WEBVTT - Thomas Lennon

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<v Speaker 1>The Craig Ferguson Fancy Rascal Stand Up Tour continues throughout

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<v Speaker 1>twenty twenty four. For a full list of dates and tickets,

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<v Speaker 1>go to the Craig Ferguson Show dot com slash tour.

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<v Speaker 2>See you out there, the.

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<v Speaker 1>Greig Ferguson show dot com slash Tour. My name is

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<v Speaker 1>Craig Ferguson. The name of this podcast is Joy. I

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<v Speaker 1>talk to interesting people about what brings them happiness. Tom

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<v Speaker 1>Lennon is an American treasure. If you only know him

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<v Speaker 1>from his oiled legs, wearing shorty shorts and Reno nine

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<v Speaker 1>one one, then you probably know enough. But I know

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<v Speaker 1>a little more, and you're about to to have a

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<v Speaker 1>listen to this. We're gonna start talking about Tom Cruise.

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<v Speaker 1>That's how you know we started because we're going to

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<v Speaker 1>talk about Tom Cruise right away because I have something

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<v Speaker 1>to say about Tom Cruise and it's gonna happen.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not worried about it. You shouldn't be. Feel like

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<v Speaker 2>at this point, if I was going to get blowback

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<v Speaker 2>in my life from stuff I'd said and did, it

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<v Speaker 2>would have happened.

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<v Speaker 1>I hope that for me. Nah, I think I mean

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<v Speaker 1>there's like two and a halfs late night over there.

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<v Speaker 2>There's ship that I said, easily scrollable. There's gotta be

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<v Speaker 2>something in there. God gotta be.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, it's fucking two and a half thousand hours.

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<v Speaker 2>Gotta be. Yeah, no, it is. I mean we did

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<v Speaker 2>two but at least luckily you never wrote anything down. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know, man.

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<v Speaker 1>So here's what I was thinking, because we were we

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<v Speaker 1>You mentioned Tom Cruise because you and Tom Cruz are

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<v Speaker 1>the same height.

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<v Speaker 2>Identical, but yeah, we've hung out twice once with the

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<v Speaker 2>same height. One time we were definitely not How did

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<v Speaker 2>that happen? It was mid buckles my mind. I've thought

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<v Speaker 2>about it every single day since.

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<v Speaker 1>You know what, Here's what I think about Tom Cruise,

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<v Speaker 1>and then we're going to get back to how he

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<v Speaker 1>can bend the laws of physics. All is that I

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<v Speaker 1>used to like, say, you like derisive things, but Tom

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<v Speaker 1>Hughes and Tom Cruise and Tom Hughes, Oh yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>Tom Hughes is the worst man. So I used to say, like,

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<v Speaker 1>naughty jokes about Tom Cruise.

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<v Speaker 2>Your live.

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<v Speaker 1>Naughty jokes is your is your that's my thing. I

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<v Speaker 1>would say your million.

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<v Speaker 2>As they say in Quebec.

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<v Speaker 1>But I have a theory about that, right, Okay, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>So here's what I think about Tom Cruise. He's a

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<v Speaker 1>goddamn American hero and I and I approve of him

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<v Speaker 1>one hundred percent. Same here, and here's why he's crazy.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh sure, But but he doesn't make anyone else's problem. No,

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<v Speaker 1>he uses it to provide top quality entertaining into whatever. No, no, no,

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<v Speaker 1>And I I also wondered why I haven't been asked

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<v Speaker 1>but he Yeah, well there is that.

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<v Speaker 2>No, the best two times hanging out with that guy.

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<v Speaker 2>So what did you do hanging out with Tom Cruise?

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<v Speaker 2>One time? I did a table read with him, really,

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<v Speaker 2>which was neat What was the table read for? It

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<v Speaker 2>was a picture that never came out.

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<v Speaker 1>I've made a bunch of those, most films I've been involved,

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<v Speaker 1>it's never happened.

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<v Speaker 2>You wrote a couple of movies. I've read at least

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<v Speaker 2>a dozen that movies. I've been in a couple of movies.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not positive I saw them just because I heard

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<v Speaker 2>they were so bad.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I've got a collection of those. Yeah, Lady Wonder

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<v Speaker 1>Dog right there, off the top of my money, this

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<v Speaker 1>Landy the Wonder Dog is this a real picture. It's

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<v Speaker 1>a real picture, and I'm in it. I haven't seen it,

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<v Speaker 1>but it was.

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<v Speaker 2>Was it a theatrical picture?

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<v Speaker 1>I was certainly, I'm going I'm for sure when I

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<v Speaker 1>listening to the diffic A big board is a huge

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<v Speaker 1>word video? Remember that straight to video? It may have

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<v Speaker 1>been that. Oh, I'm on a couple of straight videos.

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<v Speaker 2>Sure. I got a picture on Rotten Tomatoes that's at

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<v Speaker 2>a zero. Okay, that's tricky. That pretty bad. What's that picture?

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<v Speaker 2>It's called? It's called Ottersville. It's with Michael Shannon, Ian McShane,

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<v Speaker 2>some good actors. You're kidding me, Judy Greer, Christina Hendricks,

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<v Speaker 2>Ron Pearlman. What Uh it's maybe just nobody voted? Oh

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<v Speaker 2>it's no, No, they did. It's an atrocious film. How

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<v Speaker 2>can that happen? Yeah? And we're all kind of bad

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<v Speaker 2>in it. But it's got to be the director of that.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's say that. Do you know what the say?

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<v Speaker 1>My worst results on I had on the Rotten Tomatoes

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<v Speaker 1>is I'm in that movie?

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<v Speaker 2>And I wrote the movie? Oh is it? Oh? Is

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<v Speaker 2>it a I'll be there, Oh I'll be there. Yeah. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>And I did write that movie? What is it? How

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<v Speaker 2>about is it? It's I think it's like fifty something, batter

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<v Speaker 2>you're shitting. That's magnificent. Is there is My Museum which

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<v Speaker 2>I wrote, and I'm pretty proud. That's a great movie,

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<v Speaker 2>thank you. It's at thirty four. Fuck up, that's nuts.

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<v Speaker 2>That's the world we live in. That's a great movie.

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<v Speaker 2>And now my my, so oh this is great. My

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<v Speaker 2>son Oliver, whom I love you, I don't love him, can't.

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<v Speaker 2>He's turned this on me now, it's amazing. So like, well,

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<v Speaker 2>he'll ask if we can go see a movie and

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<v Speaker 2>I'll you know, he'll be like, let's go see you know,

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<v Speaker 2>the Nun two or three, or let's go see. He's

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<v Speaker 2>in a very into horror and lots of stuff like this, right,

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<v Speaker 2>And so I'll check the tomato meter and I'll be like,

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<v Speaker 2>oh boy, I'm like, this sounds this one sounds like

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<v Speaker 2>a real drag. It's at forty you know two, right,

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<v Speaker 2>which is a splat.

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<v Speaker 1>Right yeah, splots sixty or something, oh.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah yeah, And he's like higher than that of

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<v Speaker 2>the Museum. Bro, Oh my god, I'm like, oh that's cold.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh my, that's good that I raised this, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>but this is the thing.

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<v Speaker 1>Though, to be fair, he's got an interesting position to

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<v Speaker 1>be only because your Dad at Night in the Museum

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<v Speaker 1>is and he knows it because he's not an idiot.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a fucking great movie. He's working the system. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>he knows that he can that the system is a

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<v Speaker 2>little bit rigged, and and that he can play that

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<v Speaker 2>against me.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, you know how you could prove that Night of

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<v Speaker 1>the Museum is a great movie. It's because Night of

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<v Speaker 1>the Museum too exists, right, and I wrote that right,

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<v Speaker 1>So if they don't let you do another one unless

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<v Speaker 1>the first one was totally awesome.

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<v Speaker 2>Or or anyway so that it was a table read

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<v Speaker 2>with Tom Cruise. So he did Night at the Museum

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<v Speaker 2>the table read. No, although he and still are very

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<v Speaker 2>close because they did Tropic Thunder, which I just let

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<v Speaker 2>that see. But uh so, if you want Tom Cruise

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<v Speaker 2>doesn't he won't read a script. Okay, it's not the

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<v Speaker 2>way it works. Well, he's dyslexic. Yeah, apparently it's dyslexia,

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<v Speaker 2>which I found very hard to believe because at the

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<v Speaker 2>table read of a script he's never seen. Yeah, he

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<v Speaker 2>gave an amazing performance. Yeah, I have movie star performance.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah maybe, Yeah, you're sure he hadn't walked through it

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<v Speaker 1>with someone.

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<v Speaker 2>Here to my hand, to god. He everyone tells you,

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<v Speaker 2>they're like, he won't read it. He doesn't want to

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<v Speaker 2>read it, right, he wants to put a table together

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<v Speaker 2>and it'll they'll cast the best person for every part, right,

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<v Speaker 2>tru I believe it. I had a very small part.

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<v Speaker 2>I refuse to believe that. But uh Ian.

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<v Speaker 1>McShane also with that one, Ian mc senat.

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<v Speaker 2>He's a great actor. He's a great actor, not scary

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<v Speaker 2>in person as he as you think.

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<v Speaker 1>He's like al swearing jing and oh god, he's so scary,

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<v Speaker 1>masterpiece dead would he's.

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<v Speaker 2>One of the scariest guys. And then he's a real doll.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah you know he's loving man.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah yeah, but that happens he's acting.

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<v Speaker 2>He's just it's just pretending to You should know that man.

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<v Speaker 2>Now there's people that are seem so scary and then

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<v Speaker 2>you meet them and they're a doll. And Nally Vincent

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<v Speaker 2>Price was like that doll. Yeah yeah, because you know

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<v Speaker 2>he he scared me when I was a kid. Then

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<v Speaker 2>there's big but you meete who are exactly a scary.

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<v Speaker 1>There are people who are meant to be nice. Then

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<v Speaker 1>you meet them and they are fucking.

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<v Speaker 2>It wasn't. It wasn't an asshole, but he's scared the

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<v Speaker 2>sh I met Kendal Fenian and Las Vegas. Right. He

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<v Speaker 2>yelled at me, what why it? It wasn't.

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<v Speaker 1>It was a rough night for everybody, okay, and will

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<v Speaker 1>you you guys drink in non?

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<v Speaker 2>Not together?

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<v Speaker 3>No.

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<v Speaker 2>But I'd taken his friend away for a little while

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<v Speaker 2>to go see George Lopez, and then I brought him back.

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<v Speaker 2>It was part of the big they'd moved the Aspen

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<v Speaker 2>Comedy Festival to Vegas, right, And uh, it was when

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<v Speaker 2>Sopranos is the biggest show in the world.

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<v Speaker 1>I remember I wouldn't have any of the Sopranos on

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<v Speaker 1>my late night show because I loved the show so much.

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<v Speaker 2>You don't want to ruin it. I didn't want to

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<v Speaker 2>break it. Don't want to ruin it. So Jenny and

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<v Speaker 2>I my my wife and are at Caesar's. We're doing

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<v Speaker 2>the festival, and we come down the elevator and who's

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<v Speaker 2>walking by with a foot long cigar and roll like

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<v Speaker 2>a thousand, one hundred dollars bills and that he's counting. Gandelphini.

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<v Speaker 2>I love this and I'm like, and my shows were

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<v Speaker 2>done on I'd probably had a glass or two of wine.

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<v Speaker 2>Am I do we just follow him to see where

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<v Speaker 2>he's going? Yeah, so we did. Maybe he thought you

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<v Speaker 2>were the Feds. He might have, but this was a

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<v Speaker 2>real trip. Speaking of how much you love the show,

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<v Speaker 2>don't Meet your Heroes. Followed Gandalfini through the casino to

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<v Speaker 2>where he was going to the high stakes blackjack area,

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<v Speaker 2>and the guy that he's meeting start waves hello to me,

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<v Speaker 2>and Jenny is like, Jenny Hi, And we forgot that

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<v Speaker 2>we had a mutual friend with Gandelfini. This guy, Gandelfini

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<v Speaker 2>is playing blackjack at a table with Michael Impiliodie, the

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<v Speaker 2>guy who is Johnny Sack, Johnny Sack, Polly Walnuts and

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<v Speaker 2>like little Stephen. This is crazy. Sure, this is an episode.

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<v Speaker 2>It was the HBO Festival, so they'd put everybody and

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<v Speaker 2>gave him a thing. YadA, YadA, YadA. It was really

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<v Speaker 2>insane to see all those guys together. Later on, I

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<v Speaker 2>had to go tell Gandalfini where his friend had gone to,

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<v Speaker 2>and I guess he'd had a really bad night at

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<v Speaker 2>the blackjack table and he was screaming at the concierge

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<v Speaker 2>at the Caesars really.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, this is before smartphones, so yeah, yeah, like a

0:10:08.679 --> 0:10:09.760
<v Speaker 1>twenty something kid is that.

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<v Speaker 2>He was like, oh, I mister, you know so uh gnafen,

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<v Speaker 2>he's yelling at the the concierge. Was he yelling at him?

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<v Speaker 2>I think he thought that the black jacks the table

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<v Speaker 2>was rigged.

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<v Speaker 4>So he was a little toasted that as well, which,

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<v Speaker 4>by the way, black Chuck is rigged. It's it's I mean,

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<v Speaker 4>it's just the odds. Yeah, the whole thing is rigged.

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<v Speaker 4>You're going it is rigged.

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<v Speaker 2>You're gonna lose. Yeah, that's just math. But so he

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<v Speaker 2>was yelling at the young employee at the thing about

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<v Speaker 2>how the blackjack table was rigged against him and his friends,

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<v Speaker 2>who happened to literally be literally the Sopranos. That was

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<v Speaker 2>just scared the ship. I was so scary. And I

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<v Speaker 2>see that he's yelling at the concierge, and I think

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<v Speaker 2>I'm worried that he's lost his friend who I had

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<v Speaker 2>taken to go see George Love You're you're the friend

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<v Speaker 2>is mysterious. The friend is real nice, He's just an

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<v Speaker 2>actor guy that we know. But yeah, but.

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<v Speaker 1>You're keeping him out of it for a reason. Well

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<v Speaker 1>is he in the witness protection.

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<v Speaker 2>All right? But so so I lean in. I'm like, oh,

0:11:09.080 --> 0:11:10.920
<v Speaker 2>the guy's name is Lenny, And I'm like, hey, yup,

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<v Speaker 2>So I lean into it. I'm going to back off

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<v Speaker 2>the mic, yeah, because what happened to the next was

0:11:16.080 --> 0:11:19.920
<v Speaker 2>so scary. So I lean into Gandolphin. He was screaming

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<v Speaker 2>at the guy at the desk, and I say, excuse me,

0:11:22.840 --> 0:11:25.640
<v Speaker 2>mister GANDELFHENI uh if Lenny went to go find you

0:11:25.720 --> 0:11:32.400
<v Speaker 2>with the nightclub called Pure James. Gandolfini turns to me

0:11:32.440 --> 0:11:33.080
<v Speaker 2>and says.

0:11:33.640 --> 0:11:34.600
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I don't know that.

0:11:37.360 --> 0:11:42.000
<v Speaker 2>And that was scary my heart. Yeah, like broke. I

0:11:42.040 --> 0:11:44.600
<v Speaker 2>just got yelled at by my favorite TV character. He

0:11:44.760 --> 0:11:45.600
<v Speaker 2>was so mad at me.

0:11:46.200 --> 0:11:48.200
<v Speaker 1>Well, you know, you can look at it that way,

0:11:48.960 --> 0:11:50.760
<v Speaker 1>but you could also look at it the way as like,

0:11:50.800 --> 0:11:52.880
<v Speaker 1>because he yelled at Carmela and he loved her.

0:11:53.360 --> 0:11:57.080
<v Speaker 2>He loved Carmela and and so I think it's okay,

0:11:57.160 --> 0:11:59.839
<v Speaker 2>and then but then he so I started, I like,

0:11:59.920 --> 0:12:01.640
<v Speaker 2>my lips started quivering, and I thought I was going

0:12:01.679 --> 0:12:04.520
<v Speaker 2>to cry. And I grabbed Jenny's hand and I ran

0:12:04.559 --> 0:12:06.880
<v Speaker 2>round the corner. I'm like, James Kendolphini just yelled at me,

0:12:07.880 --> 0:12:11.840
<v Speaker 2>and then he came around the corner a few minutes later.

0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:15.200
<v Speaker 2>Jenny's like, he's right behind you, and I'm like, oh

0:12:15.280 --> 0:12:17.760
<v Speaker 2>my god, he's gonna yell at me more again. Yeah,

0:12:17.760 --> 0:12:19.440
<v Speaker 2>he's gonna really yell at you this time. And he

0:12:19.480 --> 0:12:21.760
<v Speaker 2>tapped me on the shoulder and he said, yeah, you

0:12:22.200 --> 0:12:25.760
<v Speaker 2>do a show, Yeah, you have a show. I said, yeah, yeah,

0:12:25.760 --> 0:12:27.760
<v Speaker 2>I do a show called Reena and II one. He said, oh, yeah,

0:12:27.760 --> 0:12:30.520
<v Speaker 2>it's great, it's a great it's a great show, really good,

0:12:30.960 --> 0:12:33.120
<v Speaker 2>and then he walked away. And so then I went

0:12:33.160 --> 0:12:36.320
<v Speaker 2>back to the concierge and I'm like, what what happened?

0:12:36.920 --> 0:12:39.320
<v Speaker 2>He was screaming at you, and then he screamed at

0:12:39.360 --> 0:12:41.559
<v Speaker 2>me and he said, oh, he said that the blackjack

0:12:41.600 --> 0:12:43.760
<v Speaker 2>tables were rigged and he was super super mad and

0:12:43.800 --> 0:12:46.000
<v Speaker 2>he was screaming at me. And then he said and

0:12:46.000 --> 0:12:49.080
<v Speaker 2>then you came up to him. And I actually didn't

0:12:49.120 --> 0:12:51.400
<v Speaker 2>know who that was. I haven't seen the Sopranos. But

0:12:51.880 --> 0:12:55.040
<v Speaker 2>when you after you left, I said, the concier said that.

0:12:55.160 --> 0:12:57.920
<v Speaker 2>He said to Kendel Foinie, oh you're friends with Lieutenant Dangle,

0:12:59.120 --> 0:13:04.040
<v Speaker 2>said you were, Oh that's so funny, and Kendelpinia apparently said,

0:13:04.120 --> 0:13:06.120
<v Speaker 2>having just yelled at me, he said to the concierge, Yeah,

0:13:06.120 --> 0:13:09.520
<v Speaker 2>he's just great. He's a great guy, great guy. So

0:13:09.559 --> 0:13:13.200
<v Speaker 2>it was the scariest night anyway, meeting your Well, yeah,

0:13:13.280 --> 0:13:14.199
<v Speaker 2>I had this thing.

0:13:14.360 --> 0:13:16.840
<v Speaker 1>I do have this thing about meeting heroes that like,

0:13:16.920 --> 0:13:19.080
<v Speaker 1>I never I wouldn't allow the.

0:13:19.360 --> 0:13:21.680
<v Speaker 2>Late night bookers to approach David boyd No. I don't

0:13:21.679 --> 0:13:23.080
<v Speaker 2>know if he would ever have done the show.

0:13:23.160 --> 0:13:25.079
<v Speaker 1>Of course he would have, but I would think he

0:13:25.120 --> 0:13:27.360
<v Speaker 1>would like, you're not allowed to even get in touch

0:13:27.400 --> 0:13:31.920
<v Speaker 1>with him because if he turns up and there's nothing

0:13:31.960 --> 0:13:32.480
<v Speaker 1>you can do.

0:13:32.720 --> 0:13:34.280
<v Speaker 2>What if it goes badly? Right now?

0:13:34.360 --> 0:13:35.880
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, And the reason why I want to because I

0:13:35.920 --> 0:13:39.400
<v Speaker 1>had heard through the great he likes you. Though I

0:13:39.520 --> 0:13:41.400
<v Speaker 1>know you were laughing at the show, I had done

0:13:41.440 --> 0:13:44.160
<v Speaker 1>a sketch yeah no, no, yeah, he does on his

0:13:44.240 --> 0:13:47.079
<v Speaker 1>sixtieth birthday, which is seriously how long ago it was,

0:13:47.080 --> 0:13:49.840
<v Speaker 1>because I'm sixty one now, But on his sixtieth birthday,

0:13:50.480 --> 0:13:52.560
<v Speaker 1>I did a sketch in the show where like I

0:13:52.679 --> 0:13:56.760
<v Speaker 1>sang as David Boy because I can do David Boy going,

0:13:57.240 --> 0:14:01.200
<v Speaker 1>I'm going down the shops to get some bin that's

0:14:01.240 --> 0:14:04.839
<v Speaker 1>it and some that's it.

0:14:05.040 --> 0:14:05.880
<v Speaker 2>You know, that kind of thing.

0:14:05.920 --> 0:14:09.480
<v Speaker 1>And it was just like old guy stuff gets off

0:14:09.960 --> 0:14:15.200
<v Speaker 1>my and he apparently thought it was very funny. And

0:14:15.240 --> 0:14:18.560
<v Speaker 1>then I thought, but if he comes on, I don't

0:14:18.559 --> 0:14:20.880
<v Speaker 1>know I would I wouldn't be like that, No, I'd

0:14:20.920 --> 0:14:23.080
<v Speaker 1>be I was still I still believed in the myth

0:14:23.160 --> 0:14:23.760
<v Speaker 1>at that point.

0:14:23.960 --> 0:14:26.960
<v Speaker 2>It's a bell you can't unring. Well that that that's right,

0:14:27.400 --> 0:14:29.160
<v Speaker 2>that is it's a bell you can't unring.

0:14:30.360 --> 0:14:31.840
<v Speaker 1>Like Morris is a big one for you. You ever

0:14:31.880 --> 0:14:32.440
<v Speaker 1>meet Mars.

0:14:32.440 --> 0:14:33.440
<v Speaker 2>Him a couple of times.

0:14:33.480 --> 0:14:35.400
<v Speaker 1>Disappointing, Okay, disappointing.

0:14:35.600 --> 0:14:41.520
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, no, it's it's very sort of very imagine Chili's

0:14:41.600 --> 0:14:46.080
<v Speaker 3>chili thinking about it's just so chilly dells and stuff.

0:14:46.560 --> 0:14:49.000
<v Speaker 2>If only we could all think about that. Of course,

0:14:49.040 --> 0:14:52.880
<v Speaker 2>if we want washed in blood, you know, it's just

0:14:52.880 --> 0:14:56.640
<v Speaker 2>always a thing. So I had I had speaking of

0:14:56.720 --> 0:15:01.160
<v Speaker 2>your your bowie thing. I went to see the Springsteen's

0:15:01.160 --> 0:15:04.840
<v Speaker 2>Broadway show, oh yeah, and uh and it was amazing,

0:15:04.920 --> 0:15:07.680
<v Speaker 2>you know, and it was like Springsteen and you're sitting

0:15:07.720 --> 0:15:08.760
<v Speaker 2>right there, you know.

0:15:09.440 --> 0:15:12.280
<v Speaker 1>And if I heard he had a peptic ulcer, I

0:15:12.320 --> 0:15:14.680
<v Speaker 1>was like, of course, of course that would explain it.

0:15:16.840 --> 0:15:20.960
<v Speaker 1>I've had that kind of ulcerated selfigus thing. It's oh

0:15:21.040 --> 0:15:22.160
<v Speaker 1>it has to be. I don't know how he could

0:15:22.160 --> 0:15:23.840
<v Speaker 1>sing for this long. Yeah, no, it's amazing.

0:15:24.360 --> 0:15:27.600
<v Speaker 2>So I'm walking out of the theater to see Springsteen

0:15:28.320 --> 0:15:31.120
<v Speaker 2>and one of his security guys there's like guy kind

0:15:31.120 --> 0:15:33.960
<v Speaker 2>of wrangles the stage door area, keeps people just a

0:15:34.000 --> 0:15:36.640
<v Speaker 2>little bit away and stuff. And then there's another guy

0:15:36.840 --> 0:15:38.440
<v Speaker 2>like at the door, but there's another guy who's just

0:15:38.520 --> 0:15:41.880
<v Speaker 2>kind of like street guy, keeping it safe for the loss,

0:15:42.160 --> 0:15:45.520
<v Speaker 2>give it real. And he goes, oh, hey, man, are

0:15:45.520 --> 0:15:47.320
<v Speaker 2>you are you going to see the boss backstage?

0:15:48.200 --> 0:15:53.880
<v Speaker 1>Because I guess he knows me. And I was like, no, no,

0:15:53.920 --> 0:15:56.200
<v Speaker 1>I wasn't going to.

0:15:57.200 --> 0:15:59.520
<v Speaker 2>Now I have to well, and the security guy's like,

0:15:59.600 --> 0:16:01.920
<v Speaker 2>go ahead, man, no, no, no, go go go on go

0:16:01.960 --> 0:16:04.320
<v Speaker 2>on back. Just say, Ronnie, just go ahead, go go

0:16:04.400 --> 0:16:08.200
<v Speaker 2>on back and meet the boss. And I'm standing there.

0:16:09.480 --> 0:16:11.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm standing in the street and I'm looking at this

0:16:11.200 --> 0:16:13.800
<v Speaker 2>guy and there's another security guy right, and there's probably

0:16:13.840 --> 0:16:14.680
<v Speaker 2>another guy after that.

0:16:14.720 --> 0:16:20.880
<v Speaker 1>Sure yeah, and then Bell and Jack Nicholson, and I'm.

0:16:20.720 --> 0:16:23.880
<v Speaker 2>Like, my next thought is okay, so let's say I

0:16:23.920 --> 0:16:28.040
<v Speaker 2>get past next Thanks security guy. Great, so I've made

0:16:28.040 --> 0:16:30.680
<v Speaker 2>it past two security guys who love me. Then I

0:16:30.720 --> 0:16:33.480
<v Speaker 2>get let's say I get to the boss. Yeah, and

0:16:33.520 --> 0:16:36.040
<v Speaker 2>his eyes don't light up. Yeah, he doesn't know who

0:16:36.040 --> 0:16:40.200
<v Speaker 2>you are maybe at all? Right, and that's lightly. I

0:16:40.240 --> 0:16:41.160
<v Speaker 2>mean you don't know.

0:16:41.360 --> 0:16:43.160
<v Speaker 1>I mean you've done a lot of stuff in nine

0:16:43.200 --> 0:16:45.000
<v Speaker 1>one one is like everybody loves that show.

0:16:45.080 --> 0:16:49.280
<v Speaker 2>You would think, but like, what if the boss didn't

0:16:49.360 --> 0:16:52.240
<v Speaker 2>care and didn't know and didn't care? Yeah, I think

0:16:52.240 --> 0:16:54.600
<v Speaker 2>you're overthinking it. Did you did you go? Did you

0:16:54.600 --> 0:16:56.880
<v Speaker 2>get through? I didn't go through because I was so scared.

0:16:56.920 --> 0:16:59.760
<v Speaker 2>I was like, if on the off chance that he

0:16:59.760 --> 0:17:01.760
<v Speaker 2>does and go like, what if I get through and

0:17:01.760 --> 0:17:02.360
<v Speaker 2>he goes.

0:17:02.320 --> 0:17:04.480
<v Speaker 1>Ronnie, you're you're fucking me?

0:17:05.119 --> 0:17:05.359
<v Speaker 2>What?

0:17:05.640 --> 0:17:09.400
<v Speaker 5>How are these randos? We got randos getting back here?

0:17:10.000 --> 0:17:12.359
<v Speaker 2>What are we doing? Ronnie? But he wouldn't say that

0:17:12.400 --> 0:17:15.080
<v Speaker 2>in front of you? Then what if he did? He

0:17:16.320 --> 0:17:19.639
<v Speaker 2>wouldn't he's boss, Ronnie, you're fucking me.

0:17:21.680 --> 0:17:24.080
<v Speaker 5>This is just back here, and he's got his fingers

0:17:24.119 --> 0:17:27.320
<v Speaker 5>in the seven layer dip and then of a bitch,

0:17:27.640 --> 0:17:29.760
<v Speaker 5>Ronnie get the get out.

0:17:30.080 --> 0:17:32.439
<v Speaker 1>No, but then and then Ronnie loses his job. In

0:17:32.480 --> 0:17:34.080
<v Speaker 1>this scenario, it's horrible.

0:17:34.160 --> 0:17:35.959
<v Speaker 2>This is a terrible and then I take Ronnie has

0:17:36.000 --> 0:17:38.280
<v Speaker 2>to live with me for a while eleven year house.

0:17:38.480 --> 0:17:39.800
<v Speaker 2>He's like, man, I really thought.

0:17:39.640 --> 0:17:42.600
<v Speaker 1>The Boss Tom and the Roadie is recorded in front

0:17:42.640 --> 0:17:44.240
<v Speaker 1>of a live studio audience.

0:17:44.480 --> 0:17:47.480
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, anyway, I sent I sent him back to see

0:17:47.520 --> 0:17:50.560
<v Speaker 2>the Boss, and the Boss was just mat I Boss

0:17:50.640 --> 0:17:53.360
<v Speaker 2>probably pretends to know you. Well, that's so. I mean,

0:17:53.520 --> 0:17:55.639
<v Speaker 2>haven't you done that when you've been introduced to one

0:17:55.760 --> 0:17:56.240
<v Speaker 2>day long?

0:17:56.480 --> 0:17:59.640
<v Speaker 1>Because I did this once once where I get introduced

0:17:59.640 --> 0:18:04.399
<v Speaker 1>the Costello backstage and I was like, and he said, hello, Craig,

0:18:04.520 --> 0:18:06.800
<v Speaker 1>nice to meet you. And I was like, knows you,

0:18:07.000 --> 0:18:08.640
<v Speaker 1>he knows my name. And then I saw a guy

0:18:08.800 --> 0:18:09.879
<v Speaker 1>literally a household name though.

0:18:09.960 --> 0:18:14.720
<v Speaker 2>You know, there was a guy who it's a Craig Ferguson.

0:18:15.760 --> 0:18:17.440
<v Speaker 2>He got a handle, he's got handles. Get a guy

0:18:17.440 --> 0:18:18.640
<v Speaker 2>that goes it's Craig fergus.

0:18:18.800 --> 0:18:20.560
<v Speaker 1>Now, the problem is it doesn't work when it's not

0:18:20.640 --> 0:18:22.400
<v Speaker 1>Craig Ferguson, because the guy only.

0:18:22.200 --> 0:18:26.560
<v Speaker 2>Says the guy whisky works for you, exactly, Craig fergus,

0:18:26.800 --> 0:18:28.400
<v Speaker 2>Craig figus. It's a guy.

0:18:28.840 --> 0:18:32.240
<v Speaker 1>There's a guy Coronie that used to work for Chris

0:18:32.680 --> 0:18:34.400
<v Speaker 1>fucked up till he fucked up and.

0:18:34.359 --> 0:18:36.960
<v Speaker 2>He was letting Randos in. Rando's were back.

0:18:40.280 --> 0:18:43.880
<v Speaker 1>The Craig Ferguson Fancy Rascals Stand Up Tour continues throughout

0:18:43.880 --> 0:18:47.840
<v Speaker 1>the United States in twenty twenty four. For a full

0:18:47.880 --> 0:18:50.400
<v Speaker 1>list of dates and tickets, go to the Craig Ferguson

0:18:50.440 --> 0:18:52.200
<v Speaker 1>show dot com Slash Tour.

0:18:52.800 --> 0:18:53.520
<v Speaker 2>So you are there.

0:18:58.520 --> 0:19:01.639
<v Speaker 1>You're on the road right now, right working with the State,

0:19:02.560 --> 0:19:04.680
<v Speaker 1>which is kind of a rock band situation to be in.

0:19:04.680 --> 0:19:07.880
<v Speaker 2>And that's that's a cult outfit, very very very much

0:19:07.920 --> 0:19:11.360
<v Speaker 2>so in that Remember how the Clash never made any money. Yeah,

0:19:12.720 --> 0:19:14.760
<v Speaker 2>they had to live in like squad apartments and stuff.

0:19:16.760 --> 0:19:19.840
<v Speaker 2>Clash that was a lot to do with miss management, drugs.

0:19:19.960 --> 0:19:20.880
<v Speaker 2>Is that? Is that what you're sure?

0:19:20.880 --> 0:19:21.080
<v Speaker 1>Sure?

0:19:21.200 --> 0:19:23.840
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, we're too old for both of those. Well yeah yeah,

0:19:23.960 --> 0:19:26.000
<v Speaker 2>but no, it is a lot like being in a band.

0:19:26.359 --> 0:19:28.159
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I mean, you get a band back together, do

0:19:28.200 --> 0:19:30.119
<v Speaker 1>you guys have like backstage antics?

0:19:30.160 --> 0:19:33.680
<v Speaker 2>And like do we have antics too? We fight a

0:19:33.880 --> 0:19:36.359
<v Speaker 2>we fight a lot. We're still fighting. Absolutely. It's a

0:19:36.440 --> 0:19:40.840
<v Speaker 2>good lord. But it's always about the work, you know.

0:19:40.920 --> 0:19:43.920
<v Speaker 2>It's like never we never have personal stuff. We're all

0:19:44.040 --> 0:19:47.560
<v Speaker 2>you know, we the State the Comedy Group got together

0:19:48.520 --> 0:19:51.600
<v Speaker 2>in nineteen nineties eighty eight Shut the Front Door. So

0:19:51.640 --> 0:19:54.280
<v Speaker 2>we've been together since I was eighteen years old and

0:19:54.320 --> 0:19:57.800
<v Speaker 2>now I'm fifty three, so it's still God'm sixty one. Man,

0:19:57.920 --> 0:20:01.560
<v Speaker 2>it's fucking it's fucking bad. Yeah, when do we guess

0:20:01.640 --> 0:20:03.960
<v Speaker 2>we get to quit at some point? Yeah? I tried

0:20:04.000 --> 0:20:05.679
<v Speaker 2>it the way you did not try I know, and

0:20:05.680 --> 0:20:07.159
<v Speaker 2>then I noticed that. And then the next thing I

0:20:07.240 --> 0:20:13.199
<v Speaker 2>noticed is dates everywhere, and you got two podcasts and

0:20:13.240 --> 0:20:19.800
<v Speaker 2>you're on tour everywhere. Quitting my fuck, No, for sure,

0:20:19.800 --> 0:20:21.879
<v Speaker 2>of course, you know. So by the way, everyone said

0:20:21.880 --> 0:20:23.440
<v Speaker 2>that about you. As soon as you were like I'm

0:20:23.440 --> 0:20:25.920
<v Speaker 2>not to chill out for a minute, I'm like, Craig is, yeah,

0:20:25.960 --> 0:20:28.840
<v Speaker 2>I know, Chris got a chill out for seem like

0:20:29.040 --> 0:20:31.400
<v Speaker 2>the guy who improvises a twenty minute monologue.

0:20:31.440 --> 0:20:36.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it was when you do that at home, Like

0:20:37.359 --> 0:20:40.920
<v Speaker 1>Megan's like, I think maybe you should go do this.

0:20:41.480 --> 0:20:43.320
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, hey, hey, you know what, Megan, you know

0:20:43.359 --> 0:20:45.040
<v Speaker 2>what happened. But I came in through the kitchen door.

0:20:45.080 --> 0:20:46.479
<v Speaker 2>I came in through the kitchen door. Let me tell

0:20:46.480 --> 0:20:46.840
<v Speaker 2>you about the.

0:20:46.840 --> 0:20:48.199
<v Speaker 1>Kitchen door and She's like, you could be doing this

0:20:48.200 --> 0:20:52.280
<v Speaker 1>in Vancouver, Vancouver needs you yourself.

0:20:53.160 --> 0:20:57.119
<v Speaker 2>County, Yeah, Merrillville. It's I'm playing all those places. Of

0:20:57.119 --> 0:20:59.600
<v Speaker 2>course you are. I see you get in the state.

0:20:59.640 --> 0:21:01.560
<v Speaker 2>You're right in the same gigs, right we uh yeah.

0:21:01.560 --> 0:21:04.120
<v Speaker 2>We've actually only tested the show out so far once

0:21:04.160 --> 0:21:06.440
<v Speaker 2>and then we've got a bunch a lot of dates

0:21:06.440 --> 0:21:10.000
<v Speaker 2>coming up and after November. So yeah, you excited about that?

0:21:10.040 --> 0:21:14.000
<v Speaker 2>I am. You know it. There is nothing like No,

0:21:14.200 --> 0:21:15.560
<v Speaker 2>it's nothing. It's great.

0:21:15.880 --> 0:21:19.879
<v Speaker 1>It's really fun, and it's it's not replaceable with a

0:21:20.080 --> 0:21:22.640
<v Speaker 1>I no no, yeah, a little Abba.

0:21:22.400 --> 0:21:26.920
<v Speaker 2>Are doing a show which is holograms. There are a

0:21:27.000 --> 0:21:30.640
<v Speaker 2>K pop out. I think that the or the Japanese

0:21:30.760 --> 0:21:34.960
<v Speaker 2>I love singer who say I don't want to see

0:21:35.000 --> 0:21:36.240
<v Speaker 2>an alba Ai show?

0:21:36.280 --> 0:21:37.679
<v Speaker 1>Oh you know you do want to see it, and

0:21:37.680 --> 0:21:39.240
<v Speaker 1>you want to see it with me, and you want

0:21:39.240 --> 0:21:41.320
<v Speaker 1>to bring Jenny and okay, and I'll take Meghan and

0:21:42.080 --> 0:21:45.200
<v Speaker 1>I have a written at the two Arena. I'm serious.

0:21:45.440 --> 0:21:49.800
<v Speaker 1>It's hologram. I'm from the nineteen eight I'm yeah. But

0:21:49.840 --> 0:21:52.880
<v Speaker 1>it's with their permission. Oh yeah, they're they're making money

0:21:52.920 --> 0:21:54.960
<v Speaker 1>from it. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean it's their

0:21:55.000 --> 0:21:58.000
<v Speaker 1>songs and they're you know, and it's them young.

0:21:58.440 --> 0:22:00.240
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, see this is a problem. This is where comes

0:22:00.240 --> 0:22:02.159
<v Speaker 2>a little bit of a black mirror episode for me.

0:22:02.760 --> 0:22:06.960
<v Speaker 2>The brunette sort of redhead from Abba. Yeah, let's see

0:22:06.960 --> 0:22:11.800
<v Speaker 2>it's Benny Bjorn and yeah, yeah, I think it's a.

0:22:12.480 --> 0:22:15.720
<v Speaker 2>I think it's a I might carry a crush for

0:22:15.800 --> 0:22:18.760
<v Speaker 2>her that has not died. I hear. Yeah, I'm kind

0:22:18.760 --> 0:22:23.560
<v Speaker 2>of the same. That's a tough it's it like I'm worried.

0:22:23.640 --> 0:22:25.120
<v Speaker 2>That's the same way I'm worried about. Like, I don't

0:22:25.119 --> 0:22:26.840
<v Speaker 2>know if my family is gonna let me just buy

0:22:26.840 --> 0:22:31.840
<v Speaker 2>tickets to the Taylor Swift movie because it seems dubious. Well,

0:22:32.840 --> 0:22:35.080
<v Speaker 2>his dad so excited to go see the Taylor Swift.

0:22:35.160 --> 0:22:36.879
<v Speaker 1>Are you excited to see the Taylor Swift noting?

0:22:36.920 --> 0:22:39.800
<v Speaker 2>Damn it? I am. Yeah, see, I know unless I

0:22:39.800 --> 0:22:40.240
<v Speaker 2>get nothing.

0:22:40.280 --> 0:22:43.159
<v Speaker 1>But I hear nothing but nice things that Jack Taylor Swift,

0:22:43.200 --> 0:22:46.000
<v Speaker 1>and certainly the music that I've heard is fabulous and

0:22:46.520 --> 0:22:48.760
<v Speaker 1>uh balpy and catchy and all the things.

0:22:49.000 --> 0:22:50.960
<v Speaker 2>He's not for me, but no, no, everything is for

0:22:51.400 --> 0:22:53.520
<v Speaker 2>you know. I mean, it's it's but and.

0:22:53.560 --> 0:22:56.239
<v Speaker 1>Also she doesn't give six like guy, I like her

0:22:56.240 --> 0:22:57.000
<v Speaker 1>making music for me.

0:22:57.200 --> 0:22:59.400
<v Speaker 2>I like her. I like her guitar playing actually a lot,

0:22:59.440 --> 0:23:04.399
<v Speaker 2>and she and I own an identical guitar. Because Taylor Swift.

0:23:04.480 --> 0:23:06.800
<v Speaker 1>Trying to make you and Taylor Swift kind of be

0:23:06.800 --> 0:23:10.760
<v Speaker 1>so mazed because you want the same. You're right, your

0:23:10.760 --> 0:23:13.120
<v Speaker 1>family shouldn't let you go. No, No, it's weird. Why

0:23:13.200 --> 0:23:14.840
<v Speaker 1>his dad want to go see the Taylor Swift movie

0:23:14.960 --> 0:23:16.800
<v Speaker 1>is just weird. Well, you're you're allowed to like what

0:23:16.920 --> 0:23:18.359
<v Speaker 1>you like. I mean, you don't like to go and

0:23:18.359 --> 0:23:20.520
<v Speaker 1>see the movie. Well, this is what you don't get

0:23:20.640 --> 0:23:21.600
<v Speaker 1>even weird about it.

0:23:21.680 --> 0:23:23.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, well, I actually think i'd be finding the Taylor

0:23:23.600 --> 0:23:28.280
<v Speaker 2>Swift movie. Yea, I do. I worry. You know, part

0:23:28.320 --> 0:23:31.679
<v Speaker 2>of my happy adult life is that the idea of

0:23:31.760 --> 0:23:35.359
<v Speaker 2>the young ladies from from But don't exist anymore. So

0:23:35.440 --> 0:23:39.680
<v Speaker 2>now these monsters with their no but they're holograms. No

0:23:39.800 --> 0:23:42.120
<v Speaker 2>they they they look really real. No, I don't think

0:23:42.119 --> 0:23:44.240
<v Speaker 2>this is good for me to go see. Oh, because

0:23:44.280 --> 0:23:49.600
<v Speaker 2>you've aged, I've aged, and somehow young Agoneatha from Abba.

0:23:50.280 --> 0:23:52.040
<v Speaker 2>But it's a good black mirror. It's a black mirror.

0:23:53.720 --> 0:23:57.920
<v Speaker 1>It isn't interesting stuff I have I have. I thought

0:23:57.920 --> 0:24:00.680
<v Speaker 1>it was just you know I was in my age

0:24:00.680 --> 0:24:02.479
<v Speaker 1>because I actually am aging.

0:24:02.640 --> 0:24:04.400
<v Speaker 2>And then I think, no, it's not that it's.

0:24:04.200 --> 0:24:06.800
<v Speaker 1>Because of robots, it's because of the it's because of

0:24:06.800 --> 0:24:12.560
<v Speaker 1>ai is. Other people are not aging, they're not And filters, Oh, yeah,

0:24:12.600 --> 0:24:13.640
<v Speaker 1>of course that'll fair.

0:24:13.680 --> 0:24:17.640
<v Speaker 2>Filters. You're on the social medias, aren't you. I am,

0:24:17.680 --> 0:24:20.399
<v Speaker 2>but I would yeah, I'd love not to be. Yeah.

0:24:20.480 --> 0:24:22.600
<v Speaker 2>I think everybody talks the same about it. It's funny.

0:24:22.600 --> 0:24:24.880
<v Speaker 1>It's like living in La. Like when you leave La

0:24:25.160 --> 0:24:27.920
<v Speaker 1>and everyone around it, did you leave La? And you're like, yeah,

0:24:28.520 --> 0:24:29.360
<v Speaker 1>I'd love to do that.

0:24:30.119 --> 0:24:33.600
<v Speaker 2>Leave, but yeah, it's hard. You can't. It's hard you

0:24:33.640 --> 0:24:35.400
<v Speaker 2>and I have And then we're both sitting here.

0:24:35.560 --> 0:24:37.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and I'm both sitting in a studio in La,

0:24:38.520 --> 0:24:42.520
<v Speaker 1>in the middle of La. You know what I think

0:24:42.560 --> 0:24:44.680
<v Speaker 1>it was some British film director said about La. I

0:24:44.720 --> 0:24:47.240
<v Speaker 1>think it's a It's the absolutely accurate description of it.

0:24:47.280 --> 0:24:49.879
<v Speaker 1>It said, La is a town where you turn up,

0:24:49.880 --> 0:24:51.479
<v Speaker 1>you get off the plane, you go to the hotel,

0:24:51.600 --> 0:24:53.600
<v Speaker 1>you put it on your suitcase, you go out, you

0:24:53.640 --> 0:24:55.000
<v Speaker 1>lie out by the pool, you have an app.

0:24:55.000 --> 0:24:57.240
<v Speaker 2>You wake up later. It's twenty years.

0:24:59.359 --> 0:25:02.080
<v Speaker 1>It's it feels a little bit because I was here

0:25:02.080 --> 0:25:03.320
<v Speaker 1>twenty three years, like eleven here.

0:25:03.359 --> 0:25:04.879
<v Speaker 2>I come here to work, and I come here to

0:25:04.920 --> 0:25:06.120
<v Speaker 2>see friends.

0:25:05.880 --> 0:25:08.720
<v Speaker 1>And I come here to to do business, but I

0:25:09.000 --> 0:25:10.160
<v Speaker 1>don't live here anymore.

0:25:10.359 --> 0:25:13.080
<v Speaker 2>I was sort of thought that Los Angeles felt a

0:25:13.160 --> 0:25:16.520
<v Speaker 2>little bit like the way people describe like working on

0:25:16.600 --> 0:25:19.160
<v Speaker 2>an oil rig. You know, you go out and work

0:25:19.200 --> 0:25:22.480
<v Speaker 2>on the oil rig. You don't stay there for the

0:25:22.480 --> 0:25:26.439
<v Speaker 2>theater scene and for like the social times. You go

0:25:26.480 --> 0:25:29.520
<v Speaker 2>get the fucking oil, the oil out and get the

0:25:29.520 --> 0:25:32.760
<v Speaker 2>fuck and then goes somewhere lovely. Yeah.

0:25:32.800 --> 0:25:35.399
<v Speaker 1>But the thing is that the trick with California is

0:25:35.440 --> 0:25:36.880
<v Speaker 1>that plenty of it is.

0:25:36.840 --> 0:25:41.320
<v Speaker 2>Lovely, so lovely, yeah, so close to Yeah, I don't know.

0:25:41.400 --> 0:25:44.119
<v Speaker 1>I kind of like we left and now I don't know.

0:25:44.280 --> 0:25:45.879
<v Speaker 1>We're in New York a lot of the time, and

0:25:45.880 --> 0:25:48.480
<v Speaker 1>it's like, I love see New York is a good

0:25:48.480 --> 0:25:49.399
<v Speaker 1>city to get older.

0:25:49.440 --> 0:25:52.200
<v Speaker 2>And it's great. That's actually my backup plan.

0:25:52.400 --> 0:25:55.360
<v Speaker 1>It's I'm telling you it's great because you just walk

0:25:55.359 --> 0:25:59.560
<v Speaker 1>outside your show every day. And also you walk around

0:26:00.000 --> 0:26:03.000
<v Speaker 1>everybody's not like like everybody in La that Garrison Quila thing.

0:26:03.040 --> 0:26:05.119
<v Speaker 1>Everyone's in the mid thirties. Even the children are in

0:26:05.119 --> 0:26:08.080
<v Speaker 1>their mid very good point. But in New York, people

0:26:08.240 --> 0:26:11.760
<v Speaker 1>like it's just a smortgage boarder. Just everybody like people

0:26:11.840 --> 0:26:14.320
<v Speaker 1>with one bag, guy, one small eye, big hand, a

0:26:14.320 --> 0:26:16.320
<v Speaker 1>little hand, you know, one hundred years old, you know,

0:26:16.440 --> 0:26:19.440
<v Speaker 1>fifteen years old, and people are shuffling around really rich people,

0:26:19.520 --> 0:26:22.359
<v Speaker 1>really poor people, people without hats.

0:26:22.359 --> 0:26:25.320
<v Speaker 2>I never thought I really leave New York. New York

0:26:25.400 --> 0:26:27.400
<v Speaker 2>was weird when I got to New York. Oh well,

0:26:27.640 --> 0:26:29.960
<v Speaker 2>I mean you worked at Save the Robots. I did, Yeah,

0:26:30.160 --> 0:26:32.960
<v Speaker 2>put you ever there? I probably was there. Yeah, I

0:26:33.119 --> 0:26:36.520
<v Speaker 2>probably worked there. Yeah, I've read that I worked there.

0:26:38.520 --> 0:26:40.359
<v Speaker 2>So we got I got to New York in nineteen

0:26:40.440 --> 0:26:43.160
<v Speaker 2>eighty eight. Yeah you would have been there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:26:43.200 --> 0:26:45.399
<v Speaker 2>I stopped working there. But we didn't have any money

0:26:45.440 --> 0:26:47.240
<v Speaker 2>or anything. We were really poor. Yeah, but it was

0:26:47.359 --> 0:26:49.120
<v Speaker 2>the after hours club. I didn't know it, but until

0:26:49.119 --> 0:26:52.400
<v Speaker 2>two eight that was Can you imagine because two guys

0:26:52.400 --> 0:26:54.520
<v Speaker 2>who now have dinner at five, I would love to

0:26:54.520 --> 0:26:56.720
<v Speaker 2>have dinner at five. I'd like to have dinner out

0:26:56.720 --> 0:26:58.720
<v Speaker 2>of the way by five, a.

0:26:58.840 --> 0:27:01.600
<v Speaker 1>Club, And we used to go to places, but the

0:27:01.600 --> 0:27:03.680
<v Speaker 1>afteros club thing that was going on then you could.

0:27:03.720 --> 0:27:06.120
<v Speaker 2>You couldn't have that now. I'm like people were openly

0:27:06.200 --> 0:27:10.560
<v Speaker 2>doing drugs. We went to a place. There was a

0:27:10.600 --> 0:27:12.879
<v Speaker 2>place in the East Village that was an after hours

0:27:12.880 --> 0:27:15.440
<v Speaker 2>place called Brownie's. I can talk about it because there's

0:27:15.440 --> 0:27:17.320
<v Speaker 2>no weight with there. It was not Brownies the music club.

0:27:17.760 --> 0:27:19.520
<v Speaker 2>There was another place where it was owned by this

0:27:19.520 --> 0:27:21.719
<v Speaker 2>guy who had a cowboy hat and he had a revolver.

0:27:22.320 --> 0:27:24.760
<v Speaker 2>Was he English? No, he was an African American gentleman.

0:27:25.359 --> 0:27:28.119
<v Speaker 2>And the only things they sold were like cams of paps,

0:27:28.119 --> 0:27:31.040
<v Speaker 2>blue ribbon and dime bags of cocaine. I think I've

0:27:31.080 --> 0:27:33.560
<v Speaker 2>been there, Yeah, yeah, I think that was it. You

0:27:33.560 --> 0:27:36.640
<v Speaker 2>were not allowed to curse. You could do You could

0:27:36.760 --> 0:27:40.080
<v Speaker 2>literally sit and have paps and do cocaine with a

0:27:40.080 --> 0:27:44.200
<v Speaker 2>guy and a cowboy hat with a pistol. If you cursed,

0:27:44.440 --> 0:27:46.760
<v Speaker 2>which our friend of mine did at the pool table,

0:27:46.880 --> 0:27:49.440
<v Speaker 2>it was a real issue for the owner and he

0:27:49.600 --> 0:27:51.560
<v Speaker 2>was just like, fellas, I'm going to ask you one

0:27:51.560 --> 0:27:55.280
<v Speaker 2>more time with my pistol and my paths. Wow. New

0:27:55.359 --> 0:27:57.320
<v Speaker 2>York was it was? Fuck, It was a thing. There

0:27:57.359 --> 0:28:01.040
<v Speaker 2>was casinos that just were yeah, yeah, I.

0:28:01.320 --> 0:28:04.800
<v Speaker 1>Remember, and I wrote about this, but I was in

0:28:04.840 --> 0:28:07.840
<v Speaker 1>a barcoll Murphy's and the Upper East sized. I don't

0:28:07.840 --> 0:28:10.440
<v Speaker 1>think it's there anymore. But I keep going looking for

0:28:10.520 --> 0:28:12.080
<v Speaker 1>it because I live in the Upper East now, and

0:28:12.119 --> 0:28:12.960
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, is it here?

0:28:13.080 --> 0:28:13.119
<v Speaker 5>No.

0:28:13.800 --> 0:28:15.520
<v Speaker 2>But we went out one.

0:28:15.440 --> 0:28:17.640
<v Speaker 1>Night and then we went over to the West Side

0:28:17.640 --> 0:28:19.520
<v Speaker 1>and it was during the troubles and there was a

0:28:19.520 --> 0:28:22.520
<v Speaker 1>lot of IRA stuff and these guys were there. I

0:28:22.520 --> 0:28:25.159
<v Speaker 1>got a shit kicked out me when we were out

0:28:25.200 --> 0:28:28.480
<v Speaker 1>for one night, and I mean, like, really, I go, like,

0:28:29.119 --> 0:28:31.040
<v Speaker 1>they're kind of beaten up that I'd probably go to

0:28:31.119 --> 0:28:33.920
<v Speaker 1>hospital now. I was hitting the face now you were still. Yeah,

0:28:34.000 --> 0:28:35.399
<v Speaker 1>well if I could, if I could be up now,

0:28:35.440 --> 0:28:35.920
<v Speaker 1>I don't.

0:28:35.720 --> 0:28:36.320
<v Speaker 2>Know if i'd recover.

0:28:36.480 --> 0:28:39.520
<v Speaker 1>God, I go, yeah, I mean like I I turned

0:28:39.520 --> 0:28:42.240
<v Speaker 1>the wrong way, and oh my god, everything hurts all

0:28:42.280 --> 0:28:44.880
<v Speaker 1>the time. New York. I make clicking noises just standing up.

0:28:44.960 --> 0:28:47.960
<v Speaker 2>We got as the state. We got beaten up twice.

0:28:48.160 --> 0:28:50.600
<v Speaker 2>At least. Did you get beaten up many times? For

0:28:50.720 --> 0:28:52.840
<v Speaker 2>the material? I got? No? No, no, just New York

0:28:52.880 --> 0:28:56.000
<v Speaker 2>in the eighties. Oh right, my first, my first getting

0:28:56.000 --> 0:28:58.040
<v Speaker 2>this shit kicked out of me in New York. I

0:28:58.080 --> 0:28:59.960
<v Speaker 2>only be it was eighty fall of nineteen eighty eight.

0:29:00.920 --> 0:29:02.920
<v Speaker 2>I was wearing it like a bright yellow bow tie.

0:29:02.960 --> 0:29:04.880
<v Speaker 2>I just come from you know what, you deserve it.

0:29:04.880 --> 0:29:07.920
<v Speaker 2>I actually deserved it. I was frolicking up Broadway at

0:29:07.960 --> 0:29:12.840
<v Speaker 2>three o'clock in the morning, singing, Pippin' got beaten, oh man.

0:29:12.920 --> 0:29:14.600
<v Speaker 2>But you know, getting beaten on the street in New

0:29:14.680 --> 0:29:16.600
<v Speaker 2>York used used to be a thing, used to be

0:29:16.680 --> 0:29:18.200
<v Speaker 2>a thing. Yeah, and here's a weird thing I'm going

0:29:18.240 --> 0:29:21.720
<v Speaker 2>to say about it that may not be popular. People

0:29:22.160 --> 0:29:26.760
<v Speaker 2>in New York, I think, have better manners and for

0:29:26.800 --> 0:29:30.840
<v Speaker 2>the most part, behave well because there's a solid chance

0:29:30.840 --> 0:29:33.520
<v Speaker 2>you're gonna get clocked. In New York and in LA

0:29:33.600 --> 0:29:35.920
<v Speaker 2>everybody's just bitching and moaning in their cars. You can't

0:29:35.960 --> 0:29:39.760
<v Speaker 2>hear them. Everybody's in a bubble, screaming profanities at you.

0:29:39.880 --> 0:29:42.120
<v Speaker 1>I think this is that's not I don't think that's

0:29:42.960 --> 0:29:44.160
<v Speaker 1>I don't think it's unrealistic.

0:29:44.280 --> 0:29:44.480
<v Speaker 5>Well.

0:29:44.520 --> 0:29:46.440
<v Speaker 1>I had a friend from Texas who used to wear

0:29:46.440 --> 0:29:50.000
<v Speaker 1>a hat and carry a gun, and he used to say.

0:29:49.920 --> 0:29:53.960
<v Speaker 2>In Texas in Los Angeles, yeah, and he used to.

0:29:55.640 --> 0:29:59.520
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, okay, but he would.

0:29:59.240 --> 0:30:05.520
<v Speaker 2>Say, an armed society is a polite society. I get

0:30:05.560 --> 0:30:09.160
<v Speaker 2>weird about that one. Yeah, but you say it. Yeah,

0:30:09.160 --> 0:30:11.800
<v Speaker 2>I'm not saying that. I subscribe to that notion, But

0:30:11.880 --> 0:30:16.320
<v Speaker 2>I do. I do think a society where occasionally say

0:30:16.320 --> 0:30:18.600
<v Speaker 2>their own thing, you gets like somebody gives you like

0:30:18.640 --> 0:30:21.920
<v Speaker 2>a real quick bop to the face. I'm pretty much

0:30:21.920 --> 0:30:25.560
<v Speaker 2>in favor of that. Well, you know, you're you're Irish.

0:30:26.080 --> 0:30:28.280
<v Speaker 1>That said, you know, that's kind of what it is

0:30:28.320 --> 0:30:30.479
<v Speaker 1>to be fair, exactly what it is?

0:30:30.960 --> 0:30:33.440
<v Speaker 2>Iris? What are you like just off the boat? When

0:30:33.440 --> 0:30:35.440
<v Speaker 2>did your people get I got to show you just

0:30:35.480 --> 0:30:37.680
<v Speaker 2>off the boat? Yeah? Did? I didn't show you my

0:30:37.720 --> 0:30:41.400
<v Speaker 2>twenty three and meters. It's ridiculous. Mostly potatoes. It's literally

0:30:41.760 --> 0:30:47.560
<v Speaker 2>it sent me a potato. It turns into yeah, I

0:30:47.560 --> 0:30:50.400
<v Speaker 2>mean because I mean nobody got iris. You know, everybody

0:30:50.440 --> 0:30:52.240
<v Speaker 2>has like a little bit of something else. Yeah, I

0:30:52.280 --> 0:30:55.240
<v Speaker 2>don't all iris. Yeah, I'm all. Well, but what it

0:30:55.280 --> 0:30:57.680
<v Speaker 2>says is it doesn't differentiate, which is crazy, but it's

0:30:57.880 --> 0:31:02.560
<v Speaker 2>it just shows the England, the British Isles and nothing else.

0:31:02.920 --> 0:31:06.080
<v Speaker 1>Right, Well, that's a lot of different influences there. But yeah,

0:31:06.240 --> 0:31:11.480
<v Speaker 1>it's I mean, because as the Irish and the Cats.

0:31:10.040 --> 0:31:12.040
<v Speaker 2>And the you know, and then I don't know what

0:31:12.120 --> 0:31:12.800
<v Speaker 2>the Scotts had made.

0:31:12.960 --> 0:31:15.360
<v Speaker 1>No Italians. I got no Italians. Is that's the important

0:31:15.360 --> 0:31:17.720
<v Speaker 1>part for me? That's the important part. I think I've

0:31:17.720 --> 0:31:20.200
<v Speaker 1>got a lot of Italian obviously. Look I've never done

0:31:20.240 --> 0:31:21.720
<v Speaker 1>it twenty Street me because I don't want your six

0:31:22.760 --> 0:31:25.120
<v Speaker 1>Look at your the gorgeous head of hair you have, crazy,

0:31:25.200 --> 0:31:26.120
<v Speaker 1>I've got to be Italian.

0:31:26.560 --> 0:31:28.680
<v Speaker 2>This is not just the hair of a Scots No,

0:31:28.960 --> 0:31:31.600
<v Speaker 2>it's definitely an Italian. I think that is Well, not

0:31:31.600 --> 0:31:34.280
<v Speaker 2>that movies. The Scott's had great hair, but they're all

0:31:34.360 --> 0:31:37.600
<v Speaker 2>dead in battles too, though, yeah, you know they Well,

0:31:37.680 --> 0:31:40.720
<v Speaker 2>the thing is my family always had good hair.

0:31:41.360 --> 0:31:45.800
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but there was alcohol involved, and I drank a lot.

0:31:45.840 --> 0:31:48.200
<v Speaker 1>About what I'm saying is that you're an alcoholic.

0:31:47.720 --> 0:31:51.560
<v Speaker 2>Your hair will be good. Your hair's fine, right, it's

0:31:51.600 --> 0:31:54.520
<v Speaker 2>doing right. What were we talking about New York and

0:31:54.520 --> 0:31:57.120
<v Speaker 2>the eighties getting beaten up? Yeah, well that's overnight. Yeah.

0:31:57.120 --> 0:31:59.360
<v Speaker 2>The IRA used to be a thing. People loving the IRA,

0:32:00.360 --> 0:32:03.000
<v Speaker 2>people in New York and Chicago just openly loving the IRA.

0:32:03.240 --> 0:32:03.440
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:32:03.440 --> 0:32:05.120
<v Speaker 2>It was a little different where I grew up because

0:32:05.120 --> 0:32:10.760
<v Speaker 2>it was like doorsteps. Yeah. Yeah, and well that was

0:32:10.800 --> 0:32:16.480
<v Speaker 2>a weird, a very icky part about growing up in

0:32:16.600 --> 0:32:21.640
<v Speaker 2>the West Side of Chicago, which we never talked about

0:32:22.600 --> 0:32:25.520
<v Speaker 2>until we all got sort of publicly shamed by Bono.

0:32:26.080 --> 0:32:28.080
<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, yeah, it was very interesting. You would go

0:32:28.080 --> 0:32:31.240
<v Speaker 2>to you'd go to I was at a YouTube concert

0:32:31.360 --> 0:32:35.520
<v Speaker 2>very early, yeah, and the Rosemont Horizon in Chicago, and

0:32:35.560 --> 0:32:39.040
<v Speaker 2>it's you know, all these Irish immigrants, you know, kids

0:32:39.040 --> 0:32:42.960
<v Speaker 2>of the Irish Diasthmir and you know you two's this

0:32:43.080 --> 0:32:47.360
<v Speaker 2>is eighty four eighty six something like that, very really early,

0:32:48.040 --> 0:32:50.080
<v Speaker 2>and Bono would you know, say in the show, like,

0:32:51.800 --> 0:32:53.440
<v Speaker 2>you know, there's a there's a war half none of

0:32:53.440 --> 0:32:59.600
<v Speaker 2>my country, and the Chicago audience would go would all cheer,

0:33:00.320 --> 0:33:02.760
<v Speaker 2>and I was probably part of that, and then he

0:33:02.760 --> 0:33:06.040
<v Speaker 2>would say no, he was, well, he was. He was

0:33:06.120 --> 0:33:07.800
<v Speaker 2>very cool about it. I mean, it'd be like award

0:33:07.800 --> 0:33:11.160
<v Speaker 2>that nobody wants that's killing children and you can't support this,

0:33:11.280 --> 0:33:12.880
<v Speaker 2>and this is some kind and where everybody was like,

0:33:12.920 --> 0:33:14.760
<v Speaker 2>oh shit, and we feel bad. Yeah, and then we

0:33:14.760 --> 0:33:18.480
<v Speaker 2>feel bad. But it took something like it took someone

0:33:18.600 --> 0:33:22.760
<v Speaker 2>like that to make everybody realize what a shitty thing

0:33:22.840 --> 0:33:27.120
<v Speaker 2>that we were, like like publicly just like we're right

0:33:27.200 --> 0:33:31.880
<v Speaker 2>ryeing this crazy thing. Yeah, and yeah, it was a

0:33:32.000 --> 0:33:35.760
<v Speaker 2>lot more. I don't know. I mean it's even now

0:33:35.840 --> 0:33:37.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm sixty one years old.

0:33:37.720 --> 0:33:40.520
<v Speaker 1>Then the you know, the good fight, the agreement has

0:33:40.760 --> 0:33:43.360
<v Speaker 1>happened that, you know, things have changed so much over there,

0:33:43.480 --> 0:33:47.360
<v Speaker 1>and I'm still terrified to talk about it because it's

0:33:47.400 --> 0:33:52.600
<v Speaker 1>fucking dangerous. Yeah, and when you're in a certain company

0:33:52.600 --> 0:33:56.400
<v Speaker 1>in Scotland and Ireland, for sure, it's still fucking dangerous.

0:33:56.560 --> 0:33:58.800
<v Speaker 2>And I don't I can't. I kind of avoided it

0:33:58.880 --> 0:33:59.440
<v Speaker 2>when I was a kid.

0:33:59.480 --> 0:34:02.840
<v Speaker 1>I avoided talking about it at all in the same

0:34:02.920 --> 0:34:05.440
<v Speaker 1>way actually that now when I do stand up, I

0:34:05.440 --> 0:34:06.520
<v Speaker 1>don't do any politics.

0:34:06.600 --> 0:34:09.239
<v Speaker 2>I don't know anything. I actually think that's why the

0:34:09.280 --> 0:34:12.040
<v Speaker 2>state is still popular. Yeah, we never you never. We

0:34:12.120 --> 0:34:16.120
<v Speaker 2>never did like weird impressions of like anybody. We didn't

0:34:16.239 --> 0:34:20.000
<v Speaker 2>give a shit about. Like if we'd done like tons

0:34:20.000 --> 0:34:21.919
<v Speaker 2>of George W. Bull and what would we have done.

0:34:22.360 --> 0:34:25.160
<v Speaker 2>I guess it would have been Bush Senior or so

0:34:25.239 --> 0:34:28.000
<v Speaker 2>I don't know, you like, what would that would not be? Yeah?

0:34:28.120 --> 0:34:30.040
<v Speaker 2>So how long were you guys together? You did? Like

0:34:30.080 --> 0:34:32.480
<v Speaker 2>how many seasons? Like ten seasons? No? No, no, So

0:34:32.520 --> 0:34:35.560
<v Speaker 2>we did well, we got together in eighty eight. We

0:34:35.640 --> 0:34:38.880
<v Speaker 2>were we were just the comedy club at NYU, right,

0:34:39.320 --> 0:34:41.520
<v Speaker 2>and so we were doing like live theater shows and

0:34:41.560 --> 0:34:44.600
<v Speaker 2>things like that, and then we did a show with

0:34:44.719 --> 0:34:50.480
<v Speaker 2>John Stewart for MTV that was fucking awful show. It's

0:34:50.520 --> 0:34:53.000
<v Speaker 2>called You Brought It, You watch it. It was horrible,

0:34:53.360 --> 0:34:55.600
<v Speaker 2>but John Stewart was awesome in it. He got the

0:34:55.680 --> 0:34:58.480
<v Speaker 2>John Stewart Show and we got the State. Right. So

0:34:58.520 --> 0:35:01.560
<v Speaker 2>we did three seasons on MTV. Right.

0:35:01.680 --> 0:35:03.759
<v Speaker 1>We got negative two stars in the New York Post

0:35:04.320 --> 0:35:07.400
<v Speaker 1>the first season negative. That's one of my first of

0:35:07.440 --> 0:35:08.920
<v Speaker 1>you in Late Night in the New York Post they

0:35:08.920 --> 0:35:09.839
<v Speaker 1>said it looked like he.

0:35:09.880 --> 0:35:13.840
<v Speaker 2>Was wearing a wake hate speech.

0:35:13.960 --> 0:35:15.560
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. I was just like, you wouldn't be allowed to

0:35:15.560 --> 0:35:18.319
<v Speaker 1>that now. No, you can't just say they didn't like

0:35:18.320 --> 0:35:20.200
<v Speaker 1>the way I looked, and they just.

0:35:20.200 --> 0:35:22.920
<v Speaker 2>Went after me. Oh my god, I didn't think how

0:35:22.920 --> 0:35:24.799
<v Speaker 2>good you and you were really good at it? I no,

0:35:24.880 --> 0:35:28.080
<v Speaker 2>I have first I feel like I guess maybe I can't.

0:35:28.600 --> 0:35:33.360
<v Speaker 2>At first I think you were though, well, this is

0:35:33.360 --> 0:35:36.680
<v Speaker 2>a great effect. None of us remember stick out together.

0:35:36.680 --> 0:35:41.240
<v Speaker 2>We did three seasons there. We thought we were real badasses. Weirdly,

0:35:41.320 --> 0:35:45.279
<v Speaker 2>we did numbers that were awesome, like the ratings on

0:35:45.360 --> 0:35:49.759
<v Speaker 2>MTV were like, really you can good? Yeah? Uh, And

0:35:49.760 --> 0:35:51.720
<v Speaker 2>then we thought we were hot ship, which is a

0:35:51.719 --> 0:35:52.680
<v Speaker 2>great idea.

0:35:52.920 --> 0:35:56.040
<v Speaker 1>Always a great I think you are, but to be

0:35:56.160 --> 0:35:57.600
<v Speaker 1>it is a good thing to look back on.

0:35:57.719 --> 0:36:00.560
<v Speaker 2>And then we we thought we were hot shit we

0:36:00.640 --> 0:36:03.160
<v Speaker 2>got instead of we had we had an offer to

0:36:03.200 --> 0:36:05.040
<v Speaker 2>do more shows at MTV. We didn't know how many,

0:36:05.880 --> 0:36:09.479
<v Speaker 2>but it was it maybe would have been good. Or

0:36:10.000 --> 0:36:15.319
<v Speaker 2>we had an offer from CBS for two specials and

0:36:15.520 --> 0:36:18.680
<v Speaker 2>if those went well, we would be like a CBS

0:36:19.040 --> 0:36:22.720
<v Speaker 2>like big show. That's print your own money. Though, That's

0:36:22.840 --> 0:36:26.600
<v Speaker 2>what everybody was really excited about. So we shot a

0:36:26.960 --> 0:36:33.799
<v Speaker 2>special for CBS, which got wonderful reviews. Okay, literally, no

0:36:33.800 --> 0:36:36.319
<v Speaker 2>one fucking watched. We all got together to watch it,

0:36:36.800 --> 0:36:39.759
<v Speaker 2>and I remember the most exciting thing that happened is

0:36:39.800 --> 0:36:43.160
<v Speaker 2>there was a thunderstorm warning came on on CBS during

0:36:43.200 --> 0:36:48.880
<v Speaker 2>our special. It was legendarily bad ratings. Alan King was

0:36:48.920 --> 0:36:50.680
<v Speaker 2>on it for some reason, and he was really kind

0:36:50.680 --> 0:36:54.320
<v Speaker 2>of mean to the whole thing sucked.

0:36:54.680 --> 0:36:58.960
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and then I'm sorry here that well, and then

0:36:59.080 --> 0:37:01.919
<v Speaker 1>but then we you know, sort of we keep being

0:37:02.040 --> 0:37:04.080
<v Speaker 1>like we're like, I don't know, We're like Vince Clark

0:37:04.120 --> 0:37:07.920
<v Speaker 1>in depeche Mode, like so State sort of breaks up

0:37:08.480 --> 0:37:10.800
<v Speaker 1>half of us turns into a show called Viva Variety,

0:37:11.360 --> 0:37:12.000
<v Speaker 1>the other house.

0:37:12.040 --> 0:37:14.400
<v Speaker 2>I love to do a show called Stello. Yeah, you know.

0:37:14.480 --> 0:37:18.480
<v Speaker 2>So it's like we we're still on tour. Everybody's been

0:37:18.520 --> 0:37:21.279
<v Speaker 2>on Reno nine one, We've all been in.

0:37:21.280 --> 0:37:24.440
<v Speaker 1>Michael in the frame, Michael and Black Lives and of

0:37:24.440 --> 0:37:26.359
<v Speaker 1>course in the frame for the in the late night show.

0:37:26.400 --> 0:37:31.319
<v Speaker 2>It was me and he wanted that job so badly. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:37:31.440 --> 0:37:33.799
<v Speaker 2>I was on one of his tryout shows. Yeah, he

0:37:33.920 --> 0:37:35.680
<v Speaker 2>was good at it. I saw his tryout show. I

0:37:35.719 --> 0:37:37.680
<v Speaker 2>was like, Okay, he's going to get it. Did you

0:37:37.680 --> 0:37:39.400
<v Speaker 2>think so? Yeah? I did. Yeah, I totally thought he

0:37:39.440 --> 0:37:40.080
<v Speaker 2>was going to get it.

0:37:40.200 --> 0:37:44.880
<v Speaker 1>I remember calling, uh CBS Michael, who was the producer,

0:37:44.880 --> 0:37:48.719
<v Speaker 1>You remember, Michael, this, this is the guy you think.

0:37:49.239 --> 0:37:51.719
<v Speaker 2>I really love. I love I think he would love

0:37:51.760 --> 0:37:52.160
<v Speaker 2>to hear that.

0:37:52.360 --> 0:37:54.239
<v Speaker 1>No. I thought he was I mean, I didn't want

0:37:54.280 --> 0:37:56.560
<v Speaker 1>him to get it for obvious reasons, but I thought

0:37:56.600 --> 0:37:56.960
<v Speaker 1>he was good.

0:37:57.000 --> 0:37:58.719
<v Speaker 2>I did a bit with him when he went on

0:37:58.719 --> 0:38:02.520
<v Speaker 2>one of those shows, and I remember thinking, I, you know, like,

0:38:03.000 --> 0:38:05.040
<v Speaker 2>this is one of my closest best friends in the

0:38:05.160 --> 0:38:07.680
<v Speaker 2>entire world. And I remember thinking, I don't know if

0:38:07.719 --> 0:38:12.040
<v Speaker 2>he's good at talking to people like this. I'm not sure,

0:38:12.480 --> 0:38:15.680
<v Speaker 2>this is like I think I think I said it.

0:38:15.719 --> 0:38:17.400
<v Speaker 2>I think he would have done it. That's fine. But

0:38:17.440 --> 0:38:19.000
<v Speaker 2>he was just coming off of being the pets dot

0:38:19.040 --> 0:38:21.759
<v Speaker 2>Com sock puppet, so of course he was. He was

0:38:21.800 --> 0:38:24.160
<v Speaker 2>pretty pretty hot. Yeah, he was. He would be hot

0:38:24.160 --> 0:38:26.200
<v Speaker 2>share at that point. I would come sock puppet.

0:38:26.239 --> 0:38:28.520
<v Speaker 1>That was two years out from being a banana on

0:38:28.560 --> 0:38:30.839
<v Speaker 1>the Drew Carrey Show. So I was also, oh god,

0:38:31.040 --> 0:38:32.479
<v Speaker 1>also peking, that's a good one.

0:38:32.600 --> 0:38:40.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Nice.

0:38:42.120 --> 0:38:44.359
<v Speaker 1>That's lost media now the Drew carry Show. You can't

0:38:44.360 --> 0:38:45.000
<v Speaker 1>see it anywhere.

0:38:45.200 --> 0:38:45.960
<v Speaker 2>You can't see it all.

0:38:46.040 --> 0:38:46.120
<v Speaker 6>No.

0:38:46.520 --> 0:38:49.640
<v Speaker 1>I think maybe there's there's some kind of copyright this

0:38:49.760 --> 0:38:52.359
<v Speaker 1>shit going on with it with music or something, but

0:38:52.400 --> 0:38:54.719
<v Speaker 1>you can't see it on any of the streaming services.

0:38:54.760 --> 0:38:57.840
<v Speaker 2>I've kept the State off of DVD for like fifteen

0:38:57.920 --> 0:38:59.760
<v Speaker 2>twenty years. Yeah, I think it must be a similar

0:38:59.840 --> 0:39:01.759
<v Speaker 2>was a music thing, so we actually somebody had to

0:39:01.840 --> 0:39:05.800
<v Speaker 2>go through and replace every single piece of the famous music.

0:39:06.640 --> 0:39:09.000
<v Speaker 1>I think that's a situation.

0:39:08.280 --> 0:39:12.200
<v Speaker 2>It's a bummer. Yeah, it's something like that anyway. D

0:39:12.280 --> 0:39:16.279
<v Speaker 2>Drake Beder knows about it. He Drake is a fascinating cat.

0:39:16.400 --> 0:39:18.960
<v Speaker 2>He lives bucks away from me. Yeah, yeah, he's an

0:39:18.960 --> 0:39:19.520
<v Speaker 2>amazing guy.

0:39:19.600 --> 0:39:24.000
<v Speaker 1>He's one of the best actors I've ever worked with. Stunning,

0:39:24.160 --> 0:39:27.279
<v Speaker 1>He's an incredible actor. And there's a guy and I said,

0:39:27.320 --> 0:39:29.280
<v Speaker 1>he's been on this podcast and I said to him,

0:39:29.719 --> 0:39:30.640
<v Speaker 1>you really grew up.

0:39:30.680 --> 0:39:32.440
<v Speaker 2>I mean because he was when I first met him.

0:39:32.440 --> 0:39:36.600
<v Speaker 2>He's a bit of a deck and he's I think

0:39:36.680 --> 0:39:38.520
<v Speaker 2>he can come off like that sometimes. And this is

0:39:38.560 --> 0:39:41.279
<v Speaker 2>I say this, I love this man and we are

0:39:41.440 --> 0:39:46.480
<v Speaker 2>very close. I wrote, I wrote his daughter's uh application college?

0:39:47.960 --> 0:39:49.759
<v Speaker 2>Is that one of those? Is that? By the way,

0:39:49.800 --> 0:39:53.279
<v Speaker 2>she didn't get it? Okay, so I blew it. That

0:39:53.440 --> 0:39:57.040
<v Speaker 2>was such a great letter. I'm a great college letter writer. Yeah,

0:39:57.360 --> 0:40:01.000
<v Speaker 2>I go, I go aggressive. Yeah, that's prob. No, weird. No,

0:40:01.080 --> 0:40:03.839
<v Speaker 2>it's actually worked a bunch of times. Really. Yeah, Like

0:40:03.880 --> 0:40:06.399
<v Speaker 2>I write a college letter that starts with like, look,

0:40:07.080 --> 0:40:08.960
<v Speaker 2>you do not want to go to war with me?

0:40:10.760 --> 0:40:12.160
<v Speaker 2>And you know what, it's mostly worked out.

0:40:12.280 --> 0:40:15.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but yeah, No, you write the letter for the applicant.

0:40:16.000 --> 0:40:17.400
<v Speaker 1>Aren't they meant to write their own? No?

0:40:17.400 --> 0:40:20.120
<v Speaker 2>No, no, you got to you gotta go like a recommendation

0:40:20.200 --> 0:40:21.799
<v Speaker 2>left right, Okay, I've written a couple of them. Now,

0:40:21.800 --> 0:40:24.480
<v Speaker 2>I got a pretty good track record, right, Okay, well,

0:40:24.560 --> 0:40:26.799
<v Speaker 2>but I go funny. I mean, I go funny and

0:40:26.840 --> 0:40:29.879
<v Speaker 2>I go aggressive. Well, I've got one more to get

0:40:29.920 --> 0:40:33.400
<v Speaker 2>through college. So uh maybe for Liam's you can you

0:40:33.440 --> 0:40:35.400
<v Speaker 2>can do. Oh absolutely, I'll pull up big guns for

0:40:35.480 --> 0:40:38.959
<v Speaker 2>that one. Yeah, Liam, I know where we're going here.

0:40:39.760 --> 0:40:42.640
<v Speaker 2>My boy doesn't seem like college material and I love it.

0:40:43.480 --> 0:40:46.480
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, that's a million dollars I get to just keep. Yeah.

0:40:46.600 --> 0:40:49.880
<v Speaker 2>I don't know if Liam will go to college, but

0:40:50.000 --> 0:40:55.240
<v Speaker 2>they'll be statues. Yeah. I feel like, yeah, it's so funny.

0:40:55.239 --> 0:40:57.120
<v Speaker 2>Everybody's like, well, make sure the boy gets tutored and

0:40:57.160 --> 0:40:59.600
<v Speaker 2>really works hard and does these things. And I'm like, really,

0:41:00.320 --> 0:41:02.840
<v Speaker 2>because like to go where to go to like a

0:41:03.160 --> 0:41:04.640
<v Speaker 2>stuff you learn stuff on YouTube.

0:41:05.480 --> 0:41:09.040
<v Speaker 1>It's it's an interesting thing because I you know, Megan,

0:41:09.080 --> 0:41:13.200
<v Speaker 1>as you know is my wife is is a very

0:41:13.320 --> 0:41:19.720
<v Speaker 1>highly educated, clever Area day believer in academia. I dropped

0:41:19.719 --> 0:41:23.160
<v Speaker 1>out of high school when I was just turned sixteen,

0:41:24.080 --> 0:41:28.560
<v Speaker 1>and so she can sell the college thing to the kids,

0:41:28.640 --> 0:41:30.560
<v Speaker 1>but I can't, unfortunately.

0:41:30.719 --> 0:41:34.200
<v Speaker 2>But there's a like, well you know about it, yeah,

0:41:34.239 --> 0:41:38.880
<v Speaker 2>and how's the castle? Yeah? Yeah, you sure didn't have

0:41:38.920 --> 0:41:42.440
<v Speaker 2>to do. But that's that was luck. It was a

0:41:42.480 --> 0:41:44.440
<v Speaker 2>little bit a lot of work at Did you go

0:41:44.480 --> 0:41:45.439
<v Speaker 2>to college? I did?

0:41:45.440 --> 0:41:46.200
<v Speaker 1>I went to n YU.

0:41:46.440 --> 0:41:47.840
<v Speaker 2>Oh, yeah, of course you did, because that's for the

0:41:47.880 --> 0:41:48.279
<v Speaker 2>state thing.

0:41:48.440 --> 0:41:48.600
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:41:48.640 --> 0:41:51.240
<v Speaker 2>But the funny, funny detail. I was accepted to college

0:41:51.320 --> 0:41:55.920
<v Speaker 2>on academic probation because my high school grades were not great.

0:41:56.080 --> 0:41:57.600
<v Speaker 2>What were you going to study a college?

0:41:57.840 --> 0:41:57.960
<v Speaker 1>Uh?

0:41:58.040 --> 0:42:00.880
<v Speaker 2>Well, I actually I started at the theaters school. It

0:42:00.920 --> 0:42:04.200
<v Speaker 2>was handy because n YU was nice. You could audition because,

0:42:04.239 --> 0:42:04.480
<v Speaker 2>like I.

0:42:04.840 --> 0:42:08.080
<v Speaker 1>Seem that seems realistic for a theater skill idea.

0:42:08.360 --> 0:42:13.600
<v Speaker 2>But like Northwestern, uh, which was my first choice, I

0:42:13.640 --> 0:42:14.719
<v Speaker 2>wanted to go to the theater school.

0:42:14.840 --> 0:42:15.520
<v Speaker 1>There's no audition.

0:42:15.719 --> 0:42:17.080
<v Speaker 2>He's a ship actor, but he's great.

0:42:17.440 --> 0:42:19.040
<v Speaker 7>You just have to be smartest. You just have to

0:42:19.040 --> 0:42:22.560
<v Speaker 7>be smart, which how smart? Hope says, No, he don't know,

0:42:22.840 --> 0:42:25.960
<v Speaker 7>doesn't need to be I mean really a talking plant

0:42:26.239 --> 0:42:27.560
<v Speaker 7>a great actor.

0:42:27.800 --> 0:42:29.960
<v Speaker 2>You just have to be able to read a little bit.

0:42:30.120 --> 0:42:33.319
<v Speaker 2>You don't even really have to really, you know. So

0:42:33.760 --> 0:42:37.879
<v Speaker 2>I got a bold rejection from Northwestern, right, and Northwestern

0:42:38.280 --> 0:42:42.319
<v Speaker 2>and n YU accepted me with the asterisk. If I

0:42:42.360 --> 0:42:45.600
<v Speaker 2>got a C in any class in my freshman year,

0:42:45.600 --> 0:42:47.640
<v Speaker 2>I would be kicked out. Oh my god, which you

0:42:47.680 --> 0:42:51.759
<v Speaker 2>obviously did great motivators. Great, you know, dick around. So

0:42:52.520 --> 0:42:55.239
<v Speaker 2>did you finish college? I did, actually did finish. So

0:42:55.280 --> 0:42:58.200
<v Speaker 2>you're not fully qualified. I'm a fully qualified bachelor of

0:42:58.239 --> 0:43:00.759
<v Speaker 2>the arts, right, So if you have some arts that

0:43:00.840 --> 0:43:02.880
<v Speaker 2>need to be a bachelor.

0:43:03.680 --> 0:43:09.319
<v Speaker 1>I think that that could be a good show. It's

0:43:09.360 --> 0:43:14.680
<v Speaker 1>a dating show, Bachelor, and it's all the art Bachelor.

0:43:16.239 --> 0:43:19.680
<v Speaker 1>Do you ever go to the Met? Do you know

0:43:19.840 --> 0:43:23.799
<v Speaker 1>the Met when they have the French impressionists. That's really good,

0:43:23.880 --> 0:43:26.719
<v Speaker 1>isn't it. I really like that in there. So I

0:43:26.760 --> 0:43:29.239
<v Speaker 1>was in there the other day and they have I'm

0:43:29.239 --> 0:43:31.080
<v Speaker 1>looking at the French, which is the impression that you're

0:43:31.120 --> 0:43:33.799
<v Speaker 1>looking at somebody who likes specifically. Yeah, there was a

0:43:33.880 --> 0:43:35.160
<v Speaker 1>pretty I knew you were going to ask you this.

0:43:35.239 --> 0:43:37.680
<v Speaker 1>There was a Prisian street scene. I can't remember it,

0:43:38.000 --> 0:43:41.000
<v Speaker 1>and I love it. I just like going hanging out

0:43:41.080 --> 0:43:42.759
<v Speaker 1>near it. And I can't remember I who did it,

0:43:42.840 --> 0:43:46.560
<v Speaker 1>which I'm apologized, But you know what, it might be Renoir,

0:43:46.920 --> 0:43:49.400
<v Speaker 1>It might be I don't know sure. But I go

0:43:49.440 --> 0:43:51.720
<v Speaker 1>to the Van Go exhibit because the Van Go exhibits

0:43:51.760 --> 0:43:55.440
<v Speaker 1>on right now in the Met, and they have Starry

0:43:55.560 --> 0:43:58.120
<v Speaker 1>Night there and which is amazing.

0:43:58.360 --> 0:44:03.080
<v Speaker 2>It's an amazing, stunning same person. It has its own luminescence,

0:44:03.080 --> 0:44:05.480
<v Speaker 2>it creates its own lene. It's unbelievable.

0:44:06.000 --> 0:44:09.360
<v Speaker 1>But as I'm standing there, I have to pick my

0:44:09.400 --> 0:44:11.320
<v Speaker 1>moment to look at the picture because of everyone holding

0:44:11.360 --> 0:44:14.520
<v Speaker 1>their phone to take a picture. Just look at it, right.

0:44:14.600 --> 0:44:16.440
<v Speaker 1>But this is an interesting thing to me because I

0:44:16.480 --> 0:44:23.359
<v Speaker 1>think all performance, all human society is changing right now.

0:44:23.600 --> 0:44:28.920
<v Speaker 1>We're in a very odd place in human history where analogue, personal,

0:44:31.120 --> 0:44:37.759
<v Speaker 1>bionic personal memory is gone. Everything you will be remembered

0:44:38.160 --> 0:44:40.440
<v Speaker 1>like you can now make abba as they were when

0:44:40.440 --> 0:44:41.879
<v Speaker 1>you were a young man.

0:44:42.000 --> 0:44:43.880
<v Speaker 2>This is a problem because then I go to the

0:44:43.880 --> 0:44:45.560
<v Speaker 2>show and then I'm like, hey, can I go meet

0:44:45.560 --> 0:44:47.880
<v Speaker 2>her after? And they're like, sir, you can't meet She

0:44:47.960 --> 0:44:50.960
<v Speaker 2>doesn't she doesn't exist. And I'm like, I demand I

0:44:50.960 --> 0:44:51.319
<v Speaker 2>meet her.

0:44:51.360 --> 0:44:53.600
<v Speaker 1>And then you go there and it's the same roadie

0:44:53.600 --> 0:44:54.799
<v Speaker 1>that wouldn't let you in the.

0:44:57.760 --> 0:44:58.480
<v Speaker 2>Killing me you.

0:44:58.400 --> 0:45:02.719
<v Speaker 1>Want to go to see and yet you get through

0:45:02.760 --> 0:45:03.719
<v Speaker 1>there and.

0:45:03.680 --> 0:45:07.160
<v Speaker 2>She's not there. It's just like a little box. It's like,

0:45:06.040 --> 0:45:11.240
<v Speaker 2>you know, I'm all of the memories of an armor,

0:45:11.800 --> 0:45:12.000
<v Speaker 2>you know.

0:45:13.200 --> 0:45:17.480
<v Speaker 1>But it isn't a odd thing because memory is wonderful.

0:45:18.520 --> 0:45:21.399
<v Speaker 1>I like memory because I everybody remembers things a little

0:45:21.400 --> 0:45:22.919
<v Speaker 1>bit differently, but phones don't.

0:45:22.960 --> 0:45:28.040
<v Speaker 2>Phones remember exactly exactly correctly. And you'll soften it for you.

0:45:28.280 --> 0:45:29.799
<v Speaker 2>I wonder, because you know, we have a great big

0:45:30.160 --> 0:45:32.360
<v Speaker 2>computer in the kitchen in the house that always runs

0:45:32.520 --> 0:45:36.719
<v Speaker 2>your photo life. And is it does it make my

0:45:36.760 --> 0:45:39.520
<v Speaker 2>memory better or worse? Makes it worse? It makes it worse,

0:45:39.560 --> 0:45:42.520
<v Speaker 2>I'm sure of it, because you're just like, oh, at

0:45:42.520 --> 0:45:45.239
<v Speaker 2>some point I'll think about let me rephrase that. I

0:45:45.280 --> 0:45:47.000
<v Speaker 2>don't know if it makes it worse, it makes it different,

0:45:47.200 --> 0:45:49.600
<v Speaker 2>it's too accurate. Yeah, it's not human.

0:45:49.719 --> 0:45:52.960
<v Speaker 1>The human thing is that you create a story of

0:45:53.000 --> 0:45:55.960
<v Speaker 1>what happened. Remember that time we went to the pizza

0:45:56.080 --> 0:45:59.200
<v Speaker 1>place and you took your pants off, you know, and

0:45:59.239 --> 0:46:00.479
<v Speaker 1>your dad stuff the things.

0:46:01.200 --> 0:46:05.359
<v Speaker 2>You can have a real fondness. I think I do too,

0:46:05.440 --> 0:46:08.879
<v Speaker 2>for you know, like there's so I have so many

0:46:08.880 --> 0:46:12.799
<v Speaker 2>ex girlfriends that I have one photograph of if or

0:46:12.880 --> 0:46:15.960
<v Speaker 2>if barely right, you know, and that's like such a

0:46:16.000 --> 0:46:19.640
<v Speaker 2>neat you know, in a way, it's like it's kind

0:46:19.640 --> 0:46:22.759
<v Speaker 2>of more interesting because yeah, yeah, yeah, and you have

0:46:22.800 --> 0:46:24.880
<v Speaker 2>to think about it. Yeah, I went to I went

0:46:24.960 --> 0:46:28.560
<v Speaker 2>to London with Susan for like two weeks and there's

0:46:28.600 --> 0:46:30.360
<v Speaker 2>almost no photos of it at all. It was just

0:46:30.440 --> 0:46:32.839
<v Speaker 2>like a I know, I have to think about it.

0:46:33.160 --> 0:46:36.440
<v Speaker 1>And I wonder, though, I wonder what happens with that,

0:46:36.520 --> 0:46:40.200
<v Speaker 1>because no matter how much Quadure is like me and

0:46:40.719 --> 0:46:43.680
<v Speaker 1>you will approach quaduredom I'm very close. Well you get there,

0:46:44.360 --> 0:46:45.560
<v Speaker 1>it's not gonna change anything.

0:46:45.560 --> 0:46:45.840
<v Speaker 2>It's not.

0:46:45.920 --> 0:46:47.759
<v Speaker 1>You can complain about it, but it's not gonna it's

0:46:47.800 --> 0:46:50.839
<v Speaker 1>not gonna change anything. And I wonder if that's just

0:46:51.000 --> 0:46:53.360
<v Speaker 1>what it's like to get old. It's like just the

0:46:53.400 --> 0:46:55.839
<v Speaker 1>world starts to seem scary and alien, and it's not

0:46:55.960 --> 0:46:57.200
<v Speaker 1>really scary and alien.

0:46:57.239 --> 0:46:59.600
<v Speaker 2>It's just this is a great question. I've wondered this

0:46:59.680 --> 0:47:05.040
<v Speaker 2>exact thing, because the world does seem pretty scary right now,

0:47:05.160 --> 0:47:08.640
<v Speaker 2>even walking here to this strange, a pretty sketchy area

0:47:08.680 --> 0:47:10.840
<v Speaker 2>of Hollywood. I mean, this is be scary for a

0:47:10.880 --> 0:47:16.120
<v Speaker 2>good fifty years were peg in the meter. But yeah,

0:47:16.360 --> 0:47:20.400
<v Speaker 2>like I wonder, am I just growing into the phase

0:47:20.440 --> 0:47:23.719
<v Speaker 2>where I bitch about everything? Yeah? You know, yeah, like

0:47:24.239 --> 0:47:26.040
<v Speaker 2>does everybody just do that at some point?

0:47:26.320 --> 0:47:30.520
<v Speaker 7>I don't know it just like my Abba was better, Yeah,

0:47:30.560 --> 0:47:31.800
<v Speaker 7>she was a human, lady.

0:47:32.160 --> 0:47:39.160
<v Speaker 2>Human I prefer robots is not perfect. I would go

0:47:39.160 --> 0:47:42.239
<v Speaker 2>see album and sometimes they would mess up. No, come on, man,

0:47:42.800 --> 0:47:43.360
<v Speaker 2>you went to you.

0:47:45.040 --> 0:47:47.160
<v Speaker 1>May have got a bet too fat at that point,

0:47:47.600 --> 0:47:51.919
<v Speaker 1>but I wonder, I don't, I don't know. It might be,

0:47:53.120 --> 0:47:55.440
<v Speaker 1>but I think that's okay too. Yeah, I think you

0:47:55.560 --> 0:47:59.359
<v Speaker 1>have to embrace the strangeness of aging. This is I'm

0:47:59.360 --> 0:48:01.680
<v Speaker 1>talking to myself because you're not at that point. I'm

0:48:01.680 --> 0:48:02.840
<v Speaker 1>getting real, real, real close.

0:48:02.920 --> 0:48:05.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, fucking sixty one though, Tom, I mean, yeah, it's

0:48:05.960 --> 0:48:09.160
<v Speaker 2>on the age that my my grandfather, who basically was

0:48:09.160 --> 0:48:14.560
<v Speaker 2>my identical twin, dropped dead. So I just kind of, yeah,

0:48:14.960 --> 0:48:17.319
<v Speaker 2>you gotta make Hey what did he talk about, van

0:48:17.320 --> 0:48:21.200
<v Speaker 2>go make Hay while the sun shines? Yeah, a strange

0:48:21.200 --> 0:48:25.400
<v Speaker 2>experimental He had looked at me about a drug that

0:48:25.480 --> 0:48:28.879
<v Speaker 2>he was allergic to ended up killing him. Right, We're

0:48:28.960 --> 0:48:31.200
<v Speaker 2>not talking last week then, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

0:48:31.400 --> 0:48:32.400
<v Speaker 2>this is I was a child.

0:48:32.520 --> 0:48:35.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, right, so but these things, you know, I think

0:48:35.640 --> 0:48:38.960
<v Speaker 1>that my dad when he was my age, had been

0:48:39.040 --> 0:48:40.600
<v Speaker 1>retired for a year.

0:48:41.280 --> 0:48:45.840
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but life of a glass Wigan.

0:48:46.239 --> 0:48:53.960
<v Speaker 1>Yeah yeah, now yeah, come year, Brack was so outside

0:48:54.040 --> 0:48:56.239
<v Speaker 1>the it's a little different. But I started, you know,

0:48:56.360 --> 0:48:58.120
<v Speaker 1>you know, I fucking started brushing my teeth.

0:48:59.560 --> 0:49:02.640
<v Speaker 2>That's what brush your teeth.

0:49:05.000 --> 0:49:05.080
<v Speaker 5>For.

0:49:05.160 --> 0:49:07.920
<v Speaker 2>God, brush your teeth brought last time I went to Ashole,

0:49:08.000 --> 0:49:09.879
<v Speaker 2>when I went to see you in Scotland a butter

0:49:09.960 --> 0:49:12.040
<v Speaker 2>t shirt that's there was such a great T shirt

0:49:12.040 --> 0:49:15.239
<v Speaker 2>that says says people make Glasgow and I love this

0:49:15.320 --> 0:49:16.520
<v Speaker 2>shirt and I wear it all the time. And then

0:49:16.560 --> 0:49:19.040
<v Speaker 2>I looked up the hashtag of people make Glasgow and

0:49:19.360 --> 0:49:23.800
<v Speaker 2>it's always the worst fights. It's a guy. There's like

0:49:23.840 --> 0:49:26.560
<v Speaker 2>a naked guy fighting a lady and he uses a

0:49:26.640 --> 0:49:27.720
<v Speaker 2>bike as a weapon.

0:49:28.880 --> 0:49:29.359
<v Speaker 1>I know that.

0:49:29.760 --> 0:49:34.400
<v Speaker 2>Have you seen under always under the hashtag people make Glasgow.

0:49:35.000 --> 0:49:38.359
<v Speaker 2>We do that in our family, so funny.

0:49:38.160 --> 0:49:41.120
<v Speaker 1>Send each other things the worst use oh my god.

0:49:41.160 --> 0:49:42.800
<v Speaker 2>But it's always got that upbeat hashtag.

0:49:43.719 --> 0:49:46.120
<v Speaker 1>I can't remember exactly, but there was one about a

0:49:46.239 --> 0:49:56.200
<v Speaker 1>nurse who lost her lawsuit for an unfair dismissal because.

0:49:56.040 --> 0:49:58.920
<v Speaker 6>She had a field come and see had claimed that

0:49:58.920 --> 0:50:02.640
<v Speaker 6>there was a ghost and in the hospital that was

0:50:02.760 --> 0:50:06.000
<v Speaker 6>farthing and blaming it on her and she got fired

0:50:06.040 --> 0:50:06.640
<v Speaker 6>because of that.

0:50:06.680 --> 0:50:08.759
<v Speaker 2>People make Glasgow. People make Glasgow.

0:50:12.239 --> 0:50:14.080
<v Speaker 1>I mean it's quite a place, but of course it's

0:50:14.080 --> 0:50:16.920
<v Speaker 1>a very odd hybrid of Ireland in Scotland.

0:50:16.960 --> 0:50:21.920
<v Speaker 2>Glasgow. I really like Glasgow. Fucking old hybrid of Ireland

0:50:21.920 --> 0:50:24.400
<v Speaker 2>in America. I am mostly Ireland.

0:50:24.719 --> 0:50:24.920
<v Speaker 1>I know.

0:50:25.040 --> 0:50:26.400
<v Speaker 2>Last time I was in Glasgow, I want to go

0:50:26.480 --> 0:50:29.600
<v Speaker 2>see you. It was it was one hundred and two

0:50:29.600 --> 0:50:32.040
<v Speaker 2>degrees in Glasgow. Yeah, that's right, go weird there. It

0:50:32.080 --> 0:50:35.160
<v Speaker 2>was really intense. It's strange. It's not now it's very good, yeah,

0:50:35.160 --> 0:50:37.839
<v Speaker 2>because it was Actually Glasgow at one hundred and two

0:50:37.960 --> 0:50:40.399
<v Speaker 2>is not good because you know what happens. It's tough.

0:50:40.640 --> 0:50:43.560
<v Speaker 1>People start coming out wearing what they think is the

0:50:43.719 --> 0:50:47.200
<v Speaker 1>appropriate clothing for hot weather, and it's.

0:50:47.160 --> 0:50:50.680
<v Speaker 2>Not fucking pretty. Then I went to Garvin Beach where

0:50:50.719 --> 0:50:54.440
<v Speaker 2>with weird Al Yankovic and Weird Alan Allen's family, and

0:50:54.480 --> 0:50:57.000
<v Speaker 2>we went to a great little I'm not going to

0:50:57.040 --> 0:51:02.719
<v Speaker 2>say the name of it, right, we'll bleep it right

0:51:02.760 --> 0:51:06.000
<v Speaker 2>around the corner and oh yeah, and I decided to

0:51:06.080 --> 0:51:09.680
<v Speaker 2>try like the spicy wet pork. And I never eat

0:51:09.960 --> 0:51:12.600
<v Speaker 2>I don't meat meat hardly really. Ever, what I did

0:51:12.719 --> 0:51:14.759
<v Speaker 2>was doing a win in Rome thing. Right, So it's

0:51:14.800 --> 0:51:17.920
<v Speaker 2>one hundred and two in Glasgow. You had spicy web pork.

0:51:18.080 --> 0:51:22.279
<v Speaker 2>Oh oh was it good? No, car, it wasn't good.

0:51:22.280 --> 0:51:25.560
<v Speaker 2>It's a good buddy. Hadn't dealt with pork in like

0:51:25.600 --> 0:51:28.160
<v Speaker 2>a kind of a long time, and it was. It

0:51:28.239 --> 0:51:31.040
<v Speaker 2>was one of the roughest nights of my entire life.

0:51:31.320 --> 0:51:36.000
<v Speaker 2>Just a long walk because you're gurgling full of yeah, yeah.

0:51:36.080 --> 0:51:38.520
<v Speaker 2>I had that once in Paris. Actually I had.

0:51:38.680 --> 0:51:42.280
<v Speaker 1>I had been vegan for four years, and I thought,

0:51:42.520 --> 0:51:48.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm having an ice cream. Oh, just the lactose dairy

0:51:48.640 --> 0:51:52.160
<v Speaker 1>ice cream colon, having not had dairy for four years.

0:51:52.239 --> 0:51:56.759
<v Speaker 2>No, my tough to a bathroom in Paris, I'll tell you.

0:51:56.800 --> 0:52:00.399
<v Speaker 1>I was accepting anything anything like a whole with foot

0:52:00.440 --> 0:52:01.360
<v Speaker 1>pads on either side.

0:52:01.600 --> 0:52:01.839
<v Speaker 2>Tough.

0:52:02.680 --> 0:52:06.280
<v Speaker 1>And there was a lot on the way home anyway,

0:52:06.760 --> 0:52:08.319
<v Speaker 1>you know. That's that's why I had a long walk.

0:52:08.560 --> 0:52:09.680
<v Speaker 1>Pooping through Paris.

0:52:09.719 --> 0:52:13.800
<v Speaker 2>Pooping through Paris, you gotta you gotta do it once.

0:52:13.840 --> 0:52:16.000
<v Speaker 1>See, that's how romantic Paris is, even when you've got

0:52:16.040 --> 0:52:17.520
<v Speaker 1>the trots, it's kind of romantic.

0:52:17.600 --> 0:52:18.279
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely.

0:52:18.400 --> 0:52:21.400
<v Speaker 1>All right, Well we're kind of done here, Okay, we

0:52:21.520 --> 0:52:23.919
<v Speaker 1>established what is joy for you?

0:52:24.120 --> 0:52:28.880
<v Speaker 2>I will say, and it may seem silly. I would

0:52:28.880 --> 0:52:35.400
<v Speaker 2>write sketches every day for the joy of it. I

0:52:35.440 --> 0:52:38.520
<v Speaker 2>would sit for absolutely for no one, and I would

0:52:38.560 --> 0:52:42.160
<v Speaker 2>just I could, I could write every day for no

0:52:42.239 --> 0:52:48.359
<v Speaker 2>one but myself and love it and truly truly love it.

0:52:48.719 --> 0:52:51.279
<v Speaker 2>I think that's kind of nice. Yeah, I mean it's

0:52:51.320 --> 0:52:53.640
<v Speaker 2>a little bit cheesy, but it No, it's not cheap.

0:52:53.719 --> 0:52:56.040
<v Speaker 2>Sometimes I people will send me either they'll send me

0:52:56.120 --> 0:52:58.279
<v Speaker 2>their kid or something and be like, hey, you got

0:52:58.280 --> 0:53:01.120
<v Speaker 2>to tell my kid how to write movies. Yeah, you're

0:53:01.120 --> 0:53:03.400
<v Speaker 2>gonna take my kid. Kid. Somebody will be like, well,

0:53:03.400 --> 0:53:05.120
<v Speaker 2>you get on like a zoom and just tell my

0:53:05.239 --> 0:53:05.920
<v Speaker 2>kid what they do.

0:53:06.000 --> 0:53:07.440
<v Speaker 1>So they don't like to send the kid around to

0:53:07.440 --> 0:53:09.680
<v Speaker 1>your house. No, God, No, that's kind of weird, you

0:53:09.719 --> 0:53:12.719
<v Speaker 1>know what. Yeah, But and then that's my my question

0:53:12.840 --> 0:53:16.600
<v Speaker 1>is always, would you do this every day for free?

0:53:17.000 --> 0:53:23.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah? Because mostly you will. I'm like, hey, yeah, mostly

0:53:23.800 --> 0:53:28.160
<v Speaker 2>you're gone. That's fucking true. Yeah, the paydays are sometimes.

0:53:29.000 --> 0:53:30.839
<v Speaker 1>But you know what's weird about it, because I totally

0:53:30.880 --> 0:53:33.120
<v Speaker 1>agree with you. But the weird thing is is that,

0:53:33.440 --> 0:53:39.440
<v Speaker 1>like I I tried to retire and I couldn't because

0:53:39.600 --> 0:53:42.160
<v Speaker 1>I haven't been working since I worked in the fucking

0:53:42.200 --> 0:53:44.440
<v Speaker 1>bar in Glasgow. I haven't had a real job for

0:53:44.560 --> 0:53:45.560
<v Speaker 1>forty years.

0:53:46.719 --> 0:53:49.920
<v Speaker 2>But you worked real hard yep, But it felt like fun.

0:53:49.960 --> 0:53:52.120
<v Speaker 2>It's kind of war. It felt like fun. Yeah, it's

0:53:52.200 --> 0:53:54.439
<v Speaker 2>kind of dicking around. It doesn't doesn't feel like work.

0:53:54.520 --> 0:53:55.399
<v Speaker 2>Doesn't feel like work.

0:53:56.000 --> 0:53:57.560
<v Speaker 1>And then the times when I've tried to work, like

0:53:57.600 --> 0:54:00.680
<v Speaker 1>when I directed movies and stuff like that, they suck

0:54:01.360 --> 0:54:04.239
<v Speaker 1>because I don't like doing that.

0:54:04.360 --> 0:54:08.200
<v Speaker 2>I don't like doing that either, especially I especially hate directing.

0:54:08.520 --> 0:54:11.719
<v Speaker 2>Oh it's awful. It's not my apparently, it's not my personality.

0:54:11.880 --> 0:54:15.320
<v Speaker 2>No mine, neither. I meet folks who have that personality

0:54:15.360 --> 0:54:17.439
<v Speaker 2>and they're great at it. They're still great at it. Yeah,

0:54:17.800 --> 0:54:22.680
<v Speaker 2>but it's a very different level of drive to be

0:54:22.880 --> 0:54:25.160
<v Speaker 2>that sort of person and I think I'm Once I

0:54:25.239 --> 0:54:28.960
<v Speaker 2>got over the idea of this want to direct notion

0:54:29.120 --> 0:54:32.560
<v Speaker 2>that everybody had. I had that once you get over it,

0:54:33.040 --> 0:54:35.160
<v Speaker 2>you're gonna feel better. I had it, you know.

0:54:35.239 --> 0:54:36.800
<v Speaker 1>When I really knew it was over for me, I

0:54:36.800 --> 0:54:39.239
<v Speaker 1>had a conversation with Quentin Tarantino about now you can

0:54:39.320 --> 0:54:40.040
<v Speaker 1>direct like crazy?

0:54:40.120 --> 0:54:40.520
<v Speaker 2>Oh sure?

0:54:40.960 --> 0:54:42.640
<v Speaker 1>And so I was telling them that I didn't enjoy

0:54:42.719 --> 0:54:45.480
<v Speaker 1>the directing experience, and he said, well, didn't you have

0:54:45.760 --> 0:54:47.960
<v Speaker 1>the whole movie in your head before you shot it?

0:54:48.040 --> 0:54:51.320
<v Speaker 1>And I said no, and he went, well, I do

0:54:51.440 --> 0:54:53.719
<v Speaker 1>when I make a movie, of course. Well there, no,

0:54:53.840 --> 0:54:55.600
<v Speaker 1>there we go, there we go. That's why you're Quentin

0:54:55.680 --> 0:54:58.239
<v Speaker 1>Tarantino and I'm the cheeky monkey man l.

0:55:01.160 --> 0:55:03.400
<v Speaker 2>But there you go. All right, Tom, Well you you

0:55:03.600 --> 0:55:07.320
<v Speaker 2>are a joy. By the way. The other thing that

0:55:07.360 --> 0:55:09.960
<v Speaker 2>brings me joy, I would say, is like I think

0:55:09.960 --> 0:55:12.440
<v Speaker 2>I came on your show. Oh gosh, oh are we

0:55:12.520 --> 0:55:15.319
<v Speaker 2>have fifteen twenty years ago now thirty something times? Yeah,

0:55:15.680 --> 0:55:19.080
<v Speaker 2>but that I still consider my friendship with you is

0:55:19.160 --> 0:55:22.480
<v Speaker 2>something that has brought me a tremendous amount of joy. Yeah.

0:55:23.200 --> 0:55:25.520
<v Speaker 2>It's knowing your family.

0:55:25.600 --> 0:55:29.160
<v Speaker 1>Meeting and you're fucking weird, you know, and you're and

0:55:29.480 --> 0:55:34.239
<v Speaker 1>I like that because I've got some friends who aren't there.

0:55:35.960 --> 0:55:38.080
<v Speaker 1>You've also got some really cool friends with some fucking

0:55:38.160 --> 0:55:38.839
<v Speaker 1>great weird friends.

0:55:39.360 --> 0:55:40.880
<v Speaker 4>I really do, not really do.

0:55:41.239 --> 0:55:44.320
<v Speaker 2>My life is really a Wes Anderson movie. It actually is.

0:55:44.440 --> 0:55:46.759
<v Speaker 2>It really is live in a fucking Wes Anderson movie.

0:55:46.840 --> 0:55:49.719
<v Speaker 2>My own time. It's a good one. But if Wes

0:55:49.800 --> 0:55:51.560
<v Speaker 2>Anderson was to look at my life and be like,

0:55:51.960 --> 0:55:57.319
<v Speaker 2>it's a little yeah, yeah, it's down, Yeah, it's too much. Well,

0:55:57.400 --> 0:56:02.040
<v Speaker 2>I mean this is beyond royal tattle ball. All right,

0:56:02.120 --> 0:56:03.439
<v Speaker 2>we gotta go the best