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Speaker 1: Wind Down with Jane Kramer and I'm heart radio podcast.

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Speaker 2: Friend. Holy Matt, You're not supposed to be here, and

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Speaker 2: either is this baby? Why am I still pregnant? So

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Speaker 2: last Thursday we had an episode and you texted me saying,

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Speaker 2: all right, yeah, you're like, bs, I'm really trying to

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Speaker 2: have his baby before you head out of town and

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Speaker 2: my husband heads out of town. Well you sew this.

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Speaker 2: Let's see. So a week ago, a week ago, six

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Speaker 2: days ago, I wake up and I'm having contractions every

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Speaker 2: three to five minutes, and you thought, did you think

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Speaker 2: you're for sure having the baby? Then?

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Speaker 1: No?

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Speaker 2: But I was like, well, I'm not not having a baby,

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Speaker 2: you know right. It's like a weird feeling because I'm like, well,

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Speaker 2: doesn't feel this intense, but it is. And my obi

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Speaker 2: was like, you should probably just go into triage have

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Speaker 2: him check you out. And she's not a panicker, so

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Speaker 2: I was like, hmm, she definitely feels something, you know,

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Speaker 2: no dilation. It's like such a defeating feeling. So they

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Speaker 2: sent me home, and honestly, I hope somebody can relate

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Speaker 2: to this. I feel like a lot of it is

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Speaker 2: just the noise and the stress around me and my

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Speaker 2: body right now, Like me and my bodies feel really

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Speaker 2: good about this baby. The baby and I are like

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Speaker 2: in alignment. God loves us. We're ready to rock when

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Speaker 2: it's time. There's so many moving pieces around us. Like

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Speaker 2: my husband is touring and will he's starting to go

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Speaker 2: further away, so he goes to Utah, Denver, New Mexico.

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Speaker 2: That feels very far if you're going to have a

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Speaker 2: third baby, and it could be quick. Yeah, So just

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Speaker 2: gets noisy and I just feel like all of that.

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Speaker 2: So you know, it's like everyone's like hyper checking in

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Speaker 2: on you, tour managers all the things, Like there's like

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Speaker 2: three camps of people going. So you feel, how do

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Speaker 2: you feel? It's like I've never had such a public

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Speaker 2: cervix in all my life, Like can I just publix?

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Speaker 2: I just be pregnant and just patiently await a baby.

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Speaker 2: But I can't well, I mean, selfishly, it's been I'm like,

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Speaker 2: can we like have a sea section? You were like

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Speaker 2: you were actually I have to share the selfish moment.

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Speaker 2: I was texting you and I was like I just

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Speaker 2: don't know what's happening, and like there's no dilation. I'm

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Speaker 2: not I haven't been a water breaker before, so I

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Speaker 2: don't anticipate that happening this time, but you never know.

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Speaker 2: And you're like, you can elect for a sea section,

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Speaker 2: we can have a sea section right now. And I

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Speaker 2: was like, oh, I love you so much. The artist

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Speaker 2: doesn't sneak up much, but when it does, well, No,

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Speaker 2: my doctor had always like when I was pregnant with Jolie,

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Speaker 2: she was like, or you can have the baby at

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Speaker 2: thirty nine weeks and do a sea section. Yeah, I haven't.

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Speaker 2: I hit thirty nine weeks like today, so it was

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Speaker 2: just a little early in my Yeah, it's just really

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Speaker 2: been something. Anyways, I was up all night contracting, So

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Speaker 2: that's great news, I hope. So most likely, well, I

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Speaker 2: mean I'm not this is all. This is going to

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Speaker 2: actually kind of make me sad. This is the last, man.

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Speaker 2: I am not emotionally stable enough for all the last

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Speaker 2: It's a lot of last I know, the last time

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Speaker 2: being in this house, in this room doing wind down,

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Speaker 2: the last time you will I mean the baby, the

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Speaker 2: night time you have you do wind down, you'll have

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Speaker 2: a baby. This is my last with baby podcasts. I

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Speaker 2: got emotional on our last wind down two or two. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I just love it so much. Yeah, I don't want

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Speaker 2: to be gone long. Well you won't, okay alive from

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Speaker 2: Centennial Hospital. Can we do that? I'm just kidding you know, ma'am.

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Speaker 2: But we were sad to miss you last Thursday. It's

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Speaker 2: always uh, and we will be sad to miss you.

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Speaker 2: I don't necessarily have to miss too much. No, I

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Speaker 2: mean you've known. You were my first call when I

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Speaker 2: found out I was pregnant. Love that we get to

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Speaker 2: say it out loud. Yeah, this is a really everything

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Speaker 2: to me. Oh yeah, if we've really been in it.

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Speaker 2: I have FaceTime pictures of you and I both times

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Speaker 2: i've been in labor. I really would prefer it if

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Speaker 2: it was like in person. Yeah, but we can do

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Speaker 2: that again if we have to. When I called you,

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Speaker 2: did you what like? What was your first initial when

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Speaker 2: I told you that I was pregnant because we never

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Speaker 2: got to have like your we got like Catherine's. And

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Speaker 2: did you think that I would even though I've told

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Speaker 2: I said no to like I wouldn't have another kid?

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Speaker 2: Did you think I would have? Yes? I thought you'd

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Speaker 2: have another one? Really? Yeah, Alan's handsome and you guys

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Speaker 2: just are magic. I mean, and I like it when

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Speaker 2: our plans get thrown out the window and God has

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Speaker 2: bigger plans, especially for people with our personality type. Do

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Speaker 2: you know where I struggle though? And I'm not trying

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Speaker 2: to get like no, tell me everything. Yeah. So the

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Speaker 2: last so Thursday's episode, this before I went back to

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Speaker 2: my guy now and because you know, I had that

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Speaker 2: hemorrhage or whatever. Yes, I didn't know how much everyone knows. Well,

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Speaker 2: I told that I was bleeding for the first trimester,

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Speaker 2: which was scary awful. Yeah, I mean because that was

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Speaker 2: the reason why I didn't want to have another one,

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Speaker 2: because I just don't want to go through another miscarriage again.

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Speaker 2: So I think so many people relate to that. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, it's I even feel it right now,

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Speaker 2: Like if I don't feel a baby, right, it's the

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Speaker 2: scarcity mentality sticks with you. It's the PTSD, right. So

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Speaker 2: the whole like hemorrhage, hemorrhage, hemorrhage thing has been so

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Speaker 2: like just like scary, you know. And so what we

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Speaker 2: go back and they're like, great news, your hemorrhage is

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Speaker 2: down below you know, it's like below two centimeter. She's

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Speaker 2: like bad news. And I'm like like why, you know, like,

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Speaker 2: can I just have good good news? Can it? Just

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Speaker 2: like she's like, you're fibroid. She's like, has like pretty

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Speaker 2: much doubled in size. I means that doubled. But she's like,

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Speaker 2: it's one of the on the larger ones we've seen.

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Speaker 2: And then don't go to Google because I'm goovering you know,

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Speaker 2: large fibroid, you know, with the size of mine, and

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Speaker 2: because right now it's at eleven centimeters okay, and like

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Speaker 2: a large is like ten to fifteen. And she's like,

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Speaker 2: if it keeps growing, we're gonna have She's like, and

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Speaker 2: we could already have. She's like, we can have issues.

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Speaker 2: We can not have issues. And I'm like, okay, what

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Speaker 2: are like because I like to be in the no right,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, what are the issues? Like what could happen?

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Speaker 2: And She's like explaining all the stuff to me and

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Speaker 2: I'm just like, oh my god. And then you know,

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Speaker 2: but then but then the flip side's like or it

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Speaker 2: could be fine. So there's nothing they can do, right, No,

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Speaker 2: they can't. They can't go in and get it. Now

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Speaker 2: what I didn't think and this is what's so great

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Speaker 2: that will shrink it? No, I've done like I've looked

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Speaker 2: and Google, so like, which so crazy is that I

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Speaker 2: I had like stomach pain before I was pregnant and

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Speaker 2: I was a little bloated, and so everyone was just like, oh,

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Speaker 2: it's your gut, your gut, your gut. So I was

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Speaker 2: like doing gut stuff. Well, now, come to find out,

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Speaker 2: it's because I have this massive fibroid. Yeah, like huge, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: so I should have it would have you should take

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Speaker 2: those out before, But I didn't know, Like how would

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Speaker 2: I know that I had a fibroid. It's not like

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Speaker 2: I'm going to get like ultra sounds on my stomach

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Speaker 2: or whatever. So but long story short, I'm just kind

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Speaker 2: of like, so now when I go do the movie,

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Speaker 2: she's making me, not making me, but she's like, you,

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Speaker 2: we need to see what this fibroid's doing because it's

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Speaker 2: like a blood sucking it'll try to take the placenta.

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Speaker 2: And I'm like if I well, I want I know.

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Speaker 2: And that's where I was like starting to struggle. Was

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Speaker 2: just like I won't be able to make sense of

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Speaker 2: God blessing and then God taking you know what I mean,

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Speaker 2: Like I didn't think that this is like I'm this

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Speaker 2: is such a miracle, baby anyways, like, how in the

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Speaker 2: world did I get pregnant so easy? So it isn't

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Speaker 2: on any medicine easy, and like that never happened before.

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Speaker 2: I was like, you know, having to do the IVFS

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Speaker 2: and then this and then that and the like having

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Speaker 2: to have the progesterone in my body for the other two.

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Speaker 2: I think that's why that worked. But I'm like every

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Speaker 2: other time i'd lose I'm like, how So it's just

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Speaker 2: like it's a lot. So we just need to like

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Speaker 2: if anyone has because I'm like a Googling like fiend

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Speaker 2: right now, be like, okay, massive fibroids, you know, like

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Speaker 2: healthy pregnancies, and I just like I don't see any

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Speaker 2: forms or anything. So if there's anyone that had a

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Speaker 2: very large vibroid right next to your baby when you're pregnant,

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Speaker 2: can you please DM me? Because I just want someone.

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Speaker 2: I want to talk to someone about it. Yeah, and

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Speaker 2: also liked scary Yeah, and I'd like good story, but

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Speaker 2: I mean I want to hear all of it. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: But also I think there's probably more good stories than

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Speaker 2: Google likes to share too. Google sucks Google well for

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Speaker 2: a lot of reasons. Where would you like to start

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Speaker 2: it is tricky though, Like I do feel like it's

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Speaker 2: the noise, Like that's where I got to last week,

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Speaker 2: Like I got home from the hospital and I just

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Speaker 2: got in a bathtub and I was like, I need

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Speaker 2: to shut the door in present's like got it. I

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Speaker 2: just feel like we don't even get a chance to

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Speaker 2: like listen to our own heart beats because everything is

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Speaker 2: like so noisy and so catastrophic, and it can be

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Speaker 2: those things. I'm not living in a false reality, but

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Speaker 2: I'm also like, okay, but also can I just have

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Speaker 2: a minute to like remember whose I am? Who gifted

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Speaker 2: me this baby, Who's gonna walk me through this baby?

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Speaker 2: Because God and I have done a lot of ear

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Speaker 2: bending with each other. But that's where I have a

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Speaker 2: hard time, because I'm like the babies that like this

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Speaker 2: still bursts and the like the myth I'm just like,

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Speaker 2: and I can look at it now now having my

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Speaker 2: children going Okay, these were I understand, but I wouldn't.

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Speaker 2: I hope I will never have to make sense of

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Speaker 2: right that I will say this. Do you remember Okay,

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Speaker 2: so you know a year It's been over a year

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Speaker 2: since I walked the still birth with my friend Ashley

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Speaker 2: Micah James. We talked about him on Windown. Little baby

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Speaker 2: born at six months in utero, one pound, one ounce,

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Speaker 2: precious little man. She had her baby last week. Oh

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Speaker 2: I love that, I know, and I have to share

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Speaker 2: this because this is really hopeful too. So she and

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Speaker 2: I were the only two women in that room that

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Speaker 2: walked that together, and we both were due within like

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Speaker 2: a day of each other with these babies.

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Speaker 1: I know.

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Speaker 2: And she had her sweet little boy, Knox Isaiah, six

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Speaker 2: pounds three ounces, like three days before Hermiicah James anniversary.

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Speaker 2: I love that. See that's like and those stories are amazing.

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Speaker 2: I love that. And what I said last week is

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Speaker 2: I was like, I like, I'm done after this. So

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Speaker 2: it's like, oh please, this is where I've been. So

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Speaker 2: the four of us can't be together on a podcast.

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Speaker 2: So that's where I'm like, please work. No, it's gonna work.

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Speaker 2: It's gonna work. But there's just there's so many like

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Speaker 2: and you don't know, there's just never stressors. But I'm

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Speaker 2: just like, oh my god, Like it's like like because

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Speaker 2: I just I wouldn't this was this is it? This

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Speaker 2: was a one and done. Yeah, you know, it's so

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Speaker 2: crazy because I have tried to keep myself in such

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Speaker 2: a positive place, but the what ifs are so real. Well,

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Speaker 2: and it's the thing is like, you know, we have

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Speaker 2: a name for this, babes, and it's like it's so

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Speaker 2: you know what it is too, it all matters. And

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Speaker 2: it's like I just can't imagine people that, like, I know,

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Speaker 2: but I like that, I just could not imagine because

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Speaker 2: I've like seen like people like my friends just had

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Speaker 2: a still birth, and I'm like, I can't, like I

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Speaker 2: can't imagine. I know, but God does walk you not

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Speaker 2: trying to be like all niggies, you know what I mean. No, no, no,

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Speaker 2: I mean I just I walked it with her so

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Speaker 2: intimately that I'm just I've just never seen. That was

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Speaker 2: the most sacred anointed space I've ever been a part

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Speaker 2: of in my entire life. I can't describe how that

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Speaker 2: was probably the most the closest to God in the

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Speaker 2: thinnest place I've ever been in my life. Hmm. And

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Speaker 2: there and that baby didn't cry. Oh it's gonna be

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Speaker 2: I'm just I know, but it does. Matt. I mean,

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Speaker 2: it's like He will just never bring us somewhere he

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Speaker 2: can't get us through. Yeah, he just won't look at us. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: holy shit, look at us right, Yeah, for sure, And

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Speaker 2: I know everything always like I think it's just like,

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Speaker 2: well also early, you know, second try master, it's just scary.

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Speaker 2: It's just it's a I well, also, you love you're

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Speaker 2: a good moms. If you were like, yeah, give or take,

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Speaker 2: I mean I'd be really questioning, you know, like this

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Speaker 2: is a you love your people so well, yeah, and

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Speaker 2: it's fair to be scared. We just have to go

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Speaker 2: one day at a time. I know, I text this

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Speaker 2: to you the other day, but I was like, I

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Speaker 2: think for our people specifically, we love like a plan,

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Speaker 2: we love. We just love to know a lot of

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Speaker 2: people do. But like the things that make us stay

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Speaker 2: inside of a minute before it pushes us to another

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Speaker 2: minute are really a gift to our type are a

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Speaker 2: type personalities. Yeah, so this baby's making you do that, right,

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Speaker 2: It's just would be nice to not have to like yeah,

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Speaker 2: you know, but you know again, I know abid fight, right,

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Speaker 2: but I also know how fortunate I am to be

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Speaker 2: able to be pregnant and how people you know are

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Speaker 2: not are struggling and going. So it's like I also

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Speaker 2: see that side too, So I feel very fortunate. You

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Speaker 2: can hold both. Yeah, I can be grateful and have

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Speaker 2: a little grief, yeah and the yeah. So yeah, but

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Speaker 2: I mean, so far everything's great. It's just hopefully fibroid

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Speaker 2: gets it doesn't grow anymore. So if it stays the same,

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Speaker 2: I'll probably have pre term labor, is what she said. Okay,

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Speaker 2: so they would just but you'd see section anyway. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: but the thing is like, you want to catch it

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Speaker 2: before that promption. So okay, staying inside the minute, staying

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Speaker 2: inside the minute and stay and so I lets talk

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Speaker 2: to a supermodel today.

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Speaker 1: I walked in.

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Speaker 2: And I was like, I'm dressed like a gangster wrapper

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Speaker 2: because that's the portion of the program. I can't even

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Speaker 2: wear any tight fitting cute maternity col But I'm trying

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Speaker 2: to find was was she the one we talked about?

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Speaker 2: So it's Olivia Colpo's sister, But was this the one

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Speaker 2: that was married that hap yeah? Or is this was

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Speaker 2: she the one that gave the hall pass? But then wait,

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Speaker 2: oh it is her? Okay, great. Hannah's like, yes, I

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Speaker 2: wonder do you think it's something where we can talk

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Speaker 2: about that. I don't want to be like rude, but

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Speaker 2: it's also she put it out there. Yeah, I mean,

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Speaker 2: how many people ask you you put out there? I

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Speaker 2: know she know what podcast she's coming up. Listen, Aurora, listen.

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Speaker 2: But no, I'm excited to she's got any podcast coming out,

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Speaker 2: so that'll be I'm interested to hear all about it.

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Speaker 2: Let's take a break and get her on. I'm jan

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Speaker 2: I'm Kristen him. All right, girl, So I have to

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Speaker 2: start with and if it's okay, So we actually covered

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Speaker 2: something that was on y'all show because with this podcast,

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Speaker 2: you know, we've talked a lot about infidelity and marriages obviously,

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Speaker 2: like we talked about like my divorce and because he

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Speaker 2: had some affairs, and and then we talked about how

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Speaker 2: on your show you basically said you gave your now

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Speaker 2: ex husband right a hall pass, And so we discussed

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Speaker 2: it and I'm like, listen, like for me, I'm like,

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Speaker 2: I couldn't. I could never do it all pass. I

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Speaker 2: mean just because for me that trust is so important

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Speaker 2: in a relationship. And so when doing a little bit

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Speaker 2: of research now seeing that you are divorced, do you

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Speaker 2: think that trust peace was the kind of nail that

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Speaker 2: just killed it all? Welcome to wind Down? Yeah, sorry, welcome,

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Speaker 2: Welcome were jump right into it.

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Speaker 1: No, I was excited actually to be on your podcast

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Speaker 1: because I feel like you and I kind of have

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Speaker 1: that in common where it's like I really have no

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Speaker 1: shame in my game in terms of like I'm not

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Speaker 1: embarrassed to talk about the things that have happened that

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Speaker 1: I tried to work through that you know, some of

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Speaker 1: it didn't work, some of it did work, and hopefully,

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Speaker 1: if nothing else, like people can learn from it. So

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Speaker 1: it's interesting that you phrase it like that. It's a

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Speaker 1: trust thing because the whole reason why I gave him

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Speaker 1: that like hall paths, which we called it a one

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Speaker 1: a year. So when I met him, I had come

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Speaker 1: out of this relationship, well I thought it was a relationship.

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Speaker 1: It turns out I was like the side piece who

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Speaker 1: thought she was the girlfriend and this guy was an

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Speaker 1: MLB player and was basically having a girlfriend in a

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Speaker 1: different city. And I think when I came out of that,

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Speaker 1: I kind of had this. And to be quite honest,

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Speaker 1: I don't know if if if I don't know if

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Speaker 1: I still don't believe this, but I felt like men

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Speaker 1: are wired evolutionarily to want to spread their seed far

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Speaker 1: and wide, and so for them to be in a

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Speaker 1: monogamous relationship. I wasn't really sure if it's if it

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Speaker 1: was possible, and if it was possible, are they are

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Speaker 1: they happy? Are they living in their in their like

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Speaker 1: true self? So I felt like what we had was

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Speaker 1: so special and that if a man needs some kind

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Speaker 1: of sexual escapade, you know, or the freedom to feel

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Speaker 1: like he is allowed to do that, then that wouldn't

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Speaker 1: interfere with what we had because it's just sex. So

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Speaker 1: and for me, I felt like I didn't need that,

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Speaker 1: But if he did, who want to tell him not

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Speaker 1: to explore that as long as I'm the one who

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Speaker 1: he wants to be life partners with. So I said, okay,

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Speaker 1: you're allowed once a year to have sex with somebody else.

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Speaker 1: They don't roll over, You can't. It can't be anybody

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Speaker 1: we know. You can't keep in contact with them. You

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Speaker 1: have to use protection. If there's any kind of emotional feeling,

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Speaker 1: do you have to be upfront about it. And I

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Speaker 1: don't want to know about it because I had a

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Speaker 1: feeling that I, you know, I would have feelings about it.

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Speaker 1: And I thought that by giving him and he our

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Speaker 1: agreement was that well, what he had said to me

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Speaker 1: is like just having that freedom, knowing that, like if

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Speaker 1: I go on a trip or if I'm out, just

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Speaker 1: knowing that I have the freedom to possibly connect with

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Speaker 1: somebody else in this way, you know, I'm not going

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Speaker 1: to have to use it. And he didn't use it.

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Speaker 1: He didn't use it for like eight years, and they

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Speaker 1: ended up using it when I was pregnant with our

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Speaker 1: second child after COVID, when our relationship was already like

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Speaker 1: on the rocks for so many other reasons, and of

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Speaker 1: course somebody DMed me and they were like, just so

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Speaker 1: you know, like your husband slept with blah blah blah,

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Speaker 1: and they gave me the full rundown on like everything

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Speaker 1: they did. And I'm like, you know, when somebody describes

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Speaker 1: sex with your husband, like you know that that's I

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Speaker 1: knew it was true, and I confronted him about it

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Speaker 1: and he lied any gas lit me and he said,

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Speaker 1: you know, if you keep if you keep digging, if

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Speaker 1: you keep X, Y and Z, then like it's over.

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Speaker 1: And this we had already been in therapy at this point,

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Speaker 1: just for other reasons that we had grown apart, and

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Speaker 1: so people think that our divorce was because he, you know,

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Speaker 1: took advantage of this freedom that I gave him, but

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Speaker 1: actually it's not at all like the I didn't like

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Speaker 1: that he lied to me after, and of course he

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Speaker 1: said like, oh, well, you weren't supposed to know. He

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Speaker 1: told me not to tell you. You know, when somebody

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Speaker 1: wants you to be honest and they're asking for honesty

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Speaker 1: and you're not giving it, and then you're making kind

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Speaker 1: of an excuse that's very convenient for you to not

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Speaker 1: be honest that you know that, that definitely was did

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Speaker 1: not make me feel good. So when I ended up

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Speaker 1: finding out, and you know you always do, I was like,

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Speaker 1: I was like being serious, like a detective, and I

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Speaker 1: ended up putting out in some like encrypted message system.

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Speaker 1: I never looked through his phone our entire li relationship,

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Speaker 1: but I did this one time and I ended up

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Speaker 1: finding out about it, and he and so he admitted it,

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Speaker 1: and I said, okay, well, I thought i'd be okay

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Speaker 1: with it when I made the agreement with our relationship

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Speaker 1: was so strong. I don't know if I would have

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Speaker 1: been okay with it then, but like at this point

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Speaker 1: in time, I'm not okay with it anymore. And it

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Speaker 1: wasn't a freedom he was willing to give up, and

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Speaker 1: he mostly was upset that I had changed my mind

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Speaker 1: about everything, and then we ended up, and then we

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Speaker 1: went therapy for a year, and we ended up calling

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Speaker 1: it quits with our marriage, not because of the one year,

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Speaker 1: but basically just because of like I was no longer

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Speaker 1: the kind of person that would that, well, I no

390
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Speaker 1: longer yeah yeah, and he and he was upset that

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Speaker 1: I had changed my mind because honestly, he had been this.

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Speaker 1: He's the same person he was when I met him,

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Speaker 1: and I'm not so I really don't hold any resentment

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Speaker 1: towards him about that, and if anything, he's resembled towards

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Speaker 1: me for changing my mind, and then also now kind

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Speaker 1: of sharing our story in a way that I think

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Speaker 1: he was a little surprised that people didn't look kindly

398
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Speaker 1: on that. And people call it cheating, and he's like,

399
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Speaker 1: you told everybody I cheated on you, and I'm like,

400
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Speaker 1: I know, I actually never did. I sent me in

401
00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:25,920
Speaker 1: an agreement with you. You took advantage of it, and

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Speaker 1: I'm not okay with it anymore.

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Speaker 2: And it is interesting though, that like, you can change

404
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Speaker 2: your mind, but he is not allowed to change, like

405
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Speaker 2: he didn't use it for so long. So he also

406
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Speaker 2: changed his mind actually, and it's okay that it didn't

407
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Speaker 2: like it's very that's very gas lady.

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Speaker 1: Well, I also he said he started using it because, well,

409
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Speaker 1: you know, I had one baby breasted him for fifteen months.

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Speaker 1: He didn't sleep for the whole freaking year. I was

411
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Speaker 1: like up and down with my moods from my hormones,

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Speaker 1: and I had got pregnant with another baby was covid.

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Speaker 1: I was breastfeeding her and like he was like, well,

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Speaker 1: you're not giving me sex. You know, that's like always

415
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Speaker 1: the thing. You're not giving me enough sex. He's like,

416
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Speaker 1: and sorry, I was once a week, but it was

417
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Speaker 1: like the like it wasn't like passionate love sex. It

418
00:22:12,720 --> 00:22:15,840
Speaker 1: was like we got in this cycle of like me

419
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Speaker 1: feeling guilt tripped into having sex and it's just not

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Speaker 1: it wasn't working.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, well, I also want to affirm you too

422
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Speaker 2: and just say, like, I hope his gas lighting of

423
00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:30,960
Speaker 2: making you feel like it's your fault, that it's not

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Speaker 2: your fault. I hope you can like let that like

425
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Speaker 2: that you know that it's first of all, it's one

426
00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:40,800
Speaker 2: million percent okay that you're not comfortable with your husband

427
00:22:40,800 --> 00:22:44,880
Speaker 2: sleeping with somebody else and that you know you ended

428
00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:48,480
Speaker 2: up not wanting that in your marriage. That is one

429
00:22:48,640 --> 00:22:52,240
Speaker 2: million percent okay. So I hope his gas lighting of well,

430
00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:56,360
Speaker 2: you've changed you you you you you doesn't think in well,

431
00:22:56,400 --> 00:22:58,359
Speaker 2: if I would have only done this, like we would

432
00:22:58,359 --> 00:23:00,159
Speaker 2: be happy and I'd be married, and like, you know,

433
00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:02,520
Speaker 2: I hope you don't carry his gaslighting.

434
00:23:02,680 --> 00:23:06,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I feel okay about it. Like I take

435
00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:09,000
Speaker 1: full responsibility for my part in that. You know, I

436
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:11,240
Speaker 1: did give him the impression that this was something I

437
00:23:11,280 --> 00:23:13,760
Speaker 1: was going to be okay with, and I did. I

438
00:23:13,840 --> 00:23:16,120
Speaker 1: think I felt bad for a while about like changing

439
00:23:16,160 --> 00:23:18,720
Speaker 1: my mind. But now that we're you know, we're like

440
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:21,400
Speaker 1: almost two years into this divorce. That's like the never

441
00:23:21,480 --> 00:23:23,960
Speaker 1: ending divorce. I actually, on June ninth, I have to

442
00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:26,800
Speaker 1: move out of this house. Every day after I stay,

443
00:23:26,840 --> 00:23:28,720
Speaker 1: I owe him a thousand dollars or I like really

444
00:23:28,720 --> 00:23:31,159
Speaker 1: need to move out. Like after this, I'm gonna like

445
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:33,800
Speaker 1: start moving stuff into my storage unit. I'm like living

446
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:37,960
Speaker 1: in the most tellish limbo right now. But I feel

447
00:23:38,080 --> 00:23:41,320
Speaker 1: very good about I just know that we're I feel

448
00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:43,359
Speaker 1: I believe in soul contracts. I believe we've meant to

449
00:23:43,359 --> 00:23:47,000
Speaker 1: have our children together. He's a great father. I'm happy

450
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:49,320
Speaker 1: to do like this partnership with him. It would really

451
00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:51,480
Speaker 1: suck if I had to speak to somebody every day

452
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:53,800
Speaker 1: who I can't stand. I have a lot of love

453
00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:57,119
Speaker 1: for him, but I don't don't I don't want to

454
00:23:57,119 --> 00:23:59,919
Speaker 1: be in a partnership with him. He's just not my person.

455
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:01,240
Speaker 1: Nuts damn sure.

456
00:24:01,480 --> 00:24:05,679
Speaker 2: So next relationship, what do you want? And do you

457
00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:08,960
Speaker 2: still think that men have to have because I don't know.

458
00:24:09,040 --> 00:24:14,160
Speaker 2: Maybe I'm just like I mean, I've obviously been through

459
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:19,080
Speaker 2: the ringer with the x is, but I still believe,

460
00:24:19,160 --> 00:24:22,560
Speaker 2: like I believe my fiance when he says he's never

461
00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:24,239
Speaker 2: going to be with another I do. I believe him

462
00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:26,880
Speaker 2: he's never going to be inappropriate with another woman. And

463
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:30,080
Speaker 2: like I get people to say, there's a lot of

464
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:32,159
Speaker 2: people that have that same thing, like men are not

465
00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:34,439
Speaker 2: supposed to just be with one woman like that, you know,

466
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:39,240
Speaker 2: monogamy is not normal and whatever they say, But I

467
00:24:39,400 --> 00:24:41,399
Speaker 2: just I don't know, Like I know it's hard, I

468
00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:44,520
Speaker 2: know it's stale and stuff, but I still just think

469
00:24:44,600 --> 00:24:48,920
Speaker 2: like there's they're not that someone can be faithful.

470
00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:51,679
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, And I have a lot of respect for

471
00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:54,480
Speaker 1: you with your story and your and you're with your ex,

472
00:24:54,560 --> 00:24:58,080
Speaker 1: because I think it is a lot of there's this

473
00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:01,720
Speaker 1: there's kind of this CULTU now of just like oh

474
00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:04,119
Speaker 1: it's hard, let's move on, like let's give up. And

475
00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:09,200
Speaker 1: I do believe in trying, but I also believe in

476
00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:12,600
Speaker 1: really like listening to your gut and your body. And

477
00:25:12,640 --> 00:25:15,560
Speaker 1: sometimes I do think when we know it's time to

478
00:25:15,600 --> 00:25:18,520
Speaker 1: move on, we have a responsibility to do so. And

479
00:25:18,760 --> 00:25:20,920
Speaker 1: like I said, like I believe in soul contracts, and

480
00:25:20,960 --> 00:25:23,439
Speaker 1: I think sometimes those contracts can totally be for a

481
00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:26,959
Speaker 1: lifetime and sometimes not. And if you're with a partner

482
00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:31,440
Speaker 1: who is growing with you, and you guys are are

483
00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:34,359
Speaker 1: committed to checking in with each other and being on

484
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:36,320
Speaker 1: the same page and really trying to build a life

485
00:25:36,359 --> 00:25:40,520
Speaker 1: where you are mutually helping each other's evolution, then for

486
00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:43,560
Speaker 1: sure that can last a lifetime. It's not easy, and

487
00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:46,439
Speaker 1: I don't think that most people can do it well.

488
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:51,120
Speaker 1: But I have faith that you will because I feel

489
00:25:51,119 --> 00:25:53,160
Speaker 1: like you've done a lot of work and you've you know,

490
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:54,639
Speaker 1: you've been through the trials.

491
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:56,920
Speaker 2: Well, thank you. But for you, though, like what is

492
00:25:57,040 --> 00:25:59,800
Speaker 2: going to be like do you want to get married again?

493
00:25:59,840 --> 00:26:02,160
Speaker 2: Like do you what would you tell your new husband?

494
00:26:02,240 --> 00:26:04,280
Speaker 2: Like what what? What's your stance? Now?

495
00:26:05,119 --> 00:26:08,080
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I'm on hingin Ryah right now. Yes,

496
00:26:08,520 --> 00:26:13,240
Speaker 1: I started. Oh, it's like literally and.

497
00:26:13,359 --> 00:26:15,560
Speaker 2: What do you think about Rya because I feel like

498
00:26:15,600 --> 00:26:17,840
Speaker 2: it's just like model boy, model boy, model boy, and

499
00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:20,199
Speaker 2: they all like no, I mean the area is like

500
00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:22,679
Speaker 2: whatever I mean I met I didn't meet my fans

501
00:26:22,880 --> 00:26:25,520
Speaker 2: on Riya, but I mean like he lived in England

502
00:26:25,560 --> 00:26:27,640
Speaker 2: when I met him. But it was like all these

503
00:26:27,680 --> 00:26:30,639
Speaker 2: people on RYA are like not from anywhere close.

504
00:26:30,760 --> 00:26:33,080
Speaker 1: I feel like I know, they're like just they're like

505
00:26:33,119 --> 00:26:35,640
Speaker 1: I'll be in La for like twenty days, like want

506
00:26:35,680 --> 00:26:39,880
Speaker 1: to meet up for coffee. I'm like why, and then

507
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:43,080
Speaker 1: back to Brazil. I'm not having luck. I'm not gonna lie.

508
00:26:43,119 --> 00:26:45,560
Speaker 1: I started talking to one guy, funny enough, he was

509
00:26:45,760 --> 00:26:48,600
Speaker 1: from England too, and I ended up like finding out

510
00:26:48,600 --> 00:26:51,160
Speaker 1: that he lied about his age and by like three

511
00:26:51,320 --> 00:26:54,399
Speaker 1: years and my ex was fifteen years older than me.

512
00:26:54,520 --> 00:26:59,840
Speaker 1: Like I'm not afraid of an older person. So just

513
00:26:59,880 --> 00:27:02,200
Speaker 1: to start off with a lie, and to be able

514
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:05,919
Speaker 1: to lie so effortlessly and about something so trivial, like

515
00:27:06,160 --> 00:27:07,960
Speaker 1: I was like, okay, this is not a foundation I

516
00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:10,960
Speaker 1: need to start with The other guy started talking to me,

517
00:27:11,119 --> 00:27:13,960
Speaker 1: was like, yeah, I've been in polygamist relationships. I've been

518
00:27:14,000 --> 00:27:16,679
Speaker 1: in blah blah blah. And I told him about my situation.

519
00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:18,520
Speaker 1: She's like, it sounds like you were in a polygamoust

520
00:27:18,560 --> 00:27:26,360
Speaker 1: relationship too, and I'm like maybe I was, but like yeah,

521
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:29,000
Speaker 1: I mean I would love to get married again. I

522
00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:31,040
Speaker 1: would love to have like some kind of a blend

523
00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:34,840
Speaker 1: family that that's like a dream of mine. Right now,

524
00:27:34,920 --> 00:27:37,600
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm in such a I just know

525
00:27:37,680 --> 00:27:42,720
Speaker 1: that what I'm attracting is instability in another person, or

526
00:27:42,800 --> 00:27:45,639
Speaker 1: like I'm seeking a person to try to make my

527
00:27:45,720 --> 00:27:48,439
Speaker 1: life more stable because it has been just so okay.

528
00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:53,040
Speaker 1: We've been nesting in one house, like he's been at

529
00:27:53,080 --> 00:27:56,119
Speaker 1: our other house in Palm Springs while I'm here so

530
00:27:56,160 --> 00:27:58,000
Speaker 1: that we don't have to uproove with the kids. And

531
00:27:58,040 --> 00:28:01,040
Speaker 1: now I'm gonna be renting when I keep like losing

532
00:28:01,080 --> 00:28:03,920
Speaker 1: the It's like if my life is just very chaotic

533
00:28:03,960 --> 00:28:07,840
Speaker 1: where I just don't see me attracting anything functional at

534
00:28:07,840 --> 00:28:10,040
Speaker 1: the moment, I would love to get to a place

535
00:28:10,080 --> 00:28:13,560
Speaker 1: where I feel so grounded in myself and like just

536
00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:15,840
Speaker 1: really like in love with myself and so I can

537
00:28:15,880 --> 00:28:18,480
Speaker 1: attract I just know that I'm not going to attract

538
00:28:18,640 --> 00:28:23,040
Speaker 1: that until I get there myself. So do I want

539
00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:25,000
Speaker 1: it to happen Dune, Yes, I'm going to have to

540
00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:28,160
Speaker 1: make some serious changes because I don't know. The wine

541
00:28:28,160 --> 00:28:29,600
Speaker 1: every night is not doing it for me.

542
00:28:30,040 --> 00:28:32,560
Speaker 2: But there's a season, Like, don't be hard on yourself either,

543
00:28:32,640 --> 00:28:35,560
Speaker 2: because there is a season, and space matters, like you're

544
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:37,400
Speaker 2: not even you don't even have your own home home

545
00:28:37,480 --> 00:28:40,480
Speaker 2: right now, All of that matters. You can't settle a

546
00:28:40,520 --> 00:28:42,120
Speaker 2: soul when you can't even you know, you have to

547
00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:45,000
Speaker 2: settle inside some walls too. Yeah, And I think for

548
00:28:45,040 --> 00:28:47,280
Speaker 2: sure the awareness that you have too is great because

549
00:28:47,280 --> 00:28:49,840
Speaker 2: I remember when I got divorced, I just thought it

550
00:28:49,920 --> 00:28:52,760
Speaker 2: was like his issues and like not mine. So I

551
00:28:52,840 --> 00:28:55,520
Speaker 2: just was like straight into a relationship and like the

552
00:28:55,560 --> 00:28:58,239
Speaker 2: first person that like told me, I was pretty like

553
00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:01,320
Speaker 2: fell you know, fell into and then you realize, like

554
00:29:01,600 --> 00:29:04,680
Speaker 2: there is work to do. But also like I always

555
00:29:04,760 --> 00:29:07,480
Speaker 2: equated happiness like in a relationship. So if I was

556
00:29:07,520 --> 00:29:09,520
Speaker 2: in a relationship, that means I'm happy. If I wasn't,

557
00:29:09,680 --> 00:29:12,000
Speaker 2: then if I wasn't a relationship, that means that I'm

558
00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:15,040
Speaker 2: you know, not lovable or I wasn't happy, so like

559
00:29:15,760 --> 00:29:18,040
Speaker 2: I had to get to a place where I loved myself,

560
00:29:18,080 --> 00:29:20,240
Speaker 2: happy with myself, and then that's when it found. But

561
00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:22,320
Speaker 2: it took, you know a little over a year to

562
00:29:22,480 --> 00:29:26,240
Speaker 2: I love myself and like you know, and that's sitting

563
00:29:26,240 --> 00:29:31,040
Speaker 2: with yourself and doing some hard work, you know. But

564
00:29:31,720 --> 00:29:35,520
Speaker 2: I mean you'll you will find like that person that

565
00:29:35,560 --> 00:29:38,200
Speaker 2: will love you and that will not I know it's

566
00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:40,400
Speaker 2: out there because I've found it. I know I did.

567
00:29:40,440 --> 00:29:45,080
Speaker 1: Sweet whenever, like you find something that really works and

568
00:29:45,120 --> 00:29:47,080
Speaker 1: you just like want to convince the other person. It's

569
00:29:47,120 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 1: like I promise it's it's there. It's there. It's like

570
00:29:49,240 --> 00:29:52,040
Speaker 1: you can you can you can lead a horse to water,

571
00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:53,720
Speaker 1: but you can't make it drink. Like I feel like, yeah,

572
00:29:53,760 --> 00:29:56,640
Speaker 1: we all need to like get there when when we're ready,

573
00:29:56,760 --> 00:29:58,800
Speaker 1: and and I do. I don't know if you found

574
00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:01,600
Speaker 1: it a little different, but like since I do have

575
00:30:01,640 --> 00:30:03,560
Speaker 1: two kids, I have a two and a four year old,

576
00:30:05,480 --> 00:30:08,280
Speaker 1: I'm not like I remember my old self always being

577
00:30:08,280 --> 00:30:10,520
Speaker 1: like I need the guy. I want to have the kids.

578
00:30:10,520 --> 00:30:13,760
Speaker 1: I want to have the white picket fence. Like I

579
00:30:13,880 --> 00:30:16,120
Speaker 1: kind of been there, done that, and like I have

580
00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:19,000
Speaker 1: my kids. I always wanted to be a mother. I'm

581
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:21,600
Speaker 1: so happy to be a mother. But I don't really

582
00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:24,800
Speaker 1: feel that timeline pressure anymore of like finding somebody to

583
00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:27,760
Speaker 1: be the guy to have the perfect life with. So

584
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:32,080
Speaker 1: it's almost like, I don't I feel kind of content

585
00:30:32,240 --> 00:30:36,680
Speaker 1: in just if you're not, if you're not making my

586
00:30:36,840 --> 00:30:40,240
Speaker 1: life more magical in some way, then then I'm really

587
00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:41,160
Speaker 1: I'm not going to force it.

588
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:43,520
Speaker 2: Well, it's a thing like one thousand percent. I was

589
00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:44,920
Speaker 2: the same way. I'm like, I have two kids, I

590
00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:48,840
Speaker 2: don't need any more kids. And it was not because

591
00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:50,800
Speaker 2: I'm like, why would I settle to be in something

592
00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:53,680
Speaker 2: I don't want to be. I will not be miserable

593
00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:55,600
Speaker 2: again in relationships and like why would I settle? Like

594
00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:57,560
Speaker 2: I got me and my kids, like I'm good, I

595
00:30:57,600 --> 00:31:00,840
Speaker 2: got my friends like happy. So yeah, if the settling

596
00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:03,240
Speaker 2: aspect is like I was, like, I will never go

597
00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:05,560
Speaker 2: back to that because I don't have that like ticking

598
00:31:06,320 --> 00:31:07,720
Speaker 2: right time I'm like, oh my god, I need to

599
00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:08,720
Speaker 2: have kids or you know.

600
00:31:09,240 --> 00:31:10,960
Speaker 1: And you know what I feel. It makes me feel

601
00:31:11,040 --> 00:31:17,240
Speaker 1: so so sad because I'm like I'm able to afford

602
00:31:17,520 --> 00:31:21,080
Speaker 1: a single life and a lot of women just aren't

603
00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:23,800
Speaker 1: like they like, especially if they have kids and if

604
00:31:23,800 --> 00:31:27,080
Speaker 1: their ex like doesn't make any money to pay child

605
00:31:27,120 --> 00:31:29,479
Speaker 1: support and they're not making enough on their own. Like

606
00:31:29,720 --> 00:31:32,120
Speaker 1: I'm looking for rentals right now, like within a ten

607
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:35,000
Speaker 1: mile radius of where my ex lives, like court ordered,

608
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:37,840
Speaker 1: and it is so expensive to live here. I live

609
00:31:37,880 --> 00:31:40,880
Speaker 1: in LA I mean, I don't know how anybody who

610
00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:44,760
Speaker 1: isn't making good money can afford to not be in

611
00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:47,880
Speaker 1: a partnership like they would. Probably that's probably like half

612
00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:50,720
Speaker 1: the reason why these women are staying with men that

613
00:31:50,760 --> 00:31:54,360
Speaker 1: they don't love, because they can't live without that half

614
00:31:54,400 --> 00:31:54,920
Speaker 1: the income.

615
00:31:55,360 --> 00:31:58,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's that's so true. I remember, like, you know,

616
00:31:59,360 --> 00:32:01,959
Speaker 2: I'll dm with a few girls that have you know,

617
00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:05,080
Speaker 2: reached out, and that's like the number one thing they say.

618
00:32:05,120 --> 00:32:07,400
Speaker 2: They're like, I don't have like the resources or the

619
00:32:07,400 --> 00:32:09,480
Speaker 2: money to get out, And I'm just like, oh, like that,

620
00:32:09,560 --> 00:32:11,400
Speaker 2: Like it breaks my heart for them, because I never

621
00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:14,040
Speaker 2: want anyone to like be in a situation where they

622
00:32:14,480 --> 00:32:17,040
Speaker 2: they feel stuck and trapped and they can't get out

623
00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:20,040
Speaker 2: because they can't afford it or And that's just like

624
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:23,080
Speaker 2: I was trying to do something like with Krista and

625
00:32:23,120 --> 00:32:25,520
Speaker 2: we actually just talked about the other day, like something

626
00:32:25,600 --> 00:32:29,120
Speaker 2: some kind of like single moms like charity where it's

627
00:32:29,160 --> 00:32:31,280
Speaker 2: like we can help like a mom, like here's rental

628
00:32:31,520 --> 00:32:34,760
Speaker 2: rent for so many months or whatever the anpony is, Like.

629
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:37,840
Speaker 1: It is a really good idea actually, Like they say

630
00:32:37,840 --> 00:32:41,120
Speaker 1: in I think it's like the Scandinavian countries. There it's

631
00:32:41,240 --> 00:32:44,120
Speaker 1: very common for them to live in communes and they

632
00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:48,440
Speaker 1: actually report like happier lifestyles. And we had something like that,

633
00:32:48,640 --> 00:32:50,600
Speaker 1: like it's just like, you know, have a bunch of

634
00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:53,000
Speaker 1: rich people donate and then buy some kind of a

635
00:32:53,040 --> 00:32:56,200
Speaker 1: commune and it's like a place for moms and kids

636
00:32:56,280 --> 00:32:58,760
Speaker 1: to go and live to when they're like in a

637
00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:02,680
Speaker 1: transitional period and they afford, you know, to live on

638
00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:04,760
Speaker 1: their own, but they're there, and I mean some of

639
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:06,920
Speaker 1: these situations are abusive, you know. It's not just like

640
00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:10,400
Speaker 1: oh I'm not happy in my marriage, which I feel

641
00:33:10,400 --> 00:33:12,200
Speaker 1: like is reason enough to not stick around.

642
00:33:23,720 --> 00:33:26,160
Speaker 3: Hey, guys, throws in Scaniz and I'm Eric Winter and

643
00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:29,920
Speaker 3: together we host that, he said Aadijo podcast. Yes, after

644
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:33,600
Speaker 3: eighteen years together fifteen married, we still disagree about a

645
00:33:33,680 --> 00:33:36,120
Speaker 3: lot of things, but we do it with much more

646
00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:39,440
Speaker 3: right Eric, Yes, dear, whatever you say. I mean, sometimes

647
00:33:39,440 --> 00:33:41,040
Speaker 3: we're gonna be a dream pupper.

648
00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:42,120
Speaker 2: Okay, here we go again.

649
00:33:42,320 --> 00:33:43,920
Speaker 3: But I love the way we can be open and

650
00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:46,320
Speaker 3: honest with each other. Yeah, maybe a little too much,

651
00:33:46,360 --> 00:33:48,960
Speaker 3: but that's what people like, a real couple going through

652
00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:54,640
Speaker 3: real things. Well, when we're not disagreeing slash arguing, we

653
00:33:54,760 --> 00:33:58,840
Speaker 3: definitely chat with some fascinating people actors, musicians, life coaches,

654
00:33:59,000 --> 00:34:01,640
Speaker 3: marriage experts. We definitely need those.

655
00:34:01,840 --> 00:34:02,400
Speaker 2: Oh God.

656
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:06,680
Speaker 3: Anyways, we love our listeners and they've been so supportive

657
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:09,440
Speaker 3: through the years, so we must be doing something completely right.

658
00:34:10,320 --> 00:34:12,520
Speaker 3: More listen to he said a yadio as a part

659
00:34:12,520 --> 00:34:15,680
Speaker 3: of my coael Tura Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple

660
00:34:15,719 --> 00:34:17,960
Speaker 3: podcasts or whatever. You listen to podcasts.

661
00:34:22,239 --> 00:34:25,279
Speaker 2: So you have a podcast now, I do, Yeah, I

662
00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:26,440
Speaker 2: tell us everything about it.

663
00:34:26,520 --> 00:34:29,000
Speaker 1: One of my good friends. Yeah, it's called Barely Filter.

664
00:34:29,760 --> 00:34:33,560
Speaker 1: It's with my good friend Kristin, and she she looks

665
00:34:33,640 --> 00:34:34,600
Speaker 1: kind of like that, Kristin.

666
00:34:35,600 --> 00:34:38,520
Speaker 2: I mean we're copy paste. Yeah, she just had a baby.

667
00:34:38,520 --> 00:34:40,480
Speaker 2: I'm getting ready to have a baby on this episode.

668
00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:43,040
Speaker 1: I didn't want to ask because you never asked that question.

669
00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:45,560
Speaker 1: But I'm like, she looks round in these.

670
00:34:46,400 --> 00:34:48,920
Speaker 2: Macrol This is the most round one can look in

671
00:34:48,920 --> 00:34:51,520
Speaker 2: the sense like we're literally thirty nine weeks.

672
00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:54,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, and having a boy or girl.

673
00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:55,279
Speaker 2: We don't know.

674
00:34:55,560 --> 00:34:57,759
Speaker 1: We're not find She didn't know either, And do you

675
00:34:57,760 --> 00:34:58,759
Speaker 1: have other kids? Yeah?

676
00:34:58,760 --> 00:35:00,200
Speaker 2: I have a boy and a girl. So this is

677
00:35:00,239 --> 00:35:00,760
Speaker 2: the type breaker.

678
00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:03,200
Speaker 1: Okay, she had two boys and she didn't. I think

679
00:35:03,239 --> 00:35:04,719
Speaker 1: they didn't want to find out because it's to be

680
00:35:04,760 --> 00:35:07,520
Speaker 1: so disappointed if they had another boy and it ended

681
00:35:07,600 --> 00:35:08,320
Speaker 1: up being a girl.

682
00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:11,880
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, Statistically, that's like not like normal, Like right,

683
00:35:11,960 --> 00:35:14,120
Speaker 2: isn't it hired to have, Like like Nicole's kid is

684
00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:16,200
Speaker 2: like a third boy? Isn't that usually how it works?

685
00:35:16,880 --> 00:35:18,640
Speaker 1: I don't know. I know families with five girls. I

686
00:35:18,680 --> 00:35:19,840
Speaker 1: know families with five boys.

687
00:35:19,880 --> 00:35:20,120
Speaker 2: Wow.

688
00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:22,120
Speaker 1: I feel like I lucked out with one beach.

689
00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:25,880
Speaker 2: But okay, so your podcast is with her barely filtered.

690
00:35:26,760 --> 00:35:29,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, and and we talk about we talk about pretty

691
00:35:29,239 --> 00:35:32,719
Speaker 1: much everything. It's everything's very unfiltered. Talk a lot about

692
00:35:32,760 --> 00:35:36,239
Speaker 1: relationship stuff. She's happily married. She's kind of like one

693
00:35:36,239 --> 00:35:38,560
Speaker 1: of those She's in one of those marriages where you

694
00:35:38,560 --> 00:35:41,360
Speaker 1: just want to like geg because they're so like she

695
00:35:41,520 --> 00:35:44,400
Speaker 1: like meet dangles him all over the internet, he's super hot,

696
00:35:44,480 --> 00:35:47,760
Speaker 1: and we joke because she's like, she's like his six

697
00:35:47,840 --> 00:35:50,560
Speaker 1: packs rubbing up against my pregnant belly, and I'm like,

698
00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:52,000
Speaker 1: I don't think I've ever slept with a guy with

699
00:35:52,040 --> 00:35:53,879
Speaker 1: a six pack, Like I need to be the hotter one.

700
00:35:53,920 --> 00:35:56,200
Speaker 1: I don't want to. I don't want anybody who's like

701
00:35:56,320 --> 00:35:58,200
Speaker 1: making me feel like I need to go to the gym.

702
00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:01,200
Speaker 1: But anyway, we talk about every thing. We talk about health.

703
00:36:01,960 --> 00:36:04,200
Speaker 1: We have a lot of guests on who are specialists

704
00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:10,919
Speaker 1: around like fertility moones, like diet stuff, glucose, a lot

705
00:36:10,920 --> 00:36:13,640
Speaker 1: of kind of like spirituality aspects. We have some people

706
00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:18,880
Speaker 1: who went through big traumas and talk about dealing with grief. Uh.

707
00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:22,280
Speaker 1: Sometimes it's funny, sometimes it's sad. We laugh, we cry.

708
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:24,560
Speaker 2: We were crying right before you came on.

709
00:36:25,320 --> 00:36:28,840
Speaker 1: Literally really yeah, yeah, you never know. You have to

710
00:36:28,840 --> 00:36:31,840
Speaker 1: wear your water to proof mascara to recordings just in case.

711
00:36:32,480 --> 00:36:36,520
Speaker 2: I love that. I love the title too, because I

712
00:36:36,560 --> 00:36:40,680
Speaker 2: love that you're open. But I'm curious, are you How

713
00:36:40,719 --> 00:36:43,520
Speaker 2: are you with the headlines of things and comments and

714
00:36:43,600 --> 00:36:47,879
Speaker 2: people because you have a public family. You're like one

715
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:49,560
Speaker 2: of five siblings.

716
00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:54,200
Speaker 1: Right, yeah, yeah, I mean I feel like I've dealt

717
00:36:54,239 --> 00:36:57,319
Speaker 1: with it naturally. I've dealt with it a little better

718
00:36:57,360 --> 00:36:59,319
Speaker 1: than some of my sisters have, just in terms of

719
00:36:59,640 --> 00:37:03,000
Speaker 1: different backlash of things that go on in our lives.

720
00:37:04,320 --> 00:37:07,479
Speaker 1: I honestly, I think I probably just engaged too much.

721
00:37:07,560 --> 00:37:10,200
Speaker 1: Like I'm that person who's like fighting with Joshmo and

722
00:37:10,280 --> 00:37:15,759
Speaker 1: Minnesota because like that, and especially when when there was

723
00:37:15,800 --> 00:37:18,080
Speaker 1: a lot of like hot politic topics, I feel like

724
00:37:18,120 --> 00:37:19,560
Speaker 1: I was always kind of on the verge of being

725
00:37:19,600 --> 00:37:23,560
Speaker 1: canceled because like, I'm pretty open about my beliefs about things,

726
00:37:24,880 --> 00:37:27,319
Speaker 1: and they don't always align with a lot of like

727
00:37:27,400 --> 00:37:29,680
Speaker 1: the the culture in.

728
00:37:29,760 --> 00:37:33,560
Speaker 2: LA Like give us one, what's what's an example of that?

729
00:37:33,680 --> 00:37:34,920
Speaker 2: Because I want to get into it.

730
00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:37,080
Speaker 1: Well, the most recent thing that I got that I

731
00:37:37,360 --> 00:37:41,319
Speaker 1: that turned into a huge thing was I I don't

732
00:37:41,320 --> 00:37:46,839
Speaker 1: believe it is ethically or morally sound to to give

733
00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:49,720
Speaker 1: a child any kind of drug that's going to change

734
00:37:49,719 --> 00:37:53,000
Speaker 1: their body or when they're young. Like I'm all towards

735
00:37:53,080 --> 00:37:55,160
Speaker 1: I'm all about like transitioning as an adult, but I

736
00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:57,719
Speaker 1: actually think it's criminal that parents are are giving their

737
00:37:57,800 --> 00:38:00,920
Speaker 1: kids things that are helping them transit when their brains

738
00:38:00,920 --> 00:38:04,600
Speaker 1: aren't even fully developed and people kind of I think

739
00:38:04,600 --> 00:38:07,600
Speaker 1: people a lot of times are like they're hearing what

740
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:11,080
Speaker 1: they want to hear, and they're hearing me basically say, oh,

741
00:38:11,360 --> 00:38:15,520
Speaker 1: she's anti trans and she's not supporting people who want

742
00:38:15,560 --> 00:38:18,920
Speaker 1: to change their gender or their sexuality, which is not

743
00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:22,120
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. But like, I'm entitled to my opinion,

744
00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:25,680
Speaker 1: especially with regard to children, and also just like having

745
00:38:25,719 --> 00:38:28,000
Speaker 1: the kids wear masks and schools. I was very much

746
00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:30,799
Speaker 1: against that, and that was people did not like that.

747
00:38:31,880 --> 00:38:33,319
Speaker 2: Yeah, I have my I.

748
00:38:33,239 --> 00:38:36,239
Speaker 1: Have my views on birth control. I would think birth

749
00:38:36,239 --> 00:38:39,399
Speaker 1: control is fine. I think I think and Kristen's very

750
00:38:39,400 --> 00:38:44,800
Speaker 1: anti birth control. Like our our views are very different

751
00:38:45,440 --> 00:38:49,120
Speaker 1: in most things. Actually, like she's pretty extreme and I'm

752
00:38:49,160 --> 00:38:50,439
Speaker 1: a little bit more middle of the road.

753
00:38:50,520 --> 00:38:54,799
Speaker 2: But wait, what's review on birth control? In what's hers?

754
00:38:54,600 --> 00:38:57,680
Speaker 1: She's very anti birth control, she thinks, and we actually

755
00:38:57,680 --> 00:38:58,960
Speaker 1: have a guest coming on too, and who's going to

756
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:01,400
Speaker 1: talk more about birth and and basically she says that

757
00:39:01,440 --> 00:39:07,040
Speaker 1: it's like it changes women more than we know, and

758
00:39:07,080 --> 00:39:10,520
Speaker 1: that it's just really bad for you, that it messes

759
00:39:10,560 --> 00:39:15,200
Speaker 1: with your like potential fertility and and your brain.

760
00:39:15,440 --> 00:39:19,720
Speaker 2: Were you on it? Were you on birth control, No, ma'am,

761
00:39:21,280 --> 00:39:24,120
Speaker 2: so I never. I never took birth control either, even

762
00:39:24,120 --> 00:39:27,680
Speaker 2: though I have, oh you have, Oh yes, I was

763
00:39:27,760 --> 00:39:30,400
Speaker 2: never on birth control. Oh I was on birth control.

764
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:31,080
Speaker 2: I was just like a.

765
00:39:31,480 --> 00:39:35,440
Speaker 1: Big fan of it, Like it made my skin clear. Crazy.

766
00:39:35,480 --> 00:39:36,760
Speaker 2: So the pill made me crazy.

767
00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:37,440
Speaker 1: I U D.

768
00:39:37,840 --> 00:39:39,759
Speaker 2: I did do IUD for a while. Yeah, it made

769
00:39:39,760 --> 00:39:42,279
Speaker 2: me nuts. In between, I'm not saying don't go on

770
00:39:42,440 --> 00:39:44,880
Speaker 2: you know people out there, but I'm just yeah, it

771
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:48,520
Speaker 2: made me nuts. Yeah, I went crazy, and we don't

772
00:39:48,520 --> 00:39:50,799
Speaker 2: need to be any more crazy, so no, I.

773
00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:52,520
Speaker 1: Know, Yeah, for me, I think it actually made me

774
00:39:52,680 --> 00:39:55,000
Speaker 1: less crazy. I don't know if it had any long

775
00:39:55,120 --> 00:39:57,719
Speaker 1: term effects, like maybe I'd be a better version of

776
00:39:57,760 --> 00:39:59,640
Speaker 1: myself now had I never been on it. But my

777
00:39:59,719 --> 00:40:03,200
Speaker 1: thing is like she also like muckerdoses mushrooms and she

778
00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:05,360
Speaker 1: smokes weed, and I'm like, okay, how are you okay

779
00:40:05,360 --> 00:40:07,840
Speaker 1: with that stuff? Because it's like, you know, it's like

780
00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:11,040
Speaker 1: fringe medicine, but you're not okay with like like sometimes

781
00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:13,160
Speaker 1: I'm just like you're just you're just picking a side

782
00:40:13,160 --> 00:40:15,200
Speaker 1: to pick a side, like you just want to be contrary.

783
00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:17,520
Speaker 2: But I think that's like America right now though, like

784
00:40:17,560 --> 00:40:19,719
Speaker 2: everyone just like picks aside and digs their heels in.

785
00:40:19,840 --> 00:40:22,520
Speaker 2: I'm like, it doesn't even have to be this polarizing.

786
00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:24,799
Speaker 2: We could just actually listen to each other and like

787
00:40:24,840 --> 00:40:26,480
Speaker 2: hear what we have to say, and that would be

788
00:40:26,520 --> 00:40:29,560
Speaker 2: okay too. Remember those days when we used to all

789
00:40:29,600 --> 00:40:31,239
Speaker 2: do that? Yeah?

790
00:40:31,320 --> 00:40:32,120
Speaker 1: What was it? I said?

791
00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:33,719
Speaker 2: Do you remember the days when we all used to do that,

792
00:40:33,800 --> 00:40:36,000
Speaker 2: like actually hear each other and have a conversation instead

793
00:40:36,000 --> 00:40:37,600
Speaker 2: of it being like like listen.

794
00:40:37,400 --> 00:40:40,800
Speaker 1: With the intent to understand, not to respond, and also

795
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:45,320
Speaker 1: like not just yes, I totally I'm one thousand percent

796
00:40:45,640 --> 00:40:47,920
Speaker 1: This girl, Africa Brooks. I don't know if you've heard

797
00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:51,160
Speaker 1: of her, but that's her whole shick that like everybody

798
00:40:51,239 --> 00:40:56,920
Speaker 1: is afraid to speak or to be curious about something

799
00:40:57,000 --> 00:40:59,719
Speaker 1: without with the fear of offending somebody. Like I was

800
00:40:59,760 --> 00:41:02,520
Speaker 1: just on a trip and there were two there were

801
00:41:02,920 --> 00:41:05,920
Speaker 1: a couple, two dads and they have three kids, and

802
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:07,840
Speaker 1: I was like, I was like, Okay, this is probably

803
00:41:07,840 --> 00:41:09,880
Speaker 1: the stupidest question, and I hope it's not not offensive,

804
00:41:09,880 --> 00:41:12,080
Speaker 1: but I'm just so curious. I'm like, how do you

805
00:41:12,160 --> 00:41:16,399
Speaker 1: know what which kid the dad's calling? Like if they

806
00:41:16,400 --> 00:41:18,319
Speaker 1: call you both dad and they're like, there are no

807
00:41:18,440 --> 00:41:21,400
Speaker 1: stupid questions, and I applaud you for for like asking me.

808
00:41:21,440 --> 00:41:23,880
Speaker 1: I feel like people sometimes just like don't say anything,

809
00:41:23,920 --> 00:41:26,600
Speaker 1: which is more awkward. It's like we should feel free

810
00:41:26,719 --> 00:41:29,279
Speaker 1: to ask our silly questions because we haven't all had

811
00:41:29,320 --> 00:41:30,320
Speaker 1: the same life experience.

812
00:41:30,440 --> 00:41:32,040
Speaker 2: Right, what did they say? Because now I'm curious.

813
00:41:32,239 --> 00:41:34,920
Speaker 1: He said ones called daddy and one's called dad, but

814
00:41:35,000 --> 00:41:37,560
Speaker 1: sometimes they call them both dad. But that they could

815
00:41:37,560 --> 00:41:40,399
Speaker 1: tell just by like the tone of the voice. Ah, right,

816
00:41:40,719 --> 00:41:41,600
Speaker 1: which makes sense.

817
00:41:41,719 --> 00:41:45,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, No, I mean I personally, and I even tell

818
00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:48,440
Speaker 2: the girls because we haven't usually another host with us, Catherine,

819
00:41:48,840 --> 00:41:52,319
Speaker 2: and she's our opposer. Usually. Well that's I'm like, don't

820
00:41:52,320 --> 00:41:53,920
Speaker 2: agree with me because I'm like I don't want to

821
00:41:53,920 --> 00:41:56,439
Speaker 2: listen to something where everyone's like yeah I agree, Like yeah,

822
00:41:57,160 --> 00:41:59,120
Speaker 2: let's you know, I'm like, have a debate with me,

823
00:41:59,239 --> 00:42:02,200
Speaker 2: like I you know, we have very different opinions, so

824
00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:05,200
Speaker 2: let's like, let's voice that I think in this day

825
00:42:05,239 --> 00:42:08,319
Speaker 2: and age, like you're saying, it's people. Don't people just

826
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:09,759
Speaker 2: want to go straight to like, oh, you must be

827
00:42:09,800 --> 00:42:12,040
Speaker 2: anti this, Like no, I'm not. I'm just these are

828
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:13,920
Speaker 2: just my views. You don't have to agree with me,

829
00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:16,280
Speaker 2: and you also don't have to be mean and hateful

830
00:42:16,280 --> 00:42:19,319
Speaker 2: towards it too. We're all afraid of being canceled too.

831
00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:22,200
Speaker 2: Like I'm afraid of getting two people canceled because I

832
00:42:22,239 --> 00:42:24,319
Speaker 2: have this is my best friend and my husband's in

833
00:42:24,320 --> 00:42:26,879
Speaker 2: country music. So I'm like, I have to be extra care,

834
00:42:27,160 --> 00:42:29,920
Speaker 2: I know, because I could get both of them canceled fast.

835
00:42:30,440 --> 00:42:33,200
Speaker 1: I know. That's like my sister. My sister's like like

836
00:42:33,280 --> 00:42:36,880
Speaker 1: my mom has very she has very strong views, and

837
00:42:36,880 --> 00:42:38,120
Speaker 1: she's one of those people who just like put it

838
00:42:38,160 --> 00:42:40,960
Speaker 1: all on Facebook, and my sister like made her delete

839
00:42:40,960 --> 00:42:43,360
Speaker 1: all of it because it's like what we say is

840
00:42:43,400 --> 00:42:46,440
Speaker 1: a reflection of each other in a lot of ways.

841
00:42:46,520 --> 00:42:49,239
Speaker 1: And so sometimes my sisters will text me and be like,

842
00:42:49,239 --> 00:42:51,319
Speaker 1: we take your story down right now, like we're not

843
00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:52,080
Speaker 1: going the.

844
00:42:52,080 --> 00:42:55,319
Speaker 2: Wild card I to do.

845
00:42:55,520 --> 00:42:57,799
Speaker 1: I love you, Thank you guys.

846
00:42:57,640 --> 00:43:00,200
Speaker 2: Well, thank you for coming on Wine Down. I love you.

847
00:43:00,440 --> 00:43:02,239
Speaker 2: I'm so glad that we were able to connect. And

848
00:43:03,239 --> 00:43:06,399
Speaker 2: We're going to listen to your podcast and yeah when

849
00:43:06,400 --> 00:43:07,920
Speaker 2: I'm in La this week.

850
00:43:08,160 --> 00:43:09,719
Speaker 1: Let's oh you're coming this week?

851
00:43:09,800 --> 00:43:10,719
Speaker 2: Yeah for a week.

852
00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:15,000
Speaker 1: Oh amazing. If you have to have three like forty

853
00:43:15,000 --> 00:43:17,600
Speaker 1: five minutes and you're in West Hollywood, please stop by,

854
00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:19,719
Speaker 1: dear media, because we would love to have you on.

855
00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:22,120
Speaker 2: It would be so fun. Yeah, that'd be so fun.

856
00:43:22,120 --> 00:43:22,600
Speaker 1: I would love to.

857
00:43:22,560 --> 00:43:24,200
Speaker 2: Help her pack a box because she's got to get

858
00:43:24,200 --> 00:43:24,680
Speaker 2: out quick.

859
00:43:24,760 --> 00:43:25,040
Speaker 1: I know.

860
00:43:25,280 --> 00:43:26,840
Speaker 2: We got to get you out, girl, We've got to

861
00:43:26,880 --> 00:43:28,120
Speaker 2: get you out of your place.

862
00:43:27,960 --> 00:43:30,000
Speaker 1: I know. Yeah. Then we'll go on like speed dating

863
00:43:30,080 --> 00:43:33,080
Speaker 1: or something fun. Oh yeah, I'll swipe have any friends.

864
00:43:33,640 --> 00:43:37,200
Speaker 2: He's got a brother and he's got uh they're all married.

865
00:43:37,239 --> 00:43:41,160
Speaker 2: I think the ones in English married. He's not married.

866
00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:45,799
Speaker 2: He's got an older son. He's Scottish. Okay, the accents enough.

867
00:43:46,160 --> 00:43:49,640
Speaker 2: I gotta tell you, the accents really get our little

868
00:43:49,719 --> 00:43:51,480
Speaker 2: American hearts. They knock them out.

869
00:43:51,520 --> 00:43:56,520
Speaker 1: Best is your is your husband Scottish shoe or English

870
00:43:56,600 --> 00:43:56,960
Speaker 1: or something?

871
00:43:57,400 --> 00:44:00,839
Speaker 2: No, mine's just super Southern. Oh yeah, Southern accents. How

872
00:44:00,840 --> 00:44:02,080
Speaker 2: I get myself in this position?

873
00:44:02,280 --> 00:44:04,839
Speaker 1: So, oh my god. Yeah, maybe that's what I need.

874
00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:07,120
Speaker 1: I just needed an accent. My ACX was from Boston

875
00:44:07,160 --> 00:44:09,239
Speaker 1: and that accents, that's not it.

876
00:44:09,280 --> 00:44:11,440
Speaker 2: Speaking of birth control, that'll do it for me. And

877
00:44:11,480 --> 00:44:14,560
Speaker 2: I hate to be offensive. That's a birth control for me.

878
00:44:15,239 --> 00:44:17,680
Speaker 2: All right, girl, Well, we will chat with you soon.

879
00:44:17,800 --> 00:44:18,520
Speaker 2: Thanks for coming on.

880
00:44:19,040 --> 00:44:20,200
Speaker 1: Okay, thanks so much guys.

881
00:44:22,239 --> 00:44:28,760
Speaker 2: Ye what a fun a. I love Wildcard Aurora. She's fun.

882
00:44:29,160 --> 00:44:31,759
Speaker 2: I just like how like, I don't know, there's just

883
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:33,960
Speaker 2: something really free. But it's not a challenge. I was

884
00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:36,480
Speaker 2: gonna say free. Yeah, it's not like you know how sometimes

885
00:44:36,520 --> 00:44:39,560
Speaker 2: people that are free I'm putting in air quotes like

886
00:44:39,560 --> 00:44:43,840
Speaker 2: that free speech are like a like liveing a fence.

887
00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:47,719
Speaker 2: She doesn't. She's just like, yeah here I am. Yeah, yeah,

888
00:44:47,760 --> 00:44:49,160
Speaker 2: once a year would never work for me. I just

889
00:44:49,160 --> 00:44:52,600
Speaker 2: want to be really clear. I would never Oh yeah's

890
00:44:52,640 --> 00:44:56,680
Speaker 2: a bigger woman than I am. I again, I this

891
00:44:56,760 --> 00:45:03,719
Speaker 2: is my have to stay politically correct and things. I

892
00:45:03,760 --> 00:45:08,520
Speaker 2: gave mine seven but not because I said so. No.

893
00:45:09,719 --> 00:45:13,520
Speaker 2: But if it works for you, that's great. I just

894
00:45:13,560 --> 00:45:16,840
Speaker 2: know for me that ain't gonna fly. No. Same And

895
00:45:17,440 --> 00:45:22,200
Speaker 2: I'm a little territorial Cramer, I mean you and I

896
00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:25,759
Speaker 2: both Yeah, I'm but no, that's mine. Yeah, I set

897
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:29,440
Speaker 2: like it gets a little like that geo like animal kingdom.

898
00:45:29,480 --> 00:45:31,720
Speaker 2: For me, I just well and I have and again

899
00:45:31,760 --> 00:45:36,400
Speaker 2: I believe in the you know, the respect and the

900
00:45:36,440 --> 00:45:38,840
Speaker 2: love and that it will be hard. But that doesn't

901
00:45:38,880 --> 00:45:42,279
Speaker 2: mean to go sleep with someone else, no, and personally

902
00:45:42,400 --> 00:45:45,000
Speaker 2: for me in my relationships. And that's what I think

903
00:45:45,200 --> 00:45:47,600
Speaker 2: is so cool though it is about these conversations is

904
00:45:47,640 --> 00:45:50,919
Speaker 2: like it is. I felt like for a long long

905
00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:54,680
Speaker 2: time everyone was quiet. It was like the minute someone

906
00:45:54,719 --> 00:45:57,400
Speaker 2: made a mistake in a marriage, no one was working

907
00:45:57,480 --> 00:45:59,960
Speaker 2: on it. Like my Dallas mom Pam was the first

908
00:46:00,120 --> 00:46:01,680
Speaker 2: person to sit down with me and be like, Okay,

909
00:46:01,719 --> 00:46:03,200
Speaker 2: she was on her third husband when she was open

910
00:46:03,239 --> 00:46:05,799
Speaker 2: about loved it, and she was like, listen, it's not

911
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:09,040
Speaker 2: always incredible. You really have to work well. And that's

912
00:46:09,040 --> 00:46:12,000
Speaker 2: the thing too, Like we've both been a cheater in

913
00:46:12,080 --> 00:46:15,120
Speaker 2: past relationships, and it's like I don't want that for that,

914
00:46:15,280 --> 00:46:18,759
Speaker 2: Like that's not who I wasn't wanting to be or

915
00:46:18,800 --> 00:46:21,080
Speaker 2: intending to be or any of those things, you know.

916
00:46:21,239 --> 00:46:23,879
Speaker 2: So like, and I think some people just don't work

917
00:46:23,920 --> 00:46:26,719
Speaker 2: well together too. Yes, I just talked to someone the

918
00:46:26,719 --> 00:46:28,360
Speaker 2: other day who's going through divorce and she was like,

919
00:46:28,360 --> 00:46:30,359
Speaker 2: I mean he's a good person, and I'm like, yeah,

920
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:34,400
Speaker 2: it's okay that you don't mesh together either, right, Like,

921
00:46:34,520 --> 00:46:39,480
Speaker 2: no matter the work. Wow, Craamer, we really went all

922
00:46:39,520 --> 00:46:42,120
Speaker 2: over today. How's the contractions? I mean, I had a

923
00:46:41,840 --> 00:46:45,439
Speaker 2: strong one. While I was talking to her, I hope

924
00:46:45,480 --> 00:46:49,440
Speaker 2: it's today. I feel ready. It's funny to feel ready

925
00:46:49,480 --> 00:46:53,160
Speaker 2: because I've been so like hopeless romantic because I know

926
00:46:53,239 --> 00:46:57,160
Speaker 2: this is my last time. That's the emotional part. Yeah,

927
00:46:57,320 --> 00:47:01,879
Speaker 2: like I here we go. Oh, I know, nobod, it's good.

928
00:47:02,960 --> 00:47:08,160
Speaker 2: Why you crying because that's what I do. No, it's

929
00:47:08,200 --> 00:47:10,719
Speaker 2: just hot when it's your last. Like, I didn't think

930
00:47:10,719 --> 00:47:13,719
Speaker 2: i'd even get to do this again. So I've just hear. Yeah.

931
00:47:13,960 --> 00:47:16,759
Speaker 2: I mean I acted like legend was our last anyways,

932
00:47:16,800 --> 00:47:18,719
Speaker 2: and I soaked it up, and you know me, I'm

933
00:47:18,760 --> 00:47:22,960
Speaker 2: just such a feeling creature anyways. But yeah, I'm like

934
00:47:23,000 --> 00:47:25,080
Speaker 2: really ready to know who this person is. And then

935
00:47:25,320 --> 00:47:27,839
Speaker 2: I just also am like, oh, like every kick, I'm

936
00:47:27,880 --> 00:47:30,040
Speaker 2: like taking videos. It's like I can't bottle it up

937
00:47:30,080 --> 00:47:34,760
Speaker 2: fast enough. It's a lot. When more week, maybe less,

938
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:38,920
Speaker 2: maybe another hour? Well, my last baby, why don't you

939
00:47:39,960 --> 00:47:44,960
Speaker 2: send us off? Oh creamer, goodbye house, Goodbye pregnant belly.

940
00:47:45,200 --> 00:47:47,080
Speaker 2: Next time we are on Windown, we'll be out of

941
00:47:47,120 --> 00:47:50,720
Speaker 2: a different location and down one lass heartbeat on the couch.

942
00:47:52,080 --> 00:47:54,000
Speaker 2: I love you, I love you too. This is a

943
00:47:54,000 --> 00:47:56,200
Speaker 2: good end of the chapter. Front I'm proud of you.

944
00:47:56,360 --> 00:47:58,799
Speaker 2: Proud of you baby. Let's pack a box and have

945
00:47:58,840 --> 00:48:03,040
Speaker 2: a baby. Okay, yours not mine. Mine's too soon. Go

946
00:48:03,200 --> 00:48:14,000
Speaker 2: bye and bye. Mhm