, your your brain start stops making natural dopamine.

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Speaker 1: So you're totally screwed. I'm talking about you are like

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Speaker 1: I like had a gun to my head. I was

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Speaker 1: like ready to blow. You know. I had like my

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Speaker 1: dream house in Beverly Hills. I had all these things

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Speaker 1: like beautiful, a beautiful life, unimaginable, and I wanted to

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Speaker 1: take it away because my mind was really playing tricks

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Speaker 1: on me and had me thinking that I was someone

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Speaker 1: that I wasn't. And that's when I opened up to

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Speaker 1: my mom. And I had not been talking to her

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Speaker 1: because I felt like I didn't deserve. I feel like

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Speaker 1: I didn't deserve to talk to my family. It was

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Speaker 1: the weirdest psychological twisted games I was playing with myself.

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Speaker 1: And I remember she suggested all these things, like you

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Speaker 1: know a good mom does, and she ended up coming

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Speaker 1: out and spending time with me and like help building

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Speaker 1: me back up. And that's when I really started realizing

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Speaker 1: how connected the body is with the spirit and with

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Speaker 1: the mind. And you know, I started working out, I

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Speaker 1: started seeing a therapist, I started slowly getting back into music.

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Speaker 1: I had to literally let go of everything I was

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Speaker 1: doing because just taking a phone call, just taking a

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Speaker 1: meeting was just too much for me. And I crashed out.

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Speaker 1: That was when I realized how bad I needed to

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Speaker 1: change my life. And I think we all kind of

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Speaker 1: come to a point in our lives where we go

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Speaker 1: through that in our own ways. It's like late twenties,

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Speaker 1: early thirties, maybe late thirties, and you probably probably a

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Speaker 1: few times in your life where this happens to where

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Speaker 1: it feels like you're gonna a wall is going to

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Speaker 1: fall on you and you either have to climb over

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Speaker 1: it or you're gonna get crushed by it, you know,

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Speaker 1: And it really feels that life or death and therapy

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Speaker 1: helped me so much. Being able to talk through with

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Speaker 1: someone and unload that amount of emotion and that amount

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Speaker 1: of reality helped because sometimes when you do it with

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Speaker 1: your friend or your family member, it stays between y'all

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Speaker 1: and then it's like, well, shit, they're going through their

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Speaker 1: own stuff, you know what I'm saying, And it's kind

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Speaker 1: of awkward, you know, when you get to like spilling

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Speaker 1: your deepest secrets or like, Mom, I had a gun

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Speaker 1: in my head. You know, I don't want to like

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Speaker 1: talk to her about that. And it took me some time,

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Speaker 1: but you know what I believed, I had faith in myself.

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Speaker 1: I trusted myself and that was that was one of

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Speaker 1: the deepest time where I had to connect with my

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Speaker 1: my spiritual self, my faith, and I have a great

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Speaker 1: relationship with Jesus Christ and with it with God and

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Speaker 1: and a great relationship with myself. You know, I rediscovered myself.

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Speaker 1: I tried new hobbies. I was like jumping out of

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Speaker 1: airplanes and like going to the gun range and just

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Speaker 1: trying all new things that I hadn't tried before, and

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Speaker 1: really watching anime like I'm a huge like anime lover,

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Speaker 1: and I just connected back with myself, you know.

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Speaker 2: Thank you for going there with the depths of yeah,

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Speaker 2: go for it, apps, thank you, go for it. You

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Speaker 2: don't even wanna be silent. I love doing this with you.

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Speaker 2: I feel like I should do every podcast with a

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Speaker 2: live audience.

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Speaker 1: Yeah listen.

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Speaker 2: I just want to take a moment to say how

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Speaker 2: much this means to me, because usually I spend my

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Speaker 2: time with a camera or when we're in the studio

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Speaker 2: and we've recorded multiple times in our studio together. But

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Speaker 2: sharing this with all of you and having all of

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Speaker 2: your energy here is giving me energy. So I just

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Speaker 2: want to say thank you to you all for first laugh, clap, cry,

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Speaker 2: whatever you want, like, that's what this is for. But first,

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Speaker 2: here's a quick word from the brands that support the show.

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Speaker 2: All right, thank you to our sponsors. Now let's dive

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Speaker 2: back in.

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Speaker 1: You know, one thing I do want to say, not

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Speaker 1: to cut you off, Jay, is that you know, I

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Speaker 1: was just looking at your mic and it's on purpose.

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Speaker 1: And one of the things people always ask me, and

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Speaker 1: I want to ask you this question two, how do

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Speaker 1: I find my purpose?

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Speaker 2: I love you too, I love you too?

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Speaker 1: How do I find my purpose? How would you answer that?

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Speaker 2: I'm going to share a meditation later that I believe

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Speaker 2: will do that, but in order to give a spoken

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Speaker 2: answer that doesn't come through with then I would say

434
00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:08,880
Speaker 2: that your passion is for you and services for others.

435
00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:12,240
Speaker 2: And so when you use your passion in the service

436
00:22:12,359 --> 00:22:15,840
Speaker 2: of others, it becomes a purpose. So when you have

437
00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:19,520
Speaker 2: something that you're passionate about, right, when you have something

438
00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:23,840
Speaker 2: you're passionate about could be anything. When you have something

439
00:22:23,840 --> 00:22:26,479
Speaker 2: that you're deeply passionate about, and then you use it

440
00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:30,439
Speaker 2: to improve other people's lives, that's what a purpose is.

441
00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,439
Speaker 2: But a purpose doesn't have to be your job. It

442
00:22:33,480 --> 00:22:35,800
Speaker 2: doesn't have to be what you do every day. It

443
00:22:35,800 --> 00:22:38,040
Speaker 2: doesn't have to make you money, it doesn't have to

444
00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:40,639
Speaker 2: make you famous, it doesn't have to get you followers.

445
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:43,720
Speaker 2: Your purpose can be something you do on the evenings

446
00:22:43,720 --> 00:22:46,119
Speaker 2: and weekends. Your purpose can be something to do that

447
00:22:46,160 --> 00:22:48,879
Speaker 2: you do take care of your children. Your purpose can

448
00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:52,080
Speaker 2: be so many things. And I think we limit ourselves

449
00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:54,840
Speaker 2: because the world today. You think about this for a second,

450
00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:58,880
Speaker 2: maybe like fifty to one hundred years ago, no one

451
00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:01,080
Speaker 2: would have asked the question and what do you do?

452
00:23:01,880 --> 00:23:06,359
Speaker 2: As the main question of conversation. Today, that's the number

453
00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:11,119
Speaker 2: one question because who we are defines our worth. We

454
00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:13,560
Speaker 2: live at a time where you say your career and

455
00:23:13,600 --> 00:23:16,040
Speaker 2: it defines who you are and what your worth is

456
00:23:16,040 --> 00:23:19,480
Speaker 2: in society. But that's not how God designed us, that's

457
00:23:19,520 --> 00:23:22,320
Speaker 2: not how the community designed us. In the past, you'd

458
00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:25,520
Speaker 2: be a farmer and a storyteller, yes right, you'd be

459
00:23:25,520 --> 00:23:28,760
Speaker 2: a mom and a doctor, you'd be a career and

460
00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:31,280
Speaker 2: you'd be whatever else it is. And so I think

461
00:23:31,320 --> 00:23:33,960
Speaker 2: we need to look at our purposes and this and

462
00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:37,560
Speaker 2: that and stop thinking of our purpose as a job title,

463
00:23:38,280 --> 00:23:41,640
Speaker 2: stop thinking of our purpose as a promotion, stop thinking

464
00:23:41,720 --> 00:23:45,120
Speaker 2: of our purposes. You know, what does our biography say

465
00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:48,719
Speaker 2: on Instagram? Like because I really don't like it when

466
00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:50,119
Speaker 2: everyone's like, so what do you do? And I'm like,

467
00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:53,280
Speaker 2: I don't want to say podcaster. There's a million podcasters

468
00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:56,320
Speaker 2: doing different things. I'm an author, but that's not who

469
00:23:56,359 --> 00:23:58,720
Speaker 2: I am. That's not my purpose. Same as you you're

470
00:23:58,760 --> 00:24:01,760
Speaker 2: an author, but you're an entrepreneur, you're a father.

471
00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:04,679
Speaker 1: Yeah. Someon when people ask me, like, what's how do

472
00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:07,679
Speaker 1: you find your purpose? It took me a while to

473
00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:11,240
Speaker 1: answer it. That was an amazing answer, by the way, man,

474
00:24:11,320 --> 00:24:16,040
Speaker 1: that's like right on. And I think a lot of

475
00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:20,560
Speaker 1: people tie their purpose in with their career. Right They'll

476
00:24:20,600 --> 00:24:22,560
Speaker 1: be like, well, I got to find my purpose because

477
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:24,280
Speaker 1: I got to find my way. I got to find

478
00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:26,600
Speaker 1: out how to you know what I mean? And I

479
00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:31,600
Speaker 1: realized that your purpose is what you're doing on purpose.

480
00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:36,040
Speaker 1: With purpose. It doesn't have to be like you say,

481
00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:39,600
Speaker 1: your job, that's a it can be there's no outlines

482
00:24:39,600 --> 00:24:42,680
Speaker 1: to it. It can be your job can be your purpose,

483
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:46,400
Speaker 1: your hobby can be your purpose. In fact, I feel

484
00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:48,560
Speaker 1: like one of my purposes is to be a son.

485
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:52,040
Speaker 1: One of my purposes is to be a father, whatever

486
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:54,679
Speaker 1: it is. Because it's whatever I'm doing on purpose is

487
00:24:54,760 --> 00:24:57,920
Speaker 1: my purpose. You feel what I'm saying like it doesn't

488
00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:01,840
Speaker 1: have to be so defined. And that's that's.

489
00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:04,560
Speaker 2: One thing that absolutely I'm so glad you brought that

490
00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:07,080
Speaker 2: up because I feel like there's a lot of pressure

491
00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:09,840
Speaker 2: around that word as well. Now it is because it's

492
00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:12,359
Speaker 2: got link to our careers, it's got link to our jobs.

493
00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:13,800
Speaker 1: A lot of pressure around purpose.

494
00:25:13,920 --> 00:25:17,120
Speaker 2: There's a lot of pressure around purpose, and it shouldn't

495
00:25:17,119 --> 00:25:21,240
Speaker 2: be that way because you're absolutely right that your purpose

496
00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:23,440
Speaker 2: today could just be to be present.

497
00:25:23,960 --> 00:25:27,560
Speaker 1: That could be a present for today. Whatever makes you happy,

498
00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:31,280
Speaker 1: whatever you're doing that you feel in your heart, whatever

499
00:25:31,359 --> 00:25:34,040
Speaker 1: makes you smile, whether you know, going to the movies

500
00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:36,920
Speaker 1: could be your who knows, like whatever it is that

501
00:25:36,920 --> 00:25:39,320
Speaker 1: that does it for you, That whatever you're doing on

502
00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:43,080
Speaker 1: purpose is your purpose as long as it's with a purpose.

503
00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:44,840
Speaker 2: Sure, And I was thinking about as we were talking

504
00:25:44,840 --> 00:25:47,679
Speaker 2: about that, you've been talking about being a father and

505
00:25:47,720 --> 00:25:49,439
Speaker 2: I wanted to ask you it feels like it's had

506
00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:53,040
Speaker 2: a big healing impact on you, and I feel like

507
00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:54,440
Speaker 2: it's got you do.

508
00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:57,080
Speaker 1: A lot of impacts on me. Yeah, for sure. You know,

509
00:25:57,720 --> 00:25:59,280
Speaker 1: I have a two and a half year old, So

510
00:25:59,359 --> 00:26:03,480
Speaker 1: I don't know if anyone knows what that's like. He's

511
00:26:03,480 --> 00:26:09,879
Speaker 1: the sweetest, most amazing kid. He's like enlightened being, you

512
00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:11,680
Speaker 1: know what I mean. So he teaches me all these

513
00:26:11,720 --> 00:26:16,560
Speaker 1: things without trying. So I'm just I'm appreciative of him.

514
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:19,359
Speaker 1: I'm embracing the unknown because as he keeps growing, he

515
00:26:19,440 --> 00:26:21,239
Speaker 1: keeps surprising me. So I don't know what it's going

516
00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:23,800
Speaker 1: to be like. He's only two. I can't believe we're

517
00:26:23,800 --> 00:26:25,639
Speaker 1: only two and a half years in. It seems like

518
00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:28,199
Speaker 1: he's I can't even hardly remember what it was like

519
00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:30,960
Speaker 1: without him at this point. So, yeah, you know, that's

520
00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:33,800
Speaker 1: how much of a presence he is in all our

521
00:26:33,840 --> 00:26:34,680
Speaker 1: lives for sure.

522
00:26:34,840 --> 00:26:37,160
Speaker 2: I want to shift the question that people usually ask,

523
00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:41,320
Speaker 2: especially young kids. Going back to our previous conversation about purpose,

524
00:26:41,640 --> 00:26:43,240
Speaker 2: people always like, oh, what do you want him to

525
00:26:43,280 --> 00:26:44,520
Speaker 2: be when he grows up? What do you want him

526
00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:45,800
Speaker 2: to do? And I want to shift it. I want

527
00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:48,440
Speaker 2: to ask you the question, what quality? If you could

528
00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:50,840
Speaker 2: choose one quality, do you really want to know where

529
00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:53,560
Speaker 2: to have when he grows up? What would you want

530
00:26:53,600 --> 00:26:54,280
Speaker 2: that quality to be?

531
00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:57,920
Speaker 1: His confidence? He has so much confidence. That's something that

532
00:26:58,560 --> 00:27:01,720
Speaker 1: I had to gain along the way way. You know,

533
00:27:01,840 --> 00:27:07,840
Speaker 1: my parents came from two families that they didn't really

534
00:27:08,320 --> 00:27:10,760
Speaker 1: have the confidence growing up. They didn't give me the

535
00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:13,480
Speaker 1: confidence because they didn't have it. They would always like,

536
00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:17,679
Speaker 1: I'm confident that I will always have whatever it is

537
00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:20,320
Speaker 1: I need to be the person that I strive to be.

538
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:22,840
Speaker 1: I will always have enough. It's a bund. There's enough

539
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:25,280
Speaker 1: for all of us. And that was a concept where

540
00:27:25,320 --> 00:27:28,400
Speaker 1: growing up, my mom and my dad both were like, oh,

541
00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:32,280
Speaker 1: you gotta work real hard. You know money, Oh, money

542
00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:35,280
Speaker 1: doesn't grow on trees. You know, it's it's not fair

543
00:27:35,359 --> 00:27:36,960
Speaker 1: out here. You know, these are type of things that

544
00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:40,080
Speaker 1: they would tell me. And that's not true. That is

545
00:27:40,680 --> 00:27:43,639
Speaker 1: an experience and they have also learned that that is

546
00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:48,359
Speaker 1: actually not true. I know all these sayings sometimes like

547
00:27:48,520 --> 00:27:51,080
Speaker 1: stick with us, right, like money doesn't grow on trees,

548
00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:53,520
Speaker 1: this and that, and you know, I saw my mom

549
00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:56,280
Speaker 1: crying over these bills and you know, me crying and

550
00:27:56,680 --> 00:28:00,640
Speaker 1: you know, growing up and it motivated me. But one

551
00:28:00,640 --> 00:28:02,280
Speaker 1: of the things they will always tell me, like even

552
00:28:02,280 --> 00:28:04,120
Speaker 1: when I got my license, my mom was like, make

553
00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:07,520
Speaker 1: sure like you take your hat off, make sure you

554
00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:09,920
Speaker 1: wear your hat to the on front you know, when

555
00:28:09,960 --> 00:28:12,320
Speaker 1: the police officer, if you get pulled over, make sure

556
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:14,800
Speaker 1: you have both hands on the wheel, you know. And

557
00:28:14,840 --> 00:28:17,320
Speaker 1: these are things that a mother should tell a black

558
00:28:17,359 --> 00:28:20,240
Speaker 1: man in America, especially in a city like Detroit, you know.

559
00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:24,119
Speaker 1: And so I understood it, and there's a lot that

560
00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:26,119
Speaker 1: comes with that. But I think that I had to

561
00:28:26,119 --> 00:28:30,040
Speaker 1: gain my confidence, and one thing that he has is

562
00:28:30,040 --> 00:28:32,200
Speaker 1: his confidence, and I'm just so proud of him for that,

563
00:28:32,640 --> 00:28:35,880
Speaker 1: and like he is literally the evolution. That's why it's

564
00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:40,000
Speaker 1: important for you to work on yourselves, for your family members,

565
00:28:40,640 --> 00:28:45,160
Speaker 1: even whether you have kids or not. Your energy is contagious.

566
00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:49,320
Speaker 1: It's gonna spread to your group of friends, your work group,

567
00:28:49,440 --> 00:28:54,120
Speaker 1: your family, your kids, and especially when you have a family.

568
00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:57,120
Speaker 1: It's like your DNA is like a computer chip. It

569
00:28:57,240 --> 00:29:00,080
Speaker 1: like has all this information in it, right, So it's like,

570
00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:03,480
Speaker 1: it's important to heal your trauma because you're passing it on.

571
00:29:03,760 --> 00:29:08,280
Speaker 1: It's important to heal your gut and your liver and

572
00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:12,040
Speaker 1: all these things because you're passing your genetically passing everything on.

573
00:29:12,160 --> 00:29:16,080
Speaker 1: They're they're parts of you and your partner combined, right.

574
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:20,000
Speaker 1: So I always looked at that and it taught that's

575
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:22,960
Speaker 1: one of the things my son taught me is that, Okay,

576
00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:27,800
Speaker 1: he'll smile like my grandmother, or he'll smile like Janey's

577
00:29:27,920 --> 00:29:30,080
Speaker 1: grand you know. It's like little things like that, And

578
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:34,680
Speaker 1: I realize that my grandparents. I always one of the

579
00:29:34,680 --> 00:29:36,160
Speaker 1: things with having a kid. I was like, I wish

580
00:29:36,160 --> 00:29:38,360
Speaker 1: I could talk to my granddad and like ask him

581
00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:41,480
Speaker 1: for advice. I wish I could talk to my grandma,

582
00:29:41,600 --> 00:29:43,760
Speaker 1: you know, all these people that aren't here anymore. And

583
00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:46,920
Speaker 1: I realize I can because the information is in my DNA.

584
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:50,120
Speaker 1: I just have to go within and really lock in,

585
00:29:50,680 --> 00:29:53,760
Speaker 1: and the answer is there, you know. And that's something

586
00:29:53,800 --> 00:29:56,680
Speaker 1: to always remember that we always think that the answers

587
00:29:56,680 --> 00:29:59,680
Speaker 1: are out there, but really the answers most of the

588
00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:03,640
Speaker 1: time are right where you are. That's what That's actually

589
00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:05,800
Speaker 1: the concept of the Alchemist, one of my favorite books

590
00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 1: as well.

591
00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:09,600
Speaker 2: Yeah that's real. That, Yeah, that's real. That's so powerful.

592
00:30:10,160 --> 00:30:11,800
Speaker 2: You just gave me chills when you said that. That

593
00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:14,800
Speaker 2: idea that we always wish we could talk to this

594
00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:18,880
Speaker 2: person or that person, but their history lives within us. Yeah,

595
00:30:18,920 --> 00:30:20,800
Speaker 2: that's a really really powerful idea.

596
00:30:20,840 --> 00:30:24,080
Speaker 1: That's why when people say, well, I'm living through you.

597
00:30:24,080 --> 00:30:26,840
Speaker 1: You know something, my dad always says he really, that's

598
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:28,360
Speaker 1: for real talk. That's real talk.

599
00:30:28,480 --> 00:30:30,440
Speaker 2: People are living with us and living through us at

600
00:30:30,480 --> 00:30:32,320
Speaker 2: all times. Yeah, and that's why we've got to be

601
00:30:32,360 --> 00:30:34,720
Speaker 2: so mindful as to what we pass on. If someone

602
00:30:34,760 --> 00:30:38,760
Speaker 2: in the audience is feeling a low sense of confidence,

603
00:30:39,600 --> 00:30:43,280
Speaker 2: low sense of self esteem, a low sense of even

604
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:46,080
Speaker 2: self worth, maybe they've been told they're not worth anything,

605
00:30:46,480 --> 00:30:48,600
Speaker 2: Maybe they've been made to feel that they're not enough.

606
00:30:49,280 --> 00:30:53,600
Speaker 2: What's the first step to building that confidence as an adult?

607
00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:55,920
Speaker 2: Like you said with your child, he he already has it? No,

608
00:30:56,040 --> 00:30:58,080
Speaker 2: already has it. You had to build it over time.

609
00:30:58,080 --> 00:31:00,520
Speaker 2: I had to build it over time too. What was

610
00:31:00,560 --> 00:31:04,719
Speaker 2: that first step in building real, true, deep confidence?

611
00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:08,920
Speaker 1: The first step was to understand that everyone is going

612
00:31:08,960 --> 00:31:13,880
Speaker 1: through something. Everyone has a story, everyone has a condition.

613
00:31:14,560 --> 00:31:18,360
Speaker 1: So I remember when I was nineteen years old and

614
00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:21,560
Speaker 1: it was a transitional time where I decided to do

615
00:31:21,640 --> 00:31:24,280
Speaker 1: music and turned down my scholarship right and a year

616
00:31:24,320 --> 00:31:27,320
Speaker 1: had gone by and I was a depressed person. It

617
00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:31,000
Speaker 1: was my first battle of depression because things weren't going

618
00:31:31,040 --> 00:31:33,640
Speaker 1: my way yet. It was God's timing. But you know,

619
00:31:33,720 --> 00:31:36,240
Speaker 1: you try and control the timing of life, and it's

620
00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:40,880
Speaker 1: like good luck with that. So anyway, I remember I

621
00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:43,760
Speaker 1: stopped to pump some gas at a place my mom

622
00:31:43,840 --> 00:31:45,800
Speaker 1: told me never to stop. And I was visiting my

623
00:31:45,840 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 1: girlfriend at the time that went to Michigan State. And

624
00:31:48,920 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 1: on the way from Detroit to Michigan State, there's a

625
00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:54,320
Speaker 1: place called how Michigan, and it's like one of the KKK,

626
00:31:54,560 --> 00:31:57,320
Speaker 1: Like it's like one of their headquarters, like not too

627
00:31:57,400 --> 00:31:59,960
Speaker 1: far from Detroit, which is one of the blackest cities,

628
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:03,720
Speaker 1: and it's like crazy right Jux's position. I saw that

629
00:32:04,240 --> 00:32:06,560
Speaker 1: the exit I had to get gas, and it was

630
00:32:06,640 --> 00:32:08,960
Speaker 1: like you know when you see the gas station right

631
00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:11,560
Speaker 1: off the freeway and it's like, I could I gotta

632
00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:15,000
Speaker 1: be straight if I just go right here and pump gas.

633
00:32:15,240 --> 00:32:19,520
Speaker 1: And I got immediately. I got off and I pulled

634
00:32:19,600 --> 00:32:21,880
Speaker 1: up to the gas station and like just pickup truck

635
00:32:21,920 --> 00:32:24,719
Speaker 1: pulls up and they're like you neg, you neg. I

636
00:32:24,800 --> 00:32:27,840
Speaker 1: was like what Like I was like it had me

637
00:32:27,920 --> 00:32:32,640
Speaker 1: like super just like damn, like for real, like that

638
00:32:32,640 --> 00:32:36,760
Speaker 1: that's where we're at, like just two thousand and whatever,

639
00:32:36,880 --> 00:32:39,480
Speaker 1: you know, So I'm like for real, Like I thought

640
00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:43,320
Speaker 1: it was like a joke almost And later on, as

641
00:32:43,360 --> 00:32:45,560
Speaker 1: I was learning more about myself. I'm like, I don't

642
00:32:45,560 --> 00:32:48,200
Speaker 1: know what type, what type of stuff they had going on, like,

643
00:32:48,280 --> 00:32:50,560
Speaker 1: what their upbringing was like, what their parents are like,

644
00:32:50,600 --> 00:32:53,240
Speaker 1: what they could have been abused, they could have just

645
00:32:53,480 --> 00:32:58,360
Speaker 1: not understood the concept and understood who I am as

646
00:32:58,400 --> 00:33:01,160
Speaker 1: a person. Right, So it takes a lot of growth.

647
00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:03,720
Speaker 1: But my point is to say, how do you build

648
00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:06,880
Speaker 1: confidence in yourself? Because that's a moment where my confidence

649
00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:12,400
Speaker 1: got beat to the ground. I felt like crazy, inferior almost.

650
00:33:12,440 --> 00:33:15,480
Speaker 1: You know, how you build your confidence up is you

651
00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:20,160
Speaker 1: start to understand and you don't take things personal. Don't

652
00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:24,680
Speaker 1: take things personal, you don't let things things can hurt you.

653
00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:27,520
Speaker 1: You can see obviously, I'm like still emotional about that

654
00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:29,640
Speaker 1: time because it was such a pivotal moment for me.

655
00:33:29,720 --> 00:33:32,320
Speaker 1: It's not because it's hurtful to me. It's because it

656
00:33:32,360 --> 00:33:35,360
Speaker 1: was a pivotal moment in my development as a man

657
00:33:36,120 --> 00:33:39,520
Speaker 1: that nothing like that could ever affect me anymore, because

658
00:33:40,440 --> 00:33:43,480
Speaker 1: I understand that everyone comes from different walks of life.

659
00:33:43,560 --> 00:33:45,960
Speaker 1: You feel me, they don't think they're wrong, they think

660
00:33:46,000 --> 00:33:49,400
Speaker 1: they're right, as wrong as it is to me. I

661
00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:51,800
Speaker 1: had to realize that there is no real right or

662
00:33:51,840 --> 00:33:54,920
Speaker 1: wrong in this life. There's only a perspective, you know

663
00:33:54,960 --> 00:34:01,280
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, So from my perspective I think is wrong, right,

664
00:34:01,400 --> 00:34:04,719
Speaker 1: but not from theirs. But the point is when you

665
00:34:04,800 --> 00:34:09,520
Speaker 1: understand yourself more and you appreciate everything you have and

666
00:34:09,600 --> 00:34:14,560
Speaker 1: you start building up yourself mentally, when you start to

667
00:34:14,640 --> 00:34:18,680
Speaker 1: understand that, Okay, some people will just talk smack about

668
00:34:18,680 --> 00:34:23,480
Speaker 1: you for retweets or for whatever, or for to be funny,

669
00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:25,560
Speaker 1: you don't take things as personal and that builds up

670
00:34:25,560 --> 00:34:28,200
Speaker 1: your confidence when you get to know yourself more and more,

671
00:34:28,560 --> 00:34:31,680
Speaker 1: and when you know that you are unstoppable. We have

672
00:34:31,760 --> 00:34:34,439
Speaker 1: the power of a whole universe in us. I say

673
00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:37,120
Speaker 1: that because when you look at it, you think of

674
00:34:37,160 --> 00:34:39,480
Speaker 1: all the stars in the sky. That's exactly how all

675
00:34:39,520 --> 00:34:42,799
Speaker 1: our atoms are, in our cells, in our bodies. They

676
00:34:42,800 --> 00:34:46,399
Speaker 1: make up this like magical type of miracle that's going

677
00:34:46,440 --> 00:34:49,360
Speaker 1: on in us, right that we have like completely taken

678
00:34:49,360 --> 00:34:52,640
Speaker 1: for granted. But it's like we have what it takes

679
00:34:52,680 --> 00:34:55,960
Speaker 1: to create anything. We're like products of God. God is

680
00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:58,719
Speaker 1: in all of us, right, So just remember that that

681
00:34:58,760 --> 00:35:02,440
Speaker 1: you do you can, man, you will, you know, if

682
00:35:02,480 --> 00:35:04,919
Speaker 1: that's what you believe, you will make it happen whatever

683
00:35:04,960 --> 00:35:11,160
Speaker 1: it is whatever. Nothing is off limits. If it was

684
00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:13,760
Speaker 1: off limits, you wouldn't even think of it. You wouldn't

685
00:35:13,760 --> 00:35:15,839
Speaker 1: even it wouldn't even be a thought to you. I

686
00:35:15,880 --> 00:35:16,680
Speaker 1: just want to get that out.

687
00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:19,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that. I love that take on confidence

688
00:35:19,480 --> 00:35:25,120
Speaker 2: because I believe confidence comes from noticing how many hard

689
00:35:25,160 --> 00:35:28,839
Speaker 2: things you've done and how many hard things you've been through.

690
00:35:28,880 --> 00:35:30,839
Speaker 2: Like that moment you just spoke about, that's not an

691
00:35:30,840 --> 00:35:34,279
Speaker 2: easy moment to live through. And like you said, I

692
00:35:34,280 --> 00:35:36,040
Speaker 2: can see the emotion in your eyes, and I think

693
00:35:36,080 --> 00:35:39,760
Speaker 2: everyone can feel it. But it's like when you notice that. See,

694
00:35:39,800 --> 00:35:42,920
Speaker 2: since we were young, we were only taught in school

695
00:35:42,960 --> 00:35:47,080
Speaker 2: to notice what you did well, what you got right.

696
00:35:48,160 --> 00:35:51,560
Speaker 2: You weren't taught to notice how you did hard things.

697
00:35:52,160 --> 00:35:54,000
Speaker 2: And I promise you in this room, each and every

698
00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:58,840
Speaker 2: one of you has already done ridiculously hard things. Maybe

699
00:35:58,880 --> 00:36:01,759
Speaker 2: you live through the death of a loved one, maybe

700
00:36:01,840 --> 00:36:06,120
Speaker 2: you lived through a divorce, Maybe you found yourself after

701
00:36:06,200 --> 00:36:09,879
Speaker 2: a breakup, maybe you were broke and found yourself out

702
00:36:09,880 --> 00:36:12,040
Speaker 2: of that, or maybe you're in it right now in

703
00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:15,839
Speaker 2: one of those transition moments. And I've found that those

704
00:36:15,880 --> 00:36:20,160
Speaker 2: moments of pain unlock your greatest potential because when you

705
00:36:20,200 --> 00:36:22,319
Speaker 2: can see yourself at that moment and you can see

706
00:36:22,320 --> 00:36:26,080
Speaker 2: that you've lived through it, So start collecting, start noticing

707
00:36:26,120 --> 00:36:30,360
Speaker 2: how many difficult, hard things you've done. I remember, I

708
00:36:30,400 --> 00:36:32,080
Speaker 2: don't think I've talked about it before. I remember my

709
00:36:32,120 --> 00:36:34,839
Speaker 2: mom saying something crazy to me. I was going through

710
00:36:34,880 --> 00:36:39,960
Speaker 2: a really hard time in my early thirties and a

711
00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:41,799
Speaker 2: really really tough time, and I was on the phone

712
00:36:41,840 --> 00:36:44,640
Speaker 2: to her, and my mom does not say motivational things

713
00:36:44,640 --> 00:36:47,440
Speaker 2: to me. My mom doesn't say demotivational things to me.

714
00:36:47,480 --> 00:36:49,640
Speaker 2: But she doesn't say motivational things to me. And my

715
00:36:49,719 --> 00:36:51,279
Speaker 2: mom doesn't give me advice. I don't go to my

716
00:36:51,320 --> 00:36:54,200
Speaker 2: mom for advice. I love my mom and I tell

717
00:36:54,200 --> 00:36:55,680
Speaker 2: her I love her, and she tells me she loves me,

718
00:36:55,719 --> 00:36:57,480
Speaker 2: and she just wants to know what I ate for dinner, right,

719
00:36:57,600 --> 00:36:59,759
Speaker 2: Like that's my relationship with my mom.

720
00:37:00,040 --> 00:37:02,080
Speaker 1: Well that's a way of her saying she loves you, right.

721
00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:04,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, And she loves me to bit like she loves me.

722
00:37:04,400 --> 00:37:06,360
Speaker 2: Her love has been a shield in my life. But

723
00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:08,000
Speaker 2: I'm on the phone too and she's like, how's things going,

724
00:37:08,040 --> 00:37:10,480
Speaker 2: And I'm like, you know, barely vulnerable with my mom.

725
00:37:10,480 --> 00:37:11,719
Speaker 2: And I was like, Mom, you know what, it's just

726
00:37:11,719 --> 00:37:13,480
Speaker 2: a tough time, you know, But I got my head

727
00:37:13,520 --> 00:37:16,200
Speaker 2: down and working hard. And she said to me, well,

728
00:37:16,239 --> 00:37:19,319
Speaker 2: you well, you're used to dealing with stress. And I said,

729
00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:21,759
Speaker 2: what do you mean, Like you never said this to

730
00:37:21,800 --> 00:37:25,040
Speaker 2: me before, Like when did you become a motivational speaker?

731
00:37:25,080 --> 00:37:27,959
Speaker 2: Like what do you mean? And she goes, she goes,

732
00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:29,960
Speaker 2: You've been used to dealing with stress. And I was like,

733
00:37:30,160 --> 00:37:31,640
Speaker 2: what do you mean, Like you've never said that to

734
00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:34,319
Speaker 2: me before. And I never share my stresses with my mom,

735
00:37:34,400 --> 00:37:36,640
Speaker 2: like you said, like she's not the person I'm talking to.

736
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:40,160
Speaker 2: And she goes, well, you dealt with so much stress

737
00:37:40,160 --> 00:37:42,600
Speaker 2: even when you were in my womb because of what

738
00:37:42,640 --> 00:37:44,880
Speaker 2: I was living through at the time. She said that

739
00:37:44,960 --> 00:37:47,560
Speaker 2: to me, and I was like, I was half in tears,

740
00:37:48,160 --> 00:37:53,239
Speaker 2: the other half was like full of like confidence. It

741
00:37:53,320 --> 00:37:55,799
Speaker 2: was like one of these moments of just like as

742
00:37:55,840 --> 00:37:57,800
Speaker 2: if like my whole self we was just like locked

743
00:37:57,840 --> 00:38:00,680
Speaker 2: back in together. And obviously I don't have any memory

744
00:38:00,680 --> 00:38:00,880
Speaker 2: of that.

745
00:38:01,160 --> 00:38:03,880
Speaker 1: I was a fat course, yeah right, And it's.

746
00:38:03,719 --> 00:38:07,680
Speaker 2: Say, but what's really fascinating is you've done hard things

747
00:38:07,840 --> 00:38:09,680
Speaker 2: even when you don't remember them, and you don't know

748
00:38:09,760 --> 00:38:12,960
Speaker 2: that and it's so important to remind yourself, and it's

749
00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:15,560
Speaker 2: so important to remind the people you love that they've

750
00:38:15,600 --> 00:38:18,880
Speaker 2: done hard things, because when you realize you've done hard things,

751
00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:21,279
Speaker 2: you can do harder things in the future. You find

752
00:38:21,320 --> 00:38:25,600
Speaker 2: confidence within them. So please today, look back at the

753
00:38:25,640 --> 00:38:29,600
Speaker 2: things you've broken through, things you've worked on, the hardships

754
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:32,880
Speaker 2: you've been through, and celebrate your resilience as a human.

755
00:38:32,920 --> 00:38:35,680
Speaker 2: You don't need to wait to become strong. You already are.

756
00:38:35,840 --> 00:38:36,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, embrace it.

757
00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:41,120
Speaker 2: Right, you already are, Yeah, embrace it. Embrace it. I wanna, oh,

758
00:38:41,120 --> 00:38:45,000
Speaker 2: thank you. I want to pivot slightly. This is something

759
00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:48,040
Speaker 2: we've been trialing and it's been beautiful, and this is

760
00:38:48,080 --> 00:38:51,960
Speaker 2: a real opportunity. So only say yes, only raise your

761
00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:54,879
Speaker 2: hand if if you really want to honor this opportunity.

762
00:38:55,480 --> 00:38:57,879
Speaker 2: We've been talking about stop caring what people think. We've

763
00:38:57,920 --> 00:39:00,800
Speaker 2: been talking about doing a hard things. We've been talking

764
00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:04,960
Speaker 2: about becoming more confident. We've been talking about taking your moment.

765
00:39:05,800 --> 00:39:08,200
Speaker 2: Seeing as we have one of the greatest of all time,

766
00:39:08,239 --> 00:39:10,640
Speaker 2: one of the best big show on the stage, I

767
00:39:10,680 --> 00:39:13,480
Speaker 2: wanted to ask you all if there's and I mean

768
00:39:13,520 --> 00:39:15,520
Speaker 2: this for real, if you truly, truly mean it. If

769
00:39:15,600 --> 00:39:19,400
Speaker 2: there's a spoken word artist, a poet, a rapper in

770
00:39:19,440 --> 00:39:22,160
Speaker 2: the audience who wants to come on stage for sixty

771
00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:24,840
Speaker 2: seconds and spit some bars for us so that we

772
00:39:24,880 --> 00:39:28,480
Speaker 2: can experience their greatness. If you really want this opportunity

773
00:39:28,520 --> 00:39:30,959
Speaker 2: to be your moment, I want you to raise your hand.

774
00:39:31,000 --> 00:39:34,000
Speaker 2: If there's truly a poet or spoken word art. I'm

775
00:39:34,040 --> 00:39:35,480
Speaker 2: looking at the back. Is there anyone at the back?

776
00:39:35,520 --> 00:39:38,560
Speaker 2: Stand up? If you saying hi, I'm just looking around.

777
00:39:39,320 --> 00:39:43,880
Speaker 2: Stand up at the back. Anyone at the back? There's

778
00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:45,839
Speaker 2: one there? Anyone else? I just want to make.

779
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:46,960
Speaker 1: Sure I see someone up there.

780
00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:49,160
Speaker 2: I want to get someone from the top. Whos Is

781
00:39:49,200 --> 00:39:51,480
Speaker 2: there someone back there? Only if you're going to honor

782
00:39:51,600 --> 00:39:55,879
Speaker 2: the opportunity, don't don't steal the opportunity from anyone you're

783
00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:59,799
Speaker 2: pointing at him. Come on down, come on down.

784
00:40:00,200 --> 00:40:05,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, Philly has like some of the best musicians.

785
00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:06,680
Speaker 2: That's what I thought.

786
00:40:07,719 --> 00:40:09,760
Speaker 1: That's all time, of all time.

787
00:40:10,160 --> 00:40:13,080
Speaker 2: I want it to know. Before we dive into the

788
00:40:13,120 --> 00:40:17,160
Speaker 2: next moment, let's hear from our sponsors. Thanks for taking

789
00:40:17,160 --> 00:40:19,920
Speaker 2: a moment for that. Now back to the discussion.

790
00:40:20,520 --> 00:40:26,000
Speaker 3: Okay, this is about being in a bad relationship. So

791
00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:30,040
Speaker 3: a real bad one. Okay, here we go, all right?

792
00:40:30,480 --> 00:40:32,839
Speaker 3: Why do I still love you when you throw beer

793
00:40:32,880 --> 00:40:36,000
Speaker 3: in my face, when I feel like you don't listen.

794
00:40:36,040 --> 00:40:37,560
Speaker 2: Or care what I have to say?

795
00:40:38,239 --> 00:40:40,240
Speaker 3: Why do I still want you even though you blame

796
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:43,080
Speaker 3: it all on me when you send me brutal messages

797
00:40:43,480 --> 00:40:47,439
Speaker 3: and constantly threaten to leave. Why is it I miss

798
00:40:47,480 --> 00:40:50,120
Speaker 3: you when all we seem to do is fight. Why

799
00:40:50,200 --> 00:40:52,160
Speaker 3: is it still you I want laying next to me

800
00:40:52,239 --> 00:40:54,839
Speaker 3: at night. Why do you come to me with your

801
00:40:54,920 --> 00:40:57,960
Speaker 3: issues when I can't come to you with mine. It's

802
00:40:58,000 --> 00:41:01,120
Speaker 3: because you listen to idiots all day with a preoccupations

803
00:41:01,160 --> 00:41:01,680
Speaker 3: and whining.

804
00:41:01,840 --> 00:41:02,719
Speaker 1: This was a therapist.

805
00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:06,440
Speaker 3: Why is it always my fault when I know you

806
00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:09,400
Speaker 3: play a role too? Why am I always begging? And

807
00:41:09,440 --> 00:41:13,000
Speaker 3: why can't for once it just be you? Oftentimes I

808
00:41:13,040 --> 00:41:15,080
Speaker 3: want to give up and just throw the towel in,

809
00:41:15,719 --> 00:41:18,279
Speaker 3: but I don't, And I love you but not enough

810
00:41:18,280 --> 00:41:19,120
Speaker 3: to wish I didn't.

811
00:41:19,880 --> 00:41:36,240
Speaker 4: Ah, thank you.

812
00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:43,840
Speaker 5: I'm feeling good, just very nervous. I listen to your podcast,

813
00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:50,600
Speaker 5: so I also I'd like to motivate people, okay, because

814
00:41:50,640 --> 00:41:53,320
Speaker 5: in life we're supposed to inspire those that need to

815
00:41:53,360 --> 00:41:56,319
Speaker 5: be inspired. And everybody needs to be inspired. You know,

816
00:41:56,400 --> 00:42:00,760
Speaker 5: we all go through life having problems and trauma an issue,

817
00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:05,120
Speaker 5: but deep down inside God is there. And I'm nervous

818
00:42:05,160 --> 00:42:07,600
Speaker 5: on stage, But every time I used to get on stage,

819
00:42:07,880 --> 00:42:11,799
Speaker 5: there was always nervousness and someone that deals with ADHD

820
00:42:12,000 --> 00:42:16,520
Speaker 5: and bipolar, and you know that's a survivor of many things.

821
00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:18,160
Speaker 1: Every single one.

822
00:42:18,040 --> 00:42:22,560
Speaker 5: Of y'all out there are special and y'all have something

823
00:42:22,560 --> 00:42:28,680
Speaker 5: inside of you. And I also wrap. I got a

824
00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:34,640
Speaker 5: little bit supper, Stay focused, never hopeless. Everything I do,

825
00:42:34,680 --> 00:42:38,320
Speaker 5: I move with motion. Should a bought a ocean pills

826
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:42,240
Speaker 5: and potions? What's all the commotion? Thought we were moving,

827
00:42:42,440 --> 00:42:45,400
Speaker 5: Let's go, this has past since this is my man

828
00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:51,480
Speaker 5: ofic and meso. Like Michael Angelo, I said, hello, picture me.

829
00:42:51,760 --> 00:42:55,200
Speaker 5: I said, sit down by the lake, plant me by

830
00:42:55,239 --> 00:42:57,920
Speaker 5: the sea, deeply loving the rain from above.

831
00:42:58,000 --> 00:43:00,000
Speaker 1: So my mom and dad, I love you.

832
00:43:00,400 --> 00:43:03,759
Speaker 5: We had some fallouts, but I had no doubts that

833
00:43:04,520 --> 00:43:06,600
Speaker 5: this is the light that God has called me too.

834
00:43:07,560 --> 00:43:15,719
Speaker 5: I'm making new revenue with the old in the new.

835
00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:25,359
Speaker 2: Way up I phil blast, Yes, amazing courage to come

836
00:43:25,440 --> 00:43:29,600
Speaker 2: up here and and go through that. It's it's nerve wracking.

837
00:43:29,600 --> 00:43:31,840
Speaker 2: When you actually get up here and you see everyone

838
00:43:31,960 --> 00:43:35,799
Speaker 2: and you look around and you know you can't find

839
00:43:35,800 --> 00:43:39,640
Speaker 2: it in your phone, And that's that's the reality. Yeah,

840
00:43:39,840 --> 00:43:41,400
Speaker 2: that's the reason why I wanted to do that, and

841
00:43:41,440 --> 00:43:43,200
Speaker 2: we've done it at a couple of shows this week.

842
00:43:43,320 --> 00:43:47,160
Speaker 2: Is it's the reality because the first time you do it,

843
00:43:47,160 --> 00:43:50,479
Speaker 2: it's never gonna be perfect. You know, like you're gonna

844
00:43:50,520 --> 00:43:52,520
Speaker 2: be shaking, You're gonna have your phone where you can't

845
00:43:52,560 --> 00:43:54,640
Speaker 2: find it, you're gonna be scared of the mic, You're

846
00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:57,480
Speaker 2: gonna be worried. Like that's the reality. And the beauty

847
00:43:57,680 --> 00:44:02,239
Speaker 2: is people just feel your period, right, people just feel

848
00:44:02,239 --> 00:44:04,120
Speaker 2: your energy. I think you felt that when you heard

849
00:44:04,160 --> 00:44:06,719
Speaker 2: Morgan you could relate to what she was doing. It

850
00:44:06,760 --> 00:44:08,560
Speaker 2: was beautiful and.

851
00:44:09,280 --> 00:44:12,560
Speaker 1: I really loved the concept she was saying too, Like,

852
00:44:12,840 --> 00:44:15,560
Speaker 1: first of all, you wrote a whole book on you know,

853
00:44:15,719 --> 00:44:19,240
Speaker 1: relationships and love and pertaining to that, and I wanted

854
00:44:19,280 --> 00:44:22,080
Speaker 1: to ask you, when you are per se in a

855
00:44:22,120 --> 00:44:25,440
Speaker 1: relationship with someone, right, that isn't beneficial for you? Right?

856
00:44:25,600 --> 00:44:29,680
Speaker 1: And it could be abusive in some ways depending on

857
00:44:29,680 --> 00:44:31,680
Speaker 1: how you look at it. Like you know, how Morgan

858
00:44:31,760 --> 00:44:34,600
Speaker 1: was describing her poem, like what advice would you give

859
00:44:34,680 --> 00:44:38,040
Speaker 1: to anyone who is dealing with a relationship of that

860
00:44:38,040 --> 00:44:40,040
Speaker 1: that they just can't seem to shake. And you know,

861
00:44:40,200 --> 00:44:43,040
Speaker 1: the funny thing about that is, like she even said

862
00:44:43,040 --> 00:44:46,200
Speaker 1: it in her poem that as bad as it is

863
00:44:46,239 --> 00:44:48,960
Speaker 1: and you separate, it's like you keep craving it back.

864
00:44:49,000 --> 00:44:50,440
Speaker 1: And I wonder why that is, Like why do you

865
00:44:50,520 --> 00:44:52,720
Speaker 1: keep craving it? Why do you only remember the good things?

866
00:44:52,800 --> 00:44:55,359
Speaker 1: Why do you kind of like put all the red

867
00:44:55,400 --> 00:44:57,600
Speaker 1: flags to the side. And you know, I feel like

868
00:44:57,640 --> 00:45:07,719
Speaker 1: that's a great question to ask you. Yeah, no, not

869
00:45:07,719 --> 00:45:08,520
Speaker 1: don't mean like that.

870
00:45:08,920 --> 00:45:11,359
Speaker 2: No, no, no, you know, when I think it comes

871
00:45:11,400 --> 00:45:16,160
Speaker 2: to love, the hard part is we all want to

872
00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:20,440
Speaker 2: be seen sometimes. The tough part is this is the truth. Actually,

873
00:45:20,480 --> 00:45:22,160
Speaker 2: I'm gonna I'm gonna go a bit deep on this

874
00:45:22,200 --> 00:45:25,080
Speaker 2: because I feel you deserve it and I feel you

875
00:45:25,640 --> 00:45:27,360
Speaker 2: or crave it and want it from me, And so

876
00:45:27,480 --> 00:45:29,879
Speaker 2: I'm gonna I'm gonna say how I really see it.

877
00:45:31,800 --> 00:45:37,720
Speaker 2: The moment you recognize that no human can truly see

878
00:45:37,760 --> 00:45:43,560
Speaker 2: you the way God and you can see yourself, You're

879
00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:49,919
Speaker 2: free because that was never their job. It was God's job.

880
00:45:50,920 --> 00:45:53,600
Speaker 2: Like when you recognize that you're the only person You

881
00:45:53,640 --> 00:45:57,799
Speaker 2: and God are the only people that really know everything

882
00:45:57,840 --> 00:46:02,320
Speaker 2: You've been through, everything you've lived through, every emotion, every breath,

883
00:46:02,400 --> 00:46:07,240
Speaker 2: every moment you spoke, every moment in silence, every single moment.

884
00:46:07,239 --> 00:46:10,040
Speaker 2: The only person who's documented that is you and God.

885
00:46:11,280 --> 00:46:14,640
Speaker 2: And so when you free people of the expectation to

886
00:46:14,800 --> 00:46:19,440
Speaker 2: understand you, fully see you, fully comprehend you, you free

887
00:46:19,480 --> 00:46:22,160
Speaker 2: yourself of having to do that for everyone as well,

888
00:46:22,600 --> 00:46:25,160
Speaker 2: because you know you don't have the capacity either. So

889
00:46:25,239 --> 00:46:28,120
Speaker 2: what it does is it creates greater trust and faith

890
00:46:29,000 --> 00:46:33,200
Speaker 2: in the divine in yourself, and it creates greater compassion

891
00:46:33,840 --> 00:46:36,760
Speaker 2: for others. And I think that's what we're all really

892
00:46:36,800 --> 00:46:38,880
Speaker 2: looking for. We just all want a bit of grace

893
00:46:39,800 --> 00:46:43,279
Speaker 2: from the people that we love that we can't understand perfectly.

894
00:46:43,960 --> 00:46:46,560
Speaker 2: We all want a bit of compassion for not always

895
00:46:46,600 --> 00:46:48,800
Speaker 2: showing up as our best selves even when we try,

896
00:46:49,320 --> 00:46:52,240
Speaker 2: because we know we're all trying, but we don't always

897
00:46:52,280 --> 00:46:54,920
Speaker 2: meet that mark. And so if we can offer more

898
00:46:54,960 --> 00:46:58,759
Speaker 2: grace and compassion to others, and we can offer more

899
00:46:58,800 --> 00:47:02,279
Speaker 2: trust and surrender to our God, I think that's where

900
00:47:02,280 --> 00:47:03,240
Speaker 2: real love starts.

901
00:47:03,440 --> 00:47:06,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, and honoring yourself too, Right, You've got to really

902
00:47:06,680 --> 00:47:10,000
Speaker 1: honor yourself in that, Like the strength it takes sometimes

903
00:47:10,320 --> 00:47:14,160
Speaker 1: to drastically change your life is nothing more drastic than

904
00:47:14,160 --> 00:47:17,120
Speaker 1: when you have to change someone you spend so much

905
00:47:17,160 --> 00:47:21,440
Speaker 1: time with by choice, not because they passed away, not

906
00:47:21,560 --> 00:47:24,600
Speaker 1: because of anything else, but because you need to better yourself.

907
00:47:24,600 --> 00:47:28,880
Speaker 1: And the strength that that takes, it's nothing to like

908
00:47:29,040 --> 00:47:32,920
Speaker 1: downplay or anything. So I think that comes from it

909
00:47:32,920 --> 00:47:35,400
Speaker 1: all comes back from working on yourself right and like

910
00:47:35,600 --> 00:47:38,399
Speaker 1: really being confident enough in yourself and all these things

911
00:47:38,440 --> 00:47:41,560
Speaker 1: we've been talking about to be strong enough to be you.

912
00:47:42,080 --> 00:47:46,960
Speaker 1: Because sometimes when you're in a relationship, you lose parts

913
00:47:46,960 --> 00:47:49,160
Speaker 1: of yourself and you guys kind of become this one

914
00:47:49,239 --> 00:47:52,680
Speaker 1: thing together. It's kind of like a factory when all

915
00:47:52,680 --> 00:47:55,920
Speaker 1: the lights are on, and sometimes you shut off certain

916
00:47:55,960 --> 00:47:58,160
Speaker 1: parts of yourself and like this gets shut down and

917
00:47:58,200 --> 00:48:00,200
Speaker 1: that gets shut down, and you're kind of just a

918
00:48:00,280 --> 00:48:04,600
Speaker 1: fraction maybe of like the person you were. So the

919
00:48:04,640 --> 00:48:07,960
Speaker 1: beautiful thing is is when you recognize that and you

920
00:48:08,000 --> 00:48:10,239
Speaker 1: split from someone and you turn on all these other

921
00:48:10,320 --> 00:48:13,520
Speaker 1: parts of yourself and you're like the full version of you.

922
00:48:14,000 --> 00:48:16,239
Speaker 1: I think that is the best version to bring to

923
00:48:16,320 --> 00:48:20,160
Speaker 1: a relationship, and that is how you know It shouldn't

924
00:48:20,200 --> 00:48:23,080
Speaker 1: be one half make a hole. It should be two

925
00:48:23,280 --> 00:48:26,239
Speaker 1: holes make something greater. You know what I mean?

926
00:48:26,480 --> 00:48:31,319
Speaker 2: So absolutely well said, thank you, Sean. You've done the

927
00:48:31,360 --> 00:48:34,080
Speaker 2: final five before on the podcast, I want to end

928
00:48:34,120 --> 00:48:37,600
Speaker 2: with one last segment with you. We call it Past, Present,

929
00:48:37,719 --> 00:48:41,080
Speaker 2: Future And behind you you're going to see a picture

930
00:48:41,800 --> 00:48:44,160
Speaker 2: pop up in a second. Can we get the first please?

931
00:48:44,600 --> 00:48:47,839
Speaker 1: That's back. Oh that's that's young Sean right there. That's

932
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:50,440
Speaker 1: a little Sean. Yeah, I was. I was a point

933
00:48:50,440 --> 00:48:54,120
Speaker 1: guard on the for my school and we actually want

934
00:48:54,120 --> 00:48:57,560
Speaker 1: a championship in the eighth grade in our league. And

935
00:48:57,680 --> 00:49:00,920
Speaker 1: you know, everyone thought, like all the parents would be like,

936
00:49:00,960 --> 00:49:03,000
Speaker 1: he doesn't look like he's in eighth grade, but I

937
00:49:03,000 --> 00:49:06,279
Speaker 1: look like I'm in eighth grade to me. Yeah. That

938
00:49:06,440 --> 00:49:08,439
Speaker 1: was man, that was some good times right there.

939
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:12,120
Speaker 2: What advice would you give to that younger part self

940
00:49:12,160 --> 00:49:13,440
Speaker 2: of yours in eighth grade?

941
00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:15,959
Speaker 1: Just have fun quick, get out your head so much.

942
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:20,480
Speaker 1: Just have fun and like you don't realize how young

943
00:49:20,520 --> 00:49:22,600
Speaker 1: you are when you're that young, you know what I'm saying.

944
00:49:22,760 --> 00:49:27,279
Speaker 1: Of just being care free, no bills, no like I

945
00:49:27,280 --> 00:49:29,680
Speaker 1: would just say, have more fun, have more fun.

946
00:49:29,719 --> 00:49:29,919
Speaker 5: Man.

947
00:49:30,120 --> 00:49:30,600
Speaker 2: I love that.

948
00:49:30,680 --> 00:49:32,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, quit being so hard on yourself.

949
00:49:32,560 --> 00:49:36,760
Speaker 2: All right, let's get the second picture. This is you today?

950
00:49:37,080 --> 00:49:39,239
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I want to.

951
00:49:39,160 --> 00:49:41,480
Speaker 2: Ask you, what do you need to hear right now?

952
00:49:41,680 --> 00:49:43,480
Speaker 2: What are the words you need to hear right now

953
00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:44,880
Speaker 2: in your heart and mind?

954
00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:47,160
Speaker 1: The thing that popped in my head, which I like

955
00:49:47,200 --> 00:49:49,319
Speaker 1: to go with naturally, as simple as it is, is

956
00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:53,680
Speaker 1: that it's gonna be fine as a as a man,

957
00:49:54,800 --> 00:49:57,960
Speaker 1: we always I don't want to characterize all men, and

958
00:49:58,600 --> 00:50:00,200
Speaker 1: I don't want to say this doesn't apply lot of

959
00:50:00,200 --> 00:50:03,680
Speaker 1: women as well. It does. I can only speak from

960
00:50:03,680 --> 00:50:07,759
Speaker 1: a man's perspective though, that we try and be the

961
00:50:07,800 --> 00:50:11,360
Speaker 1: head of the household and like provide and all these things.

962
00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:15,640
Speaker 1: And it puts a level of responsibility, which is something

963
00:50:15,680 --> 00:50:20,600
Speaker 1: that I am embraced. In turn always has to have

964
00:50:20,760 --> 00:50:24,400
Speaker 1: me do the self work I know, to like not

965
00:50:24,560 --> 00:50:27,560
Speaker 1: let it turn into anxiety and to not let that

966
00:50:27,600 --> 00:50:30,640
Speaker 1: turn into depression, because I can't afford that, you know,

967
00:50:30,719 --> 00:50:33,279
Speaker 1: I don't. It's something that I'm keeping far away from

968
00:50:33,280 --> 00:50:36,480
Speaker 1: my good energy and vibes. But the thing that starts

969
00:50:36,880 --> 00:50:39,279
Speaker 1: is the worry. And it's kind of what I would

970
00:50:39,280 --> 00:50:41,359
Speaker 1: tell my younger self, is what I would tell myself now.

971
00:50:41,440 --> 00:50:45,160
Speaker 1: Is to It's going to be fine. No matter what happens,

972
00:50:45,440 --> 00:50:46,560
Speaker 1: It's going to be fine.

973
00:50:46,760 --> 00:50:48,800
Speaker 2: This one I've been doing for all my friends this week.

974
00:50:49,960 --> 00:50:53,640
Speaker 2: WHOA with the help of AI. With the help of AI,

975
00:50:53,760 --> 00:50:57,400
Speaker 2: I've been surprising all my surprising all my friends this week.

976
00:50:57,840 --> 00:50:58,160
Speaker 1: Wow.

977
00:50:59,400 --> 00:51:02,239
Speaker 2: So how old do you think you are that Juan?

978
00:51:04,360 --> 00:51:08,480
Speaker 1: Wow, I would say, like, my dad's age like seventy

979
00:51:10,040 --> 00:51:12,480
Speaker 1: two three. My dad looks good for his age, so

980
00:51:13,080 --> 00:51:13,919
Speaker 1: like around.

981
00:51:13,840 --> 00:51:17,840
Speaker 2: Your dad looks great. Yeah, when you're that age, what

982
00:51:17,960 --> 00:51:21,320
Speaker 2: do you hope? You define success as.

983
00:51:21,320 --> 00:51:25,520
Speaker 1: Fun, fun, having fun. You got to have fun with it.

984
00:51:25,600 --> 00:51:27,680
Speaker 1: And that's one of the biggest pieces of advice I

985
00:51:27,680 --> 00:51:29,960
Speaker 1: could get to anyone is whatever you're doing, just you

986
00:51:29,960 --> 00:51:32,120
Speaker 1: can make it fun. You got a job you hate,

987
00:51:32,760 --> 00:51:35,080
Speaker 1: you got things that are the worst part of your day,

988
00:51:35,120 --> 00:51:38,160
Speaker 1: quote unquote the worst part, you can make it. How

989
00:51:38,200 --> 00:51:43,120
Speaker 1: you approach something literally changes the whole experience of you.

990
00:51:43,360 --> 00:51:45,399
Speaker 1: And that is one of the things like when you are,

991
00:51:45,520 --> 00:51:49,120
Speaker 1: like we were talking about going through hard times, like

992
00:51:49,800 --> 00:51:54,320
Speaker 1: embrace that, like, not only embrace it, celebrate it, because

993
00:51:55,280 --> 00:52:00,360
Speaker 1: that is just proof that you are experiencing parts that

994
00:52:00,440 --> 00:52:04,160
Speaker 1: are growing, pains, that you're growing into something. Right, and

995
00:52:04,200 --> 00:52:07,200
Speaker 1: that you not in alignment with whatever it is you're

996
00:52:07,239 --> 00:52:10,680
Speaker 1: going through. So just appreciate that because that, like I said,

997
00:52:10,680 --> 00:52:12,759
Speaker 1: I said this before, like that's just an indication that

998
00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:16,160
Speaker 1: you're meant for something greater. You're some different, some more,

999
00:52:16,760 --> 00:52:20,399
Speaker 1: and that's exciting. You know, life isn't all figured out

1000
00:52:20,480 --> 00:52:23,239
Speaker 1: for you. I mean, how boring would that be? You

1001
00:52:23,239 --> 00:52:26,160
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, if everything was just right in

1002
00:52:26,200 --> 00:52:28,480
Speaker 1: front of you and you knew exactly how to how

1003
00:52:28,560 --> 00:52:31,239
Speaker 1: it was going to go, Like, embrace that unknowing. Don't

1004
00:52:31,280 --> 00:52:33,759
Speaker 1: let it tear you down. Don't let it be a

1005
00:52:33,800 --> 00:52:36,359
Speaker 1: fear based way of thinking. You know. Remember, fear is

1006
00:52:36,400 --> 00:52:39,880
Speaker 1: just false evidence appearing real. Don't feed into it, you

1007
00:52:39,880 --> 00:52:43,040
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Like, have fun, make it fun,

1008
00:52:43,640 --> 00:52:46,000
Speaker 1: and know that anywhere you are on earth, that's where

1009
00:52:46,040 --> 00:52:48,120
Speaker 1: you meant to be at and you can have a

1010
00:52:48,160 --> 00:52:51,040
Speaker 1: good time with all the money, with no money, with

1011
00:52:51,160 --> 00:52:54,440
Speaker 1: all the with it whatever, with all the friends, no

1012
00:52:54,600 --> 00:52:58,000
Speaker 1: friends like there are, there's always a way to have

1013
00:52:58,080 --> 00:53:00,759
Speaker 1: a good time. So that's what I feel like, that's

1014
00:53:00,800 --> 00:53:04,000
Speaker 1: what ordered me, That's probably what would be on my heart.

1015
00:53:04,600 --> 00:53:07,239
Speaker 1: And you know, if I'm lucky enough to make it to.

1016
00:53:07,200 --> 00:53:12,879
Speaker 2: That give it up for big sure and everyone. If

1017
00:53:12,880 --> 00:53:15,360
Speaker 2: this is the year that you're trying to get creative,

1018
00:53:15,440 --> 00:53:18,000
Speaker 2: you're trying to build more, I need you to listen

1019
00:53:18,040 --> 00:53:20,960
Speaker 2: to this episode with Rick Rubin on how to break

1020
00:53:21,000 --> 00:53:25,160
Speaker 2: into your most creative self, how to use unconventional methods

1021
00:53:25,200 --> 00:53:29,040
Speaker 2: that lead to success, and the secret to genuinely loving

1022
00:53:29,080 --> 00:53:31,600
Speaker 2: what you do. If you're trying to find your passion

1023
00:53:31,680 --> 00:53:35,120
Speaker 2: and your lane, Rick Rubin's episode is the one for you.

1024
00:53:35,600 --> 00:53:37,840
Speaker 1: Just because I like it, that doesn't give it any value,

1025
00:53:38,160 --> 00:53:40,560
Speaker 1: Like as an artist, if you like it, that's all

1026
00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:41,560
Speaker 1: of the value.

1027
00:53:41,719 --> 00:53:45,080
Speaker 2: That's the success comes when you say I like this

1028
00:53:45,280 --> 00:53:46,759
Speaker 2: enough for other people to see it.